The following program
discusses sensitive issues.
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Parents are
cautioned that some material
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may be too candid
for younger children.
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Hello, and
welcome to Pure Choices.
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I'm your host
Pastor Joshua Nelson,
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and we have
another good one for you.
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Today, we're talking
about the hip-hop of sex.
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And before we
get into our subject
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and topic today, I want
to introduce our panel again.
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To my left, I have
Pastor Marquis Jackson
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who is the pastor
in South Carolina,
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Sumter and Manning district.
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We also have over
here, Miss Kimberly Pearson
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who is the assistant
chaplain at Oakwood University.
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We also have Pastor Kory Douglas
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who is the pastor
over there at Grand Avenue
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and New Life Fellowship
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which is in the
Central States Conference,
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I believe. Yes, sir.
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And we also have our professor,
we call him Kean Baxter,
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who is our recent MDiv
graduate from the seminary.
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And so we just
want to talk about
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this important topic today,
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talking about the hip-hop of sex
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and really wanting to figure out
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what has the
society or media done
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to give us an image
about sex or sexuality today.
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And basically,
really what I want to ask
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first is looking
at the past, okay,
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and how things
were in the society,
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in the media,
has anything changed?
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And if so, what has changed?
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I want to say, it has changed.
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It's just a level of
it's been available or open.
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There'd be songs,
you know, back in,
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you know, our
parents or grandparents' days
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that may give suggestions
of sexual implications
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but they are very mass encoded.
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Now we're living in a society
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where everything is
just all up in your face
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and it's just even into
tenth and eleventh degree
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and all that stuff.
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So it's not as much of a
code, it's just blatantly,
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overtly in your face.
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Okay, would you
all agree with that?
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I would agree but I would add.
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So I think that a
lot has actually changed,
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you know, media...
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And I would even go beyond sex.
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I mean,
definitely sex has become
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more prevalent on television
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but I was watching
television the other day,
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and I'm starting to
realize that now more and more
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has become more acceptable
to even curse on television.
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And I'm not talking about cable,
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talking about, you know,
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primetime,
regular public access,
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public network television,
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people are going
to say an A word,
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and now they're
saying the B word.
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I mean, they're just
saying like it's nothing.
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And the same thing
can be said of sex,
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you know, at
first, it was you know
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just a little
skin here and there,
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and as we've grown on,
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it's almost like watching pornos
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on network television.
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And that really
what's being said now
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is that's just a
part of who we are,
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you know, we should just
be proud of our sexuality,
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we should flaunt it,
it's a celebration of art
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is often what said, you
know, so is that a problem?
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Well, I think that, you know,
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what hip-hop and media,
it's powerful, it's powerful.
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It has the means to
put a lot of information
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to a lot of people, you
know, in lots of different ways
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but the danger in that is
that we become over stimulated
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by the thing that
we see, so I can go,
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leave my house on a billboard.
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I see four billboards that
have a sexy body, a sexy figure,
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then I get to the grocery store,
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and then as I'm
walking down the aisle,
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I think of all the
commercials I've seen
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where somebody was
doing something sexual
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to advertise something I want.
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Then I get in the checkout
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and now there's
20 magazines with,
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you know, famous
people doing things
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and this one is pregnant
and oh, there is a scandal.
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And so I learn how to
relate to people sexually.
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I learn about
what is appropriate,
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and what people like
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from all these
different forms of media.
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And there's no filter to come in
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and combat these
images I'm being given.
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Right, and really
even if you try to say
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something against
that you looked at it as,
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okay, you're all
too conservative,
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you're just you
know you're just weird,
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whatever the case may be.
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Yeah, yeah.
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I was going to
say, the boundaries
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are definitely being pushed.
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And, you know, understanding
the great controversy
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between Christ and Satan.
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And we realize that
the devil has an agenda
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and it's not only in media,
it's in movies like we say.
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The curse words, the
nudity, sexual content,
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the music as well
have least sexual content.
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One of the dangerous
thing about music is that
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how it influences the mind,
it bypasses the logical filter
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and go straight
to the emotional bit.
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So you can be affected by
music and not even realize it.
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The other thing I want
to throw in is the clothing.
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Especially...
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Well, I don't know
if it's especially,
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you know, I could
say women's clothes
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but even
nowadays, men's clothes are,
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they're becoming
tighter, more revealing
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especially with
the homosexuality
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becoming
mainstream and, you know,
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men's dresses kind of
starting to change as well
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and becoming more sexual.
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But I think what it
does if you look at,
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you know what
hip-hop does, sometimes is,
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it changes the terminology
in how we relate to each other.
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So you know in music,
you may hear someone saying,
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"Oh, you know, she's a B."
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Or she's this or she's
that and everybody's dancing to
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and everybody loves it but then,
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if you call me by that,
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I have a problem
with you, it's bad.
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Or now, you know,
now a lot of women,
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if a man calls a woman
out of her name, it's bad.
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But if we call ourselves a
name and put bad in front of it,
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I'm a bad, you
know, B or whatever,
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then it's a good thing.
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Now it means I'm
sexy, now it means,
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you know, I've got respect.
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And so that
comes out of a culture
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where we're being
kind of brainwashed.
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Brainwashed, yeah.
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We're being brainwashed
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and it's
developing into that society.
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I just wanted to
add a little bit to that
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as well earlier is that
when you look in the Bible,
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Cain killed his
brother Abel, and God was,
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you know, going to
bring punishment to him
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seven fold to someone
who's going to kill Cain.
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But later on, Lamech has a son,
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Lamech is going to
kill someone, I'm sorry,
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he's going to kill
someone and he say,
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"Well, if Cain was
avenger would have been...
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Who killed Cain seven fold,
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who ever kill Lamech
will be seventy seven fold.
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So there is aggression,
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arise of the fall of moral base,
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but there's always
has been that situation.
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It just says we continue
go on, it has developed more,
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and the devil
knows his time is short,
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and he's just
going to go straight
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for the maximum pushing to
see how far people will go.
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Yeah, I mean, and
that's a good point
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because, you know,
look at Sodom and Gomorrah,
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I mean, different
places in the Bible.
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And these
places were pretty bad,
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you know, so I
think there always
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it's every
generation has that point
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where it just
becomes just so overt,
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you know, the state
always pushing the agenda.
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It's always someone
who's going to be there
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trying to bring it back
to where it supposed to be,
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but Satan always
comes back, he says, "No.
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Let's take it
away from God's hands."
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And then the people
who try to bring it back
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to conservative
look at as fanatic,
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you know, and uses
that as well, you know.
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I was going to ask a question.
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How does seeing all
these sexual images,
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like he says,
proliferated in movies,
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network TV,
magazines, everything, music,
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how does it affect us?
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What is the desired effect
that the enemy is going for?
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Okay, so let's
talk about that then.
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Let's talk, he's
brought the movies thing,
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and the TV thing,
so let's talk about it.
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I mean, we're
trying to be as practical
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as we can on this
show, on this program,
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so we want to really
tackle and answer the question,
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what is okay to watch on TV,
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and what is okay to
watch in the movies?
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Should I watch
the R rated movie?
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Should I just keep to
PG13, because they have
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you know this amount of
clothes on, so it's okay?
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Should I say I
shouldn't watch this TV show?
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Should I close my eyes
here in the commercials?
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What, you know...
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You know, one of
the interesting things
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and I was gonna say
this a little bit earlier
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one of the interesting things
about hip-hop specifically
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is that what you get now
more and more of is music videos
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more than
anything else, you know,
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we were growing up listening to,
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you know, hip-hop,
rap whatever it meant,
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you know, listen to the radio.
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And there wasn't
many images to put
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to what you were
hearing, you know,
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but nowadays,
like he was saying,
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now we have to
contend with the fact that
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these messages are now being
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brought to life
on the big screen.
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You know, not only
do we have the music
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that's calling
women out their names,
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presented them
as animals to be had
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but it's also showing guys
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actually in the
act of having them,
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you know what I'm saying?
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Showing, children
seems that they should have
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no business seeing
such as a music video shot
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in strip clubs, shot in clubs,
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you know, and shot
in all kind of places
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that you don't want
a 12 year old to know
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what a strip club
looks like on the inside
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but that's what is
shown in music videos.
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I mean just the
imagery, you know.
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And the thing is, it
would be one thing to say,
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"Let's try to
block out the music,"
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but now you got to block
out the music and the imagery.
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Yeah, and so now they're
trying to emulate these things
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that they're seeing,
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and this becomes cool, you know.
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It's invasive.
Yeah, it really is.
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But still, you all
trying to get away from me.
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What are some things we
should or should not watch?
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I mean, what
should be the basis,
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what should be, you know...
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You know, what I think
is interesting is that,
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you know, a lot of
times, we try to prettify,
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make nice things that
are comfortable for us.
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So I'm not going
to go to the movies
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and watch a movie
where somebody is,
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you know, having sex
openly with somebody else
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but I'm going to
get it from Redbox,
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and bring it, and
watch it in my house
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so that I can watch
it and I'll fast forward
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through the other scenes,
you know, and lot of times,
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we're just not keeping
it real with ourselves about
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what we can handle
and what we can't handle.
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You know, if I am, you know,
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in the middle of a breakup,
women do it all the time.
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You're in the middle of a break,
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you're in the middle of
a relationship situation,
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so you go and watch the saddest,
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most emotional
movies you could think of,
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and you're
crying and it feeds into
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how you're already feeling
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as opposed to
making you feel better.
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And so I think sometimes,
we use movies and television
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to maybe feed into
either things we want to do
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but can't do or,
you know, we feed into
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maybe our own kind of emotions
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and you know,
self gratification.
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So are we sayings then
that we shouldn't watch anything
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that has someone
having sex on screen?
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I have a confession.
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I struggle a lot,
I like to eat candy,
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and my problem is when
I eat one piece of candy,
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it's hard to
put that candy away,
00:11:22.94\00:11:25.08
and so I eat more
candy, and I eat more candy
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till the whole case is over.
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Well, I was just going
to eat maybe piece or two,
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the whole box is gone.
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In my situation, if I
find myself watching television
00:11:32.52\00:11:34.96
that has those
kind of implications,
00:11:34.99\00:11:37.13
I'm going to find
myself watching that
00:11:37.16\00:11:39.06
and then adding
a little bit more,
00:11:39.09\00:11:40.56
and watching a little bit more
00:11:40.60\00:11:41.93
and maybe even
being to another case
00:11:41.96\00:11:44.13
that if no one
sees me watching this,
00:11:44.17\00:11:46.13
then I'm going to
definitely watch this
00:11:46.17\00:11:47.50
and then something more.
00:11:47.54\00:11:48.87
And so, I guess
the danger in that
00:11:48.90\00:11:51.01
is if you watch
those kind of shows,
00:11:51.04\00:11:53.41
it's going to automatically
prod you to do even more.
00:11:53.44\00:11:56.75
And so, if I'm going to speak,
I will speak in a principle.
00:11:56.78\00:12:00.55
Whatever you find
yourself watching,
00:12:00.58\00:12:02.62
the devil's going
to try to find a way
00:12:02.65\00:12:04.02
to make it even
more and built more.
00:12:04.05\00:12:06.89
I'm gonna challenge with
that, I'm gonna let Kean speak,
00:12:06.92\00:12:08.96
but someone is gonna say to you,
00:12:08.99\00:12:10.33
"Well, you know, I
don't have that problem.
00:12:10.36\00:12:12.39
I can just watch it, you
know, I don't get affected.
00:12:12.43\00:12:14.80
I can just watch
it and it is good."
00:12:14.83\00:12:16.36
So I'm also going
to go a little deeper
00:12:16.40\00:12:18.30
and say "Well, is it even right
for us to look at something
00:12:18.33\00:12:21.77
that may be considered
say, adultery in God's eyes?"
00:12:21.80\00:12:25.87
You're right.
00:12:25.91\00:12:27.24
It's a slippery slope,
A, but we also have to ask
00:12:27.28\00:12:30.38
is how it's affecting us
00:12:30.41\00:12:32.48
and even if we don't
think it's affecting us,
00:12:32.51\00:12:35.65
are we being
honest with ourselves.
00:12:35.68\00:12:37.55
Can we look at something
00:12:37.59\00:12:38.92
and it not affect
you on some level?
00:12:38.95\00:12:41.99
And I would suggest
that watching sex on TV
00:12:42.02\00:12:46.70
whether it's
adultery or it's between
00:12:46.73\00:12:49.13
husband and wife,
00:12:49.16\00:12:51.60
it's doing a couple of things
00:12:51.63\00:12:53.30
that I can
think of right now is,
00:12:53.34\00:12:55.44
one is exciting you,
and if you're not married,
00:12:55.47\00:12:58.54
what are you going to do
00:12:58.57\00:12:59.91
with those
feelings that aroused.
00:12:59.94\00:13:02.74
The next thing is
also desensitizing you
00:13:02.78\00:13:05.41
because we're not
made to watch sex on TV.
00:13:05.45\00:13:10.92
So when you continue to do this,
00:13:10.95\00:13:14.69
it's actually perverting you.
00:13:14.72\00:13:16.52
So when you get into
a marriage relationship,
00:13:16.56\00:13:19.83
you're going to
have difficulties
00:13:19.86\00:13:21.50
because your sexual experiences
00:13:21.53\00:13:23.63
has not been with an
actual person in the flesh,
00:13:23.67\00:13:29.37
so there's going to
be some trouble there.
00:13:29.40\00:13:31.64
Okay, well, some would
say it's just real life,
00:13:31.67\00:13:34.74
you know, that
it's just real life.
00:13:34.78\00:13:36.11
It's just what happens in life
and this is what we're just,
00:13:36.14\00:13:38.81
you know, video
movies, it's all fake,
00:13:38.85\00:13:40.75
it's to make
believe, it's just what...
00:13:40.78\00:13:42.12
we're just seeing, you know.
00:13:42.15\00:13:43.49
TV is not real life though.
It's depicting real life.
00:13:43.52\00:13:46.25
Well, there is
reality television now, too.
00:13:46.29\00:13:47.62
It is. Is it
reality television real?
00:13:47.66\00:13:49.86
I think what
reality television is, A,
00:13:49.89\00:13:54.26
I guess, it's made
to portray real life.
00:13:54.30\00:13:57.83
It's real life in
contained situations.
00:13:57.87\00:14:01.80
But here is a
thing, media is a tool,
00:14:01.84\00:14:04.67
the TV and music are tools.
00:14:04.71\00:14:07.11
Now what you use to make with
those tools are different like,
00:14:07.14\00:14:10.21
we all grew up
singing the Bible songs.
00:14:10.25\00:14:12.51
I know the books of the
Bible because of a song.
00:14:12.55\00:14:15.62
You know, I have learned
00:14:15.65\00:14:17.89
all kinds of Bible
stories by watching,
00:14:17.92\00:14:20.96
you know, movies or watching TV,
00:14:20.99\00:14:22.82
so there are tools.
00:14:22.86\00:14:24.49
The question is, how
are we using those tools?
00:14:24.53\00:14:27.50
It's a form of education.
00:14:27.53\00:14:29.26
And here is, there now
where the responsibility
00:14:29.30\00:14:31.83
of parents and
pastors, and the church comes in
00:14:31.87\00:14:34.74
is that, "Okay, we know
that media is being used
00:14:34.77\00:14:38.27
as a tool to teach
young people about sex,
00:14:38.31\00:14:41.84
about sexual relationships,
about all kinds of things.
00:14:41.88\00:14:45.51
Now how are we combating that?
00:14:45.55\00:14:47.38
Are we giving them
the proper information
00:14:47.42\00:14:49.95
that they're
seeing adultery on TV?
00:14:49.98\00:14:52.22
Are we talking to
them about adultery?
00:14:52.25\00:14:54.42
Are we sharing our
experiences with adultery
00:14:54.46\00:14:58.03
and how it's
affecting our families?
00:14:58.06\00:14:59.86
Are we letting TV and media
00:14:59.89\00:15:01.96
and music
videos be the educator?
00:15:02.00\00:15:03.93
Right, and that's why, you know,
00:15:03.97\00:15:06.74
programs like
this are so important,
00:15:06.77\00:15:08.10
you know, and we're
not of course bashing TV
00:15:08.14\00:15:09.70
because of course
you know we're on TV.
00:15:09.74\00:15:11.31
And this is really
what it should be about,
00:15:13.64\00:15:17.15
you know, promoting things
in this way, the positive way.
00:15:17.18\00:15:20.12
But I want to
even go a little deeper
00:15:20.15\00:15:21.48
and really challenge
it because, you know,
00:15:21.52\00:15:23.62
I'm stepping, about
to stepping my own toes.
00:15:23.65\00:15:26.76
Step on, step on. Oh, yeah.
00:15:26.79\00:15:28.12
Better step in my own
toes because there is a TV show
00:15:28.16\00:15:31.79
that is very popular
and it kind of exciting,
00:15:31.83\00:15:37.13
or even promotes the idea
that it's okay to have adultery
00:15:37.17\00:15:41.10
if it's maybe cool
and you're really smart,
00:15:41.14\00:15:44.34
it's with the
president and, you know,
00:15:44.37\00:15:46.41
no one knows about it,
00:15:46.44\00:15:47.78
and just the really
adventurous type of show.
00:15:47.81\00:15:50.98
And so, you
know, you get something
00:15:51.01\00:15:52.35
because of the story line,
the story line is exciting.
00:15:52.38\00:15:54.72
You know, sometimes we
can maybe put aside our morals
00:15:54.75\00:15:59.52
because of the show,
because of the story.
00:15:59.55\00:16:03.26
Well, this actually
it's kind of contextual
00:16:03.29\00:16:06.36
to what you were saying.
00:16:06.39\00:16:07.73
And I want to use
the example of music
00:16:07.76\00:16:09.10
in order to get where I'm going.
00:16:09.13\00:16:10.47
When I was in high school,
I started playing basketball,
00:16:10.50\00:16:12.63
I started
listening to a lot of rap
00:16:12.67\00:16:14.10
because we used to
get hype for the game,
00:16:14.14\00:16:15.64
you know, and I start listen
to a lot of the certain artist,
00:16:15.67\00:16:18.97
and then I started
eventually progressing,
00:16:19.01\00:16:20.88
I started to listen
to the radio at night,
00:16:20.91\00:16:22.24
falling asleep to it.
00:16:22.28\00:16:23.61
And I notice a
change in my behavior.
00:16:23.65\00:16:25.48
I would start to
be really aggressive,
00:16:25.51\00:16:27.58
I started, you know,
00:16:27.62\00:16:28.98
curse words
started slipping out.
00:16:29.02\00:16:30.35
And I'm like, you know,
00:16:30.39\00:16:31.72
"Where's the
behavior coming from?"
00:16:31.75\00:16:33.09
And I realize the music,
00:16:33.12\00:16:34.46
you know, we
can't fool ourselves.
00:16:34.49\00:16:36.12
The Bible is
plain, as you were saying,
00:16:36.16\00:16:37.53
"By beholding,
we become changed."
00:16:37.56\00:16:38.96
It's why we keep
our eyes on Christ,
00:16:38.99\00:16:41.00
because we want to be
changed into His image.
00:16:41.03\00:16:43.16
And at the end of the
day, if we believe that sex
00:16:43.20\00:16:45.47
is something that God gave
us in the context of marriage
00:16:45.50\00:16:48.07
and this is the
way it should work
00:16:48.10\00:16:49.57
and then we go out and
watch adultery, we watch.
00:16:49.60\00:16:52.57
And remind you, on television
whenever sex is presented,
00:16:52.61\00:16:55.84
it's almost never presented
in the context of marriage.
00:16:55.88\00:16:58.81
It's in the
context of shacking up,
00:16:58.85\00:17:00.32
it's in the context of dating,
00:17:00.35\00:17:02.18
it's in the context of adultery,
00:17:02.22\00:17:03.72
and sometimes glorify,
00:17:03.75\00:17:05.32
you know, it's okay
to cheat with this person
00:17:05.35\00:17:07.69
and even if they
don't say it's okay.
00:17:07.72\00:17:09.12
It must be okay.
Because that's your true love.
00:17:09.16\00:17:10.53
So it's okay. You're
stuck in a bad marriage.
00:17:10.56\00:17:13.23
And so now young
people are growing up
00:17:13.26\00:17:15.33
with this view of intimacy
that has been highly tainted
00:17:15.36\00:17:19.70
where they believe that
sex is something as acceptable
00:17:19.73\00:17:22.70
in other contexts
other than marriage.
00:17:22.74\00:17:24.91
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
00:17:24.94\00:17:26.27
Oh, Kean, go ahead.
00:17:26.31\00:17:27.64
I just want to add to that
00:17:27.68\00:17:29.01
in reference to
the show you mentioned
00:17:29.04\00:17:33.25
that the thing that
complicates the situation
00:17:33.28\00:17:35.82
is that I haven't seen it
but I've heard that the way
00:17:35.85\00:17:40.36
that it happens the affair,
00:17:40.39\00:17:42.36
you actually feel sorry
for the man in the affair...
00:17:42.39\00:17:46.39
And the woman.
And the woman, so...
00:17:46.43\00:17:49.53
You seen it a couple times?
00:17:52.27\00:17:53.64
Seen few clips.
00:17:53.67\00:17:56.47
You know, tell the
truth, shame the devil.
00:17:56.50\00:17:57.94
So this is the
thing that the devil
00:17:59.54\00:18:01.58
is kind of
twisting the situation,
00:18:01.61\00:18:03.51
so you know
whereas ten years ago,
00:18:03.55\00:18:06.15
you would say,
00:18:06.18\00:18:07.52
"They're having an
affair, they're wrong."
00:18:07.55\00:18:10.09
Nowadays, it's like,
"They're having affair
00:18:10.12\00:18:12.45
and, aw, well, I
kind of understand like,
00:18:12.49\00:18:18.23
he's kind of you know...
00:18:18.26\00:18:19.63
Yeah, she's
trapped. Yeah, he's trapped.
00:18:19.66\00:18:21.00
And the danger we face is that,
you know, five years from now,
00:18:21.03\00:18:25.23
you're married.
00:18:25.27\00:18:26.60
Somebody makes advances at
you, you know what I'm saying?
00:18:26.63\00:18:29.27
And it looks just like
it looked in the movie,
00:18:29.30\00:18:31.67
and now, you, instead of being
in a situation where normally,
00:18:31.71\00:18:35.11
had you been
focused on the Word of God
00:18:35.14\00:18:36.68
and had been rooted,
you'd have just dismissed it.
00:18:36.71\00:18:38.95
Or some Joseph, "No!"
00:18:38.98\00:18:41.15
But now, you're
actually thinking about it like,
00:18:41.18\00:18:44.25
you know, "Well, is this okay?
00:18:44.29\00:18:46.25
Maybe if I just, you
know, take it back a little."
00:18:46.29\00:18:49.59
You know what I'm
saying. Like it did on TV.
00:18:49.62\00:18:51.79
And I'll just going to
say, again, I'll be one that
00:18:51.83\00:18:53.76
want to say that I know
what you're all saying is true
00:18:53.80\00:18:56.16
because I felt that
before, you know, I felt that
00:18:56.20\00:18:58.83
where you start to,
your morals begin to drain
00:18:58.87\00:19:02.00
because of the
stuff you're watching.
00:19:02.04\00:19:03.37
And I begin to, you
know, now we're at the age
00:19:03.41\00:19:05.37
and hopefully warn other people
before they get to this point.
00:19:05.41\00:19:07.81
You can now see,
"Okay, that was the reason
00:19:07.84\00:19:09.54
why this stuff
happened in my life.
00:19:09.58\00:19:11.48
You know, the music you said,
00:19:11.51\00:19:13.18
you know, I
used to be just like,
00:19:13.21\00:19:15.15
it's okay to watch or
listening to certain music
00:19:15.18\00:19:17.39
but now I recognize,
"Man, when I watch or listen
00:19:17.42\00:19:20.16
to certain things,
that was my behavior
00:19:20.19\00:19:22.96
begin to go crazy and change."
00:19:22.99\00:19:25.26
We would lie to
our self and say,
00:19:25.29\00:19:26.63
"Oh, we're just
listening to the beat.
00:19:26.66\00:19:28.26
We don't listen to the words,
we just listen to the beats."
00:19:28.30\00:19:30.93
But I mean, you know,
00:19:30.97\00:19:32.30
the thing is we
all listen to the beat,
00:19:32.33\00:19:34.30
but unfortunately,
with the beat comes words.
00:19:34.34\00:19:36.87
And I have a little sister
00:19:36.91\00:19:39.21
and I praise God that
I have a little sister.
00:19:39.24\00:19:40.88
She's 17 years old.
00:19:40.91\00:19:42.64
And with her
being 17 years of age,
00:19:42.68\00:19:45.71
when she was born, she
calls me to be accountable
00:19:45.75\00:19:49.32
because I was already listening,
00:19:49.35\00:19:50.69
like you said, I mean, I know
there's one album, they say it
00:19:50.72\00:19:53.89
the most
controversial album of the year.
00:19:53.92\00:19:55.42
I was 15 years of age.
00:19:55.46\00:19:57.09
I couldn't go to
one store to buy it
00:19:57.13\00:19:58.46
so I ask my mom to
take me to another store
00:19:58.49\00:20:00.00
and they allow
me to buy the tape.
00:20:00.03\00:20:01.53
So tape...
00:20:01.56\00:20:04.43
So, there you so, there you go.
00:20:04.47\00:20:08.70
But you know, when my
little sister was born,
00:20:08.74\00:20:12.44
the Lord just put it to say,
00:20:12.47\00:20:13.88
"Would you want to
show your little sister
00:20:13.91\00:20:15.24
to date somebody who
listen to that stuff?"
00:20:15.28\00:20:17.71
Because it was
straight changing me.
00:20:17.75\00:20:19.35
I mean, at one
moment, I was starting to get
00:20:19.38\00:20:20.72
infatuated with even gang life.
00:20:20.75\00:20:22.15
And so, I mean,
I just praise God
00:20:22.18\00:20:23.95
but when we find ourselves
in those kind of situations,
00:20:23.99\00:20:26.45
it does start to dwindle
away our moralities to a point
00:20:26.49\00:20:30.19
that we start to
become empathetic
00:20:30.23\00:20:32.03
with these situations.
00:20:32.06\00:20:33.40
And we become empathetic,
00:20:33.43\00:20:34.76
it eventually makes
you spiritually pathetic.
00:20:34.80\00:20:36.16
What I want to say
is, in addition to it...
00:20:36.20\00:20:38.03
Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hallelujah.
00:20:38.07\00:20:41.64
But in addition to empathy,
00:20:41.67\00:20:43.61
I think it also
translates into identity
00:20:43.64\00:20:46.68
because we now start
to identify ourselves,
00:20:46.71\00:20:49.31
you know, I'm thinking about,
00:20:49.34\00:20:50.68
I have a lot of
nieces and nephews,
00:20:50.71\00:20:52.58
I love all my
nieces and nephews,
00:20:52.61\00:20:54.38
but they range in age
and the oldest is like 21,
00:20:54.42\00:20:59.95
and the youngest is like three.
00:20:59.99\00:21:02.36
And so they're listening
to lots of secular music
00:21:02.39\00:21:05.16
and so it's home, and you know,
00:21:05.19\00:21:07.03
I saw they were
putting on a song,
00:21:07.06\00:21:09.46
and the older
kids were singing it,
00:21:09.50\00:21:11.67
and the three year
old knew all the words.
00:21:11.70\00:21:16.17
And so you know, we say,
00:21:16.20\00:21:17.67
"Well, I'm an
adult enough to reason
00:21:17.71\00:21:21.11
and think through these lyrics,"
00:21:21.14\00:21:23.04
but what we
don't realize is that
00:21:23.08\00:21:24.78
because music
does what music does,
00:21:24.81\00:21:27.88
it infiltrates our minds in ways
00:21:27.92\00:21:29.95
that we can't even understand.
00:21:29.98\00:21:32.15
And so then what was
interesting was for Christmas,
00:21:32.19\00:21:34.72
she got little pink
wig, and some pink heels,
00:21:34.76\00:21:38.03
and some pink nails, you know,
00:21:38.06\00:21:40.06
we can identify
who that looks like.
00:21:40.10\00:21:42.66
And so they were calling her,
00:21:42.70\00:21:44.03
you know, a little tiny
version of this popular rapper.
00:21:44.07\00:21:48.27
And she's
ascribing herself at three,
00:21:48.30\00:21:51.54
identifying her womanness
and femininity with somebody
00:21:51.57\00:21:57.08
who's portrayed in this
way, and that's concerning.
00:21:57.11\00:22:00.38
Yeah, very concerning.
00:22:00.42\00:22:02.05
Let's talk, where are the
songs that used to talk about
00:22:02.08\00:22:05.89
the books in the Bible
00:22:05.92\00:22:07.26
or you've memorized
certain stories and stuff,
00:22:07.29\00:22:09.19
you know, all
that stuff is gone now.
00:22:09.22\00:22:11.19
Or even marriage, you
know, when I was younger,
00:22:11.23\00:22:14.26
there was R&B song was saying,
"Girl, let's just get married."
00:22:14.30\00:22:17.40
Get married,
right, right, right.
00:22:17.43\00:22:18.77
But now, it's like porn.
00:22:18.80\00:22:20.77
Even back then, how many
songs talked about marriage?
00:22:20.80\00:22:22.17
But at least, there
were some. Maybe one.
00:22:22.20\00:22:23.64
But at least, there were some.
00:22:23.67\00:22:25.01
I mean, you get the rare
one, but that's a good point.
00:22:25.04\00:22:28.88
It's like, why is
it that R&B industry
00:22:28.91\00:22:34.35
doesn't promote happy marriage?
00:22:34.38\00:22:36.72
Why is it always, "Girl,
I want to get you in bed."
00:22:36.75\00:22:40.32
They do but it does itself.
00:22:40.36\00:22:43.39
If you notice, but
there are songs out there
00:22:43.43\00:22:47.16
that promote marriage,
00:22:47.20\00:22:49.00
you know, that
promote godly love,
00:22:49.03\00:22:51.10
and principles of
godly love, but the problem
00:22:51.13\00:22:54.20
is those are the songs
that aren't making money.
00:22:54.24\00:22:56.47
Those are the songs that aren't,
00:22:56.50\00:22:58.17
you know, making the
top ten, top hundred.
00:22:58.21\00:23:00.34
Well, maybe the people
who actually producing,
00:23:00.38\00:23:02.58
writing and
producing these things,
00:23:02.61\00:23:03.95
maybe they have an agenda.
00:23:03.98\00:23:07.08
And maybe they don't want
to see more healthy family,
00:23:07.12\00:23:11.29
maybe the devil is
behind a lot of this.
00:23:11.32\00:23:13.42
Good one, yeah.
00:23:13.46\00:23:14.79
Well, you know, I didn't really
say I was going to say earlier,
00:23:14.82\00:23:16.96
but it's all about identity,
00:23:16.99\00:23:18.36
you know, we
talked about it before.
00:23:18.39\00:23:19.96
It's about Satan trying
to destroy the image of God.
00:23:20.00\00:23:22.63
It's who do you identify with,
00:23:22.66\00:23:24.83
as you say with your
little cousin identify
00:23:24.87\00:23:26.87
with a certain star, I guess.
00:23:26.90\00:23:29.87
When we talked
about it with Joseph,
00:23:29.90\00:23:31.87
Joseph identified with God.
00:23:31.91\00:23:33.31
He said, "How can I do this
but how can I sin against God?"
00:23:33.34\00:23:37.21
He was God's
man. He was a slave.
00:23:37.25\00:23:39.38
You know, maybe it was slaves,
00:23:39.41\00:23:40.85
that would just
happen because he's a slave,
00:23:40.88\00:23:42.98
he could have said, you know,
00:23:43.02\00:23:44.35
maybe the culture
would allow for me
00:23:44.39\00:23:46.49
in the context of the slavery
to perform my slave duties
00:23:46.52\00:23:50.86
but how could I sin against God?
00:23:50.89\00:23:52.36
He didn't
identify with his culture,
00:23:52.39\00:23:54.50
the culture or the slavery,
he identifies with God instead.
00:23:54.53\00:23:57.27
So he was in that
culture, but still understood
00:23:57.30\00:24:00.97
he had a culture of God
that he still had to cultivate.
00:24:01.00\00:24:04.81
Yes. And part of first.
00:24:04.84\00:24:06.17
You know, I read some history.
00:24:06.21\00:24:10.11
Those who were underneath
leadership in those days,
00:24:10.15\00:24:12.58
some of them became eunuch.
00:24:12.61\00:24:13.95
So it very well could
have happened that Potiphar,
00:24:13.98\00:24:16.28
it suggests that
Potiphar may have been a eunuch.
00:24:16.32\00:24:18.45
So you're right, you know,
it could have been culturally
00:24:18.49\00:24:20.32
that Potiphar's wife may
have been around other people,
00:24:20.36\00:24:23.63
and she saw Joseph
and the Bible says that
00:24:23.66\00:24:25.49
he looked good, and so she...
00:24:25.53\00:24:27.30
Joseph is fine. Yeah.
00:24:27.33\00:24:28.80
So she came up,
she came up to him
00:24:31.50\00:24:34.67
and he did what you
also say, you know, he said,
00:24:34.70\00:24:37.87
"How can I sin against God?"
00:24:37.91\00:24:39.84
And when we look in
the aspect of Psalms 139
00:24:39.87\00:24:42.81
that God is everywhere
and we have to understand
00:24:42.84\00:24:45.35
that God sees
every single thing we do.
00:24:45.38\00:24:48.32
It's not that just
because we may not see God,
00:24:48.35\00:24:50.35
but God does see us.
00:24:50.39\00:24:52.15
And so if we put that in
our minds and perspectives,
00:24:52.19\00:24:55.16
it will causes to keep ourselves
00:24:55.19\00:24:56.52
from very dangerous situations
00:24:56.56\00:24:57.89
that can affect
us on a long call.
00:24:57.93\00:24:59.26
Okay, and you
want to say something?
00:24:59.29\00:25:00.63
Yeah, I was going to
say, you know, the Bible says,
00:25:00.66\00:25:02.00
"Let everything that
have breath praise the Lord."
00:25:02.03\00:25:04.27
It talks about
praise Him with tumbrel,
00:25:04.30\00:25:06.90
it talks about instruments,
praising God with instruments.
00:25:06.94\00:25:09.24
It talks about,
you know, David dancing
00:25:09.27\00:25:10.74
as a part of praise
but it's a part of praise.
00:25:10.77\00:25:14.44
We were created to
praise and worship God.
00:25:14.48\00:25:18.11
So if whatever I'm doing
00:25:18.15\00:25:20.15
is not an act of
worship or praise,
00:25:20.18\00:25:22.38
I then need to
question, you know,
00:25:22.42\00:25:25.02
if even what
music I'm listening to,
00:25:25.05\00:25:29.12
how I'm dancing
or, you know, that,
00:25:29.16\00:25:31.03
is what I'm doing,
giving honor and praise to God
00:25:31.06\00:25:36.10
or am I trying to attract
honor and praise to myself?
00:25:36.13\00:25:41.90
As I'm listening to this,
this is convicting, you know,
00:25:41.94\00:25:45.07
and it's making me think
I have to go even further,
00:25:45.11\00:25:47.88
you know, to
really protect myself.
00:25:47.91\00:25:49.54
And it's not just
say, "Hey, I'm a pastor
00:25:49.58\00:25:51.38
and I have arrived."
00:25:51.41\00:25:52.75
You know, but really
continually going higher
00:25:52.78\00:25:54.32
to say, "Hey, we
have to protect ourselves
00:25:54.35\00:25:56.22
even more against this thing,"
because as you're all talking,
00:25:56.25\00:25:58.09
this thing is serious.
00:25:58.12\00:25:59.65
You know, but I
want to kind of just...
00:25:59.69\00:26:01.12
We have a few more minutes,
00:26:01.16\00:26:02.49
I want to also
ask this question,
00:26:02.52\00:26:03.86
I didn't want to let this one go
00:26:03.89\00:26:05.23
about the word sexy.
00:26:05.26\00:26:07.33
Okay, that's kind of a
common word we use now,
00:26:07.36\00:26:10.53
we've even used it on here.
00:26:10.57\00:26:13.60
But is that word bad
and what does it really mean
00:26:13.64\00:26:17.01
when someone says,
"I'm dressing sexy?"
00:26:17.04\00:26:18.61
You know, it's kind
of word we use there.
00:26:18.64\00:26:20.54
Well, I don't think we
have enough time for that.
00:26:20.58\00:26:21.91
Yeah, we don't
have much time too.
00:26:21.94\00:26:24.21
I mean, in this culture,
man, sexy has just become
00:26:24.25\00:26:26.88
one of those words
00:26:26.92\00:26:28.25
that just mean
something good, you know.
00:26:28.28\00:26:30.39
My jump shot is pretty
sexy, you know what I'm saying?
00:26:30.42\00:26:33.96
Because it just looks
nice, you know what I'm saying.
00:26:33.99\00:26:36.46
So sexy is nice.
So using sexy in...
00:26:36.49\00:26:40.96
Well, I mean, that's
just the way it has become,
00:26:41.00\00:26:42.73
you know, just like
saying, I know, where I'm from,
00:26:42.76\00:26:44.53
people say, you
know, "That's beast."
00:26:44.57\00:26:46.33
You know, they're not talking
about the end of relation,
00:26:46.37\00:26:47.87
they're saying that, you know,
00:26:47.90\00:26:49.37
that is just as
easy it's gong to get.
00:26:49.40\00:26:51.31
You know what I'm saying.
00:26:51.34\00:26:52.67
So I don't know, if we got
to take into consideration,
00:26:52.71\00:26:55.38
you know, the culture as
well when we use the word.
00:26:55.41\00:26:58.01
But I also think that, as
a woman, as a young woman,
00:26:58.05\00:27:02.58
when we're
presenting these images,
00:27:02.62\00:27:03.95
we've used sexiness as
how men should identify us.
00:27:03.99\00:27:08.12
And so we don't
fit into the mode
00:27:08.16\00:27:09.59
of what we ascribe sexy to.
00:27:09.62\00:27:11.09
Sexy is something good,
and beautiful, and sleek.
00:27:11.13\00:27:14.73
Whether we say that or
not, that's the connotation.
00:27:14.76\00:27:16.87
And should be covered up.
00:27:16.90\00:27:18.23
And so that's
how we attribute it.
00:27:18.27\00:27:20.74
And so if you have
people walking around,
00:27:20.77\00:27:22.10
"That's sexy, that's
sexy," and I don't look sexy,
00:27:22.14\00:27:24.54
then it's hard to
wrestle that with our identity.
00:27:24.57\00:27:27.61
All right, well, we have
no time to finish it out,
00:27:27.64\00:27:29.11
but I just want to end with this
00:27:29.14\00:27:30.48
quote from Revelation 2:20.
00:27:30.51\00:27:31.85
It says, "Nevertheless,
I have this against you.
00:27:31.88\00:27:34.25
You tolerate that woman Jezebel
who calls herself a prophetess
00:27:34.28\00:27:38.59
but her teaching, she misleads
00:27:38.62\00:27:41.32
my servant into
sexual immorality."
00:27:41.36\00:27:43.79
So we got to be
careful what we tolerate
00:27:43.83\00:27:45.23
as Christians, okay?
00:27:45.26\00:27:47.03
We got to be
careful what we watch
00:27:47.06\00:27:48.40
and what we listen to.
00:27:48.43\00:27:49.76
So that's our
program, I hope you enjoy it.
00:27:49.80\00:27:51.90
And remember to
make pure choices.
00:27:51.93\00:27:54.74