>> I want ¤ >> I
00:00:06.74\00:00:50.88
>> want to ¤ ¤
00:00:50.88\00:01:08.93
>> Hello, friends. Welcome to 3
ABN today. Thursday night live
all the way live. Nothing
00:01:08.93\00:01:13.23
pre tape that this is welcome to
you. Thank you for taking the
time to join us. And we're
00:01:13.23\00:01:17.77
talking about relationships. I'm
so glad to have my bride with me
because he's going to
00:01:17.77\00:01:22.61
be good program for both of us.
Yes, I'm excited about this
program. When we talk
00:01:22.61\00:01:25.88
about relationships. Love
marriage family knew the full
topic. That's right. And we
00:01:25.88\00:01:32.42
have an exciting couple here.
That's going to be that affect.
Their new here will
00:01:32.42\00:01:37.29
hold them until late in case. We
But they haven't amazing story.
They've put that in the
00:01:37.29\00:01:41.40
book and then talk about the way
the Cod found a way into their
lives and what that
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meant. You know, the journey
that we're going to talk about
tonight in their lives is
00:01:47.10\00:01:50.14
synonymous to many of you than
watching. And this somebody
around you that's planning on
00:01:50.14\00:01:54.94
getting married or just got
married unmarried, you know that
you can always glean
00:01:54.94\00:01:59.11
something from a program like
this. Not so take the time. I
would say hit the record
00:01:59.11\00:02:03.12
button. But nowadays, I don't
know if that mode and hit record
00:02:03.12\00:02:07.89
on a digital television. You can
do that. But you don't want to
miss this program now and invite
00:02:07.89\00:02:11.39
other people in your home say
hate chill out. Let's watch a
programs. Find out about
00:02:11.39\00:02:15.83
relationships at no point in
relationship and a marriage. Is
there a time where we can
00:02:15.83\00:02:21.57
learn something? No, always.
We've been married 39 years.
Don't tell anybody. And which
00:02:21.57\00:02:27.61
still learning. And that's right
about each other's all we have.
That's right. We are.
00:02:27.61\00:02:32.01
and just a moment we'll
introduce you to our. Guests
tonight. Yes, they're citing.
00:02:32.01\00:02:38.49
Yeah. What young couple. What's
exciting about them is is latest
from Brooklyn. She's
00:02:38.49\00:02:41.46
part Jamaican. That's the part I
love on has a consistent and
they have an amazing I'm just
00:02:41.46\00:02:50.83
so excited about that. But
before we do any of that, we
want to thank you for your
00:02:50.83\00:02:53.50
prayers and your financial
support of 3ABN in ministry
would not be what it is
00:02:53.50\00:02:58.74
without your support and your
donations. Yes. And even if you
take the time to come here
00:02:58.74\00:03:04.18
volunteer also makes a
difference. And I'm one of the
thing I want to point out.
00:03:04.18\00:03:08.55
Yeah. Beginning October 14th
right here on 3 A B and it's
going to be 09:00PM. Central
00:03:08.55\00:03:14.12
Time is going to be 07:00PM
Pacific Time on beginning a 2
week evangelistic series
00:03:14.12\00:03:22.16
entitled It's coming. But the
graphic, the second out of the
program, but you'll be able to
00:03:22.16\00:03:25.00
find out more about it on the
3ABN website. It's going to be a
15 part series. You'll be
00:03:25.00\00:03:30.14
able to download the
evangelistic lessons and follow
along from your home
00:03:30.14\00:03:35.78
from church. Whether you're by
yourself with some and we'll
have some beautifully colored
00:03:35.78\00:03:38.78
lessons you can fill in the
blanks. And we have some
outlines to go with that also.
00:03:38.78\00:03:43.45
So look forward to that October
14 to 29 you ports very on kids
00:03:43.45\00:03:50.76
in the Pleasant Hill, 7th Day
Adventist Church in Northern
California. Yeah. So put it on
00:03:50.76\00:03:53.56
your calendar to join us. And if
you haven't planned evangelism
yet, this is a time no money for
00:03:53.56\00:03:58.23
your church. It's all set. Just
tune in and you'll be blessed by
it. In men what we have
00:03:58.23\00:04:01.84
tonight for music. Honey. >>
We're going to start with music
00:04:01.84\00:04:06.98
and should be with music. relate
their secret weapon. Okay. Haha.
We're going to have Stephanie
00:04:06.98\00:04:16.02
Dawn sing a wonderful
song entitled Come To Me.
00:04:16.02\00:04:31.67
>> To >> to >> know.
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¤ ¤ ¤
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¤ >> To >> I
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>> will kill ¤ >> know,
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¤ ¤ ¤
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>> To >> I will kill ¤
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¤ ¤ >> you find. He
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>> you'll >> It's ¤
00:06:57.75\00:07:13.33
>> the >> you >> know.
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¤ ¤ ¤
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>> o ¤ >> To
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>> needy. >> I will kill ¤
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¤ ¤ ¤
00:07:56.97\00:08:11.99
>> To >> be. ¤
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>> I will kill ¤ ¤
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¤ >> To need. ¤
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¤ >> Thank you so much,
Stephanie, for that wonderful
00:08:42.82\00:08:48.96
song. Come to me and I will give
you rest wonderful minister of
00:08:48.96\00:08:55.63
music. Yeah, and thank you so
much for that thing. groundwork
for how you can find a blessing
00:08:55.63\00:08:59.30
and rest in your relationship.
Therefore, let's introduce this
00:08:59.30\00:09:03.47
wonderful couple. Brandon,
Brandon and >> she made to read
that right. Brandon shredded
00:09:03.47\00:09:10.21
Taylor, good to have you here
thank We spotted your name. We
will get you know, when I saw
00:09:10.21\00:09:17.05
you tonight as a while with a
cheerful looking couple than we
think now we met them
00:09:17.05\00:09:22.36
before ago in Pennsylvania.
yeah, used to live. That's all
tell us about your journey.
00:09:22.36\00:09:30.90
Sure. Well, really begin beings.
So we met actually at >> We were
00:09:30.90\00:09:36.30
just acquaintances for like 2
years each other and pass. And
you say hello and then it was
00:09:36.30\00:09:42.58
his seniors last semester school
that we enrolled in the same
class that allowed us to just
00:09:42.58\00:09:50.65
start to have conversation a
little bit more. But we both
ended up dropping the class. So
00:09:50.65\00:09:55.09
it became too much work. And we
both decided it was going to
needed to make that decision
00:09:55.09\00:09:59.16
together by all. But
individually, we had dropped the
class and the next time we
00:09:59.16\00:10:01.13
saw each other. That's when we
found out and we just continue
to talk a little bit more and
00:10:01.13\00:10:06.90
I think you can share a little
bit more of your story, but
there's some things he was
00:10:06.90\00:10:10.14
going through and he started tax
me questions about it from a
faith perspective. And I
00:10:10.14\00:10:14.48
just started to share what I
believe from the Bible. And that
grew into a friendship
00:10:14.48\00:10:18.08
and shortly after that,
expressed interest in taking me
on a date. And then would
00:10:18.08\00:10:26.22
you say haha, I first said I
needed to pray about it because
at that point in my
00:10:26.22\00:10:33.26
journey, I said that the next
person that I dated Earth spend
time with. I wanted to
00:10:33.26\00:10:36.46
be my husband. Well, I told him
if if we were going to go out, I
needed to be sure that
00:10:36.46\00:10:42.20
it was actually going to be
meaningful and that was the
right thing to do. And I we
00:10:42.20\00:10:45.84
need to pray about it. So but
here we 7 years married to
children. but he was not at a
00:10:45.84\00:10:55.28
new ad. Venice. We wrecked and
he was not was not. >> finding a
00:10:55.28\00:10:59.45
Christian, every different
faith, right? And that was that
was it like when you when you
00:10:59.45\00:11:04.56
met shredded? >> Sure. Well,
most impressive thing for me was
that I've been on a very long
00:11:04.56\00:11:07.60
journey of trying to figure out
who I was. And you know what? I
value in life and people that
00:11:07.60\00:11:12.63
was spending time with it just
is really felt like I was in the
00:11:12.63\00:11:14.77
confused. >> Place in my life.
at that time at the time of
searching this interesting Hogan
00:11:14.77\00:11:23.08
somehow led us to have more
intentional conversations and
just really understood. Like
00:11:23.08\00:11:26.68
I've seen you around, you know,
campus before. But who are you?
And then what do you
00:11:26.68\00:11:31.12
enjoy? And so we just started
having these deep conversations
00:11:31.12\00:11:33.99
and it just felt like our
conversation could go on and on
and just felt like, you know,
00:11:33.99\00:11:37.69
time which is passing by, you
and we weren't even keeping
track of time. And I remember
00:11:37.69\00:11:43.57
talking to her and just being in
amazement that. There was
somebody who was a young person
00:11:43.57\00:11:48.94
at that time who actually
believe in the Bible said it was
seeking to live out what the
00:11:48.94\00:11:54.74
Bible said. Yeah, I would ask a
question just about purity and
about her values and about her
00:11:54.74\00:11:57.88
lifestyle. And it was amazing to
me that she actually lived out
what she professed to
00:11:57.88\00:12:02.65
believe in. So for my life
right, seeing many people who
call themselves Christians,
00:12:02.65\00:12:08.46
right? one of those to call
myself a Christian, but I was
out doing every type of thing.
00:12:08.46\00:12:11.26
You know, and the College Night
life environment. But actually
00:12:11.26\00:12:15.63
encounter somebody who actually
believe who actually lend out
what they said. They believe
00:12:15.63\00:12:20.04
with incredible to me. And
that's really what stuck with me
after the very beginning. What
00:12:20.04\00:12:22.94
do you believe that when she and
begin to share her faith with me
in at least Yeah, is
00:12:22.94\00:12:30.18
so nice. And she had values,
you know? >> That's nice. Many
00:12:30.18\00:12:34.45
looking for women like that.
Women to have values Christian
values, not just valujet. now.
00:12:34.45\00:12:40.49
It's all on the due date. So we
dated for what, 2 years before
we actually. So year before
00:12:40.49\00:12:51.27
you propose to you, it is so 2
years before we got married and
for for 7 years. So about
00:12:51.27\00:12:55.94
9 years into the have children.
>> Yes, we have a 4 year-old
00:12:55.94\00:12:59.84
son in Steven in a 10 month-old
daughter named Simone. And if
00:12:59.84\00:13:05.08
I'm not incorrect, you waited to
with you a merry to do what? >>
Head? Yeah. You So.
00:13:05.08\00:13:13.52
>> It's something that was
really important for us. And we
started we called our
00:13:13.52\00:13:17.59
courtship was maintaining
boundaries that will help us
honor help us protect the
00:13:17.59\00:13:22.63
things that we were saying for
marriage. And one of them being.
00:13:22.63\00:13:24.70
>> Sex. And so when we started
our relationship, we discussed
boundaries. But we left
00:13:24.70\00:13:31.41
kissing on the table because we
didn't feel like that would be a
big deal for us and a
00:13:31.41\00:13:35.24
couple months into the
relationship. You know, one
thing they don't really talk
00:13:35.24\00:13:39.41
about as much as when you have a
spiritual connection. When
you're together, the physical
00:13:39.41\00:13:42.55
attraction grows even more. And
we found that to happen between
us and the kids and
00:13:42.55\00:13:48.32
started to get a little bit too
intense to the point where just
like they were turned
00:13:48.32\00:13:53.80
away into not going to make it
if we're going at at this rate
like that. And we were both
00:13:53.80\00:14:00.07
individually uncomfortable. We
never quite brought it up. But
this is how God worked I ended
00:14:00.07\00:14:06.44
up going abroad for a few months
to study in Europe and that was
00:14:06.44\00:14:10.38
going to give us physical
distance for some time while I
was gonna started to feel
00:14:10.38\00:14:15.22
impress like, you know, maybe we
shouldn't pull back in and stop
kissing outside. But I do not
00:14:15.22\00:14:20.39
want to be in want to tell him
that we should do that. So I
prayed. I said, Lord, if you
00:14:20.39\00:14:25.59
want to stop doing this, you
have to tell him and he has to
be the one to bring it up. That
00:14:25.59\00:14:29.53
same week. Brandon brought up a
complication to He came and he
said, you know, I feel really
00:14:29.53\00:14:37.71
impressed that I want to honor
you more. And I want to honor
God more in our relationship
00:14:37.71\00:14:41.84
in. I think we stop and I that's
what I shared with him. That I
had been feeling the
00:14:41.84\00:14:47.18
same way. And so hundreds of
miles apart as when we made that
decision to save our next
00:14:47.18\00:14:52.12
kiss for our wedding day. >> for
you in cage at the time, we were
00:14:52.12\00:14:57.09
not just like, oh, this Yeah. >>
So we don't know when that was
going to be. But we just
00:14:57.09\00:15:02.10
knew that that's where the Lord
was leading us. And so, yeah,
the next time we saw
00:15:02.10\00:15:09.64
each other and in person, right?
We could sense the difference
00:15:09.64\00:15:13.31
between us. It was like we can
really see each other is like
years here. That's got talent I
00:15:13.31\00:15:21.05
need on a u N. The U.S. such
throughout remainder of this
00:15:21.05\00:15:28.06
relationship so >> Wow, we save
in the face and it a 600 areas
was announcing the number,
00:15:28.06\00:15:42.34
right? That's beautiful. We're
going to dive into more the
details of your life. But I just
00:15:42.34\00:15:45.17
want to. >> You are reading
about that a little bit. How
00:15:45.17\00:15:49.01
beautiful that is. 4 in the
standings for young people to
come to the realization that
00:15:49.01\00:15:52.21
yes, we are children of cotton
how beautiful it is. I love the
way you say that now use a
00:15:52.21\00:15:58.25
completely different
illustration, but kind of along
the same lines. That's
00:15:58.25\00:16:01.16
why Christmas is only once a
year. You know, you can get
gifts all year long with
00:16:01.16\00:16:06.03
differences, Chris, going to be
and for those of you that are
seeking to have up your
00:16:06.03\00:16:09.23
relationship in preparation for
marriage, that's what caught
intended to do that to
00:16:09.23\00:16:14.60
preserve each other for each
other and look at the blessing.
00:16:14.60\00:16:18.34
Now you have 2 wonderful
children and 7 years cots.
Perfect number. And God is
00:16:18.34\00:16:25.38
moving in a beautiful, beautiful
direction. So he inside we just
dove into that part of the
00:16:25.38\00:16:27.65
story. kind. I would come back a
little bit and maybe find out
something about it. How to God
00:16:27.65\00:16:35.09
take you through this because I
want to go back to a little bit
what you said when you met on
00:16:35.09\00:16:38.29
different pages. Faith lies.
That's right. And how that
transition happen for you?
00:16:38.29\00:16:43.77
Well, for me when I was born and
raised in Christian home,
parents who love my sister and
00:16:43.77\00:16:49.10
I took care of us and provided a
wonderful foundation for us. >>
But like many youth and
00:16:49.10\00:16:53.74
young people, I got caught up in
this longing to belong Journey
00:16:53.74\00:17:01.12
where I was just seeking belong
to my peers and belong to those
around me. And it's really
00:17:01.12\00:17:04.69
develop friendships. And I was
struggling a lot in that area. I
constantly felt ostracizing,
00:17:04.69\00:17:08.09
just very different. And just
didn't fit in. And so as
somebody who was felt that
00:17:08.09\00:17:12.36
hurt as a as a young child would
do a lot of her people do hurt
00:17:12.36\00:17:18.57
people hurt other people in time
when developed this very that,
you know, track record of
00:17:18.57\00:17:22.67
different relationships for
hours in relationships and being
intentionally hurting other
00:17:22.67\00:17:27.38
people. And to the point had a
very negative view of myself
leading up into college and
00:17:27.38\00:17:31.68
into those, you know, college
years and went on a journey is
trying to find out what God is
00:17:31.68\00:17:36.92
our for my life who he wanted me
to be as a person as a man when
it came to relations that
00:17:36.92\00:17:41.22
has completely lost. And I
remember hitting rock bottom
moment saying Lord, I don't
00:17:41.22\00:17:47.60
know which way is up. I need you
to please just show me your plan
for the show me your
00:17:47.60\00:17:52.13
path and around that same time
as one, you know, shot and I
have the very first
00:17:52.13\00:17:58.14
conversation ever begin to
exchange a get to know one
another and just how got moved
00:17:58.14\00:18:01.61
through her at that time to
speak. Words of encouragement to
me to speak words like
00:18:01.61\00:18:07.12
actually my my plan is possible.
If you surrender to me, if you
00:18:07.12\00:18:09.95
study my word, if you want to
stand, you know, the calling
that I have on your life, it is
00:18:09.95\00:18:14.26
possible to live as a Christian
today. That whereas every
assurance right on time got.
00:18:14.26\00:18:19.16
>> And I could see that he was
we started having those
conversations. I could see
00:18:19.16\00:18:23.77
that he was truly seeking It was
amazing to me because he would
ask me a question on
00:18:23.77\00:18:29.64
point him to scripture study and
of course, and I was
intentionally praying for him
00:18:29.64\00:18:34.91
because I saw that you're
running. And as he would, you
know, some read something or
00:18:34.91\00:18:40.32
study something or come to
understand something. He
immediately wanted to put it
00:18:40.32\00:18:43.89
into practice. And you have are
kind of witness to, you know,
friends or family. We
00:18:43.89\00:18:48.82
kind of like a tug of war. You
know, you share something and
they may seem receptive and
00:18:48.82\00:18:55.40
you don't know where really it's
going to go. But he immediately
00:18:55.40\00:18:59.20
everything he was learning from
the Bible. He was like, I want
to do it. I want to follow God
00:18:59.20\00:19:02.94
just seeing that you're in and
was but really impactful for me
as well because it it made me
00:19:02.94\00:19:07.61
show my plate. How are you
really like believing what you
say? Believe in, you know,
00:19:07.61\00:19:13.82
consciously seeking to obey the
voice and follow him every day.
00:19:13.82\00:19:18.52
Wow. >> Before we dive for that,
want to remind our viewing and
listening audience that we're
00:19:18.52\00:19:22.99
going to be taking questions.
Yes, and I are in the second
hour and some of you might
00:19:22.99\00:19:26.09
have relationship questions. And
if you want to send those by
e-mail, send them to live
00:19:26.09\00:19:30.80
at 3ABN OTT TV. That's L I V E
at TV or if you want to tax
those, you can send them to
00:19:30.80\00:19:39.81
618-228-3975, once again, that
6, 1, 8, 2 to 8, 39. 75. And
we'll answer those in the
00:19:39.81\00:19:46.75
second hour. let me turn to
you. >> Yes, OK, have a question
00:19:46.75\00:19:51.32
for both of you. Slice the
topic. really loving
relationship so relevant for
00:19:51.32\00:19:56.36
today, too. >> We look around
in our society and we see that
00:19:56.36\00:20:03.60
there's a lot of images,
information ships in of love
being promoted. You know, when
00:20:03.60\00:20:08.24
we look on online or, you know,
at our TV channels and that's
what I think so I think
00:20:08.24\00:20:12.04
there's a lot of ways that the
world is promoting for us to
look at relationships and look
00:20:12.04\00:20:15.38
at dating and to look at 11, we,
you know, with turn on the news
every other day. Now we
00:20:15.38\00:20:19.98
see someone some new star couple
is being divorced or, you know,
having a major break
00:20:19.98\00:20:24.02
up. And I think that, you know,
people are seeing this take
00:20:24.02\00:20:27.62
place and they're wondering, you
know, what is the pathway to to
real lasting love? Actually look
00:20:27.62\00:20:32.53
like how do we actually
established a a love of the
foundation for a relationship
00:20:32.53\00:20:37.50
that is going to last. And I
think that's really why, you
know this topic of love and
00:20:37.50\00:20:42.74
topic of relationships so
important today. If we look at
the divorce rate across the
00:20:42.74\00:20:44.64
country for a look at the
marriage rate that the rate of
qualification are constantly
00:20:44.64\00:20:50.15
increasing day by day. And so I
think that this topic of
relationships and love just a
00:20:50.15\00:20:55.18
crucial topic for us to address,
especially with so many young
00:20:55.18\00:20:57.15
people, people of all ages
really wondering this guy really
care about relationships and his
00:20:57.15\00:21:02.16
his plan. Does this plan really
work for >> anything to share
00:21:02.16\00:21:08.26
>> Yeah, I think everyone wants
to love and be loved and it's
one of to things that we
00:21:08.26\00:21:13.07
all experience and life is. Will
I ever find someone to share my
life with them? A lot
00:21:13.07\00:21:17.44
of people take different paths
on had made choices before you
know, got places together. But
00:21:17.44\00:21:25.18
if it's something that everybody
can connect to and like Brandon
00:21:25.18\00:21:29.85
said, we're seeing it
everywhere. But we need to be
able to sift through the noise
00:21:29.85\00:21:32.72
and really see what got us to
this about it. That's right. >>
And in what moved you to
00:21:32.72\00:21:38.09
take it to a point of the
ministry. Lot of people have
experiences, but when the Lord
00:21:38.09\00:21:42.36
moves on you to take it from
just an experience. 2 ministry,
00:21:42.36\00:21:46.94
how did that come about? We've
been learning a >> When have
been learning so much during our
00:21:46.94\00:21:58.48
courtship back in 2013 and and
to 2014. And so we started
looking online cause court. It
00:21:58.48\00:22:03.22
was a very new area for both of
us. We have never she never been
a courtship before I'd ever
00:22:03.22\00:22:05.75
been. And I never heard the word
before. And so we were just at a
00:22:05.75\00:22:10.66
phase where we're learning as we
went and our relationship, it
was in their early 2014 time
00:22:10.66\00:22:16.63
period where we felt like we
should begin to share more about
what we're learning. Nowak
00:22:16.63\00:22:20.74
sternly with other son. We
looked online to see who's
talking about questions on
00:22:20.74\00:22:26.54
YouTube on Google. So we get
end, find anything really. No
one was really talking about it
00:22:26.54\00:22:30.21
as they were going through it.
And so we felt like I impressing
us at that point in
00:22:30.21\00:22:34.42
time to begin making a series of
videos online on YouTube. We
started out with this was
00:22:34.42\00:22:38.92
turned the courtship series and
we didn't know who was going to
00:22:38.92\00:22:43.86
go beyond that. It going to be
the thinking. Oh, this is the
opportune time for us to talk
00:22:43.86\00:22:46.33
about boundaries. Talk about
purpose. Talk about
intentionality that
00:22:46.33\00:22:51.50
relationship. Talk about
disagreements. How to manage
conflict in your relationship.
00:22:51.50\00:22:55.07
And so we're just documenting
those different lessons. As guy
was teaching us. it grew into a
00:22:55.07\00:23:00.68
wonderful years Long Ministry on
you talking about courtship,
engagement into marriage. And
00:23:00.68\00:23:03.95
then that's where the Hound
Levitt, homeless birth. >> After
00:23:03.95\00:23:08.45
so many years of sharing videos
speaking in, getting a lot of
questions from people out of
00:23:08.45\00:23:15.66
e-mails. We we really wanted to
personally touch certain
different couples and be able to
00:23:15.66\00:23:18.99
really help with what God was
showing us because I personally
like our experience wasn't
00:23:18.99\00:23:25.43
difficult. We had so much fun.
We had joined. We wanted other
people to experience that
00:23:25.43\00:23:28.74
well. So we started love at home
to be able to do that to reach
00:23:28.74\00:23:35.94
more couples more directly and
work with them out coaching. And
that's how it all began.
00:23:35.94\00:23:41.25
>> It's called love at home left
home. How many of us which you
00:23:41.25\00:23:47.42
haven't YouTube subscribers a
new home. Also arts or YouTube
channel. the title worth the
00:23:47.42\00:23:52.49
wait? God, OK, minutes with
purpose. And that has about
20,000 in last 20,000 ago.
00:23:52.49\00:24:02.14
>> little one you know, the
thank you worth the wait that's
good. And we we we made
00:24:02.14\00:24:07.18
reference to the book. But now
this talk a little bit about
your book and just do to Yes,
00:24:07.18\00:24:15.75
yes. So 31 day devotional
through the love stories of the
Bible. pretty much for
00:24:15.75\00:24:21.06
every day you are focused on a
different couple in the Bible.
>> The way this came about was
00:24:21.06\00:24:25.76
really just the way that we are.
So for everything that we shared
on a channel and if we
00:24:25.76\00:24:31.23
every day like speaking
engagements, we always sought to
look for, OK, where can we
00:24:31.23\00:24:35.04
find this principle in the
Bible? How can you show people?
This is in the Bible?
00:24:35.04\00:24:39.27
is there a couple whose story
exemplifies this principle that
00:24:39.27\00:24:43.75
we can teach in so whether it
was David and Michael teaching
about protecting the sacred
00:24:43.75\00:24:47.58
circle around your marriage and
that sort of thing. We start to
look for couples. And then one
00:24:47.58\00:24:50.95
day we're just like my wind
there. >> Can we find like? It's
00:24:50.95\00:24:56.02
a certain amount of couples in
the Bible where we can do a
devotional where everyday you
00:24:56.02\00:24:59.06
read about a different couple
have has anyone ever done
something like that in? We
00:24:59.06\00:25:02.93
started researching, we started
just writing in literally, you
00:25:02.93\00:25:08.07
know, it took a couple years,
but that's why staff we came up
with 31 couples and we called it
00:25:08.07\00:25:12.84
tokens of Love because for each
couple, what's the token? What's
the lesson that you can
00:25:12.84\00:25:16.41
take away from the story that
you can see to apply your life
even if you're single the way
00:25:16.41\00:25:21.15
we structure the devotional. So
that, you know, you read the
story and then there's a
00:25:21.15\00:25:27.16
journal in Prague for you to
think about how it personally
applies to you and your
00:25:27.16\00:25:29.16
relationship with God. And then
if you are in a relationship and
00:25:29.16\00:25:33.19
you want to read it with your
significant other, there's a
couple of corners, which is
00:25:33.19\00:25:38.07
something we really like to do
in our relationship where we sit
back talk about K, you know how
00:25:38.07\00:25:42.10
how is our marriage this week?
What can we do better? Where
could we Was, you know, the
00:25:42.10\00:25:45.34
best part was the part that
could you know me better and you
put it in the book is a
00:25:45.34\00:25:50.98
couple of corners. So you can
reflect on the story and the
topic and then discuss the
00:25:50.98\00:25:54.05
question with each other. >> Not
that couple. love that. We have
a devotional book, but
00:25:54.05\00:26:00.79
your book pulls pick couples
from the Bible. So what name
some couples? So we have.
00:26:00.79\00:26:10.03
>> Adam Eve, of And so all the
ones we know Jacob power back of
the have you or and that we
00:26:10.03\00:26:17.34
the Acela I since the fire
really like and we since I know
you might want to like,
00:26:17.34\00:26:24.45
especially the couple's where
you might only have 2 to 3
verses about the couple. What
00:26:24.45\00:26:29.42
can you what can you take away
from what the scripture I have
no, you don't have just a bill
00:26:29.42\00:26:33.86
and they have. Do you haha? >>
We did the good stories and then
00:26:33.86\00:26:42.13
not so pretty. >> like that. I
like that because the Bible is a
real book. I've told people so
00:26:42.13\00:26:45.43
often in a 35 years of pastoral
ministry have told people you
00:26:45.43\00:26:51.67
need to watch a movie, read the
live in the Attic. in a close
you have told people if you want
00:26:51.67\00:26:58.48
to see life as a really happens,
how it has happened. The Bible
is a good place to go. And then
00:26:58.48\00:27:03.62
allows the theater of the mind
to come into play to see that. I
mean, just go back to and I
00:27:03.62\00:27:10.79
said, make up and a nice yeah.
Exactly. Like of Jacob and
Rachel the question we always
00:27:10.79\00:27:18.50
ask. >> How did not know on
Apple was and I know not know
00:27:18.50\00:27:28.41
what she did in soundproof Gauze
for the rest of the way. My
would you not know those
00:27:28.41\00:27:34.42
interesting stories and you have
them in the book to right 30
00:27:34.42\00:27:40.49
different couples. >> What can
be does expect from tokens of
love. I think that they can
00:27:40.49\00:27:47.36
expect a journey through the
Bible from Genesis all the way
to revelation that will
00:27:47.36\00:27:52.30
encourage them. That will
challenge them to study the word
of to try to you know, we also
00:27:52.30\00:27:58.01
incorporated go deeper
scripture. So this is this far
too much, you know, context for
00:27:58.01\00:28:02.41
us to cover just in a brief
devotional. So we do the south,
some of the scriptures for folks
00:28:02.41\00:28:05.48
for folks to be able to dive
into into study out themselves
to this so much there, you know,
00:28:05.48\00:28:09.32
in the scriptures that we
just compare line upon line and
00:28:09.32\00:28:12.32
precept precept. >> We can just
see beautiful things that got is
no inspiring. And given to us in
00:28:12.32\00:28:16.42
his word for us to learn from.
So that that journey through the
love stories in the Bible
00:28:16.42\00:28:20.73
and just encouraging them to
constantly put God first and
they're left 5 to conflicts,
00:28:20.73\00:28:24.27
surrender to him and stick to
has worsened. They can apply to
00:28:24.27\00:28:30.97
the lines. >> And it ends with
the ultimate relationships, rice
and his bride. because we can
00:28:30.97\00:28:36.85
read these stories and of
course, is a personal
application to us here on
00:28:36.85\00:28:38.68
Earth. But the most important is
understanding God's love for us
as his his bride so
00:28:38.68\00:28:45.69
yeah, hopefully as as people
study they can see God cares
about loving relationships, of
00:28:45.69\00:28:51.19
course, personally individually.
But also as a home in the way
00:28:51.19\00:28:54.30
that he wants to save us. >> You
know, before the problem, sure
00:28:54.30\00:29:00.64
is that I want watch out for you
because you might some questions
right now. But scientific, okay.
00:29:00.64\00:29:08.08
Be married 7 years. Can you
recall your first conflict and
how you how are you with that
00:29:08.08\00:29:12.55
conflict in Yes, >> Now, you
okay. If you talk about youth
00:29:12.55\00:29:21.22
about how do how do you deal
with conflict? >> You know, we
get along pretty well. So when
00:29:21.22\00:29:28.53
we do have conflict, it's
usually something pretty pretty
major where there's a breakdown
00:29:28.53\00:29:33.94
in communication that's probably
like, are they use? We're
something happens is we have a
00:29:33.94\00:29:38.44
breakdown in our communication,
even within fully share
00:29:38.44\00:29:42.28
something with their
expectations there that we
didn't communicate what we
00:29:42.28\00:29:48.28
typically like to do is and
we'll be up hours. I know it's
bad, but if we have a
00:29:48.28\00:29:52.35
disagreement, we're up and we're
talking until we feel like we've
reached a point of it being
00:29:52.35\00:29:57.29
resolved. And the way we do that
is we talk about what the issue
is and he explains his side. I
00:29:57.29\00:30:02.63
explain my side the thing we
need to clear up, we use a lot
of active listening. So OK, when
00:30:02.63\00:30:05.87
I heard you say all right, you
know, this is what I believe.
You're you're saying and we
00:30:05.87\00:30:11.57
use a lot of that. And we we
start talking about solutions,
OK? So what can we do to try
00:30:11.57\00:30:18.95
to just all it's going? Yeah.
What's what's going to work with
can helping we talk to
00:30:18.95\00:30:23.65
those and it could be 02:00AM.
Haha. The interesting thing is
that for the first 6 months of
00:30:23.65\00:30:28.16
are there We actually did not.
>> Read more any type of
disagreement whatsoever into
00:30:28.16\00:30:33.56
one of our friends at the time.
And after this. And you all have
or are you would have
00:30:33.56\00:30:37.60
a need know can give it. Give
it time. >> Haha. And so, of
00:30:37.60\00:30:43.57
course, and the weeks to come
from there, it was maybe
something with the channel
00:30:43.57\00:30:46.78
something like that just became
a source of a disagreement. like
you said, sure. And a lot of it
00:30:46.78\00:30:50.78
oftentimes comes down to poor
communication, except I where
where she said something and I
00:30:50.78\00:30:56.62
may be interpreted it one way
and then got my mind just ran
with that. The rain with that
00:30:56.62\00:31:02.59
story and that became what she
was trying to say to me rather
than me digging a little bit
00:31:02.59\00:31:07.20
deeper in saying this is what I
heard and then giving her the
opportunity to say,
00:31:07.20\00:31:10.17
actually, that's not what I
meant to say that allowing her
to refine it. Yeah.
00:31:10.17\00:31:14.04
>> Conflict is mostly around
working together to do some
things. I think now that's
00:31:14.04\00:31:22.08
parenting. And yes, you do this
that I do that, that that's
probably right active
00:31:22.08\00:31:26.45
listening talking about. Yeah, I
about that. And oh, I mean, even
be in a relationship
00:31:26.45\00:31:30.99
coach since 1989. >> You
mentioned something that's true
00:31:30.99\00:31:36.36
about those 2 and a calm, but we
stay up and talk. >> Yes, we we
00:31:36.36\00:31:40.96
would like case and know it's
not really enough. Okay. Repeat
that Hear you say, that's a wise
00:31:40.96\00:31:49.64
and warned you will boys
important to you. And so these
are things and I'm glad you
00:31:49.64\00:31:51.87
pointed out because sometimes
couples just want avoid. talk
about avoidance and you know,
00:31:51.87\00:31:58.85
some people high and avoid and
slow on on on And so those who
along confrontation high and
00:31:58.85\00:32:06.52
avoidance. >> I want to talk
about it. And it's like putting
00:32:06.52\00:32:10.49
dirt under a rug. before, you
know, you're tripping over that.
You realize all right. It was
00:32:10.49\00:32:16.93
just I was just dust for months
ago, but I just could put stuff
and are there now to So
00:32:16.93\00:32:21.50
we talk about everything. Yeah,
we like you said to 2 in the
morning. If you have to.
00:32:21.50\00:32:28.24
Yeah. >> Those are
where you now yeah.
00:32:28.24\00:32:33.75
>> Yeah. But no. We have to talk
and think just personality wise.
00:32:33.75\00:32:38.69
We truly want to seek to resolve
it because we know that there's
not much that comes between
00:32:38.69\00:32:43.43
us. So if something has come
up, we should really probably a
00:32:43.43\00:32:47.00
>> And even though we we teach
this stuff, we oftentimes
struggled tell people about
00:32:47.00\00:32:51.83
him that the cycles of avoidance
feeding into, you know, partner
00:32:51.83\00:32:56.87
dominance and how when you're
scared of a new that feeds into
self-confidence. And so we
00:32:56.87\00:32:59.77
talk about that. But even in our
own relationship, we still have
00:32:59.77\00:33:03.95
to learn how to be assertive.
Yeah, how to ask for what you
want and how to, you know, avoid
00:33:03.95\00:33:06.55
slipping things underground,
too. >> That's right. I'm not
teaching that the couple for
00:33:06.55\00:33:10.22
many, many years. And that's
true. I'm here in the words and
phrases that I use part of
00:33:10.22\00:33:16.29
the dominance of yeah, you know,
kind asked what you want. Yeah,
00:33:16.29\00:33:20.96
right. what I would often say
about that, but about asking for
what you want. Look, you don't
00:33:20.96\00:33:27.00
what you Yeah, I'll be shocked
if you can ask snow may ask for
what you want and then say it.
00:33:27.00\00:33:33.21
even when we want to go out
to eat, you know, >> things like
00:33:33.21\00:33:36.24
that you decide use. We don't do
that. So let's go to tidy
tonight. log date night as what
00:33:36.24\00:33:43.39
you'll discover in question
period. >> Is that one always
the first to the other than to
00:33:43.39\00:33:49.99
is not necessary, right? That's
right. It's like we want to go.
What do you want to know?
00:33:49.99\00:33:52.89
What's moved by? What do you
like to do? And I told the young
couple wants that as I
00:33:52.89\00:33:55.83
was counting the the mayor just
that, OK, stop, stop, stop. He
asked you where you
00:33:55.83\00:34:00.47
want to go. You ask him was he
young lady all 7 years from now.
You're going to figure
00:34:00.47\00:34:06.31
out Youve America 7 years and
had not one of the request
fulfilled mission. Keep
00:34:06.31\00:34:10.31
different back to him. Yes,
that's good. I like that. You
you talk about those types of
00:34:10.31\00:34:13.95
things. >> Yeah, that's an
interesting concept because
00:34:13.95\00:34:19.22
there is a component of serving
one another and a marriage where
I'm seeking to serve him and
00:34:19.22\00:34:22.99
what is it that you need and how
can I help? You know, with your
day or make your life
00:34:22.99\00:34:28.16
better? But you have to balance
that with your individuality in
00:34:28.16\00:34:32.47
your personal needs as well. You
have to be able to still
communicate like, well, no, I I
00:34:32.47\00:34:37.07
I'm serving you, but I still
have a desire to go to X, Y and
Z for like you said our date
00:34:37.07\00:34:41.71
night. And so there's a delicate
balance between the 2 that you
have to and knowing
00:34:41.71\00:34:47.95
when to exercise that
assertiveness and when to draw
back and let it be a moment of
00:34:47.95\00:34:52.35
service service definitely
takes, you know, the Holy spirit
guiding you and and
00:34:52.35\00:34:56.93
instructing you in that way.
Because even though you're too
>> individuals, even though
00:34:56.93\00:35:02.60
you're married and one of the
Lord. Yeah, 2 different, very
00:35:02.60\00:35:10.51
haha. >> Which Bible couple
resonated with you? The most in
the union motion that you
00:35:10.51\00:35:14.84
>> with the into this and you go
for OK, so I might be a shocker.
00:35:14.84\00:35:23.08
my couple that resonated with
me. The most as we're writing
the book and studying
00:35:23.08\00:35:26.39
>> Was actually Jose and Gomer.
>> So so Jose in Gomer, story
00:35:26.39\00:35:31.73
of the of the Prophet who >> you
know is I'm instructed by the
00:35:31.73\00:35:37.20
Lord to marry this woman who's
been very, you know, actually
active another, you know, in
00:35:37.20\00:35:40.60
with other. Yeah, there are
other other individuals. And so
the end of having their family
00:35:40.60\00:35:46.14
and, you know, establishing
themselves and then she runs off
with another man is and what is
00:35:46.14\00:35:51.28
the lower tell tell Jose to do
that to going to seek out her?
Right. And so I think even
00:35:51.28\00:35:57.05
though that it is a very hard
situation to even imagine for
someone to go through today. I
00:35:57.05\00:36:01.72
think that just the message
behind that of God likening that
relationship to the way
00:36:01.72\00:36:06.59
that he seeks after assess his
wayward children, children who
have run U.S. train gone, you
00:36:06.59\00:36:11.27
know, w****** ourselves and you
do the Friday of different You
know, outside of the
00:36:11.27\00:36:15.34
country outside of the
boundaries of the Lord has given
us. He's constantly
00:36:15.34\00:36:19.47
seeking after us him pursuing
us. He's being intentional and
just desiring us and letting
00:36:19.47\00:36:22.64
us know that I want you. You are
mine. And I think that that is
that have resonated
00:36:22.64\00:36:28.42
with me so much because my
entire story of concept pursuing
may be running this
00:36:28.42\00:36:33.52
direction, that the right But
the honestly being persistent
and sending Brandon, I'm right
00:36:33.52\00:36:37.69
here. Come to Beautiful mind was
unable in ABA County. >> And
that one is actually
00:36:37.69\00:36:45.97
title love and lovable. I'm so
naval. His name meant means a
fool his character proved to
00:36:45.97\00:36:54.38
be the same. He lived up to his
name and he maybe he did
something that really upset.
00:36:54.38\00:36:58.41
David, to the point when David,
like I'm gonna come and kill you
and everyone in your
00:36:58.41\00:37:02.28
household Abigail on herring
that this was David's intention,
00:37:02.28\00:37:08.29
you know, got herself together
and she tried to go meet him
along the way and basically
00:37:08.29\00:37:12.63
intercede. Right. And she said
upon me, let you know the folly
let the iniquity of my husband
00:37:12.63\00:37:20.60
fall on just to know that she
knew she was married to. She
knows character. I'm pretty sure
00:37:20.60\00:37:24.51
this was not the first instance
of >> some type of foolish
00:37:24.51\00:37:28.01
decision, but she instead of
saying going to David and BMI,
00:37:28.01\00:37:34.25
that was him. >> Spare me by the
he's crazy. You know what like
that? She said no. Let let it be
00:37:34.25\00:37:39.49
on me. I'm so sorry for this
decision he made and I'm sorry
for. >> You know how this is
00:37:39.49\00:37:43.59
going to be. And she put it on
herself. And that really showed
me. Are you loving even
00:37:43.59\00:37:48.26
when the person is not being
really level even when you know
something might be going
00:37:48.26\00:37:54.57
on. That could really personally
affect unity, play. Are you
still finding the away
00:37:54.57\00:38:01.01
to Sullivan the way God loves us
because that's essentially what
Jesus did for us. He and
00:38:01.01\00:38:04.08
Jesse did. I'm on that. That
penalty that was meant for us.
He he stepped in and so that
00:38:04.08\00:38:08.78
was my favorite couple just to
see a wife being willing to
honor her husband who? Quite
00:38:08.78\00:38:15.66
frankly wasn't probably
deserving of that. And she still
did Pat. And, you know,
00:38:15.66\00:38:17.63
he still ended up passing from
the shock of the news What had
occurred. But just to see her
00:38:17.63\00:38:26.60
honor him in that moment that
really stood out to me beautiful
00:38:26.60\00:38:32.77
and they are many couples in
their model. And think the whole
situation with Hoffman Phineas
00:38:32.77\00:38:36.91
and and the death of. When they
died. The large Eli and I think
from his wife, lost her child.
00:38:36.91\00:38:49.42
Yes, you know, it combines the
glory of the Lord has departed
some some amazing stories in the
00:38:49.42\00:38:56.26
Bible. that's really good for
him. And Sarah, how are they in
your book? Oh, There was
00:38:56.26\00:39:00.27
some couples we had to choose,
OK, which direction or which
also and there are many I
00:39:00.27\00:39:04.24
would a brand like. >> I don't
know what he's like. Pick the
00:39:04.24\00:39:09.28
one that's you know, really
meaningful. Like where you get
the real tokens. So, yeah, there
00:39:09.28\00:39:13.78
were definitely some couples.
Are they so many angles and
Abraham and Sarah was one of
00:39:13.78\00:39:17.15
those. Oh, yeah, I forgot they
and, you >> Sergei Surrogate,
00:39:17.15\00:39:24.99
mom. So many single him lying
about her has seen his wife like
this. So ways we could have
00:39:24.99\00:39:29.80
taken that stories they're in
there. >> And you know that the
00:39:29.80\00:39:34.00
greatest 7 is always hear about
the fact that the Bible was not
00:39:34.00\00:39:36.30
written by men as shows all
their weaknesses. Men wrote the
Bible. They wouldn't really talk
00:39:36.30\00:39:42.74
about all the junk. All We have
a talk by his good side. Shows
us that in our frailty he can
00:39:42.74\00:39:49.58
still use us. That's a beautiful
message about about marriage
what else is on the
00:39:49.58\00:39:55.59
hot honey? just enjoying this.
>> just will not back was in
Goma. That was one of my
00:39:55.59\00:40:02.43
Fitzsimmons called. >> In
remembering how got always
brings us back. You
00:40:02.43\00:40:05.00
want to overtake your lovers?
That's right. talk about that.
But hit the 3 children. You
00:40:05.00\00:40:09.47
noticed their names. Oh, yes,
anonymous to the progression of
the relationship. Just real
00:40:09.47\00:40:13.78
men got SOS and the mean no
mercy in this house and law. You
mean that not my toast. It
00:40:13.78\00:40:24.02
went from. >> Not a bad Haha.
All of a sudden it got really
00:40:24.02\00:40:30.16
bad. You know, you know,
no mercy in this house and got
00:40:30.16\00:40:34.00
ready to shoes. >> Insensitive
and intentional to got to the
point where low low, I mean that
00:40:34.00\00:40:38.40
not my child. And then she left.
>> Could you imagine being named
00:40:38.40\00:40:44.97
after your parents issues in
their marriage and know that?
That's, you know, I'm thinking
00:40:44.97\00:40:51.85
>> You can clearly see how the
trauma was affecting everyone in
the household. the names.
00:40:51.85\00:40:56.99
Yeah. A lot go to the next
question. I just remind our
viewing audience yes about the
00:40:56.99\00:41:01.19
fact that you can send your
questions in. Yeah, it's so
wonderful to see God blessing
00:41:01.19\00:41:03.96
a couple up. >> rewinding a
videotape to remains a If we
00:41:03.96\00:41:13.94
win, that's solid. I mean, we
took a while to grow up. We you
only needed. Haha. going. I knew
00:41:13.94\00:41:26.41
from you may want to have some
questions. While we get
together. We can answer those
00:41:26.41\00:41:31.45
questions in a way that I
believe God will be out of. The
blast will bless you
00:41:31.45\00:41:34.86
through the answer is want to
send them by email. Send them to
live at TV. That's L I V E.
00:41:34.86\00:41:40.73
>> At 3 ABN DOT TV or if you
want to test those 618-228-3975.
00:41:40.73\00:41:50.01
If you're driving 618-228-3975.
Do not drive and text. We have.
>> Appreciate Okay. Have
00:41:50.01\00:41:59.45
another question. What should
Christians do when Dowd in God's
interest? So his plan
00:41:59.45\00:42:04.62
for the for their love >> this
was probably the foundation of
00:42:04.62\00:42:14.36
how I started this journey of
understanding that God cares
about who I'm my I was reading
00:42:14.36\00:42:21.27
the story of Adam in need. And
that's the first time that I
really start to see guys, the
00:42:21.27\00:42:26.88
match where, you know, Adam was
created and he had, you know he
had gone through name and the
00:42:26.88\00:42:35.22
animals and realize that he
didn't have somebody just like
him and God put him to sleep and
00:42:35.22\00:42:40.36
he creates the for him and he
wakes up and he sees he has a he
has a mate. And then when I
00:42:40.36\00:42:47.76
was looking at the story, I was
like God created every person on
this earth. He knows
00:42:47.76\00:42:53.27
me better than I know myself.
And so what I want to trust the
one who knows me. To to
00:42:53.27\00:43:00.91
match me with someone because he
will know the person that I
should be with even better
00:43:00.91\00:43:03.75
than I could. And that was the
moment where I really started to
believe a God. You are able
00:43:03.75\00:43:08.95
to do this and you care because
if you care that deeply from the
00:43:08.95\00:43:13.12
very beginning of creation to do
this for Adam and Eve. You can
do it for me. So to anyone who
00:43:13.12\00:43:18.76
is feeling discouraged anyone
who probably doesn't, no, if God
cares about their love life or
00:43:18.76\00:43:23.60
anything like that, that's what
I would say is God is the
ultimate matchmaker. He's
00:43:23.60\00:43:27.27
better than any of these
websites ease. But it, you know.
00:43:27.27\00:43:31.47
>> meeting you to another like
he's really the best and being
surrendered to that.
00:43:31.47\00:43:35.91
Interesting that as your
foundation is is so essential to
that journey, knowing that
00:43:35.91\00:43:42.08
he's willing to do that for you,
I think is is is crucial to
trusting in the process
00:43:42.08\00:43:48.46
right now. said Web he pulled
8. >> Through different right.
00:43:48.46\00:43:57.77
But do you think of that? >>
I think we've we've encountered
00:43:57.77\00:44:02.20
many couples in our lives so far
who have sought to find love and
the variety of ways that are
00:44:02.20\00:44:06.54
available nowadays. And I think
that I'm the most important
00:44:06.54\00:44:12.35
thing I think is that the
principles of Ghana, the
principles of the Bible still
00:44:12.35\00:44:14.98
apply regardless of what you're
doing on this, I think and you
can certainly find love online.
00:44:14.98\00:44:19.72
You can find someone who across
the cut across the country of
some of you may have never even
00:44:19.72\00:44:23.19
met before, but they may be
someone who lines in terms of
your belief in terms of what
00:44:23.19\00:44:28.23
you value in terms of how you
live your life in care of
yourself. And that could be a
00:44:28.23\00:44:31.10
wonderful, happy marriage. And
we know several of them that
have we have taken place in
00:44:31.10\00:44:34.57
and that one another through
online. I yeah, I think that it
says most important, I
00:44:34.57\00:44:39.37
think is that these principles
here are couple regardless of
how you meet somebody in the
00:44:39.37\00:44:43.58
store online. You know, the
church and so on so forth. >>
Yeah, I think a while ago
00:44:43.58\00:44:49.65
it probably consider it a little
tab. Moved to to go on a website
00:44:49.65\00:44:54.06
and need someone. But I think
now with technology and
realizing how you we can can I'm
00:44:54.06\00:44:58.99
sure people watching this right
now are in different countries
realizing how technology has
00:44:58.99\00:45:02.60
connected us so much it's not
Ted Lieu anymore to consider
meeting someone online. So it's
00:45:02.60\00:45:11.77
I think as long as when you're
meeting your go into that
process, you still, of course,
00:45:11.77\00:45:16.61
include the Lord all allow the
Holy Spirit to guide your
decisions that that that's
00:45:16.61\00:45:19.48
what's most important. Yes. >>
Well, that that's so true
because we live in the
00:45:19.48\00:45:24.59
technology that you can avoid.
You can say, well, leave
technology out of my
00:45:24.59\00:45:29.22
relationship. That's not going
to happen is too late go back in
97 by area of our lives.
00:45:29.22\00:45:35.76
Even to the point where we think
along the lines of maybe what we
00:45:35.76\00:45:40.84
just saw on the Internet, all we
just heard on television, what
article we just ran shapes.
00:45:40.84\00:45:47.44
Everything about us. IPads,
iPhones with the doesn't really
matter what the platform
00:45:47.44\00:45:51.45
technology is intrusive in our
brains. are not designed to
assimilate all that information.
00:45:51.45\00:45:57.49
So some somebody maybe been
DJing on something that they're
watching on the Internet. Was
00:45:57.49\00:45:59.49
it to YouTube or whatever the
plateau, maybe and then all of a
sudden it away from
00:45:59.49\00:46:04.83
conversation that you might say
to husband. Now we talk about
that. What you hear
00:46:04.83\00:46:12.30
about on the Internet maybe
that's the kind of where we're
in. So glad you said that
00:46:12.30\00:46:15.54
because this generation coming I
a for young people to even on
the Bible. It's challenge.
00:46:15.54\00:46:21.14
Yeah. Yeah. That's why I'm glad
you want husband question at
00:46:21.14\00:46:32.12
>> in your transitions. >> You
know, viruses, husbands love
your wives. How does that
00:46:32.12\00:46:39.49
translate to you? Because you're
not just a husband, but you're a
00:46:39.49\00:46:43.70
dad now want take children into
the picture because you have the
balancing of the of the family.
00:46:43.70\00:46:47.70
Yeah. The ministry, you have the
differences of opinion. If the
conflict behind we raise the
00:46:47.70\00:46:52.14
as a husband. What seems to be?
Put one hot spot young strength
and the area that you
00:46:52.14\00:47:00.72
feel you can be stronger Sure.
That's a great as a wonderful
question. And actually so
00:47:00.72\00:47:04.89
thankful to the scripture, my
Bible with open too. >> First,
00:47:04.89\00:47:11.46
Chapter that tells us, you know,
if God so loved us that we ought
to also love one another. And we
00:47:11.46\00:47:14.86
know that God's love is a
sacrificial love. And I think
that when I think of husbands
00:47:14.86\00:47:21.04
love your wives, I interpret
that receive that as an
instruction for me to be
00:47:21.04\00:47:25.81
self-sacrificing in my marriage.
When I when we first got
married, I think that we have to
00:47:25.81\00:47:30.85
go through. I have to go through
a time where I was learning how
to love my wife. I was learning
00:47:30.85\00:47:36.12
what it actually meant to die to
myself. That marriage is really
not about me. America
00:47:36.12\00:47:38.89
is actually a bow. How can I
best serve my wife? How can I
best put a smile on her face?
00:47:38.89\00:47:44.76
How make her laugh today? What
can I learn about her today?
00:47:44.76\00:47:48.56
That will help our relationship
continue to grow and continue to
be a healthy, you know, got
00:47:48.56\00:47:52.87
romance. So for me, that's
that's really where my mind
began to go. As we get into
00:47:52.87\00:47:56.40
those first early years of
marriage even today, I think I'm
still learning how because we
00:47:56.40\00:48:03.95
are. I think, definitely are.
And so, you know, as we continue
to mature to adapt to the
00:48:03.95\00:48:07.18
different phases and stages of
our marriage, you know, early
on, we were in that honeymoon.
00:48:07.18\00:48:12.39
And, you know, first, you know,
phase. And then now we have
children's like our
00:48:12.39\00:48:16.66
personalities begin to
developing our characters begin
to mature and I think
00:48:16.66\00:48:18.56
that that's where I'm going. I'm
growing and how to love through
the stages of our of
00:48:18.56\00:48:26.13
our relationship. And I think
that I'm strong in knowing who
she read, it isn't and what
00:48:26.13\00:48:30.14
she values and what's important
to her. she continues to grow
00:48:30.14\00:48:33.44
into mature into the beautiful
life, that she is a mother that
she is. That's what I'm looking
00:48:33.44\00:48:36.34
to grow. Continue to improve. >>
And I'll tell you what, I can't.
I can't really tell
00:48:36.34\00:48:41.22
that that's a growth area for
him because he's really doing
it. So whatever he's if if you
00:48:41.22\00:48:47.66
are wrestling, I don't see that
the cause. The Lord is doing no
00:48:47.66\00:48:53.40
work. We've definitely
encountered a lot of situations,
especially for me health
00:48:53.40\00:48:56.10
challenges where my life was on
the line and in different
moments of our marriage, are
00:48:56.10\00:49:02.30
really saw him sacrifice. And I
really saw him put into action.
The vow and the commitment that
00:49:02.30\00:49:07.68
he made to me when we got
married. So that's that's an
encouragement to And that's
00:49:07.68\00:49:18.12
beautiful. that's really nice
because when you think about the
00:49:18.12\00:49:20.92
challenges. >> Truly. And as you
said, still learning you have to
39 years. We are still learning
00:49:20.92\00:49:26.76
to because we are people who are
not stagnant, not train for all
00:49:26.76\00:49:33.60
he would grow. We could all this
life because the come at you
from different stages of life,
00:49:33.60\00:49:37.91
the world around you, you know,
it's going to rain. It's going
to be sunny they're going to be
00:49:37.91\00:49:43.24
cold days and warm days as you
may have even read the books, 4
Seasons of Marriage, which
00:49:43.24\00:49:49.78
is right. Everybody still go
into a season. And even if
you're in the winter, what's
00:49:49.78\00:49:55.02
coming next? break. So just hold
on to that. that's the next
question. We have the
00:49:55.02\00:49:59.33
money. >> How can
singles prepare themselves for a
00:49:59.33\00:50:04.33
healthy, happy marriage? >> Oh,
that's a wonderful You know,
there's a variety of
00:50:04.33\00:50:09.07
that's that could be a whole
workshop itself. I to give just
one tip, though, on on
00:50:09.07\00:50:13.74
that on that question would have
to be the importance of surround
00:50:13.74\00:50:19.58
yourself with like-minded
people. also striving to, you
know, Tartan don't pass up on
00:50:19.58\00:50:24.39
the romance. So people who are
looking to honor God and their
relationship, people who are
00:50:24.39\00:50:28.79
going to encourage you and pray
for you and you can be
vulnerable with them. You
00:50:28.79\00:50:32.89
could share with them hears from
struggling in his right knee
prayer. His encourage
00:50:32.89\00:50:35.23
Mundt and those people are going
to be willing to be in your
corner and also people
00:50:35.23\00:50:38.17
know couples who are happily
married like yourselves. 39, 39
years of marriage. You can
00:50:38.17\00:50:44.17
come around those those singles
and and that sort of give them a
00:50:44.17\00:50:49.61
glimpse into the way that God is
moving in your marriage the way
the working in through your in
00:50:49.61\00:50:54.58
your throughout the decade that
saw together and that that is
really giving hope to a
00:50:54.58\00:50:57.65
singles to know that the
surrendering to guy taking a day
after day certain to get
00:50:57.65\00:51:02.72
year after year. This is the got
has a plan that he desires for
you to follow in terms of
00:51:02.72\00:51:07.66
your relationships and you can
actually experience healthy.
Happy Holly romance. That's
00:51:07.66\00:51:10.00
what I would say. >> And I would
I think self-awareness is huge.
00:51:10.00\00:51:18.31
Do you know yourself? Do you
have you addressed any trauma in
your life? I know for me, you
00:51:18.31\00:51:23.51
know, I grew up in a single
parent household. My parents
were divorced and so
00:51:23.51\00:51:27.78
understanding how that affected
me. If I could understanding,
you know what contributed to the
00:51:27.78\00:51:32.65
voice of the breakdown of my
family can help me moving
forward with, you know, the next
00:51:32.65\00:51:37.89
generation. And I think we don't
realize like we will bring
baggage. We bring things
00:51:37.89\00:51:43.83
with us to merit. So as much as
well, if you're single, you're
preparing your design.
00:51:43.83\00:51:48.60
Marriage, do the work of being
aware of who you are and what it
is that you would be
00:51:48.60\00:51:55.21
bringing in 2 and a marriage
what type of home would be
established with someone like
00:51:55.21\00:51:59.11
you a lot of times there's focus
on the person that I won or, you
know, does this person
00:51:59.11\00:52:06.12
how what you're looking for? But
it's like you have to be that as
well. And you have to
00:52:06.12\00:52:08.76
be aware of who you are. So
that's what I was is do the work
00:52:08.76\00:52:17.53
of self-awareness. imagine going
to a high sense of self with
very So where to whether living
00:52:17.53\00:52:21.57
in combining your life with
someone else than ever we're
talking with single sometimes
00:52:21.57\00:52:25.61
always have long list of what
they're looking for. Another
person. And we always tell them
00:52:25.61\00:52:30.71
be who you are looking for,
focus on being who you're
looking for, that that's most
00:52:30.71\00:52:34.28
important. The individual
journey that your charging, you
know, >> I'm glad you brought
00:52:34.28\00:52:38.59
that up because sometimes as
head of couples, who do you want
to be the best version of
00:52:38.59\00:52:42.72
yourself, which you wouldn't
really know what that is. >> She
decides to hike. Paul
00:52:42.72\00:52:48.16
says examine yourself tested,
prove yourself and this very
good. We talked about that
00:52:48.16\00:52:53.84
trailer. >> You know, we had the
trail and talk about that and
00:52:53.84\00:52:56.87
stuff in your life depending on
how long you've been around. You
have a lot of stuff in your
00:52:56.87\00:53:01.14
trailer, right? But it is
number. He's a vocal trailer
00:53:01.14\00:53:04.88
trash. >> And people didn't
understand. Okay. But what
you're talking about a set,
00:53:04.88\00:53:07.85
it's the stuff we drag with a
you come from a different
background, choose from or to
00:53:07.85\00:53:13.79
force home. He's from a why. >>
My 35 while you bring that
dynamic in a few merged how we
00:53:13.79\00:53:23.37
you and you got married. >> But
you need if you want to say you
don't have to go out
00:53:23.37\00:53:30.27
sign him. 20 22, OK? Yes, sir,
right free a dog. 22 years. And
one business 24 years and
00:53:30.27\00:53:36.85
another. That's a combined of
how many years? 46 yeah. So you
know, just combined
00:53:36.85\00:53:42.72
Mercedes 20's here, selling cars
and 2 to 22. 24 years selling
00:53:42.72\00:53:46.99
cars and things Mercedes and who
stay He's a sports car. Your
luxury >> When you think about
00:53:46.99\00:54:03.34
combining that much goes into
that the way you think about
money in the way, think about
00:54:03.34\00:54:06.44
family the way you think about a
marriage, whether or not it's
going to work out of my
00:54:06.44\00:54:10.21
mom and dad worked and or how
many? Yes, it brings. I think we
need have one sibling out
00:54:10.21\00:54:17.72
One of >> I want them to case
of I knew baby they even that
00:54:17.72\00:54:25.29
dynamic, your birth order. That
definitely. >> how you approach
00:54:25.29\00:54:29.10
life and decisions as well. That
born. I'm I'm the second
warrant. Yeah. And we're both
00:54:29.10\00:54:35.64
young. Both the youngest. Yeah.
about that is when your
families, you know, he's here
00:54:35.64\00:54:39.97
with the young guys. Yeah. Haha.
>> makes a difference. But up,
what about your role as a
00:54:39.97\00:54:46.68
mother and a wife? Yeah. What's
my weekends and what's U.S.
00:54:46.68\00:54:51.69
>> I would say the week is for
me is not letting. The
responsibilities overwhelming
00:54:51.69\00:54:58.29
to the point that I'm not
pleasant to be around. Exactly.
Good point. There is
00:54:58.29\00:55:02.73
a lot to you know, there's a lot
of people tugging at me and my
husband I'd like you
00:55:02.73\00:55:09.60
said, have a four-year-old. He
has his needs and have a 10
month-old. I'm, you know,
00:55:09.60\00:55:13.98
nursing her. So she's always
looking for me. Yes, and that
can be a lot for one person.
00:55:13.98\00:55:20.42
So yeah to So it's important for
me to be aware of, you know, and
00:55:20.42\00:55:25.69
I'm thankful my husband's
patient with me. But to be aware
of, how am I showing up and
00:55:25.69\00:55:28.69
being because at the end of the
day daily, God reminds me that
all of this. It's all a
00:55:28.69\00:55:35.70
blessing. And yes, it's a lot of
work, but just be present in the
moment enough so that you can be
00:55:35.70\00:55:41.10
So that's probably an area where
I'm I'm trying to, you know,
sometimes the Brooklyn was to
00:55:41.10\00:55:51.88
come when you know exactly what
we area around it. We trying to
00:55:51.88\00:56:07.96
grow. >> But I think where I am
doing good as I understand that
I you know, I stay home
00:56:07.96\00:56:13.20
my children. I'm fully dedicated
to this place where God has the
00:56:13.20\00:56:18.54
right There are many things I
could be doing with my life and
with the gifts talents. He's
00:56:18.54\00:56:21.11
given me. But I've chosen to be
home to be present. And I said
if I'm going to do that and I
00:56:21.11\00:56:26.48
need to make sure it's the best
I can give. So that's right.
00:56:26.48\00:56:31.19
Robin Li. >> My so you can tell
me if I'm and it does help.
patient has been yeah, like a
00:56:31.19\00:56:41.83
much but I think yeah, you exude
pace characters. If a it really
praise the Lord for might be
00:56:41.83\00:56:52.81
good enough for Brooklyn. it's
just what you need is yes. Kind
knew exactly. Is another
00:56:52.81\00:57:02.88
firecracker. >> mom used to say
when one is the final one must
00:57:02.88\00:57:09.56
be the water. You know, the
moment that was that's true. I
know you've been listening to.
00:57:09.56\00:57:14.13
>> Brandon and and we have a lot
more to cover in the second now.
00:57:14.13\00:57:18.10
But I want to remind you once
again, if you know question. >>
Live at 3 ABN dot TVs and
00:57:18.10\00:57:23.94
those questions, sex them in 6,
1, 8, 2, 2, 8. 39. 75. And you
might even in a short
00:57:23.94\00:57:29.81
break, go to look up that book.
Tokens of Love Not Calm and
begin implement what that
00:57:29.81\00:57:35.85
looks like. We'll be back in few
moments here. But so don't go
away. The best is yet to
00:57:35.85\00:57:40.69
come go to your question. Yes,
we all find out more about love
00:57:40.69\00:57:46.16
in the second ¤ ¤
00:57:46.16\00:58:06.11