I want to spend my life
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Mending broken people
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I want to spend my life
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Removing pain
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Lord, let my words
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Heal a heart that hurts
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I want to spend my life
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Mending broken people
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I want to spend my life
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Mending broken people
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Hello, and
welcome to 3ABN Today.
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And I'm here with my
co-host... All right.
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Danny Shelton, my husband.
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And we are just
so happy to be here.
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I'm so excited. Oh, absolutely.
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I'm super excited.
Nothing like having family.
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I know it. I know it.
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My family is here today.
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And so actually I always prefer
for Danny to be in this seat
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and for me to be
in the co-host seat,
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but he wanted me
to be in the seat.
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I took a back seat today
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'cause, you know,
who knows more about
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family than family, right?
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Well, that's true. That's true.
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And I get to introduce
my family to you because...
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Well, let me just
introduce them first,
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and then I'll
tell you about them.
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So this is my
aunt Jocelyn Thomas,
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my uncle Claude Thomas,
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and my cousin Pattie Conwell,
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Pattie Thomas
Conwell, their daughter.
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And my whole life...
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there are certain
couples that just stand out,
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there are certain
couples that you just say,
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"You know what?
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When I get married, I
want a marriage like that."
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And that's what
all of my friends
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and all of our
family thinks about
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Uncle Jackie and Aunt Joe.
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Oh, the Lord be
praised. Lord be praised.
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Well, it's so
obvious that the Lord
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is at the center
of your relationship,
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and today, we're
going to talk about
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the relationship that they have,
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and how they got there,
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and the book that they
have that Pattie has written
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that they've written together.
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So we're just going to look at
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what goes into a
really solid relationship.
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There are people out
here who are really hurting
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because they
don't know how to have
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a good, strong relationship.
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And I know no better couple
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to tell us about
that than you two.
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The old saying
says, "Pray church."
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Yeah. Right.
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So we want to talk
about how you guys met,
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and we actually
have a little clip
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that we're going to show in
just a second on how you met
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because it's important to
just set the foundation here,
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how did you guys get
together, so let's take a look.
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I was the youth
leader for the church
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in Buffalo, New York,
where dad was the pastor.
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I was working in New
York as a public health nurse,
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but I was also the youth leader,
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and my friend Pearl was there.
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I heard about Claude,
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and we had a lot of fun
talking about the possibility
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that he might be somebody
that we would be interested,
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and I would be interested in.
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And so we decided to go,
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and we decided
to go looking good.
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She was single,
and I was single,
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and we said, "We're going
to go with our catch 'em suits.
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My Aunt Thelma and Uncle
called me, "Why don't you go?"
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And I was not
particular about it.
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I wasn't going to go.
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But it was too recent for me.
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Then I knew a lot of people
who were going to be there,
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we'll have you there,
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I wouldn't
know, and all of that.
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So I didn't want to
answer a whole lot of questions
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or hang on a whole
lot of condolences.
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So I made my
mind, I wasn't going,
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but my chaplain wanted to go.
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He was a kid too eager to go.
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Then I finally said, "Okay."
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Then I drove him down.
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Jackie had married
his teen heartthrob
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Carol Laverne
Jones in September, 1953.
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Tragically, she passed
away on October 23, 1964,
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leaving him and three children,
Jackie Jr., 10 years old,
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Brian, 7 years old,
and Pattie, 3 years old.
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Family members of Joe felt
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Jackie made a
good catch for Joe.
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So the plan was to
introduce them to each other
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during Youth Congress.
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So that Sabbath evening,
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one of my classmates was doing
a concert there at the hall,
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and I still had on
my outfit from Sabbath.
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And I found myself
walking down the hall,
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down one of the
aisles of the auditorium,
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and Robert's
aunt, we called her...
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Aunt Francis.
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Aunt Francis, she saw me,
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and she said, "Oh,
Joe, have you met Jackie?"
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I said, "No, dear."
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And she grabbed my hand
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and snatched me with great zeal.
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And she starts marching
me to wherever you were.
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And on the way to
wherever you were sitting,
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"Joe, now this is a man
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that's going to
be your husband."
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That was the voice that said
to me clearly, out of the blue.
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It wasn't a startling effect,
no one else heard it but I did.
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And so I went
on to meet the man.
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And Aunt Francis ran up,
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"Jackie, I have
somebody I want you to meet."
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And when he got
up, he stepped back.
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Beautiful young lady there
on dressed in red bow hair,
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and black
patterned leather shoes,
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beautiful hat, black hat.
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And that's it?
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Pretty much.
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They went their separate ways
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and back to
their separate lives.
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But obviously,
it didn't end there.
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Oh, no.
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That video was
so nice, wasn't it?
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Absolutely.
Where do you come from?
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Where did you guys...
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Well, Pattie and her brothers,
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well, Pattie's
really the lead person here,
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put together a 50th wedding
anniversary celebration for us.
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So she went
through all our pictures
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and just put
everything together.
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It was really well done.
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And that's how
it all came about.
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Wow.
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Putting this picture
together for everyone,
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our friends to see.
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You know, I remember
when after Aunt Carol died,
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she had left three children,
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and watching that
brought tears to my eyes
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because you
stepped into a situation
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that was really a difficult
situation to step into.
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A preexisting family,
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and you had never had
any children of your own,
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and you stepped in as their mom,
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as really as their mom.
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What was going on in your
mind about then, Aunt Joe?
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Oh, really, very
interesting thing is
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when God does something,
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everything
fits, everything fits.
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Ever since I was a little
girl, I've been working...
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Let's go back when
I was 11 years old,
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my dad was a pastor.
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Of course, his wife,
my mom, worked with him.
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And I worked in the
credit roll division.
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I taught this
credit rolls children.
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I was always around children,
and I always loved children.
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I had a lot of teddy
bears and stuffed animals
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because they were my children.
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In fact, when I first
heard of Uncle Jackie,
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and someone mentioned,
"You know, there's a young man,
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his wife died,
blah, blah, blah."
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I said, "No, that
wouldn't be for me
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because I want to
start from scratch.
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Honey and me and
then baby makes three,
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so that was
just the bottom line.
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That's not what God had in mind.
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But when he
introduced me to this man,
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it was just an automatic thing.
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Everything just
went into play. Wow.
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And then, of
course, our daughter,
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she was the
first one to say that,
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"That's our new mommy."
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Aw. She just...
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It's amazing when
you hear the story
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how the Lord had
really put things together.
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And our oldest son said that,
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you know, he's
always been older in mind,
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we tease him and
call him "the old man".
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But he said,
"Daddy needs a wife."
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"Knowing he's a man,
and he needs a wife,"
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that's what our son
said, that the baby says.
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And what did Brian call you?
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Pattie said,
"That's our new mommy."
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And Brain said...
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Brian was the one that held out.
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And he is the middle one.
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He is the middle one,
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and I always
tell him he's special.
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I hugged him
before we came up here,
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and I said, "Brian,
you know you're special
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because daddy had told them
that he wouldn't marry anyone
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unless they, the three children,
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agree to it,
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so, and he told me, he said,
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"Joe, if the
children don't agree,
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you know, we will not
be able to get married."
00:09:58.63\00:10:01.06
So when Brian...
00:10:01.10\00:10:03.73
Brian held out
on that whole thing.
00:10:03.77\00:10:07.04
The two, the older and
the youngest, were with it,
00:10:07.07\00:10:10.97
the middle boy said, "Okay, I'm
going to check this out, so..."
00:10:11.01\00:10:15.61
See, Pattie was
really answering Brian.
00:10:15.64\00:10:18.41
Brian said, "Is that
your new girlfriend?"
00:10:18.45\00:10:22.02
Pattie said, "No,
that's our new mommy."
00:10:22.05\00:10:25.69
And then we went to
the new... Psychics.
00:10:25.72\00:10:27.49
To the World's Fair in New York,
00:10:27.52\00:10:29.36
and Brian walked up to us,
00:10:29.39\00:10:33.29
daddy and I were
sitting on a bench,
00:10:33.33\00:10:34.86
he said, "It's okay, Daddy,
00:10:34.90\00:10:37.00
you can go ahead
and get married."
00:10:37.03\00:10:38.37
What? After how long?
00:10:38.40\00:10:39.80
Oh, we'd been what?
00:10:39.83\00:10:42.27
It was just six
months before we got married
00:10:42.30\00:10:44.31
when we first met
to when we got married,
00:10:44.34\00:10:45.94
it was just six months.
00:10:45.97\00:10:47.31
So it was in
between there somewhere.
00:10:47.34\00:10:48.98
Wow.
00:10:49.01\00:10:50.35
Uncle Jackie,
what were you thinking?
00:10:50.38\00:10:52.11
What were you thinking
when you first met Aunt Joe?
00:10:52.15\00:10:55.08
What were you thinking?
00:10:55.12\00:10:56.45
Oh, how fine she was.
00:10:59.79\00:11:03.32
That's through his eye.
That's through his eyes, folks.
00:11:07.63\00:11:10.83
Absolutely.
00:11:10.87\00:11:13.64
It drummed up all my
manners, and I stood up.
00:11:13.67\00:11:19.47
Oh, yes, he did.
00:11:19.51\00:11:20.98
And I said, "Hello..."
00:11:21.01\00:11:23.38
Oh, he had a deep
voice, "Well, hello."
00:11:23.41\00:11:28.12
She dramatizes it.
00:11:28.15\00:11:30.12
That's the way it came across.
00:11:30.15\00:11:34.22
And I was sitting there
with a young lady that I knew.
00:11:34.26\00:11:40.66
And I had really kind of
come to this thing with you...
00:11:40.70\00:11:45.67
'cause I met her as soon as
we got into the city and all.
00:11:48.67\00:11:53.24
And I asked her
to come sit with us.
00:11:53.27\00:11:57.05
But once we met... Who met?
00:11:57.08\00:12:01.78
My aunt took over,
once, Joe and I met.
00:12:01.82\00:12:03.95
Okay, yeah. Oh, I see.
00:12:03.99\00:12:05.92
When I came up on the scene,
00:12:05.95\00:12:07.29
he is with this
lovely young lady,
00:12:07.32\00:12:09.22
I don't know
anything, so it doesn't...
00:12:09.26\00:12:11.63
Yeah, I'm not
startled or being concerned.
00:12:11.66\00:12:14.66
But then Aunt Thelma
came along and took the girl.
00:12:14.70\00:12:18.73
Moved her out. And
took her, just moved.
00:12:18.77\00:12:20.94
Moved her away.
00:12:20.97\00:12:22.30
Aunt Thelma is his aunt.
00:12:22.34\00:12:24.21
It's like his... It
is his mother's sister.
00:12:24.24\00:12:26.98
She was his mother's sister.
00:12:27.01\00:12:28.54
My mother died early.
00:12:28.58\00:12:30.05
Yeah, so I mean she
loved this boy here.
00:12:30.08\00:12:33.55
Oh, yes. I know that. She loved.
00:12:33.58\00:12:34.92
Aunt Thelma loved him,
00:12:34.95\00:12:36.28
so she's going to
take care of business.
00:12:36.32\00:12:37.65
Okay.
00:12:37.69\00:12:39.02
So how quickly, Aunt
Joe, just before she met you,
00:12:39.05\00:12:43.99
the Lord spoke to her and said,
00:12:44.03\00:12:45.36
"This is going
to be your husband."
00:12:45.39\00:12:46.80
How far after meeting her,
how long after meeting her,
00:12:46.83\00:12:50.40
did you have
that same impression
00:12:50.43\00:12:53.17
that she was going be your wife?
00:12:53.20\00:12:55.00
When we left each other.
00:12:55.04\00:12:58.51
From that weekend?
00:12:58.54\00:12:59.87
After that meeting, we
were there for Youth Congress.
00:12:59.91\00:13:03.31
And then we had
dispersed, gone home.
00:13:03.35\00:13:05.31
I went to Buffalo,
and he went to New York.
00:13:05.35\00:13:08.05
And when I got home,
00:13:08.08\00:13:12.05
I just couldn't
get her out of my mind.
00:13:12.09\00:13:16.06
And that whole
weekend, I just...
00:13:16.09\00:13:19.13
So I finally called
and talked to her parents.
00:13:19.16\00:13:24.87
I wasn't there yet
00:13:24.90\00:13:26.23
because I
hadn't gotten home yet.
00:13:26.27\00:13:27.60
She hadn't gotten, or
she had gone to take back
00:13:27.64\00:13:29.64
the young people she
had brought to that meeting.
00:13:29.67\00:13:32.24
Youth Congress.
00:13:32.27\00:13:34.21
And I enquired
about her and all,
00:13:34.24\00:13:37.61
and they had been told by her,
00:13:37.65\00:13:43.02
"What was to be,
and this is my...
00:13:43.05\00:13:46.15
I met the man
I'm going to marry."
00:13:46.19\00:13:47.72
Yeah, I called we
were... So they were aware.
00:13:47.76\00:13:49.16
Yeah, right.
00:13:49.19\00:13:50.53
I called my parents,
00:13:50.56\00:13:51.89
at the hotel we were
both at the same meeting,
00:13:51.93\00:13:53.93
and said, "I met the
man I'm going to marry."
00:13:53.96\00:13:55.73
They said, "What?"
00:13:55.76\00:13:57.37
You know, and...
00:13:57.40\00:13:58.73
So when I called,
they were ready for me.
00:13:58.77\00:14:02.27
Telling you had children.
00:14:02.30\00:14:04.27
No, but see, the
interesting thing is, Danny,
00:14:04.31\00:14:06.91
that this man was on
the conference committee
00:14:06.94\00:14:10.28
with my father.
00:14:10.31\00:14:11.75
Oh, okay.
00:14:11.78\00:14:13.11
So they knew each other.
00:14:13.15\00:14:14.48
Okay, all right.
00:14:14.52\00:14:15.85
And so that
everything was in place.
00:14:15.88\00:14:20.72
Everything was in place.
00:14:20.76\00:14:22.62
So when I got to the house,
00:14:22.66\00:14:25.73
mom and dad told me
about Jackie called,
00:14:25.76\00:14:27.96
I said, "Oh, okay."
00:14:28.00\00:14:30.40
I didn't think anymore about it.
00:14:30.43\00:14:32.23
I was expecting
him to call me back
00:14:32.27\00:14:34.60
'cause he didn't
get me the first time
00:14:34.64\00:14:36.54
when he never called.
00:14:36.57\00:14:38.51
So I'm sitting there,
waiting for him to call,
00:14:38.54\00:14:40.18
and he's sitting there
waiting for me to call.
00:14:40.21\00:14:43.61
The first argument we had.
00:14:43.65\00:14:45.08
The first argument.
00:14:45.11\00:14:46.51
To this day, we still...
00:14:46.55\00:14:47.95
It's still a little fresh. Yeah.
00:14:47.98\00:14:51.42
Because I told
him, "I don't call men."
00:14:51.45\00:14:54.36
You know, I try to tell
women, "You are the prize.
00:14:54.39\00:14:57.36
You're it."
00:14:57.39\00:14:59.19
And that's the
object of their goal
00:14:59.23\00:15:01.83
is to find this prize,
00:15:01.86\00:15:03.83
this diamond.
00:15:03.87\00:15:05.80
So I was waiting for
him to call the diamond.
00:15:05.83\00:15:11.21
Because I had told them,
00:15:11.24\00:15:13.98
"Be sure and tell
her that I called."
00:15:14.01\00:15:16.34
I didn't know his name.
00:15:16.38\00:15:18.28
All I knew was Jackie, and
you know that's a nickname.
00:15:18.31\00:15:20.55
Right. I didn't
know his phone number.
00:15:20.58\00:15:22.68
We didn't have those kind
of phones like we have today.
00:15:22.72\00:15:24.69
Right.
00:15:24.72\00:15:26.05
With the numbers left...
I didn't have any of that.
00:15:26.09\00:15:28.52
So, you know, then
what was interesting,
00:15:28.56\00:15:31.39
that was in April,
00:15:31.43\00:15:34.00
that was the
end of April, honey?
00:15:34.03\00:15:36.06
The end of April? It
was beginning of spring.
00:15:36.10\00:15:38.83
Right.
00:15:38.87\00:15:40.20
So a camp meeting was coming
up for Northeastern in New York,
00:15:40.24\00:15:43.14
and my
girlfriend said, "Let's go."
00:15:43.17\00:15:46.51
My parents said,
"We'll take you."
00:15:46.54\00:15:47.88
I said, "No, I'm not
going. I might see him.
00:15:47.91\00:15:49.74
He might think
I'm running after him.
00:15:49.78\00:15:51.18
I'm not going."
00:15:51.21\00:15:53.65
And I would not
go to camp meeting
00:15:53.68\00:15:55.22
knowing that he
was going to be there.
00:15:55.25\00:15:58.29
So you guys didn't even connect.
00:15:58.32\00:15:59.65
'Cause we didn't... He didn't...
00:15:59.69\00:16:01.46
After he made the call,
00:16:01.49\00:16:02.82
and my parents
answered the phone,
00:16:02.86\00:16:04.83
I never heard from him again,
00:16:04.86\00:16:09.53
but I knew God had
told me, "This is the man."
00:16:09.56\00:16:11.27
So this is not for me
to be involved with, so.
00:16:11.30\00:16:15.24
But once I had made the call...
00:16:15.27\00:16:17.31
This is our
argument. This is our argument.
00:16:17.34\00:16:18.87
Once I had made the call...
00:16:18.91\00:16:20.64
I'm with you right now.
00:16:20.68\00:16:22.41
I know you know,
Uncle Jackie, I'm with you.
00:16:22.44\00:16:24.51
And I said, "Be sure
and tell her that I called."
00:16:24.55\00:16:29.08
You know, and then
after I didn't hear anything.
00:16:29.12\00:16:32.82
And my mind
started working and I said,
00:16:32.85\00:16:35.26
"Now what would she want
00:16:35.29\00:16:37.29
with a man with three children?"
00:16:37.33\00:16:39.53
So he is beginning
to doubt himself now.
00:16:39.56\00:16:42.06
I went through
all of that. Okay.
00:16:42.10\00:16:44.47
You know, I said,
"She wouldn't want to...
00:16:44.50\00:16:46.37
She's never been married."
00:16:46.40\00:16:47.74
So, yeah, we got to find out,
00:16:47.77\00:16:49.10
so what finally made the change?
00:16:49.14\00:16:50.61
Where did you
see each other next?
00:16:50.64\00:16:52.57
My father... Who called who?
00:16:52.61\00:16:54.11
So camp meeting comes up.
00:16:54.14\00:16:56.48
I didn't go because I
didn't want to seem forward,
00:16:56.51\00:16:59.28
that's the word I
think I want to use.
00:16:59.31\00:17:00.95
That's my make up. Okay.
00:17:00.98\00:17:03.99
So my daddy sees him, my
daddy is West Indian, okay.
00:17:04.02\00:17:08.92
Was a very strong
presentation of himself.
00:17:08.96\00:17:13.46
Okay.
00:17:13.50\00:17:14.83
"Young man,
what happened to you?
00:17:14.86\00:17:19.40
We didn't hear
anymore from you."
00:17:19.43\00:17:22.47
And after that,
letters started coming.
00:17:22.50\00:17:24.77
Without letting me notice,
she was still interested.
00:17:24.81\00:17:27.28
And the family
was still interested.
00:17:27.31\00:17:29.51
So I called her. All right.
00:17:29.54\00:17:31.91
And the rest is history.
00:17:31.95\00:17:33.35
And invited her... Oh, my.
00:17:33.38\00:17:36.08
To another camp meeting,
the Pine Forge camp meeting.
00:17:36.12\00:17:39.25
Okay. Allegheny East.
00:17:39.29\00:17:40.92
And that I would drive up and...
00:17:40.96\00:17:43.73
Pick her up. Pick her up...
00:17:43.76\00:17:45.09
And let me drive on up.
00:17:45.13\00:17:46.46
Drive to the new camp meeting.
00:17:46.49\00:17:47.90
Now, Yvonne, you know,
I come from old-timers.
00:17:47.93\00:17:51.83
My mom said, "I don't
think that will be good, Joe.
00:17:51.87\00:17:54.24
Why don't you invite
him to come to Buffalo."
00:17:54.27\00:17:56.81
That's where we lived. Right.
00:17:56.84\00:17:58.17
"So why don't you have him
come and spend a week with us."
00:17:58.21\00:18:01.58
That's what we did. Okay.
00:18:01.61\00:18:03.04
You know, it's very good, Danny,
00:18:03.08\00:18:04.75
to listen to godly parents.
00:18:04.78\00:18:09.22
In today's climate, I
don't know that young people,
00:18:09.25\00:18:11.92
they would say,
"They're old-timer..."
00:18:11.95\00:18:13.56
But there's good
wisdom in listening to those
00:18:13.59\00:18:17.69
who've been here before.
00:18:17.73\00:18:19.06
Absolutely.
00:18:19.09\00:18:20.43
So we didn't go, he
came to Buffalo where I was.
00:18:20.46\00:18:23.20
We had the best of times.
00:18:23.23\00:18:25.43
And the thing of it is,
when he came to Buffalo,
00:18:25.47\00:18:28.70
everything clicked.
00:18:28.74\00:18:32.01
Where were we in weekend?
00:18:32.04\00:18:33.38
I'm telling you that we
went to church that Sabbath,
00:18:33.41\00:18:36.41
I was so proud to
have him on my arm.
00:18:36.44\00:18:38.58
You know, my arm on his
arm to go in the church...
00:18:38.61\00:18:41.65
And everybody
see me with this man.
00:18:41.68\00:18:44.15
And it's important to know that
00:18:44.19\00:18:45.52
this is only the second
time they'd seen each other.
00:18:45.55\00:18:47.66
Right. Right, that is important.
00:18:47.69\00:18:49.29
The second time, they
were seeing each other.
00:18:49.32\00:18:51.39
And he had to
leave Saturday night,
00:18:51.43\00:18:54.93
he came on a bus,
00:18:54.96\00:18:56.30
he was going to take a bus back.
00:18:56.33\00:18:57.73
And so we were
sitting down in my parent's...
00:18:57.77\00:19:00.64
I lived with my
parents until I got married.
00:19:00.67\00:19:03.20
Folks would say, "You
live with your parents?
00:19:03.24\00:19:05.44
You were grown and work..."
00:19:05.47\00:19:06.81
I said, "Yes, I
live with my parents.
00:19:06.84\00:19:09.24
And I love my parents."
00:19:09.28\00:19:11.85
Actually, I left on Sunday.
00:19:11.88\00:19:13.62
Okay, was it Sunday?
00:19:13.65\00:19:14.98
That was Sunday. Saturday night.
00:19:15.02\00:19:16.35
Oh, Saturday night, okay.
00:19:16.38\00:19:17.72
But Saturday
night, I'm sitting...
00:19:17.75\00:19:19.09
Was it Sunday night we
were talking in the living room
00:19:19.12\00:19:20.46
when daddy came in the midst?
00:19:20.49\00:19:22.32
Yeah, it was Saturday.
00:19:22.36\00:19:25.13
We went to Niagara Falls. Okay.
00:19:25.16\00:19:28.46
And we, on the way
there and back to her house,
00:19:28.50\00:19:34.24
I guess we
talked about everything.
00:19:34.27\00:19:35.80
Everything, the
children, life, marriage,
00:19:35.84\00:19:39.34
everything that you would
00:19:39.37\00:19:40.84
need to talk about
before you get married.
00:19:40.88\00:19:42.58
Philosophy of life. Yeah.
00:19:42.61\00:19:44.95
From A to Z. Yeah.
00:19:44.98\00:19:46.38
So you spent hours
just talking about life?
00:19:46.41\00:19:49.15
That Saturday night, we talked
for about three, four hours,
00:19:49.18\00:19:54.16
we came back, and
then the next Sunday,
00:19:54.19\00:19:57.09
we were talking again.
00:19:57.13\00:19:59.16
And, in fact, we were sitting
in my parent's living room
00:19:59.19\00:20:05.63
just talking about...
00:20:05.67\00:20:07.10
He was getting close to
saying, "Will you marry me?"
00:20:07.14\00:20:09.10
And my dad comes
down from upstairs...
00:20:09.14\00:20:12.97
Talk about timing.
00:20:13.01\00:20:14.34
And sits right
in the midst of us.
00:20:14.38\00:20:15.71
"Well, all
right, how're we doing?"
00:20:15.74\00:20:19.18
But I have a very smart mother,
00:20:19.21\00:20:22.38
mother said,
"Honey, I need you to come
00:20:22.42\00:20:24.89
upstairs a minute, dear."
00:20:24.92\00:20:27.52
She took him out of the way.
00:20:27.56\00:20:28.89
Oh, good, good.
00:20:28.92\00:20:30.26
Took daddy out of the
mix, and life went on,
00:20:30.29\00:20:33.23
you know, and then...
00:20:33.26\00:20:34.60
I gave her a few more
nuggets to think about,
00:20:34.63\00:20:37.47
you know, not like I'm
going to stop, go ahead.
00:20:37.50\00:20:39.77
Yeah, you were
going, getting ready
00:20:39.80\00:20:41.20
to take the bus to go back,
00:20:41.24\00:20:42.94
and I was in the
kitchen fixing a lunch
00:20:42.97\00:20:44.67
for my husband to take...
00:20:44.71\00:20:46.34
Your future husband.
00:20:46.37\00:20:47.71
Yeah, for my...
00:20:47.74\00:20:49.64
Intended. For my intended.
00:20:49.68\00:20:51.01
Intended, right.
00:20:51.05\00:20:52.38
My God given
gift. God given gift.
00:20:52.41\00:20:54.82
And my mother walked by
00:20:54.85\00:20:56.22
'cause where I was standing here
00:20:56.25\00:20:57.89
fixing the sandwich over
there in the living room,
00:20:57.92\00:21:01.09
you could kind of see in,
00:21:01.12\00:21:02.46
and my husband
was sitting there,
00:21:02.49\00:21:03.83
but she didn't want him to hear.
00:21:03.86\00:21:05.26
So she said to him...
00:21:05.29\00:21:07.46
She came by and said to me,
00:21:07.50\00:21:08.83
"Why don't you
put a little letter?
00:21:08.86\00:21:10.33
Put a little
letter in that lunch."
00:21:10.37\00:21:12.87
I said, "Wow, Mom,
that is really sharp.
00:21:12.90\00:21:15.57
That's cool."
00:21:15.60\00:21:18.57
So I wrote him a nice
letter, put it in the lunch,
00:21:18.61\00:21:21.08
and he said he
opened it down the road
00:21:21.11\00:21:23.28
when he got ready
to eat your lunch.
00:21:23.31\00:21:24.65
Good reading. Good reading.
00:21:24.68\00:21:27.62
And the rest...
Well, he asked me...
00:21:27.65\00:21:29.02
Whoa, I drove him
to the bus station,
00:21:29.05\00:21:32.45
and the bus was supposed
to leave at 12 midnight.
00:21:32.49\00:21:36.42
And he was talking about,
00:21:36.46\00:21:38.06
you know, "It's so much easier
00:21:38.09\00:21:40.36
if two people
live in the same home."
00:21:40.40\00:21:44.10
He was going around the
bush to say will you marry me.
00:21:44.13\00:21:47.27
So he had to hurry because
the bus is about to leave...
00:21:47.30\00:21:50.07
So he finally said,
"Would you marry me?"
00:21:50.11\00:21:53.07
And how did you put it, Jackie?
00:21:53.11\00:21:54.51
'Cause you didn't say
it right. I don't remember.
00:21:54.54\00:21:55.88
I don't remember.
00:21:55.91\00:21:57.25
And, of course...
But it was a second date.
00:21:57.28\00:21:58.81
It was our second
date, and I said yes.
00:21:58.85\00:22:00.72
Okay on a second date.
And we had never kissed.
00:22:00.75\00:22:04.29
But when I said yes, we kissed.
00:22:04.32\00:22:08.86
Okay.
00:22:08.89\00:22:10.36
And the next time I saw
him, was it our wedding?
00:22:10.39\00:22:13.76
No, when I got
home. To New York.
00:22:13.80\00:22:18.30
In New York,
00:22:18.33\00:22:20.67
my brother came to pick me up
00:22:20.70\00:22:27.18
and asked me about
the trip, "How was it?"
00:22:27.21\00:22:30.68
I said, "Fine."
00:22:30.71\00:22:34.02
And when I told him,
00:22:34.05\00:22:35.38
that's a second
time I'd just seen her.
00:22:35.42\00:22:37.32
Right.
00:22:37.35\00:22:39.89
"I asked her to marry me."
00:22:39.92\00:22:41.26
He said, "What?
00:22:41.29\00:22:42.62
You did what?"
00:22:45.89\00:22:49.40
Total disbelief.
00:22:49.43\00:22:51.97
And I said, "I don't know, man.
00:22:52.00\00:22:55.44
I can't explain it to you.
00:22:55.47\00:22:58.11
It just happened."
00:22:58.14\00:22:59.74
Well, see, you had to
remember God told us, told me,
00:22:59.77\00:23:04.91
well, before
that, Yvonne and Danny,
00:23:04.95\00:23:06.92
I had told the
Lord if I get married
00:23:06.95\00:23:10.15
because a lot of
women don't get to marry,
00:23:10.19\00:23:12.15
there're just not
suitable men to marry,
00:23:12.19\00:23:14.16
and there's a shortage of men.
00:23:14.19\00:23:16.29
So I said, "Lord,
if I'm to get married,
00:23:16.32\00:23:17.93
you be the one, I
give you permission."
00:23:17.96\00:23:19.69
Can you imagine me
giving God permission
00:23:19.73\00:23:22.93
to choose my husband?
00:23:22.96\00:23:24.30
Because He says,
"He will not force us."
00:23:24.33\00:23:28.17
He offers us salvation,
00:23:28.20\00:23:30.57
but He does not force it on you.
00:23:30.61\00:23:32.94
So I took Him at
His word, and I said,
00:23:32.97\00:23:35.18
"Lord, You'll be
the one to choose for me
00:23:35.21\00:23:37.08
because I want
this to be right."
00:23:37.11\00:23:38.45
That's good.
00:23:38.48\00:23:39.81
I think we have a
video of your wedding.
00:23:39.85\00:23:41.88
I think we want to show
a bit of that in a second
00:23:41.92\00:23:45.92
because, you
guys, after six months,
00:23:45.95\00:23:50.46
six months you were married.
00:23:50.49\00:23:52.99
Married. Six months.
00:23:53.03\00:23:54.36
Let's take a look at the video.
00:23:54.40\00:23:56.63
Tell us what's going on here?
00:23:56.67\00:23:59.57
Okay, I can't see,
that's daddy is singing to me.
00:23:59.60\00:24:03.57
I've come down the aisle,
and he is now singing to me.
00:24:03.61\00:24:06.68
Oh, ain't that sweet?
00:24:06.71\00:24:08.18
And then little
Brian sang his heart out.
00:24:08.21\00:24:10.85
He sang the Lord's prayer.
00:24:10.88\00:24:13.58
He was so precious.
00:24:13.62\00:24:16.25
Pattie was in the wedding.
00:24:16.28\00:24:19.99
That's so sweet.
00:24:20.02\00:24:21.69
The three children
were in the wedding,
00:24:21.72\00:24:24.36
of course, part of the wedding.
00:24:24.39\00:24:25.73
We had five,
00:24:25.76\00:24:27.43
or was it six little
bridesmaids and little...
00:24:27.46\00:24:33.03
Flower girl and...
And then the grown up.
00:24:33.07\00:24:35.14
Junior groom and
junior bridesmaids.
00:24:35.17\00:24:37.21
Right.
00:24:37.24\00:24:38.57
So it was just precious.
00:24:38.61\00:24:40.81
So he is singing to me,
00:24:40.84\00:24:42.18
and I'm looking
straight in his eyes.
00:24:42.21\00:24:45.61
And there they
are. There's the group.
00:24:45.65\00:24:47.92
Yeah. The wedding is over.
00:24:47.95\00:24:49.65
With these hands.
00:24:49.68\00:24:51.02
And the children think
they're going on the honeymoon.
00:24:51.05\00:24:54.19
So they all look very
sad. They've found out.
00:24:54.22\00:24:58.43
They found out
that they weren't going.
00:24:58.46\00:25:00.63
But when we got
back to the house
00:25:00.66\00:25:02.40
after the reception,
00:25:02.43\00:25:06.30
Pattie held on to my hand.
00:25:06.33\00:25:09.60
She was going.
00:25:09.64\00:25:11.14
That's bottom,
she is going. Right.
00:25:11.17\00:25:13.24
They had to pull her
away, and it broke our hearts,
00:25:13.27\00:25:15.84
just broke my heart.
00:25:15.88\00:25:17.21
Yes. You know.
00:25:17.25\00:25:18.58
So Pattie
attached to you very early.
00:25:18.61\00:25:20.32
Right away.
00:25:20.35\00:25:21.68
Yes. Right away.
00:25:21.72\00:25:23.42
Yvonne and Danny, when
God's in it, it's perfect.
00:25:23.45\00:25:26.65
That's just the
bottom line. That's true.
00:25:26.69\00:25:28.36
It doesn't mean
you're not going to have
00:25:28.39\00:25:29.72
problems and situations,
00:25:29.76\00:25:31.26
but God is, that's who He is,
00:25:31.29\00:25:32.79
He handles everything for us.
00:25:32.83\00:25:35.06
And as a result of knowing that
00:25:35.10\00:25:38.93
God's been at the
center and all this,
00:25:38.97\00:25:41.04
you have written a book called
Becoming a Professional Lover.
00:25:41.07\00:25:47.28
Yes. I love this one.
00:25:47.31\00:25:48.64
Now I love that title too.
00:25:48.68\00:25:50.75
And Claude Jr.
and Jocelyn Thomas
00:25:50.78\00:25:53.72
with Patrice Thomas Conwell.
00:25:53.75\00:25:55.92
Tell us about this book?
00:25:55.95\00:25:57.29
Tell us how it
came to be, you know?
00:25:57.32\00:25:59.75
And, Pattie, I want
to hear from you too
00:25:59.79\00:26:01.69
on how this book came to be
00:26:01.72\00:26:05.03
because you guys
are professional lovers,
00:26:05.06\00:26:07.13
I'm telling you.
00:26:07.16\00:26:08.50
One of the things that
just came to me recently,
00:26:08.53\00:26:10.80
the word "becoming".
00:26:10.83\00:26:13.07
We were always
becoming like God.
00:26:13.10\00:26:15.40
Okay.
00:26:15.44\00:26:16.77
We are not going to be like God.
00:26:16.81\00:26:18.47
We'll be becoming like Him.
00:26:18.51\00:26:19.91
We'll never be God.
00:26:19.94\00:26:22.14
We don't want to be that,
but we want to be like Him.
00:26:22.18\00:26:23.51
It was based on
the biblical statement.
00:26:23.55\00:26:25.31
Right. God is love.
00:26:25.35\00:26:26.95
Right.
00:26:26.98\00:26:29.25
We were always growing
00:26:29.28\00:26:30.75
into His likeness
00:26:30.79\00:26:33.36
and getting
better and better at it
00:26:33.39\00:26:36.02
as we go along.
00:26:36.06\00:26:37.79
But the Professional Lover
name actually came from dad.
00:26:37.83\00:26:41.46
When they would do
marriage and family life
00:26:41.50\00:26:44.57
seminars and workshops,
00:26:44.60\00:26:46.60
he would start off by saying
00:26:46.63\00:26:48.47
that he was a
professional lover,
00:26:48.50\00:26:51.07
and, of course,
that got, you know...
00:26:51.11\00:26:53.01
In the audience,
the folks would go...
00:26:53.04\00:26:55.28
"My man, you know, right,
00:26:55.31\00:26:56.98
you know, he is a
professional lover."
00:26:57.01\00:26:59.18
That kind of thing.
00:26:59.21\00:27:00.55
And he used that term on purpose
00:27:00.58\00:27:05.42
really to demonstrate
00:27:05.45\00:27:08.32
that learning how
to love professionally,
00:27:08.36\00:27:12.43
whatever you do
anything professionally,
00:27:12.46\00:27:13.90
it takes time,
it takes studying,
00:27:13.93\00:27:16.46
it takes practice, it
takes mastery of those skills,
00:27:16.50\00:27:20.54
and that's the
whole premise of using
00:27:20.57\00:27:23.00
that term professional lover,
00:27:23.04\00:27:24.37
not that you have any special,
00:27:24.41\00:27:27.54
you know, draw or charm,
00:27:27.58\00:27:32.48
but that you have spent the time
00:27:32.51\00:27:34.45
necessary to be a
professional at doing something,
00:27:34.48\00:27:39.02
which in this case is loving.
00:27:39.05\00:27:41.92
And what's so great, to me,
00:27:41.96\00:27:43.86
one of the things
that's so great about this book
00:27:43.89\00:27:45.79
is that it keeps
the Lord at the center.
00:27:45.83\00:27:49.23
All of these chapters have
to do with biblical principles.
00:27:49.26\00:27:54.77
This is not just people sitting
down surmising how things is...
00:27:54.80\00:28:00.68
I think earlier you
were saying, Pattie,
00:28:00.71\00:28:02.41
that this is based on
00:28:02.44\00:28:04.31
their whole relationship,
tell us about that?
00:28:04.35\00:28:06.41
Actually, how it came
about was as we were preparing
00:28:06.45\00:28:09.38
for their 50th
anniversary celebration,
00:28:09.42\00:28:13.36
I asked them to give me 50 tips
00:28:13.39\00:28:17.39
that I could put together
to hand out as a bookmark
00:28:17.43\00:28:21.70
to those who came
to celebrate with them.
00:28:21.73\00:28:24.20
And it's called...
00:28:24.23\00:28:25.60
I called it Joe and Jackie's
50 ways to keep your lover.
00:28:25.63\00:28:29.74
Kind of a playoff
of the... Of the song.
00:28:29.77\00:28:31.44
The song, right.
00:28:31.47\00:28:33.41
And so I put these
50 tips in this bookmark
00:28:33.44\00:28:37.41
and gave them out to the
people who came as a thank you.
00:28:37.45\00:28:43.08
Not long after that,
00:28:43.12\00:28:44.52
mom started getting
phone calls from people
00:28:44.55\00:28:47.19
saying, "Joe, do you have
anymore of those bookmarks?
00:28:47.22\00:28:50.03
I've got a son who's just
getting ready to get married.
00:28:50.06\00:28:52.99
Or I have a nephew who,
00:28:53.03\00:28:55.06
you know, is talking
about getting married,
00:28:55.10\00:28:56.77
and I want to give them."
00:28:56.80\00:28:58.13
So I started thinking,
00:28:58.17\00:29:00.20
of course, you know,
the people are showing
00:29:00.24\00:29:03.04
a lot of interest in these tips.
00:29:03.07\00:29:05.17
Maybe we need to do
something with the tips.
00:29:05.21\00:29:08.98
And, you know, the Lord
impressed me with the book,
00:29:09.01\00:29:14.15
and then Alton, my husband,
00:29:14.18\00:29:16.22
suggested
making it a devotional.
00:29:16.25\00:29:18.62
And we knew it
couldn't be a daily devotional.
00:29:18.65\00:29:20.56
We only had 50 tips.
00:29:20.59\00:29:22.36
But if you add a two,
00:29:22.39\00:29:24.79
it could become a
weekly devotional.
00:29:24.83\00:29:26.16
There you go.
00:29:26.19\00:29:27.53
And that's how we decided on
making it a weekly devotional.
00:29:27.56\00:29:30.10
So each of the tips
00:29:30.13\00:29:32.00
are from their
own marital journey
00:29:32.03\00:29:36.00
and come from also what
they would teach other couples
00:29:36.04\00:29:40.24
in their marriage
and family life seminars
00:29:40.28\00:29:43.11
on what it takes
to create and maintain
00:29:43.14\00:29:47.52
and nurture a
strong relationship.
00:29:47.55\00:29:50.39
That's good.
00:29:50.42\00:29:51.75
So you wrote the book out
of demand, popular demand?
00:29:51.79\00:29:56.42
I don't know
about popular but yes.
00:29:56.46\00:29:57.79
Starting from
the 50 there, right?
00:29:57.83\00:30:00.60
And then going
on, but when you say
00:30:00.63\00:30:02.96
"the Lord sets things up."
00:30:03.00\00:30:04.43
Yes, He does.
00:30:04.47\00:30:05.80
And it's like, you know,
it's just not happenstance
00:30:05.83\00:30:08.97
that you have a daughter
who is a prolific writer.
00:30:09.00\00:30:11.04
Yeah, she is.
00:30:11.07\00:30:12.41
And so to be able
to put this together...
00:30:12.44\00:30:14.21
Right. And we went through...
00:30:14.24\00:30:16.08
Why don't you read some
of the chapter titles...
00:30:16.11\00:30:17.51
Yes. I want to do that.
00:30:17.55\00:30:18.88
Because I'm going to show
you, and those of you at home,
00:30:18.91\00:30:21.88
you're going to want this book.
00:30:21.92\00:30:23.65
And it's something
I wish I could've read
00:30:23.69\00:30:26.19
maybe a long time ago.
00:30:26.22\00:30:28.09
And probably some of you
are thinking the same thing,
00:30:28.12\00:30:30.89
"I wish I would've."
00:30:30.93\00:30:32.29
But we want you
to get this book.
00:30:32.33\00:30:33.80
We'll tell you how you
can do so in a little bit.
00:30:33.83\00:30:36.03
Bunch of great titles.
00:30:36.06\00:30:37.67
Pattern your love
after Christ and His church.
00:30:37.70\00:30:41.97
That's week one, week
two is structure your love
00:30:42.00\00:30:44.57
around all the
principles in 1 Corinthians 13.
00:30:44.61\00:30:48.74
And then week...
00:30:48.78\00:30:51.11
I won't read 52, but
I'll just give you some.
00:30:51.15\00:30:52.48
Yeah, sure.
00:30:52.51\00:30:53.88
Another one is love is a
commitment, not a feeling.
00:30:53.92\00:30:56.79
I want to stop
there for a second
00:30:56.82\00:30:58.52
because there are so
many people who'll say,
00:30:58.55\00:31:02.82
"I just don't love him anymore.
00:31:02.86\00:31:04.89
Or I just don't
love her anymore."
00:31:04.93\00:31:07.93
What do you say to people
who come to you for counseling
00:31:07.96\00:31:12.70
because that is what you
have been doing all these years?
00:31:12.73\00:31:17.11
What do you say
to people who say,
00:31:17.14\00:31:19.04
"I just don't feel it
anymore for my spouse?"
00:31:19.07\00:31:23.01
But I'll let them
know that prolific writer,
00:31:23.04\00:31:27.62
Ellen White, commented on that
00:31:27.65\00:31:30.99
in one of her
books, Steps to Christ.
00:31:31.02\00:31:34.56
And her statement was
that love is not a feeling,
00:31:34.59\00:31:41.13
it's a principle.
00:31:41.16\00:31:44.10
It's a combination
of thoughts and actions
00:31:44.13\00:31:50.37
and would have you
00:31:50.41\00:31:53.68
that deepen relationships.
00:31:53.71\00:31:57.45
It's a way of behaving.
00:31:57.48\00:31:58.81
It's a way of
behaving. A way of behaving.
00:31:58.85\00:32:01.38
Right.
00:32:01.42\00:32:02.75
And then I thought about
00:32:02.78\00:32:06.89
the text in the Bible that said
00:32:06.92\00:32:09.92
that when the Lord asked Jesus,
00:32:09.96\00:32:16.06
"What must you do to be saved?"
00:32:16.10\00:32:17.47
He said, "You must
love the Lord, your God,
00:32:17.50\00:32:20.60
with all your heart,
soul, mind, and strength,
00:32:20.64\00:32:22.97
and your neighbor as yourself."
00:32:23.00\00:32:24.84
And then the whole story about
00:32:24.87\00:32:27.28
how Jesus talked
about the Samaritan
00:32:27.31\00:32:30.48
who fixed up the man,
00:32:30.51\00:32:31.85
the Jewish man that
had been hurt by the road
00:32:31.88\00:32:37.62
and the relationship between
the Samaritans and the Jews,
00:32:37.65\00:32:42.49
they do not like each other.
00:32:42.52\00:32:44.73
And out of that came a principle
00:32:44.76\00:32:48.86
that I began to
teach in my classes.
00:32:48.90\00:32:50.97
I taught marriage and family
00:32:51.00\00:32:52.33
at Oakwood
University for some years,
00:32:52.37\00:32:57.81
that love for me then became
00:32:57.84\00:33:04.11
doing what you have
to do with what resources
00:33:04.15\00:33:07.72
that you have available to you
00:33:07.75\00:33:11.19
to meet the legitimate
needs of another human being.
00:33:11.22\00:33:16.22
Would you say that
again, Uncle Jackie,
00:33:16.26\00:33:17.59
'cause that's good.
00:33:17.63\00:33:18.96
So this is a
decision. This is a decision.
00:33:18.99\00:33:20.63
That's the principle that I
garnered out of all of that.
00:33:20.66\00:33:23.10
Would you say that
principle again for us?
00:33:23.13\00:33:25.03
That love is
utilizing the resources
00:33:25.07\00:33:28.34
you have available
00:33:28.37\00:33:30.84
to meet the legitimate
needs of another human being.
00:33:30.87\00:33:34.68
Legitimate needs.
00:33:34.71\00:33:36.34
Now that's because
it's not being selfish
00:33:36.38\00:33:42.85
or allowing the other
person even to be selfish,
00:33:42.88\00:33:47.56
it's discovering
what the actual need is
00:33:47.59\00:33:52.59
and relating to that,
00:33:52.63\00:33:56.30
and using whatever
resources you're having,
00:33:56.33\00:33:59.73
garnering whatever resources
you need to meet that need
00:33:59.77\00:34:04.84
which brings about a
sense of satisfaction
00:34:04.87\00:34:09.04
and over a longtime
a sense of happiness
00:34:09.08\00:34:12.61
on the person whose
needs you're providing overtime
00:34:12.65\00:34:17.35
on a consistent basis.
00:34:17.39\00:34:19.52
And I began to
teach that in my class.
00:34:19.55\00:34:22.49
When you first married,
00:34:22.52\00:34:24.93
was it difficult for you
00:34:24.96\00:34:27.66
to ascertain the
needs of the other one,
00:34:27.70\00:34:30.33
or did you just kind of
fallen to it, did you know?
00:34:30.37\00:34:35.00
No, we didn't
fall into it, you know.
00:34:35.04\00:34:40.04
I would give my
students too a personality test
00:34:40.08\00:34:43.51
to find out what
their personalities
00:34:43.55\00:34:45.11
were like and so forth,
00:34:45.15\00:34:47.42
and how they
operated on an actual basis,
00:34:47.45\00:34:51.55
and we
discovered about ourselves
00:34:51.59\00:34:55.36
that for her
doing things for me,
00:34:55.39\00:35:00.73
and in all kinds of
ways whatever it is,
00:35:00.76\00:35:05.33
may not happen.
00:35:05.37\00:35:07.04
I read that in the book Service.
00:35:07.07\00:35:09.24
Yeah, and I also grew up
with my father and my brother,
00:35:09.27\00:35:13.04
so these two men
were very important to me.
00:35:13.07\00:35:17.05
And I would do things for
them, and I enjoyed doing it,
00:35:17.08\00:35:21.52
and so that just
transferred over to this man.
00:35:21.55\00:35:24.25
Where your mother was a doer.
00:35:24.29\00:35:25.62
Yeah, my mother
took care of her family.
00:35:25.65\00:35:27.92
I mean, mom did
everything for us.
00:35:27.96\00:35:31.16
She made our clothes,
she cooked, we canned,
00:35:31.19\00:35:33.73
and we as a
family, the four of us
00:35:33.76\00:35:35.50
did these things together.
00:35:35.53\00:35:36.87
We would go pick the
fruit, come home, can it,
00:35:36.90\00:35:42.17
make the grape juice.
00:35:42.20\00:35:43.54
It was a lot of fun
doing things as a family,
00:35:43.57\00:35:45.67
so that was my natural bet.
00:35:45.71\00:35:48.51
So when I met him, this,
I just carried it right on.
00:35:48.54\00:35:51.61
I would make this man happy.
00:35:51.65\00:35:52.98
I made that decision
before I married him,
00:35:53.01\00:35:55.68
I remember in one youth meeting,
00:35:55.72\00:35:58.95
back in the day,
00:35:58.99\00:36:00.32
it was missionary
volunteer program,
00:36:00.36\00:36:01.99
and husbands and wives,
00:36:02.02\00:36:03.56
and we have back
then getting together,
00:36:03.59\00:36:05.79
talking about marriage.
00:36:05.83\00:36:07.46
And, Danny, one lady stood up,
00:36:07.50\00:36:11.27
and she said, "Well, you know,
I work as well as my husband,
00:36:11.30\00:36:16.24
and when I come home from work,
00:36:16.27\00:36:18.37
I'm tired too, but I'm
in the kitchen cooking,
00:36:18.41\00:36:20.48
and he goes and sits
down and reads the newspaper,"
00:36:20.51\00:36:22.94
and the big discussion came on,
00:36:22.98\00:36:24.65
they were bickering back
and forth in the meeting.
00:36:24.68\00:36:28.65
So I stood up, I
said, "Brothers and sisters,
00:36:28.68\00:36:32.65
I'm not married and
I've never been married,
00:36:32.69\00:36:35.46
but I declare to
you that if the Lord
00:36:35.49\00:36:38.03
should give me a
husband, I won't be bickering,
00:36:38.06\00:36:40.96
I want him to sit
down and enjoy himself.
00:36:41.00\00:36:42.73
I want to take care of him.
00:36:42.76\00:36:44.10
I want to do for him.
00:36:44.13\00:36:45.47
That's where it came from.
00:36:45.50\00:36:47.24
My whole heart
was just breaking out
00:36:47.27\00:36:48.90
that I want to love
him whatever it means."
00:36:48.94\00:36:51.14
Yes. And that's how
you would love by service.
00:36:51.17\00:36:53.94
Now, my love style...
00:36:53.98\00:36:55.54
I didn't know
anything about the style
00:36:55.58\00:36:56.91
and all that at that time.
00:36:56.95\00:36:58.28
Predominant part of my
love style was togetherness.
00:36:58.31\00:37:03.32
Stop doing for
me, come and sit down.
00:37:03.35\00:37:07.86
He sounds a little tough,
00:37:07.89\00:37:09.36
but that's not
how he came across.
00:37:09.39\00:37:11.09
Yeah. Until one night though...
00:37:11.13\00:37:12.73
Let's talk and
just do things together.
00:37:12.76\00:37:15.30
Tell us what
happened that night?
00:37:15.33\00:37:17.27
Well, my husband is a reader,
00:37:17.30\00:37:19.60
and if I had someone to
be jealous of or something,
00:37:19.63\00:37:24.57
it would be books
because he just reads.
00:37:24.61\00:37:29.14
Obsessive reader.
Then I was a teacher.
00:37:29.18\00:37:30.81
Yeah, but he loved to
read. That's his pastime.
00:37:30.85\00:37:33.75
But I wasn't
jealous of his books
00:37:33.78\00:37:35.15
'cause I learned from...
00:37:35.18\00:37:36.52
I'm not the
reader, he is the reader.
00:37:36.55\00:37:38.95
So you heard of
stories of wives, husbands
00:37:38.99\00:37:43.66
getting up out of the
bed or the wife or somebody,
00:37:43.69\00:37:46.23
and when they find them
they're in another room,
00:37:46.26\00:37:48.00
and they have died.
00:37:48.03\00:37:50.17
So whenever I reached over,
00:37:50.20\00:37:51.53
and he wasn't there in
the middle of the night,
00:37:51.57\00:37:54.00
I would get up
and go search for him.
00:37:54.04\00:37:56.00
This could be serious.
00:37:56.04\00:37:58.51
So this particular
night, I went to the kitchen,
00:37:58.54\00:38:02.14
and he was there,
looking at our love, our tests.
00:38:02.18\00:38:07.68
You know, we had
done the love style tests
00:38:07.72\00:38:09.45
and personality tests,
and he's looking at them.
00:38:09.48\00:38:13.22
I was studying.
00:38:13.25\00:38:14.59
And you have to know
him that he doesn't...
00:38:14.62\00:38:18.16
You can talk to Jackie,
00:38:18.19\00:38:19.89
and he will not
respond right away,
00:38:19.93\00:38:21.26
because he's a deep thinker.
00:38:21.30\00:38:23.67
So I went in, and I
said, "Honey, are you okay?"
00:38:23.70\00:38:26.47
Silence, not a
word, so I went over,
00:38:29.70\00:38:32.84
I said, "Jackie, are you okay?"
00:38:32.87\00:38:35.18
I said, "Honey,
what's going on?"
00:38:39.68\00:38:42.82
"You don't love me,"
this is his response.
00:38:42.85\00:38:45.49
"You don't love
me," I said, "What?"
00:38:45.52\00:38:47.86
In fact, you
have never loved me.
00:38:47.89\00:38:49.46
But before he said that part,
00:38:49.49\00:38:52.63
I'm trying to
digest the first part,
00:38:52.66\00:38:56.67
"You don't love me," I
said, "What do you mean?"
00:38:56.70\00:39:00.80
"In fact,
you've never loved me."
00:39:00.84\00:39:02.60
Then I said, "This is serious."
00:39:02.64\00:39:04.57
Tears rolled up in
my mind, in my eyes,
00:39:04.61\00:39:06.81
and I said, "I need
to listen to this man."
00:39:06.84\00:39:10.11
Mind you they have been
married 10 years already.
00:39:10.15\00:39:12.78
I said, "I need to..."
00:39:12.81\00:39:14.15
So for him to say,
you've never loved me.
00:39:14.18\00:39:16.32
You've never
loved me. Over 10 years.
00:39:16.35\00:39:18.62
That threw me for a loop.
Yeah. That's kind of heavy.
00:39:18.65\00:39:20.42
I've loved with
all my heart. Yes.
00:39:20.46\00:39:22.62
And I promised God
00:39:22.66\00:39:23.99
that I would love a
husband if He gave me one.
00:39:24.03\00:39:26.59
And then he tells me
I have never loved him.
00:39:26.63\00:39:29.30
So I said, "Joe, you
need to listen to this man.
00:39:29.33\00:39:32.13
He's trying to
tell you something."
00:39:32.17\00:39:35.04
And what was that?
00:39:35.07\00:39:36.40
So I sat down, and
you take it from there,
00:39:36.44\00:39:38.51
honey, what did you tell me.
00:39:38.54\00:39:43.14
"That our love
styles were very different."
00:39:43.18\00:39:45.81
That's when we began to
see our differences, you know.
00:39:45.85\00:39:51.05
And she would get her
joy out of all the things
00:39:51.09\00:39:55.22
she would do for
me to make me happy.
00:39:55.26\00:40:01.73
My love style was togetherness.
00:40:01.76\00:40:05.17
Be with me, talk to me,
00:40:05.20\00:40:10.07
spend time with me,
00:40:10.11\00:40:14.34
and let's enjoy
time together, right.
00:40:14.38\00:40:18.01
Times other than
the intimate moments
00:40:18.05\00:40:19.91
because we did a lot of...
00:40:19.95\00:40:21.28
We always did everything
together though, honey.
00:40:21.32\00:40:24.35
But he means when
we would come home,
00:40:24.39\00:40:28.89
I'm busy doing for him,
00:40:28.92\00:40:30.26
you know, I'd
get his dinner ready,
00:40:30.29\00:40:31.69
make sure this is
done, and it's all,
00:40:31.73\00:40:34.53
the clothes are
nice, the bedroom is nice,
00:40:34.56\00:40:37.53
that's not what he wanted.
00:40:37.57\00:40:39.37
And I didn't know that.
00:40:39.40\00:40:42.67
What's great about this book
00:40:42.70\00:40:45.01
is you're really
writing out of experience.
00:40:45.04\00:40:47.64
You're not setting up in
a classroom style saying,
00:40:47.68\00:40:50.08
let's see, if you do this,
00:40:50.11\00:40:51.55
this equals this,
and this equals...
00:40:51.58\00:40:53.72
Oh, yeah.
00:40:53.75\00:40:55.08
Your book, and what, people
and especially younger folk,
00:40:55.12\00:40:58.52
maybe all of us, are
going to get from this is this
00:40:58.55\00:41:01.89
is your relationship
that you have given it to God,
00:41:01.92\00:41:08.16
and you've both
dedicated your lives
00:41:08.20\00:41:10.77
to God and to each other.
00:41:10.80\00:41:12.70
And I'm sure during the course
of that, not everything's been,
00:41:12.73\00:41:15.80
we used the term
around here, hunky-dory,
00:41:15.84\00:41:17.97
but everything is
good all the time.
00:41:18.01\00:41:20.81
But even I'm sure some of this
that you're going to show us
00:41:20.84\00:41:24.65
even when things don't look bad,
00:41:24.68\00:41:26.58
here's the answer,
00:41:26.61\00:41:27.95
and here's why
you're still together
00:41:27.98\00:41:29.32
because you put God
first than each other.
00:41:29.35\00:41:31.39
And the idea was
what God had given us.
00:41:31.42\00:41:34.86
Yeah.
00:41:34.89\00:41:36.22
What teaches how to fix
it when things going to go
00:41:36.26\00:41:40.93
and just right and other
things needed to be done,
00:41:40.96\00:41:45.43
we begin to learn what could
be done to fix the relationship.
00:41:45.47\00:41:51.97
You know, when two
people want to be together,
00:41:52.01\00:41:55.61
having all kinds of
problems, if you have a desire,
00:41:55.64\00:41:59.21
God can fix that.
00:41:59.25\00:42:00.98
He can take those problems
00:42:01.02\00:42:03.49
and literally bring you back
to where you originally were,
00:42:03.52\00:42:07.72
just like when we
fall in sin, away from God,
00:42:07.76\00:42:11.46
if we have repented in
the true heart want to,
00:42:11.49\00:42:15.26
we can be drawn
closer to God again,
00:42:15.30\00:42:17.73
and you can do that
with a husband and wife
00:42:17.77\00:42:20.84
if that's what you want.
00:42:20.87\00:42:22.60
That's why, Danny,
it's important to know
00:42:22.64\00:42:25.77
we did not developed
love, what we did not create...
00:42:25.81\00:42:30.68
Mankind did not make love,
God is the originator of love.
00:42:30.71\00:42:34.75
God is love, that's
where love comes from.
00:42:34.78\00:42:36.89
That's who He is.
00:42:36.92\00:42:38.82
And Satan doesn't
want you to love that way.
00:42:38.85\00:42:42.42
He wants to do it over
here, so people get married,
00:42:42.46\00:42:44.83
and in six months,
they're separating, divorcing,
00:42:44.86\00:42:48.00
they're bickering, and all that.
00:42:48.03\00:42:49.36
That's what Satan likes,
00:42:49.40\00:42:50.87
but if you based your foundation
00:42:50.90\00:42:52.43
on the source of love,
00:42:52.47\00:42:54.80
how can you go wrong.
00:42:54.84\00:42:56.17
You want to learn.
00:42:56.20\00:42:57.61
See, that's why the title is
Becoming a Professional Lover.
00:42:57.64\00:43:01.61
You're in school.
The focus of sin...
00:43:01.64\00:43:03.41
You're in a love school.
00:43:03.45\00:43:05.01
Right. Love school.
00:43:05.05\00:43:06.38
The focus of sin is selfishness.
00:43:06.41\00:43:09.18
Where as God,
the focus is others,
00:43:09.22\00:43:11.99
doing for others,
to meet their needs,
00:43:12.02\00:43:15.72
and once we discover that...
00:43:15.76\00:43:17.43
Once we discover what the
needs are or were, you know.
00:43:17.46\00:43:23.06
And His principles
will tell you how to fix it.
00:43:23.10\00:43:25.67
Right. And that's what...
00:43:25.70\00:43:27.04
One of the things I
love about this book is that,
00:43:27.07\00:43:29.27
it says like, "Love isn't
love until your spouse says so,
00:43:29.30\00:43:33.41
or love your
spouse his or her way."
00:43:33.44\00:43:37.15
You know, it's not just
what you perceive as love
00:43:37.18\00:43:42.72
but what does your
spouse need from you.
00:43:42.75\00:43:45.65
And that's what
all the testing does.
00:43:45.69\00:43:48.06
You know, and that's...
00:43:48.09\00:43:49.42
There are tests
in this book as well?
00:43:49.46\00:43:51.16
No, not in the book, but
we do suggest where to go
00:43:51.19\00:43:54.36
and find
different types of tests.
00:43:54.40\00:43:56.63
But that has been kind of
the hallmark of dad's practice
00:43:56.67\00:44:00.94
through the years is
using these personality tests,
00:44:00.97\00:44:05.77
and loving styles tests,
00:44:05.81\00:44:08.08
and spiritual gifts
test on couples to see
00:44:08.11\00:44:12.48
where the compatibility
is if there is compatibility,
00:44:12.51\00:44:16.08
if there's not a
lot of compatibility
00:44:16.12\00:44:18.15
because marriage
is supposed to be
00:44:18.19\00:44:22.66
a thoughtful process
00:44:22.69\00:44:25.83
when you're thinking
about getting married,
00:44:25.86\00:44:27.36
it's supposed to not
just be of the heart,
00:44:27.40\00:44:29.76
I think Ellen
White talks about it
00:44:29.80\00:44:31.23
being head and
heart and not just,
00:44:31.27\00:44:34.20
"Oh, he's fine,
or just he's fine,
00:44:34.24\00:44:36.77
and we have this
physical chemistry."
00:44:36.81\00:44:38.64
No, you're supposed to
be thinking about it too.
00:44:38.67\00:44:41.34
And I mean, so he put
everybody in our family,
00:44:41.38\00:44:44.31
all the kids, and their spouses,
00:44:44.35\00:44:47.58
their going-to-be spouses
through these tests, you know.
00:44:47.62\00:44:50.99
In fact, when Pattie
was living in DC area,
00:44:51.02\00:44:54.82
and she came home and
brought out for us to meet him,
00:44:54.86\00:44:58.16
that's Pattie's husband.
00:44:58.19\00:45:00.80
A whole lot
happened that weekend,
00:45:00.83\00:45:03.03
so in the course of
all of that, that...
00:45:03.06\00:45:05.87
In fact, before they
came, before she came home,
00:45:05.90\00:45:08.20
before she came
home, Daddy set the test.
00:45:08.24\00:45:10.81
He mailed his tests.
00:45:10.84\00:45:12.51
Now Al and I were not
00:45:12.54\00:45:15.24
talking at that
time about being married,
00:45:15.28\00:45:16.95
but we were both
older, in our 30s.
00:45:16.98\00:45:18.91
And, you know, at that time,
00:45:18.95\00:45:20.28
it's not going
to take a long time
00:45:20.32\00:45:21.65
to decide if it's the one,
00:45:21.68\00:45:23.92
but we weren't
talking about that.
00:45:23.95\00:45:26.12
So he mails these tests,
00:45:26.15\00:45:27.72
he says, "Take
these before you come."
00:45:27.76\00:45:30.63
And, you know, praise
the Lord for my husband
00:45:30.66\00:45:32.93
who was a good
sport, he was like,
00:45:32.96\00:45:34.96
you know, he could've
easily been like, "Tests?
00:45:35.00\00:45:36.80
I'm not taking them tests."
00:45:36.83\00:45:38.47
You know, all he
was like, you know,
00:45:38.50\00:45:41.10
"Hey, that seems
kind of fun, sure."
00:45:41.14\00:45:43.61
And when we got to Huntsville,
and kiss-kiss, hug-hug,
00:45:43.64\00:45:48.61
how you doing,
glad you made it here,
00:45:48.64\00:45:49.98
where are the tests.
00:45:50.01\00:45:52.55
And he took the tests
00:45:52.58\00:45:53.98
and went to his
office to analyze them.
00:45:54.02\00:45:57.09
To analyze them.
Yes, he did. Absolutely.
00:45:57.12\00:45:59.75
And I think the viewers need
to know that, by profession,
00:45:59.79\00:46:03.09
you would have been a
counselor and a professor,
00:46:03.12\00:46:05.86
a teacher all these years,
00:46:05.89\00:46:07.56
and Aunt Joe has also counseled
and been a registered nurse,
00:46:07.60\00:46:11.07
and you all have done
family life for years together.
00:46:11.10\00:46:15.50
So this is not just somebody...
00:46:15.54\00:46:16.87
And, Yvonne,
this is our only girl.
00:46:16.91\00:46:18.24
I mean what more,
the man's not just
00:46:18.27\00:46:19.87
going to throw her
out there to the world.
00:46:19.91\00:46:22.11
We didn't know Al.
00:46:22.14\00:46:24.05
He wanted to make sure
00:46:24.08\00:46:25.41
that he was giving his
daughter to the right one.
00:46:25.45\00:46:28.52
And, Pattie, of course,
is a professional writer,
00:46:28.55\00:46:30.65
and you've written
how many books, Pattie?
00:46:30.69\00:46:32.75
Oh, I've ghostwritten three,
and wrote an e-book of my own,
00:46:32.79\00:46:37.76
Nobody Ever Told Me I
Might Not Get Married!
00:46:37.79\00:46:39.86
Yes. And then this one.
00:46:39.89\00:46:42.30
Yes, yes, yes.
00:46:42.33\00:46:43.67
Is there
anything, in particular,
00:46:43.70\00:46:45.23
that you've
learned about your folks
00:46:45.27\00:46:48.34
while you were
writing this book,
00:46:48.37\00:46:49.90
or did you pretty well,
00:46:49.94\00:46:51.27
you've kind of grown up with it,
00:46:51.31\00:46:52.64
or is there anything that
you've learned that sticks out?
00:46:52.67\00:46:54.88
I don't know that I
learned anything new
00:46:54.91\00:46:57.08
when writing this
book, but it's funny
00:46:57.11\00:47:00.85
and in talking with them
00:47:00.88\00:47:02.72
'cause what we did
was we took each tip,
00:47:02.75\00:47:05.25
and I would ask questions
00:47:05.29\00:47:07.29
and, you know, they would
respond, but a lot of times,
00:47:07.32\00:47:10.43
their responses would
spark little back and forth
00:47:10.46\00:47:14.86
encounters which showed me
00:47:14.90\00:47:17.40
that this never
goes out of style
00:47:17.43\00:47:20.64
for having to go
back and review it,
00:47:20.67\00:47:24.27
and we study it
because, you know...
00:47:24.31\00:47:26.94
It started just like
who called who, you know...
00:47:26.98\00:47:28.41
But the book is good.
00:47:28.44\00:47:30.45
Danny, the book
is good for us too.
00:47:30.48\00:47:33.62
You know, so, and
mom would often say,
00:47:33.65\00:47:36.25
you know, "We're
in a new era now."
00:47:36.28\00:47:37.79
She's now my
dad's primary caretaker
00:47:37.82\00:47:40.86
after him experiencing a
lot of health challenges.
00:47:40.89\00:47:44.73
And so that brings
out a whole new experience
00:47:44.76\00:47:50.53
that require them to now go back
00:47:50.57\00:47:54.24
and review some
of these same tips,
00:47:54.27\00:47:56.44
so that just shows that,
00:47:56.47\00:47:58.31
you know, this is a
resource that is everlasting.
00:47:58.34\00:48:01.58
I've been
married almost 25 years,
00:48:01.61\00:48:03.45
I would say that Al and I
have a great relationship,
00:48:03.48\00:48:06.51
but we're going
through the book,
00:48:06.55\00:48:09.08
and realizing that there's
always something to tweak.
00:48:09.12\00:48:12.95
There's always something
that you can be doing better,
00:48:12.99\00:48:16.39
and that's really what I've
learned through this process.
00:48:16.42\00:48:19.09
Well, I wanted to
say to, Danny and Yvonne,
00:48:19.13\00:48:22.86
my husband's 85
years old, I'm 78,
00:48:22.90\00:48:25.43
I'm seven years
younger than my husband.
00:48:25.47\00:48:29.47
By profession, I was a nurse,
00:48:29.50\00:48:33.38
the Lord knew all that
because he's on dialysis now.
00:48:33.41\00:48:37.18
His kidneys have shut down,
00:48:37.21\00:48:38.61
but praise God, we
have the system of dialysis.
00:48:38.65\00:48:42.78
And I'm not uncomfortable,
the things that he needs done,
00:48:42.82\00:48:47.36
blood pressure, finger
pricking for his diabetes,
00:48:47.39\00:48:50.93
how to feed him,
which foods not to give him,
00:48:50.96\00:48:53.60
that's all in my background.
00:48:53.63\00:48:55.60
So I match him at
this stage of life.
00:48:55.63\00:48:58.53
When we were first married,
this man did everything for me,
00:48:58.57\00:49:02.60
I was the homemaker, and
he handled all the bills,
00:49:02.64\00:49:06.88
all everything,
just all that was done,
00:49:06.91\00:49:10.08
and thank God for our children
00:49:10.11\00:49:11.78
because they now have stepped in
00:49:11.81\00:49:13.42
to do what he can't do now.
00:49:13.45\00:49:15.38
He doesn't pay any bills
now, our younger son does that.
00:49:15.42\00:49:18.95
If something needs to be
fixed, Al or Brian or anybody,
00:49:18.99\00:49:23.46
the children are
there now to take care of us
00:49:23.49\00:49:26.09
where we first
took care of them.
00:49:26.13\00:49:27.50
That's beautiful.
00:49:27.53\00:49:28.86
And God has
really worked that out.
00:49:28.90\00:49:30.23
It's a beautiful thing
when you do things God's way,
00:49:30.27\00:49:35.14
it's awesome.
00:49:35.17\00:49:36.50
And let me piggyback on that
00:49:36.54\00:49:37.87
because that also
demonstrates that the book,
00:49:37.91\00:49:40.21
even though the
context is marriage
00:49:40.24\00:49:43.08
and a marital relationship,
00:49:43.11\00:49:45.11
we're still really
talking about love.
00:49:45.15\00:49:47.88
The love relationship,
00:49:47.92\00:49:49.35
and that can be
singles to singles,
00:49:49.38\00:49:53.42
within families, it doesn't
necessarily just mean couples.
00:49:53.46\00:49:57.83
There are a lot of
principles in there
00:49:57.86\00:50:00.20
that just relate
to how do you love
00:50:00.23\00:50:02.66
another person God's way.
00:50:02.70\00:50:05.67
Oh, good. That's great.
00:50:05.70\00:50:07.34
And we want to make
sure we get an address
00:50:07.37\00:50:09.77
because I know that
you all are going to want
00:50:09.80\00:50:11.54
and get your
copies of this book,
00:50:11.57\00:50:13.71
and so maybe right now,
would this be a good time?
00:50:13.74\00:50:16.61
I'm the co-host
today, not the host.
00:50:16.64\00:50:17.98
No, no, no,
please, please, go for it.
00:50:18.01\00:50:19.35
Okay, all right.
00:50:19.38\00:50:20.72
I just wanted to support here.
00:50:20.75\00:50:22.08
What we'd like to do
if you're interested,
00:50:22.12\00:50:23.89
and I know that you
are, you have questions,
00:50:23.92\00:50:25.99
you may contact them
at the following address.
00:50:26.02\00:50:30.79
For over 30 years,
Claude and Joe Thomas
00:50:30.83\00:50:33.50
have studied, practiced,
00:50:33.53\00:50:35.10
and shared relationship
advice from the Bible.
00:50:35.13\00:50:38.17
And that has led to over
50 years of joyful marriage.
00:50:38.20\00:50:42.20
They know that God's way works,
00:50:42.24\00:50:44.21
and they want to
share it with you.
00:50:44.24\00:50:46.54
To get your own
copy of their book,
00:50:46.57\00:50:48.38
Becoming a Professional
Lover or the Companion workbook,
00:50:48.41\00:50:52.11
please visit their website,
TheProfessionalLover.net.
00:50:52.15\00:50:56.45
That's TheProfessionalLover.net.
00:50:56.48\00:50:59.32
If you would like to
contact them in person,
00:50:59.35\00:51:01.56
you may do so by calling
area code (256) 714-3822.
00:51:01.59\00:51:07.50
So people can
go to your website,
00:51:16.10\00:51:18.37
and what's on the website?
00:51:18.41\00:51:20.61
Well, on the website,
00:51:20.64\00:51:21.98
it's a little
bit about my parents,
00:51:22.01\00:51:23.35
their background, credentials
if you will and all that.
00:51:23.38\00:51:27.92
And it gives a
little bit about the book,
00:51:27.95\00:51:30.29
but for the
website particularly,
00:51:30.32\00:51:32.75
there is a workbook
00:51:32.79\00:51:34.12
that is a companion
to this actual book.
00:51:34.16\00:51:38.26
And the workbook
facilitates the study part.
00:51:38.29\00:51:42.06
At the end of each week's
tip is a homework assignment,
00:51:42.10\00:51:45.77
which makes it nice to
give your week to study the tip
00:51:45.80\00:51:48.40
and to do some of the homework.
00:51:48.44\00:51:50.74
And so the workbook is
available on the website,
00:51:50.77\00:51:54.44
and you can buy it
right there through Paypal.
00:51:54.48\00:51:57.85
And it comes in
two different formats,
00:51:57.88\00:51:59.58
a PDF format if you just want
to print it out on your own,
00:51:59.61\00:52:02.58
or Word doc format if you
want to keep it in your computer
00:52:02.62\00:52:05.42
and actually put your
answers right on the computer.
00:52:05.45\00:52:08.32
Nice.
00:52:08.36\00:52:09.69
Otherwise, the book itself can
be gotten through Amazon.com,
00:52:09.72\00:52:13.90
Barnes&Noble.com,
BooksaMillion.com.
00:52:13.93\00:52:16.93
If you want to
actually go to Barnes & Noble
00:52:16.97\00:52:19.10
and request it,
00:52:19.13\00:52:21.00
and it will come
through the store itself.
00:52:21.04\00:52:25.21
And it's in a print format,
as well as an e-book format.
00:52:25.24\00:52:28.24
Great.
00:52:28.28\00:52:29.61
Okay, I'd like to
suggest church leaders
00:52:29.64\00:52:33.42
that you get one of these
00:52:33.45\00:52:34.98
because with the
study guides and all,
00:52:35.02\00:52:37.55
especially pastors when
you're counseling people
00:52:37.59\00:52:40.76
preparing for marriage,
what a great book for them,
00:52:40.79\00:52:43.32
and your church
could actually buy,
00:52:43.36\00:52:44.76
make a donation to each of these
00:52:44.79\00:52:46.73
which you could go
through these lessons with them,
00:52:46.76\00:52:49.06
I think that'd be...
00:52:49.10\00:52:50.43
Or even with your
church group. So great.
00:52:50.47\00:52:51.80
Yeah. Absolutely. Yes.
00:52:51.83\00:52:53.17
Marriage and family... Leaders.
00:52:53.20\00:52:54.67
Leaders, this is
a wonderful tool.
00:52:54.70\00:52:57.27
It is.
00:52:57.31\00:52:58.64
But you know what's
bad, this time is almost out.
00:52:58.67\00:53:00.51
I know.
00:53:00.54\00:53:01.88
So what we're going to
do is not totally over.
00:53:01.91\00:53:03.55
We're going to
go to a news break.
00:53:03.58\00:53:05.15
We'll be back in just a moment.
00:53:05.18\00:53:06.51