Participants: Kenny & Chris Shelton (Host), Greg & Jill Morikone, C.A. & Irma Murray
Series Code: TDYFW
Program Code: TDYFW016013A
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00:01 I want to spend my life
00:07 Mending broken people 00:12 I want to spend my life 00:18 Removing pain 00:24 Lord, let my words 00:30 Heal a heart that hurts 00:34 I want to spend my life 00:40 Mending broken people 00:45 I want to spend my life 00:51 Mending broken people. 01:07 Hello and happy Sabbath, 01:08 and welcome to 3ABN's Family Worship. 01:11 Amen. 01:12 Happy Sabbath to all of you here. 01:14 Around the table, and at the piano, 01:16 and then back of the cameras, 01:17 and happy Sabbath to all of our family at home. 01:21 I'm Chris Shelton, 01:22 This is my husband Pastor Kenny Shelton, 01:24 and I'll just to introduce the rest of our 3ABN family. 01:27 To my left is sister Irma Murray 01:30 and her husband Pastor. CA. Murray. 01:32 That's right. 01:34 And then over to my right is sister Jill 01:36 and her husband Greg Morikone, and at our piano, 01:40 we have a wonderful pianist here, 01:41 this evening and that is E.T. 01:44 Everett, she's been a part of the 3ABN family 01:47 for a long time. 01:49 In fact, she's gonna play a song tonight for us to sing. 01:52 She's never even played it before, 01:54 and I said, "That's okay, E.T., we'll help you with it." 01:56 I mean within just few a seconds, she had it. 01:59 I was telling Jill, 02:00 I can't even imagine doing that, 02:02 but in heaven some day, 02:04 I'm going to be able to do that. 02:06 We're gonna sing, we're gonna hear those angels. 02:08 Amen. 02:10 You know, our problem was 02:11 we just wasn't much help to her. 02:12 We're sorry. We really weren't a bit. 02:14 We're just not professional but we just sing with notes, 02:15 sometimes they're just not there. 02:17 But, you know, how, somehow she found them on the piano, 02:19 so we're thankful for that kind of ear and talent, 02:21 I'm willing to work with, I'm a beginner so. 02:24 We're not professionals 02:25 but we do like to do make a joyful noise. 02:27 And I hope that you'll sing with us, 02:29 the topic for our study tonight 02:31 after our music is going to be Making a Happy Home. 02:34 So I hope you'll stay tuned and sing along with us. 02:37 We're gonna start out by a song that is entitled, 02:40 "Let's talk about Jesus." 02:42 Oh, mercy. 02:49 Let's talk about Jesus, the King of kings 02:54 is He The Lord of lords supreme, 02:58 through all eternity. 03:02 The great I Am, the Way, the Truth, the Life, 03:06 the Door Let's talk about Jesus more and more 03:12 O my loving brother, when the world's on fire 03:19 Don't you want God's bosom to be your pillow? 03:25 O hide me over, 03:27 In the Rock of Ages Rock of Ages, 03:34 cleft for me 03:38 Let's talk about Jesus, 03:40 the King of kings is He The Lord of lords supreme, 03:46 through all eternity The great I Am, 03:50 the Way, the Truth, the Life, the Door 03:55 Let's talk about Jesus more and more 04:00 O my loving sister, when the world's on fire 04:06 Don't you want God's bosom to be your pillow? 04:12 O hide me over, 04:15 In the Rock of Ages 04:18 Rock of Ages, cleft for me 04:25 Hallelujah, praise the Lord. 04:27 Let's talk about Jesus. 04:29 Oh, let's do. Amen. 04:30 I mean, what a better song, the King of kings, 04:33 the Lord of lords, the truth, the life, the door. 04:37 No one can enter in, expect through Christ. 04:39 When you're talking about the home and the family, 04:42 it is about Jesus. 04:44 So that's why we're gonna talk about 04:45 and we're gonna sing about him because, 04:47 there is no happiness in home without Jesus. 04:51 People could just, they say there is. 04:53 I can tell you, I can prove differently. 04:55 And it proved difference probably 04:57 some of our lives before, 04:58 so I'm still thankful that we can sing about him 05:00 and talk about him and have that blessed hope. 05:02 And I'm thankful too, because there is a fire coming 05:06 and bothers and sisters, we need to be under His wings. 05:09 That's right. 05:10 The next song we're going to sing is, 05:12 "I've got Peace like a River." 05:15 I've got Peace like a River. 05:16 If you have Jesus. That's right. 05:19 I've got peace like a river I've got peace like a river 05:27 I've got peace like a river in my soul 05:33 I've got peace like a river I've got peace like a river 05:39 I've got peace like a river in my soul 05:46 I've got love like an ocean I've got love like an ocean 05:52 I've got love like an ocean in my soul 05:58 I've got love like an ocean I've got love like an ocean 06:04 I've got love like an ocean in my soul 06:10 I've got joy like a fountain I've got joy like a fountain 06:16 I've got joy like a fountain in my soul 06:22 I've got joy like a fountain, 06:25 I've got joy like a fountain 06:28 I've got joy like a fountain in my soul 06:35 Praise the Lord. Amen. 06:36 That's a great song. 06:38 You know, it reminds me 06:39 when I was a kid going to camp meeting. 06:40 I saw Pastor C.A., doing a motion for the ocean. 06:42 I think of the joy... 06:44 Yes. Amen. 06:45 It's a good song though. It is. 06:47 A lot of message to it. 06:48 And you know, we need the peace, 06:49 the love, and the joy 06:51 in our hearts and in our family. 06:54 We're going to start talking about, 06:56 Making a Happy Home, 06:58 and without that love, joy, and peace, 07:02 you can have all knowledge, 07:03 all wisdom and it means nothing. 07:05 It's means absolutely nothing, 07:07 so we're gonna talk a little bit about it, 07:09 we might step on our own toes... 07:11 maybe some other toes. 07:13 I know when I was... 07:15 I was preparing personally, it just reminded me at times, 07:18 because at first I thought, "Oh, wow, this is great." 07:20 And then I saw, 07:22 all the spots where I had failed. 07:25 Yes. 07:26 She came down the steps, and she said, 07:28 "Honey, oh, why wouldn't they study right here, 07:31 I just failed so miserably." 07:34 And I said, "You know what honey? 07:35 As human beings we look back, 07:37 in every area of my life I failed, 07:40 I'm not lived up." 07:41 You know by the grace of God we're to live up, but we look, 07:43 we find shortcomings and failure 07:46 and we can look back later and say, 07:47 "You know what? I'd change if I had the opportunity." 07:49 But sometime we don't have that opportunity. 07:51 And so there's many out there 07:53 that have no worship service night, 07:54 they fail miserably in a lot of areas, 07:56 they're crying because their children are not in church. 07:59 They're crying maybe they've passed away, 08:00 something bad has happened 08:01 and they wish they could start over and do it again. 08:05 Well the good news is, we can't change the past, 08:08 but we can redeem at the present. 08:10 Amen. 08:12 I was just gonna say that because, you know, 08:13 the devil likes to bring up the past 08:15 and actually bring tremendous discouragement. 08:16 And you're right, we can't change the past. 08:18 But, boy, we've got today. 08:20 and what we can do with God's... 08:21 Bible said what, redeem, redeem the time. 08:24 I got excited about that. 08:25 Redeem the time because I need it. 08:27 The devil and I wrote this article some time ago... 08:30 "The Lord does not judge us on the snapshot, 08:33 he judges on the video." 08:34 So, at any point in your life and God would have judge you 08:37 on that point in your life, you might be in hot water. 08:40 You know, you might be in trouble. 08:42 But he looks at the video, 08:43 He looks at the direction of your life, 08:44 because all of us hopefully can look back and say, 08:47 "Yeah, I'm not where I need to be 08:49 but I'm a whole lot better than I was." 08:51 You know, and it's through the grace of God, 08:53 that is looking at the trajectory of my life, 08:55 not just at one point because had he seen me 20 years ago, 08:58 Lord, may have said, "Well, you know, I can't." 09:01 But now, I've made a couple of improvements, 09:03 you know, I've been a recipient of His grace. 09:05 Amen. So God is merciful to us. 09:07 Amen. Amen. 09:08 And a lot better to us than we are to ourselves into 09:10 and we are to each other 09:12 sometimes in our homes and in our marriage. 09:14 You reminded me of something that I read, 09:16 it says same principle. 09:17 It's not by our occasionally good deeds or misdeeds... 09:20 Yes. 09:21 The way for heaven is prepared, but it's the overall, 09:23 he said project it's our overall life. 09:25 It's our upward tendencies. 09:27 Yes, yes. 09:28 So as long as we're striving by the grace of God 09:30 upward constantly climbing and moving forward, 09:32 so we want to encourage folks at home, 09:34 don't give up, this what this study is all about 09:36 that we should have prayer shouldn't we, sweaty? 09:38 Absolutely, I was just gonna ask you, 09:39 if you folks at home with... 09:41 join with us in prayer, 09:43 Pastor Kenny is going to lead us in prayer 09:44 and then after prayer, quickly get your Bibles, 09:46 you're gonna need your Bibles tonight. 09:48 Amen. Let's pray. 09:50 Loving Father in heaven, 09:51 we thank You for the privilege that we have our prayer. 09:54 We thank You for the beginning of the Sabbath. 09:55 We thank You in many homes and many lives 09:57 that we've looked within anticipation 09:59 that the Sabbath hours, 10:01 we realize as the sun goes down, 10:02 we put away all of our tools and all those things 10:05 that maybe occupied us during the week 10:08 but now we can lay all those things aside 10:10 with a perfect heart and mind because you've said, 10:12 no work on this day. 10:13 Amen. 10:14 And that we can spend this time fellowshipping, 10:16 and I know you've looked down at me 10:17 and you said, "Oh, he needs this time." 10:19 I thank You for that 10:21 and I know many, many years of construction, 10:22 I look with anticipation as Friday evening 10:25 to put the saw down, not have to pick it up, 10:27 not worry about what's going to take place, 10:29 not worry about fixing something 10:30 because I need to go to the great creator and redeemer, 10:33 He's gonna fix me. 10:34 Bless now we pray those who are viewing, 10:36 those who would listen, 10:38 we praise you're sitting around as it were the families. 10:41 Maybe the fireplace, it may just be in the circle, 10:43 may just be gathered together in the living room, 10:45 but Lord, I pray that each one now 10:46 on bended knee where you can. 10:48 We lift our voices today and say, 10:50 Lord please speak we need to hear 10:51 Your precious sweet voice. 10:53 We need to realize the importance and so oft. 10:55 Oh, we've missed some of these things up, 10:57 but You've always impressed my heart and mind. 11:00 Kenny, you may have messed these things up, 11:01 but you need... you still tell the truth. 11:03 You may come back, and embrace a little nod on your head 11:05 but you still tell the way that it is. 11:07 So I thank you for that, bless now we pray, 11:09 in the discussion, in the group, and the passages 11:11 that we read, and the unction of the Holy Spirit, 11:13 we may live above and breathe, breathe, 11:17 breathe the air of heaven. 11:18 I'm gonna thank You for this time together 11:19 and for the Sabbath hours are meant to be, 11:21 we claim and we thank you in Jesus' name 11:24 we thank You for every precious soul in Jesus' name. 11:26 Amen. Amen 11:28 Amen. Amen. 11:29 I hope you are getting your Bibles together now, 11:31 and we're going to maybe even start a little backwards. 11:34 We may not stay that way, 11:35 but we're gonna start by saying... 11:36 Well... 11:38 Look at Proverbs 15:17. 11:41 So get your Bibles or your electronic Bible, 11:43 I'm gonna use my electronic Bible, 11:45 and we're gonna look up Proverbs 15: 17. 11:49 Proverbs 15:17. 11:51 This is an interesting, interesting verse here, 11:55 and it says a lot. 11:56 It does say a lot, it truly does. 11:58 Yes, it does. 11:59 And I think Brother Greg has that verse already, 12:01 so Brother Greg, would you read that for us? 12:03 Proverbs 15:17 says 12:05 and this is from the King James Version, 12:07 it says, "Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, 12:11 than a stalled ox and hatred there in." 12:14 Okay, now the question for that verse. 12:18 The question is one secret of a happy home. 12:23 One secret of a happy home. 12:24 Amen. Love. 12:26 Okay. Beautiful. 12:27 Because to me, if you have, 12:29 you can have the outward trappings of a home, right? 12:32 You could have a marriage, you could have kids, 12:34 you could have outward trappings of success, 12:36 you could have a good home, and a good job, 12:38 and car, and all of that stuff. 12:40 That means nothing, 12:41 if we don't have love in the home. 12:43 Because and it's not self-love 12:46 or Satan's type of prideful selfish love. 12:49 It's the principle of self-sacrificing love. 12:52 Remember when Jesus walked this earth, 12:54 He lived to bless others in His whole life, 12:58 from the cradle to the cross 12:59 was about service to other people. 13:02 Self sacrificing love, 13:04 so to me this love portrait here is not just love 13:07 as we would say the word 13:09 but, it's self sacrificing love. 13:11 What is best for my husband or my children, 13:13 or not thinking of self but of someone else. 13:16 Amen. That's beautiful. 13:18 I think it's interesting. 13:21 Sociologists tell us that those who try marriage 13:26 by living together. 13:29 The rate of divorce 13:30 once they do get married or separation is, 13:33 is exceeds those who just get married, 13:36 so the secret to staying together 13:39 can't be trial and error. 13:41 It can't be let me dip my toes in the water 13:43 and see I like this. 13:45 I think the thing that Jill touched on 13:47 even more than love is or as much as love, 13:50 I won't say more than love is sacrifice. 13:52 That marriage shows you and children do it too, 13:56 that ain't all about you. 13:59 If we're gonna stay together, somebody's got to yield, 14:01 somebody's got to sacrifice. 14:02 Love is got to be the, 14:04 the pan in which the cake is baked. 14:07 But somebody's got to sacrifice, 14:08 somebody's got to say, "I'm sorry." 14:10 Yes. And mean it. 14:11 And the truth is, no matter how long you date, 14:15 you never really know everything. 14:17 That's true. Till you say, I did... 14:19 Tell it all, come on that's right. 14:20 Then when you do... 14:22 Then you begin learning. Yeah, you keep on doing. 14:24 And that's how you begin to learn. 14:26 And that's when your love got to, 14:28 got to kick in on the days when you get up, 14:30 and your breath is not good, or you know, 14:34 the hair is not combed and now we in this thing. 14:37 You know, we're here we are, you know, 14:38 and we got to love each other through this, 14:40 or when one person gets sick or something changes, 14:43 I used to be able to get up and cook for you, 14:45 I can't do that now. 14:47 You gonna love me through this. 14:48 Or I remember and I will say this, 14:51 when my mom got breast cancer. 14:54 And I heard my dad going and just talk with her, 14:57 because she was feeling less than whole, 14:59 you know, she felt, she felt it keenly. 15:02 And my dad was not a great orator. 15:05 You know, he wasn't Shakespearean, 15:07 he just went in and just assured her, 15:09 "It's all right. Everything is gonna be okay." 15:12 And that's what love, that's what love does. 15:14 Because you know, 15:15 you've got to love when they're, 15:17 when they're 21 15:18 and, and, and their weight matches their age. 15:22 And 20 years later have to wait to match the age, 15:24 you still got to love them. 15:26 You're starting a challenge. 15:27 He's got a challenge to set you right here. 15:29 All right. 15:31 So, so, so, love and I think just one is so important 15:34 that it's got to see you through, 15:36 you know, it's got to put legs on the ground. 15:37 'cause love is gonna change, nobody's gonna be tall, 15:39 and thin, and shapely, and everything 15:41 and whatever stuff drops, 15:42 and sags, and shifts, and moves, 15:44 and, you know, kind of thing in, 15:45 you still got to love, 15:47 you got to sacrifice. 15:48 I'd like to look at that verses a little bit more 15:50 and talk about what that verse is actually saying, 15:53 it says, "Better is a dinner of herbs where love is..." 15:58 Does that mean herbs are so good for us, 16:00 or we shouldn't be having dinners of herbs. 16:02 Well not for food. 16:03 "Than a stalled ox and hatred with in." 16:06 So what is it, what is saying here? 16:09 Jill alluded to it. 16:11 My Bible, here it says, 16:13 "The dinner of herbs is the sparse, a simple diet." 16:16 So it would be something 16:17 maybe we don't have a lot of money 16:19 and we can't afford some lavish spread or maid to cook for us, 16:23 so, you know that type of things... 16:24 Because the stalled ox represents finances, 16:28 money you can obtain that, 16:30 and you know sometimes herbs are less expensive, 16:33 you can grow them on your own. 16:34 Does that mean that our bodies don't need them 16:36 by any form or fashion. 16:38 But it's just saying, 16:40 you can have just a little bit of money, 16:41 be poor, be struggling, 16:43 but a home is so much better with the love is. 16:45 That right. 16:46 Than when you have a lot of means, 16:48 finances, a beautiful home. 16:51 You know, it could be like walking into a museum. 16:54 But when if there is hatred that abounds, 16:56 it's not a home. 16:58 My translation says the fatted calf 17:00 which is a term that we hear. 17:01 You know, that's the lavish table. 17:03 Herbs are really for seasoning food. 17:06 But if that's all you got to eat. 17:08 You know, you're in a pretty rough strait. 17:10 But it's better to be in that rough strait with Jesus 17:12 and love than to have a table where full of food, 17:16 I'm sitting at one end, 17:17 and you're down at the other end, 17:18 you know, the butler is in the middle 17:20 carrying recipes back and forth, 17:21 but there is no love in home. 17:22 That's right. 17:24 Isn't our love for fellow man 17:27 really tells of our love for God, isn't it? 17:30 I mean that's our neighbor, that's everybody 17:33 that it really tells how much we love God 17:36 is the way we deal with our, our fellow man. 17:39 So sometime look how we deal with our fellow man, 17:41 or our neighbor, or we say, he's not our neighbor 17:44 or we don't like him now, because... 17:46 We need to be very careful 17:47 on these two writing all the law in the testament, 17:50 duty to God and then our duty to our fellow man. 17:53 Must be base has been mentioned here on love, true love. 17:57 And I think Pastor. 17:58 Kenny, you know, not only are we to love the neighbors, 18:01 the strangers, whatever the hardest person to love 18:04 is the person closest. 18:05 That's exactly right. 18:07 Because Greg knows more than anybody my faults. 18:10 And she knows my of course. 18:11 The things you struggle with whatever, 18:13 and so whoever you are the closest with, 18:16 that would be where we need to express the love the most. 18:19 And sometimes we don't want to do that, 18:20 you know, it's easy to love everyone else, 18:22 when you go to church. 18:23 And then in home it's like, 18:25 "Okay, I'll be a different person." 18:26 But no, God calls us to that at home first, 18:30 and then that extends to outside the home. 18:32 Very good. 18:34 I think when our home is happy and how the love of God, 18:39 it's so much easier to deal with the outside also. 18:42 Oh, absolutely. 18:43 When you see families 18:47 that have so much struggle in their home 18:51 and then just see them out and they can't hide it, 18:55 you can see that there is trouble. 18:57 But when the law of God isn't in the home, 18:59 and you have a happiness, 19:02 not that we never gonna have 19:05 even an argument 19:07 between the husband 19:09 so or even with the children sometimes. 19:13 The love of God overrides sort of then. 19:16 And so it's done, and he is taking care of it, 19:19 and then we continue on loving each other 19:22 and caring for each other. 19:25 And the beautiful thing is the closer we draw to God, 19:29 the less frequency and hopefully 19:31 we get to the point where this dissention 19:34 does not even raise its ugly head anymore. 19:37 And I wanted 19:38 because, we've got actually 18 questions 19:41 but we might get through three. 19:46 That's exactly right. 19:48 Something came to my mind when Jill was speaking, 19:51 she talked about that Greg knew all her faults and vice versa. 19:55 And I want to share a quote to you, 19:57 because most likely we won't even get down that far. 20:01 And this quote is from Adventist home page 177, 20:05 I'll just read once sentence, it says. 20:07 "The heart of the wife should be the grave 20:13 for the faults of the husband, 20:15 and the heart of the husband 20:18 the grave for his wife's fault." 20:20 What does that mean? 20:21 It means that we're not to go out, 20:23 they're buried, they're done. 20:25 You're not to go out, I'm not to go to sister Irma, 20:27 and say, "Oh, sister Irma, 20:29 you won't believe what Pastor Kenny did, 20:31 you just won't believe it." 20:33 It's buried. That's right. 20:34 With no power of resurrection. We deal. 20:36 Exactly we deal, between us and God alone. 20:40 Indeed, yeah. Amen. 20:42 That is powerful. It is powerful. 20:44 I mean the Bible says, was it Mark? 20:47 Was it chapter 3, talks about a verse 25, 20:51 "A house divided against itself cannot stand." 20:54 That's right. 20:55 And those divided means a house, 20:58 he's talking about really a family the word, 21:01 I think you can agree is, is it's a family, 21:03 it's a family circle 21:06 that it cannot stay together, you see. 21:09 If our minds and stuff, if one wants to, 21:11 you know, go do this, one wants to do that, 21:12 we need to be together, we need to be in unity, 21:15 divided a family that even, that even means relatives. 21:17 That's right. 21:19 Relatives and family 21:21 if you're not coming to agreement, 21:22 unless two agree how can we walk together. 21:24 There's gonna be division somewhere along the line, 21:27 but we need to make sure 21:28 that we're doing what God would have us in His word 21:30 and give it certainly an effort and to love. 21:31 Amen. 21:33 You know, I think also a case, you know because we're all, 21:34 I mean Jill and I are not perfect. 21:36 So when there are issues, we'll say fault, 21:38 we're using the word faults 21:40 would be to actually, like you're saying, 21:42 you know, it's not good to talk to other people about them. 21:43 But then, to actually not just bury them, 21:46 actually work on them, you know. 21:47 Oh, yes. 21:48 You know, this is something I'm really struggling with. 21:50 Yes. Jill, please help me in this. 21:52 You know, next time you see me 21:53 doing whatever that you know are fault of mine. 21:55 You know help me. 21:56 So that's where actually you can improve, 21:58 not necessary just burying the stuff. 22:00 Amongst us between Jill and myself 22:02 but actually work on issues that we can then strengthen so. 22:07 I mean that's really a point where you need to look at 22:10 because if we keep, I'm thinking, 22:13 as I'm growing up in the home, 22:14 as if we keep these things in our self 22:16 and we don't take care of them and talk 'em through 22:18 and find some kind of solution and an answer. 22:20 This is what I expect you baby, 22:21 what you expect of me and let's look it out here. 22:24 A couple of times when I needed, 22:26 I'm gonna call it a good sound shellacking, 22:28 a thumping at home my dad want to give. 22:31 There's a time or two he had grace 22:33 and mercy and he let it go. 22:35 I experienced the same. He buried it. 22:37 Just what you were talking about. 22:38 He kind of buried and let it go and say, 22:40 we're going to let it go this time, 22:41 Kenny, don't do it again. 22:43 Well, about the second or third time I did it, 22:44 I got the shellacking 22:45 and he said, "Now you remember last time, 22:47 you did the same thing last time, 22:50 you should have been, I want to give it." 22:52 I'm just simply saying, it wasn't taken care of. 22:55 And it will come back to get you eventually, 22:56 so I like that sat down talk about them. 22:59 I say to her many times, I'll say. 23:00 "Honey, you made..." 23:02 I'm not saying I'm even right on this but this is how I feel. 23:04 Is this okay? 23:06 This is how I feel inside, 23:07 I want to be based on the word. 23:09 This how I feel, I may not be right about it. 23:10 You're gonna have to tell me that, 23:12 but I'm trying to look at a principle here. 23:13 Yeah, that's good. 23:15 So it's not always, well, I'm right, you're wrong. 23:16 It's I'm not sure that I am, but this is the way I feel 23:18 because I really want. 23:20 You know, I really want her to know 23:22 how I feel and then if it's not right, 23:25 she can help to gauge, and judge, 23:26 and bring me back to where I need to be. 23:30 It's important not hide it what you said, 23:32 because hiding only tries to cover it 23:33 and then when a moment comes, 23:35 we just all jump up and say, well, this is... 23:37 I've been hiding it too long 23:38 and I'm just going to come out with it. 23:40 In a sense that Chris was quite right, 23:41 we may not, we may only get to one or two. 23:43 It's all right. That's okay. 23:45 Because the contrast that is, 23:48 not putting your business in the street. 23:51 There are certain things we need to work out between us. 23:54 Thank you. 23:55 I don't need to say, hey, Pastor Kenny, 23:57 "Do you have any idea?" 24:00 You know, I need to talk to her and bring in Jesus, 24:04 and kind of let it 24:05 unless you're going for professional help. 24:07 Sometimes you need professional help. 24:08 But you don't want to be grabbing 24:10 every Tom, Dick, Harry, anybody with the answer 24:12 like my wife is the worst, 24:13 you know, my husband is the lousiest 24:14 and that kind of thing. 24:16 First of all, it puts no trust in your spouse. 24:18 That's right. That's right. 24:20 And you cannot love what you do not trust. 24:21 It's just you can't, if you lose trust, 24:24 love is going to get burnt up into some kind of way. 24:26 So you've got to find a way to work it out 24:29 between and that's what, 24:30 that's what the love of Christ is all about. 24:33 Love will get you in there, but love also keep you going... 24:36 That's good. And it keep you running. 24:38 'Cause this is more than what we're talking, 24:39 we're sitting with all the family 24:40 and making a happy home. 24:42 This is the making, 24:43 the foundation what everyone's talking about here, 24:46 because there's eventually may be children involved 24:49 and they have ears. 24:51 And they hear, and they look and they listen 24:56 and they pick up things like you. 24:57 Oh, what? 24:58 I look to them and say, 25:00 oh, they picked up those bad things. 25:01 You know something, you might, 25:03 you know quick maybe the temper whatever, 25:04 or they might see you working with, 25:06 their grandson stayed with us 25:07 for a couple of days and he was busy. 25:09 I was out in the barn, 25:10 and he thought he had in my house, 25:12 he had a six or eight bales of hay up high. 25:14 He was climbing up those thing, 25:16 well, basically, he was really destroying what was there 25:18 because he had a little pitchfork, 25:19 he was trying to shoot hay up with strings, 25:22 you know, I had one of those things, I just let him go to. 25:23 He worked. 25:25 He worked and he worked, his little face was just, 25:26 he is five years old, just beet red, 25:28 sweat coming down, this on Sunday I think. 25:31 And he worked and so he come in, right... 25:34 Even if no one was there, I'll be on the yard, 25:36 I'm watching him, I'm watching him play. 25:38 About 5 o'clock in the evening, 25:40 he had his little, little shovel, 25:42 he come walking up toward the house. 25:44 And he had to hear this 25:45 and somebody looked at him, he looked at me 25:47 he said, threw the shovel down, 25:48 he said, "Grandpa, I'm finished, I'm through." 25:54 I'm not sure what all prompted, he is little private out there, 25:56 he just threw it down and looked at me, 25:57 he said, "Grandpa, I'm through, I'm finished." 26:00 He walked into house and he never back. 26:05 He heard somebody say, 26:07 "I'm finished, I'm done, I'm through, 26:09 I don't have anymore do." 26:10 He knew he came to that point, he did, he had it, he said, 26:12 "I've had it, I'm done." 26:14 You know, as everybody is talking, 26:16 we're talking about getting along, 26:17 we're talking about trusting each other, 26:19 and I was looking actually for another quote. 26:21 I just couldn't put my finger on it here 26:23 but it talks about that we need to be drawing closer to God. 26:26 Amen. 26:27 And there's a quote in here, you can think of a large circle 26:30 and there's many, many, many lines 26:33 that are going towards the center. 26:36 So as we're getting closer to Christ 26:38 in the center of that circle, 26:40 we are also all the lines are drawing closer 26:44 to one another. 26:45 So as we're working for Christ, 26:47 as Christ is center of our home, 26:49 we actually become closer to each other. 26:52 And I find that's the same even in our Christian 26:56 walk with those brothers and sisters around us. 26:58 You just have a bond 27:00 that you don't have with other people. 27:02 There's a spirit that connects us. 27:04 And so, then there is trust, there's love, 27:07 and we can pass it on to our children 27:09 and to our neighbors, and those around us. 27:12 Shall we try for question number two? 27:14 Sounds good. 27:15 All right, I'll actually give you 27:17 the question this time first. 27:18 Let's try. Let's go. 27:19 Question number two 27:21 is God acquainted with your life? 27:24 And the text for this one is Psalms 139:2-4. 27:31 Psalms 139:2-4. 27:37 The Bible says, "You know my sitting down and my rising up, 27:41 understand my thought are far off. 27:44 You comprehend my path and my lying down 27:47 and are acquainted with all my ways 27:50 for there is not a word on my tongue, 27:53 for the whole O, Lord, you know it all together." 27:56 Was there any question? 28:01 Is there any question? 28:05 Absolutely, isn't he? 28:07 That's one of my favorite Psalms I think, 28:09 because it just talks about God knowing us inside out. 28:11 Yes, He does. 28:12 You know, He knows who I am. 28:14 He knows what He had in mind for me 28:17 when He created me in my mother's womb. 28:20 He knows where I've been, the places I've fallen. 28:24 And He knows the plan of redemption He has over my life. 28:27 And He knows who I can become in Jesus. 28:31 And so, I think He knows everything. 28:33 Not only the bad, but He knows the good 28:35 and He knows what He wants to work in our hearts. 28:38 That's true. How he wants to change us. 28:40 And I think sometimes in marriage, praise the Lord, 28:43 I don't think we've ever experienced this 28:44 but sometimes people have a tough time. 28:47 You know many, many marriages are struggling 28:51 and you may feel like, nobody understands me. 28:56 Nobody understands where I am, and what I'm going through, 28:59 the Lord Jesus does, 29:01 He know everything about it and He wants to fix it. 29:03 Yes, yes. It's the best part. 29:06 And that's a beautiful part, 29:08 but the key to fixing a marriage, 29:10 the key is that both parties must be willing. 29:15 Both parties must be willing to work. 29:18 I've always said that a marriage is a work. 29:21 It's a work of a lifetime. 29:23 But if you have one party 29:25 that's constantly, constantly, constantly trying to work, 29:29 eventually everything will fall apart. 29:32 It takes two, which is why I believe God so... 29:38 So many times told His people 29:40 don't marry outside of the faith. 29:43 It's hard enough to be married 29:45 when you're both walking in the same faith, 29:48 but when you walk outside, 29:49 then you've already got several strikes, 29:51 you know, against you. 29:53 And so, it takes both parties to work 29:56 and you can try for years, 29:58 you can suffer, it can destroy you 30:00 mentally, physically, 30:01 spiritually as you're struggling. 30:03 But if both parties don't get on board, 30:05 it just will not work. 30:07 So I encourage all of you at home, 30:10 get on board together, 30:12 get on board for your family, 30:13 your children, they are worth it. 30:15 They are worth it, and the beautiful thing is, 30:18 you know, when we read that passage in Psalms 139, 30:21 those three verses. 30:23 There are things that happen in our life, 30:25 happen in the marriages. 30:27 We just mentioned were to be a graveyard. 30:29 Well, if you can't go and talk to somebody about it 30:32 especially us women. 30:34 We like to talk. 30:36 We like to share and if we can't go share with him, 30:39 you know, there's things that we can take 30:41 to our Heavenly Father. 30:43 That's right. That's right. 30:45 And we find healing, we find encouragement, 30:49 we find peace, 30:50 and it may not happen at that moment, 30:52 but give it time through prayer 30:54 and struggling with your Heavenly Father, 30:56 because He knows every situation. 30:59 He knows the hearts. 31:00 He knows every secret sin, every secret anything. 31:03 He already knows it. 31:05 So talk to Him about it, bring it to Him. 31:07 So if you have division. 31:09 If there is division in the family. 31:11 If there is division in the church, 31:14 division of our neighbors, 31:16 I guarantee you there's been a disconnect with Christ. 31:18 That's right. Absolutely. 31:19 You know, and the answer to, 31:21 you know, getting back secret of talking about unity. 31:23 It's not maybe, some, sometime it is, 31:26 but it's not diplomacy. 31:28 It's not manage things differently 31:30 or go here, go there and do it. 31:32 Once again, it always comes back union with Christ. 31:36 It's always, it will always fit, 31:37 it will never change. 31:39 You know what marriage does for you. 31:40 One of the things it does. 31:42 What comes to mind is Galatians 6:4, 31:45 "Let each one examine their own work." 31:49 Marriage provides for you a mirror to look at yourself. 31:53 Now, it is very easy to look at others. 31:55 You know, even your wife well, you know, about you. 31:59 You know, exclamation, exclamation, exclamation, 32:02 but it really... 32:06 But really, the truth is that person is there 32:10 to among other things 32:11 give your mirror to look at yourself. 32:13 You know, God knows you, He is not fool. 32:15 No. 32:17 The person has got to get a little handle on you is you, 32:20 you know, and you got to do it in the light 32:21 of that other person 32:23 who is sharing your life, and in the light of God's love. 32:26 So let... 32:27 Don't just spend all your time 32:28 pointing your finger at somebody else. 32:30 You've got to hook that thing back 32:31 and look at yourself and see your own faults. 32:33 And sometimes the things that you hate the most 32:36 in the person you're living with are 32:38 because you see those things in yourself. 32:40 And when you, when you begin to work with that 32:42 and work with yourself, then healing begins to come... 32:44 You know, as you were talking about pointing fingers. 32:48 I felt it. 32:49 You know, I wanted to reach and rescue. 32:52 And it reminds me of something Steps to Christ, 32:55 I don't have that pulled up, I can't, 32:57 you know quote it exactly but it talks about 32:59 how Christ never ever needlessly wounded. 33:04 Yes. That's right. A sensitive soul. 33:06 And yet, so often, we're wounding... 33:10 each other, our children. 33:12 Yeah. 33:14 I always said, you know, if anybody even growing up, 33:17 if anybody could make me lose my temper, it was my brother. 33:19 And I hated myself for it, 33:21 but it's those that we love the most, 33:24 those that I pray for the most, 33:26 those that know our weaknesses, our strengths 33:28 that sometimes we let that guard down 33:31 and things come out. 33:32 But the good news is it's our trajectory, 33:34 it's, we're going forward, we can change it. 33:36 Yes. 33:38 We can say we are sorry. 33:39 We don't have to stay where we are. 33:41 Why is it? 33:42 Why is it though, the ones that we love, 33:43 maybe somebody get the ones we say love the most 33:46 can upset us the most, and make the old man 33:50 come up out of the grave is supposed to die, 33:51 you know a new man come up, 33:53 come and say things that you really 33:54 should not be saying or even thinking. 33:56 But why is it that the loved ones, 33:58 one we're supposed to love more why? 34:00 Any thoughts on that, why is that they can do it 34:02 and other people can say and do the same thing 34:04 and we kind of smile and pat him on the back and we go on. 34:07 Well, I don't know what Greg would say. 34:09 But I know for me, I think whoever you love the most, 34:11 you let into your heart. 34:13 You know, when you actually love someone, 34:15 you let your guard down 34:17 and you allow them access to the most 34:20 intimate places of your heart, 34:22 as far as you're the most vulnerable. 34:25 And so, when you let that down, it's easier to be hurt. 34:30 Because you let them in, you're open to that, 34:33 I think so anyway, 34:34 I know one thing with Greg and I, this happened 34:38 I think in the first year of our marriage... 34:40 Oh, oh, be careful now. 34:42 You're getting nervous, Greg. 34:44 Are you getting nervous? No, no. 34:46 I think and this was, this was transformational for me 34:51 is that, I think this is a bad thing, 34:55 but I have more of a sensitive spirit. 34:57 It can be a good thing if you're sensitive toward God, 35:00 but if it's easily wounded that can be a bad thing. 35:02 And that's something God wants to work in my heart with 35:05 and so, sometimes Greg would say something, 35:09 and he never meant anything 35:11 but I would take it and think he meant it against me. 35:15 Now, he didn't mean it that way, 35:17 and in the first year of our marriage, 35:18 when we, when I understood, 35:21 everything that comes out of his mouth 35:23 is never intended to hurt me 35:25 in our almost 14 years of marriage, 35:27 he has never purposely done anything to hurt. 35:29 That's beautiful. 35:31 Then if something comes out, 35:32 and I think where did that come from? 35:35 Oh, it wasn't intentional. 35:37 I just know that automatic and instantly that takes, 35:40 it's like a sap, it takes any pain away, 35:43 and I, so I can say, "Hey, did you mean it that way?" 35:45 "Oh, no, of course I didn't." 35:47 Okay. 35:49 You can learn to grow in that trust 35:50 and so for me that was transformational. 35:52 Praise the Lord. That's beautiful. 35:54 That's the communication I believe actually, 35:55 now we're talking about, you got to communicate 35:57 between each other about things, 35:59 "Hey, did you mean to hurt me?" 36:00 "Oh, no, I didn't mean that at all." 36:01 I also think too, that the devil... 36:03 You're talking about the home. 36:05 The devil realizes that a Christian home 36:07 is a powerful witness. 36:08 Oh, absolutely. 36:10 So Satan will come in so the wife that I love, 36:12 you know, I've promised my life to her, 36:14 you're talking about those that are closest, 36:16 maybe our children, we don't have kids, 36:17 but maybe my mom, dad, sister. 36:19 Those that we love the most 36:21 sometimes, sometimes there's issues like you're saying, 36:22 I think Satan wants to come in, and he realizes that. 36:26 And so he tries to come and destroy that cause. 36:28 He knows what buttons people, 36:30 you know, people know what buttons to push, 36:31 and the devil does too. 36:33 So I think you ask why? 36:34 Well, the Satan is there 36:35 because if he can make a mockery of the family, 36:37 he's making a mockery 36:38 of a whole lot of other things too. 36:40 Because, it was, I know this is some your questions here 36:41 but it was instituted in the Garden of Eden. 36:42 That's right. 36:44 You know, the family Adam and Eve. 36:45 And so it's a God ordained union 36:47 and the family and the home. 36:49 One of the things he's talking about here 36:50 most of you probably at least in the home 36:52 were you raised and people that love Jesus... 36:53 True. 36:54 Is that, my mother even until she passed away. 36:58 She would come some time 37:00 and, and of course she came the church 37:01 the last ten years or so 12 years of life. 37:03 So being, being a son and her pastor, 37:07 you know, sometimes she come out and says, 37:08 "Well, honey, why did... 37:10 why did such and such happen?" 37:11 I will say, "Mom, and that's something 37:12 I really can't talk about, 37:14 somebody come privately and said something, 37:15 I can't really talk about." 37:17 And there are times she comes, she say, 37:18 "Well, I... 37:19 You want momma's advice." 37:22 And I say, "Yes, yes I do." 37:25 You know why? 37:26 Because she never did anything willfully to hurt me. 37:30 I knew I may not be able to agree. 37:33 I may not be able to 37:35 say what she maybe wants me to or maybe a certain situation. 37:39 But I knew everything that she did, 37:41 she had my best interest at heart. 37:43 That's excellent. 37:44 And so, again, couldn't always do what she thought 37:47 but I knew and other people they say, 37:49 "Well, you know so and so said somebody." 37:52 Lord, help me. 37:53 I simply said, "Well, momma, 37:54 when is last time they had my best interest at heart." 37:57 Pray for me. 37:58 You see, you had to look 38:00 somebody always saying something, 38:01 did they had your best interests at heart, 38:02 when they do, I'm gonna listen. 38:04 Sure. 38:05 And it's important to know that trust like that 38:07 doesn't just automatically occur. 38:10 You have to earn it. You have to earn it. 38:13 And you mentioned we don't know till we say I do. 38:16 That's when you need to really 38:18 start working on earning those brownie points. 38:21 And what Greg was saying is so true, 38:24 because the enemy is out to kill, steal, and destroy. 38:27 If he can destroy the marriage, they can destroy your union. 38:32 He's got the children 38:34 and eventually, the influence on society, it goes so far, 38:40 so I mean the family unit has been 38:43 and always will be big attack of the evil sprit. 38:49 You know, one of the things that marriage is designed to do 38:51 is to root out selfishness in our life, 38:54 because we're all so selfish and you can't stay married. 38:58 And I'll tell you something, for two years, 39:00 we've been going at it over her, 39:02 and I say going at cause that's it could be. 39:03 All right, bring it on. Come on. 39:05 She was on one side and I was on another. 39:07 We discussed this time and time again. 39:12 We couldn't see eye to eye, true? 39:14 Every time we tried to. 39:16 Every time we just hit this wall. 39:18 I ain't seeing that or I don't want you to see it. 39:21 And independently both praying about it, 39:25 we said, because she was in Panama, I was here. 39:28 I said, "You know, what Lord, if she comes back with again." 39:33 I'm gonna yield. 39:34 I'm gonna let her have it. I'm gonna yield. 39:36 And at the same time in Panama, 39:38 she said, if I bring it to him again 39:42 and he still don't want it, 39:43 I'm gonna yield. 39:44 So we came home, we looked at each other, 39:46 I said, "You know what," 39:47 and I spoke first, and I said, 39:49 you know, if you really want it, okay? 39:51 She said, "You know, I was ready to surrender." 39:52 I said, "Okay, I changed my mind." 39:56 But I spoke first, I let it out, 39:58 I said, okay, you get in. 39:59 And for at least two years, 40:01 we've been working on this thing, but-- 40:02 and I told her, I said you know what, 40:04 "I feel better now, I just feel." 40:05 Amen. Yes. 40:06 You know, it wasn't like constant, 40:08 but it's there, you know. 40:09 It's there, I was like, we're going to deal with this again. 40:11 That was a long time, 40:13 two years was really, a long time. 40:15 But often on, 40:16 it wasn't like everyday we're dealing with same. 40:17 But every time that subject would come up-- 40:19 Maybe I should read out Paul's favorite. 40:21 Be careful of this. 40:23 What happened is that, we were burying it. 40:27 Yes. Yeah, yeah. 40:29 You know, and now every time it come up, 40:31 we will bury it. 40:34 We can't deal with this, 40:35 just leave it and don't touch it, 40:37 but it was just working itself on, 40:41 and it was so hard to get it every time we came up. 40:46 It's like, "Oh, no, we can't deal with it." 40:48 It just brings so much of the happiness, 40:51 but yes, when you do... 40:54 God said, that's what he says, He is love. 40:57 Amen. 40:59 You know it's not that He brings you love. 41:00 And if God is love, when you have God, 41:03 and when you bring your situations to God. 41:08 "God please help me to understand this, 41:10 help me to deal with this, and you know, in a godly way, 41:14 he is going to, and then 41:17 that peace and that joy comes through in, 41:23 and the assurance 41:25 that he is going to help you go through it. 41:29 And be peace, and no longer be a situation. 41:34 And it was just amazing, because we both did, 41:37 actually I had given it up when I said, "Okay, 41:42 this is not going to be between us any more." 41:45 Amen. If that's the way he wants it. 41:48 That's the way we're going to do it, 41:49 and I just thank you to the Lord. 41:51 So at the same time, he had... 41:53 That may be a big issue, I don't know, 41:55 so let's not go with that how big issue might be. 41:57 Yeah. 41:58 It's a long, it's a long story, 41:59 so we don't want to go into that, but... 42:01 But I like that, 42:02 because the husband as he is the house band, 42:05 he's the priest in the household. 42:07 And there's many times, 42:09 because I think probably every one of us here, 42:11 as women we're pretty strong minded, 42:14 you know, we have our opinions, we study, you know, we-- 42:19 you know, it comes to a point many times 42:22 when we don't agree, that we have to trust. 42:26 And if he's built that trust, Pastor Kenny, 42:29 if I trust him, and his connection with God. 42:31 You know Chris, forgive me, but you are so right. 42:33 You got to, sometimes you just got to trust 42:34 the other person's judgment. 42:36 Yes. I can't see it. 42:37 It doesn't make sense to me, but I love her. 42:42 It's not going to kill me. No. 42:44 You know, it's not just, and the house will be happier. 42:47 We got peace. 42:49 That's true, you mentioned trust while ago, 42:50 the important factor is, is if you're living a life 42:52 and you've been consistent back and forth, 42:54 we've been consistent. 42:56 In other words, whatever hits, I can almost say with a surety, 43:00 this is the way she's going to react. 43:02 Exactly. See, I need that. 43:03 I want that, and I want to be that way, 43:05 no matter who hits, no matter what bang goes on. 43:08 She can come up, and say, you know what, 43:09 he didn't do that, he didn't say that 43:11 because that's not consistent. 43:13 Yeah, that's why Jill's point is so important, 43:15 he's never said anything to hurt me before. 43:17 So maybe I'm a little touchy on that subject. 43:19 Exactly. That's not his M.O. 43:20 He doesn't say things to hurt me. 43:22 So maybe I need to just heal here, because of the God, 43:24 I need to learn and grow and trust him. 43:26 I think I'm growing, I think I'm going. 43:28 Praise God, I'm growing but I'll tell you loose, 43:31 it's here's story, honey, 43:32 I'm growing as if I'm not growing. 43:35 We have two dogs, 43:39 and she's wanting another puppy from my sister Tammy's... 43:42 Yes. 43:44 Dealing with the dog, puppy thing. 43:45 And she goes after, sees a little puppies come home. 43:48 "Oh, honey, I want another puppy." 43:49 I say, "Which one you're going to get rid of we got here?" 43:52 And my face doesn't look so good you know. 43:54 So you know, and then she'll come back and say, 43:56 "All those puppies are so squishy, you want to see." 43:58 I say, "Honey, we really, 43:59 we don't need any more puppies." 44:00 "Well, what do you think, I could have one more puppy,? 44:02 "No, honey, let's don't get any more things, 44:03 that I have to look after, and try to take care of 44:05 and that we're always busy, we're-- 44:08 and I'll tell you what, I got to feel so bad about it. 44:10 I don't want another dog. Woo, Lord have mercy. 44:13 I don't want another dog, 44:15 but I've seen that she really did. 44:18 And so finally I on my own, I'm going-- 44:20 not by patching on the back, 44:22 but I' m saying these changes can come about. 44:23 When we look at our spouse 44:25 and see something they really want, 44:26 that really wouldn't be harmful, it wouldn't be bad, 44:28 it's just a matter of- 44:29 I really didn't want another squealy barky. 44:33 Glory, I'm gonna stand on that. 44:35 Yeah, I call my sister, she didn't know it. 44:37 So that is... 44:38 She's got a birthday coming up, 44:40 and I said, I want that puppy that she's been looking at, 44:42 that she has a collar around that she's claimed, 44:44 and she said, "Tammy, don't sell this now, 44:46 I might get this one. 44:47 So tell my sister told me," so I said, I want that one. 44:50 The one that she's kind of claimed, 44:51 without saying anymore about it, 44:53 without bugging about it. 44:55 Said we want that puppy. 44:56 So I told her, and she just squeal with delight, 44:57 "Oh, I'm so happy, happy--" 44:59 So that is hope for us. 45:03 Pray for me, I'm growing. 45:05 No, no puppies-- No puppies-- 45:08 She's worth a puppy. 45:09 She's worth a puppy, yeah, but I'm not going to take care. 45:11 See, we have seven cats, we have seven cats, and... 45:17 They're not puppies. 45:18 This is part of the plan, just make out a happy home. 45:20 I'm telling you, this is making a happy home. 45:21 Having said that, 45:23 when you yield and accord returns, 45:26 you feel down right good. 45:30 Yes. Yes. 45:32 You know, once I made that little decision, 45:34 and began to enter into, 45:37 it's kind of exciting, you know, 45:38 you feel, you feel good 'cause there's nothing between. 45:42 You actually feel good in the soul. 45:44 I think you feel good, because you're doing 45:46 what Christ would have you to do. 45:47 Agreed, yes. 45:49 As a husband, as a wife, and the family. 45:52 She wanted, she wanted and that bothered me, 45:55 every time I said, "No honey we don't," 45:56 I didn't there's like, "No, we're not going to have... 45:58 No honey, we don't need it, it's just not good, 46:00 we got two, and I kept feeling so bad. 46:04 Were you praying for me? 46:05 I was shocked, no I... 46:07 Were you praying for me that I change mind? 46:08 I don't, I don't-- 46:09 It worked if you did. 46:11 I was so shocked, I couldn't help, 46:12 I started hot dialing everybody, I need the puppy. 46:16 But mama's happy. 46:18 But let me share, 46:19 let me share another quote, because we're trying to learn 46:23 how to deal with these situations, 46:25 how to deal with dissension, 46:27 and boy what an example you two are. 46:29 I knew coming into this. 46:30 I thought, I wonder if Jill and Greg's 46:32 ever had any trouble. 46:34 It's okay. It's okay. 46:35 Well, we don't agree on everything. 46:37 But that's how you handle those disagreements, that's the key. 46:39 I'm sorry, I interrupted you. No, you are good, that's fine. 46:42 But Jill's dad before, her dad before we got married said, 46:44 "Make sure future son-in-law 46:47 that you know how to deal with conflict, 46:49 because it's inevitable." 46:51 You'll face conflict and we don't, 46:53 we don't see eye to eye on everything, 46:54 it's just how you handle that, that's the key. 46:56 So no, we're not a perfect couple 46:59 by any means. 47:00 If I can say, I think, forgiveness is key. 47:03 You know, what just Pastor C.A. was talking about, 47:05 getting outside of herself 47:06 and being willing to give in for someone else, and I think, 47:09 'cause that's the example of that's having Jesus' heart 47:12 and Jesus' spirit. 47:14 I remember just real short story here... 47:17 This was our first year of marriage too. 47:18 Our first year seems to be cud. 47:21 It's important. It's important. It is so important. 47:23 As if you're launching the ship. 47:25 That is. That's a critical time. 47:27 I remember we had one of those, 47:28 kind of like Pastor C.A. and Irma, 47:30 you had, where we did not see eye to eye, 47:33 and I just remember thinking I was right, and he was not. 47:36 And I remember distinctly thinking that, 47:38 and the Lord said, "Jill, you should apologize," 47:41 and I said "No," because it's not my fault, 47:44 that is rebellion, right? 47:46 Did you ever say it out loud? Did you pull him out? 47:48 No, this is me to God, okay? Okay. 47:50 I'm not going to apologize, 47:51 so I just kind of did the woman thing, 47:53 you know, the little cold shoulder 47:54 which is not daintily. 47:56 Go on, you're right. 47:57 And so then Greg came to me and he said, 47:59 "Jilly, let's pray about it." 48:01 And I thought, I don't want to pray, 48:03 because God's gonna show me, I'm wrong and you know, 48:05 I was just volleying in my own junk. 48:08 And so he prayed first, and I'll never forget. 48:11 He said, "God forgive me 48:13 for not being the husband to Jill that I should be." 48:18 Now he did not say that to manipulate me. 48:20 It was his heart's cry to God. That's right. 48:23 But as soon as he said that, I thought, "Okay, God, 48:26 God worked in my heart 48:27 to soften that hardness inside." 48:30 And then I said, "Okay, God, I'm not even willing, 48:33 but make me willing to ask for forgiveness, 48:35 and to forgive, and that's what God wants to do. 48:37 Amen. Awesome. Yeah. 48:38 Beautiful example of a family that has Christ says, 48:42 its sinner how different they can be 48:46 than most of the families in this world. 48:48 A man at church one time told that... 48:50 or actually, his wife did a story. 48:54 They're having the issues 48:56 and they want to get them worked out, 48:57 both of them Christian, you know, 48:58 both of them love Jesus, but just issue and it impasses, 49:00 seem like a good example, 49:01 you're just not going to get through this thing. 49:03 She said, one time she's walking through the house, 49:05 and he didn't know she's even home. 49:07 He was in the study, in the bedroom. 49:10 He was kneeling down, and he was praying, 49:13 there's nobody home, so he's praying out loud. 49:16 And he was praying to God, would give him 49:18 that discernment, 49:19 that wisdom of how to handle this situation, 49:22 because he loved his wife, he wanted the marriage to work. 49:26 He was willing to make necessary changes, 49:29 he wanted to be what God wanted him to be. 49:33 That just-- 49:34 he did know she was listening. 49:35 So she heard everything. 49:37 She heard everything that he said. 49:38 It broke her heart, 49:40 and the issue was settled from that moment on, 49:42 it's always been settled. 49:43 I thought how interesting that is, 49:45 when a real heart is opened up, we don't know anyone is around, 49:48 and you're talking to the Lord about these issues 49:51 and somebody overhears. 49:52 It will change your heart, it will change your life. 49:54 Well, by her hearing that prayer, 49:56 that built trust in their heart. 50:00 Didn't just break it, 50:01 but it builds trust that she can trust him. 50:04 Women draw their strength from their husband. 50:06 That's right. Absolutely. 50:08 We do. Oh, yeah. 50:09 We are, you know, I know it's hard for us 50:11 to accept some time, but we are the weaker vessel. 50:14 And that's just how God set it up, 50:16 and we draw our strength. 50:18 So when we're separated, 50:19 when there's dissension in the home, 50:22 then we lose our strength 50:24 and we don't have the strength to deal with the children, 50:28 to deal with other friends, the church, da-da-da. 50:30 It goes on and on. It just multiplies. 50:32 But when you're making a happy home, 50:34 we may not get too far, but we know, 50:36 we'll come back and do this thing again, 50:37 because there are so many homes, 50:41 maybe millions out there, 50:42 that are going through real issues. 50:44 Some are making decision right now. 50:46 But they're going to get divorced, 50:47 they're just going to go their own way, 50:48 and the kids go here, and their mom goes there, 50:50 it's a mess. 50:51 If they would just listen to what God's word has to say, 50:55 and drink it in. 50:56 I tried to drink it in, because and part of the lesson 50:58 had to do with Adam, had to do with Eve. 51:01 And the importance of Eve's life upon Adam. 51:05 Your life upon mine as husband and wife. 51:08 It says that, she's supposed to encourage me. 51:11 So that means sometime we can maybe get discourage, 51:12 we may not admit it, because we're men, 51:14 we don't get discouraged, we don't get down, 51:15 but they encourage us. 51:17 They will help me, they help us and I wrote down something, 51:20 they said, "They're to help, 51:22 women are to soften a man's character." 51:26 We know the Holy Spirit does it, 51:28 but the way she conducts herself 51:29 will soften my character, and give me-- 51:34 well, book Adventist Home says, "Give me completion." 51:37 I need the love of a wife or a woman 51:40 to help me on my rougher edges for my character. 51:44 We know the Holy Spirit up there. 51:45 This is what the woman can do and I am a witness to that, 51:49 because sometime I do some program 51:51 sometime that people say, 51:52 "Well, you look like you're just so... 51:56 I feel like the urgency of the hour 51:58 that Jesus is coming and get this thing out 52:00 and sometime maybe just go... 52:02 and the lady, I said sometimes, she wrote a letter, she said, 52:05 "Well, thank God for your wife." 52:07 And I read, oh, good 52:08 that's why I thank God for my wife. 52:10 They said, "Man, she is so mild, 52:11 and so calm, when she's on there." 52:12 And praise God, she can be able to help control 52:15 meltdown that rough character of yours. 52:18 I said, "Thank you honey," that's what she does. 52:20 So she makes a little balancing to bring to completion, 52:23 where I might be little rough. 52:24 She can help calm me down 52:26 and that's what we're to do with one another. 52:27 You know we've mentioned the book Adventist Home 52:30 and if you don't have that book, 52:32 I encourage you to try to get that book. 52:34 There's a compilation called Happiness Homemade, 52:36 it's a smaller version, that's an excellent book too. 52:39 In fact we've used that 52:40 when we've done marriage counseling. 52:42 There's just so much good information. 52:44 And I think this next couple of sentences, 52:46 I'm going to read is from Adventist Home. 52:48 I don't have it on this particular page, 52:50 but I think it is too, it says 52:52 and we've been talking about this dissension. 52:54 "Parents should be careful 52:55 not to allow the spirit of dissension. 52:58 I thought, okay, what is dissension, 53:00 it's not a word we use that often, 53:02 it's disagreement. 53:03 It's difference of opinion of what you hears. 53:05 Oh, boy. 53:08 "It is strife, it's antagonism, Satan's angels, 53:12 agents to make his impression on the character, 53:16 that's what it does in the home when we allow it. 53:18 It says, if parents will strive, 53:20 this is our goal here tonight. 53:22 If parents will strive for unity in the home 53:25 by inculcating the principles that govern the life of Christ. 53:32 So we got to go back, we got some homework to do, 53:35 we got to study the principles of the life of Christ, 53:38 dissension will be driven out. 53:41 That's right. And unity and love will abide. 53:43 You see there's power in the Word of God. 53:46 Yes. There's power in Jesus. 53:48 In fact we're told there's power 53:50 just even in singing about Jesus. 53:53 And I live that one time, one of our children was sick, 53:57 had a very high fever, couldn't calm her down. 54:00 I was up, I was calling the doctor, 54:02 giving her the lukewarm baths. 54:04 You know, and he would ask me, 54:06 if she's throwing up anything else, no, no, no, 54:08 but she's screaming, screaming, screaming. 54:10 About 2 o'clock in the morning, I remember, 54:12 I read there's power in the name of Jesus. 54:14 Go ahead. 54:15 I was so tired, 54:17 and I held that baby in my arms. 54:18 Come on now. 54:20 And I began to sing, 54:21 'cause I've been praying and praying and praying. 54:23 But I began to sing in the name of Jesus. 54:26 Within 30 seconds, the fever was gone. 54:28 Wow. That's Jesus. 54:30 Hallelujah. That's God. 54:31 What a testimony. She stopped crying. 54:33 Go on. 54:34 There's power in the Word of God. 54:36 There is power in the name of Jesus. 54:39 And we need to fill our homes with the music of Christ, 54:44 with the atmosphere of heaven. 54:46 It can be yours. 54:48 But you have to seek for it, 54:50 you have to look for it as a hidden treasure. 54:53 You know, we'd like to do, 54:54 we got several minutes left here, 54:55 and if it's not right, 54:57 we'll see how it works out here, 54:58 but I'd like for the same group to get back together 55:01 and do one or two more-- 55:04 parts, because I'm saying this is because, 55:06 questions like "How are parents to bring up their children? 55:10 Should children be educated in the home? 55:11 Why did Adam-- 55:13 What did Adam need to start a home? 55:14 Concerning the home, 55:16 what was God's plan for Adam and Eve? 55:17 In the Word of God, what are children to be? 55:19 How should the wife relate to the husband? 55:22 How should the husband relate to the wife? 55:24 Why should children obey their parents? 55:26 What do you, does God require of children? 55:28 Is there a danger of waiting too long to correct a child? 55:31 What question will eventually be given to unfaithful parent? 55:35 We're going to have to meet in the judgment, 55:36 we're going to have to meet at certain question, 55:37 the Bible tells us. 55:39 What will the faithful parents exclaim, 55:41 and what should be the prayer of every parent? 55:43 I really don't want to miss those on faith. 55:45 I know there's people out there, 55:47 they say, "You know, I want to 55:49 or maybe all of those are facing my home 55:51 and the home is going to be destroyed. 55:52 Absolutely. 55:54 So you see if something is not done 55:55 and we just need some one, two, three inside 55:57 maybe just to, you know, 55:58 a little more education and so on. 56:00 No, there is a trap and I'm gonna say quickly, 56:01 I know time is running. 56:03 There is a trap that Christians can fall into 56:04 by thinking that as Christians 56:05 we should not deal with things, you know. 56:08 Well, this is like a sore spot, so let's just be Christ, 56:11 so I cannot deal with them, and that. 56:12 And of course that's a demonic lie 56:15 that will allow things to fester 56:16 so that when they when they get dealt with, 56:18 they become World War III. 56:20 And probably with just a little puff of smoke, 56:22 but now it's a nuclear explosion. 56:24 Because you're under the guise of being in prison, 56:26 you're not gonna deal with it. 56:27 And we ran, okay, well, it's a point of contention. 56:30 So let's just love Jesus and not deal with that thing. 56:32 But it's still there and it's growing and growing, 56:35 and when you deal with it. 56:37 Ellen White says this, she says. 56:38 "Christ uttered his most scathing rebukes 56:40 with tears in his eyes." 56:42 So there was times 56:43 when he had to get down to business. 56:44 He had to tell people their sins. 56:46 But He cried while he was doing, you know. 56:49 So I, if you're crying and telling me off, 56:51 I can take that. 56:53 You know little 'cause I know you're feeling my pain, 56:55 you know, I can take that. 56:56 So sometimes, He had to cry, 56:58 but He had to get that truth told. 56:59 So that healing could begin. 57:00 Amen. Amen. 57:02 We only have 30 seconds left. 57:04 We'll do this, this is part one then. 57:05 Amen. Part one. 57:06 I promised, I thought wed get through three questions, 57:08 we got through two. 57:10 We need a quick prayer. 57:11 Pray for those who are making decisions right now, honey. 57:13 Just a quick real prayer. Amen. 57:15 Most gracious heavenly Father, 57:17 we just pray for that power, we pray for the urgency 57:21 to come into the hearts 57:22 and the minds of our viewers to want, 57:24 to be motivated to get these books out, 57:27 to get the Bible out, 57:28 to order these books to help them 57:30 to draw closer to You and to one another, Father, 57:33 this is our prayer in Jesus name. 57:35 Amen. Amen. 57:37 Praise the Lord. |
Revised 2016-05-26