Welcome to Thinking about Home. I am Kathy Matthews 00:00:31.08\00:00:33.83 and I am very glad that you are with us again today. 00:00:33.86\00:00:35.80 We've been discussing the subject of redemptive 00:00:35.83\00:00:38.92 discipline, redemptive Church discipline, and we've been 00:00:38.95\00:00:42.02 comparing the principles there as to how we can use it 00:00:42.05\00:00:45.30 in the home. And with us again today is Jay Gallimore, 00:00:45.33\00:00:49.87 the Michigan Conference President of the Seventh-Day 00:00:49.90\00:00:53.54 Adventist Church. Is that okay, Jay? 00:00:53.57\00:00:55.44 Yeah. It's great. I'm glad that you are here 00:00:55.47\00:00:56.95 again with us. Thanks. You can help us to begin to 00:00:56.98\00:01:00.69 understand the process that we need to go through how to 00:01:00.72\00:01:04.62 use on redemptive discipline. Yeah, that's very important 00:01:04.65\00:01:08.79 and usually this is the place of course the people skip to 00:01:08.82\00:01:11.19 the first. We've been one already on the prevention. 00:01:11.22\00:01:14.93 And last time, we talked about the three different 00:01:14.96\00:01:15.93 styles of church discipline and sometimes how that 00:01:17.22\00:01:19.93 affects the home. Right. And we talked about 00:01:19.96\00:01:22.80 judgmental discipline, the punishment, satisfied once 00:01:22.83\00:01:25.95 punished, letting that way to the Day of Judgment, 00:01:25.98\00:01:28.89 and we talked about ostrich discipline, where people just 00:01:28.92\00:01:31.48 basically abandoned in the name of compassion. Right. 00:01:31.51\00:01:34.58 Any kind of response to peoples needs to be restored. 00:01:34.61\00:01:39.48 We talked about David and Bathsheba. And then we 00:01:39.51\00:01:42.90 talked about redemptive discipline. Right. 00:01:42.93\00:01:46.16 The attitude that I'm here to redeem and to restore before 00:01:46.19\00:01:50.11 the Day of Judgment ever gets here. Anyway, 00:01:50.14\00:01:51.58 God would like to have it. That's right. And we talked 00:01:51.61\00:01:54.25 about the similarities, the dissimilarities between 00:01:54.28\00:01:56.63 those two things, and today we wanna talk about 00:01:56.66\00:01:59.31 as you mentioned already, the process. Once a person 00:01:59.34\00:02:02.96 has strayed what do you we do? Right. To bring them back. 00:02:02.99\00:02:06.72 Right. And that's what we mean by process. Right. 00:02:06.75\00:02:09.86 And we have heart breaking Church members out there 00:02:09.89\00:02:13.93 and we have some they don't even understand 00:02:13.96\00:02:16.03 that there is a process and then over into the family and 00:02:16.06\00:02:20.86 the home, we have heart breaking parents. And then 00:02:20.89\00:02:23.56 we have parents that don't understand at all what they 00:02:23.59\00:02:26.17 need to do. Yes. And I think we can help them on this today. 00:02:26.20\00:02:29.53 I hope, I hope it would be a blessing. Okay. 00:02:29.56\00:02:32.29 First of all, we have to ask ourselves a question; 00:02:32.32\00:02:34.72 who is that, that needs to be redeemed? 00:02:34.75\00:02:37.87 Now first of all of course we think about the one lost 00:02:37.90\00:02:40.11 sheep. Right. Obviously, that's the focus of attention 00:02:40.14\00:02:43.66 the individual, who strayed from the fall, right, and 00:02:43.69\00:02:47.10 needs to be brought back. But really we are doing 00:02:47.13\00:02:49.86 more than restoring that individual, you know, 00:02:49.89\00:02:51.46 the scripture refers the body of Christ as the 00:02:51.49\00:02:55.66 body of Christ. Right. So, if my thumb is really 00:02:55.69\00:02:58.70 hurt it affects my whole body Right. And so when one 00:02:58.73\00:03:03.66 member go to stray, we all hurt. Umm! Umm! 00:03:03.69\00:03:06.94 We cannot just have those callous indifference. Right. 00:03:06.97\00:03:09.85 But the sentimentalism brings of. Well, I don't want 00:03:09.88\00:03:13.49 to hurt them at all, really, you know, I'm so sorry, but 00:03:13.52\00:03:16.04 I don't have to get my hands dirty. You know, when the 00:03:16.07\00:03:17.91 shepherd, when the shepherd discovered he had a sheep loss, 00:03:17.94\00:03:22.24 he went to work, I mean, he was out there in the middle 00:03:22.27\00:03:26.47 of the night. He was trucking up and down those hills with 00:03:26.50\00:03:29.81 all the snakes and scorpions. Thank God. 00:03:29.84\00:03:32.26 Yeah, and who ever knows what else is out there you know 00:03:32.29\00:03:33.26 in the middle of the night. He is the one that finds 00:03:35.27\00:03:37.79 the sheep and he gets his hands dirty, so to speak in 00:03:37.82\00:03:41.32 quotes here and finds that sheep and restores the sheep, 00:03:41.35\00:03:42.32 and restoring sheep is not necessarily an easy thing 00:03:45.12\00:03:47.91 to do sometimes it's very difficult. Yeah. And he says, 00:03:47.94\00:03:49.95 follow me. That's right. And we must add, you know, 00:03:49.98\00:03:53.47 I think you are somewhere out there on a mountain side 00:03:53.50\00:03:55.64 in the middle of the night. You are gonna comeback 00:03:55.67\00:03:57.13 with some bruises and cuts. Right. So, there is pain 00:03:57.16\00:04:00.20 involved. We need to recognize that. Yeah. It's not always 00:04:00.23\00:04:02.92 bed of roses without thorns, isn't it? That's right. 00:04:02.95\00:04:05.49 I think you know, parenting is not only, 00:04:06.23\00:04:09.92 you know I remember holding my children, I mentioned 00:04:09.95\00:04:12.00 this before you know little babies and you look in those 00:04:12.03\00:04:14.69 little faces and you think about all the joy and the 00:04:14.72\00:04:17.17 pleasure that is gonna bring you, but so you now don't 00:04:17.20\00:04:19.50 think about some of the pain that every parent has to go 00:04:19.53\00:04:22.66 through if they are going to redemptively discipline in 00:04:22.69\00:04:27.19 training the children correctly. So then we are 00:04:27.22\00:04:29.70 really talking about the necessity of both family 00:04:29.73\00:04:32.93 members and church members to understand their 00:04:32.96\00:04:35.20 responsibility to others. That is the where 00:04:35.23\00:04:37.29 responsibility is a big word. Umm! We have so many 00:04:37.32\00:04:39.90 dysfunctional families today that's why they are falling 00:04:39.93\00:04:42.16 apart and that's why we have so much trouble because 00:04:42.19\00:04:44.31 family doesn't function. I think that's true in a church. 00:04:44.34\00:04:47.34 The church that doesn't have discipline within it, 00:04:47.37\00:04:50.06 really is going to become dysfunctional and pretty soon 00:04:50.09\00:04:53.74 it will either look like some social club, right, or 00:04:53.77\00:04:58.10 something, but it certainly won't reflect the 00:04:58.13\00:05:00.37 New Testament, the vigor of the New Testament Church. 00:05:00.40\00:05:02.91 Right, right, evangelism. That's right. Umm! Umm! 00:05:02.94\00:05:05.75 So we've, first question we are able to have to ask is, 00:05:05.78\00:05:08.31 who is being redeemed? Right. Not only the 00:05:08.34\00:05:10.60 individual, but we also have the name of the Lord Jesus. 00:05:10.63\00:05:14.82 Umm! Umm! We have the Church family 00:05:14.85\00:05:16.49 and we have the community. All needs to be redeemed 00:05:16.52\00:05:19.25 for instance. Community, now you are not 00:05:19.28\00:05:21.10 talking about the general public community? 00:05:21.13\00:05:22.77 Yeah. What else it? What do you mean community? 00:05:22.80\00:05:25.66 Well, you know, when somebody in the church, let's just pull 00:05:25.69\00:05:30.76 something out the air. Let's say somebody is down 00:05:30.79\00:05:33.13 here shoplifting. Umm! The community is injured by that. 00:05:33.16\00:05:37.13 Right. And the community is looking at the church. 00:05:37.16\00:05:39.85 How would the church respond? Will the church just say, 00:05:39.88\00:05:42.54 well, it doesn't matter or you know, we don't want 00:05:42.57\00:05:44.80 to be hard. That was his fault. That's not me. 00:05:44.83\00:05:46.44 Yeah, yeah. We get the church involved in this for 00:05:46.47\00:05:49.01 the right kind of thing. Yeah, right. 00:05:49.04\00:05:50.71 Or, they gonna watch the church and get to redeem 00:05:50.74\00:05:52.97 this person and restore this person. 00:05:53.00\00:05:56.13 Right. Last time, I used an 00:05:56.16\00:05:57.65 illustration about the person been writing bad checks for 00:05:57.68\00:05:59.62 instance. I think we were redeeming the community 00:05:59.65\00:06:02.17 when those merchants got the money from those bad checks. 00:06:02.20\00:06:05.56 Right. I can understand that. The church, they sold the 00:06:05.59\00:06:07.03 Church see, in a very positve role. So, they are 00:06:07.06\00:06:09.80 saying themselves, Oh! The community is being redeemed 00:06:09.83\00:06:12.07 here. Right. And put back right. 00:06:12.10\00:06:13.94 Did I jump ahead on community while you were gonna talk about 00:06:13.97\00:06:16.68 redeeming the Lords name. No, but I think really they go 00:06:16.71\00:06:19.34 together and the most precious one to all of us 00:06:19.37\00:06:25.71 is the savior, who loves us, yes, you know not only to 00:06:25.74\00:06:28.94 created us, but he has redeemed us. And to injure 00:06:28.97\00:06:33.40 him, David caught it well in his Psalm in Psalm 51, 00:06:33.43\00:06:37.27 Against thee and thee only, have I sinned, have I sinned. 00:06:37.30\00:06:39.57 He didn't mean he did not sin against Bathsheba he meant 00:06:39.60\00:06:41.88 he had not sinned against Nathan in the whole nation 00:06:41.91\00:06:43.84 of Israel. But ultimately the Lord owns all of those. 00:06:43.87\00:06:49.79 Right. And it was the Lord himself that he had 00:06:49.82\00:06:52.79 brought grape. Injured. Injury to it, hurt to. 00:06:52.82\00:06:56.52 Right, right. All the Heather nations, 00:06:56.55\00:06:57.52 all the Pagans nations around them, you know, what fun they 00:06:57.55\00:07:01.30 they must have made of David. They knew what this was 00:07:01.33\00:07:03.49 all about. Right. Callahan was well known in 00:07:03.52\00:07:05.31 the Middle East in the name of God. 00:07:05.34\00:07:07.62 When Christians who are obviously members of the 00:07:07.65\00:07:10.31 Church and are functioning the Church and we go out and 00:07:10.34\00:07:14.11 we do bad business practices and we steal from people 00:07:14.14\00:07:19.63 saying that the business transaction. Who is injured 00:07:19.66\00:07:25.24 there? Right. People make fun of the Lord. 00:07:25.27\00:07:28.02 They say, Oh! Such and such is a Christian. Right. You know 00:07:28.05\00:07:31.27 Bring his name down on the dirt. But they bring the 00:07:31.30\00:07:33.43 Lord down. So when the Church responses, this is not right, 00:07:33.46\00:07:36.70 and we appeal to you change his behavior. Right. 00:07:36.73\00:07:39.36 Then the community has to set up. Right. In the name 00:07:39.39\00:07:43.19 of the Lord is redeemed because they say, obviously 00:07:43.22\00:07:45.96 as Christians they don't believe in that because they 00:07:45.99\00:07:47.75 corrected their member. Umm! Umm! Right. 00:07:47.78\00:07:49.41 Correct that member. You know, I see that too 00:07:49.44\00:07:51.52 in parents and family because somehow our child can get an 00:07:51.55\00:07:56.16 idea. Many children get the idea of being very 00:07:56.19\00:07:58.66 independent. And what they do, shouldn't involve 00:07:58.69\00:08:01.99 my parents. It's not you. It's me. Umm! Umm! 00:08:02.02\00:08:04.42 And the parents can endeavor to get this across to a child. 00:08:04.45\00:08:08.66 Is that? Oh! Yes. What you, you are mine, or you 00:08:08.69\00:08:12.34 you belong to this family. Let's put it better way. 00:08:12.37\00:08:14.83 And what you do affects my life and my reputation and 00:08:14.86\00:08:18.15 somehow we've gotten the idea that's not important. 00:08:18.18\00:08:21.09 Yeah. And we need to grasp this as husbands and wives 00:08:21.12\00:08:27.25 as well. You know, what I, when my wife married me 00:08:27.28\00:08:31.24 she became. Ms. Gallimore. That's right. And so what I do 00:08:31.27\00:08:35.42 has a big affect on her. Right. And vice-versa all that 00:08:35.45\00:08:39.65 all the time. And vice-versa. Right, right. 00:08:39.68\00:08:41.44 So we have another area. Yes, we want to, 00:08:41.47\00:08:46.33 I just make sure we talk, I think we talked about the 00:08:46.36\00:08:49.41 injured Church as well. Okay, alright. 00:08:49.44\00:08:50.65 So I think we talked about. The next question we want to 00:08:50.68\00:08:52.69 deal with is the concept, we dealt with a little bit. Am I 00:08:52.72\00:08:57.39 really my brother's keeper? Right. Do I have, do I really 00:08:57.42\00:09:00.76 have responsibility here? And I think that answer is, 00:09:00.79\00:09:04.59 yes, when it means lovingly, confronting, or carefronting 00:09:04.62\00:09:08.25 individual about difficulties. Straying from the Lord 00:09:08.28\00:09:12.58 it means, yes. When we are appealing to an individual to 00:09:12.61\00:09:16.21 return to the Church and return to the Lord Jesus. 00:09:16.24\00:09:19.71 There is probably a time when it means no, we should 00:09:19.74\00:09:23.27 interpret it at least in that. Right. Right. 00:09:23.30\00:09:24.81 If we are using force, if I'm taking in a dull and I, 00:09:25.93\00:09:29.94 I think that it is my duty to cope forces individual. 00:09:29.97\00:09:33.47 Right. To, we can't force the will. We should never try. 00:09:33.50\00:09:38.27 But that makes me think of something, though you are 00:09:38.30\00:09:39.73 talking about force and the dull mind someone who has 00:09:39.76\00:09:43.10 to make their own decisions and now responsible for 00:09:43.13\00:09:45.46 themselves between them and God. That's not exactly 00:09:45.49\00:09:47.91 the way we would do it in the home when a child is small. 00:09:47.94\00:09:51.98 And we were discussing this a little bit ago and I thought 00:09:52.01\00:09:55.01 well, what about force? You know, define force to me. 00:09:55.04\00:09:58.01 And in our discussion, my question was, 00:09:58.04\00:10:01.85 is chastisement for a young member of the family for 00:10:01.88\00:10:07.60 the home now. We are talking about in the home. 00:10:07.63\00:10:10.22 Two year old, three year old something like that is a, 00:10:10.25\00:10:13.94 is a physical chastisement force or is it the result. 00:10:13.97\00:10:18.10 Is it consequences? Well, I think consequence 00:10:18.13\00:10:21.31 is the right word here. I think we need to help 00:10:21.34\00:10:23.07 young people. They have to make the choices. 00:10:23.10\00:10:25.26 The choices. Even very little children. Right. 00:10:25.29\00:10:26.94 Make it choice whether to put their hand on the hot 00:10:26.97\00:10:29.33 stove or not. Right. And there is a obvious 00:10:29.36\00:10:31.39 consequences. And there is obvious consequence here. 00:10:31.42\00:10:32.89 Right or if they are running out in the street then the 00:10:32.92\00:10:35.28 parent is gonna have to step and take consequences 00:10:35.31\00:10:38.09 in order to protect the child really. Right, but I'm not 00:10:38.12\00:10:40.56 talking about that exactly. I'm talking about when there 00:10:40.59\00:10:42.99 is something coming from the hand of parent possibly. 00:10:43.02\00:10:45.16 Yes. And the parent is now used as the tool as, of the 00:10:45.19\00:10:48.70 consequence. Right. You know, now that we don't 00:10:48.73\00:10:52.11 do in Church discipline. That's true. It's a different, 00:10:52.14\00:10:55.13 a little bit different. Right. Application. Okay. So as they 00:10:55.16\00:10:58.29 grow and become responsible and you know adult now and 00:10:58.32\00:11:01.14 the decisions are between you and God. Your choices are 00:11:01.17\00:11:03.34 completely. Right. Without the others. You don't use force. 00:11:03.37\00:11:08.42 Right, and unfortunately in the middle ages the Church 00:11:08.45\00:11:10.82 didn't quite understand that, that's why we have such tragic. 00:11:10.85\00:11:13.61 History. History, tragic history. So then should parents 00:11:13.64\00:11:16.87 have a well thought out process of redemptive 00:11:16.90\00:11:19.92 discipline. Yes, I think that's true at the Church. 00:11:19.95\00:11:23.35 Jesus certainly gave the Church a well thought out 00:11:23.38\00:11:25.77 process for redemptive discipline and what seemed to 00:11:25.80\00:11:27.90 me that parents would need to have as well. Umm! Umm! 00:11:27.93\00:11:31.23 I think they are not ahead of time. Yeah, absolutely 00:11:31.26\00:11:33.45 make a plan. That's right. Well, let's go to what 00:11:33.48\00:11:35.34 Jesus said, how does Jesus get into this and how does 00:11:35.37\00:11:37.87 he redeem. And we want to go to Matthew chapter 18, 00:11:37.90\00:11:40.40 verses 15 and 17 and share that. Here's what Jesus 00:11:40.43\00:11:45.15 had to say, "If your brother sins, 00:11:45.18\00:11:47.73 go and reprove him in private; if he listens to you, 00:11:47.76\00:11:51.61 you have won your brother. If he does not listen to you, 00:11:51.64\00:11:55.30 take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of 00:11:55.33\00:11:58.48 two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed. 00:11:58.51\00:12:01.45 And if he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; 00:12:01.48\00:12:05.04 and if he refuses to listen to the church, let him be 00:12:05.07\00:12:08.13 to you as a taxgatherer." Now that's a very fascinating 00:12:08.16\00:12:12.92 text that Jesus has and there are steps here. And I think 00:12:12.95\00:12:13.92 first of all, I want to say that these steps are not. 00:12:18.16\00:12:22.60 They are not a legalistic checklist. That its often used 00:12:22.63\00:12:27.10 in the judgmental attitude. And okay, we made the visit, 00:12:27.13\00:12:30.23 we took to, and so here, we are here tonight to take 00:12:30.26\00:12:33.56 care of the problem. It's really a method of pursuit 00:12:33.59\00:12:37.08 of loving hearts, fellow strugglers, repented sinners 00:12:37.11\00:12:43.50 going after someone else to bring them home. Amen. 00:12:43.53\00:12:46.90 And we must ever have that attitude redeem. If that 00:12:47.99\00:12:51.50 attitude ever gets lost, it doesn't become a 00:12:51.53\00:12:53.50 redemptive, you know. Umm! Umm! 00:12:53.53\00:12:55.30 It becomes, it becomes something else. And so 00:12:55.33\00:12:59.10 in the family. Yes. So in the family. 00:12:59.13\00:13:02.05 That's right. Because that attitude should not be lost or 00:13:02.08\00:13:05.98 it just become judgmental or ostrich like you were 00:13:06.01\00:13:08.20 talking about before. Right. That what we really 00:13:08.23\00:13:11.14 have here is that Jesus is reaching over and he is 00:13:11.17\00:13:14.50 turning up the knob of influence, this powered 00:13:14.53\00:13:18.29 influence. One of my favorite authors, Ellen White talks 00:13:18.32\00:13:23.95 about the power of personal influence and Jesus here 00:13:23.98\00:13:27.62 has given us an example on the process. How to use that 00:13:27.65\00:13:30.53 influence to redeem people? That will be something like 00:13:30.56\00:13:33.05 peer pressure. Yes, in a good way. Yes okay. 00:13:33.08\00:13:36.78 Because peer pressure seems to have a negative 00:13:36.81\00:13:38.53 connotation, doesn't it, but in a good way. 00:13:38.56\00:13:40.52 That's right. In fact, when the principles of God's 00:13:40.55\00:13:43.85 word are being used by peers. Umm! Umm! It's, it's a 00:13:43.88\00:13:46.68 wonderful thing. This one is going the other way. 00:13:46.71\00:13:49.08 Right, right. That's the bad thing. 00:13:49.11\00:13:50.30 So these are series of appeals that become more intense 00:13:51.32\00:13:55.60 and become more public. Right. Until a person comes 00:13:55.63\00:13:59.46 to the place they have to make a choice between the 00:13:59.49\00:14:02.06 community of faith and their own chosen lifestyle. Right. 00:14:02.09\00:14:06.53 Independent of congregation. There are three steps 00:14:06.56\00:14:11.18 of course that Jesus gave us, and we need to talk about 00:14:11.21\00:14:14.34 those three steps we just read them. First of course is the 00:14:14.37\00:14:17.72 private visit. Jesus says go to person in private and 00:14:17.75\00:14:23.41 Jesus is very clear about that. I think he did that for some 00:14:23.44\00:14:26.21 very good reasons. I can understand that 00:14:26.24\00:14:28.33 in a family life. Do you want me to talk? Can I talk about it 00:14:28.36\00:14:31.95 just little bit before you go into that. 00:14:31.98\00:14:33.47 Yeah, we sure. I wish you would. 00:14:33.50\00:14:34.47 Well, I think of when the time comes and you need to 00:14:34.48\00:14:38.25 take a child or even if a spouse and husband need to be 00:14:38.28\00:14:41.92 talking that, but I think largely of the children 00:14:41.95\00:14:46.09 because of my experiences with my children. 00:14:46.12\00:14:47.81 Strive not to humiliate. You know, most all 00:14:48.37\00:14:53.31 disciplining on our talks if it's possible. Do it in a 00:14:53.34\00:14:56.51 private manner. So that you are not humiliating them, 00:14:56.54\00:14:58.80 you are wining them. And they can respect that 00:14:58.83\00:15:00.81 when I get older mother that he has always tried to keep 00:15:00.84\00:15:03.80 me from being so embarrassed. That's right. 00:15:03.83\00:15:06.49 That communicates love doesn't it? Yes, yes. 00:15:06.52\00:15:09.87 That's the desire. In fact, the New Testaments 00:15:09.90\00:15:13.03 twice it says love covers a multitude sins, multitude sins, 00:15:13.06\00:15:17.59 yes. I love that. Yes what the heavenly father does. 00:15:17.62\00:15:21.41 You know, he said the savior and the savior's blood covers 00:15:21.44\00:15:25.97 a multitude of our sins. I'm grateful to be able to hide. 00:15:26.00\00:15:30.10 I think any repented sinner, any convicted person of his 00:15:30.13\00:15:33.78 own misbehavior and they realize the seriousness 00:15:33.81\00:15:37.06 of that. Right. Just revels under the fact. Amen. 00:15:37.09\00:15:40.84 That they were covered by the blood of Christ. 00:15:40.87\00:15:42.88 It isn't cheap, isn't it? It isn't cheap, it costs great 00:15:42.91\00:15:45.64 deal for God do that, but it demonstrates how 00:15:45.67\00:15:47.62 much he loves me. Right. So, love does cover 00:15:47.65\00:15:50.48 multitude of sins. It doesn't seek to make a matter 00:15:50.51\00:15:52.89 public if it can be avoided. Right. And you know, 00:15:52.92\00:15:57.96 the course of sometimes are already public matters. 00:15:57.99\00:15:59.98 You can't help that. You can avoid that. 00:16:00.01\00:16:02.92 Even then if you can fix it privately it's better. 00:16:02.95\00:16:05.57 I think even that has a better impact on the community. 00:16:05.60\00:16:10.88 Sometimes it can't be if it's a public matter. 00:16:10.91\00:16:13.05 Sometimes it can't be fixed privately. A good 00:16:13.08\00:16:16.37 example of that was Paul and Peter. And quite a story there 00:16:16.40\00:16:20.84 in the Galatians, and if you remember the story but 00:16:20.87\00:16:24.01 they have all been down in a certain place and there 00:16:24.04\00:16:27.36 Peter has been eating with the Gentiles. Oh! Yes. 00:16:27.39\00:16:29.40 Remember that. Yes. Just like Paul had been, 00:16:29.43\00:16:32.35 and then the circumcision party shows up. You know. 00:16:32.38\00:16:35.16 Right. Then Peter changes. And Peter changed. 00:16:35.19\00:16:37.65 Yeah, right. And this scripture is clear 00:16:37.68\00:16:42.10 that Paul took him on publicly and redeem publicly. 00:16:42.13\00:16:44.41 Yes. And I'm sure that Peter must have repented because 00:16:44.44\00:16:47.81 I think by his writing, it's obvious that. 00:16:47.84\00:16:50.30 That he did That he did. 00:16:50.33\00:16:51.59 And so there is some things that need, that have to be 00:16:51.62\00:16:54.86 dealt because we already in a public issue, but 00:16:54.89\00:16:56.96 the nice thing about the private thing is that 00:16:57.64\00:17:00.17 it gives, it provides an opportunity for discovery. 00:17:00.20\00:17:03.99 Umm! Umm! I sometimes uses illustrations, I said, 00:17:04.02\00:17:06.74 you know, in the Adventist Church we have 00:17:07.01\00:17:08.57 in gather and we go around and invite the community 00:17:08.60\00:17:10.90 to help us with our merciful work, feeding 00:17:10.93\00:17:14.86 the poor and all those kinds of things. 00:17:14.89\00:17:16.27 So, suppose a member is driving down the road 00:17:17.03\00:17:20.85 and they see brother X coming at all places 00:17:21.63\00:17:26.52 of Taron because in Adventist Church we 00:17:26.55\00:17:27.93 don't believe, you see drinking and 00:17:27.96\00:17:31.02 That's not good. We don't worry about them, 00:17:31.54\00:17:33.02 Yeah. Real bad, so, runs out, you run on the road and 00:17:33.05\00:17:36.99 here's somebody coming on Taron and appears 00:17:37.02\00:17:40.19 he stumbling when he because it looks like, M, 00:17:40.22\00:17:42.79 and he got two strikes against it. Yeah. 00:17:42.82\00:17:44.02 That's right. So you know what should this person do? 00:17:45.58\00:17:50.12 Well, sometimes what they do is they go to the 00:17:50.15\00:17:52.51 minister, and they say, Pastor, 00:17:52.54\00:17:54.58 I have to tell you this. And then they tell you the 00:17:54.61\00:17:58.16 sorrow sorry. Now what appears to be a sorrow story. 00:17:58.19\00:18:00.97 And then they asks this question. Right. 00:18:01.30\00:18:02.85 They say, now Pastor what are you going to do about it? 00:18:02.88\00:18:07.53 And the real question, I had members do that? 00:18:08.43\00:18:11.88 That I loved, I mean wonderful members, and I was smiling 00:18:12.39\00:18:16.41 and I would say you know the real question is, what 00:18:16.44\00:18:19.96 are you going to do about it? Are you going to do about it? 00:18:19.99\00:18:21.85 I would help you. I will coach you. 00:18:22.54\00:18:24.19 And gone to that person. Yeah. 00:18:24.22\00:18:25.19 And people need not be coached how to go. Right. 00:18:25.20\00:18:27.72 They need the elders to be prepared to help them 00:18:28.16\00:18:29.91 that kind of thing. Right. Then I seen that when I get 00:18:29.94\00:18:33.13 into that they may have discovered that this 00:18:33.16\00:18:36.30 individual, you know, was not in there drinking. 00:18:36.33\00:18:39.35 He may be in their in gathering. 00:18:40.31\00:18:41.67 Well, he may have had use of telephone. 00:18:42.05\00:18:43.93 Oh me. To call his place, that's right. 00:18:43.96\00:18:45.80 Now, we give him a benefit of doubt. That's right or he may 00:18:45.83\00:18:49.32 have, when he came out stumbled in a mud hole. 00:18:49.35\00:18:52.43 So, you added the telephone and mud hole together 00:18:52.75\00:18:55.35 and you got something there. And so this proverb, 00:18:55.38\00:18:58.90 hey, wonderful praise God, you're okay and there 00:18:58.93\00:19:03.11 have been times when I've gone to an individual 00:19:03.14\00:19:05.66 and that may be some similar circumstances. 00:19:05.69\00:19:09.09 And I've said to them, always take the best 00:19:09.26\00:19:12.26 approach to this. I always assume the best, Umm! 00:19:13.22\00:19:16.80 and as you are probably in there, you know, using 00:19:17.07\00:19:19.83 the telephone. And then, And then you wait look. 00:19:19.86\00:19:23.07 I wait and look. Do you. Yeah, I do it. 00:19:23.10\00:19:25.33 It was just my thought. And person would 00:19:25.36\00:19:29.05 sometimes reply, no I wasn't in there, you can read 00:19:29.08\00:19:33.31 it in the face. Right. And say, thus say, you 00:19:33.34\00:19:36.29 have, is there something you need to tell me? Yes. 00:19:36.32\00:19:38.64 You need. I need your help with. They know 00:19:38.67\00:19:40.83 I love them, you know, I'm gonna, you are not out 00:19:40.86\00:19:42.88 to get them out, I have to bring them in, 00:19:42.91\00:19:45.17 right, to help them with that kind of a thing. 00:19:45.20\00:19:47.15 Okay. So that private visit does a lot things, okay, 00:19:47.18\00:19:51.29 that way and. What's the next one 00:19:51.32\00:19:53.61 Well, the next one is the private, I mean, you take 00:19:53.64\00:19:56.17 two witnesses along with you. And it really Jesus 00:19:56.20\00:20:00.66 brought that for me in the Old Testament. Umm! Umm! 00:20:00.69\00:20:02.07 And the ability, the good thing about that is that it's 00:20:02.10\00:20:07.19 a balance. It's a balance in check or check in 00:20:07.22\00:20:10.48 balance we must say. Yes, I can understand this. 00:20:10.51\00:20:12.58 Oh! Let's me tell you other thing to drinking, 00:20:12.61\00:20:13.96 taking the Adventist Church, you know, drinking alcohol 00:20:13.99\00:20:17.70 is an issue for Church discipline. Yes. 00:20:17.73\00:20:20.86 But a vegetarian, being a vegetarian is not that's the 00:20:22.04\00:20:24.57 matter of choice of education. So there are some people, 00:20:24.60\00:20:28.55 who may make a bigger deal out of something and 00:20:28.58\00:20:30.76 then they ought to make a bigger deal. 00:20:30.79\00:20:32.40 So having some other people go with you to 00:20:32.72\00:20:34.50 help establish the facts is very important in the process. 00:20:34.53\00:20:38.86 Umm! Umm! That keeps somebody 00:20:38.98\00:20:40.61 from being unjustly put in the wrong track, Umm! Umm! 00:20:40.64\00:20:44.06 and it also if there is a problem is not just one 00:20:44.16\00:20:47.62 persons word against another. It's, it's established. 00:20:47.65\00:20:50.51 And this is what you are talking about 00:20:50.88\00:20:52.05 turning up the power. That's right. Of influence. 00:20:52.08\00:20:54.81 In the first one, say there is a problem then hopefully 00:20:55.09\00:20:57.56 there is powerful influence, where influence one to 00:20:57.59\00:21:00.96 one can work, but if doesn't, you know, if I am really 00:21:00.99\00:21:05.54 in trouble and I need a help and you can't get to me. 00:21:05.57\00:21:08.39 Umm! Umm! You go get my brother or you get my 00:21:08.42\00:21:11.79 mother or you get somebody a dear friend, 00:21:11.82\00:21:14.28 and you bring that person or two, three of them with me. 00:21:14.31\00:21:16.62 Right. That's power. Umm! Umm! And it has a powerful 00:21:16.65\00:21:19.65 appeal to us, so. That's obviously why 00:21:19.68\00:21:23.28 God gave us two parents. Oh! God, this is 00:21:23.31\00:21:26.53 his preferred plan. I think so, I think that a 00:21:26.56\00:21:30.49 two appealing kids, you know, you can always add 00:21:30.52\00:21:33.71 that power, up the power so to speak in the appeal 00:21:33.74\00:21:37.05 process and try to redeem kids. 00:21:37.08\00:21:38.76 And then we come to the final one and that is the 00:21:40.10\00:21:43.60 Church fear, you got in a person saying, no, no, 00:21:43.63\00:21:45.92 I like what I'm doing. I, you know, this, you might think 00:21:45.95\00:21:49.36 it wrong about, think it wrong, I fear with 00:21:49.39\00:21:50.88 the church teachers. That's why you interpreted. 00:21:50.91\00:21:52.84 Yeah. I'm gonna keep on down this way. 00:21:52.87\00:21:54.87 There is nothing wrong with what I'm doing. 00:21:54.90\00:21:56.96 And now the three witnesses also, 00:21:56.99\00:22:00.36 yeah, there is a big problem, and no appeals are working, 00:22:00.39\00:22:02.89 sweet love is not working, doing everything you can 00:22:02.92\00:22:05.87 then you go to the church. Now after what happens here. 00:22:06.49\00:22:10.57 Umm! Umm! Is, that the Church here is 00:22:10.60\00:22:13.06 it and makes the decision. May be they fellowship 00:22:13.09\00:22:16.13 somebody or put them on sin or something to that 00:22:16.16\00:22:18.87 affect or probation or period of graces. 00:22:18.90\00:22:21.27 I would like to call it. Right. But there is often a 00:22:21.30\00:22:26.28 step that's missed. What's that? 00:22:26.31\00:22:28.59 Well, Jesus says this, because right long 00:22:28.62\00:22:31.59 with everything else. He says if they do not 00:22:31.62\00:22:34.44 listen to the church then let they be like a tax gather. 00:22:34.47\00:22:39.32 So there needs to be another step in there. 00:22:39.35\00:22:42.63 Oh! The Church, everyone needs to 00:22:42.66\00:22:44.69 collectively go. Yes. Okay. Everyone now is collectively 00:22:44.72\00:22:49.15 appealing. I see. To this individual. 00:22:49.18\00:22:51.29 So, we are turning up all the power we've got to 00:22:51.32\00:22:53.94 bring this person back. All the voices of love. 00:22:53.97\00:22:56.91 Mummy, daddy, elder brothers, younger one, sisters. 00:22:56.94\00:22:59.56 Everybody is getting in this. And uncles, grandmas. 00:22:59.59\00:23:01.77 That's right. We all say, we can't lose you to precious 00:23:01.80\00:23:04.75 turn away from this, whatever. 00:23:04.78\00:23:06.56 Now, you know, Churches may take different forms, 00:23:06.59\00:23:08.71 I mean it's in delegations. There may not everybody 00:23:08.74\00:23:10.80 get into the, but the Church has a plan to try to, only 00:23:10.83\00:23:14.16 then when they say to the Church, no. Umm! Umm! 00:23:14.19\00:23:17.99 I don't think that I wanna go this way. 00:23:18.73\00:23:21.42 Only then, do you take that step that this fellowships 00:23:22.07\00:23:28.26 are promised. Right. You know, even the 00:23:28.29\00:23:30.34 prodigal son win his way. The story of the prodigal 00:23:30.37\00:23:35.01 son has so many pictures to it, but one picture we 00:23:35.04\00:23:41.76 often don't talk about are the prodigals 00:23:41.79\00:23:45.10 who never come home. Right. I do you believe though, 00:23:45.13\00:23:50.36 that looking at the story of the prodigal son for a moment. 00:23:50.82\00:23:53.26 Let the father has painful it is was for his son to 00:23:55.02\00:23:57.92 leave home. And I think he left home because the 00:23:57.95\00:24:00.59 father was not willing to change. Right. 00:24:00.62\00:24:02.94 The father had the right principles and to change 00:24:02.97\00:24:05.55 the right principles would be destroyed the home 00:24:05.58\00:24:07.43 that would be no home for the prodigal son to come back to. 00:24:07.46\00:24:10.05 But, because of father held firm to his principles and 00:24:10.74\00:24:14.12 even though his child left, he must have broke his heart. 00:24:14.15\00:24:16.43 Right. The fact that he was there faithful to his 00:24:16.46\00:24:20.46 principles, gave an opportunity for the 00:24:20.49\00:24:23.67 prodigal son to come home. Amen. 00:24:23.70\00:24:25.31 So, by being faithful to our principles actually is a 00:24:25.84\00:24:28.18 more powerful insane to bring people home. 00:24:28.21\00:24:30.87 So, when he was out in a pig pens and began a 00:24:30.90\00:24:32.59 member how loving dad was all those good things. 00:24:32.62\00:24:35.53 Right. And it's fascinating that he went home 00:24:35.56\00:24:37.09 repentant prodigal. He is in the home saying, dad, 00:24:37.12\00:24:39.91 okay, I'm back now, and I know you love me, so 00:24:39.94\00:24:41.62 you have made a few changes haven't you 00:24:41.65\00:24:43.01 during the last visit. Absolutely. He came 00:24:43.04\00:24:44.36 home repented. And we often don't talk about that 00:24:44.39\00:24:46.67 aspect of how he fell on his knees before the father. 00:24:46.70\00:24:49.19 That's right. You know, Jay our time 00:24:49.22\00:24:51.54 is running out, you want mother area is covered. 00:24:51.57\00:24:53.78 Well, I know, we need to keep going down here 00:24:54.31\00:24:56.13 just a little bit, I think we are doing okay. 00:24:56.16\00:24:57.68 I won't you make that prodigal son 00:24:57.71\00:25:00.61 for just a moment. Okay. Because again we are 00:25:00.64\00:25:02.67 talking about the process. I want to emphasize this 00:25:02.70\00:25:08.19 point again that some people think that if you actual 00:25:08.22\00:25:14.44 stick to your principles and enact loving Church discipline. 00:25:14.47\00:25:18.00 Right. You are actually run people away. I don't believe 00:25:18.03\00:25:21.16 that Jesus was wrong. I think Jesus was right. 00:25:21.19\00:25:24.39 That if loving Church discipline is actually put 00:25:24.42\00:25:27.50 into process that you will actually see people not 00:25:27.53\00:25:31.53 only stay in the Church, but you will also redeem 00:25:31.56\00:25:34.37 them and even though once that leave will be 00:25:34.40\00:25:36.62 attracted back to the loving community that's there. 00:25:36.65\00:25:39.90 Umm! So Jesus way is something we should trust. 00:25:39.93\00:25:43.93 We must trust Jesus. And he didn't give us, you 00:25:43.96\00:25:46.83 know, Jesus himself gave us this information. Right. 00:25:46.86\00:25:48.65 And yet people just. Don't want to use it. 00:25:49.32\00:25:52.04 They don't' want to use that, that kind of thing. 00:25:52.07\00:25:54.61 Okay. One of the challenges that's happening nowadays 00:25:54.64\00:25:59.06 is that often the Church is, is what should I say, 00:25:59.09\00:26:03.12 unwilling to dress it quickly. People need 00:26:03.15\00:26:06.27 dress things quickly. Don't' let the thing 00:26:06.30\00:26:08.24 roll down the road. Just build. Yeah. 00:26:08.27\00:26:10.67 Yeah. Otherwise it takes a lot, it's a lot harder to 00:26:10.70\00:26:14.05 get people redeem, right, are they may get into 00:26:14.08\00:26:16.53 behavior that's even worse. Right. You know when you start 00:26:16.56\00:26:19.38 seeing it is when it needs to be, to be worked with. 00:26:19.41\00:26:23.02 Well, let's if we recovering everything 00:26:25.74\00:26:27.18 that we want to hear. I mentioned earlier that 00:26:27.21\00:26:30.70 redemptive discipline is not just the minister's matter. 00:26:30.73\00:26:32.89 I will need to emphasis that. It's everybody's. 00:26:32.92\00:26:35.78 Jesus, when he talk at Matthew 18, did not talk 00:26:36.12\00:26:38.88 about just the disciples doing redemptive discipline. 00:26:38.91\00:26:43.08 It's everybody is involved? So we have to 00:26:43.11\00:26:44.96 create both the culture preventative as well as 00:26:44.99\00:26:47.35 being able to bring people back. 00:26:47.38\00:26:49.48 Titus, talks about grandmothers in Israel. 00:26:49.93\00:26:51.86 We need grandfathers in Israel. 00:26:52.37\00:26:53.74 We need family members doing things to help 00:26:53.77\00:26:57.03 people come back. I again come back to your 00:26:57.06\00:26:59.28 interdependence thing for we really all need one 00:26:59.31\00:27:02.85 another in this redemptive process. 00:27:02.88\00:27:05.69 So this fellowshipping is done in the hope that in 00:27:06.35\00:27:09.70 the absence of Church fellowship that the airing 00:27:09.73\00:27:12.92 one might become homesick. Oh, Amen. And come home. 00:27:12.95\00:27:17.05 Amen. That's a good one to put in. 00:27:17.08\00:27:18.97 This fellowshipping is never mean that we treat 00:27:19.00\00:27:20.66 people with disrespect. It is a change in 00:27:20.69\00:27:22.98 the relationship. But, it is never disrespectful. 00:27:23.01\00:27:27.62 It may mean that there are not integrated into 00:27:29.82\00:27:31.80 community anymore. Right. There needs to be sins of 00:27:31.83\00:27:34.58 the difference. Umm! But, they need to know 00:27:34.61\00:27:38.74 that they are still loved and the efforts for them. 00:27:38.77\00:27:40.98 Don't ever stop. Amen. We need to be alert enough. 00:27:41.01\00:27:44.52 Don't need to recognize the warning signs. 00:27:44.55\00:27:47.04 That's right. Thank you brother Gallimore. 00:27:47.07\00:27:48.66 We are gonna talk about forgiveness 00:27:48.69\00:27:49.81 next time, are we? Yes, we are. 00:27:49.84\00:27:51.39 Okay. And I want to thank you for joining us. 00:27:51.42\00:27:53.78 I hope these things are going to be useful in your 00:27:53.81\00:27:55.95 home. Join us again on Thinking about Home. 00:27:55.98\00:27:57.97