The following program
discusses sensitive issues.
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Parents are
cautioned that some material
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may be too candid
for younger children.
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Hello and
welcome to Pure Choices.
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I'm your host
Pastor Joshua Nelson.
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And I'm just so excited
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that you decided
to join us today.
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We have an exciting
program for you today.
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We have a group from, all
the way from Miami, Florida
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called Pure Reality,
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not to be
confused with Pure Choices,
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and they are
wearing their nice shirts.
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I tried to match them today
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but I don't got the logo on mine
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but so happy to have you
all here today on the set
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and just want to
hear a little bit
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about Pure Choices,
Pure Reality, excuse me.
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Pure Reality is
a program in Miami
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that talks about purity.
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And so we're excited
to have you here today.
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Maybe just start
and tell me a little bit
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about your journeys
and how you got here?
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And why this is a passion
for you to talk about purity?
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Well, my name is Donnakaye
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and when I look at some
of our experiences in life,
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we all come up with labels.
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There are just certain
labels that are put on us
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just based on what
we've been through.
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And for me as a single
parent starting with that,
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I just think about the
journey that I've come through
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from the things that
have happened to me personally
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and as being a
Christian and reconciling
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that God loves me from
being a product of rape
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to molestation, incest,
just my own choices that I made
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because of that and looking up
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and trying to say,
"God, where are you?"
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And when finding
out that God loves me,
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He loves me just as I am
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and that He can take everything.
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The some of all
those experiences,
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all the labels that
tried to hold me down
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that he could take those things
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and decide that, "You know what?
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Through you, I'm going to answer
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the desire of your heart
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and that is that
other young people
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can be enlightened and empowered
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from very young age.
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So that they can understand
that no matter what happens,
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I am God and I can make
something beautiful from it."
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Amen. Amen. Powerful.
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Someone else wanna share?
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Miss. Dominique?
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Yes, my name is Dominique,
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and my story is a
little bit different,
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and a little bit similar.
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So I did experience
some molestation as a child.
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My parents are
divorced and at a very young age
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they were separated,
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so I grew up with
my mother, mostly.
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And so many things
happened in my childhood
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that really
collide my experience.
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So when I had my own children,
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I got married and
I had my children,
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I was very fearful
that what happened to me
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would happen with them.
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So at a very young age
it was my duty to teach them
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and empower them
without exposing them
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to withstand the
lure of what is gold
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and because it glitters.
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Yeah.
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And therefore, I found
myself needing to speak to them
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from the get-go about
the true nature of sex,
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the true nature of purity.
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What it is that
God expects from them?
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And even in their
decision making process
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to make sure that they
knew, what was the expectation
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on their lives and
what their purpose was.
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So Pure Reality for us is
a way to redirect children
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that have not found that purpose
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or don't know what God
intends for their lives
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and to give them a way to go.
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Okay. That's beautiful. Lauldi?
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Hi, my name is Lauldi,
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and I grew up in a
two-parent household,
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parents are still married today.
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And I believe that
I represent the face
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that most of us as Adventists
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or people in society would want
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as far as a household
having two-parent household,
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growing up the kids,
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a Christian type of environment.
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I really do believe
despite having that,
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I think my
parents tried the best
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that possible way to
raise us as children.
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But the one thing
I would actually say
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is the fact that
they weren't open enough,
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open enough to really dialogue
about the issues and sexuality.
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You know, we were
told and I joke about this
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with the girls
all the time about,
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you know, being a
young lady and growing up
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and no embarrassment to my mom.
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But, you know, as a
young lady, you know,
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going through
your menstrual period
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and having that
dialogue with your parent.
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You would think
they would sit down
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and really talk to
you about, you know,
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sexuality and everything else.
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And at that particular
point in time, I mean,
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it was something
very, very basic.
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You know, now is the
times that you don't,
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you know, talk to boys.
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You know, you don't
let a boy touch you.
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And being so naive and
silly, you know, you're like,
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"Okay, you know what?
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During that period
time I can't talk to boys."
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You know, as if
osmosis was gonna occur.
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But you know what?
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I think that is so important
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and one of the
things that I've realized
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is the fact that a
lot of us as parents,
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a lot of our parents
do not talk to their kids.
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And I really do believe
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that as parents
that's a major responsibility
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that we hold as far as
empowering our children
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with the key tools on
how to prevent situations
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as it relates to
the opposite sex.
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So for me that's
my critical emphasis
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or passion as to the
importance of parents
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really dialoguing
with their children.
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Okay.
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And I really
appreciate your sharing,
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you know, part of your story.
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And I do want to just
touch on what you just said
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before we kind of
go into a little more
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about your
ministry and Pure Reality.
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When you just talked
about how many parents
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sometimes it's hard for them
maybe to discuss these things
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with their kid, why is that?
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You know, why is that?
Any one wanna just share it?
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Why do you think that
is, that it's just so hard
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for that to be discussed?
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Because the world
had made sex something
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that is nasty and dirty,
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even though it's
something that is beautiful
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that God has created.
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And when sex happens
within the confines of marriage
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as God intended it to
be, it's a beautiful thing.
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But because everything
God does has a counterfeit.
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The devil has
created this illusion
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that sex is dirty
and should be hidden,
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and so parents
developed the shame
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about talking to
their children about sex.
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Furthermore, nobody
wants their children to know
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their own deficiencies.
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So as parents
we're afraid for them
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to see the transparency in us
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and our vulnerability
and where we've been.
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So we hide it and cover it
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and in order not
to expose ourselves
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and confront our own issues,
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then we shield our children
completely from the topic.
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Right.
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And, Donnakaye, I think
you'd mentioned something
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about this when we were talking
before on just about, you know,
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hiding things or, you know,
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why do we feel
a need to do that?
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People feel a need to hide
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because they don't understand
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the full scope of
what they're dealing with.
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There is not a
deeper understanding,
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there's pain, there's hurt,
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there are issues
and so therefore,
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basically we tend to cover up.
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It goes back to the
garden, you know, Adam and Eve,
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when Eve bought the
fruit and they bit that fruit,
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automatically
their eyes were opened
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and they felt this need,
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you know, to cover up.
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And so it's a natural
thing that comes because of sin,
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and when you look at the family,
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this is where the church starts.
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And if in the family
things are being covered up,
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and they're hidden,
then the church as a whole
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cannot confront
what it cannot deal with.
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And things that are covered,
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they don't heal
well and so therefore,
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we tend to go ahead and hide
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because it's the
natural inclination
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that is within us
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forgetting that as
Christians we are empowered
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by the power of the Holy Spirit,
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to call sin by its right name,
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and to fight a spiritual warfare
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that we can tear
down whatever stronghold.
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Amen. And that's so true.
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We wanna talk a
little more about that
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before we go into that,
I want to really just talk
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about what is Pure Reality?
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You know, what is the
ministry that you all have,
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you know, presented to us?
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And really how did it start?
You know, what was it really?
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You got to tell me
a little story about,
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kind of, how it started?
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And why you felt a passion
to talk about this subject?
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So who wants to share?
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Lauldi, you're
smiling, you wanna share?
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Okay. Go ahead.
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Well, we started
about 10 years ago
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and the emphasis
with Pure Reality
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is really dealing with
issues of sexual immorality
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and teaching
purity as a lifestyle.
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That's the basis.
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And we actually cater
to the ages of 12 to 24.
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I believe that God led
these powerful women here
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next to me together really,
we come with different phases.
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We represent
different aspects of the family.
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And I think what
makes us different
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is the fact that we are parents.
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We have our
love for our children
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and we want to be able
to deal with the issues
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that we ourselves
probably didn't have
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and be able to empower
our children to be better.
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So at the time we both, we
all actually had teenagers.
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I think my older
daughter was probably about 14
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and probably
making 15 at the time.
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And, you know, there
was just some big need
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I believe for
addressing that issue.
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Now you're having teenagers
and thinking about boys
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and it's like, wow, holy book.
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So you were just afraid,
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you don't want
them to get involved
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with some of the
boys you saw in there.
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You know, seriously,
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I was not ready
as a parent to like,
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see my kids starting to
think about dating at all.
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And that scared me and then,
of course, of the fact that,
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you know, HIV, AIDS and
all these different issues
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as it relates to sexual,
you know, deviant behavior
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that my kids could be
exposed to those type of things.
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So for me that
was a big, big issue
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and I remember distinctly
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and I was sharing this
with these ladies earlier.
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Back then, I
remember there was a school
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that was very
close to our church
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and they had
these high statistics
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of over 67% of
the graduating class
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had HIV and that
scared me to death.
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Sure.
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I was like, "Wow,
my child is a teenager,
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what are the
chances of her interacting
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or meeting one of
these kids from the school
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and possibly even dating them?
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And when I felt that as a parent
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it was extremely
important at that time
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to actually address the issues,
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make our kids be
more aware of dating,
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and all of the issues
as it relates to purity.
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So you say we
got to do something.
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We got to address
this. We got to do something.
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Hey, let's just move on this.
00:11:29.32\00:11:30.95
Let's start
talking and dialoging.
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So you all were
talking together? Okay.
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And funny enough I would say
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that our friendship
really wasn't a deep friendship,
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we knew each other from church,
00:11:39.43\00:11:42.53
but I believe in
interacting and talking
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we started clicking really.
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And I really do believe
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that God really led
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the three of us
together with our stories
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and seeing the world
from a different perspective.
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And to be
totally honest with you,
00:11:58.88\00:12:00.75
I remember as we got
together to really pursue this
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and go before the church as to,
00:12:05.45\00:12:07.26
"Hey, we need to
start something."
00:12:07.29\00:12:10.06
We got a lot of pushback.
00:12:10.09\00:12:11.43
Yeah. We got a lot of pushback.
00:12:11.46\00:12:13.90
We didn't get a lot of buy in.
00:12:13.93\00:12:16.10
As a matter of fact as
we sat to really dialogue
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about what this would look like.
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Our initial intent
was to really pursue...
00:12:20.87\00:12:23.81
The girls. A
girl's, a girl's emphasis.
00:12:23.84\00:12:27.14
And as we dialogue
more we realized that,
00:12:27.18\00:12:29.41
"Hey, you know what?
00:12:29.44\00:12:30.78
We're gonna be
teaching these girls.
00:12:30.81\00:12:32.15
What we need to be teaching them
00:12:32.18\00:12:33.75
and they're coming
back with the same boys.
00:12:33.78\00:12:35.12
Right. Right.
00:12:35.15\00:12:36.48
So we're like, "Hey,
we got to do something."
00:12:36.52\00:12:37.85
So we actually got
together and decided,
00:12:37.89\00:12:39.65
"Hey, we gonna definitely
put together a ministry
00:12:39.69\00:12:42.39
or retreat for girls and boys.
00:12:42.42\00:12:44.46
Okay. And...
00:12:44.49\00:12:45.89
So talk about that
pushback a little bit.
00:12:45.93\00:12:48.83
You know, what was
kind of the reasons
00:12:48.86\00:12:50.50
why maybe people
didn't like the idea
00:12:50.53\00:12:53.13
that you all
were coming together
00:12:53.17\00:12:54.50
and wanted to
talk about the subject.
00:12:54.54\00:12:56.40
Sex in church is taboo. Okay.
00:12:56.44\00:12:58.97
You don't talk
about sex from the pulpit.
00:12:59.01\00:13:01.61
And 10 years ago,
00:13:01.64\00:13:03.11
you didn't even
mention anything sexual at all
00:13:03.14\00:13:06.41
and it was scary for people.
00:13:06.45\00:13:09.48
And so again the
exposure and the transparency
00:13:09.52\00:13:13.32
that has to come through,
people were very shy about it.
00:13:13.36\00:13:18.03
They didn't want their children,
00:13:18.06\00:13:19.39
they thought their
children were not exposed
00:13:19.43\00:13:21.46
to this kind of behavior.
00:13:21.50\00:13:23.73
When children
everywhere watch television,
00:13:23.77\00:13:26.90
listen to music,
00:13:26.94\00:13:28.50
and even just from the
lyrics of today's music
00:13:28.54\00:13:32.24
can have a whole curriculum
about sexual behavior.
00:13:32.27\00:13:36.28
Right. You don't
need to see anything.
00:13:36.31\00:13:38.71
On top of it,
00:13:38.75\00:13:40.08
we have
encountered a lot of parents
00:13:40.12\00:13:41.72
who do not talk to
their children about sex,
00:13:41.75\00:13:44.29
and who do not
expose their children
00:13:44.32\00:13:46.49
to what real
intimacy is in the home.
00:13:46.52\00:13:50.66
I have met young men
who are in their 20's,
00:13:50.69\00:13:53.19
who have never
seen their parents
00:13:53.23\00:13:55.33
have an embracing moment.
00:13:55.36\00:13:59.03
And so there was a
deficiency in the church body
00:13:59.07\00:14:04.37
related to
intimacy, relationship, sex
00:14:04.41\00:14:08.44
and so people did not want
00:14:08.48\00:14:11.35
their
deficiencies to be exposed.
00:14:11.38\00:14:13.68
Right.
00:14:13.72\00:14:15.05
Or having to confront
their children about it.
00:14:15.08\00:14:17.22
So there was a lot of fear,
little skepticism about it,
00:14:17.25\00:14:19.22
but you'll press forward.
00:14:19.25\00:14:20.59
Okay. Go ahead.
00:14:20.62\00:14:21.96
From what kind of
happened is I believe that
00:14:21.99\00:14:24.69
when God is setting anything up
00:14:24.73\00:14:27.76
in order to help humans
to see it from all angles,
00:14:27.80\00:14:32.50
He allows our
humanness to come into play
00:14:32.53\00:14:35.60
and so what I feel
00:14:35.64\00:14:37.34
is that the Holy Spirit really
wanted us to see the full scale
00:14:37.37\00:14:40.94
of how warfare was
right there within the church
00:14:40.98\00:14:43.88
and not even dealing
with what's in the world,
00:14:43.91\00:14:45.58
but right there in the church.
00:14:45.61\00:14:47.02
And so because of it,
while we deal with 12 to 24,
00:14:47.05\00:14:51.02
it helped us to realize
00:14:51.05\00:14:52.49
that there needed
to be a broader issue.
00:14:52.52\00:14:55.56
Because not only were the girls,
00:14:55.59\00:14:57.59
would girls come
back to the same boys
00:14:57.63\00:14:59.33
but coming back
to the same home,
00:14:59.36\00:15:00.76
you come back to
the same leadership.
00:15:00.80\00:15:02.23
So the Holy Spirit
use that to illuminate
00:15:02.26\00:15:04.47
and say to us, it's
not just about 12 to 24,
00:15:04.50\00:15:08.94
it's about cradle to grave
00:15:08.97\00:15:10.31
and it's actually
about cradle to grave
00:15:10.34\00:15:11.67
because of the fact that,
let me tell you something,
00:15:11.71\00:15:14.51
in dealing with the children
00:15:14.54\00:15:16.38
the parents are
going to be listening.
00:15:16.41\00:15:18.31
So I'm gonna need to
deal with the parents
00:15:18.35\00:15:20.42
but, you know what, as
humans and we can say this today
00:15:20.45\00:15:23.89
as humans when we're saying
00:15:23.92\00:15:25.25
that we're
dealing with the children,
00:15:25.29\00:15:26.92
it brings the
guard of the parent down.
00:15:26.96\00:15:28.56
And so they are able to receive
00:15:28.59\00:15:30.66
because God knows
how to get each of us,
00:15:30.69\00:15:33.03
and then in
dealing with parents,
00:15:33.06\00:15:34.86
now you're
dealing with leadership.
00:15:34.90\00:15:36.23
And because it's
about the children,
00:15:36.26\00:15:37.83
it's about the parents,
00:15:37.87\00:15:39.20
then it brings the
guard of leadership down
00:15:39.23\00:15:40.57
and their ears are open.
00:15:40.60\00:15:41.94
And so in that way the
Lord is getting the exposure
00:15:41.97\00:15:44.97
that He needs to
touch each and every life
00:15:45.01\00:15:48.24
because of the structure
of how our program is built.
00:15:48.28\00:15:51.31
Right. Right. Okay.
00:15:51.35\00:15:52.68
You know,
because of the structure.
00:15:52.71\00:15:54.05
So let's talk about that.
00:15:54.08\00:15:55.42
When you talk about
that structure a little bit,
00:15:55.45\00:15:56.79
you know, how is it structured?
00:15:56.82\00:15:58.15
And what makes your
program may be different
00:15:58.19\00:15:59.52
than some other maybe retreat
or other workshop out there?
00:15:59.55\00:16:05.33
What is it that really makes
Pure Reality, Pure Reality?
00:16:05.36\00:16:09.56
There's a couple of
things with Pure Reality.
00:16:09.60\00:16:12.33
We teach only abstinence,
there is a lot of programs
00:16:12.37\00:16:15.30
that teach abstinence plus.
00:16:15.34\00:16:17.27
Meaning you have it and out.
00:16:17.31\00:16:19.24
You have "Just in case."
00:16:19.27\00:16:22.64
We don't believe that
there is a just in case
00:16:22.68\00:16:24.65
in God's law.
00:16:24.68\00:16:26.01
It is what it is,
00:16:26.05\00:16:27.45
and God empowers
us to follow His law.
00:16:27.48\00:16:30.42
So our Pure Reality
does not compromise purity,
00:16:30.45\00:16:34.39
and does not preach that,
00:16:34.42\00:16:36.02
just in case you
decide to try it,
00:16:36.06\00:16:39.03
then use this or that.
00:16:39.06\00:16:40.93
There is no such thing.
00:16:40.96\00:16:42.66
And also we think
that purity is not just,
00:16:42.70\00:16:46.23
not doing sex
like Pastor Kelly said,
00:16:46.27\00:16:50.17
"Purity is not the
absence of something,
00:16:50.21\00:16:53.88
it's the presence of someone."
00:16:53.91\00:16:55.84
And so Pure Reality teaches you
00:16:55.88\00:16:58.08
that your
relationship with Jesus Christ
00:16:58.11\00:17:01.55
is what causes you to be pure
00:17:01.58\00:17:04.12
because impurity cannot
stand in presence of God.
00:17:04.15\00:17:07.66
And so your purity is dependent
00:17:07.69\00:17:10.99
on your
relationship with Christ.
00:17:11.03\00:17:12.99
So the deeper your
relationship with Christ,
00:17:13.03\00:17:15.33
the stronger you are
and your desire to be pure.
00:17:15.36\00:17:19.50
And the more you
are able to sustain
00:17:19.53\00:17:21.70
and withstand that
upfront of the devil.
00:17:21.74\00:17:26.07
Okay. Amen.
00:17:26.11\00:17:27.44
And a part of what
also makes us different
00:17:27.48\00:17:29.31
is that the components of
how we teach, what we teach.
00:17:29.34\00:17:33.31
Because it's not just,
00:17:33.35\00:17:34.68
"Our emphasis is
not on abstinence,"
00:17:34.72\00:17:36.85
as she said our
emphasis is on relationship.
00:17:36.89\00:17:39.52
And our emphasis is on the fact
00:17:39.55\00:17:41.49
that we use this
word sex so loosely,
00:17:41.52\00:17:43.36
but it's really about intimacy.
00:17:43.39\00:17:45.16
It's really about
00:17:45.19\00:17:46.53
an intimate
relationship with God,
00:17:46.56\00:17:48.83
in order to
understand who you are,
00:17:48.86\00:17:51.10
and it's not just about sex
00:17:51.13\00:17:52.67
because there's a whole
arena of choices out there
00:17:52.70\00:17:56.94
that may not be
of a sexual nature
00:17:56.97\00:18:00.24
but may lead you to a sexual act
00:18:00.28\00:18:03.24
because of your other choices.
00:18:03.28\00:18:04.61
And so therefore, we
address and we give a place,
00:18:04.65\00:18:08.38
what makes it different.
00:18:08.42\00:18:09.75
We give young
people a place of security
00:18:09.78\00:18:13.15
where I can come to you,
00:18:13.19\00:18:15.06
and a young lady can come to
us and say, my arms, I cut them
00:18:15.09\00:18:19.83
because this is the only
way that I can release the pain,
00:18:19.86\00:18:22.40
and there is no condemnation.
00:18:22.43\00:18:24.33
I can then talk
to this young lady,
00:18:24.37\00:18:27.64
the Lord has just, I
just, I'm just so excited
00:18:27.67\00:18:30.31
when I think about what God
has done because He showed us.
00:18:30.34\00:18:33.48
We have to have it
in a mentored fashion.
00:18:33.51\00:18:35.24
So we have the mentorship,
00:18:35.28\00:18:36.61
we have professionals
that are on our staff.
00:18:36.64\00:18:40.05
We have people that
are trained by, you know,
00:18:40.08\00:18:43.82
by the educational system
00:18:43.85\00:18:45.19
and then those
that the Holy Spirit
00:18:45.22\00:18:46.55
has just empowered
00:18:46.59\00:18:47.92
and so we have
levels of security.
00:18:47.96\00:18:49.69
We have everything in
place that the Lord has told us
00:18:49.72\00:18:52.39
and that the
Holy Spirit had said,
00:18:52.43\00:18:53.76
"This is what they
need in order to be safe,
00:18:53.80\00:18:56.63
in order for
their eyes to be open."
00:18:56.67\00:18:58.43
And we take that and
it's not just anyone thing,
00:18:58.47\00:19:02.54
it's a combination
of a group of things
00:19:02.57\00:19:05.97
that really just set
young people in a place
00:19:06.01\00:19:08.18
of being able to say,
00:19:08.21\00:19:09.71
"I can be transparent because
you've been transparent."
00:19:09.74\00:19:12.21
Amen. That's powerful.
00:19:12.25\00:19:13.58
And I wanna talk a little
bit as we're going to our close.
00:19:13.62\00:19:16.69
What are some stories
maybe you can share with us,
00:19:16.72\00:19:19.32
some success stories
about what this program,
00:19:19.35\00:19:21.89
this ministry has done?
00:19:21.92\00:19:23.26
What you've seen actually
happened through the spirit?
00:19:23.29\00:19:26.70
Breaking down on strongholds.
00:19:26.73\00:19:29.40
Mercy.
00:19:29.43\00:19:32.20
Sometimes we see young man,
00:19:32.23\00:19:33.74
for me one of the
most powerful experiences
00:19:33.77\00:19:35.70
is to be able to see
young man, ages 16 and up,
00:19:35.74\00:19:40.68
even 20 year olds,
just breaking down.
00:19:40.71\00:19:46.75
You know, a lot
of times we think
00:19:46.78\00:19:48.12
and we started talking
earlier about the taboos,
00:19:48.15\00:19:50.39
and the girls, and I
think even as a church
00:19:50.42\00:19:52.95
or community or society,
00:19:52.99\00:19:54.66
we always put
this onus on females
00:19:54.69\00:19:57.13
as if we're the
ones always at fault,
00:19:57.16\00:19:58.73
we're the ones that have
to have our stuff straight
00:19:58.76\00:20:00.86
so that the guys
won't fall, you know,
00:20:00.90\00:20:03.43
but a lot of our
young men are struggling.
00:20:03.47\00:20:05.67
And for me this
hold, just Pure Reality
00:20:05.70\00:20:10.41
and this whole
stuff have taught me a lot
00:20:10.44\00:20:12.94
about not being judgmental.
00:20:12.97\00:20:15.24
And understanding
how people's backgrounds,
00:20:15.28\00:20:18.81
their
households, what they live,
00:20:18.85\00:20:20.88
the experiences that
they with their parents
00:20:20.92\00:20:22.55
or don't have
with their parents,
00:20:22.58\00:20:25.79
things that
causes them to act out,
00:20:25.82\00:20:28.92
things that causes them
to get into pornography,
00:20:28.96\00:20:31.06
things that cause them
00:20:31.09\00:20:32.43
to have promiscuous
behavior or lifestyles.
00:20:32.46\00:20:34.36
Right.
00:20:34.40\00:20:36.20
You know, homosexuality,
lesbianism, I mean, name it.
00:20:36.23\00:20:41.50
And just to see
sometimes these young men
00:20:41.54\00:20:43.24
that probably
don't have father figures
00:20:43.27\00:20:45.37
that found
themselves just looking for love
00:20:45.41\00:20:47.61
in all the wrong places.
00:20:47.64\00:20:49.44
Finding out that, you
know, we talked about this
00:20:49.48\00:20:51.58
all pure generation concept
00:20:51.61\00:20:54.08
but, you know,
technically speaking again
00:20:54.12\00:20:57.39
I don't have to
lose my sexuality to show
00:20:57.42\00:21:00.59
that I'm really a
man, what makes me a man.
00:21:00.62\00:21:03.39
And being able to see
they're saying, you know,
00:21:03.43\00:21:05.26
hey, you know, I hurt.
00:21:05.29\00:21:08.10
You know, every time I
did, I have a sexual...
00:21:08.13\00:21:13.40
Interaction?
00:21:13.44\00:21:14.77
Encounter that it
wasn't necessarily something
00:21:14.80\00:21:16.97
that made me feel masculine
or feel good about myself
00:21:17.01\00:21:20.54
that I do suffer with guilt.
00:21:20.58\00:21:22.81
And being able to
let go of themselves.
00:21:22.84\00:21:25.01
Okay.
00:21:25.05\00:21:26.38
Again what makes it different
00:21:26.41\00:21:27.75
is that our speakers
are extremely transparent.
00:21:27.78\00:21:30.09
You don't find that
in every kind of arena
00:21:30.12\00:21:33.42
or retreat that you go to.
00:21:33.46\00:21:35.06
So it puts the kids at the place
00:21:35.09\00:21:36.76
where they feel comfortable.
00:21:36.79\00:21:38.59
Sometimes our
speakers might be people
00:21:38.63\00:21:40.40
that may have also
suffer from molestation
00:21:40.43\00:21:44.07
or domestic violence.
00:21:44.10\00:21:45.97
And a lot of our
children believe it or not
00:21:46.00\00:21:47.74
are in those same
types of environments.
00:21:47.77\00:21:51.21
We do statistics every year
00:21:51.24\00:21:53.71
and funny enough
we just did our last,
00:21:53.74\00:21:56.18
I was just getting some
numbers from our last survey.
00:21:56.21\00:21:59.88
And on an average we
have about 400 young people
00:21:59.91\00:22:02.35
that come to these retreats.
00:22:02.38\00:22:04.02
And got some numbers
between the ages of 14 to 17,
00:22:04.05\00:22:09.62
actually under 18, we had
about 47% of our young people
00:22:09.66\00:22:13.83
who're already sexually
active within that age group.
00:22:13.86\00:22:17.63
One in three of our young ladies
00:22:17.67\00:22:20.70
have had some type of exposure
00:22:20.74\00:22:22.34
to some type of
molestations or rape.
00:22:22.37\00:22:26.17
Now these are
numbers that's in our church,
00:22:26.21\00:22:29.01
even though our
retreat it's actually open
00:22:29.04\00:22:31.01
not just to the church members,
00:22:31.05\00:22:32.45
it's also open to the community.
00:22:32.48\00:22:34.32
We have a large
not just in the Florida
00:22:34.35\00:22:37.65
but we have a
pretty large cross-section
00:22:37.69\00:22:40.22
of different people
coming to the retreat.
00:22:40.26\00:22:43.43
We have folks that are
coming from the Islands as well,
00:22:43.46\00:22:46.59
from Jamaica, from the Barbados,
00:22:46.63\00:22:48.63
we have from Bahamas.
00:22:48.66\00:22:50.47
Exactly, we have people
that travel all over the place.
00:22:50.50\00:22:52.87
But we actually do the surveys
00:22:52.90\00:22:54.44
and our surveys
reflect some of the same issues
00:22:54.47\00:22:57.04
that we have in
our regular community.
00:22:57.07\00:22:59.37
So we have some critical issues.
00:22:59.41\00:23:00.88
So, yeah, what
makes it powerful?
00:23:00.91\00:23:02.38
What's, as far as the experience
00:23:02.41\00:23:04.15
that I see in these
kids having breakthrough.
00:23:04.18\00:23:06.61
For me Pure Reality is
about breaking the cycle,
00:23:06.65\00:23:09.68
to me it's about
starting new legacies.
00:23:09.72\00:23:11.92
Despite the hurt
that you have gone through
00:23:11.95\00:23:14.16
that you can make a
difference in your family.
00:23:14.19\00:23:16.36
So, you know, if
anything if I were to say
00:23:16.39\00:23:21.20
at the end of the
day, what's the success,
00:23:21.23\00:23:23.06
is being able to
see these kids saying,
00:23:23.10\00:23:24.70
"Hey, I can
break this cycle today,
00:23:24.73\00:23:27.00
I can make it different,
00:23:27.04\00:23:28.44
I can make my
family look different."
00:23:28.47\00:23:30.57
So...
00:23:30.61\00:23:31.94
And it changes who they are,
it change the reality, really.
00:23:31.97\00:23:33.31
It changes their
whole perspective.
00:23:33.34\00:23:35.11
It definitely does.
00:23:35.14\00:23:36.48
And again when we look
00:23:36.51\00:23:37.85
at the large
increase in divorce,
00:23:37.88\00:23:40.55
this stuff is hitting
us right here in a church.
00:23:40.58\00:23:42.65
Okay.
00:23:42.68\00:23:44.02
Our numbers almost equivalent
to what it is out there
00:23:44.05\00:23:46.69
as far as that 50%.
00:23:46.72\00:23:48.22
So, hey, we're here trying
to build healthy relationships
00:23:48.26\00:23:51.53
and therefore
hopefully have situations
00:23:51.56\00:23:54.06
where our kids now
have healthy marriages.
00:23:54.10\00:23:57.57
We want to be able to empower
our children to the point
00:23:57.60\00:23:59.83
where they now
have all the tools
00:23:59.87\00:24:02.00
to be able to have happy homes.
00:24:02.04\00:24:03.37
Amen.
00:24:03.41\00:24:04.74
As we're going to close,
00:24:04.77\00:24:06.11
you wanna go ahead and
share one maybe another story
00:24:06.14\00:24:07.64
or something that took place.
00:24:07.68\00:24:09.01
Furthermore for when
we look at our children
00:24:09.04\00:24:12.11
at Pure Reality, the
beautiful thing for me
00:24:12.15\00:24:15.05
coming from the
personal place inside of me
00:24:15.08\00:24:19.42
is to then now see young people
embrace this message and say,
00:24:19.45\00:24:24.46
you know, I'm going To
take that extra stance,
00:24:24.49\00:24:26.49
we have a treasure key ceremony
that we do after the retreats
00:24:26.53\00:24:28.96
and take this
extra stance to say,
00:24:29.00\00:24:31.27
I know that I
can now be empowered,
00:24:31.30\00:24:33.27
and I have accountability,
and I can remain pure,
00:24:33.30\00:24:36.27
I can talk through
my choices with someone,
00:24:36.30\00:24:38.74
and I know that
I have that power
00:24:38.77\00:24:40.11
of the Holy Sprit in my life.
00:24:40.14\00:24:41.48
But then the part
that's really beautiful
00:24:41.51\00:24:43.88
is seeing the same young
people that came to the retreat
00:24:43.91\00:24:47.15
and Satan's lies
have been destroyed,
00:24:47.18\00:24:49.55
they have a new reality.
00:24:49.58\00:24:50.95
Then we train them and
then they reach this generation.
00:24:50.99\00:24:55.92
Wow. Yeah.
00:24:55.96\00:24:57.29
Because young people will
know how to reach young people.
00:24:57.33\00:24:59.23
So it's not about us giving them
00:24:59.26\00:25:02.53
or just
facilitating a form for them,
00:25:02.56\00:25:04.70
them in turn taking and saying,
00:25:04.73\00:25:06.80
I'm going to take
this and only a way
00:25:06.84\00:25:08.60
that young people can
00:25:08.64\00:25:09.97
and I'm going to
impact my generation.
00:25:10.01\00:25:12.47
That's what discipleship is.
00:25:12.51\00:25:13.84
That's exactly
what discipleship is.
00:25:13.88\00:25:15.84
And I'm gonna impact that
00:25:15.88\00:25:17.45
and it doesn't
matter what my scars are.
00:25:17.48\00:25:20.32
Because we talk about a
lot about the sexual component
00:25:20.35\00:25:22.82
like I said, we deal with purity
00:25:22.85\00:25:24.25
and purity is
not just about sex.
00:25:24.29\00:25:25.95
Purity is about your
choices on a day-to-day basis.
00:25:25.99\00:25:29.19
It's about that alcohol
00:25:29.22\00:25:30.56
that you're
drinking behind there,
00:25:30.59\00:25:31.93
it's about the bulimia,
it's about the cigarettes,
00:25:31.96\00:25:35.46
it's about so much
more, it's about the thoughts,
00:25:35.50\00:25:38.23
the envy, malice,
jealousy, and pride.
00:25:38.27\00:25:40.37
And it's a place to
say, I'm not perfect,
00:25:40.40\00:25:42.70
but I'm
learning and when I learn
00:25:42.74\00:25:44.54
and I empower someone else,
then the Holy Spirit helps me
00:25:44.57\00:25:47.51
to be stronger in my work.
00:25:47.54\00:25:48.88
Amen. Amen.
00:25:48.91\00:25:50.25
And a perfect
example of success to us
00:25:50.28\00:25:52.61
is the marriages.
00:25:52.65\00:25:53.98
Yeah.
00:25:54.02\00:25:55.35
So we've had a few
marriages in the last few years.
00:25:55.38\00:25:57.75
And the young people who came
to the Treasure Key Ceremony
00:25:57.79\00:26:01.29
where they
receive a key in a box
00:26:01.32\00:26:04.43
that has a note in it
to their future spouse,
00:26:04.46\00:26:07.06
promising to keep
themselves on to that spouse.
00:26:07.10\00:26:09.53
That's awesome.
00:26:09.56\00:26:10.90
Whether or not they
had kept themselves before,
00:26:10.93\00:26:12.97
there is a
redemptive power in Pure Reality
00:26:13.00\00:26:15.80
and Jesus where He restores
what the locust had taken.
00:26:15.84\00:26:20.14
And so these young
people have now decided
00:26:20.18\00:26:23.14
whether or not they
were sexually pure before,
00:26:23.18\00:26:26.41
to continue on
the word of purity
00:26:26.45\00:26:29.18
and at the altar
they exchange keys
00:26:29.22\00:26:32.35
with their
partner, with their spouse.
00:26:32.39\00:26:34.82
And so we just
feel extremely blessed
00:26:34.86\00:26:38.26
that God is allowing us
00:26:38.29\00:26:39.96
the opportunity
to make a difference
00:26:40.00\00:26:42.63
and a new
generation to tell others
00:26:42.66\00:26:45.93
that everybody is not doing it.
00:26:45.97\00:26:48.70
That's right.
00:26:48.74\00:26:50.07
Contrary to the
message that is popular.
00:26:50.11\00:26:52.37
Everybody is not doing it.
00:26:52.41\00:26:54.64
Amen.
00:26:54.68\00:26:56.01
And there are some who decide
00:26:56.04\00:26:57.38
that they're
gonna be like Joseph
00:26:57.41\00:26:58.78
and learn from Potiphar's wife.
00:26:58.81\00:27:00.78
The psalm will decide
00:27:00.82\00:27:02.28
that they're
going to be like Esther
00:27:02.32\00:27:03.99
and live for the purpose
00:27:04.02\00:27:05.55
that God has
created them to live
00:27:05.59\00:27:07.89
and just be there as a sample,
just stand there for Christ,
00:27:07.92\00:27:12.83
and be a witness that
purity is a lifestyle choice
00:27:12.86\00:27:16.90
that God had given us.
00:27:16.93\00:27:18.37
That's right. And
it's a beautiful thing.
00:27:18.40\00:27:20.37
We are not just the
children from our church
00:27:20.40\00:27:21.94
but as we explain the community
when their eyes are just opened
00:27:21.97\00:27:26.71
and they're like, wow,
00:27:26.74\00:27:28.48
I have something
different I can choose from.
00:27:28.51\00:27:30.78
Wow. That is so beautiful.
00:27:30.81\00:27:32.15
I just want to
thank you, three of you,
00:27:32.18\00:27:33.95
the directors coming on
and really just sharing with us
00:27:33.98\00:27:36.48
what you do with Pure Reality.
00:27:36.52\00:27:37.85
It's an awesome ministry.
00:27:37.89\00:27:39.22
And we're gonna keep
you in prayer and just know
00:27:39.25\00:27:41.36
that God is gonna do
something amazing with this.
00:27:41.39\00:27:42.82
So, well, that's
our show for today
00:27:42.86\00:27:46.29
and I hope you enjoyed it,
00:27:46.33\00:27:47.66
and just remember
to always stay pure
00:27:47.70\00:27:50.47
and make pure choices.
00:27:50.50\00:27:52.53
Until next time, God bless.
00:27:52.57\00:27:54.57