What could be worse
than being quarantined
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during the COVID-19 pandemic?
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How about being
quarantined with an abuser?
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Stay tuned to
find out what to do
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if that's your reality
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or the
experience of a loved one.
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My name is Yvonne Shelton,
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and you're
watching Urban Report.
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Hello, and
welcome to Urban Report.
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My guest today
is Lizzie Harrison,
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Founder and Director of
Harrison's Referral Service,
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and a champion for
victims of domestic violence.
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Welcome to Urban Report.
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I'm hugging you.
It's a COVID hug.
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Oh, thank you. So
blessing to be home.
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Oh, yeah, it's so
great to have you here.
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You know, you're not a stranger
to 3ABN or to Dare to Dream,
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we've had you on before
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because what you
bring is so significant.
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And there's so many
people dealing with the subject
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that we're going
to talk about today.
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Yes, yes.
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And that's
domestic violence. Yes.
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Before we get into that, Lizzie,
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and for those who
may just have tuned in
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for the first time,
and they might not know
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who you are, or
what your experience is?
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Just share a little
bit of your journey with us
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if you would, so that
people will get to know you?
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Well, my name
is Lizzie Harrison,
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Founder of Emmanuel Food Pantry
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and Harrison's
Referral Services in St. Louis.
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I was a victim
of domestic violence
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about 15 years ago.
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And I decided to turn my pain
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into power by helping others
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through domestic violence,
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those who are displaced
due to domestic violence,
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women and their children.
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That's beautiful.
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And what do you say, you know,
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there are people
who aren't familiar
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with the whole cycle of
domestic violence and abuse.
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What do you say to
people who say to you,
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why don't they just leave?
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Why don't they just...
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Why don't they just
leave and get away from there?
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What do you say to
people who say that?
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Well, actually, that's
the number one question
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that people always ask.
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And I remember
when someone asked me,
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you know, "Why
don't you just leave?"
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You know, it's not that
easy especially when your abuser
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is the sole
breadwinner of the home.
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When, you know,
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you're totally
dependent upon your abuser,
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or your spouse,
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or whoever your
significant other,
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and you have children.
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You know, it's kind
of hard to see yourself
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raising the
children on your own,
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how you're going to, you know,
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take care of
everything financially,
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that's the first thing
that goes through your mind.
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And that usually
makes you stay awhile.
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Yeah.
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And I think also and tell me
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if I'm right or
wrong about this.
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The abuse doesn't
necessarily happen every day.
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So you keep thinking, well,
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maybe it won't
happen again, or maybe
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they'll just be some long period
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before it happens again,
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or maybe since he
said he was so sorry,
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he won't do it again.
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And so, you give
it one more chance.
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And then you give
it one more chance,
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and then you give
it one more chance.
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And before you know it,
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you've been in
there for way longer
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than you probably should have.
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Years, sometimes years.
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And, you know, sad to say that
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the abuse does happen every day.
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It might not be physical,
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but the
emotional, psychological,
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spiritual,
economic abuse, you know,
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but it does happen every day.
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The abuser
trains you on a cycle.
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It's almost like
you're on a wheel,
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and you get immune to it.
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And one thing I found out
even in my situation is that
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when you become codependent,
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an independent person
can become codependent.
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Explain that,
unpack that a little bit?
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What that mean
is that, you know,
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if you're used to
being an independent person,
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outgoing, you have a lot
going for yourself, you know,
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education, even if
you're not, you know, educated,
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forced to college
and things in that area,
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but just have a
lot going for yourself,
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and used to being
out with other people
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and making your own,
you know, life happen.
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You know what I mean?
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So, and then you get
involved with an abuser.
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The next thing, you know,
you're not yourself anymore.
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You know, I call
domestic violence
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another form of identity theft.
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The abuser takes your
identity away from you,
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so you can be
codependent on them.
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You know, they'll tell you,
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"Oh, you don't
have to work anymore.
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I'll pay all the bills.
I'll take care of everything."
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But that is another means
of control, economic abuse.
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So that way, if you ever
tried to leave the abuser,
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you will second guess it
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because you're not
financially stable.
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That's very interesting.
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It's another form
of identity theft.
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So you kind of get
absorbed into their world versus
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you having your own
life like you did before.
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And then having
theirs, now you get absorbed
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into their agenda and
what they want for you
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versus you just being able to do
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what you want as
an independent person.
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Yes.
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And, you know, what
I've also learned too,
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is that there's
another form of abuse
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called narcissistic
personality disorder,
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which is NPD, which is
actually has a lot to do
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with domestic violence.
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It's more of a
spiritual, demonic type abuse.
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It really makes you feel that
you really need this person,
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this person really loves you.
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And you would do
anything for them
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not knowing that the
whole time, you know,
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that they're using you,
they're controlling you,
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they will separate
you from your family,
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they don't want
you to be independent,
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because if you get strong
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and you're around
other strong people,
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then you will come
to realize the situation
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that you're in, and
then you'll be drawn away
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from the abuser.
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So that's why they
like to isolate you,
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they don't want you working,
family, friends, no one.
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They want you to feel
like they are your world.
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Wow!
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So that's that,
again that identity theft.
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Yes. That's very interesting.
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So if, let's say, I
used to have a friend
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who was in an
abusive relationship,
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and I saw what was going on,
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and I even took a class to see
if I could help her to leave.
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What would you say
are some of the signs?
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If you have a friend
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and you kind of think maybe
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they're in an
abusive relationship,
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but you're not sure.
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What are some of the signs
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that they're in an
abusive relationship?
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Well, first, if it's physical,
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you'll notice if they
wear a makeup and they're not,
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you know, they don't usually
wear a makeup, sunglasses.
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A lot of times, if you
have a good relationship
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with a friend,
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and they can't
give you eye contact,
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they always make an
excuses, canceling plans.
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You know, you have
your girlfriend days out,
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you go do things together,
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they just don't
sound like themselves
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and feel like themselves,
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you can kind of
have that connection
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with them to know that
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something's
really, really wrong.
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Now, some of them are
really good at hiding it.
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Really good at hiding it.
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And I can say before,
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I was really
good at hiding it too,
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as well, because of the shame
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and embarrassment
for people to know that.
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You know, if
you've married someone
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that's an abuser,
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if they don't
physically abuse you,
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they mentally, emotionally,
and verbally abuse you.
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And so sometimes, you know,
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we don't want to
expose the abuser,
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because it's a reflection of us.
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That's good. That's good.
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I think that
people need to know that
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there are signs and
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if you see
someone that's in that,
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somebody close to you
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that's in that
kind of relationship.
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You need to say
something, encourage them.
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What should the onlooker do?
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How can you help somebody
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who's in an
abusive relationship?
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Well, with
Harrison's Referral Services
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and my coaching
and support groups,
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I encourage people
to be very careful,
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you know, with asking questions
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and helping because
you have to understand
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that they're in
abusive relationship
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and they can lose their life.
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And you can lose
your life too, as well.
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So the best thing
to do to approach them,
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you know, to say,
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"Hey, is there
anything going on,
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you know, that, you know,
I love you, I'm here for you.
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If you feel like
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you want to talk about anything.
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I just feel that
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something's not
going on with you,
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went well with you.
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And if you like to
talk, I'm here for you."
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That's the best
thing to go with first.
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Usually, they just want
someone to listen to them.
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They don't want to
hear, I told you so.
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Right.
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Because they already know that
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they're in a bad
relationship or bad situation.
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And you just want
someone to be there to listen.
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And you can't
force them to leave.
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It's going to
have to be something
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that they
actually really want to do.
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And sometimes, you know,
they can leave, you know,
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when they shouldn't
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and sometimes a lot
of victims are not too,
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you know, I would
say lucky with leaving.
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Should you ever
call the police about it?
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Well, I would say if you hear,
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you know, noises or
hear things that you know
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that's not right
to call the police.
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Like if he is a neighbor.
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Is a neighbor, you
never know what's going on.
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I wouldn't feel right, you know,
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knowing I hear
something next door
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or right next to me
and not call the police.
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But just be very, very careful.
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You don't go out
and knock on the door
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and then say, "Hey, you
know, what are you doing?
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I'm gonna call the
police," because the person
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can have a gun or whatever,
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and they can kill the victim
and also kill you as well,
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especially when
you're dealing with people
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with multiple personalities.
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NPD covert and overt narcissist,
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you know, you
have to be very careful
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because you're dealing
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with the psyche of
another individual.
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So you don't want to
put your life at stake,
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so it's just best to
just call the police.
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Right. That's good.
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That's good.
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We are living in this
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whole COVID-19 pandemic time.
00:10:01.33\00:10:06.37
How has that impacted
victims of domestic abuse?
00:10:06.40\00:10:11.21
How is that?
00:10:11.24\00:10:12.57
How has the COVID-19
pandemic impacted the victims?
00:10:12.61\00:10:17.15
Quarantined in
silence with an abuser
00:10:17.18\00:10:20.45
is no one was expecting,
you know, this pandemic.
00:10:20.48\00:10:25.75
And I just felt so
sorry for the victims
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because I know that now since,
00:10:29.89\00:10:31.73
you know, a lot of
places are shut down.
00:10:31.76\00:10:36.03
Things are closing up early.
00:10:36.06\00:10:38.03
With the pandemic,
00:10:38.07\00:10:39.40
you really can't get out
and do what you usually do.
00:10:39.43\00:10:41.80
People are losing
their jobs, finances.
00:10:41.84\00:10:45.21
A lot of abusers
now are drinking alcohol
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more heavily,
they're doing drugs,
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they don't have an outlet.
00:10:50.21\00:10:52.68
And so what happens?
00:10:52.71\00:10:54.85
They use the victims
as their punching bag.
00:10:54.88\00:10:57.99
They abuse the
children, they abuse.
00:10:58.02\00:11:00.39
And I want to be clear that
00:11:00.42\00:11:01.82
an abuser can
not only be a male,
00:11:01.86\00:11:04.29
but can also be a female.
00:11:04.33\00:11:05.83
So there is no
certain status here,
00:11:05.86\00:11:08.16
it could be either or.
00:11:08.20\00:11:09.60
But in this instance, the
most majority of the cases
00:11:09.63\00:11:12.03
that I've had, and
the majority of cases
00:11:12.07\00:11:13.84
I deal with are
males that are abusers.
00:11:13.87\00:11:18.27
And so a lot of
them are quarantined
00:11:18.31\00:11:19.87
with their abusers and
they don't have a voice,
00:11:19.91\00:11:22.74
they don't know what to
do, they don't have an outlet.
00:11:22.78\00:11:25.91
And with the COVID-19
going on, a lot of the shelters
00:11:25.95\00:11:29.12
with all the
protocols and different things
00:11:29.15\00:11:31.62
that are going on
with the pandemic,
00:11:31.65\00:11:33.36
they're very
cautious about letting people
00:11:33.39\00:11:34.76
into the shelters now.
00:11:34.79\00:11:36.83
The victims don't
really have more outlets,
00:11:36.86\00:11:39.13
don't have enough
outlets to go to now.
00:11:39.16\00:11:41.20
And so, they're
stuck where they are.
00:11:41.23\00:11:43.00
And they feel that,
well, I can't get out
00:11:43.03\00:11:45.03
and get a job
if there's no jobs.
00:11:45.07\00:11:47.34
If my spouse is not working
00:11:47.37\00:11:49.00
or my significant
other is not working,
00:11:49.04\00:11:52.07
how can I be able to...
00:11:52.11\00:11:53.44
How can I go out to be
able to regain my independence,
00:11:53.48\00:11:57.85
you know, into society
00:11:57.88\00:11:59.21
and be a single
mother to raise my children?
00:11:59.25\00:12:01.48
And so they stay,
00:12:01.52\00:12:03.42
even though it might
cost them their lives.
00:12:03.45\00:12:06.32
You know, I hadn't
thought about that,
00:12:06.35\00:12:08.89
you know, when you think about
00:12:08.92\00:12:10.26
the
inconveniences of the pandemic
00:12:10.29\00:12:12.93
and you're stuck
in wherever you are,
00:12:12.96\00:12:15.40
and you shouldn't go
here and there, whatever.
00:12:15.43\00:12:17.57
I had not thought about
the impact on the victims
00:12:17.60\00:12:23.10
of domestic violence.
00:12:23.14\00:12:24.47
Think about it,
you are trapped in that
00:12:24.51\00:12:27.74
closed environment with them.
00:12:27.78\00:12:29.71
And if they're abusing alcohol
or any kind of substance,
00:12:29.74\00:12:33.25
that exacerbates the
situation so that they're worse.
00:12:33.28\00:12:37.79
They are acting out worse,
00:12:37.82\00:12:40.32
because now
they're under the influence
00:12:40.36\00:12:42.42
of some substance.
00:12:42.46\00:12:44.16
And then so, and
you're stuck there.
00:12:44.19\00:12:47.10
You cannot, you know,
if you're not working,
00:12:47.13\00:12:49.53
if they've laid
you off, or whatever,
00:12:49.56\00:12:51.27
if your jobs laid you
off, you are stuck there.
00:12:51.30\00:12:53.17
Yeah.
00:12:53.20\00:12:54.54
So have you been getting,
00:12:54.57\00:12:56.00
at Harrison's Referral Services,
00:12:56.04\00:12:58.27
have you been getting a
lot of cases of women or men
00:12:58.31\00:13:03.85
who have been
victimized by this pandemic?
00:13:03.88\00:13:07.15
Oh, yes, very much so.
00:13:07.18\00:13:08.52
Actually, before I even came,
I had a couple of phone calls.
00:13:08.55\00:13:12.12
Before I got here,
00:13:12.15\00:13:13.49
I have a lot of
calls throughout today.
00:13:13.52\00:13:16.06
The majority
are women in church,
00:13:16.09\00:13:19.86
and the Christian churches
is a lot that is going on.
00:13:19.89\00:13:24.23
I think, now
during the pandemic,
00:13:24.27\00:13:27.47
a lot of leaders in the churches
00:13:27.50\00:13:31.31
of all denominations
are being exposed now
00:13:31.34\00:13:36.54
to being an abuser.
00:13:36.58\00:13:39.05
And also too,
00:13:39.08\00:13:40.58
you have to
understand that, you know,
00:13:40.62\00:13:41.95
there's nothing else to
do at home besides, you know,
00:13:41.98\00:13:44.12
you can go right and
you can do so much at home,
00:13:44.15\00:13:46.02
you can only do so much.
00:13:46.05\00:13:47.39
Wi-Fi, a lot of the abusers
00:13:47.42\00:13:49.39
are abusing pornography.
00:13:49.42\00:13:54.16
Pornography is on the
rise. Incest is on the rise.
00:13:54.20\00:14:00.10
A lot of things are
taking place in the home
00:14:00.14\00:14:02.14
that we are not even aware of.
00:14:02.17\00:14:04.34
Our minds cannot
even fathom of the things
00:14:04.37\00:14:06.94
that a lot of the
victims are going through.
00:14:06.98\00:14:09.94
I've had a phone call yesterday
00:14:09.98\00:14:11.98
where a sister called
and she was just crying out
00:14:12.01\00:14:14.38
and she's just, she's broken.
00:14:14.42\00:14:16.52
She's just done
00:14:16.55\00:14:17.89
and she just
can't take it anymore.
00:14:17.92\00:14:19.29
And, you know,
00:14:19.32\00:14:20.66
you really can't
tell them what to do.
00:14:20.69\00:14:23.69
You can only give them ideas
00:14:23.73\00:14:25.19
and safety tips on
how to move forward.
00:14:25.23\00:14:27.93
But they have to make
that decision for themselves.
00:14:27.96\00:14:30.70
But I hope and pray that
they make the right decision
00:14:30.73\00:14:33.10
because there's so
many women and children,
00:14:33.13\00:14:35.70
including men
have lost their lives.
00:14:35.74\00:14:37.47
There's so much
violence going on.
00:14:37.51\00:14:39.37
Look at all the
cases on the news about
00:14:39.41\00:14:41.84
so many more
domestic violence cases,
00:14:41.88\00:14:44.05
and not to the point
where it's just physical abuse
00:14:44.08\00:14:47.92
and the
emotional, psychological,
00:14:47.95\00:14:49.48
they are actually
killing the mothers there.
00:14:49.52\00:14:53.92
Some of them are being pregnant,
00:14:53.96\00:14:55.29
they're killing them in
front of their children.
00:14:55.32\00:14:57.16
So I have had a
lot of different cases,
00:14:57.19\00:15:00.70
a lot of things that
I have been exposed to.
00:15:00.73\00:15:04.07
Sometimes I just play
all of that back in my head.
00:15:04.10\00:15:06.33
And some days, I just
have to go and regroup.
00:15:06.37\00:15:09.74
Take me a few days
to get my energy back
00:15:09.77\00:15:11.67
and my strength back
because I know of all the cases
00:15:11.71\00:15:15.04
that are happening
and what's going on.
00:15:15.08\00:15:16.64
And so, I just want
to continue to be a voice
00:15:16.68\00:15:19.45
for the victims
of domestic violence.
00:15:19.48\00:15:23.28
I want to be able to
let people understand that
00:15:23.32\00:15:25.92
domestic
violence is not a program.
00:15:25.95\00:15:28.22
Domestic violence awareness
00:15:28.26\00:15:29.59
is not something
you do once a year
00:15:29.62\00:15:31.09
or you talk about
every now and then.
00:15:31.13\00:15:33.13
People lives are at stake,
children's lives are at stake.
00:15:33.16\00:15:36.13
And now since school
is starting back now,
00:15:36.16\00:15:38.90
and there's homeschooling,
guess what's happening?
00:15:38.93\00:15:41.00
The kids are at home,
they're being more exposed
00:15:41.04\00:15:43.61
to the abuse
than where they were
00:15:43.64\00:15:45.37
when they were
going into the classrooms.
00:15:45.41\00:15:47.21
So true, because now they're,
00:15:47.24\00:15:48.98
you know, they're
around it all day.
00:15:49.01\00:15:50.85
If the parents
aren't employed somewhere,
00:15:50.88\00:15:53.62
now they're
seeing it all day long.
00:15:53.65\00:15:56.15
So what strategies
do you offer people
00:15:56.18\00:15:59.22
who are quarantined?
00:15:59.25\00:16:01.52
What do you tell them that
they can do during this time?
00:16:01.56\00:16:06.90
Because, I mean,
I don't even know.
00:16:06.93\00:16:09.06
It's like, it's a trap. It is.
00:16:09.10\00:16:11.90
They must feel so trapped.
00:16:11.93\00:16:13.47
So what do you tell them?
00:16:13.50\00:16:15.04
Well, I would say, you know,
00:16:15.07\00:16:16.40
if you know you are
going through domestic violence
00:16:16.44\00:16:18.31
or you a victim of abuse
of any kind, of any kind,
00:16:18.34\00:16:22.68
that you can try to
reach out into any programs
00:16:22.71\00:16:26.01
or Google phone numbers
00:16:26.05\00:16:28.65
or resources or
call the hotline.
00:16:28.68\00:16:30.72
Yeah, seek with the hotlines,
00:16:30.75\00:16:32.49
or you can call
Harrison's Referral Services.
00:16:32.52\00:16:34.66
Excuse me, that
is the first step.
00:16:34.69\00:16:37.29
And we need to put your
website up on the screen too,
00:16:37.33\00:16:40.50
so that people can know
00:16:40.53\00:16:42.60
how to reach you
because this is important,
00:16:42.63\00:16:46.77
programs like
yours are important.
00:16:46.80\00:16:48.40
I didn't mean to
interrupt you. Go ahead.
00:16:48.44\00:16:49.77
No, it's okay.
00:16:49.80\00:16:51.14
And now you think about
what about the children.
00:16:51.17\00:16:52.57
So if the mother or the man,
00:16:52.61\00:16:55.84
whoever's going
through the abuse,
00:16:55.88\00:16:57.35
and they don't have strength
to hold themselves together,
00:16:57.38\00:17:00.22
then you have the children.
00:17:00.25\00:17:02.05
They're being
abused too as well.
00:17:02.08\00:17:04.29
And so what about the
children and then, you know,
00:17:04.32\00:17:06.96
there's is no income,
they're short of food at home.
00:17:06.99\00:17:11.39
People unthreaded,
their utilities being cut off
00:17:11.43\00:17:13.40
and shut off and
things like that.
00:17:13.43\00:17:15.46
And it's just
that I just feel like
00:17:15.50\00:17:18.00
they are in a war
zone, they're in a war path.
00:17:18.03\00:17:22.47
And that they don't
know how to reach out,
00:17:22.50\00:17:24.81
they don't know who to talk to,
they don't know who to trust.
00:17:24.84\00:17:28.14
They can't go to
family and friends,
00:17:28.18\00:17:30.55
because the
abuse has isolated them
00:17:30.58\00:17:32.08
from their families and friends.
00:17:32.11\00:17:33.62
And if they do talk to
the family and friends,
00:17:33.65\00:17:35.65
the first thing
we usually get is,
00:17:35.68\00:17:37.02
I told you so.
00:17:37.05\00:17:39.29
And as a victim
of domestic violence,
00:17:39.32\00:17:41.59
you don't want
to hear I told you
00:17:41.62\00:17:43.56
so because all those things
00:17:43.59\00:17:44.96
are playing in
your mind already,
00:17:44.99\00:17:47.16
the regret, the
shame, the guilt of saying,
00:17:47.20\00:17:51.00
"How did I get
myself into the situation?
00:17:51.03\00:17:53.84
How did I allow the red flags?
00:17:53.87\00:17:57.01
You know, how can I
look over the red flags?
00:17:57.04\00:17:59.07
And now look at the
situation that I'm in now."
00:17:59.11\00:18:00.74
Yes, yes.
00:18:00.78\00:18:02.11
And you brought
some pictures with you,
00:18:02.14\00:18:03.48
want to put up
in just a second...
00:18:03.51\00:18:04.85
Yes, we brought a
couple of pictures.
00:18:04.88\00:18:06.21
That you can kind
of walk us through,
00:18:06.25\00:18:08.08
you know, explain what they are.
00:18:08.12\00:18:09.45
Yes, I would love
to. So, what's this?
00:18:09.48\00:18:11.92
Well, actually, some
of our ladies got together
00:18:11.95\00:18:15.16
and we had some
new refugee families
00:18:15.19\00:18:17.76
that had came in to America
00:18:17.79\00:18:19.16
from different
parts of the country.
00:18:19.19\00:18:21.03
And so we may give bags for...
00:18:21.06\00:18:22.56
You mean from other
countries? From other countries.
00:18:22.60\00:18:24.17
Yes, I have women
of all different types
00:18:24.20\00:18:26.37
of nationalities are
part of the ministry,
00:18:26.40\00:18:28.54
so we may give bags for
them for the children, yes.
00:18:28.57\00:18:30.21
Nice.
00:18:30.24\00:18:32.84
Oh, this one
here is we were having
00:18:32.87\00:18:34.88
a women's support group.
00:18:34.91\00:18:36.31
And we had Christmas in July.
00:18:36.34\00:18:39.65
And I like to give
gifts to the ladies you know,
00:18:39.68\00:18:41.98
throughout the
year we get out and do,
00:18:42.02\00:18:43.65
you know, workshops we do.
00:18:43.69\00:18:45.45
We go out and
give prayer to people
00:18:45.49\00:18:47.19
and we go out
00:18:47.22\00:18:49.22
and do all type
of community work.
00:18:49.26\00:18:50.79
So I always like
to try to give them
00:18:50.83\00:18:52.16
some little gifts to join, yes.
00:18:52.19\00:18:55.40
Well, with the
Emmanuel Food Pantry,
00:18:55.43\00:18:56.77
we have a food truck as well.
00:18:56.80\00:18:58.53
And so, we feed
hundreds of families a week.
00:18:58.57\00:19:01.34
And so when the food truck come,
00:19:01.37\00:19:02.80
the ladies get out
and we unload the trucks
00:19:02.84\00:19:04.87
and we feed all the
families in the community.
00:19:04.91\00:19:07.71
Wow! That's wonderful.
00:19:07.74\00:19:10.45
That is our new location
00:19:10.48\00:19:12.35
that we have in North St. Louis.
00:19:12.38\00:19:14.98
We all got
together and we rehab,
00:19:15.02\00:19:16.69
we were rehabbing the place.
00:19:16.72\00:19:18.05
We did all the
work ourselves. Wow!
00:19:18.09\00:19:19.95
Yes. And we rehab the place.
00:19:19.99\00:19:22.12
It was beautiful.
That's incredible.
00:19:22.16\00:19:23.49
Yes.
00:19:23.53\00:19:24.86
So with the food pantry,
00:19:24.89\00:19:26.63
where do you get the food
00:19:26.66\00:19:28.20
from that you're
feeding the community?
00:19:28.23\00:19:30.17
Well, we get some of our food
00:19:30.20\00:19:31.53
from the St.
Louis area food bank,
00:19:31.57\00:19:32.97
Operation Food Search,
private donors, volunteers,
00:19:33.00\00:19:38.04
church members and friends,
00:19:38.07\00:19:39.94
and people in the community
like to donate to it as well.
00:19:39.97\00:19:42.48
So what do you use?
What do you give them?
00:19:42.51\00:19:44.11
Like what kinds of
foods are you giving them?
00:19:44.15\00:19:46.31
Anything you can imagine. Wow.
00:19:46.35\00:19:48.35
Everything that you go to
the grocery store and get,
00:19:48.38\00:19:50.72
you're going to find
it on our food truck.
00:19:50.75\00:19:52.29
Oh, wow.
00:19:52.32\00:19:53.66
And that's not a
maybe and not a if.
00:19:53.69\00:19:55.72
So you can just give
them, there's no cost for it.
00:19:55.76\00:19:59.39
They just receive this free.
00:19:59.43\00:20:00.90
Everything is free
and open to the public
00:20:00.93\00:20:03.43
due to the COVID-19.
00:20:03.47\00:20:04.80
Now we just have
the drive up service
00:20:04.83\00:20:06.17
where they drive their cars up,
00:20:06.20\00:20:07.84
we open up the
trunk of their cars
00:20:07.87\00:20:09.67
and we load them up.
00:20:09.70\00:20:11.11
Each family gets at
least over $500 or $600
00:20:11.14\00:20:13.61
worth of food a week.
00:20:13.64\00:20:14.98
A week?
00:20:15.01\00:20:16.34
A week, maybe more,
00:20:16.38\00:20:18.28
maybe more than
that per car load.
00:20:18.31\00:20:20.88
And the good thing
about our services is that,
00:20:20.92\00:20:23.95
you know, you
can come to the line
00:20:23.99\00:20:25.85
as many times as you
like until everything is gone.
00:20:25.89\00:20:30.13
And so some families
have to go home and unload,
00:20:30.16\00:20:32.39
and then they'll come back.
00:20:32.43\00:20:34.30
We also have food for
the refugee community.
00:20:34.33\00:20:39.03
North St. Louis as
well as South St. Louis.
00:20:39.07\00:20:41.40
You have a lot of
refugees in that area?
00:20:41.44\00:20:43.17
Yes, in South St. Louis,
from all different countries.
00:20:43.20\00:20:46.21
So sometimes I
just take a food truck
00:20:46.24\00:20:48.28
just to their
community, just for them.
00:20:48.31\00:20:51.21
And a lot of them don't
have cars and transportation.
00:20:51.25\00:20:53.08
So I send the food
trucks to their community.
00:20:53.11\00:20:55.72
Now what made you start that?
00:20:55.75\00:20:57.69
Well, I was a victim of
domestic violence in 2001.
00:20:57.72\00:21:01.46
And I decided to
turn my pain into power.
00:21:01.49\00:21:05.36
And when I was
going through abuse,
00:21:05.39\00:21:06.93
I had to go to food
pantries to feed my children.
00:21:06.96\00:21:10.27
I was working
but it wasn't enough.
00:21:10.30\00:21:12.63
And I remember
00:21:12.67\00:21:14.00
when I walked
into one food pantry,
00:21:14.04\00:21:15.77
the lady said, "Well, you know,
00:21:15.80\00:21:17.14
we usually, you know,
give you a bag of food."
00:21:17.17\00:21:18.94
But she says, "I don't know
00:21:18.97\00:21:20.31
what it is, there's
something about you."
00:21:20.34\00:21:21.68
And this is
like 15-16 years ago.
00:21:21.71\00:21:24.41
She said, "I'm
gonna let you walk in
00:21:24.45\00:21:25.85
and pick out whatever you want.
00:21:25.88\00:21:27.45
You pick out
whatever you want to eat."
00:21:27.48\00:21:29.98
And when I walked in there,
00:21:30.02\00:21:31.35
and I saw the
whole wall full of food
00:21:31.39\00:21:32.89
and tears was
coming, rolling down my eyes
00:21:32.92\00:21:34.69
as I was packing the food,
00:21:34.72\00:21:36.12
and I didn't
want to get too much,
00:21:36.16\00:21:37.49
even though I needed more.
00:21:37.53\00:21:38.86
She goes, you know,
get whatever you want.
00:21:38.89\00:21:40.76
And when I
looked at those walls,
00:21:40.80\00:21:42.16
I said a prayer in my mind,
00:21:42.20\00:21:43.53
I said, "God, if
You get me on my feet,"
00:21:43.57\00:21:47.37
and hoo, I want to get emotional
00:21:47.40\00:21:49.44
with, I said, "God,
if You get me on my feet,
00:21:49.47\00:21:52.21
I want to be able to give back,
00:21:52.24\00:21:54.24
and I want to be able to
do the same thing for others."
00:21:54.28\00:21:56.85
And so for the last 23 years,
00:21:56.88\00:22:00.38
I've been feeding
hundreds of families,
00:22:00.42\00:22:03.15
hundreds of families.
00:22:03.18\00:22:04.52
And this past Friday, we,
00:22:04.55\00:22:06.96
Monday we fed
about 200 families.
00:22:06.99\00:22:08.89
So with, all week,
00:22:08.92\00:22:10.79
I can say almost
500 families a week.
00:22:10.83\00:22:13.36
Wow!
00:22:13.40\00:22:14.73
God has expanded my ministry.
00:22:14.76\00:22:16.70
Yes. Look at God.
00:22:16.73\00:22:18.63
Yes, so beautiful.
00:22:18.67\00:22:20.07
Look at God and look at
how gracious He's been to you.
00:22:20.10\00:22:24.41
He got you out of
that that situation
00:22:24.44\00:22:26.54
and gave you a ministry
that lets you help others
00:22:26.57\00:22:30.31
who were in your situation.
00:22:30.35\00:22:32.38
And that's what, you know,
00:22:32.41\00:22:33.85
that's why we
are to comfort others
00:22:33.88\00:22:36.48
with the comfort
00:22:36.52\00:22:37.85
with which we've been comforted.
00:22:37.89\00:22:39.22
I love that verse,
00:22:39.25\00:22:40.59
because that's
what you're doing.
00:22:40.62\00:22:43.73
You've been
comforted in a certain way.
00:22:43.76\00:22:45.76
And now you're using
that to comfort others.
00:22:45.79\00:22:49.26
And that is beautiful.
00:22:49.30\00:22:50.63
Once you've been through abuse
you know how it is to hurt,
00:22:50.67\00:22:53.87
you know, the pain and
you don't reflect that pain
00:22:53.90\00:22:57.54
on to anyone else.
00:22:57.57\00:22:58.91
You don't abuse others
because you know how it feels.
00:22:58.94\00:23:02.01
And so, it...
00:23:02.04\00:23:03.85
That's if you
are well person. Yes.
00:23:03.88\00:23:05.78
And it helps, you
know, with empathy,
00:23:05.81\00:23:07.95
you have empathy,
00:23:07.98\00:23:09.32
you have more
compassion, you have more love.
00:23:09.35\00:23:12.42
And I will say this, I
have had a lot of struggles,
00:23:12.45\00:23:16.06
you know, with this ministry.
00:23:16.09\00:23:17.43
And what I mean
by that is the enemy
00:23:17.46\00:23:18.79
has not been happy at all
with what I've been doing.
00:23:18.83\00:23:21.83
And so, the enemy has
been trying to attack me
00:23:21.86\00:23:24.13
on a personal level, you know,
00:23:24.17\00:23:26.90
with, you know, smear campaigns
00:23:26.94\00:23:30.17
and all different
type of horrible things
00:23:30.21\00:23:32.44
to try to make me
out to be something that
00:23:32.47\00:23:34.04
I'm not because of who I serve.
00:23:34.08\00:23:38.58
And honestly I'm excited
about, it keeps me motivated.
00:23:38.61\00:23:42.05
Yeah.
00:23:42.08\00:23:44.29
If I keep it
coming, it motivates me,
00:23:44.32\00:23:46.55
keep me on my toes, keep
me on my knees in prayer,
00:23:46.59\00:23:50.36
reminds me that I'm
not in control of anything.
00:23:50.39\00:23:53.80
It reminds me that how much more
00:23:53.83\00:23:55.56
I need Jesus every day,
00:23:55.60\00:23:57.50
and it just keeps me in power.
00:23:57.53\00:23:59.20
So anywhere that
00:23:59.23\00:24:00.57
I can be a voice to
those who are hurting,
00:24:00.60\00:24:03.61
and to continue to
keep my strength up
00:24:03.64\00:24:05.44
and continue to be the woman
that God has called me to be,
00:24:05.47\00:24:08.61
the mother He
has called me to be,
00:24:08.64\00:24:10.45
the warrior He
has called me to be.
00:24:10.48\00:24:12.95
I was built not
to break. Come on.
00:24:12.98\00:24:16.55
I love that, I was
built not to break.
00:24:16.58\00:24:18.69
I love it.
00:24:18.72\00:24:20.06
So what are the
needs now that you have?
00:24:20.09\00:24:22.42
And trying to do this work,
00:24:22.46\00:24:24.26
what does Harrison's
Referral Service need
00:24:24.29\00:24:27.20
or what does
Emmanuel Food Pantry need?
00:24:27.23\00:24:29.30
What do you need?
00:24:29.33\00:24:30.67
Well, I will be honest, we
always need financial help.
00:24:30.70\00:24:34.14
But we are really in need of...
00:24:34.17\00:24:36.60
I would like to have
a 12 or 15 passenger van
00:24:36.64\00:24:40.74
where that when we do have
victims of domestic violence
00:24:40.78\00:24:43.08
that don't have transportation
00:24:43.11\00:24:45.75
to get to the shelters that
we are able to transport them.
00:24:45.78\00:24:51.45
Right now we have to
try to pay for taxi cabs
00:24:51.49\00:24:54.02
and things like
that to pick them up.
00:24:54.06\00:24:56.09
They have to meet
them at certain locations
00:24:56.12\00:24:57.76
and places of
safety to take them there,
00:24:57.79\00:24:59.73
but we want to be able
to do that too as well.
00:24:59.76\00:25:02.90
We would love for anyone
00:25:02.93\00:25:04.37
to have a vehicle
that they want to donate,
00:25:04.40\00:25:06.74
the finances for us to be
00:25:06.77\00:25:08.10
able to
purchase another vehicle,
00:25:08.14\00:25:09.84
or just financial
help any way possible.
00:25:09.87\00:25:13.71
Clothing,
toiletries, personal items,
00:25:13.74\00:25:16.64
anything that they can donate,
00:25:16.68\00:25:18.01
but most of all, we
really need the prayers.
00:25:18.05\00:25:19.75
But we really do need a vehicle.
00:25:19.78\00:25:21.95
We can take two vehicles, one,
00:25:21.98\00:25:23.52
but we will take
whatever we can get to be
00:25:23.55\00:25:25.62
able to continue to help.
00:25:25.65\00:25:27.22
So people can reach you
on the website, which is...
00:25:27.26\00:25:31.86
HarrisonsReferralServices.com,
00:25:31.89\00:25:34.46
or they can reach me
00:25:34.50\00:25:35.83
on my email at
Lizzieharrison@sbcglobal.net
00:25:35.86\00:25:40.54
Say that again.
00:25:40.57\00:25:41.90
Lizzieharrison@sbcglobal.net
00:25:41.94\00:25:45.84
or they can reach
me at 314-482-2594.
00:25:45.87\00:25:51.15
Great.
00:25:51.18\00:25:52.51
So they are all
these ways to reach you,
00:25:52.55\00:25:55.12
all these ways to
support what you're doing.
00:25:55.15\00:25:59.62
What you're doing
is so, so important.
00:25:59.65\00:26:02.09
Do you have a
quick closing thought
00:26:02.12\00:26:04.09
for our viewers?
00:26:04.13\00:26:05.46
Well, I would just say that
00:26:05.49\00:26:06.83
if you know you're
experiencing domestic violence
00:26:06.86\00:26:08.70
or you feel that
you're going through
00:26:08.73\00:26:10.07
or you know someone
is going through abuse,
00:26:10.10\00:26:12.73
please understand
that your help is needed.
00:26:12.77\00:26:16.20
If you hear
something, call the police,
00:26:16.24\00:26:18.57
but never involve yourself
00:26:18.61\00:26:20.11
in the middle of
the confrontation.
00:26:20.14\00:26:22.71
You want to stay as
anonymous as possible.
00:26:22.74\00:26:24.95
But if you cannot stay
anonymous, that's okay.
00:26:24.98\00:26:27.82
Be prayerful, ask God
to show you the safest
00:26:27.85\00:26:31.35
and healthiest way to escape.
00:26:31.39\00:26:33.59
And to give you the
resources that you need,
00:26:33.62\00:26:35.46
call the hotline
for domestic violence.
00:26:35.49\00:26:38.06
You can also call
Harrison's Referral Services.
00:26:38.09\00:26:40.80
Or as I said before,
Google other resources,
00:26:40.83\00:26:43.40
or just reach out
to family and friends,
00:26:43.43\00:26:45.10
especially your church family.
00:26:45.13\00:26:46.84
One thing I do want to
say before we close is that,
00:26:46.87\00:26:49.07
I would like to be
able to educate pastors
00:26:49.10\00:26:52.17
and church
leaders on how to deal
00:26:52.21\00:26:54.71
with domestic
violence in their churches
00:26:54.74\00:26:56.64
through men's
ministries, women's ministries,
00:26:56.68\00:26:59.58
or just reach out to your church
00:26:59.61\00:27:01.02
and find out what
resources they can,
00:27:01.05\00:27:02.98
you know, they can help
00:27:03.02\00:27:04.35
with to get you to
that safe location.
00:27:04.39\00:27:05.72
That's great.
00:27:05.75\00:27:07.09
So you're available to come
to different people's churches
00:27:07.12\00:27:09.86
to explain domestic
violence, to explain what to do,
00:27:09.89\00:27:14.03
to share with them
strategies of how to handle it?
00:27:14.06\00:27:16.87
Because we want the
church to know that, you know,
00:27:16.90\00:27:20.84
a lot of the
victims in your churches
00:27:20.87\00:27:22.74
are members of the church.
00:27:22.77\00:27:25.47
And you're gonna have to know
00:27:25.51\00:27:26.88
how to deal with
domestic violence.
00:27:26.91\00:27:28.61
You're gonna need to
know at least the protocol
00:27:28.64\00:27:30.71
to get them to their next level.
00:27:30.75\00:27:32.61
And so, you
know, if I can get out
00:27:32.65\00:27:34.68
and do workshops, seminars,
00:27:34.72\00:27:37.02
I do speaking engagements
and everything as well, so.
00:27:37.05\00:27:39.19
That's tremendous.
00:27:39.22\00:27:40.56
Well, thank you so
much for being with us.
00:27:40.59\00:27:42.52
We so appreciate you.
00:27:42.56\00:27:44.09
Love you dearly
00:27:44.13\00:27:45.46
and we support
what you're doing.
00:27:45.49\00:27:47.43
May God continue to bless you,
and thank you for joining us.
00:27:47.46\00:27:51.23
Join us next time
because you know what?
00:27:51.27\00:27:53.67
It just wouldn't be,
00:27:53.70\00:27:55.04
couldn't be the
same without you.
00:27:55.07\00:27:57.01