Welcome to The New Journey, a program about real life people, 00:00:08.60\00:00:12.54 with real life testimonies, doing real life 00:00:12.57\00:00:15.28 ministry for Jesus Christ. 00:00:15.31\00:00:16.71 I'm your host, Pastor Marquis Johns. 00:00:16.75\00:00:18.78 Join us on The New Journey. 00:00:18.81\00:00:20.78 Have you ever wondered how Mary might have felt being a young 00:00:52.95\00:00:57.29 lady pregnant out of wedlock? 00:00:57.32\00:00:59.45 Well, on today's show we have one such young lady, 00:00:59.49\00:01:02.02 who may just help us understand how Mary was feeling. 00:01:02.06\00:01:05.29 Mariah Hunt, how are you doing young lady? 00:01:05.33\00:01:07.93 I'm good. Good, fantastic. 00:01:07.96\00:01:09.76 And her mom, Shannon. 00:01:09.80\00:01:11.47 Shannon, how are you doing? 00:01:11.50\00:01:12.83 I'm doing great. Fantastic, fantastic. 00:01:12.87\00:01:14.30 Before we get started, I just want to commend you 00:01:14.34\00:01:17.14 on the step that you are taking. 00:01:17.17\00:01:18.64 This is very courageous. 00:01:18.67\00:01:20.08 What you're going, most young people wouldn't do. 00:01:20.11\00:01:22.51 When they find themselves in this type of a predicament, 00:01:22.54\00:01:24.71 or situation they clam up, they isolate themselves, because they 00:01:24.75\00:01:28.08 fear judgment, and they fear people just not understanding 00:01:28.12\00:01:31.32 what they're going through. 00:01:31.35\00:01:32.69 And so I want you to know that we commend you. 00:01:32.72\00:01:34.26 Thank you. Is that alright? Yep. Good. 00:01:34.29\00:01:35.62 Now, I do also want you to know that we're going to ask 00:01:35.66\00:01:38.93 you tough questions. 00:01:38.96\00:01:40.30 But we're asking these questions because we feel like you telling 00:01:40.33\00:01:43.23 your story will help some young lady, who may be in your 00:01:43.26\00:01:45.93 position, or who may be contemplating doing some of the 00:01:45.97\00:01:48.80 things that got you into this position. 00:01:48.84\00:01:50.91 So what you're doing is you're being a good model, 00:01:50.94\00:01:53.34 you're helping us understand what's going on in the mindset 00:01:53.38\00:01:57.71 of the teenage young person who ends up in a 00:01:57.75\00:02:00.35 pregnancy situation. 00:02:00.38\00:02:01.72 So with that being said, why don't you tell us a little bit 00:02:01.75\00:02:04.59 about yourself, like where are you from? 00:02:04.62\00:02:06.19 Um, I'm from Indiana, a really small town. 00:02:06.22\00:02:10.39 Okay. Which really small town is that? 00:02:10.43\00:02:12.53 Craigville. Craigville, okay. 00:02:12.56\00:02:14.53 I was thinking Craig's List when you said that. 00:02:14.56\00:02:16.36 But in any event... So Craigville, Indiana. 00:02:16.40\00:02:21.34 Tell us about... Are you currently in school? 00:02:21.37\00:02:23.00 Yep, I'm in 11th grade, and I go to school full time. Okay. 00:02:23.04\00:02:27.11 And I still live at home. 00:02:27.14\00:02:28.48 Okay, still live at home with mom. Yes. 00:02:28.51\00:02:30.25 Okay, fantastic. Now, here's where we take the turn. 00:02:30.28\00:02:34.18 So tell us about... Are you still with the young man who 00:02:34.22\00:02:38.09 you're having the baby by? Yes. 00:02:38.12\00:02:39.59 Yes, okay, so tell us the story. 00:02:39.62\00:02:41.72 Where did you guys meet? 00:02:41.76\00:02:43.09 How did you guys meet? 00:02:43.12\00:02:44.46 Was there a twinkle in his eye? 00:02:44.49\00:02:45.89 Was there a sparkle in yours? 00:02:45.93\00:02:47.26 Tell us about that. 00:02:47.30\00:02:48.63 Um, we met at school my sophomore year. 00:02:48.66\00:02:50.90 And we started talking, and dating, and now we've been 00:02:50.93\00:02:56.84 together for a year and a half, and things are good. 00:02:56.87\00:02:59.91 Okay, so tell us about this dating. 00:02:59.94\00:03:01.61 You know, I'm a little bit old, and removed from the scene. 00:03:01.64\00:03:04.38 Shannon, I don't know if you remember what it was like 00:03:04.41\00:03:06.38 in high school dating, but we're out of the loop. 00:03:06.41\00:03:08.68 So how does take place? 00:03:08.72\00:03:10.05 Do I kind of pass you a note? 00:03:10.09\00:03:11.42 Do you pass me back the note? 00:03:11.45\00:03:12.79 How did the whole relationship come about? 00:03:12.82\00:03:15.22 Um, we passed notes in school, back and forth, 00:03:15.26\00:03:18.29 because we weren't allowed to talk. 00:03:18.33\00:03:19.66 And then we'd talk outside of class, and outside of school, 00:03:19.69\00:03:23.87 and he'd come over. Okay. 00:03:23.90\00:03:25.53 We'd just hang out, and that's how they do it 00:03:25.57\00:03:28.67 these days, I guess. 00:03:28.70\00:03:30.04 Okay, so Shannon you were okay with... 00:03:30.07\00:03:31.41 Tell us his name again. Tyler. 00:03:31.44\00:03:32.77 Tyler, so you were okay with Tyler. 00:03:32.81\00:03:34.21 You knew Tyler? Yes, we know Tyler very well. 00:03:34.24\00:03:36.51 Okay, okay. So Tyler and you are starting this relationship 00:03:36.54\00:03:40.02 and now you're spending some time in school, but you're also 00:03:40.05\00:03:42.42 spending some time outside of school. 00:03:42.45\00:03:44.22 So are you guys going on dates, or are you just dating? 00:03:44.25\00:03:47.79 We were dating. We would go on dates, and we would just 00:03:47.82\00:03:51.73 hang out, and we usually just hung out at my house, 00:03:51.76\00:03:55.50 or his house, or places like that. 00:03:55.53\00:03:57.80 And so, Shannon, you were okay with this dating? 00:03:57.83\00:04:00.10 Yes, we were okay with that. 00:04:00.14\00:04:01.50 She was sixteen years old at the time. 00:04:01.54\00:04:04.34 And to me it wasn't a problem for them to be dating at all. 00:04:04.37\00:04:08.41 Okay, okay. So up to this point, had you guys had the 00:04:08.44\00:04:12.38 birds and bees conversation, to where we start talking about, 00:04:12.41\00:04:15.62 Hey, this is what happens in these situations? 00:04:15.65\00:04:18.22 Had you had that conversation? 00:04:18.25\00:04:19.59 We'd had that conversation awhile ago. 00:04:19.62\00:04:22.06 And it was very prevalent in my mind that this 00:04:22.09\00:04:25.99 is what's going on, and I know what goes on these days. 00:04:26.03\00:04:29.70 And please be careful, whatever you do, please be careful. 00:04:29.73\00:04:33.37 Okay, okay. So now you and Tyler, you and Tyler are dating, 00:04:33.40\00:04:39.11 and how long are you dating before the 00:04:39.14\00:04:42.54 relationship becomes intimate? 00:04:42.58\00:04:45.11 We were dating for six or seven months before we started. 00:04:45.15\00:04:49.88 Okay, and so mom, you and mom have had the conversation 00:04:49.92\00:04:52.42 about the birds and bees. 00:04:52.45\00:04:53.79 Now this relationship becomes an intimate relationship. 00:04:53.82\00:04:57.03 Now I'm assuming this was the first time for you. 00:04:57.06\00:04:59.43 Yeah. Okay, so this first time, based on the conversation that 00:04:59.46\00:05:04.30 maybe you and mom had had, did you take some precautions 00:05:04.33\00:05:07.47 the first time that you guys were intimate? 00:05:07.50\00:05:09.47 No. No. Can I ask why not? 00:05:09.50\00:05:11.77 What was it that, you know, was the situation, 00:05:11.81\00:05:14.18 was it one of those where you were spending time together, 00:05:14.21\00:05:16.64 you were looking in his eyes, he was kind of looking in your 00:05:16.68\00:05:18.81 eyes, and you said, Oh, this feels right! 00:05:18.85\00:05:20.42 And so you move forward? 00:05:20.45\00:05:21.88 Or why didn't you take those precautions? 00:05:21.92\00:05:25.25 I guess we didn't really plan on it happening, and it was one 00:05:25.29\00:05:28.62 of those situations where you just... It kind of happened. 00:05:28.66\00:05:31.63 And then... So we didn't plan on it or anything, and I guess 00:05:31.66\00:05:34.70 we just weren't prepared. 00:05:34.73\00:05:36.06 Okay, okay. So now after this how are you guys continuing 00:05:36.10\00:05:40.87 the intimate aspect of your relationship? Yes, we did after. 00:05:40.90\00:05:45.14 And in the process, did you ever say, Okay, well this time lets 00:05:45.17\00:05:49.48 take those precautions? 00:05:49.51\00:05:50.85 Were there ever moments when you decided, 00:05:50.88\00:05:52.45 we will take precautions, versus others where, in the heat of the 00:05:52.48\00:05:55.58 moment, if you will, you didn't take those precautions? 00:05:55.62\00:05:57.92 Yeah, after I didn't really want to be in this situation, 00:05:57.95\00:06:01.02 and so I thought we'd better take precautions 00:06:01.06\00:06:04.23 so it doesn't happen, but it wasn't always like that, so... 00:06:04.26\00:06:08.73 Okay, and how did Tyler feel? 00:06:08.76\00:06:10.13 Who brought that up? 00:06:10.17\00:06:11.50 Who said, Hey, maybe we should take these precautions? 00:06:11.53\00:06:13.13 Was it you, or was it Tyler? 00:06:13.17\00:06:15.27 It was kind of a conversation we both had, because we both 00:06:15.30\00:06:19.14 thought that we're too young to be in this situation. 00:06:19.17\00:06:22.08 And we really didn't want it to happen, so... Sure, sure, sure. 00:06:22.11\00:06:25.81 Okay, so now, young lady, Indiana, high school crush, 00:06:25.85\00:06:31.79 high school sweetheart. 00:06:31.82\00:06:33.15 You guys have been in a relationship for 6 or 7 months, 00:06:33.19\00:06:36.02 the relationship becomes intimate, 00:06:36.06\00:06:37.86 you continue the intimate relationship. 00:06:37.89\00:06:39.66 At which point did you share, or did you share with mom 00:06:39.69\00:06:43.10 that you had now become intimate with Tyler? 00:06:43.13\00:06:45.53 No, I didn't tell her, but I kind of figured she knew. 00:06:45.57\00:06:49.04 Okay, so let me ask this question, and then I want to 00:06:49.10\00:06:52.54 I want, Shannon, I want you to weigh in on this. 00:06:52.57\00:06:54.44 Why didn't you tell Mom, seeing as how you had already kind of 00:06:54.48\00:06:57.55 had a conversation about it? 00:06:57.58\00:06:59.41 Because what the viewers, and what the audience, and even I, 00:06:59.45\00:07:02.58 would like to know is, what is it that prevents teenagers who 00:07:02.62\00:07:06.65 are sexually active, or who are being intimate, from sharing 00:07:06.69\00:07:09.79 that relationship with a parent, adult, or someone that they 00:07:09.82\00:07:12.36 trust who's older than them? 00:07:12.39\00:07:13.80 What was it, given that you had had these conversations 00:07:13.83\00:07:16.53 in the past, that prevented you from sharing with your mother 00:07:16.56\00:07:19.10 that you were now being intimate with your boyfriend? 00:07:19.13\00:07:21.30 I think she already knew. 00:07:21.34\00:07:22.94 And I kind of figured she knew, so I didn't think 00:07:22.97\00:07:26.01 that I had to tell her. 00:07:26.04\00:07:27.38 I didn't really want to have that conversation with her. 00:07:27.51\00:07:29.48 I mean, we have a good relationship, 00:07:29.51\00:07:31.51 but it was kind of awkward for me. 00:07:31.55\00:07:33.52 Why don't you think teenagers who are active, 00:07:33.55\00:07:37.42 why don't you think they talk to their parents? 00:07:37.45\00:07:40.96 What do you think is the reason why? 00:07:40.99\00:07:42.99 Well, for some teenagers it might be that it's an awkward 00:07:43.02\00:07:46.53 situation, or they don't know what their parents will say, 00:07:46.56\00:07:48.76 or they feel like since they're doing something that most adults 00:07:48.80\00:07:53.03 do, that they don't need to tell their parents, 00:07:53.07\00:07:56.20 because they're grown up, and they can do what they want. 00:07:56.24\00:07:59.87 Okay, okay. So now, Shannon, Mariah says she didn't talk 00:07:59.91\00:08:06.31 to you about it because she knows you're not stupid. 00:08:06.35\00:08:08.52 Right. And so she figured, well, she already knows. 00:08:08.55\00:08:11.22 I'm not going to go up and say, Hey mom, guess what I'm doing. 00:08:11.25\00:08:14.22 Did you know? I had my suspicions. Okay. 00:08:14.26\00:08:17.73 I wasn't 100% positive, but there were times when 00:08:17.76\00:08:21.26 we would be like, No, you're not going up to your room. 00:08:21.30\00:08:25.20 If you do go up there to do homework 00:08:25.23\00:08:27.37 the door stays wide open. 00:08:27.40\00:08:28.87 You know, things like that. 00:08:28.90\00:08:30.24 Trying to take our own precautions at the same time. 00:08:30.27\00:08:33.14 Sure. But no, I don't think that I... 00:08:33.17\00:08:35.74 I think, maybe, she didn't tell me because she would think I 00:08:35.78\00:08:40.08 would be disappointed. 00:08:40.12\00:08:41.45 Right, right, right, right. 00:08:41.48\00:08:43.08 And so, I want to go back to the statement that you made, 00:08:43.12\00:08:49.92 Mariah, that a lot of young people aren't forthcoming with 00:08:49.96\00:08:54.46 that information, because they feel like they're adults. 00:08:54.50\00:08:57.90 So at which point you and Tyler were engaged in intimacy 00:08:57.93\00:09:00.57 did you feel like, Hey, you know, I'm kind of an adult here. 00:09:00.60\00:09:02.77 I kind of know, you know, I can take care of 00:09:02.80\00:09:05.21 myself a little bit. 00:09:05.24\00:09:06.57 Were you feeling that way? 00:09:06.61\00:09:07.94 I guess, kind of. I mean it's something that adults do, 00:09:07.98\00:09:12.38 but still I felt like I was a teenager. 00:09:12.41\00:09:14.38 So, I mean yeah, I guess I felt superior, and older, but... 00:09:14.42\00:09:20.16 Right, right, right, right, right. 00:09:20.22\00:09:21.56 ...it really didn't change anything. 00:09:21.59\00:09:22.92 Right, right, because there is... 00:09:22.96\00:09:24.36 I remember growing up, and Christ tells us we have to have 00:09:24.39\00:09:29.26 this childlike faith, you know. 00:09:29.30\00:09:31.03 And in having childlike faith, I have sometimes wondered, 00:09:31.07\00:09:34.37 and pondered what exactly Christ meant. 00:09:34.40\00:09:36.47 And so, Shannon, maybe you will remember growing up as a kid, 00:09:36.50\00:09:39.07 you wake up in the morning, and you go to the shower, 00:09:39.11\00:09:42.31 and you have faith that the water is going to be hot. 00:09:42.34\00:09:44.78 After you get out of the shower, you have faith that when you 00:09:44.81\00:09:47.65 open the refrigerator there's going to be cold milk in there, 00:09:47.68\00:09:50.55 and a box of cereal for you to eat. 00:09:50.59\00:09:51.92 You have faith that your clothes are going to be there, because 00:09:51.95\00:09:54.19 you have faith that your parent is doing their job. 00:09:54.22\00:09:56.83 And so the adult component is not just what got you here as 00:09:56.86\00:10:01.26 a child, but it is also taking care of, and being responsible 00:10:01.30\00:10:04.63 for the child that you bring here. 00:10:04.67\00:10:06.60 Have you and Tyler, or had you and Tyler kind of thought about 00:10:06.63\00:10:09.20 that once you actively, once you have an active intimate life? 00:10:09.24\00:10:13.38 I don't think we thought about it. 00:10:13.41\00:10:15.41 I mean we didn't think that, Oh, that couldn't happen to us, 00:10:15.44\00:10:19.18 or that's not going to be us. 00:10:19.21\00:10:21.22 So what you didn't think; you didn't think that pregnancy, 00:10:21.25\00:10:24.39 or something couldn't happen to us? No. 00:10:24.42\00:10:26.15 You thought, Well, this could happen to us. 00:10:26.19\00:10:27.69 I mean, it's possible, but we never really thought it would. 00:10:27.72\00:10:30.39 so we didn't really think about it. 00:10:30.43\00:10:32.56 We're, it wasn't something we talked about. 00:10:32.59\00:10:36.06 Okay, so that fateful day, and again, this is probably a very 00:10:36.10\00:10:43.34 candid conversation that we're having here, granted, but... 00:10:43.37\00:10:46.21 So the day comes when you realize that you've, 00:10:46.24\00:10:50.25 your cycle has lapsed. 00:10:50.28\00:10:52.25 Take us to that day. 00:10:52.28\00:10:53.88 Take us to the day when you realized... 00:10:53.92\00:10:55.72 And Shannon is already... 00:10:55.75\00:10:57.95 Take us to the day when you realized, Uh oh, I think 00:10:57.99\00:11:02.82 I may be pregnant. 00:11:02.86\00:11:04.19 I remember that day very well, actually. 00:11:04.23\00:11:08.13 Then walk us through it, if you don't mind. 00:11:08.16\00:11:09.60 Um, I woke up and I realized that I hadn't started my period 00:11:09.63\00:11:14.30 for a couple of days, and that wasn't usual. 00:11:14.34\00:11:17.07 So I usually started in the middle of the month, 00:11:17.11\00:11:19.81 and I was waiting for it. 00:11:19.84\00:11:21.21 And I heard that if you stress about it then it doesn't come 00:11:21.24\00:11:24.61 just to scare you. 00:11:24.65\00:11:25.98 So I took a couple of days, and just thought, Oh, it will come. 00:11:26.01\00:11:30.15 But then I woke up that day, and I found out, 00:11:30.19\00:11:32.05 I mean, it's been too long. 00:11:32.09\00:11:34.09 It's just not going to come. 00:11:34.12\00:11:35.46 So I remember I called Tyler, and I told him. 00:11:35.49\00:11:37.99 And he's like, Oh, don't worry about it. 00:11:38.03\00:11:40.56 You'll be fine. Just wait a couple of days. 00:11:40.60\00:11:42.90 So I waited a couple of days, and then... 00:11:42.93\00:11:46.50 So we're stringing together a couple of days, 00:11:46.53\00:11:49.00 a number of times. Yeah. 00:11:49.04\00:11:50.37 So we're waiting for about a week and a half, two weeks. 00:11:50.41\00:11:52.54 Yeah. Okay. So it wasn't just one day. 00:11:52.57\00:11:54.58 I kind of knew, and it took me a while to realize that 00:11:54.61\00:11:58.55 Wow, I guess it can happen to me. 00:11:58.58\00:12:00.85 So... Uh huh, uh huh. 00:12:00.88\00:12:02.22 But I remember I was upset, and I didn't know what to do. 00:12:02.25\00:12:04.49 I didn't want to be a parent. Right. 00:12:04.52\00:12:06.12 I mean, I didn't want to tell my mom. 00:12:06.15\00:12:08.32 I didn't know what she was going to think. 00:12:08.36\00:12:10.09 So it was a very, it was a hard day for me. 00:12:10.13\00:12:12.99 And I just remember crying, and being upset, and not knowing 00:12:13.03\00:12:17.30 what to do, but wanting to talk to my mom. 00:12:17.33\00:12:19.10 And so you've come to the conclusion, I am, I'm, pregnant. 00:12:19.13\00:12:23.34 Yeah. You talked to Tyler. 00:12:23.37\00:12:25.64 This is no longer, I think, it's possible, it's maybe, 00:12:26.68\00:12:31.51 I don't know. It's definite now. 00:12:31.55\00:12:33.98 Yeah. You talked to Tyler. 00:12:34.02\00:12:35.35 What is Tyler's reaction? 00:12:35.38\00:12:36.72 He, I guess you could say he was, he wasn't as 00:12:36.75\00:12:41.76 worried as I was. Uh huh. 00:12:41.79\00:12:43.12 He kept telling me everything was going to be okay. 00:12:43.16\00:12:45.19 And I guess I was the one with the most doubt, 00:12:45.23\00:12:48.03 and the most like, I mean I didn't know what I was 00:12:48.06\00:12:51.93 going to do, or what I was going to tell my mom, 00:12:51.97\00:12:54.17 or how people were going to look at me, 00:12:54.20\00:12:56.71 or anything like that. 00:12:56.74\00:12:58.07 And he just, he just was, It will be okay, 00:12:58.11\00:13:01.21 and just so sure that everything was going to be fine. 00:13:01.24\00:13:03.88 So, I mean he was happy about it, but I mean I was, 00:13:03.91\00:13:08.25 I guess that I was the one that was the most worried 00:13:08.28\00:13:10.62 in this situation. 00:13:10.65\00:13:11.99 And so Tyler is... How old is Tyler? 00:13:12.02\00:13:13.59 He's sixteen. And he's in the same grade as you? Yep. 00:13:13.62\00:13:16.76 Okay, so same school, same grade. 00:13:16.79\00:13:18.53 So now, let's paint the picture. 00:13:18.56\00:13:20.63 So we have this sweet, innocent girl, if you will, 00:13:20.66\00:13:24.83 who is smitten with this guy in her class. 00:13:24.87\00:13:28.47 They begin a relationship; passing notes, 00:13:28.50\00:13:31.87 talking in the hall way, dating outside of school, 00:13:31.91\00:13:35.01 and mom knows about it. 00:13:35.04\00:13:36.38 His parents know about the relationship as well, 00:13:36.41\00:13:38.25 I'm assuming. Okay. 00:13:38.28\00:13:39.61 Parents know about it six months into the relationship 00:13:39.65\00:13:41.88 the subject is broached. 00:13:41.92\00:13:43.25 Here we are, we're being intimate, we continue on, 00:13:43.28\00:13:46.02 and then that fateful day happens where, Oh my, goodness! 00:13:46.05\00:13:49.66 I can't believe it! 00:13:49.69\00:13:51.03 Like you said, it can, and it has happened to me. 00:13:51.06\00:13:54.06 You go to Tyler, and Tyler is like, 00:13:54.10\00:13:55.56 Hey, it's going to be okay. 00:13:55.60\00:13:56.93 So does that calm you down just a little bit? 00:13:56.97\00:13:59.83 Not really. Not really? No. 00:13:59.87\00:14:02.00 Tell me about that. 00:14:02.04\00:14:03.37 It was good to know that he thought that everything was 00:14:03.41\00:14:06.27 going to be okay, and that he wasn't like, Oh well, I guess 00:14:06.31\00:14:10.25 I'm just going to leave. Right. 00:14:10.28\00:14:12.41 I know I wasn't too worried about it, because I know he's 00:14:12.45\00:14:16.18 a nice guy, but I was just glad that he was okay with it. 00:14:16.22\00:14:19.29 And I mean, even though it should have made me feel better, 00:14:19.32\00:14:22.32 I kind of just... I was more worried about my mom. 00:14:22.36\00:14:24.83 Right, right, and that's where we're going next, 00:14:24.86\00:14:27.36 because there's now at least two other conversations 00:14:27.40\00:14:29.86 that have to happen. 00:14:29.90\00:14:31.23 There's the conversation with his parents, 00:14:31.27\00:14:32.70 and the conversation with your parents. 00:14:32.73\00:14:34.77 Walk us up to the point where what you're thinking, 00:14:34.80\00:14:37.77 what's going on in your mind when you know, Oh my, 00:14:37.81\00:14:40.68 I have to tell mom about this. 00:14:40.71\00:14:42.44 I was scared, very scared. 00:14:42.48\00:14:46.18 I mean, me and my mom have a great relationship, 00:14:46.21\00:14:48.35 but sometimes we're not very good at 00:14:48.38\00:14:49.98 communicating with one another. 00:14:50.02\00:14:51.49 And so I knew that this conversation had to happen. 00:14:51.52\00:14:54.72 I just put it off as long as I could. 00:14:54.76\00:14:56.66 And how long was that? 00:14:56.69\00:14:58.03 Four and a half months. 00:14:58.06\00:14:59.39 So, mercy! Okay, Shannon. 00:14:59.43\00:15:02.13 Yeah, yeah. Shannon, we've tried to keep the doors open 00:15:02.16\00:15:07.17 when they're studying, we know that they're going on dates, 00:15:07.20\00:15:10.71 you know that they're hanging out. 00:15:10.74\00:15:12.07 We're not stupid, so there's a possibility... 00:15:12.11\00:15:15.28 We know that they're probably intimate with each other. 00:15:15.31\00:15:20.12 And so, at four months? Uh huh. 00:15:20.15\00:15:27.32 And were you showing yet? 00:15:27.36\00:15:29.06 Like how far along are you now? 00:15:29.09\00:15:31.09 It's almost six and a half months. 00:15:31.13\00:15:33.19 Almost six and a half months. 00:15:33.23\00:15:34.56 At four months were you showing at all? 00:15:34.60\00:15:35.93 I, yeah, yeah. And so, were you doing, were you doing, 00:15:35.96\00:15:39.77 were you taking the precautions? 00:15:39.80\00:15:41.14 Were you wearing the bigger shirts, and things like that, 00:15:41.17\00:15:42.60 so as to put mom off a little bit? Yeah. 00:15:42.64\00:15:44.64 Mom, now, okay so have you noticed 00:15:44.67\00:15:48.31 anything up to this point? 00:15:48.34\00:15:49.81 She was cheerleading up to this point; 00:15:49.84\00:15:52.05 cheerleading for the high school team. Wow! 00:15:52.08\00:15:55.45 Right. Up going to school every day. 00:15:55.48\00:15:58.05 I didn't notice her being sick in the morning. 00:15:58.09\00:16:00.29 I didn't notice any of the telltale signs. Huh. 00:16:00.32\00:16:02.96 Until I did notice one day that she had stretch marks 00:16:02.99\00:16:07.00 on the side of her belly, and I thought, Wow! Okay. 00:16:07.03\00:16:10.73 Hold on a minute! Okay. 00:16:10.77\00:16:12.10 So did this create the atmosphere for the conversation, 00:16:12.13\00:16:14.80 or did you come to mom and say, Mom, I'm pregnant. 00:16:14.84\00:16:17.04 That kind of created the atmosphere. 00:16:17.07\00:16:18.61 Okay, so you saw these stretch marks, and you went in. 00:16:18.64\00:16:20.61 You said, Hey, what's going on here? Right 00:16:20.64\00:16:22.14 So tell us about that. 00:16:22.18\00:16:23.51 It was very difficult because once I realized what those 00:16:23.55\00:16:27.68 stretch marks meant, it was hard for me not to see, 00:16:27.72\00:16:30.85 and not notice, and I was very disappointed at first. Okay. 00:16:30.89\00:16:36.73 Not so much in her, but disappointed for her future. 00:16:36.76\00:16:40.73 Okay. And what that meant for her future, 00:16:40.76\00:16:44.00 and how much more difficult that was going to be. 00:16:44.03\00:16:46.03 And I'm not sure what else to say about that. 00:16:46.07\00:16:53.78 I mean I just, still there's nothing, you know, 00:16:53.81\00:16:56.85 we can't change that. 00:16:56.88\00:16:58.21 I tell her all the time, God doesn't give you more 00:16:58.25\00:16:59.58 than you can handle. 00:16:59.61\00:17:00.95 Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh. 00:17:00.98\00:17:02.32 I tell her that all of the time. 00:17:02.35\00:17:03.69 So is there a time now, the realization has hit: 00:17:03.72\00:17:06.35 We're pregnant. Right. 00:17:06.39\00:17:08.46 Is there a conversation that you have with Mariah and Tyler 00:17:08.49\00:17:12.99 about the situation? 00:17:13.03\00:17:14.36 Do the families, like tell, lead us through that. 00:17:14.40\00:17:17.00 Because this has to have been... 00:17:17.03\00:17:18.37 We had a family conversation with Tyler's mother, 00:17:18.40\00:17:22.10 his step father, myself, and the two kids. Okay. 00:17:22.14\00:17:26.64 And sat down and said, We know that this isn't going to be 00:17:26.68\00:17:29.61 easy, and we're here to help you as much as we can. 00:17:29.64\00:17:32.31 And I wanted to make sure that his side of the family 00:17:32.35\00:17:34.58 was also just as supportive, because I can't do this 00:17:34.62\00:17:38.15 all by myself; they certainly can't do this all by themselves. 00:17:38.19\00:17:41.89 Right, right, right. 00:17:41.92\00:17:43.26 They need to finish school. 00:17:43.29\00:17:44.63 They need to go to college. 00:17:44.66\00:17:45.99 They need to still better themselves. 00:17:46.03\00:17:48.86 They're still teenagers. 00:17:48.90\00:17:51.53 You know, they're still kids. 00:17:51.57\00:17:53.64 So, now, unfortunately, or fortunately, depending upon 00:17:53.67\00:17:58.77 from which angle you're looking at this, there are a number of 00:17:58.81\00:18:01.18 options when a young lady finds themselves in 00:18:01.21\00:18:04.18 in this predicament and situation. 00:18:04.21\00:18:06.55 Did you ever entertain any of those other options? 00:18:06.58\00:18:10.22 Do you understand what I'm asking? Yes. 00:18:10.25\00:18:11.59 Did you ever entertain any of those other options? 00:18:11.62\00:18:14.39 Yes, I did. I thought for quite a long time about adoption, 00:18:14.42\00:18:21.63 and I really, I mean, I know that they're people out there 00:18:21.66\00:18:26.07 that would love to have kids that can't, and I'm blessed 00:18:26.10\00:18:30.37 that I can, but I'm just not a strong enough person 00:18:30.41\00:18:33.07 to be willing to, I mean put joy in somebody else's life, 00:18:33.11\00:18:37.85 I know that, but I just, I couldn't put myself in that 00:18:37.88\00:18:42.82 position to do that. 00:18:42.85\00:18:44.19 And I knew that with the help of my mom, and with Tyler's 00:18:44.22\00:18:47.69 family, and with Tyler that, and with God, that I could 00:18:47.72\00:18:52.09 do it, no matter what, so. Okay. 00:18:52.13\00:18:54.90 So, so, so, so, so, Shannon, God where are You? 00:18:54.93\00:18:59.20 Where are You right now? 00:18:59.23\00:19:01.27 I prayed a lot about this. 00:19:01.30\00:19:03.34 I prayed for answers. 00:19:03.37\00:19:04.97 I prayed for guidance. 00:19:05.01\00:19:08.01 I prayed for Him to just show me the way, and what am I supposed 00:19:08.04\00:19:11.08 to do as far as how to even deal with her in this situation. 00:19:11.11\00:19:16.62 I mean, because I was not happy. Okay. 00:19:16.65\00:19:19.32 So, and I got the answers that I needed. Okay. 00:19:19.35\00:19:22.72 And that's why I'm here with her, and I've been by her side, 00:19:22.79\00:19:27.10 and we're going to be alright. 00:19:27.13\00:19:29.73 So your baby is now having a baby. 00:19:29.76\00:19:36.81 Now this is just a moment for you, and I don't know if you've 00:19:36.84\00:19:40.21 been able to share this with her. 00:19:40.24\00:19:42.38 How are you feeling about becoming a grand mother? 00:19:42.41\00:19:49.02 I've already chosen the name Nana, so it doesn't 00:19:49.05\00:19:52.72 sound like grandma. Okay. 00:19:52.75\00:19:54.19 And I'm, you know, I'm excited for you. 00:19:54.22\00:19:59.63 I think you're going to be a fantastic mother. 00:19:59.66\00:20:01.96 I wish that you would have waited to do it. 00:20:02.36\00:20:05.07 But I'm here for you, and I'm going to help you as much as 00:20:05.10\00:20:09.44 I can, and as much as you need. 00:20:09.47\00:20:11.51 Thanks, mom. We can get through this. 00:20:11.54\00:20:14.44 Great, great, great. Now, this is the segment, 00:20:16.54\00:20:20.22 this is the portion of time in the show where I want to give 00:20:20.25\00:20:22.35 each of you an opportunity to speak to our audience. 00:20:22.38\00:20:25.79 First I want to start with you, Mariah. 00:20:25.82\00:20:28.32 Out there right now there's a young lady who is watching, 00:20:28.36\00:20:30.76 who loves their boyfriend just as much as you 00:20:30.79\00:20:34.73 probably loved Tyler, and who's contemplating 00:20:34.76\00:20:37.50 taking that next step. 00:20:37.53\00:20:39.50 I'd like you to speak to them and tell them what you think 00:20:39.53\00:20:45.31 they should do in that situation. 00:20:45.34\00:20:47.01 As a matter of fact, almost as though you have it to do over. 00:20:47.04\00:20:50.61 Oh, wow! And then I also, I not only want you to address them 00:20:50.65\00:20:54.35 in that fashion, but I want you to also then talk to the young 00:20:54.38\00:20:58.09 lady out there who's 15, 16 years old, 00:20:58.12\00:21:01.19 and she's currently pregnant. 00:21:01.22\00:21:03.12 I want you to talk to both of those young ladies. 00:21:03.16\00:21:06.53 Right over my shoulder here, I want you to speak to them 00:21:06.56\00:21:10.73 about the decision that you've made, how it's effecting you, 00:21:10.77\00:21:13.34 what you would do if you could do it over. 00:21:13.37\00:21:17.21 And how trusting God in this situation is helping you. 00:21:17.24\00:21:23.21 Go ahead. In this situation I would say that to any girl, 00:21:23.24\00:21:28.12 that it's not worth it. 00:21:28.15\00:21:30.65 No boy in high school is worth it. 00:21:30.69\00:21:32.59 I mean, if they say that they love you, they may mean it, 00:21:32.62\00:21:35.39 but that doesn't mean that you have to, or you shouldn't feel 00:21:35.42\00:21:39.29 forced to, or anything like that. 00:21:39.33\00:21:41.26 School is really important, and I would, I honestly wish 00:21:41.30\00:21:44.40 I would have waited. 00:21:44.43\00:21:45.77 Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh. 00:21:45.80\00:21:47.64 So now in the audience watching right now there is a young lady 00:21:47.67\00:21:52.87 who's 15, she's 16, she's pregnant. 00:21:52.91\00:21:55.08 What I want you to do now is I want you to speak to her 00:21:55.11\00:21:58.21 about how trust in God can pull you through 00:21:58.25\00:22:01.12 a situation like this, almost as though, like what you would 00:22:01.15\00:22:05.05 say about your mom. 00:22:05.09\00:22:06.42 You know, how mom, she's your mom regardless. 00:22:06.45\00:22:08.49 She's here. I want you to speak now to that young lady and say 00:22:08.52\00:22:11.66 to her, speak to her about how trust in God through a situation 00:22:11.69\00:22:14.86 like this can really anchor her. 00:22:14.90\00:22:18.27 Well, I think God works in many different ways, and He's always 00:22:18.30\00:22:21.64 there, and no matter what, He's not judging you, or looking down 00:22:21.67\00:22:25.94 upon you, or anything like that. 00:22:25.97\00:22:27.71 He will always help you just like your parents will. 00:22:27.74\00:22:30.01 He loves you no matter what. 00:22:30.05\00:22:32.11 So I just know that without the help of my parents, and God, 00:22:32.15\00:22:36.35 and with all the support that I wouldn't get through it. 00:22:36.38\00:22:41.39 But, yeah. Alright, alright. 00:22:41.42\00:22:43.49 Now Shannon, we're going to take a more informed perspective 00:22:43.53\00:22:47.46 on this, because you're a parent. 00:22:47.50\00:22:49.53 And out there there is a young lady, there is Mariah, 00:22:49.56\00:22:55.27 who is now active with her boyfriend, 00:22:55.30\00:22:58.84 or she's contemplating being active with her boyfriend. 00:22:58.87\00:23:01.24 And you have the opportunity to have the conversation with that 00:23:01.28\00:23:04.65 young lady, like you wish you had been afforded the 00:23:04.68\00:23:07.38 opportunity to have that conversation with Mariah. 00:23:07.42\00:23:09.62 She's contemplating, she's come to you, she's saying, 00:23:09.65\00:23:12.05 mom, I love Tyler, and we're thinking about going 00:23:12.09\00:23:16.22 to the next level. 00:23:16.26\00:23:17.59 I wish I would have happened. 00:23:17.63\00:23:18.96 I know, I know, I know. 00:23:18.99\00:23:20.33 So what we're going to do is we're going to now speak 00:23:20.36\00:23:23.00 to that young lady. 00:23:23.03\00:23:24.67 I want you to speak to that young lady. 00:23:24.70\00:23:26.40 Right over my shoulder there's a camera. 00:23:26.43\00:23:27.77 I want you to speak to that young lady. 00:23:27.80\00:23:29.24 She's contemplating, because she loves her boyfriend, 00:23:29.27\00:23:33.71 taking the relationship to the intimate place. 00:23:33.74\00:23:36.75 Can you now speak to her? 00:23:36.78\00:23:38.38 I would say, if I had that choice, that you need to 00:23:38.41\00:23:43.99 pray about that before you do anything. 00:23:44.02\00:23:46.39 That you need to look at all of the problems that come 00:23:46.42\00:23:51.49 with having the blessing of a baby. 00:23:51.53\00:23:54.53 You know, there's, who's going to pay the bills? 00:23:54.56\00:23:58.47 Who's going to take care of that child when it's sick? 00:23:58.50\00:24:01.30 Who's going to take care of you if you're a teenage daughter, 00:24:01.34\00:24:05.74 or boy with a baby on the way? 00:24:05.77\00:24:08.44 Someone still has to take care of you, so how are you able 00:24:08.48\00:24:12.31 to take care of another human being? 00:24:12.35\00:24:13.95 You have to rely on someone, and who's that going to be? 00:24:13.98\00:24:18.35 There are a lot more things that are involved in having 00:24:18.39\00:24:22.12 a baby than just being intimate and having a baby. 00:24:22.16\00:24:25.53 Uh huh, uh huh, and this, what you're speaking to now, 00:24:25.56\00:24:29.06 is the potential eventuality, if you will, of if you're going to 00:24:29.10\00:24:34.20 engage in an intimate relationship, 00:24:34.24\00:24:36.07 a child is something that could happen. Exactly. 00:24:36.10\00:24:39.37 A child is something that... 00:24:39.41\00:24:40.74 And so what in essence I hear you saying to that young lady 00:24:40.78\00:24:43.95 is, You might want to wait. 00:24:43.98\00:24:46.18 You might want to think about that. 00:24:46.21\00:24:47.92 There's some, again, like you said, more important things. 00:24:47.95\00:24:50.52 There was a phrase going around when I was in school amongst 00:24:50.55\00:24:53.56 the young ladies, Books Before Boys. Uh huh. 00:24:53.59\00:24:56.26 You know, let's put books before boys. 00:24:56.29\00:24:57.79 Let's make sure that we're doing what need to do in school, 00:24:57.83\00:25:00.36 because God has blessed us. 00:25:00.40\00:25:04.20 I mean one of the first gifts that He gave to man was to 00:25:04.23\00:25:06.70 be fruitful and multiply. 00:25:06.74\00:25:08.64 But if you look in the Bible, this is something I'd like to 00:25:08.67\00:25:10.81 share with both of you, and maybe even you can share this 00:25:10.84\00:25:13.44 with Tyler, if he's watching, or you can share it with 00:25:13.48\00:25:15.38 him on your own time. 00:25:15.41\00:25:16.75 When God created Adam, Adam seemingly was perfect. 00:25:16.78\00:25:22.48 Everything was great. 00:25:22.52\00:25:23.89 Everything was just wonderful. 00:25:23.92\00:25:25.92 And God looked and said, It is not good that 00:25:25.95\00:25:28.16 man should be alone. 00:25:28.19\00:25:29.52 But I need you to know that there were a couple of things 00:25:29.56\00:25:32.06 that God put in place before He gave Adam an help meet. 00:25:32.09\00:25:37.40 I want you to notice that the first thing He showed him, 00:25:37.43\00:25:39.43 He said, Listen, Adam, here is your work. 00:25:39.47\00:25:42.70 Adam had a job. Before he ever got a wife, Adam had a job. 00:25:42.74\00:25:48.98 And then God said, Not only is your job to tend and dress 00:25:49.01\00:25:52.51 the garden, but here is where you will live. 00:25:52.55\00:25:54.98 Adam had a place for his wife to stay before 00:25:55.02\00:26:00.02 he ever had a wife. 00:26:00.06\00:26:01.39 So as you contemplate going to that next level, 00:26:01.42\00:26:04.96 and as you think about these things, you have to understand 00:26:04.99\00:26:07.66 that God in His perfect, infinite wisdom, 00:26:07.70\00:26:11.87 before He gave Adam a wife, He made sure Adam had a job, 00:26:11.90\00:26:17.67 and a place to stay that wasn't mom's house, it wasn't dad's 00:26:17.71\00:26:23.18 house, it was his own house. 00:26:23.21\00:26:24.81 You understand what I'm saying? 00:26:24.85\00:26:26.18 And then the third, and most important thing that I'd like 00:26:26.21\00:26:28.82 to just impart to you both, is that what God did, 00:26:28.85\00:26:32.69 that was he tested the mind of Adam. 00:26:32.72\00:26:35.52 You know, He said, Adam, what are these animals here? 00:26:35.56\00:26:39.63 And Adam was able to give a name to each one of those animals, 00:26:39.66\00:26:43.30 signifying not that He was originating the name only, 00:26:43.33\00:26:46.60 but that he knew exactly what God would call them. 00:26:46.63\00:26:50.87 His mind was linked to the mind of God. 00:26:50.91\00:26:53.88 And when sin entered the world, we lost that mind. 00:26:53.91\00:26:56.68 We lost our minds. 00:26:56.71\00:26:58.08 And so this is why Paul tells us in the book of Philippians, 00:26:58.11\00:27:01.95 Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus. 00:27:01.98\00:27:05.49 So if you, from this point on, to the young lady, 00:27:05.52\00:27:08.32 and the young man that's watching, and is considering 00:27:08.36\00:27:11.73 intimacy, or considering possibly having a child, 00:27:11.76\00:27:15.06 think about these things. 00:27:15.13\00:27:16.46 If you don't have, first and foremost a job, if you don't 00:27:16.50\00:27:19.47 have a place to stay, and most importantly, the mind of Christ, 00:27:19.53\00:27:23.37 then you're not ready for this responsibility. 00:27:23.41\00:27:26.41 You're not ready for this responsibility. 00:27:26.44\00:27:28.61 I, again, I still applaud and commend your bravery. 00:27:28.64\00:27:31.48 And I'm sure, I'm sure, that as your mom said, 00:27:31.51\00:27:34.22 you'll be a good mom. 00:27:34.25\00:27:35.58 And maybe this child, you can share those three things with. 00:27:35.62\00:27:38.62 If they come to you, Mom, I'm thinking about going to the next 00:27:38.65\00:27:41.62 level with my boyfriend, my girlfriend, you can say, 00:27:41.66\00:27:45.76 Well, here's something that a pastor told me: 00:27:45.79\00:27:48.26 job, place to stay, mind of Christ. 00:27:48.30\00:27:51.97 And you, even now, are still afforded the ability. 00:27:52.00\00:27:55.00 You can dare to dream that this won't be 00:27:55.04\00:27:58.31 repeated with your child. 00:27:58.34\00:28:00.21 God bless you, and we welcome you on your new journey, Mariah. 00:28:00.24\00:28:05.61 Thank you. 00:28:05.65\00:28:06.98