GUEST. ANGIE,
HOPEFULLY YOU'RE ABLE TO
00:00:18.28\00:00:23.32
JOIN US FOR THE FIRST HOUR.
LET ME JUST READ THIS TITLE TO
00:00:23.32\00:00:26.79
YOU. WITH TITLES.
00:00:26.79\00:00:31.76
TO HAVE AND TO HOLD ON. IT
HAS TO DO WITH BUILDING THE
00:00:31.76\00:00:34.96
MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP.
WE'RE ALL INVOLVED IN DIFFERENT
00:00:34.96\00:00:37.30
TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS.
BUT PASTOR AGAIN JUST GIVE US A
00:00:37.30\00:00:41.07
QUICK SUMMARY OF WHAT WE
COVERED IN THE FIRST HOUR.
00:00:41.07\00:00:43.54
WE HAVE A LOT MORE TO   AND
YOU HAVE SOME GREAT PICTURES.
00:00:43.54\00:00:52.85
I TOLD YOU THAT I HAVE ONE
HERE. WE'RE ASKD A QUESTION.
00:00:52.85\00:01:10.87
CALL US AT 618-627-4651.
THE CALL CENTER IS OPEN TONIGHT.
00:01:10.87\00:01:14.94
618-627-4651 WE WANT TO KNOW
HOW LONG YOU'VE BEEN MARRIED.
00:01:14.94\00:01:22.58
WE'RE GOING TO SEND A SPECIAL
GIFT TO THE COUPLE WHO HAS BEEN
00:01:22.58\00:01:26.82
MARRIED THE LONG US OR
E-MAIL US AT LIVE@3ABN.TV.
00:01:26.82\00:01:32.22
WONDERFUL A TIME HERE TONIGHT,
BUT MAYBE YOU HAVE A SERIOUS
00:01:32.22\00:01:36.16
QUESTION REGARDING A
RELATIONSHIP ISSUE THAT YOU'RE
00:01:36.16\00:01:40.30
ENCOUNTERING RIGHT NOW. OR
YOU HAVE A MATTER FOR SPECIAL
00:01:40.30\00:01:43.93
PRAYER. >> WE'RE
GETTING SOME OF THOSE
00:01:43.93\00:01:49.04
QUESTIONS WE HAVE AN OUTLINE
THAT WE WANT TO CONTINUE WITH,
00:01:49.04\00:01:52.44
BUT WE WANT TO GET TO
SOME OF THESE QUESTIONS.
00:01:52.44\00:01:56.81
THE CALL CENTER OR THE E-MAIL.
>> ARE YOU GOING TO TELL US?
00:01:56.81\00:02:01.25
>> YES, YES. >> I
HONESTLY DIDN'T LOSE IT ON
00:02:01.25\00:02:08.46
PURPOSE. RIGHT.
00:02:08.46\00:02:13.09
OH, GOOD. >> CELEBRATING THEIR
00:02:13.09\00:02:22.44
68TH WEDDING
ANNIVERSARY BY NEXT WEEK.
00:02:22.44\00:02:28.48
SO FOR 68 YEARS NEXT WEEK.
>> THAT MAKES ME WANT TO CRY.
00:02:28.48\00:02:38.95
>> THEY HAVE 12
CHILDREN, A DOZEN CHILDREN.
00:02:38.95\00:02:43.06
>> ABRAHAM AND SARA? >>
IT DOESN'T GIVE THE NAME
00:02:43.06\00:02:46.16
HERE, I DON'T KNOW IF I'M
MISSING IT, BUT THEY'RE FROM
00:02:46.16\00:02:49.86
MISSOURI. SO
PASTOR, A SUMMARY REALLY
00:02:49.86\00:02:56.10
QUICK AND THEN CONTINUATION.
>> MARRIAGE IS A DIVINE
00:02:56.10\00:03:00.71
RELATIONSHIP IN HUMAN
VESSELS AND MARRIAGE IS:
00:03:00.71\00:03:04.31
>> THE REFLECTION OF DIVINE LIVE
FLU HUMAN VESSEL    
STRESS--THROUGH HUMAN
00:03:04.31\00:03:12.25
VESSEL AS SOON AS
AND IT'S THROUGH ESTEEM.
00:03:12.25\00:03:17.13
FIRST HOUR. WE
WANT TO SHOW A COUPLE OF
00:03:17.13\00:03:20.03
PICTURES. >> OH, GOOD.
00:03:20.03\00:03:42.55
>> THIS IS PICTURES
MUCH US THROUGH THE YEARS.
00:03:42.55\00:03:45.35
HE WROTE A SONG CALLED "DESTINED
TO BE ONE" AND THAT JUST TOUCHES
00:03:45.35\00:03:51.23
MY HEART. >> AND
THEN A CD "NEVER ALONE,"
00:03:51.23\00:03:56.50
THAT'S ON "  "DESTINED TO
BE ONE." THIS IS MY WIFE AND I.
00:03:56.50\00:04:03.41
THIS ISN'T TOO LONG
AGO. THIS IS IN NEW YORK.
00:04:03.41\00:04:06.27
WE WERE INVITED THERE LAST
YEAR. >> IT LOOKS LIKE A STUDIO
00:04:06.27\00:04:22.39
PICTURE. >>
YOU'RE DOING A SEMINAR.
00:04:22.39\00:04:25.93
>> I WAS THERE TO
SPEAK TO THE OAKWOOD ALUMNI.
00:04:25.93\00:04:29.83
BUT THIS IS SPECIAL FOR
US. >> LET'S LOOK AT THAT.
00:04:29.83\00:04:44.95
>> ON THE RIGHT WHEN WE
CELEBRATED OUR 25TH ANNIVERSARY.
00:04:44.95\00:04:49.92
>> A BEAUTIFUL COUPLE. >>
I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT PICTURE
00:04:49.92\00:04:52.85
IS 10 YEARS AGO.
>> NOW MARRIED 35 NOW.
00:04:52.85\00:04:57.56
>> 35 YEARS. LOT,
AND EVERY DAY WE HAVE
00:04:57.56\00:05:02.20
LAUGH. >> OR SOMEBODY ELSE.
00:05:02.20\00:05:05.23
YEAH. WE STUDY
RIGHT NOW WE'RE GOING
00:05:05.23\00:05:09.94
THROUGH-- AND KINGS.
00:05:09.94\00:05:14.78
>> AS WELL AS THE
BIBLE. BUT WE STUDY TOGETHER.
00:05:14.78\00:05:17.21
IT'S SO IMPORTANT.
>> THAT'S POWERFUL.
00:05:17.21\00:05:27.99
SO SHE GETS UP
EARLIER THAN I DO.
00:05:27.99\00:05:32.03
DO MY CLOUDY EYES TO READ
A DEVOTION WITH HER AND PRAY
00:05:32.03\00:05:35.33
BEFORE SHE RUNS OUT THE DOOR.
AND THEN THE EVENING IS WHEN
00:05:35.33\00:05:38.57
WE-- WE HAVE A
LAMP OVER OUR BED.
00:05:38.57\00:05:44.41
JUST NICE AND BRIGHT. AND
WE READ THE BIBLE TOGETHER.
00:05:44.41\00:05:48.08
AND THEN SHE CARRIES ME THROUGH
PROPHETS AND KINGS TOGETHER.
00:05:48.08\00:05:51.21
WE'RE GOING THROUGH OUR BIBLE
TOGETHER FOR THE SECOND TIME.
00:05:51.21\00:05:54.08
I NEVER FORGOT WHEN WE--WE WERE
IN PARADISE, CALIFORNIA, WHEN WE
00:05:54.08\00:05:58.32
WERE READING THE
CHAPTER WHERE JOSEPH--
00:05:58.32\00:06:03.46
>> OH, WHERE HE DIES. >> I
LOOKED OVER TO ANGIE, AND I
00:06:03.46\00:06:08.36
SAID ARE YOU OKY? SHE
SAID--I WANT TO MEET JOSEPH.
00:06:08.36\00:06:13.54
>> AAH. >> I WAS
GOING TO ASK WHAT MAKES
00:06:13.54\00:06:27.22
A MARRIAGE STRONG.
WE'VE TALKED ABOUT NOT
00:06:27.22\00:06:30.75
GOSSIPPING ABOUT YOUR SPOUSE OR
THEIR FALSES WITH OTHER PEOPLE.
00:06:30.75\00:06:34.59
WHAT ARE SOME OTHER KEYS
TO MAKE A MARRIAGE STRONG?
00:06:34.59\00:06:37.79
>> WELL, COMMUNICATE,
COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE.
00:06:37.79\00:06:40.26
>> TO EACH OTHER.
>> NOT TO ANYBODY ELSE.
00:06:40.26\00:06:54.04
>> SOMETIMES WE'LL GO TO
RESTAURANTS AND THEY'RE JUST
00:06:54.04\00:06:56.78
SITTING THERE ON THEIR PHONE.
DON'T THEY HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY
00:06:56.78\00:07:02.18
TO EACH OTHER? >>
SOMETIMES THERE WILL BE
00:07:02.18\00:07:08.36
AND THEIR HUSBAND AND WIFE.
AND THEY LOOK UP FOR THEIR FOOD
00:07:08.36\00:07:13.16
AND THEN BACK TO THEIR DEVICES.
THERE ARE KEYS TO COMMUNICATE.
00:07:13.16\00:07:16.36
WE'VE LEARNED BECAUSE IN THE
NINE YEARS OF DATING, ANGIE AND
00:07:16.36\00:07:21.10
I CAN TALK ABOUT THAT, WE
WERE VERY YOUNG AND SELFISH.
00:07:21.10\00:07:24.47
>> VERY SELFISH. >> IT
WAS ALL ABOUT ME, WHAT I
00:07:24.47\00:07:28.08
WANTED. >> OH, YEAH.
00:07:28.08\00:07:34.68
ARGUMENT? >> OH-- BELIEVE IT?
00:07:34.68\00:07:39.02
>> WE'RE PERFECTLY I AM
PERFECT. I WON SOME TEDDY BEAR.
00:07:39.02\00:07:49.66
I SHE SAID, I WANT
THEM ALL. I SAID, NO.
00:07:49.66\00:07:56.17
I WAS SO ANGRY. HAD AN
UMBRELLA AND I THREW IT
00:07:56.17\00:08:00.58
IN THE WATERFALL.
>> A BIG FOUNTAIN.
00:08:00.58\00:08:03.85
>> IN NEW YORK AND AFTER I THREW
IT IN THERE, I REALIZED I WANTED
00:08:03.85\00:08:08.22
IT, BUT THE WATERFALL
WAS TOO DEEP TO GET IT.
00:08:08.22\00:08:14.76
>> I LOST MY BEAUTIFUL GOLF
UMBRELLA WHEN THEY FIRST CAME
00:08:14.76\00:08:18.06
OUT. BOW AND ARROW.
00:08:18.06\00:08:22.36
I CARRIED IT AROUND LIKE IT WAS
A SHEATH SO THAT WHEN IT RAINED
00:08:22.36\00:08:27.24
I WOULD PULL IT OUT.
AND THEN I THREW IT IN A
00:08:27.24\00:08:31.34
FOUNTAIN AT TIMES
SQUARE. >> HOW DID YOU FEEL WITH
00:08:31.34\00:08:36.88
DIFFERENCES OF OPINION?
>> WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT, WE
00:08:36.88\00:08:40.12
LEARNED AND WE'RE GOING TO
BOUNCE BACK AND FORTH ON THIS,
00:08:40.12\00:08:43.89
BUT WE LEARNED THAT
YOU EITHER WIN TOGETHER.
00:08:43.89\00:08:50.56
>> I DON'T WIN AN ARGUMENT
AND SHE LOSES AN ARGUMENT.
00:08:50.56\00:08:56.50
WE'RE ON THE SAME TEAM.
>> THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS US
00:08:56.50\00:09:04.97
TREMENDOUSLY.
SEEN BASEBALL BEFORE.
00:09:04.97\00:09:10.21
AND PEOPLE, GETTING HITS OFF OF
HIM OR THE CATCHER WALKS UP TO
00:09:10.21\00:09:13.82
THE PITCHER. HE
DOESN'T GET ANGRY.
00:09:13.82\00:09:17.49
ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU TIRED?
00:09:17.49\00:09:19.75
WELL, LET'S
BRING IN ANOTHER GUY.
00:09:19.75\00:09:24.96
TOGETHER AND THEY LOSE TOGETHER.
I HAD A SEMINAR CALLED HOW TO
00:09:24.96\00:09:29.16
FIGHT FAIR. BUT WE
WANT TO TAK ABOUT SOME
00:09:29.16\00:09:33.23
OF THE WAYS TO COMMUNICATE.
THESE ARE SOME OF THE KEYS THAT
00:09:33.23\00:09:36.67
WE BROUGHT OUT. AS SO
WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT
00:09:36.67\00:09:39.77
WAYS TO LISTEN. MY
WIFE AND I ARE TOGETHER.
00:09:39.77\00:09:43.61
WAYS TO LISTEN.
LISTEN WITH YOUR EYES.
00:09:43.61\00:09:49.55
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? >>
HONEY, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
00:09:49.55\00:09:53.59
YOU KNOW
EXACTLY WHAT THAT MEANS.
00:09:53.59\00:09:57.86
>> LISTEN WITH YOUR EYES.
WHAT DO YOU TELL ME WHEN I'M NOT
00:09:57.86\00:10:00.80
LOOKING AT YOU. >> I
SAY JOHN, LOOK AT ME.
00:10:00.80\00:10:03.53
BECAUSE YOU KNOW,
YOU'LL BE DOING SOMETHING.
00:10:03.53\00:10:10.91
>> AND I FEEL LIKE
HE'S NOT PAYING ATTENTION.
00:10:10.91\00:10:15.41
>> RIGHT. WHEN WE'RE TALKING.
00:10:15.41\00:10:18.98
THEN HE'LL LOOK AT ME AND I WILL
SAY, WE NEED TO LOOK AT EACH
00:10:18.98\00:10:22.95
OTHER. DO YOU
HEAR WHAT I'M SAYING?
00:10:22.95\00:10:31.69
THEN WHAT DO YOU DO?
>> I LOOK IN HER EYES.
00:10:31.69\00:10:38.87
>> IT MELTS MY HEART
WHEN I KNOW HE'S LISTENING.
00:10:38.87\00:10:42.20
HE'S NOT DOING OTHER
THINGS. HE'S LISTENING TO ME.
00:10:42.20\00:10:46.78
>> LISTEN WITH YOUR EYES.
MAKE CONTACT WITH YOUR SPOUSE.
00:10:46.78\00:10:50.61
>> THE EYES ARE
THE AVENUE TO THE SOUL.
00:10:50.61\00:10:54.18
THAT WE CANNOT
LOOK AT EACH OTHER.
00:10:54.18\00:10:58.89
YOU'RE LOOKING OVER HERE OR
LOOKING OVER THERE, SOMETHING IS
00:10:58.89\00:11:03.02
WRONG. SOUL.
00:11:03.02\00:11:08.76
WHAT YOU'LL NOTICE, EVE WHEN
SHE SAID THAT, I NOTICED HER
00:11:08.76\00:11:12.73
EYES WOULD TEAR UP. I
COULD LOOK IN HER EYES AND I
00:11:12.73\00:11:16.17
COULD TELL THAT SHE WAS NOT
SPEAKING JUST WITH HER MOUTH BUT
00:11:16.17\00:11:19.07
HER HEART. EYE CONTACT.
00:11:19.07\00:11:22.74
IT'S SOMETHING
THAT I HAD TO LEARN.
00:11:22.74\00:11:28.68
100 MPH. >> BUT
WHEN I'M TALKING I LEARN
00:11:28.68\00:11:35.89
TO TURN IT OFF AND LISTEN.
THE OTHER THING IS TO LISTEN
00:11:35.89\00:11:40.43
WITH YOUR MOUTH. >>
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
00:11:40.43\00:11:43.43
>> TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH
SHUT. >> DON'T INTERRUPT.
00:11:43.43\00:11:51.14
INTERRUPTION ON CRITICAL
THINGS IS A VERY SERIOUS ISSUE.
00:11:51.14\00:11:54.28
BUT WE NEED TO HAVE
SERIOUS CONVERSATION AND SLIGHT
00:11:54.28\00:12:00.28
CONVERSATION.
CONVERSATION, THE BIGGEST THING,
00:12:00.28\00:12:04.72
THE BIGGEST ACHILLES HEELS FOR
COUPLES, THEY LISTEN LONG ENOUGH
00:12:04.72\00:12:11.19
AND THEN WAIT FOR AN OPEN
SPOT TO SAY BUT OR HOWEVER, BUT
00:12:11.19\00:12:16.33
THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU MEANT.
THE TRAINING TO KEEP YOUR MOUTH
00:12:16.33\00:12:21.20
SHUT WHILE YOUR SPOUSE IS
POURING HER HEART OUT OR I'M
00:12:21.20\00:12:26.11
POURING MY HEART OUT,
AND MAKES THAT EYE CONTACT.
00:12:26.11\00:12:29.68
YOU'RE REMEMBERING. IS
BEING SAID IS STARTING TO BE
00:12:29.68\00:12:38.75
STORED. OR BELITTLE IT.
00:12:38.75\00:12:47.46
LISTEN WITH YOUR
MOUTH, HOW? >> KEEP IT SHUT.
00:12:47.46\00:12:50.60
>> KEEP IT SHUT. >> MM-HMM.
00:12:50.60\00:12:56.24
THAT TAKES TASKS. >>
SOMETIMES WOMEN JUST WANT TO
00:12:56.24\00:12:59.24
TALK, TALK, TALK,
REALLY. I KNOW A LOT OF WOMEN.
00:12:59.24\00:13:02.44
THEY JUST WANT
TO MAKE THEIR POINT.
00:13:02.44\00:13:06.25
SHUT SOMETIMES. LISTEN.
00:13:06.25\00:13:11.22
>> LISTEN WITH
YOUR NECK. >> OH, OKAY.
00:13:11.22\00:13:13.29
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
LISTEN WITH YOUR EYES.
00:13:13.29\00:13:16.59
LISTEN WITH YOUR
MOUTH. LISTEN WITH YOUR NECK.
00:13:16.59\00:13:20.33
>> KEEP YOUR NECK
STILL. SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE--
00:13:20.33\00:13:23.90
>> THE NECK IS WANDERING.
>> OH, YEAH, WHATEVER.
00:13:23.90\00:13:34.81
>> DISINTERESTED, I DON'T WANT
PLEASE TAKE A LONG WALK ON A
00:13:34.81\00:13:40.05
SHORT PIER, THAT SORT OF
THING. IT'S CALLED NON-VERBAL
00:13:40.05\00:13:46.32
COMMUNICATION.
LISTEN WITH YOUR NECK.
00:13:46.32\00:13:59.37
EYES ARE MOVING, MOUTH
IS SHUT. YOU'RE ENGAGED.
00:13:59.37\00:14:03.57
THAT'S SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE
COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR NECK, WITH
00:14:03.57\00:14:09.88
YOUR EYES, AND WITH YOUR MOUTH.
WE SHARE THIS, AND I WANT TO
00:14:09.88\00:14:16.08
SHARE MY WIFE'S ONLY THING.
THERE ARE TWO TYPES OF LISTENERS
00:14:16.08\00:14:19.62
AND THERE ARE TWO
TYPES OF COMMUNICATORS.
00:14:19.62\00:14:26.06
COMMUNICATION
THROUGH OUR SPOUSE'S EYES.
00:14:26.06\00:14:32.00
>> ECOCENTRIC.
LISTENING THROUGH OUR EYES.
00:14:32.00\00:14:35.14
EMPATHETIC. I FEEL
WHAT YOU'RE SAYING.
00:14:35.14\00:14:39.31
>> YES. BUT YOU
DON'T SEE MY PART.
00:14:39.31\00:14:44.78
YOU DON'T
UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M SAYING.
00:14:44.78\00:14:53.19
TRYING TO MAKE YOURSELF
LOOK GOOD, THE EGOCENTRIC
00:14:53.19\00:14:57.16
COMMUNICATOR.
DEFENDING RATHER THAN MENDING.
00:14:57.16\00:15:03.30
>> YES, THAT'S
GOOD. >> A BIG DIFFERENCE.
00:15:03.30\00:15:05.43
BIG DIFFERENCE. >>
LISTEN WITH YOUR HANDS.
00:15:05.43\00:15:11.97
>> HOW DO YOU DO THAT?
>> KEEP YOUR HANDS STILL.
00:15:11.97\00:15:17.95
>> OKAY. >> ALMOST
LIKE THEY'RE BORED.
00:15:17.95\00:15:25.95
GET IT OVER WITH. >> HURRY UP.
00:15:25.95\00:15:31.06
>> EXACTLY. HANDS.
00:15:31.06\00:15:38.13
COMMUNICATION
IS AN ENTIRE THING.
00:15:38.13\00:15:42.84
COMMUNICATION. SPOKE
TONIGHT, DID YOU NOTICE
00:15:42.84\00:15:48.11
HOW HE WAS
FIDGETING WITH HIS HANDS.
00:15:48.11\00:15:54.85
PERSON WAS SAYING. HE
WAS TOTALLY HE'S INTERESTED.
00:15:54.85\00:15:59.05
BUT WHEN--HE WAS
TOTALLY DISINTERESTED.
00:15:59.05\00:16:07.60
FOCUSED. IN.
00:16:07.60\00:16:16.34
>> MM-HMM. IT SAYS TO HER.
00:16:16.34\00:16:19.67
>> I HAVE HIS
UNDIVIDED ATTENTION.
00:16:19.67\00:16:25.25
YOUR WIFE COULD SHINE IF
YOU GIVE HER YOUR UNDIVIDED
00:16:25.25\00:16:33.36
ATTENTION. >> ABSOLUTELY.
00:16:33.36\00:16:39.19
GREATEST GIFTS THAT
GREG HAS GIVEN TO ME.
00:16:39.19\00:16:41.96
HE'S A FABULOUS LISTENER. >> OH.
00:16:41.96\00:16:46.20
DO THAT. MARRIED
AND HE'LL ALWAYS SAY,
00:16:46.20\00:16:51.57
JILLY, WHEN I'M DONE, HE'LL SAY,
JILLY, NOW IS THIS THE TIME THAT
00:16:51.57\00:16:56.38
I JUST WAT YOU JUST
WANT ME TO HOLD YOU?
00:16:56.38\00:17:02.38
ARE YOU LOOKING FOR
ADVICE OR SOLUTIONS?
00:17:02.38\00:17:06.25
BECAUSE YOU KNOW MEN
ARE SOLUTION-FOCUSED.
00:17:06.25\00:17:10.39
HE'LL THINK I NEED TO
FIX THIS, I NEED TO HELP HER.
00:17:10.39\00:17:13.96
SO HE'LL SAY IS THIS A TIME
TO HOLD YOU OR GIVE YO SOMETHING
00:17:13.96\00:17:17.60
BACK? >> AMEN.
00:17:17.60\00:17:21.97
THAT'S BEAUTIFUL. WHEN
GO TO YOUR HUSBAND, AND YOU
00:17:21.97\00:17:27.94
FEEL SO EMPTY, YOU SAY TO
HIM, MY LOVE CUP IS EMPTY.
00:17:27.94\00:17:33.15
I'VE DONE THAT. I'LL
SAY MY LOVE CUP IS EMPTY
00:17:33.15\00:17:37.92
AND I NEED A HUG AND HE'LL GIVE
ME A HUG AND THEN I'LL GO BACK
00:17:37.92\00:17:44.39
TO COOKING. >> WE DO THAT.
00:17:44.39\00:17:47.50
TO FIND A WAY TO
SLOW THIS CLOCK DOWN-
00:17:47.50\00:17:55.24
>> OH, YES. >> OH?
00:17:55.24\00:17:58.47
>> LET ME GIVE YOU AN
EXAMPLE. [ CHUCKLING ]
00:17:58.47\00:18:06.31
ARE YOU DONE DOING THIS ALREADY?
A LOT OF PEOPLE DO THAT.
00:18:06.31\00:18:12.59
THEY DON'T
LISTEN WITH YOUR BACK.
00:18:12.59\00:18:16.79
EYES, MOUTH SHUT, POSITION,
NECK, SITTING STRAIGHT UP.
00:18:16.79\00:18:20.90
THEY'RE REALLY LISTENING TO ME.
THE OTHER ONE, LISTEN WITH YOUR
00:18:20.90\00:18:27.47
FEET. LISTEN FOR
FEELINGS AND FACTS.
00:18:27.47\00:18:44.19
I HAD TO LEARN THAT
FEELING REALLY DO MATTER.
00:18:44.19\00:18:57.53
MEN WOULD SAY, MY WIFE PLAYS
ON ME THROUGH HER FEELINGS.
00:18:57.53\00:19:01.80
THROUGH THE YEARS THAT MADE ME
THINK OF FEELINGS DIFFERENTLY.
00:19:01.80\00:19:05.34
BUT I HAD TO SAY WAIT A MINUTE.
FEELINGS DO REALLY MATTER.
00:19:05.34\00:19:09.14
WIVES WILL COMMUNICATE
THEIR FEELINGS EMOTIONALLY.
00:19:09.14\00:19:12.38
AND NOT ALL WOMEN WHO
COMMUNICATE EMOTIONALLY ARE
00:19:12.38\00:19:15.95
TRYING TO MANIPULATE.
THEY'LL SAY, YEAH, YOU'RE CRYING
00:19:15.95\00:19:21.46
BECAUSE YOU WANT TO
GET ME TO DO SOMETHING.
00:19:21.46\00:19:26.39
IT SHUTS YOUR SPOUSE
DOWN. I LEARNED THAT.
00:19:26.39\00:19:30.27
>> YES, YOU HAVE.
>> AND I LOVE YOU, TOO.
00:19:30.27\00:19:38.51
>> SHOULD WE DO A FEW QUESTIONS?
>> THIS ONE SAYS IS IT OKAY TO
00:19:38.51\00:19:43.55
MARRY MY EX-WIFE AFTER 40
YEARS? >> WHAT DO YOU THINK?
00:19:43.55\00:19:46.01
>> ABSOLUTELY. THAT
THEY WERE DIVORCED FOR 20
00:19:46.01\00:19:51.89
YEARS. >> WOW.
00:19:51.89\00:19:55.26
THE CHILDREN. SHE NEVER MARRIED.
00:19:55.26\00:20:00.13
HE NEVER MARRIED--REMARRIED.
AND THEY GOT BACK TOGETHER AFTER
00:20:00.13\00:20:05.50
20 YEARS. NOW.
00:20:05.50\00:20:09.64
AND SO IT'S OKAY TO
GET BACK WITH YOUR SPOUSE.
00:20:09.64\00:20:15.31
>> MM-HMM. >> A LONG TIME.
00:20:15.31\00:20:19.25
>> I WAS LISTENING TO A
COMEDIAN NOT TOO LONG AGO.
00:20:19.25\00:20:22.12
HE WAS SAYING, THIS IS FUNNY.
HE SAID WHEN YOU'VE BEEN MARRIED
00:20:22.12\00:20:26.25
FOR THAT LONG, HE SAID YOU BOTH
HAVE TRAINED EACH OTHER SO WELL
00:20:26.25\00:20:30.26
NOBODY ELSE WANTS YOU.
THEN YOU HAVE TO GO BACK TO EACH
00:20:30.26\00:20:35.10
OTHER. THIS SENSE.
00:20:35.10\00:20:41.14
I FINISH HER
SENTENCES. SHE FINISHES MINE.
00:20:41.14\00:20:45.37
NOW I  A THOUGHT COMES TO
MY MIND AND SHE MENTIONS IT.
00:20:45.37\00:20:52.55
>> THAT HAPPENS OFTEN.
WE'RE ON THE SAME TRACK.
00:20:52.55\00:20:55.92
>> I'VE TESTED THIS. I'LL
BE THINKING OR VERBALIZING
00:20:55.92\00:20:59.79
SOMETHING AND I'LL WONDER IF
SHE'S THINKING THE SAME THING.
00:20:59.79\00:21:02.99
SOMETIMES I DON'T EVEN
GET A CHANCE TO ASK HER.
00:21:02.99\00:21:05.63
SHE'LL COME OUT
WITH THE SAME THING.
00:21:05.63\00:21:10.93
TO ASK THIS QUESTION,
AND THEN HE'LL ASK IT.
00:21:10.93\00:21:14.07
>> THAT HAPPENED TO US EARLIER.
>> YOU GUYS ARE MOVNG IN THE
00:21:14.07\00:21:16.74
RIGHT DIRECTION. WHEN
I SOMETIMES HESITATE A
00:21:16.74\00:21:23.01
THOUGHT, SHE'LL SAY
IT, LIKE A MINUTE LATER.
00:21:23.01\00:21:28.68
>> SURE. HOW LONG
MUST ONE DATE BEFORE
00:21:28.68\00:21:34.39
GETTING MARRIED?
YEARS TO KNOW SOMEONE WELL.
00:21:34.39\00:21:38.66
THEN AGAIN SOME JUST DATE
FOR SIX MONTHS AND MARRY AND IT
00:21:38.66\00:21:41.83
WORKS OUT BY GOD'S GRACE.
ONE COULD DATE FOR YEARS AND
00:21:41.83\00:21:45.40
STILL DON'T GET TO KNOW THEIR
PARTNER UNTIL THEY MARRY AND
00:21:45.40\00:21:49.50
LIVE TOGETHER, AND THEN YOU
SEE SOME UNDESIRABLE BEHAVIOR
00:21:49.50\00:21:55.81
REVEALED AND YOU
THINK YOU MADE A MISTAKE.
00:21:55.81\00:21:59.35
YOU BE SURE THAT YOU'RE MARRYING
THE ONE THAT GOD HAS CHOSEN FOR
00:21:59.35\00:22:03.05
YOU. FARING THE
ONE GOD HAS FOR YOU.
00:22:03.05\00:22:07.72
I THANK YOU FOR COVERING THIS
TOPIC, BEING REA AND USING YOUR
00:22:07.72\00:22:12.53
RELATIONSHIP TO DEMONSTRATE
GOD'S LOVE AND MERCY.
00:22:12.53\00:22:15.86
IT'S REALLY NEEDED. >>
I'M GOING TO HAVE THIS QUOTE
00:22:15.86\00:22:23.30
READ AFTER I SAY THIS.
MARRIAGE IS NOT A MISTAKE.
00:22:23.30\00:22:26.84
BUT MARRIAGE WITHOUT GOD'S
GUIDANCE IS A TERRIBLE MAKE.
00:22:26.84\00:22:31.55
FIRST, GOD SAYS
DON'T MARRY A NON-BELIEVER.
00:22:31.55\00:22:38.22
MY WIFE HAS SOMETHING TO SAY
ABOUT THE UNBELIEVER THING WHICH
00:22:38.22\00:22:41.79
IS VERY INSIGHT FORTUNATELYFUL
WHICH THE LORD GAVE TO HER AND
00:22:41.79\00:22:49.13
NOT TO ME. >> YOU CAN BE IN THE
SAME PLACE BUT STILL DIVIDED.
00:22:49.13\00:22:53.97
LORD. YOU LOVE
THE LORD YOUR SPOUSE
00:22:53.97\00:22:58.81
WILL LOVE YOU OR EACH
OTHER, BUT IT HAS TO BE MUTUAL.
00:22:58.81\00:23:02.84
YOU HAVE TO LOVE THE LORD
IN ORDER TO REALLY HAVE A SOLID
00:23:02.84\00:23:06.45
RELATIONSHIP
BECAUSE GOD IS, WHAT, LOVE.
00:23:06.45\00:23:10.55
HE IS LOVE. BUT THIS
IS FROM A MINISTRY OF
00:23:10.55\00:23:13.72
HEALING, AND IT'S
REALLY SHORT. PAGE 360.
00:23:13.72\00:23:17.83
IT SAYS THROUGH
DIFFICULTIES PERPLEXITIES AND
00:23:17.83\00:23:24.53
DISCOURAGEMENTS, THOUGH
DIFFICULTIES, PERPLEXITIES MAY
00:23:24.53\00:23:29.44
ARISE, LET NEITHER HUSBAND
NOR WIFE HARBOR THE THOUGHT THAT
00:23:29.44\00:23:32.71
THEIR UNION IS A
MISTAKE OR A DISAPPOINTMENT.
00:23:32.71\00:23:39.01
POSSIBLE TO BE TO EACH OTHER.
CONTINUE THE EARLY ATTENTIONS IN
00:23:39.01\00:23:46.52
EVERY WAY, ENCOURAGE EACH OTHER
IN FIGHTING THE BATTLES OF LIFE.
00:23:46.52\00:23:51.99
STUDY TO ADVANCE THE
HAPPINESS OF EACH OTHER.
00:23:51.99\00:23:56.63
MEN MARRIAGE, INSTEAD OF BEING
THE END OF LOVE WILL BE AS IT IS
00:23:56.63\00:24:01.34
WORTH THE VERY
BEGINNING OF LOVE.
00:24:01.34\00:24:05.17
>> AMEN. BECAUSE
IF YOU LIVED JUST--IF
00:24:05.17\00:24:08.98
YOUR MARRIAGE IS JUST TO MAKE
YOU SATISFIED, THAT'S ONE SIDED.
00:24:08.98\00:24:12.55
>> THAT'S TRUE. HAPPY.
00:24:12.55\00:24:18.12
ME HAPPY AND WE
DISCOVERED THAT WE'RE HAPPY.
00:24:18.12\00:24:22.02
WE DON'T AGREE ON
EVERYTHING STILL, BUT WE STILL
00:24:22.02\00:24:25.96
UNDERSTAND--THIS IS A DANGEROUS
PHRASE, I'VE HEARD A LOT OF GUYS
00:24:25.96\00:24:30.07
USE IT. HAPPY WIVES, HAPPY LIFE.
00:24:30.07\00:24:34.44
IF THE WIFE IS
HAPPY EVERYBODY IS HAPPY.
00:24:34.44\00:24:37.17
THAT'S A DANGEROUS PHRASE
BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE GIVE UP
00:24:37.17\00:24:40.84
INDIVIDUALITY BECAUSE THE OTHER
PERSON BECOMES ANGRY IF THEY
00:24:40.84\00:24:44.61
DON'T GET THEIR WAY. IF
YOU SAY UNHEAVY WIFE, UNHAPPY
00:24:44.61\00:24:49.48
LIFE, THAT'S AN
UNBALANCED RELATIONSHIP.
00:24:49.48\00:24:56.26
LET ME ANSWER THE QUESTION.
IT DEPENDS ON HOW OLD YOU ARE.
00:24:56.26\00:24:59.69
>> THAT'S TRUE. >>
THAT'S A BIG QUESTION.
00:24:59.69\00:25:03.16
IF YOU'RE 16, YOU CAN DO WHAT
WE DID, DATE FOR NINE YEARS.
00:25:03.16\00:25:08.47
ESPECIALLY IN THIS GENERATION
BECAUSE TODAY THIS IS VERY
00:25:08.47\00:25:12.41
CORRUPT GENERATION.
ISSUES THAT YOU COULD BE SETTING
00:25:12.41\00:25:16.41
YOURSELF UP FOR SO MANY
DANGEROUS PLACES THAT YOU
00:25:16.41\00:25:19.61
SHOULDN'T GO.
PERSON YOU HAVE MET IS THE
00:25:19.61\00:25:23.89
PERSON YOU'RE INTERESTED
IN, GET GODLY COUNSEL.
00:25:23.89\00:25:29.69
LET THE BIBLE BE YOUR GUIDE, AND
DON'T PARTICIPATE IN ACTIVITY
00:25:29.69\00:25:33.36
THAT'S RESERVED FOR
MARRIAGE. >> THAT'S RIGHT.
00:25:33.36\00:25:37.13
DON'T LIVE TOGETHER
EITHER. >> DON'T LIVE TOGETHER.
00:25:37.13\00:25:39.30
SOMEONE ONCE SAID TO ME, HOW DO
I KNOW THAT IT'S GOING TO WORK
00:25:39.30\00:25:43.30
IF WE DON'T LIVE TOGETHER?
WELL, THE LORD WILL BLESS YOU
00:25:43.30\00:25:48.34
WHEN YOU ARE MARRIED.
YOU WON'T BE TUMBLING BECAUSE
00:25:48.34\00:25:51.41
HE'LL POUR BLESSINGS IN TO THAT
RELATIONSHIP THAT YOU WON'T FIND
00:25:51.41\00:25:56.22
IF YOU'RE LIVING TOGETHER.
IF YOU'RE OLDER, YOU'RE 50, YOUR
00:25:56.22\00:26:01.32
SPOUSE HAS PASSED AWAY.
WE KNOW SOMEONE WHO MARRIED
00:26:01.32\00:26:04.43
RECENTLY, HOW LONG
DID THEY KNOW EACH OTHER?
00:26:04.43\00:26:09.20
BUT THEY'RE
OLDER PEOPLE. >> SURE.
00:26:09.20\00:26:14.27
YEARS BECAUSE ONE
OF THEM MIGHT BE DEAD.
00:26:14.27\00:26:16.84
LET'S BE
RESPECTFUL ABOUT IT. >> YES.
00:26:16.84\00:26:21.34
IN YOUR 30s, DON'T
RUSH. BUT DO GET COUNSELING
00:26:21.34\00:26:26.38
BEFOREHAND. NEEDS
COUNSELING BEFOREHAND IS
00:26:26.38\00:26:30.82
YOU'LL FIND OUT WHAT A MARRIAGE
IS MADE OF, AND SOMETIMES
00:26:30.82\00:26:36.09
MARRIAGE REQUIRES SOMETHING AND
THERE ARE SO MANY COMPONENTS TO
00:26:36.09\00:26:41.83
MARRIAGE THAT UNLESS YOU SEE
IN A MARRIAGE COUNSELING HOW YOU
00:26:41.83\00:26:45.27
DEAL WITH CONFLICT RESOLUTION.
YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS MONEY,
00:26:45.27\00:26:49.44
CHILDREN, PARENTING, THE ROLE
OF THE HUSBAND, THE ROLE OF THE
00:26:49.44\00:26:52.94
WIFE, WHAT KIND OF PERSON--ARE
YOU CONNECTED, DISCONNECTED,
00:26:52.94\00:26:56.58
OVERLY CONNECTED. DID
YOU COME FROM A FAMILY WHERE
00:26:56.58\00:26:59.75
EVERYBODY MADE THE DECISION OR
ONE PERSON MADE THE DECISION FOR
00:26:59.75\00:27:04.25
EVERYONE. SEE HOW
YOU'RE GOING TO MESH AND
00:27:04.25\00:27:08.06
THEN YOU CAN DETERMINE IF
YOU'RE READY FOR MARRIAGE.
00:27:08.06\00:27:11.53
YOU'RE READY FOR MARRIAGE, THEN
COURT WITH MARRIAGE IN MIND.
00:27:11.53\00:27:15.70
OBVIOUSLY THAT'S NOT
HOW IT WORKED FOR ME.
00:27:15.70\00:27:21.27
FIRST HOUR SAID THAT I
WAS DATING HER TOO LONG.
00:27:21.27\00:27:23.47
HE GAVE ME AN ULTIMATUM.
HE SAID HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING
00:27:23.47\00:27:28.24
TO DATE HER? ARE
YOU GOING TO MARRY HER?
00:27:28.24\00:27:32.65
YES, WHEN? >>
WE'RE GETTING A LOT.
00:27:32.65\00:27:37.92
>> THERE IS A LITTLE
TEASE. THERE IS ONE WHO HAS BEEN
00:27:37.92\00:27:41.89
MARRIED FO 68 YEARS.
>> THIS IS FROM INDIANA.
00:27:41.89\00:27:49.86
THIS IS AFTER TALKING
ABOUT EPHESIANS 5, THIS IS FROM
00:27:49.86\00:27:53.64
EPHESIANS 6, NOT RELATING
SPECIFICALLY TO MARRIAGE BUT IT
00:27:53.64\00:27:57.37
IS TO FAMILY. IF
YOU HAVE MEMBERS IN YOUR
00:27:57.37\00:28:00.44
FAMILY, PARENTS SPECIFICALLY,
AND THERE IS ADDICTION, ABUSE OR
00:28:00.44\00:28:05.68
NEGLECT OF THE
CHILDREN, DO THE PARENTS.
00:28:05.68\00:28:12.89
PARENTS IN THE LORD.
WHEN A PARENT IS LEADING YOU
00:28:12.89\00:28:17.06
DOWN A PATH THAT IS UNGODLY,
THE BIBLE DOESN'T REQUIRE
00:28:17.06\00:28:21.13
YOU--ESPECIALLY NOW I'M SPEAKING
TO PEOPLE WHO ARE OF AGE.
00:28:21.13\00:28:27.47
SOMETIMES A MINOR CANNOT
DISAGREE WITH A PARTICIPANT, AND
00:28:27.47\00:28:30.54
THAT'S A DIFFICULT SITUATION.
WHEN A CHILD IS SUBJECT TO AN
00:28:30.54\00:28:33.98
ABUSIVE HOME, THE FATHER IS A
DRINKER, DRUG ABUSER OR THERE IS
00:28:33.98\00:28:38.15
ARGUMENT IN THE HOUSES IT IS A
DIFFICULT SITUATION TO SAY TING
00:28:38.15\00:28:42.62
A 11-YEAR-OLD OR 12-YEAR-OLD
DISOBEY YOUR PARENTS BECAUSE
00:28:42.62\00:28:46.35
THEY MAY END UP WITHOUT A HOME.
BUT IF YOU'RE IN AN ABUSIVE
00:28:46.35\00:28:50.86
RELATIONSHIP, PHYSICAL ABUSE.
WE LISTEN     LIVE IN A DAY AND
00:28:50.86\00:28:56.80
AGE--SO MUCH IS GOING ON
IN MY MIND LIKE AN EXPLOSION.
00:28:56.80\00:28:59.90
SOMETIMES CHILDREN WILL SAY JUST
TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE, MY DAD
00:28:59.90\00:29:02.84
IS ABUSING ME AND IT'S
FALSE. >> AS A WAY TO GET OUT.
00:29:02.84\00:29:07.24
AND IF YOU DO THAT, YOU
COLD DESTROY YOUR FAMILY.
00:29:07.24\00:29:10.81
SOME FAMILIES WILL NEVER
RECOVER FROM A FALSE ACCUSATION.
00:29:10.81\00:29:14.52
THE COURTS WILL STEP IN, SNATCH
YOU OUT, AND YOU MAY SAY I'M
00:29:14.52\00:29:20.22
KIDDING. HIS
REPUTATION IS DESTROYED.
00:29:20.22\00:29:24.73
BUT IF YOU'RE IN AN ABUSIVE
SITUATION, LET SOMEONE KNOW.
00:29:24.73\00:29:31.00
TELL A FAMILY MEMBER, A TEACHER
PASTOR, BUT DON'T JUST TELL ALL
00:29:31.00\00:29:35.80
YOUR FRIENDS, BUT GET THE
ATTENTION OF SOMEONE WHO CAN
00:29:35.80\00:29:38.67
HELP YOU. DID I ANSWER THAT?
00:29:38.67\00:29:41.38
>> YES, DID YOU. >> ABSOLUTELY.
00:29:41.38\00:29:45.05
>> OKAY, YES SO THIS ONE HERE,
AND I THINK YOU HAVE ONE THAT IS
00:29:45.05\00:29:48.32
LONGER THAN THIS ONE BEING
MARRIED, I'M JUST GOING TO READ
00:29:48.32\00:29:52.02
THIS. IT'S TAKEN
BY ONE OF OUR CSRs
00:29:52.02\00:29:56.56
AT THE CALL CENTER. THEIR
NAMES ARE AVADEL AND DAVID
00:29:56.56\00:30:01.43
DAVIDSON. OF MARRIAGE.
00:30:01.43\00:30:10.34
[CLAPPING] THEY
NEVER LET THE DAY PASS
00:30:10.34\00:30:13.94
WITHOUT SAYING
THEY LOVE EACH OTHER.
00:30:13.94\00:30:19.11
REPEATEDLY TO EACH OTHER.
THEY NEVER GO TO SLEEP WITHOUT
00:30:19.11\00:30:23.05
SAYING IT. THEY'RE
BOTH 90 YEARS OLD NOW.
00:30:23.05\00:30:27.39
THEY WERE ONLY 21 YEARS
OLD WHEN THEY FOUND EACH OTHER.
00:30:27.39\00:30:30.29
WHAT A BLESSING. >> AMEN.
00:30:30.29\00:30:37.90
>> I JUST WANT TO SAY THIS, TOO.
WE HAVE A NUMBER HERE THAT ARE
00:30:37.90\00:30:41.27
LESS THAN 70, BUT BEFORE WE END
THE PROGRAM I THINK IT WOULD BE
00:30:41.27\00:30:44.97
GREAT TO MENTION THAT WE
HAVE SOME THAT ARE 54 YEARS, 51,
00:30:44.97\00:30:48.41
WE'LL MENTION YOUR NAME AS
WELL. >> ISN'T THAT BEAUTIFUL.
00:30:48.41\00:30:51.85
>> THAT IS BEAUTIFUL. MY
WIFE AND I HAVE TAKEN ON A
00:30:51.85\00:30:55.92
YEAR AGO. TURN THE
LIGHT OFF AND WE HUG TO
00:30:55.92\00:31:00.89
FALL ASLEEP, I SAY GOOD NIGHT,
HONEY, GOOD NIGHT, SWEETHEART, I
00:31:00.89\00:31:06.70
LOVE YOU, I LOVE
YOU, TOO. YOU KNOW WHAT?
00:31:06.70\00:31:10.53
ANYBODY. AND IT'S
THE REALITY OF LIFE.
00:31:10.53\00:31:13.47
>> THAT'S WHAT WE
DO AS WELL. I LOVE YOU.
00:31:13.47\00:31:16.47
BEAUTIFUL. THINK.
00:31:16.47\00:31:22.18
TIME FOR THE GIFT OF GLORY
DVD. WHEN WILL IT BE READY?
00:31:22.18\00:31:26.28
>> OH, THAT'S FANTASTIC.
>> DO YOU HAVE AN ANSWER FOR
00:31:26.28\00:31:30.12
THAT? OF AUGUST OR FIRST PAR OF
00:31:30.12\00:31:34.19
SEPTEMBER TO HAVE IT
HERE. WE ARE ALMOST THERE.
00:31:34.19\00:31:38.36
>> WE'RE ADDING BONUS FEATURES,
THE "GIVE IT   HIM GLORY"
00:31:38.36\00:31:49.44
CONCERT. WE'RE GIVING
BACK STORIES TO THE SONGS BEING
00:31:49.44\00:31:54.41
WRITTEN. WE'RE
ALMOST THERE. GOOD QUESTION.
00:31:54.41\00:31:59.11
ON THREE ANGELS
MESSAGES ARE AVAILABLE TONIGHT.
00:31:59.11\00:32:02.72
WELL. COMMENTS
AND REQUIRES REGARDING
00:32:02.72\00:32:08.96
MARRIAGE OR SHARING HOW
LONG YOU'VE BEEN MARRIED.
00:32:08.96\00:32:14.76
IT'S $25 SUGGESTED
DONATION. FILL FREE TO DO THAT.
00:32:14.76\00:32:18.87
618-627-4651. OR
YOU CAN ALWAYS E-MAIL US
00:32:18.87\00:32:24.87
LIVE@3ABN.TV. >>
THIS IS REALLY NEAT HERE.
00:32:24.87\00:32:28.54
THIS IS FROM BRIAN, AND HE'S
IN WASHINGTON, BASICALLY SAYS 15
00:32:28.54\00:32:34.42
YEARS MARRIED, 4 CHILDREN, I'M
40 YEARS OLD, AND I'M LDS MORE
00:32:34.42\00:32:40.26
MONDAY, BUT I  I LOVE YOUR
CHURCH, AND YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT
00:32:40.26\00:32:45.89
SUNDAY BEING WRONG. >> WHAT?
00:32:45.89\00:32:49.73
CONGRATULATIONS AS WELL. >> WOW.
00:32:49.73\00:32:53.70
>> RAISED IN THE TRUTH OF THE
GOD'S WORD AND ADMONITION OF THE
00:32:53.70\00:32:59.67
LORD. YEARS.
00:32:59.67\00:33:14.42
>> MARRIED 78 YEARS.
>> ALMOST 80 YEARS--WOW.
00:33:14.42\00:33:17.26
THAT'S AMAZING.
>> LET'S SEE HERE, .
00:33:17.26\00:33:23.10
>> LET ME SAYING
IS HERE. >> PLEASE DO.
00:33:23.10\00:33:27.20
COVER. BUT
SPENDING--DURING CONFLICT,
00:33:27.20\00:33:34.14
WAYS TO KEEP
RELATIONSHIPS GOING.
00:33:34.14\00:33:39.01
>> YOU KNOW, WAYS TO
KEEP RELATIONSHIPS GROWING.
00:33:39.01\00:33:43.69
SPEND QUANTITY AND
QUALITY TIME TOGETHER.
00:33:43.69\00:33:48.39
>> YEAH, WE TRAVEL TOGETHER.
>> YOU HEAR ABOUT QUANTITY TIME,
00:33:48.39\00:33:53.60
BUT YOU USED
ANOTHER WORD, TOO, QUALITY.
00:33:53.60\00:34:00.17
HERE AT ABN. IF YOU
THINK IT'S NOT BUSY, THEN
00:34:00.17\00:34:03.77
COME TO THE WEEK. WE
DON'T KNOW WHAT WE HAVE GOING
00:34:03.77\00:34:06.37
ON UNTIL WE TAKE
ALL OUR HATS OFF.
00:34:06.37\00:34:11.18
TOGETHER. YEARS AGO.
00:34:11.18\00:34:17.82
WITH ME. I SAID I
WOULD RATHER TAKE THE
00:34:17.82\00:34:22.36
FINANCIAL IMPACT
THAN RELATIONAL IMPACT.
00:34:22.36\00:34:26.83
WORLD. PAY FOR
YOUR WIFE TO COME, WHAT
00:34:26.83\00:34:33.23
IS SHE GOING TO DO? >>
I NEED SOMEONE TO KEEP ME
00:34:33.23\00:34:37.41
SANE. ROOM, AT
THE CONVENTION WHEN WE
00:34:37.41\00:34:44.41
DID A SERIES ONCE--I FORGOT--I
CAN'T REMEMBER THE COUNTRY, BUT
00:34:44.41\00:34:49.82
WE DID IT ON RELATIONSHIP.
THE PEOPLE SAID IT WASN'T WHAT
00:34:49.82\00:34:54.19
YOU SAID THAT IMPRESSED US.
I LOVED HOW YOU LOOKED AT YOUR
00:34:54.19\00:34:59.73
WIFE. I LOOKED AT
YOUR SPOUSE TO SEE
00:34:59.73\00:35:05.03
IF WHAT YOU SAID REALLY MATTERS.
>> I WANT TO ADD TO THAT.
00:35:05.03\00:35:08.70
I THINK THAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT
BECAUSE YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT
00:35:08.70\00:35:11.14
WAYS OF A RELATIONSHIP GROWING
IN A MARRIAGE AND YOUR SPOUSE
00:35:11.14\00:35:14.31
COMING ALONG WITH
YOU, THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT.
00:35:14.31\00:35:19.91
COME TO YOU AND SAID PASTOR, I
NEED YOU TO SHARE THAT WITH YOU.
00:35:19.91\00:35:24.39
AND THEN YOU CAN
SAY, ANGIE COME OVER HERE.
00:35:24.39\00:35:28.32
HUSBAND IS NOT GOING
TO RUN OFF OVER HERE.
00:35:28.32\00:35:32.96
BUT ANGIE, COME OVER HERE.
THIS YOUNG LADY HAS SOMETHING
00:35:32.96\00:35:36.03
SHE NEEDS TO SHARE.
THAT'S IMPORTANT AND IT HELPS
00:35:36.03\00:35:39.17
THE FIDELITY ASPECT,
TOO. >> LET ME INCLUDE THAT.
00:35:39.17\00:35:44.97
THAT'S A SIGNIFICANT
ASPECT OF MAINTAINING FIDELITY.
00:35:44.97\00:35:49.01
AND WHEN YOU SURROUND YOURSELF
WITH SAFETY POINTS BECAUSE YES,
00:35:49.01\00:35:58.75
WE'VE BEEN ON THE ROAD.
PEOPLE WILL COME, THEY'RE
00:35:58.75\00:36:02.46
TRYING, AND GET   THEY GET
TO CRYING, AND WHAT DO I DO?
00:36:02.46\00:36:09.43
MY MARRIAGE IS--DON'T
SPEND QUANTITY PRIVATE TIME WITH
00:36:09.43\00:36:14.57
ANOTHER PERSON
OTHER THAN YOUR SPOUSE.
00:36:14.57\00:36:21.84
>> OH, IT'S GOING TO BE
OKAY. AND THEN WHAT HAPPENS?
00:36:21.84\00:36:29.72
THEN THE KNICKS THING YOU KNOW
THEY MIGHT MISINTERPRET THAT.
00:36:29.72\00:36:33.79
SO THE PRINCIPLES OF
FIDELITY THAT WE SURROUND OUR
00:36:33.79\00:36:37.33
RELATIONSHIP, POINT NUMBER TWO.
>> DON'T GET INVOLVED IN OTHER
00:36:37.33\00:36:41.33
PEOPLE'S PERSONAL
MATTERS ABOUT THEIR SPOUSE.
00:36:41.33\00:37:02.18
>> IF YOU'RE FEELING SORRY
FOR THE PERSON AND YOU ATTACH TO
00:37:02.18\00:37:05.12
THEM EMOTIONALLY,
YOU'RE BEING DRAWN IN.
00:37:05.12\00:37:09.49
LEADS TO AN AFFAR, AND
THEN IT'S WHAT HAPPENED?
00:37:09.49\00:37:13.56
JUST FROM LISTENING AND
YOU JUST HAVE TO BE CAREFUL.
00:37:13.56\00:37:16.46
>> I LIKE THE POINT YOU
BROUGHT UP ABOUT EMOTION.
00:37:16.46\00:37:19.57
EMOTIONAL, I BELIEVE THERE
IS MUCH MORE THAN A SEXUAL OR
00:37:19.57\00:37:22.74
GETTING INVOLVED
SEXUALLY IN AN AFFAIR.
00:37:22.74\00:37:26.88
AFFAIRS YOU CAN
HAVE WITH SOMEONE.
00:37:26.88\00:37:30.25
EMOTIONALLY YOU CAN GET INVOLVED
WITH SOMEONE AND NOT REALIZE IT,
00:37:30.25\00:37:33.25
AND YOU'RE BECOMING UNFAITHFUL
TO YOUR SPOUSE EVEN THOUGH YOU
00:37:33.25\00:37:36.35
MAY NOT BE INVOLVED
SEXUALLY. >> EMOTIONS STARTED.
00:37:36.35\00:37:41.59
>> THAT'S CORRECT. >>
THERE IS A SONG FEELINGS CAN
00:37:41.59\00:37:48.56
OFTEN BE BETRAYED BY EMOTION.
THE OTHER ONE WE PUT IN,
00:37:48.56\00:37:55.80
RECOGNIZE FEELINGS
WHEN THEY BEGIN TO ARISE.
00:37:55.80\00:37:59.67
COMMUNICATION BRINGS OUT A
FEELING OF EMPATHY--I HAD A LADY
00:37:59.67\00:38:05.65
ONCE SAY TO ME, I WISH MY
HUSBAND WAS JUST LIKE YOU.
00:38:05.65\00:38:10.25
BUT NOW SHE WAS WAY OLDER LADY.
AND THIS ONE LADY AT OUR CHURCH,
00:38:10.25\00:38:14.76
SHE WAS WAY OLDER, SHE ONCE TOLD
MY WIFE AT FELLOWSHIP LUNCH.
00:38:14.76\00:38:18.69
>> SHE SAID IF I WAS YOUNGER
I WOULD GIVE YOU A RUN FOR YOUR
00:38:18.69\00:38:22.90
HUSBAND. >> YEAH, LATE 70s.
00:38:22.90\00:38:31.44
>> BUT SHE VOICED IT.
WHEN YOU MEET PEOPLE THAT YOU
00:38:31.44\00:38:34.14
DON'T KNOW, EVEN LIMIT THE KIND
OF TOUCHY-FEELY KIND OF THING.
00:38:34.14\00:38:39.61
PEOPLE MAY SAY, THEY WANT TO
HUG YOU, YOU DON'T KNOW WHO THEY
00:38:39.61\00:38:43.79
ARE, THEY WANT TO KISS
YOU ON THE CHEEK--I'M A VERY
00:38:43.79\00:38:47.69
AFFECTIONATE PERSON, IN NEW YORK
WE--BUT WE'RE LEARNING TO SHAKE
00:38:47.69\00:38:53.43
A HAND AND NOT TO ASSUME.
I WAS AT A CAMP MEETING AND A
00:38:53.43\00:38:58.93
LADY SAID, I'M NOT A
HANDSHAKER, JUST GIVE ME A HUG.
00:38:58.93\00:39:02.97
SHE WAS AN OLDER WOMAN, BUT
LIMIT THOSE AND UNDERSTAND THE
00:39:02.97\00:39:06.27
PLACE WHERE THEY SHOULD
ARRIVE AND SHOULD NOT ARISE.
00:39:06.27\00:39:11.41
NUMBER FOUR. ANYONE
OTHER THAN YOUR SPOUSE.
00:39:11.41\00:39:16.65
>> THAT'S GOOD. LINES.
00:39:16.65\00:39:20.36
>> SAME LINES. >> BE
OPEN WITH EACH OTHER ABOUT
00:39:20.36\00:39:26.63
UNDUE ATTENTION FROM
OTHERS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX.
00:39:26.63\00:39:31.73
I WAS AWAY, AND
THIS IS VERY GOOD.
00:39:31.73\00:39:36.10
EVERYWHERE. I WAS
WITH PASTOR FINLEY, AND
00:39:36.10\00:39:42.54
WAITING AT THE AIRPORT
FOR SOMEBODY TO PICK ME UP.
00:39:42.54\00:39:45.25
THERE WAS A LADY WAITING
FOR SOMEONE TO PICK HER UP.
00:39:45.25\00:39:48.65
SHE SAID, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WHAT HOTEL ARE YOU STAYING AT?
00:39:48.65\00:39:56.19
SHE SAID IF MY RIDE COMES FIRST,
DO YOU WANT ME TO GIVE A RIDE?
00:39:56.19\00:40:01.16
I SAID NO, I'LL WAIT. TO
MY SHOCK TWO DAYS LATER I GET
00:40:01.16\00:40:06.57
A PHONE CALL. BUT
IT'S THIS WOMAN CALLING ME.
00:40:06.57\00:40:11.31
I SAID HELLO? WHO IS THIS?
00:40:11.31\00:40:13.44
DO YOU REMEMBER,
WE MET IN THE AIRPORT.
00:40:13.44\00:40:18.15
I VISIT THIS AREA SO OFTEN,
THERE ARE ONLY SO MANY HOTELS
00:40:18.15\00:40:23.25
LIKE THAT. WELL, CAN WE TALK?
00:40:23.25\00:40:27.12
I'M LEAVING--NO,
NO, WE CAN'T. NO.
00:40:27.12\00:40:34.66
YOU WOULD NOT
BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED.
00:40:34.66\00:40:38.20
>> IMMEDIATELY.
FOR NOW ON YOU'RE GOING
00:40:38.20\00:40:42.80
EVERYWHERE WITH ME. >>
HE ALWAYS TELLS ME WHENEVER
00:40:42.80\00:40:45.21
THAT HAPPENS. >>
THAT'S CALLED OPENNESS AND
00:40:45.21\00:40:49.84
TRANSPARENCY IN THE MARRIAGE.
IF THERE IS ANY OUTSIDE FORCE,
00:40:49.84\00:40:55.68
IT'S BETTER TO BE OPEN. >>
AND COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE,
00:40:55.68\00:40:59.22
COMMUNICATE. FROM
THIS SURPRISE CALL, YOU
00:40:59.22\00:41:05.43
CALL YOUR WIFE. YOU
WOULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT
00:41:05.43\00:41:07.83
HAPPENED. THE YEARS
RECALIBRATED THROUGH
00:41:07.83\00:41:14.87
THE YEARS. THIS
IS KIND OF FUNNY.
00:41:14.87\00:41:20.34
MY WIFE HAS A PERSONALITY
THAT PEOPLE LOVE TO TALK TO HER.
00:41:20.34\00:41:24.05
AND SHE'S SUCH A LISTENER
THAT GUYS LIKE TO TALK TO HER.
00:41:24.05\00:41:27.82
BUT SHE KNOWS HER BOUNDARIES.
SHE KNOWS HER PERIMETERS.
00:41:27.82\00:41:34.49
THAT'S IMPORTANT FOR A MARRIAGE
TO BE SUCCESSFUL OVER THE YEARS.
00:41:34.49\00:41:36.86
>> OH, YES. >> AND
THIS CLOCK HAS GONE SO
00:41:36.86\00:41:41.00
FAST, JILL AND GREG.
THIS IS SOMETHING ABOUT--DID
00:41:41.00\00:41:47.74
WE--OH, DID WE TALK ABOUT--WE
DIDN'T TALK ABOUT HOW TO KEEP
00:41:47.74\00:41:51.57
OUR RELATIONSHIP
GROWING. TRAVELING.
00:41:51.57\00:41:58.38
KEEPING OUR
RELATIONSHIP QUESTIONS, TOO.
00:41:58.38\00:42:02.35
>> TRAVEL
TOGETHER, VACATION TOGETHER.
00:42:02.35\00:42:06.35
DURING THE WEEK FOR
EACH OTHER. A DATE NIGHT.
00:42:06.35\00:42:10.13
AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE
HAVE THAT HERE, DATE NIGHT.
00:42:10.13\00:42:12.96
IT'S USUALLY THURSDAYS. >>
YOU'RE DATING HERE ON THE SET
00:42:12.96\00:42:16.80
HERE ON LIVE TV. >>
OUR DATE IS LIVE TV.
00:42:16.80\00:42:20.74
>> PASTOR JOHN AND
ANGIE, THEY'RE ON DATE NIGHT.
00:42:20.74\00:42:25.61
>> THIS IS DATE
NIGHT. >> OR SUNDAYS.
00:42:25.61\00:42:32.68
>> YOU HAVE TO BE FLEXIBLE.
>> AND YOU DO THE SAME, DON'T
00:42:32.68\00:42:35.85
YOU. OUR
SCHEDULES, LIKE PASTOR JOHN
00:42:35.85\00:42:41.39
MENTIONED, YOU HAVE
TO BE BUT IT'S GOOD.
00:42:41.39\00:42:47.20
PUT MY CELL PHONE ASIDE, AND I
DON'T ANSWER, I DONT DO E-MAILS
00:42:47.20\00:42:51.43
OR TEXT. JUST "US" TIME.
00:42:51.43\00:42:56.10
AND THAT'S IMPORTANT.
WE PUT IT AWAY FROM US.
00:42:56.10\00:42:59.64
IF YOU HEAR IT YOUR PHONE AND
YOUR BODY IS SAYING ANSWER IT.
00:42:59.64\00:43:06.08
AND IT SEEMS LIKE ITS
GETTING LOUDER, BUT IT'S NOT.
00:43:06.08\00:43:09.72
WE JUST SHUT IT DOWN AND
TALK ABOUT EASY AND TOUGH
00:43:09.72\00:43:13.56
ISSUES. TOUGH
ISSUES IS SOMETIMES THE
00:43:13.56\00:43:18.99
HARDEST. THIS?
00:43:18.99\00:43:25.27
EVEN AS HARD AS IT IS TO
TALK ABOUT, WE DO IT, DON'T WE.
00:43:25.27\00:43:29.57
>> THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S
RIGHT. >> AND WE BURY IT IN EACH
00:43:29.57\00:43:33.51
OTHER'S HEART. AND NO
ONE WILL EVER KNOW WHAT
00:43:33.51\00:43:44.85
WE ARE WE TALKED ABOUT.
00:43:44.85\00:43:48.62
>> AND SOMETIMES YOU
PRAY ON HOW TO APPROACH IT.
00:43:48.62\00:43:51.13
YOU DON'T WANT TO PRAY--WE'VE
LEARNED THAT OKAY, WE ENTER THIS
00:43:51.13\00:43:56.73
TOPIC, WE'RE GOING TO EITHER
LOSE TOGETHER OR WIN TOGETHER IF
00:43:56.73\00:44:00.80
WE HANDLE IT CORRECTLY IF
WE TALK ABOUT TOUGH ISSUES.
00:44:00.80\00:44:05.31
WE DON'T ALLOW
OTHERS TO STEAL OUR TIME.
00:44:05.31\00:44:10.45
BUT SOMETIMES PEOPLE
WILL INSIST ON YOUR TIME.
00:44:10.45\00:44:13.15
BUT IF IT'S AN
EMERGENCY, AS A PASTOR--
00:44:13.15\00:44:17.52
>> WE DON'T HAVE OFFICE HOURS.
YOU CAN CALL ME ANY TIME THERE
00:44:17.52\00:44:20.12
IS AN EMERGENCY. BUT THERE
IS A LADY THAT WE USED USED TO
00:44:20.12\00:44:26.96
CALL AT 5:30 IN THE MORNING
TO SHARE BIBLE TEXT WITH ME.
00:44:26.96\00:44:30.80
I WOULD SAY IS
THIS AN EMERGENCY?
00:44:30.80\00:44:35.97
MAYBE LATER BECAUSE AT THAT TIME
OF THE MORNING I'M JUST TURNING
00:44:35.97\00:44:41.98
OVER. AS A PASTOR, AN I'VE HEARD
00:44:41.98\00:44:46.58
PEOPLE COMPLAIN ABOUT THIS.
YOU HEARD OF THE PASTOR'S KIDS.
00:44:46.58\00:44:51.25
THAT'S THE KEY ISSUE.
NOW WE DON'T HAVE CHILDREN.
00:44:51.25\00:44:54.19
WHAT DO WE HAVE? >> SHEEP.
00:44:54.19\00:44:59.03
>> THIS GOES ALONG WITH THE TIME
ASPECT, AND I KNOW THE ANSWER TO
00:44:59.03\00:45:02.93
THIS, BUT PASTOR JOHN LOMACANG,
DO YOU PUT GOD OR YOUR WIFE
00:45:02.93\00:45:11.81
FIRST IN YOUR
LIFE. I KNOW THE ANSWER.
00:45:11.81\00:45:15.64
>> GOD--THE MINISTER
ASKED ME THIS MANY YEARS AGO.
00:45:15.64\00:45:21.52
HE SAID, SIT DOWN, YOUNG MAN,
BEFORE I GOT MY FIRST CHURCH IN
00:45:21.52\00:45:25.42
SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA. HE
WOULD SAY YOUNG MAN, TELL ME
00:45:25.42\00:45:28.86
THE ORDER OF YOUR LIFE
IN THESE FIVE CATEGORIES.
00:45:28.86\00:45:32.46
I SAID GOD FIRST, MY WIFE
NEXT AND THE CHURCH AFTER THAT.
00:45:32.46\00:45:35.76
>> YES. BECAUSE I
CAME TO THE CHURCH
00:45:35.76\00:45:40.10
WITH MY WIFE. I'M
LEAVING THE CHURCH WITH MY
00:45:40.10\00:45:43.61
WIFE. MORNING IS
COMING AND SHE'S IN
00:45:43.61\00:45:50.31
THE HOSPITAL? I'LL BE
IN THE HOSPITAL BY HER
00:45:50.31\00:45:54.65
SIDE. WIFE HAS
BEEN THERE OH WITH ME.
00:45:54.65\00:46:00.66
I WANT TO BE THERE FOR HER.
>> SO MEANS TIMES YOU HEAR FROM
00:46:00.66\00:46:11.80
PASTORS. >> THE
CHURCH BEFORE THE WIFE.
00:46:11.80\00:46:14.44
>> AND THE CHILDREN? >>
THE CHILDREN DOWN THERE.
00:46:14.44\00:46:17.01
>> THE CHILDREN WILL SAY
HE SPENDS SO MUCH TIME FOR THE
00:46:17.01\00:46:19.14
CHURCH BUT NOT
WITH US. >> ANY MORE?
00:46:19.14\00:46:28.12
>> WE SHOULD HAVE A
PRAYER BEFORE WE CLOSE OUT.
00:46:28.12\00:46:30.29
WE HAVE 11 MINUTES LEFT.
>> WE'LL JUST DO RAPID FIRE.
00:46:30.29\00:46:36.26
ROBERT AND
DAISY, MARRIED 72 YEARS.
00:46:36.26\00:46:40.36
MARLEAU AND SHIRLEY
MARRIED 54 YEARS LAST MONTH.
00:46:40.36\00:46:44.03
THEY'RE FROM
MOSES LAKE, WASHINGTON.
00:46:44.03\00:46:46.84
AND. >> HONEY, WE'RE WAY BEHIND.
00:46:46.84\00:46:50.57
>> RICHARD AND DEBBY MARRIED
46 YEARS, AND SHE SAID, I ALWAYS
00:46:50.57\00:46:55.44
PRAYED THAT I WOULD FIND
A HUSBAND WHO WAS RELIGIOUS.
00:46:55.44\00:46:58.88
MY HUSBAND WAS THE
ANSWER TO MY PRAYERS.
00:46:58.88\00:47:05.19
TODAY, AND TODAY
IS HIS 90TH BIRTHDAY.
00:47:05.19\00:47:11.39
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FROM
3ABN AND HAPPY ANNIVERSARY.
00:47:11.39\00:47:17.00
NOT ONLY DO YOU HAVE TO GIVE
A GIFT TO THE PERSON MARRIED THE
00:47:17.00\00:47:21.20
LONGEST. >> HIRE
IS A COUPLE MARRIED 51
00:47:21.20\00:47:37.92
YEARS. FROM
EUROPE, 36 YEARS THEY'VE
00:47:37.92\00:47:46.49
BEEN MARRIED AND
GOD HAS BLESSED US.
00:47:46.49\00:47:51.87
EUROPE. THEY'RE
HERE IN THE STATES.
00:47:51.87\00:47:55.80
46 YEARS.
CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU ALL.
00:47:55.80\00:47:58.27
PRAY THE LORD. WHAT A TESTAMENT.
00:47:58.27\00:48:00.34
>> I HAVE A QUESTION HERE.
IT SAYS YOU SAID NOT TO TELL
00:48:00.34\00:48:04.51
OTHERS ABOUT
TROUBLE IN A MARRIAGE.
00:48:04.51\00:48:08.85
UNFAITHFUL? FAMILY,
FRIENDS OR A PASTOR?
00:48:08.85\00:48:13.32
>> START WITH YOUR
PASTOR AND A MARRIAGE COUNSELOR.
00:48:13.32\00:48:19.49
IN,
FAMILY--FAMILY IS ALWAYS BIASED.
00:48:19.49\00:48:27.10
BECAUSE WHAT HAPPENS IS WHEN YOU
RESOLVE THE ISSUE, YOU KNOW WHAT
00:48:27.10\00:48:30.47
HAPPENS? GIVE, YOU
PUT ON THE SHOULDER OF
00:48:30.47\00:48:35.11
INDIVIDUALS SOMETHING THAT
COUNSEL OR PASTOR OR SOMEONE WHO
00:48:35.11\00:48:39.55
CAN LEAD YOU BACK TO
THAT PLACE WHERE YOU CAN FIND
00:48:39.55\00:48:43.08
RECONCILIATION, THEN YOUR FAMILY
MEMBER WOULDN'T BE FOREVER
00:48:43.08\00:48:47.02
SAYING, THAT YOU DAMAGED MY
SON OR YOU DAMAGED MY SISTER.
00:48:47.02\00:48:53.90
THEY WOULD NOT REMEMBER THAT ON
YOU FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES.
00:48:53.90\00:48:57.27
THAT'S SIMILAR TO
THE PILLOW SITUATION.
00:48:57.27\00:49:01.44
THINGS THEY CAN'T RESOLVE.
NOW IF YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE
00:49:01.44\00:49:06.78
RELATIONSHIP. THAT'S
DIFFERENT ALL TOGETHER.
00:49:06.78\00:49:10.51
PHYSICAL ABUSE, CALL MOM, DAD,
BROTHER, SISTER, COUSIN, IF IT
00:49:10.51\00:49:15.88
IS ABUSIVE, BUT DON'T MAKE
THE FIRST PERIMETER FAMILY.
00:49:15.88\00:49:20.52
GO TO SOMEBODY THAT IS
PROFESSIONAL, SOMEONE WHO CAN
00:49:20.52\00:49:23.12
HELP YOU. THAT WAS
AN AMAZING--THOSE ARE
00:49:23.12\00:49:26.76
THINGS THAT AS A COACH
I'VE SEEN PEOPLE DO THAT.
00:49:26.76\00:49:32.83
GOD'S GRACE IF THEY DECIDE TO
WORK THROUGH IT, THEY GET IT ALL
00:49:32.83\00:49:36.24
FIXED, BUT FOREVER YOU'LL
GO TO SOMEBODY'S HOUSE, YEAH,
00:49:36.24\00:49:39.64
CHEATER'S COMING OVER TODAY.
AND YOU'LL SAY, THAT WAS FIVE
00:49:39.64\00:49:43.51
YEAR AGO. WE'RE TOGETHER.
00:49:43.51\00:49:46.61
YEAH, BUT I REMEMBER
WHAT YOU DID TO MY DAUGHTER.
00:49:46.61\00:49:49.15
ENVIRONMENT WHERE
PEOPLE CANNOT FORGET.
00:49:49.15\00:49:53.86
THAT YOU PLANTED THAT WILL ROOT
AND GROW AND THEY'LL NEVER NOT
00:49:53.86\00:49:57.56
HAVE A PLANT. IS
NOT GOING TO BE SWEET.
00:49:57.56\00:50:01.90
IT WILL BE SOUR. >>
START WITH YOUR PASTOR OR
00:50:01.90\00:50:05.07
MARRIAGE COUNSELOR.
THIS ONE, THEY WANT TO BE
00:50:05.07\00:50:08.00
ANONYMOUS, AND LOOKING
FOR GOD'S WILL AND WISDOM.
00:50:08.00\00:50:11.67
I'LL READ SEVERAL
PARAGRAPHS HERE OR SENTENCES.
00:50:11.67\00:50:14.68
I'M 49 AND HAVE DESIRE TO
BE MARRIED AND TO HAVE A FAMILY
00:50:14.68\00:50:17.58
SINCE I WAS AT
LEAST 16 YEARS OLD.
00:50:17.58\00:50:24.72
TO GOD AS I CAN, MAYBE IT
HAS SCARED ALL THE MEN OFF.
00:50:24.72\00:50:29.99
I CAME CLOSE TO MARRIAGE ONCE,
BUT AFTER PRAYER, AS SWEET AS MY
00:50:29.99\00:50:35.50
FRIEND WAS AND STILL IS,
HE WAS NOT THE ONE FOR ME.
00:50:35.50\00:50:38.27
WHAT SHOULD I DO?
WITHOUT GOING ON DATING
00:50:38.27\00:50:49.88
WEBSITES, WHICH I HAVE, BUT I'M
IN A RUSH BUT I WANT TO BE IN
00:50:49.88\00:50:56.58
GOD'S WILL. THANK
YOU IN ADVANCE FOR YOUR
00:50:56.58\00:50:58.95
ANSWER. DO?
00:50:58.95\00:51:05.93
>> AND OBVIOUSLY IT
SEEMS LIKE SHE'S A FEMALE.
00:51:05.93\00:51:09.70
>> YES, IT DOES. >>
THAT'S A SITUATION THAT I
00:51:09.70\00:51:14.80
MARRIAGE COUNSELOR, SOMEBODY
WHO CAN DEAL WITH THE ISSUES.
00:51:14.80\00:51:18.41
TO BE SINGLE FOR 49 YEARS, THEY
SAID THEY MADE A STATEMENT THAT
00:51:18.41\00:51:23.11
I WON'T EVEN QUALIFY AND
SAY MAYBE THAT'S TRUE BECAUSE
00:51:23.11\00:51:26.05
SOMETIMES PEOPLE CAN BE
OVERLY ANALYZING THEMSELVES.
00:51:26.05\00:51:30.15
AND I HAVE SEEN PEOPLE--ON
ONE SIDE OR THE OTHER, THE
00:51:30.15\00:51:34.26
PERIMETER, SOME PEOPLE HAVE BEEN
SO EXACT IN WHAT THEY WANT AND
00:51:34.26\00:51:39.66
EVERYBODY WHO COMES
THER WAY IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
00:51:39.66\00:51:42.33
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THAT, SOME
PEOPLE WILL TAKE ANYTHING THAT
00:51:42.33\00:51:45.03
COMES THEIR WAY AND THEN
DISCOVER THAT'S NOT WHAT I WANT.
00:51:45.03\00:51:48.14
YOU CAN BE SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN
THAT, BUT I THINK THE PHRASE SHE
00:51:48.14\00:51:51.44
MENTIONED, SOMETIMES--AND SHE
DID NOT SAY THIS, BU SOMETIMES
00:51:51.44\00:51:56.14
YOU CAN BE SO HEAVENLY
MINDED THAT NOT EARTHY GOOD.
00:51:56.14\00:52:00.38
BE THE PERSON
YOU WANT TO ATTRACT.
00:52:00.38\00:52:04.65
GODLY. YOUR PRINCIPLES.
00:52:04.65\00:52:09.99
>> BY THE WAY YOU
DRESS OR ANY OF THAT.
00:52:09.99\00:52:15.63
GO HALF DRESSED,
NO, DON'T DO THAT.
00:52:15.63\00:52:20.24
IN THAT SITUATION?
>> IN THAT SITUATION?
00:52:20.24\00:52:22.87
I WOULD PRAY. A LOT.
00:52:22.87\00:52:28.28
COUNSEL FROM--I WOULD READ A LOT
AND PRAY A LOT FOR THE LORD TO
00:52:28.28\00:52:35.12
GUIDE ME. HE
WON'T DIAPPOINT YOU.
00:52:35.12\00:52:40.09
HE WILL GUIDE YOU. HE
WANTS YOU TO BE HAPPY.
00:52:40.09\00:52:42.39
HE WANTS YOU TO HAVE AN ABUNDANT
LIFE AND HE WILL BLESS YOU AND
00:52:42.39\00:52:45.86
GUIDE YOU, BUT
YOU HAVE TO GO TO HIM.
00:52:45.86\00:52:50.27
TALKING ABOUT PRAYER?
ANGIE, DO YOU HAVE A SHORT
00:52:50.27\00:52:53.23
PRAYER AND PASTOR WITH A MINUTE
OR SO LEFT SUMMARIZE EVERYTHING.
00:52:53.23\00:52:58.71
>> A SHORT PRAYER RIGHT NOW.
OUR FATHER IN HEAVEN, WE COME TO
00:52:58.71\00:53:01.81
YOU IN THE NAME OF JESUS.
WE THANK YOU FOR THIS TOPIC OF
00:53:01.81\00:53:06.65
MARRIAGE AND RELATIONSHIPS.
WE PRAY FOR THE PEOPLE OUT WHO
00:53:06.65\00:53:10.45
ARE SEEKING FOR THE RIGHT MATE.
WE PRAY, LORD, THAT YOU'LL GUIDE
00:53:10.45\00:53:14.52
THEM AND LEAD THEM IN EVERY
ASPECT OF THEIR LIVES SO THAT
00:53:14.52\00:53:19.13
THEY CAN FIND SOMEONE. WE
KNOW THAT YOU WANT US TO BE
00:53:19.13\00:53:24.67
HAPPY. ARE
CELEBRATING ANNIVERSARY.
00:53:24.67\00:53:29.44
BLESS THEM, LORD.
THANK THEM FOR EACH AND EVERY
00:53:29.44\00:53:32.57
ONE. THANK YOU.
00:53:32.57\00:53:39.55
TOWARDS US. IN JEEZ' NAME.
00:53:39.55\00:53:44.02
AMEN. BEAUTIFUL.
00:53:44.02\00:53:50.79
YOUR SPOUSE. >> I
HAVE LEARNED MY WIFE LOVE
00:53:50.79\00:53:57.03
HUGS. HUGS.
00:53:57.03\00:54:04.24
LEARN AFFIRMATION. I
APPRECIATE THAT DINNER.
00:54:04.24\00:54:10.75
OUT. I'M SO GLAD
YOU CAME HOME EARLY
00:54:10.75\00:54:14.02
TODAY. HOME EARLY.
00:54:14.02\00:54:25.73
COMPLIMENT YOUR WIFE.
SOME PEOPLE DON'T AFFIRM EACH
00:54:25.73\00:54:28.80
OTHER. DISTRACTED IN THE WRONG
00:54:28.80\00:54:32.77
DIRECTION. WITH
EACH OTHER AND MY HUSBAND
00:54:32.77\00:54:37.31
IS SUCH A GOOD
HUSBAND TO ME. HE LOVES ME.
00:54:37.31\00:54:42.48
HE DOES THINGS FOR ME.
I'M COMING OUT--I'M COMING
00:54:42.48\00:54:46.41
FROM THE GROCERY STORE WITH BAGS
OF GROCERIES, HE'LL RUN TO THE
00:54:46.41\00:54:50.89
DOOR AND HELP WITH
THE GROCERIES GROCERIES.
00:54:50.89\00:55:01.50
WATCHING--WHAT CAN I DO?
>> MERCY, THANK YOU, LORD.
00:55:01.50\00:55:05.03
MY HUSBAND PICKED UP THE
WHOLE BAG BECAUSE WE HAVE A--
00:55:05.03\00:55:13.07
>> MY WATCH
FELL BETWEEN THE BED.
00:55:13.07\00:55:21.08
COULDN'T FIND IT. HE
GOT A FLASHLIGHT AND LOOKED
00:55:21.08\00:55:25.92
THROUGH EVERYTHING. HE
LIFTED THE BED AND SAID LOOK
00:55:25.92\00:55:30.36
UNDER THERE. AND
THERE WAS MY WATCH.
00:55:30.36\00:55:35.36
>> AFFIRMATION.
DON'T GO CRAZY AND SPEND
00:55:35.36\00:55:39.40
YOURSELF IN
OBLIVION. ACTS OF SERVICE.
00:55:39.40\00:55:43.71
AND FINALLY SOMETHING THAT FOCUS
SPOUSES NEED PHYSICAL TOUCH.
00:55:43.71\00:55:55.58
THOSE ARE THE FIVE LANGUAGES.
LEARN YOUR SPOUSE'S LOVE
00:55:55.58\00:56:03.69
GOING. >> ABSOLUTELY.
00:56:03.69\00:56:13.60
>> OUR TWO HOURS
HAVE GONE BY QUICKLY.
00:56:13.60\00:56:18.47
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH
PASTOR JOHN AND ANGIE.
00:56:18.47\00:56:22.58
HEART, YOUR EXPERIENCE
BUT FROM THE WORD OF GOD.
00:56:22.58\00:56:24.95
TO ME YOU BOTH ARE SEASONED.
IF YOU CAN SAY THAT IN GOD'S
00:56:24.95\00:56:29.55
WORK, I MEAN THAT WITH THE MOST
RESPECT, YOU HAVE BEEN IN THE
00:56:29.55\00:56:33.62
TRENCHES. WITH
PEOPLE AND THE FRUIT OF
00:56:33.62\00:56:37.33
YOUR MARRIAGE AND THAT
EXPERIENCE HAS COME FORTH
00:56:37.33\00:56:39.53
TONIGHT. AND WE
HOPE AND PRAY THAT IT'S
00:56:39.53\00:56:47.04
BEEN AN ENCOURAGEMENT FOR YOU.
WE WANT TO THANK YOU FOR CALLING
00:56:47.04\00:56:50.41
IN AND E-MAIL LING
IN WITH YOUR NEEDS.
00:56:50.41\00:56:55.58
DEPARTMENT WILL PRAY OVER
YOU AND YOUR MARRIAGE IT'S.
00:56:55.58\00:56:57.81
WE HAVE THESE TWO COUPLES HERE
WHO WILL BE GETTING A SPECIAL
00:56:57.81\00:57:02.95
GIFT. YEARS AND
RAY AND MARGIE, THEIR
00:57:02.95\00:57:07.62
ANNIVERSARY TODAY.
THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE.
00:57:07.62\00:57:10.39
KNOW THAT WE LOVE
YOU AND PRAY FOR YOU.
00:57:10.39\00:57:27.98