The following program
discusses sensitive issues.
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Parents are
cautioned that some material
00:00:03.30\00:00:05.07
may be too candid
for younger children.
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Hello, and
welcome to Pure Choices.
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I'm your host
Pastor Joshua Nelson,
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so glad you decided to join us.
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This is gonna be a
very nice romantic program.
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We're interviewing
some married couples.
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They're gonna talk
about how they met,
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and their marriages
now, it's gonna great.
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Especially, since a lot of
them weren't married before
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and they're married now
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and so we're gonna see
how they are post marriage.
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So let's get into
it but before that,
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let's bow for a word of prayer.
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Heavenly Father God,
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we ask that You
will be with us now
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as we talk about
marriage in Jesus' name we pray.
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Amen. All right. Amen.
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So I say what I said before
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because we've had Brittany
Hill on the program before.
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We've had Kory on
the program before
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but they were not
married the last time.
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So now you all
have been married,
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isn't that nice?
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So here are they,
they're sniffing in others.
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Brittany married Xavier Morales.
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So glad for the
Morales family being here.
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And Kory
betrothed Kimberly Samson
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and so now Kimberly Douglas,
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so happy to have
you guys here with us.
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And, of course, I
got married as well.
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I gonna shout out to my wife,
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the beautiful
former Kimberley Doss,
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love you baby.
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She unfortunately can't be here.
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So you'll see that I'm all
by myself over here lonely.
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She can't come out
because she is in school.
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So thankful that
she is doing that,
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but happy that
you guys are here.
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We wanna talk to you
guys about your marriages.
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We wanna talk about how you met.
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We wanna talk about, you
know, some tips giving for those
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who are looking to
get married or courting.
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And kind of see
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how a Christian
marriage looks like,
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y'all in the very
first beginning stages,
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but we wanna hear your
story, I think it'd be nice.
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So let's see which
couple will I begin with.
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Let's start with the newest...
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Yes. The Morales family.
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Yes. How did you all meet?
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Well, I was working
at off campus ministry
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as a bouncer,
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reason there used
to have a bar next door
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so they wanna do security.
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And, you know,
you've got a lot of people
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coming in and out,
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you've got males,
females coming in,
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and they're going,
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listening to poetry
and music and everything.
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And all a sudden
this girl walks in
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and just completely made me
feel stupid like mesmerized,
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I was like, I had to
pick up my jaw off the floor.
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And I'm sitting there
like why am I feeling this way
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like whatever.
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And then her friend come over,
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they get off from the
area that they're playing music
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and they go over
to have a conversation
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by the steps about,
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you know, the
affects of alcohol,
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drinking, and how
dumb it is and all this.
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So, you know me, I've
been through that before
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and all that, so I was like,
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I'm about to make an impression.
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Correct.
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Bad one or good one,
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I'll make you some
kind of impression.
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She gonna
remember my name tonight.
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Yes, sir.
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So I just jumped
in the conversation.
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They both looked at
me kind of weird like
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what is this guy talking about?
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But I know after that night,
she should remember my name.
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And then after that I
think, well, you can fill that
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and after that, go ahead.
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I don't think you ever
told me what your name was.
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You just jumped
into the conversation.
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And afterwards, we
just looked at each other
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and then he went
off inside of dancing
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because he wanted to
listen to Puer to Rican music.
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Yes, yes, yes. It was so weird.
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I left just feeling weird
from the entire experience.
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And then I think
as time progressed,
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we just became friends on
Facebook, we spoke on Skype,
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we found out that we
were both in the seminary
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and we're in the
same classes together,
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and we just kept on
talking and slowly but surely,
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we grew closer and closer.
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Because that's where I met you,
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'cause I thought
you were undergrad.
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And then in a seminary we
had a class and I look over
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and I'm like, "Oh,
this girl is here,"
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I'm like, "Oh,
what I'm gonna do now?"
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Like, "I already
made an impression,
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what I'm gonna, I don't know.
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What's the next step?
What's the next step?"
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So that's when we became friends
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through Facebook
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and we started
talking and I know, I guess,
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our friendship
started growing once
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she had a situation happened to
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where she need me to step in.
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Oh, somebody calling her,
somebody randomly calling her
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so I called their number
back and spoke to the person
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let him know, you know,
what they were doing was wrong.
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And as a favor she later on
asked me to go on a Groupon.
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Okay.
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You know, I don't
know what that was.
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Groupon, I'm thinking
group, group on, group.
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And she asked me
to go out to eat.
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So I'm thinking, okay,
we're gonna go as a group.
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Okay, okay.
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You know, I'm trying to
do the Christian thing go
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as a group.
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So there, you know,
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I'm sitting there
and I'm like group on,
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how many people you need?
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This is all
through Facebook, at class.
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Yeah, yeah.
Don't do that in class.
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I asked her she is like,
how many people you need?
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She is like, two.
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You know, I'm in the seminary
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and I'm thinking of
somebody's women or husbands.
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And now I'm trying to be
by myself right now just me
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and the Lord, I'm
like, "Oh, she is thirsty."
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I'm like, no, I'm
like, I can't do this.
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And I avoided her
for the next two weeks
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or so and I just,
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and God just
kept pushing me like,
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poking on me
saying, go, get to know her,
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go get to know her.
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You know, she is a good friend.
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So that ended up being
the first date for y'all?
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It wasn't a date.
No, that wasn't a date.
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All right. I'm sorry.
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I was so confused
'cause I was saying to myself,
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why is he telling me, he needs
to get paid from his job first?
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What, all these
excuses, my car needs gas.
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I'm like, it's
just to get sandwiches,
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what's going on?
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And I think now remembering,
I think I was speaking to Josh,
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and I was like,
"Josh, do you wanna go
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and get Christmas
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'cause this person just
keeps stromboling me off."
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Oh, that was the
Christmas day. Yes.
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You know what, let not
'cause I told this person
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I was going to go,
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I just don't know why
he keeps on avoiding me,
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he is like that
sounds strange too.
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It was just so
confusing. Yes, buddy.
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So, okay, I didn't
even know that was coming.
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So how did you, guys,
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transition from that
awkwardness to actually being,
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I guess dating
or y'all been dating
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or how did it go from there?
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Our story is very unique.
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And that's when I
started to do seminary,
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I realized there
was a lot of things
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that happened to me
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that I didn't
address growing up.
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I was abused
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and I never
really spoke about it,
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didn't really, it
didn't really click in my mind
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until I started to do seminary
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and we started
taking these classes
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to help us realize how
messed up we really are.
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And I was really
broken and I was going through
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a lot of things
sort of point that,
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I even had
depression and I was suicidal,
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and Xavier was
being that type of person
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where when nobody
else really realized
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what was going on, I don't
know how he had an inclination,
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how he had a feeling but he did
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and he kept on being
there and supporting me.
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And I think even once
I told him I hate you,
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go away and he still was there.
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Wow.
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There was just so
many things going on.
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Wow. Yeah.
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The Holy Spirit using
him to be there for you
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at the time.
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Wow, that's
beautiful and I see, you know,
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it's very emotional
for you to talk about,
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you know, powerful story.
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So you all have
an awesome journey,
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first how you met
and find a funny story
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but then really got serious
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and how Lord kind of
really brought you all together
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for a specific
reason, that's powerful.
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Now I'm gonna
transition to the Douglas's
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and y'all top in now.
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But how did y'all meet.
Let's go and talk to you, guys.
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You got that, go ahead...
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So we met at while studying
in Oakwood, then college,
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now university and
we actually had friends,
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mutual friends that
were dating each other.
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I had a friend from New
York, a young lady that Kim met
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that was I believe from Atlanta.
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And they were
dating, they were, you know,
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all into each other,
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we were kind of just the
wing man and woman, you know.
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And so we just ended
up in the same places
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all the time.
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And eventually, I don't
know if there was any initial,
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you know, attraction like that,
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you know, Kim is not
ugly so but I wasn't.
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I'm not saying I wasn't
like spooning, I wouldn't,
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honestly wouldn't
really thinking about,
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you know, anything
and I think one day
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I just was
paying attention to her
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and I was like, you
know, it's kind of cute.
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And I started asking my friends
like am I crazy as, you know,
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she is kind of cute.
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And then eventually I
said something to her,
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she really won't have anything
to do with me, you know,
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because at that time I really
wasn't living that kind of life
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with that any
girl would wanna have,
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well, some girls
would want to have something
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but she would
not, not the girl...
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Not the good girl.
He's gonna hold some girls.
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So and eventually
we started talking
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which it was also a pivotal time
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in my life as well
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because I was going
through a serious phase,
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I was Jonahing, I was
kind of running from God
00:09:24.23\00:09:27.96
and, you know,
I was at the point
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where I didn't
really care about life
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and Kim kind of helped me
through all of that good stuff.
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I think after talking we
eventually started dating.
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And so, Kim,
from your perspective
00:09:39.47\00:09:40.81
how did the meeting take place?
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It's pretty, I guess my version
is pretty close to what he said
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but yeah, he's right.
00:09:47.68\00:09:49.75
The Kory that you
see today was not Kory,
00:09:49.78\00:09:53.22
you know, back then and so...
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He had beads...
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He had beads. He had beads?
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Yeah, beads. Mercy.
00:09:57.39\00:09:58.73
Wow. No.
00:09:58.76\00:10:00.10
Yes, he has beads.
00:10:00.13\00:10:01.86
And so, and then I
guess at that point too,
00:10:01.90\00:10:05.63
I always had
this, I'm not dating you
00:10:05.67\00:10:08.44
if I don't know
you kind of thing.
00:10:08.47\00:10:10.91
And so I wasn't going to rush
into anything and so, you know,
00:10:10.94\00:10:16.64
it took a while for us to get
to that dating point because,
00:10:16.68\00:10:21.22
you know, I just
wanted to feel okay...
00:10:21.25\00:10:23.32
Okay, well...
00:10:23.35\00:10:24.69
I thing one of the
interesting thing is,
00:10:24.72\00:10:26.05
most interesting thing
when we met was that I was
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and I didn't care
00:10:28.42\00:10:29.76
and I was having
an ideally crisis,
00:10:29.79\00:10:31.39
I knew that God wanted me to go
to study theology, I don't why.
00:10:31.43\00:10:35.10
And at the same time she
had kind of always grew up,
00:10:35.13\00:10:36.63
people telling her she is
gonna be a pastor's wife...
00:10:36.67\00:10:38.00
Yes.
00:10:38.03\00:10:39.37
So we had that conversation
eventually on a phone,
00:10:39.40\00:10:41.20
it was one of those,
ah-ah kind of moment.
00:10:41.24\00:10:43.00
Right.
00:10:43.04\00:10:44.37
And so... That was hard.
00:10:44.41\00:10:45.74
Yeah, that's something
00:10:45.77\00:10:47.11
that we really need to
talk about as well, a good one.
00:10:47.14\00:10:48.48
I wanna ask you next about,
what's was most romantic thing
00:10:48.51\00:10:51.58
that you all had or had
done to you in the relationship?
00:10:51.61\00:10:56.08
Before that, I'll tell
you how me and I wife met.
00:10:56.12\00:10:58.49
So you can have
time to thing about that.
00:10:58.52\00:10:59.85
Yeah.
00:10:59.89\00:11:01.49
Me and wife, we met the most
Adventist best way possible,
00:11:01.52\00:11:06.36
I'm sorry, guys.
00:11:06.39\00:11:07.80
We met at a potluck.
00:11:07.83\00:11:11.10
So it was the best
place, a potluck, you know,
00:11:11.13\00:11:12.73
good place to meet.
00:11:12.77\00:11:14.10
But we were in the seminary.
Well, I was in the seminary.
00:11:14.14\00:11:17.34
She was at Andrews
in the graduate program.
00:11:17.37\00:11:20.18
And I actually thought
she was undergrad as well.
00:11:20.21\00:11:22.54
And I know, I saw her
and quickly we locked eyes,
00:11:22.58\00:11:27.92
found out later she actually,
00:11:27.95\00:11:29.42
well, I'm gonna say
the part two but anyway,
00:11:29.45\00:11:32.75
went up to her, you
know, I approached her,
00:11:32.79\00:11:34.36
you know, and
drop the good line,
00:11:34.39\00:11:36.39
of course, you know, I'm sure,
00:11:36.42\00:11:37.76
so she's not
here to counter this.
00:11:37.79\00:11:39.13
So it's great,
dropped a really good line,
00:11:39.16\00:11:40.76
I was so smooth, you know.
00:11:40.80\00:11:42.13
But we actually didn't
really exchange numbers
00:11:42.16\00:11:43.67
or anything then.
00:11:43.70\00:11:45.03
She actually left later.
00:11:45.07\00:11:46.40
I guess, my line was
so good and it was so swap
00:11:46.43\00:11:48.40
and whatnot that you know,
00:11:48.44\00:11:49.77
she end up adding
me on Facebook later
00:11:49.80\00:11:51.54
and that's kind of how
things progress from there.
00:11:51.57\00:11:55.54
But yeah, we had
a interesting meet,
00:11:55.58\00:11:57.78
you know, we got to
know each other a little bit
00:11:57.81\00:11:59.35
through social media.
00:11:59.38\00:12:01.28
And then we end up
going on a few dates
00:12:01.32\00:12:03.72
and progressing from there,
and one thing I love about her
00:12:03.75\00:12:07.46
and liked about her was that,
00:12:07.49\00:12:08.82
we connected with a
lot of things in common,
00:12:08.86\00:12:11.33
we were able to
communicate very well
00:12:11.36\00:12:14.03
and that was
something that I really,
00:12:14.06\00:12:15.40
you know, valued and also,
00:12:15.43\00:12:17.63
you know, she was really good,
she is a really good listener.
00:12:17.67\00:12:20.14
And as far because she
is a counselor by nature
00:12:20.17\00:12:22.84
but I definitely value that.
00:12:22.87\00:12:24.41
So that really
attracted me to her, you know.
00:12:24.44\00:12:27.64
So that's my story in short,
I'm sure she is like saying,
00:12:27.68\00:12:30.55
there's a lot more to it.
00:12:30.58\00:12:32.31
But let's hear from you, guys,
about the most romantic thing
00:12:32.35\00:12:35.15
that has been done to
you in this relationship.
00:12:35.18\00:12:41.36
I think I can go first. Okay.
00:12:41.39\00:12:43.83
I think the most romantic
thing that I can remember,
00:12:43.86\00:12:46.23
well, there's a
bunch of stuff he did
00:12:46.26\00:12:47.86
but if I had to go at the most.
00:12:47.90\00:12:50.27
I wasn't feeling well,
00:12:50.30\00:12:51.87
I was going through
one of those moments
00:12:51.90\00:12:53.23
of just feeling
down emotionally,
00:12:53.27\00:12:56.47
and I think I posted something
about am I good enough,
00:12:56.50\00:13:00.54
am I this, am I, something,
00:13:00.58\00:13:02.48
and all of a sudden he comes
00:13:02.51\00:13:03.88
with this huge
bouquet of flowers
00:13:03.91\00:13:06.98
just to say you are beautiful,
00:13:07.02\00:13:09.38
don't listen to
what other people say
00:13:09.42\00:13:11.32
yadda yadda yadda
00:13:11.35\00:13:12.69
and I was just like
"Oh, flowers and chocolates."
00:13:12.72\00:13:15.92
I'm not a flowers and
chocolate person but...
00:13:15.96\00:13:17.29
Yeah.
00:13:17.33\00:13:18.66
I don't like roses
but he did not bring roses
00:13:18.69\00:13:21.13
which made it even more...
00:13:21.16\00:13:22.50
Nice. All right.
00:13:22.53\00:13:23.87
Okay. I love those flowers.
00:13:23.90\00:13:27.04
I still remember
them too. This is nice.
00:13:27.07\00:13:32.17
All right, what about you, guys?
00:13:32.21\00:13:33.54
It's hard, no, it's
I'm pausing not because...
00:13:37.38\00:13:40.08
I'm just not
romantic. That was it is.
00:13:40.12\00:13:42.08
No, he is really good
about paying attention
00:13:42.12\00:13:45.09
to little things.
00:13:45.12\00:13:47.46
And I'm a, you know,
little things person,
00:13:47.49\00:13:49.62
detail person.
00:13:49.66\00:13:50.99
But I think the first
thing that came to mind,
00:13:51.03\00:13:53.09
I have, I don't know why
00:13:53.13\00:13:55.30
but I've always wanted
a chuppah at my wedding.
00:13:55.33\00:13:59.43
And that's, I don't
know, it's like a canopy
00:13:59.47\00:14:02.10
that in the Jewish religion
00:14:02.14\00:14:04.21
they get married
under the chuppah,
00:14:04.24\00:14:06.27
and I've always wanted one.
00:14:06.31\00:14:08.28
And somehow I told
Kory about this and he,
00:14:08.31\00:14:12.81
I'm telling you he
ordered, what is it?
00:14:12.85\00:14:16.15
Birchwood from Wyoming.
00:14:16.18\00:14:17.52
Birchwood and
all this other stuff
00:14:17.55\00:14:18.89
and I knew
nothing about this stuff
00:14:18.92\00:14:21.42
until the night I
think of the rehearsal.
00:14:21.46\00:14:25.29
No... Or maybe...
00:14:25.33\00:14:26.70
He kept hinting with my dad
00:14:26.73\00:14:28.70
about package
coming to the house.
00:14:28.73\00:14:31.00
I'm like, "What
package coming to the house..."
00:14:31.03\00:14:32.87
"And why are they
talking about package?"
00:14:32.90\00:14:34.44
Like, "What's happening here?"
00:14:34.47\00:14:35.90
So I'm trying to
put A and B together
00:14:35.94\00:14:37.94
with all these little
pieces of conversation
00:14:37.97\00:14:39.74
that I'm hearing and
I couldn't figure it out
00:14:39.77\00:14:41.71
until the night of the rehearsal
00:14:41.74\00:14:43.21
and he's there trying
to put it up from scratch.
00:14:43.24\00:14:46.65
This is not
something that you buy a kit
00:14:46.68\00:14:48.38
and you put it together.
00:14:48.42\00:14:49.75
No. Yes, he did. Yes, he did.
00:14:49.78\00:14:51.12
We went and we
bought material in Manhattan
00:14:51.15\00:14:55.76
and he worked the
night to put it up,
00:14:55.79\00:14:58.66
he and my dad
and some other men.
00:14:58.69\00:15:00.96
And the funny thing is...
00:15:01.00\00:15:02.33
I helped a
little. And you did help.
00:15:02.36\00:15:03.77
The funny thing is
it was not going up...
00:15:03.80\00:15:05.90
Yeah.
00:15:05.93\00:15:07.27
And I saw the stress on his face
00:15:07.30\00:15:09.70
and everybody kept saying,
00:15:09.74\00:15:11.07
"Well, it's okay, you can stop."
00:15:11.11\00:15:12.94
But I knew he
was not going to stop
00:15:12.97\00:15:14.68
until that thing was up.
00:15:14.71\00:15:16.28
And we ended the rehearsal
00:15:16.31\00:15:18.91
and I hear that
morning or something...
00:15:18.95\00:15:22.85
I got up early
and went to the church
00:15:22.88\00:15:25.22
and pretty much
tried to finish it.
00:15:25.25\00:15:27.32
Yeah, and all I
know is when I walked in,
00:15:27.36\00:15:30.19
my chuppah was there and
it was amazingly beautiful.
00:15:30.23\00:15:32.06
That is nice. That is so sweat.
00:15:32.09\00:15:33.63
Yeah. That's good, it's good.
00:15:33.66\00:15:35.13
All right, well, hey,
y'all, doing some big things,
00:15:35.16\00:15:37.60
I don't know if I
have anything to top those.
00:15:37.63\00:15:40.74
I'm gonna ask you all
next about the proposal
00:15:40.77\00:15:44.07
and then what you thought about
actually getting married, okay?
00:15:44.11\00:15:46.98
Now so then I'm, and
I have to share mine.
00:15:47.01\00:15:48.78
Okay, the most romantic
thing that my wife did for me,
00:15:48.81\00:15:52.38
so it really kind of
maybe small to some people
00:15:52.41\00:15:54.02
but she wrote down 50 things
00:15:54.05\00:15:57.29
that she liked or loved about me
00:15:57.32\00:15:59.02
and she gave it to me.
00:15:59.05\00:16:00.56
And I still have it
today and I still look at them
00:16:00.59\00:16:02.19
and they were
all very thoughtful,
00:16:02.22\00:16:04.03
very well
thought out and for me,
00:16:04.06\00:16:05.79
it was my love
language, so it was really nice.
00:16:05.83\00:16:07.70
No one ever done that for me,
00:16:07.73\00:16:09.06
no one ever thought too
much to ask like how I felt,
00:16:09.10\00:16:11.03
so that was something I
was thinking about today
00:16:11.07\00:16:13.40
and she still makes
a point to make sure
00:16:13.44\00:16:15.64
she is saying something positive
00:16:15.67\00:16:18.11
and nice about me.
00:16:18.14\00:16:19.47
And just that to me, it
makes me love her much more.
00:16:19.51\00:16:22.14
You know, I know.
00:16:22.18\00:16:24.81
Anyway and this
is getting kind of...
00:16:24.85\00:16:26.78
Message.
00:16:26.82\00:16:29.58
All right, so let's
talk about the engagement.
00:16:29.62\00:16:31.05
Now, okay, because that's really
00:16:31.09\00:16:33.22
when it get serious, you know...
00:16:33.25\00:16:35.32
Yeah.
00:16:35.36\00:16:36.69
Well, how did you
felt, how did you all take
00:16:36.73\00:16:38.06
or maybe we start
even how the proposal went,
00:16:38.09\00:16:39.46
but how do you react
to when you all knew,
00:16:39.49\00:16:41.80
hey, this is, we
need to get married?
00:16:41.83\00:16:43.87
I was nervous. I
hear you, brother.
00:16:43.90\00:16:46.17
And nervous is to
say at least I was like,
00:16:46.20\00:16:48.87
should I do it or should
I just run the other way.
00:16:48.90\00:16:51.17
I was scared. All right.
00:16:51.21\00:16:53.31
I was scared. Amen.
00:16:53.34\00:16:55.28
I was like, "Lord, help
me. Give me the courage."
00:16:55.31\00:16:58.11
It's just like the
whole thing would get in...
00:16:58.15\00:16:59.58
Yeah. I'm just
a little guy, man.
00:16:59.61\00:17:01.45
I don't know, you can tell them
you're take on, and go ahead,
00:17:04.59\00:17:07.42
you know, when they
got the rain, right?
00:17:07.46\00:17:10.09
I knew it's going
to happen the day...
00:17:10.13\00:17:12.93
I didn't know it days before
00:17:12.96\00:17:14.66
but one of our
friends kind of hinted to it.
00:17:14.70\00:17:19.97
Yeah, I think he read it
first, I'll call his name,
00:17:20.00\00:17:22.17
but I won't.
00:17:22.20\00:17:23.54
And he just started saying,
00:17:23.57\00:17:25.07
"Hmm, you guys
are going to Antigua."
00:17:25.11\00:17:27.14
Yes. "Where the
two shall become one."
00:17:27.18\00:17:29.71
I'm like, "What are
you're talking about?"
00:17:29.74\00:17:32.18
And then I saw at Xavier
and he was acting all nervous.
00:17:32.21\00:17:34.82
He was like, "Oh..."
00:17:34.85\00:17:38.69
So well...
00:17:38.72\00:17:40.06
So then how it happened was
00:17:40.09\00:17:41.42
he had to get
the special package
00:17:41.46\00:17:43.63
and he was coming back
and he kept on talking,
00:17:43.66\00:17:46.16
"Are you sure you love me?
00:17:46.19\00:17:47.60
Are you sure that..."
00:17:47.63\00:17:49.03
I knew he was
just extremely nervous
00:17:49.06\00:17:52.80
and then he brought out the ring
00:17:52.83\00:17:54.24
and with the ring,
00:17:54.27\00:17:55.80
that was actually
his mom's and dad's ring.
00:17:55.84\00:18:00.94
And it has so
much history behind it
00:18:00.98\00:18:03.95
and that's what he presented
and they even sent like
00:18:03.98\00:18:05.75
little letters behind it saying,
00:18:05.78\00:18:08.22
you know, you
are our daughter...
00:18:08.25\00:18:09.68
Wow.
00:18:09.72\00:18:11.05
And that, it was really,
really, yeah, I was like...
00:18:11.09\00:18:12.42
Wow, that's beautiful.
00:18:12.45\00:18:13.79
So how did you all
either know, one of you know
00:18:13.82\00:18:15.42
that the other one was
the one for you, you know,
00:18:15.46\00:18:17.26
was there like a moment
00:18:17.29\00:18:18.86
when God came through the clouds
00:18:18.89\00:18:20.23
and just told you,
how do you all know?
00:18:20.26\00:18:23.26
I think for me was,
like I said, I mean,
00:18:23.30\00:18:27.20
I know we have
through that areas
00:18:27.24\00:18:28.57
but one of my pivotal points was
00:18:28.60\00:18:30.81
I've never done this before.
00:18:30.84\00:18:32.17
You know, I've been in
relationships and everything
00:18:32.21\00:18:34.81
but I've never actually prayed
a silent prayer request to God
00:18:34.84\00:18:37.75
in reference to the right one.
00:18:37.78\00:18:39.98
You know, I was
working at a church at the time
00:18:40.02\00:18:42.58
that required security,
00:18:42.62\00:18:44.85
I don't know why I pick
for security for everything,
00:18:44.89\00:18:47.66
but I prayed and
I asked God, I said,
00:18:47.69\00:18:50.96
God, if you want me to get
to know this girl Brittany,
00:18:50.99\00:18:55.86
you know, not to date here
'cause I don't want to date.
00:18:55.90\00:18:58.07
Whoever you have
for me I wanna know them
00:18:58.10\00:19:00.07
because that's
you want me to marry.
00:19:00.10\00:19:02.34
And my best friend, he was like,
00:19:02.37\00:19:04.07
he told me to just say a prayer
00:19:04.11\00:19:05.44
that don't tell
anybody else about it.
00:19:05.47\00:19:07.58
And I prayed and I asked God
that he's going to put it there
00:19:07.61\00:19:09.34
at the church
00:19:09.38\00:19:10.71
that she would never go to work,
00:19:10.75\00:19:12.81
not to visit but to work
00:19:12.85\00:19:14.18
and a couple Sabbaths
later I saw the back of her head
00:19:14.22\00:19:17.05
and I was like, I
looked up by the sky,
00:19:17.09\00:19:19.19
I was like, "Cool, man."
00:19:19.22\00:19:21.62
Because now I had to do my part.
00:19:21.66\00:19:22.99
Yeah, yeah.
00:19:23.02\00:19:24.36
He promised, He kept
His end of the bargain,
00:19:24.39\00:19:25.73
I had to keep my
end of the bargain.
00:19:25.76\00:19:27.10
Yeah, amen. I like that.
00:19:27.13\00:19:29.30
Well, for me, I think it
was in a counseling lesson.
00:19:29.33\00:19:35.37
Counseling session, sorry,
where I was just sitting down
00:19:35.40\00:19:37.74
and I was talking to
the counselor about Xavier,
00:19:37.77\00:19:40.18
he was like, "Hmm that is
the most balanced perspective
00:19:40.21\00:19:43.55
I've ever heard about a person."
00:19:43.58\00:19:45.48
And I was like, "Hmm
that does make sense."
00:19:45.51\00:19:49.95
And I think it was
also when I had told him,
00:19:49.98\00:19:52.92
I hate you and
instead of storming off,
00:19:52.95\00:19:56.32
he sat down
beside me and he held me.
00:19:56.36\00:19:58.73
He said, "You
have never been loved
00:19:58.76\00:20:02.16
then I'm going to be here
to help you in this process."
00:20:02.20\00:20:04.07
Wow. That's powerful. Mercy.
00:20:04.10\00:20:05.97
And that was just, yeah...
00:20:06.00\00:20:07.87
That's the moment.
00:20:07.90\00:20:09.70
Yeah, yeah, that's beautiful.
00:20:09.74\00:20:11.61
All right, Douglas, so
let's have you all share
00:20:11.64\00:20:12.97
about engagement little bit
00:20:13.01\00:20:14.34
and how you all knew
each other with the one?
00:20:14.38\00:20:16.14
I'm the designated
engagement storyteller.
00:20:16.18\00:20:17.71
All right.
00:20:17.75\00:20:19.08
So our situation
was different as well
00:20:19.11\00:20:22.68
because we weren't
dating when we got engaged.
00:20:22.72\00:20:26.65
Matter of fact, I'll
just, you know, be honest
00:20:26.69\00:20:28.16
and it's probably
good for me to be honest.
00:20:28.19\00:20:29.89
Well, it is good
for me to be honest.
00:20:29.92\00:20:31.26
Yeah, that's true.
00:20:31.29\00:20:33.56
I was actually dating somebody,
I was dating somebody else.
00:20:33.60\00:20:36.43
Well, I'm not
really dating them,
00:20:36.46\00:20:37.80
we weren't like
officially dating
00:20:37.83\00:20:39.17
but I was getting
to know someone else
00:20:39.20\00:20:40.54
and I had actually been
praying about that person
00:20:40.57\00:20:42.80
because, you know,
we had grown closer
00:20:42.84\00:20:45.61
and that person
was real gung-ho.
00:20:45.64\00:20:46.98
You know, like
from the time we met,
00:20:47.01\00:20:48.34
she was like "Oh, my goodness,
00:20:48.38\00:20:49.71
when we're going
to be get married."
00:20:49.74\00:20:51.08
Sounds like...
00:20:51.11\00:20:52.45
At first, but then I
started praying about it
00:20:52.48\00:20:53.82
and it's actually
praying about that person
00:20:53.85\00:20:55.18
I got answer to
my prayer with Kim.
00:20:55.22\00:20:57.25
So it was very
weird but, you know,
00:20:57.29\00:20:59.99
I've kinda learn not
to disregard, you know,
00:21:00.02\00:21:02.92
when God says to do something.
00:21:02.96\00:21:04.39
Yeah.
00:21:04.43\00:21:05.76
We went to South
Africa on a trip,
00:21:05.79\00:21:07.13
we ended up on a trip
together to South Africa.
00:21:07.16\00:21:09.50
It was a mission
trip and while on the trip
00:21:09.53\00:21:12.60
that's when God
started answering the prayer.
00:21:12.63\00:21:14.50
I mean, He just
started saying something to me.
00:21:14.54\00:21:16.27
It was like almost I
could hear Him talking like,
00:21:16.30\00:21:17.97
"Okay, Kory, I don't know
00:21:18.01\00:21:19.34
how much more
clear I can make this..."
00:21:19.37\00:21:20.71
Yeah,
00:21:20.74\00:21:22.08
"You know, but this
is what you need to do."
00:21:22.11\00:21:23.45
And I'm just like, you know,
we do had history, you know,
00:21:23.48\00:21:26.51
we had dated
for about four years
00:21:26.55\00:21:28.62
before we finally
broke up the first time,
00:21:28.65\00:21:30.52
we went back and
forth, so I'm kind of like,
00:21:30.55\00:21:32.19
"God, I really don't
wanna go through that again."
00:21:32.22\00:21:34.82
But at the same time
the more and more, you know,
00:21:34.86\00:21:37.66
He revealed to me, the
more and more just became clear.
00:21:37.69\00:21:39.96
And so we were in this
diamond shop in South Africa
00:21:40.00\00:21:44.83
and in the shop they also
had some tanzanite diamond,
00:21:44.87\00:21:47.50
you know, rings whatever.
00:21:47.54\00:21:48.87
And she was in there parading
around a ring on her finger
00:21:48.90\00:21:51.11
and it's kind of interesting...
00:21:51.14\00:21:52.47
I had no clue
he was watching me.
00:21:52.51\00:21:53.84
Because she didn't
know I was watching her,
00:21:53.88\00:21:55.21
you know and as soon as
we got back to the States.
00:21:55.24\00:21:59.71
I went to a jewelry store
and I said this is what I want
00:21:59.75\00:22:04.89
and they were
like, we don't have it.
00:22:04.92\00:22:06.25
And I was like,
"Well, you're gonna get it?"
00:22:06.29\00:22:07.62
And, you know, I
picked stuff out,
00:22:07.66\00:22:09.26
you know, I
basically had it made
00:22:09.29\00:22:11.89
and they sent it and I believe
00:22:11.93\00:22:13.90
I was invited to a
friend of mine's wedding,
00:22:13.93\00:22:16.26
Pastor Joshua
Nelson, we'll discover later
00:22:16.30\00:22:19.30
and I asked her to come with me,
00:22:19.33\00:22:21.34
and the day after the wedding
00:22:21.37\00:22:24.27
we went on a nice
tour of Manhattan,
00:22:24.31\00:22:26.17
we was just hanging out
00:22:26.21\00:22:27.54
and I kept on this something
I had to talk to you about,
00:22:27.58\00:22:28.94
something I had
to talk to you about.
00:22:28.98\00:22:30.31
So she is nervous, she
didn't know what to expect,
00:22:30.35\00:22:33.11
we have been
around in circles before.
00:22:33.15\00:22:34.95
So she is thinking,
00:22:34.98\00:22:36.35
he's probably
gonna break it off,
00:22:36.38\00:22:37.75
you know, and
I'm such a bad person
00:22:37.79\00:22:40.36
'cause we walked and we walked
across the Brooklyn Bridge,
00:22:40.39\00:22:43.02
we got to the middle
and I said to her, you know,
00:22:43.06\00:22:45.49
we've been through this before
00:22:45.53\00:22:46.86
and, you know,
things haven't worked out,
00:22:46.90\00:22:48.96
so she is like, "Oh,
God, shall we go, this is it."
00:22:49.00\00:22:51.20
And then eventually,
I just pull out a ring,
00:22:51.23\00:22:52.73
it was like, you
know, the only other option,
00:22:52.77\00:22:55.20
you know is, you
know, "Will you marry me?"
00:22:55.24\00:22:56.81
And she, you know, she
sobbed for a little while,
00:22:56.84\00:23:00.91
she snorted for
a little while...
00:23:00.94\00:23:03.08
You really said that on TV?
00:23:03.11\00:23:05.48
So she looked
absolutely wonderful
00:23:05.51\00:23:06.85
after I asked her.
00:23:06.88\00:23:08.22
Keep it going.
00:23:08.25\00:23:09.58
And she kind of asked me
if I was serious a few times.
00:23:09.62\00:23:12.35
And then she finally said
yes and I'm not going to lie,
00:23:12.39\00:23:15.36
it was like a cloud was lifted,
00:23:15.39\00:23:18.99
you know, because before
that I didn't know, you know,
00:23:19.03\00:23:22.33
and so God made it
plain what I think.
00:23:22.36\00:23:24.63
So that's kind of
also with how you knew
00:23:24.67\00:23:26.33
and how you had the proposal.
00:23:26.37\00:23:28.40
And how did you know that
you should say yes to Kory?
00:23:28.44\00:23:32.54
Oh, man.
00:23:32.57\00:23:33.94
And this is
where story gets weird.
00:23:33.98\00:23:35.68
It's one of those
things that you pray about
00:23:40.42\00:23:42.38
or that I pray about,
00:23:42.42\00:23:44.45
and I think this was what 2013,
00:23:44.49\00:23:50.16
so about three years
prior, we're not dating,
00:23:50.19\00:23:52.49
we're not talking, I don't know
00:23:52.53\00:23:53.96
if he's literally dead or alive.
00:23:54.00\00:23:57.77
And in the middle of the night,
00:23:57.80\00:23:59.53
it's like 2 or 3 o'clock
in the morning one night,
00:23:59.57\00:24:03.00
I wake up and God is
like, "Get a pen and paper."
00:24:03.04\00:24:05.57
Wow.
00:24:05.61\00:24:07.31
And I'm like, get pen and paper,
00:24:07.34\00:24:08.78
I'm sleeping, "Okay, Lord."
00:24:08.81\00:24:10.15
Sleep, jumps pen and paper
00:24:10.18\00:24:12.25
what am I getting
pen and paper for.
00:24:12.28\00:24:14.32
And he is like start
writing a letter to Kory
00:24:14.35\00:24:18.45
because it's him.
00:24:18.49\00:24:20.66
Wow. She is so sick.
00:24:20.69\00:24:22.12
And I know it
makes me sound crazy
00:24:22.16\00:24:25.29
but it's what happened.
00:24:25.33\00:24:27.36
That's what happened, wow.
00:24:27.40\00:24:28.73
So on my wedding day,
I'm reading her letter
00:24:28.76\00:24:32.43
that was written like
three years earlier...
00:24:32.47\00:24:34.04
This is not, I'm not
crying, I'm rubbing my eye.
00:24:34.07\00:24:36.34
It's' all right,
Kory, it's all right.
00:24:36.37\00:24:37.77
I'm reading a
letter on my wedding date
00:24:37.81\00:24:39.31
that was written like
three years earlier dated
00:24:39.34\00:24:41.54
like October I believe...
00:24:41.58\00:24:42.91
October 10th.
October 10th, 2011.
00:24:42.94\00:24:47.58
Well, 2010... '10.
00:24:47.62\00:24:49.65
And it saying
it's our wedding day.
00:24:49.68\00:24:52.55
And I'm like, "What
is happening right now?"
00:24:52.59\00:24:55.69
You know, but sometimes
we talk about relationships
00:24:55.72\00:24:58.86
and, you know, I really
wish we can leave a principle.
00:24:58.89\00:25:01.20
I don't wanna
people to look like,
00:25:01.23\00:25:02.56
"Oh, what a beautiful story."
00:25:02.60\00:25:03.93
We talk about relationships
and people always talk about
00:25:03.97\00:25:05.77
oh, the right one and, you know,
00:25:05.80\00:25:07.57
and making different decisions
00:25:07.60\00:25:08.94
and trying this
on, trying that on.
00:25:08.97\00:25:11.57
You know, there
really is a trusting in God
00:25:11.61\00:25:15.74
to show aspect.
00:25:15.78\00:25:17.11
Amen. Yeah, yeah.
00:25:17.15\00:25:18.48
And not even aspect,
there is really just the story.
00:25:18.51\00:25:20.82
You know, that God
really does speak, you know,
00:25:20.85\00:25:24.05
and if anything else
our relationship to me
00:25:24.09\00:25:26.35
has proved that
God exists, you know.
00:25:26.39\00:25:27.99
Yeah. Amen. That's powerful.
00:25:28.02\00:25:29.99
Well, that's
beautiful, you know,
00:25:30.03\00:25:31.36
and I definitely had a
moment, an ah-ah moment
00:25:31.39\00:25:35.56
when I felt like
God was speaking to me
00:25:35.60\00:25:36.97
and saying this was the
one I should be with, you know.
00:25:37.00\00:25:40.80
Our story is little
bit different as well,
00:25:40.84\00:25:42.34
you know, we were, you
know, and I used to going,
00:25:42.37\00:25:44.17
I was used to dating the people,
00:25:44.21\00:25:45.54
I don't want this
to be the same thing,
00:25:45.57\00:25:46.91
I want to be
different, you know,
00:25:46.94\00:25:48.28
and there are some
various things that
00:25:48.31\00:25:49.64
my wife now did that was,
00:25:49.68\00:25:52.15
that showed me
that she was different.
00:25:52.18\00:25:54.05
You know, something
she didn't allow me to do,
00:25:54.08\00:25:56.05
you know, didn't let
me do in the relationship
00:25:56.08\00:25:58.05
that taught me
that she was different.
00:25:58.09\00:26:00.09
And the main thing that really
kind of brought us together was
00:26:00.12\00:26:02.22
when it was time
for us to end school,
00:26:02.26\00:26:06.56
she ended first
and she went back home.
00:26:06.59\00:26:08.66
And of course, I was
gonna end few months later
00:26:08.70\00:26:12.67
and I was looking
for the conference
00:26:12.70\00:26:14.04
to let me know
where I'd be placed.
00:26:14.07\00:26:15.40
And of course, I'm in
the South Atlantic Conference
00:26:15.44\00:26:17.01
I knew that at
least I'll be placed
00:26:17.04\00:26:18.37
in Georgia, South
Carolina, or North Carolina.
00:26:18.41\00:26:20.94
I didn't know which one.
00:26:20.98\00:26:22.74
She was trying to
relocate down South as well
00:26:22.78\00:26:25.08
but she wasn't sure
exactly where to go.
00:26:25.11\00:26:27.32
And she just
prayed, we both just prayed
00:26:27.35\00:26:28.68
and said, "God, if you
want us to be together forever,
00:26:28.72\00:26:31.19
put us some place
close because we ain't doing
00:26:31.22\00:26:32.99
a long distance
relationship thing."
00:26:33.02\00:26:34.76
So we prayed,
00:26:34.79\00:26:36.29
she ended up
getting a job in a place
00:26:36.32\00:26:37.96
called Camden, South Carolina.
00:26:37.99\00:26:39.66
She got it first, she by faith,
she went down there and said,
00:26:39.69\00:26:42.06
I'm gonna move there
and she ended up going.
00:26:42.10\00:26:44.13
And so maybe a
month later I got word
00:26:44.17\00:26:47.90
that I was actually gonna
be going to pastor in a city
00:26:47.94\00:26:52.17
that was literally
45 minutes away from
00:26:52.21\00:26:54.51
where she ended being.
00:26:54.54\00:26:55.94
And so we were like,
"Wow, God, you're so good."
00:26:55.98\00:26:57.65
All the places down south
where she could have been,
00:26:57.68\00:27:00.02
you knew before
where I was gonna be placed
00:27:00.05\00:27:01.98
and He put us close together.
00:27:02.02\00:27:03.35
And that kind of started us
on a journey of really getting
00:27:03.39\00:27:05.35
to know each other.
00:27:05.39\00:27:06.72
And it will help the church
kind of transition to know
00:27:06.76\00:27:08.19
who we were as a couple.
00:27:08.22\00:27:09.99
And it's been a
journey, I'll tell you,
00:27:10.03\00:27:11.36
it's been a
journey for both of us
00:27:11.39\00:27:12.99
and I know that you
even as pastor's wife,
00:27:13.03\00:27:14.56
you know, it been a
little while for us now
00:27:14.60\00:27:16.33
and she is been
able to transition.
00:27:16.36\00:27:18.20
But I'll tell you this,
marriage is a beautiful thing
00:27:18.23\00:27:21.60
and a lot of people feel
00:27:21.64\00:27:23.37
and maybe those
even viewing this
00:27:23.41\00:27:25.61
will say, you know, what?
00:27:25.64\00:27:27.08
That was, all the
story sound great,
00:27:27.11\00:27:28.78
but I don't know if it
ever gonna happen for me.
00:27:28.81\00:27:31.21
And I believe that
God has a special plan
00:27:31.25\00:27:33.68
for each and every one of us.
00:27:33.72\00:27:35.05
And He has
everybody on a special track.
00:27:35.08\00:27:36.72
And so keep trusting in God
00:27:36.75\00:27:38.42
and look for that
ideal relationship
00:27:38.45\00:27:40.29
because God has a special plan
00:27:40.32\00:27:42.46
just for you to find that person
00:27:42.49\00:27:44.53
that God has ordained for you.
00:27:44.56\00:27:46.06
I don't think it
could happen really,
00:27:46.09\00:27:47.83
but God directed
when I least expected it.
00:27:47.86\00:27:50.53
God brought me
00:27:50.57\00:27:52.07
my beautiful
flower Kimberley Nelson.
00:27:52.10\00:27:54.47
I love her so much
and I'm so happy for that.
00:27:54.50\00:27:56.64
But this is where we
have to draw the line.
00:27:56.67\00:27:58.54
At the end of the day everyone,
remember to make pure choices.
00:27:58.57\00:28:01.34
God bless.
00:28:01.38\00:28:02.71