[MUSIC PLAYING]. [MUSIC
PLAYING] [MUSIC PLAYING].
00:02:10.96\00:05:13.38
>> YOU CAN AGREE THAT
THAT WAS ACTUALLY BEAUTIFUL.
00:05:13.38\00:05:18.35
>> A PRAYER SET TO MUSIC.
>> IN OUR FIRST HOUR WE HAVE
00:05:18.35\00:05:25.35
BEEN TALKING
ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS.
00:05:25.35\00:05:29.22
ABOUT AND THAT A CLIFFHANGER BUT
WHEN JASON ASKED YOU SOMETHING
00:05:29.22\00:05:39.53
AND THEN HE SAYS DID YOU HEAR
ME REPEAT IT BACK TO ME THAT IS
00:05:39.53\00:05:43.27
CALL REFLECTIVE LISTENING.
>> IN THE BOOK THEY CALL THIS
00:05:43.27\00:05:49.74
EMPATHY. >>
EMPATHY IS YOUR LISTENING
00:05:49.74\00:05:55.12
YOUR HEARING WHAT I'M SAYING OR
TAKING THE TIME HEAR ME AND YOU
00:05:55.12\00:06:00.19
WILL REPEAT BACK
TO ME WHAT I SAID.
00:06:00.19\00:06:05.79
>> VALIDATION WE SPEAK ABOUT
AND WHAT VALIDATION IS IS SIMPLY
00:06:05.79\00:06:14.97
SAYING I HEAR YOU, I CARE ABOUT
HOW YOU FEEL, YOU CAN VALIDATE A
00:06:14.97\00:06:22.18
PERSON WITHOUT VALIDATING
WHATEVER THE FOUNDATION IS THAT
00:06:22.18\00:06:25.18
THEY GOT WRONG THINKING BUT
WE STILL NEED TO LISTEN FOR THIS
00:06:25.18\00:06:29.98
BECAUSE I CONFESS THAT MY
PARTNERS THAT -- MY PERSONALITY
00:06:29.98\00:06:34.66
IS A FIXTURE AND ARMOR ONCE WHEN
I WAS TALKING TO A FRIEND FROM
00:06:34.66\00:06:38.23
ENGLAND AND THAT SHE WOULD TELL
ME SOMETHING THAT HER DAUGHTER
00:06:38.23\00:06:40.63
DEAD AND SHE WAS LIKE WHOA IS
ME AND I STARTED SAYING WELL BUT
00:06:40.63\00:06:45.53
MAYBE SHE MET THIS OR THAT AND
I AM TRYING TO HELP HER PAINT A
00:06:45.53\00:06:51.57
ROSY PICTURE AND THIS WAS YEARS
AGO AND SHE SAID YOU DON'T CARE
00:06:51.57\00:06:55.58
ABOUT MY FEELINGS YOU ARE TAKING
GO TO VALIDATE SOMEBODY YOU
00:06:55.58\00:07:04.59
SHOULD BE EMPATHETIC AND
UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FEELINGS
00:07:04.59\00:07:07.42
ARE. >> AND WHEN
THAT HAPPENS WHEN I
00:07:07.42\00:07:11.19
SAY TO RESEAT WHAT I SAID ABOUT
ME THAT IT ALSO GIVES US AN
00:07:11.19\00:07:17.87
OPPORTUNITY TO
CORRECT A MISCOMMUNICATION.
00:07:17.87\00:07:20.17
I MAY BE SO EMOTIONAL THAT I
MISS COMMUNICATE OR I COULD BE
00:07:20.17\00:07:24.14
COMMUNICATING IN SUCH A WAY THAT
REESE HE HEARING SOMETHING THAT
00:07:24.14\00:07:28.21
I NEED TO SAY AND SO WHEN SHE
SAYS IT BACK TO ME I WILL SAY AT
00:07:28.21\00:07:31.38
ONE POINT I DID SAY THAT BUT
THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT I COULD
00:07:31.38\00:07:34.05
SEE HOW YOU TOOK THAT AND I
COULD SEE WHY YOU TOOK IT THAT
00:07:34.05\00:07:36.18
WAY BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT I
MEANT. IT REALLY HELPS TO MAKE.
00:07:36.18\00:07:42.96
>> I WANT TO ASK YOU, THERE
IS PROBABLY SOMETHING HERE THE
00:07:42.96\00:07:51.57
SOUND MORE SOMETHING THAT MIGHT
APPEAR TO A WOMAN BUT HOW LONG
00:07:51.57\00:07:55.17
DID IT TAKE YOU ALL TO GET INTO
THIS PATTERN AND IS IT HAVE YOU
00:07:55.17\00:08:02.24
FOUND THE REWARD OF DOING THIS
THE BENEFIT TO BEING WORTH THE
00:08:02.24\00:08:08.18
EFFORT? >> 32
YEARS >> THAT YOU CLARIFY
00:08:08.18\00:08:16.19
THIS AT FIRST. THIS
IS THE SCHOOL SOMETIME
00:08:16.19\00:08:19.79
SCHOOL LAST A LONG
TIME SOMETIMES YOU ARE A.
00:08:19.79\00:08:27.70
>> THIS DOES BRING
SOME CLARITY TO IT.
00:08:27.70\00:08:32.54
>> THIS IS NOT JUST FOR MARRIAGE
BUT FOR RELATIONSHIPS IN THE
00:08:32.54\00:08:39.41
CHURCH RELATIONSHIP IN THE
FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS THAT WORK.
00:08:39.41\00:08:44.92
WE ALL HAVE SOMETHING THAT GOD
KEEPS LAYING ON YOUR HEART AND
00:08:44.92\00:08:50.93
YOU LOOK AROUND AT OUR WORLD
AND WE HAVE ENTERTAINMENT AND
00:08:50.93\00:08:57.17
COMMUNICATION AND WE INDULGE
WITH PEOPLE AND PEOPLE ARE
00:08:57.17\00:09:02.00
GETTING INTO THE SPACES AND
THE NOBODY EVEN AS IS GIVEN THE
00:09:02.00\00:09:08.58
RIGHT TO HAVE A
DIFFERING OPINION NOW.
00:09:08.58\00:09:12.98
HAVING DIFFERING OPINION DOES
NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE ENEMIES
00:09:12.98\00:09:15.58
WITH SOMEBODY BUT IT
IS BECOMING THAT WAY.
00:09:15.58\00:09:19.79
>> I WAS JUST GOING TO SAY THAT
I THINK IT TAKES LESS TIME TO GO
00:09:19.79\00:09:22.69
THROUGH SOMETHING THAT
YOU DIFFER ON BECAUSE IT
00:09:22.69\00:09:26.19
COMMUNICATED ABOUT IT IT'S DONE
IT'S WRAPPED UP OR AS BEFORE IT
00:09:26.19\00:09:29.46
MAY HAVE LASTED LIKE YOU SAID
THE HOLE DAY BUT FOR THOSE TIMES
00:09:29.46\00:09:34.57
WHERE THEY DON'T LIKE A LOT
OF WORK ANYTHING YOU DO IN LIFE
00:09:34.57\00:09:36.74
THAT IS WORTH HAVING AND
ACCOMPLISHING WORK AND IT'S NOT
00:09:36.74\00:09:40.14
A BAD WORK BUT
IT MAKES IT WORKED.
00:09:40.14\00:09:54.59
>> BUT THE WAY MEN
WORKING WOMEN MARK OR OPPOSITE.
00:09:54.59\00:10:00.70
WAS IMPORTANT TO MEN THERE
AT THE BOTTOM OF THE WOMEN.
00:10:00.70\00:10:04.90
AND VICE VERSA IF YOU CARE ABOUT
ANY RELATIONSHIP MUCH LESS YOUR
00:10:04.90\00:10:14.14
MATE THIS IS SOMETHING THAT YOU
MIGHT LISTEN AND YOU MIGHT TRY
00:10:14.14\00:10:17.25
IT. IF YOU'RE SO THERE'S NOTHING
00:10:17.25\00:10:25.52
WRONG WITH THAT. >>
AND SHELLEY WAS SAYING THIS
00:10:25.52\00:10:27.89
IS NOT JUST FOR MARRIAGE
THE BOOK OF JOB IS A PERFECT
00:10:27.89\00:10:32.83
ILLUSTRATION OF THIS HOLE
PROCESS AND WERE TALKING ABOUT
00:10:32.83\00:10:36.23
EMPATHY AND THAT THE FIRST STEP.
EMPATHY IS WHERE YOUR HEARING
00:10:36.23\00:10:39.80
WITH OTHER PERSON IS SINGING AND
YOUR HEARING IN SUCH A WAY THAT
00:10:39.80\00:10:42.87
YOU'RE SPEAKING INTO IT YOU
WON'T FIND THAT THE BOOK OF JOB.
00:10:42.87\00:10:45.71
WHEN IT COMES TO JOB AND
HIS THREE FRIENDS >> VALIDATION
00:10:45.71\00:10:51.28
POURING OUT HIS HEART AND THEY
DID NOT HEAR WHAT HE SAID AND
00:10:51.28\00:10:56.65
IT'S COMPLETELY
DIFFERENT DIRECTION.
00:10:56.65\00:10:58.15
THEY CAME AT JOB AS IF THEY KNEW
HIS PROBLEM AND THEY KNEW THE
00:10:58.15\00:11:02.12
ISSUE AND THEY WERE TRYING TO
PROVE THAT HE WAS DOING OR HAD A
00:11:02.12\00:11:05.96
RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD AND
THAT WAS A THING AND THAT WAS
00:11:05.96\00:11:09.30
ACCORDING TO WHAT THEY
FELT IN THEIR EVIDENCE WHAT WAS
00:11:09.30\00:11:13.37
HAPPENING TO HIM. >>
YOU MUST BE A SINNER, YOU
00:11:13.37\00:11:15.74
MUST BE A HYPOCRITE YOU MUST
HAVE SOMETHING ALONG WITH THE
00:11:15.74\00:11:18.54
RELATIONSHIP AS THIS WOULD
HAVE TO PURSUE PERSON WHO IS
00:11:18.54\00:11:21.04
RIGHTEOUS. AND JOB SAID BUT NO.
00:11:21.04\00:11:23.41
HE SAID IT OVER AND OVER
AGAIN AND HE NEVER HEARD IT.
00:11:23.41\00:11:27.35
NOT ONE SINGLE TIME DID YOU
HEAR YOU KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS ARE
00:11:27.35\00:11:33.59
WORTHLESS AND MISERABLE
COMFORTERS AND IF YOU JUST BE
00:11:33.59\00:11:39.89
QUIET AND A AND THAT WILL BE
COVERING UP FOR ME YOUR >> THE
00:11:39.89\00:11:44.50
BOOK OF JOB NOW THE REASON I
BRING THIS UP IS BECAUSE WERE
00:11:44.50\00:11:48.57
TALKING ABOUT COMMUNICATION AND
PROCESS AND WOULD START WITH THE
00:11:48.57\00:11:52.37
FIRST ONE AND IT'S POSSIBLE FOR
RELIGIOUS PEOPLE TO NOT BE ABLE
00:11:52.37\00:11:57.11
TO GET PAST THAT FIRST STEP.
WHEN YOU DON'T GET PAST EMPATHY
00:11:57.11\00:12:11.33
YOU WILL HAVE
SERVICE OR RESPECT.
00:12:11.33\00:12:19.70
>> WHAT IS INTERESTING THE BOOK
OF JOB IS THAT JOB JOB LOVED AND
00:12:19.70\00:12:25.51
PRAYED FOR HIS MISERABLE
COMFORTERS ARE WORTHLESS FRIEND
00:12:25.51\00:12:28.98
EVEN NOW THIS IS THE POINT AND
WANT TO MAKE IN OUR WORLD TODAY
00:12:28.98\00:12:33.72
IN SOCIETIES TODAY AND IT
MANAGES TODAY THERE'LL BE TIMES
00:12:33.72\00:12:36.38
WHEN WE WILL NOT BE ABLE TO
GET PAST EMPATHY AND PAST THIS
00:12:36.38\00:12:42.72
REFLECTIVE CONVERSATION WHERE
EMPATHIZING WITH SOMEONE ELSE
00:12:42.72\00:12:44.53
BUT IT DOES IT MEAN TO STOP
LOVING EACH OTHER YOU CAN STILL
00:12:44.53\00:12:47.13
LOVE EACH OTHER AND WE NEED
TO LOVE PEOPLE JOB WAS A CAPTIVE
00:12:47.13\00:12:51.73
POTENTIALLY TO BITTER THOUGHTS
UNTIL HE PLAYED -- PRAYED FOR
00:12:51.73\00:12:53.13
HIS FRIENDS AND EVEN THOUGH HE
COULD NOT COMMUNICATE WITH THEM
00:12:53.13\00:12:56.14
AND WHAT HE HAD TO DO WAS REJECT
WHAT THEY WERE TELLING HIM HE
00:12:56.14\00:13:00.94
WAS HERE THERE PROJECTION OF WHO
HE WAS AND THAT IS SOMETHING WE
00:13:00.94\00:13:07.15
WILL DEAL WITH
UNTIL THE END OF TIME.
00:13:07.15\00:13:09.75
THE HOLE WORLD MATTHEW 24 VERSE
NINE WILL HATE THAT PEOPLE FOR
00:13:09.75\00:13:13.79
HIS NAMESAKE THE NAME OF GOD
WILL BE THE THE CENTERPIECE OF
00:13:13.79\00:13:17.53
THE HATRED AGAINST GOD'S PEOPLE
AND WE WILL HAVE TO REJECT HOW
00:13:17.53\00:13:22.40
WE ARE BEING LABELED BY THE
WORLD AND WE WILL PROJECT THAT
00:13:22.40\00:13:25.23
AT THE SAME TIME WE
WILL LOVE THE WORLD.
00:13:25.23\00:13:27.90
WE WILL LOVE THE WORLD THE WAY
CHRIST LOVED THE WORLD AND JOB
00:13:27.90\00:13:31.57
SHOWED US HOW TO DO THAT.
WE CAN DISAGREE WITH THEIR
00:13:31.57\00:13:35.98
FRIENDS HE DIDN'T ACCEPT THE
LABEL BUT THE SAME TIME WE CAN
00:13:35.98\00:13:41.08
PRAY FOR THAT AND DO THAT ALL
RELATIONSHIPS CAN AND IN LOVE.
00:13:41.08\00:13:49.36
>> I WANT TO COME IN
ON MISERABLE COMFORTERS.
00:13:49.36\00:14:04.34
IF SOMEBODY COMES TO YOU AND
THEIR WANTING TO TALK EMPATHY IS
00:14:04.34\00:14:07.64
TO LISTEN AND UNDERSTAND THEIR
FEELINGS BUT A LOT OF MEN IT'S
00:14:07.64\00:14:16.52
LIKE I CAN'T TALK TO MY HUSBAND
BECAUSE AS SOON AS I BRING
00:14:16.52\00:14:20.32
SOMETHING UP HE SAYS THIS IS
WHAT YOU NEED TO DO AND HE SHUTS
00:14:20.32\00:14:23.63
DOWN AND SET OUT HERE IS WHAT
I DO I HAVE ONE LADY THAT IS
00:14:23.63\00:14:33.47
CHICKEN LITTLE EVERYTHING THAT
HAPPENS THE SKY IS FALLING AND
00:14:33.47\00:14:36.60
THAT HER PERSONALITY AND
THERE IS A TIME WHEN PEOPLE ARE
00:14:36.60\00:14:43.91
HURTING OR WHEN THEY ARE
CONFUSED AND WHAT THEY WANT?
00:14:43.91\00:14:47.65
THEY WANT TO BE HEARD. AND
I HAVE LEARNED TO SAY DO YOU
00:14:47.65\00:14:53.15
WANT MY HELP ON THIS
PROBLEM? AND IT TO WHAT I SAY.
00:14:53.15\00:15:00.16
DO YOU WANT MY
HELP IN THIS PROBLEM?
00:15:00.16\00:15:02.60
AND IF THEY SAY NO JUST FOCUS
ON LISTENING COMFORTER ENOUGH.
00:15:02.60\00:15:08.90
>> LET'S MOVE ONTO MATTHEW
25. MATTHEW 25 JESUS IS TALKING
00:15:08.90\00:15:13.74
ABOUT HIS PEOPLE BUT HE LIKENS
THEM TO VIRGINS AND THERE ARE
00:15:13.74\00:15:19.91
WIVES AND FOOD VIRGINS AND THE
DISTINCTION BETWEEN THEM IS THAT
00:15:19.91\00:15:25.19
THE FOOLISH YOU DON'T HAVE
SOMETHING THAT THAT IS THE OIL.
00:15:25.19\00:15:30.56
THEY DON'T HAVE SOMETHING THEY
NEED AND IF SO WHO TODAY THEY
00:15:30.56\00:15:33.73
INITIALLY TURNED TO TO
PROVIDE WHAT THEY NEED?
00:15:33.73\00:15:41.87
>> IT'S SO EASY FOR US TO TURN
TO EACH OTHER AND HAVE FALSE
00:15:41.87\00:15:45.67
EXPECTATIONS BUT YOUR JOB IS TO
PROVIDE FOR ME EVERYTHING I NEED
00:15:45.67\00:15:49.88
AND THAT IS NOT
WHAT WE SIGNED UP FOR.
00:15:49.88\00:15:52.55
AND NO ONE CAN TRULY PROVIDE
EVERYTHING I NEED BUT JESUS
00:15:52.55\00:15:56.72
CHRIST. AND I IS
-- AND I THINK THAT IS
00:15:56.72\00:16:05.56
THE VERSE AND THE EXPECTATION IS
OF THE YOU'RE THE ONE THAT CAN
00:16:05.56\00:16:10.43
FULLY SATISFY THESE NEEDS THAT
I HAVE I KEEP LOOKING INTO THESE
00:16:10.43\00:16:15.47
OTHER HUMAN BEINGS TO PROVIDE
FOR ME AND I THINK THAT IN OF
00:16:15.47\00:16:19.97
ITSELF WILL BECOME THE DANGEROUS
RELATIONSHIP IN TERMS OF TRUE
00:16:19.97\00:16:28.75
INTIMACY. >> IT'S A
BEAUTIFUL PICTURE HERE
00:16:28.75\00:16:31.52
WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT THE SENSE
OF WHAT'S HAPPENING BUT WHAT WE
00:16:31.52\00:16:35.32
ARE SEEING HERE BECAUSE IT HELPS
US TO PREPARE FOR >> RIGHT NOW
00:16:35.32\00:16:55.78
WE CAN LOOK AT THIS
AND SAY I KNOW WHAT?
00:16:55.78\00:17:00.75
MY PRESENT CRISIS WHAT EVER
IT IS REMINDING ME THAT I CANNOT
00:17:00.75\00:17:04.95
TRUST IN THE GOVERNMENT AND I
CANNOT TRUST IN MY COMMUNITY AND
00:17:04.95\00:17:08.59
I CANNOT TRUST IN MY CHURCH OF
MY CHURCH LEADERS AND I CANNOT
00:17:08.59\00:17:12.19
TRUST IN MY WIFE OR MY HUSBAND
OR MY FAMILY MY TRUST IN MY
00:17:12.19\00:17:15.90
EXPECTATION MUST COME FROM
THE LORD HIS ONLY ONE THAT COULD
00:17:15.90\00:17:19.23
GIVE ME THE HOLY SPIRIT
CHARACTER AND IF WE HAVE THE
00:17:19.23\00:17:22.27
HOLY SPIRIT CHARACTER WE CAN GO
THROUGH ANYTHING ALL DAY LONG.
00:17:22.27\00:17:27.11
WE CAN GO THROUGH ANYTHING LOOK
AT THE DISCIPLES LOOK AT THE
00:17:27.11\00:17:29.81
CHURCH LOOK AT WHAT THEY WENT
RAIL AFTER THEY WERE FILLED WITH
00:17:29.81\00:17:33.68
HOLY SPIRIT NOTHING ELSE
MATTERED BUT JESUS CHRIST AND
00:17:33.68\00:17:36.69
THIS IS THE PICTURE WE ARE
SINGING AND MATTHEW 25 STARTS
00:17:36.69\00:17:40.92
WITH THE TEN VERSIONS AND
GOES TO THE TALENT BOTH OF THESE
00:17:40.92\00:17:45.13
PARALLEL PARABLES ARE RELATIONAL
EXPERIENCE THE GOD WANTS US TO
00:17:45.13\00:17:50.33
HAVE WITH HIM AND TO TAKE
A RELATIONSHIP OFF PEOPLE THE
00:17:50.33\00:17:54.80
NEGATIVE OF THIS IS REVEALED IN
THE WAY THAT THEY RESPONDED TO
00:17:54.80\00:18:00.81
THIS CRISIS OF SEVERE OIL
DEPENDENT ON PEOPLE DEPENDENT ON
00:18:00.81\00:18:03.88
OTHERS AND NOT DEPENDENT
ON GOD THEY DON'T HAVE THAT
00:18:03.88\00:18:08.15
RELATIONSHIP. >> BUT
TAKING IT FROM THE OTHER
00:18:08.15\00:18:11.35
SIDE I REMEMBER I USED TO READ
THIS AND PEOPLE THEY HAD THE
00:18:11.35\00:18:16.66
FIVE WISE MEN AND THEY
WERE LIKE GO BY YOUR OWN.
00:18:16.66\00:18:23.30
AND WHAT WAS THIS? BUT I
HAD TO LEARN THAT MOLLY'S
00:18:23.30\00:18:30.31
USED TO TELL ME
THAT HOW DID YOU PUT IT?
00:18:30.31\00:18:36.85
PEOPLE WHO SUCK THE
SPIRITUAL LIFE OUT OF.
00:18:36.85\00:18:40.72
SPIRITUAL BEACHES
THAT'S WHAT SHE CALLED IT.
00:18:40.72\00:18:43.52
AND SHE SAID YOU JUST HAVE TO
LOVE THOSE PEOPLE AND SHE SAYS
00:18:43.52\00:18:48.52
YOU CAN'T BE THEIR FIX OR HAVE
YOU EVER READ THE BOOK THE RACE.
00:18:48.52\00:18:56.06
HE GETS ALMOST ALL SCRIPTURE.
>> GOD IS THE BOUNDARY SETTING
00:18:56.06\00:19:02.60
GOD AND WHEN PEOPLE COME TO YOU
CAN'T ALWAYS COUNT ON YOUR WIFE
00:19:02.60\00:19:08.14
OR YOUR GOVERNMENT BUT WHEN
PEOPLE COME TO US TO PRODUCE
00:19:08.14\00:19:14.32
SOMETHING THAT THEY SHOULD
BE GOING TO GOD TO DO THEY WILL
00:19:14.32\00:19:18.35
NEED TO SET A BOUNDARY AND POINT
THEM IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION
00:19:18.35\00:19:22.52
INSTEAD OF
TRYING TO BE THEIR HERO.
00:19:22.52\00:19:26.80
>> WE ARE EMPATHIZING RIGHT NOW
WE'RE LICKING THIS LISTING OF
00:19:26.80\00:19:33.77
THE PERSON. THEY ARE
ALSO HAVING AN ENOUGH
00:19:33.77\00:19:40.31
COURAGE TO BE ASSERTIVE
THEMSELVES AND TO SHARE AN
00:19:40.31\00:19:42.88
OPINION AFTER WERE ALL FINISHED.
AFTER THEY'RE ALL FINISHED AND
00:19:42.88\00:19:46.31
WE HEARD THAT WE SHOULD WE ALSO
TO HAVE THESE BOUNDARIES AND
00:19:46.31\00:19:51.99
IT'S A GOOD BOOK THAT YOU
RECOMMENDING WE SHOULD LISTEN TO
00:19:51.99\00:19:59.56
PEOPLE THAT WE ALSO TO BE
CAREFUL FOR >> I OFTEN HAVE BEEN
00:19:59.56\00:20:21.25
IN SITUATIONS AND AM A PEOPLE
PLEASER AND I'M LISTENING AND
00:20:21.25\00:20:28.86
EMPATHIZING AND OVER-THE-TOP
EMPATHIZING JUST SO MUCH SO THAT
00:20:28.86\00:20:31.66
I WANT TO GET IN THE SITUATION
SOMETIMES AND VERY ASSERTIVE AND
00:20:31.66\00:20:48.88
PEOPLE SAY DID YOU SAY THIS OR
THAT IS YOUR OPINION OR ANYTHING
00:20:48.88\00:20:52.61
AND I SAY I DIDN'T AND I
PROBABLY BY I HAD A SITUATION
00:20:52.61\00:20:59.05
LIKE THIS APPEAR
>> THAT'S WELL PUT.
00:20:59.05\00:21:01.29
>> I HAD A SITUATION WHERE
SOMEBODY KEPT BRINGING UP A
00:21:01.29\00:21:06.86
CONVERSATION THAT WAS OVER THE
TOP AND JUST PUT ME ON -- I AM
00:21:06.86\00:21:15.47
LIKE THIS BUT THIS IS ONE OF
THOSE THINGS THAT I DON'T EVER
00:21:15.47\00:21:18.04
WANT TO HEAR IT AGAIN BUT
YOU CAN'T COME RIGHT OUT AND SAY
00:21:18.04\00:21:21.64
THAT BECAUSE YOU
HURT THEIR FEELINGS.
00:21:21.64\00:21:23.38
BUT WHAT I LEARNED IS THAT
THIS KIND OF CONVERSATION IS NOT
00:21:23.38\00:21:32.65
CONDUCIVE TO THE
GOOD WORK RELATIONSHIP.
00:21:32.65\00:21:34.59
OR YOU COULD SAY TO YOUR HUSBAND
HONEY, IF YOU SAY SUCH AND SUCH
00:21:34.59\00:21:43.00
THIS IS NOT REALLY BENEFICIAL
TO OUR LOVE RELATIONSHIP.
00:21:43.00\00:21:47.14
AND THE IT I BEGIN TO PUT
BOUNDARIES ON THIS AND AS SOON
00:21:47.14\00:21:52.34
AS I SAY I GO AWAY AND THAT'S
INTERESTING BUT YOU HAVE TO DO
00:21:52.34\00:21:56.81
IT WITH RESPECT. >> ABSOLUTELY.
00:21:56.81\00:21:59.61
>> AND WITH THESE EXPECTATIONS
I WANT TO CLARIFY THAT WE HAVE
00:21:59.61\00:22:04.89
HIGH EXPECTATIONS FOR OURSELVES
AND FOR EACH OTHER FOR OUR
00:22:04.89\00:22:08.89
RELATIONSHIPS WE DO.
IN TO SET THE BAR HIGH.
00:22:08.89\00:22:14.46
WE WANT TO WORK TOWARD THIS
BUT THERE'S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
00:22:14.46\00:22:18.83
THOSE KINDS OF EXPECTATIONS AND
HAVING A FALSE EXPECTATION AND
00:22:18.83\00:22:22.04
WHEN YOU LOOK AT JESUS CHRIST
AND THE PEOPLE HAVE REJECTED HIM
00:22:22.04\00:22:25.67
THEY HAD FALSE EXPECTATIONS
OF HIM AND WHO HE WAS AND WHO HE
00:22:25.67\00:22:29.88
WAS TO BE TO THEM YOU ARE
SUPPOSED TO GIVE ME FREEDOM FROM
00:22:29.88\00:22:32.45
THE ROMANS AND CAROL ALL THE
SICK PEOPLE AND THAT IS WHO YOU
00:22:32.45\00:22:36.58
ARE TO ME AND WHEN JESUS SAID
THIS IS WHO LIGHT AND I AM THE
00:22:36.58\00:22:41.09
BREAD OF LIFE AND I AM GOING TO
LAY DATE OF MY LIFE FOR YOU THEY
00:22:41.09\00:22:44.49
REJECTED HIS BEING ABOUT WHO
HE WAS FOR THEIR OWN AND SO THEY
00:22:44.49\00:22:49.63
HAD THOSE FALSE EXPECTATIONS
THAT WE CAN ENTER INTO A
00:22:49.63\00:22:52.67
MARRIAGE OF FALSE EXPECTATIONS
OF WHAT WE WANT THE OTHER PERSON
00:22:52.67\00:22:55.20
TO BE RATHER THAN WHO THEY ARE
WHICH IS WHY IT'S IMPORTANT TO
00:22:55.20\00:22:58.47
REALLY KNOW YOURSELF BEFORE YOU
GET MARRIED OR JUST BE WILLING
00:22:58.47\00:23:01.81
TO ACCEPT THIS IS THE MAN I
MARRIED AND I'M GOING TO LET HIM
00:23:01.81\00:23:04.38
FOR WHO HE IS AND NOT TRYING TO
FORM HIM INTO WHAT I WANT HIM TO
00:23:04.38\00:23:09.72
BE IN MY FALSE EXPECTATIONS.
>> I THINK YOU MIGHT NEED TO
00:23:09.72\00:23:16.12
REPEAT THAT.
EVERYBODY WANTS TO DO THINGS
00:23:16.12\00:23:19.89
THEIR WAY. I KNOW
BEST AND KNOW WHAT I
00:23:19.89\00:23:23.47
NEED. AND THEN
YOU WAKE UP AND I NEED
00:23:23.47\00:23:27.44
TO EXPLAIN BECAUSE YOU KIND
OF CHANGED THOUGHTS BUT THE MOST
00:23:27.44\00:23:33.38
IMPORTANT DECISION YOU'LL EVER
MAKE IS ACCEPTING CHRIST AS YOUR
00:23:33.38\00:23:36.64
SAVIOR BUT THE SECOND MOST
IMPORTANT DECISION YOU'LL EVER
00:23:36.64\00:23:40.08
MAKE IS WHO YOU MARRY.
>> LET ME UNDERSTAND THAT.
00:23:40.08\00:23:50.49
>> FALSE EXPECTATIONS
ARE RELATIONSHIP KILLERS.
00:23:50.49\00:23:55.56
>> ABSOLUTELY. >> IF
YOU WANT SOMEONE TO BE
00:23:55.56\00:24:00.40
YOUR EVERYTHING LIKE PEOPLE
WILL SAY YOU CAN COMPLETE ME.
00:24:00.40\00:24:07.08
WE ARE ONLY COMPLETED IN CHRIST
BUT IF YOU LOOK AT SOMEBODY AND
00:24:07.08\00:24:10.35
SAY THE WRONG THING THAN
ACTUALLY YOU'RE PUSHING A PERSON
00:24:10.35\00:24:14.88
AWAY BECAUSE THEY
CANNOT MEET YOUR EXPECTATIONS.
00:24:14.88\00:24:19.05
>> THIS IS SIGNIFICANT BUT
AGAIN LET'S BRING IT BACK TO THE
00:24:19.05\00:24:22.66
BIBLICAL PRINCIPLE WE TALKED
ABOUT IN THE SHOW ALSO I THINK
00:24:22.66\00:24:25.36
WITH JESUS IT WAS POWERFUL
TO RECOGNIZE AS RECEIPT SHARED,
00:24:25.36\00:24:31.63
THAT JESUS DID NOT CONFORM TO
THE EXPECTATION OF THE DISCIPLES
00:24:31.63\00:24:34.67
OF THE NATION AND THE GOVERNMENT
AND THE RELIGIOUS LEADERS HE GOD
00:24:34.67\00:24:39.07
GAVE HIM A MISSION AND HE STUCK
TO THIS MISSION BUT HE LOVES HIS
00:24:39.07\00:24:43.08
DISCIPLES IN THE END THAT HE
LOVED THE RELIGIOUS LEADERS I
00:24:43.08\00:24:47.85
LOVE THE ROMANS AND HE
PRAYED FOR THEM WHEN THEY WERE
00:24:47.85\00:24:51.55
PERSECUTED. AND THE
DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU
00:24:51.55\00:24:54.89
HAVE TO CONFORM TO PEOPLE'S
EXPECTATIONS APPEAR IS LEFT DOES
00:24:54.89\00:24:59.49
NOT MEAN YOU HAVE TO
AGREE WITH EVERYTHING.
00:24:59.49\00:25:03.77
BUT WHAT'S HAPPENING IS THE
WORD LOVE IS BEING HIJACKED AND
00:25:03.77\00:25:06.74
KIDNAPPED AND YOU NEED TO DO
THIS IF YOU REALLY LOVE AND IF
00:25:06.74\00:25:09.14
YOU REALLY LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR
YOU SHOULD DO THIS IF YOU REALLY
00:25:09.14\00:25:11.11
LOVE ME YOU SHOULD DO THIS
IF YOU REALLY LOVE THIS COUNTRY
00:25:11.11\00:25:14.31
WILL DO THIS NOW WE ARE GOING
TO DO WHAT GOD WANTS US TO DO.
00:25:14.31\00:25:18.35
WE WILL NOT CONFORM TO YOUR
EXPECTATIONS AND WE WILL NOT
00:25:18.35\00:25:21.02
PEOPLE PLEASE WE WILL DO WHAT
GOD HAS CALLED US TO DO BUT WE
00:25:21.02\00:25:23.72
WILL STILL LOVE YOU.
ACTUALLY WE CAN STILL DO IT.
00:25:23.72\00:25:27.92
CHRISTIANS CAN STILL LAB EVEN
THOUGH THEY DON'T CONFORM EVEN
00:25:27.92\00:25:30.73
THOUGH THEY DON'T
CONFORM. >> IT'S WAS IN A LOVING
00:25:30.73\00:25:34.10
RELATIONSHIP THAT WE
CAN MAINTAIN IDENTITY AND
00:25:34.10\00:25:37.97
INDIVIDUALITY AND IN A
RELATIONSHIP IN WHICH DO I WANT
00:25:37.97\00:25:44.01
YOU TO BE. THERE
IS MANIPULATION AND
00:25:44.01\00:25:47.04
COERCION AND ALL KINDS OF
DYSFUNCTIONAL WAYS OF RELATING
00:25:47.04\00:25:49.58
TO THE OTHER PERSON AND
THE FREEDOM IS GONE AND THAT IS
00:25:49.58\00:25:53.82
MISERABLE. >> THAT'S
REVELATION 13 AND 14.
00:25:53.82\00:25:57.02
THE BEAST, THE DRAGON
VERSUS THE EVERLASTING GOSPEL.
00:25:57.02\00:26:00.92
IN FREEDOM THAT GOD GIVES US TO
WORSHIP OR NOT WORSHIP HIM AND
00:26:00.92\00:26:04.39
THOSE OF THE PRINCIPLES WERE
LOOKING AT IN FACT REVELATION 13
00:26:04.39\00:26:07.93
IS THERE WE WERE LOOKING AT
BEAST WITH A LAMB LIKE HORNS.
00:26:07.93\00:26:15.64
AND THAT CIVIL FREEDOM OF
RELIGIOUS FREEDOM AND WE SEE
00:26:15.64\00:26:18.31
THAT HERE IN THE EXPERIENCES
OF GOD'S PEOPLE IN THE BIBLE.
00:26:18.31\00:26:22.28
I MEAN, THERE IS EXPERIENCE
AFTER EXPERIENCE AND CHAPTER
00:26:22.28\00:26:25.38
AFTER CHAPTER THAT BRINGS AT THE
SAME PRINCIPLES IN ALL OF THEM
00:26:25.38\00:26:29.08
CULMINATE IN THE
BOOK OF REVELATION.
00:26:29.08\00:26:31.69
REVELATION 13 AND 14 AND MATTHEW
24 HAPPENS TO BE A PARALLEL TO
00:26:31.69\00:26:35.16
THE BOOK OF REVELATION IT IS
THE LAST DAY OF THE PARALLEL BUT
00:26:35.16\00:26:40.56
MATTHEW 25 IT UNPACKS THE
RELATIONAL DYNAMICS THAT IS
00:26:40.56\00:26:44.73
ACTUALLY
HAPPENING BEHIND THE SCENES.
00:26:44.73\00:26:46.17
THIS IS REALLY
WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT.
00:26:46.17\00:26:52.04
GATHER WARMTH OF THE OTHER
ENCOURAGE FROM THEIR COWARDICE
00:26:52.04\00:26:55.14
TO LOVE THE WORLD AS CHRIST
LOVED THE WORLD AND THE MISSION
00:26:55.14\00:26:59.21
IS ACCOMPLISHED THAT PERSEVERE
TO THE END AND SO THE LOVE DOES
00:26:59.21\00:27:03.69
NOT WAX COLD THIS IS THE
RELATIONSHIP WE THINK IT'S ABOUT
00:27:03.69\00:27:07.42
A DOCTORING OR A DAY BUT
THE CRISIS IS ABOUT CHARACTER.
00:27:07.42\00:27:14.50
IN PLACE THAT HAPPENS NOT TO
SINGLE PEOPLE OUT BUT GOD GIVES
00:27:14.50\00:27:20.87
US PARTNERS WIVES HUSBANDS
TO SMOOTH OUT A ROUGH EDGES AND
00:27:20.87\00:27:23.47
GROW AS IMMATURE AS TO
HELP US TO GET TO THAT PLACE.
00:27:23.47\00:27:28.11
HELP ME. HELP ME PLEASE HELP ME.
00:27:28.11\00:27:32.95
>> TO ME WITH SO IMPORTANT AND
THIS IS -- IN YOUR WALK NOW YOU
00:27:32.95\00:27:43.06
HAVE FOUR EYES INSTEAD OF TWO
AND YOU'RE LOOKING IN THE SAME
00:27:43.06\00:27:48.33
DIRECTION. >>
SOMEONE FROM CALIFORNIA HAS
00:27:48.33\00:27:55.40
WRITTEN AND SAID HOW DO YOU GET
SOMEONE TO START COMMUNICATING
00:27:55.40\00:27:59.67
MORE WHEN THEY ARE AND
ADMITTED PERSON A FEW WORDS?
00:27:59.67\00:28:08.88
>> RECEIPT TAKE THAT QUESTION.
>> I WOULD CHERISH THE FEW WORDS
00:28:08.88\00:28:14.82
BECAUSE YOU CANNOT MAKE SOMEONE
AT THE END OF THE DAY A PERSON
00:28:14.82\00:28:18.86
WITH FEW WORDS MANY WORDS IN A
PERSON OF MANY WORDS FEW WORDS.
00:28:18.86\00:28:22.26
IF THEY ARE COMFORTABLE
AND DON'T FEEL LIKE THEY ARE
00:28:22.26\00:28:24.87
ATTACKED HOW CAN I TRULY CHERISH
THE MAN THAT I MARRIED WITH A
00:28:24.87\00:28:27.67
MAN OF FEW WORDS CAN I HAVE
THOSE FEW WORDS MEAN A LOT TO
00:28:27.67\00:28:32.27
ME? CAN THEY BE WELL CHOSEN AND
00:28:32.27\00:28:34.84
COMMUNICATE TO ME THE THINGS
THAT ARE IMPORTANT MAY BE ON
00:28:34.84\00:28:38.11
THIS ISSUE OR EXPRESSING YOUR
LOVE ET CETERA BUT I WOULD HAVE
00:28:38.11\00:28:41.92
THAT OPEN COMMUNICATION. I
WANT TO ACCEPT YOU FULLY FOR
00:28:41.92\00:28:44.59
WHO YOU ARE A MAN OF FEW WORDS
BUT I NEED THOSE FEW WORDS TO
00:28:44.59\00:28:48.16
COUNT AND TO REGISTER
THEM. >> AND THAT COULD LEAD TO
00:28:48.16\00:28:54.46
FORWARD TO JUST DON'T KNOW.
>> SYMPTOMS OR A TOPIC IS IF YOU
00:28:54.46\00:28:57.47
WE WOULD SAY SOMETHING
THAT WILL BE USED AGAINST US.
00:28:57.47\00:29:02.87
WE WILL EXPRESS OUR HEARTS AND
COMMUNICATE WHAT'S ON OUR MIND
00:29:02.87\00:29:05.84
AND WILL BE TURNED AS A WEAPON.
SO NOW I AM MORE FREE THAN I
00:29:05.84\00:29:12.88
USED TO BE BECAUSE I HAVE GONE
THROUGH EXPERIENCES LIKE THAT IN
00:29:12.88\00:29:15.15
THE PAST BUT THIS IS MY WIFE AND
I TRUST HER AND SO NOW I WILL
00:29:15.15\00:29:19.49
OPEN MY HEART AND TELL HER.
OF COURSE THE REASON WHY I DO
00:29:19.49\00:29:23.16
THAT SO QUICKLY NOW IS BECAUSE
IF I WAIT IT WILL COME OUT IN A
00:29:23.16\00:29:28.66
BURST OF ANGER RATHER THAN JUST
THIS NICE CALM COMMUNICATION AND
00:29:28.66\00:29:35.47
I KNOW HER INITIAL RESPONSE
MIGHT CAUSE ME TOO ACTUALLY DO
00:29:35.47\00:29:39.54
THIS AND IF I COME OUT I SAY
NOPE ACTUALLY I AM FINE I AM NOT
00:29:39.54\00:29:44.15
UPSET AND WHEREAS BEFORE IT
WOULD HAVE BEEN IF I BROUGHT UP
00:29:44.15\00:29:47.48
SOMETHING LIKE THIS BECAUSE I
WAS UPSET NOW IT'S MORE LIKE NOW
00:29:47.48\00:29:50.52
BECAUSE I WANT TO PROCESS BEFORE
I GET TO THAT PLACE NOT WRONG TO
00:29:50.52\00:29:56.89
BE ANGRY. WHY ARE YOU ANGRY?
00:29:56.89\00:29:59.63
BECAUSE I FELT LIKE THE WAY YOU
JUST ACTED AND WHAT YOU JUST DID
00:29:59.63\00:30:05.07
WAS DISRESPECTFUL OR IT WAS
UNLOVING AND SO I'M TALKING TO
00:30:05.07\00:30:09.40
YOU ABOUT IT. ANGER
IS NOT SOMETHING THAT IS
00:30:09.40\00:30:12.47
WRONG IF IT IS AGAIN SOMETHING
YOU FEEL WAS LIKE BUT THEN I SAY
00:30:12.47\00:30:18.41
I DID NOT KNOW YOU FELT THAT WAY
OR DID NOT MAKE YOU FEEL THAT
00:30:18.41\00:30:22.78
WAY AND SO OKAY HONEY I'M SORRY
I JUST TOOK IT THAT WAY UNTIL HE
00:30:22.78\00:30:26.86
RECONCILED THE HOLE PROCESS.
THE HOLE PROCESS HELPS US
00:30:26.86\00:30:30.79
RECONCILE AND THEN I HAVE
THIS HOLE STUFF AND SHE CAN'T
00:30:30.79\00:30:35.40
REMEMBER TEN
DAYS AGO WHAT SHE DID.
00:30:35.40\00:30:43.57
>> I ALSO WANT TO SAY WHEN I
WAS RAISING MY CHILDREN AND THE
00:30:43.57\00:30:48.78
CHILDREN WERE SMALL AND I WOULD
CATCH THEM DOING SOMETHING GOOD
00:30:48.78\00:30:52.55
WE GET A LOT OF ATTENTION TO
THE POOR BEHAVIOR THAT KIND OF
00:30:52.55\00:30:58.35
ACCENTUATES THAT BUT WHEN YOU
CATCH SOMEONE DOING GOOD AND YOU
00:30:58.35\00:31:03.02
WERE THEM FOR THAT IN WHATEVER
WAY THAT THEY EXPERIENCE REWARD
00:31:03.02\00:31:08.20
THEY'RE MORE LIKELY TO OPEN UP
AND BOUGHT BLOSSOM AND SELL THAT
00:31:08.20\00:31:12.57
COULD ANOTHER
TECHNIQUE YOU KNOW.
00:31:12.57\00:31:16.81
YOU COULD TRY IT. >>
AND ITS MONKEY SEE MONKEY DO
00:31:16.81\00:31:20.81
THEY LEARN THEMSELVES. >>
I DON'T REMEMBER THE AUTHOR
00:31:20.81\00:31:22.68
WAS WHO SPOKE ABOUT THIS BUT
EVERY TIME IF YOU THINK ABOUT A
00:31:22.68\00:31:27.78
BANK ACCOUNT LIKE YOU HAVE A
BANK ACCOUNT AND EVERY TIME YOU
00:31:27.78\00:31:33.49
DO SOMETHING POSITIVE FOR
SOMEONE YOU ARE DEPOSITING IN
00:31:33.49\00:31:37.66
THEIR ACCOUNT AND THAT YOU ARE
DEPOSITING INTO THEIR ACCOUNT
00:31:37.66\00:31:45.57
MAY BE WORDS OF AFFIRMATION OR
ACTS OF SERVICE BUT WHEN YOU DO
00:31:45.57\00:31:50.34
SOMETHING FOR THAT PERSON THAT
BANK ACCOUNT AND EMOTIONAL BANK
00:31:50.34\00:31:54.34
ACCOUNT START STARTS FILLING
UP BUT I GUARANTEE YOU ONE THING
00:31:54.34\00:31:57.78
THAT I HAVE REALLY WATCHED AND
PEOPLE CAN DO GOOD THINGS AND IT
00:31:57.78\00:32:02.95
CAN FILL UP THEIR BANK ACCOUNT
BUT IF YOU DO SOMETHING NEGATIVE
00:32:02.95\00:32:08.12
THAT TAKES AWAY A
FISTFUL OF STUFF ALL AT ONCE.
00:32:08.12\00:32:11.96
ALL THE GOOD THINGS.
THE NEGATIVE IS A MUCH MORE
00:32:11.96\00:32:17.40
IMPACTFUL THAN IF SOMEBODY LIKE
YOU SAID IT WITH YOUR CHILDREN
00:32:17.40\00:32:23.04
IF CHILDREN ARE ONLY CRITICIZED
OR CONDEMNED FOR THEIR ERRORS IF
00:32:23.04\00:32:27.84
YOU ARE NOT AFFIRMING THEM AND
YOU'RE NOT DOING SOMETHING GOOD
00:32:27.84\00:32:31.45
FOR THEM KIDS TO GET
HER A REALLY REBELLIOUS.
00:32:31.45\00:32:34.78
THEY GET TO THE POINT OF I CAN'T
PLEASE MOM AND DAD ANYWAY WHO
00:32:34.78\00:32:42.59
CARES. >> ARE
NEVER TELLING JAMES THAT
00:32:42.59\00:32:44.79
COMMUNICATION, VERBAL
COMMUNICATION IS THE BEST KIND
00:32:44.79\00:32:46.13
OF FOREPLAY. AND SO
FOR A MAN TO UNDERSTAND.
00:32:46.13\00:32:54.40
>> THAT'S MOTIVATION. >>
ANOTHER THING IS THAT WE HAVE
00:32:54.40\00:33:03.01
DONE THAT HAS BEEN SIGNIFICANT
IS THAT I WILL OPEN UP WHICH IS
00:33:03.01\00:33:05.41
BEEN A HARD THING FOR ME TOO DO
OVER THE YEARS I DO IT MORE AND
00:33:05.41\00:33:08.22
MORE NOW BUT IN THE PAST I HAVE
NOT AND SHE WAS SAY THANK YOU
00:33:08.22\00:33:10.72
FOR SHARING THAT WITH ME EVEN
THOUGH MAYBE SHE WAS HARD OR SHE
00:33:10.72\00:33:14.62
HURT OR WHATEVER BUT THANK
YOU OPEN UP AND SHARING AND THAT
00:33:14.62\00:33:17.86
REAFFIRMS THAT THIS WAS
A THING THAT IT'S A DEAL.
00:33:17.86\00:33:25.70
INTERESTING. HOW
SMALL HOW LITTLE THOSE
00:33:25.70\00:33:32.67
WEDGES -- THE THINGS THAT
DEVELOP INTO ARGUMENTS HOW
00:33:32.67\00:33:36.81
LITTLE IT STARTS WITH JUST
A SMALL THING AND HOW LITTLE
00:33:36.81\00:33:40.58
THINGS SUCH AS SMALL THINGS CAN
MAKE SUCH A HUGE DIFFERENT AND
00:33:40.58\00:33:45.39
IT RECONCILE YOU. WE
THINK IT'S THE BIG THINGS BUT
00:33:45.39\00:33:47.52
MANY TIMES IT'S
JUST A LITTLE THINGS.
00:33:47.52\00:33:50.19
>> TELL US ABOUT
RESPECT. OF GOING TO EMPATHY,
00:33:50.19\00:33:56.53
ASSERTIVENESS, AND NOW RESPECT.
LET'S GET THE HOLE PICTURE.
00:33:56.53\00:34:02.40
>> RESPECT IS THE THING THAT
BREAKS DOWN IN THE COURSE OF
00:34:02.40\00:34:10.88
EMPATHY AND ASSERTIVENESS.
I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO YOU BUT
00:34:10.88\00:34:13.42
TELL US ABOUT RESPECT. AND
I AM YOU KNOW SAYING I DON'T
00:34:13.42\00:34:16.85
WANT TO GET TO
RESPECT RIGHT NOW.
00:34:16.85\00:34:19.79
NOPE I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT
RIGHT NOW I HAE SOMETHING ELSE
00:34:19.79\00:34:22.99
I WANT TO DO. AND SO
THE DISCOURSE MY VOICE
00:34:22.99\00:34:27.60
RAISES AND THEN YOU SAY WAIT
A MINUTE I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT
00:34:27.60\00:34:31.60
IT'S KIND OF LIKE WHEN WE ARGUE
ABOUT THESE THINGS AT THE VOICE
00:34:31.60\00:34:37.04
IS RAISED WE BECOME
DISRESPECTFUL AND DISRESPECT IS
00:34:37.04\00:34:40.88
PROBABLY THE ULTIMATE REVELATION
THAT THE CONVERSATION HAS LACKED
00:34:40.88\00:34:45.08
EMPATHY AND ASSERTIVENESS.
WE ACTUALLY START ACTING AND
00:34:45.08\00:34:48.82
TALKING AND RELATING IN WAYS
THAT ARE DISTANCING AND HURTING.
00:34:48.82\00:34:53.25
COULD JOB AND HIS FRIENDS DID
THAT IN JOB GOT INTO IT AS WELL
00:34:53.25\00:34:57.46
HE WAS
DISRESPECTFUL TO HIS FRIENDS.
00:34:57.46\00:35:00.30
IF YOU CALL SOMEONE WORTHLESS
POSITION THEY HAVE BEEN TO
00:35:00.30\00:35:04.30
SCHOOL EIGHT YEARS OR MISERABLE
COMFORTERS THEY SAT WITH YOU FOR
00:35:04.30\00:35:08.10
A WEEK. SO JOB OF
HIS RELATIONAL EQUITY
00:35:08.10\00:35:15.98
OR -- SO JOB WAS LOSING
HIS RECREATIONAL EQUITY OR BANK
00:35:15.98\00:35:21.02
ACCOUNT WITH HIS FRIENDS AND HE
REMEMBERS THAT WHEN GOD CAME HE
00:35:21.02\00:35:24.62
WAS LIKE YES AND HE STARTED
PRAYING FOR HIS FRIENDS AND
00:35:24.62\00:35:27.62
THAT'S ONE OF THE KEY THINGS YOU
CAN DO TO GET US BACK ON TRACK
00:35:27.62\00:35:31.39
BECAUSE IT'S HARD TO MISTREAT
SOMEONE AND BE DISRESPECTFUL TO
00:35:31.39\00:35:34.83
SOMEONE THAT YOU ARE PRAYING
FOR BECAUSE YOU WANT TO SEE THE
00:35:34.83\00:35:38.00
PRAYERS ANSWERED AND
IT STARTS RIGHT THERE.
00:35:38.00\00:35:44.17
>> THIS CAN COME FROM TWO
DIFFERENT SCHOOLS OBVIOUSLY WE
00:35:44.17\00:35:48.18
ARE AT IMPASSE AND SO I FIND
MYSELF SAYING LET'S JUST AGREE
00:35:48.18\00:35:53.38
TO DISAGREE. WHY
DON'T YOU PRAY FOR ME AND
00:35:53.38\00:35:55.38
I'LL PRAY FOR YOU AND JUST
IT'S AMAZING HOW THAT WORKS.
00:35:55.38\00:36:01.46
IF THEY HAVE AN ATTITUDE AND
THEY GOT UP ON THE WRONG SIDE OF
00:36:01.46\00:36:06.46
THE BED THEN NOPE
LET'S GET BACK IN THE MIDDLE.
00:36:06.46\00:36:08.60
BUT THAT RARELY HAPPENS.
MOST PEOPLE THEY DO WANT TO COME
00:36:08.60\00:36:13.64
TO SOME TYPE OF
AGREEMENT EVEN IF THEY DISAGREE.
00:36:13.64\00:36:17.04
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS.
THAT'S OR TALKING ABOUT HERE.
00:36:17.04\00:36:21.64
>> WHAT IF WHEN IT YOU HAD THAT
CONVERSATION ON THE PHONE THAT
00:36:21.64\00:36:24.35
YOU TALKED ABOUT WHEN YOU ARE
KIND OF CONDESCENDING AND WHAT
00:36:24.35\00:36:29.05
IF INSTEAD SHELLEY COMMUNICATED
TO YOU SOMETHING LIKE A JD, I
00:36:29.05\00:36:32.09
SEE WHAT YOU ARE SAYING BUT YOU
THINK THIS THIS THIS AND I CAN
00:36:32.09\00:36:36.73
SEE WHY YOU WOULD COME TO THAT
CONCLUSION HAVE YOU CONSIDERED
00:36:36.73\00:36:41.33
THIS? THIS IS
ANOTHER THOUGHT AND SO
00:36:41.33\00:36:43.87
YOU KNOW IT WON'T WORK
THAT MIGHT BE A LITTLE BIT MORE
00:36:43.87\00:36:48.87
RESPECTFUL BECAUSE SHE IS
VALIDATING THAT YOU THOUGHT IT'S
00:36:48.87\00:36:51.71
THROUGH YOUR PERSPECTIVE AND
SO WHEN I TRY TO SEE THINGS FROM
00:36:51.71\00:36:55.61
JAMES' PERSPECTIVE RATHER THAN
IMMEDIATELY DEFENDING MYSELF FOR
00:36:55.61\00:36:59.15
SAYING NO THAT'S NOT WHAT
HAPPENED THEN I AM ENTERING INTO
00:36:59.15\00:37:04.05
A RESPECTFUL VIDEO BECAUSE I AM
VALIDATING THIS THOUGHT PROCESS.
00:37:04.05\00:37:08.02
>> AND YOU'RE LEARNING MORE
ABOUT EACH OTHER MAYBE HOW TO
00:37:08.02\00:37:11.93
APPROACH THINGS DIFFERENTLY
OR SAY IT DIFFERENTLY.
00:37:11.93\00:37:18.13
THESE ARE THINGS
TO GET ALL WORK ON.
00:37:18.13\00:37:22.20
>> A JD HAS A GREAT LINE THAT HE
HAS TAUGHT ME AND I'M USING IT
00:37:22.20\00:37:27.61
WHEN SOMEONE COMES TO HIM IN AN
ARGUMENTATIVE FASHION AND THEY
00:37:27.61\00:37:34.82
HAVE THEY HAVE TO SAY AND THEY
ARE TALKING ABOUT SOMEONE AND
00:37:34.82\00:37:39.99
THEY WANT HIS OPINION A LOT OF
TIMES YOU SAY WE JUST DON'T HAVE
00:37:39.99\00:37:44.09
ENOUGH INFORMATION YET.
AND THAT IS FINE WITH PEOPLE
00:37:44.09\00:37:48.20
BECAUSE THEY REALIZE THAT WE
DON'T HAVE ENOUGH INFORMATION
00:37:48.20\00:37:52.10
AND IT IS RESPECTFUL THAT THEY
ASK THE OPINION AND IT'S JUST I
00:37:52.10\00:37:58.17
DON'T KNOW WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH
INFORMATION YET AND HE JUST
00:37:58.17\00:38:03.61
EXTRACTED THEM FROM THIS QUICK
SAND THAT THEY'RE TRYING TO DRAW
00:38:03.61\00:38:06.85
HIM INTO. IT'S INTERESTING.
00:38:06.85\00:38:09.35
>> AND I SEE THAT. I
SEE THAT IN THE BOOK.
00:38:09.35\00:38:14.52
HERE'S ANOTHER BIBLICAL I THINK
YOU KNOW HOW WE CAN MAINTAIN THE
00:38:14.52\00:38:19.83
LAW IN A RELATIONSHIP WHERE
WE HAVE MAYBE THIS POTENTIAL FOR
00:38:19.83\00:38:24.87
MAJOR BREAKOUT AND SO
DANIEL CHAPTER ONE, DANIEL IS IN
00:38:24.87\00:38:28.97
BABYLON AND HE HAS BEEN GIVEN
A PORTION OF THE KINGS FOOD AND
00:38:28.97\00:38:32.17
THE KING'S STRENGTHS AND HE
PURPOSE IS IN HIS HEART THAT HE
00:38:32.17\00:38:36.28
CAN'T DO THAT'S. IT'S
CONSCIENTIOUS THAT HE CAN'T
00:38:36.28\00:38:38.81
DO THIS HE CAN'T TAKE THIS TO
TRISH BABYLON AND SO HE TELL US
00:38:38.81\00:38:44.55
MEL CZAR, AND THE BELLS
ARE AND DANIEL HAD A LOVING
00:38:44.55\00:38:48.62
RELATIONSHIP. AND THE
LOVING RELATIONSHIP BUT
00:38:48.62\00:38:51.03
GUESS WHAT, THEY COMPLETELY
DISAGREE ABOUT THIS ISSUE.
00:38:51.03\00:38:55.16
THEY COMPLETELY DISAGREE AND NOW
WE HAVE OUR READINGS WITH THE
00:38:55.16\00:38:59.77
ANNUAL AND YOU WILL GET SICK IF
YOU DON'T EAT THIS FOOD IT WILL
00:38:59.77\00:39:02.14
MAKE YOU SICK. AND
YOU WILL ENDANGER MY LIFE
00:39:02.14\00:39:07.18
FOR THE KING. UP MY
LIFE IS AT RISK HERE IF
00:39:07.18\00:39:09.08
YOU DON'T EAT THIS
FOOD AND YOU WILL GET SICK.
00:39:09.08\00:39:11.91
CAN END UP BUT THE
LOVING RELATIONSHIP PREVAILS.
00:39:11.91\00:39:16.72
IT HAS EMPATHY WITH AND IT HAS
ASSERTIVENESS DANIEL SAYS WELL,
00:39:16.72\00:39:21.96
HOW ABOUT TRYING
THIS FOR TEN DAYS.
00:39:21.96\00:39:28.40
BY THE WAY, HE SAYS, ALL YOUR
OTHER FRIENDS AREN'T DOING THIS
00:39:28.40\00:39:31.23
TO LOOK AT ALL THESE
OTHER GUYS EATING THIS FOOD.
00:39:31.23\00:39:34.37
YOUR HOLE CHURCH IS DOING THIS
YOU SHOULD DO IT TOO AND HE SAYS
00:39:34.37\00:39:39.81
TIME FOR TEN DAYS AND SHE COMES
AND NO RESPECT MALLS ARE AND
00:39:39.81\00:39:44.58
MALLS ARE RESPECTED DANIEL AND
THE REASON I THOUGHT OF THIS IS
00:39:44.58\00:39:49.38
BECAUSE DD WAS SOMETIMES SICK.
>> LET'S SEE IF THIS WORKS.
00:39:49.38\00:39:58.66
SURE ENOUGH HE PROVES HIMSELF IS
FOLLOWING GOD HE IS COMPLETELY
00:39:58.66\00:40:05.83
SURRENDER TO GOD HE WANTS TO DO
THINGS GOD'S WAY AND GOD BLESS
00:40:05.83\00:40:11.14
IS THAT. OF COURSE
WE KNOW THE REST OF
00:40:11.14\00:40:13.54
THE STORY AND THAT TEST CAME
BEFORE ANY OF THE OTHER WHATEVER
00:40:13.54\00:40:19.21
IT WAS. SO A LOT
OF TIMES WE ARE LINKED
00:40:19.21\00:40:23.99
TO THESE LOVING RELATIONSHIPS.
THIS WAS EVEN PART OF DANIEL'S
00:40:23.99\00:40:29.06
LITTLE CHURCH.
COMPLETELY OUT HERE.
00:40:29.06\00:40:32.36
THE CAPTAIN OF THE
KING'S GUARD ET CETERA.
00:40:32.36\00:40:34.56
HE WAS IN A GOVERNMENTAL
POSITION AND HE COULD HAVE JUST
00:40:34.56\00:40:36.73
COME DOWN TO BABYLON BUT
HE HAD A LOVING RELATIONSHIP.
00:40:36.73\00:40:40.90
AND DANIEL MUST'VE HAD A LOVING
ATTITUDE TOWARD HIM FOR THAT
00:40:40.90\00:40:44.94
RELATIONSHIP TO DEVELOP.
SO JUST BECAUSE WE ARE FROM
00:40:44.94\00:40:47.54
DIFFERENT CULTURES OR DIFFERENT
LEVELS OF GOVERNMENT VERSUS
00:40:47.54\00:40:50.41
RELIGION WE CAN STILL HAVE
A LOVING RELATIONSHIP THAT CAN
00:40:50.41\00:40:58.49
FOSTER EMPATHY AND RESPECT.
>> EVEN DIFFERENT POLITICAL
00:40:58.49\00:41:02.46
PARTIES? >> ABSOLUTELY.
00:41:02.46\00:41:05.59
>> THE NEXT POINT THAT WE WANT
TO GET TO BEFORE THE TIME RUNS
00:41:05.59\00:41:08.96
OUT IS THAT THERE ARE
ANOTHER GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO WERE
00:41:08.96\00:41:15.84
DIFFERENTIATED THOSE WHO
HAVE INCREASED AND IMPROVE THEIR
00:41:15.84\00:41:19.67
TALENT AND THOSE WHO DID NOT
APPEAR AND I THINK THAT HAS A
00:41:19.67\00:41:24.55
LOT TO DO WITH RELATIONSHIPS
FISHERMEN TO BE HER FIRST
00:41:24.55\00:41:28.48
CORINTHIANS 12 IN WHICH
THERE ARE GIFTS OF THE SPIRIT.
00:41:28.48\00:41:37.96
AND I WAS THINK ABOUT HOW YOUR
TALK ABOUT EXPECTATIONS AND THAT
00:41:37.96\00:41:41.13
THERE ARE DEFINITELY PEOPLE WHO
HAVE RECEIVED MORE TALENT THAN
00:41:41.13\00:41:45.10
ANOTHER AND THERE MAY BE AS
WOMEN WE HAVE HIGH EXPECTATIONS
00:41:45.10\00:41:48.40
OF WHAT WON WANT THE HUSBAND MAY
BE WE AND EDUCATED AND A GOOD
00:41:48.40\00:41:55.61
PROVIDER. AND
GOOD AND ATHLETIC AND
00:41:55.61\00:41:59.51
ADVENTURESOME AND ROMANTIC
WE WANT THEM TO HAVE ALL THESE
00:41:59.51\00:42:01.45
TALENTS IN ONE MAN AND YES THERE
ARE TALENTED MEN OUT THERE AND
00:42:01.45\00:42:08.22
IF ALL THOSE ARE SUPER IMPORTANT
THE NEW YOU BETTER MARRY A FIVE
00:42:08.22\00:42:12.33
TALENT MAN BUT WITHIN A
RELATIONSHIP I WAS THINKING HOW
00:42:12.33\00:42:16.33
IMPORTANT IT IS THAT
WE BRING OUR TALENTS.
00:42:16.33\00:42:23.34
TALENTS USED ARE TALENTS THAT
ARE INCREASED AND PROFITS AND
00:42:23.34\00:42:26.14
THOSE ARE THE WORDS USED IN
THAT PARABLE IS AND THOSE OF THE
00:42:26.14\00:42:28.51
WORDS USED IN POWER BELL.
AND IF I WANT TO GROW IT IS AN
00:42:28.51\00:42:33.35
INVESTMENT BUT IF I WANT TO GROW
AND EXPERIENCE INCREASE IN MY
00:42:33.35\00:42:36.55
RELATIONSHIP THAN I WILL
BRING THE TALENT THAT GOD INTO
00:42:36.55\00:42:42.92
MINISTERING TO MY HUSBAND.
YOU HEARD OF THE COBBLER'S
00:42:42.92\00:42:47.50
CHILDREN DON'T HAVE SHOES OR THE
CARPENTER'S HOME IS NEVER DONE
00:42:47.50\00:42:50.63
BECAUSE WE ARE DOING SO GOOD
OUT THERE BUT WHAT ABOUT IN THE
00:42:50.63\00:42:54.90
HOME? WHAT IF I
BRING MY BEST, THE
00:42:54.90\00:42:57.31
BEST OF MY TALENT INTO
MINISTERING TO THAT PERSON?
00:42:57.31\00:43:00.34
OR TO MAKE IT THERE WOULD
WHATEVER AND THEN THERE WILL BE
00:43:00.34\00:43:32.74
>> I THINK THERE WILL BE
INTIMACY IS THE END GOAL.
00:43:32.74\00:43:42.58
>> IF IS THEY COULD JUST LISTEN
TO THESE TOOLS THEY COULD BUILD
00:43:42.58\00:43:46.62
OFF OF THIS. HOW MANY
YEARS BUT THEY DO ELSE
00:43:46.62\00:43:54.20
POSITIVE MAYBE IF THEY WAIT THEY
COULD FIND OUT THAT THEY HAVE A
00:43:54.20\00:44:23.83
FIVE TALENTED
HUSBAND. THIS IS A STUFF.
00:44:23.83\00:44:30.93
>> LET'S TAKE THIS INTO THE
PARABLE, YOU REMEMBER THE SERVER
00:44:30.93\00:44:36.00
THAT HAD ONE TALENT
AND WHAT DO YOU DO WITH IT?
00:44:36.00\00:44:39.34
>> BURIED IT. >> IT
WAS NEVER DISCOVERED,
00:44:39.34\00:44:41.88
NEVER USED, WHY DID HE BURY IT?
>> HE BURIED IT BECAUSE HE HAD A
00:44:41.88\00:44:47.72
MISUNDERSTANDING
WITH GOD'S CHARACTER.
00:44:47.72\00:44:52.19
>> IF WE COME ACROSS AS A HARD
PERSON WE CAN BECAUSE PEOPLE TO
00:44:52.19\00:44:55.82
BEAR THEIR TALENTS.
THE WAY PEOPLE SEE GOD IS
00:44:55.82\00:45:07.80
THROUGH US AND THEREFORE TALENTS
ARE BURIED BECAUSE OF THE WAY
00:45:07.80\00:45:10.41
THAT WE ARE
PROJECTING THE CHARACTER OF GOD.
00:45:10.41\00:45:12.34
WE AS CHRISTIANS HAVE A HUGE
APPLICATION TO THIS WORLD TO
00:45:12.34\00:45:16.38
REVEAL WHAT GOD IS REALLY
LIKE AND TO HELP PEOPLE ON EARTH
00:45:16.38\00:45:20.48
THOSE TALENTS THAT THEY ARE
BURYING AND USE THEM AND LET
00:45:20.48\00:45:23.75
THEM GROW AND BE MULTIPLIED.
>> I REMEMBER MY SISTER IN TEXAS
00:45:23.75\00:45:34.36
AND I HEARD HER ON THE PHONE
WITH HER HUSBAND AND SHE SAID
00:45:34.36\00:45:39.53
YOU OUGHT TO HEAR THIS IT'S
HONEY WOULD YOU PLEASE HONEY
00:45:39.53\00:45:44.11
THIS THANK YOU THIS AND
SHE SAID IT IS DISGUSTING.
00:45:44.11\00:45:47.14
SHE SAID THEY ARE MORE POLITE TO
EACH OTHER THAN THEY WOULD BE TO
00:45:47.14\00:45:51.18
A STRANGER. SO WHEN
SHE CAME OUT I SAID,
00:45:51.18\00:45:55.12
DON'T THINK YOU OUGHT TO
BE? ISN'T IT SUPPOSED TO BE THE
00:45:55.12\00:46:00.19
PLACE WHERE YOU
FIND THE MOST COMFORT?
00:46:00.19\00:46:03.06
WELL COUPLE NIGHTS LATER I
HEARD HER ON THE PHONE WITH HER
00:46:03.06\00:46:06.09
HUSBAND AND SHE SAID
HONEY WE ARE TO GIVE THIS A TRY.
00:46:06.09\00:46:14.94
BUT THE POINT I'M MAKING IS THAT
OUR HOME SHOULD BE A REFLECTION
00:46:14.94\00:46:19.77
OF THE LOVE OF GOD.
THERE IS NO COMPETITION AMONGST
00:46:19.77\00:46:29.58
THEM THERE IS NO KNOCK DOWN
DRAG OUT AND IF I CAN'T BE MORE
00:46:29.58\00:46:33.15
POLITE TO MY HUSBAND AND I WOULD
BE TO A STRANGER THAN SOMETHING
00:46:33.15\00:46:39.36
IT IS WRONG. >>
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL BIBLICAL
00:46:39.36\00:46:41.10
PICTURE THAT WE FIND EVERYWHERE
WE EVEN FIND IN ABOUT THE SHEEP
00:46:41.10\00:46:45.63
IN THE GOAT. YES
THE SHEEP AND THE GOAT.
00:46:45.63\00:46:50.01
WHAT ARE THE QUALITIES
THAT SEPARATE THE SHEEP FROM THE
00:46:50.01\00:46:55.94
GOAT? MATTHEW 25 WHAT ARE THE
00:46:55.94\00:47:00.38
QUALITIES THAT DIFFERENTIATE
IT SHEEP AND THE GOAT?
00:47:00.38\00:47:05.39
>> THERE ARE THE TEN VIRGINS
THAN THE TALENTS OF THE SERVANT
00:47:05.39\00:47:08.39
AND ANOTHER IS THE SHEEP IN THE
GOAT AND EVERY TIME THE THEME IS
00:47:08.39\00:47:13.09
THE SAME IN ALL THIS BUILT
OF MATTHEW 24 WHICH TALKS ABOUT
00:47:13.09\00:47:17.73
WHAT WE'RE REALLY COUNT AT
THE END OF TIME WHEN ALL THESE
00:47:17.73\00:47:19.43
THINGS HAPPEN AND WE THINK WHAT
WILL COUNT LOOK WHAT'S HAPPENING
00:47:19.43\00:47:24.31
IN THE FORM OF THIS PROPHECY
BUT THAT IS A REVELATION OVER
00:47:24.31\00:47:28.74
MATTHEW 25 AND WHAT
THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT.
00:47:28.74\00:47:32.15
>> YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT WHAT
HIGHLIGHTED THE SERVANT THAT
00:47:32.15\00:47:37.75
DIDN'T USE HIS TALENT BUT JESUS
ALSO SAID HE WAS LAZY AND SO YOU
00:47:37.75\00:47:42.06
ARE SAYING SOME MEN MIGHT BE
GOING LIKE THAT SOUND LIKE TOO
00:47:42.06\00:47:44.36
MUCH WORK BUT
MARRIAGE IS AN INVESTMENT.
00:47:44.36\00:47:48.63
YOU ARE MAKING AN INVESTMENT AND
IS WORK THAT LAZINESS CAN COST
00:47:48.63\00:48:03.41
YOU. >> WHEN YOU
ASKED WHAT SEPARATES
00:48:03.41\00:48:05.18
THE SHEEP AND THE GOAT WOULD
HAVE NEVER THOUGHT TO SAY THIS
00:48:05.18\00:48:08.98
BUT WHAT SEPARATES THE SHEEP AND
THE GOATS IS JESUS TELLING THEM
00:48:08.98\00:48:14.26
I WAS HUNGRY GAVE ME FOOD I WAS
THIRSTY GAVE ME DRINK AND A SO
00:48:14.26\00:48:19.03
THAT SHE ARE THE ONES WHO
ARE HELPING TO TAKE CARE OF THE
00:48:19.03\00:48:23.93
OTHER. >> IN RELATIONSHIP.
00:48:23.93\00:48:26.13
>> AND THE GOATS
ARE WHO ARE THE TAKERS.
00:48:26.13\00:48:30.97
>> THE LEECHES. >>
THEY ARE SUCKING UP ALL THE
00:48:30.97\00:48:35.71
SPIRIT. THEY ARE NOT GIVERS.
00:48:35.71\00:48:39.55
>> WHEN I THINK JESUS COMES
TO THEM AND THEY SAY YOU ARE
00:48:39.55\00:48:42.25
BLESSED BECAUSE YOU DID THESE
THINGS AND THEY ARE LIKE WHEN
00:48:42.25\00:48:44.52
DID WE DO THEM BECAUSE
THAT'S JUST HOW THEY DID A LIFE.
00:48:44.52\00:48:48.32
GET WHO THEY WERE IN THEIR
RELATIONSHIPS IT'S NOT LIKE OKAY
00:48:48.32\00:48:51.53
IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY AND SO
THIS IS HOW WE DO LIFE I WILL
00:48:51.53\00:48:56.03
CONSISTENTLY MINISTER TO THE
PEOPLE WHO I DRAW CLOSE TO YOU
00:48:56.03\00:48:58.73
AND SO I THINK THAT JESUS IS
ASKING OF US TO DRAW CLOSE TO
00:48:58.73\00:49:03.07
EACH THOSE WHO FULFILL
JESUS' PRAYER WHAT AN INCREDIBLE
00:49:03.07\00:49:08.38
OPPORTUNITY WE HAVE ACTUALLY TO
ANSWERS JESUS PRAYER FOR UNITY.
00:49:08.38\00:49:12.38
WERE ALWAYS ASKING HIM TO ANSWER
OUR PRAYERS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
00:49:12.38\00:49:15.58
WE HAVE AN OPPORTUNITY TO ANSWER
HIS PRAYER THAT WE WOULD BE ONE
00:49:15.58\00:49:19.69
AND HOW IS THAT ACCOMPLISHED?
IF I AM DAILY CONSISTENTLY
00:49:19.69\00:49:24.76
MINISTERING TO THE NEED OF MY
FELLOW MAN AND DRAWING CLOSE TO
00:49:24.76\00:49:26.09
THEM AS I SEE -- TO THEM AS
I SIT THOSE NEEDS THAT'S HOW DO
00:49:26.09\00:49:33.50
LIFE. I
MINISTER TO PEOPLE AND AN
00:49:33.50\00:49:37.34
OUTWARD FACING IN MY
RELATIONSHIP WITH MY HUSBAND,
00:49:37.34\00:49:40.01
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT ME MYSELF
I AND MY NEEDS AND IF HE IS
00:49:40.01\00:49:44.55
OUTWARD FACING IT'S NOT JUST
ABOUT HIMSELF AND HIS NEEDS THAT
00:49:44.55\00:49:47.58
WE HAVE A BEAUTIFUL INTERCHANGE
AND THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT WE
00:49:47.58\00:49:49.95
DON'T ADDRESS OUR NEEDS
BUT YOU SEE WHAT I'M SAYING.
00:49:49.95\00:49:53.52
>> YOU ARE TRYING TO IMPROVE EAR
NEEDS TO ME THAT'S WHAT I SAY.
00:49:53.52\00:49:59.53
THAT TO BEING HEALTHY. >>
AND THIS IS NOT NATURAL, THIS
00:49:59.53\00:50:04.07
IS NOT WHAT WE TENDED TOWARD
NATURALLY AS HUMAN BEINGS WE ARE
00:50:04.07\00:50:08.10
BROKE AND WE ARE FOLLOWING WERE
DYSFUNCTIONAL AND SO WE HAVE
00:50:08.10\00:50:11.07
BEEN MARRIED FOR 32 YEARS
WE JUST CELEBRATED OUR 32nd
00:50:11.07\00:50:15.01
WEDDING ANNIVERSARY AND WE HAD
DONE PROGRAMS HERE ARE THREE ABN
00:50:15.01\00:50:18.88
ON RELATIONSHIPS AMIRA GO AND
SO YOU KNOW A LITTLE BIT OF OUR
00:50:18.88\00:50:21.95
JOURNEY THAT WE HAVE GONE
THROUGH AND IT IS NOT NATURAL
00:50:21.95\00:50:25.32
FOR US TO FORGIVE AND RECONCILE
AND TALK AND GIVE-AND-TAKE AND
00:50:25.32\00:50:30.39
SOMETIMES AGAIN GET INTO A
MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP JUST LIKE
00:50:30.39\00:50:32.56
WE GET INTO A WORKING
RELATIONSHIP WHAT CAN I GET OUT
00:50:32.56\00:50:35.90
OF THIS AND HOW LITTLE CAN I
GIVE AND HOW MUCH CAN I GET I
00:50:35.90\00:50:40.54
CANNOT WAIT UNTIL I RETIRE,
I CANNOT WAIT BUT CHRISTIAN
00:50:40.54\00:50:44.31
MINISTRY IS COMPLETELY JUST
WORKING AND GIVING AND WHAT DOES
00:50:44.31\00:50:52.75
IT LOOK LIKE TO STOP DOING
THAT. >> IT LOOKS LIKE LIFE.
00:50:52.75\00:50:57.35
THAT'S THE WAY WERE BUILT AS
CHRISTIANS THAT'S WHY CHRIST WAS
00:50:57.35\00:51:01.09
BUILT SO WENT BY WIFE SAYS
THEY'RE JUST DOING WHAT THEY DO
00:51:01.09\00:51:03.69
YOU THAT'S WHAT THEY DO IT'S NOT
LIKE THEY'RE MAKING A SPECIAL
00:51:03.69\00:51:07.83
SIGNIFICANT EFFORT BUT AT TIMES
WE SURRENDERS LIKE GIVING TO GOD
00:51:07.83\00:51:15.50
WHATEVER IT IS THAT IS CAUSING
THIS AND THEN IF WE DO THAT A
00:51:15.50\00:51:19.24
LOT OF TIMES ARE GETTING THE
WRONG AREA AND WERE FOCUSING ON
00:51:19.24\00:51:22.28
WHAT WE NEED TO DO WE NEED
TO FOCUS ON THE SURRENDER TO GOD
00:51:22.28\00:51:24.88
AND IF WE DO THAT THEN THE FRUIT
COMES OUT AND THEN WE SEE THE
00:51:24.88\00:51:30.32
RESULT. AS YOU
SAID OVER AND OVER AGAIN
00:51:30.32\00:51:33.72
WE ARE SURRENDERING INTO
OUR COVENANT KEEPING GOD.
00:51:33.72\00:51:36.73
HE'S THE ONE KEEPING THE
COVENANT HE'S THE ONE DOING THE
00:51:36.73\00:51:38.96
WORK ON US HE'S THE
ONE WORKING THIS OUT.
00:51:38.96\00:51:42.10
OUR JOB IS TO I ASKED GOD FOR
A NEW DEFINITION TO SURRENDER
00:51:42.10\00:51:48.64
BECAUSE SO MANY PEOPLE DON'T
UNDERSTAND WHAT SURRENDER IS AND
00:51:48.64\00:51:51.84
I TRIED FOR YEARS TO TELL
HIM WHAT IT WAS AND IT DID NOT
00:51:51.84\00:51:55.01
REALLY REGISTER. AND
SO GOD GAVE ME THREE STEPS
00:51:55.01\00:51:59.25
NUMBER ONE, WE HAVE TO KNOW GOD.
TO SURRENDER YOU HAVE TO TELL
00:51:59.25\00:52:04.75
HIM. YOU HAVE TO
KNOW HIM AS A GOD OF
00:52:04.75\00:52:06.92
LOVE BUT ALSO NUMBER
TWO IT IS STOP AND SUBMIT.
00:52:06.92\00:52:12.89
STOP RESISTING
HIS LOVE AND SUBMIT.
00:52:12.89\00:52:17.13
YOU NEED TO LINE UP
UNDER THE AUTHORITY OF GOD.
00:52:17.13\00:52:23.27
AND THE THIRD STEP IS A YIELD TO
THE LEADING OF THE HOLY SPIRIT
00:52:23.27\00:52:30.55
SURRENDER IS NOT DIFFICULT.
IF WE FOLLOW THE SPIRIT HE WILL
00:52:30.55\00:52:37.29
WORK INTO GOD'S GOOD PLEASURE
BUT QUICKLY BECAUSE WE ONLY HAVE
00:52:37.29\00:52:41.26
A FEW MINUTES LEFT, LET ME ASK
YOU THIS QUESTION, IT YOU ARE
00:52:41.26\00:52:48.06
READING THESE BOOKS YOU HAVE
A LIST HERE THAT WE HAVE TALKED
00:52:48.06\00:52:51.50
ABOUT BUT DO YOU SIT
DOWN AND READ THEM TOGETHER?
00:52:51.50\00:52:56.04
SOMEONE OUT HERE IS GOING ON I
WANT MY MARRIAGE TO GO I WANT TO
00:52:56.04\00:53:02.58
MAKE THE INVESTMENT BUT HOW DO
YOU COME TO THIS DO SIT DOWN AND
00:53:02.58\00:53:04.68
READ TO THE CHAPTER
TOGETHER? DO YOU READ APART?
00:53:04.68\00:53:08.08
WHAT YOU DO? >> TO
ME I NEED MY OWN COPY I
00:53:08.08\00:53:12.12
HAVE TO MARKET UP AND WRITE AND
SO IT WORKS FOR US MOST OF THE
00:53:12.12\00:53:14.99
TIME IS THAT SHE GETS A COPY AND
I GET A COPY BUT I DON'T KNOW
00:53:14.99\00:53:18.46
HOW MANY WE HAVE READ TOGETHER
BUT I THINK MOST OF THE TIME
00:53:18.46\00:53:22.00
IT'S MY COPY IN HER COPY AND
OR LIKE WE HAD ONE BOOK AT TIMES
00:53:22.00\00:53:27.54
THAT I'M READING AND I'M SHARING
WITH HER AND SHE HAS A BOOK THAT
00:53:27.54\00:53:29.94
SHE SHARED WITH ME BUT IT
DEPENDS UPON THE COUPLE AND WHAT
00:53:29.94\00:53:33.74
WORKS. >> BUT
WHAT I'M SAYING IS EVEN
00:53:33.74\00:53:34.94
IF YOU HAVE YOUR OWN COPY DO
SIT DOWN AND CHAPTER BY CHAPTER
00:53:34.94\00:53:38.21
TOGETHER OR DO YOU JUST READ
IT SEPARATELY AND COME TOGETHER.
00:53:38.21\00:53:41.18
>> THERE'S A BOOK RIGHT NOW THAT
WE READ TOGETHER AND WE DON'T
00:53:41.18\00:53:43.59
SEE IT EVERY NIGHT BUT BEFORE
YOU GET THE BETTER WERE LIKE
00:53:43.59\00:53:46.89
OKAY LET'S READ A STORY AND IT'S
ONE BOOK AT SOMEONE SAID TO US
00:53:46.89\00:53:51.39
AND IT WAS ON LOVE IS A VERB I
THINK IT WAS SOMETHING LIKE THAT
00:53:51.39\00:53:54.96
IT'S A LOVE STORY OF PEOPLE WHO
MAY BE A CHALLENGING CHALLENGING
00:53:54.96\00:53:59.63
EXPERIENCE AND HOW THEY
MANIFESTED MANIFESTED IT GODLY
00:53:59.63\00:54:02.37
QUALITIES THAT CAME OUT OF IT
AND THEY ARE CLOSER AND STRONGER
00:54:02.37\00:54:05.27
AND MORE INTIMATE AND DO THAT
BEFORE YOU GO TO BED WE READ
00:54:05.27\00:54:10.41
THAT CHAPTER AND SOMETIMES WE
DRIVE IN CARS IN CALIFORNIA TO
00:54:10.41\00:54:13.95
OREGON AND WE READ THE
EA OUR BOOK WE DO THAT.
00:54:13.95\00:54:21.12
IT'S NOT FORMAL IN TERMS OF IT'S
ALWAYS ONE WAY BUT WE DO FIND
00:54:21.12\00:54:25.06
WAYS OF READING IT TOGETHER AND
SHARING THOUGHTS AND DISCUSSING
00:54:25.06\00:54:32.40
IT. >>
EVERYBODY WANTS THAT SWEET
00:54:32.40\00:54:37.77
FRUIT. THE FRUIT
IS NOW THAT YOU ARE
00:54:37.77\00:54:39.31
GETTING TO SHARE WHAT
YOU ARE STUDYING WITH OTHERS.
00:54:39.31\00:54:43.08
AND THIS WILL BE
A VERY BLESSED TIME.
00:54:43.08\00:54:47.68
THE SABBATH. BECAUSE
YOU CAN GET TO GO OVER
00:54:47.68\00:54:49.45
SOME OF THE STUFF AND ASK IT.
>> I WANTED TO SHARE WITH THE
00:54:49.45\00:54:58.46
RECEIPT OUTLINED ON THE 23rd
BIBLICAL FUNDAMENTAL BELIEF AND
00:54:58.46\00:55:02.73
THAT'S WERE GOING THROUGH WE
WILL SHARE THE BELIEF THAT SHE
00:55:02.73\00:55:04.50
SAID SO DO YOU WANT ME THERE?
AND I SAID NOPE I WANT YOU TO
00:55:04.50\00:55:08.64
FILL IN I WANT YOU TO CONNECT
THE DOTS I WANT US TO TALK ABOUT
00:55:08.64\00:55:12.74
SOME OF THE STUFF SO WE CAN
SHARE THE VERSUS AND THEN PUT.
00:55:12.74\00:55:18.88
>> QUICK WE HAVE ONE
MINUTE QUICK FINAL THOUGHT.
00:55:18.88\00:55:24.89
>> IT SO IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER
THAT GOD IS AUTHOR OF MARRIAGE
00:55:24.89\00:55:27.76
AND THAT WHEN WE ARE LOOKING FOR
RELATIONSHIPS AND WE ARE LOOKING
00:55:27.76\00:55:31.29
TO GROW AND IMPROVE THEM THAT WE
TURN TO HIM HE HAS EVERYTHING WE
00:55:31.29\00:55:34.93
NEED TO MAKE IT THE BEAUTIFUL
THING THAT HE DESIGNED FOR IT TO
00:55:34.93\00:55:41.90
BE. >> I WAS
THINKING ABOUT JOSEPH
00:55:41.90\00:55:44.07
WHO WENT THROUGH SOME TRAUMA
JUST AS A LOT OF US HAVE DONE
00:55:44.07\00:55:51.08
OUR LIVES WITH DYSFUNCTIONAL
FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS BUT BEFORE
00:55:51.08\00:55:54.85
HIS BROTHERS CAME BACK INTO HIS
PRESIDENCY HE FORGAVE THEM AND
00:55:54.85\00:55:58.29
SO I DON'T THINK THINK
FORGIVENESS AND WORK INTO OUR
00:55:58.29\00:56:01.06
PAST OUR
DIFFICULTIES IS INCUMBENT ON THE
00:56:01.06\00:56:06.90
INTERRELATIONSHIP
OF THE OTHER PERSON.
00:56:06.90\00:56:08.73
WHAT I'M SAYING IS THAT GOD CAN
HEAL US AND CAUSE US TO FORGIVE
00:56:08.73\00:56:13.50
PEOPLE EVEN IF THEY'RE NOT IN
OUR PRESENCE THAT DOESN'T MEAN
00:56:13.50\00:56:16.50
WE DON'T TEST THAT RELATIONSHIP.
JOSEPH TESTED HIS BROTHERS BUT
00:56:16.50\00:56:19.91
WE DO NEED THIS FORGIVE US IN
THIS RECONCILIATION THAT COMES
00:56:19.91\00:56:23.78
DIRECTLY FROM GOD TO THE PEOPLE
EVEN IF THEY ARE NOT IN OUR
00:56:23.78\00:56:29.82
SPACE. >> THANK
YOU FROM SHARING FROM
00:56:29.82\00:56:31.69
YOUR HEARTS AND YOUR EXPERIENCE
THE WONDERFUL BOOKS THAT YOU
00:56:31.69\00:56:34.56
READ AND DO REMEMBER FOR YOU
AT HOME, WE ARE CREATED IN GOD'S
00:56:34.56\00:56:39.93
IMAGE, GOD IS LOVE AND HE IS
TRYING, THE HOLY SPIRIT ROMANS
00:56:39.93\00:56:45.27
55 HE POURED HIS LOVE INTO OUR
HEART LIKE A THAT IS WHY WE NEED
00:56:45.27\00:56:52.07
TO SURRENDER AND FOLLOW OUR LORD
AND THEN OUR RELATIONSHIPS WILL
00:56:52.07\00:56:56.71
BE GROWING. OUR
PRAYER FOR YOU IS THAT THE
00:56:56.71\00:56:58.48
GRACE OF THE LORD AND SAVIOR
JESUS CHRIST TO THE LEVEL OF THE
00:56:58.48\00:57:01.32
FATHER AND THE SUN AND THE
HOLY SPIRIT WILL BE WITH YOU.
00:57:01.32\00:57:05.62
>> GOD BLESS YOU.
00:57:05.62\00:57:14.86