¤ I WANT TO SPEND MY
LIFE ¤ ¤ SPEND MY LIFE ¤
00:00:05.17\00:00:09.87
¤ MENDING BROKEN PEOPLE
¤ ¤ I WANT TO SPEND MY LIFE
00:00:09.87\00:00:18.91
REMOVING PAIN ¤ ¤
LORD, LET MY WORDS ¤
00:00:18.91\00:00:25.45
¤ LET MY WORDS ¤ ¤
HEAL UP HEARTS THAT HURT ¤
00:00:25.45\00:00:33.50
¤ I WANT TO SPEND MY LIFE
¤ ¤ MENDING BROKEN PEOPLE ¤
00:00:33.50\00:00:45.07
¤ I WANT TO SPEND MY LIFE
¤ ¤ MENDING BROKEN PEOPLE ¤
00:00:45.07\00:00:54.92
¤
00:00:58.82\00:01:04.76
>> HELLO. I'M
SHELLEY QUINN AND WELCOME
00:01:09.30\00:01:17.21
AGAIN TO 3ABN
THURSDAY NIGHT LIVE.
00:01:17.21\00:01:20.08
WE ARE SO EXCITED TO BE HERE.
AND WE WANT TO THANK YOU SO MUCH
00:01:20.08\00:01:23.41
FOR YOUR PRAYERS AND YOUR LOVE
AND FINANCIAL SUPPORT OF THE
00:01:23.41\00:01:28.58
MENDING BROKEN PEOPLE NETWORK.
IT'S GOING TO BE A COUPLE OF
00:01:28.58\00:01:33.42
HIGH-OCTANE HOURS, BECAUSE IF
YOU ARE FAMILIAR WITH 3ABN, YOU
00:01:33.42\00:01:40.56
WILL KNOW HER WELL. LET
ME JUST INTRODUCE HER, CHERI
00:01:40.56\00:01:45.27
PETERS. SO GOOD TO --
00:01:45.27\00:01:46.77
>> SO GOOD TO BE BACK.
>> SO GOOD TO HAVE YOU BACK.
00:01:46.77\00:01:51.64
>> I DON'T THINK I HAVE
BEEN HERE FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS.
00:01:51.64\00:01:55.54
>> THAT'S A SHAME. >>
AND I HAVE BEEN WORKING WITH
00:01:55.54\00:02:00.62
YOU GUYS FOR 27 YEARS.
EVEN FLYING IN, I WAS DRIVING
00:02:00.62\00:02:06.89
AROUND GOING IT
HAS BEEN TOO LONG.
00:02:06.89\00:02:09.32
>> WELL, YOU ARE ONE OF THE
ALL-TIME FAVORITE HOSTS OF THE
00:02:09.32\00:02:14.00
PROGRAM. AND IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN
00:02:14.00\00:02:15.86
CELEBRATING LIFE IN
RECOVERY, YOU NEED TO SEE THAT.
00:02:15.86\00:02:20.14
WE'RE COMING TO YOU LIVE, SO
THAT MEANS YOU CAN'T MAKE ANY
00:02:20.14\00:02:25.21
MISTAKES. [ LAUGHTER ]
00:02:25.21\00:02:26.17
>> NOW WE'RE IN TROUBLE.
>> YEAH, WE ARE IN TROUBLE.
00:02:26.17\00:02:29.04
AND I HAVE TO SAY THIS,
DANNY AND YVONNE WERE SO LOOKING
00:02:29.04\00:02:33.78
FORWARD TO DOING
THIS INTERVIEW TONIGHT.
00:02:33.78\00:02:36.89
AND THE REASON I GOT TAPPED
ON THE SHOULDER IS BECAUSE AN
00:02:36.89\00:02:42.56
ADVENTIST SURGEON GOT AHOLD OF
DANNY A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO AND
00:02:42.56\00:02:47.30
REMOVED HIS
GALLBLADDER. >> NO WAY.
00:02:47.30\00:02:49.26
>> YES, WAY. >> WE
HAVE TO PRAY FOR HIM
00:02:49.26\00:02:53.10
TONIGHT. >> WE WILL
PRAY FOR HIM TONIGHT.
00:02:53.10\00:02:56.00
BUT DANNY HAS DONE
NOTHING BUT BRAG ON HIS SURGEON.
00:02:56.00\00:03:00.21
AND DANNY WAS DOWN THERE DOING
THE NEW MUSIC PROJECT THAT WE
00:03:00.21\00:03:04.48
HAVE COMING UP FOR CAMP MEETING
ON THE THREE ANGELS' MESSAGES,
00:03:04.48\00:03:13.42
AND DANNY SAID THAT THE DOCTOR
PRAYED WITH HIM BEFORE THE
00:03:13.42\00:03:17.96
SURGERY, AND HE HAS JUST BRAGGED
AND BRAGGED AND BRAGGED, SO I'M
00:03:17.96\00:03:23.06
GOING TO GO GOWN TO NASHVILLE
IF I NEED ANYTHING DONE.
00:03:23.06\00:03:26.67
[ LAUGHTER ] >> THAT'S AMAZING.
00:03:26.67\00:03:28.00
>> TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO GET
CAUGHT UP WITH CHERI ON WHAT IS
00:03:28.00\00:03:32.44
GOING ON IN HER LIFE AND
HER MINISTRY, AND SHE WILL BE
00:03:32.44\00:03:35.94
TALKING TO US AND SHARING
WITH US THE CHANGING FACE OF
00:03:35.94\00:03:39.28
ADDICTION, AND THIS IS GOING TO
BE A LIVELY TWO HOURS, BUT IT'S
00:03:39.28\00:03:44.45
INFORMATION YOU NEED TO KNOW,
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, SATAN -- IF
00:03:44.45\00:03:49.22
HE CAN'T TRAP US ONE WAY.
SOME OF US MAY SAY I DON'T HAVE
00:03:49.22\00:03:53.36
DRUG ADDICTIONS, I DON'T HAVE
ALCOHOL ADDICTIONS, I'M NOT AN
00:03:53.36\00:03:58.20
ADDICTIVE PERSONALITY, WELL, YOU
ARE GOING TO FIND OUT TONIGHT,
00:03:58.20\00:04:01.84
ALMOST ALL OF US ARE, AND SOME
OF US DON'T REALIZE THE DANGER
00:04:01.84\00:04:06.47
WE'RE IN ACTUALLY.
BEFORE WE GET STARTED, THOUGH.
00:04:06.47\00:04:09.78
WE WERE GOING TO
READ 1 CORINTHIANS 1:26.
00:04:09.78\00:04:15.95
AND YOU ARE THE
ONE WHO SUGGESTED THIS.
00:04:15.95\00:04:19.19
PAUL SAYS YOU SEE YOUR CALLING,
BRETHREN THAT NOT MANY WISE
00:04:19.19\00:04:25.99
ACCORDING TO THE FLESH, NOT
MANY MIGHTY, NOT MANY NOBLE ARE
00:04:25.99\00:04:31.07
CALLED, BUT GOD HAS CHOSEN THE
FOOLISH THINGS OF THE WORLD TO
00:04:31.07\00:04:35.60
PUT TO SHAME THE WISE. I
THINK WE BOTH SIT IN THAT
00:04:35.60\00:04:40.64
CATEGORY. >> WELL,
A LOT OF PEOPLE FIT IN
00:04:40.64\00:04:42.78
THAT CATEGORY, AND SOMETIMES WE
STEP BACK AND WE'RE LIKE WHO AM
00:04:42.78\00:04:47.95
I TO DO ANYTHING, AND GOD
SAYS JUST STAND UP, BE BRAVE AND
00:04:47.95\00:04:52.59
WATCH WHAT I CAN DO, AND SO THAT
WAS ONE OF MY FAVORITE VERSES
00:04:52.59\00:04:58.03
BECAUSE OF THAT, BECAUSE HE IS
NOT LOOKING FOR US TO BE GREATER
00:04:58.03\00:05:01.56
OR WISER, HE IS
SAYING JUST TRUST ME.
00:05:01.56\00:05:04.80
>> HE SAYS GOD HAS CHOSEN
THE WEAK THINGS OF THE WORLD TO
00:05:04.80\00:05:11.01
SHAME THE
THINGS THAT ARE MIGHTY.
00:05:11.01\00:05:12.77
THIS IS TRUE, BECAUSE I THINK
THE REASON GOD CHOOSES THE WEEK
00:05:12.77\00:05:21.52
AND THE FOOLISH THINGS OF
THE WORLD -- BECAUSE I OFTEN ASK
00:05:21.52\00:05:28.56
MYSELF WHO AM I
TO SHARE THE GOSPEL.
00:05:28.56\00:05:36.77
AND REMEMBER, BLESSING IS ON THE
GO! SO IF YOU JUST STAND UP AND
00:05:36.77\00:05:40.27
SAY, LORD, HERE I AM SIN ME,
HE WILL DO GREAT THINGS THROUGH
00:05:40.27\00:05:48.08
YOU. BUT BEFORE
WE GET ROCKING AND
00:05:48.08\00:05:50.28
ROLLING, LET'S
HAVE SOME MUSIC FIRST.
00:05:50.28\00:05:53.82
WE KNOW HOW MUCH WE LOVE MUSIC,
AND TONIGHT WE HAVE ONE OF MY
00:05:53.82\00:05:59.09
FAVORITES, RUDY MICELLI, SINGING
ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS, "OH I
00:05:59.09\00:06:04.66
WANT TO KNOW YOU MORE." ¤
00:06:04.66\00:06:09.73
¤ ¤ OH, I WANT
TO KNOW YOU MORE ¤
00:06:33.72\00:07:20.67
¤ DEEP WITHIN MY SOUL
¤ ¤ I WANT TO KNOW YOU ¤
00:07:20.67\00:07:24.61
¤ OH, I WANT TO KNOW YOU ¤ ¤
FEEL YOUR HEART AND KNOW YOUR
00:07:24.61\00:07:32.71
MIND ¤ ¤ LOOK WITHIN YOUR EYES ¤
00:07:32.71\00:07:42.36
¤ I WANT TO KNOW YOU ¤ ¤
OH, I WANT TO KNOW YOU MORE ¤
00:07:42.36\00:07:56.00
¤ ¤ OH, I WANT
TO KNOW YOU MORE ¤
00:08:02.48\00:08:55.20
¤ DEEP WITHIN MY SOUL ¤ ¤ I
WANT TO KNOW YOU, OH, I WANT
00:08:55.20\00:09:02.94
TO KNOW YOU ¤ ¤ SEE
YOUR HEART, AND KNOW YOUR
00:09:02.94\00:09:08.64
MINE ¤ ¤ LOOK WITHIN YOUR EYES ¤
00:09:08.64\00:09:14.58
¤ OH, I WANT TO KNOW YOU
¤ ¤ OH, I WANT TO KNOW YOU ¤
00:09:14.58\00:09:20.46
¤ OH, I WANT TO KNOW YOU ¤
¤ AND I WOULD GIVE MY FINAL
00:09:20.46\00:09:31.20
BREATH ¤ ¤ TO KNOW
YOU IN YOUR DEATH AND
00:09:31.20\00:09:36.87
RESURRECTION ¤ ¤ OH, I
WANT TO KNOW YOU MORE ¤
00:09:36.87\00:09:41.14
¤ OH, I WANT TO KNOW
YOU ¤ ¤ KNOW YOU MORE ¤
00:09:41.14\00:09:54.26
¤ LORD, I WANT
TO KNOW YOU MORE ¤
00:09:54.26\00:10:09.87
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH, RUDY
MICELLI, AND, YOU KNOW, THAT IS
00:10:20.88\00:10:25.92
A SINCERE HEART CRY FOR HIM.
HE IS A WONDERFUL PERSON, AND
00:10:25.92\00:10:29.82
GOD HAS GIVEN HIM SUCH A GIFT.
WE'RE SO GLAD HE USES IT FOR THE
00:10:29.82\00:10:35.30
GLORY OF THE LORD. OUR
SPECIAL GUEST TONIGHT IS
00:10:35.30\00:10:39.13
CHERI PETERS WHO IS THE FOUNDER
OF TRUE STEP MINISTRIES, MOST
00:10:39.13\00:10:42.94
WIDELY, KNOWN, I THINK, ON 3ABN
AS THE HOST OF CELEBRATING LIFE
00:10:42.94\00:10:46.94
IN RECOVERY. A DEAR FRIEND.
00:10:46.94\00:10:49.31
A FRIEND OF 3ABN, AND A DEAR
PERSONAL FRIEND, PRECIOUS PERSON
00:10:49.31\00:10:55.12
AND A WILD WOMAN IN A
GOOD WAY. [ LAUGHTER ]
00:10:55.12\00:10:58.55
>> I GOT TO SAY WITH -- WITH
RUDY THAT LAST TIME I WORKED
00:10:58.55\00:11:02.82
WITH HIM, HE GOT UP AND SANG,
AND I WAS SPEECHLESS, AND I'M
00:11:02.82\00:11:07.30
NOT SPEECHLESS, BUT HE DOES
HAVE -- HE IS THE REAL DEAL AS
00:11:07.30\00:11:11.40
FAR AS A MAN OF GOD,
AND HIS VOICE IS SO GOOD.
00:11:11.40\00:11:14.90
>> AND HE
MINISTERS THROUGH MUSIC.
00:11:14.90\00:11:17.61
>> YEAH YEAH.
00:11:17.61\00:11:18.74
I WAS DEFINITELY SPEECHLESS.
>> IT'S NOT A PERFORMANCE, IT'S
00:11:18.74\00:11:22.84
A MINISTRY. >> YEAH.
00:11:22.84\00:11:25.05
AND I WANT TO SAY FOR
DANNY -- AND I WOULD LIKE TO
00:11:25.05\00:11:28.32
PRAY FOR HIM -- >> ABSOLUTELY.
00:11:28.32\00:11:30.62
>> -- IF IT WASN'T FOR DANNY, I
WOULDN'T BE DOING ANY MINISTRY,
00:11:30.62\00:11:37.03
BECAUSE WHAT YOU DO FOR A LO OF
PEOPLE AND WHAT YOU DID FOR ME
00:11:37.03\00:11:40.56
IS YOU LOOKED AT ME LIKE, MAN,
WHAT CAN WE DO TO HELP WITH YOUR
00:11:40.56\00:11:48.30
CALLING? [ LAUGHTER ]
00:11:48.30\00:11:49.04
>> AND NO MATTER WHAT GOD CALLED
ME TO DO, I HAD SUCH SUPPORT
00:11:49.04\00:11:54.18
FROM EVERY SINGLE
PERSON HERE, ESPECIALLY DANNY.
00:11:54.18\00:11:57.11
SO MY HEART GOES OUT TO HIM AND
HIS SURGERY, AND I JUST PRAY FOR
00:11:57.11\00:12:02.65
A SPEEDY RECOVERY. >>
WHY DON'T WE PRAY RIGHT NOW.
00:12:02.65\00:12:06.32
AND PRAY FOR OUR AUDIENCE
AS WELL, BECAUSE WE STARTED BY
00:12:06.32\00:12:10.03
SAYING THAT GOD CHOOSES THE
FOOLISH THINGS OF THE WORLD SO
00:12:10.03\00:12:15.90
HE CAN SHOW HIS MAG
IF GANSZ THROUGH US.
00:12:15.90\00:12:26.61
SO SOME PEOPLE AT HOME FEELING
YOU DON'T HAVE PURPOSE, GOD CAN
00:12:26.61\00:12:32.15
USE YOU. >> DEAR
FATHER GOD, FIRST OF
00:12:32.15\00:12:34.85
ALL, I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THANK
YOU SO MUCH THAT YOU HAVE YOUR
00:12:34.85\00:12:39.35
HAND ON US, THAT YOU USE ANY OF
-pUS. I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU
00:12:39.35\00:12:43.99
FOR THAT. AND
RIGHT NOW WHILE DANNY IS
00:12:43.99\00:12:46.13
GOING THROUGH SURGERY, IT IS
NEVER EASY TO HAVE SOMEBODY CUT
00:12:46.13\00:12:49.50
INTO YOU, AND I JUST PRAY AS HE
IS GOING THROUGH THAT HELP HIM
00:12:49.50\00:12:54.64
REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE GOD AND
YOU ARE GREAT, AND YOUR HAND IS
00:12:54.64\00:12:58.01
ON HIM, AND ANYBODY WATCHING
IN THE AUDIENCE, THIS IS A TIME
00:12:58.01\00:13:02.31
THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE
FEARFUL, BUT TAKE THAT AWAY FROM
00:13:02.31\00:13:06.78
US. THIS IS A
TIME RIGHT NOW THAT WE
00:13:06.78\00:13:08.88
CAN STAND UP AND SHOW THE
CHARACTER AND GLORY OF GOD, AND
00:13:08.88\00:13:13.92
WE GET TO BE A
PART OF THIS END TIME.
00:13:13.92\00:13:17.96
I PRAY FOR YOUR HOLY SPIRIT,
ANOINT US, PUT YOUR HAND ON US,
00:13:17.96\00:13:24.37
AND ANYBODY WATCHING, WE
HOPE WE HEAR YOUR STORIES.
00:13:24.37\00:13:29.90
>> AMEN. HAH AMEN.
00:13:29.90\00:13:31.44
AND I DO WANT TO REPORT SO
THAT NO ONE IS OVERLY CONCERNED,
00:13:31.44\00:13:35.74
DANNY IS DOING
EXTREMELY WELL. AND OF COURSE --
00:13:35.74\00:13:39.01
>> HE IS A FIGHTER. >> HE IS.
00:13:39.01\00:13:41.42
HE IS. BUT THE
STORY THAT YOU SHARED
00:13:41.42\00:13:45.72
ABOUT HOW DANNY AND 3ABN
GAVE YOU A PLATFORM AND GOT YOU
00:13:45.72\00:13:51.23
STARTED AND HELP TRAIN YOU UP,
WE HAR THAT STORY ALL THE TIME.
00:13:51.23\00:13:55.90
THAT'S WHAT 3ABN IS ABOUT.
AS MUCH AS IT'S A MENDING BROKEN
00:13:55.90\00:14:00.74
PEOPLE NETWORK, IT HAS GIVEN SO
MANY PEOPLE -- NOBODY KNEW DOUG
00:14:00.74\00:14:05.97
BATCHELOR BEFORE HE
STARTED COMING HERE EITHER.
00:14:05.97\00:14:08.51
SO I WOULD LIKE TO DO ONE THING.
MOST OF US KNOW YOUR STORY SO
00:14:08.51\00:14:13.05
WELL, AND SHE IS LITERALLY A
MIRACLE FROM THE STREETS, BUT
WE-HAVE SO MANY NEW VIEWERS,
00:14:13.05\00:14:20.49
COULD YOU GIVE US THE READER'S
DIGEST VERSION OF WHERE GOD
00:14:20.49\00:14:27.13
FOUND YOU AND HOW HE BROUGHT YOU
OUT? >> EVERY TIME I GET TO TELL
00:14:27.13\00:14:31.80
THIS STORY, IT
VINDICATES GODS CHARACTER.
00:14:31.80\00:14:36.50
I WAS RAISED BY A COUPLE OF KIDS
THAT WERE LOST IN ALL KINDS OF
00:14:36.50\00:14:41.64
THINGS, YOU KNOW. YOU
KNOW, MY DAD EVENTUALLY DIED
00:14:41.64\00:14:44.55
IN A CRACK HOUSE, AND MY
MOM HAD FIVE KIDS AND I WAS
00:14:44.55\00:14:49.72
PROBABLY -- YOU KNOW, I WAS
THE SECOND CHILD, AND I WAS THE
00:14:49.72\00:14:54.36
CHILD THAT SHE FELT
KIND OF RUINED HER LIFE.
00:14:54.36\00:14:57.53
IF SHE WASN'T PREGNANT SHE
WOULDN'T HAVE TO BE STUCK WHERE
00:14:57.53\00:15:02.00
SHE WAS AND ALL OF
THAT KIND OF STUFF.
00:15:02.00\00:15:05.07
SO I DON'T THINK I
HAD A MOM OR A DAD.
00:15:05.07\00:15:08.24
MY DAD MOLESTED ME FROM THE TIME
I WAS THREE-MONTH-OLD, AND MY
00:15:08.24\00:15:13.58
MOM TRIED TO SELF
ABORT A NUMBER OF TIMES.
00:15:13.58\00:15:16.88
SO ONE OF THE THINGS I SPENT
MOST OF MY LIFE AS A KID IS
00:15:16.88\00:15:21.52
TRYING TO BE LOVED. I
WANTED TO BE LOVED IN THE
00:15:21.52\00:15:24.25
WORST WAY. I TRIED
TO BE FUNNY AND CUTE AND
00:15:24.25\00:15:27.32
DO THE RIGHT THING, AND
BY THE AGE OF 8, I PROBABLY
00:15:27.32\00:15:31.46
HAD -- I -- I WOULD SAY MY
FIRST REAL SUICIDE ATTEMPT.
00:15:31.46\00:15:36.53
I TRIED TO KILL MYSELF BY
JUMPING OFF OF A HOUSE, AND BY
00:15:36.53\00:15:40.24
13 I WAS ON THE STREETS OF LOS
ANGELES, AND WHEN I SAY THAT, IF
00:15:40.24\00:15:44.31
SOMEBODY KNOWS WHAT THAT IS
ABOUT, THEY CAN GET A SENSE OF
00:15:44.31\00:15:48.11
THAT, BUT WHEN I ENDED UP ON THE
STREETS HOMELESS BY 13, THERE
00:15:48.11\00:15:53.95
WERE ABOUT 80,000 KIDS LIKE
ME IN ONE MAJOR CITY IN L.A.
00:15:53.95\00:15:58.09
SO YOU WERE PICKED UP AND
FUNNELED INTO SOME PRETTY DARK
00:15:58.09\00:16:02.96
INDUSTRIES RIGHT AWAY.
FOR ME WITHIN THE -- 24 HOURS.
00:16:02.96\00:16:09.90
AND I THOUGHT MY
GROWING UP YEARS WERE TOUGH.
00:16:09.90\00:16:12.83
BUT WHAT I SAW ON THE STREETS
AND WHAT WE'RE CAPABLE OF DOING,
00:16:12.83\00:16:17.01
AND WHEN WE TALK ABOUT
ADDICTIONS THAT'S MY PASSION,
00:16:17.01\00:16:20.31
BUT WHAT I SAW WAS SO DARK AND
SO UGLY, AND AT 23 YEARS OLD I
00:16:20.31\00:16:25.48
WAS DONE. SOMEBODY
PUT A GUN TO MY FACE,
00:16:25.48\00:16:27.88
AND THEY WERE GOING TO BLOW
MY HEAD OFF, AND I THOUGHT THANK
00:16:27.88\00:16:31.89
YOU SO MUCH, I'M SO DONE.
AND THEN HE CHANGED HIS MIND AND
00:16:31.89\00:16:38.19
I'M LIKE PLEASE JUST SHOOT ME.
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT, HE LEFT,
00:16:38.19\00:16:43.90
AND OF COURSE WAS
JUST TRYING TO SCARE ME.
00:16:43.90\00:16:46.03
AND I DID NOT
WANT TO TAKE A BREATH.
00:16:46.03\00:16:50.74
I DID NOTING WANT TO BE THERE,
AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT I ENDED
00:16:50.74\00:16:55.34
UP MEETING GOD IN A DRUG HOUSE
STRUNG OUT ON HEROIN AND THE
00:16:55.34\00:17:02.85
ONLY THING I FELT
WAS TOTALLY LOVED.
00:17:02.85\00:17:06.49
I FELT LIKE WHAT HE SAID WAS IF
YOU TRUST ME I CAN CHANGE YOUR
00:17:06.49\00:17:11.23
LIFE. I HAD 42
WARRANTS FOR MY ARREST.
00:17:11.23\00:17:16.03
I WAS STRUNG OUT, I WAS FAIRLY
ILLITERATE, AND I HOPE SOMEBODY
00:17:16.03\00:17:21.40
HEARS WHAT I SAY NEXT, BUT WHAT
HE GAVE ME WAS A LITTLE BIT OF A
00:17:21.40\00:17:25.67
VISION OF WHO I AM THE
DAY AFTER RESURRECTION.
00:17:25.67\00:17:29.68
NOT WHO AM I THE DAY AFTER I
PULL A NEEDLE OUT OF MY ARM, BUT
00:17:29.68\00:17:36.02
I AM VERY MUCH A WANTED
CHILD AND VERY MUCH INNOCENT.
00:17:36.02\00:17:39.92
AND I JUST WEPT, BECAUSE I
THOUGHT I HAVE NEVER BEEN LOVED
00:17:39.92\00:17:43.79
OR BEAUTIFUL OR INNOCENT.
AND GOD SAID I HAVE NEVER SEEN
00:17:43.79\00:17:47.23
YOU ANY OTHER WAY. AND I
THINK THE DEVIL LIES TO US
00:17:47.23\00:17:51.13
AND SAYS THIS IS HOW HE SEES US.
BUT HE KNOWS WHO WE ARE THE DAY
00:17:51.13\00:17:58.74
AFTER RESURRECTION.
AND HE SAYS TRUST ME.
00:17:58.74\00:18:02.71
I'LL GET YOU HOME. AND
I HAD TO LEARN HOW TO READ
00:18:02.71\00:18:05.91
AND GO TO SCHOOL AND FIGURE OUT,
YOU KNOW, HOW DO I LIVE AROUND
00:18:05.91\00:18:10.85
NORMAL FOLKS WHEN NOTHING I
HAVE EVER HAD HAPPEN WAS NORMAL,
00:18:10.85\00:18:15.09
AND -- AND THEN I FOUND OUT
-- >> YOU MENTIONED ONCE TO ME
00:18:15.09\00:18:19.46
THAT -- WHAT PEOPLE DO YOU GO
TO CHURCH, AND THEY ARE TALKING
00:18:19.46\00:18:22.70
ABOUT THE WEATHER, AND
YOU ARE LIKE, ARE YOU KIDDING?
00:18:22.70\00:18:27.87
THEY ARE TALKING
ABOUT WEATHER? >> AGAIN.
00:18:27.87\00:18:31.84
I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO SOCIALIZE.
I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO READ -- I
00:18:31.84\00:18:35.28
JUST DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING.
AND SO GOD HAS BEEN ABSOLUTELY
00:18:35.28\00:18:39.35
INCREDIBLE.
ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE.
00:18:39.35\00:18:40.92
AND PUT SOME PEOPLE IN
MY LIFE THAT WERE INCEDIBLE.
00:18:40.92\00:18:43.99
I MET A WOMAN THAT LET ME DO
RECOVERY AT HER HOUSE, AND SHE
00:18:43.99\00:18:49.76
WAS A VEGAN VEGETARIAN
ADVENTIST, AND I THOUGHT I WAS
00:18:49.76\00:18:53.90
IN HELL. I DON'T
KNOW IF I CAN SAY THAT,
00:18:53.90\00:18:56.53
BUT AS A DRUGGY YOU THINK THIS
IS WHERE YOU GO FOR ETERNITY
00:18:56.53\00:19:02.97
WHEN YOU HAVE REALLY ACTED
OUT.-BUT SHE SAVED MY LIFE. SHE
IS TRYING TO GIVE ME
00:19:02.97\00:19:10.01
CANTALOUPE, AND I'M TRYING TO
GET COFFEE OR DRUGS OR ANYTHING,
00:19:10.01\00:19:15.08
AND SHE SAID HOW ABOUT WATER?
AND I THOUGHT I CAN'T STOMACH
00:19:15.08\00:19:19.22
THAT. AND SHE WAS
SO PATIENT WITH ME
00:19:19.22\00:19:21.42
AND SO LOVING, THAT SHE LET ME
SEE THE FACE OF GOD AS A PERSON,
00:19:21.42\00:19:26.29
WHICH I HAD NEVER SEEN, AND THEN
SHE KIND OF MENTORED ME LIKE YOU
00:19:26.29\00:19:32.37
NEED TO LEARN HOW TO READ AND
TURN YOUR LIFE OVER AND FIND A
00:19:32.37\00:19:39.17
CHURCH, AND IT WAS INCREDIBLE.
AND THE FACT THAT GOD EVEN SEES
00:19:39.17\00:19:45.38
PEOPLE LIKE US. AND
NOW I KNOW THAT WE'RE ALL
00:19:45.38\00:19:48.12
SUCH A MESS, BUT -- BUT I HAVE
NEVER NOT FELT -- I HAVE NEVER
00:19:48.12\00:19:54.36
NOT FELT LOVED BY HIM. >> AMEN.
00:19:54.36\00:19:57.53
>> NEVER. >> WHAT A
BLESSING, BECAUSE SOME
00:19:57.53\00:20:00.53
OF US GROW UP IN CHURCH -- I
GREW UP IN THE CHURCH OF CHRIST,
00:20:00.53\00:20:04.63
AND I LOVED JESUS, BUT I
DIDN'T THINK GOD LOVED ME.
00:20:04.63\00:20:08.10
I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO RECEIVE
THAT LOVE UNTIL ONE DAY AS I WAS
00:20:08.10\00:20:12.07
PRAYING AS AN ADULT,
AND JUST REALLY PUSHING INTO
00:20:12.07\00:20:17.58
THE -- PRESSING INTO THE
PRESENCE OF GOD THAT ALL OF A
00:20:17.58\00:20:21.98
SUDDEN I'M JUST WORSHIPPING HIM,
AND WHAT I HEARD HIM SAY TO ME
00:20:21.98\00:20:26.59
WAS, ALL OF THESE YEARS YOU HAVE
WANTED A FATHER -- BECAUSE MY
00:20:26.59\00:20:33.29
DAD WAS KILLED WHEN I WAS
SIX, AND SO I DIDN'T HAVE THAT
00:20:33.29\00:20:38.00
SECURITY. AND THE
LORD JUST LET ME KNOW, I
00:20:38.00\00:20:40.80
HAVE ALWAYS BEEN
HERE. I AM YOUR FATHER.
00:20:40.80\00:20:44.04
AND IT WAS LIKE, WOE.
AND THEN I FOUND HEBREWS 1:3
00:20:44.04\00:20:49.91
THAT SAID THAT JESUS IS THE
EXACT REPRESENTATION -- HERE I
00:20:49.91\00:20:54.15
LOVED JESUS, BUT I HAD SUCH A
FEAR OF THE FATHER, BUT YOU TOLD
00:20:54.15\00:21:01.69
ME IN THE GREEN ROOM, AND I WANT
YOU TO SHARE THIS STORY -- YOU
00:21:01.69\00:21:06.19
TOLD ME IN THE GREEN
ROOM RECENTLY -- YOU HAVE BEEN
00:21:06.19\00:21:09.16
THROUGH A LOT. YOU
WERE DIAGNOSED WITH
00:21:09.16\00:21:11.50
CANCER -- I'LL LET YOU TELL
THE STORY, BUT YOU WENT TO THE
00:21:11.50\00:21:15.87
OKLAHOMA ACADEMY -- >>
LET ME SET THAT UP, THOUGH.
00:21:15.87\00:21:20.51
>> ALL RIGHT. WHAT
WAS REALLY INTERESTING TO
00:21:20.51\00:21:22.71
ME IS COMING FROM MEETING GOD
AND GOING TO SCHOOL, AND I GOT A
00:21:22.71\00:21:27.62
NURSING DEGREE, AND GOT INTO
MINISTRY, SO GOD HAS THE BLESSED
00:21:27.62\00:21:32.89
SINCE 1979 ALL THE WAY TO LIKE
TODAY OR THE LAST FEW YEARS, HE
00:21:32.89\00:21:37.93
HAS BLESSED MORE
THANK CAN EVEN IMAGINE.
00:21:37.93\00:21:40.20
I CAN'T -- I FEEL LIKE HE KISSES
ME ON THE FACE EVERY DAY, AND
00:21:40.20\00:21:44.60
IT'S LIKE I CAN'T
WAIT UNTIL YOU GET UP.
00:21:44.60\00:21:46.47
I WAS MARRIED, AND I HAVE A
CHILD AND ALL OF THAT STUFF --
00:21:46.47\00:21:50.81
>> AND A GRANDCHILD. >>
AND A LITTLE GRANNY, AND WHAT
00:21:50.81\00:21:55.34
IS REALLY INTERESTING
ABOUT OUR WALK IS THAT -- THAT
00:21:55.34\00:21:59.58
I -- THERE'S A -- A THING I
WOULD LIKE TO SHOW YOU FROM MY
00:21:59.58\00:22:06.89
DEVOTIONAL THAT BRAD
GAVE ME. AND WITH OUR WALK --
00:22:06.89\00:22:10.09
>> AND BRAD IS YOUR HUSBAND.
>> BRAD IS YOUR HUSBAND.
00:22:10.09\00:22:12.73
>> OKAY. >> AND HE
SAID AT ONE POINT, HE
00:22:12.73\00:22:16.87
SAID SATAN DOESN'T -- SATAN
DOESN'T -- SATAN DOESN'T CONCERN
00:22:16.87\00:22:25.17
HIMSELF WHEN WE'RE EATING CEREAL
OR BUSHING OUR TEETH OR MAKING A
00:22:25.17\00:22:31.51
PIT STOP, THEY ARE PHYSICAL
FUNCTIONS THAT DON'T EFFECT YOUR
00:22:31.51\00:22:36.72
RELATIONSHIP WITH
GOD OR HIS PEOPLE.
00:22:36.72\00:22:38.69
HOWEVER, THE MOMENT YOU
CROSS INTO THE WORLD WHERE YOUR
00:22:38.69\00:22:41.09
CHARACTER CAN BE
EXPRESSED HE IS RIGHT THERE.
00:22:41.09\00:22:44.59
SATAN CRAFTS MORAL
TEMPTATIONS TO CRAFT WITH YOU.
00:22:44.59\00:22:51.33
HE IS LOOKING TO
SPECIFIC NEEDS OF HIS CUSTOMER.
00:22:51.33\00:22:54.74
HE PULLS OUT YOUR PASTS, HE
RESEARCHES YOUR TRIGGERS AND
00:22:54.74\00:23:00.44
INVESTIGATES YOUR LESS-NOBLE
WAYS OF DEALING WITH PRESSURE,
00:23:00.44\00:23:03.81
STRESS, AND RESPONSIBILITY.
SATAN NEVER ACCIDENTALLY TEMPS
00:23:03.81\00:23:09.82
MAN. >> HUM.
00:23:09.82\00:23:11.15
>> THE MEANS OF HIS TIMING
ALWAYSCOLESSES WITH WHAT IS
00:23:11.15\00:23:16.42
GOING ON INSIDE OF
MAN AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT.
00:23:16.42\00:23:20.73
SO IN MY YEARS OF MEETING GOD
AND GETTING INTO THAT KIND OF
00:23:20.73\00:23:25.43
STUFF, WHAT WAS REALLY
INTERESTING TO ME IS THE
00:23:25.43\00:23:30.27
DEVIL -- HE COULD HIT ME WITH
A LOT OF THINGS, BUT NOT MUCH
00:23:30.27\00:23:35.18
ROCKED ME. I HAD MET GOD.
00:23:35.18\00:23:37.98
I COULD THINK,
AND I HAD MY MIND.
00:23:37.98\00:23:41.28
HE RESTORED MY SANITY, AND I
HAVE A HOME, AND SO HE COULDN'T
00:23:41.28\00:23:45.45
DO MUCH. BUT EVEN
WITH JESUS WHEN HE WAS
00:23:45.45\00:23:48.42
TEMPTED IN THE WILDERNESS, SATAN
LEFT HIM ALONE AND THEN CAME
00:23:48.42\00:23:53.33
BACK AT A MORE OPPORTUNE
TIME. AND NOT THAT LONG AGO I
00:23:53.33\00:24:01.30
UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT MEANT, AND
I WAS GETTING HIT WITH ONE THING
00:24:01.30\00:24:06.47
AFTER ANOTHER AFTER ANOTHER
AFTER ANOTHER, AND MY HUSBAND
00:24:06.47\00:24:09.14
WAS -- THERE WAS
STUFF IN THE RELATIONSHIP.
00:24:09.14\00:24:12.68
HAYE KNOW AS A GOOD CHRISTIAN,
THAT WE DON'T TALK ABOUT
00:24:12.68\00:24:16.48
STRUGGLES IN MARRIAGES, BUT
THAT'S OVER TONIGHT, SO WE WERE
00:24:16.48\00:24:21.49
HAVING STRUGGLES IN OUR
RELATIONSHIP, AND IT WAS ONE
00:24:21.49\00:24:26.36
THING AFTER ANOTHER. AND
MY MOTHER-IN-LAW MOVED IN,
00:24:26.36\00:24:31.13
AND THAT'S REALLY TOUGH,
AND WHAT WAS HARD ABOUT MY
00:24:31.13\00:24:34.84
MOTHER-IN-LAW, IS YOU HEARD
MY BACKGROUND THAT I'M NOT THE
00:24:34.84\00:24:39.31
FIRST CHOICE FOR
ANY MOTHER WIH HER SON.
00:24:39.31\00:24:43.18
IF YOU WERE TO DRAW A NAME
OUT OF A HAT, IT WOULDN'T BE A
00:24:43.18\00:24:49.48
HOMELESS HEROIN
ADDICT THAT HAS THIS FAMILY.
00:24:49.48\00:24:52.65
>> YOUR MOTHER-IN-LAW
IS VERY SOPHISTICATED --
00:24:52.65\00:24:56.59
>> VERY SOFT US
-- SOPHISTICATED.
00:24:56.59\00:25:02.96
SO IT WAS TOUGH FORHER TO ACCEPT
ME FOR YEARS, SO MOVING IN, ALL
00:25:02.96\00:25:09.07
OF THOSE TRIGGERS CAME UP, AND
I THINK THE DEVIL REALLY TOOK
00:25:09.07\00:25:13.07
ADVANTAGE OF THAT, SO I STARTED
LOOKING AT SOME THINGS, AND
00:25:13.07\00:25:17.11
SOMEBODY SAID YOU NEED TO STUDY
DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIPS
00:25:17.11\00:25:20.88
AND -- AND -- AND I DID, AND ONE
DAY, I WAS HAVING SUCH A TOUGH
00:25:20.88\00:25:28.92
TIME, REALLY TOUGH TIME, AND
I CAME IN THE HOUSE, AND I SAID,
00:25:28.92\00:25:34.73
YOU KNOW, GOD, I DON'T KNOW IF
I'M GOING TO GET THROUGH THIS,
00:25:34.73\00:25:37.87
AND I REMEMBER GOING TO OKLAHOMA
ACADEMY AND -- AND -- AND
00:25:37.87\00:25:41.64
I -- THEY GAVE ME A BIBLE AND
ALL OF THE KIDS SIGNED IT, SO I
00:25:41.64\00:25:47.08
WENT AND FOUND THE BIBLE
AND OPENED IT UP, AND GOD SAID I
00:25:47.08\00:25:50.48
WANT YOU TO READ EVERYTHING THAT
THESE KIDS WROTE, AND WHAT WAS
00:25:50.48\00:25:54.62
INCREDIBLE TO ME ABOUT THIS
BIBLE IS I HAD GONE TO DO A WEEK
00:25:54.62\00:25:58.09
OF PRAYER AT THE
ACADEMY, AND I LOVE THEM.
00:25:58.09\00:26:02.59
I LOVE WORKING WITH YOUNG ADULTS
OR YOUNG KIDS, AND -- AND -- SO
00:26:02.59\00:26:07.30
I WENT TO DO A WEEK OF PRAYER,
AND I HAD JUST BEEN DIAGNOSED
00:26:07.30\00:26:11.27
WITH CANCER, SO IT WAS ANOTHER
TIME THAT WAS REALLY TOUGH.
00:26:11.27\00:26:15.77
AND WHEN I SAID TO THESE
KIDS -- THEY SAID, YOU KNOW, HOW
00:26:15.77\00:26:19.34
ARE YOU, AND WHAT
HAS BEEN GOING ON?
00:26:19.34\00:26:21.78
AND I WAS GOING TO SAY
IT NONCHALANTLY THAT I JUST
00:26:21.78\00:26:29.35
DIAGNOSED WITH LEUKEMIA,
AND WHEN I SAID IT, I TEARED UP.
00:26:29.35\00:26:33.72
AND YOU KNOW ME, I'M NOT
A CRIER, I AM JUST NOT THAT
00:26:33.72\00:26:39.33
PERSON. AND ONE
OF THE KIDS SAID TO
00:26:39.33\00:26:41.80
ANOTHER ONE, THEY WHISPERED
SOMETHING, AND THEN THEY SAID,
00:26:41.80\00:26:45.57
WOULD YOU MIND IF I
SANG A SONG FOR YOU?
00:26:45.57\00:26:48.84
AND I THOUGHT, YEAH. SO
THEY PUT ME IN A CHAIR IN THE
00:26:48.84\00:26:52.77
MIDDLE OF THE ROOM, AND THEY
GATHERED AROUND ME, AND THEY SAW
00:26:52.77\00:26:56.95
THE FEAR IN ME, AND THEY SAID
I THINK YOU FORGOT HOW GOOD GOD
00:26:56.95\00:27:05.19
IS. AND THEY SANG
THIS SONG THAT WAS
00:27:05.19\00:27:07.92
ABOUT THE GREATNESS OF GOD, AND
THE HOLY SPIRIT WAS THERE, AND
00:27:07.92\00:27:11.36
IT WAS SO INCREDIBLE, AND I
STARTED TO CRY, AND ONE BY ONE
00:27:11.36\00:27:15.26
THE KIDS STARTED TO CRY, AND
WHEN THEY STARTED TO CRY, IT'S
00:27:15.26\00:27:20.30
HARD TO SING, SO THEY FELL ON
THEIR KNEES, AND ONE BY ONE WE
00:27:20.30\00:27:25.47
WERE ON THE FLOOR SOBBING
ABOUT THE GREATNESS OF GOD.
00:27:25.47\00:27:29.74
SO AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE,
WHEN I'M LOOKING AT ALL OF THIS
00:27:29.74\00:27:35.08
DYSFUNCTION, I'M REMEMBERING
THE GREATNESS OF GOD, AND BLAD H
00:27:35.08\00:27:39.39
BRAD HAH H H -- BRAD AND I HAD
SUCH A DIFFICULT TIME, AND THERE
00:27:39.39\00:27:47.60
WAS ONE STRESS AFTER ANOTHER
AFTER ANOTHER, AND I JUST WANT
00:27:47.60\00:27:51.00
TO SAY TO ANYBODY OUT THERE, BE
CAREFUL HOW THE DEVIL LEADS YOU,
00:27:51.00\00:27:55.40
BECAUSE I THINK WHAT HE DID WITH
ME, BECAUSE I WAS SO INSECURE,
00:27:55.40\00:28:00.48
AND ALL OF MY TRIGGERS WERE
COMING OUT, AND I WAS DEALING
00:28:00.48\00:28:04.55
WITH THIS HOUSEHOLD WITH
NOT KNOWING HOW TO ACT OR IF I'M
00:28:04.55\00:28:09.45
EVEN WANTED, THE DEVIL SAID
YOU ARE RIGHT TO BE UPSET ABOUT
00:28:09.45\00:28:14.92
THIS, YOU KNOW? >>
SOMETIMES READING A BOOK
00:28:14.92\00:28:19.39
ABOUT IT CAN MAKE IT WORSE?
>> WELL, IT MADE IT WORSE.
00:28:19.39\00:28:24.73
AND I'M STUDYING ABOUT
DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP, AND
00:28:24.73\00:28:29.54
I GOT SO GOOD AT THE STUDIES
THAT SOME OF THE COUNSELORS FROM
00:28:29.54\00:28:34.08
THE VA HOSPITAL SAID
WOULD YOU DO IN-SERVICES.
00:28:34.08\00:28:37.71
YOU KNOW? YOU KNOW HOW THAT IS.
00:28:37.71\00:28:39.25
YOU STUDY IN THAT SAME WAY, SO
PRETTY SOON I THOUGHT YOU KNOW
00:28:39.25\00:28:46.89
WHAT, I THINK I JUST NEED
TO -LEAVE, YOU KNOW? >> THAT'S
00:28:46.89\00:28:55.10
PRETTY SERIOUS. >> YEAH.
AND ONE DAY SOMETHING HAPPENED
00:28:55.10\00:28:57.10
AND IT WAS HORRIBLE, AND IT WAS
JUST SUCH AN INTENSE DAY, THAT I
00:28:57.10\00:29:03.04
THOUGHT, I'M JUT LEAVING.
AND I GOT IN MY CAR, AND I'M
00:29:03.04\00:29:07.61
DRIVING AWAY -- AND I JUST HAVE
TO SAY, I'M GOING TO KISS GOD ON
00:29:07.61\00:29:12.55
HIS FACE WHEN I SEE HIM.-SO I'M
DRIVING AWAY AND THERE IS THIS
HUGE ROADBLOCK, AND I TURN
00:29:12.55\00:29:21.86
THE CORNER AND THERE IS ANOTHER
ROADBLOCK, AND I GET TO THIS
00:29:21.86\00:29:24.23
PLACE WHERE I'M GOING TO GET
SOMETHING TO EAT AND GO TO THE
00:29:24.23\00:29:28.03
AIRPORT AND FLY OUT,
AND MY CAR BREAKS DOWN.
00:29:28.03\00:29:31.07
AND I'M THINKING, I THINK
THE DEVIL IS JUST STOPPING ME.
00:29:31.07\00:29:35.64
BUT IT WAS GOD.
AND I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
00:29:35.64\00:29:38.47
SO FINALLY I CALL A RENT A CAR
PLACE, AND I THOUGHT I'M GOING
00:29:38.47\00:29:43.21
TO RENT A CAR, WELL, IT WAS 5
MINUTES AFTER 6:00 AND THE PLACE
00:29:43.21\00:29:49.32
CLOSED AT 6:00. AND
I'M THINKING THIS IS
00:29:49.32\00:29:52.95
RIDICULOUS SO NOW I HAVE TO
CALL-pBRAD. AND ONE THING LEAD
00:29:52.95\00:29:58.63
TO ANOTHER AND A FRIEND OF MINE
-- AND IT WAS REALLY
INTERESTING, I LEFT
00:29:58.63\00:30:03.00
FOR THE WEEKEND, AND WITHIN A
COUPLE OF DAYS BRAD AND HIS MOM
00:30:03.00\00:30:08.37
OFFERED TO BUY MY HOUSE AND PUT
IT IN THEIR NAME, I MINE IT WAS
00:30:08.37\00:30:11.94
SO BIZARRE, IT JUST HAPPENED SO
FAST AND IT WAS SO CRAZY, SO NOW
00:30:11.94\00:30:16.95
THE REJECTED KID IN ME IS VERY
HURT, LIKE I CAN BE THROWN OUT,
00:30:16.95\00:30:23.12
AND I MEAN IT WAS
JUST A REALLY TOUGH THING.
00:30:23.12\00:30:26.92
AND I RAN INTO A FRIEND OF
MINE JOE, AND HE IS JUST A WISE
00:30:26.92\00:30:31.29
GUY -- NOT WISE GUY -- HE IS
JUST A WISE COUNSELOR, MAN OF
00:30:31.29\00:30:36.83
GOD. AND HE SAID
CHERI, YOU KNOW WHAT
00:30:36.83\00:30:39.30
I LOVE ABOUT YOU
-- AND I THOUGHT WHY?
00:30:39.30\00:30:42.04
BECAUSE I'M NOT
FEELING VERY LOVABLE AT ALL.
00:30:42.04\00:30:45.81
MY WHOLE WORLD IS FALLING APART.
AND HE SAID I LOVE THE FACT THAT
00:30:45.81\00:30:50.45
YOU LISTENED
FOR GOD TO LEAD YOU.
00:30:50.45\00:30:53.35
YOU HEAR HIS VOICE, AND I HAVE
ALWAYS LOVED THAT ABOUT YOU, AND
00:30:53.35\00:30:57.89
I SAID -- YOU KNOW, I LOOKED
AT HIM LIKE WHERE ARE YOU GOING
00:30:57.89\00:31:02.69
WITH THIS? AND WHEN
I FIRST MET HIM, HE HAD
00:31:02.69\00:31:05.79
LEFT THE CHURCH, AND HE AND
HIS WIFE DECIDED TO COME TO THE
00:31:05.79\00:31:10.63
CHURCH ONE MORE TIME.
AND THEY SAID WE ARE GOING TO
00:31:10.63\00:31:17.01
SIT NEXT TO SOMEBODY AND SAY
WHAT DO YOU LOVE ABOUT GOD AND
00:31:17.01\00:31:21.64
IF THEY HAVE A LAME
ANSWER, WE'RE OUT OF THERE.
00:31:21.64\00:31:25.05
AND HE SAID DID GOD
SAY YOU COULD LEAVE BRAD?
00:31:25.05\00:31:29.05
AND HE JUST STOPPED TALKING.
AND I WAS SO MAD BECAUSE I
00:31:29.05\00:31:33.72
WANTED TO LIE.
BUT IT WASN'T TRUE.
00:31:33.72\00:31:36.59
AND HE SAID UNLESS GOD
SAYS YOU NEED TO GO HOME.
00:31:36.59\00:31:42.10
AND IT WAS THE
HARDEST THING I EVER DID.
00:31:42.10\00:31:45.60
BUT I WENT HOME, AND NOW
I HAVE TO STUDY GOD -- WHAT
00:31:45.60\00:31:49.34
HAPPENED -- WHAT HAPPENED THAT I
COULD FEEL SO RIGHT, AND I HOPE
00:31:49.34\00:31:54.01
I AM TALKING TO SOMEBODY, BUT I
CAN FEEL SO RIGHT, I GET ALL OF
00:31:54.01\00:31:57.98
THE BOOKS AND I'M SO RIGHT,
EVERY ONE OF THEM BACKED ME UP,
00:31:57.98\00:32:02.55
I DIDN'T EXAGGERATION ON THE
DISFUNCTION, AND HOW COULD I BE
00:32:02.55\00:32:07.39
SO RIGHT AND BE
SO WRONG SPIRITUALLY.
00:32:07.39\00:32:11.46
AND I HAD TO ASK THAT QUESTION.
AND GOD TOOK ME TO THE STORY OF
00:32:11.46\00:32:16.36
DAVID. >> UH-HUH.
00:32:16.36\00:32:18.30
>> AND SO I GO TO DAVID, AND HE
TAKES ME TOO, THERE WAS A TIME
00:32:18.30\00:32:23.91
IN DAVID'S LIFE WHERE HE WAS
SO TIRED AND -- AND HE WAS IN
00:32:23.91\00:32:28.24
BATTLE, AND HE LOOKED UP, AND
HE IS FIGHTING, AND HE LOOKED UP
00:32:28.24\00:32:33.42
AND HE SEES GOLIATH, AND I THINK
STUNS HIM, HE'S TIRED, HE IS
00:32:33.42\00:32:42.49
WEARY. HE IS LOOKING UP.
00:32:42.49\00:32:45.96
AND THE GUY BEHIND HIM ACTUALLY
HAS TO KILL HIM, AND IT WAS THE
00:32:45.96\00:32:51.70
SON OF GOLIATH OR
THE COUSIN OF GOLIATH.
00:32:51.70\00:32:57.67
IT'S IN 2 SAMUEL. SO
DAVID RAN INTO A LOT OF
00:32:57.67\00:33:01.51
PEOPLE THAT
LOOKED JUST LIKE GOLIATH.
00:33:01.51\00:33:07.98
BECAUSE HE KILLED THE GUY'S
FATHER OR BROTHER OR COUSIN, AND
00:33:07.98\00:33:12.15
ONE THING AFTER ANOTHER, HE
STARTED TO BELIEVE, I BELIEVE,
00:33:12.15\00:33:15.79
THAT AM I EVER
GOING TO WIN THIS BATTLE?
00:33:15.79\00:33:21.96
AND HE HAD WON THE BATTLE.
THIS WASN'T THE SAME BATTLE.
00:33:21.96\00:33:25.33
BUT IN 2 SAMUEL 11:1, EVERYBODY
IS GOING TO GO OUT TO WAR -- HE
00:33:25.33\00:33:32.17
SENDS EVERYBODY OUT TO
WAR, AND AS A KING, IT'S TIME TO
00:33:32.17\00:33:35.68
GO -- YOU KNOW,
THE KING GOES, RIGHT?
00:33:35.68\00:33:38.25
BUT THIS TIME HE DOESN'T.
HE STAYS BACK AND TAKES A NAP.
00:33:38.25\00:33:42.95
>> UH-HUH. INFORM
00:33:42.95\00:33:43.99
>> ARE YOU KIDDING ME? HE
TAKES A NAP BECAUSE IT SAYS
00:33:43.99\00:33:48.59
IN THAT CHAPTER THAT HE
GOT UP TOWARDS EVENING TIME.
00:33:48.59\00:33:52.66
SO HIS MAN ARE BEING KILLED
AT WAR, AND HE IS TAKING A NAP.
00:33:52.66\00:33:57.90
SO GOD WAS TAKING ME TO THAT
PLACE WHERE HE GOT DISCOURAGED
00:33:57.90\00:34:04.04
IN PROVERBS WHERE IT SAYS THAT
ALL OF A SUDDEN WE GET SICK WHEN
00:34:04.04\00:34:09.41
WE GET
DISCOURAGED AND WE LOSE HOPE.
00:34:09.41\00:34:11.91
SO I WAS READING THIS STORY, AND
I WAS SO THERE, AND THE DEVIL IS
00:34:11.91\00:34:16.55
SO STRATEGIC, SO HE LITERALLY
OPPRESSES IN SUCH A WAY THAT WE
00:34:16.55\00:34:24.43
THINK WE'RE FOLLOWING TRUTH
WHEN WE START TO FOLLOW ERROR.
00:34:24.43\00:34:28.46
SO I END UP READING
THIS STORY ABOUT DAVID.
00:34:28.46\00:34:32.60
HE SEES BATHSHEBA, HE GETS HER
PREGNANT, AND ALL OF THE STUFF
00:34:32.60\00:34:38.37
THAT TURNS FOR HIM, BUT HE JUZ
JUST TIRED AND -- WEARY, AND GOD
00:34:38.37\00:34:46.31
SAY DO NOT GET DISCOURAGED.
YOU HAVE WON THESE BATTLES.
00:34:46.31\00:34:50.89
I HAVE WON BATTLE AFTER BATTLE
AFTER BATTLE THROUGH CHRIST.
00:34:50.89\00:34:56.12
NOT BECAUSE I WAS SO SMART
OR WISE, BUT GOD HAS BEEN SO
00:34:56.12\00:35:00.96
FAITHFUL, AND WHEN THE DEVIL
TRIGGERS YOU AND SAYS YOU NEVER
00:35:00.96\00:35:05.77
WON, THAT IS A LIE. SO
I HAD TO APOLOGIZE TO BRAD
00:35:05.77\00:35:10.27
THAT I JUST GOT SO LOST IN MY
TRIGGERS, AND I WANTED RELIEF,
00:35:10.27\00:35:14.84
AND I STARTED TO FOLLOW WHAT THE
WORLD SAID THIS IS THE ANSWER,
00:35:14.84\00:35:19.15
AND THE DEVIL LITERALLY GAVE
ME AS MUCH FODDER AS I NEEDED TO
00:35:19.15\00:35:23.92
START THIS FIRE. SO I
SAID TO BRAD, WOULD YOU
00:35:23.92\00:35:28.09
PLEASE FORGIVE ME. I
ALSO HAD TO GO TO MY CHURCH,
00:35:28.09\00:35:31.43
BECAUSE WHEN WE LET OURSELVES
GET DISCOURAGED AND PULL AWAY,
00:35:31.43\00:35:35.73
EVERYONE THAT LOVES YOU --
I HAVE AN INCREDIBLE CHURCH
00:35:35.73\00:35:39.23
FAMILY, INCREDIBLE, SO I STOOD
IN FRONT OF THE CHURCH, AND I
00:35:39.23\00:35:43.41
SAID WOULD YOU PLEASE FORGIVE
ME, FOR EVERYTHING I PUT YOU
00:35:43.41\00:35:47.41
THROUGH WITH ALL OF MY CRAZINESS
FOR THAT YEAR, SO WE CRIED
00:35:47.41\00:35:51.41
TOGETHER AND HELD EACH OTHER,
BUT WHAT I LEARNED IS THE BATTLE
00:35:51.41\00:35:54.92
IS VERY REAL, AND -- AND -- AND
3 NOT ONLY IS THE BATTLE REAL,
00:35:54.92\00:36:00.79
BUT SATAN SAYS IF -- IF
YOU ALLOW YOURSELF TO START TO
00:36:00.79\00:36:05.53
RESCUE YOURSELF, YOU IN TROUBLE,
AND YOU HAVE GOD TO TURN -- GOT
00:36:05.53\00:36:11.17
TO TURN IT TO GOD. >>
WHEN WE CAN COME TO THE LORD
00:36:11.17\00:36:14.77
WITH OPEN GAPING WOUNDS AND
REJECTION AS A CHILD -- I HAD
00:36:14.77\00:36:18.97
THAT FEAR OF ABANDONMENT
AND REJECTION AND ALL OF THAT.
00:36:18.97\00:36:22.91
THAT IS SOMETHING -- THAT IS
A VERY LARGE OPEN GAPING WOUND,
00:36:22.91\00:36:27.85
AND GOD HEALS THAT, BUT YOU
STILL HAVE THE SCAR THERE, AND
00:36:27.85\00:36:31.99
IT'S LIKE SATAN KNOWS HOW TO
COME IN AND THE VERY THING THAT
00:36:31.99\00:36:40.40
WAS YOUR WORST FEAR AND AS YOU
SAID WHEN YOU ARE TIRED, WHEN
00:36:40.40\00:36:44.87
YOU ARE DOWN, WHEN EVERYTHING
STARTS PILING ON, THEN HE GOES
00:36:44.87\00:36:49.34
FOR THAT TRIGGER POINT, AND
THERE'S ONLY ONE TIME IN MY LIFE
00:36:49.34\00:36:54.68
THAT I WAS AT THAT POINT, ONLY
BEEN TO A COUNSELOR ONE TIME,
00:36:54.68\00:36:58.78
AND I READ THE BOOK, AND I
WENT INTO THE COUNSELOR, AND I'M
00:36:58.78\00:37:02.92
SITTING THERE, I HAVE THE BOOK
OUT, LINED AND EVERYTHING, AND
00:37:02.92\00:37:06.32
RIGHT AT THE END OF THE HOUR,
I BURST -- I MEAN THE TEARS
00:37:06.32\00:37:14.86
STARTED, AND
I'M GOING EXCUSE ME.
00:37:14.86\00:37:17.37
AND HE SAID FINALLY.
HE SAID I FELT LIKE I WAS
00:37:17.37\00:37:21.40
SITTING HERE TALKING TO ANOTHER
COUNSELOR, BUT IT WAS -- IT
00:37:21.40\00:37:24.67
WAS -- WHEN THINGS START PILING
UP, AND JUST LISTEN -- THERE ARE
00:37:24.67\00:37:29.31
SO MANY OF US THAT WE HAVE
HAD THINGS THAT HAPPENED IN THE
00:37:29.31\00:37:33.45
PAST, AND GOD HAS MADE US
OVER COMERS, BUT DON'T EVER FEEL
00:37:33.45\00:37:40.16
LIKE -- SATAN KNOWS YOUR NUMBER,
AND HE IS GOING TO COME -- THE
00:37:40.16\00:37:45.93
ONE PLACE THAT WAS THE MOST
PAINFUL THING IN YOUR LIFE, HE
00:37:45.93\00:37:48.93
IS GOING TO COME, WHATEVER IT
IS, THAT IS WHERE HE'LL GET YOU
00:37:48.93\00:37:54.47
IF YOU ARE NOT GIVING EVERYTHING
TO GOD, IF YOU ARE HOLDING ON,
00:37:54.47\00:37:59.44
TRYING TO FIX IT
YOURSELF, AND REA
00:37:59.44\00:38:03.85
READING SECULAR BOOKS TOO.
>> THE KNOWLEDGE I GOT FROM
00:38:03.85\00:38:09.75
THESE BOOKS, IT WAS GOOD
INFORMATION, BUT I FORGOT THE
00:38:09.75\00:38:13.62
GREATNESS OF GOD. >> AMEN.
00:38:13.62\00:38:16.39
>> LET'S SAY BRAD PUT ME UNDER
THE SAME SCRUTINY I PUT HIM
00:38:16.39\00:38:24.53
UNDER, I WOULDN'T HAVE
SURVIVED. THE DYSFUNCTION THAT I
00:38:24.53\00:38:29.77
PERSONALLY HAD, AND THE THINGS
THAT BRAD HAS TO DEAL WIT ME IS
00:38:29.77\00:38:34.61
ALL TRUE, AND I DON'T THINK WE
CAN HOLD UP UNDER THE SCRUTINY
00:38:34.61\00:38:39.58
THAT THE DEVIL CAN PUT US UNDER,
AND IF WE START DOING THAT TO
00:38:39.58\00:38:44.12
EACH OTHER, NONE
OF US WOULD STAND.
00:38:44.12\00:38:46.25
SO WHAT GOD SAID TO ME AFTER A
YEAR -- BECAUSE THAT WAS A YEAR
00:38:46.25\00:38:50.53
OF MY LIFE IS THAT YOU HAVE
TO -- INSTEAD OF STUDYING ABOUT
00:38:50.53\00:38:54.76
THE DYSFUNCTION OF THE PEOPLE
THAT YOU LOVE, STUDY THE BIBLE.
00:38:54.76\00:38:58.87
GET BACK INTO THE WORD OF GOD,
AND WHAT WAS -- WHAT I WOULD
00:38:58.87\00:39:03.10
LOVE TO SAY -- I WOULD
LOVE TO SAY, OH, NO, I WAS DOING
00:39:03.10\00:39:08.81
DEVOTIONS EVERY
DAY, BUT I WASN'T.
00:39:08.81\00:39:11.38
I WAS EVEN LISTENING TO
BOOK TAPES AS I WAS DRIVING.
00:39:11.38\00:39:14.82
I WAS MAKING SURE I WAS MAKING
THE RIGHT DECISION, SO I WAS
00:39:14.82\00:39:18.39
REALLY LOOKING AT ALL OF THIS
STUFF, AND THE DEVIL JUST HAD ME
00:39:18.39\00:39:23.43
RUNNING, AND I CAN'T -- I THINK
FOR ME, BECAUSE I HAVE SUCH A
00:39:23.43\00:39:30.93
STRONG RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD,
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED IN SO
00:39:30.93\00:39:35.24
MANY WAYS, THAT I HAD NO IDEA
HOW STRATEGIC THE ENEMY IS TO
00:39:35.24\00:39:40.98
FIND THOSE CRACKS. AND
ONE OF THE THINGS ABOUT
00:39:40.98\00:39:44.25
ANSWERING TO ONE ANOTHER, AND
REALLY HAVING, YOU KNOW, FRIENDS
00:39:44.25\00:39:48.02
AROUND, AND PEOPLE THAT KNOW YOU
AROUND, AND PEOPLE THAT YOU ARE
00:39:48.02\00:39:52.09
ACCOUNTABLE TO, IS THAT PEOPLE
CAN SAY, HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT, BE
00:39:52.09\00:39:57.79
CAREFUL WITH THIS? >> I
WANT TO FINISH THE STORY.
00:39:57.79\00:40:01.30
I BROKE DOWN CRYING. HE
GAVE ME AN QUESTIONNAIRE AND
00:40:01.30\00:40:07.27
SEND ME HOME. AND IT
WAS ALL OF THE NEGATIVE
00:40:07.27\00:40:10.91
THINGS ABOUT YOUR PARENTS AND
CHILDHOOD AND ALL OF THIS STUFF.
00:40:10.91\00:40:15.34
AND I WAS STARTING TO FILL THIS
OUT, AND THESE ARE THINGS THAT
00:40:15.34\00:40:20.32
GOD HAD HEALED ME LONG BEFORE.
AND I WAS -- I GUESS IN MY 30S,
00:40:20.32\00:40:25.25
BUT AS I STARTED FOCUSING AS
YOU SAID ON ALL OF THE NEGATIVE
00:40:25.25\00:40:29.92
THINGS, IT WAS LIKE -- YOU KNOW,
AT FIRST I WAS OKAY, AND PRETTY
00:40:29.92\00:40:37.07
SOON IT WAS LIKE YOU WERE
OPENING THAT SCAR, AND ABOUT
00:40:37.07\00:40:40.50
HALFWAY THROUGH THIS, I'M
GETTING INTO A GOOD PITY PARTY,
00:40:40.50\00:40:44.37
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN THIS IS WHAT
I HEAR FROM THE LORD IS, YOU
00:40:44.37\00:40:48.71
KNOW, TURN YOUR EYES
TO ME, TRUSTING IN ME.
00:40:48.71\00:40:52.68
I'M GOING TO GIVE
YOU PERFECT PEACE.
00:40:52.68\00:40:55.62
THIS IS ALL FROM THE PAST. I
HAVE DONE A NEW THING IN YOU.
00:40:55.62\00:41:00.72
DO YOU NOT PERCEIVE IT.
AND THIS IS WHAT -- I THINK WE
00:41:00.72\00:41:04.16
HAVE TO BE SO CAREFUL WHEN WE
REHASH THE NEGATIVE OF THE PAST.
00:41:04.16\00:41:08.40
>> AND -- AND TO ME, I --
I HEAR WHAT YOU ARE SAYING.
00:41:08.40\00:41:11.97
I DON'T -- I'M RIGHT ON THE
EDGE, BECAUSE I WORK WITH SO
00:41:11.97\00:41:15.80
MANY PEOPLE -- BECAUSE I WORK
WITH AT-RISK FOLKS THAT HAVE
00:41:15.80\00:41:21.31
PASSIONS THAT ARE CRAZY,
AND THEY HAVE TO GET OUT OUT.
00:41:21.31\00:41:24.71
AND I THINK THERE ARE TIMES THAT
THROUGH CHRIST LOOKING AT THAT
00:41:24.71\00:41:29.05
STUFF AND SURRENTING THAT STUFF,
AND FORGIVING THE PEOPLE THAT
00:41:29.05\00:41:34.02
HAVE INJURED YOU IN YOUR
LIFE, THAT IS ALL GOOD --
00:41:34.02\00:41:37.16
>> BUT I HAD DONE
THAT. >> -- THE DEVIL IS VERY
00:41:37.16\00:41:42.53
STRATEGIC IN THAT WHEN HE
SEES THAT YOU ARE -- THT HE HAS
00:41:42.53\00:41:46.53
HIJACKED YOU -- I
WAS HIJACKED FOR A YEAR.
00:41:46.53\00:41:49.67
>> YOU WERE. FOR A WHOLE YEAR?
00:41:49.67\00:41:51.77
>> FOR A WHOLE YEAR
BEFORE I WALKED OUT.
00:41:51.77\00:41:54.28
>> WOW. >> SO WHAT
IS REALLY INTERESTING
00:41:54.28\00:41:56.54
WITH BRAD AND I BEING ABLE
TO LOOK AT EACHOR AND REPENT TO
00:41:56.54\00:42:02.25
EACH OTHER AND TO GOD IS TO LOOK
AT EACH OTHER AND REALIZE THT
00:42:02.25\00:42:06.86
WE ARE NOT -- WE CANNOT STAND
OUTSIDE OF OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH
00:42:06.86\00:42:12.36
CHRIST, ESPECIALLY
DEALING WITH ANY KIND OF STRESS.
00:42:12.36\00:42:15.30
>> AMEN. >> SO
IT WAS AN INCREDIBLE
00:42:15.30\00:42:19.50
LEARNING EXPERIENCE TO ME, AND
LOOKING BACK ON DAVID AND THE
00:42:19.50\00:42:25.64
BATTLE -- AND I'M SO GRATEFUL
THAT THOSE THINGS ARE THE BIBLE
00:42:25.64\00:42:31.21
THAT PEOPLE DIDN'T JUST TELL ALL
OF THEIR GOOD STORIES, BECAUSE I
00:42:31.21\00:42:36.08
DON'T THINK I WOULD
HAVE SURVIVED THIS ONE.
00:42:36.08\00:42:38.42
>> THAT'S HOW YOU
KNOW IT'S GOD INSPIRED.
00:42:38.42\00:42:42.12
BECAUSE HE LETS YOU SEE -- YOU
SEE US HERE AT 3ABN, AND WE LIVE
00:42:42.12\00:42:47.83
IN A BUBBLE. -- WE
WORK WITH GOOD CHRISTIAN
00:42:47.83\00:42:58.14
PEOPLE, BUT NONE OF US ARE
PERFECT, AND EVERYBODY THINKS IF
00:42:58.14\00:43:02.91
YOU ARE MINISTERING,
THAT YOU ARE PERFECT.
00:43:02.91\00:43:06.68
NO, YOU ARE NOT.
WE ALL HAVE ISSUES.
00:43:06.68\00:43:09.52
>> I WOULD LIKE TO BE
PERFECT FOR JUST 24 HOURS.
00:43:09.52\00:43:13.36
>> YOU WILL SOME DAY. >>
THE DAY AFTER RESURRECTION.
00:43:13.36\00:43:18.23
>> YOU GOT A
GLIMPSE OF THAT. >> YEAH.
00:43:18.23\00:43:22.33
>> HOW IS EVERYTHING
GOING WITH YOUR CANCER?
00:43:22.33\00:43:24.93
>> I GOT DIAGNOSED IN 2006.
I HAVE NEVER HAD ANY PROBLEMS
00:43:24.93\00:43:34.64
WITH IT. I SAW AN
ONCOLOGIST EVERY THREE
00:43:34.64\00:43:41.55
MONTHS FOR TWO YEARS, AND
FINALLY, I SAID DO WE HAVE TO
00:43:41.55\00:43:45.85
KEEP DOING THIS. SO I
HAVE NEVER BEEN TREATED, OR
00:43:45.85\00:43:51.39
HAD ANY PROBLEMS
WITH IT. >> OKAY.
00:43:51.39\00:43:53.86
WE HAVE ABOUT 13 MINUTES LEFT.
DO YOU WANT TO GO AHEAD AND JUMP
00:43:53.86\00:43:59.23
RIGHT INTO THE CHANGING FACE OF
ADDICTION SO WE CAN GIVE THEM OF
00:43:59.23\00:44:04.34
HINT OF WHAT IS
COMING UP IN THE SECOND HOUR?
00:44:04.34\00:44:08.28
>> I DO. IN THE
MINISTRY I HAVE, ONE OF
00:44:08.28\00:44:11.71
THE THINGS THEY LOVE IS THE FACT
THAT EVERY TIME WE GET PULLED
00:44:11.71\00:44:15.75
INTO AREAS THAT REALLY ROCK
US IS THAT WE ARE EITHER AFRAID,
00:44:15.75\00:44:22.06
ANGRY, LONELY, THOSE
THINGS DRIVE US TO TAKE CARE OF
00:44:22.06\00:44:25.36
OURSELVES. YOU
KNOW, WHETHER IT'S -- EVEN
00:44:25.36\00:44:27.13
WITH EATING DISORDERS, LIKE
IF I'M HAVING A HAD TIME, AND I
00:44:27.13\00:44:31.73
THINK I THINK THERE'S A GALLON
OF ICE CREAM IN THE FRIG, I
00:44:31.73\00:44:36.07
ALREADY FEEL BETTER, SO WE
TRY TO TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES.
00:44:36.07\00:44:40.11
SO I REALY HAVE OVER THE
YEARS LOOKED AT ADDICTION.
00:44:40.11\00:44:45.85
I WAS AN ADDICT,
MY FAMILY ARE ADDICTS.
00:44:45.85\00:44:51.52
GRAND PARENTS DIED IN THEIR
ADDICTION WITH ALCOHOL AND SO I
00:44:51.52\00:44:57.99
REALLY LOOKED AT
ADDICTION -- YOU KNOW, WE HAVE
00:44:57.99\00:45:01.86
BEEN ALL OVER THE WORLD LOOKING
AT HOW WE LIVE WITH OUR VARIOUS
00:45:01.86\00:45:07.27
ADDICTIONS, AND THIS LAST
YEAR, WHAT I HAVE SEEN IS WE ARE
00:45:07.27\00:45:11.44
DEALING WITH A GENERATION
NOW THAT IS THE MOST ADDICTED
00:45:11.44\00:45:14.84
GENERATION IN THE HISTORY OF
THE UNITED STATES, AND -- OR THE
00:45:14.84\00:45:18.85
WORLD, I THINK, AND THAT IS,
THIS YOUNGER GENERATION X AND Y
00:45:18.85\00:45:35.23
AND NOW Z. >> JUST
IN THEIR ADDICTION TO
00:45:35.23\00:45:39.27
THEIR DEVICES. I'M
LOOKING AT A GENERATION AND
00:45:39.27\00:45:43.14
I GET TO SPEAK AT HIGH SCHOOLS,
ELEMENTARY SCHOOLS, COLLEGES,
00:45:43.14\00:45:54.65
AND THESE KIDS ARE THE BEST.
AND WE'RE NOT LOOKING AT IT IN
00:45:54.65\00:45:59.79
THE SAME WAY WE LOOK AT DRUG
ADDICTIONS, AND YOU KNOW -- AND
00:45:59.79\00:46:04.23
I HOPE I HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO SAY
THIS, BUT SIGMUND FREUD WHEN HE
00:46:04.23\00:46:12.73
FIRST DID COCAINE, HE JUST
THOUGHT THIS IS THE BEST, YOU
00:46:12.73\00:46:16.64
KNOW. AND HE DEALT
WITH DEPRESSION AND
00:46:16.64\00:46:23.48
SOME ANXIETY, AND HE DID A
COUPLE OF SNORTS OF COCAINE, AND
00:46:23.48\00:46:28.95
ALL OF A SUDDEN LIFE WAS GREAT.
AND HE WROTE PAPERS ON IT, AND
00:46:28.95\00:46:35.26
HE WROTE HIS GIRLFRIEND AND
SAID THIS IS SUCH A GOOD THING.
00:46:35.26\00:46:40.20
WELL, A YEAR OR TWO LATER,
HIS NOSE IS BLOWING OUT, HE IS
00:46:40.20\00:46:44.57
HAVING ADDICTION ISSUES THAT ARE
OVER THE TOP, AND HE HAD TO SAY
00:46:44.57\00:46:49.07
THAT THIS IS A NIGHTMARE, AND
THE ONLY WAY -- HE HAD A HOLE IN
00:46:49.07\00:46:53.94
HIS NOSE, AND THE ONLY WAY
TO SMOOTH IT WAS TO SNORT MORE
00:46:53.94\00:47:02.98
COCAINE. AND WITH
SOME OF OUR ADDICTIONS
00:47:02.98\00:47:06.29
IT'S CLEAR IT TRASHES US, BUT
WITH OUR DEVICE ADDICTIONS IT'S
00:47:06.29\00:47:12.46
NOT QUITE THAT CLEAR, BUT
THE NEUROCHEMICAL CHANGES ARE
00:47:12.46\00:47:17.90
EXACTLY THE SAME. AND
SO WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'LL
00:47:17.90\00:47:21.34
TALK ABOUT WHAT DOES THAT
MEAN THAT THEY ARE THE SAME?
00:47:21.34\00:47:24.61
AND I DON'T WANT TO BE AN
ALARMIST, AND I DON'T WANT TO
00:47:24.61\00:47:28.48
SAY THIS GENERATION IS
LOST, BECAUSE IT'S NOT.
00:47:28.48\00:47:31.05
THEY ARE INCREDIBLE. BUT
I WANT TO PUT A FLAG UP AND
00:47:31.05\00:47:34.55
SAY IT'S TIME TO LOOK AT
THIS AND MAYBE REIGN IN ON SOME
00:47:34.55\00:47:41.36
STUFF. >> I WAS
READING THE OTHER DAY
00:47:41.36\00:47:43.56
THAT THE YOUNG GENERATION IS THE
LONELY ESTROGEN  -- LONELIEST
00:47:43.56\00:47:53.80
GENERATION THAT EVER HAS BEEN.
AND PERSONALLY -- WE WERE AT A
00:47:53.80\00:47:57.54
MALL -- I THINK IT WAS IN
ASH CHRISTMASTIME, AND I WAS
00:47:57.54\00:48:04.48
WATCHING THREE PRETTY
LITTLE GIRLS, AND THEY WERE T
00:48:04.48\00:48:10.72
TALK -- WALKING TOGETHER, AND
TWO OF THEM WERE HAVING SO MUCH
00:48:10.72\00:48:19.79
FUN.-AND THE THIRD LITTLE GIRL
WAS -- AND I MENTIONED TO J.D.,
00:48:19.79\00:48:24.30
I SAID THESE TWO GIRLS ARE
CONNECTING, BUT THIS OTHER GIRL
00:48:24.30\00:48:29.07
IS ARTIFICIALLY CONNECTED, AND I
THINK THAT IS WHAT IS LEADING TO
00:48:29.07\00:48:33.48
ALL OF THIS LONELINESS IS
THEY ARE GETTING SO HOOKED ON
00:48:33.48\00:48:37.78
FACEBOOK, TWITTER, AND IT'S
MEANINGLESS JUNKY STUFF, THERE'S
00:48:37.78\00:48:43.75
NO PERSONAL ONE-ON-ONE RELATION.
AND WE THINK THIS IS JUST THE
00:48:43.75\00:48:49.29
YOUNGER GENERATION
-- >> IT'S ALL OF US.
00:48:49.29\00:48:51.93
>> -- WE HAD A PARTY A FEW YEARS
AGO, AND WE HAD A BUNCH OF THE
00:48:51.93\00:48:58.90
YOUNG PEOPLE FROM 3ABN,
WELL, UP TO 35 YEAR OLDS.
00:48:58.90\00:49:03.17
AND WE WERE SITTING AROUND
TALKING, AND THE NEXT THING I
00:49:03.17\00:49:07.78
KNOW, FIVE OR SIX OF
THEM HAVE GOT -- YOU KNOW.
00:49:07.78\00:49:09.88
AND WE'RE HAVING THIS WONDERFUL
TIME AND LAUGHING, AND THEY
00:49:09.88\00:49:13.48
ARE -- SO THIS IS SOMETHING THAT
I RESISTED THE SMARTPHONE WHEN
00:49:13.48\00:49:20.92
IT FIRST CAME OUT, NOW I
COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT IT, AND
00:49:20.92\00:49:26.03
EVERY TIME IT BINGES
I'M LIKE PAVLOV'S DOG.
00:49:26.03\00:49:32.40
WHEN IT BINGES,
YOU ARE RIGHT THERE.
00:49:32.40\00:49:35.30
>> YEAH. >> AND I
KNOW WE'RE GOING TO
00:49:35.30\00:49:37.34
TALK ABOUT ALL OF THESE
THINGS WHEN WE COME BACK.
00:49:37.34\00:49:40.71
BUT WHAT WOULD YOU SAY HAS
BEEN -- SINCE THAT DAY THAT YOU
00:49:40.71\00:49:45.51
WERE AT OKLAHOMA UNIVERSITY,
AND YOU WERE REMINDED OF THE
00:49:45.51\00:49:52.12
GREATNESS OF GOD, BESIDES
THE RESTORATION -- I MEAN, THE
00:49:52.12\00:49:58.79
AMAZING RESTORATION OF
YOUR MARRIAGE, WHAT HAS BEEN THE
00:49:58.79\00:50:02.93
GREATEST JOY THAT
GOD HAS BROUGHT TO YOU?
00:50:02.93\00:50:05.27
>> WELL, MY
DAUGHTER JUST HAD A BABY.
00:50:05.27\00:50:08.14
AND I -- I GOT TO BE IN THE
DELIVERY ROOM, AND THIS CHILD
00:50:08.14\00:50:12.27
BEING BORN AND I FELT LIKE
EVERY SINGLE THING I HAVE EVER
00:50:12.27\00:50:17.28
STRUGGLED WITH MADE
SINCE WHEN I HELD THIS CHILD.
00:50:17.28\00:50:21.22
SO I THINK THAT IT'S THAT GOD
PROMISED TO CHANGE NOT ONLY MY
00:50:21.22\00:50:25.69
LIFE BUT GENERATIONALLY.
AND SATAN, I THINK IS VERY ANGRY
00:50:25.69\00:50:29.79
ABOUT THAT. BUT
GOD HAS BEEN FAITHFUL.
00:50:29.79\00:50:32.63
AND I AM HOLDING MY DAUGHTER
WHO HAS NOT DONE A DRUG, AND I'M
00:50:32.63\00:50:38.13
HOLDING HER DAUGHTER THAT
WAS BORN BEAUTIFUL AND HEALTHY.
00:50:38.13\00:50:41.54
SO I THINK THE RESTORATION
OF FAMILY IS JUST INCREDIBLE.
00:50:41.54\00:50:46.04
INCREDIBLE. AND THE
FAITHFULNESS OF GOD.
00:50:46.04\00:50:48.51
>> HAVE YOU EVER RESTORED --
I KNOW YOUR DAD IS DEAD, BUT DID
00:50:48.51\00:50:53.21
YOU EVER RESTORE YOUR
RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR MOTHER?
00:50:53.21\00:50:56.35
>> WE TRIED A COUPLE OF TIMES,
BUT -- I WISH I COULD SAY YES TO
00:50:56.35\00:51:01.99
THAT, BUT I GOT ADOPTED WHEN I
WAS 43 BY A WOMAN THAT ASKED ME
00:51:01.99\00:51:06.90
THE SAME QUESTION, AND THEN SHE
SAID CAN I ADOPT YOU, BUT MY MOM
00:51:06.90\00:51:13.67
AND ME -- BECAUSE THERE WAS SO
MUCH DAMAGE, WE TRIED TO, BUT IT
00:51:13.67\00:51:18.34
HAS NEVER WORKED. IF
ANYBODY HAS A PRYER LIST,
00:51:18.34\00:51:21.54
JUST PUT ME ON
THERE, SO I WOULD SAY NO.
00:51:21.54\00:51:24.41
AND MY -- MY, I WAS ABLE TO
FORGIVE HER AND LET IT GO, AND I
00:51:24.41\00:51:30.25
WAS ABLE TO -- THE PAIN OF THAT,
BE ABLE TO GIVE THAT TO GOD, BUT
00:51:30.25\00:51:34.42
LIKE I SAID WHEN MY
MOTHER-IN-LAW MOVED IN, AND ALL
00:51:34.42\00:51:39.13
OF THAT REJECTION STUFF, AND ALL
OF THOSE WOUNDS, I ALLOWED, I
00:51:39.13\00:51:44.33
THINK, THE DEVIL TO
OPEN THOSE WIDE OPEN.
00:51:44.33\00:51:47.37
>> AND THAT IS MY POINT.
IT IS ABOUT GIVING IT TO GOD.
00:51:47.37\00:51:53.31
IF YOU ARE ONLY FOCUSING -- I
KNOW BY THE TIME I GOT HALFWAY
00:51:53.31\00:51:57.28
THROUGH THAT, I HAD TO TEAR
IT UP, BECAUSE IT WAS TAKING ME
00:51:57.28\00:52:01.45
BACK TO A PLACE THAT GOD HAD
ALREADY HEALED, AND I JUST -- IT
00:52:01.45\00:52:06.49
WAS AT A TIME IN MY LIFE THAT
I WASN'T AS CLOSE TO GOD AS I
00:52:06.49\00:52:10.49
NEEDED TO BE, I THINK. SO
IT IS SOMETHING -- WHAT IS
00:52:10.49\00:52:13.73
THAT SCRIPTURE, ISAIAH -- IS
43:18 OR -- YOU TALK HERE FOR A
00:52:13.73\00:52:20.80
MINUTE, DON'T
LEAVE ANY DEAD AIR SPACE.
00:52:20.80\00:52:23.17
>> WELL, THERE ARE TIMES YOU
HAVE TO -- LOOK AT THAT -- WHEN
00:52:23.17\00:52:28.81
IT SAYS CONFESS YOUR SINS ONE
TO ANOTHER SO YOU MAY BE HEALED.
00:52:28.81\00:52:33.88
I THINK THERE IS BENEFIT
IN TALKING WITH EACH OTHER.
00:52:33.88\00:52:39.09
BUT I THINK WE HAVE AN ENEMY
THAT SAYS I CAN ALSO USE IT.
00:52:39.09\00:52:44.69
>> YEAH, AND THIS IS THE
SCRIPTURE THAT COMES TO MY MIND.
00:52:44.69\00:52:48.26
WHEN YOU ARE TIRED, WHEN YOU
HAVE THINGS PILED UPON AND PILED
00:52:48.26\00:52:52.93
UPON, IT IS SO EASY
TO GET INTO A PITY PARTY.
00:52:52.93\00:52:56.27
AND LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING,
SELF PITY IS STRAIGHT FROM THE
00:52:56.27\00:53:01.64
PITS OF HELL. >> FEAR IS TOO.
00:53:01.64\00:53:03.78
>> FEAR IS AS WELL. BUT
WHEN YOU GET INTO THAT SELF
00:53:03.78\00:53:09.15
PITY, THAT'S STRAIGHT
FROM THE PITS OF HELL.
00:53:09.15\00:53:11.35
IF YOU HAVE GOT TO GIVE IT OVER
TO GOD, BUT WHAT HE BROUGHT TO
00:53:11.35\00:53:15.16
ME WAS ISAIAH 43:18-19, HE
SAID DO NOT REMEMBER THE FORMER
00:53:15.16\00:53:22.80
THINGS NOR CONSIDER THE THINGS
OF OLD, BEHOLD, I WILL DO A NEW
00:53:22.80\00:53:30.11
THING. NOW IT
SHALL SPRING FORTH SHALL
00:53:30.11\00:53:33.78
YOU NOT KNOW IT, I WILL EVEN
MAKE A ROAD IN THE WILDERNESS,
00:53:33.78\00:53:39.21
AND RIVERS IN THE DESERT.
THE BEASTS ARE HONOR ME, AND THE
00:53:39.21\00:53:49.02
OSTRICHES, BECAUSE I GIVE DRINK
TO MY PEOPLE, MY CHOSEN, AND THE
00:53:49.02\00:53:53.19
PEOPLE I HAVE FORMED FOR MYSELF,
THEY SHALL DECLARE MY PRAISE.
00:53:53.19\00:53:58.50
AND I THINK SOMETIMES -- SEE,
WE FORGET TH GREATNESS OF GOD.
00:53:58.50\00:54:03.17
IT'S -- IT'S LIKE -- WE'RE LIKE
THE ONES WHO ARE WANDERING IN
00:54:03.17\00:54:07.64
THE WILDERNESS, SAYING, OH,
WHY DID YOU BRING US OUT HERE TO
00:54:07.64\00:54:12.91
DIE? YOU KNOW?
00:54:12.91\00:54:14.58
AND, YOU KNOW, THE LORD TOLD
THEM IN NUMBERS 14, I BELIEVE.
00:54:14.58\00:54:18.99
HE KEPT TELLING --
HE GAVE THEM MANNA.
00:54:18.99\00:54:21.76
HE OPENED THE RED SEA
FOR THEM. HE GAVE THEM MANNA.
00:54:21.76\00:54:25.26
HE GAVE THEM
WATER FROM THE ROCK.
00:54:25.26\00:54:27.60
HE KEPT MEETING THEIR NEEDS, AND
THEY KEPT SAYING TO MOSES, YOU
00:54:27.60\00:54:32.70
BROUGHT US OUT HERE TO DIE.
AND GOD FINALLY SAYS TO THEM,
00:54:32.70\00:54:36.94
HEY, IF YOU THINK
THAT'S WHAT IT IS, FINE.
00:54:36.94\00:54:42.18
IT WILL BECOME A
SELF FULFILLING PROPHECY.
00:54:42.18\00:54:45.58
>> THERE WAS A CLIP I SAW ON
FACEBOOK ONE TIME, AND IT HAD
00:54:45.58\00:54:49.28
A -- YOU KNOW
THAT WHACK-'EM GAME.
00:54:49.28\00:54:53.82
>> WHACK-A-MOLE. >>
YEAH, WHERE YOU HIT THE
00:54:53.82\00:54:57.06
THINGS THAT COME UP. AND
THE WOMAN SAID THERE WAS A
00:54:57.06\00:54:59.89
LITTLE BOY IN LINE, AND HE IS
4 YEARS OLD, AND HE SAYS I DON'T
00:54:59.89\00:55:04.03
WANT TO STAND IN
LINE. I WANT TO GO AND PLAY.
00:55:04.03\00:55:07.40
NO, NO, YOU ARE
GOING TO HAVE FUN.
00:55:07.40\00:55:09.50
I DON'T WAT TO HIT THOSE THINGS.
00:55:09.50\00:55:11.41
YOU JUST HIT ONE AND IT
POPS UP AND WHAT IS THE POINT?
00:55:11.41\00:55:14.54
AND EVERYBODY IS
LAUGHING AT THIS KID.
00:55:14.54\00:55:18.41
AND SO AT ONE POINT THE
MOTHER IS JUST LIKE -- SHHH.
00:55:18.41\00:55:24.25
AND PEOPLE STARTED LAUGHING AND
TALKING, AND THE KID RN AROUND
00:55:24.25\00:55:29.09
EVERYBODY AND PULLED THE TABLE
CLOTH OFF OF THE GAME, AND THERE
00:55:29.09\00:55:33.70
WERE TWO ADULTS UNDER THE
GAME PUTTING THESE PUPPETS UP.
00:55:33.70\00:55:38.97
AND HE SAID SEE,
THIS IS RIDICULOUS.
00:55:38.97\00:55:41.64
AND EVERYBODY LAUGHED.
BUT I THINK THAT SATAN IS LIKE
00:55:41.64\00:55:48.51
THOSE PUPPETS. THAT
HE'LL POP THINGS UP, AND
00:55:48.51\00:55:51.65
GOD SAYS DON'T PLAY.
GET OFF OF THE GRID, BECAUSE
00:55:51.65\00:55:55.65
WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT IS
BEING ABLE TO SAY, I BELIEVE
00:55:55.65\00:55:59.65
THAT GOD CAN RESTORE -- >> AMEN.
00:55:59.65\00:56:02.39
>> -- BRING WATER TO THE
WILDERNESS, CAN LITERALLY MAKE
00:56:02.39\00:56:06.49
NEW, AND I HAVE TO BE ABLE
TO -- IF GOD WANTS ME TO LOOK AT
00:56:06.49\00:56:12.70
SOMETHING, I WILL LOOK AT IT,
BUT IF THE DEVIL DOES IT -- HE
00:56:12.70\00:56:17.84
NEVER HAS A
GOOD REASON TO DO IT.
00:56:17.84\00:56:19.91
IT'S TO TRIP YOU UP.
>> BUT WHEN WE FORGET THE
00:56:19.91\00:56:23.41
GOODNESS AND GREATNESS OF GOD, I
WANT TO READ NUMBER 14:27, THEY
00:56:23.41\00:56:29.02
ARE JUST CONSTANTLY COMPLAINING,
GOD DOES ONE MIRACLE AFTER
00:56:29.02\00:56:34.02
ANOTHER MIRACLE, AND THEY
ARE CONSTANTLY COMPLAINING.
00:56:34.02\00:56:38.63
OH, WOE IS US. AND
THEN FINALLY THE LORD SAYS,
00:56:38.63\00:56:43.50
NUMBERS 14:27. HOW
LONG SHALL I BEAR WITH THIS
00:56:43.50\00:56:48.47
EVIL CON GRI GAGS
WHO COMPLAINS AGAINST ME.
00:56:48.47\00:56:51.77
I HAVE HEARD THE COMPLAINTS,
SAY TO THEM -- HE IS TELLING MOW
00:56:51.77\00:56:57.85
CUSS, AS I LIVE SAYS THE LORD,
JUST AS YOU HAVE SPOKEN IN MY
00:56:57.85\00:57:03.55
HEARING, SO I WILL DO TO YOU.
SO I THINK THERE COMES A TIME
00:57:03.55\00:57:07.82
WHEN WE FORGET
THE GREATNESS OF GOD.
00:57:07.82\00:57:11.23
IT'S ALMOST LIKE GOD SAYS IF YOU
KEEP SPEAKING THIS NEGATIVE, IT
00:57:11.23\00:57:15.56
WILL BECOME A
SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
00:57:15.56\00:57:20.17
BECAUSE WE PUT A CHAIN ON HIS
WRISTS, AND HE CAN'T WORK IN OUR
00:57:20.17\00:57:24.27
HEARTS ANYMORE. DO YOU AGREE?
00:57:24.27\00:57:27.88
SAY YES OR NO. >> OKAY.
00:57:27.88\00:57:29.98
WE'LL COME BACK TO
THAT. >> ALL RIGHT.
00:57:29.98\00:57:33.75
>> WE WANT TO INVITE YOU TO
STAY TUNED FOR THE SECOND HOUR.
00:57:33.75\00:57:39.29
WE'RE GOING TO BE TALKING
MORE ABOUT THE CHANGING FACES OF
00:57:39.29\00:57:47.76
ADDICTION. STAY TUNED.
00:57:47.76\00:57:48.50
¤
00:57:48.50\00:57:51.03