Hi, my name is Cheri and
welcome to Teen Pathways.
00:00:20.13\00:00:22.55
We are talking about depression
00:00:22.82\00:00:24.85
and every time we
start to discuss depression,
00:00:25.00\00:00:28.52
I always think:
"How depressing,"
00:00:28.55\00:00:30.64
"who wants to hear
about a show on depression?",
00:00:30.68\00:00:32.63
but they say:
"Depression is a common cold. "
00:00:32.85\00:00:35.88
in the mental health
field, that depression is so
00:00:36.04\00:00:38.67
common that most
people that you sit down with
00:00:40.00\00:00:43.21
are going to say:
"I've experienced that,
00:00:43.24\00:00:44.67
"I know what you're talking
about", and have a story.
00:00:44.71\00:00:46.82
So we're going to
talk about that today.
00:00:46.85\00:00:48.89
I want to first introduce
you to the guests that we have,
00:00:48.93\00:00:51.51
and these folks are
from all over the country.
00:00:51.60\00:00:54.34
They have come from different
00:00:54.37\00:00:56.00
backgrounds and I want to say
thank you very much for sharing
00:00:56.04\00:01:00.14
your own experiences with
us, and helping us to maybe help
00:01:00.18\00:01:04.25
somebody else to explore
what they are dealing with.
00:01:04.28\00:01:06.99
Can we start
with you, who are you?
00:01:07.70\00:01:09.43
where did you come from?
00:01:09.46\00:01:11.59
My name is Lori Sproat,
and I came from Eagle, Idaho.
00:01:11.63\00:01:15.25
My name is Paddy McCoy
and I started out very early,
00:01:16.90\00:01:19.57
coming from my mother
that is, [everyone laughs]
00:01:20.17\00:01:23.42
okay, I always have
to throw something in,
00:01:23.45\00:01:27.14
but I go to school in
Walla Walla, Washington,
00:01:27.35\00:01:30.34
at Walla Walla College.
00:01:30.37\00:01:33.21
My name is Cherry Malott
and I live in [?], Florida.
00:01:35.35\00:01:39.79
Hi, I'm Jackie
Ravine and I too, go to
00:01:40.43\00:01:42.61
Walla Walla College, though I'm
originally from Dayton, Ohio.
00:01:42.65\00:01:46.24
My name is Jason Henry, I'm
from the blooming metropolis
00:01:47.51\00:01:50.89
of Sweet Home, Oregon.
00:01:50.92\00:01:53.21
And my name Tim Blackburn
and I'm from Eagle, Idaho.
00:01:53.57\00:01:58.36
Okay, welcome.
00:01:58.39\00:01:59.90
So let's start with, I
hear a lot of definitions
00:02:00.37\00:02:03.95
of depression, and
what do you guys think?
00:02:03.98\00:02:06.69
What is it? What is depression?
00:02:06.72\00:02:08.87
I think depression is
a numbness from a void
00:02:09.49\00:02:14.77
that you have,
like the loss of a close
00:02:14.80\00:02:18.37
relative, or a family member,
or a friend that you were
00:02:18.41\00:02:21.57
really good
friends with, close to.
00:02:21.60\00:02:23.63
I think it's also from a
lot of pain, a lot of hurt
00:02:24.11\00:02:27.55
that you've had,
but it causes you
00:02:27.58\00:02:29.49
to be numb inside, so you don't
react to anything, you may not
00:02:29.53\00:02:33.54
even do anything: take
care of yourself anymore
00:02:34.39\00:02:36.93
or anything like that. It
just causes you to block out
00:02:37.09\00:02:40.48
everything that surrounds you.
00:02:40.51\00:02:42.42
I'm glad you said that,
when I experienced depression,
00:02:42.46\00:02:44.79
one of the things I thought
was really strange was I felt
00:02:44.82\00:02:47.08
like I was detached, I couldn't
hardly feel myself physically,
00:02:47.12\00:02:50.06
so I felt emotionally
numb, but I felt like I was
00:02:50.09\00:02:52.59
physically numb.
00:02:52.62\00:02:55.04
One of the difficult things
things, I think, about defining
00:02:56.34\00:02:58.54
depression, at
least in my understanding,
00:02:58.57\00:03:00.79
and the limited experience
that I've had with it,
00:03:00.83\00:03:04.15
is that it's so hard
to say what depression is
00:03:04.19\00:03:07.16
because it's, like
you said, it's a numbness,
00:03:07.20\00:03:10.14
it's what is not,
depression is a void,
00:03:11.25\00:03:14.33
it's absence,
00:03:14.36\00:03:15.97
it's not necessarily
sadness or bad feelings,
00:03:16.01\00:03:19.37
or bad occurrence, it's
not something that is there,
00:03:19.41\00:03:22.59
it's an absence, it's a void.
00:03:22.62\00:03:24.21
Yeah, isn't that what's so hard
to understand about depression
00:03:24.24\00:03:26.93
because in my thinking
it's on a different level
00:03:26.96\00:03:30.45
for each person that
experiences depression.
00:03:30.48\00:03:33.94
So how can you fit
it into a category,
00:03:34.39\00:03:37.06
other than saying,
generalizing that it's some kind
00:03:37.10\00:03:39.24
of a numbness?
00:03:39.27\00:03:40.57
I worked at a
hospital for a while,
00:03:40.61\00:03:42.17
and people would
come in depressed
00:03:42.20\00:03:43.69
and one of the first
things they would say is that
00:03:43.73\00:03:46.17
"if one more person tells
me to keep my chin up... "
00:03:46.25\00:03:51.37
You know? It's like,
did you pray about it?
00:03:53.13\00:03:55.23
I've prayed about
it, I've kept my chin up,
00:03:55.97\00:03:57.93
I've done what I can
do, so has anybody had that
00:03:57.97\00:04:00.24
sense that it's just
overwhelming, it's something
00:04:00.27\00:04:02.51
that seems to...
00:04:02.54\00:04:04.31
It's isolating more than
just about anything else.
00:04:04.88\00:04:07.93
Having a void, and
feeling an absence,
00:04:08.50\00:04:10.66
you're not able to
make, I wasn't able to make,
00:04:10.81\00:04:13.58
connections with
people, not even loved ones,
00:04:13.61\00:04:16.31
people that were very close,
let alone socially speaking.
00:04:16.35\00:04:20.08
So, because it's like this
inability to make connections
00:04:20.22\00:04:23.65
it's an isolating thing,
and the more somebody says:
00:04:23.68\00:04:27.08
"Here's what you need to
do: smile, keep your chin up,"
00:04:27.45\00:04:30.33
"the glass is half full,
look at yourself in the mirror"
00:04:30.39\00:04:32.86
"everyday and
say: "I'm good enough,"
00:04:32.89\00:04:35.31
"I'm smart
enough, people like me. "
00:04:35.34\00:04:37.73
It's very
isolating, it really is.
00:04:38.11\00:04:40.98
That's true, that
positive thinking bit.
00:04:41.02\00:04:42.77
Yeah! I mean, there is a
place for that, it's based
00:04:42.89\00:04:45.60
on something.
00:04:45.63\00:04:47.20
On the other side of it
too, is that the person's that's
00:04:47.50\00:04:50.11
trying to relate to
the one who is depressed
00:04:50.14\00:04:52.79
has a hard time.
00:04:52.82\00:04:54.33
Like in high school
I looked at depression
00:04:54.37\00:04:57.51
and I couldn't figure
it out because I was weird
00:04:57.55\00:04:59.55
and just happy.
00:04:59.58\00:05:01.16
Whoa, what are you doing here?
00:05:01.83\00:05:04.10
I know! But I remember saying
00:05:04.30\00:05:07.98
that I thought depression
was such a waste of time.
00:05:08.02\00:05:10.53
It came from my
ignorance that I would say that
00:05:11.46\00:05:13.61
because I didn't understand.
00:05:13.64\00:05:14.91
When I was depressed I
thought I was going crazy.
00:05:14.95\00:05:17.79
It was like: I
can't eat, I can't sleep,
00:05:18.09\00:05:20.87
I can't do
anything, I'm not happy,
00:05:20.90\00:05:22.75
what's wrong with me?
Why do I feel this way?
00:05:22.98\00:05:25.58
Maybe I'm nuts...
I'm just going psycho.
00:05:26.43\00:05:29.29
It's a chemical imbalance in
the brain caused by genetics,
00:05:30.09\00:05:35.16
or some bad thing that's
happened to you in your life.
00:05:35.20\00:05:40.24
So you're saying for
some it may be chemical.
00:05:40.27\00:05:42.63
Did you have
depression in your family?
00:05:42.67\00:05:44.35
Yes. Depression
runs in my family.
00:05:44.38\00:05:47.98
A couple of my aunts
have it and I have some uncles
00:05:50.43\00:05:52.61
that have it, and so
it's one of those things.
00:05:52.64\00:05:55.71
Talk about a family heirloom.
00:05:55.74\00:05:57.44
"Let me pass this down. "
00:05:58.47\00:05:59.87
You know what's really tough
for me too, is that depression
00:05:59.91\00:06:02.74
is one that we don't talk
about either, so if it runs
00:06:02.77\00:06:05.20
in your family like,
somebody would come up
00:06:05.23\00:06:07.51
and say: "Oh, you have
beautiful eyes, just like"
00:06:07.55\00:06:09.14
"your grandmother. "
00:06:09.17\00:06:10.89
They don't say:
"Oh, you have your"
00:06:10.93\00:06:11.95
"father's depression. "
00:06:11.98\00:06:13.14
That's right. [Everybody laughs]
00:06:13.18\00:06:15.53
So that to me would be a
harder thing to understand
00:06:16.27\00:06:19.28
about yourself as it's hitting
you or as you're coming into
00:06:19.32\00:06:22.95
a time that you feel like:
"Maybe something's hitting me. "
00:06:23.07\00:06:25.29
Nobody in your family's
going to tell you you're prone
00:06:25.32\00:06:28.14
to depression, or you have
that genetically and be careful
00:06:28.17\00:06:30.96
before you slip in.
00:06:31.47\00:06:32.87
I think what you were
saying is that there's a time
00:06:32.91\00:06:34.58
where that's appropriate,
to look in the mirror and say:
00:06:34.62\00:06:36.34
"I'm happy. " or "Your ok. ",
00:06:36.37\00:06:38.21
but that's at, I think,
the earlier part of depression
00:06:38.25\00:06:40.57
and as you're
coming out of depression,
00:06:40.60\00:06:42.19
but in the middle,
who's been in the middle?
00:06:42.23\00:06:45.60
Sitting there saying:
"I don't know how to do"
00:06:45.63\00:06:48.97
"this anymore. I
don't know how to"
00:06:49.00\00:06:50.67
"move anymore. "
00:06:50.70\00:06:52.43
I think that's part
of what depression is,
00:06:52.53\00:06:55.74
feeling like no
matter what you do
00:06:55.77\00:06:57.72
it just doesn't
have a good effect,
00:06:57.75\00:06:59.63
it's like you feel
useless or your actions
00:06:59.67\00:07:02.98
are not
accomplishing anything good,
00:07:03.01\00:07:06.27
you're not
contributing something.
00:07:06.30\00:07:09.53
For me personally,
depression, when I really
00:07:10.65\00:07:13.29
went through it in the early
teen years, was a growing thing.
00:07:13.33\00:07:17.01
It started out small and
it just seemed to go to seed
00:07:17.13\00:07:19.95
like weeds in your back yard,
and just, kind of, took over
00:07:19.99\00:07:23.43
the back yard in my life.
00:07:23.46\00:07:25.60
As a little kid I
was very rambunctious,
00:07:28.88\00:07:31.03
happy go lucky kind of kid,
but as I went through crisis
00:07:31.07\00:07:34.80
in my life, didn't
know how to deal with it,
00:07:34.83\00:07:37.64
thought it could be my
fault, but then people told me:
00:07:38.32\00:07:40.90
"Oh, it's really not your
fault. " Well, what is it then?
00:07:40.93\00:07:43.73
Then, pretty soon, it's like
nothing makes sense anymore,
00:07:43.77\00:07:46.54
and the things that are
supposed to make sense don't.
00:07:46.85\00:07:49.79
For me, that's part of
what depression was too,
00:07:49.82\00:07:52.57
not
understanding, being confused,
00:07:52.83\00:07:54.75
and not having any answers,
00:07:55.12\00:07:56.95
not having any way
to deal with those hurts
00:07:58.13\00:08:01.00
and the pain of
changes... and stuff.
00:08:01.03\00:08:04.17
Exactly. Anyone else?
00:08:04.96\00:08:07.04
What do you think
Cherry? Depression...
00:08:07.28\00:08:09.56
I don't know. I
was really depressed
00:08:09.59\00:08:11.80
and I had a lot of
problems because my depression
00:08:11.84\00:08:15.54
started with losing my
grandpa when I was 8 years old,
00:08:15.58\00:08:19.06
and then it got worse later
on because about a year later
00:08:19.42\00:08:22.69
I found out that
my dad had cancer,
00:08:22.72\00:08:24.69
and these were
people that I really loved,
00:08:25.16\00:08:27.06
and here they're sick and
dying and it was really hard.
00:08:27.10\00:08:31.32
I remember you told me before
that you were really close
00:08:33.19\00:08:35.72
to your grandfather
and you spent a lot of time
00:08:35.75\00:08:37.73
with him over at his house.
00:08:37.76\00:08:39.96
It was like, whenever I
had a problem at school,
00:08:40.00\00:08:42.03
like with a friend or something,
I could go there and be with him
00:08:42.07\00:08:44.51
and he would always
make me laugh and stuff,
00:08:44.54\00:08:46.73
but then he was just
gone and I had nobody
00:08:46.92\00:08:49.25
for a little bit. I
did, but I didn't realize it.
00:08:49.29\00:08:52.57
What was your dad's
cancer? What was that about?
00:08:52.98\00:08:56.49
Well, he has a cancerous
brain tumor and they found
00:08:56.89\00:08:59.85
that out about a year
later after my grandpa died
00:08:59.89\00:09:02.82
and that was scary
because he had to have
00:09:02.85\00:09:04.81
brain surgeries and he
almost died a couple of times.
00:09:04.85\00:09:08.01
It was really scary
because I loved him,
00:09:08.96\00:09:11.18
and he's not the
same man he used to be,
00:09:11.60\00:09:14.26
so it's hard, but at
least he's still alive.
00:09:14.30\00:09:16.93
They cut out a
portion of his brain, right?
00:09:17.44\00:09:19.36
Yeah.
00:09:19.45\00:09:20.42
Like the size of a fist.
00:09:20.43\00:09:21.51
Yeah.
00:09:21.54\00:09:22.51
So there's a lot of
changes, so what'd you do?
00:09:22.52\00:09:24.99
Because I listened
to you and I'm thinking:
00:09:26.57\00:09:28.80
"How would I deal with that
at 8 years old, 9 years old,"
00:09:28.84\00:09:31.64
"10 years old?" When
you went into a depression,
00:09:31.67\00:09:35.04
what did your
depression look like?
00:09:35.07\00:09:36.80
I just felt
like I wasn't as good
00:09:37.56\00:09:40.06
as anybody else,
everybody was better than me,
00:09:40.16\00:09:42.17
I was just worthless. I
didn't feel good about myself,
00:09:43.57\00:09:48.27
life was just... blah.
00:09:48.30\00:09:50.70
I just...kind of...I don't know.
00:09:51.86\00:09:54.87
In those situations
some of you that have
00:09:56.49\00:09:58.52
experienced it more severely
than some of us who have been
00:09:58.56\00:10:02.74
blessed to not have to
experience it so deeply,
00:10:02.77\00:10:06.76
what do you seek, or need,
00:10:06.92\00:10:09.59
or what can
outside people offer?
00:10:09.63\00:10:11.87
We can't make it better.
00:10:11.90\00:10:13.64
There are things like
prayer and/or medication,
00:10:13.68\00:10:17.64
and some real personal
introspection and self discovery
00:10:17.88\00:10:21.88
that may lend to
curing it, or dealing with it,
00:10:23.46\00:10:26.81
I guess is a
better way of putting it,
00:10:26.84\00:10:28.22
what can other
people in your lives,
00:10:28.42\00:10:30.22
what can we watch for
and what can we offer?
00:10:30.90\00:10:33.68
One thing you need to
watch for is lots of energy,
00:10:34.00\00:10:36.73
lots of appetite,
just lots of personality,
00:10:36.76\00:10:40.24
a person who's really
really aggravated all the time,
00:10:40.74\00:10:43.79
every little
thing makes them mad,
00:10:44.30\00:10:46.39
just little things like
that, just obvious things,
00:10:46.42\00:10:49.60
and a person that wants to
be alone a lot of the time,
00:10:49.64\00:10:52.81
some people are
moody, but people usually
00:10:54.62\00:10:57.29
with depression are moody,
they could be happy one minute
00:10:57.33\00:10:59.78
and then just bawling
their eyes out the next.
00:10:59.81\00:11:02.05
So you just have to
watch for things like that.
00:11:02.55\00:11:05.08
For me, as a guy, they
say that guys tend to be
00:11:06.16\00:11:11.05
"fix it" orientated, I
just want to fix the problem,
00:11:11.18\00:11:13.63
but there are personality
types that just want to fix
00:11:15.12\00:11:18.21
the problem.
00:11:18.24\00:11:19.81
Depression, as with many other
things, might be a lifetime
00:11:19.92\00:11:22.86
struggle.
00:11:23.28\00:11:24.31
All of us have struggles
that we'll probably struggle
00:11:24.35\00:11:26.31
with our whole
lives, and by God's grace
00:11:26.34\00:11:28.88
we can keep having
victory over that thing,
00:11:28.91\00:11:31.42
but we need to realize
that depression for some people
00:11:31.68\00:11:34.33
is one of those
life-long struggles
00:11:34.36\00:11:36.37
and it may not be something
that we can fix right away.
00:11:36.41\00:11:38.44
For me, something that somebody
could probably do that would
00:11:39.69\00:11:43.14
help me, is just to say: "I
accept you just how you are,"
00:11:43.18\00:11:46.60
"you may be depressed,
but I still care about you,"
00:11:46.70\00:11:49.10
"and maybe we can't
just fix this like that,"
00:11:49.13\00:11:51.56
"but we're going
to work through it. "
00:11:51.59\00:11:54.52
You know what helped me?
00:11:55.00\00:11:56.88
One time I remember
reading through the Bible
00:11:56.92\00:11:58.78
and I read the story of David
and his depression for a year.
00:11:58.82\00:12:01.97
It was like all of a
sudden I said: "Here's somebody"
00:12:02.08\00:12:04.76
"that is ranting
and raving and saying"
00:12:04.79\00:12:07.29
"my pillow was soaked at
night, I feel like my bones"
00:12:07.63\00:12:09.97
"are dried up. It
seems like I can't even"
00:12:10.00\00:12:13.26
"move or breath or anything. "
00:12:13.44\00:12:15.63
I was so grateful to
see that in Psalms later on,
00:12:15.67\00:12:18.92
where he talks about:
"And I love you Lord. "
00:12:18.95\00:12:21.71
"Thank you for
giving me back my life,"
00:12:21.74\00:12:23.39
"and thank you for
filling me with joy. "
00:12:23.42\00:12:25.00
And all of a sudden I got
hope that there are other people
00:12:25.04\00:12:26.87
that have been depressed.
00:12:26.90\00:12:28.99
With David too, when I
got into my depression,
00:12:29.03\00:12:31.08
all of a sudden
everything looked dark.
00:12:31.11\00:12:32.71
It was like I was going:
00:12:33.55\00:12:35.56
"Everything looks dark,
and the world looks dark,"
00:12:35.60\00:12:37.99
"and the
president's going to court,"
00:12:38.02\00:12:39.91
"and some kid just walked
into a school yard a shot"
00:12:39.95\00:12:42.81
"these classrooms. " And all of
a sudden not only my own sadness
00:12:42.85\00:12:45.56
and my own loss, but
it seemed like everything
00:12:45.59\00:12:48.15
was happening everywhere,
and the only hope I got,
00:12:48.18\00:12:50.71
the only hope I got was to say
there are promises in the Bible,
00:12:51.12\00:12:55.71
there are promises of heaven,
there are promises of all that
00:12:55.74\00:13:00.30
that I can somehow hold on
to when I'm feeling like I can't
00:13:00.40\00:13:03.87
hold on to anything else.
00:13:03.97\00:13:06.06
That reminds me...
00:13:08.19\00:13:09.72
Yeah, we actually have a
scene that talks about...
00:13:09.76\00:13:12.75
it's a dialogue I guess,
00:13:13.16\00:13:16.30
part of it has to do
with current world view
00:13:17.24\00:13:19.87
and maybe a world view
that someone who's depressed
00:13:19.91\00:13:22.62
may have, or just observations.
00:13:22.65\00:13:25.99
Then the other side of it
is the hopeful perspective
00:13:26.03\00:13:29.07
of what may very
well be waiting for us,
00:13:29.10\00:13:30.85
some of the promises
that the Bible offers.
00:13:30.89\00:13:32.61
Can you do that?
00:13:33.06\00:13:34.68
What I believe is that
sometimes with some struggles
00:13:34.72\00:13:38.17
that the hope is
that this is not our home.
00:13:38.33\00:13:41.76
So, can you do that?
00:13:41.89\00:13:43.68
Yeah, we'd love to, thank you.
00:13:43.72\00:13:45.81
It's pretty heavy...
00:13:47.00\00:13:48.89
...but it is
depression we're talking about.
00:13:49.27\00:13:51.49
Guess it can't very
well be farcical, can it?
00:13:51.80\00:13:54.01
Okay... [both
clear their throats].
00:13:55.43\00:13:57.87
Sometimes I wish I
could cease to exist.
00:14:00.02\00:14:02.77
It would be my... conscientious
objection against society.
00:14:03.44\00:14:07.35
It's this... this place,
Earth in general, it just isn't
00:14:07.56\00:14:10.78
right for me.
00:14:10.81\00:14:12.45
Come to think of it, it
isn't right for you either.
00:14:13.04\00:14:15.65
You see, we're not
supposed to be here.
00:14:16.00\00:14:18.09
We were created perfect.
00:14:18.39\00:14:21.94
My name is Ellen. Ellen White,
00:14:21.98\00:14:25.36
and my friends, many years ago,
00:14:25.73\00:14:28.85
I saw a vision of our
home to be in the New Earth,
00:14:28.89\00:14:35.04
with Jesus at our head,
we descended out of heaven
00:14:36.03\00:14:39.79
from the great
city, down to this Earth
00:14:39.82\00:14:42.57
and there was a mighty
plain, and then we looked up
00:14:42.78\00:14:46.56
and saw the great
city coming down from God
00:14:46.59\00:14:49.57
out of heaven and it settled
on the place where we stood.
00:14:49.61\00:14:53.43
But we walked
outside of the city to see
00:14:53.71\00:14:56.28
the glories that lay there,
and there I saw many houses
00:14:56.32\00:15:00.14
made of silver,
which were to be inhabited
00:15:00.17\00:15:04.13
by the saints, and in
each was a golden shelf.
00:15:04.17\00:15:08.10
I watched as many of the
saints walked in to the houses,
00:15:08.50\00:15:12.23
took off their glittering crowns
00:15:12.38\00:15:14.88
and laid them on
the golden shelf,
00:15:14.91\00:15:17.38
and walked out of the
houses to a field nearby.
00:15:17.63\00:15:21.31
A light shone about their
heads as they were continuously
00:15:21.92\00:15:25.85
offering praise to God.
00:15:25.88\00:15:29.20
I went to Chicago once,
you know what the welcoming
00:15:29.83\00:15:32.79
side is as you're
driving into the city?
00:15:32.82\00:15:35.21
It's the factories.
00:15:35.28\00:15:37.12
They're pouring tones of
thick, black, billowing smoke
00:15:37.24\00:15:39.85
into the air.
00:15:39.88\00:15:41.51
There's just something
wrong about living in a society
00:15:41.95\00:15:44.93
where a building
has the capacity to turn
00:15:44.96\00:15:47.98
day into night time.
00:15:48.02\00:15:50.16
I don't know, for all I
know, it's the same in New York
00:15:50.59\00:15:52.45
and Los Angeles too, you know?
00:15:52.48\00:15:54.36
It just isn't right.
00:15:55.06\00:15:57.29
Then I saw many flowers.
And as I plucked the flowers,
00:15:57.40\00:16:01.97
I cried out:
"These will never fade. "
00:16:02.00\00:16:05.63
And then there was a
field of grass, tall grass,
00:16:06.40\00:16:09.30
and it was a living green.
00:16:09.33\00:16:12.33
It had the appearance of silver
and gold as it waved proudly
00:16:12.60\00:16:17.22
to the glory of King Jesus.
00:16:17.25\00:16:20.46
Then we came to another field
where there were many beasts,
00:16:21.10\00:16:24.98
the lion and the lamb,
the leopard and the wolf,
00:16:25.41\00:16:28.87
all lay together
in perfect harmony.
00:16:28.90\00:16:32.27
And they followed peaceably
after us as we passed through,
00:16:32.51\00:16:36.90
and we came to a wood next,
00:16:36.93\00:16:39.83
but not like our
woods: dark, dirty. No!
00:16:40.06\00:16:44.45
But all over,
light and beautiful,
00:16:44.95\00:16:48.68
with the trees waving
to and fro, but we passed
00:16:48.81\00:16:52.99
through the wood, for we
were on our way to Mt. Zion.
00:16:53.03\00:16:57.47
Next I saw a company of
others who were also gazing
00:16:58.22\00:17:02.77
at the wonders of this place.
00:17:02.80\00:17:05.27
As we greeted them, I
asked Jesus who they were.
00:17:05.39\00:17:09.12
For I noticed that
their robes were pure white,
00:17:09.15\00:17:12.85
and their garments had
red as a border around them,
00:17:13.22\00:17:17.08
and their crowns were brilliant.
00:17:17.11\00:17:20.24
When I asked Jesus
who they were, He said
00:17:20.57\00:17:24.43
they were martyrs who
had been slain for Him.
00:17:24.46\00:17:28.29
With them was an innumerable
company of little ones.
00:17:29.11\00:17:35.25
Things have
gotten way out of hand.
00:17:35.95\00:17:38.82
There's just something
wrong about living in a society
00:17:39.45\00:17:42.19
where 1 out of 3
women are raped every year.
00:17:42.22\00:17:45.13
These women are our
wives, our sisters, our mothers,
00:17:45.97\00:17:49.18
our daughters
and our girlfriends.
00:17:49.21\00:17:51.75
And kids...
00:17:54.65\00:17:56.16
Every year 3
million children are abused.
00:17:57.40\00:18:00.09
And those are only the
cases that are reported.
00:18:00.13\00:18:03.18
Every day they're
having their souls ripped
00:18:04.15\00:18:08.03
out of their weak, weak grasp,
00:18:08.66\00:18:12.09
while someone they
look up to abuses them.
00:18:13.04\00:18:18.32
Mt. Zion was just ahead
and there was a temple on it.
00:18:19.00\00:18:23.68
And around it
were 7 other mountains
00:18:23.82\00:18:26.06
on which grew roses and lilies.
00:18:26.09\00:18:28.91
I watched as the little ones
climbed, or if they so chose,
00:18:29.24\00:18:35.79
used their little
wings to fly to the top
00:18:36.33\00:18:39.11
of the mountains, and
pluck the never fading flowers.
00:18:39.15\00:18:43.96
The beauties I there
saw, I can not describe.
00:18:45.96\00:18:50.71
Oh, that I could speak
in the language of Canaan,
00:18:51.79\00:18:54.63
and then perhaps I
could tell just a little
00:18:55.09\00:18:58.05
of the glory of
the better place.
00:18:58.09\00:19:00.74
Jesus walked ahead
of us into the city.
00:19:02.88\00:19:06.50
But soon we heard His
lovely voice calling out to us:
00:19:07.23\00:19:10.38
"Come in my people, to
sup, for you have come"
00:19:10.41\00:19:14.17
"through great
tribulation, you have suffered,"
00:19:14.20\00:19:17.93
"but you have done My will,
come in, for I will gird Myself"
00:19:18.01\00:19:23.16
"and I will serve you. "
00:19:23.19\00:19:25.91
As I went into the city,
I saw a table of pure silver
00:19:26.47\00:19:30.50
which extended many miles
in length, and yet my eyes
00:19:30.53\00:19:34.53
could pass over it.
00:19:34.56\00:19:36.55
And on that table there
was the fruit of the tree
00:19:36.97\00:19:40.15
of life, the manna,
00:19:40.18\00:19:42.44
and the figs, and the
almonds, and many other
00:19:42.94\00:19:45.94
kinds of fruit.
00:19:45.97\00:19:48.30
Nobody belongs here,
00:19:48.72\00:19:51.24
but here we are.
00:19:52.06\00:19:54.29
We think and speak and laugh
and sing and do things of all
00:19:54.94\00:19:58.06
kinds on purpose.
00:19:58.09\00:20:00.31
We do all these things
because we don't belong here.
00:20:00.35\00:20:04.76
This is not our home.
00:20:05.33\00:20:07.43
Look around you, this is a cave.
00:20:07.56\00:20:10.64
What are we doing in a cave?
00:20:11.33\00:20:13.99
We're meant to
be with the angels.
00:20:14.19\00:20:17.32
What are we
doing in these bodies?
00:20:17.35\00:20:20.45
For some reason,
we're trying so hard,
00:20:20.65\00:20:23.92
helplessly, to
pretend that we are in them
00:20:24.21\00:20:26.85
and that we belong in them.
00:20:26.88\00:20:28.94
And that we are here,
and that we belong here.
00:20:28.98\00:20:33.75
I asked Jesus if I
could eat of the fruit,
00:20:34.53\00:20:38.84
but He said "No. "
00:20:39.98\00:20:41.58
"For those who eat of the fruit
of this land go back to Earth"
00:20:42.10\00:20:45.06
"no more. But soon," He said,
00:20:45.09\00:20:49.71
"if faithful, you will both,"
00:20:50.03\00:20:52.97
"eat of the fruit of
the tree of life, and drink"
00:20:53.01\00:20:56.41
"of the water of the fountain.
But now you must go back"
00:20:56.45\00:21:01.80
"and relate to others
what I have shown you. "
00:21:01.83\00:21:04.76
And then an angel
bore me gently downward
00:21:05.63\00:21:09.36
to this dark word.
00:21:10.02\00:21:13.21
Sometimes I wish I
could stand on the edge
00:21:14.29\00:21:16.37
of the universe.
00:21:16.40\00:21:18.40
And if I could, I'd get
out there and I'd shout:
00:21:18.44\00:21:21.20
"The night shift is
over, it's time to go home. "
00:21:21.45\00:21:25.47
Nobody belongs here.
00:21:28.83\00:21:31.64
I mean, it's somewhere...
00:21:33.93\00:21:35.38
...somehow...
00:21:36.87\00:21:38.96
there's a beauty to be
found in the acceptance
00:21:39.79\00:21:42.85
of the struggle.
00:21:43.56\00:21:45.72
Sometimes I think I
can bear it here no longer.
00:21:45.92\00:21:50.52
The things of Earth
are very dreary to me.
00:21:52.06\00:21:55.40
I am very lonely here,
00:21:56.11\00:21:58.79
for I have seen a better land.
00:21:59.29\00:22:02.97
Oh that I had
the wings of a dove
00:22:03.73\00:22:06.29
and then I would fly away
00:22:06.80\00:22:09.34
and be at rest.
00:22:09.78\00:22:12.30
Amen.
00:22:16.60\00:22:17.98
I think of that, and I
think it's an incredible
00:22:18.08\00:22:21.46
hope for me to know
that there's heaven.
00:22:22.06\00:22:24.79
There are times
that I look around
00:22:25.76\00:22:27.19
and most of my family are
dying and they're drug addicts
00:22:27.23\00:22:31.01
and alcoholics,
and even the people
00:22:31.04\00:22:33.44
that aren't from that kind
of background, have grandfathers
00:22:33.48\00:22:36.27
who die, I
think it's a sad thing
00:22:36.30\00:22:38.92
and to be able to know
that this is not our home,
00:22:39.03\00:22:42.49
that we have a place,
that Jesus is waiting for us,
00:22:42.61\00:22:45.81
it's just a matter of
time. Does that help anybody?
00:22:45.85\00:22:49.02
Just the feeling that
no matter how hard we try,
00:22:51.70\00:22:55.31
we are not going to
be able to fit here,
00:22:55.34\00:22:57.68
that's somewhat comforting.
00:22:57.88\00:22:59.77
To me, I think about heaven,
00:23:00.86\00:23:03.45
I look around our world,
00:23:03.75\00:23:05.02
and I see the tears, and
the pain that's suffered,
00:23:05.06\00:23:08.09
people losing loved one,
or people having chemical
00:23:08.67\00:23:11.42
imbalances that are so
hard to control and get over.
00:23:11.45\00:23:14.17
I keep thinking
about the end of the Bible
00:23:14.70\00:23:17.72
when in the last
chapters it talks about heaven,
00:23:17.84\00:23:20.31
and it talks about
what's going to happen,
00:23:20.34\00:23:22.15
and it paints
this picture of God
00:23:22.18\00:23:24.17
coming down and
touching your cheek and wiping
00:23:24.21\00:23:26.90
away every one of those
tears that you ever shed.
00:23:26.94\00:23:29.60
It is the awesomest picture
that I ever imagined in my life.
00:23:30.24\00:23:33.18
Isn't that a great thing?
00:23:33.21\00:23:34.89
That makes me feel like
I want to tell somebody,
00:23:35.20\00:23:38.26
I want to tell somebody
that even through the sadness,
00:23:38.50\00:23:41.08
that even through all
that stuff that you know what?
00:23:41.12\00:23:43.67
This is not our home, and
we have promises of joy now,
00:23:43.79\00:23:48.84
but also we have hope,
00:23:48.97\00:23:50.87
which a lot of
people don't have.
00:23:50.92\00:23:52.98
You know Jason, I
heard you sing a song that is
00:23:53.17\00:23:55.52
similar to the thing
00:23:55.55\00:23:57.81
that they just acted out for us.
00:23:57.85\00:24:00.31
Uh-huh, it's a song
that was actually taken
00:24:00.35\00:24:02.99
partly from the vision
that Jackie related to us.
00:24:03.09\00:24:07.40
I don't remember the
name of the guy that wrote it,
00:24:07.83\00:24:09.77
but it's a really good song.
00:24:10.50\00:24:11.65
Will you play it for us?
00:24:11.68\00:24:13.30
Yeah, I'd love to play it.
00:24:13.34\00:24:14.93
I want to go to heaven,
pick a never-fading flower
00:24:21.53\00:24:26.50
from the mountains overlooking
00:24:26.79\00:24:30.04
the temple of my God.
00:24:30.08\00:24:33.73
I want to go to heaven,
00:24:34.29\00:24:36.34
where all is bright and glory,
00:24:36.38\00:24:39.66
how I long to be with Jesus,
00:24:39.69\00:24:43.29
how I long to be with God.
00:24:43.33\00:24:46.90
Sometimes I think
00:24:47.13\00:24:49.38
I can stay here no longer.
00:24:49.47\00:24:52.73
I feel very lonely here
00:24:53.75\00:24:55.79
for I have seen a better land.
00:24:55.83\00:24:59.27
Oh, that I had wings like a dove
00:24:59.57\00:25:05.20
then would I fly
away and be at rest.
00:25:05.24\00:25:10.65
I want to go to heaven.
00:25:16.39\00:25:18.34
I want to hear
the voice of Jesus.
00:25:18.38\00:25:21.67
"You have washed
your robes in My blood,"
00:25:21.71\00:25:24.79
"and stood
stiffly for my truth. "
00:25:24.96\00:25:28.35
And when I get to heaven
00:25:29.17\00:25:31.27
I'll cast my
crown at Jesus' feet.
00:25:31.31\00:25:34.32
I want to praise
His name forever,
00:25:34.42\00:25:37.49
He has done so much for me.
00:25:37.73\00:25:41.46
Sometimes I think
00:25:41.84\00:25:44.26
I can't stay here any longer,
00:25:44.30\00:25:47.62
I feel very lonely here,
for I have seen a better land.
00:25:48.34\00:25:53.95
Oh, that I had wings like a dove
00:25:54.39\00:25:59.89
then would I fly away
00:25:59.92\00:26:02.75
and be at rest.
00:26:02.78\00:26:06.06
Oh, that I had wings like a dove
00:26:07.29\00:26:12.87
then would I fly away
00:26:12.90\00:26:15.85
and be at rest.
00:26:16.04\00:26:19.07
Fly away.
00:26:24.25\00:26:27.17
Wow. That's great. Beautiful.
00:26:27.50\00:26:29.30
Thank you very much for sharing
your stories about depression
00:26:29.34\00:26:33.39
and it's really
tough to share that because
00:26:33.55\00:26:36.09
it reminds us of the sadness.
00:26:36.99\00:26:39.45
It's more fun to talk
about the joy, the peace
00:26:39.50\00:26:42.24
you found in Christ,
and I know each one of us
00:26:42.27\00:26:44.98
has found that,
which is a good thing.
00:26:45.01\00:26:47.60
Please remember that no
matter what you're feeling,
00:26:48.78\00:26:51.42
no matter what you see in
this world that is painful,
00:26:51.45\00:26:54.06
is that we were
never meant to be here.
00:26:54.09\00:26:56.03
We were never meant
to experience death,
00:26:56.06\00:26:58.14
we were never meant
to lose people we love.
00:26:58.17\00:27:00.22
God says: "Just look to
me, put everything away"
00:27:01.19\00:27:03.73
"that you think you're suppose
to discover here, and just look"
00:27:03.77\00:27:06.35
"to Me and ask Me:
What is it about this world"
00:27:06.38\00:27:08.99
"that I need to know? And
what is it about the next"
00:27:09.03\00:27:11.82
"world that I need to
know in order to give me hope?"
00:27:11.85\00:27:14.61
I remember a time in my
life that I was depressed.
00:27:15.11\00:27:17.64
I got all these self-help
books, I got tones of them.
00:27:17.68\00:27:20.18
What I discovered is that
they weren't doing me any good,
00:27:20.23\00:27:23.57
and the only good I ever got
was if I turned it over to God
00:27:23.60\00:27:26.91
and said: "Please, give
me hope, take this away. "
00:27:26.94\00:27:29.78
And He did.
00:27:29.81\00:27:31.21
I'd like to end with
Psalms 30:5 and it says,
00:27:31.25\00:27:34.72
remember one thing, that
00:27:34.84\00:27:37.37
"weeping may remain for a
night, but rejoicing comes
00:27:37.41\00:27:40.10
in the morning." So remember,
joy comes in the morning.
00:27:40.20\00:27:43.03
Thanks for joining
us on Teen Pathways,
00:27:43.06\00:27:44.62
and we'll see you next
time. [Music for Credits]
00:27:44.66\00:27:48.13