Participants: Shelley Quinn (Host), Rachel Williams-Smith
Series Code: TDY
Program Code: TDY016083A
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00:01 I want to spend my life
00:07 Mending broken people 00:12 I want to spend my life 00:18 Removing pain 00:23 Lord, let my words 00:29 Heal a heart that hurts 00:34 I want to spend my life 00:40 Mending broken people 00:45 I want to spend my life 00:51 Mending broken people. 01:07 Hello, and welcome once again to 3ABN Today. 01:11 We're having a wonderful day here at 3ABN 01:13 and we hope that yours is even better. 01:17 Just want to take this opportunity 01:19 to thank you so much for your continued prayers 01:22 and financial support of this ministry 01:24 because it is the mending broken heart channel. 01:30 And we're just so grateful 01:31 that God has given us this opportunity 01:34 to work with you as our partners, 01:36 to reach out and touch the lost, 01:38 and the suffering around the world. 01:40 I want to share a scripture with you 01:42 before I introduce my guest 01:43 and it is in Revelation 12:11, 01:47 and in this scripture 01:50 the Bible says, 01:52 "They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb 01:55 and by the word of their testimony." 01:58 You know, there is nothing more powerful 02:02 than a personal testimony 02:04 and it brings God so much glory. 02:08 The woman that I want to introduce to you now, 02:10 I met what 10 years ago maybe? 02:14 It was around 2003. 02:16 2003, so, wow that's been even longer. 02:20 Rachel William Smith and, Rachel, 02:23 we're so glad that you're here. 02:25 We first met in Houston, Texas. 02:29 And when I heard your story, I was so blown away. 02:32 I told you, 02:34 you've got to write a book and you did. 02:38 But we're here today to talk about your story 02:41 and how it brings glory to God. 02:44 And how your story is affecting so many other people's life, 02:48 impacting their lives for the positive. 02:51 Thank you so much for being here today. 02:54 Thank you for having me, 02:55 I feel blessed to be here this morning. 02:56 Oh, yeah. 02:58 We are going to... 02:59 Before we get into this testimony though, 03:01 we want to have a little music. 03:03 You like music I know, 03:04 so who we have with us today singing 03:07 are Todd and Lisa Parrish 03:10 and they are going to sing for us 03:11 "One More Voice." 03:28 Listen to the singing 03:31 of the people of the Lord 03:34 Filling all the earth with songs of praise 03:41 For, by many millions now, the Savior is adored 03:47 I have also joined the song they raise! 03:58 One more voice to sing of Jesus 04:04 and his boundless love divine 04:11 One more voice to join in worship 04:17 One more voice it will be mine! 04:23 One more voice to speak His goodness 04:29 Tell of His rich gifts outpoured 04:36 Add my song to swell the chorus 04:42 One more voice Here's one more voice 04:49 One more voice 04:51 to praise the Lord! 05:02 Maybe just a few will hear the song of praise I sing 05:08 But, my friend, I'll sing it just the same 05:15 Daily and with gratitude I'll worship Christ my King 05:21 Wonderful and precious is His name! 05:32 One more voice to sing of Jesus 05:39 And his wondrous love divine 05:45 One more voice to join in worship 05:51 One more voice it will be mine 05:57 One more voice to speak His goodness 06:04 Tell of His rich gifts outpoured 06:10 Add my song to swell the chorus 06:17 One more voice Here's one more voice 06:23 One more voice 06:26 to praise the Lord! 06:36 One more voice to speak His goodness 06:43 Tell of His rich gifts outpoured 06:50 Add my song to swell the chorus 06:56 One more voice Here's one more voice 07:03 One more voice 07:05 to praise the Lord! 07:23 Well, amen and amen. 07:24 We were just sitting here 07:26 singing along with Lisa and Todd, 07:27 and we want to thank them so much for their dedication 07:31 and for dedicating their gifts to the glory of God. 07:35 Well, if you've joined us just a few moments late, 07:38 our special guest today is Rachel Williams Smith, 07:41 and boy, has she got a story to tell. 07:45 Let's just go back 07:47 and talk about your childhood. 07:50 You were brought up in a Christian home, 07:53 in a Seventh-day Adventist Christian home, 07:56 but somewhere along the line something happened 08:02 that instead of following independents 08:05 upon the Lord, 08:06 there was a little tweak and they kind of got, 08:10 I'll just say that was almost like a detour. 08:13 It was a harder path, let's put it that way. 08:15 Tell us about growing up? 08:17 Sure, I think my early life 08:20 as in from one to about five 08:23 was normal Seventh-day Adventist 08:25 growing up except my father was in the military. 08:27 So the first place I remember being is actually in Spain. 08:31 And then we came back to the Huntsville, Alabama area 08:35 and my brothers went to 08:37 the Adventist elementary school there, 08:39 and I was looking forward to being able to go as well. 08:43 But my parents have been doing a lot of reading 08:46 Bible, Spirit of Prophecy, health books, 08:49 and lot of writings by people 08:50 who were somewhat dissatisfied with the church. 08:53 And over time, over the months 08:56 that a curve path began passing 08:59 after about the time I turned six, I mean five, 09:03 a lot of changes began to come into our lives. 09:05 So the first thing was diet I think, you know, 09:09 and we actually went to 09:10 a better diet of things concerned. 09:12 So we were regular vegetarians, we basically turn vegan. 09:16 I don't remember if that term was around back then 09:19 but that's all we became and... 09:21 So the vegan means 09:23 that you are eating no animal products whatsoever, 09:25 so that gets rid of the eggs, milk etc. 09:27 Right. 09:28 And then we also let go off sugar 09:29 and things like that, 09:31 so I had already developed a certain taste, 09:34 you know, for how food should be 09:35 so when we went from the white fluffy biscuits 09:37 to the whole wheat biscuits, 09:40 I didn't love that and we went from eggs 09:42 to something that was supposed to replace eggs. 09:45 Eggs I didn't think it was replacement, 09:48 but it did make me healthier 09:50 because I used to get a lot of colds and flu, 09:53 you know, stuff like that so I got... 09:55 It improved my health. 09:57 So it was overall a good change. 09:59 And then the next thing 10:01 where we actually traveling a lot, 10:02 going from place to place, 10:04 visiting with other people who had 10:06 properly you could say dissatisfaction with the church 10:09 and just learning from them. 10:12 The next thing that I remember though, 10:14 I remember the travels 10:15 but they were just what they were. 10:17 But the next thing was the dress. 10:20 I remember mom came into my room one day and she said, 10:23 you know, did you know that Jesus wears a dress, 10:25 oh, not a dress, 10:26 Jesus wears a garment down to the foot, 10:29 and she said, would you like to be like Jesus. 10:32 And so, of course, 10:33 I mean I wanted to be, I was six at this time, 10:35 of course I want to be like Jesus 10:37 so I said yes. 10:39 And also that where she showed me a quote 10:41 we should wear dresses two to three inches 10:43 from the floor. 10:44 So that was the next thing, 10:45 and I actually have a picture of me at six 10:48 with one of the first homemade long dresses 10:52 that my mom did for me. 10:53 And this quote was written back in the 1890s probably. 10:57 Right, exactly, exactly. 11:00 So, and... 11:02 At my first my mom sort of bore around whatever, 11:04 you know, like a extension on whatever clothes I had 11:07 and I thought that looked really tacky 11:09 and I told her that, 11:10 so she tried applying rickrack around it, 11:12 and I said that doesn't work so she end up making, 11:15 start making my clothes and I didn't know 11:16 but from then until I was, you know, nearly 17. 11:21 All my clothes were with the thing 11:22 she made pretty much. 11:25 But the next change is the one that really changed our lives. 11:29 And that was my father decided that we were not going, 11:33 he was not gonna return my brothers 11:34 to the elementary school 11:36 and he wasn't gonna allow me to start school. 11:39 So instead, he was gonna home-school us. 11:42 And I remember he brought three little wooden desks 11:44 and put them in the living room of our home. 11:46 We lived 19 OA Rideout Road, I still remember the address. 11:50 And there we are the first day of school 11:54 where I'm supposed to be 11:55 at what was elementary school at the time, 11:57 I'm supposed to be there 11:58 and instead I'm sitting in my living room 12:01 learning scriptures and passages 12:04 from the Ellen White writings, 12:06 and I was so sad 'cause I want to be with, 12:09 you know, with other kids at school. 12:11 But the reason why that was a big change 12:13 is because we ended up being reported, 12:15 someone reported us to the authorities and... 12:18 So was home schooling not... it was not legal. 12:22 It was not legal back. 12:23 Yeah, and this was prior 12:24 to when you have all of these options 12:26 for home schooling, joining with home school networks 12:28 and all of that kind of thing. 12:30 The parents can do now, this was not... 12:32 this before any of that was established. 12:34 So it wasn't structured, 12:36 it was kind of left up to your parents 12:38 to try to decide what to do and what to teach you. 12:40 They began trying to use books over the years 12:44 that home schooling happened 12:45 we used books from the Mennonites, 12:48 they have this Rod and Staff publishers company back then. 12:52 And we also tried some books from Wildwood 12:54 which is self supporting Seventh-day Adventist school. 12:56 They had a school we used some of the books from them. 13:00 And that's what we started out with I remember that, 13:03 trying to do some of their program. 13:05 And then after a while of course 13:07 as the time went on, 13:09 it was just kind of put a book in front of you 13:10 and you read or try to do some of the work. 13:13 So it evolved over the time, 13:15 but at the time when the home schooling happen, 13:18 what made it so significant 13:20 is that we got someone reported us 13:23 and the authorities came after us. 13:24 They threatened my parents 13:26 to either put us back in school 13:28 or they were gonna take us away, 13:29 and my father said, no, 13:31 I have another option 13:32 and he took us away out of society. 13:34 So that is what began 13:37 our flight out of society 13:41 as we would call it now, calling going off the grid. 13:45 So it happen its edges. Fled to the hills. 13:47 Yeah, we first went to Arkansas, 13:50 we were there for time 13:51 and then we ended up in Ardmore, Tennessee, 13:55 just on the Tennessee side I believe 13:57 or anyway right on the border of Tennessee and Alabama. 14:01 Stayed out there on a farm and then we ended up, 14:03 we were there for I don't know close to a year, 14:06 did some home schooling there with another family 14:08 and then we ended up 14:10 going to Monte Sano State Park in Huntsville, Alabama. 14:13 And we lived there in a bus for a year. 14:15 Wow. 14:16 Yeah, and so that was a very kind of nomadic life 14:20 and then from there my parents bought 50 acres 14:24 in Tennessee up on a hill 14:26 and it was very isolated, 14:27 there was no electricity, running water, 14:31 it was one rutted road that led you in and out. 14:33 So no indoor plumbing then. 14:35 No indoor plumbing, no media, no... 14:39 We could just stop with no. 14:42 It was a old house 14:43 and we eventually added addition on to the house 14:48 but we stayed initially in our bus, living in our bus, 14:50 it was a challenge getting the bus up on the hill. 14:52 Was able to do that and we're basically living 14:57 as if it were in the 19th century 15:00 because of how our lifestyle was set up. 15:02 We grew our own food, we made our own clothes, 15:05 we took care of own medical needs, 15:08 we had school at home, 15:10 we had church at home, 15:12 we tried to be as independent as possible. 15:15 So, for a young child, 15:18 it may have been more difficult for your brothers actually 15:20 because they knew a little bit more 15:22 but how did, did you feel content growing up, 15:26 did you feel 15:28 that there had to be something more 15:30 or did you feel isolated. 15:32 What were your feelings as a young child? 15:35 Well, when I was really small, 15:38 I think living in a bus 15:39 when we're living in the state park and stuff, 15:41 everyday I often was lonely, 15:43 you know, maybe sometimes bored 15:45 but I entertain myself very well. 15:49 Spend a lot of time in nature, 15:51 pursuing the micro things of nature like little ants 15:53 and watching them, 15:55 you know, birds and trees. 15:57 My mom kept us really busy with learning about nature 16:00 and things like that. 16:02 So while I was lonely, 16:04 I usually wasn't bored and I knew 16:08 and then when we moved out on to the hill as we called it, 16:12 I felt the isolation, 16:14 but I don't think at that age, 16:16 by the time we moved out there I was nine 16:18 and actually have a picture of me 16:20 there when we first moved out about nine years old, 16:23 and to me it was the way life 16:28 was even though I knew 16:29 it wasn't normal life for other people. 16:31 It was normal life for us. 16:32 So in many ways, I mean, 16:35 you know, some people are sitting here listening 16:37 and thinking oh, this is idyllic, 16:39 you know, to think about you're living out in nature. 16:42 There were a lot of good things. 16:44 You know, we believe, I know a lot of people 16:46 who home school their children now, 16:48 and of course it has grown so much. 16:50 And home schooling can be very good 16:53 but for you all, 16:56 your parents took it to an extreme. 16:59 You were completely isolated from society. 17:03 Yeah, I don't think that was... 17:05 Sometimes things evolve 17:07 and I don't think that was the intent necessarily 17:10 but there was the whole idea of separation from the world, 17:15 because it all came down to two things, 17:17 you know, Jesus is coming, 17:18 there is a time of trouble preceding it, 17:20 we need to separate from the world 17:22 and prepare for Jesus coming. 17:23 Separation and preparation were the themes of what we did. 17:26 And so the further out you move, 17:29 the more isolated you are the better 17:31 because that separates you from worldly influence 17:33 and then if the setting is rugged, 17:37 if the situation is harsh 17:39 and probably need to mention some points, 17:41 some of the daily living conditions 17:43 especially during the heat of the summer 17:45 and the cold of the winter, 17:46 it could be very harsh, 17:48 but all of those things 17:49 then become a matter of preparation 17:52 for the time of trouble. 17:53 Because when the time of trouble comes, 17:54 you're not gonna have convenience anyway, 17:56 you know, so there was a logic to it. 17:59 It wasn't an intent to be extreme 18:02 but rather the evolution of circumstances 18:05 that can lead you there 18:07 and I think that can happen with a lot of people 18:09 except that for most people 18:11 it probably happens more conceptually 18:13 and not circumstantially. 18:15 Not many people are willing or able to make as clean 18:20 and thorough break as my parents did. 18:22 And in a sense I admire and respect that 18:25 because they just went all out for what they believed. 18:28 It doesn't change the fact that the extremeness of it has 18:32 its own impact which is not good, 18:35 but at the same time you can understand the motive. 18:38 You can understand what the objective was 18:40 in what they're doing. 18:41 Now, here is a question, 18:43 I hope it doesn't seem too personal 18:46 but with your parents, 18:49 did they teach you 18:51 to really have a personal intimate 18:54 relationship with the Lord, 18:57 was there is one of total dependence 18:59 upon the Lord 19:00 or they more the type who laid down the rules 19:05 that you know making salvation 19:10 and the interaction with God nothing more than rules. 19:14 Which way did they go? 19:16 I think that's a excellent question 19:18 and I think it leads to a principle that... 19:22 A lot of people tend not to understand 19:24 when we're dealing with balanced 19:25 and imbalanced religion. 19:27 The fact of the matter is what you focus on 19:30 and emphasize is more important 19:32 than whatever you say is more important. 19:35 So yes, we were encouraged 19:37 to have a personal relationship with Christ. 19:40 I remember my father's favorite verse was, 19:42 "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature, 19:44 old things are passed away, 19:45 behold, all things are become new." 19:47 And he used to... 19:48 particularly he used to talk 19:50 about having a personal relationship 19:51 and my mother backed that up. 19:53 However, on a daily basis 19:56 what was emphasized and focused on 19:58 was so rule based. 20:00 So much about every detail of the law 20:06 that the effect was you didn't 20:11 focus on a personal relationship with Jesus. 20:13 You cannot emphasize and focus on two different things 20:16 at the same time. 20:17 And our lifestyle was all about, 20:20 you know, inches. 20:22 By this time we were wearing bonnets I should mention, 20:25 everything was... 20:28 And just to give the illustration 20:29 what I'm saying about the rules. 20:33 First it started with 1 Corinthians 11, 20:35 the way we read and interpreted that. 20:37 Paul actually speaks of it as a custom, 20:40 if you read through those verses at the end, 20:41 he kind of ends his discussion... 20:43 Well, go ahead and referring to those 20:44 who don't know what 1 Corinthians 11 is. 20:46 Yes, 1 Corinthians 11 20:47 talks about a woman covering her hair, 20:48 when she prays or prophesize in public. 20:51 And then of course the Bible says pray without ceasing. 20:55 So we combine those two verses, 20:57 basically women should always 20:59 keep her hair covered in public, 21:01 but if you read that passage 21:03 I think it ends around verse 10 or 11 21:05 from the one through about 10 or 11. 21:08 It emphasizes, he kind of ends it 21:10 with saying that he doesn't, there is no other custom. 21:14 He kind of ends the discussion with it, 21:16 putting in a category of a custom 21:18 but we took it as a law. 21:19 If it was written down as a law, 21:21 so why a bonnet will... 21:23 We read a quote in one of the Testimony volumes 21:26 that says the small bonnet exposing the face 21:29 and head show a lack of modesty. 21:31 We combined that with 1 Corinthians 11, 21:33 then what we have to do is wear the large product 21:36 so we basically wore bonnets 21:40 like Amish or like the Mennonites wear, 21:43 Amish wear, the large ones, 21:46 not the little cap in the back of your head. 21:48 And it came from the way 21:50 we would put scripture together, 21:52 interpret it and then all based it on, 21:57 it says it, then you do it, very literal, 22:01 very absolute interpretation of the Bible. 22:05 And there is nothing wrong 22:06 with interpreting the scripture literally, 22:09 but I think that we always have to 22:12 allow a relationship with God, 22:14 a daily relationship with God to help us to understand 22:18 how our daily life should be worked out 22:20 and then what some of these things 22:22 should end up being for us. 22:23 Well, and you know, it's interesting 22:25 because imbalanced religion 22:28 will focus in on a handful of scriptures 22:32 to the exclusion of others 22:34 like where Christ said we are in the world 22:37 but not off the world, 22:38 so I can think of a dozen scriptures 22:41 that would say, okay, this was not necessary 22:44 to be so isolated away from the world, 22:47 and I mean there is always 22:51 when people are imbalanced, 22:52 they always have 22:54 just that handful of pit scriptures 22:56 that they are holding on to making rules as you said, 23:00 but what kind of effect... 23:03 Do you feel that how old were you 23:06 when you finally got off the hill, 23:08 let me ask that? 23:10 I was 16... 23:12 And what brought you off the hill? 23:14 So my father ended up leaving. 23:18 He left... 23:22 As in leaving the family. As in, right. 23:25 I found out just before he left that he was going. 23:30 He told me that he wouldn't be back, 23:32 I knew he was going. 23:33 He and my older brother 23:34 were going to Houston, Texas to build houses 23:37 so I knew that in that area, 23:39 but they were supposed to be gone 23:41 for few months and return 'cause we needed funds. 23:43 It was, you know, we were poor 23:45 and it was always a struggle to have money 23:48 and to be able to make it, 23:50 so I knew he was going 23:51 but it was just one of the normal, 23:54 you know, at that time becoming 23:55 increasingly more normal 23:57 for my father and brother to go, 23:58 find work come back. 24:00 But he told me he wasn't coming back 24:02 and he didn't explain why, it was... 24:05 I was shocked, I was confused. 24:08 My mother did not know. 24:11 I knew she didn't know because she went over to, 24:14 you know, kiss him goodbye 24:16 and then everything 24:17 that rolled out after that maybe, 24:19 you know, I can see the shock on her face, 24:21 the way he reacted to other things he said, 24:23 and that's the first time 24:24 she realized he wasn't coming back either. 24:28 People always ask me why and over the years 24:30 we did stay in contact over the years, 24:32 he never explained that but he said enough, 24:36 he said he thought that we would be okay, 24:38 and the way I understand it now, 24:41 it was probably a matter of Jesus didn't come 24:45 because we had a very clear timeline in our months. 24:49 So you were doing some dates. 24:51 Yeah, when we moved out there 24:53 that picture you saw was me at about nine, 24:55 and when we moved out there 24:57 I remember being taught that Jesus was gonna come 24:59 within the next five years. 25:01 We had clear dates. 25:03 So it was like what the people went through 25:05 during the great disappointment because that your father 25:08 made all of this radical changes 25:11 and he got out there and then it was like, okay. 25:14 See that's the problem with dates setting 25:16 because the Bible, Jesus Himself said 25:18 no one knows the date or the hour, 25:21 not even Him, only the Father in heaven. 25:24 True and we acknowledge that. 25:26 Nobody knows the day of the hour 25:27 but that doesn't mean 25:29 you can't know the month or year. 25:30 Yeah, okay. 25:31 So that's how we... 25:33 You know, so we know relatively when He is coming 25:35 as we wind up the prophecies, 25:37 as we look at the timeline, we can interpret this and know 25:40 that He is coming right within this time frame, 25:42 might be off by two or three years 25:43 but we know He is coming. 25:45 We don't know the day or the hour, 25:46 but we know and Jesus didn't come. 25:49 His children were getting older, 25:50 my father's children were getting older 25:52 as in I and my brothers. 25:54 And I think that my older brother was 19, 25:57 my oldest brother, the other one was 18, I was 16, 26:02 I think there was the sense of what next, 26:04 there was no plan B. 26:06 They actually went out all out with this 26:08 and then what do you do now, 26:10 and I'm not sure how it hooked up 26:13 with my father's inward thinking but... 26:16 What did your mother do 26:18 because certainly without your father 26:21 and your older brother 26:23 you could not sustain that lifestyle? 26:25 Right, everything was so manual. 26:27 If I were to just detail the process of just, 26:30 you know, being able to heat the house 26:32 is all of this work that involved, 26:33 you know, gathering, kindling and tearing a paper 26:36 and chopping wood and laying fires 26:38 in each of the rooms and, you know, same thing 26:40 if I mention just simple thing like 26:42 making being able to pour out glass of soya milk, 26:45 you know, the process was all manual, 26:47 everything you have to do, you know, 26:49 soak the beans overnight, grind them up, 26:52 milk out the milk 26:55 from the beans in a cheese cloth bag 26:58 and water, boil it on the stove, 27:00 but in order to do that 27:01 you have to have lit a fire and gather the wood 27:04 and done all the things for that, 27:05 and then when you finish doing that 27:07 and finally you boil it and it finally cools, 27:11 then you can't just go put 27:12 what's left over in the refrigerator 27:13 'cause there is no refrigerator, 27:15 you know, so you have to can it, 27:18 you know, that kind of thing 27:19 so there was everything was so manual 27:22 and know we couldn't sustain 27:23 this life without the help of my father and brothers. 27:28 So we actually wrote a lady who lived in Orting, Washington 27:33 and we asked if we could come out there. 27:35 She had been... 27:37 She was also in the lot of the reforms, 27:39 she had started wearing a bonnet too, 27:41 but she lived in a suburban neighborhood 27:43 and so not knowing where else to go, 27:45 we have to go somewhere, 27:47 it was like can we just come there 27:48 for a little bit and figure out 27:49 what to do, and she did welcome us, 27:54 she invited us to come, 27:55 so we end up taking a great HumBus 27:57 and traveling from Tennesee 28:00 all the way out to Orting, Washington, 28:02 it was like almost a three day bus trip and... 28:05 Well, that must have been just a wake up call, 28:08 just being around people on the bus. 28:10 It was, actually there was, 28:13 that I remember we had a six hour layover 28:15 in Chicago at night, 28:17 like we got there at night from midnight to 6 AM, 28:21 and this was the old bus terminal 28:23 that they had in Chicago 28:25 which was known for being irreputable place, 28:28 it was not a good place to be. 28:30 And I, actually a number of things 28:33 almost happened to me that night 28:34 because I didn't know what I was facing, 28:37 I didn't know what I was dealing with, 28:38 I didn't know how to interpret 28:39 the reactions and actions of people. 28:42 When we lived on the hill, 28:44 we would go, you know, into the community 28:47 we would go to various churches and visit sometimes, 28:50 so we had that contact but it wasn't daily contact. 28:53 I didn't have friends, 28:55 I didn't grow up around a lot of people 28:56 so a lot of... 28:58 Your social skills were... 29:01 being not just as far as being polite. 29:03 You know, people usually 29:05 when we think of social skills, it is... 29:08 that's a matter of interpretation 29:10 but it's not just about being polite or charming. 29:13 It's about discernment and knowing who to avoid 29:16 and being able to read people to some degree. 29:21 Yes, there was so much that happened, 29:22 I found out about some of it, 29:24 one lady on the bus actually befriended us 29:26 and told me the next day 29:28 how pick pocketer almost nabbed me, 29:33 I know there was a man that I realized, 29:36 I realized myself 29:37 he was actually trying to get me to go down 29:39 a certain hallway and I happened to notice 29:41 just before I turned down that hall 29:43 that there was nothing down that hall 29:45 except a exit sign and the door. 29:47 And I realized, you know, 29:49 I could tell there was something wrong 29:50 with this guy and so I escape past him, 29:53 ran to the ladies room and stayed there 29:56 until I could find the get away from him 29:57 and go back to my mother and after that... 29:59 When we lived on the hill, we did a lot of exploring. 30:02 We explored the woods and the... you know, 30:04 so exploring was something that I was used to. 30:06 So I was exploring the bus station, 30:09 but it wasn't the kind of place 30:11 where you could just do that and do it safely. 30:14 Especially not in the bonnet and in the long dress 30:16 like a billboard saying I am as green as... 30:19 Here I am this woman who don't like... 30:20 I don't know what I am doing, yeah. 30:23 So you end up 30:25 at this women's home in Washington. 30:27 How did you start going to school? 30:29 Were you still home schooled, what was the transition? 30:32 Um, when we arrived there, 30:34 I didn't know what I was gonna do 30:36 but one thing that had been happening in my life... 30:38 I had home schooled, had kind of evolved 30:41 into just being at home reading books, 30:43 even my brothers 30:45 weren't attending home school anymore. 30:48 And so I was just by myself and I couldn't learn. 30:51 So I had begun to really pray. 30:53 When I was, I just want to back up for a moment 30:55 and say when I was about 14, 30:57 I did accept Jesus 30:58 as my own personal individual savior. 31:01 It doesn't mean 31:02 that I wasn't confused by some of the legalistic black 31:06 and white thinking, I was, 31:07 but I did, the Lord found a way to reach me 31:12 and I surrendered my life to him. 31:14 And one of the things I began to do after that point, 31:17 um, there were things that happened 31:19 that made me question some times, 31:20 are we really... 31:22 Is this the way it's supposed to be. 31:24 Do you ever want to tell me something different God, 31:26 that kind of thing? 31:28 And so I began to pray to go to school, 31:31 two things, I want to learn and I wanted a safe place 31:34 to grow in my relationship with God 31:36 and know for myself what He wanted me to do. 31:38 And I knew I couldn't change at home. 31:40 I couldn't alter anything. 31:42 And so I began to pray about that, 31:45 and so when I knew that we were leaving, 31:48 I said to myself, 31:49 I'm not coming back until I go to school. 31:51 I just knew God would answer my prayer. 31:53 I didn't know how but I knew he was answering my prayer. 31:56 So when we got there, 31:59 when she picked us up at the bus station, 32:01 I asked her in the car 32:02 as soon as we got our luggage in the car, 32:04 I said to her, do you know some place 32:06 where I could go to school, 32:07 and I was explaining that I couldn't go to a regular 32:11 public school or even a regular Adventist Academy 32:14 because the difference between me and regular kids 32:17 were was just too great, but I said, 32:19 I heard of a school that is small 32:22 and is out in the country and they work on a farm 32:26 and they wear dresses 32:27 and I want to go to a place like that, and she said, 32:30 well, you left where those kind of places are, 32:33 there is one back in Tennessee. 32:35 I think it was Cave Springs 32:36 or something that used to exist at that time. 32:38 She said you left where those schools are, 32:41 there is nothing out here and I was like 32:43 oh, no, God I thought you were answering my prayer, 32:46 you know, I was... 32:48 But I just continued to pray, Lord, 32:50 please bless me with a place to go 32:51 and then she mentioned, well, there is someone, 32:53 there is a school in Canada. 32:56 she said, think it's called Fountainview 32:58 and I think they are kind of like that. 33:00 And she said, maybe there is a girl 33:02 that I know that will come to prayer meeting 33:03 on Wednesday night, 33:05 we can ask her about that. 33:06 So from that first Wednesday night 33:08 after I arrived in Washington I was on... 33:12 I mean that's what I was trying to do was find out 33:14 could I go to Fountainview 33:15 because I knew that had to be the place God prepare for me. 33:18 I knew it because I've been asking Him 33:19 and I knew He was answering my prayer. 33:22 There was just no other way I could have left home, 33:24 except for the circumstances 33:25 and I couldn't have controlled the circumstances, He did. 33:28 So I believe that He was opening the door 33:29 for me to go to school. 33:31 So did you go to Fountainview? 33:34 Yeah, I just want to mention one thing though 33:36 because you asked me about 33:38 adjusting to the normal life. 33:43 The first week or two I was there, 33:45 I didn't want to go out the house, 33:47 I'm into this lady's house. 33:48 I didn't want to leave the house 33:50 because it was strange walking out and other, 33:54 there is houses around 33:55 and people could be looking out the window at me, 33:57 I mean, just be able to have somebody look at you 33:59 and you didn't provide for that, 34:04 or you didn't allow it is just happening, 34:06 that seem like a violation of privacy 34:08 and everything else. 34:09 It was something I wasn't used to 34:10 so I stayed in the indoors as much as possible 34:13 and she finally pushed me out one day 34:14 and told me go mow the lawn. 34:17 So then I'm trying to mow the lawn 34:19 and I look up and I see a car coming 34:22 and I flat, I bolted, 34:24 and hid behind the house, I mean, just... 34:26 You know, that's interesting 34:27 'cause I never have heard that before 34:29 and that makes so much sense. 34:32 That makes so much sense. 34:35 We could hear where we lived on the hill, 34:37 we could hear car as much as two miles away approaching. 34:42 We knew from the sound of the car 34:43 who would it be 34:45 if it was someone that frequented the hill. 34:47 We knew who it was and if it was a stranger, 34:50 we knew I mean they couldn't just see us anyway 34:52 from the road and if we were out, 34:54 sometimes we would be out exploring, we'd hide. 34:57 You know, you don't allow yourself 34:59 to be seen unless you choose to be seen. 35:01 So to have this car 35:02 just come driving behind causally, 35:05 that was terrifying and I ran 35:09 and I hid and then of course, 35:12 I looked and I don't see any cars coming 35:14 so I go back out. 35:15 Go back to pushing the lawn mower, 35:17 this was early once in the morning. 35:19 And that happened to glance of my shoulder 35:22 and I saw a car, 35:24 a glimpse of a car coming toward me from behind. 35:27 I ran and hid again behind the house. 35:30 Came back out, 35:32 went back to mowing the lawn 35:33 and I look up here is another car coming. 35:36 And my impulse was to run but at that moment 35:38 I realized I'll never get the lawn mowed 35:41 if I keep running. 35:42 So I didn't 35:44 and I called that my first big real adjustment. 35:46 So how long were you there before you went to school. 35:50 I think it was just a month or two, 35:53 I don't remember it wasn't long weeks, 35:55 not a long time. 35:57 I think it was just a matter of weeks, 35:58 it might have been four to six weeks. 36:01 And then I did get accepted to Fountainview, 36:03 and I actually have a picture, 36:04 one of the pictures I brought today, 36:06 I have a picture of me in my bonnet 36:08 and long dress holding a Bible in my hand, 36:10 and growing up in the hill 36:12 we didn't have a lot of pictures. 36:14 That was something we didn't, you know, photography, 36:18 all of that is like idolatry 36:19 when you're taking pictures of people. 36:21 Fortunately there were people who came up to visit us 36:24 and they took pictures so I have some. 36:27 This one I actually was the first picture 36:29 I think I went and sought for 36:31 because I had to have a picture for my application. 36:33 And there I am and I'm 16, going on 17, 36:37 and I want to make sure they knew I was a Christian 36:39 so I'm holding my Bible 36:42 and I got accepted to Fountainview. 36:44 So when you were there was... 36:47 Let me ask you this 36:49 because I know a little bit about her. 36:53 When did you find? 36:56 I was teaching once on righteousness by faith. 36:58 Let me go back up, 37:00 I was teaching on righteousness by faith, 37:03 and I was telling people 37:04 that as far as living a sanctified lifestyle, 37:07 you know, I could put my hair back in a bun, 37:10 scrub my face and wear long skirts, 37:12 and I can say that 37:13 because I always do 37:17 wear long skirts, 37:19 you know, I mean just by choice it's not, 37:22 this is not a statement of anything, 37:24 I just enjoy long skirts, 37:26 but I've told people, 37:29 you can clean yourself all up on the outside 37:32 but if you don't have that personal relationship, 37:34 that's not sanctification. 37:36 You know, it's from the inside, it's what God does. 37:39 And of course, the writings 37:41 to which you have referred date back 37:44 to the 19th century 37:46 and are to be taken or understood in that way, 37:51 I mean, because they also said 37:54 you're not to dress to set yourself out 37:57 so far apart in other words. 37:59 When did it hit you, how old were you 38:01 when you finally started realizing 38:04 that rules without relationship 38:08 isn't what it was all about 38:10 but that it was relationship, 38:11 it was depending on God, how old were you? 38:14 Well, it was actually a step by step process 38:16 for me to get there. 38:18 I was, you know, it wasn't that long ago, 38:23 a decade or so ago 38:24 before I really understood the rules versus relationship. 38:27 But what I had to be... 38:30 What I needed to break free 38:32 from was a totally rule based thinking 38:35 because when you have that mindset, 38:38 it's all about what is written to the... 38:40 You know, we used to say, 38:41 to the law and to the testimony: 38:43 if they speak not according to this word, 38:44 there is no light in them, and that is true, 38:46 and every jot, every twiddle 38:49 was what matter to us. 38:51 If it said it, it was black and white, 38:52 you do it and there was no degrees, 38:55 there was no degrees of anything. 38:57 It was all a matter of, um, you know, 39:01 to take off my bonnet 39:03 would be just as bad as to commit murder 39:06 or to act immorally or anything else. 39:08 There was no degree of anything and if offend in one point, 39:11 you're guilty of all. 39:13 So that type of thinking made it 39:15 so that unless I was living in that isolated lifestyle, 39:18 you know, in a setting that was prepared for us 39:21 to be able to function like this, 39:23 then you're giving up everything. 39:25 And how to do you function 39:26 when you have to leave an environment like that. 39:29 You know that's why I wanted to go to place 39:31 where I can at least possibly transition, 39:33 but I didn't know 39:34 whether I could take off my bonnet or shorten my dress 39:36 or do anything other than 39:38 and we kept new moons and feast days as well. 39:40 So here I am taking off time from school 39:42 because this is the new moon or the feast day, 39:44 then I have to keep the Sabbath type thing, 39:46 so all of that was on the table like do I give up anything God, 39:51 and it was actually the principle of that school. 39:55 She had gone through an experience a year before 39:57 where she actually had shortened her dress 39:59 to just below the knee 40:01 and allow the girls at the school 40:02 to do the same thing. 40:04 And she understood well, 40:06 my challenge was self righteousness 40:08 and all base thinking and all that. 40:10 She was the one that was able to help me learn 40:12 something new which was principles. 40:15 Praise God. 40:16 And I had never understood 40:18 that there are broad underlying truths 40:22 that don't change. 40:23 Even though laws and rules that govern every day 40:25 can change with time and circumstance, 40:27 principles do not. 40:30 So we got to fast forward 40:32 'cause I just notice how much time we have. 40:35 You've written a book and I'm so glad that you have, 40:40 you got PhD now in communication. 40:44 You have written a book entitled Born Yesterday 40:47 and subtitle says the true story of a girl 40:50 born in the 20th century but raised in the 19th. 40:55 Why other than me telling you to do this. 41:00 For what purpose, or what did you hope to achieve 41:04 by writing the book? 41:06 That's an excellent question, um, 41:08 I think I knew for 41:11 from probably that 41:13 after I got to college and sometime after that 41:16 that I had a unseal story, 41:18 and I remember finally learning about Oprah Winfrey 41:21 and I thought, wow, this could, 41:23 you know, if I wrote her about my life, 41:25 maybe I could get on a show. 41:27 I remember actually thinking that. 41:28 And then I realized it dawned on me, actually I was about 30, 41:32 it wasn't when I was in college, it was later on. 41:34 I was about 30 when it first occurred to me, 41:35 maybe I should write Oprah Winfrey 41:37 see if I can get on her show, 41:38 and my motivation was I needed, 41:40 I was just trying to find someway to make some money. 41:42 Now you were married, were you not at this point? 41:45 I was divorced. 41:46 Married and divorced... 41:47 At what age did you marry? 41:49 I was 24 when I married. 41:50 And was he also a... 41:53 Did he have an imbalanced religion as well? 41:57 He had many challenges in his life 41:59 related to imbalance, um, 42:03 from my viewpoint, 42:04 he was not imbalance because of how I grew up 42:07 so anything was much more stable and normal than that. 42:09 But I think we all, 42:11 a lot of us struggle with extremes 42:14 and with things like that 42:16 and so he had a lot of things that he was struggling with 42:18 and I was in a position to understand that, 42:21 to see that, to help with that and the marriage did not last. 42:25 I was married for just four years on the book, 42:28 we were together for three 42:30 and I ended up being a single mom with two children. 42:33 And when I found myself single, I had a two and half month old, 42:37 and a two and half year old. 42:39 It was a rough time of life, and all of those things 42:42 that happened actually helped me to get to the place 42:44 where eventually relationship 42:46 based understanding was able to develop. 42:50 But it was through the pain and heartbreak of life 42:53 that I began to finally learn 42:54 because a law and a rule won't help you 42:57 and even a principle won't fix this for you. 42:59 You have to have relationship with Jesus to get through. 43:02 Let me ask you a question, Rachel? 43:05 Your book is filled with your story, 43:09 you're great storyteller, so these are, 43:11 it's your story of your life. 43:13 You share some principles and lessons along the way 43:17 but you don't explicate those. 43:19 It's not like... 43:22 Is that the reason why 43:24 is because it wasn't the principles, 43:28 or it wasn't the black and white 43:31 that got you through 43:32 but when you finally got to that point of knowing, 43:37 it's just a principle, is that what helped? 43:40 Um, first of all I wanted to... 43:44 One of the reasons why I wrote the book 43:45 was realizing that there are people 43:47 who have been wounded by bad religion, 43:48 extreme religion, too much religion. 43:50 Maybe they weren't taking an isolation 43:53 and kept away from people 43:54 and raise with some of the extremes 43:55 that I was raised with. 43:57 But the ideological extremes 44:00 can exist even in everyday normal life. 44:02 And I realize there are people 44:04 that have been wounded with religion in this way 44:07 and some of them have on a relational personal basis 44:12 turned away from God. 44:13 And I wanted in sharing my story for them to see, 44:16 be able to see the hand of God, 44:18 leading me through all of that 44:20 back to His heart 44:21 so that I could perceive His heart, 44:23 I can know His heart 44:24 and I could be a living testimony 44:27 of His goodness, of His grace. 44:29 So that was my motivation, actually I was saying earlier 44:32 that originally I wanted to just tell this novel story 44:34 but then I couldn't answer the question as to why. 44:36 I had no answer for and then what, 44:39 after I told the story and I decided 44:41 I would never do it until such time 44:43 as I could answer that question 44:45 and there was a greater purpose. 44:46 So finally overtime as I developed a relationship 44:52 based understanding and daily walk with the Lord, 44:56 it was through that He worked in my life 44:59 to write this story and now I have a purpose 45:01 that goes beyond just simply the novelty of sharing 45:04 an unusual background. 45:06 Did you find that it was more than cathartic 45:10 but that it was empowering to write the story. 45:14 Yes, it was. It was. 45:18 I really in a way that I couldn't have expected, 45:23 I had already dealt with an unusual background 45:26 when I was writing my doctoral dissertation. 45:29 I found out that I could use it 45:30 as a basis for research unbelievably, 45:33 and so I actually did a study 45:35 on adjusting from isolated religious culture 45:38 to the mainstream culture 45:40 and that process, 45:42 I wrote a lot of some of the narratives, 45:44 um, that ended in my book, in my dissertation, 45:47 and that process was very cathartic, 45:49 but what happened when I wrote my book 45:52 was something I could not have expected, 45:53 it was something beyond catharsis, 45:55 I had already gone through that. 45:57 What I had always perceived about my life 46:00 is that it was a collection of individual, 46:05 unattached, broken interrupted pieces. 46:09 And I actually was going to name the book 46:10 originally something like the patch work 46:13 and I wasn't sure it would be patch work quilt 46:15 or patch work stories, 46:17 and the original version of the book 46:18 actually starts out saying 46:20 that my life is a collection of unrelated pieces. 46:24 That's what I started out writing. 46:27 It was not until as everyday as I would write, 46:31 I would ask God to please show me what to write 46:33 and I will work to this process of weaving out 46:36 one tale or another, 46:37 it was a lot of individual pieces 46:40 and then began to put it together 46:42 with rough chronological, you know, order to it. 46:46 It was actually not until I was writing the last chapter 46:50 that it all really began to come together 46:54 and I realize that my life had a plot, 46:57 like it had been planned and that was amazing to me. 47:00 Praise God. 47:01 That was something I could not have realize 47:05 what happened or predicted or anything 47:07 and that was my surprise 47:09 as I began to finish up this book, 47:12 and I actually had to go back 47:13 and write about some low points, 47:15 and once I did that and I was almost to the last... 47:17 I was at the last chapter but couldn't finish it 47:20 and I had to go back, a friend of mine encouraged me 47:22 to go back and write about some of the low points, 47:24 write about some of the things 47:25 that I really would have preferred 47:27 not to put in there but he told me, you know, what, 47:29 no one can appreciate the Joseph 47:32 ascended to the palace 47:33 unless they understand he came from the pit. 47:36 Unless they know about the prison, 47:37 they can't understand, you know, 47:40 the glory of him getting to the second command in Egypt, 47:43 and realizing that's something God had done. 47:46 You've got to share where God has brought you from 47:48 and the experiences in life that have happened 47:51 that have hurt and disappointed and where you failed 47:54 and if you do that, God will bless you, 47:57 and his first blessing as soon as I did that, 47:59 as I went to finish the last chapter, 48:02 it began to all fall together in my head 48:04 and I realize that my life had a plot to it. 48:07 Not just a collection of things. 48:09 Okay so you have... 48:13 You're married, you have two children 48:16 when you are first married, your husband has two children. 48:19 So you are the mother of four children, 48:21 you've actually worked and received your doctorate, 48:25 God has taken you to amazing places 48:28 but you say in the book that the story continues, 48:32 what's happened to you since you wrote the book 48:35 and the title of the book is Born Yesterday. 48:37 What's happened to you since, Rachel? 48:41 Well, most recently about it almost a year ago now, 48:44 in January I had a sun onset of blindness 48:47 and then challenges with walking 48:49 and so I recovered from that, 48:51 it turns out I have multiple sclerosis. 48:53 Oh, bless you. 48:54 And as far as I'm concerned what that's about 48:56 is teaching me that my strength. 48:59 I can't depend on it but God's strength is there. 49:01 His strength is made perfect in my weakness 49:03 and that's what He is teaching me everyday. 49:05 Amen. 49:06 And I know that we're out, nearly out of times 49:08 but I do know there is a lot more things going on, 49:10 so I think we can expect another wonderful book 49:13 from you sometime in the near feature. 49:15 What we would like to do Rachel brought a trailer on her book, 49:19 we'd like to show that to you just now. 49:24 If my life were a movie, 49:27 no one would believe it. 49:38 When I was just six years old, 49:41 my parents began to separate 49:43 from society as they follow 49:45 their every increasingly strict religious views. 49:50 We ended up living on 50 acres in Tennessee 49:54 on abandoned hilltop in an old house. 49:57 Isolated from other people and without electricity, 50:02 running water, television, telephones. 50:05 When my brother was horribly burnt in a gasoline fire, 50:10 we didn't take him to the hospital, 50:11 we handled all of our own problems at home. 50:15 I was home schooled, we grew our own food, 50:18 we made our own clothes 50:20 and we lived in this way 50:22 while we waited for the world to come to an end. 50:27 When I was 16, 50:29 I found myself forced to live in a world 50:31 that I was not prepared to living. 50:33 I ran from passing cars, when I was asked to mow a lawn, 50:38 I did know anything about shampoo and conditioner, 50:42 or how to strand my hair 50:44 when I finally took off the bonnet, 50:46 and I struggled with school 50:48 and with regular socio-cultural norms. 50:51 And I didn't know a lot about guys, 50:54 so I ended up marrying the first man that I dated 50:58 and when that was shattered on the rocks of divorce, 51:01 I went through heartache, confusion, pain 51:05 and to wonder if I had been abandoned by God 51:10 but He never abandoned me. 51:21 Born Yesterday is a testimony 51:24 of God's faithful restorative loving care 51:27 and what I hope for when you read this book, 51:29 I hope you find in its pages a testimony, 51:33 the story that will inspire you to discover in your own life 51:38 how God always is working together for your good, 51:43 to make you whole, to restore and to heal you. 52:01 It's a marvelous book 52:02 and I know you'll enjoy reading it. 52:04 Rachel also come out to churches and speaks. 52:06 If you'd like to get in touch with her, 52:09 here is the information. 52:13 If you would like to know 52:15 how to get a copy of the book Born Yesterday, 52:18 or if you'd like to contact Rachel, 52:20 you can do so by writing Rachel William Smith, 52:24 PO Box 134, Berrien Springs, Michigan 49104. 52:30 That's Rachel William Smith, 52:32 PO Box 134, 52:34 Berrien Springs, Michigan 49104. 52:38 You may also call 269-588-0671. 52:45 That's 269-588-0671. 52:49 Or order the book online at RachelWilliamsSmith.com. 52:54 That's RachelWilliamsSmith.com. |
Revised 2016-11-28