The following program
discusses sensitive issues.
00:00:01.36\00:00:03.03
Parents are
cautioned that some material
00:00:03.06\00:00:04.87
may be too candid
for younger children.
00:00:04.90\00:00:10.17
Welcome to The New Journey,
00:00:10.21\00:00:11.54
a program where
you'll meet real life people,
00:00:11.57\00:00:13.58
with real life testimonies,
00:00:13.61\00:00:14.94
doing real life
ministry for Jesus Christ.
00:00:14.98\00:00:17.05
I'm your host Aaron Chancy,
00:00:17.08\00:00:18.45
come join us on The New Journey.
00:00:18.48\00:00:20.22
Well come back
to The New Journey.
00:00:51.75\00:00:53.42
On today's broadcast with
us, we have DaMarrus Miller.
00:00:53.45\00:00:56.12
DaMarrus, we like to thank
you for being on the program.
00:00:56.15\00:00:58.19
Thank you for having me.
All right, I appreciate it.
00:00:58.22\00:00:59.85
Just some general information
if you can provide us
00:00:59.89\00:01:01.72
with your age and
where you're from?
00:01:01.76\00:01:03.66
I am 34 years old. Okay.
00:01:03.69\00:01:05.99
I'm from
Springfield, Massachusetts.
00:01:06.03\00:01:08.23
You didn't ask me but
I just want to tell you,
00:01:08.26\00:01:10.13
I love the Boston Red
Sox, I love the Boston Celtics,
00:01:10.17\00:01:13.80
I'm a New England Patriots fans,
00:01:13.84\00:01:15.30
I even like Boston
Bruins, that's where I'm from.
00:01:15.34\00:01:16.67
Hmm, wow.
Massachusetts all the way.
00:01:16.71\00:01:18.97
All the way. Okay.
00:01:19.01\00:01:21.04
If you could describe
for us your early home life,
00:01:21.08\00:01:23.28
what it was like
growing up in your home?
00:01:23.31\00:01:25.55
For me I must be
honest, my early home life
00:01:25.58\00:01:28.55
was like the Huxtables.
00:01:28.58\00:01:29.92
Okay, okay. What
do you mean that?
00:01:29.95\00:01:31.29
My dad was
there, my mom was there.
00:01:31.32\00:01:32.89
I had two older brothers,
very close knit family,
00:01:32.92\00:01:36.26
we did a lot of things together.
00:01:36.29\00:01:38.29
My father is really
strong and strict on education,
00:01:38.33\00:01:41.06
as well as Christian values.
00:01:41.10\00:01:43.00
My mother was very motherly,
00:01:43.03\00:01:45.37
even though she
dealt with boys and,
00:01:45.40\00:01:46.74
you know, the
only woman in a house,
00:01:46.77\00:01:48.54
she was strong,
but she was still sweet
00:01:48.57\00:01:50.74
and she was still
very motherly in nature
00:01:50.77\00:01:53.21
nurturing to us boys,
00:01:53.24\00:01:54.78
so we had a very
good Christian foundation
00:01:54.81\00:01:56.61
growing up.
00:01:56.64\00:01:57.98
Okay, so did you grow up
00:01:58.01\00:01:59.35
in the
Seventh-day Adventist church
00:01:59.38\00:02:00.72
or another denomination?
00:02:00.75\00:02:02.08
Born and raised
00:02:02.12\00:02:03.45
in the
Seventh-day Adventist church.
00:02:03.49\00:02:04.82
And my mom was a new
convert when she met my father.
00:02:04.85\00:02:06.55
Okay.
00:02:06.59\00:02:07.92
But we were raised
Seventh-day Adventist,
00:02:07.96\00:02:10.03
I mean busy bee,
adventurous, pathfinders,
00:02:10.06\00:02:13.53
I mean we were...
00:02:13.56\00:02:14.90
I am all the way Adventist.
00:02:14.93\00:02:16.26
Okay, okay.
00:02:16.30\00:02:17.63
What were some of
the positive influences
00:02:17.67\00:02:19.13
growing up in your life?
00:02:19.17\00:02:20.50
I will be honest,
00:02:20.54\00:02:21.87
one of the most
positive influences for me
00:02:21.90\00:02:23.54
was my father.
00:02:23.57\00:02:24.97
Okay.
00:02:25.01\00:02:26.34
My father was a superman,
man, he is a super dad.
00:02:26.37\00:02:28.64
I have so much respect
even to this day for him.
00:02:28.68\00:02:32.91
His father wasn't there for
him and the one thing he said
00:02:32.95\00:02:35.22
he would do is
make sure his boys
00:02:35.25\00:02:37.15
grew up with their dad.
00:02:37.19\00:02:38.65
And so he did everything,
00:02:38.69\00:02:40.46
he was our coach for all sports,
00:02:40.49\00:02:43.09
he was our pathfinder
director, our choir leader,
00:02:43.12\00:02:45.63
I mean he made sure that
Sabbath wasn't issue for us
00:02:45.66\00:02:49.20
and because of
that he would be in
00:02:49.23\00:02:50.57
different leadership
positions to make sure
00:02:50.60\00:02:53.40
that his boys can have a
life without having any issues,
00:02:53.44\00:02:57.44
did with the
Sabbath and stuff like that,
00:02:57.47\00:02:58.87
so I played AAU ball,
I played summer leagues,
00:02:58.91\00:03:01.41
I played church leagues,
00:03:01.44\00:03:02.78
I mean I did a lot of things
00:03:02.81\00:03:04.15
and my father made sure that
00:03:04.18\00:03:06.18
he would be a part of
it as a leader for him
00:03:06.21\00:03:07.98
to make sure that we gonna have.
00:03:08.02\00:03:09.88
Praise the
Lord. Praise the Lord.
00:03:09.92\00:03:11.32
How much of an
impact do you think it was,
00:03:11.35\00:03:13.15
how important it is do you think
00:03:13.19\00:03:14.99
to have a father in the home,
00:03:15.02\00:03:16.59
because, you know,
there are some fathers,
00:03:16.62\00:03:19.06
they have children
and they leave the home,
00:03:19.09\00:03:22.26
but, and we live in a
society where that happens,
00:03:22.30\00:03:24.77
it's recurring
constantly, and you know,
00:03:24.80\00:03:28.07
it needs to be
some encouragement
00:03:28.10\00:03:29.70
for the fathers to stay home.
00:03:29.74\00:03:31.51
Why do you think
it's so important
00:03:31.54\00:03:33.07
for the father
to be in the home,
00:03:33.11\00:03:34.91
whether he has sons or
whether he has daughters?
00:03:34.94\00:03:37.98
For me and I can
only speak as a son,
00:03:38.01\00:03:40.42
not a daughter, but for me,
00:03:40.45\00:03:42.78
I would be
nothing without my father.
00:03:42.82\00:03:44.32
Okay, wow.
00:03:44.35\00:03:45.69
Literally he not only
told me the right things
00:03:45.72\00:03:49.29
and the wrong
things but he told me
00:03:49.32\00:03:50.66
why not to do and
why to do those things.
00:03:50.69\00:03:53.50
I can remember early in
my life at two and three,
00:03:53.53\00:03:56.56
my dad will just
pick me up and say,
00:03:56.60\00:03:58.77
you're a man, you're man of God.
00:03:58.80\00:04:00.54
He poured in so many different
nuggets and jewels in our life
00:04:00.57\00:04:04.11
as young men, as young black men
00:04:04.14\00:04:06.07
as well that you're not
gonna carry yourself anyway.
00:04:06.11\00:04:08.68
You're miller, but
not only you're miller,
00:04:08.71\00:04:10.51
you're a man of God.
00:04:10.55\00:04:11.88
So at early age, man, he
said you walk a certain way,
00:04:11.91\00:04:14.25
you talk a certain way,
you treat women a certain way.
00:04:14.28\00:04:16.69
You just treat your
community a certain way,
00:04:16.72\00:04:19.29
and so I can honestly
say without my father,
00:04:19.32\00:04:22.66
and of course my
mother but for me,
00:04:22.69\00:04:24.83
I was a daddy's boy.
00:04:24.86\00:04:26.19
I'm the youngest.
00:04:26.23\00:04:27.56
People say the baby,
00:04:27.60\00:04:28.93
I just say the youngest of them.
00:04:28.96\00:04:30.87
Where my father
was, that's where I was.
00:04:30.90\00:04:32.73
I was on his hip and
he would take me places
00:04:32.77\00:04:35.60
and introduced me to people
00:04:35.64\00:04:37.27
and everywhere I
went people spoke
00:04:37.31\00:04:38.64
so highly of my
dad, that's one thing
00:04:38.67\00:04:40.28
I want the
people to speak of me.
00:04:40.31\00:04:42.21
I wanted people to
say, man, I like that guy,
00:04:42.24\00:04:44.75
I don't know him
but I like him...
00:04:44.78\00:04:46.11
I like him. Amen.
00:04:46.15\00:04:47.48
I mean, that's
something my father did for me,
00:04:47.52\00:04:48.85
it's intangible.
00:04:48.88\00:04:50.59
Now you had a father in a home
00:04:50.62\00:04:51.95
just like I had
a father in a home,
00:04:51.99\00:04:53.96
but for those don't...
00:04:53.99\00:04:55.32
those don't have
a father in a home,
00:04:55.36\00:04:56.69
how do you think it affects them
00:04:56.73\00:04:58.26
in their view of God
00:04:58.29\00:04:59.63
being that God is to
be our heavenly father.
00:04:59.66\00:05:01.86
How do you think
they are affected by that?
00:05:01.90\00:05:03.70
I think each person is
affected differently based off
00:05:03.73\00:05:07.04
their own experience,
based off their own upbringing.
00:05:07.07\00:05:10.34
I might have some
family members and friends
00:05:10.37\00:05:12.14
who don't have a
father in their lives
00:05:12.17\00:05:14.28
and they understand
the importance of God,
00:05:14.31\00:05:16.34
the Father...
00:05:16.38\00:05:17.71
Okay.
00:05:17.75\00:05:19.08
So I think it just depends on
00:05:19.11\00:05:20.45
that person's
experience in life...
00:05:20.48\00:05:22.48
Okay, okay.
00:05:22.52\00:05:23.85
Cultural, you
know, their upbringing
00:05:23.89\00:05:25.92
on how they view God the Father.
00:05:25.95\00:05:27.76
Okay, okay. You know.
00:05:27.79\00:05:29.22
Definitely, definitely.
00:05:29.26\00:05:30.59
What do you think, you mentioned
00:05:30.63\00:05:31.96
some of the positive influences
in your life being your father,
00:05:31.99\00:05:34.06
what were some of the
negative influences in your life
00:05:34.10\00:05:36.26
you think?
00:05:36.30\00:05:37.63
I must be honest
with you and for me...
00:05:37.67\00:05:39.17
Okay.
00:05:39.20\00:05:41.00
It was myself...
00:05:41.04\00:05:42.37
Okay, wow.
00:05:42.40\00:05:43.74
My mind...
00:05:43.77\00:05:45.11
I was the kid that
had a vivid imagination
00:05:45.14\00:05:48.54
where I would be one place
00:05:48.58\00:05:50.68
but my mind will be
somewhere totally different.
00:05:50.71\00:05:53.48
I was a kid that
was always in the crowd
00:05:53.52\00:05:55.22
but always felt alone.
00:05:55.25\00:05:56.79
So for me, I yearned
00:05:56.82\00:05:58.22
and had desire
for the street life.
00:05:58.25\00:06:01.56
Okay, okay.
00:06:01.59\00:06:02.92
It was always close to me.
00:06:02.96\00:06:04.29
We were raised in the
projects but I didn't know it.
00:06:04.33\00:06:05.66
Yeah.
00:06:05.69\00:06:07.03
One of those situations,
it was always close to me,
00:06:07.06\00:06:09.26
always at my reach,
but I can never get to it.
00:06:09.30\00:06:11.97
And so, in my
mind, I began to yearn,
00:06:12.00\00:06:14.74
I began to imagine how
would be to be a gangster.
00:06:14.77\00:06:19.17
So, I'm probably one of the guys
00:06:19.21\00:06:20.54
you'll call a veggie thug.
00:06:20.58\00:06:21.94
But not veggie thug as it
00:06:21.98\00:06:23.31
I'm a punk but
veggie thug as in,
00:06:23.35\00:06:24.78
I was close to the
thugs but I wasn't the thug.
00:06:24.81\00:06:27.32
Okay.
00:06:27.35\00:06:28.68
So my family
members, my mom and dad saw,
00:06:28.72\00:06:30.69
you know, they were
killers but I wasn't a killer.
00:06:30.72\00:06:33.39
You know, but I went
and spend time with my mom,
00:06:33.42\00:06:35.26
you know, my church
was right in the hood,
00:06:35.29\00:06:37.63
Shiloh Seventh-Day
Adventist Church in Springfield
00:06:37.66\00:06:40.43
where we reached
out to the community
00:06:40.46\00:06:42.86
a lot of drug
dealers would come and pray,
00:06:42.90\00:06:44.80
we had a gym in our church,
00:06:44.83\00:06:46.17
and, you know, it's
very rare to find that
00:06:46.20\00:06:48.27
but we had a full
core gym in our church
00:06:48.30\00:06:50.74
and we would open
up to the community,
00:06:50.77\00:06:52.27
and there was so many gangsters
00:06:52.31\00:06:53.81
and so many drug guys will
come and play basketball in.
00:06:53.84\00:06:57.95
As a young kid, my
father would open a gym for them
00:06:57.98\00:06:59.95
and I would just watch them.
00:06:59.98\00:07:01.88
I watched the guy coming
in drunk to play basketball.
00:07:01.92\00:07:04.15
Okay.
00:07:04.19\00:07:05.52
I watched the guy
smelling like smoking marijuana
00:07:05.55\00:07:08.02
coming and playing ball,
00:07:08.06\00:07:09.39
and I begin to imitate
those things in my mind.
00:07:09.42\00:07:12.26
Yeah. Wow.
00:07:12.29\00:07:13.63
And so, sometimes I
would pretend to be high
00:07:13.66\00:07:15.00
when I wasn't.
00:07:15.03\00:07:16.36
Yeah. Wow.
00:07:16.40\00:07:17.73
That my eyes all,
you know, squinched in,
00:07:17.77\00:07:19.10
you know,
talking on, but I wasn't.
00:07:19.13\00:07:20.47
Yeah.
00:07:20.50\00:07:21.84
And so for me, my
greatest enemy was myself,
00:07:21.87\00:07:23.61
was my mind.
00:07:23.64\00:07:25.21
Yeah, okay. Now did
you see those things?
00:07:25.24\00:07:26.57
Did you view the smoking,
the drinking as being cool?
00:07:26.61\00:07:31.95
See, there is a
difference between being cool
00:07:31.98\00:07:35.15
in a way of life.
00:07:35.18\00:07:36.52
Okay. That was
just the way of life.
00:07:36.55\00:07:37.95
Yeah. You drink, you smoke.
00:07:37.99\00:07:39.89
You know that's
just what you did
00:07:39.92\00:07:41.96
and so my community,
00:07:41.99\00:07:43.32
my environment
outside of my house.
00:07:43.36\00:07:45.16
Family on my mother
side and father side,
00:07:45.19\00:07:46.80
that's what they did.
00:07:46.83\00:07:48.16
So family reunions, just
going over cousin's house to eat
00:07:48.20\00:07:52.33
and stuff like that,
you saw different things.
00:07:52.37\00:07:54.40
Okay.
00:07:54.44\00:07:55.77
That for me was intriguing.
00:07:55.80\00:07:57.14
Yeah. Wow, wow.
00:07:57.17\00:07:58.51
So you eventually got
involved in drinking, smoking,
00:07:58.54\00:08:00.31
drugs or whatever.
00:08:00.34\00:08:01.68
At what age did you start
00:08:01.71\00:08:03.38
that as well as what
were some of the narcotics
00:08:03.41\00:08:05.81
that you got involved with?
00:08:05.85\00:08:07.18
For me, um...
00:08:07.22\00:08:08.62
I can remember this
like it was yesterday.
00:08:08.65\00:08:10.79
Six grade I graduated
from the Dare program.
00:08:10.82\00:08:12.99
Okay. I came home.
00:08:13.02\00:08:14.82
But you're talking about
the Dare to Say, No to Drugs.
00:08:14.86\00:08:16.22
Dare to Say...
00:08:16.26\00:08:17.59
Okay. Yeah.
00:08:17.63\00:08:18.96
I graduate from
the Dare program,
00:08:18.99\00:08:20.33
came home that evening
00:08:20.36\00:08:21.90
and I've seen one
of my close relatives,
00:08:21.93\00:08:26.33
sibling of mine...
00:08:26.37\00:08:27.70
Okay. My brother
was smoking weed.
00:08:27.74\00:08:30.57
Okay.
00:08:30.61\00:08:31.94
I caught him, I
couldn't believe it.
00:08:31.97\00:08:33.31
I said, you gonna
die, don't you know,
00:08:33.34\00:08:35.08
I just graduated
from the Dare program.
00:08:35.11\00:08:36.95
What you're doing?
00:08:36.98\00:08:38.31
And so, he begin
to tell me, he said,
00:08:38.35\00:08:41.22
who do you know ever
died of smoking weed.
00:08:41.25\00:08:42.85
Yeah, wow.
00:08:42.88\00:08:44.22
At that time, Aaron, I
didn't know anybody who died.
00:08:44.25\00:08:45.82
You know I was in sixth grade.
00:08:45.85\00:08:48.92
And I begin to think, I
don't really know anybody.
00:08:48.96\00:08:51.49
the Dare program
taught me that tobacco use
00:08:51.53\00:08:54.26
is lung cancer.
00:08:54.30\00:08:55.63
Yeah, would cause cancer.
00:08:55.66\00:08:57.00
And cigarettes
would cause lung cancer,
00:08:57.03\00:08:58.47
but marijuana, I didn't
really hear too much about it.
00:08:58.50\00:09:00.64
Okay.
00:09:00.67\00:09:02.00
So, I remembered my
brother saying, listen, man,
00:09:02.04\00:09:04.44
don't go tell mom and
dad, but think about it,
00:09:04.47\00:09:07.28
who do you know
died of smoking weed.
00:09:07.31\00:09:09.18
Yeah.
00:09:09.21\00:09:10.55
My brother even went to say,
it's from the herb, you know.
00:09:10.58\00:09:11.95
Wow, wow.
00:09:11.98\00:09:13.82
And so, it's what we grow here.
00:09:13.85\00:09:15.18
And at sixth,
sixth, in sixth grade
00:09:15.22\00:09:17.49
that my mind began to turn.
00:09:17.52\00:09:18.85
Okay.
00:09:18.89\00:09:20.22
Seventh grade had a best friend,
00:09:20.26\00:09:22.39
his name is Master Mercy.
00:09:22.42\00:09:24.33
First name
Master, last name Mercy.
00:09:24.36\00:09:27.13
That was his real
name or nick name?
00:09:27.16\00:09:28.50
Real name.
00:09:28.53\00:09:29.86
Government name,
Master last name Mercy.
00:09:29.90\00:09:32.90
Wow.
00:09:32.93\00:09:34.27
Seventh grade I
remember like it was yesterday,
00:09:34.30\00:09:35.64
we were in recess,
Phillie Blunts was just out...
00:09:35.67\00:09:39.44
Okay, okay.
00:09:39.47\00:09:40.81
And it was like,
we gonna get high.
00:09:40.84\00:09:42.24
Recess now, even though I
know something is wrong, recess.
00:09:42.28\00:09:44.45
Yeah, you smoking in recess.
00:09:44.48\00:09:45.81
In recess, brother, you know.
00:09:45.85\00:09:47.25
And so we went to
the corner of the field
00:09:47.28\00:09:48.85
and he began to
roll up the Phillie Blunt
00:09:48.88\00:09:51.35
and he messed it up,
00:09:51.39\00:09:52.95
I mean it was just tear
holes into it, broken up,
00:09:52.99\00:09:56.09
and so being
determined person that I am,
00:09:56.12\00:09:58.96
I said that can't stop
us, we gonna get high at that.
00:09:58.99\00:10:01.93
Wow. Run to bathroom.
00:10:01.96\00:10:03.50
I remember, even
the teaches said,
00:10:03.53\00:10:04.87
"Why you comes to the bathroom?
00:10:04.90\00:10:06.23
You know, it's recess."
00:10:06.27\00:10:07.60
I said, "I got to
use the bathroom."
00:10:07.64\00:10:08.97
And you know, we only
got a brown paper towel.
00:10:09.00\00:10:10.57
You know, it look
like the Phillie Blunt.
00:10:10.61\00:10:12.24
Yeah, yeah.
00:10:12.27\00:10:13.61
And we roll that
thing. It was about this long.
00:10:13.64\00:10:18.05
And I remember
like it was yesterday.
00:10:18.08\00:10:20.08
The first hit I
took I almost died.
00:10:20.12\00:10:23.69
I felt like my
lungs came out my mouth,
00:10:23.72\00:10:25.49
I was just coughing
up, and my boy was like,
00:10:25.52\00:10:27.32
"Man, this is a good stuff."
00:10:27.36\00:10:29.22
Little did I know I was smoking
all those fumes out of there.
00:10:29.26\00:10:32.36
Out of paper towel.
00:10:32.39\00:10:34.56
And I had a bad experience,
but I made in my heart
00:10:34.60\00:10:38.73
that I'll have a good
experience with the weed.
00:10:38.77\00:10:40.10
Okay.
00:10:40.14\00:10:41.47
And so after
that, that first time
00:10:41.50\00:10:44.57
may be twice a week
in recess we'll smoke.
00:10:44.61\00:10:48.04
Wow.
00:10:48.08\00:10:49.41
Began to smoke so much,
00:10:49.44\00:10:51.38
you couldn't
tell that I was high.
00:10:51.41\00:10:52.75
Yeah, okay. I was active smoker.
00:10:52.78\00:10:56.25
That was seventh grade,
eight grade, ninth grade,
00:10:56.28\00:10:58.52
tenth grade, active smoker.
00:10:58.55\00:11:00.79
I was so good with
it, I always had cologne.
00:11:00.82\00:11:04.59
Okay.
00:11:04.63\00:11:05.96
I used to brush my lips.
00:11:05.99\00:11:07.33
You know why I brush my lips?
00:11:07.36\00:11:08.70
Because, I'm a fair skin brother
00:11:08.73\00:11:10.17
and you know, black lips,
00:11:10.20\00:11:11.53
that tells you that
you've been smoking.
00:11:11.57\00:11:12.97
So I would brush my lips.
00:11:13.00\00:11:14.34
I always kept Visine.
Just about to say that.
00:11:14.37\00:11:16.47
And so I was moving in ways
00:11:16.50\00:11:18.97
that I could be an active smoker
00:11:19.01\00:11:20.51
and still keep up with my life.
00:11:20.54\00:11:22.18
I play
basketball, I was into sports.
00:11:22.21\00:11:24.45
Some of my "best
games" I was high.
00:11:24.48\00:11:28.38
I scored 32 points in one game
00:11:28.42\00:11:32.12
and I was so high in that game.
00:11:32.15\00:11:34.72
I mean, I was doing
stuff I never thought of it.
00:11:34.76\00:11:36.96
All my friends like,
"Man, you doing so good."
00:11:36.99\00:11:39.83
But they don't
know I was smoking,
00:11:39.86\00:11:41.20
because all my
friends known I was in church.
00:11:41.23\00:11:43.57
And so they protect me
from some of the things
00:11:43.60\00:11:46.00
that they were doing, so
I had to smoke by myself.
00:11:46.03\00:11:48.57
So I create a habit,
00:11:48.60\00:11:49.94
after smoking with Master Mercy,
00:11:49.97\00:11:51.31
I created a habit that
I only smoke with myself
00:11:51.34\00:11:53.14
because I didn't want
people to really know.
00:11:53.17\00:11:54.98
So I wanted, I
wanted the feeling of it,
00:11:55.01\00:11:57.45
I wanted the craving
of it, I wanted to be down
00:11:57.48\00:12:01.38
but I didn't
want nobody to know.
00:12:01.42\00:12:02.75
Yeah, Okay. Okay.
00:12:02.78\00:12:04.12
And so I...
00:12:04.15\00:12:05.49
you remember the game,
on the river, on the bank?
00:12:05.52\00:12:06.86
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
00:12:06.89\00:12:08.22
I was on the
river, I was on the bank.
00:12:08.26\00:12:10.56
That's the way I lived.
00:12:10.59\00:12:12.09
And so that was my
first start in narcotics
00:12:12.13\00:12:16.20
and drugs and marijuana.
00:12:16.23\00:12:17.57
Okay.
00:12:17.60\00:12:18.93
Now, you eventually got
involved in selling narcotics.
00:12:18.97\00:12:21.37
That's correct.
00:12:21.40\00:12:22.74
What led you to
get involve in selling
00:12:22.77\00:12:24.44
as well as what
were you selling?
00:12:24.47\00:12:26.57
Master Mercy. Okay.
00:12:26.61\00:12:29.01
Best friend. Choose
your friends wisely.
00:12:29.04\00:12:31.61
Amen. Amen.
00:12:31.65\00:12:32.98
Master mercy came to
school in ninth grade
00:12:33.01\00:12:36.58
with a wad this thick.
00:12:36.62\00:12:37.95
Okay. Of money?
00:12:37.99\00:12:39.32
Of money. Okay.
00:12:39.35\00:12:40.69
The first time in my
life I seen $100 bills.
00:12:40.72\00:12:42.06
Wow.
00:12:42.09\00:12:43.43
My dad never
showed me $100 bills.
00:12:43.46\00:12:44.79
I've never seen a
$100 bill in real life.
00:12:44.83\00:12:48.83
And so I was just captivated,
I was just like, dude,
00:12:48.86\00:12:52.03
"What are you doing?"
00:12:52.07\00:12:53.84
And he began to tell me
how he would sell drugs.
00:12:53.87\00:12:57.24
And during that
time in the early '90s
00:12:57.27\00:13:00.98
it was all
right to be on blocks.
00:13:01.01\00:13:02.98
We used to stand up on a blocks
and you be there all night.
00:13:03.01\00:13:05.78
And you sell dope, you
sell weed, you sell crack,
00:13:05.81\00:13:07.98
whatever you sell all night.
00:13:08.02\00:13:09.35
I mean, cops knew
what you were doing,
00:13:09.38\00:13:10.72
that was your block,
you protected your block.
00:13:10.75\00:13:12.95
Your got certain
drugs on your block.
00:13:12.99\00:13:14.42
And he began to tell me those
things and I was just like,
00:13:14.46\00:13:16.42
"Man, I want to do it,
00:13:16.46\00:13:18.09
but my mom's not going
to allow me to stay out
00:13:18.13\00:13:21.33
past the lights."
00:13:21.36\00:13:22.70
You know, when the lights
come on, I go tot go inside.
00:13:22.73\00:13:24.17
Yeah, definitely.
00:13:24.20\00:13:25.53
And so I always
had that in my mind
00:13:25.57\00:13:27.34
that I wanted to sell weed.
00:13:27.37\00:13:29.77
Twenty one, moved out the house,
00:13:29.80\00:13:33.17
experience some
things in my life.
00:13:33.21\00:13:34.94
Friend came into my life,
00:13:34.98\00:13:36.31
it was like, man, you
know, you're a good guy,
00:13:36.34\00:13:39.65
man, you should sell weed.
00:13:39.68\00:13:41.02
That was interesting, all
the bad things that I did,
00:13:41.05\00:13:42.95
they came to me say,
"Because, you're a good guy.
00:13:42.98\00:13:44.69
you should do this."
00:13:44.72\00:13:46.25
Kind of go figure and... Wow.
00:13:46.29\00:13:47.89
So I started to sell weed,
I sold weed for about a week.
00:13:47.92\00:13:50.66
And you know what happened,
00:13:50.69\00:13:52.36
when you smoke
more than you sell...
00:13:52.39\00:13:54.93
You going to make nothing.
00:13:54.96\00:13:56.30
Not going to make nothing.
00:13:56.33\00:13:57.67
But enemies and beat.
00:13:57.70\00:13:59.03
Luckily it was my
cousin who was providing,
00:13:59.07\00:14:00.40
he kind of understood,
00:14:00.44\00:14:01.77
well he said,
this is not for you.
00:14:01.80\00:14:03.14
Okay.
00:14:03.17\00:14:04.51
So I dealt with that for a week.
00:14:04.54\00:14:05.87
Like I said, I
smoked up most of my,
00:14:05.91\00:14:07.24
I think I have five
bags, smoked four of them so...
00:14:07.28\00:14:10.48
You didn't make
anything from it.
00:14:10.51\00:14:11.85
Didn't make no money at all.
00:14:11.88\00:14:13.78
And so that was in my
early 20s and then about 24,
00:14:13.82\00:14:18.59
I met up with another gentleman.
00:14:18.62\00:14:20.79
I'll leave his name out.
00:14:20.82\00:14:23.06
And he knew I was in church.
00:14:23.09\00:14:26.23
Matter of fact, we
will party on Friday nights
00:14:26.26\00:14:28.70
and he would say,
00:14:28.73\00:14:30.10
"You got to be home back
2:00 because you gonna...
00:14:30.13\00:14:32.20
you have to be at
church on Sabbath."
00:14:32.23\00:14:34.07
They always knew
what I was doing,
00:14:34.10\00:14:35.50
I told you, I was in the river,
on the bank at the same time.
00:14:35.54\00:14:39.37
All the my friends knew,
00:14:39.41\00:14:40.74
everybody knew
that was what I...
00:14:40.78\00:14:42.11
who I was.
00:14:42.14\00:14:43.48
And so, he came to me
one day and he was just like,
00:14:43.51\00:14:46.45
"You know, you got suits,
right, when you go to church?"
00:14:46.48\00:14:49.38
I said, "Yeah."
00:14:49.42\00:14:51.02
"I need you to do me a favor."
00:14:51.05\00:14:52.69
I said,
"What's... what do you need?"
00:14:52.72\00:14:54.19
He said, "Well, you know,
I'm moving cooperate now."
00:14:54.22\00:14:59.36
"What do you
mean, moving corporate?"
00:14:59.39\00:15:01.33
He said, "You know, I
sell coat to the lawyers
00:15:01.36\00:15:04.73
and to the bankers now."
00:15:04.77\00:15:06.10
You know, he
said, "I sell to them
00:15:06.13\00:15:07.67
because they have
more to lose than I do.
00:15:07.70\00:15:10.31
So get careful in what they do."
00:15:10.34\00:15:11.67
Oh, yeah.
00:15:11.71\00:15:13.04
And so, Aaron, light
bulb went off my head
00:15:13.07\00:15:14.58
that I can be now a
real thug with a suit,
00:15:14.61\00:15:19.05
because that
was in my lifestyle.
00:15:19.08\00:15:21.22
Wasn't going to be...
00:15:21.25\00:15:22.58
I didn't want to carry
no guns, I didn't want to...
00:15:22.62\00:15:24.29
I was too scary for that stuff.
00:15:24.32\00:15:25.95
But I can walk up in a Bank
of America with this suit on.
00:15:25.99\00:15:29.12
Briefcase, switch out,
00:15:29.16\00:15:31.16
act like I'm doing
an account and move out.
00:15:31.19\00:15:33.93
I got so good that
security guards would know me
00:15:33.96\00:15:36.33
and just buzz me up.
00:15:36.36\00:15:38.50
I began move a lot
of weight like that
00:15:38.53\00:15:41.70
until one day, my friend...
00:15:41.74\00:15:44.37
it was too much
just for me to move it.
00:15:44.41\00:15:46.14
He said that he was
going to do run for me.
00:15:46.17\00:15:48.71
Okay.
00:15:48.74\00:15:50.15
And he's dead
00:15:50.18\00:15:55.12
and my boy that was
with him is paralyzed.
00:15:55.15\00:15:57.42
Wow.
00:15:57.45\00:15:58.79
And so when I look back at it,
Aaron, I really see how God...
00:15:58.82\00:16:03.56
Intervened in
that. Intervened in that.
00:16:03.59\00:16:05.23
I wanted to go.
00:16:05.26\00:16:07.10
Matter of fact, I was mad
because that was going to...
00:16:07.13\00:16:10.17
I would made like
$6,000 just on, just moving it.
00:16:10.20\00:16:14.14
I dint touch
nothing, I didn't cut nothing,
00:16:14.17\00:16:16.10
just handing it to one person,
that was going to be six,
00:16:16.14\00:16:19.47
but that was too
much for me, you know.
00:16:19.51\00:16:21.61
So, matter of fact, I
remember briefing with the guy,
00:16:21.64\00:16:23.95
I was like, "Man,
you don't trust me?
00:16:23.98\00:16:25.31
What you trying
to say?" you know.
00:16:25.35\00:16:26.68
I've been doing
all this work for you,
00:16:26.72\00:16:28.05
now on the
bigger one you wanna...
00:16:28.08\00:16:29.88
you know, so things went
wrong and lost one friend
00:16:29.92\00:16:34.69
and the other one is paralyzed.
00:16:34.72\00:16:36.89
And when I look
at that I just...
00:16:36.93\00:16:39.43
I'm sad, but I'm so happy
00:16:39.46\00:16:42.93
because if it weren't
for His grace, His mercy.
00:16:42.96\00:16:45.33
Amen.
00:16:45.37\00:16:46.70
And it chokes me up
because we're all friends, man.
00:16:46.74\00:16:50.64
You know, these are
good guy just got caught up.
00:16:50.67\00:16:53.48
You know, one, the
friend that's paralyzed,
00:16:53.51\00:16:56.51
he had a mentally ill
brother that he took care of.
00:16:56.54\00:16:59.95
I paid his mom's bills.
00:16:59.98\00:17:01.32
It wasn't just to
flash, it wasn't for the bling,
00:17:01.35\00:17:04.12
it was almost
selling for a cause.
00:17:04.15\00:17:06.86
And so in my mind it wasn't,
you know, these are good guy,
00:17:06.89\00:17:10.29
you know, that just
caught up in that fast money.
00:17:10.33\00:17:12.76
And so one again, like I said,
my heart goes up, my heart sad,
00:17:12.79\00:17:15.76
but I'm so happy that
God's grace and mercy kept me.
00:17:15.80\00:17:20.40
Defiantly.
00:17:20.44\00:17:21.77
How much of the impact
do you think that music,
00:17:21.80\00:17:24.97
hip-hop music
had upon your life?
00:17:25.01\00:17:26.94
Because, you
know, for many of us
00:17:26.98\00:17:28.98
that's' where a
lot of it starts.
00:17:29.01\00:17:30.35
You know,
listening to the music,
00:17:30.38\00:17:31.71
as you stated it a second ago,
00:17:31.75\00:17:33.08
you saw your friend
with that wad of money.
00:17:33.11\00:17:34.55
And it's like, you know,
00:17:34.58\00:17:35.92
we know that God
enters into the heart
00:17:35.95\00:17:37.59
while Satan, he just
breaks down to five senses.
00:17:37.62\00:17:40.39
And it seems like
everything we see,
00:17:40.42\00:17:42.09
everything we do has either
00:17:42.12\00:17:44.03
negative or
positive effect upon us.
00:17:44.06\00:17:46.16
So how much of an
impact do you think
00:17:46.19\00:17:47.90
hip-hop music played your like.
00:17:47.93\00:17:50.17
Aaron, I must be
honest with you, once again,
00:17:50.20\00:17:51.87
I'm probably
little different than most
00:17:51.90\00:17:54.94
typical African-American males.
00:17:54.97\00:17:56.34
My fellow brothers
would, they would get a...
00:17:56.37\00:17:58.87
they would pick on me.
00:17:58.91\00:18:00.28
I like the R and
B, I dint like crap.
00:18:00.31\00:18:01.64
Okay.
00:18:01.68\00:18:03.41
I'd like the soft rock.
00:18:03.45\00:18:04.91
Okay. Okay.
00:18:04.95\00:18:06.28
You know.
00:18:06.31\00:18:07.65
I see you
smiling, don't judge me.
00:18:07.68\00:18:09.25
Okay, that's all right.
00:18:09.28\00:18:10.62
But these are the
things that I like.
00:18:10.65\00:18:11.99
But that type of music
made me want to be a lover man.
00:18:12.02\00:18:16.76
Made me want to
have a lot women.
00:18:16.79\00:18:19.56
I was listening to R.
Kelly, my mind's telling me,
00:18:19.59\00:18:22.00
you know, my body
is telling me yes.
00:18:22.03\00:18:24.77
You know, I was
listening to H-Town's
00:18:24.80\00:18:26.17
"Somebody Knocking The Boots.".
00:18:26.20\00:18:27.67
I know.
00:18:27.70\00:18:29.04
I was listening to Jodeci.
00:18:29.07\00:18:30.44
You know, and I was
engulfed in R and B, man,
00:18:30.47\00:18:33.68
I wanted to be the lover man.
00:18:33.71\00:18:35.74
At that time
00:18:35.78\00:18:38.88
fair skins
brothers where in style,
00:18:38.91\00:18:41.98
you know.
00:18:42.02\00:18:43.35
So I was getting
all types of attention
00:18:43.39\00:18:45.09
with that from that female
00:18:45.12\00:18:46.89
as well as I move smooth
00:18:46.92\00:18:49.72
because I'm not rough around
the edges, I wasn't gangster.
00:18:49.76\00:18:52.56
Now I listen to some rap
Nas, and Biggie and Tupac.
00:18:52.59\00:18:56.26
But for me, it was R and B.
00:18:56.30\00:18:58.73
And for me, it was, I wanted
to be the smooth operator.
00:18:58.77\00:19:03.37
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay.
00:19:03.41\00:19:05.21
Looking back over your life,
00:19:05.24\00:19:07.01
how have seen the
hand of God in your life,
00:19:07.04\00:19:09.14
just protecting
different things,
00:19:09.18\00:19:10.98
where one thing could happen,
00:19:11.01\00:19:12.35
like, you mentioned
that stories a second ago,
00:19:12.38\00:19:13.72
with your friends.
00:19:13.75\00:19:15.32
And just a various time,
00:19:15.35\00:19:16.69
you know, it's interesting
how when we change our life,
00:19:16.72\00:19:18.05
we can look back and say,
00:19:18.09\00:19:19.42
wow, I see the
hand of God in that,
00:19:19.45\00:19:21.59
and just see how he protects
were that could have been me.
00:19:21.62\00:19:24.56
So looking back,
what are some instants
00:19:24.59\00:19:26.36
that you seeing like that?
00:19:26.39\00:19:27.73
One particular
that just was the...
00:19:27.76\00:19:31.73
"the straw that
broke the camel's back.".
00:19:31.77\00:19:33.60
Okay.
00:19:33.64\00:19:34.97
In 2003, I was
driving from TGI Friday,
00:19:35.00\00:19:38.07
I remember that because
yesterday I was in Charlotte,
00:19:38.11\00:19:39.57
North Carolina.
00:19:39.61\00:19:40.94
Made a right on to the street
called Independence Boulevard.
00:19:40.98\00:19:43.88
Me and my boy was their,
coming from the restaurant,
00:19:43.91\00:19:47.25
100 yards down the roads
00:19:47.28\00:19:48.62
we seen a bunch of
smoking break lights.
00:19:48.65\00:19:50.25
I remember this
like it was yesterday.
00:19:50.29\00:19:51.79
As we drove closer, we
realized that we are first
00:19:51.82\00:19:54.36
on this car accident, the scene.
00:19:54.39\00:19:56.86
Hoped out the car, I
told my boy, "Call 911."
00:19:56.89\00:19:59.79
Aaron, I remember that like
it was just that I began to walk
00:19:59.83\00:20:02.66
toward the van
that was smashed up.
00:20:02.70\00:20:05.70
As I got closer to the van,
00:20:05.73\00:20:07.07
there was two young ladies
crying, rolling their eyes out.
00:20:07.10\00:20:09.50
And so I began to act smart,
00:20:09.54\00:20:10.87
"You okay? Is
everything all right?"
00:20:10.91\00:20:12.24
And they point out to my right.
00:20:12.27\00:20:14.28
I remember this like
it was yesterday, Aaron,
00:20:14.31\00:20:15.64
and look to my right,
00:20:15.68\00:20:17.11
and this accident was
a head-to-head collusion.
00:20:17.15\00:20:20.58
And because of
the forces of impact,
00:20:20.62\00:20:23.39
the front of this car
was now pushed to the back.
00:20:23.42\00:20:26.42
I began to walk toward this car,
00:20:26.45\00:20:28.49
not knowing that these next
moments will change my life.
00:20:28.52\00:20:31.13
And I seen, Aaron, a
arm hanging out back window.
00:20:31.16\00:20:34.03
Wow.
00:20:34.06\00:20:35.40
As I got closer,
00:20:35.43\00:20:36.93
not knowing that these moments
will change my life, Aaron.
00:20:36.97\00:20:40.24
I looked in and I
saw the young ladies
00:20:40.27\00:20:42.60
who was the driver and because
of the forces of the impact,
00:20:42.64\00:20:46.47
her seat was snapped in
half, her seatbelt was shredded.
00:20:46.51\00:20:49.84
I remember like
it was yesterday.
00:20:49.88\00:20:51.45
She was the driver but because
of the forces of the impact
00:20:51.48\00:20:54.55
she was in the back seat,
00:20:54.58\00:20:56.32
hand smashed through the window.
00:20:56.35\00:20:58.99
I remember like
it was yesterday,
00:20:59.02\00:21:00.36
I seen her
coughing up blood, Aaron,
00:21:00.39\00:21:01.86
and I began to act
as if she was all right.
00:21:01.89\00:21:03.36
I've never seen blood,
00:21:03.39\00:21:04.73
I don't like that type of stuff,
00:21:04.76\00:21:06.09
to be honest with you.
00:21:06.13\00:21:07.46
So I did, the first
thing I've seen on television,
00:21:07.50\00:21:09.46
I began to tell her
to squeeze my fingers.
00:21:09.50\00:21:12.63
I said, "Hold on,
help is on the way."
00:21:12.67\00:21:14.40
I began to ask her name
00:21:14.44\00:21:15.77
and as she would
try to talk to me,
00:21:15.80\00:21:17.51
she will caught up more blood.
00:21:17.54\00:21:18.87
So I said, "Baby, go just chill,
00:21:18.91\00:21:21.14
you know, help is on the way.".
00:21:21.18\00:21:22.51
Okay.
00:21:22.54\00:21:23.88
Aaron, I remember,
her grip getting loose
00:21:23.91\00:21:26.72
and looser on my hands.
00:21:26.75\00:21:29.25
And I did what I should
have done in the beginning.
00:21:29.28\00:21:34.06
I laid down cross on the ground,
00:21:34.09\00:21:35.46
I began to cry out
to God, "Just save her."
00:21:35.49\00:21:40.40
I remember this
like it was yesterday,
00:21:40.43\00:21:41.76
someone tapping on my
shoulder, it's the paramedics.
00:21:41.80\00:21:44.03
He said, "Son, we
have it from here."
00:21:44.07\00:21:47.44
And so I get up, I leave.
00:21:47.47\00:21:48.80
That next day I'm driving,
I ran into one of my boys,
00:21:48.84\00:21:51.07
he's driving the other way,
and I called him on my phone,
00:21:51.11\00:21:53.27
I said, " Darius Dfunk."
00:21:53.31\00:21:54.94
I said, "Where are you going?"
00:21:54.98\00:21:56.31
He said, "You wont believe it,
00:21:56.34\00:21:57.68
my best friend's
sister got killed last night."
00:21:57.71\00:21:59.05
Oh, wow.
00:21:59.08\00:22:00.42
I said, "Oh, I am
sorry to hear that."
00:22:00.45\00:22:01.78
I said, "How?"
00:22:01.82\00:22:03.15
he said, "It was
head-to-head collusion."
00:22:03.18\00:22:04.52
I said, "Wait."
00:22:04.55\00:22:06.05
I said, "Was that at
Independence Boulevard?"
00:22:06.09\00:22:07.66
He said, "Yes." I
said, "No, no, no, wait."
00:22:07.69\00:22:09.42
I said, "Was it by TGI Friday?"
00:22:09.46\00:22:11.26
He said, "Yes."
00:22:11.29\00:22:12.66
I said, "Derek, I was their.".
00:22:12.69\00:22:14.03
Wow.
00:22:14.06\00:22:15.40
"I was their till
the paramedics came,
00:22:15.43\00:22:16.77
I prayed for her."
00:22:16.80\00:22:18.13
Her brother was
in the car with him,
00:22:18.17\00:22:19.60
he hands the brother the phone,
00:22:19.63\00:22:20.97
I began to tell
the brother the story.
00:22:21.00\00:22:22.50
The brother says,
"They pronounced her dead
00:22:22.54\00:22:24.51
before she makes
it to the hospital."
00:22:24.54\00:22:26.54
She leaves two twin
boys, she's 18 years old.
00:22:26.57\00:22:30.18
She works third shift because
she's at school during the day
00:22:30.21\00:22:33.48
and she has two twin
boys, not even one years old.
00:22:33.52\00:22:36.55
Aaron, I remember
like it was yesterday.
00:22:36.58\00:22:38.22
"Got off the phone, I pulled
into a McDonald's parking lot
00:22:38.25\00:22:41.22
and I began to curse God.
00:22:41.26\00:22:43.56
I began to yell at Him as if
He was stranger on the street.
00:22:43.59\00:22:47.53
"Why would You
let me see that God?
00:22:47.56\00:22:49.33
I prayed for You to
save this young lady.
00:22:49.36\00:22:51.87
Why would you do that?"
00:22:51.90\00:22:53.50
And, Aaron, just as
clear as you hear my voice,
00:22:53.54\00:22:57.37
for the first time I
heard God speak to me to me.
00:22:57.41\00:22:59.14
Wow.
00:22:59.17\00:23:00.51
And He said, "DaMarrus,
tomorrow is not promised,
00:23:00.54\00:23:04.75
give your life today."
00:23:04.78\00:23:08.62
And I remember
chills going through my body
00:23:08.65\00:23:13.42
but also peace
that came through it.
00:23:13.46\00:23:16.46
And I remember saying, I
have to make a change today.
00:23:16.49\00:23:20.60
Interesting, two weeks later,
00:23:20.63\00:23:22.16
my father who's all into church,
00:23:22.20\00:23:24.17
now volunteers me to
preach for Youth Day.
00:23:24.20\00:23:27.54
I am like, man, I am
still rough around the edges,
00:23:27.57\00:23:30.71
I am still clubbing.
00:23:30.74\00:23:32.97
Of course, when your
father volunteers you,
00:23:33.01\00:23:34.64
there's ain't no,
it's like you got to do it.
00:23:34.68\00:23:37.81
Preach the sermon, man,
22 kids came down for Christ.
00:23:37.85\00:23:41.35
I said, God, you
used a sinner like me?
00:23:41.38\00:23:44.32
I'm messed up, I smoke, I drink,
00:23:44.35\00:23:47.46
I was fornicating at the time.
00:23:47.49\00:23:49.12
Lord, you gonna
use someone like me?
00:23:49.16\00:23:51.26
And He began to say, you
know, I don't call to qualified,
00:23:51.29\00:23:56.77
but I qualified to call.
00:23:56.80\00:23:58.23
Amen. Amen.
00:23:58.27\00:23:59.67
Yeah, it's been...
00:23:59.70\00:24:01.04
Now talk about
where you're at now.
00:24:01.07\00:24:03.04
You're starting
your own ministry,
00:24:03.07\00:24:04.81
and if you could
shed some light upon that
00:24:04.84\00:24:06.37
and how that helps young
man, young people everywhere.
00:24:06.41\00:24:09.28
Aaron, I'll be honest with you,
00:24:09.31\00:24:10.65
I am so glad you
asked that question.
00:24:10.68\00:24:12.15
I don't know about you,
but I am tired of failing.
00:24:12.18\00:24:15.38
I'm tired as a husband, I
am tired of making mistakes
00:24:15.42\00:24:20.79
that are just
terrible for my family
00:24:20.82\00:24:24.59
Defiantly.
00:24:24.63\00:24:25.96
I am tired of
falling to the same things.
00:24:25.99\00:24:28.20
And what I realized as men,
00:24:28.23\00:24:30.47
we don't talk about
some of the same issues.
00:24:30.50\00:24:32.47
I guarantee, some of my issues
00:24:32.50\00:24:33.84
that I keep it
myself you're going through.
00:24:33.87\00:24:35.94
And want I wanted to
start was a ministry from men,
00:24:35.97\00:24:39.54
the ministry is called
Mending Men Ministries,
00:24:39.57\00:24:42.48
where we're going
to deal with, man,
00:24:42.51\00:24:43.85
what you do when it's you fault?
00:24:43.88\00:24:45.41
When you do when it's your...
00:24:45.45\00:24:46.78
when it was your fault,
when you made the mistake,
00:24:46.82\00:24:48.95
how do you forgive yourself?
00:24:48.98\00:24:51.05
I am learning that God
will expose us for eternity.
00:24:51.09\00:24:55.52
He's not exposing us
to save your marriage,
00:24:55.56\00:24:57.99
He's not exposing you
to save your ministry,
00:24:58.03\00:25:00.96
He's exposing you
to save your life.
00:25:01.00\00:25:03.47
And so I've
started a new ministry
00:25:03.50\00:25:06.03
called Mending Men's Ministry
00:25:06.07\00:25:07.47
where we're dealing with
finances, we're dealing...
00:25:07.50\00:25:10.07
one of the topic is,
00:25:10.11\00:25:13.04
some of the things
that they never told us.
00:25:13.07\00:25:14.41
Okay.
00:25:14.44\00:25:15.78
I have a father
in my life. Okay.
00:25:15.81\00:25:17.15
He did the best he could,
00:25:17.18\00:25:18.88
but there are some
things he didn't tell me.
00:25:18.91\00:25:20.25
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
00:25:20.28\00:25:21.62
And so we're gonna
deal with those things,
00:25:21.65\00:25:22.98
it's a one-on-one healing men
ministry, mending Men Ministry.
00:25:23.02\00:25:26.42
Amen.
00:25:26.45\00:25:27.79
Now looking back on your
life and where you are now
00:25:27.82\00:25:29.89
with a relationship with
Jesus, how important is it you
00:25:29.92\00:25:32.99
or how, what's the
difference feeling that you have
00:25:33.03\00:25:35.30
between now versus the
life when you were drinking,
00:25:35.33\00:25:38.03
and smoking, and clubbing?
00:25:38.07\00:25:39.70
Pain is still
there, hurt is still there.
00:25:39.73\00:25:42.44
Okay.
00:25:42.47\00:25:43.81
Disappointment still there,
I just fell better about it.
00:25:43.84\00:25:47.38
I know it sounds funny
00:25:47.41\00:25:48.74
but I don't walk with my
head down like that anymore.
00:25:48.78\00:25:52.28
I made a mistake, I
pray for forgiveness,
00:25:52.31\00:25:54.65
I acknowledge it
and I keep it moving.
00:25:54.68\00:25:56.12
Amen.
00:25:56.15\00:25:57.49
In the streets,
during that time,
00:25:57.52\00:25:58.85
I never forgave myself.
00:25:58.89\00:26:00.66
I didn't know that
God will forgive me.
00:26:00.69\00:26:02.49
I knew but I didn't believe it.
00:26:02.52\00:26:04.03
And so I walked
around with guilt on my back,
00:26:04.06\00:26:05.89
I walked around
with stress on my back,
00:26:05.93\00:26:07.56
so I had a bad attitude.
00:26:07.60\00:26:08.93
I was snappy at people.
00:26:08.96\00:26:11.03
And so for me, I won't say,
00:26:11.07\00:26:13.37
as a Christian,
life gets better.
00:26:13.40\00:26:16.17
For me, when I accepts
the Jesus and I start to go,
00:26:16.20\00:26:19.07
totally, with my...
still have falls, still fail.
00:26:19.11\00:26:23.38
Ask my wife, she will
say, I probably got issues,
00:26:23.41\00:26:25.88
big issues.
00:26:25.91\00:26:28.08
But now,
00:26:28.12\00:26:29.45
I just have a
different peace about my issues.
00:26:29.48\00:26:30.82
Yeah. Amen.
00:26:30.85\00:26:32.19
You know, have a
different peace of mind.
00:26:32.22\00:26:34.56
I was reading
Psalms 51 where David says,
00:26:34.59\00:26:36.42
I was shaped in an
equity, that's the reality.
00:26:36.46\00:26:39.66
We're born in
this thing. Defiantly.
00:26:39.69\00:26:41.26
And not until Christ purges us,
00:26:41.30\00:26:44.20
you know, and we
testify to others
00:26:44.23\00:26:46.00
about we've been through.
00:26:46.03\00:26:47.37
Amen. Amen.
00:26:47.40\00:26:48.74
Is until we can
have that feeling.
00:26:48.77\00:26:50.11
I want you to take a few moments
00:26:50.14\00:26:51.47
to look into the camera,
00:26:51.51\00:26:52.84
I what you to talk
to that young person
00:26:52.87\00:26:54.21
that is dealing
with the same issues
00:26:54.24\00:26:55.58
that you dealt with
while you were young,
00:26:55.61\00:26:56.95
and I want you to
speak to that person
00:26:56.98\00:26:58.41
about how they
should choose Jesus.
00:26:58.45\00:27:02.68
John 10:10 says, "The
thief comes in order to steal,
00:27:02.72\00:27:06.29
kill, and destroy,
00:27:06.32\00:27:08.82
but I've come
that they may have life
00:27:08.86\00:27:10.29
and have it more abundantly."
00:27:10.33\00:27:12.49
Young people,
young men and women,
00:27:12.53\00:27:15.10
I must be honest with you,
00:27:15.13\00:27:16.87
Satan hates you.
00:27:16.90\00:27:18.70
Satan's strategic plan is
to steal, kill, and destroy,
00:27:18.73\00:27:23.84
that's it,
that's his total agenda.
00:27:23.87\00:27:26.81
But I'm here to let you
know that we have a God,
00:27:26.84\00:27:29.68
we have savior,
we have a Christ,
00:27:29.71\00:27:31.85
we have a friend that wants to
give you life more abundantly.
00:27:31.88\00:27:34.92
Amen.
00:27:34.95\00:27:36.28
Choose today
00:27:36.32\00:27:38.22
for the rest of your
life to follow Christ.
00:27:38.25\00:27:40.99
That doesn't mean
you'll be perfect,
00:27:41.02\00:27:43.12
that doesn't mean
you wont make mistakes,
00:27:43.16\00:27:45.39
that just means that we
have a savior who died for us.
00:27:45.43\00:27:48.23
Amen. Amen.
00:27:48.26\00:27:49.70
I want to thank you, DaMarrus,
for being on the program.
00:27:49.73\00:27:52.23
You've been
watching The New Journey,
00:27:52.27\00:27:53.60
be sure to tune in next
time for an exciting program
00:27:53.64\00:27:55.84
of The New Journey.
00:27:55.87\00:27:57.21