Participants: Charles Martin, Rita Martin, Kathy Matthews, Rachel Martin, Sarah Martin
Series Code: TAH
Program Code: TAH000168
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00:30 Welcome to Thinking About Home.
00:32 I am Kathy Matthews, 00:33 I am glad you're back with us today. 00:36 Our guest today are Charles and Rita Martin, 00:38 they're from Minnesota and they're Bible workers 00:40 there in Minnesota. 00:42 And we have their whole family 00:43 together today, don't we? Amen. 00:45 And it's good to see all of you, 00:46 I like to see ZRachel and Sarah's 00:48 smiling face, big smile. 00:51 I think it's fun because when I say Rachel and Sarah, 00:54 it's our daughters named, Rachel and Sarah, 00:56 and it just switched. 00:58 Our older one is Sarah, and younger one is Rachel, 01:00 it's just the opposite with you. 01:03 I invited you because I thought 01:05 you had wonderful story of a second family, 01:08 for your... for your lives you've raised 01:12 a family before, didn't you? Yes. 01:14 And then the little ones came along. 01:16 The story is quite interesting 01:19 I think that you'll enjoy it too. 01:22 We wanna start, I think, with why you decided 01:27 to become better parents in your home. 01:33 And it had some decisions that were involved 01:36 on getting rid of the business, 01:37 didn't it, Charles? 01:38 Why don't you tell me about that? 01:40 Yes, we really came to the... 01:43 to the decision based on a lot of the frustration 01:47 we had in raising our older children 01:49 and we decided that we had did, 01:52 done quite a few things wrong. 01:53 And the Lord blessed us with another chance. 01:56 We're a blended family, Rita and I each brought 01:58 three children of the marriage 02:00 and then we had Rachel and Sarah. 02:02 And just so thankful for this new chance 02:06 to raise them again. 02:07 And yet we realized that we were getting 02:09 started off on the wrong foot again. 02:11 Oh, really? And following into some 02:14 of the old patterns that we had before. Right. 02:16 Well, I owned a business that I had a number of years, 02:21 recycling oil, it covered about 7 states and, 02:24 and 10 employees and it was just 02:26 a mile a minute pace. 02:28 And we were realizing that, that it was getting 02:31 so busy that we were going to be unable to run 02:34 the race of the Christian life. 02:35 Right. And we really felt impressed 02:39 that we ought to offer it for sale. 02:41 And the Lord worked 02:42 a wonderful miracle in our lives. 02:43 The moment we offered it up, we made one phone call 02:46 and as a result of that, it sold for cash. 02:48 Somebody took it. 02:49 And took the heavy load 02:51 of that indebtedness and the, 02:52 and the weary crushing weight that, that was. 02:55 And put our out of death and brought us 02:57 a nice place in the country. 02:58 And we just decided to get away and to simplify. 03:02 Where did you move to? 03:03 We went to the Kalispell, Montana area. 03:06 Is that right? I know folks up there. 03:08 Way back in the wilderness, but so far back 03:12 that if you hurt a car, 03:14 it was someone else lost again. 03:17 Or you knew they were coming to visit you right. Right. 03:20 And I wanna clarify that we have 03:21 6 beautiful older children, and one of the things 03:25 we regret was our time 03:27 that we did not give to them. 03:28 And that was so important about selling the business, 03:30 as we knew we were able to give our time to, 03:34 to the two little girls and to our older ones 03:36 who still need us. 03:37 When we made this announcement 03:39 that we were going to sale a business 03:41 and we were going to have a lot much lower income. 03:44 Right. But we're gonna trade that out 03:46 in exchange for the time. 03:48 We decided that if we lived another hundred years 03:51 and looked back, we'd never say we wished 03:53 we spend one more day in the office. 03:56 And so... We thought our older children 03:58 would really mock at that, because they were used 04:00 to a higher lifestyle. 04:01 We knew this was gonna make 04:02 a lot of sacrifices on their part. 04:05 And indeed they were very pleased 04:07 and very supportive and willing to take 04:09 the time over the money. That's good. 04:12 So the effect this had on us was, 04:14 was a real simplifying of our lives. 04:16 We suddenly found ourselves 04:18 with time to give back to the family, 04:20 time to go out in the evening 04:21 and play Dare Base or whatever it was. 04:23 Something else... And it took 04:26 on a new bonding experience with our children, 04:28 we had never been able to have before. 04:30 It was just a real beautiful time with them. 04:33 So those are the things that you chose to do 04:34 differently was the moving out, 04:37 the time with your children. 04:39 Okay, what did it do for these little girls? 04:43 They've, they've had the same experience also, 04:47 the time has just made a bonding 04:49 of our hearts together in so many ways. 04:52 We have felt God's grace and His mercy 04:55 and giving us our children hearts back again. Amen. 04:58 And we've discovered that's what we really 05:01 wanted all along was their hearts. 05:04 The attitude of the heart, you want to reach 05:07 their heart so that they will have 05:08 the attitude of what... 05:13 Well one of the, one of the problems 05:15 been with our older children was mixing so much peer 05:20 interaction with them constantly. 05:22 And we said, what is the, 05:23 what is the advantage of that? 05:26 And obviously there is no advantage to that. 05:28 As the child is younger, they really don't need 05:31 that peer inter relations. 05:33 But we noticed that the children 05:36 who were raised were that's mostly, 05:39 predominantly adult interaction, 05:43 they don't take as much. 05:45 Notice of the peer, Their cues from their peers... 05:48 And when they get older, 05:50 when their peers look matured more, 05:52 then they're more able to relate to them. 05:54 Right. So there is a time when maybe they can 05:56 or can't relate to them very well, 05:58 but later when they're more mature they can and... 06:02 I find that if they're too much relating 06:06 to their peers, they have difficulty 06:08 relating to adult or elderly adults. 06:12 Sure. Or young children, 06:13 but if they have related well 06:16 and long in relationship with their parents. 06:19 And if it's a good godly relationship, 06:22 I'm talking about, you know, this doesn't happen 06:24 in every situation of life. 06:26 But if its good godly relationship, 06:29 and they related well to their parents. 06:31 Then they can relate no matter 06:32 what age group there is. Yeah, yes. 06:33 Now whether it's little babies, 06:35 little children, their own peers, 06:37 adults or elderly, whatever it maybe, 06:40 I find that case. 06:41 And we wanted the privilege of being able to guide them 06:43 during those rough water years 06:45 with the cross road decisions they make. 06:47 We wanted to be able to be a friend enough 06:51 to them that they could ask us and not their peers. 06:54 Right, right, and have that trust going on there, 06:57 that relationship going on there. 06:59 How about, now these little girls 07:02 always did your little girls I'll call them, 07:04 these little girls, I'm sorry, 07:05 I talk to you like you're not even in the room. 07:08 Did they always earn obedience 07:10 from the very beginning then since you had 07:12 a second chance family? 07:14 Yes, definitely not we've started older with, 07:17 with these other children that's going down 07:21 the same road really, 07:22 but we had started with the first. 07:23 Yeah. Proverbs 3 verse 7 is a wonderful text 07:26 that we began to look at. 07:29 It says "Be not wise in your own eyes." 07:32 And this was a powerful text because we realized 07:34 that we were starting into a process 07:38 where we would allow our children to argue back 07:41 with us many times. 07:42 And this was probably something every 07:45 parent faces all the time, 07:47 but it was very frustrating and... 07:50 It was really a child in charge syndrome a lot. 07:54 You know, Rachel especially, when she was little, 07:55 she had six older siblings just all trying 07:58 to attend to this little general. 08:01 Yes. And the Lord started working on our hearts 08:05 and calling us to an obedience 08:07 and not allowing that to go on. 08:10 Because like Proverbs says 08:12 "It does make them wise in their own eyes." 08:14 And one of the ways we started doing 08:16 that was calling them on that and asking 08:20 them to... Well, usually we'd not allow them 08:24 to get the reward that they're asking 08:27 for when they started into argument like that. 08:29 Right. Okay, what do you mean exactly, 08:32 give me a little illustration? 08:33 What do you mean exactly about wise in your own eyes? 08:36 Didn't we talk about this in the parenting class? 08:38 Yeah, I think it's brightly thought 08:41 we were trying to get them to express themselves. 08:44 But in essence, it was getting them 08:46 to be wise in their own eyes, 08:47 they were making the decisions 08:48 and calling the shorts. 08:49 And mom and dad looked smaller and smaller 08:52 and they looked bigger and bigger 08:53 in their own eyes. 08:54 Okay, you were thinking about having them 08:56 express themselves, but in reality 08:58 you were allowing them to make all the decisions. 09:00 Yes. Okay. 09:01 Yes, what color cup do you want, honey, 09:02 what kind of juice do you what, honey. 09:03 And they were becoming powerful. 09:05 Yes, well and that's not to say, 09:07 you can't ask what a child wants. 09:09 Right. You wanna clarify that. 09:10 Yes, right. But it was a constant, 09:13 go head, it was a constant thing or what? 09:15 Yeah, it just became child in charge 09:17 and we realized that it was making her 09:19 very powerful and... 09:20 Okay, all right. 09:22 And another, another principle 09:23 we came under convection about 09:25 was the first time obedience. 09:28 The idea that we need to deal with frustration 09:33 for five times before we get obedience, 09:35 for calling them to come to dinner 09:36 and they're playing with their toys. 09:38 And they will calmly keep on playing with their toys 09:42 until it maybe the third or fourth time 09:43 when we start to really get angry. 09:46 And they have a build in sensor 09:48 when they know when they pushed me 09:49 past that brink. 09:51 And now is the time to come around and obey. 09:55 And we started realizing that. 09:57 That these simple things that if you could put them 09:59 into affect, you realized what? 10:02 Well, I guess it boils down Kathy to, 10:04 to the roots of the problem 10:07 I think it lies in our own hearts. 10:09 In what I say is that our own conceptions 10:14 of God conveyed to our conceptions 10:17 of what we expect out of our children. 10:19 Right. Our relationship to Him, 10:22 if we expect that God requires obedience 10:25 from us the first time we're asked, 10:27 then we would give that same thing 10:29 to our children and ask them to do the same. 10:32 You know, go head, go ahead. 10:33 Oh, often times we find ourselves, 10:37 often times I would feel like maybe 10:40 some kind of chastisement, there's an order 10:41 because of not coming into obedience. 10:45 But the conversation itself would convince me that. 10:49 Because many times I would come 10:51 to Rachel and Sarah and say, now what's the infraction 10:54 here and they would explain and... 10:57 So, you explained it to them first, 10:58 so they understood what was expected of them. 11:00 Right. And then you came to them with a question of... 11:03 Well, then the idea is, you know, 11:06 the Heavenly Father is looking down 11:08 and he sees me, and He is asking me 11:10 to obey and He also asked me to make you obey. 11:13 And if I'm out of compliance with the Heavenly Father 11:16 in my own heart. 11:17 Then I'm also in disobedience. 11:20 That's exactly. And that leaves us 11:21 no other choice but to have a consequence, 11:24 this believe that there is no consequence 11:26 but disobedience, it's rampant 11:28 throughout the whole world... 11:29 Well we see it in our society, don't we. 11:31 Yes. That I should not be blamed for my 11:33 or have a consequence for my own choices. 11:35 But we need to learn that we do. Don't we? 11:38 Yes, now let's look at First Samuel 15, 11:41 just a moment we could.. It says, 11:44 "to obey is better than sacrifice." 11:46 This was given when Saul was asked to make 11:49 a sacrifice and to wait for Samuel for three days. 11:53 Well, he didn't telling him 11:54 how long he was supposed to wait. 11:55 But he waited and waited and Samuel never showed up, 11:59 until he went ahead and went on with him, 12:01 with his own ways, was wise in his own eyes 12:03 so to speak and didn't get that first time obedience. 12:06 And the next part of that is in the next verse, 12:09 which is very interesting. 12:10 Because he really nails it down, 12:12 when he says "For rebellion is as sin of witchcraft" 12:16 and that's what we're dealing 12:17 with if we don't have first time obedience 12:19 is the sin of rebellion. 12:20 And he, isn't that powerful It is. 12:23 When he says that it's witchcraft, 12:25 it's the same as. 12:26 Same as, you don't want to, 12:27 you don't want that confused please. 12:30 Yeah, right. Is in principle or the. 12:32 God deals with it, looks at it with the same, 12:34 with the same severity as he would with witchcraft. 12:37 Yeah, okay, all right, that's very clear... 12:38 And other principle that men have lied to us, 12:40 and the Lord laid this on my heart 12:41 in my devotion time. 12:43 It was an idea to incorporate. 12:45 I had not even heard 12:46 the Ezzo's talking about this yet. 12:49 Now, who were the Ezzo's? 12:51 Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo. 12:52 We had received some tapes from a friend, 12:56 Growing Kids God's Way, and been richly blessed 12:59 in listening to them. 13:00 In fact, I had received them myself 13:01 on a trip alone with the girls, 13:03 Charles not with me. 13:04 And I stopped halfway on the trip 13:06 with these borrowed set of tapes 13:08 and called the Ezzos and said, 13:09 please meal me one. 13:10 Have it, have it here when I get here. 13:13 Because I knew that Charles 13:14 would be thrilled to hear them. 13:16 But all I know is before I had heard the principle 13:19 the Lord had laid on my heart, 13:20 why not have them say, yes mother, or yes father, 13:24 when we asked them to do something. 13:26 And it turned out to be one of the biggest blessings 13:28 in raising them, because we trained them 13:30 to say yes mother when I ask you... 13:32 Aren't these the simplest things? 13:33 They're simple. 13:34 These are the simplest things. 13:36 But it's so beautiful. Yeah. 13:37 So, we're talking about having them, 13:39 when you ask for a response from them, 13:41 you expect them to respond to you. 13:44 Right. By saying, you know, 13:45 in a respectful way. 13:47 And then what does, what does this do for them? 13:51 I mean, I know what it does for them, 13:52 maybe the viewers may have some questions 13:54 about what it does for them, but, go ahead. 13:57 A lot of people would think this is a tyrannical type 14:00 of request to say yes, they turn you into robot. 14:03 And really that isn't it at all, 14:04 the idea of yes mother, yes father is simply to say, 14:08 I acknowledge and I've heard. Yes. 14:10 And then if they don't come into obedience 14:13 that first time, you have a knowledge 14:15 in your own mind that they have 14:17 indeed heard what you've said. 14:18 That's right. And it's a way to know 14:21 that you're not punishing them unjustly. 14:23 Yes. It also give them a forward momentum, 14:26 I just said, yes mummy, here I go obeying. 14:28 Yes, right okay. 14:30 Then that happens in the mind, 14:31 there is something about that. 14:32 Yes. That happens in the mind, 14:33 they've acknowledged you and they've acknowledged you 14:35 positively, correct? 14:37 Right. Right and we're told that, 14:39 that if we make a, if we're attempted 14:41 in some way and we make a positive 14:44 statement in our own mind, that that's three fourths 14:47 of the way to overcoming that temptation right there. 14:50 Amen, so you're training them. 14:51 Exactly. This is training, yes. 14:54 Right, so that's beautiful that you're setting 14:56 something like this up. 14:57 That you give them three fourths 15:00 of a victory already by asking them to say yes. 15:02 I remember when we were going through 15:03 the parenting class together. 15:05 And I asked Charles to give us a testimony 15:07 and it was so tender. 15:09 And I don't wanna put you on the spot, 15:11 but can you remember anything about 15:13 the testimony you gave. 15:14 Well, it's a precious time to be able to come apart 15:17 and take part of this class, there at the Black Hills 15:20 that you were teaching. 15:22 And we had already put some of the principles 15:27 in practice already. 15:28 But the, I remember that especially what, 15:32 with the fruits of the first time 15:33 obedience were, when it swept over me 15:37 and just swept over my soul as I realized, 15:40 that suddenly I liked my kids. 15:43 Oh my, they don't have to be the terrible 15:46 twos do they, they don't have to be. 15:49 And they don't have to be someone 15:50 that you can't honestly wait to get out of the house. 15:53 Right. There is somebody you love to have around. 15:54 Where more, other people began to enjoy our children. 15:57 Oh, and that's a principle in itself. Yes. 15:59 Isn't it? Don't, it looks like you have 16:01 something more to say, 16:02 but don't give up that one, okay. 16:04 Well, I don't want to infer that I didn't enjoy my kids, 16:06 but I did realize how much more 16:09 I could enjoy them 16:10 and the deeper experience we could have. 16:11 It was just such a bounding experience 16:14 bringing us both together. 16:15 When they came into obedience. 16:17 But the incredible thing 16:18 was how much happier they were. 16:20 I mean, I can remember some of the biggest smiles 16:23 on Rachel's face in her entire life 16:25 where from this experience. 16:27 From what? First time obedience. 16:29 First time obedience. 16:30 Can you explain that, Rachel? 16:32 What is first time obedience? 16:36 Well, it's when you obey on first call. 16:42 Okay, you wanna say it again, 16:44 because your hand's in front of your face. 16:46 It's what? 16:47 It's when you obey on first call. 16:53 And when mommy and daddy used to ask you 16:57 to obey before, how did you always respond? 17:04 Six and seventh time. 17:08 And is it better now then it was before? 17:11 What was it like before? 17:12 What your descriptive word that it was like before 17:15 you were taught this. 17:17 Miserable. Miserable, 17:19 that's the word she uses, it's miserable. 17:22 And what is it, 17:23 why do you feel like it's better now? 17:27 I just feel a lot better now, 17:29 because I know I'm doing the right thing. 17:32 Then you use a word with me and I told you that 17:35 that we taught our little girls that 17:37 when they were younger, no maybe I was telling you 17:39 that I don't know if I told you that Rachel. 17:41 But there was something you said that you feel now. 17:44 You feel something. 17:46 Do you remember that? I feel a lot cleaner. 17:48 You feel a lot cleaner. Amen. 17:50 Now isn't that language of the Bible. Amen. 17:55 It is, isn't it? 17:56 Forgiven, obey, obedience, clean, 18:01 free of whatever is burdening you, 18:04 especially your own disobedience. 18:08 These are simple things. Yes. 18:09 But when it's couched in the language 18:11 of the Bible, isn't it. 18:13 Then you're teaching them 18:14 to relate back and forth to Christ. 18:17 And I think, as they get older, 18:18 this was always my philosophy 18:19 and I think it came Biblically, 18:21 that as they got older they understood 18:23 what was happening for their sake 18:25 between them and Christ. 18:27 Sure. You know, in redemption. 18:29 Amen. Don't you think? 18:30 Yes. Absolutely. 18:32 One of the things that goes right along hand in hand 18:34 with this is the appeal process. 18:36 Because it prevents 18:38 the child from being frustrated. 18:42 Right. For instance, if they're playing a game 18:44 and you know the, they know that you've 18:47 already told them that every time before 18:49 they come to, down for dinner. 18:50 Right. That they need to clean up 18:51 their toys or something.. 18:52 Right. And yet you come and say, 18:53 come down right away, time for dinner. 18:56 They're in disobedience on one 18:59 or the other either way. 19:01 Right. But the appeal process says, 19:04 mother, father, may I appeal. 19:06 It's a respectful way to say we need to backup 19:09 and look at this. 19:10 And it keeps it at high respect 19:12 and yet it builds interaction 19:14 between father and mother and child. 19:16 And what I found is that you don't lose dignity 19:19 if you can stop and they can respectfully 19:21 ask you something. 19:23 Now is this to be used, now we also want to, 19:27 we want to say that this was learned 19:29 out of the Growing Kids God's Way, wasn't it? 19:31 Right. And then we discussed it 19:32 more in our parenting class. 19:34 And I just want to put that 19:37 in there for the sake of Ezzo's, 19:38 who developed this and had done a wonderful job at it. 19:41 Right. Amen. Amen. A wonderful blessing. 19:42 And it's a blessing. 19:43 And, but we did that in our home years ago. 19:48 And the appeal processes is not for every little excuse 19:52 a child wants to make. 19:53 And they cannot if they're just trying 19:55 to get out of the job, make an appeal. 19:57 So it has to have some what, it has to have added 20:00 information that maybe mother and dad 20:02 didn't know and it saves 20:03 the dignity of mother and dad. 20:04 Right. And then you can back off 20:06 of whatever you've told them to do 20:08 if they have done they have approached you 20:11 in a respectful way with information 20:13 that you didn't know, is that correct? 20:14 That's right. 20:15 Okay, and the appeal process is a blessing. 20:20 But you don't know how to dothis things 20:22 sometimes unless you put a name to it, 20:24 isn't that sound, Rita? Right, that's right 20:25 It seems like you have to put a name to it 20:27 and then describe it and say, hey, 20:29 that sounds good, we can work that out. 20:31 I think I could incorporate that into my family. 20:33 Right. Oh, now what else did you learn? 20:37 Now, another one that really has been 20:39 a blessing in our family 20:40 is the preciousness of others. 20:42 And that would be a whole program of it's own. 20:46 Wouldn't it, there's scripture 20:48 that goes right along with that 20:49 in Philippians 2 and, go ahead. 20:51 Yes. Yes, but in your own family 20:54 to treat each other as precious, 20:56 by cleaning up behind ourselves, 20:59 doing those things that just show 21:00 common courtesy and respect. 21:02 Right. But then, so many things that, 21:04 as we began to study this had started 21:06 to change our own lives. 21:07 For instance, like putting your grocery card back. 21:10 In the cart corral at the store. 21:13 Oh, yes, that was a big one, wasn't it? 21:15 And for me, stopping at stop signs, 21:18 that way out in the country 21:19 where no one ever saw you anyway. 21:21 You know, you're just talking about 21:23 being courteous or honest even. 21:25 But the preciousness of others 21:27 and how can we teach our children 21:28 that if we're outside of it, 21:30 outside of God's will in our own lives. 21:32 And that is definitely something that 21:35 it hits right home on everybody doesn't it, 21:37 because of our simple nature 21:38 we think so much of ourselves. 21:41 Yes. That we really don't want 21:42 to think of others at all. 21:44 And why is it, it seems 21:46 we have to teach about others? 21:50 Because we're inborn selfishness. 21:51 Yes. Inborn selfishness, isn't that? 21:53 It just comes naturally. It's the truth, isn't it? 21:55 It doesn't have to be taught... 21:56 It doesn't, yeah, those precious sweet babies. 21:59 And you're wise in their own eyes 22:00 that you're teaching them. 22:02 You know, just makes that worse, 22:04 because they learned me, 22:05 I'm the only one I need to think about. 22:06 Right, okay. 22:08 Oh, there is two, three other things. 22:09 There is a couple little stories about the kids 22:11 that I want you to tell us about, 22:14 especially about some scripture 22:16 the hoary head. Okay. 22:17 And explain the hoary head 22:18 in case people don't understand those words? 22:22 Who's gonna do it? In Leviticus, 22:24 it talks about rising up before the hoary head. 22:27 And we like that, we like the concept of teaching 22:30 our children to respect their elders. 22:33 So, we had been working with the little girls on that 22:35 and the three of us were just 22:37 entering that health food store. 22:40 And I was stoop down, blocking the doorway, 22:42 tying Sarah's shoe and she was facing outward. 22:45 And she saw a woman coming that I didn't see, 22:48 and she said, mother, 22:49 there is an older lady coming in the door. 22:51 But I was busy tying and didn't hear her 22:54 or listen to her well. 22:55 And she said, mother, she is really, really old. 22:59 And so I stood up, 23:00 kind of embraced and she said oh, she said. 23:03 She heard that. Yes, she heard that. 23:04 The lady heard that. 23:05 She said oh, don't worry about it, she is right. 23:07 I am really, really old. 23:09 But she was trying to be respectful. 23:11 She was learning the concept. 23:13 Yes this is a hoary head and we need to respect her. 23:17 So really what is talking about the gray hairs? 23:19 Older, the gray hairs. 23:20 The older, the respect for your elders. Right. 23:22 Okay, and you know, we don't always have to have gray hair 23:25 for you to be able to respect us. That's right. 23:28 And we hope that we can make it 23:30 to where you can respect us. That's right. 23:32 Sometimes older ones don't like it 23:34 where it's easy for you. That's true. 23:36 But there is more, what is another story? 23:39 Well, another story was we were talking about, 23:42 in family worship about. 23:46 Well, we started, instituted 23:48 a new practice in family worship, 23:49 where we at the close of everyday, 23:52 we go around the circle 23:53 and everyone confesses to each other. 23:56 And it's been a real blessing in our lives 23:59 to be able to do that. 24:01 To have that confession time, real healing and it has to, 24:05 we've taught the girls that it has be specific 24:07 and to the point for it be real confession. Yes. 24:12 Well, the other day we were teaching Rachel 24:16 about this concept 24:17 and the Holy Spirit worked on her heart 24:19 and when we were at church the other day. 24:22 She went up to one other older ladies there 24:25 and said, I have something I like to confess to you. 24:28 And what happened? 24:31 Well, she didn't quite have the concepts down right yet, 24:35 the Holy Spirit was working in her heart. 24:37 But she confessed to this old lady 24:40 that she had some wicked thoughts 24:43 or evil thoughts she told her about that. Oh, no. 24:46 The older lady didn't quite understand 24:49 exactly what was being said, 24:50 I think the Lord blessed in that. 24:52 The lady didn't quite grasp what was going on, okay. 24:56 Didn't, wasn't able to catch it. 24:57 But afterwards she was tearfully telling us 25:02 about this confession. 25:03 Who Rachel? Rachel was. Yes. 25:04 And we were just sharing her joy 25:06 that she's starting to get this concept down, 25:11 that we do need to confess our sins to those... 25:13 What happened the next day though? 25:15 Did you say someone called you. 25:17 Yes, the next day, that little lady called and said, 25:20 your child is just so precious. 25:22 She said, I didn't catch exactly what it was 25:25 that she was trying to do, 25:26 but I knew that it was a very moving thing 25:28 she was trying to tell me. 25:30 And said, I'm so appreciative of your children 25:35 and what they're learning. 25:36 You know, I discovered that several years ago 25:39 and that our children when they, 25:42 I didn't discover this from Growing Kids God's Way, 25:44 I didn't, the Lord showed me this on my own. 25:46 When our children have bumped someone or had an accident, 25:50 and they say oh, I'm sorry. 25:52 And it was simple and it was not moral, 25:54 it was not a moral problem. 25:56 Then saying, I'm sorry was okay. 25:59 But to say forgive me, 26:02 when it was something that was wrong 26:05 or that they needed to ask forgiveness for, 26:07 was completely different then just saying, I'm sorry. 26:12 But the words forgive me would again, 26:16 teach them what redemptive language, 26:20 the plan of redemption. Right. 26:23 It would help them in biblical language 26:26 in their relationship with Christ at a later day, 26:28 and as they worked with people, 26:31 it would help in conflict management. 26:33 It would help in a lot of areas. That's right. 26:35 As a conflict, rather resolving conflict. 26:38 And so this was something that we felt 26:41 was really important to distinguish between, 26:43 oh I am sorry. Right. 26:45 Or would you forgive me, please. 26:48 Gives that person a chance to respond. 26:50 And make a decision. And make a decision. 26:52 Well, you know, there is other things we could tell. 26:54 Isn't there? Oh, yes. 26:55 There is lot of things I think we could tell. 26:58 But I don't think we have anymore time, 27:00 but I thank you for coming all the way and joining us. 27:03 And thank you, Rachel, for your part. 27:05 And thank you, Sarah, for your part. 27:09 And do you enjoy mommy and daddy better now too. 27:12 And they enjoy you very much. 27:14 Well, it's a sweet thing 27:15 to have a sweet family, isn't it. 27:17 And to have harmony in the home. 27:18 The blessing of the Lord. 27:19 Well, let's pray for your family, 27:23 you join us in our prayers. 27:24 I'm going to ask Rita to pray for us 27:27 and maybe there's somethings in this program 27:30 that you've really enjoyed. 27:31 If you have, write or call 3ABN about it. 27:35 And join us again on Thinking About Home. 27:39 Dear Father God, thank you so much 27:42 for the privilege of raising a family to your glory. 27:46 Lord, guide us with your eye and order our footsteps. 27:49 We want to please you in raising these families. Amen. 27:53 We thank you for all your blessings 27:55 and for the principles you've given us to work with. 27:58 Please Father, attend us now. |
Revised 2014-12-17