Participants: Richard O'Ffill, Kathy Matthews
Series Code: TAH
Program Code: TAH000155
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00:32 Welcome to Thinking About Home, I'm Kathy Matthews
00:34 and I'm glad that you're back with us. 00:37 We have today with us Richard O'Ffill from 00:40 Florida Conference of Seventh-day Adventist. 00:43 And we're just enjoying ourselves on this program 00:45 talking about things of life and family. 00:47 We sure and about, about reality. 00:51 Of course we you know, we can get together 00:52 and talk about an ideal and of course 00:55 we don't wanna lower the stick you know you can 00:57 lower the stick to the point where you don't 00:59 even you can, you can just walk, walk over it. 01:01 Right, we don't want to do that. 01:02 And, and I think of where it says as high as the, 01:04 higher than the highest human thought 01:05 can reach is God's idea for His children. 01:09 So, I think the fact that we have high ideals 01:10 for our self, ourselves doesn't mean that 01:15 that we can't set down and evaluate how are 01:18 we coming along toward that ideal. 01:19 Yes. And, and I know that that in my life 01:23 I missed the mark. And I'm not gonna boast of it, 01:27 I'm not gonna say, well you know, nobody gets it 01:30 and they were all that way and nobody is perfect. 01:33 I'm not perfect, but I wish I was. Yes. 01:37 And I wanna press on toward the mark of the 01:38 high calling of God in Christ Jesus. 01:40 Well, we wouldn't get there, would we? 01:41 wish we were or strife for it? How could you 01:45 hit a target if you don't put one up? Right, right. 01:48 But you and I've been talking in, in the programs 01:53 that we've been together about our children 01:56 and I'm particularly talking as a parent with 02:01 four grown children and with eight grandchildren 02:03 and not really a happy story along the way. 02:07 Now, now you would say, well Dick, 02:10 it sounds like all your children are thugs, 02:12 thieves and criminals. No. And that's not the case. 02:15 Listen, I have children that it couldn't be 02:18 be better. Marriages made in heaven I have 02:22 and I rejoice for that. And I think sometimes 02:25 we need to remind ourselves of this I know 02:29 I need to, but. Keep things in perspective. 02:32 Keep things in perspective but, but you know 02:34 a parent tends to focus on the sick child. 02:36 I understand that. In other words I can have 02:39 ten well children and one sick one and 02:41 guess what I, what I talk to you about. 02:42 Well, but isn't, isn't, doesn't the Lord 99. 02:46 Very good. Right and he went after 02:48 the one that was lost. That's right. 02:49 And there, but keeping things in perspective 02:52 makes me think of something, can I tell it? 02:54 Please. Have you ever heard the story of 02:56 daughter writing home from college? 02:58 Tell us all, remind us. Writing home from 03:02 college and she says, mom I just want to let you 03:04 know that I'm, I'm pregnant now and 03:08 I'm you know, I'm going to get married soon 03:12 and I've been on drugs or you know, 03:14 she lists out all these things. And then she says; 03:18 now none of the above is true I just want to tell, 03:20 tell you that I made a D on my test. You know, 03:23 I just want you to keep things in perspective, so. 03:26 That's so truth. So, she frightened them to death, 03:28 before she brought them back down to reality. 03:30 Because it, it could be worse. 03:31 Yes, it could be worst. And of course, there is 03:33 that another corner saying, I was sitting 03:35 alone, feeling so discourage, suddenly 03:38 a voice came and said, cheer up things 03:40 could be worse. So, I cheered up and sure 03:42 enough things. Things got worse. 03:44 Things going worse. Yes. Things could have 03:46 been worse in the case of Betty and me you know, 03:49 we have this who the Lord has healed, I mean I, 03:53 I should say that the Lord has healed him, 03:55 but it was ten years of drug addiction 03:58 and alcoholism. And, and all the feelings that go 04:02 with that, feelings of guilt and shame and of anger. 04:07 Yes. And of questioning and God will, 04:09 God you know, why is this happening to us and 04:12 wondering how people are feeling about us? 04:15 And, and so the reason I'm telling this and by 04:19 the way, it's with the permission of our boy. 04:21 I'm, I'm not you know. Right. 04:22 Confessing his sins to everybody. 04:25 When I mentioned that I was going to write a book 04:27 and that I would, well I guess ask his permission 04:30 I said, would you mind if I did that? 04:32 he said dad all I put you 04:34 through and that's the least 04:35 I can do, you know. Because it's a story of 04:39 sadness, but it's a story of victory. 04:40 Yes. It's a story of victory. 04:42 And that's gives us hope. But, but five years ago, 04:46 if you'll ask me about it. I didn't have victory 04:49 and I think that this is what we would say to 04:51 the parents and grandparents who might 04:53 be watching this program that you 04:55 might be right in the middle of it. 04:58 And you might feel, oh! There is no hope for us. 05:01 But we never give up. But we, we must not, 05:03 we must not give up. So, how do we get involved? 05:06 Well, listen. Without getting involved. 05:08 Without getting involved, can I tell you 05:09 a little story before this? Right. 05:11 I was asked to speak once at an academy for 05:15 a chapel or something. You know, 05:17 speaking to teenagers. As frightened. Forget it, 05:20 and you know the teenagers in these days, 05:22 teenagers they make these funny sounds like 05:23 ooh ooh ooh ooh, and they wear their 05:25 hats backwards and. Are those teenagers? 05:29 Anyway I was gonna have to speak and 05:31 I didn't know what to talk about 'cause you know 05:33 they, they you know, a teenager can't tell 05:36 wheather we're live or on tape you know, 05:38 and they can't tell whether it's on television 05:39 or real life. Why are you frowning at me? 05:45 Well, no it's just that the reality 05:47 and fantasy blurs. Oh! You know, 05:49 people can actually. Well, I can understand that 05:51 when you're smaller, but this is teenager 05:52 we're talking about. Well you know, 05:53 well let me illustrate we believe in 3ABN television, 05:56 but there are many people who consider that 05:59 that the fantasy of television is real, 06:01 they'll come to the office after 06:02 watching a television program. Oh! Yes, I'm. 06:04 And to them it you know. You can't separate it. 06:06 For many people the, the football game is 06:10 more important than a marriage. Really they'll, 06:12 they'll be more concerned about who's 06:13 gonna win or lose the football game. 06:14 Right, right. Or whether they 06:16 were not stay married. Well, anyway I was 06:19 going to have to speak at. An academy. 06:21 In an academy and so, what am I gonna 06:22 speak about? So, I decided I've got 06:24 I'll do it, I'm gonna do with seminars you know, 06:27 that doesn't sound very exciting, but I decided 06:30 that I would tell them that I was gonna do 06:31 a seminar on how to lose money? It poked up. 06:34 Oh! Listen, so I stood up and I said, you know, 06:37 a lot of businessmen they, they spend a lot of 06:39 money and doing seminars and how to, 06:41 how to make money? I'm gonna do you a 06:43 free seminar and how to, how to lose money, 06:46 how to lose money? You know, you've got to 06:48 make it you know, seem very efficient. 06:50 And so, I said well, well the first way 06:53 to lose money is to neglect it and then I 06:56 told them how, where there's less inflation 06:59 I have, I have actually some Peruvian money 07:02 that used to be worth $37,000, seven years 07:05 later it was worth like pennies. 07:07 So, in other words if you just struck that $37,000 07:10 under your bed, pulled it out seven years 07:13 later pennies you see, 07:15 so when we lose money is neglected. 07:17 Another way to lose money is to abandon 07:18 it you know, put it on the table, 07:20 finders keepers losers weepers. 07:22 And of course another way lose money is to 07:23 waste it and I told him, how I'd been to weddings 07:26 overseas for they were throwing money 07:28 to all the visitors and everything. 07:30 And so, I said the seminar is over, 07:33 how do you like it? They smiled on me and I said, 07:36 now I'm gonna do another seminar and it's gonna 07:38 be a how to lose your girlfriend? 07:40 Oh! They really sat up straight. 07:41 Now, we're gonna really see. And I told them 07:44 it was really the same as losing money that 07:46 she would be, it would neglect her, 07:49 that you would abandoned her, or that 07:51 would be unfaithful to her and you know I, 07:54 told a little you know, five minute seminar. 07:56 I said that seminar is over, how'd you like it? 07:58 We loved it. I said, now the next seminar is 08:01 how to lose the Jesus as a friend? Of course, 08:04 it would be the same, the same kind of points 08:06 as losing your girlfriend. So, I finished and they, 08:09 they just, they just enjoy that they shook 08:11 my hand, I felt so good I felt like 08:13 I should be a youth leader. 08:15 I should go into youth ministry. 08:16 Yeah, you'd have been successful. 08:19 And so, believe it or not the revival week went on 08:22 and, and came Sabbath and they said, 08:24 Pastor O'Ffill would you like to go and talk 08:25 to the youth again? I felt, oh! I really not, 08:28 but anyway no, no it's just hard to 08:30 speak to youth sometimes, and so. 08:32 You don't have any trouble. Well, anyway 08:34 it's its anguish and so, I walked in the room 08:38 and I said, you remember me? And they said, 08:41 well we sure we remember you; you're the one 08:43 that talk to us in chapel on Monday. 08:45 And I said, you remember what I talked about? 08:49 And they said, you told us how to lose money? 08:51 And I said how was that? And they said, neglect it, 08:54 abandon it or waste it. Boy, I couldn't believe 08:57 my ears; I began to feel really good. 09:00 And then I said, what else can I talk about? 09:04 And they said, how to lose your girlfriend? 09:08 And I said, how did you do that? They said, 09:10 the same way as losing money. 09:12 I was really feeling, I seriously, 09:14 I felt, I felt so gratified. 09:17 I said, what else did I talk about? You know, 09:20 there was nothing they, they said nothing. 09:22 I said come on; I said that was the point. 09:25 Remember it was how to lose Jesus as a friend. 09:27 Right, right. They said, we don't remember. 09:31 So, what did you? Well, you know, 09:33 it made me realize that when I was talking about 09:35 money and about girlfriends I was 09:38 answering a question, a concerned that they had. 09:41 Something they were involved in. 09:43 But when I was talking about Jesus they, 09:44 they weren't involved in that. 09:46 And I thought you know life's like that. 09:48 They taught you a lesson. Well, basically, 09:52 basically we're hearing what our questions are? 09:55 And we're hearing what our concerns are? 09:57 And so, even in these programs. 09:59 We pick up on it. Whether you and I are doing 10:00 you see, you know, they could hear you and I talk 10:03 about children, but maybe the 10:04 person who has no children. They could say, 10:06 well I don't know what they're talking about. 10:07 Yeah, right. You see, now we're I don't, but, 10:09 but really if you're in the middle of it. 10:11 Then you're interested. Then you're interested 10:13 because, because you and I mentioned earlier, 10:16 I'm not looking for people who never been through 10:19 what I've been through. And now I wish 10:23 I had been through it, but I'm looking for people 10:25 who have been through it and who have made it, 10:27 who have made it. And so, and so we're not 10:30 looking for people who don't know 10:31 what it's like to be tempted. 10:32 A people who don't let, know what it's like 10:34 to be tested, how to be tried. People who, 10:37 who don't know what it's like to suffer, 10:38 but people who have, who have suffered 10:39 and have been tested. 10:41 Yes, who we gravitate toward. But who have, 10:44 but who have victorious. Yes, that's what we want. 10:46 We know how to lose? That's not easy just 10:49 do nothing you lose. We want to know 10:51 how to win. Yes. We're winning; I want to know 10:53 how to win? Well you know, this is an, 10:55 an issue that that comes up that you mentioned, 10:57 it's a title of our program, how to be 11:00 involved without getting involved? 11:03 Well, shall we take that on? Yeah, well. 11:06 But you know, I'm just thinking to myself 11:09 you know, is there an easy answer to that? 11:11 No. I don't think there's an easy answer. 11:13 In fact, it sounds like a contradiction of terms, 11:16 but I've got a couple of more stories, 11:18 you mind if I tell you these, no, these stories? 11:20 We enjoy your stories. 11:21 You know, isn't life about a story? 11:23 That that ultimately even a lesson is as good as 11:26 a story, if a picture is worth of thousand words 11:30 and a story is got to be worth. 11:31 Well, and that's how Jesus talked? 11:32 Well, a whole lot. Well, I'm almost ashamed 11:34 to tell you this story Kathy I don't know, 11:39 if you've discovered about us men you know, 11:41 you're married to Tom. Well, it depends on what? 11:44 And, and see we. What apart about men 11:46 you're talking about? We men, we men 11:48 if you haven't learned yet. We're very methodical, 11:51 we're problem solvers. Yes. Now, now you 11:54 women are spontaneous. Except when it comes to 11:56 asking directions and you just don't want to 11:58 do that, but anyway, anyway I've notice that 12:01 when it comes Christmas time, see that's 12:03 when I have, this is when you'll see the 12:04 difference between a man and a woman because 12:07 I don't have, well let me, let me show you. 12:10 At Christmas time I don't have a clue 12:11 as to what, what to buy my wife. 12:14 I want to ask my wife what she wants, 12:16 but if I have to ask her, I don't love her. 12:20 I'm supposed to guess, I'm supposed to guess. 12:23 And so, whatever it is, is supposed to be 12:24 a token of my love. Give me a break I can't, 12:27 I just can't, I can't imagine 12:29 what to buy my wife. Now, see what I wish 12:31 you would do? You see, honey you know, 12:34 what I want for Christmas. 12:35 It just makes it easy for you. I will feel so manly, 12:37 I would feel so husbandly, I'm suppose to guess. 12:41 Anyway on the flip side of that, 12:44 I wish she'd ask me what I want for Christmas. 12:47 No, she doesn't want to ask. So, she pays me 12:49 another shirt, another tie, I don't want 12:52 anymore shirts, I don't want anymore, 12:54 I want a tool, I want a tool. A hammer, 12:59 there is a nice side there cause Tom, 13:02 Tom's always going somewhere, I'm going 13:04 to look at hammers that's his standard answer, 13:07 doesn't matter if he's going to look at hammers 13:08 or not, but. But anyway you know, 13:10 that's the difference, in other words see 13:11 we men are very methodical see. 13:13 And so, the story I'm about to tell you was, 13:16 was I just said, I was gonna be romantic. 13:19 Now, you know in the sort of organized way, 13:22 it was gonna be a valentines day. 13:24 So, I decided I'm gonna do something really romantic. 13:29 All for the right reasons. Oh! Absolutely, 13:31 and so I thought I'm gonna take my wife 13:33 out to eat, original right. No. And so, 13:38 this is maybe a week in advance I walk up to and 13:40 I said, honey valentines coming next week. 13:43 And why don't we go out to eat? 13:45 I felt so spontaneous, so organized. 13:49 And she said lets don't. And you tried. 13:52 She said, let's just exchange cards. 13:56 And Kathy you know, that hit me like a ton 13:59 ton of bricks. Now, I don't know if all men 14:02 are like I'm but, but getting a nerve to ask 14:04 a girl out you know, when I was in 14:05 high school was really hard. 14:07 You don't like the rejection. 14:08 And to be turned down. Oh! This is just 14:10 you know, a rejection of one's person 14:13 I would say, I took it too seriously. 14:15 So, here I'm asking my wife out for 14:17 Valentines Day, sweetheart's day. 14:20 She's turning me down, I got a flashback. 14:25 Anyway, anyway, anyway, you know 14:26 I want to tell you what I really did I got 14:28 furious, I got furious. When I get really mad 14:32 I don't cuss or thrown like this. 14:34 You just get quiet. In my stomach. 14:36 That's called the silent night you know. 14:39 I begin to get this, this really and, 14:42 and I thought to myself, so you just want 14:44 us to exchange cards, do you? 14:46 I'll do you one better than that? 14:48 Do all men think like you. I thought I want to 14:52 teach you a lesson, so I'm not even gonna 14:54 give you a card and you're gonna wonder 14:56 why you didn't get a card. 14:58 And I'm gonna tell you it's because 15:00 I asked you out to eat and you wouldn't do it. 15:04 I was mad, I really was, I was so, 15:06 I was so insulted. So, anyway but I, 15:11 but I never showed it, I would smiling on, 15:13 she never knew what's going on. 15:15 And so, the day, couple of days past and this was a. 15:18 You have changed. So, anyway a couple of 15:22 days passed, but this is still in my head 15:24 and when I thinking about it 'cause I'm mad, 15:25 see I want to teach you a lesson. 15:27 And suddenly it occurred to me you know, 15:28 maybe if you're really gonna get even with her, 15:32 I think there's a better way. 15:34 She's gonna get you a card, why don't 15:36 you get her some flowers? Do one better, 15:39 really make her look bad. It's that awful? Yes. 15:42 Isn't that awful? I feel so ashamed and anyway 15:47 I liked that one better than do nothing. 15:49 And I held on to that plan and so the 15:52 Valentines Day came and where we worked, 15:56 our buildings were kind of in front of each other, 15:58 kind of across the street. 15:59 And so, she goes to work before I do 16:02 and so she went to work and then I went to 16:04 the supermarket and I brought a little thing 16:06 she could settle in these desk, you know, 16:07 on her desk a little flower there. 16:09 And, and I, I took it to her, her office, 16:12 but I didn't want to see her because I was mad, 16:15 I'm teaching her a lesson. 16:17 Can I believe what I'm saying? No. 16:19 No, isn't this crazy? You know, the scripture 16:21 tells us at the heart of you know, you know, 16:24 broken homes, broken homes have a reason. 16:26 Yes. And, and the reason I even tell this 16:28 story is because, because it's about what 16:30 we are unless we have the Jesus get in and, 16:32 and make us different. Yes. 16:34 And so, I walked into the lobby there to 16:37 the receptionist and I'm carrying these flowers 16:39 and I say to the receptionist and these 16:41 are for Betty and she smiled, she thought 16:44 that was so romantic and I said, 16:46 would you tell her they're here you know, 16:48 I don't want to face her. And the receptionist 16:52 said she is not here. She's across the street 16:54 at the conference office, where I work? 16:58 And I thought I didn't see her. 17:00 And so, I leave the flowers there and I 17:04 cross the street and I go back to my office and, 17:07 and I don't meet her in other words. 17:10 We don't come face to face, but let me 17:14 tell you I walk into my office there on my 17:19 desk is a package and a love note. 17:24 I wouldn't get one package and one love 17:27 note that day; I would get at least three or four. 17:32 And what was her motive? Well you know, 17:35 when I think of this. Well, I'm thinking, 17:37 but you know, we found guile, 17:38 what was her present? She didn't mean 17:40 anything and in fact, in fact I was telling 17:42 this story in Churches before I ever 17:45 talked to her about it. And when she heard 17:47 me tell at the first time because I felt so 17:49 ashamed for myself then she said, oh! 17:52 Honey, when I said let's just exchange cards 17:55 I didn't mean anything by that? 17:58 I just didn't want to bother you. 18:00 In other words that was kind of a sweet little 18:02 love jester, she were just being 18:04 loving and not demanding. And here me well I'm mad. 18:08 Well, you wanted to take her out to dinner or not 18:10 you're kind of known for not spending a lot of 18:12 money and she was trying to be nice to you. 18:14 Has Betty been talking to you. You. But Kathy, 18:19 the reason I tell the story is because when 18:21 you look at where we end up sometimes, 18:27 we didn't just fall there or drop into that. 18:29 It's a lot of little things. We went there 18:32 and when I saw that happen I thought 18:35 you know, a divorce is not an accident, 18:37 it's a series of bad moves. 18:41 And although she did one on me that day, 18:43 she got me four presents to 18:44 some crummy little flowers. Yes. 18:47 What would have been like if I had done nothing, 18:50 nothing, nothing. I'm so ashamed of myself. 18:54 But you know, when I look back on that, 18:56 I'm so thankful that she forgave me, 18:59 she never know anything was happening. 19:01 But Jesus didn't give up on me. 19:05 Now, but how do we get, how do get now, 19:08 how you're going to bring this into how to 19:10 get involved without getting involved? 19:12 Well, because you see I think there were all 19:14 acting and reacting on each other. 19:17 In other words, in other words you see 19:18 I really wasn't thinking about 19:20 Betty that Valentine's Day. 19:22 I was really thinking about me. 19:24 This really wasn't Betty's Sweetheart Day. 19:28 This was big selfish Dick O'Ffill. It was wrong, 19:34 it was wrongly driven you see and so, 19:36 and so you know, how can we pull ourselves apart? 19:41 So, that you know with our children, 19:42 of course our children now some of them are 19:45 making us proud, but others are disappointing us. 19:51 Because they're not meeting our expectations 19:52 and I'm sure they're not even 19:54 meeting God's expectations. 19:55 No. But, but, but how can I, how can I take the 20:00 focus off me and really care about them? 20:05 In other words, that Valentine's Day 20:06 was not about Betty, it was about me. 20:08 I see. I was gonna be hurt. 20:11 And so, if I was hurt I was gonna teach her a lesson. 20:15 And I, and I. And so, when parents when some times 20:17 children hurt parents? And we're hurt. Right. 20:21 Then we go back and teach them a lesson 20:22 in such a way. See we can do that see. Yeah. 20:25 And so, and so I think in my mind, I think 20:29 the challenge we have is, is to really, 20:32 is to really be thinking of our children. 20:36 In other words, instead of ourselves. 20:39 Supposing that my child leaves the 20:41 Church as my boy did. I'm thinking oh! 20:45 Man this makes me look bad. Oh! You know, 20:47 what is the conference gonna think of me. 20:48 You know, they're gonna think I'm a hypocrite, 20:50 they're gonna think I'm no good, I'm a failure. 20:53 Well, why wouldn't I've been thinking oh! 20:56 God, look at my boy, You died to save him. 20:59 Wouldn't be talking about my parenting skills? 21:01 Now, obviously I can say oh! Lord you know, I 21:05 maybe I wasn't what I ought to have been, 21:07 but at that time that's no time to go back 21:09 and mix that up again. And but to really 21:13 care about him. See, I really wasn't 21:15 caring about Betty that day. 21:18 I was caring about me. Right. I was gonna 21:20 teach her a lesson and make myself look good. 21:23 And so, as we relate to our, to our grown 21:28 children and of course they're gonna marry who 21:31 they wanna marry? Now, see this brings up 21:33 a subject and I don't know 'cause your girls 21:35 are gonna take that up one day. By the way, 21:38 I told, I told Sarah one time and I think 21:41 she already knew. I said, Sarah you know your 21:44 husband's out there some place. Yes. 21:45 You remember we did that. Yes, yeah and 21:46 she talked to me about. I said, Sarah your 21:49 husband's out there at some place. 21:51 You don't know what his name is, or where he lives? 21:53 But why not start praying for him now. Right. 21:56 It was a little teenage girl taught me that. 21:59 She said, one day I was driving along in my car 22:02 and I thought my husband's out there some place. 22:05 And we're not talking about boy crazy. No. 22:07 We're talking about reality. Right, right 22:09 nothing wrong and taking a long lines of 22:11 having a good home. 22:12 And so, and you have two girls. Right. 22:14 So, somewhere the Lord willing, there are two 22:17 boys that are gonna one day marry your 22:20 two girls and they're gonna your boys. 22:23 Are you praying for your two girls? 22:24 I think maybe you could expect. 22:26 For those two boys somewhere. Yeah. 22:28 Oh! Well, we do, we have. And to pray for 22:30 their families and because, because when 22:33 families are married and you know we unite, 22:35 we unite our, our. Can I tell you about a 22:38 little incident and doing that? Please do. 22:40 I don't know if there is enough time for that. 22:41 Sure. We were exercising here a while 22:44 back and it was a Friday afternoon and we wanted 22:46 to get ready for Sabbath. 22:48 We were gonna have our Sabbath alone, 22:49 it's just Sarah and I. And others had gone 22:53 off to a crusade meeting that Sarah, 22:55 see Tom and Rachel had gone off to do that, 22:57 so we were alone together. And we came 22:59 back down in a Country Road and there was a 23:02 a beaver pond and a rock out there. 23:04 And we were gonna have sun down worship, 23:05 Friday evening worship there on the rock together. 23:08 And that happened to be moon coming up that 23:11 night and we sat out there and talked for a 23:13 while until the sun went down. 23:15 And our prayer had that in it, somewhere out 23:18 here there's in this world, there is probably 23:21 a young man. Yes. Maybe praying under 23:23 this moonlight. And that brought tears to her 23:26 eyes and she said it's forever burned in my 23:28 mind looking at the moon, seeing the water 23:31 and or prayer there on the rock together and that 23:33 something that was, that's we have and 23:36 we do pray about that. Now, can I make the 23:39 plot thicken a little bit? Yes. You have this, 23:43 the privilege of praying for these future 23:46 sons-in-law sort of from a clean slate. 23:50 I've got former daughter-in-law, 23:54 I've got sons-in-law and, if you would ask me 23:58 to tell you the story of all that went on, 24:02 maybe my children were you know to blame 24:06 sometimes when you know, really to blame 24:08 other times maybe not to blame so much. 24:12 I've had in my own heart Kathy to fight 24:15 bitterness and resentment towards my former 24:18 daughter-in-law, let's just to 24:20 name something specific. Who I really think 24:23 and the poor thing really you know, at that time of 24:26 her life really crashed and burned. 24:28 And that's when we got left with the little girl 24:30 to raise for five years. And but I got to 24:35 thinking to myself, one day I thought you know, 24:36 I've got to pray for this woman. 24:39 Because if I'm gonna pray for her daughter 24:41 you see, you see even though our children 24:43 get divorced you know and I said her, oh! 24:46 It's not a former son-in-law. 24:48 I said son you and I are related forever, 24:50 you my not be the husband of my daughter, 24:53 but you're always be my boy 24:56 because of the children. Right. So, therefore 25:00 I can't forget him, for 20 years from now 25:04 I've got to continually pray for him. Right. 25:06 Because though, they're legally the marriage 25:08 was dissolved, the fat they have children 25:10 together binds us forever together. Right. 25:14 And I think this is meant a lot to me because 25:15 I think at times when I think of those divorces 25:19 and I felt bitterness and why did they do that 25:21 and, but then I thought, if I'm going to pray 25:23 for Andrea. Which is getting involved? 25:26 I think exactly right, I've got so I can't see 25:30 who you're gonna marry, or when you're gonna 25:31 come on marriage? But I've got to be there, 25:35 I've got to be there, I can't just say I'm not 25:36 gonna look anymore or you know, 25:38 forget you because we can't forget. 25:41 Now, we're bound together with cords 25:43 that will never be broken. 25:45 And it's done so much for me. 25:48 I've found myself lately praying, 25:50 if I told you this you know, it's will be an 25:52 x rated thing because I've been going through 25:53 something just horrible and if I told you 25:57 the story, you would say, oh! Dick that's, 25:59 that's awful, did you call the police? Yeah. 26:01 But I'm actually having the pray for my enemies, 26:03 my enemies these forces that have 26:06 destroyed our homes. Right. The homes of 26:09 our children. Right. But I know that as 26:12 I pray for my enemies that my own 26:14 heart is softened. Right, so without getting 26:18 involved in an angry manner. 26:19 So, that I could go on my life. Right. 26:20 So I could go on my life. So, I can't make 26:24 my children's decisions, but I've got to be 26:26 there, I got to pray that the Lord is giving 26:28 me the love and compaction and 26:31 the Spirit of forgiveness because that provides 26:33 stability, our children maybe going like this. 26:35 But we can't be. But we've got to someway, 26:37 we've got to begin the love without and 26:39 get it straight. Amen. And I believe Jesus 26:42 it is doing that I know He is doing for us. 26:44 Well, He's trying to get us ready for heaven. 26:46 Yes, yes. What you think? And we've got 26:48 to let Him do it. So, we're praying, 26:52 Lord keep Your mansions, we don't really mean that. 26:55 No not in the. But we do mean it when we say 26:58 Lord the most important thing for us, yeah, 27:01 is our children please Jesus, please save us. 27:04 Please save our children and that what's the, 27:05 the theme of all of this has been, yes it is, 27:08 Lord please save our children. 27:09 Keeps your mansions, save our children. 27:10 And I believe He is. There is a scripture 27:12 that comes to mind. And that's let us 27:15 not be weary in well doing: for in due season 27:18 we shall reap, if we faint not. Amen. 27:20 And I want to invite our viewers again 27:23 to join us next time and we'll be asking 27:26 Pastor O'Ffill to join as well. And I'd like to 27:29 ask you to pray for us, please pray for us 27:31 at home as well. Heavenly Father, 27:34 we're thankful that we got to be parents. 27:37 And Lord help us not to get tired 27:39 and not to get weary in well-doing. 27:42 But to pray and to continue to pray with 27:44 all our hearts and even praying for some 27:46 daughters-in-laws and sons-in-law who are, 27:49 who are no longer part of the family 27:51 that we might reach out with our hearts 27:53 and then our home in every way 27:55 might be healed, so that we can be 27:57 together, if not here at least when Jesus. |
Revised 2014-12-17