Have you ever
seen a walking miracle?
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Well, stay tuned to
hear the story of a woman
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who was delivered
from the grip of death.
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My name is Yvonne Lewis-Shelton,
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and you're
watching Urban Report.
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Hello and
welcome to Urban Report.
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My guest today
is Loretta Spivey,
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and her testimony is powerful.
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Welcome to
Urban Report, Loretta.
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Hi. Thank you.
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So glad that
you're here. I heard...
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Because you're already
on the 3ABN Today program,
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and I heard that your
testimony is so powerful.
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And so always when we have
a guest on the Today program
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that has a powerful testimony,
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we try to get you
on Urban Report too
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'cause our viewers
want to watch, and hear,
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and be blessed by it as well.
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So thank you so much
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for consenting to
be on this program.
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It's my pleasure.
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I believe that's why
God gave me the testimony
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because he knew
that I'd share it.
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Yes, and that's so important
because when something happens,
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if you don't share it,
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then how the people
know how God has blessed you.
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Absolutely.
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So let's hear
about what God has done.
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Well, I'll
start at the beginning
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and say that before I was
sick, I had never been sick.
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Other than having babies, I
had not been in the hospital.
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How many babies you have?
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Well, I have two by birth
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and three by
love, so I have five.
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Okay.
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I mean, not very many
of them are babies anymore
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but we will get to that.
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And so I was the
mother of five, four at home.
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And they were
doing piano, and soccer,
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and one was about to
graduate from high school,
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and one was in first grade,
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again that's a
story for another program
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how that happened.
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But we were just doing life.
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I was a runner,
10Ks, half marathons.
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I did mission trips,
I did church activities.
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And so, I think I would say
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that my life was
relatively normal,
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except for, let's show
that first baptism picture.
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And while
they're getting that up,
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let me just ask you, so
was your diet good even...
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You had the exercise
but how was your diet?
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Funny, you would
ask that question.
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My diet was excellent.
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Okay.
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My diet was
really, really solid.
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And so, I have no
reason to know why I got sick
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but something about diet,
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I hope that you'll remember
to ask me that a little later.
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Okay.
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But yeah, the
diet, the diet was really
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in very, very good shape.
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So you had a baptism photo...
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So, yeah, but
it's... There we go.
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And so that's in Ecuador,
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and the quick mission
trip story there is that,
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I promised I'd
never get in that river.
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Where was this?
That's in Ecuador.
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Ecuador! And we
camped near the river.
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And the kids, it
was ultimate workout
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and so we worked hard.
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The trip was for
14 to 18-year-olds.
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And so after work, they wanted
to go and play in the river,
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and I said, "I will gladly be
your chaperone from the bank."
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Right.
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I swim but I just didn't
want to go in that river.
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Right.
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I don't know what
was in that river.
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Right.
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But a young lady decided
that she wanted to get baptized.
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At first, I
thought it was a trick
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just to get me in the river,
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but she really wanted to
give her heart to the Lord,
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and so I got in the river.
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So this is what I
call "my normal life"
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before I got sick.
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So the sickness
crept up on me because...
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How many mothers aren't tired?
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Right.
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All mothers are tired.
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So the fact that I was tired
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didn't alarm me
so much at first.
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Was it an intense fatigue
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or just kind of
creeping upon you?
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Well, it was creeping up
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but it got so intense
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that the stairs
that I normally ran up,
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I had to rest half way through.
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And I thought, "I'm
resting half way through
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my regular flight of
stairs, something is wrong."
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My hands started feeling tingly
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but I have a little,
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as the old folk used to
say touch of carpal tunnel.
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And so I started
doing my B vitamins,
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trying to make
sure but it didn't help.
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Then my feet felt tingly.
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So I said to my best friend,
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"Listen, if I am still feeling
weakish and poorly tomorrow,
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I'm going to the doctor."
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When I woke up
tomorrow, my feet were tingly,
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my hands were tingly
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but what made me call the doctor
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was that my tongue was tingly.
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Through the
course of this interview,
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you'll learn
that I like to talk.
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So I could have
dealt with the hands,
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and I could have
dealt with the feet
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but we're gonna take care
of this tongue and make sure...
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Make sure that
you can still talk.
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Make sure that I can talk,
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and I thought
that's so strange so.
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Now were you having any
difficulty swallowing or...?
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No difficulty swallowing,
no difficulty talking.
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I had tingly feet, tongue,
and hands, and no energy.
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Okay. That's all I had.
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'Cause my mind is kind of...
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I'm a naturopathic
doctor, so my mind is kind of,
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you know, I'm
thinking of potential diagnosis
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but go ahead.
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Okay. So this will be good.
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Ask me about some
health things later on.
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So I go to the doctor,
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and miracle
number one takes place.
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I won't tell you
the name of it yet,
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but it's
extremely hard to diagnose.
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This doctor nailed it
in 15 minutes, 15 minutes.
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Wow.
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He nailed the diagnosis,
now that was the first miracle.
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Without any tests.
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Without any official tests.
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He tested, and he talked,
he asked me a lot of questions,
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he gave me the
neurological tests.
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Okay. And he diagnosed it.
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And so I did what
anybody would do in 2011.
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I picked up my
phone, and I typed it in.
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And then I said,
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"Okay, I should
probably put this down,"
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because the diagnosis
was Guillain-Barre syndrome,
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which is very, very rare.
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And the first words that jumped
out at me were intubation,
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paralysis, and death.
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So I said, "Oh,
yeah, I probably...
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Let's not, let's not..."
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Let's not go there.
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"Let's not go
there, let's just..."
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So I was there, I
was in the hospital,
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they were grateful
they caught it in time.
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Because a lot of times,
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people will end up
tripping and falling,
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and you know,
really hurting themselves,
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or having other symptoms,
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or just not
being able to breath,
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and so they felt
like they caught it early.
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I did treatment for a week.
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I did physical
therapy for another week,
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and they sent me home
with a walker and said,
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"Only use this as you have to,
as you feel like you need to."
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Now that had to,
kind of, blow you away too
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because here you are
a runner, an athlete,
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you know, just doing
what you normally do,
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and now you're coming
back home with a walker.
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But, you know,
I'm a little crazy.
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And so even though I was
coming home with a walker,
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from the
beginning, I was saying,
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"This is going to be
an amazing testimony,
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and this is going
to be a good story."
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I was really
saying that in my mind.
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Okay. Okay, okay.
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And after two weeks,
you know, "Hey, okay,
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I'll go home with a walker."
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That's what they told me
to convince me to take it home
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'cause I was like,
"I don't need a walker,
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I'm fine. I'm fine."
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They said, "No,
just take it, you know,
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if you're tired or whatever
the case maybe," so I took it.
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Now here's when the
problem really kicks in.
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The nature, the
personality, I like to say,
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of this syndrome
is that you go low
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and then you climb consistently
till you get better, right?
00:07:34.78\00:07:39.85
So...
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So you start
out at your worst...
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You start out, correct.
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And it
incrementally gets better.
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Yeah, right.
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You incrementally get
better and better and better.
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And so that's what
I went home expecting.
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So instead of that happening,
I started going the other way
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and getting worse.
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So the day I got home,
I told you I was bragging,
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"I don't need this walker."
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Well, two days
later, I needed the walker
00:08:03.88\00:08:06.08
just to get to my bathroom.
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Two days later? Two days later.
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It only took four days.
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By day four, you know,
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how you teach an
infant, not an infant,
00:08:14.16\00:08:16.46
a toddler to
slide down the stairs
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on their behind
so they don't fall,
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that's how I had
to go down the stairs,
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I couldn't walk down the stairs.
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I slid down the
stairs on my behind.
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When I got to the
bottom, my husband picked me up,
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and put me in the car,
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and took me back
to the emergency room.
00:08:29.80\00:08:32.11
They immediately admitted me,
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and started doing
tests all over again,
00:08:34.64\00:08:37.38
and they came to
the same diagnosis.
00:08:37.41\00:08:41.55
Although it took
them lots of blood
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and lots of other
tests to get there,
00:08:44.99\00:08:46.72
they said, "Yes,
it is Guillain-Barre
00:08:46.76\00:08:48.96
but we're gonna do something
little differently this time."
00:08:48.99\00:08:52.13
While they were figuring
out what they were going to do,
00:08:52.16\00:08:55.36
I went from
00:08:55.40\00:08:59.47
not being able to
go down the stairs,
00:08:59.50\00:09:00.94
as I mentioned,
00:09:00.97\00:09:02.30
needing the walker
to get to the bathroom
00:09:02.34\00:09:04.44
to not being
able to take two steps
00:09:04.47\00:09:06.84
to get to the
little portable potty
00:09:06.88\00:09:09.24
that they had in my room.
00:09:09.28\00:09:10.98
Were you so weak
00:09:11.01\00:09:12.61
that you couldn't
hold yourself up or...?
00:09:12.65\00:09:16.38
Yes.
00:09:16.42\00:09:17.75
I was just that weak.
00:09:17.79\00:09:19.12
My!
00:09:19.15\00:09:20.49
I was just that weak.
00:09:20.52\00:09:21.86
And so the decision was made
00:09:21.89\00:09:25.39
that I needed to go
to the bigger hospital.
00:09:25.43\00:09:29.30
I lived in a
little suburban town,
00:09:29.33\00:09:31.43
and so we were using
little small hospital.
00:09:31.47\00:09:34.14
And they said, "We need to
go to the big, main hospital."
00:09:34.17\00:09:38.34
Well, by the time they did
the paperwork, and of course,
00:09:38.37\00:09:40.78
checked the insurance,
00:09:40.81\00:09:42.51
and I got to the main hospital,
00:09:42.54\00:09:45.01
I walk in, and the doctor says,
"Loretta, good to meet you,"
00:09:45.05\00:09:50.02
you know, "give me a thumbs-up."
00:09:50.05\00:09:54.09
And literally, I literally
could not do that, literally.
00:09:54.12\00:10:00.23
So I'm just kind of
there, kind of, you know,
00:10:00.26\00:10:03.37
like I'm trying to start a
fire but not even that much,
00:10:03.40\00:10:05.90
I couldn't give him a thumbs-up.
00:10:05.93\00:10:07.77
This is on both sides,
both hands, you could not...
00:10:07.80\00:10:10.51
Both hands, both
sides, everything was...
00:10:10.54\00:10:12.91
That's the other
personality, it's not one sided
00:10:12.94\00:10:15.54
like a stroke or
something, it's all together.
00:10:15.58\00:10:18.48
And so that was
happening from the neck down.
00:10:18.51\00:10:22.92
So the neck down,
I have no control,
00:10:22.95\00:10:25.25
I can't scratch my
head, I can't feed myself.
00:10:25.29\00:10:28.46
So this is
similar to ALS, isn't it?
00:10:28.49\00:10:31.23
I'm not sure if it's
in that family but...
00:10:31.26\00:10:33.90
In a sense that you have
no control over your muscles.
00:10:33.93\00:10:37.77
Correct. Correct. You
can't walk, you can't...
00:10:37.80\00:10:40.70
Don't say I
can't talk. Praise God.
00:10:40.74\00:10:43.77
Praise Him. That's right.
00:10:43.81\00:10:45.17
That's right.
00:10:45.21\00:10:46.54
I mean, I keep saying
that but this was seriously
00:10:46.57\00:10:48.24
a blessing for a
number of reasons,
00:10:48.28\00:10:49.98
and one of them was that
00:10:50.01\00:10:52.45
I believe that we
never have an excuse
00:10:52.48\00:10:57.32
to be mean and nasty.
00:10:57.35\00:10:59.32
And if we
profess to be Christians,
00:10:59.35\00:11:01.32
then, not that
we have to be fake,
00:11:01.36\00:11:04.03
but we have to be
who we are all the time.
00:11:04.06\00:11:07.40
And so, again at this
point, though it's early,
00:11:07.43\00:11:10.57
and I'm still
thinking, "Oh, God, you know,
00:11:10.60\00:11:11.93
you're really
making this a good story.
00:11:11.97\00:11:13.47
I had no idea it was
going to be this good
00:11:13.50\00:11:14.84
but, okay, let's go with it."
00:11:14.87\00:11:16.54
And so I'm there,
and I told the doctor,
00:11:16.57\00:11:21.08
not even gesturing like this
because I couldn't, like this,
00:11:21.11\00:11:25.85
"I'm going to run a marathon."
00:11:25.88\00:11:27.65
Now I had never run a marathon
00:11:27.68\00:11:29.65
but I know the
man thinks I'm crazy
00:11:29.68\00:11:31.22
because I can't
even give him a thumbs-up
00:11:31.25\00:11:32.79
but I'm telling him I'm
going to run a marathon.
00:11:32.82\00:11:35.12
What did they say is the cause?
00:11:35.16\00:11:37.93
They couldn't
find the cause for me.
00:11:37.96\00:11:39.36
Some of the
causes they say are...
00:11:39.39\00:11:43.33
Well, let me say it this way,
if you listen to the warnings
00:11:43.37\00:11:47.34
after the flu shot commercial,
00:11:47.37\00:11:49.67
they'll say that
Guillain-Barre is a possibility.
00:11:49.70\00:11:54.71
The other thing
they say is stomach,
00:11:54.74\00:11:57.71
like people generally
get some kind of a bug,
00:11:57.75\00:12:00.85
and it's often a stomach virus,
00:12:00.88\00:12:03.02
and I suppose,
since it's autoimmune,
00:12:03.05\00:12:04.89
I suppose that
your autoimmune system
00:12:04.92\00:12:06.69
starts to fight that bug
and then kind of goes haywire.
00:12:06.72\00:12:10.43
And turns on itself.
00:12:10.46\00:12:11.79
And turns on, in my case,
it's peripheral nervous system.
00:12:11.83\00:12:15.03
And so they didn't really,
they could never figure it out.
00:12:15.06\00:12:17.30
People thought, "Oh,
it's all those mission trips,
00:12:17.33\00:12:18.83
you know, she's always in
another country, it's that."
00:12:18.87\00:12:21.24
But being infectious disease,
doctors took all of my blood,
00:12:21.27\00:12:24.61
all of it.
00:12:24.64\00:12:27.28
And they said,
00:12:27.31\00:12:28.78
"No, it didn't have anything
to do with the mission trips."
00:12:28.81\00:12:30.75
So for me, I don't
know, I do know people
00:12:30.78\00:12:33.11
who can point to a vaccine,
00:12:33.15\00:12:36.28
or a flu shot, or a
bug that happened before,
00:12:36.32\00:12:40.36
but for me, I
never knew anything
00:12:40.39\00:12:43.46
except that I was
tingly, and I was tired.
00:12:43.49\00:12:45.73
And funny, now I
say that I was paralyzed
00:12:45.76\00:12:48.53
but when it happened, I
never used that word, never.
00:12:48.56\00:12:52.13
What did you call it?
00:12:52.17\00:12:53.80
I didn't call it
anything, I just couldn't move.
00:12:53.84\00:12:57.27
And I want to say here that
00:12:57.31\00:12:59.37
even though I was calm
00:12:59.41\00:13:04.28
and I was in my
testimony mode, at night,
00:13:04.31\00:13:07.95
I would forget
'that I was paralyzed.
00:13:07.98\00:13:10.02
So in the daytime,
right, I knew like,
00:13:10.05\00:13:11.82
I know I need
somebody to feed me,
00:13:11.85\00:13:13.46
I know I need
somebody to scratch my head
00:13:13.49\00:13:15.76
and comb my hair, I know that
00:13:15.79\00:13:17.13
because I'm
conscious, it's daylight.
00:13:17.16\00:13:19.09
At nighttime, you know,
you're not paying attention.
00:13:19.13\00:13:21.50
And so I would be there at night
00:13:21.53\00:13:23.90
in neuro-ICU
which I never even knew.
00:13:23.93\00:13:26.03
The only NICU I
knew of was for babies
00:13:26.07\00:13:29.17
but here I am in neuro-ICU,
00:13:29.20\00:13:31.44
and you know, 2
o'clock in the morning,
00:13:31.47\00:13:33.64
I'd go just to
shift, just not a big thing,
00:13:33.68\00:13:37.11
just to shift a little bit,
00:13:37.15\00:13:38.98
and I'd
realized, I can't do that,
00:13:39.01\00:13:43.75
or just to scratch
my leg, or scratch,
00:13:43.79\00:13:45.75
and I couldn't do it.
00:13:45.79\00:13:47.12
And I'm telling you,
full blown panic attack.
00:13:47.16\00:13:49.42
Yes.
00:13:49.46\00:13:50.79
I've never had a panic,
I'm not given to panic attacks,
00:13:50.83\00:13:52.59
I'm not.
00:13:52.63\00:13:53.96
I've never had a
panic attack in my life
00:13:54.00\00:13:55.33
but I'm talking full blown,
00:13:55.36\00:13:57.23
hyperventilating,
feeling like I can't breathe,
00:13:57.27\00:13:59.73
feeling like I'm going
to die, feeling like...
00:13:59.77\00:14:01.67
Now if you know
anything about hospitals in ICU,
00:14:01.70\00:14:06.71
you're in that room by yourself,
00:14:06.74\00:14:08.84
they don't let your
family spend the night with you.
00:14:08.88\00:14:10.51
Right. It's
like 15-minute slots.
00:14:10.55\00:14:13.01
Fifteen-minute slots.
00:14:13.05\00:14:15.38
So now if I have
to go to the bathroom
00:14:15.42\00:14:18.12
and I'm in ICU, what happens?
00:14:18.15\00:14:22.16
You just go.
00:14:22.19\00:14:23.53
I can't push the button.
00:14:23.56\00:14:24.89
They give you
that button to push...
00:14:24.93\00:14:26.26
You can't even summon a nurse.
00:14:26.29\00:14:27.83
I can't even summon a nurse.
00:14:27.86\00:14:29.40
So I lay in the
bed and I say, "Jesus,
00:14:29.43\00:14:32.43
I need somebody
to come in this room,
00:14:32.47\00:14:34.30
and I can't call them."
00:14:34.34\00:14:36.00
So I'm going to need you
to send somebody in this room,
00:14:36.04\00:14:39.57
and somebody
will come in the room.
00:14:39.61\00:14:42.48
That really happened. Yes.
00:14:42.51\00:14:44.51
Also though, they were
willing to break the rule
00:14:44.55\00:14:48.08
because I could
not press the button.
00:14:48.12\00:14:49.65
They started allowing my husband
00:14:49.68\00:14:51.25
to come and
spend the night in ICU
00:14:51.29\00:14:53.19
which, as you well
know, doesn't happen.
00:14:53.22\00:14:56.42
So now this
poor guy is now there
00:14:56.46\00:14:59.09
to help manage
these panic attacks.
00:14:59.13\00:15:02.40
So he would just play music,
and pray, and rub my head,
00:15:02.43\00:15:06.40
and whatever the case
may be but in the daytime
00:15:06.43\00:15:09.27
because I was
aware, "Okay, I'm sick.
00:15:09.30\00:15:12.21
God is doing something.
00:15:12.24\00:15:13.58
It's going to be a testimony."
00:15:13.61\00:15:14.94
But at night I would just
wake up and just absolutely,
00:15:14.98\00:15:17.91
absolutely just
crazily freak out.
00:15:17.95\00:15:20.32
It's understandable
00:15:20.35\00:15:21.68
because you have no
control over anything.
00:15:21.72\00:15:26.39
Nothing.
00:15:26.42\00:15:27.76
So you can't, it's kind of like
being buried alive in a sense
00:15:27.79\00:15:31.06
because the only
thing you had was,
00:15:31.09\00:15:34.20
you were able to speak and look,
00:15:34.23\00:15:37.37
and that kind of thing
00:15:37.40\00:15:38.83
but you weren't
able to move anything.
00:15:38.87\00:15:41.40
That would send
anybody into a panic attack.
00:15:41.44\00:15:45.47
Right. Right.
00:15:45.51\00:15:47.24
It's just unfathomable.
00:15:47.28\00:15:49.28
So what would...
00:15:49.31\00:15:51.65
So your husband would
come, and he would play music,
00:15:51.68\00:15:54.15
and rub your
head, and just try to,
00:15:54.18\00:15:56.69
kind of calm you down
during those panic attacks.
00:15:56.72\00:16:00.42
Exactly.
00:16:00.46\00:16:02.02
And I, even then
I felt sorry for him
00:16:02.06\00:16:05.16
because he
didn't know what to do,
00:16:05.19\00:16:07.56
he's a corporate trainer.
00:16:07.60\00:16:09.46
He doesn't know
about these things.
00:16:09.50\00:16:12.00
I'd never been in
the hospital before,
00:16:12.03\00:16:13.84
he had never been
in the hospital before.
00:16:13.87\00:16:17.71
We just didn't have
experience in that and so...
00:16:17.74\00:16:22.14
And it came from nowhere.
00:16:22.18\00:16:23.65
It came from nowhere, nowhere.
00:16:23.68\00:16:25.88
It's not like you were sick,
00:16:25.91\00:16:28.52
you had a protracted illness
and then it came to this.
00:16:28.55\00:16:32.09
Correct. No. It
was four days. Bam!
00:16:32.12\00:16:35.12
It was days. It was days.
00:16:35.16\00:16:36.49
By the time I was
paralyzed, it was, so let's say,
00:16:36.52\00:16:39.43
two weeks in the hospital,
three or four days home,
00:16:39.46\00:16:42.63
another two days
in another hospital
00:16:42.66\00:16:44.53
so that's three weeks.
00:16:44.57\00:16:46.57
In three weeks, I was
from driving my kids to school
00:16:46.60\00:16:50.34
to not being able to
give a doctor a thumbs-up,
00:16:50.37\00:16:53.51
in three weeks time.
00:16:53.54\00:16:54.88
What was going on in
your head at this point?
00:16:54.91\00:16:57.58
This is going to be
an amazing testimony.
00:16:57.61\00:16:59.51
Still? Still.
00:16:59.55\00:17:00.88
You're still there. Still.
00:17:00.92\00:17:02.25
Okay. I was still there.
00:17:02.28\00:17:03.62
And I just want to say that
that has nothing to do with me
00:17:03.65\00:17:05.75
being awesome,
00:17:05.79\00:17:07.42
that has nothing to do with
me having a positive attitude,
00:17:07.46\00:17:09.59
that doesn't even
have anything to do with me
00:17:09.62\00:17:11.23
trying to be a witness.
00:17:11.26\00:17:12.83
That is the
thing that God did...
00:17:12.86\00:17:14.30
One of the things
that God did for me.
00:17:14.33\00:17:16.67
Throughout the entire
journey, He protected my mind.
00:17:16.70\00:17:21.00
It was almost as if, I
don't compare myself to Job
00:17:21.04\00:17:23.67
but for purposes of
this conversation, God said,
00:17:23.71\00:17:26.37
"You can have her
body but not her mind."
00:17:26.41\00:17:30.01
So I can point to
literally two or three times
00:17:30.05\00:17:33.15
during that journey
that I was really down,
00:17:33.18\00:17:35.75
and I'm talking
just a day or two
00:17:35.78\00:17:38.32
but He really protected my mind.
00:17:38.35\00:17:40.86
And so I don't want anyone
to think, "Oh, yeah, Loretta,
00:17:40.89\00:17:45.49
you know, she just had
that great relationship,
00:17:45.53\00:17:47.83
and she was so strong."
00:17:47.86\00:17:49.20
No, that is just
one of the things
00:17:49.23\00:17:51.07
that God did for
me, protected my mind.
00:17:51.10\00:17:53.34
That's beautiful.
00:17:53.37\00:17:54.70
Three months
in, three months in,
00:17:54.74\00:17:57.21
we actually had a
party in the hospital.
00:17:57.24\00:17:58.61
It was "Loretta's
been in the hospital
00:17:58.64\00:18:00.68
for three months,
00:18:00.71\00:18:02.04
and she hasn't
lost her mind party."
00:18:02.08\00:18:05.01
Seriously.
00:18:05.05\00:18:06.41
And my friends brought food,
and we laughed, and talked,
00:18:06.45\00:18:09.82
and testified to the
goodness of the Lord,
00:18:09.85\00:18:11.72
and we had a
little slide show as...
00:18:11.75\00:18:14.16
And you were
still incapacitated.
00:18:14.19\00:18:16.02
At that point, I
was in a wheelchair,
00:18:16.06\00:18:18.43
and I could talk,
00:18:18.46\00:18:19.79
and I could use my
hands a little bit,
00:18:19.83\00:18:21.16
I was in a power wheelchair
so I had a little joystick
00:18:21.20\00:18:23.53
and I could talk
always, praise the Lord.
00:18:23.57\00:18:27.10
And so, yeah, I remember,
00:18:27.14\00:18:32.04
it took me all day
to get dressed for it.
00:18:32.07\00:18:33.88
Literally, it took me all day.
00:18:33.91\00:18:35.48
And if you saw, I
don't have a picture of that,
00:18:35.51\00:18:37.28
but if you saw a
picture, you'd say
00:18:37.31\00:18:38.65
"It really took
you all day to do that?
00:18:38.68\00:18:40.75
It really took you
all day to do that?"
00:18:40.78\00:18:42.95
But it was good to just have
00:18:42.98\00:18:44.32
everyone around at the same time
00:18:44.35\00:18:45.72
and just have not hospital food
00:18:45.75\00:18:47.92
and celebrate
the goodness of God.
00:18:47.96\00:18:50.56
And I think we have a
video of you in that wheelchair.
00:18:50.59\00:18:54.96
We have a few videos.
00:18:55.00\00:18:56.87
We have a hospital picture
which would be great to show
00:18:56.90\00:18:59.63
because the hospital picture
looks so way different than...
00:18:59.67\00:19:05.07
yeah.
00:19:05.11\00:19:06.98
Way, way different than
what we're dealing with now.
00:19:07.01\00:19:10.75
So let's go on.
00:19:10.78\00:19:12.35
So we have this in the hospital,
00:19:12.38\00:19:13.72
and that was right
around the paralyzed time,
00:19:13.75\00:19:16.55
somebody actually put
my arm up there for me
00:19:16.58\00:19:18.82
so I could rest.
00:19:18.85\00:19:21.32
So I'm in the hospital,
and they do this treatment,
00:19:21.36\00:19:23.93
and they sent me to rehab.
00:19:23.96\00:19:25.63
And I'm telling you, I
use this word all the time,
00:19:25.66\00:19:28.00
I went to rehab like Rambo.
00:19:28.03\00:19:30.53
Whatever, literally,
while they were wheeling me,
00:19:30.57\00:19:32.80
and I was
talking to them saying,
00:19:32.83\00:19:34.17
"I'm going to be
your star patient.
00:19:34.20\00:19:36.37
I'm going to...
00:19:36.40\00:19:38.67
You tell me to do
five, I'm going to do seven."
00:19:38.71\00:19:40.74
I said, "I'm
going to be so amazing,
00:19:40.78\00:19:42.11
they will put my
picture on the wall."
00:19:42.14\00:19:44.75
That's how I went into
rehab because remember,
00:19:44.78\00:19:47.02
this is going to
be a great story.
00:19:47.05\00:19:49.95
And so now it's a
month, about a month then,
00:19:49.98\00:19:52.82
I'm in a rehab,
00:19:52.85\00:19:54.22
and I'm doing
exactly what I said.
00:19:54.26\00:19:57.13
The guy says, "Do
five," I squeeze out seven.
00:19:57.16\00:20:00.00
You know, the guy
says, "Go this high,"
00:20:00.03\00:20:01.56
I squeeze out a little higher.
00:20:01.60\00:20:02.93
I mean, I'm pushing this thing.
00:20:02.96\00:20:05.03
And then I start
feeling weak again,
00:20:05.07\00:20:09.20
and I say to them,
"Something's wrong.
00:20:09.24\00:20:10.71
I'm feeling weak again."
00:20:10.74\00:20:12.34
And they say,
00:20:12.37\00:20:14.24
"Oh, let's give a
little bit of time."
00:20:14.28\00:20:16.34
Well, that little bit of time
00:20:16.38\00:20:18.98
landed me
almost paralyzed again.
00:20:19.01\00:20:21.88
So now we go
back to the hospital,
00:20:21.92\00:20:23.95
and they say,
"Okay, we got this.
00:20:23.99\00:20:25.49
We're gonna just
tweak the treatment."
00:20:25.52\00:20:27.92
And that cycle
happened four times.
00:20:27.96\00:20:32.93
Where you would get treatment,
00:20:32.96\00:20:38.00
you get better,
00:20:38.03\00:20:39.77
but then you'd
hit a different place
00:20:39.80\00:20:41.80
in the treatment
and go backwards.
00:20:41.84\00:20:44.04
Correct.
00:20:44.07\00:20:45.41
You regressed. Correct.
00:20:45.44\00:20:46.78
And then you get
some more treatment,
00:20:46.81\00:20:49.94
build up a little bit,
and then regress again,
00:20:49.98\00:20:53.11
and that happened four times.
00:20:53.15\00:20:54.48
That happened four times. Wow.
00:20:54.52\00:20:56.08
So now, now my mind is
saying, "You know what,
00:20:56.12\00:21:00.82
you have to do
two things, Loretta.
00:21:00.86\00:21:03.29
You have to work,
like, it's all on you,
00:21:03.32\00:21:08.16
and you have to pray
like it's all on God."
00:21:08.20\00:21:11.47
Right.
00:21:11.50\00:21:12.83
So this is my mind now
like, "No one's going to say,
00:21:12.87\00:21:17.01
this didn't work out
00:21:17.04\00:21:19.84
because Loretta
didn't work hard enough."
00:21:19.87\00:21:22.14
You know, I was in
the physical therapy,
00:21:22.18\00:21:23.51
and I would hear people
00:21:23.55\00:21:24.88
who didn't want
to go to therapy,
00:21:24.91\00:21:26.25
and you know, the therapist
would try to coax them,
00:21:26.28\00:21:28.18
or they would say, "I don't know
00:21:28.22\00:21:29.55
what we're going to
do with such and such
00:21:29.58\00:21:30.92
because they're
just, they won't go."
00:21:30.95\00:21:32.29
And I just said
it in my mind like,
00:21:32.32\00:21:33.72
"I don't know
what's going to happen,
00:21:33.76\00:21:35.09
but it's not going to be
because I didn't do the work."
00:21:35.12\00:21:38.26
And so, there's a picture of
me doing a wheelchair workout
00:21:38.29\00:21:42.50
like I couldn't even
at that point stand up.
00:21:42.53\00:21:45.87
I think they have it.
00:21:45.90\00:21:47.24
And I was doing, you
know, these arm exercises,
00:21:47.27\00:21:50.81
and there it is
in the wheelchair.
00:21:50.84\00:21:52.94
And you can't hear the audio
00:21:52.97\00:21:54.31
but you'll see
me laugh in a minute
00:21:54.34\00:21:55.68
because that's like number three
00:21:55.71\00:21:57.38
right there, right?
00:21:57.41\00:21:58.75
And number four, like,
you see me when I smile.
00:21:58.78\00:22:00.12
My husband started counting
number one at that time.
00:22:00.15\00:22:01.98
Oh! Oh, my dude,
I already did four.
00:22:02.02\00:22:05.59
You can't leave
out anything. Yeah.
00:22:05.62\00:22:07.42
Don't...
00:22:07.46\00:22:08.79
'Cause I'm trying to do
extra now, you're already.
00:22:08.82\00:22:10.16
Yeah, right. Yeah.
00:22:10.19\00:22:11.53
And so, that was my theory like,
00:22:11.56\00:22:13.86
"I'm going to work like no one
else has any control over this,
00:22:13.90\00:22:16.77
and I'm going to pray,
00:22:16.80\00:22:18.13
and I need you guys to pray
00:22:18.17\00:22:19.50
like only God can do something."
00:22:19.53\00:22:21.57
And so that's
really the way that
00:22:21.60\00:22:23.67
I approached the whole thing.
00:22:23.71\00:22:26.24
But now, we just said
this cycle happened four times.
00:22:26.27\00:22:29.44
Right.
00:22:29.48\00:22:31.61
So I'm reading your
mind, and you're saying,
00:22:31.65\00:22:33.58
"What on earth
were you thinking now?"
00:22:33.62\00:22:36.25
I'm glad you asked.
00:22:36.28\00:22:39.75
So what I was
thinking was, "Okay..."
00:22:39.79\00:22:43.09
Oh, I left something out
really, really important.
00:22:43.12\00:22:46.23
When I was home for those
four days, God spoke to me,
00:22:46.26\00:22:50.27
as clearly as
I'm talking to you,
00:22:50.30\00:22:52.33
and He said,
"Loretta, this is not over
00:22:52.37\00:22:56.20
but you're going to be okay."
00:22:56.24\00:22:59.57
He told me that. Okay.
00:22:59.61\00:23:01.81
Loretta, how did
you react when...
00:23:01.84\00:23:04.58
But there are times when we know
00:23:04.61\00:23:06.45
that God is speaking to us.
00:23:06.48\00:23:08.05
There're other times were,
you know, is it me, is it Him?
00:23:08.08\00:23:10.85
But there are times
when you know that it is He,
00:23:10.89\00:23:15.09
what did you...
00:23:15.12\00:23:17.23
how did you react?
00:23:17.26\00:23:18.59
Did you cry?
00:23:18.63\00:23:19.96
How did you react
when He told you that?
00:23:20.00\00:23:22.46
I was really feeling
terribly at the time.
00:23:22.50\00:23:25.13
It was really
close to that fourth day,
00:23:25.17\00:23:26.74
and it might have
even been that fourth day,
00:23:26.77\00:23:28.37
and I was on my
behind going down the stairs.
00:23:28.40\00:23:30.21
So I remember being a
little startled at first.
00:23:30.24\00:23:35.44
Honestly, a little
disappointed at first
00:23:35.48\00:23:38.45
because I'm thinking like,
00:23:38.48\00:23:39.81
"Okay, two
weeks in the hospital,
00:23:39.85\00:23:41.32
that's the story."
00:23:41.35\00:23:43.69
So when He said that,
at the end of the day,
00:23:43.72\00:23:45.95
I was happy for the info
00:23:45.99\00:23:50.09
and a little
relieved because I could tell
00:23:50.13\00:23:52.19
we were going into something
that was pretty serious.
00:23:52.23\00:23:55.10
So I was relieved
to know. Okay. Good.
00:23:55.13\00:23:57.50
It's not over but
it's going to be okay.
00:23:57.53\00:24:00.04
Right.
00:24:00.07\00:24:01.40
But now honestly, by cycle four,
00:24:01.44\00:24:05.71
I'm starting to
wonder what is okay mean,
00:24:05.74\00:24:09.64
because you know,
00:24:09.68\00:24:11.15
God's words, and timing,
00:24:11.18\00:24:13.72
and calendars
aren't the same as ours.
00:24:13.75\00:24:15.28
Right.
00:24:15.32\00:24:16.65
So now I'm starting to
say, "Well, what exact...
00:24:16.69\00:24:18.72
Maybe I
misunderstood... Now I'm back.
00:24:18.75\00:24:20.19
Well, was it me? Was it who?
00:24:20.22\00:24:22.12
What did I really understand."
00:24:22.16\00:24:24.59
So I start asking God questions.
00:24:24.63\00:24:26.43
I started saying to God,
"Okay, what is okay mean?"
00:24:26.46\00:24:29.80
Because I thought okay
meant I was back to myself.
00:24:29.83\00:24:32.50
Right.
00:24:32.53\00:24:33.87
And now sometime during
the course of this thing,
00:24:33.90\00:24:35.24
I've decided that I don't
want to just get back to myself,
00:24:35.27\00:24:37.47
I want to get
better than I was before.
00:24:37.51\00:24:39.47
Okay.
00:24:39.51\00:24:40.84
And so I'm thinking,
00:24:40.88\00:24:42.21
"Well, what is
okay really mean?"
00:24:42.24\00:24:43.71
Do you know who
Joni Eareckson Tada is?
00:24:43.75\00:24:45.35
I do.
00:24:45.38\00:24:46.72
Okay, so I am
thinking, "Well, Joni's okay."
00:24:46.75\00:24:48.32
Well, tell our
viewers who she is.
00:24:48.35\00:24:49.95
Okay, so Joni Eareckson
Tada was the young lady
00:24:49.98\00:24:52.39
who was in a diving
accident as a teenager
00:24:52.42\00:24:56.83
and ended up paralyzed.
00:24:56.86\00:24:59.09
Quadriplegic.
00:24:59.13\00:25:00.46
As a quadriplegic
for the rest of her life
00:25:00.50\00:25:02.13
when she started
just as a teenager.
00:25:02.16\00:25:05.37
And so I thought, "Joni's okay."
00:25:05.40\00:25:07.30
And she has a
tremendous ministry too...
00:25:07.34\00:25:09.24
She has a tremendous
ministry. The disabled.
00:25:09.27\00:25:11.71
And honestly, I
even started to think...
00:25:11.74\00:25:14.98
'Cause I'm always going
to say a word for the Lord,
00:25:15.01\00:25:16.61
let's get that.
00:25:16.64\00:25:17.98
So I'm like, "When
I go to speak places,
00:25:18.01\00:25:20.12
am I going to have to ask them,
00:25:20.15\00:25:21.48
like to send
somebody strong enough
00:25:21.52\00:25:23.25
to deal with my wheelchair?
00:25:23.28\00:25:24.89
Am I going to have to ask them,
00:25:24.92\00:25:26.25
"Is their church
handicapped accessible?"
00:25:26.29\00:25:28.29
Like, what
exactly does okay mean?
00:25:28.32\00:25:31.56
And honestly, when people die,
00:25:31.59\00:25:35.20
we say, "They're resting."
00:25:35.23\00:25:37.63
We say, "They're out of pain.
00:25:37.67\00:25:40.30
They're okay." They're okay.
00:25:40.34\00:25:42.14
So I'm just starting
to question now exactly,
00:25:42.17\00:25:45.71
let's just go back here.
00:25:45.74\00:25:47.48
God, what do you mean by okay?
00:25:47.51\00:25:50.45
And, you know, what's
so great, Loretta, is that,
00:25:50.48\00:25:52.78
we can talk to God like that,
00:25:52.81\00:25:55.52
that we can approach Him
with those kinds of questions
00:25:55.55\00:25:59.49
because He's our Father.
00:25:59.52\00:26:01.52
If your Father is
trying to tell you something,
00:26:01.56\00:26:04.39
"Dad, what do you mean?
00:26:04.43\00:26:05.76
I'm not sure I
understand what you're saying?"
00:26:05.79\00:26:07.96
So He loves.
00:26:08.00\00:26:09.33
I think He loves
00:26:09.36\00:26:10.70
when we ask Him
questions like that
00:26:10.73\00:26:12.73
or ask Him to
clarify something, you know.
00:26:12.77\00:26:15.20
So you were saying, "Lord,
00:26:15.24\00:26:16.60
what do you mean,
what do you mean okay?"
00:26:16.64\00:26:19.54
Right. And so...
00:26:19.57\00:26:24.15
In pure God-fashion,
00:26:24.18\00:26:27.22
He says, "Now, I
have a question for you."
00:26:27.25\00:26:30.82
And I got little scared
00:26:30.85\00:26:33.62
because Job is one
of my favorite books.
00:26:33.66\00:26:36.83
And, you know, God had way
more than a question for Job
00:26:36.86\00:26:41.33
and I was just like, "Oh, man.
00:26:41.36\00:26:43.26
I'm in trouble now."
00:26:43.30\00:26:44.83
But He only had
one question for me,
00:26:44.87\00:26:47.37
and that question
was, "Do you trust Me?"
00:26:47.40\00:26:52.74
Wow!
00:26:52.77\00:26:55.01
Yeah.
00:26:55.04\00:26:56.38
It might well
have been 12 questions
00:26:56.41\00:26:58.15
'cause it was just
hard as 12 questions.
00:26:58.18\00:27:00.18
It just all came
only in one question.
00:27:00.22\00:27:04.45
And so I would like to tell you
00:27:04.49\00:27:07.39
because I have told you
that I did mission trips,
00:27:07.42\00:27:10.13
and I told you that
I was active in church,
00:27:10.16\00:27:13.53
and I told you that
00:27:13.56\00:27:14.90
I knew this is
going to be a testimony.
00:27:14.93\00:27:17.07
So this part in the story,
00:27:17.10\00:27:18.43
I would really like to tell you
00:27:18.47\00:27:19.80
that I said,
"Yes, God, absolutely.
00:27:19.83\00:27:22.04
I trust You."
00:27:22.07\00:27:25.14
And I think we all
generally trust God
00:27:25.17\00:27:30.25
but in this case,
00:27:30.28\00:27:33.21
I was getting a sense of
what the alternatives were.
00:27:33.25\00:27:38.49
See, when you're
in church or somewhere
00:27:38.52\00:27:41.12
and someone asks
a general question,
00:27:41.16\00:27:42.89
"Do you trust God?"
00:27:42.92\00:27:45.36
You say yes
because in your mind,
00:27:45.39\00:27:47.23
you're not thinking
of the alternatives.
00:27:47.26\00:27:50.73
Right?
00:27:50.77\00:27:52.10
But I was thinking,
"What is trust mean?
00:27:52.13\00:27:55.04
What is okay mean?
00:27:55.07\00:27:56.71
For me, this was supposed to end
00:27:56.74\00:27:59.41
with this great
testimony, right?
00:27:59.44\00:28:03.65
So when God said,
"Do you trust Me,"
00:28:03.68\00:28:05.71
my mind was thinking,
00:28:05.75\00:28:07.92
"Well, I want to trust You
to do what I want You to do."
00:28:07.95\00:28:12.05
Now over that...
00:28:15.32\00:28:16.83
Now you know,
that's a good point.
00:28:16.86\00:28:19.29
I want to...
that's why I trust You.
00:28:19.33\00:28:21.66
That is a good point.
00:28:21.70\00:28:25.07
We often trust God the way
to do what we want Him to do.
00:28:25.10\00:28:31.17
Correct, in our time.
Yeah, on our schedule.
00:28:31.21\00:28:33.91
On our schedule, in our way.
00:28:33.94\00:28:35.91
And so that is
what I was trusting.
00:28:35.94\00:28:39.38
I didn't want to just do that.
00:28:39.41\00:28:42.02
So it took me
about two weeks to pray,
00:28:42.05\00:28:46.92
to talk to certain people who
could handle this kind of talk.
00:28:46.96\00:28:51.86
Yes. Yes.
00:28:51.89\00:28:54.56
To think, to
really search myself,
00:28:54.60\00:28:58.80
to cry a
little, and to really...
00:28:58.83\00:29:01.94
'Cause, I mean,
God knows your heart.
00:29:01.97\00:29:03.30
Absolutely.
00:29:03.34\00:29:04.67
I didn't want to
say, "Oh, yes, God,
00:29:04.71\00:29:06.04
I trust You knowing full well."
00:29:06.07\00:29:08.31
I didn't.
00:29:08.34\00:29:09.68
And so after about two
weeks, I said, "Yes, God, I do.
00:29:09.71\00:29:16.48
I trust You." Okay.
00:29:16.52\00:29:19.35
Now, there is a
picture of my daughter
00:29:19.39\00:29:25.76
who was getting
ready to get married,
00:29:25.79\00:29:28.26
and me sitting down.
00:29:28.30\00:29:34.34
And if we could... Yeah.
00:29:34.37\00:29:37.67
All of my thoughts,
all of my healing like...
00:29:37.71\00:29:41.01
I know you have a
son, do you only have...
00:29:41.04\00:29:43.11
I have two sons. Okay.
00:29:43.14\00:29:44.95
So like a mother...
00:29:44.98\00:29:48.38
I have a daughter now too. Okay.
00:29:48.42\00:29:50.55
A mother and a
daughter's wedding...
00:29:50.59\00:29:52.75
Two daughters. Okay.
00:29:52.79\00:29:55.32
And I'm lying
up in the hospital.
00:29:55.36\00:29:58.46
So when I said,
"God, I trust You.
00:29:58.49\00:30:01.80
Like I'm thinking, I trust You
00:30:01.83\00:30:03.33
but I need You to get me
up to be at this wedding."
00:30:03.37\00:30:06.80
Right.
00:30:06.84\00:30:08.17
And because I am who I am,
00:30:08.20\00:30:10.01
I don't want to
be just be there,
00:30:10.04\00:30:11.37
I want to walk down the aisle.
00:30:11.41\00:30:12.74
Right. Right.
00:30:12.77\00:30:14.11
So all of this physical therapy,
00:30:14.14\00:30:15.48
all of this, "Okay.
00:30:15.51\00:30:16.98
So yes, God, I trust You."
00:30:17.01\00:30:18.75
How far away was the
wedding to this question,
00:30:18.78\00:30:23.08
from the question?
00:30:23.12\00:30:24.45
To the question,
from the question,
00:30:24.49\00:30:25.82
I'm going to say the
question was February
00:30:25.85\00:30:27.42
and the wedding was May.
00:30:27.46\00:30:28.79
Okay. Okay.
00:30:28.82\00:30:30.16
So all the preparation is,
you know, things are happening.
00:30:30.19\00:30:32.99
Right. Absolutely.
00:30:33.03\00:30:34.43
So I said, "Yes,
God, I trust You."
00:30:34.46\00:30:37.37
In a little true confession,
there was a part of me
00:30:37.40\00:30:42.20
that felt like this
story was a lifetime movie.
00:30:42.24\00:30:45.97
And really, sometime I
would wake up saying, okay,
00:30:46.01\00:30:47.98
I'd look around like, "Okay,
I'm just expecting the director
00:30:48.01\00:30:50.15
any moment to say, 'Cut.
00:30:50.18\00:30:52.45
Go to commercial.'"
00:30:52.48\00:30:53.82
You know, we come back,
00:30:53.85\00:30:55.18
and I'll be my
regular healthy self again.
00:30:55.22\00:30:56.58
Yeah.
00:30:56.62\00:30:57.95
So when I said,
"Yes, God, I trust You."
00:30:57.99\00:31:00.96
There was a part
of me that believed
00:31:00.99\00:31:03.06
that God wanted full
surrender, it's Abraham.
00:31:03.09\00:31:05.56
I'm going through all
the people in the Bible,
00:31:05.59\00:31:06.96
now I'm Abraham, right?
00:31:07.00\00:31:09.06
And, you know,
Abraham was willing,
00:31:09.10\00:31:11.77
and God, you know,
said, "Don't do it,"
00:31:11.80\00:31:15.60
and the story ended fantastic.
00:31:15.64\00:31:17.17
So there was really
a part of me that felt,
00:31:17.21\00:31:19.34
even though I struggled,
00:31:19.37\00:31:20.71
I didn't say it
haphazardly or flippantly,
00:31:20.74\00:31:23.65
even though I struggled,
00:31:23.68\00:31:25.01
and I feel like I
really surrendered,
00:31:25.05\00:31:27.25
what was supposed to happen then
00:31:27.28\00:31:30.25
was, I was supposed
to be healed, right?
00:31:30.29\00:31:33.39
"Yes, God, I trust
You. I give You my all.
00:31:33.42\00:31:35.36
In Jesus' name, amen."
00:31:35.39\00:31:37.13
Take up your bed and walk, like,
00:31:37.16\00:31:38.49
that's the way it
was supposed to happen,
00:31:38.53\00:31:40.40
but that's not what happened.
00:31:40.43\00:31:41.96
What happened was that all
the doctors came in the room.
00:31:42.00\00:31:45.67
Now, you know
when they all come.
00:31:45.70\00:31:47.14
Yeah.
00:31:47.17\00:31:49.24
It's either bad
news or great news.
00:31:49.27\00:31:51.14
No. They never all
come when it's good news.
00:31:51.17\00:31:52.94
Well, the reason
why I said that is
00:31:52.97\00:31:54.71
because, you know, like you
have the professor, teachers,
00:31:54.74\00:31:58.18
if it's a teaching hospital.
00:31:58.21\00:31:59.55
It was.
00:31:59.58\00:32:00.92
And they come to say,
"Look at what's happened."
00:32:00.95\00:32:04.92
So it can be but... Okay.
00:32:04.95\00:32:07.36
But in this case, it was not.
00:32:07.39\00:32:08.72
My experience is, they didn't
have anything good to say.
00:32:08.76\00:32:12.03
So they came in,
00:32:12.06\00:32:13.50
and my reward for surrendering
00:32:13.53\00:32:20.10
and submitting fully
00:32:20.14\00:32:21.47
and telling God
that I trusted Him
00:32:21.50\00:32:23.17
was that they
had a new diagnosis.
00:32:23.20\00:32:26.94
And the name of
the doing diagnosis,
00:32:26.98\00:32:29.54
nobody knows what
it is, it's so rare,
00:32:29.58\00:32:31.35
but the first word is chronic.
00:32:31.38\00:32:33.28
Which that, in and of itself...
00:32:36.65\00:32:40.66
I think you'd
probably get stuck right there.
00:32:40.69\00:32:43.06
The first word was
chronic. First word, yeah.
00:32:43.09\00:32:44.99
And I didn't know what
00:32:45.03\00:32:46.83
chronic inflammatory
demyelinating polyneuropathy,
00:32:46.86\00:32:49.73
so I didn't know...
00:32:49.76\00:32:51.10
You know, even
once they said it,
00:32:51.13\00:32:52.47
I had no idea what it meant.
00:32:52.50\00:32:53.84
Yeah, yeah.
00:32:53.87\00:32:55.20
But, because the
first word was chronic,
00:32:55.24\00:32:56.67
I knew that it
wasn't a good situation.
00:32:56.71\00:33:01.11
While they were there,
they thought to tell me
00:33:01.14\00:33:03.04
that we should
take this time now
00:33:03.08\00:33:06.05
to go ahead and
start getting you
00:33:06.08\00:33:07.92
prepared for...
00:33:07.95\00:33:10.19
living in this state.
00:33:10.22\00:33:15.22
So, "We have some people
00:33:15.26\00:33:16.59
that we want you to talk with
about getting your home set up
00:33:16.62\00:33:21.43
so you can have ramps
00:33:21.46\00:33:23.57
and whatever else you
need to be handicap-accessible.
00:33:23.60\00:33:28.67
And we have someone else that
you can talk to about your car,
00:33:28.70\00:33:32.51
and we have this,"
this part is funny.
00:33:32.54\00:33:35.14
There was a psychiatrist
there who was in a wheelchair,
00:33:35.18\00:33:39.58
who really had an amazing life.
00:33:39.61\00:33:40.95
I mean, he played basketball,
00:33:40.98\00:33:42.32
he drove this little sports car.
00:33:42.35\00:33:43.89
I'm not sure if
he was married or not
00:33:43.92\00:33:45.25
but he was
really like a cool guy.
00:33:45.29\00:33:47.72
I avoided this
guy like the plague
00:33:47.76\00:33:50.09
because honestly, I did
not want him explaining to me
00:33:50.13\00:33:55.66
how to live well
like he was living well.
00:33:55.70\00:33:58.73
I did not.
00:33:58.77\00:34:00.40
'Cause you didn't
want to live like that.
00:34:00.44\00:34:02.77
And the only way I was
willing to live like that
00:34:02.80\00:34:04.81
is if God Himself...
00:34:04.84\00:34:06.17
I said, "God, You're
gonna have to tell me
00:34:06.21\00:34:07.94
'cause these
people think I'm crazy."
00:34:07.98\00:34:09.88
They really.
00:34:09.91\00:34:11.25
And the more I ignored him,
00:34:11.28\00:34:13.01
and the more I
wouldn't talk to the people,
00:34:13.05\00:34:14.95
and the more I
wouldn't read the pamphlets,
00:34:14.98\00:34:16.45
they just kept piling
up, I threw them away once.
00:34:16.48\00:34:21.02
The more they thought,
"This woman's in denial.
00:34:21.06\00:34:22.86
We really need to
get her some counseling."
00:34:22.89\00:34:24.23
So I say to my husband,
00:34:24.26\00:34:25.59
"Listen, you're going
to have to talk to them.
00:34:25.63\00:34:27.66
I can't do it."
00:34:27.70\00:34:29.03
And when I say, "I can't do it,"
00:34:29.06\00:34:30.53
I don't mean like,
there's a saying now like,
00:34:30.57\00:34:32.20
"I can't. I just
can't." I didn't mean like that.
00:34:32.23\00:34:33.84
I mean, I literally could not.
00:34:33.87\00:34:36.37
I, thought of mine, have
very black and white thinking.
00:34:36.40\00:34:40.41
So I couldn't figure out
00:34:40.44\00:34:41.78
how to be believing
God for healing over here
00:34:41.81\00:34:45.05
and preparing myself to
not be healed over here.
00:34:45.08\00:34:50.32
So it felt like a
contradiction of faith.
00:34:50.35\00:34:52.55
It was a contradiction for me.
00:34:52.59\00:34:54.09
Because how can I
say, "Lord, I trust You,"
00:34:54.12\00:34:58.59
and then I'm preparing to
be paralyzed rest of my life.
00:34:58.63\00:35:01.60
I got you.
00:35:01.63\00:35:02.96
So I literally, I tried to do it
00:35:03.00\00:35:06.03
because I tried most of the time
00:35:06.07\00:35:08.00
to be a good patient.
00:35:08.04\00:35:09.60
And so I really tried,
and it gave me a headache.
00:35:09.64\00:35:14.04
I could not figure out
how to be over here saying,
00:35:14.08\00:35:17.28
"I'm praying.
00:35:17.31\00:35:18.65
I believe in God
is going to heal me.
00:35:18.68\00:35:20.02
I believe this is
going to be a great story.
00:35:20.05\00:35:21.42
Oh, let me get ready
to get my house ready
00:35:21.45\00:35:23.95
to be handicapped forever."
00:35:23.99\00:35:26.76
God bless the
person who could do that.
00:35:26.79\00:35:28.32
This brain...
00:35:28.36\00:35:30.63
So I said to my husband,
00:35:30.66\00:35:31.99
"You're going to
have to talk to them."
00:35:32.03\00:35:33.43
And he was like,
"No, I am not talking."
00:35:33.46\00:35:36.63
He was like, "I'm with you."
00:35:36.67\00:35:38.67
You know, if this
is what we're doing,
00:35:38.70\00:35:40.04
then we're doing it.
00:35:40.07\00:35:41.40
And so, now I have my husband
00:35:41.44\00:35:42.90
and myself not
talking to these people,
00:35:42.94\00:35:46.04
not paying
attention, not taught,
00:35:46.07\00:35:48.68
not reading the pamphlets...
00:35:48.71\00:35:50.78
Just not investing yourself
on any level in that area.
00:35:50.81\00:35:52.88
On any level.
00:35:52.91\00:35:55.58
Here, there is
a special meeting,
00:35:55.62\00:35:56.95
we have the people coming
in, and everybody is wheeling,
00:35:56.99\00:36:00.46
and I'm like, "I'm
not going down there."
00:36:00.49\00:36:04.03
Why I'm not going down there?
00:36:04.06\00:36:05.73
And so it was really a
problem for the medical people
00:36:05.76\00:36:08.40
but it wasn't a
problem for me at all.
00:36:08.43\00:36:09.76
I felt a sense of
relief once I just said,
00:36:09.80\00:36:12.90
"I can't do
both of these things,
00:36:12.93\00:36:14.57
and this is the one
00:36:14.60\00:36:15.94
I'm choosing to
focus on right now."
00:36:15.97\00:36:17.81
And so that's what I did.
00:36:17.84\00:36:19.41
What kind of
support did you have?
00:36:19.44\00:36:21.24
Did you have support
from your pastor, your church,
00:36:21.28\00:36:23.78
your church
members during this time?
00:36:23.81\00:36:26.08
Let me tell you something.
00:36:26.11\00:36:28.02
When people ask me
why I didn't go crazy,
00:36:28.05\00:36:29.85
there are two
reasons I didn't go crazy.
00:36:29.88\00:36:31.59
One of them, I told you,
00:36:31.62\00:36:32.95
is because God
just protected my mind,
00:36:32.99\00:36:34.42
but the other thing is,
I had unbelievable support.
00:36:34.46\00:36:39.29
Now, you know,
people stop visiting...
00:36:39.33\00:36:41.43
You know, when
you're in the hospital like,
00:36:41.46\00:36:42.80
people stop...
00:36:42.83\00:36:44.17
two or three
weeks and that's it.
00:36:44.20\00:36:45.53
Yeah. Six months.
00:36:45.57\00:36:47.64
Six months, I was
in somebody's facility.
00:36:47.67\00:36:51.47
For six months? Six months.
00:36:51.51\00:36:53.61
Now, you know, they put...
00:36:53.64\00:36:54.98
You have brain surgery,
00:36:55.01\00:36:56.34
and they send you home
in three days nowadays.
00:36:56.38\00:36:57.71
It's true. That's true.
00:36:57.75\00:36:59.11
They switch you
open and cut your heart
00:36:59.15\00:37:00.82
and, you know,
they send you home.
00:37:00.85\00:37:02.65
So six months, I was
in somebody's facility.
00:37:02.68\00:37:05.69
And the support was so
amazing like, one time,
00:37:05.72\00:37:10.49
one of my down days, I
sent a poem to a friend of mine.
00:37:10.53\00:37:14.66
And the poem, I don't
remember the name of it
00:37:14.70\00:37:17.43
but the line was, "I want
to let go but I won't let go."
00:37:17.47\00:37:22.14
It had that refrain a lot.
00:37:22.17\00:37:23.64
And I sent that poem,
I'm not gonna make it up,
00:37:23.67\00:37:25.81
I say at 1 o'clock.
00:37:25.84\00:37:27.41
At 3 o'clock, her husband,
00:37:27.44\00:37:28.78
the pastor was
sitting in my room.
00:37:28.81\00:37:31.78
I mean, I had so much...
00:37:31.81\00:37:33.75
My husband...
00:37:33.78\00:37:35.68
And talk about being a
silent witness because...
00:37:35.72\00:37:40.76
My husband's an
elder, he's been first elder,
00:37:40.79\00:37:42.56
I was an elder
00:37:42.59\00:37:43.93
and so, and we just
kind of tell our kids things.
00:37:43.96\00:37:47.60
So they go to the hospital,
00:37:47.63\00:37:50.37
my kids spent the night
in the hospital, literally.
00:37:50.40\00:37:53.44
I can't tell you how many times
00:37:53.47\00:37:54.80
I had to watch
Chronicles of Narnia
00:37:54.84\00:37:56.81
because they brought a projector
00:37:56.84\00:37:58.61
and projected it on the
wall, and they spent the night.
00:37:58.64\00:38:03.08
And my friends, I guess
they called it being normal
00:38:03.11\00:38:07.22
but my friends took my food,
00:38:07.25\00:38:09.22
like I finally
get some French fries,
00:38:09.25\00:38:10.99
and, you know, you don't get
French fries in the hospital,
00:38:11.02\00:38:12.79
and I turned around,
00:38:12.82\00:38:14.16
and like they'd
be eating my food.
00:38:14.19\00:38:15.52
"Yes, you know who you are."
00:38:15.56\00:38:18.46
But I really had...
00:38:18.49\00:38:19.83
My best friend was working,
00:38:19.86\00:38:21.56
living in one state
and working in California,
00:38:21.60\00:38:24.70
and I looked up,
and she was there.
00:38:24.73\00:38:28.00
My oldest daughter who was
getting ready to get married,
00:38:28.04\00:38:30.04
as I've said, stopped
her life and came down,
00:38:30.07\00:38:34.64
you know, 500, 600 miles
00:38:34.68\00:38:36.31
and, you know,
managed her siblings,
00:38:36.34\00:38:38.45
and took everybody
to school and work.
00:38:38.48\00:38:39.95
My sister and my
other sister-in-law,
00:38:39.98\00:38:42.25
my mother-in-law,
so I really had...
00:38:42.28\00:38:44.75
And the hospital noticed.
00:38:44.79\00:38:46.79
They said, "You
have amazing support,"
00:38:46.82\00:38:48.69
and then they would
tell me stories of husbands
00:38:48.72\00:38:50.23
who would leave, wife would
get in a terrible car accident,
00:38:50.26\00:38:52.73
and she's gonna be
paralyzed for life,
00:38:52.76\00:38:54.10
or she's going
to be handicapped.
00:38:54.13\00:38:55.46
And husband
would come to the rehab
00:38:55.50\00:38:56.83
or call her in the
rehab, and say, "I'm done.
00:38:56.87\00:38:58.20
I can't do it."
00:38:58.23\00:39:00.44
And so for them to see,
you know, my family there,
00:39:00.47\00:39:03.41
my husband set up camp. I
mean, he's got a computer,
00:39:03.44\00:39:05.64
he's got papers
all over the place.
00:39:05.67\00:39:07.34
You know, I'm like,
"Can I get space of that,
00:39:07.38\00:39:08.91
a little spot of
that for my meal?"
00:39:08.94\00:39:11.38
I mean, and so I had amazing...
00:39:11.41\00:39:15.02
I mean, God just really
surrounded me with people
00:39:15.05\00:39:17.85
that were just positive.
00:39:17.89\00:39:19.39
One lady from my
church would just...
00:39:19.42\00:39:20.76
You know, I had lentils and rice
00:39:20.79\00:39:22.12
and, you know, good food.
00:39:22.16\00:39:23.49
Yes.
00:39:23.53\00:39:24.86
I was really, really blessed.
00:39:24.89\00:39:26.23
I have pictures of my
kids sleeping in my bed,
00:39:26.26\00:39:27.60
and I'm in the wheelchair.
00:39:27.63\00:39:28.96
Yeah. Yeah.
00:39:29.00\00:39:30.33
So really, really
blessed in that sense.
00:39:30.37\00:39:32.23
Praise the Lord.
Yeah, very blessed.
00:39:32.27\00:39:33.74
So at this point now,
00:39:33.77\00:39:38.01
you're not investing
yourself in any of the,
00:39:38.04\00:39:42.41
'I'm going to be paralyzed
the rest of my life, rhetoric.'
00:39:42.44\00:39:47.62
No.
00:39:47.65\00:39:48.98
That's out. Way out.
00:39:49.02\00:39:50.35
So what turned things around?
00:39:50.39\00:39:53.09
How did God turn this around?
00:39:53.12\00:39:56.49
So before I get exactly to that,
00:40:00.10\00:40:04.03
there's just one
little gap we have to fill in.
00:40:04.07\00:40:05.97
Okay. I started getting better.
00:40:06.00\00:40:10.17
And I was well
enough and stable enough.
00:40:10.21\00:40:14.61
This is a quiz question for you,
00:40:14.64\00:40:16.24
to not be in the hospital
00:40:16.28\00:40:18.28
but not well
enough to be at home,
00:40:18.31\00:40:20.88
so what happens?
00:40:20.92\00:40:22.25
Rehab or something.
00:40:22.28\00:40:23.82
One of those interim places.
00:40:23.85\00:40:25.75
Well, you can call
it an interim place,
00:40:25.79\00:40:27.16
it was a nursing home.
00:40:27.19\00:40:28.52
Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
00:40:28.56\00:40:32.79
So now let's recap.
00:40:32.83\00:40:34.76
I have five
children, I'm healthy,
00:40:34.80\00:40:37.57
I'm doing mission
trips. I'm a runner.
00:40:37.60\00:40:40.74
In my mind, this
is not where I fit.
00:40:40.77\00:40:43.57
Right.
00:40:43.61\00:40:44.94
Right, I don't fit here.
00:40:44.97\00:40:46.31
Right.
00:40:46.34\00:40:47.91
But I couldn't go home.
00:40:47.94\00:40:50.51
I was not ready to be at home,
00:40:50.55\00:40:52.31
and so they sent
me to this place.
00:40:52.35\00:40:55.08
And, you know,
everybody kind of says,
00:40:55.12\00:40:59.25
you know, you don't get
the best rehab and those.
00:40:59.29\00:41:00.82
I mean, I was in
the top rehab place.
00:41:00.86\00:41:02.19
I was in a place
00:41:02.22\00:41:03.56
that people come from
all over the United States.
00:41:03.59\00:41:05.03
There were even people
there from England, and Germany,
00:41:05.06\00:41:07.50
and top rehab place.
00:41:07.53\00:41:09.90
And so now I'm
going to a nursing home,
00:41:09.93\00:41:11.73
and everybody's
thinking, "Oh, this is terrible.
00:41:11.77\00:41:14.07
You know, she's not going to...
00:41:14.10\00:41:15.74
If she couldn't walk
there, what's going to happen?"
00:41:15.77\00:41:19.01
But somebody forgot to tell,
00:41:19.04\00:41:20.54
one of my main
physical therapist was Mary.
00:41:20.58\00:41:23.55
Somebody forgot to tell her
00:41:23.58\00:41:25.28
that rehab in her
place wasn't good.
00:41:25.31\00:41:28.48
She didn't get the memo.
00:41:28.52\00:41:30.39
And so she said, "I know about
that place where you were."
00:41:30.42\00:41:34.06
She said, "They
have all the bells..."
00:41:34.09\00:41:35.42
And she said, "Let
me tell you something.
00:41:35.46\00:41:36.79
There's no bells
and there's no whistles.
00:41:36.83\00:41:38.16
You're going to walk
00:41:38.19\00:41:39.53
because we are going
to get you strong enough
00:41:39.56\00:41:40.90
to walk just like a
baby on your knees."
00:41:40.93\00:41:44.53
And I couldn't even
balance on all fours,
00:41:44.57\00:41:46.23
like that's how I
couldn't even balance on.
00:41:46.27\00:41:48.57
So a physical therapy session
00:41:48.60\00:41:49.94
would be me trying
to balance on all fours.
00:41:49.97\00:41:52.64
Right.
00:41:52.67\00:41:54.01
Now this is deep into
this, this is deep now.
00:41:54.04\00:41:56.64
I mean, now
we're getting ready to,
00:41:56.68\00:41:58.51
if you want to call it, a walk.
00:41:58.55\00:42:01.95
And, you know, you'll
see that all of the pressure
00:42:01.98\00:42:05.45
is on my arms but...
00:42:05.49\00:42:11.23
You actually had to
learn to walk again.
00:42:11.26\00:42:14.10
No. I actually had to
learn to walk five times.
00:42:14.13\00:42:17.57
Every time back and
forth, I learned to walk,
00:42:17.60\00:42:20.57
and then went back,
and then learn to walk,
00:42:20.60\00:42:22.44
and then went back.
00:42:22.47\00:42:23.81
So this is...
00:42:23.84\00:42:25.17
No, this is time number,
00:42:25.21\00:42:27.61
I guess we'll call it
number four of learning to walk.
00:42:27.64\00:42:33.21
Did you ever reach a
point where you said,
00:42:33.25\00:42:37.99
"I just can't do this anymore.
00:42:38.02\00:42:40.06
This is just too much for me"?
00:42:40.09\00:42:42.26
Did you ever reached
that place of just deep,
00:42:42.29\00:42:46.49
deep discouragement?
00:42:46.53\00:42:48.23
I got tired,
and I got frustrated
00:42:48.26\00:42:52.67
but it was always going
to be a story, you know.
00:42:52.70\00:42:56.37
And remember,
the bigger thing is,
00:42:56.40\00:42:59.67
I told you, if God said
you're not going to walk,
00:42:59.71\00:43:02.94
then you're not going to walk.
00:43:02.98\00:43:04.31
But I wasn't
listening to anyone.
00:43:04.35\00:43:05.68
I mean, I was like a kid.
00:43:05.71\00:43:07.05
I mean, I was really not
listening to anyone else.
00:43:07.08\00:43:10.09
And I told you,
00:43:10.12\00:43:11.75
no one's going to say it
didn't happen because of me.
00:43:11.79\00:43:14.62
So I was focused on
doing what I needed to do.
00:43:14.66\00:43:18.16
I was focused on
doing my exercises,
00:43:18.19\00:43:19.96
I was focused on doing
that walk, I was focused on,
00:43:20.00\00:43:23.47
it's hard to eat
well in the hospital,
00:43:23.50\00:43:25.13
but at one point,
00:43:25.17\00:43:26.50
like my husband was making me
beet juice, and spinach juice,
00:43:26.53\00:43:28.94
and carrot
juice, and bring it in.
00:43:28.97\00:43:30.94
I convinced one of my
occupational therapist
00:43:30.97\00:43:33.88
to let me make smoothies
00:43:33.91\00:43:35.54
as part of my
occupational therapy.
00:43:35.58\00:43:37.65
So we brought in
my vitamix, seriously,
00:43:37.68\00:43:39.71
put it in the
cabinet, and she would...
00:43:39.75\00:43:42.08
We'd go down the hall,
00:43:42.12\00:43:43.45
and we go into a
little kitchen area,
00:43:43.49\00:43:45.09
and my therapy would
be going into the freezer,
00:43:45.12\00:43:47.42
taken out the fruit.
00:43:47.46\00:43:49.99
Right.
00:43:50.03\00:43:51.36
Going to the refrigerator,
taking out the juice and stuff,
00:43:51.39\00:43:53.96
putting it in the vitamix.
00:43:54.00\00:43:55.33
You know, it's... Yeah.
00:43:55.36\00:43:56.70
That's good. Yeah.
00:43:56.73\00:43:58.07
Putting in the
vitamix, closing it up,
00:43:58.10\00:43:59.80
they allowed
that to be my therapy.
00:43:59.83\00:44:01.37
It got to the point
where the nurses would say,
00:44:01.40\00:44:02.90
"Hey, can you
make a little extra?
00:44:02.94\00:44:06.07
Can you make some extra?"
00:44:06.11\00:44:07.98
And so there were times
like that, I want to let go.
00:44:08.01\00:44:12.41
There were times
that I couldn't pray.
00:44:12.45\00:44:14.45
I wasn't mad, I just
didn't know what to say,
00:44:14.48\00:44:17.09
like I'm out of words like...
00:44:17.12\00:44:20.52
Prayer ministry is so important.
00:44:20.56\00:44:24.16
I just literally
could not pray for myself.
00:44:24.19\00:44:28.46
I had said it all.
00:44:28.50\00:44:29.83
I just didn't know what to say.
00:44:29.86\00:44:31.20
I wasn't mad at
God. I wasn't upset.
00:44:31.23\00:44:34.04
I just didn't
know what else to...
00:44:34.07\00:44:36.17
It had all been said.
00:44:36.20\00:44:39.37
So I was so grateful
that there were people.
00:44:39.41\00:44:42.58
I mean, storming the
gates of heaven in my behalf.
00:44:42.61\00:44:46.68
They are still stars to me.
00:44:46.72\00:44:48.68
They are, like,
every time I see them,
00:44:48.72\00:44:51.69
I just hug them big,
00:44:51.72\00:44:53.19
and I mean, if I could
give them a million dollars...
00:44:53.22\00:44:56.49
because I
couldn't pray for myself,
00:44:56.52\00:44:58.29
and they stood in the
gap and made sure that.
00:44:58.33\00:45:00.53
So, yeah, I had amazing support,
00:45:00.56\00:45:02.46
and that's
probably another reason
00:45:02.50\00:45:03.83
that my mind never went to
the depths of discouragement
00:45:03.87\00:45:07.10
that it could.
00:45:07.14\00:45:08.94
But again, I want to be clear,
this is not about me, God,
00:45:08.97\00:45:11.57
that's the one area
that God just protected.
00:45:11.61\00:45:14.88
So now, I'm in the nursing home,
00:45:14.91\00:45:16.34
and good news,
bad news, I go home,
00:45:16.38\00:45:20.35
in a wheelchair,
not able to walk.
00:45:20.38\00:45:24.32
This is definitely not...
00:45:24.35\00:45:25.75
Now my daughter is about
to graduate from high school.
00:45:25.79\00:45:30.13
So now, you have the wedding
coming up and the graduation.
00:45:30.16\00:45:32.03
I had the wedding coming up,
00:45:32.06\00:45:33.96
I have the graduation coming up.
00:45:34.00\00:45:35.60
My little one is just
finishing up first grade.
00:45:35.63\00:45:38.43
Everybody has something big.
00:45:38.47\00:45:39.80
And I'm just like,
00:45:39.83\00:45:41.17
"God, I am going home to
be a burden on my family."
00:45:41.20\00:45:44.61
You know, it's the
woman thing now, right?
00:45:44.64\00:45:45.97
Yeah, yeah.
00:45:46.01\00:45:47.34
I'm not being productive,
I'm not being a good wife,
00:45:47.38\00:45:48.94
I'm not being a good mother,
I'm not being a good anything.
00:45:48.98\00:45:52.65
And now, at least, I
was neutral in the hospital
00:45:52.68\00:45:55.92
but now I'm going to negative
00:45:55.95\00:45:58.15
because they're gonna
have to take care of me.
00:45:58.19\00:45:59.52
Yes. Yes.
00:45:59.55\00:46:00.89
They're gonna have to help me.
00:46:00.92\00:46:02.66
And so it was really
bitter-sweet going home
00:46:02.69\00:46:05.83
but I went home.
00:46:05.86\00:46:07.56
And...
00:46:07.60\00:46:12.37
I had a hospital
room in my office.
00:46:12.40\00:46:16.00
I couldn't go up stairs,
00:46:16.04\00:46:17.37
so I had a
hospital room in my office.
00:46:17.41\00:46:20.44
And that's how I lived.
00:46:20.48\00:46:23.41
You know what, by that time,
I was able to transfer myself,
00:46:23.45\00:46:27.08
you know, using the
strength of my arms.
00:46:27.12\00:46:28.92
I could get from the wheelchair
00:46:28.95\00:46:32.52
to the couch or to the toilet.
00:46:32.55\00:46:36.62
I should say that
when they diagnosed me,
00:46:36.66\00:46:39.53
the one thing that
I did allow them to do
00:46:39.56\00:46:41.36
was order me the
super, duper wheelchair.
00:46:41.40\00:46:44.47
And I did that because
we had the best insurance
00:46:44.50\00:46:47.67
that we have ever had.
00:46:47.70\00:46:49.04
My husband worked
for an insurance company.
00:46:49.07\00:46:54.04
Because of what
I'm going to say,
00:46:54.08\00:46:55.41
I'm not going to
say which one it was,
00:46:55.44\00:46:56.78
it was his worst job
ever, and the worst boss ever
00:46:56.81\00:47:01.08
but I can say that
00:47:01.12\00:47:02.45
'cause I'm not going
to tell you the company.
00:47:02.48\00:47:03.82
Right. Okay.
00:47:03.85\00:47:05.29
So the wheelchair
was a price of a car
00:47:05.32\00:47:09.72
because it did everything.
00:47:09.76\00:47:11.09
It had all the bells
and all the whistles,
00:47:11.13\00:47:12.46
it raised up, it
swiveled, it was all terrain,
00:47:12.49\00:47:15.26
all terrain
wheels so that you could,
00:47:15.30\00:47:17.10
you know, go to the
beach if you wanted to,
00:47:17.13\00:47:18.83
and you could go
in the concrete...
00:47:18.87\00:47:20.20
I mean, it was an amazing thing.
00:47:20.24\00:47:23.20
And it came in 18
colors, let's not forget that.
00:47:23.24\00:47:27.71
This is the one
time I had attitude.
00:47:27.74\00:47:30.05
The guy's telling
you about this chair,
00:47:30.08\00:47:31.61
and really, if I
could, I'm not prone to drama
00:47:31.65\00:47:33.72
but if I could have,
I would have jumped up,
00:47:33.75\00:47:35.78
run out screaming,
and crying and, you know.
00:47:35.82\00:47:38.69
But I couldn't do, I
couldn't even wipe my tears
00:47:38.72\00:47:40.29
so I was like,
"Okay, just stay here.
00:47:40.32\00:47:41.66
Be calm."
00:47:41.69\00:47:43.02
Well, I didn't tell
myself to stay there,
00:47:43.06\00:47:44.39
I had to stay there.
00:47:44.43\00:47:45.76
But so they measured me,
00:47:45.79\00:47:47.13
and they're measuring me
for the best of the best.
00:47:47.16\00:47:48.50
I mean, I got all the features
00:47:48.53\00:47:49.86
because the worse you are
the more features you get.
00:47:49.90\00:47:52.73
Finally, I couldn't help myself,
00:47:52.77\00:47:54.30
and he is just
telling me all about it.
00:47:54.34\00:47:55.67
And I said, "Sir, I'm
really happy you like your job.
00:47:55.70\00:47:58.27
You seem like you
really like your job."
00:47:58.31\00:47:59.97
I was also feeling bad
00:48:00.01\00:48:01.34
because there were
people right in my same rehab
00:48:01.38\00:48:03.01
who couldn't get a chair
00:48:03.04\00:48:04.38
because they didn't
have good insurance.
00:48:04.41\00:48:06.72
But I said, "Sir,
it comes in 18 colors,
00:48:06.75\00:48:08.82
it does this, it does that."
00:48:08.85\00:48:10.19
I said, "But do you
realize at the end of the day,
00:48:10.22\00:48:13.09
no matter what it
does, it's a wheelchair."
00:48:13.12\00:48:18.09
I can't get
excited about this, like,
00:48:18.13\00:48:19.93
I really cannot
get excited because...
00:48:19.96\00:48:21.86
He was trying to get
you all hyped up about that.
00:48:21.90\00:48:24.53
He was trying to get me excited.
00:48:24.57\00:48:25.93
I mean, to his
credit, he loved what he did.
00:48:25.97\00:48:30.14
And probably, everybody
in the place except for me
00:48:30.17\00:48:31.91
would have been happy
to be getting that chair
00:48:31.94\00:48:34.21
but I just couldn't,
again, it was the same thing,
00:48:34.24\00:48:36.44
I couldn't succumb to the joy
of all those features thinking,
00:48:36.48\00:48:40.65
I'm not going to need them.
00:48:40.68\00:48:42.62
So my deal with
God was, "God, look,
00:48:42.65\00:48:44.49
I'm gonna let them
measure me for this chair
00:48:44.52\00:48:46.55
but I'm gonna need you to
help me not to need that."
00:48:46.59\00:48:48.66
Because it was special ordered,
00:48:48.69\00:48:50.56
we didn't just go to
the store and get it.
00:48:50.59\00:48:52.33
It sounds like, the deal is
by the time the chair comes,
00:48:52.36\00:48:55.96
I don't want to need the chair,
00:48:56.00\00:48:57.40
so that's the only way
00:48:57.43\00:48:58.77
I'm letting them
measure me for the chair
00:48:58.80\00:49:00.14
'cause I'm trusting by
faith that by that time,
00:49:00.17\00:49:02.30
you're going to get on my time,
00:49:02.34\00:49:04.81
and I'm not going
to need this chair.
00:49:04.84\00:49:06.68
So I go home now.
00:49:06.71\00:49:09.18
And what happens is this,
00:49:09.21\00:49:10.98
I get a call from
Pastor George Williams,
00:49:11.01\00:49:13.11
never seen Pastor
George Williams in my life
00:49:13.15\00:49:15.65
but he knew my best
friend who was a wreck
00:49:15.68\00:49:18.65
because her friend was a wreck.
00:49:18.69\00:49:20.16
And he called me,
00:49:20.19\00:49:21.52
and every time he would
call me and pray for me,
00:49:21.56\00:49:22.89
three or four times
during the course of my illness,
00:49:22.92\00:49:24.69
something little would happen.
00:49:24.73\00:49:26.26
I remember, one time, he
called and after he called,
00:49:26.29\00:49:27.93
I was able to
open a water bottle.
00:49:27.96\00:49:29.43
Let me tell you, I
was dry, call people up,
00:49:29.46\00:49:31.30
"Hey, I just
opened a water bottle."
00:49:31.33\00:49:32.80
They were like, "Okay, good."
00:49:32.83\00:49:35.24
He called, and he said, "You
should walk around your house
00:49:35.27\00:49:37.44
and give God praise."
00:49:37.47\00:49:38.81
I said, "Dude, I
can't walk around my house
00:49:38.84\00:49:40.21
but I'm giving God praise."
00:49:40.24\00:49:42.51
The next day, I wake up,
00:49:42.54\00:49:44.28
and I feel this
strange sensation in my body.
00:49:44.31\00:49:46.82
It's not good or it's
not bad, it's just different.
00:49:46.85\00:49:50.12
I notice it.
00:49:50.15\00:49:51.49
I check it like, nope,
nothing bad's happening,
00:49:51.52\00:49:53.79
I'm going about my business.
00:49:53.82\00:49:55.29
The next day, I wake up
and I know that I can walk.
00:49:55.32\00:50:01.16
And you haven't
walked for six months.
00:50:01.20\00:50:03.16
No. Oh, no, longer than that.
00:50:03.20\00:50:04.80
October, November, December,
January, February, March,
00:50:04.83\00:50:06.74
April, May, June, and
I know that I can walk.
00:50:06.77\00:50:12.47
I want to be clear,
00:50:12.51\00:50:13.84
God didn't tell me I could walk.
00:50:13.88\00:50:15.38
Holy Spirit didn't
whisper you could walk.
00:50:15.41\00:50:16.81
I knew, I just
knew that I could walk.
00:50:16.85\00:50:20.55
And so what's the goal to do?
00:50:20.58\00:50:22.72
Get up and
walk. Get up and walk.
00:50:22.75\00:50:24.82
So I was in my
office, the hospital room,
00:50:24.85\00:50:29.16
and nobody was home,
and I was always careful
00:50:29.19\00:50:31.33
like I didn't
want to add an injury.
00:50:31.36\00:50:32.69
Right.
00:50:32.73\00:50:34.06
But I was like, "I
know I can do this."
00:50:34.10\00:50:35.93
So I pushed the wheelchair,
the walker, and all that stuff,
00:50:35.96\00:50:39.87
and I got up, okay,
and I walked the circle.
00:50:39.90\00:50:45.77
And I sat back down in my
bed and I was like, "I love it."
00:50:45.81\00:50:49.88
So I did it again.
00:50:49.91\00:50:52.05
Then my husband came
home, and I was like,
00:50:52.08\00:50:54.58
"I need to talk to
you", and I told him.
00:50:54.62\00:50:56.45
And that's the
video right there.
00:50:56.48\00:50:57.89
So that's the third
walk because he was like,
00:50:57.92\00:51:00.26
"You have to let me video,
00:51:00.29\00:51:02.92
we have to send
this to everyone."
00:51:02.96\00:51:04.29
And you can see, it's
like, real suspect like...
00:51:04.33\00:51:07.16
Yeah, but you're walking.
00:51:07.20\00:51:09.06
And every day from that point...
00:51:09.10\00:51:11.80
You could walk.
Every day from...
00:51:11.83\00:51:13.74
First of all, I never
stopped walking after that,
00:51:13.77\00:51:16.64
that was it.
00:51:16.67\00:51:18.71
But more than that,
every day, something happened,
00:51:18.74\00:51:21.81
like when that happen, I still
can drive when that happened.
00:51:21.84\00:51:25.05
By July, the day my husband
00:51:25.08\00:51:27.62
started a new
job in a new state,
00:51:27.65\00:51:29.38
the day I needed
to drive, I drove.
00:51:29.42\00:51:34.22
Look at God. Next, I
could drive to Walmart.
00:51:34.26\00:51:37.79
I could get the little cart
00:51:37.83\00:51:39.79
and wheel around
to get my groceries
00:51:39.83\00:51:42.46
but somebody had to
put them in the car for me,
00:51:42.50\00:51:43.97
and I couldn't take them
out of the car when I get home.
00:51:44.00\00:51:46.63
Next time, I can push
the cart around at Walmart
00:51:46.67\00:51:50.61
but I still can't
carry the groceries.
00:51:50.64\00:51:51.97
Right.
00:51:52.01\00:51:53.34
Next time, I can push the cart,
00:51:53.38\00:51:54.71
I can carry one bag of groceries
00:51:54.74\00:51:56.11
because we lived in
an apartment at that time
00:51:56.14\00:51:58.35
because we're in
the process of moving.
00:51:58.38\00:52:00.45
Next time, I can carry two bags,
00:52:00.48\00:52:02.25
and every day, more
and more and more happens.
00:52:02.28\00:52:05.85
Every day more happens.
00:52:05.89\00:52:08.52
I told you my prayer was not
to get to be as good as I was
00:52:08.56\00:52:11.53
but to get better.
00:52:11.56\00:52:12.89
Better.
00:52:12.93\00:52:14.46
And so, and I told
you, I told the doctor,
00:52:14.50\00:52:17.80
when I was paralyzed,
00:52:17.83\00:52:19.17
that I was going to
do, what, quiz question.
00:52:19.20\00:52:20.60
Run a full marathon.
00:52:20.64\00:52:24.31
Three years to the
day, three years to the day,
00:52:24.34\00:52:29.38
I ran the Marine
Corps Marathon, 26.2 miles.
00:52:29.41\00:52:34.35
What?
00:52:34.38\00:52:35.72
26.2 miles, did the
Marine Corps Marathon.
00:52:35.75\00:52:39.22
I had never done
a marathon before.
00:52:39.25\00:52:41.92
But I only did it
00:52:41.96\00:52:43.29
because I wanted to do
something that I hadn't done.
00:52:43.32\00:52:45.16
I wanted to do something to say,
00:52:45.19\00:52:46.63
"No, God is not just taking
me to do what I could do before,
00:52:46.66\00:52:50.30
He's taking me to do more."
00:52:50.33\00:52:52.37
Now a little twist
'cause you're the naturopath.
00:52:52.40\00:52:57.37
When I was at about 65
or 75%, God said to me,
00:52:57.41\00:53:02.24
"The doctors have
done all they can do,
00:53:02.28\00:53:04.41
and you're good
to be where you are."
00:53:04.45\00:53:06.18
People don't get
back to this point
00:53:06.21\00:53:07.55
when they have
the chronic version,
00:53:07.58\00:53:10.02
"You are 65 or 75%, you
have a decision to make."
00:53:10.05\00:53:12.65
He said, "This is not a command.
00:53:12.69\00:53:14.52
You can follow My
eight laws of health
00:53:14.56\00:53:17.63
and that will take you to
where you were and beyond.
00:53:17.66\00:53:21.96
You can do what you want
to do and stay at 65 or 75%.
00:53:22.00\00:53:25.40
The choice is yours."
00:53:25.43\00:53:28.77
And so now, that
was five years ago
00:53:28.80\00:53:32.34
that He said that to me.
00:53:32.37\00:53:33.94
To this day, this is my story.
00:53:33.98\00:53:38.11
As long as I do
what I'm supposed to do,
00:53:38.15\00:53:40.45
I feel fantabulous.
00:53:40.48\00:53:43.28
And the second...
00:53:43.32\00:53:44.65
Oh, I cannot get
rest for two days,
00:53:44.69\00:53:47.06
day three, I'm done.
00:53:47.09\00:53:51.23
I mean, I don't eat perfect
00:53:51.26\00:53:52.59
but I can slack up a day or two.
00:53:52.63\00:53:56.03
After that, I literally feel it.
00:53:56.06\00:53:59.17
I can be stressed for a
day but long term stress,
00:53:59.20\00:54:02.30
I literally feel it.
00:54:02.34\00:54:04.21
So this business of new start,
00:54:04.24\00:54:07.88
this business
of creation health,
00:54:07.91\00:54:10.41
this business of
us living the way that
00:54:10.45\00:54:13.11
this book says we are to
live, it is keeping me alive.
00:54:13.15\00:54:18.25
And I'm not that person that,
you know, when I go to eat,
00:54:18.29\00:54:21.86
I don't look at
what's on your plate,
00:54:21.89\00:54:24.23
maybe I should care more
00:54:24.26\00:54:26.39
but that's not
what God said to you.
00:54:26.43\00:54:28.30
I just know what He said to me.
00:54:28.33\00:54:30.67
Now people are
concerned about my plate
00:54:30.70\00:54:32.07
because I'm walking
around carrying them salads
00:54:32.10\00:54:34.10
and, you know, carrying
them little green juices
00:54:34.14\00:54:36.14
and all of that,
00:54:36.17\00:54:37.51
but I do more mission trips now
than I did before I got sick.
00:54:37.54\00:54:42.38
I am at three or
four trips a year.
00:54:42.41\00:54:44.48
I just got back
from India two weeks ago,
00:54:44.51\00:54:48.82
and in June I'm going to Kenya,
in July I'm going to Bolivia.
00:54:48.85\00:54:55.09
That's three big
international trips in one year.
00:54:55.12\00:54:58.46
It's huge.
00:54:58.49\00:55:00.26
But that's the
blessing of what God can do,
00:55:00.30\00:55:03.26
that's the blessing of...
00:55:03.30\00:55:05.10
Okay, yeah.
00:55:05.13\00:55:06.47
Some medicine got you this far,
some doctors got you this far,
00:55:06.50\00:55:09.10
but if you really
want to do this thing,
00:55:09.14\00:55:10.97
you want to do three four
trips a year, you want to go...
00:55:11.01\00:55:13.81
I registered again
00:55:13.84\00:55:15.24
for the Marine Corps
marathon this morning.
00:55:15.28\00:55:18.55
Another 26.2 miles I
have in front of me, why?
00:55:18.58\00:55:22.22
My girlfriend
made a sign for me once
00:55:22.25\00:55:24.19
when I ran because I can't.
00:55:24.22\00:55:27.96
Honestly, at this point,
00:55:27.99\00:55:29.32
I didn't really
love running like that.
00:55:29.36\00:55:31.26
But because I can't put one foot
00:55:31.29\00:55:32.63
in front of the other,
00:55:32.66\00:55:34.00
I'm gonna do it for
all the people who cannot.
00:55:34.03\00:55:36.23
All the people who cannot.
00:55:36.26\00:55:37.60
I wish I can wear
their names on my back
00:55:37.63\00:55:38.97
and on my front and all over.
00:55:39.00\00:55:41.50
This is so amazing
00:55:41.54\00:55:43.34
because it just shows
how God can take a situation
00:55:43.37\00:55:47.78
that looks to everybody else
as hopeless and turn it around.
00:55:47.81\00:55:52.35
What would you say has
been the greatest lessons
00:55:52.38\00:55:56.82
that you learned
from this experience?
00:55:56.85\00:55:59.75
There's no such
thing as hopeless.
00:56:03.46\00:56:06.80
One of my favorite text
is, "'You are My witness,
00:56:06.83\00:56:09.20
says the Lord."
00:56:09.23\00:56:10.90
I want people to look at me
and know that there is a God.
00:56:10.93\00:56:13.47
Yes. I do. I...
00:56:13.50\00:56:15.30
They don't have to know
all the rules and regulations,
00:56:15.34\00:56:17.47
but I want them to see
me and know there is a God.
00:56:17.51\00:56:19.17
So one of the lessons is
no matter what's going on,
00:56:19.21\00:56:21.98
you can always be a
witness, that's one of them.
00:56:22.01\00:56:24.68
Another one is we have
a great health message,
00:56:24.71\00:56:28.28
use it, follow it.
00:56:28.32\00:56:30.99
And if you don't know what
it is, what should they do?
00:56:31.02\00:56:36.16
I use Genesis 1:29.
00:56:36.19\00:56:38.19
I mean, it just tells you what
to eat, fruit and vegetables.
00:56:38.23\00:56:41.86
Now, there's so much
information everywhere
00:56:41.90\00:56:44.73
that it's hard to
say, "You don't know."
00:56:44.77\00:56:47.50
But some people, you
know, some people watching
00:56:47.54\00:56:49.84
might not be
familiar with healthy living.
00:56:49.87\00:56:53.91
And also, we're
saying fruits, vegetables,
00:56:53.94\00:56:55.68
nuts, seeds, and grains.
00:56:55.71\00:56:57.05
And grains.
Absolutely, and lots of water.
00:56:57.08\00:56:59.48
Lots of water.
00:56:59.51\00:57:01.72
Another lesson that I've learned
00:57:01.75\00:57:03.25
is support
matters, pray for people,
00:57:03.28\00:57:06.99
visit people in the
hospital, send them cards,
00:57:07.02\00:57:09.32
it really does
make a difference.
00:57:09.36\00:57:12.59
Family is everything.
00:57:12.63\00:57:14.90
And God is all that,
00:57:14.93\00:57:16.56
I shouldn't say He's
all that in bag of chips
00:57:16.60\00:57:18.13
'cause we just said, "You
should eat healthy", right?
00:57:18.17\00:57:20.00
So I would say God is
absolutely, positively,
00:57:20.04\00:57:24.24
awesomely, amazing.
00:57:24.27\00:57:25.61
Awesomely amazing.
00:57:25.64\00:57:26.98
And it's fun to serve Him.
00:57:27.01\00:57:28.34
It is fun to serve Him
00:57:28.38\00:57:30.31
because He is
there, He's always there,
00:57:30.35\00:57:32.85
He will never
leave us nor forsake us,
00:57:32.88\00:57:35.18
and He loves us so much.
00:57:35.22\00:57:37.09
He's got us, He's got our back.
00:57:37.12\00:57:38.55
Thank you so much
for being with us.
00:57:38.59\00:57:41.02
My pleasure.
00:57:41.06\00:57:42.39
What a blessing to have you
00:57:42.42\00:57:44.23
and just to hear
what God has brought you
00:57:44.26\00:57:47.50
and to see what He is
continuing to do in your life.
00:57:47.53\00:57:50.90
Thank you for sharing that.
00:57:50.93\00:57:52.63
We hope that you
were blessed today.
00:57:52.67\00:57:54.24
What a powerful testimony
Loretta shared with us.
00:57:54.27\00:57:58.27
We hope that
you'll tune in next time
00:57:58.31\00:57:59.64
because you know what?
00:57:59.67\00:58:01.01
It just wouldn't be
the same without you.
00:58:01.04\00:58:03.65