Who should win the
Father of the Year Award?
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Stay tuned to meet some men who
you may just want to nominate.
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My name is Yvonne Lewis
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and you're
watching Urban Report.
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Hello and
welcome to Urban Report.
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Earlier today, Jason
and I had the opportunity
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to interview three men on
our new Dare to Dream Program
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"A Father's Heart. "
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What a compelling
interview, check it out.
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What a blessing it is
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to be sitting on the
set of: A Father's Heart.
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You have no idea
what's gone into this program.
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I have wanted to do a
program about Fatherhood
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for years on Dare to Dream
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and every year we
have somebody to host
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and it just wouldn't work
out right... for whatever reason
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but the Lord is faithful
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and He has sent some
folks to this program
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that are just amazing!
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So, we're going to
introduce them to you
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but first I just
want to tell you,
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I got my son and assistant,
Jason Bradley with me, yea, Jay.
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Jason: Right... Yvonne: Yeah...
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So, it's really great
and we're going to talk
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to these wonderful men of God...
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these wonderful
fathers who, you will see,
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are authentic and transparent
and what a blessing it is
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so, we're going to start
with the Host, Xavier Morales,
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and we welcome you Xavier.
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Xavier: Thank you.
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You are no
stranger to Dare to Dream,
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you've been on Pure Choices
with your wife, Brittany,
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and we're going to talk about
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your journey and
all that in a bit.
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Thank you so much for hosting
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and for being
on: A Father's Heart
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and then we have,
Pastor Gordon Fraser
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who is another
amazing man of God,
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we have Pastor Denry White who
also is an amazing man of God
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so we are thrilled to
have them and thrilled for you
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to become acquainted with them.
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You need to know who they are,
you need to know their journeys
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and most of
all, you need to know
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that these are men
who'll be authentic
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and transparent with you
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to show you that
if you're a father
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and you're trying and struggling
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to do the right thing,
they're going to show you...
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they've made
mistakes but you get back up
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by the grace of
God and keep going.
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So, let's talk a
bit about your journey.
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Let's start with
you, Pastor White,
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let's start with you.
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Where were you born,
where were you raised?
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I was born originally...
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I was born in
Jamaica, West Indies,
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but then I was
raised in New York City
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Harlem, New York... and
then went to Oakwood College
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and took the call
to Ministry there.
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Yvonne: Yea...
we're Oakwoodites too!
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You too? yeah, a
further call to Ministry
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would compel to go to
Oakwood but then... you know...
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you know how we try
to run from our God...
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I said, "God,
you've made a mistake,"
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I went to Atlanta,
stayed there seven years
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and God would
not leave me alone...
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Well, before you get
that far... let's go back...
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because I kind
of want to know...
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since you're hosting...
you're on A Father's Heart,
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what... what... did you
grow up in an intact family?
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Or was it a
single-parent family or...
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where was your dad?
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My biological
father was in Jamaica
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but even while the
time we were in Jamaica,
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he was in and out of my
life, he has six children,
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all boys and
different mothers and so...
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he and my mother never married,
she had me at 19-years-old
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and, you know, my mother...
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her mother actually was
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a Founder of our Seventh-day
Adventist Church in Jamaica,
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so she went through
a whole "shame" process
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but, you know, I
felt... later on...
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it affected my life and
my journey because of...
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you know... her relationship...
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of her trying to
hide the pregnancy...
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then have to go
through the shame
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because it was a very
ultra-conservative church
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and my
grandmother was very strict,
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didn't talk about sex,
didn't talk about family,
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didn't talk about relationship.
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I remember my mom
even telling me one time
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they got spanked
for looking at a boy
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when they were
sitting in the car,
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and those kinds
of things and so,
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when she had me she
was very ashamed of it...
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and so, I think later
on that affected me...
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Yvonne: How... how do
you think it affected you?
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Well, how I knew this was...
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for years I've just
had this anger in me,
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I'm a man of
humor, I love to laugh...
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I love to make
people laugh and stuff but
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when I had my dark
moments, I would just be angry,
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I lost two jobs... doing that,
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I worked in Mental Health
and I just lost my temper twice.
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I just couldn't take it
and I just... was fired because
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I'd lost my temper, and I've...
in the early part of my marriage
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put holes in
doors, just angry...
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I never hit my
wife... nothing like that...
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but I was just so angry
and I just didn't know why.
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Like I said, it
was the opposite of me.
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I was usually the
fun-loving, laughing person...
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I always had to
joke... these guys know me...
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I always have something to
lighten up the place but then
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when I had my
moments, I'll just be upset...
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and I couldn't know
why and I went to...
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my wife was like...
one day, she was like...
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she's an African American woman,
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she said, "You're going to
see a Counselor or I'm out... "
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and I had to swallow my
pride and see a Counselor
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and after talking for a while,
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you know how they
pull all your background,
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you know... that's why
I grab my pillow sometimes
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Yvonne: Oh, we love that...
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Jason: That's the signature
move on A Father's Heart.
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So let me grab my pillow now
because we're having a good time
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and so... he went all
the way to my background
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even to the womb...
even into the womb...
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and this is something
we'll talk about later on
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even to the womb... of
how my mother's fear...
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trying to hide a
pregnancy... the shame...
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affected me... and I
was like... "How's that?"
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And then he showed me
the patterns of my life...
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like, when I came to America...
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I was taunted by
some... the classmates
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when I was in
first and second grade...
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called all kinds of
names, reference to my nose,
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my skin color, all these things
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and I felt like
the only way to fit in
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was to make fun of people too,
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this is where the
humor part comes in,
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you know... and then
so... throughout my life
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I felt like the
only way to fit in
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because I felt like
I always had to fit in,
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I was just never enough... and
constantly throughout my life
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even with my wife... like...
sometimes I would feel like...
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"What more do you need me to do,
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you don't want me?" I
would just say to her...
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"Are you sure you
married the right one?"
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and she would
just look at me like...
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"I'm invested in
this... what do you...
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why do you keep asking me this?"
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And so I brought this up to the
Counselor... the Psychologist
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and he was explaining to me
the effects of being in the womb
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with your
mother... living in shame...
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and constantly...
even reminding you...
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while you're out
of the womb, like,
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"Hey, I had to
hide the pregnancy... "
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all this... worked into me
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and so... for most of my life,
I've dealt with rejection...
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I wasn't wanted... I
was the "mistake child"
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the mistake...
because in her eyes...
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it was a mistake...
it was her first time...
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because she
wasn't taught about sex,
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she wasn't taught
about relationships
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and so, the next
thing she knew was...
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that she was pregnant
so she was living in shame
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it was her first time...
so, I thought I was a mistake
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until... yeah.
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And isn't it amazing
that what happens in the womb
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affects us throughout our lives,
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we don't even realize that,
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it's not something
that is commonly known...
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it's not something
that's commonly discussed,
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but it can affect
us throughout our lives
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that's why it's so important
to take care of that baby,
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even in utero,
because... because...
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in your life... it can just
follow you... your whole life
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And you also
brought out a good point
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that... you know... she
wasn't talked to about sex,
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her parents never
taught her anything,
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and that's why it's so important
that parents teach their kids
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about sex and all that stuff
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because if they don't
learn from their parents,
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the right way...
the Biblical way...
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"after you get married... "
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then, they're
either learning just...
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from what they see on television
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or what they're
learning from their friends
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or if they're
learning from the Street,
00:09:09.61\00:09:11.01
they're learning about lust
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and not love and
God's plan after marriage.
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Exactly... exactly...
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So, you carried this
into your adulthood and...
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how did this affect
your being a father?
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I didn't have a
father to talk to,
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even my step-dad... for
years kind of neglected me
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he loved me... but
what he considered was love
00:09:35.87\00:09:39.27
was not what I was
looking for... for years
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and so, now... as a father...
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with three beautiful children,
best children in the world,
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my children are better than
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anyone of yours'
children... see that?
00:09:49.05\00:09:51.89
and so... my three
beautiful children...
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wonderful guys...
wonderful, beautiful young girl,
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a lot of times
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I want to have an example
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that I can use in
reference to them...
00:10:04.50\00:10:07.30
in a situation...
but I have none...
00:10:07.34\00:10:10.07
or it's not the best
example... it's a negative one
00:10:10.11\00:10:14.41
and so it's a struggle it
really... even to this day
00:10:14.44\00:10:18.71
now that I use my...
00:10:18.75\00:10:20.88
I try to look at
God as my example...
00:10:20.92\00:10:23.15
I look at Him as a
father but in human nature
00:10:23.18\00:10:25.49
you always want something
tangible... the human...
00:10:25.52\00:10:27.79
that you can say,
"Hey... I want to model
00:10:27.82\00:10:29.66
after that person. "
00:10:29.69\00:10:31.03
and so, there's a difficulty
00:10:31.06\00:10:33.76
because there's a
void that's missing...
00:10:33.80\00:10:35.66
and so... sometimes
when I look for something,
00:10:35.70\00:10:38.67
I don't have it,
00:10:38.73\00:10:40.07
so a lot of times
I have to make it up
00:10:40.10\00:10:42.57
or pray...
literally pray and ask God,
00:10:42.60\00:10:44.64
"What shall I do
in this situation?"
00:10:44.67\00:10:46.71
And I made a lot of
mistakes in my parenting
00:10:46.74\00:10:50.61
as well as my marriage
and by the grace of God,
00:10:50.68\00:10:54.45
I'm doing better,
I'm doing much better
00:10:54.48\00:10:59.12
and I have a lot better to do.
00:10:59.15\00:11:00.69
Amen, thank you,
that's a beautiful piece
00:11:00.76\00:11:06.16
of your journey
because so many men
00:11:06.19\00:11:09.63
have not had a
father as an example,
00:11:09.66\00:11:13.10
so, what do you do?
00:11:13.13\00:11:14.90
What do you pull from?
00:11:14.94\00:11:16.67
And that's what a
father's heart is about.
00:11:16.71\00:11:19.37
It's about your...
sharing your journeys
00:11:19.41\00:11:22.01
as well as giving
strategies and tips to men
00:11:22.08\00:11:26.08
who want to be better
fathers who don't know how.
00:11:26.11\00:11:29.52
What about you, Pastor Gordon,
00:11:29.55\00:11:32.69
tell us about your
journey and your dad.
00:11:32.72\00:11:37.43
I... I had a
father... and an intact family
00:11:37.49\00:11:42.06
my dad was never there
00:11:42.10\00:11:45.60
the marriage was
a communal marriage
00:11:45.63\00:11:47.87
so, most of the time,
he worked away from home,
00:11:47.90\00:11:52.91
very good provider,
there was nothing that
00:11:52.94\00:11:56.24
we could have ever gone without,
00:11:56.28\00:11:58.65
we had
everything that we needed,
00:11:58.68\00:12:00.72
grew up... growing up in Guyana,
00:12:00.75\00:12:02.62
it was a wonderful place,
00:12:02.65\00:12:04.32
but still you had some
economical challenges but
00:12:04.35\00:12:08.32
my family...
because of my dad's position
00:12:08.36\00:12:10.46
and because of what He did,
we never had it... anything...
00:12:10.53\00:12:14.30
but what I didn't
have was him in the home.
00:12:14.30\00:12:18.67
I missed that, so
it was just my mom
00:12:18.70\00:12:23.24
that was with us playing
ball and doing all of the things
00:12:23.27\00:12:27.74
that a father would normally do,
00:12:27.78\00:12:30.75
when he came home
on the weekends...
00:12:30.81\00:12:32.15
because my mom... we were a
Seventh-day Adventist family,
00:12:32.18\00:12:36.28
he was not... he
had left the church
00:12:36.32\00:12:38.89
so, he wouldn't even
go to church with us,
00:12:38.92\00:12:41.89
and I still remember those days
when we would walk to church
00:12:41.96\00:12:47.36
and my dad was out
with the car, driving,
00:12:47.40\00:12:50.30
and we'd just walk to
church and come back home
00:12:50.33\00:12:54.37
and so we never had that...
00:12:54.40\00:12:56.47
I never had that
time that I craved,
00:12:56.50\00:12:59.67
so I grew up...
unbeknownst to me
00:12:59.71\00:13:02.88
with a lot of
resentment towards my dad
00:13:02.91\00:13:05.91
and when it all clicked is
when... my dad got very sick
00:13:05.95\00:13:12.12
and had Diabetes...
he lost his sight...
00:13:12.15\00:13:17.73
and it was very, very
difficult for me... as a son...
00:13:17.76\00:13:27.00
to step in to help him,
00:13:27.04\00:13:28.80
I remember days when
he would be calling me
00:13:28.84\00:13:32.07
and I'd just sit
there and didn't want to go.
00:13:32.11\00:13:35.34
looking back, how much...
00:13:35.38\00:13:39.31
it's a lot of pain even
talking about it, right now,
00:13:39.35\00:13:42.48
but... I had to forgive him,
00:13:42.52\00:13:47.22
I had to get to a point
where I'd forgive him...
00:13:47.26\00:13:51.79
if I didn't... there was no way
00:13:51.83\00:13:54.23
that I could have
reached out to him
00:13:54.30\00:13:56.60
and just do what I
needed to do as a son,
00:13:56.63\00:14:00.24
I always wanted to...
not to be like my father...
00:14:00.27\00:14:06.51
working... working...
00:14:06.54\00:14:08.64
spending no time
with the children
00:14:08.68\00:14:10.85
but somehow... I was
turning out to be like him
00:14:10.88\00:14:17.09
in ministry... always gone...
00:14:17.12\00:14:20.86
but I thank God
that every now and again,
00:14:20.89\00:14:23.73
I have a wife that
checks me and says,
00:14:23.76\00:14:26.53
"Hmmm... hmmm...
you're gone too much,
00:14:26.56\00:14:29.00
you need to spend
time with the children. "
00:14:29.03\00:14:31.93
I did a lot of that
when they were babies
00:14:31.97\00:14:34.74
and I was not in ministry,
just working in Florida,
00:14:34.77\00:14:37.71
I would spend time, I was there,
00:14:37.74\00:14:40.04
I was always there
with them going right...
00:14:40.08\00:14:42.58
doing the things
that my dad didn't do,
00:14:42.61\00:14:45.11
riding with
them, taking them out,
00:14:45.15\00:14:48.15
I mean, they were
always in my hand,
00:14:48.18\00:14:51.55
they just stayed
right here, you know,
00:14:51.59\00:14:55.16
but coming back to
when my dad was sick
00:14:55.22\00:14:58.76
he was in a nursing home,
00:14:58.79\00:15:01.26
we had to take him and
put him in a nursing home...
00:15:01.30\00:15:03.16
I wouldn't go see
him, I just couldn't.
00:15:03.20\00:15:08.00
Did you feel...
when you weren't going...
00:15:08.04\00:15:12.64
did you feel anger toward him,
00:15:12.67\00:15:15.51
what were you feeling
that was blocking... going?
00:15:15.54\00:15:20.52
That's the
amazing thing, I really...
00:15:20.55\00:15:23.62
I can't articulate
what I was feeling...
00:15:23.69\00:15:26.76
it was almost like a
numbness, say, you know,
00:15:26.79\00:15:31.03
why even go?
almost a resentment.
00:15:31.06\00:15:35.60
But I really... at that
time... couldn't articulate
00:15:35.63\00:15:39.57
what I was dealing
with until later on in life.
00:15:39.60\00:15:43.51
Then, I was
actually preaching a sermon
00:15:43.57\00:15:47.88
and I used the illustration
and then all of a sudden,
00:15:47.91\00:15:50.98
I broke down and then I realized
00:15:51.01\00:15:54.48
"Wow! this is what
I was dealing with"
00:15:54.52\00:15:59.52
and I'll never forget
the sight of the thing,
00:15:59.55\00:16:04.19
the Holy Spirit drove
me to the Nursing Home
00:16:04.26\00:16:07.60
and I got there and
I walk into the room,
00:16:07.66\00:16:11.00
I looked at my dad and I just...
00:16:11.03\00:16:13.94
Pastor: Sorry man...
Yvonne: Yeah... take your time
00:16:13.97\00:16:21.61
I just broke down,
00:16:21.64\00:16:24.68
because here's the son
00:16:24.75\00:16:27.75
now becoming a
father... Yvonne: Hmmm...
00:16:27.78\00:16:31.59
a father who wasn't there...
00:16:31.62\00:16:36.19
Yvonne: Yes...
00:16:36.22\00:16:37.93
Gordon: and... Hmmm...
00:16:37.96\00:16:47.50
I just got over to
him and I touched him
00:16:47.54\00:16:51.31
and said, "Dad, I'm here"
00:16:51.37\00:16:55.51
Yvonne: Hmmm...
00:16:55.54\00:16:58.15
and the Holy Spirit
just said, just sing...
00:16:58.18\00:17:01.85
and I started to sing...
"When peace like a river"
00:17:01.88\00:17:05.29
and then I moved to "What
a friend we have in Jesus"
00:17:05.32\00:17:08.22
and something just
started to change...
00:17:08.26\00:17:13.33
inside of me
00:17:13.36\00:17:15.20
and I started to pray
and ask God to forgive me
00:17:15.23\00:17:20.34
because the times that
I could have had with him
00:17:20.37\00:17:25.24
I knew he was not
going to last for too long...
00:17:25.27\00:17:30.15
the times I could have
had... I wasted those times...
00:17:30.18\00:17:34.98
Yvonne: Hmmm...
hmmm... hmmm... hmmm...
00:17:35.02\00:17:36.69
But I thank God that I was
able to push all of that hurt
00:17:36.72\00:17:41.79
and anger and stuff
inside and allow the Holy Spirit
00:17:41.82\00:17:46.46
to just change me so
that I could reach out to him
00:17:46.49\00:17:51.03
and I tell you this...
the latter days of his life
00:17:51.07\00:17:55.54
were the best days
of my life with him
00:17:55.57\00:17:58.87
because I would
visit him and sing to him
00:17:58.91\00:18:02.21
and ask him to give his life...
00:18:02.24\00:18:04.81
"Lord, forgive
him for everything"
00:18:04.85\00:18:07.35
so the one great
consolation that I have...
00:18:07.38\00:18:11.79
is that when Jesus comes
again, I will see him again
00:18:11.82\00:18:17.76
and when I see him again,
00:18:17.79\00:18:20.16
we will have all the time
in the world to spend together
00:18:20.23\00:18:25.80
so, that's what
keeps me encouraged,
00:18:25.87\00:18:30.31
that's what keeps me going,
00:18:30.34\00:18:32.24
because I know I
would have that time.
00:18:32.27\00:18:34.44
That is so beautiful, you know,
00:18:34.51\00:18:36.64
a couple of things, one is...
00:18:36.68\00:18:38.81
forgiveness frees us,
00:18:38.88\00:18:42.55
you know, when we hold things...
00:18:42.58\00:18:45.32
and you can't... have to
make a conscious decision
00:18:45.35\00:18:48.49
that "Lord, please
help me to forgive"
00:18:48.56\00:18:51.26
because people can
hurt us so deeply...
00:18:51.29\00:18:54.00
so deeply... and yet...
00:18:54.00\00:18:56.16
you know, you asked God
to help you to forgive him
00:18:56.20\00:19:00.37
and He did, and
you were set free,
00:19:00.47\00:19:03.84
you were set free,
00:19:03.87\00:19:06.24
because it wasn't
him so much as you...
00:19:06.27\00:19:09.54
so God set you
free through forgiveness
00:19:09.58\00:19:12.85
and yet so many people are...
00:19:12.88\00:19:14.72
you might be harboring
00:19:14.75\00:19:16.65
some ill feelings towards
someone that's hurt you deeply,
00:19:16.72\00:19:19.85
but know that God wants
to set you free from that
00:19:19.89\00:19:23.66
you have to just ask
Him, "Help me, set me free...
00:19:23.69\00:19:27.30
help me to forgive this
person" and it's not easy
00:19:27.36\00:19:30.90
but when you do
that, it sets you free.
00:19:30.97\00:19:35.40
And the other thing
that I wanted to mention
00:19:35.47\00:19:38.37
was that, so often
we can get caught up
00:19:38.41\00:19:42.48
even in the work of the Lord
I mean... these are pastors...
00:19:42.51\00:19:45.45
chaplains... all here...
00:19:45.48\00:19:47.95
you can get so caught
up in the work of the Lord,
00:19:47.98\00:19:51.79
that you neglect
the Lord of the work
00:19:51.82\00:19:53.99
and we have to stay, prayed up,
00:19:54.06\00:19:59.06
we have to stay connected
because without that connection,
00:19:59.09\00:20:02.96
it's just works...
00:20:03.00\00:20:04.33
it's just works... and
our families are suffering.
00:20:04.37\00:20:08.94
That's a good point because
00:20:08.97\00:20:10.57
Sister White says
in Adventist Home,
00:20:10.61\00:20:12.77
I couldn't tell
you the page number,
00:20:12.81\00:20:14.88
my girlfriend and I
read Adventist Home together,
00:20:14.94\00:20:18.41
it's like 500
something pages right... so...
00:20:18.45\00:20:21.42
Yvonne: I'm proud of
you. Jason: Thanks to Tiffany.
00:20:21.45\00:20:23.35
But she says that
ministry starts in the home,
00:20:23.39\00:20:28.69
so often we look to go
outside of the home to minister,
00:20:28.72\00:20:32.79
we look to go to
outside of the Country,
00:20:32.83\00:20:34.83
we have our own
problems right here in America,
00:20:34.83\00:20:37.20
we have our own
problems right here at home,
00:20:37.23\00:20:39.50
and so... so often we
see a lot of pastors that...
00:20:39.53\00:20:42.84
they get so
caught up in ministry
00:20:42.90\00:20:46.54
that they neglect their
families and it's not on purpose
00:20:46.61\00:20:50.08
it's just that they're
ministering to everyone else
00:20:50.11\00:20:53.98
and their families need
them to minister to them.
00:20:54.05\00:20:59.65
Yes, so, we're so thankful
that God is a faithful God
00:20:59.69\00:21:05.36
and that He knows
your journey intimately
00:21:05.39\00:21:08.93
and He has brought you
from this point to this point
00:21:08.96\00:21:14.37
because now,
there are so many men
00:21:14.44\00:21:17.77
and women whose fathers
and mothers... on some level
00:21:17.81\00:21:21.61
have just... you
know... it's been dysfunctional
00:21:21.64\00:21:25.38
and what you are
doing with this program
00:21:25.41\00:21:28.98
is... sharing your
journey and letting people know
00:21:29.02\00:21:32.39
that God is faithful
and that He will redeem...
00:21:32.42\00:21:35.79
and that He will restore...
00:21:35.82\00:21:37.73
because that's
what He's done for you.
00:21:37.76\00:21:39.96
What about you Xavier?
00:21:40.00\00:21:42.06
I grew up in the
perfect home, so to speak,
00:21:42.10\00:21:45.17
Adventist,
vegetarian, the works...
00:21:45.20\00:21:48.57
I did everything
according to the book,
00:21:48.60\00:21:51.91
and my dad and my mom
00:21:51.97\00:21:54.51
have been married
for almost 40 years now,
00:21:54.54\00:21:56.31
so it's been fantastic yet...
00:21:56.34\00:21:59.05
and I was taught by my
dad... I'm the only child,
00:21:59.08\00:22:01.45
so I was taught... my
dad was always there...
00:22:01.48\00:22:03.79
when he got home from work
00:22:03.82\00:22:06.02
even though tired,
he'll spend time with me,
00:22:06.05\00:22:07.79
he taught me how to fix
cars, how to build things and
00:22:07.86\00:22:11.03
basically everything
that a dad needs to do
00:22:11.06\00:22:13.63
except on how to
cope with my emotions...
00:22:13.70\00:22:16.13
that always has been
my handicap all my life.
00:22:16.16\00:22:20.20
My dad... he only
taught me what he knew
00:22:20.24\00:22:24.31
but what he knew was
anger, he never abused me
00:22:24.34\00:22:28.81
but I did get disciplined
and the way he coped with me
00:22:28.84\00:22:36.52
when I would get... you know...
00:22:36.55\00:22:37.92
I tried to talk to
him about my emotions
00:22:37.95\00:22:40.16
and just... you know,
basically not deal with it
00:22:40.22\00:22:43.39
you know, I'd
have to talk to my mom
00:22:43.43\00:22:45.99
and I remember
when I got to the age...
00:22:46.03\00:22:48.53
at my adolescent age,
00:22:48.56\00:22:50.03
between the
hormones and everything,
00:22:50.10\00:22:52.60
I was always wanting to talk,
00:22:52.63\00:22:54.90
I was always more
of the emotional son...
00:22:54.97\00:22:57.14
I wanted to
talk... express myself
00:22:57.24\00:22:59.04
and my dad... one
time... he just looked at me
00:22:59.07\00:23:01.81
and he said, "I
can't deal with... "
00:23:01.84\00:23:03.45
he looked at my
mom... he looked at me...
00:23:03.48\00:23:05.01
he said, "I can't deal with
him anymore... you talk to him"
00:23:05.05\00:23:07.42
I felt so rejected in my
own home that I was like...
00:23:07.45\00:23:12.45
"If he rejects me... then...
I don't like God anymore"
00:23:12.52\00:23:17.53
because he was
the image of God to me
00:23:17.56\00:23:21.10
my father
reflects my Heavenly Father
00:23:21.16\00:23:24.60
and I rejected and
I said to myself...
00:23:24.63\00:23:28.07
"Well, if God doesn't exist...
00:23:28.10\00:23:29.44
if God exists
according to what they say,
00:23:29.47\00:23:31.41
then the devil exists too"
00:23:31.44\00:23:32.81
so if my father
rejects me... then...
00:23:32.84\00:23:35.18
I don't want any part of this,
I'm going to the other side
00:23:35.21\00:23:37.68
and I accepted
Satan... as it were
00:23:37.71\00:23:41.45
into my heart for 12 years...
00:23:41.48\00:23:43.59
Yvonne: 12 years!
00:23:43.65\00:23:45.69
When you first were drawn to
that whole... the dark side...
00:23:45.72\00:23:52.13
did you have any kind of
reticence about getting into it
00:23:52.16\00:23:58.50
were you hesitant at all?
00:23:58.53\00:24:00.14
Did you say... "Oooh!
I don't know about that?"
00:24:00.17\00:24:04.11
What drew you to that?
00:24:04.14\00:24:06.11
I was angry and part of my
emotional state was because
00:24:06.14\00:24:09.51
I was in my adolescent stage,
I had been rejected by girls...
00:24:09.54\00:24:13.82
"the short pudgy guy... "
and then rejected by my father,
00:24:13.85\00:24:17.82
I was just angry and God
wasn't making my anger go away
00:24:17.85\00:24:22.19
so I wanted to feed into
it and I wanted people to pay
00:24:22.22\00:24:26.53
and I remember I told the
devil, "I will join you...
00:24:26.56\00:24:30.77
I already know
what you're about...
00:24:30.83\00:24:32.43
I don't want to be
some dark-dressing,
00:24:32.47\00:24:35.50
Goth-looking person,
I want to serve you and
00:24:35.54\00:24:38.54
I want to kill
those who hurt me. "
00:24:38.57\00:24:42.08
Pastor: Mercy... Yvonne: Wow...
00:24:42.14\00:24:44.38
I studied about serial killers
00:24:44.45\00:24:46.61
and I wanted to be the
most famous of them all.
00:24:46.68\00:24:49.32
Pastor: Mercy...
have mercy... Yvonne: Wow!
00:24:49.35\00:24:53.76
You really... really
went over to the dark side
00:24:53.82\00:24:58.19
and let's be clear
about where you are
00:24:58.23\00:25:03.57
when you're on that side,
like... did you have any joy?
00:25:03.60\00:25:07.77
Did you have
any... like where were you
00:25:07.80\00:25:10.41
in the other parts
of your emotional life?
00:25:10.44\00:25:12.87
I thought I had joy... I mean...
I got everything I wanted
00:25:12.91\00:25:18.28
but it was my
flesh... I wanted it and not...
00:25:18.35\00:25:22.15
it was always... at the end
of the day I still felt empty
00:25:22.18\00:25:24.95
and I fed my
emptiness with alcoholism...
00:25:24.99\00:25:29.56
at 15... I was
already an alcoholic,
00:25:29.59\00:25:31.63
drugs, women, pornography,
00:25:31.66\00:25:36.73
everything that can keep
my brain... a pile of mush
00:25:36.77\00:25:40.30
so I could still be
a puppet of the devil.
00:25:40.34\00:25:43.14
Every type of coping mechanism,
if you want to call it that
00:25:43.17\00:25:47.54
was available to
me at my disposal
00:25:47.58\00:25:50.21
and I would get
in fights with people
00:25:50.25\00:25:52.81
and not even recall...
all I remembered was just
00:25:52.85\00:25:56.58
waking up and
knowing nothing on me...
00:25:56.65\00:25:59.29
but they were
just beyond injured
00:25:59.32\00:26:01.52
and I lost a lot of
friends because they told me,
00:26:01.59\00:26:04.99
"Xavier, you're
going to kill somebody... "
00:26:05.03\00:26:07.83
and they said, "You
don't even need a weapon,
00:26:07.86\00:26:10.57
you'd just do it
with your bare hands. "
00:26:10.67\00:26:12.17
And I remember, I
would look at them and say,
00:26:12.20\00:26:15.70
"That's the goal... "
and I lost a lot of friends
00:26:15.77\00:26:19.24
and... I mean... it
took me till I was 25
00:26:19.27\00:26:21.38
and I met God...
00:26:21.41\00:26:24.25
I ended up in jail by
getting into a Bar fight
00:26:24.28\00:26:27.52
and I was
already a Police Officer
00:26:27.55\00:26:29.45
trying to do the right thing
00:26:29.48\00:26:31.12
and all that... but my dad...
00:26:31.15\00:26:32.75
I never talked to my
dad throughout that time,
00:26:32.79\00:26:35.36
I talked to my
mom and my mom said,
00:26:35.39\00:26:38.36
"We'll pray for you" and,
00:26:38.39\00:26:40.50
you know, "please...
" she would beg with me
00:26:40.53\00:26:42.63
and I just didn't listen,
I was so angry at the world
00:26:42.66\00:26:46.17
and I resonate with Pastor
Denry because I worn down...
00:26:46.20\00:26:49.67
I would smash doors,
windows, I mean, I would bleed,
00:26:49.70\00:26:53.17
my hands would bleed
and I would feel no pain,
00:26:53.21\00:26:55.04
I mean, the anger was
so... I can't even describe it.
00:26:55.08\00:26:59.11
Yvonne: Hmmm...
Xavier: I was so angry
00:26:59.15\00:27:02.32
and God met me in
jail. Pastor: Mercy...
00:27:02.35\00:27:05.35
And He said... and it's
not this compassionate God
00:27:05.39\00:27:09.36
that people... He
knew I was hard-headed.
00:27:09.39\00:27:11.93
He just said, "Are you done?"
00:27:11.96\00:27:13.83
All: Hmmm...
00:27:13.86\00:27:15.16
"Are you ready
to try my way now?"
00:27:15.20\00:27:16.53
All: Hmmm...
00:27:16.56\00:27:17.90
And I started to...
and... I talked to my dad,
00:27:17.93\00:27:21.04
my dad was actually the one...
I was in a different State
00:27:21.07\00:27:25.27
I was out of the
State of Florida,
00:27:25.31\00:27:26.68
in West Virginia and
00:27:26.71\00:27:28.08
he's the one that
came... bailed me out of jail
00:27:28.11\00:27:30.05
with his retirement fund and...
00:27:30.08\00:27:32.91
Now this was before or after
you had an encounter with God?
00:27:32.95\00:27:37.49
After I had an encounter and...
00:27:37.52\00:27:39.62
I mean, I tried
to commit suicide
00:27:39.65\00:27:41.69
before that...
everything... you name it...
00:27:41.72\00:27:44.03
I was just empty...
empty... empty... empty...
00:27:44.06\00:27:46.19
an emptiness that I could not
describe, it's like a black hole
00:27:46.23\00:27:48.53
and you try to fill it
but it just doesn't work,
00:27:48.56\00:27:52.10
it's the "God space,"
00:27:52.13\00:27:53.50
it's the space
that God needs to take.
00:27:53.54\00:27:55.14
Yvonne: That's right.
00:27:55.17\00:27:56.50
And my dad
packed up all my stuff
00:27:56.54\00:27:58.67
and he says, you
know, I lost a home...
00:27:58.71\00:28:01.04
I lost... I had a house,
00:28:01.08\00:28:02.64
two cars, a wife... in 24
hours, everything was gone.
00:28:02.68\00:28:07.15
Wife, cars, everything...
00:28:07.18\00:28:09.92
and my dad said,
"You're coming home"
00:28:09.95\00:28:11.89
and we talked for... it
was like a twelve-hour trip,
00:28:11.92\00:28:14.39
we talked and he
asked me for forgiveness...
00:28:14.42\00:28:18.39
for not listening,
for being too strict on me
00:28:18.43\00:28:22.06
and not teaching me
that a real man cries,
00:28:22.10\00:28:25.73
Yvonne: Hmmm...
00:28:25.77\00:28:27.14
So I made amends with my dad and
it wasn't until I was an adult
00:28:27.17\00:28:33.98
that I learned
how to be a father.
00:28:34.01\00:28:36.85
It's crazy
because I have two girls
00:28:36.95\00:28:39.71
and I'm like, "God...
00:28:39.75\00:28:41.72
I'm such a... I'm so
rough around the edges
00:28:41.75\00:28:45.12
why did you give me two girls?"
00:28:45.15\00:28:46.49
And my
four-year-old ministers to me
00:28:46.52\00:28:50.13
and makes me a better father.
00:28:50.16\00:28:52.23
Hmmm... that is a
powerful testimony,
00:28:52.26\00:28:57.67
I mean, because,
you know, what you show
00:28:57.70\00:29:00.57
is that... because we
always talk about God's plan,
00:29:00.60\00:29:04.14
God has a plan to prosper us,
00:29:04.17\00:29:06.17
God has a plan to
give us a future and a hope
00:29:06.21\00:29:09.81
you know... an expected end
00:29:09.84\00:29:11.75
but Satan has a
plan... to destroy...
00:29:11.78\00:29:14.75
and so... whoever we choose...
00:29:14.78\00:29:18.05
that's the plan we're on,
00:29:18.09\00:29:19.69
and when we choose God's plan,
God has just brought you back up
00:29:19.75\00:29:26.29
that hole is full
now with His presence
00:29:26.33\00:29:30.17
but before...
Satan was taking you down
00:29:30.27\00:29:34.04
and you were more
and more despondent,
00:29:34.07\00:29:36.54
more and more in
despair because...
00:29:36.57\00:29:39.04
because you were serving
00:29:39.07\00:29:40.81
the enemy of souls and
so, when you do that...
00:29:40.88\00:29:45.08
you're going to be...
you're walking the dark side
00:29:45.11\00:29:48.62
but God is so faithful
because He knew what it took
00:29:48.65\00:29:52.09
to get your attention
and He knew what it took
00:29:52.12\00:29:55.59
to bring you back to Him,
to really bring you to Him,
00:29:55.66\00:29:59.66
this time, not
through your parents,
00:29:59.69\00:30:02.26
not through their relationship
but your relationship
00:30:02.30\00:30:05.70
and so... I mean... I
think that that is just
00:30:05.73\00:30:09.20
incredible and I think
all of you are better fathers
00:30:09.24\00:30:13.14
because of your
journey, not that... you know...
00:30:13.17\00:30:17.01
not that God put you on
that path... we make choices...
00:30:17.11\00:30:21.42
and there are
consequences to those choices
00:30:21.45\00:30:25.45
but your journey has
made you better dads.
00:30:25.49\00:30:29.42
What do you think Jason?
00:30:29.46\00:30:30.89
It's also
interesting because I mean...
00:30:30.93\00:30:32.76
usually in all situations
00:30:32.79\00:30:34.36
where there's
either an absent father
00:30:34.40\00:30:37.13
or a father who just really
doesn't know how to be a father
00:30:37.20\00:30:41.00
to his child, that kid grows up
00:30:41.04\00:30:43.34
and he either
goes one of two ways...
00:30:43.37\00:30:46.21
. either he becomes
just like his dad...
00:30:46.27\00:30:49.04
and treats his kids the
same way that his dad did,
00:30:49.11\00:30:52.08
or he breaks that cycle
00:30:52.11\00:30:54.85
and he gives his
kids what he never had
00:30:54.88\00:30:57.59
and so it's interesting to see
that the fathers that grow up
00:30:57.62\00:31:04.13
and the kids that
grow up and become fathers
00:31:04.16\00:31:07.30
that give their kids what
their dad never gave them.
00:31:07.40\00:31:11.77
My dad... when I was a kid...
00:31:11.80\00:31:15.40
he lost his dad
at a very early age,
00:31:15.44\00:31:19.01
I mean, he was
still a kid himself
00:31:19.04\00:31:22.54
and so I never had a
chance to meet my grandpa,
00:31:22.58\00:31:25.38
well, from the
stories that I've heard,
00:31:25.45\00:31:27.52
my dad didn't experience...
00:31:27.58\00:31:30.95
like... he didn't
have the greatest childhood
00:31:30.99\00:31:34.82
I think he got
like his first present
00:31:34.86\00:31:38.93
I think is... what? his
only present was like a bike
00:31:38.99\00:31:42.86
or something like that...
00:31:42.90\00:31:44.53
that was like one
of his only presents
00:31:44.57\00:31:46.87
for his birthday
or something like that
00:31:46.90\00:31:49.17
and it's not
about material things
00:31:49.20\00:31:50.94
but there were other
issues within the family
00:31:50.97\00:31:53.21
but when I came... when
I broke out into the world
00:31:53.24\00:31:58.25
in... well... we
won't say the year...
00:31:58.28\00:32:01.15
but when I broke
out into the world,
00:32:01.22\00:32:03.99
my dad gave me what
his father didn't give him,
00:32:04.02\00:32:11.56
you know, we
don't... we don't say,
00:32:11.59\00:32:14.50
"I love you" and
stuff like that a lot
00:32:14.56\00:32:17.47
but I can tell by his
actions that he loves me.
00:32:17.53\00:32:21.27
My mother and father
got divorced when I was...
00:32:21.30\00:32:25.01
what? five or six?
Yvonne: Hmmm... hmmm...
00:32:25.04\00:32:27.44
and when I was
about five or six...
00:32:27.48\00:32:29.24
of course, as a kid, I
didn't understand that,
00:32:29.28\00:32:31.71
I wasn't happy about it at first
00:32:31.75\00:32:34.22
but then I grew to
like it for selfish reasons
00:32:34.28\00:32:36.55
I had two places to
go... two sets of gifts
00:32:36.58\00:32:38.85
and my dad wasn't in the church,
00:32:38.89\00:32:43.02
he wasn't an Adventist
and so, it was different,
00:32:43.06\00:32:47.60
it was different,
he was the "fun parent"
00:32:47.66\00:32:50.03
Yvonne: Thanks a lot.
00:32:50.10\00:32:51.43
Jason: Well, you were fun but...
00:32:51.47\00:32:53.00
Yvonne: No, I really wasn't
as much fun as your dad was.
00:32:53.03\00:32:55.64
I had different
rules in the house.
00:32:55.67\00:32:58.57
Yeah, you did... and he
had rules but it was different,
00:32:58.61\00:33:01.11
so, I got...
00:33:01.14\00:33:03.55
you ended up getting
re-married when I was...
00:33:03.58\00:33:06.58
going into like the fifth grade,
00:33:06.61\00:33:09.18
but one thing that really
stood out that my dad's done...
00:33:09.22\00:33:13.79
is... when we moved to
Texas, I threw a temper tantrum,
00:33:13.86\00:33:18.26
I was throwing things,
00:33:18.29\00:33:19.63
I was so hurt because
I wanted my dad there,
00:33:19.66\00:33:23.00
my dad uprooted his
whole life and moved to Texas
00:33:23.03\00:33:26.27
to finish raising me
and I mean that is so...
00:33:26.30\00:33:29.50
I was the only
reason why he moved there
00:33:29.54\00:33:33.27
and for me... that
just... that showed me how much
00:33:33.34\00:33:37.51
he loves me and I
hope that when I grow...
00:33:37.55\00:33:41.72
well, I'm grown up now
00:33:41.78\00:33:44.42
but when I grow
and become a father,
00:33:44.45\00:33:47.26
if that's God's will... that
I can be like him in that sense.
00:33:47.32\00:33:53.96
Yeah, it means a lot to know...
00:33:54.03\00:33:58.73
for your children to know
00:33:58.77\00:34:00.44
that you really love them,
that you really care about them
00:34:00.47\00:34:04.54
and you show them,
not just by what you say
00:34:04.57\00:34:06.68
but by the time
that you've spent
00:34:06.71\00:34:08.64
and that's what
you guys talk about too
00:34:08.68\00:34:10.75
on: A Father's Heart.
00:34:10.78\00:34:12.25
The time that you spend in...
and you give tips and strategies
00:34:12.28\00:34:17.19
let's talk about the importance
of the father in the home
00:34:17.22\00:34:20.46
because even if...
again, in Jay's case...
00:34:20.49\00:34:24.33
his Dad wasn't...
we weren't together
00:34:24.36\00:34:26.90
but we were friends
enough for me to say,
00:34:26.93\00:34:29.36
"Come, come down here,
00:34:29.40\00:34:31.30
Jason really needs
you it's fine with me,"
00:34:31.33\00:34:33.94
I knew his dad wasn't going
to interfere in my life, so...
00:34:34.00\00:34:37.61
And you never
talked bad about dad to me
00:34:37.64\00:34:40.24
and he's never
talked bad about you to me
00:34:40.28\00:34:42.78
and that's important too.
00:34:42.81\00:34:45.05
Yvonne: Yeah, yeah, and
I praise the Lord for that.
00:34:45.08\00:34:47.88
You know, it's
important that we don't
00:34:47.92\00:34:49.48
put our children in the
middle and make them "pawns"
00:34:49.52\00:34:53.32
you know, just
because you and the spouse
00:34:53.36\00:34:58.29
or significant
other didn't make it,
00:34:58.33\00:35:00.66
you don't put the
child in the middle
00:35:00.73\00:35:02.86
but we have a crisis
in our communities today,
00:35:02.93\00:35:08.20
we have a crisis of not...
of having absentee fathers
00:35:08.24\00:35:14.21
it blows my mind that
all the media pushes sex
00:35:14.28\00:35:21.15
it pushes: have
sex, do this, do that,
00:35:21.18\00:35:23.99
but it's not
talking about the babies
00:35:24.02\00:35:26.86
that you're going to be siring,
00:35:26.89\00:35:28.96
you know, it's one thing...
00:35:28.99\00:35:31.03
you're not a man or a
woman because you can procreate,
00:35:31.06\00:35:35.10
because you can have a child,
00:35:35.13\00:35:37.27
you are a real
man or a real woman
00:35:37.33\00:35:40.10
when you parent,
that's... you know...
00:35:40.14\00:35:42.84
and in our communities,
we are missing fathers,
00:35:42.87\00:35:46.64
let's talk about
the effect of that...
00:35:46.68\00:35:49.91
not just in the family
but on the community at large,
00:35:49.94\00:35:53.21
what do you think Pastor Denry?
00:35:53.25\00:35:54.62
I mean... it's... it's...
the turning point in my life
00:35:54.65\00:35:57.59
was about four years ago,
00:35:57.62\00:36:00.42
I picked up the
phone, my dad was calling me,
00:36:00.49\00:36:03.66
I actually called
him, my stepfather...
00:36:03.69\00:36:05.89
and the first time in my
life, he said, "Hello, Son... "
00:36:05.93\00:36:11.23
Yvonne: Hmmm...
00:36:11.27\00:36:12.90
My stepfather always
referred to me as, "Young man"
00:36:12.93\00:36:15.64
and... I mean... this
was only four years ago
00:36:15.67\00:36:19.34
and that was a turning
point in my life to hear that...
00:36:19.41\00:36:22.98
remember I said that
I dealt with rejection
00:36:23.01\00:36:25.48
and even though he
raised me most of my life,
00:36:25.51\00:36:27.92
I always felt that he
never accepted me as his own
00:36:27.95\00:36:31.49
and so, when he said that,
00:36:31.52\00:36:33.66
that just blew me away...
00:36:33.69\00:36:35.79
I called my wife
like... after... and like...
00:36:35.82\00:36:38.79
"My dad called me
'son'" so I can imagine like
00:36:38.86\00:36:42.16
kids in the communities
who never hear that...
00:36:42.20\00:36:45.53
if it meant
something to me at...
00:36:45.57\00:36:48.44
a few years ago... and
I'm an adult man, married,
00:36:48.47\00:36:52.77
have my children, could
you imagine what it means
00:36:52.81\00:36:56.14
to these kids
who've never heard that?
00:36:56.18\00:36:58.51
If they can just
hear their father
00:36:58.55\00:37:00.55
call them "son"
or "daughter... "
00:37:00.58\00:37:02.42
I mean, that would just
like... do some... good...
00:37:02.45\00:37:05.89
I mean other people have
called your son, whatever,
00:37:05.92\00:37:08.86
you try to have mentors...
that means something to us,
00:37:08.89\00:37:11.79
that title means...
00:37:11.83\00:37:13.23
that's like the
best title you can have
00:37:13.26\00:37:15.16
for your parent to call
you what you are to them.
00:37:15.23\00:37:19.90
And so, by reaching to
our communities and mentoring
00:37:19.93\00:37:23.07
or whatever we can do,
stepping in sometimes as fathers
00:37:23.10\00:37:26.17
because we have some experience
00:37:26.24\00:37:28.08
and maybe... we
can't replace the father
00:37:28.11\00:37:30.45
but just being a mentor and
let them know... you know...
00:37:30.48\00:37:33.42
you are God's son,
you are God's daughter,
00:37:33.45\00:37:36.89
I believe that will
just give them this boost
00:37:36.92\00:37:39.99
like it did for me
because from that point,
00:37:40.06\00:37:42.52
things that had been
going to rejection...
00:37:42.56\00:37:45.03
and all of
that... to just going...
00:37:45.06\00:37:47.10
things have been
going good for me
00:37:47.13\00:37:49.43
Yvonne: Praise the
Lord, that's great,
00:37:49.46\00:37:51.77
just by calling you "son. "
00:37:51.80\00:37:54.84
Denry: That's it... that's all I
wanted to hear, all these years.
00:37:54.87\00:37:56.77
Did you tell him how
much it meant to you?
00:37:56.87\00:38:00.41
I kept it... I kept...
I guess I just kept it...
00:38:00.44\00:38:03.14
it was some... a joy
that I just had to share
00:38:03.18\00:38:05.68
but I need to tell him,
I do need to tell him...
00:38:05.71\00:38:07.82
I think it would be interesting,
00:38:07.85\00:38:09.18
I think it would be interesting
to see how he responds
00:38:09.22\00:38:12.52
to your letting him know
how much it meant to you.
00:38:12.55\00:38:15.92
Because I was
forced to call him "daddy"
00:38:15.96\00:38:18.63
because I used to
call him by his name
00:38:18.66\00:38:21.26
and my mother was like...
00:38:21.30\00:38:22.63
"He's going to be around for a
while could you call him daddy?"
00:38:22.66\00:38:25.90
I was like... ten years' old,
00:38:25.97\00:38:27.94
I was like, "He's
not my dad though"
00:38:27.97\00:38:29.50
and mom said,
"Could you call him daddy?"
00:38:29.54\00:38:31.01
I said, "Okay,
I'll call him daddy. "
00:38:31.04\00:38:32.51
But now, when I call him daddy,
00:38:32.54\00:38:35.14
that's my dad... he's my dad...
00:38:35.18\00:38:37.71
Yvonne: Hmmm...
hmmm... hmmm... hmmm...
00:38:37.75\00:38:39.41
I think that a lot of
times the men out there...
00:38:39.45\00:38:44.49
they're struggling with the past
00:38:44.52\00:38:47.96
so they can't even reach
out to their own children,
00:38:47.99\00:38:51.59
and we don't look at that angle,
00:38:51.66\00:38:53.50
I know, my dad meant
well, I know, for him,
00:38:53.53\00:38:57.33
is... provide...
I've got to provide...
00:38:57.37\00:39:01.10
and I have the same kind of
makeup... I've got to provide...
00:39:01.14\00:39:04.84
but I have a
balance through education,
00:39:04.87\00:39:09.04
through reading...
knowledge, just get a balance,
00:39:09.08\00:39:11.71
because I know,
"Yes, I have to provide...
00:39:11.75\00:39:13.45
but, I have to still spend time"
00:39:13.48\00:39:16.72
my son... now he's 19...
00:39:16.75\00:39:18.39
my daughter is 16...
00:39:18.42\00:39:20.12
and we have such an open
relationship in our home,
00:39:20.19\00:39:24.29
they can come, they can talk
00:39:24.36\00:39:26.46
and I'll be in my office
in the middle of a sermon
00:39:26.49\00:39:29.56
and this is about 11:30
00:39:29.60\00:39:32.20
and my son will
knock on the office door
00:39:32.23\00:39:35.07
I'd say, "Come on in... "
00:39:35.10\00:39:36.44
and that's the time he
wants to sit down and talk
00:39:36.47\00:39:38.27
and you know when
you're in the middle of...
00:39:38.31\00:39:41.08
you're absorbed...
you're in the Word...
00:39:41.11\00:39:43.45
and guess what I do? I stop...
00:39:43.48\00:39:46.31
I stop... he'll
sit there in my chair
00:39:46.35\00:39:50.19
and we'll just talk about
whatever he wants to talk about
00:39:50.22\00:39:54.26
until it's time for him to
00:39:54.29\00:39:56.29
just feel...
"Okay dad, I'm gone. "
00:39:56.32\00:39:59.33
That's what's
needed for fathers...
00:39:59.36\00:40:01.40
we need to just be
able to spend time with them
00:40:01.43\00:40:05.03
and listen to
them because I realized
00:40:05.07\00:40:07.24
from the time he was born until
age 19... time went so fast,
00:40:07.30\00:40:12.17
it just disappeared and I
realized that sooner or later,
00:40:12.21\00:40:17.11
he's going to
be out of the home,
00:40:17.15\00:40:18.81
my daughter's going
to be out of the home,
00:40:18.85\00:40:20.52
so I'm going to
invest all the time
00:40:20.58\00:40:24.72
that I possibly can with him,
00:40:24.75\00:40:27.02
because I don't want him
to... to have the same feelings
00:40:27.06\00:40:32.13
or the same things
that I went through,
00:40:32.16\00:40:34.00
I'm trying to
protect him from that.
00:40:34.03\00:40:36.06
One thing that my dad
did with us... is that
00:40:36.10\00:40:39.37
every year we
would get in the car...
00:40:39.40\00:40:41.17
we would drive 60 to 70 miles
00:40:41.20\00:40:44.14
to our other family home
00:40:44.17\00:40:47.51
and that is something
that is still within me.
00:40:47.54\00:40:50.91
It's amazing how some
of the things that you
00:40:50.95\00:40:54.25
you used to do with your father,
it's amazing how it just sticks.
00:40:54.28\00:40:58.95
As, every now and again...
00:40:58.99\00:41:00.96
I like to take
these long road trips
00:41:00.99\00:41:03.26
but my wife
doesn't like the car,
00:41:03.29\00:41:05.53
so it doesn't balance up,
00:41:05.56\00:41:08.73
I got into the car and said,
"Okay, we're going to Arizona,
00:41:08.76\00:41:11.03
we're going from Michigan
all the way to Arizona... "
00:41:11.07\00:41:13.60
I had the best time
00:41:13.64\00:41:15.07
but they didn't
have such a good time...
00:41:15.10\00:41:16.91
I was re-living my childhood and
I was just having a good time,
00:41:16.97\00:41:24.01
because... it was a time
where I felt close to my father
00:41:24.05\00:41:29.12
you know, we
just had a good time
00:41:29.15\00:41:30.85
but I think to
spending time is crucial,
00:41:30.89\00:41:34.76
I think we need to encourage
our fathers to spend time,
00:41:34.79\00:41:39.76
it's okay to
stop what you're doing
00:41:39.79\00:41:42.30
and let them know
that they're important.
00:41:42.33\00:41:44.63
You said a key
word, "Balance... "
00:41:44.67\00:41:48.10
now there are a lot of fathers
at home that don't know...
00:41:48.14\00:41:50.84
maybe... how to
have that balance,
00:41:50.87\00:41:53.54
what advice would you give them
00:41:53.61\00:41:56.21
to be able to
balance raising their kids?
00:41:56.24\00:42:00.42
Well, the advice I'll give
them is that... first of all...
00:42:00.45\00:42:03.28
you have to understand
that they're important,
00:42:03.39\00:42:05.45
they're first in your
life, I mean... besides God,
00:42:05.49\00:42:09.29
then, they're first
00:42:09.32\00:42:10.66
and, I think, be
able to understand that
00:42:10.73\00:42:13.93
and know that whenever
they want to have a conversation
00:42:14.00\00:42:18.67
or just play...
stop what you're doing
00:42:18.70\00:42:20.50
but yet it's going to only take
them about 10 to 15 minutes...
00:42:20.54\00:42:24.87
I noticed that with
children, 10 to 15 minutes...
00:42:24.91\00:42:27.98
30 minutes...
and they're gone...
00:42:28.01\00:42:30.11
they're off to the next thing
00:42:30.15\00:42:31.51
so now you can resume
your regular activities,
00:42:31.55\00:42:34.08
don't think that they're
going to be there forever
00:42:34.12\00:42:36.55
and you can't do
what you need to,
00:42:36.58\00:42:38.49
so, you have to be able
to find that balance though
00:42:38.55\00:42:40.02
a little time for my children
00:42:40.06\00:42:41.59
and a little time
where I can get back to work
00:42:41.62\00:42:44.53
or do what I need
to do. Yvonne: Hmmm...
00:42:44.56\00:42:45.89
I think too,
one of the things...
00:42:45.93\00:42:48.36
going back to what Pastor
Denry and Jason talked about,
00:42:48.40\00:42:51.37
you know my four-year-old
comes from a divorced home,
00:42:51.40\00:42:54.30
my ex-wife and I
are not together,
00:42:54.34\00:42:56.10
I'm remarried to
Brittany, we talked about it,
00:42:56.14\00:42:59.37
we have a new-born
baby and everything
00:42:59.41\00:43:01.38
and it was important
00:43:01.41\00:43:03.21
as a lot of times,
parents get divorced
00:43:03.24\00:43:05.95
and their fathers divorce
the kids at the same time.
00:43:05.98\00:43:07.95
Yvonne: Hmmm...
a very good point.
00:43:07.98\00:43:09.72
To me it's like...
and it's not easy...
00:43:09.75\00:43:12.09
but you know what?
00:43:12.12\00:43:13.46
Just because you two couldn't
work out your issues on things
00:43:13.49\00:43:16.93
just... they didn't happen
00:43:16.96\00:43:18.29
because that's not
the way God intended,
00:43:18.33\00:43:20.10
doesn't mean
you can't get along,
00:43:20.13\00:43:21.73
you're adults to your children
and we have a dynamic in which
00:43:21.76\00:43:26.80
yeah, you have your
bad times and good times
00:43:26.84\00:43:28.90
but your children feel it
even if they don't see it.
00:43:28.94\00:43:32.21
They feel it and for me...
it's critical that I maintain a
00:43:32.24\00:43:35.68
good co-parental
relationship with my ex-wife
00:43:35.71\00:43:38.75
and my wife now, she knows that
00:43:38.78\00:43:40.78
and she helps
me through that too
00:43:40.82\00:43:42.55
we pray for me
and we pray together
00:43:42.58\00:43:44.29
and we pray for her
as well, and you know,
00:43:44.32\00:43:46.86
my daughter is pretty
much... my wife's daughter too.
00:43:46.92\00:43:50.79
There's no
step-parent, step-parent,
00:43:50.83\00:43:53.96
step-daughter relationship,
that's her daughter as well,
00:43:54.00\00:43:56.16
they love each other,
they spend time together,
00:43:56.20\00:43:58.47
when our newborn
was born, I was like,
00:43:58.50\00:44:01.07
"Can you take
her for a little bit
00:44:01.10\00:44:02.87
so I can spend time with Andrea
00:44:02.94\00:44:04.67
for a little bit,
that's my four-year-old...
00:44:04.71\00:44:07.81
spend time a
little bit with her,
00:44:07.88\00:44:09.38
so that way we can
bond" and to me that was...
00:44:09.41\00:44:14.12
to me that's important
00:44:14.15\00:44:15.48
and just getting
along and just being there,
00:44:15.52\00:44:17.89
my dad taught me... like I said,
00:44:17.92\00:44:20.16
"No matter how tired you are,
00:44:20.19\00:44:22.39
you always spend
time with your kids"
00:44:22.42\00:44:23.83
and sometimes I come
home from a full day of work
00:44:23.86\00:44:27.00
and I'm exhausted,
I mean, I'm worn out,
00:44:27.03\00:44:30.07
and I pick up my
four-year-old from school
00:44:30.13\00:44:33.13
and I... she'll be like,
00:44:33.17\00:44:34.50
"Daddy, can I go
and eat some sushi?"
00:44:34.54\00:44:36.44
Because she likes
sushi, the avocado rolls,
00:44:36.47\00:44:39.87
so we go... and
we go get some sushi
00:44:39.91\00:44:42.01
and we sit down and we talk,
00:44:42.04\00:44:43.41
we always make time in our
household to talk to our kids,
00:44:43.45\00:44:47.02
and to listen,
even though she's four,
00:44:47.08\00:44:49.68
even though the newborn is
a newborn... two months' old,
00:44:49.72\00:44:52.52
they talk to us and we listen
00:44:52.59\00:44:55.86
and we want to dedicate and
build the time with them now
00:44:55.89\00:44:59.96
and spend time with
them... and always...
00:45:00.06\00:45:02.13
it's difficult for
me because they're girls
00:45:02.20\00:45:04.27
and it's like... my daughter...
00:45:04.30\00:45:06.37
my oldest one wants to play
dress-up or tiara and I'm like
00:45:06.40\00:45:10.24
"Mmmm... I don't want to
play that... but okay... "
00:45:10.31\00:45:13.01
she puts a little tiara
on my head and I'm like,
00:45:13.04\00:45:15.48
"All right...
what do we do now?"
00:45:15.51\00:45:16.85
You know, sometimes, I've
grabbed the kitchen chairs
00:45:16.88\00:45:21.15
and blankets and made
a princess castle for her
00:45:21.18\00:45:24.49
and just put her over
the TV so she has a...
00:45:24.52\00:45:27.26
a big-screen
TV... right there...
00:45:27.29\00:45:29.26
a TV and princess
castle all together...
00:45:29.29\00:45:31.36
we order pizza and
the whole family...
00:45:31.39\00:45:33.50
we just sit under
the... my wife is like...
00:45:33.53\00:45:35.06
"You're going to
have to clean this up"
00:45:35.10\00:45:36.56
I'm like... "No problem,"
00:45:36.63\00:45:38.77
we sit underneath
the little castle,
00:45:38.80\00:45:40.90
we have a
sleepover and we eat pizza
00:45:40.94\00:45:43.00
and we just sit there and
watch her movies that she likes
00:45:43.04\00:45:45.84
and... you know...
it doesn't take a lot...
00:45:45.87\00:45:49.04
they don't expect you...
the expectations they have
00:45:49.08\00:45:52.91
for you as a
father and that you feel
00:45:52.95\00:45:55.42
only come from outside,
00:45:55.45\00:45:56.99
the expectations that they
have for you are very minimal,
00:45:57.05\00:46:00.59
they just want you to be there
and I remember listening to
00:46:00.62\00:46:04.06
two young girls
talking about it,
00:46:04.16\00:46:05.49
in the University,
they were talking about...
00:46:05.53\00:46:09.33
one of them was talking about
how her parents were divorced
00:46:09.36\00:46:11.33
and all she wanted to do was...
for her dad... just to call her
00:46:11.37\00:46:14.47
or send her a
letter or something
00:46:14.50\00:46:16.91
and to me... that's critical...
just to be there for my child
00:46:16.94\00:46:21.54
and make sure that
she knows she's loved
00:46:21.58\00:46:23.95
and mom... even though
mom and dad are not together
00:46:23.98\00:46:26.65
they both love her and
they can be there for her
00:46:26.72\00:46:29.32
and that's just critical
for me to make sure I do that.
00:46:29.35\00:46:32.79
And what you're doing
is... you're making memories
00:46:32.82\00:46:35.59
with your
children, things that...
00:46:35.62\00:46:37.99
just like your
trip with your dad
00:46:38.03\00:46:40.33
has been in your
heart all of these years
00:46:40.40\00:46:43.37
you want to do
that with your kids
00:46:43.43\00:46:46.23
you want to create memories
00:46:46.27\00:46:48.34
so that they have
something to draw from
00:46:48.37\00:46:50.51
later in life and I just
think that's so beautiful.
00:46:50.57\00:46:53.14
So I'm going to get back
to my original question again
00:46:53.17\00:46:55.74
why is a father important?
00:46:55.78\00:46:58.95
why can't it
just be the mother...
00:46:58.98\00:47:01.08
mother... I
mean... the dad's not there
00:47:01.12\00:47:03.52
and then... why does a
father need to have input
00:47:03.55\00:47:07.32
into the children's lives?
00:47:07.39\00:47:09.59
When you look at...
00:47:09.62\00:47:11.46
I worked in Mental
Health in a juvenile facility,
00:47:11.49\00:47:14.96
and most of them...
if not all of them...
00:47:15.00\00:47:18.00
had some kind of
problem with the father
00:47:18.03\00:47:21.44
father wasn't
there, father was deceased,
00:47:21.47\00:47:24.84
father was in prison,
father was also in gangs,
00:47:24.87\00:47:28.14
father was abusive to the mom,
00:47:28.18\00:47:30.65
most of the
conversations I had with them
00:47:30.68\00:47:33.92
were their fathers...
00:47:33.95\00:47:35.28
and it's interesting
how God designed the Bible
00:47:35.32\00:47:40.06
I mean, God is... He is God
00:47:40.09\00:47:43.43
and He chooses
to play the father
00:47:43.46\00:47:48.00
you know, he could
have said something else,
00:47:48.03\00:47:51.50
but he chooses a
father, and I really believe
00:47:51.53\00:47:54.94
that... because He's all-knowing
and knows the future,
00:47:55.00\00:47:59.31
He knew that there would be
a problem with the male figures
00:47:59.34\00:48:02.64
in our Society and
so... therefore, He says,
00:48:02.71\00:48:07.08
"Look, I will step in
and be that father now...
00:48:07.15\00:48:11.42
so point them to me and
I will repair the damage"
00:48:11.45\00:48:15.76
you know, but
you've talked to everyone,
00:48:15.79\00:48:17.39
even perfect homes, they'll say,
00:48:17.46\00:48:20.56
"Yeah, my father was
good... " whatever...
00:48:20.63\00:48:21.93
but they'd want more
00:48:21.96\00:48:25.10
and you look at
Mother's and Father's Day,
00:48:25.13\00:48:28.27
we give our mothers
accolades, we love them,
00:48:28.30\00:48:31.41
we give all the flowers,
00:48:31.44\00:48:32.77
we were talking the
other day about... in prison
00:48:32.81\00:48:36.48
how on Mother's
Days... every phone is full...
00:48:36.51\00:48:40.15
there are lines for phones,
00:48:40.22\00:48:41.55
but for Father's Day...
00:48:41.58\00:48:42.92
you can hear almost
like a cricket making noise,
00:48:42.95\00:48:45.99
and so there's a serious void
from... problem with the father.
00:48:46.02\00:48:49.52
I do think the
father is important
00:48:49.56\00:48:52.13
because we see God through
the eyes of our earthly father
00:48:52.16\00:48:56.93
and that's just
00:48:56.97\00:48:59.30
how we see God
00:48:59.33\00:49:01.70
but when we have a
problem with our earthly father
00:49:01.74\00:49:04.54
we see God the same way,
00:49:04.57\00:49:05.91
there's a...
then... direct relationship
00:49:05.94\00:49:09.88
between the Heavenly
Father and the earthly father
00:49:09.91\00:49:13.01
so fathers are important,
they're the anchor for the home,
00:49:13.05\00:49:16.92
mothers are the nourishers
00:49:16.95\00:49:18.29
so fathers are
important in the home
00:49:18.32\00:49:21.59
to anchor that family,
00:49:21.62\00:49:23.26
fathers are the
priests of the home
00:49:23.32\00:49:25.59
they're the ones
that are responsible
00:49:25.66\00:49:27.93
for taking their
children to the Lord
00:49:27.96\00:49:30.27
and praying for
them without that...
00:49:30.30\00:49:33.67
in the home... we
will lose our children
00:49:33.74\00:49:36.81
so it's very, very important for
us to have fathers in the home
00:49:36.84\00:49:40.88
then there needs to be
00:49:40.91\00:49:43.38
some kind of understanding
00:49:43.45\00:49:45.81
in our male generation
that they're important.
00:49:45.85\00:49:48.42
I don't think
they're important...
00:49:48.45\00:49:49.78
they've been devalued
so much that they feel
00:49:49.82\00:49:54.16
that they're no longer important
00:49:54.19\00:49:56.12
but they are important...
they need to be known,
00:49:56.16\00:49:59.19
they need to
stand up and be fathers
00:49:59.26\00:50:01.83
instead of allowing the mothers
to be fathers and mothers
00:50:01.90\00:50:07.74
and what has happened in Society
00:50:07.77\00:50:09.80
because of sin and
because of all the other things,
00:50:09.84\00:50:12.57
mothers have taken
the role of fathers
00:50:12.61\00:50:15.58
so the boys are
now... no longer...
00:50:15.61\00:50:18.51
have that strength
that a father should have,
00:50:18.55\00:50:22.18
that gentleness also
that a father should have
00:50:22.22\00:50:25.75
because they're now all...
mothers have been raised by moms
00:50:25.79\00:50:30.63
so that's the...
there's no balance... yes...
00:50:30.69\00:50:34.60
And that is a major point
00:50:34.63\00:50:36.73
because one of the things
that I'm seeing as a woman...
00:50:36.80\00:50:39.43
and I look across a
field of young men...
00:50:39.47\00:50:43.67
who have not had their
fathers in their lives...
00:50:43.74\00:50:47.24
they take on a role of,
00:50:47.31\00:50:50.08
"You as the
woman... should support me...
00:50:50.18\00:50:53.55
you as the woman
should take care of me,
00:50:53.58\00:50:56.92
I'm going to sit here
and play my video games
00:50:56.95\00:50:59.89
while you go out to work...
because that's what mom did... "
00:50:59.92\00:51:02.22
so, it's... it's... they have no
idea of what the role of the man
00:51:02.26\00:51:07.03
is to be... the provider...
and the... you know...
00:51:07.10\00:51:10.83
people will probably blow about
me saying that this is a...
00:51:10.87\00:51:14.54
there might blow
about me saying that
00:51:14.57\00:51:16.57
"man should be the provider"
because I believe in roles...
00:51:16.60\00:51:19.64
Pastor: Yes, some
people will say that...
00:51:19.67\00:51:21.88
It is... it is... but
it's not politically correct
00:51:21.94\00:51:24.85
and so... but I
do... I do... feel that...
00:51:24.88\00:51:27.98
the role of the man
has been so played down
00:51:28.02\00:51:32.29
into this
dependent kind of thing
00:51:32.32\00:51:34.99
where the man
should be independent
00:51:35.02\00:51:37.63
and should be the
one that is out there...
00:51:37.66\00:51:40.66
he should come
home to this haven...
00:51:40.70\00:51:43.80
Yes, it should be a
little piece of heaven
00:51:43.90\00:51:47.47
but I think with the
roles getting confused
00:51:47.50\00:51:50.97
and all that stuff...
00:51:51.01\00:51:52.34
I think that sometimes you have
00:51:52.37\00:51:54.44
really independent
women who... it's like when
00:51:54.51\00:51:59.25
the roles get so
confused on both sides too...
00:51:59.28\00:52:05.52
and going back to being
in a home with no father,
00:52:05.55\00:52:11.63
you miss out on the interaction
that a man should have
00:52:11.66\00:52:14.46
with his wife and how
he should treat a woman
00:52:14.50\00:52:18.87
and if it's a little girl...
she is missing out on seeing
00:52:18.90\00:52:22.54
how she should
be treated by a man
00:52:22.57\00:52:25.24
and that's... that's...
crucial, that's crucial...
00:52:25.27\00:52:29.68
It's actually interesting
too because not only does the
00:52:29.71\00:52:33.15
girl miss out on how
a man should treat her
00:52:33.18\00:52:36.79
but she also misses out on
how she should treat her husband
00:52:36.85\00:52:39.69
which is critical...
it's a two-way street
00:52:39.72\00:52:44.09
and I know we live
in a Society in which
00:52:44.13\00:52:48.43
we have strong women and...
00:52:48.46\00:52:50.03
but there was a reason why God
took Eve out of the side of Adam
00:52:50.10\00:52:54.77
to bring that journey together,
00:52:54.80\00:52:57.97
there are a lot of women around
walking with a missing rib
00:52:58.01\00:53:02.18
and these girls are
learning the wrong things to do,
00:53:02.21\00:53:07.22
the men are learning
the wrong things to do
00:53:07.25\00:53:08.72
and they're just creating chaos
00:53:08.75\00:53:10.62
over one simple
little thing which is,
00:53:10.69\00:53:13.76
"Take
responsibility and be there"
00:53:13.79\00:53:16.73
you don't have to be
perfect, there are no manuals,
00:53:16.76\00:53:20.13
you don't know what
to do but that's okay.
00:53:20.20\00:53:22.40
There's a heavenly Father
who can teach you what to do
00:53:22.43\00:53:25.73
step by step...
00:53:25.77\00:53:27.40
And there are
programs too out there...
00:53:27.44\00:53:30.91
I know... I've
been in touch with
00:53:30.94\00:53:34.04
the Brother from
Fathers Incorporated...
00:53:34.08\00:53:37.21
I mean... there are
all kinds of programs
00:53:37.25\00:53:40.28
and resources out there for
people who want to know more
00:53:40.32\00:53:43.95
and I know you guys are
going to be doing some things
00:53:44.05\00:53:47.66
in the communities and
in the churches and all
00:53:47.69\00:53:50.53
to help men who want
to be better fathers.
00:53:50.59\00:53:53.36
Speaking of A Father's Heart,
00:53:53.40\00:53:55.36
tell us what we can
expect from this Season.
00:53:55.40\00:53:58.47
Reality... no holding
back... no sugar coating...
00:53:58.50\00:54:03.54
you're going to
see three broken men
00:54:03.61\00:54:06.44
who don't really
know how to be fathers
00:54:06.47\00:54:10.05
but yet we rely on
the Heavenly Father
00:54:10.08\00:54:13.55
and we also rely on each
other for fathering strategies
00:54:13.62\00:54:17.39
stepping out of the...
00:54:17.42\00:54:19.39
"we can't share our
emotions as men... " but we can
00:54:19.42\00:54:23.22
and share
strategies through talking and
00:54:23.29\00:54:25.76
we learn how to make each
other better fathers as a group.
00:54:25.83\00:54:29.53
That's good... what do you
think about this season coming?
00:54:29.56\00:54:33.23
I think the season is a
great thing that we can actually
00:54:33.30\00:54:36.91
talk so openly, I think,
00:54:36.97\00:54:38.74
this is the biggest
counseling team for me
00:54:38.77\00:54:42.41
I have given birth to
things that I don't talk about
00:54:42.44\00:54:47.08
and I thank God that
they're here to listen
00:54:47.12\00:54:51.02
I'm hoping and praying that
00:54:51.05\00:54:53.32
people will be
impacted in such a way
00:54:53.42\00:54:56.36
that they can just
breath... exhale...
00:54:56.39\00:54:59.33
and all the things that
have been holding them back
00:54:59.36\00:55:02.50
from being the
best possible father
00:55:02.53\00:55:04.70
this season is going
to be a great season.
00:55:04.77\00:55:07.24
I know lives are
going to be changed
00:55:07.27\00:55:10.01
and I know God
is going to just...
00:55:10.04\00:55:11.97
because there's such
realness, well... it's real...
00:55:12.04\00:55:15.18
what you see is what you get.
00:55:15.21\00:55:17.88
What do you think, Denry?
00:55:17.95\00:55:20.62
I believe, we're going
to reveal the secret manual
00:55:20.65\00:55:23.02
that there is a
manual but He is a person...
00:55:23.05\00:55:26.86
and He's God the
Father and He's full of love,
00:55:26.96\00:55:30.23
He's full of
guidance, He's full of wisdom
00:55:30.26\00:55:33.50
and we can use Him even
if you didn't have an example
00:55:33.60\00:55:37.43
you can look at
Him as an example
00:55:37.47\00:55:39.87
and trust me... the
rewards in your children
00:55:39.90\00:55:43.20
are going to be
beyond the atmosphere
00:55:43.24\00:55:45.84
because He's so loving,
00:55:45.87\00:55:47.24
so I'm looking
forward to this season.
00:55:47.28\00:55:50.05
Yeah... what do you think Jay...
you've had a chance to sit in
00:55:50.11\00:55:54.28
on the tapings
of A Father's Heart,
00:55:54.32\00:55:58.22
what do you think...
as a potential father?
00:55:58.25\00:56:00.79
Well, I don't
know... we'll see...
00:56:00.82\00:56:02.72
Pastor: Kind of scared him...
00:56:02.76\00:56:06.09
Yvonne: Yeah, I know,
he looks a little nervous.
00:56:06.13\00:56:08.23
I mean that's a
huge responsibility
00:56:08.26\00:56:10.67
but I think that...
what our Viewers can expect
00:56:10.70\00:56:14.17
from this program is so
much wonderful information,
00:56:14.24\00:56:17.64
things that may be
they have never experienced
00:56:17.67\00:56:21.64
themselves due to the
absence of a father...
00:56:21.68\00:56:24.58
they can expect to see
00:56:24.61\00:56:25.98
you guys being very
open and transparent
00:56:26.01\00:56:29.78
and being vulnerable
and sharing with them
00:56:29.82\00:56:32.99
the difficulties
that you went through
00:56:33.02\00:56:36.02
and how you were
able to overcome that
00:56:36.06\00:56:39.03
and how that translated into
your raising of your children.
00:56:39.06\00:56:44.77
It's such a great Series,
00:56:44.80\00:56:49.27
I can't wait for
our Viewers to watch it.
00:56:49.30\00:56:51.87
It was worth the
wait, I have to say that
00:56:51.91\00:56:54.41
all these years we've
been trying to get it going...
00:56:54.44\00:56:58.25
and finally it's
here... A Father's Heart is here
00:56:58.28\00:57:01.88
and I want to thank you
for all that you're doing
00:57:01.92\00:57:05.32
for A Father's Heart
00:57:05.35\00:57:07.39
and all that
you're going to be doing
00:57:07.42\00:57:10.19
because I know you're going
to be getting into the Community
00:57:10.26\00:57:12.66
so Viewers... you have to
make sure that you tune in...
00:57:12.69\00:57:15.10
this is going to be
a tremendous blessing.
00:57:15.13\00:57:18.00
Pastor: Amen.
00:57:18.03\00:57:19.37
That interview
nearly brought me to tears.
00:57:19.40\00:57:23.24
You'll really enjoy this program
00:57:23.27\00:57:25.47
so watch the
schedule for when it airs
00:57:25.51\00:57:27.74
if you have any questions or
to contact these dads directly,
00:57:27.81\00:57:31.31
please e-mail
them at: afh@3abn. org
00:57:31.38\00:57:36.38
that's: afh@3abn. org
00:57:36.42\00:57:39.89
what a blessing they are,
00:57:39.92\00:57:43.32
how transparent they
were, how authentic they are
00:57:43.36\00:57:47.23
and when you
watch these programs,
00:57:47.30\00:57:49.10
you'll be able
to see for yourself
00:57:49.13\00:57:50.93
that they know they
don't have all the answers
00:57:50.97\00:57:53.70
but they know that
Jesus is the answer
00:57:53.74\00:57:55.90
and that He will
lead them through.
00:57:55.94\00:57:58.37
Well, thank you so
much for joining us,
00:57:58.41\00:58:00.64
join us next time
because you know what?
00:58:00.71\00:58:03.08
It just wouldn't be
the same without you.
00:58:03.11\00:58:05.48