¤ ¤
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¤ I want to spend my
life mending broken people ¤
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¤ I want to spend
my life removing pain ¤
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¤ Lord let my words
heal a heart that hurts ¤
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¤ I want to spend my
life mending broken people ¤
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¤ ¤
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Hello friends and welcome
to your program 3ABN today. My
00:01:07.66\00:01:11.00
is Idalia Dinzey and it's a
pleasure to spend this next hour
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with you our 3ABN family. During
this hour we're going to be so
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blessed. We're going to talk
about a topic that is very, very
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important and very relevant
for you and for us today. And we
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have a special guest. The
special guest is no stranger to
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some of our 3ABN
viewing family This guest is
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Dr. Nathanael Gracia, welcome.
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Thank you, Idalia. Thank you for
having us and we're happy to be
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here.
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I am so happy that you're able
to make it to our studios and
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dedicate this time so you can
share some gems, some treasures
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that you have discovered. You
are representing, you are the
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founder of which
ministry? Tell us about it.
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Grace Connection.
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Very well. So how did
this ministry come about?
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We started with the idea of
Grace Connection way back in
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2010 when I was the ministerial
secretary for a conference in
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Jamaica, the North Jamaica
Conference. And I was going
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about from pastor to pastor's
house to help them with some
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healing. There were some issues
in the field like you know God's
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people just like Paul
and Barnabas had issues that
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happened and through the healing
process God has given me the
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vision to speak reconciliation
to the hearts of the pastors.
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It's interesting that you
mention that you were working
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with the pastors because we
as members of the church forget
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that our pastors are human
beings, that they also need help
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Exactly and healers need healing
(Amen) The doctor needs a doctor
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God has blessed us through
the Holy Spirit to have that
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ministry to start. And when I
established that program it was
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a one-by-one program. And this
work God has allowed us to take
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it around the world afterward
where it was no longer for
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ministers who needed healing but
for everyone because this is so
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important to have healing. It's
poisonous to have grudges, to
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bare unforgiveness. It is a
poison and recently they start
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teaching forgiveness at
Harvard University. They have
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Forgiveness 101 to see how it
is therapeutic to forgive and to
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have forgiveness in your heart.
Can you imagine what God has
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already given us, now science
is realizing how important it is
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So your telling me that
at Harvard University, the
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university well known around the
world teaches Forgiveness 101?
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(Forgiveness.) Now how long, I
mean it doesn't matter how long
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they've been doing it but it's a
good thing they're doing it. But
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it is surprising.
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Yes to show the correlation,
because our cells at all levels
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receive information. The
information that is found in the
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membrane is passed through your
DNA so that means if you weren't
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born bitter and you learn how
to forgive and the love of God
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comes to your heart there can be
a change and those information
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is through what we hear and no
wonder. Faith comes from hearing
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and what we hear is from
the word of God. When somebody
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finally can forgive and this
is very important lesson I've
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learned through our ministry.
A lady could not forgive at all
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forgive her mother-in-law and
I can understand why because the
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mother-in-law was living with
her and she had only one son and
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the one son was like so precious
for that mother (of course)
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so exactly. And in her culture
she wanted to cook for her son
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and then she would at times
remove the food from the table
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and say that's not how my son
would want it and that woman for
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eight years could
not have children.
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Okay, I'm sorry Dr. Gracia. You
know what I think. I think that
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Harvard needs to be
teaching also Mother-In-Law 101.
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(Laughter) How's that?
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Yes, it all comes to the
forgive- ness and acceptance.
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And this person that
story really impacted us.
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Yes! This woman could not
have kids for eight years.
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No children for eight
years. And nothing was wrong
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with her body, until she went to
that specific person who was a
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psychologist and also a
Christian to just try and find
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out diagnose what is happening
with your soul because when it
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well with your soul everything
else will happen because we are
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are spiritual beings no matter
what. (Right, yes, that's right)
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We were created in the image
of God and if the spirit is not
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right other things...because
there's that psychosomatic
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effect where the spirit and...
What happened is when they found
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out...She said I'm not happy at
home. I hate my mother-in-law.
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Okay, Pastor, I mean Dr. Gracia
I'm going to stop you right
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right there. I want the
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viewers to join us in prayer.
We already started this just
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giving them a little taste or a
tease of what we're going to be
00:07:05.35\00:07:09.56
discussing during this hour. And
surely you at home might have
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already connected with the topic
because it is a challenge to
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have a unified family, healthy
family, healthy environment so
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you're going to teach us a lot
of tips during this hour and God
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bless you, for what you do. I am
blessed already by listening as
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I long to be the ideal mother-
in-law for my daughters-in-law
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whenever my children are married
So how about if we just take a
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moment. Let's pray. How's that?
And I'm going to ask you to pray
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for our viewers that are
watching this program so that
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the Lord will just open your
hearts and your minds, your ears
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and that we could have a
teachable spirit okay thank you.
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Our mighty heavenly Father, we
come to your holy presence (yes)
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You ask us to forgive just like
you forgave us. In the name of
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Jesus, we ask that the Holy
Spirit may be in every home,
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every heart. We know it's
not easy but do your work. You
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promise that we can do all
things through you and we do
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understand we cannot be saved
unless we forgive those who have
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hurt us. May your Holy Spirit
be with us now. In the name of
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Jesus, we pray Amen.
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This is wonderful. This hour
is going to go by really fast.
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(really fast) so we're going
to bring ourselves now toward
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this blessing, Um
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Dr. Gracia, we also have a
prayer in song and we'd like to
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take that pause at this time.
We'd like to invite you viewers
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to meditate in this message in
song And this is brought to you
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by Jayme Stabol and that song is
entitled My Jesus I Love Thee.
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¤ ¤ Piano Solo My
Jesus I Love Thee.
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¤ ¤
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Thank you young Jayme
Stabol for that introduction of
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My Jesus I Love Thee. God bless
you and continue using you to
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minister the hearts of all the
listeners. Radio listeners, 3ABN
00:12:01.28\00:12:06.99
radio and also 3ABN viewers.
Friends as you already know the
00:12:07.02\00:12:11.19
topic today is about
reconciliation and we have
00:12:11.23\00:12:15.16
Dr. Nathanael Gracia with us
and he is the founder of Grace
00:12:15.20\00:12:20.87
Connection Family Ministry. So
we're going to continue. I know
00:12:20.90\00:12:26.07
I left you on a cliff hanger so
please Dr. Gracia let's continue
00:12:26.11\00:12:30.08
For those who've just joined
us just briefly (summarize)
00:12:30.11\00:12:34.38
summarize.
00:12:34.42\00:12:35.75
Okay this is a married woman who
is willing to have family and
00:12:35.78\00:12:42.42
cannot have children and they
could not find out why. And a
00:12:42.46\00:12:47.63
Christian psychologist started
to inquire to find out to
00:12:47.66\00:12:52.57
diagnose what's the issue.
Physically everything was okay.
00:12:52.60\00:12:56.14
But as mentioned earlier
there is a very good connection
00:12:56.17\00:13:00.08
between the spirit and the body.
Psychosomatic reality of our
00:13:00.11\00:13:05.45
being. And as the Christian
psychologist diagnosed that at
00:13:05.48\00:13:11.35
home she had that anger
issue, that hatred. Because we
00:13:11.39\00:13:15.92
need love to
00:13:15.96\00:13:17.73
function (Yes) And he
discovered she could not have
00:13:17.76\00:13:24.67
any children because of that
constant hatred and anger and
00:13:24.70\00:13:30.97
indifference in her heart. And
he asked her, he said, Okay I
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see the problem. Your mother-in-
law is the problem. So that
00:13:36.21\00:13:39.38
would be a monster-in-law you
could say. The best way to kill
00:13:39.41\00:13:44.49
the monster is to love
the monster. It's no longer a
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monster. It becomes now a toy.
That's it. Now she was assigned
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to go and every day to say I
love you Mom, not even mother-
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in-law. Not to call her by
her name, not to say I love you
00:13:58.97\00:14:02.04
Idalia but to say I love you mom
00:14:02.07\00:14:04.27
Wow! And not even I love Mrs...
00:14:04.31\00:14:07.38
So and so. No that would not
work. And she has to call her
00:14:07.41\00:14:14.82
mom and to do it continually.
She came back to the office and
00:14:14.85\00:14:19.05
said, It was hard! It was
difficult. And then he said
00:14:19.09\00:14:24.69
Continue. And as she continued
when she would move away the
00:14:24.73\00:14:29.43
food she would not cook and
say I want you to taste it first
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because you are the best cook
in the house. Taste it to see if
00:14:32.80\00:14:36.64
your son will like it if it
is according to your taste. And
00:14:36.67\00:14:41.01
then she would feel so flattered
And then she put herself in the
00:14:41.04\00:14:46.08
mom's shoes who had the one
child and she said what if now
00:14:46.11\00:14:49.38
I cannot have any kids. I can
understand when I finally have a
00:14:49.42\00:14:54.02
child. If it is a son. Oh I'm
going to be protective, etc. and
00:14:54.06\00:14:57.86
she finally forgave her and
guess what without realizing
00:14:57.89\00:15:02.86
after three months she started
to speak because she became
00:15:02.90\00:15:07.04
pregnant. (Wow) She had
her child because as I was
00:15:07.07\00:15:11.47
mentioning about the cells, we
get our information and it goes
00:15:11.51\00:15:14.64
to the nucleus of our cells
and the information that can
00:15:14.68\00:15:21.28
transform even what was
there before. So what happens
00:15:21.32\00:15:25.92
physically to us when we don't
forgive is that every energy we
00:15:25.95\00:15:30.29
have going to the cells is now
concentrated to fight and flight
00:15:30.33\00:15:35.13
that reaction of fight or flight
it's always into now resistance
00:15:35.16\00:15:41.27
instead of producing. And
that's how cancer can even
00:15:41.30\00:15:45.97
happen. So we can heal ourself
with forgiveness and she could
00:15:46.01\00:15:50.71
now have a child because she
started to forgive. Nothing was
00:15:50.75\00:15:54.88
changed in her diet but just the
mental diet. So no wonder God
00:15:54.92\00:16:01.09
emphasized in the Bible and
emphasized it in a way that we
00:16:01.12\00:16:04.43
never considered it that way.
You and I, we cannot be saved
00:16:04.46\00:16:07.96
if we don't forgive. (That's
true) And we say lightly, we
00:16:08.00\00:16:12.50
say oh maybe it's an opinion.
No, we bring a condemnation
00:16:12.53\00:16:17.24
onto ourselves when
we say the Lord's prayer.
00:16:17.27\00:16:21.08
What do you say in
your Lord's prayer?
00:16:21.11\00:16:23.41
Forgive as we forgive...
And how do we forgive?
00:16:23.45\00:16:27.35
We forgive with condition,
if you don't do it again. If you
00:16:27.38\00:16:31.25
ask me to forgive you. If you
stay in your lane. But how God
00:16:31.29\00:16:36.59
forgive us and now we are
condemning ourselves saying
00:16:36.62\00:16:39.96
Forgive us as we forgive
and that same verse went further
00:16:40.00\00:16:43.97
If you don't forgive and I'm
talking to someone here, If you
00:16:44.00\00:16:47.50
don't forgive says the word
the Father in heaven will not
00:16:47.54\00:16:51.84
forgive you. If you forgive then
you will be forgiven. Can I be
00:16:51.87\00:16:55.81
saved without forgiveness? It
is okay for me to sin where I'm
00:16:55.84\00:17:00.78
being okay. It's not okay to sin
But we understand that we are
00:17:00.82\00:17:03.39
sinners, we will sin. But if I'm
now not forgiven, this is very
00:17:03.42\00:17:08.96
powerful. We have all sinned and
come short of the glory of God.
00:17:08.99\00:17:14.13
Now if I'm not forgiven I cannot
make it to the kingdom. Now my
00:17:14.16\00:17:19.43
forgiveness has to now go with
the forgiveness I give unto my
00:17:19.47\00:17:25.11
boss who did something wrong to
me. And now he doesn't even know
00:17:25.14\00:17:28.71
he hurt me. He is going to make
it to the kingdom because he
00:17:28.74\00:17:33.52
asked God to forgive him but I'm
still holding that grudge and I
00:17:33.55\00:17:37.49
miss the mark, I miss heaven
because I did not let go of my
00:17:37.52\00:17:41.42
spouse or of my child or of my
father, of my mother, I did not
00:17:41.46\00:17:48.53
forgive that person. And we
don't put enough attention while
00:17:48.56\00:17:52.90
we are thinking about other
things, thinking about this and
00:17:52.93\00:17:55.34
that and we get so
distracted while there's a curse
00:17:55.37\00:17:58.61
on the land. A curse.
00:17:58.64\00:18:00.58
I want to mention to you that
holding a grudge and resolving
00:18:02.58\00:18:08.78
the problem is not something
that families, that I know of
00:18:08.82\00:18:13.49
anyway. How do you dialogue
about forgiveness in the home?
00:18:13.52\00:18:20.10
How do you dialogue
about getting to the point of
00:18:20.13\00:18:24.40
discussing and feeling
comfortable that here's a
00:18:24.43\00:18:29.07
problem we need to talk about
this. We need to resolve it.
00:18:29.10\00:18:30.94
This is not easy because
our human reaction, as you know,
00:18:30.97\00:18:35.11
when we are stressed.
We're under stress, because this
00:18:35.14\00:18:38.15
caused conflict and conflict
causes stress. (Right) Because
00:18:38.18\00:18:41.85
always the first two answers,
flight or fight usually is the
00:18:41.88\00:18:46.49
fight and we have conflict in
the language There's a beef. And
00:18:46.52\00:18:52.86
then the other thing is the
flight whereby the person...I'm
00:18:52.89\00:18:56.36
moving out. I'm not staying in
your presence whether within a
00:18:56.40\00:18:58.80
marital relationship or the
family relationship, that's what
00:18:58.83\00:19:02.44
usually happens. We need that
entity. That's why church is
00:19:02.47\00:19:06.98
important. Church will be the
catalyst will help, will usher
00:19:07.01\00:19:11.45
you to that discussion. Usually
even before communion they
00:19:11.48\00:19:17.02
mention the other, that
text is put out of context. It's
00:19:17.05\00:19:19.22
every time you bring your
offering to the altar. People
00:19:19.25\00:19:22.02
usually think it's when we have
communion we have to do that.
00:19:22.06\00:19:24.53
You need that outside influence
to make it happen but without
00:19:24.56\00:19:32.53
that it's not easy. If you
do have family reunion a parent
00:19:32.57\00:19:37.77
could entertain that and say is
there something that needs to be
00:19:37.81\00:19:41.94
spoken about but the pride
of parents usually keeps them
00:19:41.98\00:19:46.51
silent. You should have known
I've done my best and your best
00:19:46.55\00:19:50.92
usually is what has hurt me
because you give what you have
00:19:50.95\00:19:54.36
and your best was what was
hurting me. In your pride, it's
00:19:54.39\00:19:58.99
not an easy thing. We need the
Holy Spirit. It is a gift of God
00:19:59.03\00:20:03.63
Definitely we need to be humble
as well. Humility you know that
00:20:03.67\00:20:08.90
should be able to resolve
issues in the home. Now a Grace
00:20:08.94\00:20:14.14
Connection Family Ministry has
helped many, many homes because
00:20:14.18\00:20:21.05
you travel throughout the world
and you give seminars. You also
00:20:21.08\00:20:25.52
speak French. You are on 3ABN
Frances. I used to speak French
00:20:25.55\00:20:31.29
but anyway I'm not going
to even try it right now.
00:20:31.33\00:20:33.76
I forgive you. (Laughter)
00:20:33.80\00:20:35.13
French phrase. Oui, Oui. So yes
this is definitely an important
00:20:35.16\00:20:42.87
topic that we as family members
need to develop a good habit
00:20:42.90\00:20:47.94
of having a discussion about
how we're going to deal with the
00:20:47.98\00:20:55.62
differences in the family. Now
based on the example that you
00:20:55.65\00:21:00.39
placed...It was a real case. The
only son brings his mother to
00:21:00.42\00:21:08.63
live with his new bride in his
new home and the mother wants to
00:21:08.66\00:21:15.67
tend to her son. And I can see
she wants her son to be happy
00:21:15.70\00:21:18.97
and do everything for him. She's
done it for him all his life but
00:21:19.01\00:21:23.71
then also now there's the bride
that needed to...Was she fleeing
00:21:23.75\00:21:30.95
She was fighting. There's that
passive aggressive reaction when
00:21:30.99\00:21:38.19
we are fighting, resisting. And
that's where the energy in the
00:21:38.23\00:21:40.43
body, in the soul, because
your soul is your body and your
00:21:40.46\00:21:44.53
spirit. When a soul is in a
fighting mood the energy is no
00:21:44.57\00:21:48.67
longer there. You're no longer
creative, you're no longer
00:21:48.70\00:21:51.27
progressing and all these things
affect you so you don't move
00:21:51.31\00:21:56.61
forward. You take the lower road
and sometimes we don't even know
00:21:56.64\00:22:00.82
we are doing it. And my example
when this ministry was going
00:22:00.85\00:22:07.56
around it was in Jamaica that
happened and there was a father
00:22:07.59\00:22:11.36
who could not forgive actually
it's a son could not forgive his
00:22:11.39\00:22:18.43
own father. He was 74 years old.
After I presented the message of
00:22:18.47\00:22:22.84
forgiveness and I said you have
to forgive to go to heaven and I
00:22:22.87\00:22:29.38
read the text and I said
my Father in heaven will not
00:22:29.41\00:22:32.51
forgive you if you don't forgive
others. And then he asked me a
00:22:32.55\00:22:35.18
very difficult question. He
said to me, Pastor, you're way
00:22:35.22\00:22:39.05
younger than I am, I'm 73, I
could be your father. But I need
00:22:39.09\00:22:44.06
your help here. After that
topic that challenged me and
00:22:44.09\00:22:47.56
you say that we
00:22:47.60\00:22:48.93
have to forgive like God has
forgiven us in Christ. And then
00:22:48.96\00:22:55.07
he said my father is dead but
I cannot forgive him. And I said
00:22:55.10\00:22:59.01
why? He said he started to beat
my brother. My brother was 19, I
00:22:59.04\00:23:05.25
was 17. When he was beating him
so hard and I was crying because
00:23:05.28\00:23:08.55
he beat him for over five hours.
He tied him somewhere and he
00:23:08.58\00:23:15.42
found a way to cut that rope and
he left the house. When he left
00:23:15.46\00:23:20.43
the house, now I'm 74.
I've never seen my brother ever.
00:23:20.46\00:23:23.67
(Wow) My father died. I hate
my father. Those were his words.
00:23:23.70\00:23:29.77
And until today I know that I
cannot allow that hatred to make
00:23:29.80\00:23:34.68
to prevent me from being saved
because it's sure Pastor, it's
00:23:34.71\00:23:39.15
sure. I won't be saved. And
people don't understand that.
00:23:39.18\00:23:42.15
You understand that. Your
salvation is at stake right
00:23:42.18\00:23:47.06
there with that thing about
forgiveness. And Satan gets us
00:23:47.09\00:23:51.99
so busy talking about
every other things, but that is
00:23:52.03\00:23:57.70
important. This is so crucial.
And that's why in Malachi 4
00:23:57.73\00:24:02.30
verse 6 and I want you to read
this with me. And he will turn
00:24:02.34\00:24:06.74
the hearts of the fathers to the
children and the hearts of the
00:24:06.78\00:24:11.98
children to the fathers lest I
come and strike the earth with a
00:24:12.01\00:24:17.79
curse. (Wow) And that curse is
that when we are not whole, when
00:24:17.82\00:24:24.03
we are not complete we cannot
produce a healthy family, a
00:24:24.06\00:24:29.96
healthy environment. And this
man will change my life because
00:24:30.00\00:24:33.00
after we prayed and I
told you Idalia, we cannot have
00:24:33.03\00:24:38.91
forgiveness
00:24:38.94\00:24:40.34
without the Holy Spirit. (That's
right) It is a gift of God. And
00:24:40.38\00:24:43.14
I went on my knees with him and
I said let's pray. And I said,
00:24:43.18\00:24:47.98
God may the Holy Spirit come
now and give him the gift of
00:24:48.02\00:24:52.85
forgiveness if we ask for that.
Because the gift of love we can
00:24:52.89\00:24:56.99
receive it. You cannot love
without forgiveness. You have to
00:24:57.03\00:25:03.26
forgive and now he started to
cry. He wept on his knees with
00:25:03.30\00:25:07.37
me. And he said I feel light. He
said, Pastor, I am free I feel
00:25:07.40\00:25:13.27
light. I am light. I forgive
the memory of that pain. And he
00:25:13.31\00:25:18.95
hugged me. Now on my way from
that seminar watch this. The
00:25:18.98\00:25:23.62
Holy Spirit spoke to me and said
Nathanael, why you just helped
00:25:23.65\00:25:28.62
someone to be free and your own
father, you have not forgiven.
00:25:28.66\00:25:32.66
Because my father left my house
while I was still in the womb.
00:25:32.69\00:25:37.23
I have never met him. I never
met him until I was 12. When I
00:25:37.27\00:25:41.70
met him at 12 it was just for 30
minutes. And then the next time
00:25:41.74\00:25:46.31
I will hear from him it was...
This is something God wants to
00:25:46.34\00:25:51.28
remove that curse, that curse
that is spoken of in Malachi 4
00:25:51.31\00:25:56.18
verse 6. While I'm driving back
it was a four hour journey. I'm
00:25:56.22\00:26:01.36
coming from Montego Bay driving
back, now the Holy Spirit said
00:26:01.39\00:26:09.53
you set this man free through
Me, but what about you? Have you
00:26:09.56\00:26:14.17
forgiven your father. I said,
I don't hate my father. He said,
00:26:14.20\00:26:16.67
No, I don't want
that indifference because
00:26:16.71\00:26:19.91
guess what the opposite of love
is not hatred. You cannot see
00:26:19.94\00:26:26.51
hatred. You see indifference
because I was indifferent. I
00:26:26.55\00:26:29.15
could not even call him Dad.
I always call him by the name my
00:26:29.18\00:26:34.09
mother used to complain
about the person who left us,
00:26:34.12\00:26:36.83
who abandoned us. He bought
houses for all the children. He
00:26:36.86\00:26:41.66
was living in Canada, I was
in Haiti. And then He said, you
00:26:41.70\00:26:46.53
have not let go of that and I
started to cry. And watch this.
00:26:46.57\00:26:51.61
As I reached the house, I
was living in a new home, nobody
00:26:51.64\00:26:56.58
knew my phone number, I don't
know how he got it, through who.
00:26:56.61\00:26:59.95
The phone rang, it was the time,
it was not cell phone time, it
00:26:59.98\00:27:03.15
the time of house phone. And
as I reached I put my luggage, I
00:27:03.18\00:27:09.46
was still crying, my eyes
were still red (and the phone is
00:27:09.49\00:27:14.10
ringing) the phone is ringing.
Guess who is calling? My father.
00:27:14.13\00:27:16.53
After about 18 years I have
00:27:16.56\00:27:20.34
not seen the man, talking to him
He said it makes me feel warm
00:27:20.37\00:27:26.57
in my heart to hear your voice
my son. And notice that guy said
00:27:26.61\00:27:34.62
I was not his. And now it's
because the Holy Spirit hit me
00:27:34.65\00:27:38.75
at that same time and said, You
have to let go. But what I did
00:27:38.79\00:27:42.09
not tell you on my way in that
same bus, on that bus, I said
00:27:42.12\00:27:47.60
God have your way. He said
if you want my way say in your
00:27:47.63\00:27:51.30
heart, I love you Dad. I said,
no, I can say I love you Niquel
00:27:51.33\00:27:54.60
which is his first name but I
cannot go and say I love you Dad
00:27:54.64\00:27:58.31
And He said you have to let go.
And then I let go. I cried the
00:27:58.34\00:28:02.21
most and I said I love you Dad.
And that was the result. So the
00:28:02.24\00:28:06.08
Holy Spirit united our hearts
at that time and that was the
00:28:06.11\00:28:10.12
defining moment for me to
know God is behind that thing.
00:28:10.15\00:28:15.16
God wants it. I could not have
started a family. I could not
00:28:15.19\00:28:17.26
relate to my own son today if
that did not happen. We need...
00:28:17.29\00:28:21.53
Because you give what you have
And guess what, now when I go
00:28:21.56\00:28:25.70
to seminars or preach in Canada,
as you know we travel around the
00:28:25.73\00:28:29.54
world with this ministry, guess
who is in the audience proud to
00:28:29.57\00:28:33.34
say, this is my son and we are
taking pictures every time. For
00:28:33.38\00:28:37.81
my birthday, every new year we
talk and we talk and I love him
00:28:37.85\00:28:42.28
and if you are listening now
Dad, I love you, and it's all in
00:28:42.32\00:28:46.72
the past and God has turned my
heart to love you and to cherish
00:28:46.76\00:28:52.89
everything I have and
this has marked my ministry and
00:28:52.93\00:28:56.40
it has been going
00:28:56.43\00:28:57.90
around the world with that
ministry of reconciliation.
00:28:57.93\00:29:00.14
When you shared the story about
the monster-in-law you know, I
00:29:00.17\00:29:08.41
thought mmm let me ask Dr.
Gracia did he ever have a moment
00:29:08.44\00:29:13.18
when he had to learn to forgive
somebody, if you had been hurt.
00:29:13.21\00:29:18.95
And just now you just shared
that. So from experience because
00:29:18.99\00:29:24.26
textually we can share so many
things, right? But when it's
00:29:24.29\00:29:29.43
experienced it's a totally
different level, a totally
00:29:29.46\00:29:32.47
different level.
00:29:32.50\00:29:33.84
And deeper than that is that
sometimes you don't even know
00:29:33.87\00:29:36.44
you hold grudges. You think that
mutually God is not with that.
00:29:36.47\00:29:40.58
It's when you can say literally
I love you and how do you know
00:29:40.61\00:29:44.05
you love that person. When you
can pray for all the blessings
00:29:44.08\00:29:47.42
for that person. (Amen) Not the
type of prayers of David, God go
00:29:47.45\00:29:50.72
get them for me, no not those
David prayers. The prayers what
00:29:50.75\00:29:55.09
you want for yourself, for your
own family, for your children,
00:29:55.12\00:29:58.59
for that same enemy, that same
person who hurt you, can you
00:29:58.63\00:30:02.86
pray genuinely. Not because
you want oh if I pray for that
00:30:02.90\00:30:07.94
person and I will get whatever I
pray for him. (Right) No, no, no
00:30:07.97\00:30:11.61
not even for you. That blessing
you receive, that's when you
00:30:11.64\00:30:15.64
know you have forgiven. When
you can do that, when you can
00:30:15.68\00:30:21.12
genuinely say I love you.
Because we have been riding on
00:30:21.15\00:30:24.95
neutral and neutral is I don't
hate him but I have nothing to
00:30:24.99\00:30:28.39
do with him. God said you have
to love even your enemy. There's
00:30:28.42\00:30:32.33
room even if your spouse is a
pain in your life God says even
00:30:32.36\00:30:39.50
to love your enemy. So we
are so comfortable to say that I
00:30:39.53\00:30:43.87
don't have anything against him
but that's indifference. Because
00:30:43.91\00:30:47.54
if you just say, I don't hate
him, if he has a need I will do
00:30:47.58\00:30:52.15
something. What is your word?
If he has a need. That means I'm
00:30:52.18\00:30:56.42
over there so I'm the better
person. I will condescend and
00:30:56.45\00:31:00.52
help him. No! no, no, no. You
have to even the person who has
00:31:00.56\00:31:04.26
hurt, and that's why the verse
says if someone has something
00:31:04.29\00:31:09.73
against you, you go to him.
You don't have to be in that
00:31:09.76\00:31:13.13
position where, okay, you hurt
me, I'm the better person and
00:31:13.17\00:31:19.31
I'm condescending to you. No, no
no. It's about to let go and let
00:31:19.34\00:31:23.35
God and just like Christ did
it He became just like us and
00:31:23.38\00:31:28.32
through the incarnation we see
the best act of humility and of
00:31:28.35\00:31:34.09
love and of forgiveness.
And that's very important.
00:31:34.12\00:31:36.96
Amen Hallelujah. That's
beautiful. You know all this is
00:31:36.99\00:31:40.66
truth being spoken but it is
so difficult to do because we're
00:31:40.70\00:31:45.63
prideful. You know pride keeps
us from accepting that we've
00:31:45.67\00:31:49.14
done wrong, from accepting you
know I'm the one that needs to
00:31:49.17\00:31:53.21
go and take that step, the first
step. No, let them come to me,
00:31:53.24\00:31:56.85
they offended me, they know what
they did. Or you know, I don't
00:31:56.88\00:32:02.05
hate them but they can just stay
in their lane and I'll stay in
00:32:02.08\00:32:05.49
my lane, right?
00:32:05.52\00:32:07.29
And I don't hate them and that's
the temptation. At that time the
00:32:07.32\00:32:10.33
energy and I'm not into New Age
when I say energy. I'm talking
00:32:10.36\00:32:15.50
about the love that we need
to...And God...Why would you
00:32:15.53\00:32:21.64
think 1 Corinthians 13 says
even if you give your body to be
00:32:21.67\00:32:24.51
burned, burning is a terrible
thing. So even if you would burn
00:32:24.54\00:32:30.11
that means you still don't love.
What it means by that? You can
00:32:30.15\00:32:36.45
still do things out of duty but
your heart is not in it. So if
00:32:36.48\00:32:42.46
your heart is not in it it's
because you have not forgiven
00:32:42.49\00:32:45.33
So you are nothing. So
it's nothing even if you burn
00:32:45.36\00:32:49.43
yourself or something just for
the cause or he's my husband,
00:32:49.46\00:32:54.94
she's my wife, had to do it,
yeah, my children, your heart is
00:32:54.97\00:32:57.64
not in it. You're praying I
could get out of it. God says I
00:32:57.67\00:33:02.94
want your soul, God wants all of
you to say yes, just like Jesus
00:33:02.98\00:33:07.08
said yes forgive them. At that
point He was saying I love you
00:33:07.12\00:33:11.25
that same words that did not
accept me, I love you just as
00:33:11.29\00:33:16.42
you are.
00:33:16.46\00:33:17.93
And the past is the past.
00:33:17.96\00:33:19.29
Exactly. It's not easy, but when
the Holy Spirit comes to you
00:33:19.33\00:33:23.20
that's why if you want to
forgive, I'm talking to you now,
00:33:23.23\00:33:26.03
you've got to be specific and
say God give me that heart to
00:33:26.07\00:33:30.57
forgive. And there's a way
to... Some of us may need some
00:33:30.61\00:33:35.51
conditions. You maybe want
somebody to come and ask you for
00:33:35.54\00:33:38.88
forgiveness so you can forgive.
Pray about it. Be specific in
00:33:38.91\00:33:44.65
your prayers. Ask God, God can
you show him how the hurt has
00:33:44.69\00:33:50.19
reached to me. Because some
people don't even see it. Maybe
00:33:50.23\00:33:54.23
they may go to the barbershop.
Or they may go to some other
00:33:54.26\00:34:00.97
program or watching a show
and somebody say Oh that's how I
00:34:01.00\00:34:04.24
hurt the person. And if that is
important to you but you don't
00:34:04.27\00:34:07.21
need the person to ask you for
forgiveness in order to forgive.
00:34:07.24\00:34:11.41
I'm going to share your website
We're going take time later on
00:34:11.45\00:34:15.32
in the program. We just
have a few minutes left but your
00:34:15.35\00:34:18.95
website is
GraceConnectionFamily.org
00:34:18.99\00:34:24.19
and they can just navigate your
website and also contact you
00:34:24.23\00:34:27.23
through that. Because we
want to empower our friends, our
00:34:27.26\00:34:34.10
neighbors, ourselves and this is
our resource that the Lord has
00:34:34.14\00:34:38.47
provided through your ministry
Your ministry Grace Connection
00:34:38.51\00:34:43.01
grew out of you serving
some elders of the church, yes,
00:34:43.04\00:34:49.98
pastors of the church
recognizing that just because
00:34:50.02\00:34:53.25
you are a pastor does not mean
that you're not hurting. So you
00:34:53.29\00:34:58.23
tended to the hurt, you tended
to those pastors to try to bring
00:34:58.26\00:35:02.53
reconciliation in those homes.
And probably there were ill
00:35:02.56\00:35:09.00
congregations because if the
home is not healthy nothing is
00:35:09.04\00:35:12.61
healthy right in your circle of
influence. So you were impressed
00:35:12.64\00:35:18.61
by the Lord to found this Grace
Connection Ministry. So now
00:35:18.65\00:35:26.29
we've talked about the in-laws
the son, the daughter-in-law
00:35:26.32\00:35:28.02
we talked about a daughter, we
talked about a father, how they
00:35:28.06\00:35:34.53
reconciled. Sometimes we do need
to talk about those real life
00:35:34.56\00:35:41.47
points like forgiveness or hurt
and problems before we can even
00:35:41.50\00:35:47.84
understand the seminars you were
trying to give about the final
00:35:47.88\00:35:54.58
events. So let not anything
exist between me and the Lord.
00:35:54.62\00:36:00.36
So that is a stumbling block, if
you will. This is how I'm seeing
00:36:00.39\00:36:05.19
it or digesting this. That was a
stumbling block for this family
00:36:05.23\00:36:10.43
but once that block was moved
and the distraction was taken
00:36:10.47\00:36:15.90
not to undermine that. That is
a very valid thing to go through
00:36:15.94\00:36:21.11
But there is a life to come. We
are not of this world, pilgrims
00:36:21.14\00:36:29.18
in this world. So we are getting
ready for the world to come.
00:36:29.22\00:36:32.89
So thank you very much
for sharing the importance of
00:36:32.92\00:36:39.19
accepting I'm hurt and I need
help and I want to be reconciled
00:36:39.23\00:36:45.60
So now what is the next step?
00:36:45.63\00:36:48.44
After you do that you have
to, by faith now, act on it. You
00:36:48.47\00:36:56.04
become a new person as God
taught you but now you have to
00:36:56.08\00:36:59.78
give a chance. It's the
application. This is how we
00:36:59.81\00:37:05.35
apply turn the other cheek, to
be vulnerable. There is a level
00:37:05.39\00:37:09.26
of vulnerability, we have to do.
If you risk nothing, you have
00:37:09.29\00:37:15.26
nothing. The seed for every
relationship is forgiveness
00:37:15.30\00:37:20.24
because we will hurt each other.
Especially in the marriage
00:37:20.27\00:37:23.54
relationship. And we have
couples who say I would never
00:37:23.57\00:37:26.44
forgive her, I will
never forgive him. But when we
00:37:26.47\00:37:29.78
realize...I've had couples,
people who cheated on each other
00:37:29.81\00:37:34.25
and they have made it through.
And I have one of the best
00:37:34.28\00:37:41.52
stories through this ministry. I
don't want to call the name but
00:37:41.56\00:37:44.76
that person lives in America.
After a very terrible hurt
00:37:44.79\00:37:48.30
recurring pain and guess
what happened. I was teaching in
00:37:48.33\00:37:53.23
Orlando, Florida through that
same ministry and it was about
00:37:53.27\00:37:56.00
forgiveness. And somebody who
divorced their husband two years
00:37:56.04\00:38:00.78
after and God has blessed
us. We have had to remarry seven
00:38:00.81\00:38:05.75
couples. That's perfection.
Ohh! Praise the Lord!
00:38:05.78\00:38:08.55
And I want that to help us to
continue to add more. And this
00:38:08.58\00:38:11.45
couple is not even added to the
list. What the wife said...I was
00:38:11.49\00:38:20.10
teaching on the Hosea story and
I said there will be always a
00:38:20.13\00:38:25.17
Gomer in your life, someone
who does not deserve your love.
00:38:25.20\00:38:28.20
But go and get that person back.
And I was saying some may not
00:38:28.24\00:38:33.71
be the Gomer. It could be go get
your Gomer because that was what
00:38:33.74\00:38:39.95
God did in that story, that
Hosea, to go back for her after
00:38:39.98\00:38:49.69
all she did. And usually, this
is what happens? People pity us
00:38:49.72\00:38:54.10
and say, oh you don't deserve
that, let her go or let him go.
00:38:54.13\00:38:57.33
After all you have done.
That's the vulnerability that is
00:38:57.37\00:39:00.54
needed. And we did the very same
thing to Christ. And God wants
00:39:00.57\00:39:05.31
us to do that and that
person who hurt you that much is
00:39:05.34\00:39:10.38
damaged and in the story of
Jacob and Esau, Esau could only
00:39:10.41\00:39:17.32
forgive when he could see the
brother the way God saw him. You
00:39:17.35\00:39:22.06
need to ask God to help you see
the person as God sees the
person who hurt you
00:39:22.09\00:39:27.06
And how God sees the person
is a damaged person. When Jacob
00:39:27.10\00:39:30.83
could reveal himself as broken.
That's what the angel did when
00:39:30.87\00:39:35.84
that part was broken and he was
walking in a way crippled and he
00:39:35.87\00:39:41.88
said but that man is crippled.
I cannot fight him. So it's the
00:39:41.91\00:39:45.31
same thing. Emotionally you're
dealing with somebody who is
00:39:45.35\00:39:48.08
crippled, somebody with damage.
Somebody who has a handicap.
00:39:48.12\00:39:51.59
So how could you resist that?
You just have to love that and
00:39:51.62\00:39:55.79
accept that. And guess what?
That lady after two years of a
00:39:55.82\00:40:00.80
divorce heard that tape and just
went...Because I have also a
00:40:00.83\00:40:05.13
YouTube channel this is the same
name, Nathanael Gracia, Grace
00:40:05.17\00:40:13.14
Connection...and she was
watching it on YouTube and said
00:40:13.17\00:40:17.45
I have to reconcile. And they
got remarried over. So God has
00:40:17.48\00:40:22.92
has blessed us. We have seven
couples through this ministry
00:40:22.95\00:40:26.09
who were divorced and one
of them for seven years was
00:40:26.12\00:40:29.16
divorced. And then God has
brought us. We conduct seminars
00:40:29.19\00:40:34.50
annually. With COVID that was
different. We are ready. May God
00:40:34.53\00:40:37.23
forgive us for not doing that.
But in person there's something
00:40:37.27\00:40:42.27
and we have one in Georgia, in
Atlanta, Georgia this year and
00:40:42.30\00:40:46.71
it's every year the last week
of October. I've had people who
00:40:46.74\00:40:51.61
came with their divorce paper to
the seminar say since I already
00:40:51.65\00:40:55.92
applied to come I don't want
to lose my money, I came. And at
00:40:55.95\00:40:58.65
the end of the day with
tears on the third day they are
00:40:58.69\00:41:03.19
tearing up in my presence
the divorce papers because they
00:41:03.22\00:41:07.36
realize it was bigger than
the marriage, it was about them,
00:41:07.40\00:41:10.73
about God and them, about them
and their God, their salvation.
00:41:10.77\00:41:16.04
This is what God wants so we
can remove that curse that would
00:41:16.07\00:41:20.81
create that emptiness in
the life of the children. And
00:41:20.84\00:41:24.01
sometimes people say if I'm
suffering I have to be happy.
00:41:24.05\00:41:27.45
Who said you have to be happy?
You need to live with purpose.
00:41:27.48\00:41:32.62
With the meaning, we were
created for holiness. We were
00:41:32.65\00:41:36.26
not created for my own
fulfillment. Show me, somebody
00:41:36.29\00:41:39.36
who is about his own fulfillment
and I will show you somebody who
00:41:39.39\00:41:42.46
is on crack, who is on cocaine,
because I'm fulfilled right
00:41:42.50\00:41:45.80
there. But somebody who will say
I will delay that gratification.
00:41:45.83\00:41:50.57
I will forgive now. Guess what?
You will reap the reward of
00:41:50.61\00:41:55.88
being saved and that peace
that passeth all understanding,
00:41:55.91\00:41:59.88
because you would have missed
heaven because you choose not to
00:41:59.91\00:42:05.35
benefit from that. Because your
own forgiveness has a condition
00:42:05.39\00:42:09.62
and it's so simple. Not
simplistic. I have to let love
00:42:09.66\00:42:14.33
fill my heart. Because we cannot
live without love. And another
00:42:14.36\00:42:18.97
time we'll talk about the power
of love. It's bigger than that
00:42:19.00\00:42:23.91
and the signs of love and
how love also can heal. It's a
00:42:23.94\00:42:28.54
different topic but we'll
talk another time about that.
00:42:28.58\00:42:31.71
This is wonderful. I love
the topic. I love the topic of
00:42:31.75\00:42:36.25
family. You've touched a lot of
bases. I'm not going to go into
00:42:36.28\00:42:40.09
my story but I did have an
experience of a sibling that
00:42:40.12\00:42:45.93
didn't talk to me for 12 years.
But I didn't know why but then
00:42:45.96\00:42:51.47
he got sick and he needed a
kidney. I'm like well I'm an
00:42:51.50\00:42:54.27
organ donor so he can have
my kidney. So lo and behold the
00:42:54.30\00:42:58.74
Lord blessed and you know I said
no strings attached. You can
00:42:58.77\00:43:03.08
have the kidney. So he had the
kidney. So you know we all have
00:43:03.11\00:43:07.75
our own journey. But we not
all seek the help that we need.
00:43:07.78\00:43:12.45
Sometimes it is looked down
to seek some professional help
00:43:12.49\00:43:18.73
to help your marriage. Go to a
counselor. Oh, we're Christian.
00:43:18.76\00:43:22.43
We're not going to go to a
counselor. Go to a psychiatrist
00:43:22.46\00:43:24.13
or go somewhere. Get the help
that you need and a lot of times
00:43:24.17\00:43:28.37
we damper it and we put it
on the side and say Oh yeah, we
00:43:28.40\00:43:32.74
forgave each other. But again
for the next meal you slap the
00:43:32.77\00:43:36.31
slab of problems on the platter
you're serving your husband.
00:43:36.34\00:43:39.78
Everything he's done or the wife
everything she's done and you
00:43:39.81\00:43:45.72
just keep going back like you
know and not getting past that.
00:43:45.75\00:43:51.66
So that is also a problem that
we face as human beings. So the
00:43:51.69\00:43:57.00
healing needs to come and it has
to be total because the past is
00:43:57.03\00:44:00.70
the past. You cannot have
this for a snack or dessert on a
00:44:00.74\00:44:04.61
future day. I mean I'm not the
expert but you know that's what
00:44:04.64\00:44:08.11
I'm thinking.
00:44:08.14\00:44:09.48
You're right about that. We have
to take action and that action
00:44:09.51\00:44:13.11
needs the power of the
Holy Spirit because of the
00:44:13.15\00:44:16.62
knowledge... Knowledge is not
wisdom. It's knowledge applied
00:44:16.65\00:44:21.26
that is wisdom If I don't apply
it I'm not wise and I went and
00:44:21.29\00:44:26.43
studied psychology. I got a
masters degree in counseling
00:44:26.46\00:44:29.30
psychology with family therapy
just to heal the wounds like my
00:44:29.33\00:44:33.34
mom that I love dearly. And 3ABN
did a tribute for my mother two
00:44:33.37\00:44:38.71
years ago the whole network and
I'm so grateful for that. My mom
00:44:38.74\00:44:41.98
passed. I love her so much but
when I was growing up I became
00:44:42.01\00:44:46.65
at the age of eight and nine a
counselor for my mom because she
00:44:46.68\00:44:51.25
was so much in pain. The pain
that my father had inflicted
00:44:51.29\00:44:54.82
through the divorce and how
things went and then I developed
00:44:54.86\00:44:59.43
that and then I went to study
just to know how to deal with it
00:44:59.46\00:45:03.06
But it did not help.
The knowledge did not help
00:45:03.10\00:45:05.83
You need a person. That person
is Jesus. And how that person
00:45:05.87\00:45:09.70
can be in your heart to teach
you is through the Holy Spirit.
00:45:09.74\00:45:12.71
The Holy Spirit taught
me because Jesus is love.
00:45:12.74\00:45:17.78
Definitely, it's love incarnate.
When you have Christ in your
00:45:17.81\00:45:21.05
heart through the Holy Spirit
you can do it. I can do all
00:45:21.08\00:45:23.89
things through Christ who
strengthens me and we doubt Him
00:45:23.92\00:45:27.72
We may have the knowledge but
we will still have conflict, we
00:45:27.76\00:45:32.13
will still do the wrong thing
but with Jesus in our hearts
00:45:32.16\00:45:37.77
it's possible. I'm saying to you
I'm saying to you it's possible.
00:45:37.80\00:45:43.61
You can forgive, you can love
again, you can reconcile unless
00:45:43.64\00:45:47.84
the curse come.
May love be with you.
00:45:47.88\00:45:50.98
Amen, amen. Thank you, Dr.
Nathanael Gracia. He is the
00:45:51.01\00:45:57.19
founder of Grace Connection
Family Ministry and we're going
00:45:57.22\00:46:01.12
take a break. We're going to
share the contact information
00:46:01.16\00:46:04.66
for his office for his ministry,
your ministry. You can recommend
00:46:04.69\00:46:10.03
for your friends to visit that
website. If you know a family
00:46:10.07\00:46:14.27
that is struggling and can
use some help or maybe you're
00:46:14.30\00:46:19.67
interested in inviting
Dr. Gracia to your community
00:46:19.71\00:46:22.34
It doesn't have to be a church,
right? It could be a theater
00:46:22.38\00:46:25.28
somewhere and have the whole
community come and be blessed.
00:46:25.31\00:46:30.09
Because many people are hurting
and we want to present Jesus'
00:46:30.12\00:46:36.36
love, the Healer, and the Maker.
So I hope you have something to
00:46:36.39\00:46:41.86
write with. If not, like my
husband, John Dinzey says just
00:46:41.90\00:46:45.17
take a picture of the screen and
that way you have the contact
00:46:45.20\00:46:49.44
information and you will not
lose it. So Dr. Nathanael Gracia
00:46:49.47\00:46:54.68
He is available for seminars
anywhere in the world. So,
00:46:54.71\00:47:00.08
please make note of that and
have him in mind... presented to
00:47:00.12\00:47:03.85
your church board, so you can
have him in your community. We
00:47:03.89\00:47:08.42
will be right back.
00:47:08.46\00:47:10.16
If you would like to contact or
know more about Grace Connection
00:47:10.19\00:47:13.16
You can do so in the following
ways: You can write to them at
00:47:13.19\00:47:16.60
1301 Shale Way, McDonough,
GA 30253. You can call them at
00:47:16.63\00:47:24.77
678-558-5061 You can
visit their website at
00:47:24.81\00:47:36.92
GraceConnectionFamily.org
or send them an email at
00:47:36.95\00:47:45.29
NathanaelGracia@gmail.com
00:47:45.33\00:47:51.27