Hello, I'd like to welcome you
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once again to
"Books of the Book."
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How do you get along
with someone you don't like
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or who doesn't like you rather?
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Throughout this
series, we're focusing
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on the Epistles of Peter
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and digging deeper
into his teachings.
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I'd like to introduce
you to Dr. Tom Shepherd
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who's come all the way
from Andrews University
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to join us in this study.
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So, Dr. Shepherd,
how do you get along
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with someone
who's not nice to you?
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Well, that's a great question
and our passage talking about
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this is in the
Book of 1 Peter 3:8-12.
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So we want to
read that passage first
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so that we can get an idea.
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"Finally, all of
you be of one mind,
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having
compassion for one another,
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love as
brothers, be tenderhearted,
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be courteous, not
returning evil for evil
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or reviling for reviling,
but on the contrary blessing,
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knowing that you
were called to this,
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that you may inherit a blessing.
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For 'He who would love
life and see good days,
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and let him refrain
his tongue from evil,
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and his lips
from speaking deceit.
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Let him turn away
from evil and do good,
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let him seek
peace and pursue it.
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For the eyes of the
Lord are on the righteous
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and His ears are
open to their prayers,
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but the face of the Lord
is against those who do evil."
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Mm-hmm. All right.
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That's very clear. Yes.
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It's a great passage.
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Now, it's kind of
interesting though
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because the passage
begins with the word finally.
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And he's only about
half way through the book.
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So people they say,
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"Why in the world does he
say finally, that we started?"
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Well, it's seen
by some commentators
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as the ending of
this section of the book.
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So it can also be seen though
as parallel to the next section
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and so it's kind of
transitional in nature.
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What is the meaning here in
the list in verse 8 he gives?
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Well, let's look
at verse 8 again.
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Let's read verse 8 again
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because he has quite a
few things that he quotes,
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you know, bang, bang, bang,
bang, bang, bang, all at once.
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It says, "Finally,
all of you be of one mind,
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having
compassion for one another,
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love as brothers, be
tenderhearted, be courteous."
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There's actually
a set of five terms
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that are listed here, okay.
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They are to be like
minded, to have sympathy,
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to have true friendship
or true brotherly love,
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to have compassion,
and to be humble minded.
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Now four of the five terms
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are found only here
in the New Testament.
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So it's kind of surprising.
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But they express ideas
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that are routed in the
teachings of Jesus, okay.
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And they have
very strong parallels
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to the Book of
Romans Chapter 12 as well.
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The words come in
the form of a chiasm.
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Now a chiasm is--the name chiasm
comes from the Greek letter,
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Chia, which is
like an X, all right.
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So when you have a chiasm,
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things start and then they
move towards a central point
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and then they move back out
again from that central point.
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This is a very common
way in the Old Testament
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and in the New Testament, too,
very Hebraic way of thinking
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where you put the
most important point
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right in the middle, all right.
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So if you look at these phrases,
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you'll notice that
the very first one,
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remember there's five of them,
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so which one's gonna be
the important, middle one?
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Number three.
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All right, so you look
at the very first one says
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to be like minded
and the last one says
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to be humble minded, okay.
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So two mindsets,
humble minded and like minded.
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The second concept is sympathy
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and the fourth
concept is compassion.
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Sympathy and compassion,
they go hand in hand together.
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Well, so then what is
this great middle term?
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It is the word Philadelphia.
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The word brotherly kindness
or we might say, true friendship
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which is at the heart of
the Christians relationship
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to other people around them.
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But there's not
only this interesting
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focus on true
friendship and true kindness,
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but at the-- the very last thing
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that's mentioned of the five
characteristics is humility,
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to be humble minded.
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Now remember this was
an honor-shame society,
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so you strove for
things that gave you honor
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and you avoided
things that gave you shame.
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Well, humility was not
the way of honor, you see.
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And so it's very interesting
that the New Testament
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and the Lord
Jesus and His apostles
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as seen here
emphasize this idea of humility.
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Again it's this
topsy-turvy view of values.
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It's being
conscious of God's values
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rather than
conscious of what the world,
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you know, wants you to follow.
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Let's look at verse 9.
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Peter doesn't stop
there because in verse 9
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he describes
opposing relationships.
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Yes, got to get
along with the rascal.
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How to get
along with the rascal?
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Okay, let's read verse 9 again.
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"Not returning evil for
evil or reviling for reviling,
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but on the contrary blessing,
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knowing that you
were called to this,
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that you may
inherit a blessing."
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Yeah, this refers likely to
relationships with outsiders,
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people outside
the Christian church.
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And it's amazing how much
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actually Peter
focuses on relationships
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that you would have with people
who are not within the church.
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When we talk about church life,
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we tend to focus our
attention inward a whole lot.
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Sometimes we
speak of it as in reach,
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but we fail too
many times to have
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linkages with
people outside the church.
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And Peter is filled with this
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where you're having
relationships with these people.
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Now, of course,
the relationship here
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that's being described is
not a friendly one, is it?
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It's a contrary one,
somebody who is reviling you
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and they are saying
nasty things about you.
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This is very parallel to
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what the Apostle Paul
says in the Book of Romans.
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So we want to turn over
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to Romans Chapter 12
and read verses 14-21.
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Romans 12:14-21.
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It's interesting how parallel
it is which might suggest
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that it was a common
enough experience of Christians
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that you would have these
similar kind of experiences.
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Romans 12:14-21.
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"Bless those who persecute
you, bless and do not curse.
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Rejoice with those who rejoice
and weep with those who weep.
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Be of the same
mind toward one another.
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Do not set your
mind on high things,
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but associate with the humble.
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Do not be wise
in your own opinion.
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Repay no one evil for evil.
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Have regard for good
things in the sight of all men.
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If it is possible, as
much as depends on you,
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live peaceably with all men.
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Beloved, do not
avenge yourselves,
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but rather give place to
wrath, for it is written,
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'Vengeance is Mine, I
will repay,' says the Lord.
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Therefore, if your
enemy is hungry, feed him,
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if he is
thirsty, give him a drink.
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For in so doing you will
heap coals of fire on his head.
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Do not be overcome by evil,
but overcome evil with good."
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So basically don't take revenge.
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Don't take revenge.
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Be peacemakers what he's saying.
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Yes, and a bit more than that.
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It's interesting
how it's so parallel
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to what Peter has to
say almost like the reading
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from the same
page and we'll notice
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what this same page is that
they're reading from in a moment
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but there is this very strong
emphasis on not repaying people
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when they do you wrong. Mm-hmm.
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Now most of us in life
have somewhere along the line,
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some experience where
somebody mistreats us.
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And it's hard to take.
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It's hard to accept
the natural human reaction
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when you've done wrong is
to be angry and to hit back.
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Just the natural thing, I mean.
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When you talk to two little kids
and you're breaking up a fight,
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you'd say, "Well,
what happened here?"
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"Well, he started it," you know.
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"He hit me first," is
what they'll say, you know.
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And so I hit him back, you know.
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Just tit for tat.
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I mean, we see this in
world politics as well.
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How can you break the
cycle of violence and vengeance?
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You see that's the question.
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Well, the Apostle Paul says--
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he quotes this
scripture and says
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that "You're not
supposed to avenge yourself,
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but you are to leave
things to the wrath of God.
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For it is written,
'vengeance is mine,
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I will repay
it, says the Lord.'"
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Now some people get the idea
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that the wrath of God is
some kind of evil characteristic
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and that, you know, some
backward sort of view of God,
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because God is love, you
can't speak of his wrath.
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Actually, God's wrath
is His holy hatred of sin.
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There's nothing ugly about it.
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There's nothing impure about it.
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It's good and it's righteous.
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And God is the one
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who will set all
accounts straight.
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So Paul says,
"Leave that to God."
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He just states though
vengeance is too heavy
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of a weight for us to carry,
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so we must give it to Him.
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And let Him be in charge of."
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That is the same kind
of idea that Peter says.
00:10:36.82\00:10:40.51
He says, "When
somebody does you wrong,
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don't repay them evil.
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Don't give
reviling for reviling."
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We're reminded of 1 Peter 2.
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He says, "But on
the contrary, bless,
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for to this you were called
that you may obtain a blessing."
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I remember the experience
in life and my wife and, well,
00:10:59.42\00:11:03.18
my wife and I
had, but it was mainly
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an experience
that related to me.
00:11:04.61\00:11:07.52
I won't say who it was,
where it was, or when it was.
00:11:07.55\00:11:11.95
So it's one of those
interesting experiences in life
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though that you
kind of never forget.
00:11:15.57\00:11:18.74
I was in charge
of taking some people
00:11:18.77\00:11:20.44
around to homes for meals.
00:11:20.47\00:11:25.34
I had two high
officials with me.
00:11:25.37\00:11:29.24
And I was scheduled to
go to a particular home.
00:11:29.27\00:11:31.94
I was away from
home with these officials
00:11:31.97\00:11:33.75
and I was supposed to
go to these people's home.
00:11:33.78\00:11:36.71
And they had been
asked to provide lunch, okay.
00:11:36.74\00:11:42.07
Unfortunately, I had
offended this family.
00:11:42.10\00:11:44.76
I had done something
wrong and I think I'd blown it,
00:11:44.79\00:11:48.08
I'd done something wrong.
00:11:48.11\00:11:51.54
But I was scheduled to take
00:11:51.57\00:11:53.84
these people to
lunch at their house.
00:11:53.87\00:11:55.51
So I came to the
door, I knocked on the door
00:11:55.54\00:11:59.63
and the wife came to the door
00:11:59.66\00:12:01.03
and she said to me
as I was standing there
00:12:01.06\00:12:05.24
with these kind of--
these two officials behind me.
00:12:05.27\00:12:07.07
She said, "Well, I
have food for them,
00:12:07.10\00:12:09.58
but I don't have
anything for you."
00:12:09.61\00:12:11.15
Hmm. Awful feeling.
00:12:11.18\00:12:14.02
It was a very awkward moment.
00:12:14.05\00:12:16.32
Yeah, it did hurt pretty bad
00:12:16.35\00:12:19.59
and the two officials
didn't quite hear that
00:12:19.62\00:12:20.99
and they walked in the door
00:12:21.02\00:12:22.39
and one of them
turned to me and said,
00:12:22.42\00:12:23.79
"Well, Tom, where
are you going to eat?"
00:12:23.82\00:12:25.32
And I said, "I don't know."
00:12:25.35\00:12:27.70
And there was another
little awkward moment there.
00:12:27.73\00:12:29.25
The door closed and
I was without lunch.
00:12:29.28\00:12:33.29
I drove away and
found some lunch,
00:12:33.32\00:12:36.14
some place and, you know,
00:12:36.17\00:12:38.69
that was kind of
a tough experience,
00:12:38.72\00:12:40.67
so one or two of those officials
00:12:40.70\00:12:42.68
talked with me
later about this anyways.
00:12:42.71\00:12:45.22
But the time
passed and, eventually,
00:12:45.25\00:12:51.42
I still remember this,
this family came to the town
00:12:51.45\00:12:56.82
where I lived and it was
Sabbath and we were at church.
00:12:56.85\00:13:00.94
And after church here
they were sitting in their car.
00:13:00.97\00:13:05.30
And I said to my wife,
00:13:05.33\00:13:07.03
"We should invite
them over for lunch."
00:13:07.06\00:13:09.46
She said, "Sure,
go ahead invite them."
00:13:09.49\00:13:11.45
So I went over to the car.
00:13:11.48\00:13:13.37
The window was rolled
down on the wife's side
00:13:13.40\00:13:17.01
and I kind of
leaned at the window
00:13:17.04\00:13:18.41
and I said, "You guys
have a place to eat lunch?
00:13:18.44\00:13:21.65
Why don't you come and
eat lunch at our house?"
00:13:21.68\00:13:23.26
Well, they declined.
00:13:26.32\00:13:28.96
But we are friends to this day.
00:13:28.99\00:13:32.09
I bet they were very
shocked to hear that invitation.
00:13:32.12\00:13:34.81
They probably
expected you to turn away,
00:13:34.84\00:13:37.98
walk away-- I don't know.
00:13:38.01\00:13:39.38
Or to say some-- anything.
00:13:39.41\00:13:42.87
You know, I'm not
some righteous dude here
00:13:42.90\00:13:45.30
because I had something wrong
00:13:45.33\00:13:47.34
that had offended
them in the first place
00:13:47.37\00:13:49.71
and they had responded.
00:13:49.74\00:13:52.09
But the Lord
helped to heal a wound
00:13:52.12\00:13:56.84
when--as it says here,
"Don't repay evil for evil."
00:13:56.87\00:14:00.76
Don't keep the cycle going.
00:14:00.79\00:14:03.58
You know, if you've made
a mistake apologize for it
00:14:03.61\00:14:07.01
and if you have the opportunity
00:14:07.04\00:14:11.81
to break the cycle of violence,
00:14:11.84\00:14:13.44
that's what he's
talking about here.
00:14:13.47\00:14:15.30
Break the cycle and
start people on the right path.
00:14:15.33\00:14:20.69
The way to get along with
a rascal is to surprise him
00:14:20.72\00:14:23.83
with grace to do something
that will really get to you.
00:14:23.86\00:14:29.23
You know, Paul says that
00:14:29.26\00:14:30.63
"You're going to heap
coals of fire on his head."
00:14:30.66\00:14:33.84
Now some people say,
"Uh-ha, that's my revenge.
00:14:33.87\00:14:36.92
I'll be nice to him and
he'll get my revenge too."
00:14:36.95\00:14:40.01
Be kind to him.
00:14:40.04\00:14:41.41
No, no, no, no, no, no,
the coals of fire are from God.
00:14:41.44\00:14:44.84
These are conscience now
speaking to them and saying,
00:14:44.87\00:14:49.21
"You know, you shouldn't
have done what you did.
00:14:49.24\00:14:51.99
You should go
and make that right.
00:14:52.02\00:14:54.16
You should be
friends with them."
00:14:54.19\00:14:56.60
It really breaks
through the barriers of hatred.
00:14:56.63\00:15:02.32
When you react with kindness,
00:15:02.35\00:15:05.66
when people expect you
to be mean and unsettling
00:15:05.69\00:15:10.37
and that just has a wonderful
way of changing relationships.
00:15:10.40\00:15:16.20
And it's similar to the
wise words of King Solomon.
00:15:16.23\00:15:18.65
He said, "A soft
answer turns away wrath."
00:15:18.68\00:15:22.78
Doesn't it? Indeed.
00:15:22.81\00:15:24.18
Well, this is
very interesting study.
00:15:24.21\00:15:26.00
I think there've
been times in my life
00:15:26.03\00:15:28.61
where some people
have not been nice to me.
00:15:28.64\00:15:30.64
And unfortunately, I
have not been nice to others,
00:15:30.67\00:15:34.84
but I'm thankful
that there can be
00:15:34.87\00:15:37.61
some encouraging
words in the scriptures.
00:15:37.64\00:15:40.04
Stay with us
friends as we return to
00:15:40.07\00:15:42.46
"Books of the Book."
00:15:42.49\00:15:43.86