Hello, friends,
I'm Jill Morikone
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and we're delighted
that you've joined us
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for 3ABN Sabbath School Panel.
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Hard to believe
we're on lesson number 7,
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Rest, Relationships and Healing.
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We're gonna actually
continue the story of Joseph
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that we began last week.
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I want to encourage
you to grab your Bibles
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and your pens and your notebooks
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and your Adult Bible Study Guide
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that you can
study along with us.
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If you don't have your own copy,
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you can go to
the following website
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ABSG.Adventist.org
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that stands for
AdultBibleStudyGuide
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.Adventist.org
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Download that so you'll be ready
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for this edition of
3ABN Sabbath School Panel.
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What a joy it is to
journey through the Word of God.
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What a joy it is to spend
time with you our 3ABN family
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and with our 3ABN
family here on the set.
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I want to introduce
them to you at this time,
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to my left Pastor Ryan Day.
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Privileged to
have you here, Brother.
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Amen.
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So thankful to be a
part of this wonderful panel
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and today we're
gonna be talking about
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one of my favorite
Bible stories, Joseph.
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Amen.
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So yeah, I'm
dealing with Joseph.
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Amen.
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To your left my
sister Shelley Quinn,
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joy to have you here.
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It's always a
pleasure and a privilege
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to study with you
and to study with you.
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Amen.
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Pastor John Dinzey,
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privileged to
have you here, Pastor.
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It's a blessing to be
here. It's a blessing.
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Amen.
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Last but not least,
Pastor John Lomacang.
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Thank you, Pastor
John, for what you do.
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You know, this is
a powerful lesson,
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finding rest and forgiveness.
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And I'm just excited about it.
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Because I think
this is one of the topics
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that people tend to probably
not be well informed about.
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And I'm praying
for a chance today
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to open some doors.
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Amen.
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Before we go any further
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we want to go to
the Lord in prayer.
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Pastor Ryan,
would you pray for us?
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Sure. Absolutely.
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Our Father in heaven
Lord, here we are again,
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another study here on
3ABN Sabbath School Panel.
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We have you to thank Lord,
for all of the powerful lessons
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that we've been
diving deep into,
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we've been picking
apart the Word of God
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to learn Your will
for our life, Lord.
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And here we are again today,
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we're talking about forgiveness.
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And, Lord, we need to
know Your heart on forgiveness.
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So give us the
Holy Spirit, Lord,
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make the Word just amplified
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by in our
hearts and minds, Lord,
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and more than
anything help us to see
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the lovingkindness
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and the
character of Jesus Christ
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through this study,
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as it goes out
all around the world.
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Bless us, Lord,
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and draw us
closer as I always pray
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to our Savior Jesus Christ,
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we ask in Jesus' name, amen.
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Amen.
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Last week, of
course, we studied Joseph
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and we looked at the
dysfunction of his family.
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We look at how he
made a choice for God.
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He found his self worth in God,
the way that he stood for God,
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regardless of the temptations
that were there in Egypt,
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him being thrown in prison
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and then being
elevated to prime minister.
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This week, we look specifically
at the role of forgiveness,
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and what that plays
in our relationships
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in the healing
that we need in rest.
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I sat in the chair,
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my hands tightly
clenched together
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to keep them from shaking.
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I would not give
him the satisfaction
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of seeing how
much his words hurt.
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Fighting back
tears, I still remember it
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as if it were yesterday,
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I willed my mind to
another place anywhere
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just to get out of the room.
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Each word, each accusation,
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each lie, it
pierced my heart deeper.
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Somehow, finally, it was over
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and I made it to
the door and I left.
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And the days the weeks
and months that followed,
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those words, they haunted me,
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Satan used them to
torment and to taunt me.
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I wanted to forgive and forget.
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But the pain of what that,
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what happened that
day, stayed with me.
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Forgiveness does not mean
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that what the other
person did to us is right.
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It simply frees us
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from constantly being
damaged by that person.
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Forgiveness, it
frees us from bitterness.
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Forgiveness, it
frees us from resentment.
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Forgiveness brings
with it indescribable peace.
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It's like a burden that
is rolled off your back.
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You know, they say unforgiveness
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is like drinking poison,
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hoping that the
other person is gonna die.
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Unforgiveness,
it only hurts you.
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Each member of the panel,
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we're gonna be
talking about Joseph
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and that journey in forgiveness.
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And I know I have my own journey
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and how God led me to
forgive in that situation.
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But let's look
at our memory text.
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Genesis 45:5.
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But now, this
is Joseph speaking.
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"Do not therefore be grieved
or angry with yourselves,
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because you sold me here.
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For God He sent me
before you to preserve life."
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On Sunday we look
at facing the past.
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We already
talked last week about
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how Joseph's home
was dysfunctional.
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There was envy and
jealousy and bitterness
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and revenge and
desire for power.
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There was lust,
there was sexual sin.
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Joseph's brothers
wanted to kill him
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and they sold him
as a slave into Egypt.
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He made a choice on that journey
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to serve the
God of his father's.
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He was a slave, of
course, in Potiphar's house.
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He was thrown into prison
on a trumped up unjust charge.
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He was released from prison,
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and made the
prime minister of Egypt
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at the age, the young age,
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Pastor Ryan of
30, prime minister,
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second in command to the king.
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There were seven years of plenty
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in the land of Egypt,
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where Joseph
married had two children,
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and he stored up food
for the coming famine.
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Then the seven
years of famine began
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and the famine
reached all the way to Canaan.
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And that's where
we pick up the story.
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We're in Genesis Chapter 42.
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Genesis 42:1-4,
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when Jacob,
that's Joseph's daddy,
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he hadn't seen them
for many, many years,
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"When Jacob saw that
there was grain in Egypt,
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Jacob said to his sons,
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'Why do you
look at one another?'
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And he said,
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'Indeed I have heard
that there is grain in Egypt,
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go down to that
place and buy for us there,
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that we may live and not die.'"
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So Joseph's 10
brothers went down
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to buy grain in Egypt.
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But Jacob did not send
Joseph's brother, Benjamin
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with his brothers, for he said,
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"Lest some
calamity overfall him."
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So we see from this
passage that Joseph's father,
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he's still alive,
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that the famine has extended
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all the way to
the land of Canaan,
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that Jacob now
favors his brother Benjamin.
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Remember, he favored
Joseph all those years before.
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Now he favors Benjamin.
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And yet, he still mourns
the loss of his son, Joseph.
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Let's jump down to verse 6.
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This is when Joseph
sees his brothers again.
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Genesis 42:6,
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"Now Joseph was
governor over the land,
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and it was he who sold to
all the people of the land,
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and Joseph's brothers
came and bowed down before him
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with their faces to the earth,
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just like in the dream
all those years before.
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Joseph saw his
brothers and recognized them,
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but he acted as
a stranger to them
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and spoke roughly to them.
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Then he said,
'Where do you come from?'
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And they said,
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'From the land of
Canaan to buy food.'
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So Joseph
recognized his brothers,
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but they did
not recognize him.'"
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Probably 21 years have passed
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since Joseph's
brothers sold him into slavery.
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He's all grown up.
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He's wearing Egyptian clothes.
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He's the second in command
to the king and the brothers,
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they don't recognize him at all,
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but he surely recognize them.
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And so what's fascinating to me,
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why did he
speak roughly to them?
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I always wondered
that, in the story
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why did he
speak roughly to them?
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First of all, it
was to test them,
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had they really changed.
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Were they kind men
now instead of harsh?
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Were they humble men
instead of jealous and proud?
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Who were they really now?
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Had they truly repented?
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And also was a
lesson brought out.
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It was to ascertain
the welfare of his father
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and other brother
Benjamin in Egypt.
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He was worried about them,
you know, he's out of the way.
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Joseph had power on them.
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He had power in Egypt,
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he could have easily
taken revenge on his brothers.
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But instead, he's
worried about his family,
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his father and
his brother Benjamin.
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Had the brothers
somehow transferred
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their jealousy from him
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over to Benjamin,
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where they changed men?
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In Genesis 42:13, we
see, the brothers say,
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"Your servants are 12 brothers,
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the sons of one man
in the land of Canaan.
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In fact, the youngest
is with our father today,
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and one is no more."
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So Joseph gets the
answer he's looking for,
00:09:12.88\00:09:15.05
his dad is still alive,
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and his little brother
Benjamin is still alive as well.
00:09:17.29\00:09:20.96
So Joseph accuses
them of being spies,
00:09:20.99\00:09:23.39
wants to keep them in Egypt.
00:09:23.43\00:09:24.76
He really wants to see Benjamin
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and make sure Benjamin is okay.
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He puts the three brothers
in prison for three days,
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the brothers in
prison for three days.
00:09:32.13\00:09:33.97
And then he says,
if you're honest men,
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let one of the
brothers stay here
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and the rest of you.
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You can go back home to daddy,
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but make sure that
next time you come,
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your brother
Benjamin is with you.
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You know what's interesting?
00:09:48.95\00:09:50.29
Joseph now was in
a position of power.
00:09:50.32\00:09:52.75
Joseph was in a
position to exact revenge.
00:09:52.79\00:09:56.22
But instead of that,
00:09:56.26\00:09:58.63
Joseph is concerned
about the welfare of others.
00:09:58.66\00:10:02.66
He's concerned about
the welfare of his father,
00:10:02.70\00:10:05.20
and the welfare of
his brother, Benjamin.
00:10:05.23\00:10:09.17
People are important.
00:10:09.20\00:10:10.71
They should be important to us
00:10:10.74\00:10:12.57
because they're
clearly important to God.
00:10:12.61\00:10:15.48
We are all created
in the image of God.
00:10:15.51\00:10:17.91
We are brothers and sisters.
00:10:17.95\00:10:20.05
I think about the
sheep and the goats.
00:10:20.08\00:10:21.58
This is Matthew 25.
00:10:21.62\00:10:23.05
And remember, Jesus separated
the sheep and the goats
00:10:23.08\00:10:25.39
and those on the left hand,
00:10:25.42\00:10:26.99
He said to depart from him
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and be cursed into
everlasting destruction.
00:10:28.39\00:10:30.83
Well, that's pretty harsh.
00:10:30.86\00:10:32.19
What did they do
00:10:32.23\00:10:33.56
to deserve such a
terrible punishment?
00:10:33.60\00:10:35.86
They neglected the hungry.
00:10:35.90\00:10:37.57
They ignored the
hurting and the suffering.
00:10:37.60\00:10:40.10
They overlooked the sick.
00:10:40.14\00:10:42.60
They judged the prisoner.
00:10:42.64\00:10:45.47
We have a responsibility
for the care of others.
00:10:45.51\00:10:49.98
I want to talk just a moment
00:10:50.01\00:10:51.35
about the difference between
00:10:51.38\00:10:52.71
a healthy relationship
and an abusive relationship.
00:10:52.75\00:10:56.48
A healthy relationship
is built on unselfish love.
00:10:56.52\00:10:59.65
An abusive
relationship is built on fear.
00:10:59.69\00:11:02.62
Healthy relationship
is built on freedom.
00:11:02.66\00:11:05.66
An abusive relationship is
built on power and control.
00:11:05.69\00:11:09.63
A healthy
relationship is built on trust.
00:11:09.66\00:11:12.50
An abusive relationship
is built on suspicion.
00:11:12.53\00:11:16.40
A healthy relationship
is built on security.
00:11:16.44\00:11:19.17
An abusive relationship
is built on uncertainty.
00:11:19.21\00:11:22.68
A healthy
relationship owns mistakes
00:11:22.71\00:11:25.08
and accepts responsibility.
00:11:25.11\00:11:27.78
An abusive relationship
blames the other person.
00:11:27.82\00:11:31.02
A healthy relationship
is built on respect.
00:11:31.05\00:11:33.76
An abusive relationship
is built on intimidation.
00:11:33.79\00:11:37.36
A healthy relationship
is built on honesty.
00:11:37.39\00:11:40.10
An abusive relationship
is built on manipulation.
00:11:40.13\00:11:43.57
A healthy relationship
is built on unselfishness.
00:11:43.60\00:11:47.04
An abusive
relationship is built on self.
00:11:47.07\00:11:50.97
I want to talk just a
moment for those of you
00:11:51.01\00:11:53.98
who might be trapped right
now in an abusive relationship.
00:11:54.01\00:11:58.18
This could be sexual abuse,
it could be emotional abuse,
00:11:58.21\00:12:00.92
it could be physical abuse,
and you say there's no way out.
00:12:00.95\00:12:04.45
"Jill, I don't
know how to get out.
00:12:04.49\00:12:05.92
I am trapped.
00:12:05.95\00:12:07.42
I want to be free,
00:12:07.46\00:12:09.09
but I don't
know how to get out."
00:12:09.12\00:12:12.66
I want to give you four keys.
00:12:12.69\00:12:14.03
Number one,
00:12:14.06\00:12:15.40
there is no excuse for abuse.
00:12:15.43\00:12:17.87
An abuse is the result of sin.
00:12:17.90\00:12:22.10
Proverbs 10:6,
00:12:22.14\00:12:23.81
"Blessings are in the
head of the righteous,
00:12:23.84\00:12:25.51
but violence,
00:12:25.54\00:12:26.88
it covers the
mouth of the wicked."
00:12:26.91\00:12:29.41
It is a result
of Adam and Eve sin
00:12:29.44\00:12:31.61
and by extension
00:12:31.65\00:12:32.98
all the way down
00:12:33.01\00:12:34.35
the sin that is
in this world today.
00:12:34.38\00:12:36.62
It's a result of Satan's world
00:12:36.65\00:12:38.55
and Satan's design
00:12:38.59\00:12:40.29
that brings abuse.
00:12:40.32\00:12:41.66
Abuse is clearly
the result of sin.
00:12:41.69\00:12:43.93
Key number two, God hates abuse.
00:12:43.96\00:12:47.90
Proverbs 11:5,
00:12:47.93\00:12:49.40
"The Lord
investigates the righteous,
00:12:49.43\00:12:51.23
but the wicked and
the one who loves violence
00:12:51.27\00:12:53.20
His soul hates."
00:12:53.23\00:12:54.77
Now that doesn't
mean God hates the abuser.
00:12:54.80\00:12:57.07
But God hates abuse.
00:12:57.11\00:12:59.67
Key number three,
00:12:59.71\00:13:01.04
it is not your fault.
00:13:01.08\00:13:02.48
Hear me right now.
00:13:02.51\00:13:03.98
No matter what kind of
abuse you have experienced,
00:13:04.01\00:13:07.05
there is nothing you can do.
00:13:07.08\00:13:08.78
Nothing you can say,
00:13:08.82\00:13:10.39
nothing you think
00:13:10.42\00:13:11.75
that makes you
deserving of that abuse.
00:13:11.79\00:13:14.46
There is no
mistake you could have made
00:13:14.49\00:13:16.32
and no sin you
could have committed
00:13:16.36\00:13:19.09
to make you
deserving of violence.
00:13:19.13\00:13:21.26
You did not deserve this.
00:13:21.30\00:13:22.93
It is never your fault.
00:13:22.96\00:13:26.70
God has a plan for your life.
00:13:26.74\00:13:28.07
Jeremiah 29:11,
00:13:28.10\00:13:30.31
"It is better the plan He has
00:13:30.34\00:13:32.21
the thoughts He has
toward us is better and higher
00:13:32.24\00:13:35.01
than we could
have ever imagined."
00:13:35.04\00:13:37.25
Key number four,
00:13:37.28\00:13:38.61
God, He can bring deliverance.
00:13:38.65\00:13:40.42
2 Samuel 22:47,
00:13:40.45\00:13:43.08
"The Lord lives,
blessed be my rock.
00:13:43.12\00:13:45.65
Let God be exalted
the rock of my salvation.
00:13:45.69\00:13:48.32
It is God who avenges
me and subdues the people.
00:13:48.36\00:13:51.69
He delivers me from my enemies.
00:13:51.73\00:13:53.80
You also lift me up above
those who rise against me,
00:13:53.83\00:13:56.67
You have delivered me
from the violent man."
00:13:56.70\00:13:59.43
God brings deliverance.
00:13:59.47\00:14:00.80
Sometimes that deliverance
comes through a direct miracle,
00:14:00.84\00:14:03.04
divine intervention.
00:14:03.07\00:14:04.47
Sometimes it comes from a choice
00:14:04.51\00:14:06.21
to leave the abuser and
seek protection and safety.
00:14:06.24\00:14:09.51
Sometimes it comes
through outside intervention,
00:14:09.54\00:14:12.55
but God can bring deliverance,
healing and restoration.
00:14:12.58\00:14:16.82
Amen.
00:14:16.85\00:14:18.19
Thank you so much Jill.
00:14:18.22\00:14:19.55
Appreciate, you
set that up perfectly.
00:14:19.59\00:14:21.32
And I'm gonna
continue to set it up
00:14:21.36\00:14:22.99
because Monday's
lesson is entitled
00:14:23.02\00:14:25.29
"Setting the Stage".
00:14:25.33\00:14:27.10
And as I mentioned earlier,
00:14:27.13\00:14:28.66
this is one of
my favorite stories,
00:14:28.70\00:14:30.27
Joseph, I just, I love it.
00:14:30.30\00:14:31.90
I love the story so much.
00:14:31.93\00:14:33.87
It's a story of redemption.
00:14:33.90\00:14:35.24
It's a story of forgiveness.
00:14:35.27\00:14:36.64
And it's a story of unification
00:14:36.67\00:14:39.24
of those people that
were separated for so long,
00:14:39.27\00:14:41.64
obviously Joseph and his family.
00:14:41.68\00:14:44.25
But what's powerful as
I'm gonna kind of reiterate
00:14:44.28\00:14:46.08
just a few things
that you brought out.
00:14:46.11\00:14:47.68
Up to this point,
we can be sure that
00:14:47.72\00:14:49.52
Joseph has already
forgiven his brothers now
00:14:49.55\00:14:52.09
as to when that
actually took place in the past.
00:14:52.12\00:14:54.82
We know that it
had happened obviously
00:14:54.86\00:14:56.42
because the Lord
probably wouldn't have been
00:14:56.46\00:14:57.79
able to continue to use Joseph
00:14:57.83\00:15:00.40
if he still had that hatred
and that unforgiving spirit
00:15:00.43\00:15:03.83
within his heart,
00:15:03.87\00:15:05.20
otherwise it would have damaged
00:15:05.23\00:15:06.57
his relationship with the Lord.
00:15:06.60\00:15:07.94
But sometime in
times past between,
00:15:07.97\00:15:09.50
you know, the time
that Joseph was in prison,
00:15:09.54\00:15:11.37
and now he chose,
he made the decision
00:15:11.41\00:15:14.04
to give that over to the Lord.
00:15:14.08\00:15:15.54
And he chose to
forgive his brothers.
00:15:15.58\00:15:17.35
But just because he
chose to forgive his brothers
00:15:17.38\00:15:19.55
doesn't mean he's forgotten.
00:15:19.58\00:15:20.95
And at this point,
00:15:20.98\00:15:22.68
we see that he continues
to put them to the test.
00:15:22.72\00:15:25.35
So as he has given
them instruction to go back,
00:15:25.39\00:15:27.56
and now retrieve
their brother, Benjamin
00:15:27.59\00:15:29.86
and bring him back.
00:15:29.89\00:15:31.23
And he's also now determined
00:15:31.26\00:15:32.59
that he's gonna
keep one of them.
00:15:32.63\00:15:33.96
Now notice the
conversation that happens,
00:15:34.00\00:15:36.77
because while
Joseph has forgiven them,
00:15:36.80\00:15:40.00
he's still a little leery
as to have they really changed
00:15:40.04\00:15:42.84
or are they the
same individuals.
00:15:42.87\00:15:44.64
And so he goes through
this multiple step process
00:15:44.67\00:15:47.31
in which he puts
them to the test.
00:15:47.34\00:15:49.24
And I think this
was good for everyone
00:15:49.28\00:15:51.21
in the sense that
it's gonna actually
00:15:51.25\00:15:52.71
in the end bring them closer.
00:15:52.75\00:15:54.42
And it's gonna bring
even more healing to,
00:15:54.45\00:15:57.12
I believe Joseph's
heart and mind to know that
00:15:57.15\00:15:59.42
through all of this process,
00:15:59.45\00:16:00.89
his brothers really have changed
00:16:00.92\00:16:02.52
that they're not
the same individuals.
00:16:02.56\00:16:04.33
And so notice here, Genesis 42,
00:16:04.36\00:16:06.36
I'm gonna begin in verse 21.
00:16:06.39\00:16:08.43
And we're gonna
read on to verse 24.
00:16:08.46\00:16:10.17
So notice what it
says here, it says,
00:16:10.20\00:16:11.53
"Then they said to one another,"
00:16:11.57\00:16:12.90
because remember, Joseph
has given them the message,
00:16:12.93\00:16:15.14
go back and get your
brother and bring them back.
00:16:15.17\00:16:16.91
Now they start to kind of,
they're a little bit upset,
00:16:16.94\00:16:20.11
you know, because they recognize
00:16:20.14\00:16:21.61
what he's asking them to do.
00:16:21.64\00:16:23.35
So they say to one another,
00:16:23.38\00:16:24.71
"We are truly guilty
concerning our brother,
00:16:24.75\00:16:27.58
for we saw the
anguish of his soul
00:16:27.62\00:16:30.15
when he pleaded with
us, and we would not hear,
00:16:30.19\00:16:33.59
therefore this
distress has come upon us.
00:16:33.62\00:16:37.49
And Reuben answered
and said to them, saying,
00:16:37.53\00:16:40.90
'Did I not speak to you, saying,
00:16:40.93\00:16:43.13
'Do not sin against the
boy, and you would not listen?
00:16:43.16\00:16:46.74
Therefore behold, his
blood is now required of us.'
00:16:46.77\00:16:50.61
But they did not know
that Joseph understood them,
00:16:50.64\00:16:53.54
for he was speaking to
them through an interpreter.
00:16:53.58\00:16:56.14
And he turned himself
away from them and wept.
00:16:56.18\00:16:59.78
Then he returned to them
again, and talked with them.
00:16:59.81\00:17:02.65
And he took Simeon from them
00:17:02.68\00:17:04.85
and bound him
before their eyes."
00:17:04.89\00:17:07.36
I find it interesting that
00:17:07.39\00:17:08.72
Reuben is the one who spoke up
00:17:08.76\00:17:10.09
because if you remember
back early on in the story,
00:17:10.13\00:17:11.96
Ruben was the
one when they said,
00:17:11.99\00:17:13.33
hey, let's just
throw him in this pit
00:17:13.36\00:17:14.76
and kill him, right?
00:17:14.80\00:17:16.13
Or and they, actually they just
wanted to kill him in general.
00:17:16.16\00:17:18.40
They didn't even bring
in the pit in the story.
00:17:18.43\00:17:20.54
And Ruben stepped in
said, No, no, no, look,
00:17:20.57\00:17:22.40
let's just toss him in this pit.
00:17:22.44\00:17:23.77
Teach him a lesson.
00:17:23.81\00:17:25.14
But no, we cannot bring
bad news back to our father
00:17:25.17\00:17:27.74
who loves Joseph so much,
00:17:27.78\00:17:29.18
we're not gonna
kill this brother.
00:17:29.21\00:17:30.55
So Reuben actually
came to Joseph's aid.
00:17:30.58\00:17:33.48
So now he's speaking again,
00:17:33.52\00:17:35.52
almost like a judgment
against them to remind them,
00:17:35.55\00:17:37.82
look, we're in this situation
00:17:37.85\00:17:39.79
because of what
you guys have done.
00:17:39.82\00:17:41.82
But also Ruben
recognizes that he's not,
00:17:41.86\00:17:44.23
you know, he's, you know,
00:17:44.26\00:17:45.59
his hands aren't washed
clean from the situation,
00:17:45.63\00:17:47.33
because he even went
along with lying to their father
00:17:47.36\00:17:49.90
all these years
over this situation.
00:17:49.93\00:17:52.23
But it's
interesting to the story says
00:17:52.27\00:17:53.97
that Joseph heard them say this,
00:17:54.00\00:17:56.04
he broke away for a
moment, and he wept.
00:17:56.07\00:17:59.04
You could just see
that in this moment,
00:17:59.07\00:18:01.08
he's seeing a glimpse
that maybe they have changed,
00:18:01.11\00:18:04.51
maybe they are different,
00:18:04.55\00:18:05.88
maybe they truly are sorrowful
for what they have done to me.
00:18:05.91\00:18:09.18
And he breaks away,
he weeps, he comes back.
00:18:09.22\00:18:11.35
But yet, he's
still a little skeptical,
00:18:11.39\00:18:13.59
because he's
thinking to himself,
00:18:13.62\00:18:14.96
he's remembering
all those things.
00:18:14.99\00:18:16.32
I mean, these are
the same brothers,
00:18:16.36\00:18:17.69
a couple of them who
deceived an entire city,
00:18:17.73\00:18:19.86
remember, with the
whole situation with Dinah,
00:18:19.89\00:18:21.86
and also, you know,
00:18:21.90\00:18:23.23
all these years, they
have lied to their father.
00:18:23.26\00:18:25.10
So he's still a
little skeptical,
00:18:25.13\00:18:26.87
but he continues on.
00:18:26.90\00:18:28.24
And at this point, we know that,
00:18:28.27\00:18:29.70
you know, at this point,
00:18:29.74\00:18:31.07
Joseph feel sorry for
them, and for their suffering,
00:18:31.11\00:18:33.17
and he weeps for
them at this point.
00:18:33.21\00:18:34.54
I can just see the
heart of Christ in Joseph,
00:18:34.58\00:18:36.71
Joseph is one of those
that we can most definitely say,
00:18:36.75\00:18:39.21
is a type of Christ,
00:18:39.25\00:18:40.85
for Jesus wept for His people.
00:18:40.88\00:18:42.88
And I could just
imagine, as he was weeping,
00:18:42.92\00:18:44.75
he sorrows for the fact
that he knows they're hurting.
00:18:44.79\00:18:47.26
And he knows that the decision
they made many years before
00:18:47.29\00:18:50.16
has affected them
deeply as it did him.
00:18:50.19\00:18:52.59
And so now that he's
given them instruction,
00:18:52.63\00:18:54.43
they've returned.
00:18:54.46\00:18:55.80
And they, you know,
make a long story short,
00:18:55.83\00:18:57.90
they now have made
the dealings with Jacob
00:18:57.93\00:19:00.44
to bring Benjamin back.
00:19:00.47\00:19:02.30
Now they've returned to Egypt.
00:19:02.34\00:19:04.11
And this is where we're
gonna pick up now on the story,
00:19:04.14\00:19:06.24
where, you know, they,
they're now Joseph invites them
00:19:06.27\00:19:08.64
to call all come
together and eat with them.
00:19:08.68\00:19:10.58
So they're all
having lunch together.
00:19:10.61\00:19:12.31
And they're
sitting around this table.
00:19:12.35\00:19:13.68
And so Joseph continues to test.
00:19:13.72\00:19:15.12
Are they really
different? Well, let's see.
00:19:15.15\00:19:16.58
Because he remembers
00:19:16.62\00:19:17.95
when I was
there, they picked on me
00:19:17.99\00:19:19.79
because I was father's favorite.
00:19:19.82\00:19:21.82
Do they do that to Benjamin?
00:19:21.86\00:19:23.19
I wonder if they treat Benjamin
the way that they treated me.
00:19:23.22\00:19:25.26
So he sets them
all around the table,
00:19:25.29\00:19:27.20
and he provides food with them.
00:19:27.23\00:19:28.80
But notice what
Genesis 43:34 says, it says,
00:19:28.83\00:19:32.33
"Then he took servings
to them from before him,
00:19:32.37\00:19:35.84
but Benjamin
serving was five times
00:19:35.87\00:19:38.61
as much as any of theirs.
00:19:38.64\00:19:40.41
So they drink and
were merry with him."
00:19:40.44\00:19:43.01
So it was almost
like a little test.
00:19:43.04\00:19:44.38
I wonder how
they're gonna react to this.
00:19:44.41\00:19:45.75
Are they gonna have
that same jealous spirit
00:19:45.78\00:19:47.45
that they had towards me,
00:19:47.48\00:19:48.88
you know, when I was younger?
00:19:48.92\00:19:50.25
Are they gonna treat
Benjamin the same way?
00:19:50.29\00:19:51.75
But he noticed that they didn't.
00:19:51.79\00:19:53.62
They didn't treat
Benjamin the same way.
00:19:53.66\00:19:55.22
They were merry as
the scripture says,
00:19:55.26\00:19:56.86
and happy with him,
00:19:56.89\00:19:58.23
but yet there's
still one last test
00:19:58.26\00:20:00.03
that Joseph is gonna
place upon this situation.
00:20:00.06\00:20:02.50
He wants to give
them one last test.
00:20:02.53\00:20:04.03
And we know this is
where the silver cup comes in.
00:20:04.07\00:20:07.57
Because now he's
gonna send them back
00:20:07.60\00:20:09.24
as if that he's
gonna send them back
00:20:09.27\00:20:10.81
with all this food.
00:20:10.84\00:20:12.17
And he places
00:20:12.21\00:20:13.54
or has a certain
place a silver cup
00:20:13.58\00:20:15.34
in Benjamin's food sack,
00:20:15.38\00:20:17.95
and he returns
all of their money
00:20:17.98\00:20:19.31
puts each of their monies
in the sack with the food.
00:20:19.35\00:20:21.25
And he sends them
off as if they're happy,
00:20:21.28\00:20:22.92
they're merry,
they're gonna go back
00:20:22.95\00:20:24.29
and they're gonna
feed their family.
00:20:24.32\00:20:25.65
He led some
getaways down the road.
00:20:25.69\00:20:27.02
And then he stops them
and accuses them of thievery.
00:20:27.06\00:20:30.06
Someone stole from
my house gold or silver.
00:20:30.09\00:20:32.46
And so they come back
and now they recognize
00:20:32.49\00:20:35.16
that something's not right.
00:20:35.20\00:20:36.53
They're pleading for their life.
00:20:36.56\00:20:38.13
They cut the bags open.
00:20:38.17\00:20:39.50
Joseph had this setup
all through the story.
00:20:39.53\00:20:42.07
And obviously we see
there that the silver cup was in
00:20:42.10\00:20:45.51
none other than
Benjamin's, Benjamin sack.
00:20:45.54\00:20:48.21
So now what's interesting
that takes place here is that
00:20:48.24\00:20:53.01
through all of this,
Joseph test them to basically,
00:20:53.05\00:20:56.02
he threatens to make
Benjamin his slave and his,
00:20:56.05\00:20:59.35
you know, as slaves in his house
00:20:59.39\00:21:00.86
and to keep him.
00:21:00.89\00:21:02.22
And this is where the
ultimate test comes in.
00:21:02.26\00:21:04.16
Because they could have been
just like they did with Joseph,
00:21:04.19\00:21:06.33
oh, you know,
horrible situation.
00:21:06.36\00:21:08.50
You know, let him
be and then go on,
00:21:08.53\00:21:10.40
because that's what they
would have done to Joseph.
00:21:10.43\00:21:12.13
But in this situation,
powerful moment happens.
00:21:12.17\00:21:14.94
His brother Judah,
who was one of those
00:21:14.97\00:21:16.81
who were just as much
wanted to see Joseph dead,
00:21:16.84\00:21:19.41
who was very much responsible
for throwing Joseph in that pit
00:21:19.44\00:21:22.54
and selling him off
to those Ishmaelites.
00:21:22.58\00:21:25.15
We see here that
Judah intercedes,
00:21:25.18\00:21:26.88
and he throws himself
at the feet of Joseph,
00:21:26.92\00:21:29.22
and he pleads for basically
00:21:29.25\00:21:31.99
Joseph to take
himself in place of Benjamin.
00:21:32.02\00:21:35.22
He sees the
heart, he sees the love,
00:21:35.26\00:21:37.79
he sees that,
that pleading spirit,
00:21:37.83\00:21:41.06
that loving spirit to say,
00:21:41.10\00:21:42.43
look, we can't dare
break our father's heart again.
00:21:42.46\00:21:45.33
This happened a second time
00:21:45.37\00:21:46.70
as we mistreated
our first brother.
00:21:46.74\00:21:48.40
Now this one it
would kill our father,
00:21:48.44\00:21:50.14
please take me in his place.
00:21:50.17\00:21:51.77
And it breaks Joseph
00:21:51.81\00:21:53.27
because Joseph finally sees
00:21:53.31\00:21:54.94
these are not the same
brothers that left me to die
00:21:54.98\00:21:58.15
or sold me off, you
know, a few years back.
00:21:58.18\00:22:00.55
In fact, I love the
first couple of verses
00:22:00.58\00:22:02.55
in Genesis Chapter 45.
00:22:02.58\00:22:04.19
Notice what it says
here of Genesis 45:1-2,
00:22:04.22\00:22:07.09
it says "The Joseph
could not restrain himself
00:22:07.12\00:22:09.76
before all those
who stood by him,
00:22:09.79\00:22:11.73
and he cried out, make
everyone go out for me.
00:22:11.76\00:22:15.86
So no one stood with him
00:22:15.90\00:22:17.27
while Joseph made
himself known to his brothers,
00:22:17.30\00:22:19.93
and he wept aloud
00:22:19.97\00:22:22.14
and the Egyptians
00:22:22.17\00:22:23.51
and the house of
Pharaoh heard it."
00:22:23.54\00:22:25.14
You could just
imagine the wailing,
00:22:25.17\00:22:26.98
you know, that
just the heartbreak
00:22:27.01\00:22:29.64
but at the same time,
00:22:29.68\00:22:31.01
just the love
pouring out from him
00:22:31.05\00:22:32.38
as he's so happy
that his brothers have,
00:22:32.41\00:22:35.72
they're different,
they've been changed
00:22:35.75\00:22:37.29
through this whole experience,
00:22:37.32\00:22:38.72
so much that I love
these last few verses here.
00:22:38.75\00:22:40.99
I'm gonna read for
this for my segment here.
00:22:41.02\00:22:43.32
This comes from Genesis 45:5-8.
00:22:43.36\00:22:46.13
Notice the emphasis
00:22:46.16\00:22:47.50
that Joseph places
in this whole situation.
00:22:47.53\00:22:49.76
He could have been
like, Oh, you know what?
00:22:49.80\00:22:51.13
You guys should have felt bad.
00:22:51.17\00:22:52.50
And you should feel
bad about your situation,
00:22:52.53\00:22:54.64
because of what
you've done to me,
00:22:54.67\00:22:56.00
but I've forgiven you.
00:22:56.04\00:22:57.61
You know, he kind of could
have dramatized it like that.
00:22:57.64\00:23:00.01
But notice the emphasis
he puts on the situation.
00:23:00.04\00:23:02.88
He places it on God,
for a good reason here.
00:23:02.91\00:23:05.71
Notice what he says,
00:23:05.75\00:23:07.08
verse 5 of Genesis 45,
00:23:07.12\00:23:09.05
"But now do not therefore,"
00:23:09.08\00:23:10.65
this is our, I think
this is our memory text.
00:23:10.69\00:23:13.02
"But now do not
therefore be grieved
00:23:13.05\00:23:14.62
or angry with yourself,
00:23:14.66\00:23:15.99
because you sold me here,
00:23:16.02\00:23:17.36
for God sent me
before you to preserve life."
00:23:17.39\00:23:21.20
Notice how he's
giving God the glory,
00:23:21.23\00:23:22.96
what Satan meant for bad
he says God turned into good.
00:23:23.00\00:23:26.23
And notice how
all this forgiveness
00:23:26.27\00:23:27.67
is bringing back a unification,
00:23:27.70\00:23:29.60
and it's coming
back to the glory of God.
00:23:29.64\00:23:31.47
Verse 6, he says,
00:23:31.51\00:23:32.84
"For these two years,
00:23:32.87\00:23:34.21
the famine has been in the land.
00:23:34.24\00:23:35.58
And there are still five
years in which there will be
00:23:35.61\00:23:36.95
neither plowing nor harvesting.
00:23:36.98\00:23:38.95
And God sent me,"
there it is again.
00:23:38.98\00:23:40.78
"And God sent me before you
00:23:40.82\00:23:42.52
to preserve
prosperity for you in the earth
00:23:42.55\00:23:46.39
and to save your lives
by a great deliverance.
00:23:46.42\00:23:48.72
So now it was, it was
not you who sent me here,
00:23:48.76\00:23:52.59
but God, notice,
00:23:52.63\00:23:53.96
but God and He has
made me a father to Pharaoh,
00:23:54.00\00:23:57.13
and lord of all his house,
00:23:57.17\00:23:58.50
and a ruler throughout
all the land of Egypt."
00:23:58.53\00:24:01.37
I think through this
what we ultimately can learn
00:24:01.40\00:24:03.64
in these closing moments I have,
00:24:03.67\00:24:05.01
I just want to
emphasize the fact
00:24:05.04\00:24:06.41
that Joseph could
have held a grudge
00:24:06.44\00:24:08.28
and that's exactly
what the spirit of the enemy
00:24:08.31\00:24:09.94
would have done.
00:24:09.98\00:24:11.31
But through it all,
00:24:11.35\00:24:12.68
because he was led
by the Spirit of God,
00:24:12.71\00:24:14.18
this brother kept
the commandments of God
00:24:14.22\00:24:16.15
and he had the
testimony of Jesus Christ.
00:24:16.18\00:24:18.32
And because of that he
was led by the Spirit of God
00:24:18.35\00:24:20.66
and God led him
00:24:20.69\00:24:22.02
to ultimately
forgive his brothers
00:24:22.06\00:24:23.73
who have done him wrong.
00:24:23.76\00:24:25.09
And he brought
them back together
00:24:25.13\00:24:26.46
just as God intends for us.
00:24:26.49\00:24:27.83
Amen.
00:24:27.86\00:24:29.20
Thank you so much, Pastor
Ryan, what an incredible story.
00:24:29.23\00:24:30.97
Don't go anywhere.
We'll be right back.
00:24:31.00\00:24:32.83
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Welcome back to our
study on the life of Joseph
00:25:09.70\00:25:11.87
as we look at forgiveness
00:25:11.91\00:25:13.38
and rest,
relationships and healing.
00:25:13.41\00:25:15.51
We're gonna kick
it over to Shelley
00:25:15.54\00:25:17.05
in Tuesday's lesson.
00:25:17.08\00:25:18.41
Oh, I love
Tuesday's lesson the title is,
00:25:18.45\00:25:22.58
"Forgive and forget"?
00:25:22.62\00:25:25.79
What is forgiveness?
00:25:25.82\00:25:27.86
When we forgive,
00:25:27.89\00:25:29.69
does forgiveness
justify the behavior of someone
00:25:29.72\00:25:33.83
who is seriously wrong?
00:25:33.86\00:25:35.20
Does, is forgiveness dependent
00:25:35.23\00:25:39.27
upon someone else's repentance?
00:25:39.30\00:25:42.60
One of the one with
whom I'm really upset,
00:25:42.64\00:25:47.34
just doesn't
deserve my forgiveness.
00:25:47.38\00:25:51.11
I believe that
Jesus on the cross
00:25:51.15\00:25:54.32
gave us an example
00:25:54.35\00:25:56.75
of divine forgiveness.
00:25:56.79\00:25:59.45
He was suffering
the most horrible,
00:25:59.49\00:26:03.53
humiliating death.
00:26:03.56\00:26:05.13
And yet, for
those who put Him there,
00:26:05.16\00:26:08.03
He could say,
00:26:08.06\00:26:09.40
"Father forgive them,
00:26:09.43\00:26:10.77
for they don't
know what they do."
00:26:10.80\00:26:12.73
Now, let's talk about
00:26:12.77\00:26:16.64
human to human forgiveness.
00:26:16.67\00:26:20.91
And the only way I can
describe forgiveness is
00:26:20.94\00:26:24.15
to describe
first what it is not.
00:26:24.18\00:26:29.25
You hear people say,
oh, forgive and forget.
00:26:29.28\00:26:32.32
You know, we can't
just blank out our memory.
00:26:32.35\00:26:35.19
Let's look at what
forgiveness is not.
00:26:35.22\00:26:38.13
Forgiveness is
not condoning the sin.
00:26:38.16\00:26:42.60
When you forgive someone,
00:26:42.63\00:26:43.97
you are not saying, "It's okay."
00:26:44.00\00:26:46.70
It doesn't justify their actions
00:26:46.74\00:26:49.87
or their behavior.
00:26:49.90\00:26:51.44
Forgiveness is not
forgetting what happened.
00:26:51.47\00:26:56.48
Because if we
forgot what happened,
00:26:56.51\00:26:59.05
would never
learn from experience.
00:26:59.08\00:27:01.82
Forgiveness is not a guarantee
00:27:01.85\00:27:06.25
that the other person
will change their behavior.
00:27:06.29\00:27:09.92
If the other
person is unrepentant,
00:27:09.96\00:27:13.19
if they are unchanged,
00:27:13.23\00:27:15.56
then it's up to us
00:27:15.60\00:27:17.40
to change the
rules of engagement.
00:27:17.43\00:27:20.14
We have to guard
ourselves from repeated injury.
00:27:20.17\00:27:25.97
I know my sister
had her first marriage
00:27:26.01\00:27:28.78
was an abusive relationship.
00:27:28.81\00:27:31.61
Her husband would continue
to ask for her forgiveness,
00:27:31.65\00:27:35.12
she'd forgive him.
00:27:35.15\00:27:37.05
But they never
went to counseling.
00:27:37.09\00:27:38.95
She never did anything about it.
00:27:38.99\00:27:40.32
And she was
abused over and over.
00:27:40.36\00:27:42.16
So I want to tell you,
00:27:42.19\00:27:43.59
if you're in an
abusive relationship,
00:27:43.63\00:27:46.56
remove yourself,
00:27:46.59\00:27:48.63
get some space from the abuser.
00:27:48.66\00:27:51.47
And you want to see
fruits of repentance,
00:27:51.50\00:27:54.24
even though you forgive them.
00:27:54.27\00:27:55.64
Look for fruits of
repentance before you return.
00:27:55.67\00:27:58.57
Forgiveness is not
naively restoring trust.
00:27:58.61\00:28:04.51
Trust has to be earned.
00:28:04.55\00:28:07.28
Reconciliation is
the goal of forgiveness,
00:28:07.32\00:28:13.19
but it cannot be assumed.
00:28:13.22\00:28:15.99
Forgiveness is
not necessarily easy.
00:28:16.02\00:28:19.23
It's an act that
requires I think God's strength.
00:28:19.26\00:28:24.80
It can be very difficult
00:28:24.83\00:28:28.24
to even forgive
the first defense
00:28:28.27\00:28:30.21
if it's bad enough,
00:28:30.24\00:28:31.57
but when someone
offends you repeatedly,
00:28:31.61\00:28:35.98
we have to have
God's strength to forgive.
00:28:36.01\00:28:40.85
So let's look at what relational
00:28:40.88\00:28:45.12
human to human forgiveness is.
00:28:45.15\00:28:49.46
It's an intentional act
00:28:49.49\00:28:52.09
by the one
who's been victimized.
00:28:52.13\00:28:54.53
Its releasing negative feelings,
00:28:54.56\00:28:58.13
releasing the hurts
00:28:58.17\00:28:59.50
and the emotions of anger, rage,
00:28:59.53\00:29:03.27
so that you don't
become embittered.
00:29:03.30\00:29:06.98
God's love is the source
of relational forgiveness.
00:29:07.01\00:29:12.95
He can help us see others
00:29:12.98\00:29:16.58
as the lost and
suffering souls they are.
00:29:16.62\00:29:19.32
And you may say,
00:29:19.35\00:29:20.69
"Well, it's
someone in the church
00:29:20.72\00:29:22.26
that is this person
that spreading gossip."
00:29:22.29\00:29:25.93
So how can you say
they're lost in suffering?
00:29:25.96\00:29:28.20
Let me tell you something,
00:29:28.23\00:29:29.93
just because
they're in the church,
00:29:29.96\00:29:31.30
doesn't mean they're saved.
00:29:31.33\00:29:34.04
You know, there's
the wheat and the tares.
00:29:34.07\00:29:37.31
It's true.
00:29:37.34\00:29:38.67
But God's love
can help us understand
00:29:38.71\00:29:43.55
that their offense against us
00:29:43.58\00:29:47.65
is a result of
their own sin nature.
00:29:47.68\00:29:51.35
So forgiveness is
the essence of our faith.
00:29:51.39\00:29:56.52
I mean, truly, this is a choice
00:29:56.56\00:30:00.30
we are commanded to make.
00:30:00.33\00:30:03.87
It's a process.
00:30:03.90\00:30:05.23
Right.
00:30:05.27\00:30:06.60
Joseph had a choice.
00:30:06.63\00:30:07.97
He could either
forgive his brothers
00:30:08.00\00:30:09.57
who sold him to slavery or not.
00:30:09.60\00:30:12.74
But even he offered
them a second chance
00:30:12.77\00:30:18.48
to restore the relationship.
00:30:18.51\00:30:20.28
He did not dwell on
past mistakes, did he?
00:30:20.32\00:30:23.99
For Christians, hear
what I'm going to say,
00:30:24.02\00:30:27.79
forgiveness is a
non-negotiable act of obedience.
00:30:27.82\00:30:32.93
It's good.
00:30:32.96\00:30:34.63
Matthew 18:21-22,
00:30:34.66\00:30:39.40
Peter comes to Jesus.
00:30:39.43\00:30:42.04
Matthew 18:21-22, he says,
00:30:42.07\00:30:45.57
"Lord, how often
should I forgive someone
00:30:45.61\00:30:47.58
who sinned against me?
00:30:47.61\00:30:48.94
Seven times?"
00:30:48.98\00:30:50.65
Well, it sounded
like to lot to him.
00:30:50.68\00:30:53.18
"Jesus said, 'No,
seventy times seven.'"
00:30:53.21\00:30:57.95
Yeah. Wow.
00:30:57.99\00:30:59.32
Four hundred and ninety
times that requires sin.
00:30:59.35\00:31:01.52
That's only by God's grace.
00:31:01.56\00:31:04.23
Relational forgiveness
is releasing the injustice
00:31:04.26\00:31:10.07
and treating someone as
if they have not wronged us.
00:31:10.10\00:31:13.07
It doesn't mean that
there won't be consequences.
00:31:13.10\00:31:15.64
Listen to what I'm saying.
00:31:15.67\00:31:18.37
The reason I keep emphasizing
00:31:18.41\00:31:21.18
relational forgiveness,
00:31:21.21\00:31:24.55
is it is not legal forgiveness.
00:31:24.58\00:31:29.98
When we forgive somebody,
00:31:30.02\00:31:31.65
that doesn't mean that
God has pardoned that sin.
00:31:31.69\00:31:35.16
They've still got to deal.
00:31:35.19\00:31:36.79
All sin is with God.
00:31:36.83\00:31:38.66
And they've still
got to deal with that
00:31:38.69\00:31:40.96
and get it straight with God.
00:31:41.00\00:31:42.93
But what we are
doing when we forgive,
00:31:42.96\00:31:47.24
is we're recognizing
00:31:47.27\00:31:49.54
that the consequences
of behavior toward God
00:31:49.57\00:31:52.77
belong to Him.
00:31:52.81\00:31:54.14
It's not that the
consequences are not up to us.
00:31:54.18\00:31:58.51
You're not
surrendering to a person
00:31:58.55\00:32:00.92
when you forgive them.
00:32:00.95\00:32:02.28
You're surrendering to God,
you're not doing them a favor.
00:32:02.32\00:32:06.15
As Jill said, unforgiveness,
00:32:06.19\00:32:11.19
when you forgive somebody,
you're doing yourself a favor.
00:32:11.23\00:32:13.80
Unforgiveness is
like drinking poison.
00:32:13.83\00:32:19.93
If I don't forgive Johnny,
it's like I drink poison,
00:32:19.97\00:32:23.71
and think it's
going to hurt him.
00:32:23.74\00:32:25.81
Well, that doesn't make a
whole lot of sense, does it?
00:32:25.84\00:32:28.54
Poison pollutes
our emotional life,
00:32:28.58\00:32:31.01
it pollutes our spiritual life.
00:32:31.05\00:32:34.25
Even the bitterness and the rage
00:32:34.28\00:32:38.49
and unforgiveness can,
00:32:38.52\00:32:40.86
it can touch our physical life,
00:32:40.89\00:32:43.22
it can cause us to be
inflamed and be stress,
00:32:43.26\00:32:46.59
it can contribute to depression.
00:32:46.63\00:32:50.13
You, when you are
holding on to unforgiveness,
00:32:50.17\00:32:54.47
you become frozen in time.
00:32:54.50\00:32:57.34
You're like in a time capsule,
and you remain a victim.
00:32:57.37\00:33:01.84
So when you forgive,
00:33:01.88\00:33:04.41
it's like you're giving that up.
00:33:04.45\00:33:06.55
Right. That's true.
00:33:06.58\00:33:07.92
In Matthew 18:23-35,
00:33:07.95\00:33:10.69
there's a parable of
an unforgiving slave,
00:33:10.72\00:33:13.05
and I'm just for sake of time
going to go through it quickly.
00:33:13.09\00:33:17.03
Jesus tells this parable.
00:33:17.06\00:33:18.43
Man comes before his
master, he has a huge debt,
00:33:18.46\00:33:22.60
he cannot pay this debt.
00:33:22.63\00:33:24.60
Without even
asking for forgiveness,
00:33:24.63\00:33:27.47
the master gave him forgiveness.
00:33:27.50\00:33:30.21
He says,
00:33:30.24\00:33:31.57
"Don't worry, we're
going to wipe your debt away."
00:33:31.61\00:33:34.41
The guy is excited.
00:33:34.44\00:33:36.11
Hallelujah. He goes out.
00:33:36.14\00:33:38.41
First person he
runs into is another man
00:33:38.45\00:33:42.75
who owes him little bitty debt.
00:33:42.78\00:33:46.15
And he will and
the guy is begging,
00:33:46.19\00:33:48.39
"Oh, please
forgive me. I'll pay it."
00:33:48.42\00:33:50.66
But he's going to throw
him into debtor's prison.
00:33:50.69\00:33:53.33
He will not
forgive him, guess what?
00:33:53.36\00:33:55.30
The master finds out about it.
00:33:55.33\00:33:57.90
And he says,
00:33:57.93\00:33:59.27
"Oh, really?
00:33:59.30\00:34:00.64
And I forgave
brother, so and so all that."
00:34:00.67\00:34:05.01
Guess what?
00:34:05.04\00:34:06.57
Grab him up, throw
him in debtors' prison.
00:34:06.61\00:34:09.94
See, Jesus then comes
back, and He tell us in 8,
00:34:09.98\00:34:15.28
Matthew 18:35,
00:34:15.32\00:34:16.69
"So My heavenly
Father will do to you
00:34:16.72\00:34:18.82
if each of you, from your heart,
00:34:18.85\00:34:23.06
does not forgive his
brother his trespasses."
00:34:23.09\00:34:26.33
Let me try to
tell you a quick story.
00:34:26.36\00:34:28.50
I asked God many years ago,
00:34:28.53\00:34:31.03
for an
illustration of forgiveness.
00:34:31.07\00:34:33.84
If you have a stream
00:34:33.87\00:34:35.74
that's coming
down from the mountains
00:34:35.77\00:34:37.81
through the valley,
00:34:37.84\00:34:39.17
you anchor a wire on
one side and on the other.
00:34:39.21\00:34:43.04
Guess what happens?
00:34:43.08\00:34:44.41
As trash comes down
that mountain stream,
00:34:44.45\00:34:47.88
it begins to
gather up around that wire
00:34:47.92\00:34:51.12
and like a beaver
00:34:51.15\00:34:52.49
would build a dam stick by stick
00:34:52.52\00:34:54.46
guess what?
00:34:54.49\00:34:55.82
That wire gets all jammed
up, the water no longer flows.
00:34:55.86\00:35:00.73
Unforgiveness in your
heart is like that little wire,
00:35:00.76\00:35:04.57
and things begin
to build around it.
00:35:04.60\00:35:07.07
And you know what happened?
00:35:07.10\00:35:08.70
It blocks up the
flow of the living water.
00:35:08.74\00:35:12.64
That's right.
00:35:12.67\00:35:14.01
Jesus tells us to forgive
00:35:14.04\00:35:16.08
because it's good for us.
00:35:16.11\00:35:18.55
Amen.
00:35:18.58\00:35:20.02
Praise the Lord.
00:35:20.05\00:35:21.38
We now move to Wednesday's part
00:35:21.42\00:35:22.82
and the title is
"Making It Practical".
00:35:22.85\00:35:25.72
You know, I want to
remind you that the lesson,
00:35:25.75\00:35:28.09
the whole quarter is
entitled "Rest in Christ".
00:35:28.12\00:35:30.76
And this is what
we're talking about here,
00:35:30.79\00:35:32.26
rest in Christ.
00:35:32.29\00:35:34.20
So, this lesson brings
out something important,
00:35:34.23\00:35:37.77
it has been mentioned already.
00:35:37.80\00:35:39.47
It says, in order to forgive,
00:35:39.50\00:35:41.50
I must admit
that I have been hurt.
00:35:41.54\00:35:44.07
And sometimes we
do hold things in,
00:35:44.11\00:35:47.24
we bottle it inside,
00:35:47.28\00:35:48.78
and we don't want to let it go.
00:35:48.81\00:35:50.31
And it can consume
us, it can be like poison,
00:35:50.35\00:35:53.62
as you have already heard.
00:35:53.65\00:35:55.18
Now, it's interesting
00:35:55.22\00:35:57.19
that we can look into the Psalms
00:35:57.22\00:35:58.85
and see that David was a person
00:35:58.89\00:36:01.42
that he expressed
his feelings to the Lord.
00:36:01.46\00:36:04.29
I mean, you can even picture him
00:36:04.33\00:36:06.19
crying out to the Lord.
00:36:06.23\00:36:07.70
And I want to bring out
to you one such occasion
00:36:07.73\00:36:10.87
in Psalm 13:1-2,
00:36:10.90\00:36:13.54
and I think a lot of us
00:36:13.57\00:36:15.20
can identify with this
00:36:15.24\00:36:16.67
because we have
had our request with
00:36:16.71\00:36:18.87
before the Lord we're
going through a situation.
00:36:18.91\00:36:21.18
And he begin, this
begins in Psalm 13:1-2."
00:36:21.21\00:36:24.21
How long, O Lord?
00:36:24.25\00:36:27.42
Will You forget me forever?
00:36:27.45\00:36:30.12
How long will You
hide Your face from me?
00:36:30.15\00:36:33.56
How long shall I
take counsel in my soul,
00:36:33.59\00:36:36.26
having sorrow in my heart daily?
00:36:36.29\00:36:38.96
How long will my
enemy be exalted over me?"
00:36:38.99\00:36:43.37
So it's healthy
00:36:43.40\00:36:44.93
to express our
feelings to the Lord.
00:36:44.97\00:36:47.30
And, of course,
like the Bible says,
00:36:47.34\00:36:50.97
be angry and sin not.
00:36:51.01\00:36:53.07
Because the Lord loves us,
He knows what is best for us.
00:36:53.11\00:36:57.28
But you can express,
00:36:57.31\00:36:58.65
Lord, this is consuming,
this is difficult for me.
00:36:58.68\00:37:01.48
But we should
not weary ourselves
00:37:01.52\00:37:04.22
out of the hands of the Lord.
00:37:04.25\00:37:05.59
We should trust in the Lord,
00:37:05.62\00:37:06.96
because as you
continue reading in Psalm 13,
00:37:06.99\00:37:09.12
in any of the psalms
00:37:09.16\00:37:10.56
where David he's
expressing his sufferings,
00:37:10.59\00:37:14.93
it turns into a positive note,
00:37:14.96\00:37:16.83
but I will
praise the Lord forever,
00:37:16.87\00:37:19.33
I will rejoice in my God always.
00:37:19.37\00:37:21.47
So take these as an example.
00:37:21.50\00:37:24.44
But I want to talk for
a little bit about anger,
00:37:24.47\00:37:26.98
because Joseph could have,
00:37:27.01\00:37:29.24
he could have hold,
held on to his anger.
00:37:29.28\00:37:31.75
I mean, his brothers,
they tried to kill him.
00:37:31.78\00:37:34.88
I mean, who
wouldn't be upset about that?
00:37:34.92\00:37:36.72
He had no idea what
would happen to him,
00:37:36.75\00:37:39.22
but he placed himself
in the hands of the Lord.
00:37:39.25\00:37:41.19
Amen.
00:37:41.22\00:37:42.56
And you can see
that he was a person
00:37:42.59\00:37:44.06
developed into a man
that trusted in the Lord
00:37:44.09\00:37:46.59
no matter what the situation
00:37:46.63\00:37:48.83
and chose to be faithful
00:37:48.86\00:37:50.30
amidst difficult
times, difficult situations.
00:37:50.33\00:37:53.84
But I want to
talk to you about anger
00:37:53.87\00:37:55.57
because it does
cause great harm.
00:37:55.60\00:37:58.81
Instead of forgiving
and you hold on to anger,
00:37:58.84\00:38:01.38
it can consume you.
00:38:01.41\00:38:03.24
And I want to bring
something out that is,
00:38:03.28\00:38:06.28
you can go to
psychologytoday.com
00:38:06.31\00:38:08.15
and see an
article there about anger.
00:38:08.18\00:38:10.95
And it says that
00:38:10.99\00:38:12.32
anger is far more your
enemy than your friend.
00:38:12.35\00:38:15.56
It harms your relationships,
both professional and personal.
00:38:15.59\00:38:19.69
And it has been repeatedly shown
00:38:19.73\00:38:22.70
to damage your health
and shorten your life.
00:38:22.73\00:38:27.40
There's a book
written by Redford Williams,
00:38:27.44\00:38:31.17
he wrote a book
called, "Anger Kills" 1993.
00:38:31.21\00:38:35.81
And he revealed some
studies that have been done
00:38:35.84\00:38:39.11
about what anger
does to us as humans.
00:38:39.15\00:38:44.32
And I want to
point out three things
00:38:44.35\00:38:46.79
that is also brought
out in another magazine,
00:38:46.82\00:38:48.76
another website,
everydayhealth.com
00:38:48.79\00:38:50.93
Notice, an angry outburst
puts your heart at great risk.
00:38:50.96\00:38:56.77
In two hours
after an angry outburst,
00:38:56.80\00:38:59.00
the chance of having
a heart attack doubles.
00:38:59.03\00:39:02.54
Wow. Oh, wow.
00:39:02.57\00:39:04.01
For two hours.
00:39:04.04\00:39:05.37
This was the
statement by Dr. Chris Aiken,
00:39:05.41\00:39:09.08
who is an instructor
in Clinical Psychiatry
00:39:09.11\00:39:12.05
at Wake Forest
University School of Medicine.
00:39:12.08\00:39:15.45
Repressed anger.
00:39:15.48\00:39:16.82
Have you ever
heard of repressed anger?
00:39:16.85\00:39:18.49
You're holding on to this anger,
00:39:18.52\00:39:20.19
I'm going to wait,
00:39:20.22\00:39:21.56
and the devil takes
advantage of these things.
00:39:21.59\00:39:24.16
Now, there are
some people that say,
00:39:24.19\00:39:26.36
"Oh, I'm from such
and such a country,
00:39:26.39\00:39:27.73
it's in my nature."
00:39:27.76\00:39:29.80
And when you
have that mentality,
00:39:29.83\00:39:32.07
the devil says,
I've got this person,
00:39:32.10\00:39:34.24
I can just, you know,
some people are quick tempered.
00:39:34.27\00:39:37.01
Very, very dangerous.
00:39:37.04\00:39:38.37
Now, what happened so to say,
00:39:38.41\00:39:40.54
one study found that
people with anger proneness,
00:39:40.58\00:39:44.45
as a personality trait,
00:39:44.48\00:39:46.31
were at twice the
risk of coronary disease
00:39:46.35\00:39:50.35
than their less angry peers.
00:39:50.39\00:39:53.46
So we got to let
go of this anger.
00:39:53.49\00:39:55.32
We've got to deal with
it in a constructive way,
00:39:55.36\00:39:58.63
not in a destructive way.
00:39:58.66\00:40:01.43
And according to
everydayhealth.com
00:40:01.46\00:40:03.53
constructive anger is the kind
00:40:03.57\00:40:05.40
where you speak up
directly to the person
00:40:05.43\00:40:07.64
that you're angry with,
00:40:07.67\00:40:09.00
and deal with the frustration
in a problem-solving manner,
00:40:09.04\00:40:14.34
not in a, I'm
going to get even to you.
00:40:14.38\00:40:16.85
I'm going to give
you a piece of my mind,
00:40:16.88\00:40:19.35
I don't know if
you've ever said,
00:40:19.38\00:40:20.72
I'm going to give
him a piece of my mind.
00:40:20.75\00:40:22.92
I don't know how much
mind you've got to give.
00:40:22.95\00:40:24.62
But it's very dangerous
to be doing those things
00:40:24.65\00:40:27.46
because the
devil, when you're angry,
00:40:27.49\00:40:29.72
and you don't place yourself
in the hands of the Lord,
00:40:29.76\00:40:31.76
the devil can try to bring you
to the point of committing sin,
00:40:31.79\00:40:35.43
or causing harm, either
verbally, or physically,
00:40:35.46\00:40:39.77
emotionally as
well to an individual.
00:40:39.80\00:40:42.97
And these
people that have these,
00:40:43.00\00:40:47.18
the people that do
express their anger
00:40:47.21\00:40:49.44
in a constructive manner,
00:40:49.48\00:40:50.95
the article says,
00:40:50.98\00:40:53.01
is not associated
with heart disease,
00:40:53.05\00:40:55.72
and it's actually very
normal, healthy emotion.
00:40:55.75\00:40:58.65
So they have done
studies on the people
00:40:58.69\00:41:01.26
that do the destructive anger
00:41:01.29\00:41:03.93
and the people that
do the constructive anger
00:41:03.96\00:41:05.93
and deal with the problem.
00:41:05.96\00:41:07.60
The Bible brings
out in Hebrews Chapter,
00:41:07.63\00:41:09.80
no, Ephesians, Ephesians 4:26,
00:41:09.83\00:41:12.77
and I'm going to read verse 27.
00:41:12.80\00:41:14.97
"Be angry, and do not sin.
00:41:15.00\00:41:17.37
Do not let the sun
go down on your wrath."
00:41:17.41\00:41:21.74
So this is what
the Bible tells us,
00:41:21.78\00:41:23.91
and this is verse 27,
00:41:23.95\00:41:25.28
"Nor give place to the devil."
00:41:25.31\00:41:27.12
So when you're
angry, be very careful.
00:41:27.15\00:41:29.85
Bring that anger to the
Lord and say, "Lord, I'm angry,"
00:41:29.88\00:41:33.22
express it,
00:41:33.25\00:41:34.59
"Lord, I'm angry,
00:41:34.62\00:41:35.96
help me to deal
with this anger."
00:41:35.99\00:41:38.13
Because if you don't,
00:41:38.16\00:41:40.06
you're giving place to the devil
00:41:40.10\00:41:41.56
and it can become
very, very dangerous for you.
00:41:41.60\00:41:43.53
That's right.
00:41:43.57\00:41:44.90
And so, another point is
00:41:44.93\00:41:47.50
anger ups your stroke risk.
00:41:47.54\00:41:50.81
One study found
there was a three times
00:41:50.84\00:41:53.14
higher risk of having a
stroke from a blood clot
00:41:53.17\00:41:56.28
due to the brain
00:41:56.31\00:41:57.65
or bleeding within the brain
00:41:57.68\00:41:59.08
during two hours
after an angry outburst.
00:41:59.11\00:42:01.58
So they, there are these
terrible, terrible dangers
00:42:01.62\00:42:04.89
that we have to look at.
00:42:04.92\00:42:06.25
And number three,
00:42:06.29\00:42:07.62
it weakens your immune system.
00:42:07.66\00:42:11.93
One study at Harvard
University scientists found that
00:42:11.96\00:42:14.73
in healthy people
00:42:14.76\00:42:16.10
simply recalling
an angry experience
00:42:16.13\00:42:19.40
from their past
00:42:19.43\00:42:20.80
caused a six-hour dip in levels
of the antibody immunoglobulin,
00:42:20.84\00:42:27.71
immunoglobulin A, the cell,
00:42:27.74\00:42:30.25
the cells first line of
defense against infection.
00:42:30.28\00:42:32.45
So it affects your health
in so many different ways,
00:42:32.48\00:42:36.18
and affects your attitude,
and it affects your well-being,
00:42:36.22\00:42:39.49
so we can learn from Jesus
00:42:39.52\00:42:42.59
as it has already been said,
00:42:42.62\00:42:44.59
Luke 23:34,
00:42:44.63\00:42:46.86
"Then Jesus said,
00:42:46.90\00:42:48.30
'Father, forgive them,
00:42:48.33\00:42:50.57
for they do not
know what they do.'"
00:42:50.60\00:42:53.97
So let us learn from Jesus
00:42:54.00\00:42:56.67
because He is our great example.
00:42:56.71\00:42:59.44
Forgive.
00:42:59.47\00:43:00.81
Forgive and it
will be better for us.
00:43:00.84\00:43:04.21
Romans 5:8,
00:43:04.25\00:43:05.58
"But God demonstrates
His own love toward us
00:43:05.61\00:43:08.28
in that while we
were still sinners,
00:43:08.32\00:43:10.65
Christ died for us."
00:43:10.69\00:43:12.55
God is so merciful, so kind.
00:43:12.59\00:43:15.12
And I want to
take you to a statement
00:43:15.16\00:43:19.59
that I found that has
been a blessing to me.
00:43:19.63\00:43:22.96
It's in Review and
Herald, December 16, 1884.
00:43:23.00\00:43:26.27
If you need a copy of
this, you're welcome to write.
00:43:26.30\00:43:29.00
Notice this.
00:43:29.04\00:43:30.71
"If there have been difficulties
00:43:30.74\00:43:32.37
between brethren and sisters,
00:43:32.41\00:43:34.24
if envy, malice, bitterness,
00:43:34.28\00:43:36.34
evil surmising have existed,
00:43:36.38\00:43:38.51
confess these sins
not in a general way,
00:43:38.55\00:43:41.95
but go to your
brethren and sisters personally,
00:43:41.98\00:43:45.25
be definite.
00:43:45.29\00:43:46.89
If you have committed
one wrong and they 20,
00:43:46.92\00:43:50.06
confess that one as though
you were the chief offender,
00:43:50.09\00:43:54.63
take them by the
hand, let your heart soften
00:43:54.66\00:43:57.60
under the influence of
the Spirit of God and say,
00:43:57.63\00:44:01.04
'Will you forgive me?
00:44:01.07\00:44:03.04
I have not felt right overdue.
00:44:03.07\00:44:05.37
I want to make right every wrong
00:44:05.41\00:44:08.74
that not may stand
registered against me
00:44:08.78\00:44:12.05
in the books of heaven.
00:44:12.08\00:44:13.42
I must have a clean record.
00:44:13.45\00:44:15.92
Who, think you,"
00:44:15.95\00:44:17.29
it says here
00:44:17.32\00:44:18.65
"would withstand
such a movement as this.
00:44:18.69\00:44:22.42
There's too much
coldness and indifference,
00:44:22.46\00:44:24.43
too much of the
I don't care spirit
00:44:24.46\00:44:26.66
exercised among
professed followers of Christ.
00:44:26.70\00:44:29.93
All should feel a
care for one another,
00:44:29.96\00:44:33.94
jealously guarding
each other's interests,
00:44:33.97\00:44:36.97
love one another,
00:44:37.01\00:44:38.37
then we should
stand a strong wall
00:44:38.41\00:44:41.81
against Satan's devices.'"
00:44:41.84\00:44:44.31
So this is a powerful statement
00:44:44.35\00:44:46.18
again Review and
Herald, December 16, 1884.
00:44:46.21\00:44:49.78
Forgive, forgive.
00:44:49.82\00:44:52.25
It is difficult to do sometimes.
00:44:52.29\00:44:54.82
Sometimes we have been so hurt.
00:44:54.86\00:44:57.13
It's like a knife has
been driven into our heart,
00:44:57.16\00:45:01.03
but by the grace of
God coming to the Lord,
00:45:01.06\00:45:03.90
asking Him teach me to
forgive, as you forgive me.
00:45:03.93\00:45:07.97
Thank you so much.
00:45:08.00\00:45:09.34
That's great medical advice
00:45:09.37\00:45:11.07
about how
unforgiveness affects us
00:45:11.11\00:45:13.48
physically, mentally.
00:45:13.51\00:45:15.24
Now I want to, I want to go
on a little different direction,
00:45:15.28\00:45:17.15
because a lot of times
when you hear the word abuse,
00:45:17.18\00:45:19.41
we naturally think a
woman is being abused.
00:45:19.45\00:45:23.05
But there are no women
being abused in the story.
00:45:23.08\00:45:25.25
It's Joseph and his brothers.
00:45:25.29\00:45:26.76
Yeah, that's right.
00:45:26.79\00:45:28.12
And 85% of abuse
does take place on women,
00:45:28.16\00:45:30.83
but 15% of abuse happens to men.
00:45:30.86\00:45:34.56
And in this story, it's
Joseph and his brothers,
00:45:34.60\00:45:37.53
and there are
various types of abuse.
00:45:37.57\00:45:39.83
Naturally, when we
hear the word abuse,
00:45:39.87\00:45:41.20
we think right
away physical abuse,
00:45:41.24\00:45:42.57
that's the most common,
00:45:42.60\00:45:43.94
but there's sexual abuse,
00:45:43.97\00:45:45.31
there's the verbal
that impacts us emotionally.
00:45:45.34\00:45:48.54
There's the mental abuse
00:45:48.58\00:45:49.91
that impacts us psychologically,
00:45:49.94\00:45:51.28
you talked about that.
00:45:51.31\00:45:52.68
And there's the financial abuse
that affects us economically.
00:45:52.71\00:45:56.52
And there's the cultural
abuse that affects our identity.
00:45:56.55\00:46:00.32
A lot of young
boys have grown up.
00:46:00.36\00:46:02.89
And I'm going to
say this in reality,
00:46:02.92\00:46:04.39
have grown up without
a proper image of a man,
00:46:04.43\00:46:07.16
and have been in an
abusive environment.
00:46:07.20\00:46:08.90
And they turn and they grew
up not knowing how to be a man.
00:46:08.93\00:46:11.83
And in some of those
cases, this is not the default.
00:46:11.87\00:46:14.57
But in some of those cases,
00:46:14.60\00:46:15.94
they end up
choosing a gay lifestyle.
00:46:15.97\00:46:17.94
But in many of those cases,
00:46:17.97\00:46:19.37
which we've known
amongst some of the people
00:46:19.41\00:46:20.74
that have talked about
00:46:20.78\00:46:22.11
how God has
freed them from that,
00:46:22.14\00:46:23.81
they had to establish
00:46:23.85\00:46:25.18
a proper image
of the forgiveness,
00:46:25.21\00:46:28.62
and the restoration,
00:46:28.65\00:46:30.19
and God correcting their view
00:46:30.22\00:46:32.25
of what it means to be
forgiven and to be restored.
00:46:32.29\00:46:35.26
So we're not just talking about
forgiveness in the sense of,
00:46:35.29\00:46:38.23
well, that's going to be
the end all that end all.
00:46:38.26\00:46:40.80
But I did, and remember,
we did a two-hour live,
00:46:40.83\00:46:43.87
Jill and Greg, my wife
and I did a two hour live
00:46:43.90\00:46:47.50
called More
Powerful than Forgiveness.
00:46:47.54\00:46:49.70
And I would recommend you
check that out on YouTube.
00:46:49.74\00:46:52.07
I don't often
make plugs like that.
00:46:52.11\00:46:53.88
But there is something that is
more powerful than forgiveness.
00:46:53.91\00:46:56.54
And I want to
talk about that today.
00:46:56.58\00:46:58.51
But there's some observations
00:46:58.55\00:46:59.88
and I'm going to first talk
about the steps of forgiveness,
00:46:59.91\00:47:02.45
because
forgiveness done correctly
00:47:02.48\00:47:05.25
causes you to
grow at every step.
00:47:05.29\00:47:09.62
But forgiveness is not something
00:47:09.66\00:47:10.99
that you run to do right away
on the heels of the offense.
00:47:11.03\00:47:14.56
But as Pastor
John Dinzey just said,
00:47:14.60\00:47:17.20
the longer you delay
the process of forgiveness,
00:47:17.23\00:47:20.44
the longer you
victimize yourself also,
00:47:20.47\00:47:24.31
because as
Shelley and Jill said,
00:47:24.34\00:47:26.91
it's like taking poison,
00:47:26.94\00:47:28.64
in that illustration
is clearly pointed out.
00:47:28.68\00:47:31.45
I called lack of forgiveness,
like dragging around trash,
00:47:31.48\00:47:36.38
I call it a trailer trash.
00:47:36.42\00:47:38.42
Our lives are filled with
trash and a lot of that trash
00:47:38.45\00:47:41.16
is we have not
resolved the issues of our past
00:47:41.19\00:47:43.79
in the area of forgiveness.
00:47:43.83\00:47:46.36
First step in forgiveness,
personal confession.
00:47:46.39\00:47:51.00
Admit your guilt,
00:47:51.03\00:47:52.43
and your part in
the transgression.
00:47:52.47\00:47:54.77
1 John 1:9,
00:47:54.80\00:47:56.14
"If we confess our sins,
00:47:56.17\00:47:57.67
He is faithful and
just to forgive us our sins
00:47:57.71\00:48:00.11
and to cleanse us
from all unrighteousness."
00:48:00.14\00:48:02.44
That's a
forgiveness that's not between
00:48:02.48\00:48:04.51
you and another person.
00:48:04.55\00:48:05.88
But something you have done
00:48:05.91\00:48:07.25
that directly affects
your relationship with God.
00:48:07.28\00:48:09.68
Because if I've
offended someone, I can't say,
00:48:09.72\00:48:11.92
"Father, forgive me,
00:48:11.95\00:48:13.29
but I'm not going to
say anything to them."
00:48:13.32\00:48:14.79
That
relationship is still broken.
00:48:14.82\00:48:16.16
Right.
00:48:16.19\00:48:17.53
Which comes to the second type
00:48:17.56\00:48:18.89
of the second
aspect of forgiveness,
00:48:18.93\00:48:20.43
personal repentance.
00:48:20.46\00:48:22.13
Acts 3:19,
00:48:22.16\00:48:23.50
"Repent
therefore, and be converted,
00:48:23.53\00:48:25.30
that your sins
may be blotted out.
00:48:25.33\00:48:27.90
So that times of
refreshing may come
00:48:27.94\00:48:30.57
from the presence of the Lord."
00:48:30.61\00:48:32.31
Some people have
never known refreshing
00:48:32.34\00:48:34.58
until they have followed
the steps of forgiveness,
00:48:34.61\00:48:38.38
a burden lifted.
00:48:38.41\00:48:40.42
Man, it looks different today.
00:48:40.45\00:48:42.22
Wow, last night was tough.
00:48:42.25\00:48:43.59
But I feel so much better today.
00:48:43.62\00:48:45.19
I can now move on.
00:48:45.22\00:48:47.12
And so many you
have never had that
00:48:47.16\00:48:49.22
refreshing from the
presence of the Lord.
00:48:49.26\00:48:51.69
That doesn't
mean when Jesus comes
00:48:51.73\00:48:53.19
that mean He can do that now.
00:48:53.23\00:48:55.20
The third one,
forgive each other.
00:48:55.23\00:48:57.10
Colossians 3:13,
00:48:57.13\00:48:59.03
"Bearing with one another
and forgiving one another.
00:48:59.07\00:49:02.57
If anyone has a
complaint against another,
00:49:02.60\00:49:06.51
even as Christ forgave
you, so you also must do."
00:49:06.54\00:49:11.05
That's a Christian obligation.
00:49:11.08\00:49:13.11
And there's a
second part of that
00:49:13.15\00:49:15.28
in the forgiving each other.
00:49:15.32\00:49:16.65
Ephesians 4:32.
00:49:16.69\00:49:19.05
"And be kind to one
another, tender-hearted,
00:49:19.09\00:49:22.82
forgiving one another
00:49:22.86\00:49:24.59
even as God in
Christ forgave you."
00:49:24.63\00:49:28.26
Now, this requires
the right attitude.
00:49:28.30\00:49:31.50
You can't go to
somebody and say,
00:49:31.53\00:49:33.57
"I forgive you.
00:49:33.60\00:49:35.47
You don't forgive me
when you're going to do it?
00:49:35.50\00:49:37.21
Hurry up."
00:49:37.24\00:49:38.57
I mean, I'm just
over exaggerating,
00:49:38.61\00:49:40.04
but forgiveness is
not something demanded
00:49:40.08\00:49:42.44
until the heart is transformed,
it is an act of futility,
00:49:42.48\00:49:46.82
because intellectual forgiveness
00:49:46.85\00:49:48.58
does not bring about a
transformation in the heart
00:49:48.62\00:49:52.49
and the other
person will sense that.
00:49:52.52\00:49:54.36
Until you are tender-hearted,
00:49:54.39\00:49:56.83
until your forgiveness accompany
00:49:56.86\00:49:58.79
is accompanied with compassion,
00:49:58.83\00:50:00.93
then that forgiveness
00:50:00.96\00:50:02.30
should not even
have happened at all,
00:50:02.33\00:50:04.27
it's not going to go anywhere.
00:50:04.30\00:50:05.93
The third part about is
use a peaceful approach.
00:50:05.97\00:50:09.70
Hebrews 12:14, when
you pursue forgiveness,
00:50:09.74\00:50:13.04
use a peaceful approach.
00:50:13.07\00:50:15.01
"Pursue peace with
all people and holiness,
00:50:15.04\00:50:18.61
without which no
one will see the Lord."
00:50:18.65\00:50:21.32
When you walk up
to a person to say,
00:50:21.35\00:50:22.92
you know what?
00:50:22.95\00:50:24.29
This has been on my
heart for a long time,
00:50:24.32\00:50:26.49
do it peacefully.
00:50:26.52\00:50:28.29
Peace is an evidence
00:50:28.32\00:50:30.56
that the Prince of
Peace is operating in you
00:50:30.59\00:50:32.89
and through you.
00:50:32.93\00:50:34.90
Use a peaceful approach.
00:50:34.93\00:50:37.33
The other part, Luke
17:3 explain the offense.
00:50:37.37\00:50:41.97
Never say if I've offended you.
00:50:42.00\00:50:45.71
Well, then
don't even mention it.
00:50:45.74\00:50:47.14
If you don't
know what you've done,
00:50:47.18\00:50:48.51
don't even ask for forgiveness.
00:50:48.54\00:50:50.25
Admit what you've done.
00:50:50.28\00:50:51.68
Luke 17:3,
00:50:51.71\00:50:53.62
"Take heed to yourself.
00:50:53.65\00:50:56.05
If your brother sins
against you rebuke him,
00:50:56.08\00:50:58.75
and if he repents, forgive him."
00:50:58.79\00:51:00.82
Now, let me make a
point about this rebuke.
00:51:00.86\00:51:03.02
Don't rebuke him
like God rebukes a person
00:51:03.06\00:51:05.89
that has no hope,
00:51:05.93\00:51:07.26
rebuke in the
tender-hearted way.
00:51:07.30\00:51:08.96
When you look at the
examples of Jesus rebuking,
00:51:09.00\00:51:12.17
look at what He
said to the woman
00:51:12.20\00:51:13.54
caught in adultery.
00:51:13.57\00:51:14.90
He didn't say,
"Well, I forgive you."
00:51:14.94\00:51:17.54
He said, "Go and sin no more."
00:51:17.57\00:51:19.91
Let's make sure that
this doesn't happen again.
00:51:19.94\00:51:22.21
And we will both do our part
00:51:22.24\00:51:24.31
to secure that this
is a lasting forgiveness.
00:51:24.35\00:51:28.05
The rebuke does not come
from a heart of a judgment,
00:51:28.08\00:51:30.92
a judgmental person,
00:51:30.95\00:51:33.09
but from the heart of a person
00:51:33.12\00:51:34.46
who is occupied by
the Spirit of Christ.
00:51:34.49\00:51:37.99
That has to come from prayer
and asking God to get you ready
00:51:38.03\00:51:41.66
for that powerful
act of forgiveness.
00:51:41.70\00:51:44.10
The other one is caution.
00:51:44.13\00:51:47.80
Forgiveness is
not reconciliation.
00:51:47.84\00:51:50.47
That's right. Yeah.
00:51:50.51\00:51:52.27
Luke 23:34.
00:51:52.31\00:51:54.94
"Jesus said,
'Father forgive them,
00:51:54.98\00:51:56.48
for they do not
know what they do.'"
00:51:56.51\00:51:58.65
And they divided His
garments and cast lots.
00:51:58.68\00:52:01.08
If forgiveness
was reconciliation,
00:52:01.12\00:52:03.15
then when Jesus
forgave those who persecuted,
00:52:03.18\00:52:06.02
he would have been
reconciled to them.
00:52:06.05\00:52:07.69
But that was not reconciliation,
00:52:07.72\00:52:09.72
because they didn't
even know what they did.
00:52:09.76\00:52:12.36
So there was no reconciliation.
Here's the point.
00:52:12.39\00:52:14.56
Forgiveness does
not require two people,
00:52:14.60\00:52:16.93
but reconciliation does.
00:52:16.97\00:52:19.33
Mutual agreement on both parties
00:52:19.37\00:52:21.40
that we need to work this out.
00:52:21.44\00:52:23.54
And then the Lord can
work on both of them together.
00:52:23.57\00:52:26.41
Here are the four steps of
reconciliation very quickly.
00:52:26.44\00:52:29.71
First of all, realization.
00:52:29.74\00:52:31.95
The realization is an awareness
that there isn't a grievance,
00:52:31.98\00:52:36.79
and an acknowledgement
that there is a problem.
00:52:36.82\00:52:39.19
Both parties have to
come to that conclusion.
00:52:39.22\00:52:41.72
If you say that
there's a problem,
00:52:41.76\00:52:43.22
other person says
what are you talking about?
00:52:43.26\00:52:45.13
Well, you're not going
to have reconciliation.
00:52:45.16\00:52:48.20
Here's where that
comes in realization.
00:52:48.23\00:52:50.37
Proverbs 28:13.
00:52:50.40\00:52:51.97
"He who covers his
sin will not prosper.
00:52:52.00\00:52:54.90
But whoever
confesses and forsakes
00:52:54.94\00:52:57.21
them will have mercy."
00:52:57.24\00:52:58.94
From realization, we
go through identification,
00:52:58.97\00:53:01.71
empathizing and
understanding the grievance.
00:53:01.74\00:53:04.81
Explain that.
00:53:04.85\00:53:06.18
How did I offend
you? What did I do?
00:53:06.21\00:53:08.12
Make it clear
00:53:08.15\00:53:09.48
so that when the
reconciliation happens,
00:53:09.52\00:53:11.29
you know on what basis
00:53:11.32\00:53:13.15
that
reconciliation has occurred.
00:53:13.19\00:53:16.16
Be very specific
about what has happened,
00:53:16.19\00:53:18.53
because generalization.
00:53:18.56\00:53:20.40
People might say,
00:53:20.43\00:53:21.76
"Oh, I don't know
what we talked about that.
00:53:21.80\00:53:23.13
But I guess we're okay."
00:53:23.16\00:53:24.50
Be specific, but be
prayerful as you be specific.
00:53:24.53\00:53:28.70
Third thing right,
realization, identification,
00:53:28.74\00:53:31.14
then preparation.
00:53:31.17\00:53:32.61
Preparation, Romans 12:18,
00:53:32.64\00:53:35.14
"If it is possible, as
much as depends on you,
00:53:35.18\00:53:41.08
live peaceably with all men."
00:53:41.12\00:53:44.32
That's preparation.
00:53:44.35\00:53:45.69
Make it a personal
endeavor on your part.
00:53:45.72\00:53:48.26
Now, other people
may not be peaceable.
00:53:48.29\00:53:50.66
But that does not
take you off the hook
00:53:50.69\00:53:52.53
that God has caused you
00:53:52.56\00:53:53.90
to be
responsible for peacefulness,
00:53:53.93\00:53:56.10
as far as it is
possible with you.
00:53:56.13\00:53:58.43
And then fourthly, activation.
00:53:58.47\00:54:00.67
We start with realization,
identification, preparation,
00:54:00.70\00:54:04.77
and then activation.
00:54:04.81\00:54:06.47
What does that mean?
00:54:06.51\00:54:08.24
You got to put it into practice.
00:54:08.28\00:54:10.18
Do what you must to
bring reconciliation.
00:54:10.21\00:54:14.32
James 5:16,
00:54:14.35\00:54:16.18
"Confess your
trespasses to one another,
00:54:16.22\00:54:19.15
and pray for one
another, that you may be healed.
00:54:19.19\00:54:23.32
The effectual fervent
prayer of a righteous man
00:54:23.36\00:54:25.46
avails much."
00:54:25.49\00:54:26.83
And lastly,
00:54:26.86\00:54:28.20
reconciliation is not required
on the part of the offender.
00:54:28.23\00:54:33.03
But reconciliation is required
on the part of the offendee.
00:54:33.07\00:54:36.77
Matthew 5:23.
00:54:36.81\00:54:39.41
"If you bring
your gift to the altar,
00:54:39.44\00:54:41.01
and there remember that
00:54:41.04\00:54:42.38
your brother has
something against you,
00:54:42.41\00:54:44.08
leave your gift
there before the altar,
00:54:44.11\00:54:47.35
and go your way.
00:54:47.38\00:54:48.72
First, be
reconciled to your brother
00:54:48.75\00:54:50.35
and then come
and offer your gift."
00:54:50.39\00:54:52.55
Reconciliation
starts with the person
00:54:52.59\00:54:54.76
that was offended,
00:54:54.79\00:54:56.52
not with the offender.
00:54:56.56\00:54:57.96
Because they may avoid
you the rest of their lives.
00:54:57.99\00:55:00.40
But when you pursue them,
00:55:00.43\00:55:02.10
then your gift
is accepted by God.
00:55:02.13\00:55:05.27
Can I read a short
quote very quickly?
00:55:05.30\00:55:07.47
Desire of Ages,
page 310 powerful.
00:55:07.50\00:55:10.01
"Many are zealous
in religious service,
00:55:10.04\00:55:11.77
while between them
00:55:11.81\00:55:13.14
that their brethren
are unhappy differences,
00:55:13.17\00:55:14.84
which they might reconcile.
00:55:14.88\00:55:16.71
God requires them to
do so in all their power
00:55:16.75\00:55:19.71
to restore harmony.
00:55:19.75\00:55:21.15
Until they do this, He
cannot accept their service.
00:55:21.18\00:55:25.82
The Christian's
duty in this matter
00:55:25.85\00:55:28.12
is clearly pointed out."
00:55:28.16\00:55:29.82
If you don't reconcile,
00:55:29.86\00:55:31.26
and you leave these injuries
00:55:31.29\00:55:32.89
between you and your
brother and just say,
00:55:32.93\00:55:34.36
"I'm going to serve
the Lord" and ignore it.
00:55:34.40\00:55:35.96
He says,
00:55:36.00\00:55:37.33
"Wait a minute, I don't
accept that kind of service.
00:55:37.37\00:55:38.87
Fix it. And then
I accept your gift."
00:55:38.90\00:55:41.40
Amen. What a powerful study.
00:55:41.44\00:55:43.51
We all need it, I need it,
forgiveness, reconciliation.
00:55:43.54\00:55:47.21
Thank you all so much.
00:55:47.24\00:55:48.68
We'll start with Pastor Ryan,
00:55:48.71\00:55:50.05
and just share
a closing thought.
00:55:50.08\00:55:51.41
Yeah, you know, as we
were studying through this,
00:55:51.45\00:55:53.05
my mind was brought
00:55:53.08\00:55:54.42
to the very last
words that Steven spoke,
00:55:54.45\00:55:57.79
and that was as
he was being stoned.
00:55:57.82\00:55:59.72
It says, he knelt down
00:55:59.75\00:56:01.09
and cried out with a loud voice,
00:56:01.12\00:56:02.46
"Lord, do not
charge them with this sin."
00:56:02.49\00:56:04.89
When he had said
this, he fell asleep.
00:56:04.93\00:56:06.66
You know, who am I to expect God
00:56:06.70\00:56:09.56
to forgive me of my sins,
00:56:09.60\00:56:10.93
if I can't forgive others.
00:56:10.97\00:56:12.30
If He can forgive me
00:56:12.33\00:56:13.67
of all the horrible
things I've said and done,
00:56:13.70\00:56:15.04
then surely if I'm
full of the Holy Spirit,
00:56:15.07\00:56:17.21
I can also forgive others
00:56:17.24\00:56:18.91
for the things
that they've done to me.
00:56:18.94\00:56:21.08
If you find that
you're having difficulty
00:56:21.11\00:56:23.88
forgiving someone,
00:56:23.91\00:56:25.98
pray for their
salvation, pray for them.
00:56:26.01\00:56:28.85
And you will be amazed
00:56:28.88\00:56:30.79
how that will
change your perhaps
00:56:30.82\00:56:33.52
the offender has
already passed on.
00:56:33.56\00:56:37.46
Well, just don't
remain encapsulated
00:56:37.49\00:56:43.16
in that time capsule.
00:56:43.20\00:56:45.00
Forgive them
00:56:45.03\00:56:46.37
and you'll no
longer be a victim.
00:56:46.40\00:56:47.84
Thank you so much.
00:56:47.87\00:56:49.27
Luke 6:37, is
all that I will say,
00:56:49.30\00:56:52.41
"Judge not,
00:56:52.44\00:56:53.78
and you shall not be judged.
00:56:53.81\00:56:55.14
Condemn not and you
shall not be condemned.
00:56:55.18\00:56:56.75
Forgive, and you
will be forgiven."
00:56:56.78\00:57:00.25
In short, don't
require more of others
00:57:00.28\00:57:04.62
than Jesus requires of you.
00:57:04.65\00:57:08.02
Amen. Amen.
00:57:08.06\00:57:09.39
Thank you so much,
Pastor John, Pastor Johnny,
00:57:09.42\00:57:11.49
Shelley, and Pastor Ryan.
00:57:11.53\00:57:13.19
What an incredible study.
00:57:13.23\00:57:14.56
I want to leave you
with closing scripture
00:57:14.60\00:57:16.53
of Romans 15.
00:57:16.56\00:57:18.03
We're going to
pick it up in verse 5.
00:57:18.07\00:57:20.10
"Now may the God of
patience and comfort
00:57:20.14\00:57:23.17
grant you to be like
minded toward one another,
00:57:23.20\00:57:26.61
according to Christ Jesus,
00:57:26.64\00:57:28.51
that you may with
one mind and one mouth,
00:57:28.54\00:57:30.81
glorify God the Father."
00:57:30.85\00:57:32.88
I want to encourage you,
00:57:32.91\00:57:34.25
we are brothers
and sisters in Jesus.
00:57:34.28\00:57:37.22
If you have odd against someone,
00:57:37.25\00:57:39.15
go to that
person, seek forgiveness,
00:57:39.19\00:57:42.19
seek reconciliation
00:57:42.22\00:57:44.46
that Pastor John
just talked about.
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The Lord can restore
our hearts, our homes,
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our
relationships, and our churches.
00:57:49.36\00:57:51.93
Join us next
week for Free to Rest.
00:57:51.97\00:57:54.80