Welcome to Thinking
About Home and this is
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Kathy Matthews
and I'm thankful that
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you're back with us
again. Our last program
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we were dealing with
the pain and bitterness
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and rejection and
see how God's grace can
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really help us to get
through those kinds of
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experiences in our
lives. God is trying to help
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us get our minds off
of ourselves. And we're
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discovering that in
our experiences and our
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guest is Rick Kuntz, he
is Pastor and Evangelist,
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and we're thankful that
you're here with us again.
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You've got quite a
story. Well it's a great joy
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to be with you again
today and we're really
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thankful for the way
that God is teaching us,
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I think that's our
greatest privilege as Christians
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that God shows
more and more of how
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he looks at life. And
you know I was sharing before
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about some of the
struggles we went through.
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You can give us a
little review then. Yeah.
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as we got our boys we
found out very quickly
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within a matter of
hours that we're in for quite
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an experience and
that they weren't going
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to just change, because
they were in a stable home,
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and a lot of pain.
Right. And these were adopted
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boys. Let's just
clear that up, these were
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adopted boys from Guatemala,
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Guatemala that's
right. And you had a little
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girl in your home,
yeah. And her name is Hannah,
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right. At that
time she was how old?
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She was 2 and half,
when you brought the boys
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into the home and
they were how old?
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They were 10 and 6.
And you had a serious
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experience with
rage, didn't you? Yeah.
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They had been abused
and they had a lot of
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pain in their hearts
and so their bitterness
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was just poured out all over us.
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And it was like being
hit with a freight train,
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it was an amazing experience.
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And as I shared in the
last time when we spend
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together that I had
come to a time where
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I was willing to
surrender and let God work in me
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and accept this
divine providence
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he had brought to our
family. And after that.
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You said you just
really learned about love
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in this whole experience, right.
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What love really
demands? That's right.
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And how love really
works and it was just
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going through, it was
painful but even going
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through it we had
times of incredible insight
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and even some
feelings of positiveness and
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blessing from the
Lord. We saw little evidences
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of God touching our,
you know one of our boys
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or touching our
daughter or encouraging my wife,
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this gave you
hope. Gave us hope.
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You know as we
continued to look through the
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promises of God. But
it wasn't, it wasn't,
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it didn't happened overnight.
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And after about
three years our son Carlos,
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he was 13 by then
decided, he just wasn't willing,
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he just told, he
told us later that he had
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totally hated us. He
blamed us for all the,
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when he came?
Yeah, and it just built.
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And so by the time
he was 13 he was doing
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everything and he
could to turn our daughter
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and his brother against
us. And so the Holy Spirit
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helped me to realize
that you know I couldn't
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allow him to stay in the home.
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Be at the same
time. So he must have been
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experiencing, but
you were home-schooling
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before right, yeah, do
you wanna talk about that?
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Yeah, we were
home-schooling the boys
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and then we took
Carlos to a Christian school
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for a year and it
was a little helpful but
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in the home he had
one goal and that was
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to destroy our
family. How could he blame you
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when he had been 10
years in an environment
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that was
devastating in Guatemala?
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We were the only
ones close enough and
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showed enough love
to be able to blame,
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to be able to blame
I see. And that's what,
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it's hard for us to
figure out as human beings
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and as parents why
sometimes do our kids
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if they're in trouble or
difficulties or heartache,
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why don't they take it
out on us? It's because
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we are the only safe
people in their life.
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And you know we got to be
willing to just allow them.
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To hurt the one you
love most, or hurt the one
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that's closest to you
or loving you the most,
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yeah. Isn't that
what we do to Christ?
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That's right. And
that's, this transition that
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God's trying to put in
our minds of how we work
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with people
everybody we work with.
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Is that, we're an
extension of God's love and that
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God is still the
healer. And he can heal that
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when someone
rejects us today and someone
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just tears us apart
verbally or emotionally
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whatever is today we
can go to the healer,
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Jesus and he can heal
that in our hearts and
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continue to create his
love in us you know day by day.
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So I struggle with
that. And not before tomorrow
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but just today. That's right.
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Yeah, we wait till
tomorrow it will be dead
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by the time
tomorrow comes spiritually.
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Okay now I've interrupted
you about, that's okay.
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So I came to a point
that I knew that I had
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to take Carlos out of the home.
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And I went through a
lot of guilt about that.
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I felt like a failure
and my wife struggled feeling
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like a failure. And I
knew. This was not a one day
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experience of
feeling failing. No. No, some
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healing took place there
absolutely. That's right.
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And so I came
through a point where we look
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for a Christian school
for troubled teenagers.
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And Carlos went a
little school called Miracle
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Meadows down in West Virginia.
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I've heard about that,
yes I've heard of that.
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Wonderful school Bill
and Gayle Clark run it.
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And Carlos was
there about a year,
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he burned down the
barn while he was there,
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he barely escaped
with his own life,
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he should have been
dead, one of the kids
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found him unconscious
in there with the smoke
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inhalation, but he
didn't change and they basically
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said well there's not
a whole lot we can do to
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help him. And he wanted
to go and see his father.
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He got it in his mind,
if he go back to Guatemala
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and find his birth
father that his birth father
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would really be
able to help him.
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So we helped him you
know, I mean so many miracles
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and God, you know in
this process God found a
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place, a Christian family
to stay with in Guatemala.
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And when he got there
within two three days,
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he wanted to come
home. And we have told him
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if you go you got
to stay for six months,
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because we knew he
wanna come home right
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away and when he
got down there he met
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his uncle. You know from his,
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his biological family
and his uncle told him
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you better not go
see your father because
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he'll force you
to stay down here and
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he's in a bad way.
Why? Why would he force to?
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He is now; I mean
that's the way they lived
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down there. Use
him. Oh yeah. I see.
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And so Carlos decided
not to see his birth father
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but he stay down
there for six months and
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he came home. and
he hasn't changed.
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And so we put him in
another Christian school
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for troubled
teenagers and he got kicked out
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of that school. We put
him in another Christian
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school for troubled
teenagers and he got
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kicked out of that school.
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So finally by this
time he was 16 years of age.
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Yeah. and we're
still dealing with Rocky,
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he's you know he is.
Now Rocky was the other
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one you adopted. Yeah,
and he's still going through
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all kinds of you know
problems and all kinds
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of stuff with his
illness and also with the
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bitterness. His
illness was autism? Yeah.
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They call it Aspergers
today, it was like a high
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functioning autism.
So, you know here we are,
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you know so many
times in this process
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we had to just constantly,
it was like constantly
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going to God and
pouring out our heart and
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saying God just create
in us love and patience
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and
understanding, you just help us.
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You know help
us, we're helpless.
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God just kept
doing that, you know,
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day by day, moment by moment.
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You know he kept
doing that for us.
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And so I had a talk
with my wife and I had
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a talk with Carlos
and I say Carlos we want
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you know that we love
you. And this is where
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we're talking
about understanding love.
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Love has the side of
mercy, but it also has the
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side of justice.
Yes. And so I say Carlos,
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we love you, we
want to help you and says
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we're not trying to
take the place of your
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parents, we can't,
you know we're just trying
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to help you. But I
said Carlos if you're not
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willing to try and
deal with this issues then
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I'm gonna send you
I'm gonna take you right
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back down to
Guatemala and I'm gonna leave
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you there. And
you know he heard me.
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And this is by the
time he was 16 but he had
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already experienced
being in Guatemala now
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for six months, is that
correct? Yeah but not as,
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not on his own he
knew he would come back
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to you. That's right.
But now he had been there
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and experiencing what
it was like to be there.
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This was stark
reality; oh he knew what it
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was like there. I see.
He knew what it was like.
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And so he went
to, we tried one more
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school and these were
some, this last one was
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Teen Challenge, you
know a wonderful school
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for troubled
teenagers. Yes. Well he was here
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about a month or so,
and he got in a fight
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with somebody and
ran away and called us
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on the phone and I
said Carlos if you show up
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at home I said, I am
gonna take you right down
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the Guatemala. He
said what I'm gonna do?
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I says go back and deal with it.
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Confront the situation.
You got to quit running
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away from yourself.
See 'cause that's what
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all of us tend to do
as human beings we want
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to blame somebody
else, blame our parents
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you know blame the society,
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blame the
church, blame everybody.
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No accountability.
Not be responsible.
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That's right. Instead
of dealing with the issue
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in our own heart, so
he said how am I gonna
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get back. I said
you know go and wash
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some dishes you
know get some bus fare,
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'cause I grew up
hard, yes. And you know love
00:09:35.31\00:09:38.27
has to be tough sometimes. Yes.
00:09:38.28\00:09:39.77
So he went back,
he washed some dishes,
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got some money, got
back and within a month
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or two he had given his
heart to the Lord. Amen.
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And he was born again.
A genuine change came in
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his life. Is that
right. And he began to
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communicate with us
after that and he began
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to thank us for
showing him love.
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That is truly born
again, isn't it? That's right.
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For all that we had
done, you know we were away,
00:10:00.95\00:10:03.52
you know he
continued to go to school,
00:10:04.77\00:10:06.24
he went to School
in Texas while at Teen
00:10:06.25\00:10:08.01
Challenge and then he
worked at Teen Challenge
00:10:08.02\00:10:09.83
for a couple of years. Did he?
00:10:09.84\00:10:11.05
And began to make
a little progress,
00:10:11.82\00:10:13.23
little progress,
little progress but he would
00:10:13.24\00:10:15.73
write us when we
were away in Romania
00:10:15.74\00:10:19.09
for a year, doing evangelism,
00:10:19.10\00:10:20.92
but he'd write us
letter and we write him
00:10:20.93\00:10:22.70
a letter and then
when we're in the country
00:10:22.71\00:10:24.64
we talk on the phone
about once every week.
00:10:24.65\00:10:27.05
And you know it was
so precious just about
00:10:28.12\00:10:32.12
a month ago I
said and he says daddy,
00:10:32.13\00:10:33.76
says I'm starting
to learn that you know
00:10:33.77\00:10:37.71
it's my strong
independent attitude
00:10:37.72\00:10:40.56
that is my biggest
enemy. He is 21 years of age.
00:10:41.38\00:10:44.53
Oh is that right?
And what a revelation,
00:10:44.54\00:10:49.18
most people who go
to a church 30, 40 years
00:10:49.58\00:10:52.42
have not
discovered that. That's right.
00:10:52.43\00:10:54.33
And you know to a
human point of view
00:10:54.64\00:10:56.99
you know he doesn't
attend church regularly,
00:10:57.00\00:10:59.94
but he's real with
God. He is trying to learn
00:11:00.64\00:11:04.02
how to understand,
how to walk with God
00:11:04.03\00:11:06.49
and how to live by
faith and understand God's
00:11:06.50\00:11:09.00
character and he's 21
now, he just got married
00:11:09.01\00:11:11.97
about a year ago,
a sweet young lady.
00:11:11.98\00:11:14.16
Is that right? And
she is really precious and
00:11:14.17\00:11:16.17
they have a little girl Jasmine,
00:11:16.18\00:11:18.35
who was just born
a little while ago,
00:11:18.98\00:11:20.86
probably about two months,
00:11:20.87\00:11:22.39
she must be about
two months old now and
00:11:22.40\00:11:24.61
now he is beginning
to understand more and
00:11:24.62\00:11:26.79
more about what God gave them,
00:11:26.80\00:11:29.65
him and his brother through us.
00:11:29.66\00:11:32.14
And through this
experience it's helped me
00:11:33.19\00:11:35.81
to see the pain that I
brought to my own parents
00:11:35.82\00:11:38.37
and the lack of
appreciation that I
00:11:38.38\00:11:40.29
showed to my own
mother especially.
00:11:40.30\00:11:41.63
'cause she went
through hell with my father
00:11:42.38\00:11:43.70
and my father was
just an animal. Really.
00:11:43.71\00:11:46.56
You know many
times when I was going
00:11:46.57\00:11:47.92
to sleep the only
thing I can hear was
00:11:47.93\00:11:50.78
my father cursing and
swearing at my mother.
00:11:50.79\00:11:52.75
I didn't show
appreciation of love to my
00:11:52.76\00:11:55.88
mother and it's
like, it's been such a rich
00:11:55.89\00:11:58.92
experience even
through all the pain
00:11:58.93\00:12:00.92
I wouldn't trade our
boys, our family for all
00:12:00.93\00:12:03.53
the money in the
world, it's been wonderful.
00:12:03.54\00:12:06.15
Now I share a little
bit about, you know Rocky
00:12:06.16\00:12:08.19
and his
experience. Yes, please do.
00:12:08.20\00:12:09.97
We home-schooled
Rocky for probably three or
00:12:11.45\00:12:14.40
four years and then
we began to see that,
00:12:14.41\00:12:17.40
you know he wasn't
responding you know
00:12:17.83\00:12:20.56
normally and so we
had some testing done
00:12:21.14\00:12:23.92
and began to see
that you know he was,
00:12:23.93\00:12:25.93
had some special
needs and so we tried him
00:12:25.94\00:12:28.50
in special aid, you
know public school system.
00:12:28.51\00:12:31.79
And that wasn't
really that helpful,
00:12:32.73\00:12:36.90
you know they
just don't have enough
00:12:36.91\00:12:38.57
you know teacher
and student ratio to try
00:12:39.85\00:12:42.63
and to work with
him. I say not enough
00:12:42.64\00:12:43.63
individual time. You
know so that was really
00:12:43.64\00:12:45.80
hard and it wasn't
you know the special aid
00:12:45.81\00:12:48.60
class wasn't tailored
to where you know Rocky
00:12:48.61\00:12:52.11
really is, you know
it was just difficult so
00:12:52.12\00:12:55.22
we would, we took
him back and we continued
00:12:55.23\00:12:57.67
to home-school. Did
you, and you know with
00:12:57.68\00:12:59.74
Rocky it was like
little by little we began to
00:12:59.75\00:13:04.36
have insights all
along the way because
00:13:04.37\00:13:06.40
Rocky bonded with us.
Carlos never did those
00:13:06.41\00:13:09.54
first years, but Rocky
bonded with us emotionally
00:13:09.55\00:13:13.55
and even though he
still was full of anger and
00:13:14.49\00:13:16.61
still did a lot of
destructive and you know
00:13:16.62\00:13:18.79
bad things. It was
little by little God began
00:13:19.54\00:13:23.28
to heal. And
it's so complicated,
00:13:23.29\00:13:28.37
you know sometimes
we're in situations in our
00:13:28.38\00:13:30.22
families that there
are no, there's no answer.
00:13:30.23\00:13:33.59
Yes. You just have
to make a judgment call
00:13:33.88\00:13:36.37
of some kind.
Yeah, that's right.
00:13:36.38\00:13:37.39
You can talk to
counselors till you're blue
00:13:38.03\00:13:39.34
in the face,
there is no answers.
00:13:39.35\00:13:40.51
But the answer is
letting God work in us,
00:13:41.43\00:13:44.05
letting God work
through us and just depending
00:13:44.60\00:13:46.43
fully upon what God
can do in someone's life.
00:13:46.44\00:13:48.96
And so Rocky would
have one insight after
00:13:49.73\00:13:52.06
another, some it's
like a light will come on
00:13:52.07\00:13:53.72
in his mind, you know
about how to relate in
00:13:53.73\00:13:55.72
a situation but we still
kept having problems like
00:13:56.77\00:13:58.94
he stole, he still
steals on a continual bases.
00:13:59.49\00:14:03.16
And we began to
realize it he is, it's
00:14:04.06\00:14:06.09
almost like he
doesn't have a conscience.
00:14:07.19\00:14:08.74
You know it's like
the part of the Aspergers
00:14:09.40\00:14:11.76
thing and you know we
begin to alter the way
00:14:11.77\00:14:16.57
that we work with
him. It makes me wonder
00:14:16.58\00:14:18.42
though, how many
children are out there
00:14:18.43\00:14:20.64
that's like that,
that hadn't been diagnosed
00:14:20.65\00:14:22.26
and it's certainly
not working with parents,
00:14:22.27\00:14:24.32
who have found this about them.
00:14:25.10\00:14:26.72
There's probably
thousands of them.
00:14:27.32\00:14:28.37
See if, in our
Christian experience we're so
00:14:28.38\00:14:32.11
blind to where people are at.
00:14:32.12\00:14:34.92
It's so easy for
us and that was me,
00:14:36.83\00:14:39.10
you know that was
me just kind of looking
00:14:39.72\00:14:44.18
at someone and just
kind of having an idea
00:14:44.19\00:14:46.75
of well this is what
they should be like or they
00:14:46.76\00:14:49.35
should be able to
understand this and
00:14:49.36\00:14:51.52
through our
experience we've been able to
00:14:51.53\00:14:53.88
realize more and more
that people are not able
00:14:53.89\00:14:58.61
to understand but
little by little by little.
00:14:58.62\00:15:02.69
Little increments.
That's right. You know I've just
00:15:02.70\00:15:04.66
got to interrupt
you here. Yeah go.
00:15:04.67\00:15:06.25
We've had a
little experience with
00:15:06.26\00:15:07.61
our daughter.
There was a couple that
00:15:07.62\00:15:08.60
we've worked with
and they've come out of
00:15:08.61\00:15:10.83
ten years and
more, never confronting
00:15:10.84\00:15:14.84
a problem that
they had to deal with.
00:15:14.85\00:15:16.57
They would run to
drugs, or they would run away
00:15:16.58\00:15:18.70
and now they're
married to each other,
00:15:19.62\00:15:20.98
you know of course
one was on one setting
00:15:20.99\00:15:22.63
one another we met
them when they got married
00:15:22.64\00:15:24.47
we have rented an
apartment to them.
00:15:24.48\00:15:26.00
And our daughter has
been dealing with this
00:15:26.80\00:15:28.92
very thing because
they're in our home
00:15:28.93\00:15:30.50
a lot and we worked
with them for two years
00:15:30.51\00:15:33.11
now they have a
little six month old baby
00:15:33.45\00:15:35.48
and he's like a
little grandson to us and
00:15:35.49\00:15:37.79
but just our
daughter experiencing how to
00:15:38.59\00:15:43.21
deal and give them
time. Not to make an excuse
00:15:43.22\00:15:47.24
for them to use
her and saying well you
00:15:47.25\00:15:49.44
just got to give me
time because they're
00:15:49.45\00:15:51.01
adults now. But
realizing that this can be
00:15:51.02\00:15:54.98
a major problem, we
don't know what all their
00:15:54.99\00:15:58.26
mind is able to comprehend.
00:15:58.27\00:16:00.63
And yet they shall
magnificent understanding
00:16:01.53\00:16:03.86
at times, yeah. so anyway I,
00:16:03.87\00:16:06.30
you know I just
rolled that through my mind
00:16:06.94\00:16:08.84
when you're talking
about yours as our own
00:16:08.85\00:16:10.90
daughter has had
experience dealing with
00:16:10.91\00:16:12.86
others and being long suffering.
00:16:12.87\00:16:15.08
And to me that's one
of the greatest gifts
00:16:15.62\00:16:18.48
that God can give to
us is to learn to have
00:16:19.02\00:16:23.44
forbearance, it's
only through God's grace,
00:16:23.45\00:16:25.45
God working in us but
to learn to give people
00:16:25.46\00:16:28.63
time to learn and even when
00:16:29.41\00:16:30.77
they're rebellious
sure, there may need to be
00:16:30.78\00:16:33.49
some discipline.
There may need to be some
00:16:33.50\00:16:36.25
separation there, but
not to write people off.
00:16:36.26\00:16:38.93
And not to say well
you know to the kind of,
00:16:39.72\00:16:42.22
look at them as
hopeless or there's nothing
00:16:42.23\00:16:44.45
God can do for
them because I've seen
00:16:45.00\00:16:46.55
with my own eyes.
God changed so many
00:16:46.56\00:16:49.54
people starting
with myself my heart
00:16:49.55\00:16:51.40
was so hard when
I was a teenager,
00:16:51.41\00:16:52.95
I was just hard
against God. Be it God find
00:16:53.69\00:16:56.65
a way to win my
heart. God found the way
00:16:56.66\00:16:58.71
to soften my heart.
It comes in the business
00:16:58.72\00:17:00.33
of saving us and we
will be saved. Amen,
00:17:00.34\00:17:02.34
that's right. And he works ugly,
00:17:02.35\00:17:03.78
he works over years to
set us up for surrender
00:17:03.79\00:17:08.46
of our hearts.
Of course he does,
00:17:08.47\00:17:09.44
the Holy Spirit is
working and I think of something
00:17:09.45\00:17:11.14
out of the favorite
book called Steps to Christ.
00:17:11.15\00:17:12.94
And I told this to
my girls many times,
00:17:13.78\00:17:15.39
maybe you told it to
your boys, I don't know,
00:17:15.94\00:17:17.38
if you will not
resist, amen, if you will not
00:17:18.05\00:17:20.74
resist you will be in
heaven, you will be drawn,
00:17:20.75\00:17:23.77
amen, if you won't resist, amen.
00:17:23.78\00:17:26.12
And that's such a
beautiful picture of what
00:17:27.43\00:17:29.31
God is really like, he
wants us in heaven more
00:17:29.32\00:17:31.62
than we want to be
there. Yes. We don't have
00:17:31.63\00:17:33.13
to worry about
him keeping us out,
00:17:33.14\00:17:34.76
it's whether we are
willing to be able to be
00:17:35.49\00:17:38.10
happy there, you
know through his grace.
00:17:38.11\00:17:39.75
So you know, back doors
where I'm talking about,
00:17:40.42\00:17:42.64
its okay. And we're
working you know with Rocky
00:17:42.65\00:17:46.00
and little by little
the lights come on and then
00:17:46.54\00:17:49.89
we had to go to
Romania and he stayed with
00:17:49.90\00:17:53.19
my mom and my mom
has such a positive
00:17:53.20\00:17:55.44
influence on him. You
know she just loved him
00:17:55.45\00:17:59.70
and nurtured
him and she, my mom,
00:18:00.11\00:18:03.44
I'll tell you what a
gem, you know she's really
00:18:04.00\00:18:06.93
crippled up with
arthritis, she can hardly,
00:18:06.94\00:18:08.79
she has little more of
this now but at that time
00:18:09.43\00:18:10.88
she can hardly even
walk and yet she would
00:18:10.89\00:18:13.45
help him, she get
up in the morning and
00:18:13.46\00:18:15.04
help get ready him,
get him ready for school
00:18:15.05\00:18:16.74
and she just loved
him, you know all that time
00:18:16.75\00:18:20.63
and then he came
back home and it's so,
00:18:20.64\00:18:23.99
it's been a process.
but the light comes on
00:18:25.19\00:18:27.90
more and more he
still has his liability,
00:18:28.45\00:18:30.98
revelations, oh I'm
sorry I was thinking
00:18:30.99\00:18:32.84
the other way
around but he is having his
00:18:32.85\00:18:34.12
revelations. Oh yeah,
God he still teaching in.
00:18:34.13\00:18:35.78
but he still has his
problems. And you know he
00:18:35.79\00:18:37.73
still has Aspergers,
and his mind still functions
00:18:37.74\00:18:40.26
in that way. Yes. But
it's like God is healing
00:18:40.27\00:18:43.50
him more and more
spiritually. Just when
00:18:43.51\00:18:45.21
he was home recently
he comes home on vacations
00:18:45.22\00:18:46.87
'cause now he is in a
special school for children
00:18:46.88\00:18:50.56
just like himself and
it's almost like, it's
00:18:50.57\00:18:52.12
not a Christian
school but it's like a home
00:18:52.13\00:18:55.57
and they have four students.
00:18:55.58\00:18:57.16
So is he not in
your home all the time?
00:18:57.70\00:19:00.17
No. In February of
this year he went to this
00:19:00.18\00:19:02.77
special school
and how old is he now.
00:19:02.78\00:19:04.31
He is 17. Is he?
And when he comes home
00:19:04.32\00:19:07.50
of the school vacations,
does he. And he was so,
00:19:07.51\00:19:10.03
it was so awesome,
recently we had a little
00:19:10.04\00:19:13.27
crisis I think
there was some thunder
00:19:14.13\00:19:15.63
lightening and our
dog took off or something.
00:19:15.64\00:19:17.36
And first thing out
of Rocky's mouth he says,
00:19:17.90\00:19:20.71
he says I want to pray
to Jesus, so that Jesus
00:19:20.72\00:19:22.91
can help bring our
dog home and he would just
00:19:22.92\00:19:27.93
be bow his head and
he just talk to Jesus
00:19:27.94\00:19:30.77
the best way he
knows Jesus. Amen.
00:19:30.78\00:19:32.53
And then when the
dog came back he say
00:19:32.54\00:19:36.13
you know look at,
you know Jesus brought
00:19:36.14\00:19:37.69
our dog back. And
to look at that boy,
00:19:37.70\00:19:40.35
11 years ago there
is no way in the world
00:19:41.40\00:19:46.73
that he could ever, ever
get any better only worse.
00:19:46.74\00:19:49.93
But it's not me, it's
not my wife, it's through
00:19:50.80\00:19:54.30
the grace of Lord
Jesus Christ. Amen.
00:19:54.31\00:19:56.67
The divine healing
love of Jesus Christ that
00:19:56.68\00:19:59.14
he's doing that work,
and I believe with all
00:19:59.15\00:20:00.95
my heart that Rocky
is going to be in heaven.
00:20:00.96\00:20:02.97
Amen. Because he is
so, I mean it's just
00:20:02.98\00:20:06.54
beautiful to see the
Holy Spirit working him
00:20:06.55\00:20:08.48
in his fear, in his fear, yes.
00:20:08.49\00:20:12.31
And see that's
what God's trying,
00:20:12.32\00:20:13.77
one of the things
God is trying to help us
00:20:13.78\00:20:15.06
learn as we work
with each other everybody
00:20:15.07\00:20:17.32
is at a different
level, of different fear,
00:20:17.33\00:20:19.15
different
understanding, we gotta quit
00:20:19.16\00:20:20.87
pigeonholing people
and writing people off
00:20:20.88\00:20:23.35
and you know trying
to, you know put him
00:20:23.36\00:20:26.61
in the way we see it,
but see people through
00:20:26.62\00:20:29.99
God's eyes. Now,
is Rocky at an mental,
00:20:30.00\00:20:34.77
average mental level
of a 17 year old. No, no.
00:20:34.78\00:20:38.15
it sounded from the
prayer that he might not be.
00:20:38.72\00:20:40.42
No, no he's probably
like a 3 or 4 year old.
00:20:40.43\00:20:42.38
Is that right? I
wonder what he was then
00:20:42.39\00:20:45.84
when you got him. Not very much.
00:20:45.85\00:20:50.18
Not very much,
he was 6 years old,
00:20:50.92\00:20:51.93
he couldn't dress
himself, he couldn't hold
00:20:51.94\00:20:54.13
a pencil in his hand.
Just it was like he was
00:20:54.14\00:20:57.36
just vicious like
animal, like a vicious animal.
00:20:57.37\00:21:00.48
And I mean he loves to work now,
00:21:01.30\00:21:03.93
we taught him, we
taught our children
00:21:03.94\00:21:05.37
responsibility.
He loves to work.
00:21:05.86\00:21:07.95
And he's a good
worker. He will go out and
00:21:08.78\00:21:11.72
he will you know he
takes a long time because
00:21:11.73\00:21:13.46
he's got to it in
his autistic way. Yes.
00:21:13.47\00:21:15.43
When he stacks
firewood, very methodically.
00:21:15.44\00:21:17.88
Yeah and he has to
have this piece here and
00:21:17.89\00:21:20.02
that piece there and so. Really.
00:21:20.03\00:21:21.04
And it takes him
longer, like a puzzle.
00:21:21.05\00:21:22.21
That's right like
a puzzle, you got it.
00:21:22.22\00:21:23.69
Like a puzzle. And he
has to do it his way but
00:21:24.28\00:21:27.81
he loves to work.
You know he loves to do
00:21:27.82\00:21:30.22
things I mean that's
just so incredible what God
00:21:30.23\00:21:32.55
has done in his life.
And so it's that process
00:21:32.56\00:21:36.09
and I believe that if
my wife and I hadn't of,
00:21:36.10\00:21:43.72
believed in what God
could do, and hadn't been
00:21:45.33\00:21:47.64
willing, didn't hang
in there, hang in there,
00:21:47.65\00:21:49.32
yeah, I still believe
that God would help our boys.
00:21:49.33\00:21:51.61
But we would not
have had the blessing of
00:21:52.66\00:21:55.04
God in our own
lives. You see in our,
00:21:55.05\00:21:57.76
and it wasn't easy.
It wasn't through ease
00:21:57.77\00:22:00.28
and avoiding,
wasn't through any kind
00:22:00.29\00:22:03.75
of escaping like
that. No, it was,
00:22:03.76\00:22:05.60
I mean it was just I can't
describe in words the pain,
00:22:07.97\00:22:10.91
putting one foot
in front of the other.
00:22:10.92\00:22:12.04
It was one day,
sometimes many times one
00:22:12.05\00:22:14.77
moment at a time, one
minute at a time crying
00:22:14.78\00:22:17.55
out to the Lord,
do the next thing.
00:22:17.56\00:22:19.10
That's right. But it
was our blessing to have
00:22:19.39\00:22:24.99
these boys. You
know. Is it easier to see
00:22:25.68\00:22:27.85
that as a blessing
now or did you see,
00:22:27.86\00:22:29.72
did you really feel
it as a blessing in the
00:22:30.49\00:22:32.72
earlier years. I felt
that it was harder for my wife
00:22:33.61\00:22:37.14
I think. She's
probably more sensitive,
00:22:37.15\00:22:42.59
as a person
everybody has different
00:22:43.62\00:22:44.89
personality temperaments. Yes.
00:22:44.90\00:22:46.65
But after those first
two weeks in my experience
00:22:47.02\00:22:50.46
I saw it clearly it didn't
feel good a lot of the time,
00:22:51.03\00:22:54.64
but I saw it was
clear, I had a clear vision
00:22:54.65\00:22:56.84
in my heart, God had
given us this gift of having
00:22:56.85\00:23:00.04
these boys to
change our characters.
00:23:00.05\00:23:02.13
The gift of
suffering. That's right, amen.
00:23:02.72\00:23:04.82
And in Philippians
3:10 one of the things
00:23:05.35\00:23:08.26
Paul says that, he
says, That I may know him
00:23:08.27\00:23:10.54
and the Power of
His Resurrection and the
00:23:10.55\00:23:12.28
fellowship of his
sufferings. Amen. Oh.
00:23:12.29\00:23:14.96
And it's through going
experiencing the rejection
00:23:14.97\00:23:18.97
and pain in own
lives that we have a little
00:23:18.98\00:23:21.06
window into the
suffering of God.
00:23:21.07\00:23:23.11
Just a little window
and the more suffering
00:23:23.12\00:23:25.62
we're willing to
experience the more we can
00:23:25.63\00:23:28.70
sympathize with
our God and the more we
00:23:28.71\00:23:30.78
see what love really is. Amen.
00:23:30.79\00:23:32.26
And it's a fearful
prayer, don't pray that. Scary.
00:23:32.84\00:23:36.00
You know Dietrich
Bonhoeffer I think prayed
00:23:36.35\00:23:39.27
about the cost of
discipleship, amen.
00:23:39.28\00:23:41.76
And his book I don't
know if you read it I
00:23:42.32\00:23:43.78
wanna get it, I haven't read it,
00:23:43.79\00:23:44.93
I've seen it and I
would like to read it,
00:23:44.94\00:23:46.43
listen I want to
invite our viewers you have
00:23:47.27\00:23:49.46
a little story about
your daughter Hannah,
00:23:49.47\00:23:51.31
but I wanna invite
our audience to write or
00:23:51.48\00:23:54.87
call 3ABN and if
there's any future topic
00:23:54.88\00:23:59.50
that we can handle on
Thinking about Home, if
00:24:00.13\00:24:02.11
it's possible for us
to that then we'll try to,
00:24:02.12\00:24:05.31
we'll consider what
you have to suggest.
00:24:05.96\00:24:07.97
The address is
3ABN, P.O. Box 220,
00:24:08.73\00:24:12.33
West Frankfort,
Illinois 62896 and I wanna
00:24:12.34\00:24:15.98
give you the 800
number, it's 1-800-752-3226
00:24:15.99\00:24:20.69
and I just want to
encourage you to write
00:24:21.53\00:24:23.32
or call and back to you now.
00:24:23.33\00:24:24.88
Hannah is your
daughter, we've only got
00:24:26.06\00:24:27.40
a few minutes we
wanna share a scripture
00:24:27.41\00:24:29.19
and then we'll go
out with prayer but,
00:24:29.20\00:24:31.09
what about Hannah?
This has been a hard,
00:24:31.10\00:24:33.79
hard experience for
Hannah because she has had
00:24:33.80\00:24:36.84
to live with a lot
of pain and rejection.
00:24:36.85\00:24:39.22
And yet you know God
is, have been working
00:24:40.44\00:24:43.29
with her
through this experience.
00:24:43.30\00:24:44.94
You know she's struggled,
as she is getting older,
00:24:45.55\00:24:49.09
it's been especially
hard with Rocky because
00:24:49.10\00:24:52.31
he doesn't think like
we think. Hannah would
00:24:52.32\00:24:54.73
try to just do
things with him and he would
00:24:54.74\00:24:57.82
just react in way
that is totally unnatural.
00:24:57.83\00:25:01.49
You know just
because he's on different
00:25:02.28\00:25:05.29
wavelength you know
and you know she got
00:25:05.30\00:25:07.96
to a point where
she just said you know
00:25:07.97\00:25:10.14
I don't want to
be round him anymore
00:25:10.15\00:25:11.85
and you know I felt
like that so many times,
00:25:12.59\00:25:15.17
yes. It doesn't mean
that. Were there many
00:25:15.18\00:25:17.27
nights sitting down
and talking and crying,
00:25:17.28\00:25:19.41
yeah you better
believe it. Maybe days do.
00:25:20.03\00:25:21.75
You better believe
it. And yet even though
00:25:21.76\00:25:25.18
she said that at times
her heart wouldn't let go,
00:25:25.19\00:25:28.47
really. She didn't really want.
00:25:28.48\00:25:29.90
No, 'cause she's
continuing, she works,
00:25:29.91\00:25:33.93
I mean you know
doing small jobs,
00:25:34.54\00:25:36.04
she cleans my
mother's little apartment
00:25:36.05\00:25:38.06
and then she has a
small allowance and
00:25:38.07\00:25:41.30
she spends lot of
her money on gifts and
00:25:42.06\00:25:44.64
she will buy,
that's her love language,
00:25:45.67\00:25:46.67
yeah that's right, it
is. It's her love language.
00:25:46.68\00:25:48.67
I've a daughter like
that. and she sends gift to
00:25:49.51\00:25:51.58
Carlos for the little
baby or him or to Rocky and,
00:25:51.59\00:25:55.76
I mean it just
amazes me you know how
00:25:57.28\00:25:58.93
she's been willing
to embrace these boys
00:25:58.94\00:26:01.17
and to work with
them. I just thank God for
00:26:02.75\00:26:05.93
my daughter you know
it's been really hard
00:26:05.94\00:26:08.45
and she's had a
rough inheritance,
00:26:08.46\00:26:10.40
I think a lot of
times we don't understand
00:26:10.41\00:26:12.30
the inheritance that
children receive hinders
00:26:13.82\00:26:17.11
them to some extent
in their response to
00:26:17.12\00:26:20.19
the love of God.
And my inheritance
00:26:20.20\00:26:21.56
I passed on to her
is, not an easy one,
00:26:21.57\00:26:24.85
not an easy one.
We need to remember
00:26:24.86\00:26:26.69
we have be gifted to
our children it keeps
00:26:26.70\00:26:28.62
us humble. That's right,
that's right it sure does.
00:26:28.63\00:26:30.17
Now in the other
hand we can't forget the
00:26:30.18\00:26:31.43
justice, didn't you
have a scripture that
00:26:31.44\00:26:33.13
you wanted to
share with us? Yeah.
00:26:33.14\00:26:34.54
you know in Philippians
1 and verse 6 it's been
00:26:34.90\00:26:38.12
a very favorite
scripture, one of the first ones
00:26:38.13\00:26:39.70
I memorized as a new
Christian, that God given
00:26:39.71\00:26:43.50
us the joy in our life
to know that he is gonna
00:26:43.51\00:26:46.52
finish the work that
he began in our life.
00:26:46.53\00:26:49.13
And that's God
wants us to be in it for
00:26:49.76\00:26:51.45
the long halt. Yes.
Not on again off again,
00:26:51.46\00:26:54.02
but for the long halt, oh amen.
00:26:54.03\00:26:55.64
And it says being
confident of this very thing
00:26:55.65\00:26:57.92
that he which has
begun a good work in you
00:26:59.05\00:27:01.48
will perform it until
the day of Jesus Christ.
00:27:02.54\00:27:05.56
And I just wanna
make that appeal to those
00:27:06.42\00:27:08.29
who are out there,
and families that are less
00:27:08.30\00:27:11.21
than perfect that
there are troubles
00:27:11.22\00:27:13.62
and difficulties, God
is able to help you to
00:27:13.63\00:27:18.68
experience his
love, don't run away,
00:27:18.69\00:27:21.33
don't blame but just
go forward in faith. Amen.
00:27:22.22\00:27:25.40
And I want to
invite you to join us again
00:27:25.41\00:27:29.06
on Thinking about
Home, we're going to have
00:27:29.07\00:27:31.73
prayer now for
those families who may
00:27:31.74\00:27:34.16
have experienced
something like this.
00:27:34.17\00:27:35.67
Rick, would you
pray for us. Yes.
00:27:35.68\00:27:37.14
Father in heaven,
again it's been a great joy
00:27:37.93\00:27:39.88
to be able to
speak of you and what
00:27:40.37\00:27:44.47
a wonderful God you
are. Our minds are so weak
00:27:44.48\00:27:47.62
and feeble to grasp
how deep and how great
00:27:48.54\00:27:54.31
your love is.
You've given us many
00:27:55.22\00:27:57.73
metaphors in the
Bible to explain that.
00:27:57.74\00:28:00.07