Welcome to Pure Choices.
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So glad that you have
decided to join us today
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for another episode.
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Well, today, we're going
to be dealing with a topic
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that strikes at the
core of all of us I believe.
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But before we get into it,
I want to just take a minute
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and just introduce my co-hosts
who are here with me today.
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We have my friend
Pastor Alfonzo Greene
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who is here from
the Huntsville Church,
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Huntsville First
Seventh-day Adventist Church.
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We have Pastor Michael Polite
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who comes to us from Nashville,
Tennessee, the Riverside Chapel
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Seventh-day Adventist Church.
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My sister is back with us,
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Miss Lola Moore
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who serves as a pastor
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at the Oakwood
University Church.
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And then my
brother Michael B. Kelley,
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all the way from
Riverside, California,
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who is from the
Mt. Rubidoux Church.
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And I am your host
Pastor Seth Yelorda.
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And we're all glad to be
here. Am I correct in that?
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Yeah, of course, man.
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We're all glad to be here,
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and we're glad to be
discussing this topic.
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Now specifically,
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we want to deal with
something a little bit different
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than what we have
been dealing with.
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A lot of times,
up to this point,
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we've been dealing
with sexuality, sex,
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you know, dating, and
things of that nature.
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But today, we want to take
it just a little different,
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and we want to deal
specifically with fashion.
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We know that
the fashion industry
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in America is large
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and that there
are so many things
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behind the fashion
industry, so many agendas
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that drive the fashion industry,
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many of which
we can't even begin
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to tell the half of.
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But from what we do
know, let's just talk about it
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as far as fashion
and how fashion relates
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to our sexuality and
to our sexual expression.
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Let's talk about it.
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Well, the first thing,
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I recently was reading a
blog from a fashion expert,
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and they were
referring to a runway show
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that had just taken
place in New York City.
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And what was so interesting
is they were talking about
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how wonderful the
art was on the runway.
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And I just had to
step back and say,
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"Oh, wait a second."
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If they are
looking at fashion as art,
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then art is the
expression of oneself.
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Therefore, whatever
fashion I'm putting on
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is an
expression of the designer.
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It's their artistic
expression of themselves.
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So we now have
to look at fashion
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as I'm not putting on something
to just express myself,
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but I'm actually
putting on something
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that is expressing
the designer's viewpoints,
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his ideologies,
his philosophies,
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his or her sexual...
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View. View or orientation.
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So now fashion
takes on a different role,
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what am I
expressing for someone else
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is the major question.
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Yeah, I think that
makes a whole lot of sense
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because, I mean,
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this is kind of a
new phenomenon right now
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that I just can't
really get down with...
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Talk about it.
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Which is the pencil jeans, man.
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I mean, like...
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It's the jeans that...
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Skinny jeans.
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Well, skinny jeans would just...
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Yeah, they're
like real, real tight.
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It's the type of jeans
a guy could like put on.
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I mean, his girl
would have just wore it
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the day before
and he'll pick it up
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and then he'll put
those on the next day.
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I mean, there's a
problem with that.
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But it kind of piggybacks
off of what he would say
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as far as the
ideology behind it,
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which is the philosophy
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that there's no
distinction between the sexes.
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So my girl, she can
be wearing the same jeans
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that I'm wearing the next
day, and they're just as tight.
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Yeah, but I mean,
can we really say that?
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Because I mean,
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I'm sure some
young people are saying,
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"Jeans are jeans are
jeans are jeans," right?
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The pencil jeans? Right.
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So a young lady
might wear a T-shirt,
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you know, and then the next day,
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the young man might
wear the exact same T-shirt,
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does it mean that, okay,
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whatever a woman
wears a man cannot wear?
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Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah.
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So it's like... Yeah, yeah.
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I'm not trying
to take it that far.
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Let's not get that far.
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I'm just saying
though, man, this is so...
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This is about tight jeans.
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I'm speaking
about those tight jeans.
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That's fine. It's all good.
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It's all good.
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I'm not trying
to take it that far,
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let's stick to tight jeans.
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But let's ask a
question, let's ask a question.
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Skinny jeans, I think,
is an awesome place for us
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to start analyzing
sexuality in fashion.
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Okay.
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Who were skinny
jeans designed for?
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If you look at the
history of how skinny jeans
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came on the scene,
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started over in Europe,
made its way to the East Coast,
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hop-skipped everybody
and went to the West Coast.
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Skinny jeans...
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No, no, who were
they designed for?
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Everything was fitted.
They were designed for women.
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They were designed for women.
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That's when they
first came out on the scene.
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So how did they
all of a sudden make it
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into the male
mainstream of fashion?
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But at the same
time, originally,
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only women wore pink,
but now men wear pink.
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Is there an issue with men
wearing pink because pink...
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Was pink designed for women?
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No, that's a
color designed by God.
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You can't use the same.
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But I think
there's a principle...
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But it is something
that is so much more
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associated with women.
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And now men
wearing pink is like...
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My boy is like,
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"Jeans are
jeans, they're jeans."
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No, no, no. I
mean, the young person...
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These are jeans, man.
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But I'm thinking the
person picking them up,
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I mean, are they...
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I mean, are they
supposed to do the history
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and the research to determine,
okay, how were these created,
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who were these created for?
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Dude, if your jeans look like
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they've been painted on
your body, are you a man?
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There's something
wrong with that, man.
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But does it make a difference
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if the jeans are
painted on your body,
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they're so
tight, and you're a man,
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should a woman be
wearing those same jeans,
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where they're so tight
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it looks like
they're painted on your body?
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Well, man...
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No, the point
is, the point is...
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The point is I, as a male,
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should not be
shopping from the women's rack,
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that's the point.
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No, no, no, but they were
taken from the women's rack
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and put on the men's rack.
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I have to go back
because I don't think
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it's only they
were made for that...
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You know, especially if
you go back to the Europe,
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saying the jeans were made,
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you know, for the women
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because European
fashion had a different style.
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Their clothes would
be fitted for even males,
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they were made to work for males
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because what we do back
over here in North America
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is you never cross colors,
we didn't want anything to fit.
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Baggy. You know what I'm saying?
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If it fit, there was
something wrong with it.
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So whether it
was for men or women,
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Karl Kani, y'all remember that?
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The more baggy it
was, the better it was.
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But Europe had a
different type of feel.
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It was like, you know,
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we don't want it to be all over,
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we want us to
look fitted, clean cut.
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I think what y'all are
talking about is an extreme.
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But you have to... I
guess you're talking about...
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I'm sorry.
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You have to be in a
place of where you discern
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and utilize wisdom
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and understand
that even in Europe,
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there's a lot of homosexuality
in the fashion industry
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and a lot of
people who are designing
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are designing with an agenda.
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We may not have an agenda
when we put the clothes on,
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we may say, "Well, I
just like the clean fit,"
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you know, a lot of guys.
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And therefore some people look
really good in the clean fit,
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you know, than other guys
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but understand that
the designer has an agenda
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when they're
designing those jeans.
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So you're saying
that the designer
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is trying to feminize men?
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Well, absolutely
because you remember
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there was a unisex
movement some time ago,
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a unisex movement
where women and men
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were wearing the same haircuts,
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women and men were wearing
the same kind of cuts of jeans,
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you know, women
are starting to wear...
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well, were
starting to wear boxers
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and things like that.
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So what was
happening is they were blurring
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the distinction between genders.
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And once you start blurring
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the distinction between genders,
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then sexuality starts to make
some blurring of distinctions
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as well, it starts in one way...
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You're obviously
going... I don't know.
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Very much so.
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Come on! Come on!
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No, I just
think we have to be...
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You mean to
tell me you can't see
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that there's a
feminizing of men in the society
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and culture in general?
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And then there's a massive...
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The whole
metrosexual movement? No, no.
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Come on! That's fashion.
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No, but there's the thing.
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I don't think
what we can say is...
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I don't think we can say
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because I like my clothes
not to hang off my body...
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No, that's not what
we're saying, right?
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No, because remember,
there is something about...
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I know what y'all
are talking about.
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Where you can
barely walk in your jeans.
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No, we're talking about
00:08:30.74\00:08:32.07
when I can count the
change in your pocket
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when you walk down the street,
those jeans are too tight, man.
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But, you know,
I agree with that,
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but there are
other types of jeans
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that are very fitted,
that are not hanging off me,
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there are shirts
that do the same thing,
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I don't know
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if that's
necessarily feminizing.
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And that's why I just
want to be careful with that.
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But you're saying feminizing
from your point of view
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as a consumer,
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but I'm talking
about the manufacturer,
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I'm talking about the person
who's designing the jeans.
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You may not have that agenda
00:09:01.27\00:09:03.44
as you're picking
it off of the rack,
00:09:03.47\00:09:05.41
but the person
who's designing the jeans,
00:09:05.44\00:09:07.41
the person who's designing
a lot of the clothes...
00:09:07.44\00:09:09.58
And I mean, even if
we move off of the jeans
00:09:09.61\00:09:11.48
onto some of the
things that women are wearing,
00:09:11.51\00:09:14.15
the designer has an
agenda as they are doing that.
00:09:14.18\00:09:18.15
There's a message
that they believe is true,
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and they're
expressing that message as,
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I think Mike
brought out earlier,
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through the way
00:09:24.26\00:09:25.59
that they're
designing their fashion.
00:09:25.63\00:09:28.60
And we have to ensure
00:09:28.63\00:09:29.96
that we're not buying into that.
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I guess I just don't think that.
00:09:31.37\00:09:32.70
'Cause I agree with that.
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I think there's
absolutely a message
00:09:34.10\00:09:35.44
in different things, all that.
00:09:35.47\00:09:36.81
I just don't think
00:09:36.84\00:09:38.17
there are some jeans
and different things like
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that that have
that goal in mind.
00:09:39.57\00:09:41.44
But I don't think we should
say just because they fit...
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And they're tight.
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And they're
certain type of tight means
00:09:45.45\00:09:47.15
that that's what it is.
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The question then
becomes how tight is too tight.
00:09:48.55\00:09:50.52
There you go.
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I mean, you got to give
me some parameters like,
00:09:51.92\00:09:53.25
okay, you know?
00:09:53.29\00:09:54.62
So now it's the
semantics game? Yes, yes, yes.
00:09:54.66\00:09:56.93
So if you can see
the change in my pockets,
00:09:56.96\00:09:58.33
they're too tight,
00:09:58.36\00:09:59.69
but then it's like, okay,
well, how baggy is too baggy?
00:09:59.73\00:10:01.06
Come on, man. Come on!
00:10:01.10\00:10:02.60
You were talking about it, man.
00:10:02.63\00:10:04.73
You're just seeing some change
in some dude's pocket, man.
00:10:04.77\00:10:08.17
But it's fitted.
00:10:08.20\00:10:09.54
Some people think
anything that fits,
00:10:09.57\00:10:10.91
that's not hanging off you...
00:10:10.94\00:10:12.27
But I think,
here's a bad question...
00:10:12.31\00:10:13.64
No, we got a difference, man.
00:10:13.68\00:10:15.01
We got dudes walking around
looking like Peter Pan, okay?
00:10:15.04\00:10:18.08
That is unacceptable,
man. That's different though.
00:10:18.11\00:10:20.08
That is truly a blurring
of the line between genders.
00:10:20.12\00:10:23.28
Yeah. Let's bring it back.
00:10:23.32\00:10:24.65
But that's not the point though.
00:10:24.69\00:10:26.02
We'll just bring it
back to Pure Choices now.
00:10:26.05\00:10:27.62
Bring it all back
there, bring it all back.
00:10:27.66\00:10:30.26
How is that one's dress,
00:10:30.29\00:10:32.79
and let's say, their
preference of fashion,
00:10:32.83\00:10:35.83
because not everyone
00:10:35.86\00:10:37.20
has the same
preference of fashion,
00:10:37.23\00:10:38.57
so their preference of fashion
00:10:38.60\00:10:39.93
has anything to
do with their goal
00:10:39.97\00:10:42.30
or pursuit for purity.
00:10:42.34\00:10:44.17
Let me say this
00:10:44.21\00:10:45.54
'cause I think
it's a good piggyback
00:10:45.57\00:10:46.91
on what you both just said that,
00:10:46.94\00:10:48.74
you know, the Peter Pan jeans,
00:10:48.78\00:10:50.11
let's say, and
blurring the gender,
00:10:50.15\00:10:51.71
see that implies
00:10:51.75\00:10:53.48
that a woman should
be able to wear jeans
00:10:53.52\00:10:56.85
that are that tight
00:10:56.89\00:10:58.22
that it's acceptable for women
to show off certain things,
00:10:58.25\00:11:02.72
but if a guy
does it, it blurs it.
00:11:02.76\00:11:04.53
So I think the better
question would be what is it
00:11:04.56\00:11:07.30
that that would be saying?
00:11:07.33\00:11:09.56
It is accentuating
different parts of the body,
00:11:09.60\00:11:11.47
maybe that's
the kind of message,
00:11:11.50\00:11:13.00
not only just
blurring the genders
00:11:13.03\00:11:14.37
but I want you to
become a little more honed
00:11:14.40\00:11:16.91
in certain things.
00:11:16.94\00:11:18.27
And I think with
the skinny jeans,
00:11:18.31\00:11:19.87
I mean, we might need
to talk about that too
00:11:19.91\00:11:21.58
because with these guys,
00:11:21.61\00:11:22.94
with these fitted
jeans and fitted pants,
00:11:22.98\00:11:25.55
there's some accentuation
of their parts as well
00:11:25.58\00:11:28.18
that we don't talk about that.
00:11:28.22\00:11:29.85
You know, I had to love...
00:11:29.88\00:11:31.95
There's some accentuation
going on there as well.
00:11:31.99\00:11:35.32
And I think that's why
00:11:35.36\00:11:36.69
we have to be
mindful of who is designing.
00:11:36.73\00:11:39.59
You know, there
were some studies done
00:11:39.63\00:11:42.20
on young girls,
00:11:42.23\00:11:43.93
and we're talking
about Pure Choices,
00:11:43.97\00:11:46.23
so I'm going to
just take it there,
00:11:46.27\00:11:48.30
and the material that
was used in their underwear.
00:11:48.34\00:11:51.74
And it was
shown that young girls
00:11:51.77\00:11:53.48
when they were
using the cotton underwear
00:11:53.51\00:11:56.48
that they were less prone
to sexuality, things like that.
00:11:56.51\00:11:58.98
But then it was the
satins and things like that,
00:11:59.01\00:12:01.18
the more soft,
00:12:01.22\00:12:02.55
you know, more sexual
types that was moving...
00:12:02.58\00:12:05.19
And these are young girls.
00:12:05.22\00:12:06.55
So grandma
underwear versus like...
00:12:06.59\00:12:09.49
you know. Yeah.
00:12:09.52\00:12:10.86
And I mean...
Lady Gaga underwear...
00:12:10.89\00:12:12.29
And I'm taking it there
00:12:12.33\00:12:13.70
because the way
that we wear our clothes,
00:12:13.73\00:12:17.10
the way that
the clothes interact
00:12:17.13\00:12:19.10
with our bodies,
00:12:19.13\00:12:20.47
there are certain
phenomenon that go on in us.
00:12:20.50\00:12:23.71
Yeah, there is
definitely a trend,
00:12:23.74\00:12:25.07
and I've seen in media
00:12:25.11\00:12:26.44
that they are
trying to sexualize
00:12:26.47\00:12:30.08
young girls' clothing.
00:12:30.11\00:12:31.65
You know, and they're
always talking about it,
00:12:31.68\00:12:33.31
especially certain talks
shows are always talking about
00:12:33.35\00:12:36.45
why are young
girls being sexualized
00:12:36.48\00:12:39.59
and wearing
certain clothes means
00:12:39.62\00:12:40.96
so certain clothes
and what does that...
00:12:40.99\00:12:44.03
What they're saying is it begins
00:12:44.06\00:12:45.39
the process of their sexual,
00:12:45.43\00:12:47.93
emotional development
sooner than necessary.
00:12:47.96\00:12:50.30
Absolutely.
00:12:50.33\00:12:51.67
But again, I want to
bring the question back
00:12:51.70\00:12:53.03
to how does one's selection
00:12:53.07\00:12:56.67
or choice for
fashion reflect their desire
00:12:56.71\00:13:00.14
or their aspiration for purity.
00:13:00.18\00:13:02.34
There's a joke that says
00:13:02.38\00:13:04.08
what's the difference between
a bikini and barbed wire, okay?
00:13:04.11\00:13:09.32
The punch line is both protect
00:13:09.35\00:13:11.89
the property without
obstructing the view.
00:13:11.92\00:13:15.49
Wow.
00:13:15.52\00:13:16.99
How it ties in is what
we're doing is we are...
00:13:17.03\00:13:21.26
You're stopping...
00:13:21.30\00:13:22.63
Wow!
00:13:22.66\00:13:24.33
What it's doing
is we are taking away
00:13:24.37\00:13:26.60
the obstruction of view
as things get more fitted.
00:13:26.63\00:13:31.44
And I mean, we're
kind of dancing around it,
00:13:31.47\00:13:33.27
but let's be honest,
00:13:33.31\00:13:34.64
if there is a homosexual male
00:13:34.68\00:13:38.68
designing
clothes for another male,
00:13:38.71\00:13:41.15
he's going to design clothes
00:13:41.18\00:13:42.95
that he wants to
see that other male in.
00:13:42.98\00:13:45.09
Absolutely. Okay?
00:13:45.12\00:13:46.45
If a woman is buying
00:13:46.49\00:13:49.02
some clothes off the
rack to gain attention,
00:13:49.06\00:13:51.99
okay, what's
going to gain attention?
00:13:52.03\00:13:54.16
Well, the less obstructed view
00:13:54.20\00:13:56.87
is going to gain
the most attention.
00:13:56.90\00:13:59.07
It pours into purity
00:13:59.10\00:14:00.80
because as the view
becomes less obstructed,
00:14:00.84\00:14:04.04
then I have more
access with my imagination
00:14:04.07\00:14:07.04
and that fuels my desires.
00:14:07.08\00:14:08.54
So, I mean, if
you're going there,
00:14:08.58\00:14:10.18
then what should
a young person do?
00:14:10.21\00:14:12.28
Because, I mean, sure,
00:14:12.31\00:14:13.65
you're saying that
they should research
00:14:13.68\00:14:15.02
who made their clothes.
00:14:15.05\00:14:16.38
No, no.
00:14:16.42\00:14:17.75
I mean, my question
00:14:17.79\00:14:19.12
is what should a young person do
00:14:19.15\00:14:20.49
when it comes
to choosing clothes
00:14:20.52\00:14:22.29
in their pursuit of purity.
00:14:22.32\00:14:23.66
Well, here's the
thing, I think Mike is saying
00:14:23.69\00:14:26.23
that we're all
touching around something,
00:14:26.26\00:14:29.10
our clothes are going
to give a certain message,
00:14:29.13\00:14:31.60
and we got to ask
ourselves I might not know
00:14:31.63\00:14:33.50
what the designer
had in mind and all that,
00:14:33.54\00:14:35.94
but even if the designer
had a certain thing in mind,
00:14:35.97\00:14:37.74
the way I package it
and put it together does,
00:14:37.77\00:14:40.68
at the end of the day,
send another type of message.
00:14:40.71\00:14:43.98
And so I think by
the types of things
00:14:44.01\00:14:45.45
that we decide to wear,
00:14:45.48\00:14:47.12
we're saying I'm
sending this message.
00:14:47.15\00:14:49.38
If I come outside the house
00:14:49.42\00:14:51.59
and my clothes are not
ironed and all that different...
00:14:51.62\00:14:54.26
I'm sending a message.
00:14:54.29\00:14:55.62
I come outside the
house and I'm showing off
00:14:55.66\00:14:57.69
as many different
things as possible,
00:14:57.73\00:14:59.46
I'm sending a message.
00:14:59.49\00:15:00.83
And we have to say,
00:15:00.86\00:15:02.20
"Is what I'm wearing
sending a pure message?"
00:15:02.23\00:15:04.37
And I think what's key with that
00:15:04.40\00:15:06.20
because the attitude
of a young person is that,
00:15:06.23\00:15:08.74
"Well, people
shouldn't be judging me."
00:15:08.77\00:15:10.64
But the reality is
that human nature naturally,
00:15:10.67\00:15:13.78
whoever you are,
00:15:13.81\00:15:15.14
you make
judgments and assess people
00:15:15.18\00:15:17.98
by what you see.
00:15:18.01\00:15:19.35
Right away. Two seconds.
00:15:19.38\00:15:20.72
So that's why when
you're going to a job interview,
00:15:20.75\00:15:22.08
you look a certain way,
00:15:22.12\00:15:23.45
people are making a
snap judgment about you.
00:15:23.49\00:15:25.09
You know, you even do
this with your friends.
00:15:25.12\00:15:26.45
You go to school, you look
and you see a certain person,
00:15:26.49\00:15:29.26
you make a snap,
00:15:29.29\00:15:30.63
instant judgment
on how they appear.
00:15:30.66\00:15:33.26
And so if we
want people to assess
00:15:33.29\00:15:35.06
and judge us in the right way,
00:15:35.10\00:15:36.43
we have to mindful
as far as what messages
00:15:36.46\00:15:37.87
we're sending in our clothes.
00:15:37.90\00:15:39.23
And I want to jump in and
touch back on another point
00:15:39.27\00:15:43.44
that the way that
we dress also sends
00:15:43.47\00:15:46.74
some messages to ourselves.
00:15:46.78\00:15:48.38
You think about
00:15:48.41\00:15:49.74
when you get
dressed up for charge,
00:15:49.78\00:15:51.51
you're wearing that clean suit,
00:15:51.55\00:15:52.88
you guys have the tie,
the little pocket piece,
00:15:52.91\00:15:54.85
you're clean, you
know you're clean.
00:15:54.88\00:15:57.02
The way you carry
yourself is reflected
00:15:57.05\00:15:59.09
by the way you're dressed.
00:15:59.12\00:16:00.46
You're sending
yourself a message.
00:16:00.49\00:16:02.32
Now if you're walking
around as a young woman,
00:16:02.36\00:16:04.93
you know, your clothes
are hanging off of you,
00:16:04.96\00:16:07.43
you know, there's a way
00:16:07.46\00:16:08.90
that you're
going to carry yourself
00:16:08.93\00:16:10.57
in that way too,
00:16:10.60\00:16:12.40
you're sending some messages
to your mind and your body
00:16:12.43\00:16:15.80
as to how you
should carry yourself
00:16:15.84\00:16:17.54
and how much
access another person
00:16:17.57\00:16:19.27
should have to you by
the way that you dress.
00:16:19.31\00:16:22.98
And when you see a woman,
00:16:23.01\00:16:25.21
you know, who's modestly dressed
00:16:25.25\00:16:26.58
but is clean, the way...
00:16:26.61\00:16:28.35
I mean, she's walking tall,
she's looking you in the eye,
00:16:28.38\00:16:31.05
she's carrying herself well,
00:16:31.09\00:16:32.79
but another woman
who's not dressed as well,
00:16:32.82\00:16:35.59
you know, she might be
more sexually active or...
00:16:35.62\00:16:39.06
Sensual under-dressing.
More sensual, that's the word.
00:16:39.09\00:16:41.73
Sensual in the way
that she comes off,
00:16:41.76\00:16:43.40
so the way that we
dress also may be a precursor
00:16:43.43\00:16:46.67
to impure choices.
00:16:46.70\00:16:48.50
Can I ask something because...
00:16:48.54\00:16:51.27
And let's bring it, you
know, to church a little bit,
00:16:51.31\00:16:53.38
and one of my boys
had this issue like, "Yo!
00:16:53.41\00:16:58.15
If we are blessed..."
00:16:58.18\00:17:00.42
Let's just say.
00:17:00.45\00:17:01.78
You know, we want to
look good 'cause I don't care.
00:17:01.82\00:17:03.15
When you say blessed...
00:17:03.18\00:17:04.52
I'm saying
different people are blessed
00:17:04.55\00:17:05.89
with different things.
00:17:05.92\00:17:07.26
Let me say what
are you talking about.
00:17:07.29\00:17:09.59
Nice smile.
Yeah, whatever it is.
00:17:09.62\00:17:12.29
Whatever it might mean.
00:17:12.33\00:17:13.66
So my thing is, let's be real,
00:17:13.70\00:17:15.26
the first thing we
see is not personality,
00:17:15.30\00:17:17.73
the first thing we
see is not character,
00:17:17.77\00:17:20.24
unfortunately, we're
attracted to somebody.
00:17:20.27\00:17:22.47
So some of the arguments
00:17:22.50\00:17:23.84
with some of the
people in church is,
00:17:23.87\00:17:25.21
you know, "I want
to, without being crude,
00:17:25.24\00:17:28.58
do the best I can to accentuate
what I've been blessed with."
00:17:28.61\00:17:31.58
How do you handle that?
00:17:31.61\00:17:32.95
Is there a balance between that?
00:17:32.98\00:17:34.32
What's over there?
00:17:34.35\00:17:35.68
I personally feel like
there's four types of dress
00:17:35.72\00:17:38.25
that anyone can wear,
00:17:38.29\00:17:39.62
and this might
somewhat answer your question.
00:17:39.65\00:17:41.16
There's four styles
that we can choose from.
00:17:41.19\00:17:42.89
The first is to just be covered,
00:17:42.92\00:17:45.03
like turtleneck,
you know, ankle skirt,
00:17:45.06\00:17:47.53
like you're
covered from head to toe.
00:17:47.56\00:17:49.36
You've got the Indian
garb on, you know, your eyes,
00:17:49.40\00:17:52.33
all they can see is your eyes.
00:17:52.37\00:17:53.70
You're covered,
they can see nothing.
00:17:53.74\00:17:55.07
You know, we might say
that's an extreme, you know.
00:17:55.10\00:17:57.34
And then the next level is
00:17:57.37\00:17:59.54
to wear
something that highlights.
00:17:59.57\00:18:01.58
And so you can wear a suit,
a certain shirt that highlights
00:18:01.61\00:18:05.18
certain aspects,
either your skin tone,
00:18:05.21\00:18:07.28
that color looks good on
your skin, or to highlight,
00:18:07.32\00:18:09.72
you know, they have
certain fitted shirts
00:18:09.75\00:18:11.09
that guys wear
00:18:11.12\00:18:12.45
where your chest
is not sticking out
00:18:12.49\00:18:13.82
but it just
highlights your figure,
00:18:13.86\00:18:16.22
not in a sensual way though.
00:18:16.26\00:18:17.86
Then there's
clothes that accentuate.
00:18:17.89\00:18:20.13
And so I can wear something
00:18:20.16\00:18:21.50
that will draw attention
to a certain part of my body.
00:18:21.53\00:18:24.83
I'm accentuating a certain part.
00:18:24.87\00:18:26.77
And then there's clothes
that just flat out reveal.
00:18:26.80\00:18:29.27
You know, it's not accentuating,
00:18:29.30\00:18:30.64
it's just revealing.
00:18:30.67\00:18:32.01
Like you don't even got
to use your imagination,
00:18:32.04\00:18:33.58
I can just see everything
God has blessed you with.
00:18:33.61\00:18:36.51
You know, so when
you look at those four,
00:18:36.54\00:18:38.85
you know,
categories from covering,
00:18:38.88\00:18:41.18
highlighting,
accentuating, and revealing,
00:18:41.22\00:18:44.39
where do you feel
like the Christian
00:18:44.42\00:18:46.62
who is striving for pure choices
00:18:46.65\00:18:48.39
should fall in their dress,
00:18:48.42\00:18:51.19
their wardrobe selection?
00:18:51.23\00:18:53.09
Wow. That's good.
00:18:53.13\00:18:54.46
That's a really good...
00:18:54.50\00:18:55.83
Yeah, I mean...
00:18:55.86\00:18:57.57
Do you think the setting
00:19:01.34\00:19:02.67
has something to
do with that though?
00:19:02.70\00:19:04.04
Like what?
00:19:04.07\00:19:05.41
Like is there a
place to accentuate...
00:19:05.44\00:19:06.78
Maybe you don't
accentuate in church.
00:19:06.81\00:19:08.14
What I'm asking is...
00:19:08.18\00:19:10.85
Is modesty
dependent upon your setting?
00:19:10.88\00:19:13.58
I mean, what...
00:19:13.62\00:19:15.05
I would say highlight.
00:19:15.08\00:19:17.92
I think the
Christians should strive
00:19:17.95\00:19:19.65
for highlighting, okay?
00:19:19.69\00:19:21.46
And based on the definition...
That was number two, right?
00:19:21.49\00:19:23.56
Yeah, based on your definition
00:19:23.59\00:19:25.59
you're using the
different color schemes,
00:19:25.63\00:19:28.46
you are bringing attention
to maybe your physique,
00:19:28.50\00:19:32.70
you may be tall,
00:19:32.73\00:19:34.07
so certain things may be
best to highlight your length,
00:19:34.10\00:19:37.27
maybe you're a little tubby,
00:19:37.31\00:19:38.64
so certain things will
take a little bit of pounds off,
00:19:38.67\00:19:41.24
you know. So I
think highlighting...
00:19:41.28\00:19:42.61
But you're not drawing attention
00:19:42.64\00:19:43.98
to a specific body part.
00:19:44.01\00:19:45.35
You're not accentuating
00:19:45.38\00:19:46.72
your chest or your
legs or your backside.
00:19:46.75\00:19:49.68
And I wanted to say though that,
00:19:49.72\00:19:51.05
I mean, for the Christian
00:19:51.09\00:19:52.42
that's trying
to represent Christ
00:19:52.45\00:19:53.79
and understanding as
we've talked about earlier,
00:19:53.82\00:19:55.42
the nature of just,
00:19:55.46\00:19:58.03
you know, lust and trying
to be pure in our thinking,
00:19:58.06\00:20:01.50
wouldn't we want
to portray something
00:20:01.53\00:20:03.93
that would not lead someone
to think lustful thoughts.
00:20:03.97\00:20:06.23
And I know the
argument could be, well...
00:20:06.27\00:20:07.94
Well, they shouldn't
be thinking them anyway.
00:20:07.97\00:20:09.30
Right, I was going to say...
00:20:09.34\00:20:10.91
Or anyone can't
think lustful thoughts
00:20:10.94\00:20:12.27
and you could be...
00:20:12.31\00:20:13.64
You can be covered,
00:20:13.68\00:20:15.01
they'll still
get lustful thoughts.
00:20:15.04\00:20:16.38
Shouldn't our attitude be
00:20:16.41\00:20:17.75
to try to do our best
though in that regard?
00:20:17.78\00:20:19.18
And that would be not revealing
those parts that are sexual...
00:20:19.21\00:20:21.52
So what should be
the thought process?
00:20:21.55\00:20:24.02
And I'll ask
Pastor Moore as a woman,
00:20:24.05\00:20:26.92
and then we can answer as a man.
00:20:26.96\00:20:28.29
What should be
the thought process
00:20:28.32\00:20:29.66
for a woman
00:20:29.69\00:20:31.03
when she gets up in the morning
and she's getting dressed
00:20:31.06\00:20:32.39
and she's going
through her wardrobe?
00:20:32.43\00:20:33.76
You know, I was
listening to what Kelley
00:20:33.80\00:20:36.06
was saying earlier
as he talked about,
00:20:36.10\00:20:38.57
you know, a person
wanting to be attractive.
00:20:38.60\00:20:41.77
And my thought goes
to fancy restaurants.
00:20:41.80\00:20:44.51
You know, well, you
all have been there,
00:20:44.54\00:20:46.17
you've taken your
wives to fancy restaurants
00:20:46.21\00:20:48.04
and you pay these high
exorbitant prices for a meal.
00:20:48.08\00:20:51.48
But as you look at the meal,
00:20:51.51\00:20:52.85
you're really not
paying for the food
00:20:52.88\00:20:54.88
because they don't really
00:20:54.92\00:20:56.25
put a whole lot of
food on your plates.
00:20:56.28\00:20:58.39
What you're paying
for is the presentation.
00:20:58.42\00:21:01.26
The way that they
arrange the carrots
00:21:01.29\00:21:03.56
and arrange the parsley
and everything like that.
00:21:03.59\00:21:06.03
You're paying
for the presentation.
00:21:06.06\00:21:08.86
And I think that
same thing ought to be
00:21:08.90\00:21:10.60
when we go in our
closets, we're looking,
00:21:10.63\00:21:12.50
we're presenting ourselves
well but not overdoing it.
00:21:12.53\00:21:15.10
You know what I mean?
00:21:15.14\00:21:16.47
A restaurant could say,
00:21:16.50\00:21:17.84
"Well, we got carrots
00:21:17.87\00:21:19.21
and I want to
show off my carrots,
00:21:19.24\00:21:20.58
so we've just got a
plate full of carrots."
00:21:20.61\00:21:21.94
You're not paying
$95 for that, you know?
00:21:21.98\00:21:24.31
In the same way,
when we go in our closets,
00:21:24.35\00:21:26.25
we're finding things
that accentuate our beauty
00:21:26.28\00:21:28.95
but that don't overdo it.
00:21:28.98\00:21:30.79
You know what I mean?
That don't show off things.
00:21:30.82\00:21:34.02
I heard someone say
00:21:34.06\00:21:35.89
very, very well a
couple of weeks ago
00:21:35.92\00:21:38.66
that you should
not advertise something
00:21:38.69\00:21:40.60
that you're not willing to sell.
00:21:40.63\00:21:43.67
And if you're working on
advertising certain things,
00:21:43.70\00:21:46.17
then, you know, are
you willing to sell it?
00:21:46.20\00:21:48.40
If that's not what
you're trying to do,
00:21:48.44\00:21:49.77
if you're not out
there trying to sell stuff,
00:21:49.80\00:21:51.14
then you
shouldn't be advertising.
00:21:51.17\00:21:52.51
So as a woman,
00:21:52.54\00:21:53.88
when, a young
woman, a young adult,
00:21:53.91\00:21:55.24
you go into your closet
and you should be thinking
00:21:55.28\00:21:58.01
when I put this dress
on, when I put this suit on,
00:21:58.05\00:22:00.25
when I put these jeans
on, the thought process,
00:22:00.28\00:22:02.65
my thought process
should be, you know...
00:22:02.68\00:22:05.92
And I mean without going there,
00:22:05.95\00:22:08.02
I mean, I personally
when I go into my closet,
00:22:08.06\00:22:13.06
I want to present the
whole of Lola Moore well.
00:22:13.09\00:22:17.20
I'm not wanting someone
00:22:17.23\00:22:18.57
to look at me
and to think of sex.
00:22:18.60\00:22:20.44
You know, if I want to be sexy,
00:22:20.47\00:22:21.84
then I'm wanting
someone to look at me
00:22:21.87\00:22:23.27
and think about sex.
00:22:23.30\00:22:24.64
I'm not wanting a person
00:22:24.67\00:22:26.01
to just want to
have sex with me.
00:22:26.04\00:22:27.38
I want them to want to
have a conversation with me,
00:22:27.41\00:22:29.44
so we want to go
to the store with,
00:22:29.48\00:22:30.85
to want to go to
the park with me,
00:22:30.88\00:22:32.51
to have a whole,
00:22:32.55\00:22:33.88
you know, gamut of
experience with me.
00:22:33.92\00:22:35.88
What presents the
whole of Lola Moore well,
00:22:35.92\00:22:39.25
the whole of me well?
00:22:39.29\00:22:40.66
Not just one part.
00:22:40.69\00:22:42.09
You know, not just my behind
or, you know, the whole of me.
00:22:42.12\00:22:45.99
And as I go into my closet,
00:22:46.03\00:22:47.36
I want to
present all of me well.
00:22:47.40\00:22:50.07
I was going to say something
from a male perspective.
00:22:50.10\00:22:51.43
From a male
perspective, what do you think?
00:22:51.47\00:22:52.80
Well, I just want to
say that just for the women,
00:22:52.83\00:22:54.97
the young women out
there, whoever is watching,
00:22:55.00\00:22:57.01
they see and understand
00:22:57.04\00:22:58.37
that men don't
necessarily have to see it all
00:22:58.41\00:23:02.31
to find you sexually attractive.
00:23:02.34\00:23:05.28
There are ways that
you can carry yourself
00:23:05.31\00:23:08.12
in a sophisticated
way, like highlighting,
00:23:08.15\00:23:10.92
doing whatever that men
will find very attractive
00:23:10.95\00:23:14.16
and actually
will raise their level
00:23:14.19\00:23:16.69
because they
realize that the way
00:23:16.73\00:23:18.06
you carry yourself,
you've just got to come...
00:23:18.09\00:23:19.96
you've got to come
at you a certain way.
00:23:20.00\00:23:21.63
And you kind of can
tell the difference.
00:23:21.66\00:23:23.30
And, ladies, I just
got to be real with you.
00:23:23.33\00:23:25.00
I mean, if you're not
trying to present this message,
00:23:25.03\00:23:28.37
a guy will look at
you and kind of go,
00:23:28.40\00:23:30.34
"I really don't
have to do that much,
00:23:30.37\00:23:32.87
you know, to really
try to do anything."
00:23:32.91\00:23:34.24
They can just look at
you and kind of tell that.
00:23:34.28\00:23:35.61
And then there's other sisters,
00:23:35.64\00:23:36.98
they way they carry themselves
and the way that they look,
00:23:37.01\00:23:39.85
you're kind of like, "Hmm, I
got to kind of raise my level
00:23:39.88\00:23:42.22
if I'm going to be
able to approach her."
00:23:42.25\00:23:43.59
So...
00:23:43.62\00:23:44.95
So what do you
think the thought process
00:23:44.99\00:23:46.32
should be for a man,
00:23:46.35\00:23:47.69
a young guy when he
goes into his closet,
00:23:47.72\00:23:49.06
he's putting on his,
he's putting on his jeans,
00:23:49.09\00:23:50.63
you know, he's
throwing on his tams,
00:23:50.66\00:23:52.19
whatever he's putting on,
00:23:52.23\00:23:53.56
what should be
going through his mind?
00:23:53.60\00:23:54.93
You know, and I hate to say
that it is a double standard
00:23:54.96\00:23:58.03
and it has to be for this reason
00:23:58.07\00:23:59.93
because we can't
keep using the argument
00:23:59.97\00:24:01.54
that men are
more visual than women
00:24:01.57\00:24:04.87
and then be overly concerned,
well, what's she going to see
00:24:04.91\00:24:08.08
because we've always
been trained and taught
00:24:08.11\00:24:10.08
that they're not really
00:24:10.11\00:24:11.65
completely concerned about that.
00:24:11.68\00:24:13.01
However, I think
00:24:13.05\00:24:14.38
the same principle should apply.
00:24:14.42\00:24:15.75
However, at the same time,
00:24:15.78\00:24:17.79
you know, what we wear
might not have as great
00:24:17.82\00:24:20.12
as an effect,
00:24:20.16\00:24:21.49
but we should
still keep that mindful
00:24:21.52\00:24:22.86
because every
woman is different.
00:24:22.89\00:24:24.23
There are some women
who are extremely visual,
00:24:24.26\00:24:25.59
hence the reason,
00:24:25.63\00:24:26.96
you know, the models
00:24:27.00\00:24:28.50
and, you know, all those
stuff are built a certain way.
00:24:28.53\00:24:31.57
You know, it's not
necessarily for me,
00:24:31.60\00:24:33.40
you know, it's
because I get the idea
00:24:33.44\00:24:35.57
if I wear that underwear,
00:24:35.60\00:24:37.34
you know, some people think
00:24:37.37\00:24:38.71
their muscles will get that way.
00:24:38.74\00:24:40.08
And if my muscles get
that way, then maybe this,
00:24:40.11\00:24:41.68
you know, female will be...
00:24:41.71\00:24:43.04
I've just never
seen an out-of-shape dude
00:24:43.08\00:24:44.88
on the underwear
ad, I've never seen it.
00:24:44.91\00:24:46.95
Do you feel like
00:24:46.98\00:24:48.32
that's really like
dudes' problem though,
00:24:48.35\00:24:49.92
like brothers' problem though?
00:24:49.95\00:24:52.15
Like really always
wearing muscular stuff?
00:24:52.19\00:24:54.39
Is that really the main problem
that we see with young brothers
00:24:54.42\00:24:57.19
as far as it
relates to presentation?
00:24:57.23\00:24:58.96
It's ego.
00:24:58.99\00:25:00.36
That's the major
problem. I think it's that.
00:25:00.40\00:25:02.80
Yeah, I definitely
think it's ego and wanting to
00:25:02.83\00:25:05.03
because we
unfortunately as brothers
00:25:05.07\00:25:07.37
I think have
attached a lot of our
00:25:07.40\00:25:09.60
who we are to what kind of shoes
00:25:09.64\00:25:11.81
we have on, to what
kind of gear we have.
00:25:11.84\00:25:14.28
And that's why,
00:25:14.31\00:25:15.64
you know, if you
notice, a lot of,
00:25:15.68\00:25:17.01
I think sometimes
the African-American,
00:25:17.05\00:25:18.38
it really accentuates
00:25:18.41\00:25:19.75
who is wearing
Rocawear, this brand,
00:25:19.78\00:25:22.15
being this, this is what I have
because we connected it to...
00:25:22.18\00:25:23.55
or whatever.
00:25:23.59\00:25:24.92
Exactly.
00:25:24.95\00:25:26.29
You know, I will say this,
and there's a Bible text that,
00:25:26.32\00:25:27.66
you know, really
sums up in my mind,
00:25:27.69\00:25:29.02
you know, whatever
you do, eat, or you drink,
00:25:29.06\00:25:31.49
do all to the glory of God.
00:25:31.53\00:25:33.03
And I that when you
go into your closet,
00:25:33.06\00:25:34.40
whether you're male of female
00:25:34.43\00:25:35.76
that that needs to be at
the forefront of your mind
00:25:35.80\00:25:37.13
as an individual you
think you're an adult
00:25:37.17\00:25:38.93
who are striving to glorify
God and to live a pure life,
00:25:38.97\00:25:42.47
I don't want to put on anything
00:25:42.50\00:25:43.84
that's going to
be a stumbling block,
00:25:43.87\00:25:45.21
that when people see me,
00:25:45.24\00:25:46.57
they are just so
fixated on my figure,
00:25:46.61\00:25:48.98
my shape, my
muscles, my cut, whatever,
00:25:49.01\00:25:51.31
that they can't hear a
word I'm saying to them,
00:25:51.35\00:25:54.12
like I'm talking to them
00:25:54.15\00:25:55.48
but all they can do is just like
00:25:55.52\00:25:56.99
they're just looking at me.
00:25:57.02\00:25:58.79
So I want my life,
you know, to be, yes,
00:25:58.82\00:26:02.52
I want to dress well
00:26:02.56\00:26:03.89
and I want to carry myself well,
00:26:03.93\00:26:05.26
I want to be clean and clean cut
00:26:05.29\00:26:06.66
because I want to
let people know, listen,
00:26:06.70\00:26:08.70
I'm representing God, you know.
00:26:08.73\00:26:10.13
But at the same time,
00:26:10.17\00:26:11.50
I don't want, you know, to be...
00:26:11.53\00:26:15.74
I don't want to get to the point
00:26:15.77\00:26:17.11
where when people see me,
00:26:17.14\00:26:18.47
they get blinded by me and
they can no longer see God.
00:26:18.51\00:26:21.08
Yo, I receive it.
00:26:21.11\00:26:22.44
And what's at
the core of the point
00:26:22.48\00:26:25.25
you just made is
00:26:25.28\00:26:27.22
the purity issue is
really about feeling responsible
00:26:27.25\00:26:30.52
for someone else's wellbeing.
00:26:30.55\00:26:31.92
That's true.
00:26:31.95\00:26:33.29
That's what
purity is really about.
00:26:33.32\00:26:34.96
I'm not going to have
sex with you before marriage
00:26:34.99\00:26:38.19
because I care
not only about myself
00:26:38.23\00:26:40.80
and my wellbeing but
about your wellbeing.
00:26:40.83\00:26:42.86
That's when we truly
start touching the purity.
00:26:42.90\00:26:45.23
We got to take the
same thing into fashion,
00:26:45.27\00:26:47.40
whether male or female,
00:26:47.44\00:26:49.04
we have to start feeling
00:26:49.07\00:26:50.41
as if I have a
responsibility to your wellbeing
00:26:50.44\00:26:53.58
and therefore I'm going to
carry myself, dress myself,
00:26:53.61\00:26:57.71
show myself in a specific way.
00:26:57.75\00:26:59.45
So I'm not just
living unto myself.
00:26:59.48\00:27:00.82
No. No.
00:27:00.85\00:27:02.18
And, you know, Jim Rome,
00:27:02.22\00:27:03.75
you know, he
does sports on radio,
00:27:03.79\00:27:05.12
and, you know, you
see the football players
00:27:05.15\00:27:06.49
and how they wear
those things around their...
00:27:06.52\00:27:08.26
and they like to
have their outfits right?
00:27:08.29\00:27:09.86
He says there's a
mentality they have, look good,
00:27:09.89\00:27:13.40
feel good, play good.
00:27:13.43\00:27:14.90
And I think we got to be...
00:27:14.93\00:27:16.26
You know, if you
dress a certain way
00:27:16.30\00:27:18.23
to an interview, you
feel good about yourself,
00:27:18.27\00:27:19.80
sometimes you're
interviewed better.
00:27:19.83\00:27:21.27
I think the
flipside is with purity too.
00:27:21.30\00:27:23.10
If I'm not
necessarily dressing pure,
00:27:23.14\00:27:25.51
then my mentality is...
00:27:25.54\00:27:26.88
Might not be pure.
00:27:26.91\00:27:28.24
Might not be pure either,
00:27:28.28\00:27:29.61
which will lead
to impure actions.
00:27:29.64\00:27:30.98
I'm rolling in her
straight up as sexy
00:27:31.01\00:27:33.45
or as revealing as can be...
00:27:33.48\00:27:34.82
Pants sagging, whatever.
00:27:34.85\00:27:36.18
My mentality is
going right there.
00:27:36.22\00:27:37.55
Your mindset... In
all different ways.
00:27:37.59\00:27:39.65
You know, this is
a good conversation,
00:27:39.69\00:27:41.02
and I'm glad we had it.
00:27:41.06\00:27:42.39
I pray that for our viewers
00:27:42.42\00:27:43.76
that you took
something away from it,
00:27:43.79\00:27:45.13
that you learned
00:27:45.16\00:27:46.49
that we want you
to make pure choices
00:27:46.53\00:27:47.86
even in the
clothes that you wear.
00:27:47.90\00:27:49.76
Can't judge a book by its cover,
00:27:49.80\00:27:51.13
we know, but, man,
00:27:51.17\00:27:52.50
the package does reveal
00:27:52.53\00:27:53.87
so much about what's going on
in the conscience of the heart.
00:27:53.90\00:27:55.27
And so we just admonish
you to make pure choices
00:27:55.30\00:27:58.54
when it comes to your dress.
00:27:58.57\00:28:00.14
Hopefully, we'll
see you next week.
00:28:00.18\00:28:01.51
Be blessed.
00:28:01.54\00:28:02.88
Tell someone else
about this program,
00:28:02.91\00:28:04.25
bring them along
00:28:04.28\00:28:05.61
so they can watch and
be blessed just the same.
00:28:05.65\00:28:06.98
Follow us on
Facebook, Pure Choices.
00:28:07.02\00:28:08.35
We'd love to talk to
you, have more conversations.
00:28:08.38\00:28:10.25
Hopefully, we'll
see you next week.
00:28:10.29\00:28:11.62
See you then. Bye-bye.
00:28:11.65\00:28:12.99