The following program
discusses sensitive issues.
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Parents are
cautioned that some material
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may be too candid
for younger children.
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Hello, welcome to Pure Choices.
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My name is
Brittany Hill-Morales,
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and I'm your host
for today's program.
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We have a very
great topic for you today.
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We're talking about
abortion, after the abortion.
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But before we talk
into this very sensitive
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and important topic, let's pray.
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Dear kind and
most heavenly Father,
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please help us as
we're about to discuss
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this very important topic,
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and also to the viewers at home.
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We love You and
we praise Your name,
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in Jesus' name, amen.
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Amen. Amen.
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So we have a very
great panel with us today.
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Over right beside me
is Keith Hackle from Iowa.
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We have over there on the couch,
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two wonderful ladies,
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Dajanae Anderson of Texas
and Sabine Vatel of Michigan.
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We are talking about abortion.
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And we're not talking about
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contemplating the before factor,
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we're talking about after.
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We're talking about
that young lady who,
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she already had the abortion,
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may be she had it when
she wasn't a Christian,
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maybe she had it
when she was a Christian.
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And now, she is hearing
about what it actually means
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and she might have guilt,
all these different things.
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There's a lot
that might be going on,
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before we open
up and discuss more,
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one young lady
who I'm close with,
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she found out she was pregnant,
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and it was very
nerve wrecking for her.
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She didn't tell
anyone but the young man.
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And they sat down
and they discussed,
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you know, I
love you, you love me
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but we're not ready to
have children right now.
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So she went to,
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whoever she went to
and she got the pill,
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an abortion pill.
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And she explained to
me during that evening,
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she literally felt
like she was going to die,
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based on whatever the
pill was doing to her.
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So she assumed
that it was effective,
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and a few months later
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she was going through
the same pregnancy symptoms,
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and it was confirmed,
she was still pregnant.
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Even despite the fact that she
went through all of that pain.
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And her gentleman
at that time said,
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"Okay, well, guess we
have to do another method
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for the abortion."
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And she was like, "No,
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we're not going
through this again.
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I felt like I was about to
die, we're not doing this."
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And now, she has a beautiful boy
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that's three-four years old.
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And this is one of the factors
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that happened
after the abortion,
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most people think
when you do an abortion,
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it's always successful.
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There is no more, no
child but sometimes you do it
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and there is still a child.
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So let's talk about that
for may be just a few moments?
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I believe that, I think
there's been a lot of stories,
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not a lot but
many stories like that,
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that we've heard about on,
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there's different
like documentaries
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and shows and things like that,
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that show I was a child
that my mother tried to abort.
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Or that my parents wanted
to be aborted and now I'm here.
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Sometime, many time, most times
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that's really
traumatic for the child,
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either growing up
knowing that as a truth
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or later on finding out
that, that was the reality.
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And so there is a lot of healing
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that has to take
place with that individual
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to understand that even
if their biological parents
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did not
necessarily want them to live,
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that God had a bigger plan,
and God had a bigger purpose,
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and your life
is that much richer
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because God actually transcended
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the will of a human being
which God doesn't always do.
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But God transcended the will
of a human being and allowed
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because your
life had more purpose
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than your parents
could understand at the time.
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Wow, and you know, I'm
struck with the relief of the...
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I don't know if you said relief,
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if you used that word
but the relief of the mother
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and I know I've heard stories,
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at least one
story of a young lady,
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her testimony is actually that.
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The testimony said I was,
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and she was left
actually with some scars,
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and some disability as a result,
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her mother tried abort her.
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But I've never heard somebody
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who was sorry
that it didn't work,
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which leads me to believe
that most people would...
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I hope that anyway that
abortion is not desirable.
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It's never the first choice
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and it's
something to be avoided.
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I think life makes a
way, God makes a way,
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we believe but life
is meant to be lived.
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I just, I rejoice
in hearing that story
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and the fact that they could
have tried a different method.
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And she said, you know what,
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we tried something
and it didn't work out,
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we just going to
keep moving with this,
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and so I think what we see
in this story is God's hand,
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His hand of protection,
and to that as a young man,
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that child grows into a
young man and later a man,
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it would be great for him to use
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that as a source of
direction and strength,
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so I hope mom shares that story,
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though it may be tough to tell,
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"Hey, I tried to
abort you at one time."
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Because that
could be used to say,
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"Hey, God has a
mission, a purpose for you,
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where it could have
been meant for evil,
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God has turned this
thing out for good."
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And so that could be a motivator
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to lead that young
man would be great.
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I think that's
an excellent point.
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Most of the time when
we hear about a person
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who has already had an abortion,
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we think about the
women, that's the main factor.
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But sometimes
there are these children
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who have survived,
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and I'm glad that we took
that moment just to say that,
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"If you are, in that case
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where you are
unsuccessful abortion,
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successful-unsuccessful
abortion,
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God had a
bigger purpose for you,
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God had a plan for your life.
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And rejoice in that."
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And hopefully, you
know, the parents realize
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is that God probably
did have a better plan,
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and this was a
beautiful thing to happen.
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But we don't want to neglect
the fact that they are women,
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who made the
conscious decision to abort.
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They went, they
completed it, it was done,
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and now that they're Christians,
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may be they were
Christians before
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but now it's at different level,
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it's that deep
connection with God.
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They are feeling
this guilt, this remorse.
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How do you heal
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as a female after an abortion?
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How do you heal?
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I mean that's a
very difficult...
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I believe that's a
very difficult question
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in terms of how do you heal.
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There you have to understand,
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in part you have to understand
and accept the gospel of truth
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that "All have sinned and
come short of the glory of God."
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But that God
still gave up His life
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in place of the wrong
decisions that you have made,
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that covers the decisions
that you make consciously
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and unconsciously
or not fully conscious
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of what you were
doing at the time,
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and to understand
that you don't have to live
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in that guilt, it's more than,
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sometimes I think we
know that as factual truth,
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but it's hard for
us to receive that,
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that God truly loves me.
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That may be true for the person
who just lied or the person
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who just stole something.
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But that may not be true for me,
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once I realize that I've
ended a life that God may have,
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you know, wanted me to
actually go through with,
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or be there for the process
of, and so that it's difficult,
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I would say I can
understand, I can relay,
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I can empathize with
the difficult reality
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of that process.
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As you were talking, I
think it would be difficult,
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and we don't
have that experience
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but you know, I
know I've two friends
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who've walked that
journey, and who in their 20s,
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who made that decision.
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And it haunted them actually
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and it manifested
itself in such self-hate.
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They may not know
that was at the time
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but in terms of their choices,
and how they self punished,
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and until one of them had turn
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during a counseling session
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with a Christian
counselor that came out,
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and it just kind of,
the flood of tears came
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and it was actually
like grief of losing a baby.
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Whether or not it
was through abortion
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but for her it
was the realization
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that I lost my son
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and I don't know how
she knew it was a boy.
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I think she either
was told, I'm not sure
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but she had lost her son,
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and you go through
a real cycle of grief.
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She allowed herself to
go through grief actually.
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Yeah, and by the
way this is a grief that
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it's hard to talk
to somebody else about.
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It's like you bought it upon
yourself that's what she felt.
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I mean, you
bought it upon yourself,
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now you're going to grieve,
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so who do you turn to
when you carry that guilt
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and the grief at the same time,
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so like you said,
difficult is the word.
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Yes, and I've friends too,
I've one friend in particular
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who shared with me.
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When I would hang
out, we would hang out,
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we would go out, and we
would go to the grocery store,
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and there would
be a baby crying,
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and she would get so upset
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and just be
talking bad about the mom,
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and how the mom needs to
get the baby under control.
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And one day we were
talking and she shared with me
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that she had an
abortion years before
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and that, that is why
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it bothers her
to hear a child cry
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because the crying
and the dissatisfaction
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of a child she realizes,
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she feels like she
is hearing her child cry
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in pain of the
abortion, and so that was,
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that's something that I
think she is still processing.
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She never went, and
necessarily got help for it,
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and there were
many bad decisions
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that came,
relationship decisions
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that she would have never...
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That she, before the abortion
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when she was in the relationship
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with the young man,
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they were, you know,
they weren't married and,
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of course, you should be married
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but they were at
least monogamous.
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And that, you know,
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but it was still pre-marital sex
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and but when that
relationship ended,
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she was just promiscuous.
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Oh, wow.
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After the ending
of that relationship,
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and the abortion of the child,
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I believe heavier
the abortion of the child
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caused her to
feel like you said,
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a little bit devalued.
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She felt devalued as a woman.
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And that I'm
supposed to bring life,
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and I've ended that function,
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and so the other
natural functions
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are no longer relevant to me.
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It really is a
form of punishing,
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that's punishment.
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I mean, some young ladies
listening to us right now,
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who're punishing themselves
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and were haunted
by that decision.
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Just from a pastor's
point of view if I could,
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I can't give the
female perspective
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but there's a
word that's important
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and that's repent.
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And I think a
lot of these issues
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when we go
through that self abuse,
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self defeating behavior is
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because we don't feel like
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we've received the
forgiveness that we need.
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And so the first
step to that is saying,
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"Hey, God, I messed up.
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I made a mistake." Right?
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And the Bible says
that He is faithful
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and just to forgive us, right?
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And so once we
believe that He's forgiven us,
00:12:59.71\00:13:02.48
then we're able to walk
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in the newness
of that forgiveness.
00:13:04.61\00:13:06.95
And so I want to
encourage any young lady
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who's gone through this process,
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and is feeling like they
don't have that connection,
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really check and see if you've
really repented of this thing.
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If you say at least, I've
made a mistake, I'm sorry.
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I won't go down that path again
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and start that process
of healing through believing
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that God has forgiven you.
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In my life
there's been times where,
00:13:31.54\00:13:33.44
if I didn't feel like
He's forgiven me, right,
00:13:33.48\00:13:36.18
then I would still
beat myself up about it,
00:13:36.21\00:13:38.45
but if God has forgiven you,
00:13:38.48\00:13:41.18
then you're in a place
where you can start rebuilding
00:13:41.22\00:13:44.19
and get to a
better relationship.
00:13:44.22\00:13:45.95
True, true.
00:13:45.99\00:13:47.99
As we are talking about
women and what they go through,
00:13:48.02\00:13:51.59
I want to also
take a moment for men,
00:13:51.63\00:13:54.53
the potential who could
have been a father to be.
00:13:54.56\00:13:58.10
And who
possibly wanted that baby
00:13:58.13\00:14:02.00
or may be they
didn't want the baby
00:14:02.04\00:14:03.37
and now they're
thinking about it,
00:14:03.41\00:14:05.47
"Wait, I could have had
like a five year old right now,
00:14:05.51\00:14:08.78
I could have had who know may be
00:14:08.81\00:14:10.65
the future President
of the United States."
00:14:10.68\00:14:13.35
Depending how far
back the abortion was.
00:14:13.38\00:14:18.09
They are going through
their own set of realities
00:14:18.12\00:14:20.66
and most of the
times it's just like,
00:14:20.69\00:14:22.12
okay, you are a man, suck it up,
00:14:22.16\00:14:23.89
it wasn't your body.
00:14:23.93\00:14:25.29
But technically part of
him did die with that abortion.
00:14:25.33\00:14:30.73
So you could talk a
little bit about the guy,
00:14:30.77\00:14:32.93
how do we encourage our
men who have these feelings?
00:14:32.97\00:14:36.81
I think, the position of healing
00:14:36.84\00:14:43.35
and accepting the
love of God still applies,
00:14:43.38\00:14:47.68
definitely still
applies and so in which way.
00:14:47.72\00:14:52.12
There is
something that the young men
00:14:52.15\00:14:57.43
have something to
relate to God about.
00:14:57.46\00:15:00.33
In that you lost your child,
00:15:00.36\00:15:03.16
that you've experienced
the death of your child,
00:15:03.20\00:15:06.27
and so that for me
just highlights the gospel
00:15:06.30\00:15:11.54
in what happened.
00:15:11.57\00:15:12.91
Now, it's not in fullness,
it's definitely not in fullness
00:15:12.94\00:15:17.55
but there is an understanding
that God understands grief.
00:15:17.58\00:15:21.22
And to know as a man
that God understands grief,
00:15:21.25\00:15:25.75
that the Father
God understands grief
00:15:25.79\00:15:28.56
and that even Jesus Christ
00:15:28.59\00:15:30.93
understood the reality
00:15:30.96\00:15:35.70
that everyone will
not fully accept Him,
00:15:35.73\00:15:38.83
that His children will die
or something outside of God...
00:15:38.87\00:15:45.31
God has the potential, right?
00:15:45.34\00:15:47.01
So I'm just
going to say it clear.
00:15:47.04\00:15:48.38
God has the potential
00:15:48.41\00:15:50.01
to control each
and every one of us.
00:15:50.05\00:15:52.95
God has the ability is a better,
00:15:52.98\00:15:55.78
you know, better term.
00:15:55.82\00:15:57.29
But God chooses to allow
us to make our own decisions,
00:15:57.32\00:16:02.52
God restrains Himself.
00:16:02.56\00:16:04.49
And so for the young man
00:16:04.53\00:16:06.49
that could not force
the young woman or the man,
00:16:06.53\00:16:12.63
the grown man who
could not force the woman
00:16:12.67\00:16:16.37
to make the decision
that he wanted her to make.
00:16:16.40\00:16:20.64
There's something that you
have relatability with God on
00:16:20.68\00:16:26.31
because God also
does not force us
00:16:26.35\00:16:30.29
but still
suffers the consequences
00:16:30.32\00:16:33.36
of the decisions that we make.
00:16:33.39\00:16:35.86
And so being able to know
that you do not grieve alone,
00:16:35.89\00:16:39.96
and that it's okay to cry,
and it is okay to hurt as a man
00:16:40.00\00:16:44.73
because of that loss,
00:16:44.77\00:16:46.53
is something that
is definitely present
00:16:46.57\00:16:49.07
in the gospel message.
00:16:49.10\00:16:50.77
You know, and I've met men
who have come to my office,
00:16:50.81\00:16:54.81
who had that
grief but especially
00:16:54.84\00:16:57.51
because they were the
ones who said, "Do it,
00:16:57.55\00:17:00.75
I don't want to deal
with this baby right now.
00:17:00.78\00:17:02.42
I want you to get rid of it."
00:17:02.45\00:17:03.85
And as they've grown,
they get to know the Lord,
00:17:03.89\00:17:06.22
that too is in their
mind like I caused this,
00:17:06.25\00:17:08.62
you know, this woman
to make this decision
00:17:08.66\00:17:11.16
because I wasn't willing
to take that responsibility.
00:17:11.19\00:17:13.93
And I think, this idea
that you present, Dajanae,
00:17:13.96\00:17:18.47
about forgiveness, and
grief, and forgiving yourself,
00:17:18.50\00:17:23.34
forgiving the young
person that you were,
00:17:23.37\00:17:24.87
what you knew at the time,
00:17:24.91\00:17:26.68
and just coming to
speak to somebody and say,
00:17:26.71\00:17:29.54
"I just need relief
from this guilt as well too."
00:17:29.58\00:17:32.58
So there're men who
probably saying to us,
00:17:32.61\00:17:34.88
we're going
through that as well,
00:17:34.92\00:17:36.25
and God's forgiveness is real,
00:17:36.28\00:17:38.25
and can be experienced,
even for them, even for you.
00:17:38.29\00:17:40.86
Yeah.
00:17:40.89\00:17:42.22
I believe it. Yeah.
00:17:42.26\00:17:43.63
It's, it's...
00:17:43.66\00:17:44.99
I can't imagine it in talking,
talking that's all I can say
00:17:45.03\00:17:50.87
because you mentioned something
and guys hear this a lot,
00:17:50.90\00:17:54.84
this is my body, right,
00:17:54.87\00:17:56.20
especially as it
relates to abortion,
00:17:56.24\00:17:57.57
"This is my body,
00:17:57.61\00:17:59.01
I've got to carry this
child for this period of time."
00:17:59.04\00:18:02.38
And so at the end of the day,
the man's hands are truly tied.
00:18:02.41\00:18:08.02
In this instance,
there is really nothing,
00:18:08.05\00:18:10.75
that they could do,
so recovering after that,
00:18:10.79\00:18:13.76
dealing with it after
that, I think being transparent,
00:18:13.79\00:18:16.59
finding some individuals
that you can confine in
00:18:16.62\00:18:19.33
and say, "Hey, I
am feeling this way."
00:18:19.36\00:18:21.60
And not allowing that loss
in that particular situation
00:18:21.63\00:18:25.50
to cause you to
go and do something,
00:18:25.53\00:18:27.84
to kind of make up for
that loss, right, so...
00:18:27.87\00:18:30.44
Right, they can
have another baby.
00:18:30.47\00:18:31.81
Right, you can take
somebody else, right?
00:18:31.84\00:18:33.91
Right.
00:18:33.94\00:18:35.28
And you make a mistake
in the midst of a mistake
00:18:35.31\00:18:38.25
having already been made.
00:18:38.28\00:18:39.61
Yeah.
00:18:39.65\00:18:40.98
And so it takes really,
really trying to be patient
00:18:41.02\00:18:46.15
through that thing
and understand that thing,
00:18:46.19\00:18:48.29
asking God to give you clarity,
and really talking to people.
00:18:48.32\00:18:50.56
And his perspective.
Yes, his perspective.
00:18:50.59\00:18:52.79
Yeah, and really
talking to people
00:18:52.83\00:18:54.36
because I can imagine that,
00:18:54.40\00:18:56.20
that's a difficult
thing to deal with.
00:18:56.23\00:18:58.53
And it's not only difficult
for the woman and the father,
00:18:58.57\00:19:03.04
it's also
difficult for anyone else
00:19:03.07\00:19:04.51
who probably would
have known about it.
00:19:04.54\00:19:05.87
Yes.
00:19:05.91\00:19:07.24
If the young man
ran and told his mom,
00:19:07.28\00:19:09.34
"She lost a grandchild."
00:19:09.38\00:19:10.71
Yes. Right.
00:19:10.75\00:19:12.38
Sisters lost that
potentially is their nephew.
00:19:12.41\00:19:14.48
Right.
00:19:14.52\00:19:15.85
And that's one thing that you
have in the back of your head.
00:19:15.88\00:19:19.42
Right.
00:19:19.45\00:19:20.96
It may not have been the
child that was in your womb
00:19:20.99\00:19:23.86
but it is part of your heart.
00:19:23.89\00:19:25.23
Right.
00:19:25.26\00:19:26.59
And one thing that...
00:19:26.63\00:19:27.96
I remember one of my
professors was talking about
00:19:28.00\00:19:29.63
when he deals with
women who have had abortions,
00:19:29.66\00:19:32.87
I would break this up
to even a widest spectrum
00:19:32.90\00:19:35.90
for the grandmother,
the potential aunty,
00:19:35.94\00:19:39.84
the uncle, the father,
another child's memory.
00:19:39.87\00:19:45.61
Abortion is something
that, it's truly broken,
00:19:45.65\00:19:52.29
it creates this level
of brokenness in humanity
00:19:52.32\00:19:55.76
that we can't even fully begin
00:19:55.79\00:19:59.23
to fully
comprehend and understand.
00:19:59.26\00:20:01.83
The brokenness,
everybody gets torn open
00:20:01.86\00:20:04.80
when it comes to children.
00:20:04.83\00:20:06.17
We hear all types of
different levels of hurt,
00:20:06.20\00:20:08.90
abuse, crimes, misfortunes,
but when it comes to children,
00:20:08.94\00:20:13.24
it's always something
that touches the heart
00:20:13.27\00:20:15.44
and breaks you.
00:20:15.48\00:20:17.35
And when you come to this point
as a Christian and it hits you
00:20:17.38\00:20:21.05
that someone who could
have been here was taken away,
00:20:21.08\00:20:23.85
especially if you
didn't fully understand
00:20:23.89\00:20:25.45
what you were doing,
00:20:25.49\00:20:26.82
especially if you
didn't fully grasp the fact
00:20:26.86\00:20:28.19
that this was a person
00:20:28.22\00:20:30.83
that God wanted into this world.
00:20:30.86\00:20:35.43
The world may not
hold you accountable for it
00:20:35.46\00:20:37.20
but you feel like
you need to hold yourself
00:20:37.23\00:20:38.73
accountable for it.
00:20:38.77\00:20:40.40
And coming to God and saying,
00:20:40.44\00:20:43.34
"Lord, I know
that this was wrong,
00:20:43.37\00:20:47.28
I know that this
should not have happened,
00:20:47.31\00:20:51.68
and I'm feeling broken inside."
00:20:51.71\00:20:55.18
You have to say,
"Lord, I need you to heal me,
00:20:55.22\00:20:57.95
I need you to
start doing something.
00:20:57.99\00:20:59.59
Show me who to talk to,
show me who to relate to,
00:20:59.62\00:21:02.36
show me is there specific
group I need to find support in"
00:21:02.39\00:21:06.80
'cause there are
abortion support groups.
00:21:06.83\00:21:09.06
Sure.
00:21:09.10\00:21:10.43
And one thing, again,
my professor was saying is
00:21:10.47\00:21:12.13
to have a memorial service.
00:21:12.17\00:21:14.40
Yeah.
00:21:14.44\00:21:15.77
That's one firm way of having,
I don't want to say closure
00:21:15.80\00:21:18.87
'cause you don't really get
00:21:18.91\00:21:20.24
over the fact of losing a child,
00:21:20.28\00:21:21.84
but it brings some sort
of healing to the table,
00:21:21.88\00:21:25.18
where you actually say,
let's have a little box,
00:21:25.21\00:21:28.78
put a little something in that
could have been for the baby.
00:21:28.82\00:21:31.62
Dig a hole and bury
and then say a few words.
00:21:31.65\00:21:34.12
To say, express or get
whatever it is off your chest,
00:21:34.16\00:21:36.96
write a letter, do
these different things.
00:21:36.99\00:21:39.76
And we don't want to say
that we have all the answers
00:21:39.79\00:21:42.30
to heal you from whatever
it is you're going through.
00:21:42.33\00:21:45.60
God is the first one
who has the healing plan,
00:21:45.63\00:21:47.64
has the healing elements
and you need to talk to God
00:21:47.67\00:21:50.01
and say God, "Who
else do I need to speak to.
00:21:50.04\00:21:52.21
You led me to this program,
what else do I need to go to
00:21:52.24\00:21:55.74
because I'm realizing
the mess that I put myself in
00:21:55.78\00:21:59.01
and the mess I put others in."
00:21:59.05\00:22:00.38
Yes.
00:22:00.42\00:22:01.75
And I want to find
redemption, but there are people
00:22:01.78\00:22:04.35
who're looking at
this and they are like,
00:22:04.39\00:22:05.72
"I don't feel anything."
00:22:05.75\00:22:07.09
That's true.
00:22:07.12\00:22:08.46
They're like I did it...
00:22:08.49\00:22:09.82
And that's true.
00:22:09.86\00:22:11.19
And there is, I
think that 'cause it's true
00:22:11.23\00:22:14.43
and I think that
sometimes with a lot of things,
00:22:14.46\00:22:20.60
since, you know,
that one may partake in,
00:22:20.64\00:22:25.07
you may not feel the
effects of it right away.
00:22:25.11\00:22:27.68
You may not even
feel the effects of it
00:22:27.71\00:22:29.88
two, three, five years
from now but you are affected.
00:22:29.91\00:22:34.95
And so I think,
some people misunderstand
00:22:34.98\00:22:38.85
being affected
and feeling affected.
00:22:38.89\00:22:43.22
Those two things are different.
00:22:43.26\00:22:45.06
You may not feel
affected but you are,
00:22:45.09\00:22:50.67
you made a
decision, a huge decision,
00:22:50.70\00:22:54.97
no matter how old you were,
00:22:55.00\00:22:56.44
no matter where you
were in your development,
00:22:56.47\00:22:58.37
you made a huge
decision and you are affected.
00:22:58.41\00:23:01.34
You make decisions either
consciously or subconsciously
00:23:01.38\00:23:06.01
based on that
decision that you made,
00:23:06.05\00:23:08.25
that's just the reality of life.
00:23:08.28\00:23:09.98
As we mature, as we
grow, as we become adults,
00:23:10.02\00:23:15.99
and even mature
through adulthood,
00:23:16.02\00:23:18.56
each decision makes
us a part of who we are,
00:23:18.59\00:23:21.96
each decision, because we have
to take responsibility for us,
00:23:22.00\00:23:26.50
even if we don't
take responsibility
00:23:26.53\00:23:28.20
for our decision, right?
00:23:28.24\00:23:29.84
It is something
for the first time,
00:23:29.87\00:23:32.84
I was able to
make this decision.
00:23:32.87\00:23:34.84
Does that make sense?
00:23:34.88\00:23:36.21
Like, I was able
for the first time
00:23:36.24\00:23:38.31
to make such decision
and that can be empowering
00:23:38.35\00:23:42.38
or that can place a
certain amount of fear
00:23:42.42\00:23:45.12
inside of us
00:23:45.15\00:23:46.49
because I now realize
00:23:46.52\00:23:47.96
that I'm capable of
making a harsh decision.
00:23:47.99\00:23:52.99
There is another
friend that I have,
00:23:53.03\00:23:55.73
who, you know,
shared with me the effects
00:23:55.76\00:23:58.57
that she's begun to feel,
00:23:58.60\00:24:00.40
have been based on,
she feels like a mother.
00:24:00.44\00:24:05.31
She said, "I feel like
a mother when I see...'
00:24:05.34\00:24:08.68
Cause before I got pregnant
I didn't care about kids,
00:24:08.71\00:24:11.21
little kids, I didn't
want little kids around me,
00:24:11.25\00:24:13.62
you know, anything like that."
00:24:13.65\00:24:15.38
She was like, " I
wasn't an affectionate person
00:24:15.42\00:24:18.35
but after having my abortion,
00:24:18.39\00:24:23.49
I understand my
mother's love in a way
00:24:23.53\00:24:27.00
that I never understood
my mother's love before.
00:24:27.03\00:24:30.77
I care for little
children as I see,
00:24:30.80\00:24:34.20
you know, they may be making,
00:24:34.24\00:24:36.17
you know, small decisions
00:24:36.20\00:24:37.54
that may cause
them to fall down or,
00:24:37.57\00:24:40.34
you know, get hit by a car
because you run in the street,"
00:24:40.38\00:24:43.28
like these parental instincts,
00:24:43.31\00:24:46.38
she said, "Kicked
in, after my abortion."
00:24:46.41\00:24:50.89
And so there are
so many side effects,
00:24:50.92\00:24:54.66
lifelong side effects
to having an abortion,
00:24:54.69\00:24:59.13
whether you realize it or not.
00:24:59.16\00:25:01.73
When she said, "I
feel like a mother."
00:25:01.76\00:25:03.10
I'm telling myself, uh,
she is a mother of a child
00:25:03.13\00:25:06.00
who is gone and that's
why the grief is so deep.
00:25:06.03\00:25:09.34
That's true. That's true.
00:25:09.37\00:25:10.71
And I just want
to speak to the idea
00:25:10.74\00:25:12.81
of an individual not feeling
any type of weight after this
00:25:12.84\00:25:16.85
and I think, if you find
yourself ever in a situation
00:25:16.88\00:25:19.81
where you've committed a sin
00:25:19.85\00:25:21.58
and you don't feel bad about it.
00:25:21.62\00:25:23.52
If you are a Christian,
00:25:23.55\00:25:24.92
then you definitely
need to have a gut check.
00:25:24.95\00:25:27.59
There really
needs to be a discussion
00:25:27.62\00:25:29.56
between you and God,
I mean because Romans,
00:25:29.59\00:25:32.43
Romans is one of
my favorite chapter,
00:25:32.46\00:25:34.56
goes through this list of things
00:25:34.60\00:25:37.10
that humanity has begun
to do from homosexuality
00:25:37.13\00:25:40.87
to just all type of craziness
and not feeling bad about it.
00:25:40.90\00:25:46.37
And God says, okay,
well, here is the thing,
00:25:46.41\00:25:48.48
I'm going to let you do this,
00:25:48.51\00:25:49.84
I'm going to turn you
over to your wicked ways
00:25:49.88\00:25:52.01
but understand
this, there is a response,
00:25:52.05\00:25:55.15
there are some
repercussions to this.
00:25:55.18\00:25:57.75
And so, if I'm a Christian
00:25:57.79\00:26:00.39
and I've gone through something,
00:26:00.42\00:26:02.06
made a bad
decision, and I'm sitting back
00:26:02.09\00:26:03.89
and I'm like,"
00:26:03.93\00:26:05.26
Hey, I don't feel any
type of weight about that."
00:26:05.29\00:26:07.10
I should be concerned,
00:26:07.13\00:26:08.80
we should be because that means,
00:26:08.83\00:26:10.80
I'm now in a position
00:26:10.83\00:26:13.20
where I'm doing things
that directly oppose God.
00:26:13.23\00:26:15.07
Right.
00:26:15.10\00:26:16.44
And I'm saying as a Christian,
I don't have a problem with it.
00:26:16.47\00:26:18.97
Right.
00:26:19.01\00:26:20.34
'Cause there is a reality
00:26:20.38\00:26:22.21
that the Spirit of
God is with us all,
00:26:22.24\00:26:25.48
the Spirit of God convicts us,
00:26:25.51\00:26:27.45
the Spirit of God encourages us.
00:26:27.48\00:26:29.85
And so if you're saying
00:26:29.88\00:26:31.95
that you do not
feel the effects of sin,
00:26:31.99\00:26:36.26
then that means
you are rejecting
00:26:36.29\00:26:40.70
what the Spirit of God is
trying to communicate to you,
00:26:40.73\00:26:44.27
and so that's
nothing to boast about.
00:26:44.30\00:26:46.23
Oh, you might feel
some type of weight,
00:26:46.27\00:26:47.70
you know, people will say.
00:26:47.74\00:26:49.07
You may feel
some type of weight.
00:26:49.10\00:26:50.44
You may bring
your feelings about it
00:26:50.47\00:26:51.81
but I've made my
feelings about it,
00:26:51.84\00:26:53.51
it's bigger than
feelings and emotions.
00:26:53.54\00:26:55.78
It's much bigger than that.
00:26:55.81\00:26:57.15
And that's completely
the case the way it is.
00:26:57.18\00:27:01.55
And I love the fact
00:27:01.58\00:27:02.92
how long we have
been discussing right now,
00:27:02.95\00:27:04.99
it brings to the fact that
for our church communities,
00:27:05.02\00:27:07.62
local communities for women, men
00:27:07.66\00:27:10.49
that are dealing with the fact
that an abortion has happened.
00:27:10.53\00:27:13.86
We need to support them
00:27:13.90\00:27:15.23
realizing that there
are deep emotional hurts
00:27:15.26\00:27:18.63
that are going on,
00:27:18.67\00:27:20.00
so of course we want you
00:27:20.04\00:27:21.37
to keep on
having that discussion,
00:27:21.40\00:27:22.74
not only have a discussion,
get into action mode.
00:27:22.77\00:27:25.61
What can you do
to support women, men
00:27:25.64\00:27:29.04
who are considering abortion
00:27:29.08\00:27:30.45
and who have
actually had the abortion?
00:27:30.48\00:27:32.28
How can you help them
come about and have healing?
00:27:32.31\00:27:34.62
It's not about judging
them, and condemning them,
00:27:34.65\00:27:37.09
and reminding them
what they did wrong.
00:27:37.12\00:27:40.76
Yes, we should tell them
that they did something wrong
00:27:40.79\00:27:42.82
but you also need to bring
about that healing process,
00:27:42.86\00:27:45.76
so that they can be
where they need to be.
00:27:45.79\00:27:48.56
For the wages of sin is
dead but God, who He is,
00:27:48.60\00:27:51.83
He redeems us.
00:27:51.87\00:27:53.77
So go forth in that redemption
00:27:53.80\00:27:55.70
and let that be
your pure choice.
00:27:55.74\00:27:58.01