There is a secret sin that
has taken a hold of the church.
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Stay tuned to
find out what it is.
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My name is Yvonne
Lewis and I'm Jason Bradley
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and you're
watching Urban Report.
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Hello and welcome to a special
one-hour edition of Urban Report
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I have my co-host,
Jason Bradley, with me...
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yeah... Jays...
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and we have a very
special guest today,
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Lance Brown...
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Lance is no
stranger to Urban Report.
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I've interviewed him
on two other occasions.
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He is a Lay Evangelist
who is on fire for God.
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Recently, I was talking to him
and he mentioned the strong hold
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that sexual sin
has on the church,
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I told him that we should do
a program about this very topic.
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Welcome Brother Lance.
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God be praised, Sister Yvonne.
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It's so good to have you
here, you are a blessing.
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And we also have with us
via Skype, Dr. John Jacob.
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He's an Author
and a Psychotherapist
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and he's also the host
of Dare to Dream's Program,
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Road to Romance,
welcome Dr. Jacob.
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Thank you Dr.
Lewis, nice to be here.
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It's so good to
have you with us.
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Today we're going to
discuss the silent sin.
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According to the National
Association of Evangelicals,
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80 percent of unmarried,
Evangelical Christians
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between ages 18 to 29
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admit to having
had premarital sex.
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80 percent... and you
know, there are some aspects
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of sex and sexual addiction that
many people are not aware of
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so we invited Dr. Jacob in
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to talk about
the Chemistry of sex,
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to talk about what
happens in the human body
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during sexual arousal,
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now, some people might
feel a little uncomfortable
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having young
children watch this program,
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if you do, send
them into another room
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but make sure you watch
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this is a
critical, critical, program,
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so Dr. Jacob,
let's start with you
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because you have
some vital information
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about the Chemistry of sex
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and what happens to two
people chemically and hormonally
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when they are involved
in a sexual relationship.
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Tell us a bit about that.
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Yes, I've heard your statistic,
80 percent, that's pretty high,
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that's alarming, actually,
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sexual sin... or let's
just call it sexual addiction
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it's like any other addiction,
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basically what it
means is you're better off
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never having touched the
stuff, you know how that goes,
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never having
started in the first place,
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what it does to your
brain is mind blowing
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and difficult to recover
from and as you each would know,
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it requires a lot of
God's grace and a lot of prayer
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to reverse a situation
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that didn't need to be
started in the first place.
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So what you're saying is...
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and let me see if
I'm clear on this,
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what you're saying is,
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"If you never
begin that whole journey,
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it's so much better for you"
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unless it's within the
context of marriage, of course.
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We're not talking about
the God-ordained place for sex,
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we're talking about
premarital or extramarital sex,
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so what you're saying is,
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"It's better to not
start that whole thing
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because once you do,
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you can get very
caught up into it," correct?
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Yes, that's correct,
scientifically speaking,
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there's a difference
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between the
brains of a young person
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that has never had
sex, and one that has,
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so the first time
someone actually engages
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in sexual intercourse,
there are receptors in the brain
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that open for the first
time and they're opening because
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they're opening to
absorb the hormones,
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we have about eight hormones
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that are associated
with dating and marriage
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and so, some of those hormones
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are never released and
never absorbed into the body
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until those receptors are open
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now, once those
receptors are open...
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they do not close back.
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so what you have is, you
have the young person who
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thinks to themselves,
"Okay, I love this guy,
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I'm going to do
what he asks," you know,
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"I'm just going
to do this once,"
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but it never works
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and it doesn't work
because the receptors
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that open to
receive the hormones
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associated with that
activity are the same receptors
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that open to receive hormones
associated with Cocaine...
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Wow... Wow...
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So, these hormones are
addicting... very addicting,
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which is why, once they start,
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most of those 80 percent that
you mentioned will not stop.
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Now, they may have
started because of love,
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but here's the
thing, you have no guarantee
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that the person that you
decided to go that far with
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is going to stick with
you and follow this through
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to that natural progression,
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doing the right thing,
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getting into a
committed relationship,
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finally, one day...
proposing to you and, you know,
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walking with
you up to that alter
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you have no way to know that
that person is going to do that
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because that individual
doesn't know it, themselves.
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Look at what you just said,
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that there is some
powerful information in there,
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first of all,
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all of these
hormones that come into play,
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during that sexual act,
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God gave us those to
bind us to our spouse,
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but... this...
what you're saying is,
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once that cascade starts...
if it's not with your spouse,
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then you are... kind
of connected in a sense,
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chemically to that person...
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in other words... they
initiate a chemical response
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within the body
that was not intended
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for anyone other than
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the person that
you are married to.
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Correct... Is that correct?
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That's correct,
and you're right,
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those hormones were
never created... to date...
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they're not for
dating, you know,
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our first parents weren't given
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dating opportunities
if you know what I mean
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they were married on the
day that they were created
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and they were
given these hormones
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for marriage, not for dating...
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That's powerful,
that is powerful.
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So, let's talk about
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some of those
hormones and what they do.
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Okay, so we have
about eight hormones
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and basically they have
four main things that they do
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bonding is one,
blinding is another,
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addicting is another,
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and
novelty-seeking is the fourth.
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What was the fourth?
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Novelty seeking...
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so, they're responsible
for you wanting "newness"
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in a relationship,
in your relationship
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which is why, if we
only looked at marriages
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even marriages, of
course, in trouble,
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you know, today we're
talking about the singles,
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but married people are also
in trouble... in part because
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they neglect the novelty,
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so, they say, after
about nine years of marriage,
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most marriages
begin to run afoul
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because one partner
or maybe both partners
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say that they're feeling bored,
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so in Year Nine of marriage,
boredom is the biggest complaint
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not infidelity,
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so the hormones
that we were given were
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intended for us to
keep our relationships fresh
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and keep our
relationships alive,
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now take that out of
the context of marriage,
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and you have two young
people that are not married
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and guess what
the young man uses...
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novelty-seeking hormone four,
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they use it to keep going
from flower to flower to flower
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to flower and
actually get addicted
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to the novelty of it.
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Hmmm...
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So, promiscuity...
you don't think that...
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that novelty-seeking hormone
can create infidelity or do you?
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Well, it does, it does,
if partners are not careful
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to always keep
their relationships fresh
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you know, of
course, stay prayed up
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you've got to
take all the defenses
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and all the
measures that you can
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but a lot of relationships
do just the opposite
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couples do just the opposite,
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"Oh, finally I have my husband
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so now, I can wear my
rollers... every night. "
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No, no, no...
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"I'm good, I'm good,
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he signed on the dotted
line... where can he go?
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He's not going to go anywhere,
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so... here are the rollers...
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and here I am looking in ways
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that I would never present
to my friends on the outside"
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and so... you
get stuck in this rut
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instead of keeping it fresh
and exciting for your partner
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and that causes some problems,
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now, if you
switch that as I said,
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to the singles, we've
actually discovered...
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scientifically...
we've discovered
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that your body actually
responds to those hormones
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differently... if you
are serious about the person,
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that if you were
just in it for a fling,
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for a good time, for
another notch on the belt
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your body actually knows.
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Wow! so how does
it... what's the difference,
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what's the
difference in the response?
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Well the difference is
this, you engage... sexually
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and if you did not come in
with the frame of mind that
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you know, "I'm really
in love with this person,
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this is the person
that I'm interested in"
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especially for men,
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there's a hormone
called Vasopressin
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and it's sort of
the opposite of Oxytocin
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now, Vasopressin does the
same thing that Oxytocin does
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which is... it's
responsible for the bonding
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but here's the thing,
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if you went into this
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and you weren't 100 percent
sure that this is the person
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you wanted to spend
the rest of your life with,
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there is a strong possibility
that right after the act,
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Vasopressin causes
you to feel repulsed
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by the very person
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that you thought you were in
love with... prior to the act.
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Jason, there's a
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woman in the
Bible... it was actually,
00:10:32.79\00:10:34.53
I can't remember her name,
but it was David's daughter
00:10:34.56\00:10:38.03
her half-brother,
Amnon, was in love with her
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and ended up
raping her and shaming her
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and right after the act,
immediately after the act,
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all the love that he
had for her... dissipated...
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it was gone and he
hated her, the Bible said,
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and that is similar
to what Doc is saying
00:11:01.72\00:11:04.69
with this
hormone... that initially,
00:11:04.73\00:11:07.30
there can be a
lot of love there,
00:11:07.36\00:11:09.83
but immediately, it can be gone,
00:11:09.86\00:11:12.30
that is really powerful!
00:11:12.33\00:11:15.10
So, a couple more hormones, Doc,
00:11:15.14\00:11:19.04
and then I want to bring Lance
in to talk about his experience.
00:11:19.07\00:11:22.94
Okay, so some of the addiction
00:11:22.98\00:11:26.78
comes from the
fact... like any addiction
00:11:26.82\00:11:28.25
that there is a
reward for taking it.
00:11:28.28\00:11:30.79
If you're
addicted to a substance,
00:11:30.82\00:11:33.22
your brain rewards
everything you take it,
00:11:33.25\00:11:35.92
if you're addicted to sex,
the sex becomes an addiction
00:11:35.96\00:11:39.46
which, very often it does,
there are centers in your brain
00:11:39.49\00:11:42.10
the same receptors, and they use
00:11:42.13\00:11:44.40
certain other hormones
like dopamine, norepinephrine,
00:11:44.43\00:11:49.34
and the combination of these,
is powerful, it's addicting,
00:11:49.37\00:11:54.18
and it's rewarding
00:11:54.21\00:11:55.54
and its' the reward
that your body seeks
00:11:55.58\00:11:57.45
over and over and
over, so the problem is this,
00:11:57.48\00:11:59.35
if you attach
yourself to someone
00:11:59.38\00:12:01.12
and you become
sexually involved,
00:12:01.15\00:12:02.78
and your brain
begins to get this reward,
00:12:02.82\00:12:04.75
your receptors are
open for the first time
00:12:04.79\00:12:06.59
and then you have that
00:12:06.62\00:12:08.19
"Amnon experience"
where... the brother,
00:12:08.22\00:12:09.96
as soon as he's done, he's like,
00:12:10.03\00:12:11.36
"This was a mistake... I don't
really feel this way about you,"
00:12:11.39\00:12:13.46
the problem is,
00:12:13.50\00:12:14.96
you also have that
last hormone, Oxytocin...
00:12:15.00\00:12:18.77
that is
responsible for the bonding,
00:12:18.83\00:12:20.70
and remember it bonds
us together like superglue
00:12:20.74\00:12:24.04
when God put it
into Adam and Eve,
00:12:24.07\00:12:25.97
it had to be so strong
00:12:26.01\00:12:27.34
that Adam and Eve would
be able to stay together
00:12:27.38\00:12:29.98
for eternity, that's
how strong that glue is,
00:12:30.01\00:12:33.18
so imagine now, we,
in this fallen state,
00:12:33.21\00:12:36.32
that we are in, and we
still have the same glue,
00:12:36.35\00:12:37.95
it didn't change,
but now we're using it
00:12:37.99\00:12:40.02
and I believe the enemy
is using it in such a way
00:12:40.06\00:12:43.02
to have us bound to individuals
00:12:43.06\00:12:46.16
who really don't have
our best interests at heart,
00:12:46.19\00:12:48.03
so, what happens?
00:12:48.06\00:12:49.80
You're attached
to this young man
00:12:49.83\00:12:52.03
as we know, sexual
intercourse produces
00:12:52.07\00:12:54.94
five times more Oxytocin...
that bonding hormone,
00:12:54.97\00:12:57.94
than anything
else, five times...
00:12:57.97\00:13:00.21
very, very, very strong,
00:13:00.24\00:13:01.74
so by the time you're done,
00:13:01.78\00:13:03.21
he gets this signal from
his brain that tells him,
00:13:03.24\00:13:05.65
"She's not the
one... " he walks away...
00:13:05.68\00:13:07.82
you're left there
with a broken heart
00:13:07.85\00:13:09.88
because your heart is
really still attached to his,
00:13:09.92\00:13:12.85
he's walked away with it,
he has your heart with him,
00:13:12.89\00:13:15.76
and you're sitting there,
00:13:15.79\00:13:17.13
what's the big deal
about that, what's the problem?
00:13:17.16\00:13:19.13
The Problem is...
maybe the next person
00:13:19.16\00:13:21.86
that would show up next
Saturday... next Sabbath,
00:13:21.90\00:13:25.00
right there... was the one that
God had intended but guess what?
00:13:25.03\00:13:28.70
You are not
available because emotionally
00:13:28.77\00:13:31.04
your heart is
still with that young man
00:13:31.07\00:13:33.34
who was trifling and,
you know, just took off.
00:13:33.38\00:13:35.81
So it really is Russian Roulette
when young people decide
00:13:35.84\00:13:40.08
to play with sin and
play with sex, in particular,
00:13:40.12\00:13:43.69
because it leaves them, I think,
00:13:43.72\00:13:45.25
in a very, very,
very desperate state.
00:13:45.32\00:13:48.52
Thank you so
much, that is so rich,
00:13:48.56\00:13:51.73
that's powerful, isn't it Jay?
00:13:51.76\00:13:53.13
Yeah, that sounds
like the "lust hormone"
00:13:53.16\00:13:56.10
or like the hormone
for one-night stands
00:13:56.13\00:13:58.97
or something like that
because people get involved
00:13:59.00\00:14:02.20
and then they're gone.
00:14:02.24\00:14:03.57
Hmmm... hmmm... hmmm...
hmmm... the one-night stand...
00:14:03.61\00:14:05.74
let's talk about your testimony,
00:14:05.77\00:14:08.68
you have a very
interesting journey,
00:14:08.74\00:14:11.01
share that with us if you would.
00:14:11.05\00:14:13.28
You know when Dr.
John was speaking about
00:14:13.31\00:14:17.19
those hormones and things
that trigger in a child's mind,
00:14:17.22\00:14:20.46
I couldn't help but in
thinking about my experience,
00:14:20.49\00:14:23.69
you know, as I had shared
before that when I was a child,
00:14:23.73\00:14:28.53
growing up in the rural
hills of the West Indies,
00:14:28.56\00:14:31.10
there were a couple of
attractions for us as children,
00:14:31.13\00:14:35.60
some of them,
we would never try,
00:14:35.64\00:14:36.97
you know, I was
growing up in the hills
00:14:37.01\00:14:39.14
of the West Indies in Jamaica,
00:14:39.17\00:14:40.51
and up in the
hills where we were,
00:14:40.54\00:14:42.44
Marijuana grew wild
00:14:42.48\00:14:44.41
and we saw the
effects of that on people,
00:14:44.45\00:14:46.78
White Rum was a
product of Jamaica
00:14:46.82\00:14:48.82
because of the
sugar plantations,
00:14:48.85\00:14:50.69
but we could see what happened,
00:14:50.72\00:14:52.52
but another export from
Jamaica was Reggae music,
00:14:52.55\00:14:56.66
now, our house was
right next to a local bar,
00:14:56.73\00:15:00.80
and they would
have a lot of parties
00:15:00.83\00:15:03.03
and we would hear
certain types of music,
00:15:03.06\00:15:04.90
now, a lot of
people know the friendly
00:15:04.93\00:15:06.80
Bob Marley-type Reggae songs
00:15:06.84\00:15:08.50
that were being
exported back then
00:15:08.54\00:15:10.41
but they didn't
know some of the local,
00:15:10.44\00:15:13.88
very sexually
explicit and graphic songs,
00:15:13.91\00:15:17.31
and I'll never forget when
I was about four years old,
00:15:17.35\00:15:21.15
I was at my grandmother's
house in the back yard
00:15:21.18\00:15:24.35
and there was a party
and I heard the lyrics
00:15:24.39\00:15:27.52
of a very
descriptive sexual song,
00:15:27.56\00:15:31.39
and that song...
00:15:31.43\00:15:33.33
you know they have a part
of the song called the "hook"
00:15:33.36\00:15:35.56
and the hook is
meant to go in and hook
00:15:35.60\00:15:38.10
and the words of that song
00:15:38.13\00:15:40.77
went in... and hooked
my little child-like mind
00:15:40.80\00:15:43.24
and the devil then
asked me a question,
00:15:43.30\00:15:46.07
"What would that
experience be like?"
00:15:46.14\00:15:48.88
Because the song was so
graphic and I pulled back at it
00:15:48.91\00:15:52.85
and just went about business,
00:15:52.88\00:15:54.22
going to church
and things like that.
00:15:54.25\00:15:55.65
And how old were
you at this point?
00:15:55.68\00:15:57.05
I was about four
years old at that point
00:15:57.09\00:15:59.15
and the devil...
as I look back now
00:15:59.19\00:16:04.56
was trying to get those...
00:16:04.59\00:16:06.19
he knew I wouldn't try
the Marijuana chemicals,
00:16:06.23\00:16:08.56
I wouldn't try the
White Rum chemicals,
00:16:08.63\00:16:11.00
so he knew that the
body naturally manufactures
00:16:11.03\00:16:14.64
these drugs... that
in the mind of a child
00:16:14.67\00:16:16.60
as Dr. John just explained,
it's... like we said...
00:16:16.64\00:16:19.97
like giving the
child keys to a locomotive
00:16:20.01\00:16:22.11
and telling them to drive
00:16:22.14\00:16:23.48
Hmmm...
00:16:23.51\00:16:24.85
and so... the devil
couldn't get an atmosphere
00:16:24.88\00:16:27.92
for me to be able to try this
00:16:27.95\00:16:29.38
because my grandparents were...
00:16:29.42\00:16:30.79
you know my
grandfather was a preacher,
00:16:30.82\00:16:32.42
my grandmother was a
treasurer in the church,
00:16:32.45\00:16:35.82
we're not going to parties,
00:16:35.89\00:16:37.36
we're not going
anywhere near parties,
00:16:37.39\00:16:39.33
there was no
"atmosphere" being created
00:16:39.36\00:16:41.26
for that seed that
was planted to grow.
00:16:41.30\00:16:44.00
So the devil does
what he learned from God,
00:16:44.07\00:16:46.74
he puts us in a
different atmosphere
00:16:46.77\00:16:48.67
just like Abraham was
moved from the land where he was
00:16:48.70\00:16:52.41
and God said, "I
have to bring you to
00:16:52.44\00:16:54.04
another land to fulfill
what I want to fulfill. "
00:16:54.08\00:16:56.71
My parents called my
grandparents and said,
00:16:56.75\00:16:59.15
"We want our children to come
to the United States of America"
00:16:59.18\00:17:01.32
and when we got here,
at that time, I was five...
00:17:01.35\00:17:04.12
and my parents
had left the church,
00:17:04.15\00:17:07.76
they were with the social
group who were making money
00:17:07.79\00:17:12.53
and, you know, the typical,
00:17:12.56\00:17:14.70
wanting to be
with the "in crowd"
00:17:14.73\00:17:16.10
and be cool and... now,
00:17:16.13\00:17:18.37
when they went to a party,
00:17:18.40\00:17:20.57
all the kids used to be
put in the little kids' room
00:17:20.60\00:17:23.34
while the parents were
outside dancing and drinking
00:17:23.37\00:17:25.87
so now I was in an
atmosphere that I could see
00:17:25.91\00:17:30.31
not the actual
"act" being performed
00:17:30.35\00:17:33.95
but the
suggestive motions of that
00:17:33.98\00:17:37.49
the seed didn't get
watered with the rain,
00:17:37.52\00:17:40.16
it got watered with the dew,
the "essence" of what it was
00:17:40.19\00:17:46.66
and so, having
looked out into that party
00:17:46.70\00:17:49.36
and seeing the
dancing and the carousing
00:17:49.40\00:17:51.77
and the sexual
dancing and the moves
00:17:51.80\00:17:54.77
you know, those
words got played back
00:17:54.80\00:17:57.61
and I began to...
00:17:57.64\00:17:59.54
even as a child...
make the connections.
00:17:59.57\00:18:01.31
The Bible says,
00:18:01.34\00:18:02.84
"Even a little child
is known by his ways"
00:18:02.88\00:18:05.55
and I went back
into the children's room
00:18:05.58\00:18:07.82
and my curious
little scientific mind
00:18:07.85\00:18:10.09
wanted to experiment to see,
00:18:10.12\00:18:12.02
"Hey, is this stuff true?"
00:18:12.05\00:18:13.92
And I ended up doing
something in that little room
00:18:13.96\00:18:19.26
with someone my
age that was just
00:18:19.29\00:18:21.76
mind-blowing to the two of
us and as Dr. John explained
00:18:21.80\00:18:28.90
when those doors were opened up
00:18:28.94\00:18:31.47
and those
hormones were triggered,
00:18:31.51\00:18:34.04
it was like
giving Crack to a baby.
00:18:34.08\00:18:37.85
Hmmm...
00:18:37.88\00:18:39.35
And years later, it
was... go get more...
00:18:39.38\00:18:46.89
get more... get
more... get more...
00:18:46.92\00:18:48.62
And seeing your parents
and seeing it within the home
00:18:48.66\00:18:55.60
not the act, but
the suggestive acts...
00:18:55.63\00:18:58.63
And it wasn't my
parents doing that,
00:18:58.67\00:19:01.60
It wasn't? Who was it?
00:19:01.67\00:19:03.14
Because my parents were
Seventh-day Adventist parents
00:19:03.17\00:19:04.74
you can tell a
Seventh-day Adventist at a party
00:19:04.77\00:19:07.31
because there's but
so far they will go,
00:19:07.34\00:19:09.54
they just want to
sometimes be there
00:19:09.58\00:19:10.91
to hang out with their friends,
00:19:10.95\00:19:12.28
so, I've never seen my parents
00:19:12.31\00:19:13.65
in those types of provocative
dance and things like that,
00:19:13.68\00:19:18.22
but you had
other "family friends"
00:19:18.25\00:19:22.06
who you'll call "Uncle or
Aunty" who... they were never
00:19:22.09\00:19:24.79
Seventh-day Adventists
they never went to church,
00:19:24.83\00:19:26.26
they drink a lot more alcohol,
and they don't have any limits
00:19:26.29\00:19:29.56
placed on them because
00:19:29.60\00:19:30.93
they didn't grow
up in that atmosphere.
00:19:30.97\00:19:33.07
And did you feel
like it was acceptable
00:19:33.10\00:19:35.24
because you saw that?
00:19:35.27\00:19:37.24
You know, for me, it was,
00:19:37.27\00:19:39.14
"Hey, is that
what grown-up people do
00:19:39.17\00:19:41.44
when they have
license to do that?"
00:19:41.48\00:19:43.68
And it just gave the
devil the opportunity to say,
00:19:43.71\00:19:47.12
"Hey," you know, just
like he said to Eve, from you,
00:19:47.15\00:19:49.02
"God is holding
out something from you,
00:19:49.05\00:19:51.45
let me show it to you"
that's what happened with me
00:19:51.49\00:19:55.29
and I said, "You know
what? I want to try that"
00:19:55.32\00:19:57.59
you know, and it's
no different than the..
00:19:57.63\00:20:00.20
the children who
end up trying alcohol
00:20:00.23\00:20:02.63
for the first time because
someone made it look cool.
00:20:02.66\00:20:05.73
Someone made it look attractive
00:20:05.80\00:20:07.44
and to shorten the
story a little bit,
00:20:07.47\00:20:10.61
by the time I was
eight, it had grown
00:20:10.67\00:20:13.78
and I wanted to
learn more, you know,
00:20:13.84\00:20:16.54
"How does this thing
give so much pleasure
00:20:16.58\00:20:18.51
to myself and someone else?"
00:20:18.55\00:20:19.88
And there had been other little
girls in school who... you know
00:20:19.91\00:20:23.18
their parents were
watching pornographic movies,
00:20:23.22\00:20:25.22
and they were sharing it
00:20:25.25\00:20:26.59
and this was all
in Elementary School.
00:20:26.62\00:20:28.49
You know, we don't
think about the... well...
00:20:28.52\00:20:34.33
sometimes we do,
it's covered under,
00:20:34.36\00:20:36.83
"Well, children
will be children,
00:20:36.87\00:20:39.30
they're going to explore,
00:20:39.33\00:20:40.67
they're going to see
what things are about
00:20:40.70\00:20:43.61
but it's okay,
don't worry about it
00:20:43.64\00:20:45.57
it's all normal,
it's all natural"
00:20:45.61\00:20:47.51
but what you're saying is,
from a spiritual perspective,
00:20:47.54\00:20:52.31
the seeds are being planted,
00:20:52.35\00:20:54.75
those seeds of sexual
activity are being planted
00:20:54.78\00:21:00.06
and the
pleasures that that brings,
00:21:00.09\00:21:03.83
before a child... I mean... a
child is experimenting with it
00:21:03.86\00:21:07.70
not realizing that this
is not meant for children.
00:21:07.73\00:21:10.87
And it doesn't help
that everywhere that you look
00:21:10.90\00:21:14.04
I mean, sex is being exploited,
00:21:14.07\00:21:15.74
so when you look
at these cartoons,
00:21:15.77\00:21:17.44
you see, even the cartoons
00:21:17.47\00:21:20.41
the women on there will have...
like... real curvy bodies...
00:21:20.44\00:21:23.68
Jessica Rabbit...
00:21:23.71\00:21:25.05
Yeah, that's what I was
thinking about when I...
00:21:25.08\00:21:27.82
with the curvy bodies and
they throw in little subtle
00:21:27.85\00:21:36.46
suggestions and
now, as time progresses,
00:21:36.49\00:21:40.43
it's getting worse
and worse and worse
00:21:40.50\00:21:44.37
it's like... the cartoons
are geared towards adults.
00:21:44.40\00:21:48.67
Absolutely, for me it got worse
00:21:48.70\00:21:51.01
and by the time I
was in third grade,
00:21:51.04\00:21:53.17
I remember there was a time
when we were sent to summer camp
00:21:53.21\00:21:56.11
and there was a Camp Counselor
00:21:56.14\00:21:57.85
that snuck off
with her boyfriend
00:21:57.88\00:21:59.21
and then I kind of
wanted to see where did they go
00:21:59.25\00:22:01.02
and what are they doing and
and I snuck around the corner
00:22:01.05\00:22:05.29
at the wrong time
and saw engagement
00:22:05.32\00:22:08.62
and they were not
dressed or anything like that
00:22:08.66\00:22:11.86
but they were just being
so passionate... and again,
00:22:11.89\00:22:15.46
just like we, in the
church, are called to show
00:22:15.50\00:22:20.24
how passionate we are about
Christ... so people can say,
00:22:20.27\00:22:22.70
"What makes you look so
happy when you talk about Jesus"
00:22:22.74\00:22:25.17
the devil does the same thing
00:22:25.21\00:22:26.94
because he was
trained by Jesus in heaven,
00:22:26.98\00:22:29.38
so having seen them look so
00:22:29.41\00:22:31.25
passionate about
what they were doing,
00:22:31.28\00:22:33.28
and I came up and
they split... of course
00:22:33.31\00:22:35.25
and you know, he runs this way
00:22:35.28\00:22:36.62
and she's trying to run that way
00:22:36.65\00:22:37.99
and she turns
to me and she says,
00:22:38.02\00:22:39.39
"Hey Lance... " now
adults and even young adults
00:22:39.42\00:22:43.73
they think,
"Children aren't perceptive,
00:22:43.76\00:22:46.73
they didn't know what it is
00:22:46.76\00:22:48.26
so let's just kind of distract
them, let's not say anything,"
00:22:48.30\00:22:50.47
so she says, "Hey
Lance, how are you doing?"
00:22:50.50\00:22:51.93
To distract me, come here, come
here again, give me a big kiss,
00:22:51.97\00:22:54.40
and I jumped up and I
grabbed her and embraced her
00:22:54.44\00:22:57.97
and gave her the same
kiss that I saw her giving him.
00:22:58.01\00:23:01.61
Wow!
00:23:01.64\00:23:02.98
She was 18 years old
and I was just eight...
00:23:03.01\00:23:05.78
Wow! How did she respond?
00:23:05.81\00:23:08.52
First of all, you
know, it was such a shock
00:23:08.55\00:23:12.89
that I was doing this,
00:23:12.92\00:23:15.39
at first she got caught
up in the moment, literally,
00:23:15.42\00:23:18.06
and after a while she realized,
00:23:18.09\00:23:19.66
"Hold on, I'm kissing
an eight-year-old boy"
00:23:19.69\00:23:21.93
Wow!
00:23:21.96\00:23:23.77
And then she pulled
me back and she said,
00:23:23.80\00:23:25.13
"Where did you
learn that?" you know,
00:23:25.17\00:23:27.34
and I didn't say
it out of my mouth
00:23:27.37\00:23:29.44
but in my mind, I
said that same thing
00:23:29.47\00:23:31.47
that many children
say, when parents and others
00:23:31.51\00:23:34.38
try to hide their wrongdoing
00:23:34.41\00:23:35.74
that they think
the child didn't see,
00:23:35.78\00:23:37.11
in the back of my mind I
said, "You just taught me"
00:23:37.15\00:23:39.51
and I jumped and walked away
00:23:39.55\00:23:42.08
but what I had
just learned is now,
00:23:42.15\00:23:44.95
being the experimental child
00:23:44.99\00:23:46.39
I go and try...
does it really work,
00:23:46.42\00:23:48.99
it worked with her but
will it work for someone else?
00:23:49.02\00:23:51.93
And I'm doing this and
I'm trying this and, you know,
00:23:51.99\00:23:54.66
woman after woman just
like Brother John said,
00:23:54.70\00:23:56.97
the newness goes away, you know,
00:23:57.00\00:23:59.70
and the music says what we think
00:23:59.73\00:24:02.37
like Jay Z says,
"On to the next one,
00:24:02.40\00:24:04.34
on to the next
one... on to the next one,"
00:24:04.37\00:24:06.64
you know, Rapper's Delight said,
00:24:06.68\00:24:08.38
"If your girl starts acting
up, then you... take her friend"
00:24:08.41\00:24:12.48
that's what the music was saying
00:24:12.51\00:24:14.95
and when I got that mixture
00:24:14.98\00:24:17.49
of the message of
what the music was saying,
00:24:17.52\00:24:21.19
the videos and the
shows that presented it
00:24:21.22\00:24:24.89
that glorified
it, it was addicting
00:24:24.93\00:24:28.03
and then... what's
church going to look like then,
00:24:28.06\00:24:30.03
you know, you
have people at church
00:24:30.07\00:24:31.80
saying, "Yes, we love the
Lord" but it looks so fake
00:24:31.83\00:24:34.87
and you have people at
parties and other places that
00:24:34.90\00:24:37.87
you can tell when they're
enjoying something to the full,
00:24:37.91\00:24:41.71
and by the time I got
into the Music Industry,
00:24:41.74\00:24:45.95
forget it, now I had the money,
00:24:45.98\00:24:49.18
I had the car, I had the house,
00:24:49.22\00:24:52.39
I still had the
Corporate job, so...
00:24:52.42\00:24:54.99
all the things that
could feed those pleasures
00:24:55.02\00:24:57.86
to attract the girls
and wine and dine them
00:24:57.89\00:25:00.13
and take them
there and go to the party
00:25:00.16\00:25:02.40
and then... we also
had singers and songs
00:25:02.46\00:25:05.70
and music also has
a way of triggering
00:25:05.73\00:25:09.30
and creating an
atmosphere, you know
00:25:09.34\00:25:12.81
if a Seventh-day Adventist
girl came over to a nice house
00:25:12.87\00:25:16.44
and she's along with
somebody and there is,
00:25:16.48\00:25:20.48
"Holy, holy, holy... "
and it's in the middle...
00:25:20.52\00:25:24.85
broad daylight,
what are the chances that
00:25:24.92\00:25:27.59
you know... but if
she comes in the evening
00:25:27.62\00:25:30.26
and the sun is going
down, and the lights are dimming
00:25:30.29\00:25:34.30
and back in those days
we put on Teddy Pendergrass
00:25:34.33\00:25:37.67
and he starts singing
"Turn off the lights... "
00:25:37.70\00:25:41.00
and all of a sudden
the whole atmosphere
00:25:41.04\00:25:45.54
just changed and it's conducive
for seeds that were planted
00:25:45.57\00:25:50.65
to be watered and
take their effect.
00:25:50.71\00:25:53.05
That is such an
interesting concept that...
00:25:53.08\00:25:56.52
that the atmosphere,
00:25:56.58\00:25:59.05
the music...
changes the atmosphere,
00:25:59.09\00:26:03.29
so holy music,
yes, worship music
00:26:03.32\00:26:07.50
changes the atmosphere,
sexual music... changes...
00:26:07.53\00:26:12.43
so for everything that God has,
00:26:12.47\00:26:14.30
we know that the
enemy has a counterfeit.
00:26:14.34\00:26:15.67
Absolutely...
00:26:15.70\00:26:17.04
Well, look at what
Lucifer did in heaven
00:26:17.07\00:26:19.71
he was... over
music... Hmmm... hmmm...
00:26:19.74\00:26:22.44
and so, he knows all about music
00:26:22.48\00:26:24.85
he's had plenty
of time to practice,
00:26:24.88\00:26:27.65
and he's exploited
that. Hmmm... hmmm...
00:26:27.68\00:26:30.45
Absolutely...
00:26:30.49\00:26:31.82
so, I want to touch on something
else that Dr. John said,
00:26:31.85\00:26:34.19
when you begin to
experience these different
00:26:34.22\00:26:39.89
internally-produced drugs
00:26:39.96\00:26:42.43
that addict you to this thing,
00:26:42.46\00:26:46.13
you begin to act like others
who are addicted to drugs,
00:26:46.17\00:26:48.97
others who are addicted
to Cocaine or whatever else.
00:26:49.00\00:26:53.07
These internally-produced
hormones, right?
00:26:53.11\00:26:55.31
Lance: Correct...
Yvonne: That act like a drug.
00:26:55.34\00:26:58.18
Absolutely, absolutely,
00:26:58.21\00:26:59.71
things like
dopamine and serotonin
00:26:59.75\00:27:02.12
and norepinephrine, and
the whole cocktail mixes...
00:27:02.15\00:27:05.25
like mixing drinks,
00:27:05.29\00:27:06.62
and when the novelty
wears off and you get more,
00:27:06.65\00:27:11.03
and the novelty
wears off and you get more,
00:27:11.06\00:27:12.59
it's like a Cocaine high
that you can never fulfill again
00:27:12.66\00:27:15.83
and it never gets fulfilled,
00:27:15.86\00:27:17.20
and at that point, you
know, women... for guys
00:27:17.23\00:27:23.24
as well as men... for...
00:27:23.27\00:27:24.87
because there are women
who do that as well too...
00:27:24.91\00:27:26.78
you know...
become throw-away items
00:27:26.81\00:27:29.21
and I ended up with
three different baby mothers
00:27:29.24\00:27:35.95
and walking away
from children, that...
00:27:35.98\00:27:38.95
"Oh, yeah, their born but...
I got to go make music and... "
00:27:38.99\00:27:42.06
and the destruction that
it caused was no different
00:27:42.09\00:27:45.96
than that Crack mother who
leaves her baby in the house
00:27:45.99\00:27:50.23
to go out on the street...
to go and get more Crack
00:27:50.27\00:27:54.47
and get more
Cocaine and get more alcohol
00:27:54.50\00:27:56.67
and she's like an ostrich
with her head buried in the sand
00:27:56.71\00:28:00.48
doesn't care about her
children and that's why...
00:28:00.51\00:28:03.61
I don't know if he wants to
touch on the effects of dopamine
00:28:03.65\00:28:06.31
but that just
created that situation for me
00:28:06.35\00:28:12.09
and we didn't even touch on
the spiritual side of it yet...
00:28:12.12\00:28:15.52
Let's come back,
00:28:15.56\00:28:17.06
let's come back
to that in one second
00:28:17.09\00:28:19.63
Doc, can you come
back in for a second?
00:28:19.66\00:28:21.70
Sure...
00:28:21.73\00:28:23.16
Because one of the
things that we're looking at is
00:28:23.20\00:28:28.57
what happens when you
embark upon that whole journey,
00:28:28.60\00:28:34.21
those receptors that
are triggered that...
00:28:34.24\00:28:36.95
as you mentioned before
00:28:36.98\00:28:38.51
and this chemical
cocktail that takes place
00:28:38.55\00:28:42.45
as you mentioned
before, what would you say,
00:28:42.48\00:28:46.29
the effect of the
music is hormonally,
00:28:46.35\00:28:50.83
as you're listening to music
00:28:50.89\00:28:52.43
what's happening
chemically to the body?
00:28:52.49\00:28:55.00
Music acts like an
accelerant, it speeds things up
00:28:55.03\00:29:01.60
and it also, as we've been told,
it's a direct conduit, like,
00:29:01.64\00:29:08.41
if I wanted to
explain something to you
00:29:08.44\00:29:10.11
I would have to say it to you
00:29:10.15\00:29:12.01
and then it would have to
go into the auditory channels
00:29:12.05\00:29:14.25
in your brain and get processed,
00:29:14.32\00:29:16.12
music doesn't
have to get processed,
00:29:16.15\00:29:18.52
it goes
directly into your psyche
00:29:18.55\00:29:20.89
and prepares you like
the Brother just said,
00:29:20.92\00:29:24.06
to do some things
that you wouldn't have done
00:29:24.09\00:29:27.20
and now, what
we're finding is that
00:29:27.23\00:29:29.03
the hormones
that we talked about,
00:29:29.06\00:29:30.70
they're also...
they're blinding hormones
00:29:30.73\00:29:34.27
so it actually blinds
you to some things that
00:29:34.30\00:29:37.44
if you were not being blinded,
you would have... awakened
00:29:37.51\00:29:41.84
and thought to yourself,
"What am I doing here?"
00:29:41.88\00:29:43.61
you know like the
Prodigal son you'd want to run,
00:29:43.65\00:29:45.35
but
unfortunately, unfortunately,
00:29:45.38\00:29:48.52
the pre-frontal
cortex of your brain,
00:29:48.55\00:29:51.62
the part right in front...
right behind the forehead,
00:29:51.65\00:29:55.16
they've actually done
some fMRI studies and found
00:29:55.19\00:29:58.66
that the blood
flow during these times
00:29:58.69\00:30:00.76
with the music, with the intent,
00:30:00.80\00:30:03.57
because a lot of it
has to do with the intent,
00:30:03.60\00:30:05.63
what are you intending to do?
00:30:05.67\00:30:07.30
What are you thinking to do?
00:30:07.34\00:30:08.77
so when you get on that
road, the pre-frontal cortex
00:30:08.80\00:30:12.57
begins to get less
oxygen and what that results in
00:30:12.61\00:30:16.38
is a complete drop in judgment
00:30:16.41\00:30:19.75
and a complete
drop in decision making
00:30:19.81\00:30:22.85
so you find at
Clubs, if you ask people
00:30:22.88\00:30:25.89
so many of the
mistakes that they made
00:30:25.92\00:30:28.42
were made at clubs
where there was music
00:30:28.46\00:30:30.89
where there was alcohol,
00:30:30.93\00:30:32.26
where there were
half-naked bodies
00:30:32.29\00:30:34.30
all of this mix
dropped their inhibitions
00:30:34.33\00:30:37.30
and also affected... judgment,
00:30:37.33\00:30:39.70
you know, so they
would do things that...
00:30:39.73\00:30:41.07
when they woke up the
next morning, they would think,
00:30:41.10\00:30:42.74
"How did I do that?
I would never do that,"
00:30:42.80\00:30:44.67
so...
00:30:44.71\00:30:47.54
as I was
listening to the brother,
00:30:47.58\00:30:48.98
I thought to myself,
and you know, as a child,
00:30:49.01\00:30:51.88
there are other things
called "Neuroplasticity"
00:30:51.91\00:30:54.75
I don't know if
you've heard of that...
00:30:54.78\00:30:56.12
Neuroplasticity simply says that
00:30:56.15\00:30:58.15
your environment is
able to shape your brain
00:30:58.19\00:31:00.62
now, we're not just
talking about the receptors,
00:31:00.66\00:31:02.99
we're talking about a brain with
Neurons that have been created
00:31:03.02\00:31:06.73
just for this experience
that you're exposing yourself to
00:31:06.76\00:31:09.30
so that, by the
time you're a teenager,
00:31:09.33\00:31:12.23
it really, really
would take a miracle
00:31:12.27\00:31:15.17
to change things around
00:31:15.20\00:31:16.54
because we cannot
destroy those neurons
00:31:16.57\00:31:18.57
all we can do is,
we can rewrite them,
00:31:18.61\00:31:20.54
we can create
neurons around them
00:31:20.58\00:31:22.61
and create a path
00:31:22.64\00:31:23.98
on top of the
path that was negative
00:31:24.01\00:31:26.11
you can't really wipe
them off or wipe them away,
00:31:26.15\00:31:28.88
so, we have to
rewrite it which means
00:31:28.92\00:31:31.05
conversion... you know
when conversion comes along,
00:31:31.09\00:31:33.72
it rewrites all the
things that you had before.
00:31:33.76\00:31:36.19
There's just one other
thing that I wanted to add
00:31:36.22\00:31:38.66
that concerns me a lot,
00:31:38.69\00:31:40.03
because I work in schools with
middle-aged school children,
00:31:40.06\00:31:43.33
and I don't know if
you guys have noticed
00:31:43.37\00:31:45.37
how much time they
spend on their devices.
00:31:45.40\00:31:47.40
Every time you look at a child,
00:31:47.44\00:31:49.44
they're on their
little cell phones.
00:31:49.47\00:31:51.41
If you come close
to them as an adult,
00:31:51.47\00:31:53.38
for some strange reason,
00:31:53.41\00:31:54.74
they click out of
whatever they were looking at,
00:31:54.78\00:31:56.68
pull the phone away, you
can't see what they're doing
00:31:56.71\00:31:59.88
I am convinced that the
easy access to pornography...
00:31:59.91\00:32:03.02
you can Google anything you want
00:32:03.05\00:32:05.55
and boom! you have
ten sites with naked women
00:32:05.59\00:32:09.16
and this is what our
children have access to.
00:32:09.19\00:32:12.73
and I've talked to
some of the parents
00:32:12.79\00:32:14.13
but then... the argument is
00:32:14.16\00:32:15.50
"But he needs the internet so
he can do research for school"
00:32:15.53\00:32:18.37
so the kid keeps the internet
00:32:18.40\00:32:20.34
but the parent goes to their
bed at 9:00 o'clock, you know,
00:32:20.37\00:32:23.14
trying to keep the
Eight Laws of Health,
00:32:23.17\00:32:25.17
and there's the kid in his room
00:32:25.21\00:32:27.48
it's 10
o'clock, it's 11 o'clock,
00:32:27.51\00:32:29.18
it's 12 o'clock, it's 1 o'clock
00:32:29.24\00:32:30.85
and he's just going
from site to site to site
00:32:30.88\00:32:33.65
actually changing the
structure of his brain
00:32:33.68\00:32:36.69
and preparing him to
reduce his inhibitions
00:32:36.72\00:32:39.35
and do the devil's bidding.
00:32:39.39\00:32:40.89
Wow!
00:32:40.92\00:32:42.29
So that's an area, I think,
we can't leave alone at all.
00:32:42.32\00:32:44.63
That's powerful.
00:32:44.66\00:32:45.99
And you know, it's the
internet for these children
00:32:46.03\00:32:48.16
but for us, it was
the television programs
00:32:48.20\00:32:50.13
we weren't allowed to watch
00:32:50.17\00:32:51.50
until our parents
went to work late,
00:32:51.53\00:32:52.93
or the video we weren't
allowed to watch that we snuck
00:32:52.97\00:32:55.67
or we were able to
watch at a friend's house
00:32:55.70\00:32:57.77
whose parents forgot
that it was there and...
00:32:57.81\00:33:00.14
and those things have its effect
00:33:00.18\00:33:02.74
at the same time, the
whole "atmosphere" issue
00:33:02.78\00:33:08.82
you know... as...
I used to be a DJ...
00:33:08.85\00:33:10.65
and.. you know...
when I was in the Club
00:33:10.69\00:33:14.82
I would literally see
00:33:14.86\00:33:16.52
someone's wife walk in,
00:33:16.56\00:33:18.16
you can tell, she's
married, she has a ring on
00:33:18.19\00:33:19.63
she came with her girlfriends
00:33:19.66\00:33:21.00
and you could tell
she's going under some stress,
00:33:21.03\00:33:24.20
and the girlfriends
are trying to take her out
00:33:24.23\00:33:26.03
so that she can
relieve the stress,
00:33:26.07\00:33:28.57
and guys are asking her to dance
00:33:28.60\00:33:31.01
and she says, "No, I'm
married" and things like that,
00:33:31.04\00:33:33.54
and I could,
literally, as a DJ...
00:33:33.58\00:33:35.51
begin to play
certain types of music
00:33:35.54\00:33:37.81
to first get her
to drop her guard
00:33:37.85\00:33:40.02
relax, stop being the
one to watch the pocketbooks
00:33:40.05\00:33:43.79
and get out and have some fun
00:33:43.82\00:33:45.15
and then now... the
devil is doing his work...
00:33:45.19\00:33:48.12
he's planting suggestions,
and the way the devil does it is
00:33:48.19\00:33:52.33
he doesn't
necessarily use a lie...
00:33:52.36\00:33:54.80
he uses the truth.
00:33:54.86\00:33:56.60
Hmmm... how so?
00:33:56.63\00:33:58.07
"Listen, I know you're
depressed... you look so sad,"
00:33:58.10\00:34:01.00
you hear it all the
time, "You look so sad,
00:34:01.04\00:34:03.20
did you come here to stay sad
00:34:03.24\00:34:06.44
or did you come
here to have fun?"
00:34:06.47\00:34:07.81
The devil, many times
doesn't make statements,
00:34:07.84\00:34:10.48
he asks questions,
00:34:10.51\00:34:12.21
that's why when
Jesus was dealing with
00:34:12.25\00:34:15.25
Scribes and Pharisees,
who were very argumentative
00:34:15.28\00:34:18.09
He didn't make
statements, He asked questions.
00:34:18.15\00:34:20.86
He would say, "What
does the Scripture say?"
00:34:20.89\00:34:23.53
Because if a
person is defensive,
00:34:23.59\00:34:26.56
and you don't want
to give them information
00:34:26.59\00:34:29.16
for them to be defensive
00:34:29.20\00:34:30.53
you ask them a question
00:34:30.57\00:34:31.90
for them to break
down their own defenses.
00:34:31.93\00:34:33.84
So the Devil got his
methods of course from Jesus.
00:34:33.87\00:34:36.84
Absolutely, he
was trained in heaven.
00:34:36.87\00:34:39.31
And so, asking
the right questions
00:34:39.34\00:34:41.71
and then... while those
questions are being asked,
00:34:41.74\00:34:43.91
the "appeal song" is
being played at the Club,
00:34:43.95\00:34:48.48
and the music is
suggesting to her,
00:34:48.52\00:34:50.82
"A few stolen moments...
are all that we share...
00:34:50.85\00:34:54.72
you've got your
family... stay with me... "
00:34:54.76\00:34:57.93
you know...
"stay with me tonight"
00:34:57.96\00:34:59.59
or if, you know,
"Let me hold you tight,"
00:34:59.63\00:35:01.76
by Luther Vandross...
00:35:01.80\00:35:03.13
"for only just one
night, it will be all right
00:35:03.16\00:35:05.23
if only just... "
00:35:05.27\00:35:07.07
and the music
now is swelling that
00:35:07.10\00:35:09.20
and before you know it,
00:35:09.24\00:35:10.91
she has left her
pocketbooks and she starts...
00:35:10.94\00:35:13.24
"Oh, I'll just
dance with my girlfriends"
00:35:13.27\00:35:15.38
but what she doesn't
understand spiritually
00:35:15.41\00:35:17.38
is that when you
dance to something
00:35:17.45\00:35:20.68
it's an act of celebration
and whatever is being said
00:35:20.72\00:35:25.25
is being celebrated,
00:35:25.29\00:35:28.19
Hmmm... say that again,
00:35:28.22\00:35:31.16
that's some deep stuff.
00:35:31.19\00:35:32.69
When you dance to something
it's an act of celebration
00:35:32.73\00:35:36.73
and whatever is being said
is what's being celebrated.
00:35:36.77\00:35:40.74
For instance, if you
had a party for your mother,
00:35:40.77\00:35:43.94
and they're
playing a song that says,
00:35:43.97\00:35:46.47
"Your mother is the
best woman in the world
00:35:46.51\00:35:47.91
get dancing... "
00:35:47.94\00:35:49.28
but if you have
a song that says,
00:35:49.31\00:35:50.75
"Oh, your mother is so dumb,
don't you all hate her... "
00:35:50.78\00:35:53.01
you're saying, "I
don't agree with that"
00:35:53.05\00:35:54.92
so what do you
do? You stop dancing.
00:35:54.95\00:35:56.75
I would yank that
thing off the CD player.
00:35:56.79\00:35:58.72
Mom: Thank you...
Son: You're welcome.
00:35:58.75\00:36:00.59
But if someone sees you
still dancing to that...
00:36:00.66\00:36:03.59
they're sitting back and saying,
00:36:03.63\00:36:04.96
"Something happened that
made him to not like his mother"
00:36:04.99\00:36:08.43
so, let's go back to the Club,
00:36:08.46\00:36:11.20
now a guy who is wondering
00:36:11.23\00:36:13.90
if she's willing
to go home with him
00:36:13.94\00:36:15.40
is seeing her dance to a
song and begin to enjoy...
00:36:15.44\00:36:18.57
she's getting caught up in the
00:36:18.61\00:36:21.51
"What if" questions
that the devil asks,
00:36:21.54\00:36:23.51
"What if you did what
your husband did to you?
00:36:23.55\00:36:26.78
He cheated on you,
don't you deserve this,
00:36:26.82\00:36:29.85
don't you deserve better?"
00:36:29.88\00:36:31.29
The "What if?" questions.
00:36:31.32\00:36:32.65
"What if you went home with
him, what if you enjoyed...?"
00:36:32.69\00:36:35.22
The "What if?"
questions, the same questions
00:36:35.26\00:36:36.93
that people get privately
at home in their bedroom.
00:36:36.96\00:36:39.29
What if that person
that you're "weak to"
00:36:39.33\00:36:41.46
suddenly came and called you?
00:36:41.50\00:36:42.83
And, of course, the devil
is going to call his demon
00:36:42.86\00:36:44.87
and say, "All right,
let him call right now!"
00:36:44.93\00:36:46.43
And then they
call you, and they go,
00:36:46.47\00:36:47.80
"I was just thinking about you"
it's all the setup of the devil.
00:36:47.84\00:36:51.81
Now... you used to DJ,
00:36:51.84\00:36:54.34
I used to do Club
Promotions, back in the day,
00:36:54.38\00:36:59.71
have you seen the
Club without the lights on
00:36:59.75\00:37:05.02
and without the atmosphere,
00:37:05.05\00:37:07.89
have you seen it
during the day when...
00:37:07.92\00:37:10.33
Yes, and it looks horrible.
00:37:10.36\00:37:12.79
Terrible, black
and dirty and it's...
00:37:12.83\00:37:16.56
cheap looking and everything...
00:37:16.60\00:37:18.67
but at night...
with those lights,
00:37:18.70\00:37:21.07
and the alcohol
and all that stuff,
00:37:21.10\00:37:23.44
it's a whole 'nother world.
00:37:23.47\00:37:26.37
You know, it's...
there's something else that
00:37:26.41\00:37:28.78
Dr. John talked
about... about the blinding...
00:37:28.84\00:37:31.18
have you ever
gone home from the club
00:37:31.21\00:37:34.12
and the next day
you pick up that suit
00:37:34.15\00:37:36.18
or whatever you're
wearing and smell it,
00:37:36.22\00:37:38.95
and you go,
"Eeewwww... what is that?"
00:37:38.99\00:37:41.72
Well, guess what?
00:37:41.76\00:37:43.09
That's the smell of
that atmosphere you were in
00:37:43.12\00:37:46.83
but you were blinded to it
00:37:46.86\00:37:49.50
because of what you were
focused on... like he said,
00:37:49.53\00:37:52.63
what you were focused...
what your pre-frontal cortex
00:37:52.70\00:37:55.47
or whatever he said,
00:37:55.50\00:37:56.87
was focused on
going there to get
00:37:56.91\00:37:58.84
so you didn't think of
all that cigarette smoke
00:37:58.87\00:38:01.38
you were inhaling and
all that Marijuana smoke,
00:38:01.41\00:38:03.85
and you didn't know that
00:38:03.88\00:38:05.21
you were in that
atmosphere of death
00:38:05.25\00:38:07.15
that was literally killing
you with the second-hand smoke,
00:38:07.22\00:38:10.25
killing you with the
alcohol, all at once,
00:38:10.29\00:38:12.95
all because you
wanted to get that pleasure.
00:38:12.99\00:38:15.59
Doc, let's bring you back
in to talk a little bit about
00:38:15.62\00:38:19.76
that blinding hormone because
that's a powerful thing too.
00:38:19.79\00:38:24.57
You don't even see the faults
of the person that you're with
00:38:24.60\00:38:29.07
because of that
blinding hormone, correct?
00:38:29.10\00:38:32.64
Right, that's correct,
and we have to remember that
00:38:32.67\00:38:35.58
all of these hormones
were intended for good use,
00:38:35.61\00:38:38.45
a good purpose, and so,
00:38:38.51\00:38:40.78
blinding serves a
really good purpose
00:38:40.82\00:38:43.02
if your intentions
are... you know, pure,
00:38:43.05\00:38:45.42
you meet someone,
you wouldn't want to see
00:38:45.45\00:38:47.76
all of their faults,
right upfront on the first day
00:38:47.82\00:38:49.89
you would have run
away, anyone of us... would...
00:38:49.92\00:38:51.99
so... God knowing
that... set it up so that
00:38:52.03\00:38:57.07
you are blinded long enough
00:38:57.10\00:38:58.97
so that you could
see their positives
00:38:59.00\00:39:00.90
and fall in love with that.
00:39:00.94\00:39:02.30
So the "blinding" had a
purpose, but the problem is
00:39:02.34\00:39:05.17
outside of the
context of marriage
00:39:05.21\00:39:07.08
and especially in the
world that we live in today,
00:39:07.11\00:39:09.28
there are some things
that you would want to see
00:39:09.31\00:39:11.48
but you don't...
because... Serotonin...
00:39:11.51\00:39:13.28
one of the
biggest blinding agents
00:39:13.31\00:39:15.62
prevents you from fully
grasping... so, the person says,
00:39:15.65\00:39:18.75
"Oh, you know I
snore... " and you are like...
00:39:18.79\00:39:20.96
"Oh, don't worry
about that, who doesn't?"
00:39:20.99\00:39:24.23
Serotonin...
Serotonin does that to you.
00:39:24.26\00:39:27.50
And then the person says,
00:39:27.53\00:39:28.86
"You know, it's one
o'clock in the morning,
00:39:28.90\00:39:30.43
we've been talking
for the last seven hours
00:39:30.47\00:39:31.90
don't you have to go
to work in the morning?"
00:39:31.93\00:39:33.30
"Yes, but don't worry about that
I stay up late all the time... "
00:39:33.34\00:39:37.27
But you don't...
you go to bed at 9:00...
00:39:37.31\00:39:39.47
Serotonin does that to you,
it makes you like a superman
00:39:39.51\00:39:43.04
and that's how it
works, so it blinds you
00:39:43.08\00:39:45.95
and the blinding is
good in that respect.
00:39:45.98\00:39:49.28
But unfortunately,
it will also blind you
00:39:49.32\00:39:51.19
along with Oxytocin,
00:39:51.22\00:39:52.55
they say Oxytocin
raises your level of trust,
00:39:52.59\00:39:54.76
it's one of the
side effects of Oxytocin,
00:39:54.82\00:39:57.16
people who are high on
Oxytocin, they trust easily,
00:39:57.23\00:39:59.63
if it's extremely
high... then you're gullible
00:39:59.66\00:40:01.36
but the point is,
00:40:01.40\00:40:02.73
you're getting
into a relationship
00:40:02.76\00:40:04.53
where you are
getting Oxytocin to flow,
00:40:04.57\00:40:06.43
because you're
either holding hands
00:40:06.47\00:40:07.84
or you're
touching or you're talking,
00:40:07.87\00:40:09.44
or you're taking
it a little further
00:40:09.47\00:40:10.97
and you actually... open
yourself up to this individual
00:40:11.04\00:40:14.91
who might not have
your best interest at heart
00:40:14.94\00:40:17.08
and that's one of the problems
so you're completely blinded,
00:40:17.11\00:40:19.95
completely taken,
and before you know it
00:40:19.98\00:40:21.58
he's on his way with your heart.
00:40:21.65\00:40:23.39
Hmmm... that's good stuff.
00:40:23.45\00:40:25.42
You know it's one thing
when it happens in the Club
00:40:25.45\00:40:27.66
where an Adventist
knows that they shouldn't be,
00:40:27.69\00:40:29.82
it's another thing when it
happens in a church setting,
00:40:29.86\00:40:33.76
where they should be.
00:40:33.80\00:40:35.56
Hmmm... unpack that for us.
00:40:35.60\00:40:37.10
The Bible says that
when Satan went to the church
00:40:37.13\00:40:42.20
of the Garden of Eden,
00:40:42.27\00:40:43.61
the first Seventh-day Adventist
Church of the Garden of Eden,
00:40:43.64\00:40:45.87
he knew that he couldn't
be obvious... like the Club...
00:40:45.91\00:40:50.21
at the Club... you
know why you're there,
00:40:50.25\00:40:52.05
you know what somebody wants,
00:40:52.11\00:40:53.78
you know when they come
to you, they're going to say,
00:40:53.82\00:40:55.62
"Hey, can I go home
and sleep with you?"
00:40:55.65\00:40:57.22
At the Club, it's
obvious... but in the church
00:40:57.25\00:41:00.92
when someone wants
to be engaged in that,
00:41:00.96\00:41:03.59
they have to do what
Satan did in the Garden of Eden.
00:41:03.63\00:41:06.13
The Bible says, "but the
serpent was the most subtle,"
00:41:06.16\00:41:10.10
the most subtle, so
the difference I've seen is
00:41:10.13\00:41:14.80
you begin to act
to drop subtle hints
00:41:14.84\00:41:17.17
and why do you
drop subtle hints,
00:41:17.21\00:41:19.51
because you don't
want to be discovered,
00:41:19.54\00:41:22.84
you want to be
fishers of men or women...
00:41:22.91\00:41:25.71
right there in the
church so what do you do?
00:41:25.75\00:41:28.25
You throw a little bait
and see if someone nibbles
00:41:28.28\00:41:30.85
and I've seen both
men and women do it,
00:41:30.89\00:41:34.36
and we've... many
people have been guilty of that
00:41:34.39\00:41:36.59
and so you'll get a situation
where a brother will say,
00:41:36.62\00:41:41.70
"Hey, Sis, you're you
doing, come give me a hug"
00:41:41.73\00:41:44.00
and now... the
sisters in our church,
00:41:44.03\00:41:46.27
we'll talk about ladies,
if a brother comes to hug you,
00:41:46.30\00:41:48.30
let them hug
you... you know... here...
00:41:48.34\00:41:50.61
you're at church... you know...
00:41:50.64\00:41:53.17
where you greet-them-with-a-
holy-kiss-type of thing,
00:41:53.24\00:41:55.84
but... then they tell him,
00:41:55.88\00:41:57.88
"Don't let him hug you
around the waist... like this"
00:41:57.91\00:42:00.78
because, sex is
more about stimulation,
00:42:00.82\00:42:06.29
sex, like drugs, is
a stimulant and so...
00:42:06.32\00:42:11.73
there are different things
that stimulates an individual
00:42:11.76\00:42:14.76
and one of the things that I was
listening to that I don't know
00:42:14.80\00:42:19.63
that Dr. John
didn't touch on yet was...
00:42:19.67\00:42:21.87
one of the areas in
the brain that lights up
00:42:21.90\00:42:24.11
during sexual intercourse...
are the areas that affect
00:42:24.14\00:42:27.68
emotions and long-term memory,
00:42:27.71\00:42:30.25
so a person can always go back
and process... years later...
00:42:30.28\00:42:34.85
someone could be a grandma
00:42:34.88\00:42:36.52
and run into that
old lover that she knew
00:42:36.58\00:42:38.25
from Junior High School...
00:42:38.29\00:42:39.62
that old feeling just
comes back and goes, "boom"
00:42:39.65\00:42:42.56
and then when Michael
Jackson starts playing,
00:42:42.59\00:42:45.19
"Do you remember... "
00:42:45.26\00:42:46.59
and those feelings and all
the emotions with them come back
00:42:46.63\00:42:51.67
so in a church setting,
00:42:51.73\00:42:53.77
you know, the devil will give
you things in small amounts,
00:42:53.80\00:42:57.67
now, I can get you
to eat a cannonball,
00:42:57.71\00:43:00.84
you'll say, "I'll
never eat a cannonball. "
00:43:00.88\00:43:03.45
Really? how can I get
you to eat a cannonball?
00:43:03.48\00:43:06.88
Well, do you like carrot cake?
00:43:06.92\00:43:09.18
Oooooh!
00:43:09.22\00:43:11.62
Smell this carrot cake...
00:43:11.65\00:43:13.15
how does that smell?
00:43:13.19\00:43:14.82
Oh, my word...
00:43:14.86\00:43:16.49
Smells like... "I have
to eat this carrot cake"
00:43:16.52\00:43:19.76
so now I just found
out you love carrot cake
00:43:19.79\00:43:23.26
but you hate
cannonballs so what I do is,
00:43:23.30\00:43:26.70
I grind up the cannon ball
and I put it in little bits...
00:43:26.74\00:43:30.24
little untraceable bits...
00:43:30.27\00:43:32.47
little tiny bits of
microscopic-almost...
00:43:32.51\00:43:35.24
iron-ball powders...
00:43:35.28\00:43:36.98
and I lace it all
throughout that carrot cake...
00:43:37.01\00:43:38.55
do you think that
they'll be able to discern it?
00:43:38.58\00:43:40.05
Probably not...
00:43:40.08\00:43:41.92
I give you all the
carrot cake you want
00:43:41.95\00:43:43.82
and once all
those things assemble...
00:43:43.85\00:43:45.52
then you've just
eating a cannonball.
00:43:45.55\00:43:47.19
I just put my magnet to you
00:43:47.22\00:43:49.26
and I'm drawing you
anywhere I want to take you.
00:43:49.29\00:43:50.89
Hmmm...
00:43:50.93\00:43:53.43
And in the church, those
little subtleties happen.
00:43:53.46\00:43:57.23
"Hey, how're you
doing?" "How are you doing?"
00:43:57.27\00:44:00.04
"Hey, happy
Sabbath," "Happy Sabbath,"
00:44:00.07\00:44:02.40
you know, the
looks... and the attractions
00:44:02.44\00:44:07.68
and sometimes... we...
00:44:07.74\00:44:10.35
whether male or female
00:44:10.38\00:44:12.91
provide the stimulus
for sexual temptation.
00:44:12.95\00:44:15.42
What I mean... the
guy on the Praise Team,
00:44:15.45\00:44:18.72
who is a young
guy, he's working out,
00:44:18.75\00:44:20.42
so he wants to
wear the muscled...
00:44:20.46\00:44:22.06
you know, he wants to
wear the muscled shirt...
00:44:22.09\00:44:24.13
I see Sister Lewis smiling...
00:44:24.16\00:44:25.83
I know, because... I
know... you know what?
00:44:25.86\00:44:28.76
I can do that
smell, it's like ooooh...!
00:44:28.80\00:44:31.60
And now he's this young
buff in this muscled shirt
00:44:31.63\00:44:35.77
singing on the Praise Team
00:44:35.80\00:44:37.14
and he's wearing
these close-fitting pants,
00:44:37.17\00:44:39.71
and he's beginning to
move, but he's singing a song
00:44:39.74\00:44:44.75
praising the Lord,
00:44:44.78\00:44:46.21
but how focused can the
sisters in the front row be
00:44:46.25\00:44:48.88
when... they're saying...
00:44:48.95\00:44:50.85
"Lord, I've been
waiting for a husband
00:44:50.89\00:44:52.29
and look at this man...
" and all of those things,
00:44:52.32\00:44:55.86
and the devil now...
could stimulate their eyes,
00:44:55.89\00:44:59.39
and it's worse now...
00:44:59.43\00:45:01.03
if, after church he
has on a nice cologne,
00:45:01.06\00:45:03.00
and they hug
him, they go, "ooooh!"
00:45:03.03\00:45:06.03
simulate the nasal capacities
00:45:06.07\00:45:08.00
and not guarding
the avenues of the soul.
00:45:08.04\00:45:10.14
Later on... when she's home...
00:45:10.17\00:45:12.67
and all her friends are gone
00:45:12.71\00:45:14.74
and she has nothing to do,
00:45:14.78\00:45:16.75
the devil starts
playing the... "What if... "
00:45:16.81\00:45:18.91
Hmmm...
00:45:18.95\00:45:20.62
And all those
stimulants can now be processed
00:45:20.65\00:45:24.29
recalled back to memory...
00:45:24.32\00:45:26.69
same thing with
this young gentlemen
00:45:26.72\00:45:29.12
who hugged the young
lady around her waist,
00:45:29.16\00:45:31.36
and said, "Hmmm... she
got a nice little shape
00:45:31.39\00:45:33.60
I didn't know she...
yeah, she had on a church dress,
00:45:33.63\00:45:36.20
I couldn't tell she had this
kind of shape in a church dress"
00:45:36.23\00:45:38.63
And now when he releases,
the sensory areas of the brain
00:45:38.70\00:45:43.10
has recorded that
for processing later...
00:45:43.17\00:45:45.61
and will play back
that video tape later,
00:45:45.64\00:45:48.04
and the devil will have
some edits to add in there
00:45:48.08\00:45:50.81
and some sound effects
and things of that nature,
00:45:50.85\00:45:53.85
you know, and so, people
in the church begin to...
00:45:53.92\00:45:56.89
to get these subtleties built up
00:45:56.92\00:45:59.55
and if they never get rid of it,
it adds up to that cannonball
00:45:59.59\00:46:05.79
and after a while,
they don't realize it,
00:46:05.86\00:46:09.36
"Why is this thing pulling
me, where did it come from?
00:46:09.40\00:46:12.80
How can I deal with
it, it's so strong,"
00:46:12.83\00:46:15.20
you know...
"it's... what's happening?"
00:46:15.24\00:46:17.61
Hmmm... hmmm...
00:46:17.64\00:46:18.97
And the devil
couldn't say, "well... "
00:46:19.01\00:46:20.74
they'll say... after
a while they get bored
00:46:20.78\00:46:22.11
with this packaging,
00:46:22.14\00:46:23.48
and the devil
will say, "No problem,
00:46:23.51\00:46:25.11
I'll provide the same
thing in better packaging. "
00:46:25.18\00:46:30.19
And what do you see
when you see a package
00:46:30.22\00:46:32.02
that's closed,
what do you want to do?
00:46:32.05\00:46:33.82
Open it.
00:46:33.86\00:46:35.19
You want to open it and
see if it looks any better
00:46:35.22\00:46:38.06
so, the devil says,
"Yeah... go ahead... open it up,
00:46:38.09\00:46:41.16
ah... it's
good... it's okay... "
00:46:41.20\00:46:43.16
I don't know if I should pop
this thing or pull the string.
00:46:43.23\00:46:45.47
Go ahead... pop it...
00:46:45.53\00:46:46.87
Ah... see... you see
that... "go ahead... pop it"
00:46:46.90\00:46:50.84
I got all caught up.
00:46:50.87\00:46:53.04
And now, he shows you...
00:46:53.07\00:46:55.18
Oh... Oh...
00:46:55.21\00:46:57.25
Let me see if I can
show it out on the screen,
00:46:57.31\00:46:58.81
he shows you a delectable cake
00:46:58.85\00:47:02.05
and he says
now, "smell this... "
00:47:02.08\00:47:05.29
Hmmm...
00:47:05.32\00:47:07.36
Okay, all right.
00:47:07.39\00:47:09.82
And now, how are you
going to be able to say,
00:47:09.86\00:47:14.96
"You can't have that"
00:47:15.00\00:47:16.40
Hmmm...
00:47:16.46\00:47:18.17
It's like me putting
this before you and saying,
00:47:18.20\00:47:20.60
"Save it till...
how old are you now...
00:47:20.64\00:47:23.84
fifteen... all right...
00:47:23.87\00:47:26.24
save it till 10 or 15
years later... when you marry. "
00:47:26.27\00:47:29.48
And you've already
had a little taste of it.
00:47:29.51\00:47:32.51
A little taste, a little whiff
and now it's in your system.
00:47:32.55\00:47:34.65
Hmmm... hmmm...
00:47:34.68\00:47:36.02
As Dr. John says,
"Unless you have something else
00:47:36.05\00:47:39.05
to displace that,
it's in your system. "
00:47:39.09\00:47:42.39
And let's talk
about that because we...
00:47:42.42\00:47:45.66
let's talk about the
tools now to break the hold,
00:47:45.69\00:47:50.07
we've got to break this
hold that's on so many people
00:47:50.10\00:47:54.37
that so many
people are dealing with,
00:47:54.40\00:47:56.74
and we want you to know
that if you're dealing with it,
00:47:56.77\00:48:00.01
God can fix it,
00:48:00.04\00:48:02.84
so you can start right
now you don't have to say,
00:48:02.88\00:48:05.68
"Oh, I can't do
it, it's too hard... "
00:48:05.71\00:48:08.38
no, God can do it you
have to make the choice
00:48:08.42\00:48:11.72
let's talk about the
tools now to breaking that hold.
00:48:11.75\00:48:15.49
You know, there are a
couple of different ways,
00:48:15.52\00:48:19.43
the Apostle Paul says,
00:48:19.46\00:48:21.03
"Win some through love,
others... win through fear"
00:48:21.06\00:48:25.43
there are two
different kinds of motivators,
00:48:25.47\00:48:27.64
anyone who has
children knows that
00:48:27.67\00:48:29.57
you can scare one
child into stopping,
00:48:29.60\00:48:31.47
but there's another child,
00:48:31.51\00:48:32.84
you can do anything you
want, you're not scaring them,
00:48:32.87\00:48:34.51
you have to love
that child into stopping.
00:48:34.54\00:48:37.48
So, one... is a
different type of stimulus
00:48:37.51\00:48:41.12
and so, a person
that needs to understand,
00:48:41.15\00:48:44.75
"Okay, first of all, what was it
00:48:44.79\00:48:47.56
that caused me to be
addicted to this thing?
00:48:47.62\00:48:50.26
I have to trace it
back to the source of it
00:48:50.29\00:48:52.86
because when they're now
dealing with this situation
00:48:52.89\00:48:57.37
and they're
putting it before the Lord,
00:48:57.40\00:48:59.27
and the Bible says,
"My people are destroyed
00:48:59.30\00:49:01.57
for lack of...
knowledge... " Hmmm... hmmm...
00:49:01.60\00:49:03.84
If a person knows,
00:49:03.87\00:49:05.54
"Okay, sex deals
with what stimulates you,"
00:49:05.57\00:49:10.05
they begin to know,
00:49:10.08\00:49:11.58
"Okay, what are the things
that I know... stimulates me?
00:49:11.61\00:49:14.02
I need to know what stimulates
me... so I know what to avoid,
00:49:14.05\00:49:16.85
if not, I have no idea"
00:49:16.89\00:49:18.22
and the other thing
that I find spiritually,
00:49:18.25\00:49:22.86
now this is going to sound
strange... embrace yourself,
00:49:22.89\00:49:25.86
are people who
pray for forgiveness
00:49:25.89\00:49:29.36
and receive
forgiveness, it's a bad thing.
00:49:29.40\00:49:33.30
Now you're looking at
me like I have two heads.
00:49:33.34\00:49:35.30
Explain it.
00:49:35.34\00:49:36.81
Because it's
incomplete, the Scriptures say,
00:49:36.84\00:49:41.38
"I'm the Lord,
who forgives your sins
00:49:41.41\00:49:45.38
and heals all
your diseases" Hmmm...
00:49:45.41\00:49:49.35
He's faithful to just...
00:49:49.38\00:49:50.72
He's faithful and just
to forgive us of our sins
00:49:50.75\00:49:53.25
and cleanse us of
all unrighteousness.
00:49:53.29\00:49:55.52
What I find is...
a lot of people say,
00:49:55.56\00:49:57.73
"Lord, forgive me," and
they get the forgiveness
00:49:57.79\00:50:00.53
but they didn't
say, "Heal me... "
00:50:00.56\00:50:03.06
So now they're not
healed and they go back out
00:50:03.10\00:50:07.17
and commit the
same thing again. Why?
00:50:07.24\00:50:08.74
They were forgiven but
they weren't healed from it.
00:50:08.80\00:50:10.97
Hmmm...
00:50:11.01\00:50:12.34
And they are not
thinking "healing"
00:50:12.37\00:50:14.48
so they're not looking for
going towards a healing process
00:50:14.51\00:50:17.95
whether it means... talking
to a doctor like Dr. John,
00:50:17.98\00:50:20.15
whether it means talking to
someone close that you can trust
00:50:20.18\00:50:23.75
and I want to make
a point about that,
00:50:23.79\00:50:25.62
because the
Apostle Paul does say that
00:50:25.65\00:50:27.39
when those situations happen
00:50:27.42\00:50:30.33
and then counseling is happening
00:50:30.36\00:50:31.69
you have to be careful that
someone is not caught up in it
00:50:31.73\00:50:33.86
and themselves
become a castaway,
00:50:33.90\00:50:36.20
because to share
those very intimate moments,
00:50:36.23\00:50:38.90
pull somebody
in... Dr. Yvonne: Yes.
00:50:38.93\00:50:40.74
And as you begin to describe
what you did and what happened,
00:50:40.77\00:50:44.11
the word takes
affect and that movie
00:50:44.14\00:50:47.14
of whatever happened
begins to play in your mind
00:50:47.18\00:50:49.28
and if a person is
not spiritually grounded,
00:50:49.34\00:50:51.38
it can pull... the devil can
use that to pull more people.
00:50:51.41\00:50:55.65
And that's how so many
people get... the counsel...
00:50:55.68\00:51:01.19
the pastor sometimes
with the vulnerable woman
00:51:01.22\00:51:06.13
can get... brought
into a relationship
00:51:06.19\00:51:10.63
that is questionable at best,
00:51:10.67\00:51:14.57
and so, it's... we have
to really think about that.
00:51:14.60\00:51:18.94
We've been having a conversation
00:51:18.97\00:51:21.88
on sexual
immorality and all that,
00:51:21.91\00:51:24.71
but, I think it's
important that the education
00:51:24.78\00:51:29.48
should start in the home
00:51:29.52\00:51:30.85
you know, I think
that a lot of times
00:51:30.89\00:51:33.12
parents are...
00:51:33.15\00:51:34.49
they don't know how
to approach the subject
00:51:34.52\00:51:36.86
they don't know how to talk
about it because it's an awkward
00:51:36.93\00:51:39.83
tense subject to
take to their kids
00:51:39.86\00:51:43.37
but parents, what
you have to realize
00:51:43.43\00:51:46.87
is that, your
kids are going to learn
00:51:46.90\00:51:50.31
one way or another, so
if you're not teaching them
00:51:50.34\00:51:53.38
they're going to
learn in the streets
00:51:53.44\00:51:54.78
and what the streets
are going to teach them,
00:51:54.81\00:51:58.48
is about lust and how
many women can you get...
00:51:58.51\00:52:02.15
Lance: But they're
going to call it love.
00:52:02.18\00:52:04.75
Yes, yes and so...
like you said earlier,
00:52:04.79\00:52:07.29
the devil likes to...
he likes to give you mostly
00:52:07.32\00:52:11.79
truth and throwing
that little bit of lie,
00:52:11.83\00:52:14.93
and that subtle, little
lie, really messes you up.
00:52:14.96\00:52:21.17
Absolutely, you know
another thing that...
00:52:21.20\00:52:23.37
Sister White was
such a great source
00:52:23.41\00:52:26.01
in ways that we
would have never thought
00:52:26.04\00:52:28.54
she said that when
parents are training themselves
00:52:28.58\00:52:32.21
and their children,
they need to understand
00:52:32.28\00:52:34.98
the issues of
how principles work
00:52:35.02\00:52:39.35
because everything
is based on a principle,
00:52:39.39\00:52:41.49
she says... so you can't expect
00:52:41.52\00:52:44.36
you're going to
train a child's brain
00:52:44.39\00:52:47.30
to develop those
Neurons by rewarding them
00:52:47.33\00:52:50.47
with something that's
bad and saying it's good.
00:52:50.50\00:52:53.67
"Oh, you were good today,
00:52:53.70\00:52:55.20
I know you have a
bunch of cavities,
00:52:55.27\00:52:56.74
but... have some candies...
see, don't you love mommy,
00:52:56.77\00:52:59.67
don't you love grandma?"
00:52:59.71\00:53:01.04
you're training them
with the principle that says,
00:53:01.08\00:53:03.71
"This is bad for
you, but when you do good,
00:53:03.75\00:53:06.05
reward yourself with it" Hmmm...
00:53:06.08\00:53:08.35
you know, she says that
00:53:08.38\00:53:09.82
the devil is not
going to come to you
00:53:09.88\00:53:12.19
this is in
"Counsels on Diet and Food"
00:53:12.22\00:53:14.46
and say, "All
right... well you know...
00:53:14.52\00:53:17.09
it's wrong but do
it anyway... with sex"
00:53:17.13\00:53:19.66
he's going to
say, "You know what?
00:53:19.69\00:53:22.83
your doctor says,
00:53:22.86\00:53:25.00
you're getting to
be a little overweight
00:53:25.03\00:53:27.87
and you're
beginning to have diabetes,
00:53:27.90\00:53:30.71
you know, it's not the
best but it smells so good,
00:53:30.74\00:53:33.71
just reward yourself,
00:53:33.74\00:53:35.21
you know, you were good
all last week on that diet,
00:53:35.24\00:53:37.81
just reward
yourself with a little slice"
00:53:37.85\00:53:40.18
and she says, and in doing that,
00:53:40.22\00:53:43.02
in doing that,
00:53:43.05\00:53:44.62
the principle that
you're saying to yourself is,
00:53:44.65\00:53:47.99
"I know it's wrong for
me but it tastes so good"
00:53:48.02\00:53:50.93
Hmmm...
00:53:50.96\00:53:52.29
"I know it's bad for me,
00:53:52.33\00:53:53.66
but I'm going to
reward myself with it"
00:53:53.70\00:53:56.90
and many times when
husbands cheat on wives
00:53:56.93\00:54:00.27
and wives cheat on
husbands, I've heard them say,
00:54:00.30\00:54:02.60
"You know what, I
know it was wrong,
00:54:02.64\00:54:04.64
but I deserved better,
00:54:04.67\00:54:07.31
I deserved this moment. "
00:54:07.34\00:54:09.88
I've literally heard,
wives and husbands say,
00:54:09.94\00:54:12.95
"I know Jesus said
that this is wrong,
00:54:12.98\00:54:15.22
but I need this right now,"
00:54:15.28\00:54:17.29
and that's the
atmosphere that Satan creates.
00:54:17.32\00:54:21.49
I think that
applies to a lot of things
00:54:21.52\00:54:23.43
I mean... Ellen
White, I'm not sure,
00:54:23.46\00:54:25.29
in which of her
writings it's in,
00:54:25.33\00:54:27.13
I don't know if
it's in "Adventist Home"
00:54:27.16\00:54:28.66
or "Letters to Young
Lovers" or something like that
00:54:28.73\00:54:31.10
but it's about how
we, as human beings,
00:54:31.13\00:54:34.70
like to justify and
rationalize our sin,
00:54:34.74\00:54:38.01
because we're
comfortable in our sins,
00:54:38.04\00:54:41.28
and so we try and find reasons
00:54:41.31\00:54:43.81
to make it seem
like it's not so bad.
00:54:43.85\00:54:47.58
Because we want the pleasure
but we don't want the guilt.
00:54:47.62\00:54:49.28
You know...
00:54:49.32\00:54:51.85
and we'll find a reason
00:54:51.89\00:54:55.22
you know, even God
confessed it of us,
00:54:55.26\00:54:57.49
he said, "Behold man is become
one of us knowing good and evil"
00:54:57.53\00:55:00.06
and then He said,
of the antediluvians...
00:55:00.10\00:55:01.83
he said, "Listen, the thing
00:55:01.86\00:55:03.60
that they have
set their mind to do,
00:55:03.67\00:55:05.20
nothing shall be
impossible for them to do it. "
00:55:05.23\00:55:08.27
Hmmm...
00:55:08.30\00:55:09.64
He said, "So now, let's
confound their language"
00:55:09.67\00:55:12.81
Well, guess what? If a
person is decided that...
00:55:12.84\00:55:16.14
"Listen, I don't see
anything wrong with this,"
00:55:16.21\00:55:19.21
they will find a
way to justify it
00:55:19.25\00:55:22.05
and give every
reasonable excuse,
00:55:22.08\00:55:24.85
I'm sure as a therapist,
Dr. John has probably heard
00:55:24.89\00:55:26.99
many "justifications"
for what's being done.
00:55:27.02\00:55:30.59
So, if someone is
caught up in this stronghold,
00:55:30.63\00:55:34.16
give us a few
things to do to stop it.
00:55:34.20\00:55:38.30
Number one, I'll give you three,
00:55:38.33\00:55:40.30
because I know
we're wrapping up,
00:55:40.34\00:55:42.20
the physical, the
mental and the spiritual,
00:55:42.24\00:55:43.71
physically... educate yourself,
00:55:43.74\00:55:46.68
get information about it,
00:55:46.71\00:55:50.18
you know, "My people are
destroyed for lack of knowledge"
00:55:50.21\00:55:52.75
it's so grossly... understated
and so grossly... underutilized.
00:55:52.78\00:55:56.69
Get information so
you could understand
00:55:56.72\00:55:59.42
what you're dealing with
you can handle something better
00:55:59.45\00:56:02.12
when you know about
it and understand it,
00:56:02.16\00:56:04.36
you may see that,
"Ah, these lights are here"
00:56:04.39\00:56:06.66
but if you have no idea
what controls the lights,
00:56:06.70\00:56:08.86
you're trying to climb up on
a ladder that you can't get on
00:56:08.93\00:56:11.70
to touch a hot light
that's going to burn your hand
00:56:11.73\00:56:14.80
and then you touch
it and it burns you,
00:56:14.84\00:56:16.17
"I'm not trying that
again" not knowing that,
00:56:16.20\00:56:18.14
"No, you just
didn't learn about it,
00:56:18.17\00:56:19.57
go to the wall and
flip the switch off,"
00:56:19.61\00:56:20.98
so get educated. Hmmm... hmmm...
00:56:21.01\00:56:22.68
Mentally, also,
understand those things
00:56:22.74\00:56:26.98
that affect you
mentally, some of it is diet...
00:56:27.02\00:56:29.82
you know, there
are certain foods that
00:56:29.85\00:56:32.62
help produce more
serotonin and less serotonin
00:56:32.65\00:56:35.66
and things of that nature,
but the most important thing
00:56:35.69\00:56:38.63
is the spiritual
part, you have to feed on...
00:56:38.66\00:56:43.00
just like you fed
on the word of Satan
00:56:43.03\00:56:44.93
that got you into that sin
00:56:44.97\00:56:46.67
and you fed on the word
of Satan and your "friends"
00:56:46.74\00:56:49.54
that kept you in that sin,
00:56:49.60\00:56:50.97
you need to feed
on something else
00:56:51.01\00:56:53.34
that's going to
displace that word.
00:56:53.38\00:56:55.68
When the devil makes you
say, "Jesus is coming soon,
00:56:55.71\00:56:59.48
this sin is too strong,
00:56:59.51\00:57:00.98
you are never
going to give it up,
00:57:01.02\00:57:02.65
you might as well
just keep going...
00:57:02.68\00:57:04.02
eat, drink and be
merry, for tomorrow you die,"
00:57:04.05\00:57:06.02
you got to get
that Word that says,
00:57:06.05\00:57:07.99
"No, I'll never
leave you or forsake you,
00:57:08.02\00:57:09.89
I am the one that
will work in you. "
00:57:09.92\00:57:11.63
Get that Word in... and
just be honest with God.
00:57:11.66\00:57:14.66
And don't put
yourself in a position
00:57:14.70\00:57:17.47
where you can
yield to temptation.
00:57:17.50\00:57:19.50
That's right.
00:57:19.53\00:57:21.04
Stay out of that atmosphere.
00:57:21.07\00:57:22.40
Yeah, don't go to that room
00:57:22.44\00:57:23.77
listening to
Teddy P late at night.
00:57:23.81\00:57:25.47
That's right, that's right,
00:57:25.51\00:57:27.68
know your
triggers... know your triggers,
00:57:27.71\00:57:29.11
I can't believe that
00:57:29.14\00:57:31.31
we have reached the
end of another Program,
00:57:31.35\00:57:32.91
thank you so much,
Brother Lance, for being with us
00:57:32.95\00:57:35.58
thank you Dr. John Jacob.
00:57:35.62\00:57:37.52
Praise God, you're welcome.
00:57:37.55\00:57:39.09
What a blessing you were,
00:57:39.12\00:57:40.89
what a blessing
were, Brother Lance,
00:57:40.92\00:57:42.66
my dear Jason,
00:57:42.69\00:57:44.13
thank you so much
for being with us,
00:57:44.16\00:57:47.50
and thank you...
00:57:47.53\00:57:48.86
make sure that
you join us next time,
00:57:48.90\00:57:50.57
and know that God
has a plan for you,
00:57:50.60\00:57:52.53
He's going to take care of it,
00:57:52.57\00:57:54.40
just turn it over
to Him and trust Him.
00:57:54.47\00:57:56.87
Join us next time
because you know what?
00:57:56.91\00:57:59.44
It just wouldn't be
the same without you.
00:57:59.47\00:58:02.01