Every year in America
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there are over
one million deaths
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because of Type 2
diabetes and chronic obesity.
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This includes heart
attacks and strokes.
00:00:18.35\00:00:20.75
That's six and half
747s crashing every day.
00:00:20.78\00:00:24.19
What's even more surprising
is that the fix is easy.
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It's your lifestyle.
00:00:27.66\00:00:29.22
Wouldn't it be nice if you could
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actually add
quality years to your life
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rather than dying
one organ at a time?
00:00:32.49\00:00:35.36
Obesity and
diabetes are the cause
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of over million deaths per year.
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Most diseases are reversible
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because most diseases
are lifestyle diseases,
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especially Type 2
diabetes and chronic obesity.
00:00:44.61\00:00:48.04
Seriously now,
they can be reversed
00:00:48.08\00:00:50.25
and the quality of
your life can be renewed.
00:00:50.28\00:00:53.88
Call Newstart
today at 1-800-525-9192.
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You will see dramatic changes
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in the first few
days of our program
00:01:01.59\00:01:03.63
and you'll be on the road
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to a better more
robust quality of life.
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The Newstart programs
are simple and effective.
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Hi, friends and welcome
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to another
edition of Newstart Now.
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I'm your host, Ron Giannoni.
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In our studio with
me we have a gentleman,
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by the name of, David Unnewehr
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and I'd like you to
take a look at the clip,
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when he first arrived.
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I decided to come to Weimar
after much anxiety and anxious
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thinking about whether
this is the right place for me
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because I had lost my wife,
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a year ago after a long illness,
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in her last year
I took care of her,
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so I'm the full time caretaker,
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left my job and
I just found that,
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you know, I was gaining weight.
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And you know, some other
habits were not the best.
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And, and so, I
was spinning my wheels
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for a couple months there
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and not, still not
ready to go back to work.
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And, I just said well, you
know, at some point I said,
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"How am I going to get
out of this situation?"
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And, and you know, how,
how am I going to proceed
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you know, get more
direction, treat myself better.
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Have better health habits,
get back to the exercise,
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which I've always been
very good about but it lacks.
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You know, recently I'd
like to lose 50 pounds.
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And, I know, I
can't lose all that here.
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But, hopefully I'll have
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you know, I'll
learn some better habits
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and, you know, just
living a healthier lifestyle
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and I'd always
been good on exercise
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but I want to, you know,
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I want to get
back in that discipline
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and that seems to be
something you can do here
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and hopefully that
I'll take that back.
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Hi, friends and
welcome back in our studio.
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David, how are you sir?
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I'm doing better.
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Yes, I can see that
from when we first spoke
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which is about two,
little over two weeks ago?
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Over two weeks ago, right.
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You know, the
viewers have just watched
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your interview
when you first got here.
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And to many people it's obvious,
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why you came here.
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And, others don't
know, why you came here?
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So, I want to
talk about specifics.
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We know, and you
have said already that,
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your wife had passed away.
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And all of a sudden your
life does kind of unraveled.
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And you were fighting issues
of one of which was depression.
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And all of a sudden,
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because you were
living this lifestyle,
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you started gaining
weight, becoming more depressed,
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you didn't work
for quite some time.
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Has any of this change?
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Number one specifically,
do you have hope now
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that you can re-enter the world
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and get back to
your old lifestyle
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as a rugged exercise enthusiast.
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Bike rider that
rode from Chicago
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to the East Coast,
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how's, how's,
what's gonna happen?
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Well, Ron, I'm,
I'm very hopeful that
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I always knew that I could get
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the physical fitness
back and lose some weight.
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And that certainly
happened here at Weimar,
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I lost ten and a
half pounds already.
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Blood pressure
went from borderline
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to slightly below borderline
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to very, very safe zone, so
I'm feeling good about that.
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What was it, let me ask.
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I think, I
think when I got here,
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it was probably 135 over 88,
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and now I'm consistently
getting 120 over and over 80
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or I had one
that was 110 over 68.
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All right.
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So, I've never had one that low.
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You know, when I
was in my 20s and 30s
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so, I was very happy about that.
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Why do you think that happened?
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Well, I think
it's the, the low fat,
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high plant based
diet, not eating junk food.
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When you know, I
did cook for my wife
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when she was ailing
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and I learned to
cook a little bit.
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But, once she was gone.
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You know, I did, I just
didn't have that incentive
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to really take care of myself.
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And so, I eat
out when I did eat.
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Sometimes I skip meals,
sometimes I had beverages
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that probably
weren't the best for me.
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And, I just didn't...
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I ate it what I would
call a very haphazard diet.
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Sometimes it was good, you know,
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because I have
those basic instincts
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I've always known that,
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you know, you should
eat a lot of vegetables.
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I have gardens,
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but I kind of let my
gardens go a little bit.
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I know, you
should eat a lot of fruit
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but, you know, I
was very inconsistent
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and not really caring that much.
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Yeah. So, all the...
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Being introduced to
vegan and vegetarian food that,
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that really tastes good
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and actually getting some
cooking classes to see how,
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I might try to
prepare these myself
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and fortunately I have
some sons that love to cook.
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So, I'm hoping
they will help me with.
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In fact one of
my sons is a chef.
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Really?
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A pretty good chief, he
was a chief in open California,
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and now he's just moved back
to Washington D.C. where I am.
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And, I'm hoping that he'll get,
maybe enthused about this too
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and kind of help
me along with that.
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Well, I'm sure he
knows a lot more than,
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we even know,
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because they learn
this in school themselves.
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They do, yeah.
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So, you know, I do see
a change of attitude here.
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Right.
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And, I see that
you're a lot more open.
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You're ready to hit the road,
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and just, you
know, go for the gusto.
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How are you going to...?
How's that going to manifest?
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What do you, what
are you going to do
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when you get back home?
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Well, I think,
you know, I was after,
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you know, I think for the
first six months to a year
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after you lose a spouse,
you're kind of in a cocoon,
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you're feeling,
okay, and you're grieving
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but I think the
panic sort of hits
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when all of sudden
you realize she's gone.
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I left my job, I left work
to take care of her for a year,
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which was a good thing to do.
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But now, you know,
when I started thinking
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back six months ago
about getting a resume,
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my resume back together.
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Calling up all my old contacts
that I had just basic clean up,
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getting organized again
just seemed overwhelming,
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it seems less overwhelming now.
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I don't think
it's completely gone.
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Right.
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I mean I think
physically I'm back
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and I know what to do on that
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but, I got to work on
the mental aspect too.
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Well sure, but you
look like a strapping guy,
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you look strong and
healthy, you've got good stature
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and you're still a young man.
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Thank you, thank you. Yes.
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I can say that.
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At 63, that's a
good, good thing to...
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Good to hear it. Yeah.
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Sometimes, when you're
down, you don't feel like that.
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Well, of course. Yeah.
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Of course. Yeah.
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I can remember,
when I was in my 20's
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that I was feeling life,
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life was going
to end any minute.
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Wow.
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So, you know, I see
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and, you know,
we're going to help you.
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When...
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And I think this is
a good segue into that.
00:08:59.07\00:09:02.30
When you leave here,
00:09:02.34\00:09:03.71
you're going to
get an e-mail from me.
00:09:03.74\00:09:05.61
Oh, okay.
00:09:05.64\00:09:06.98
And the e-mail is
going to say something like,
00:09:07.01\00:09:09.71
we know that being accountable
is very helpful for you.
00:09:09.74\00:09:16.58
Right. And, if you choose to.
00:09:16.62\00:09:19.82
I will make a monthly
call to you and we will talk.
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I will encourage and
inspire light of fire.
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Whatever you care for me
to do, I'll be there to do it.
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So, I'm looking forward
to work with you on that.
00:09:31.73\00:09:34.90
Well, that's great, you
know, I mean accountability
00:09:34.94\00:09:37.67
is one thing that
I found here, we...
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Our group was special here we,
00:09:40.41\00:09:43.14
we have kind of a natural
leader Jack from Rhode Island
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who organized a 5
to 6 am walking group.
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Yes.
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And they have told us that
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there has never been a
pre-breakfast walking crew.
00:09:54.22\00:09:57.63
No, there
hasn't, not that I know.
00:09:57.66\00:09:59.59
And we started out,
well, we consistently done
00:09:59.63\00:10:02.90
about three miles
before dawn every morning.
00:10:02.93\00:10:05.57
And, since the time is changing,
00:10:05.60\00:10:07.27
it's getting later every day,
we started out with some light.
00:10:07.30\00:10:10.97
And then it would,
the sun would rise.
00:10:11.01\00:10:12.41
Now, we're
starting out with no light
00:10:12.44\00:10:14.94
and we're
walking with flashlights.
00:10:14.98\00:10:17.08
But there's a lot of
accountability in that group
00:10:17.11\00:10:19.78
and, you know, I'd
love to take all those folks
00:10:19.81\00:10:22.35
that walk with me home.
00:10:22.38\00:10:23.95
Yeah.
00:10:23.99\00:10:25.32
But there are,
some of are in L.A.
00:10:25.35\00:10:26.76
some of them
are in Rhode Island,
00:10:26.79\00:10:28.82
I'm in Maryland so, I
don't know how I can do that
00:10:28.86\00:10:34.03
but maybe we
can do a skype walk.
00:10:34.06\00:10:36.60
Call in the morning
but, if you call me,
00:10:36.63\00:10:38.20
that's going to help too.
00:10:38.23\00:10:39.57
You bet, you bet.
00:10:39.60\00:10:40.94
And, you know,
there is a special thing
00:10:40.97\00:10:43.20
that happens with our guests
00:10:43.24\00:10:45.47
when they come
through the program.
00:10:45.51\00:10:47.28
And I know this
because I was one of you.
00:10:47.31\00:10:49.91
As I have already testified.
00:10:49.94\00:10:52.81
And we get very close,
00:10:52.85\00:10:55.28
there's a
bonding that takes place.
00:10:55.32\00:10:57.72
When, people come together
for a common cause to get well.
00:10:57.75\00:11:02.12
Miracles happen. Right.
00:11:02.16\00:11:04.23
And I know you've seen several
00:11:04.26\00:11:06.33
right here in the
last couple of weeks.
00:11:06.36\00:11:08.06
That's right.
00:11:08.10\00:11:09.70
Nonetheless, please do keep
in contact with these folks.
00:11:09.73\00:11:15.10
Yeah. They'll help you.
00:11:15.14\00:11:16.67
Yeah.
00:11:16.71\00:11:18.04
It's amazing, sometimes I wonder
00:11:18.07\00:11:20.28
who the doctors are, the guests
00:11:20.31\00:11:22.91
who are helping one another
00:11:22.94\00:11:25.61
or the doctors
and, you know, I mean
00:11:25.65\00:11:28.65
it's just like we,
we help one another.
00:11:28.68\00:11:30.82
Right. Who is your doctor?
00:11:30.85\00:11:32.19
Isn't doctor Ing?
00:11:32.22\00:11:33.56
It's Dr. Ing. Yes.
00:11:33.59\00:11:34.92
And I really got
along well with him.
00:11:34.96\00:11:36.99
He's a really caring man.
00:11:37.03\00:11:39.43
Isn't he a special guy.
00:11:39.46\00:11:41.03
Have you ever had a
doctor, spend an hour with you.
00:11:41.06\00:11:45.00
No, I never have
and the thing that
00:11:45.03\00:11:47.90
really amazed me
was after, after second
00:11:47.94\00:11:53.21
and every appointment since,
00:11:53.24\00:11:55.28
we have about 15 or
20 minutes together.
00:11:55.31\00:11:57.78
And, then he says,
"Let's go for a walk."
00:11:57.81\00:11:59.41
Yeah.
00:11:59.45\00:12:00.78
Now, has anybody
ever had a doctor
00:12:00.82\00:12:02.25
that says, "Let's go for a walk"
00:12:02.28\00:12:03.62
and he, he walks
with each of his patients.
00:12:03.65\00:12:06.82
That's right. Yeah.
00:12:06.86\00:12:08.22
I remember that. Yeah.
00:12:08.26\00:12:09.72
And by the way, they
also take you to the house
00:12:09.76\00:12:12.99
and fix you a nice meal
that first Friday night.
00:12:13.03\00:12:15.40
Oh, yeah. I bet
you enjoyed that?
00:12:15.43\00:12:17.23
Oh, yeah. Dr. Lukens did that.
00:12:17.27\00:12:19.53
Right, well
actually it was Dr. Ing.
00:12:19.57\00:12:21.60
Oh, was Dr. Ing? Dr. Ing.
00:12:21.64\00:12:22.97
Oh, okay. And, and his wife Mae.
00:12:23.00\00:12:25.04
All right.
00:12:25.07\00:12:26.41
And she had a special treat,
00:12:26.44\00:12:29.98
some kind of cookie, you
know, ball type shape that,
00:12:30.01\00:12:34.12
reminded me of the cookie,
00:12:34.15\00:12:36.92
the powdered sugar
cookies my mom used to make,
00:12:36.95\00:12:41.79
except they didn't have the,
00:12:41.82\00:12:43.16
the sugar or anything like that.
00:12:43.19\00:12:44.53
With the rum
inside or without the rum?
00:12:44.56\00:12:45.89
Oh, no rum, no
rum, I don't think.
00:12:45.93\00:12:47.36
The rum balls. Yeah, yeah.
00:12:47.40\00:12:49.80
We ran out of time. Okay.
00:12:49.83\00:12:51.63
I want to thank
you and God bless you.
00:12:51.67\00:12:54.40
We'll be talking. Yeah. Okay.
00:12:54.44\00:12:57.37
Now, friends, don't go away,
00:12:57.41\00:12:59.11
because Dr. Ing is
going to be right with us,
00:12:59.14\00:13:02.44
after this very
important message.
00:13:02.48\00:13:05.81
Welcome to Ask the
Doctor. I'm Dr. David DeRose.
00:13:11.39\00:13:15.46
We're taking your questions
00:13:15.49\00:13:16.99
and we're going today
to Lisa, in West Virginia.
00:13:17.03\00:13:20.83
Here's Lisa's
question, "Here in America,
00:13:20.86\00:13:23.77
what would you
recommend as the best diet
00:13:23.80\00:13:27.90
for the general
population to follow and why?"
00:13:27.94\00:13:31.37
Well, I wish I could tell
you there was one best diet
00:13:31.41\00:13:33.84
for every single person.
00:13:33.88\00:13:35.34
But, the amazing thing
is we're all different.
00:13:35.38\00:13:38.08
But there is one
general dietary strategy
00:13:38.11\00:13:40.88
that nutritionist
after nutritionist
00:13:40.92\00:13:43.15
is pointing us to,
it's a voice, it's a chorus,
00:13:43.18\00:13:46.32
it's been growing in volume
over the last decade or two.
00:13:46.35\00:13:50.99
They're telling us listen,
00:13:51.03\00:13:52.39
"Move more toward
a vegetarian diet."
00:13:52.43\00:13:55.30
Eat more of those plant
foods, more whole fruits,
00:13:55.33\00:13:58.60
whole grains,
vegetables, nuts, seeds.
00:13:58.63\00:14:02.07
Some of you, as you listen
to this message, you'd say,
00:14:02.10\00:14:03.81
"But I've been
hearing this message so much,
00:14:03.84\00:14:05.84
I wanted to hear something
different on this show."
00:14:05.87\00:14:09.34
Actually, it's hard
to change the truth.
00:14:09.38\00:14:11.88
And so, many Americans
are getting the message,
00:14:11.91\00:14:14.32
they're getting away
from their heavy abundance
00:14:14.35\00:14:16.85
of meat, milk, eggs and cheese
00:14:16.89\00:14:18.79
and they're going
to more plant products.
00:14:18.82\00:14:20.29
Some of you'll
say, "Well, Dr. DeRose,
00:14:20.32\00:14:21.66
that's why I am
essentially a vegetarian.
00:14:21.69\00:14:23.76
I'm only eating animal
products once a week or less."
00:14:23.79\00:14:27.26
Well, that's great,
00:14:27.30\00:14:28.63
but you want to
know something amazing,
00:14:28.66\00:14:30.00
some of the latest data
from one of the most impressive
00:14:30.03\00:14:33.64
medical research
studies have some 90,000 people
00:14:33.67\00:14:37.64
and what's being called
the Adventist Health Study too.
00:14:37.67\00:14:40.11
Some of you know
Seventh-day Adventists,
00:14:40.14\00:14:42.21
among the
healthiest people in the world.
00:14:42.24\00:14:44.48
The federal
government of the United Sates
00:14:44.51\00:14:46.21
has spent million of
dollars, trying to study
00:14:46.25\00:14:48.28
why Seventh-day
Adventists are so healthy.
00:14:48.32\00:14:51.12
Because they're not interested
00:14:51.15\00:14:52.75
in making the
general populist Adventists,
00:14:52.79\00:14:55.92
but they want
to get the benefits
00:14:55.96\00:14:57.93
from this people
group and extend them
00:14:57.96\00:14:59.59
to the whole population.
00:14:59.63\00:15:01.33
What is some of
the most recent data
00:15:01.36\00:15:03.00
from the Adventist
Health Study showing?
00:15:03.03\00:15:04.80
They're actually showing,
00:15:04.83\00:15:06.40
that if you're
a semi-vegetarian,
00:15:06.43\00:15:08.00
if you're only having
occasional serving of meat,
00:15:08.04\00:15:11.01
milk, eggs or cheese,
00:15:11.04\00:15:12.54
your health is
significantly worse.
00:15:12.57\00:15:15.51
When it comes to a
risk of developing things
00:15:15.54\00:15:17.45
like diabetes and
high blood pressure
00:15:17.48\00:15:20.88
than a total
vegetarian or vegan.
00:15:20.92\00:15:23.72
The message is simply this.
00:15:23.75\00:15:25.39
For most people
getting all the animal products
00:15:25.42\00:15:28.32
out of their diet
is the most powerful
00:15:28.36\00:15:31.19
health giving
diet on the planet.
00:15:31.23\00:15:34.23
And if you move
in that direction,
00:15:34.26\00:15:36.13
you will likely see
significant health benefits.
00:15:36.16\00:15:39.27
I'm Dr. David DeRose,
thank you for joining us
00:15:39.30\00:15:42.20
on today's
editions of Ask the doctor.
00:15:42.24\00:15:44.54
You can be a part of the dialog.
00:15:44.57\00:15:46.11
Simple send us your questions,
ask@lifeandhealth.org.
00:15:46.14\00:15:52.81
Welcome, back friends.
00:15:56.48\00:15:57.82
And as I
promised Dr. Clarence Ing.
00:15:57.85\00:16:00.09
It's great to be here, Ron.
00:16:00.12\00:16:01.46
Good to see you Doc. And it's...
00:16:01.49\00:16:03.89
I can hardly wait
to talk about Dave,
00:16:03.93\00:16:06.80
such a precious soul,
00:16:06.83\00:16:10.57
let me just ask
you, just in general,
00:16:10.60\00:16:12.50
how did he do
during the program?
00:16:12.53\00:16:13.94
Well, I was here in the program,
00:16:13.97\00:16:15.44
you learn the
importance of good healthy diet.
00:16:15.47\00:16:18.81
The advantages of
a plant based diet.
00:16:18.84\00:16:21.24
He was fortunate be in,
00:16:21.28\00:16:23.38
before he came his
cholesterol levels were good,
00:16:23.41\00:16:26.01
you know, he, he
doesn't have high blood pressure
00:16:26.05\00:16:28.95
heart disease,
so that's marvelous.
00:16:28.98\00:16:31.15
And so we learned
some important things
00:16:31.19\00:16:33.25
and the importance of activity.
00:16:33.29\00:16:35.32
And so he chose to
continue to do these things
00:16:35.36\00:16:40.50
and I think that's important.
00:16:40.53\00:16:42.30
One of the things I noticed
00:16:42.33\00:16:44.73
and I noticed because I remember
00:16:44.77\00:16:46.90
when I came through the program,
00:16:46.94\00:16:48.94
I saw that I was at a place
where people cared about me
00:16:48.97\00:16:54.68
and I felt that
way about my doctor,
00:16:54.71\00:16:57.11
I felt that way about
you, you were here then.
00:16:57.15\00:17:00.45
Dr. Lukens was
here, and Michael was my
00:17:00.48\00:17:03.82
personal physician at the
time and I just felt like,
00:17:03.85\00:17:07.82
this is the place I need to
be, these people really care.
00:17:07.86\00:17:12.39
Does in fact attitude have
something to do with healing?
00:17:12.43\00:17:18.53
Oh, attitude in what
you think about have a,
00:17:18.57\00:17:21.17
I think it really
have tremendous impact
00:17:21.20\00:17:23.97
on our health, you
know, there is a familiar text
00:17:24.01\00:17:27.38
with many of our listeners
here are familiar with,
00:17:27.41\00:17:30.18
it says, "A merry heart
doeth good like a medicine:
00:17:30.21\00:17:33.35
but a broken
spirit drieth the bones."
00:17:33.38\00:17:35.98
Well, I like the good
news paraphrase of that
00:17:36.02\00:17:39.52
and says, "Be happy, be healthy,
00:17:39.55\00:17:41.49
why do you want to be
gloomy and sick all the time."
00:17:41.52\00:17:45.53
And, you know, broken
spirit drieth the bones,
00:17:45.56\00:17:49.03
your immune systems,
your red blood cells,
00:17:49.06\00:17:51.37
I mean your white blood cells
are made in the bone marrow.
00:17:51.40\00:17:54.40
And it's pretty common knowledge
00:17:54.44\00:17:57.47
that when people
are depressed and down,
00:17:57.51\00:18:00.91
they have more health problems
and they don't do as well.
00:18:00.94\00:18:04.38
So, that's the
other side of the coin.
00:18:04.41\00:18:06.82
You have a choice of being,
00:18:06.85\00:18:10.25
can we really
choose our attitudes.
00:18:10.29\00:18:13.62
How can we change,
when we're feeling down,
00:18:13.66\00:18:16.83
maybe I'll use a word,
this is, maybe to heavy.
00:18:16.86\00:18:20.40
Maybe we'll feel
little depressed or anxious,
00:18:20.43\00:18:23.50
how do we change that?
00:18:23.53\00:18:24.87
Well, I think
what's really important is,
00:18:24.90\00:18:26.57
what you choose to think about
and that's important choice.
00:18:26.60\00:18:31.97
Choice is just really important.
00:18:32.01\00:18:35.21
Now, we
understand we can't control
00:18:35.24\00:18:37.48
all the thoughts that
go, come into our mind.
00:18:37.51\00:18:40.28
But out of the ones
that come into our mind,
00:18:40.32\00:18:42.62
we are the ones who choose,
00:18:42.65\00:18:45.32
select which one's
we're going to think about.
00:18:45.35\00:18:48.82
And I think
there we need to think
00:18:48.86\00:18:50.49
upon the positive things.
00:18:50.53\00:18:52.36
I mean, you know,
you read in the Bible,
00:18:52.39\00:18:56.10
you can think, you develop
on the positive, the good,
00:18:56.13\00:18:58.53
it doesn't tell
us to think about
00:18:58.57\00:18:59.90
all the bad things
that have happened to us.
00:18:59.93\00:19:01.94
All the people who have hurt us
00:19:01.97\00:19:03.41
or taken advantage of
us, dwell on the positive.
00:19:03.44\00:19:06.88
And that's what the
Apostle Paul writes for us.
00:19:06.91\00:19:09.24
So, I think the same thing,
00:19:09.28\00:19:11.51
it's true that I may have some
negative thoughts in my mind,
00:19:11.55\00:19:14.38
but I don't have
to think about those.
00:19:14.42\00:19:16.99
And, you know,
00:19:17.02\00:19:19.39
I thought about things
that might possibly happen.
00:19:19.42\00:19:23.43
And I give an illustration
sometimes in the class,
00:19:23.46\00:19:26.56
you know, I get
up in the morning
00:19:26.59\00:19:28.06
and I've got to take a
shower and get to work.
00:19:28.10\00:19:30.93
But as I step in the
shower I think oh, you know,
00:19:30.97\00:19:34.47
if I'm not careful, I
could slip and break my leg.
00:19:34.50\00:19:37.47
And then I couldn't get to work.
00:19:37.51\00:19:39.37
So, then I go back to
bed and I lie down in bed,
00:19:39.41\00:19:42.31
I pull up the covers
and I'm very comfortable.
00:19:42.34\00:19:44.71
Then I start to think,
00:19:44.75\00:19:46.08
you know, more people die
in bed than any other place.
00:19:46.11\00:19:48.65
Beds are really
pretty dangerous,
00:19:48.68\00:19:50.55
I better get out of here.
00:19:50.59\00:19:51.92
You better get out of the bed.
00:19:51.95\00:19:53.29
Yeah, and so, then I say,
00:19:53.32\00:19:55.26
"Well, I guess I could go get
in my car and drive to work."
00:19:55.29\00:19:59.69
And I said, you
know, "35,000 plus thousand
00:19:59.73\00:20:04.30
people die in motor
vehicle accidents each year."
00:20:04.33\00:20:07.24
You know, I could get
killed on my way to work.
00:20:07.27\00:20:10.41
And so, says, you
know, "This is a bus,
00:20:10.44\00:20:12.87
I got to start
thinking more positively so--
00:20:12.91\00:20:16.28
That's a great illustration
how we can really ruin our day.
00:20:16.31\00:20:21.75
But, you know, there are those
00:20:21.78\00:20:24.32
who perhaps
would need to come here
00:20:24.35\00:20:27.82
for Dr. Nedley's
depression recovery program.
00:20:27.86\00:20:30.93
Right.
00:20:30.96\00:20:32.29
Which we do have
available so, friends,
00:20:32.33\00:20:34.60
you could call us about
the depression recovery.
00:20:34.63\00:20:37.93
They happen every
couple of months or so.
00:20:37.97\00:20:40.64
But, doctor, I want to just
take a moment and thank you.
00:20:40.67\00:20:44.47
I know you're busy guy.
00:20:44.51\00:20:46.54
And, you've taken your time here
00:20:46.57\00:20:48.18
to talk with us about Dave.
00:20:48.21\00:20:50.88
So, thank you very much,
00:20:50.91\00:20:53.75
looking forward to working
with you more in the future.
00:20:53.78\00:20:56.89
And be careful what
you choose to think about.
00:20:56.92\00:20:59.52
Amen.
00:20:59.55\00:21:00.89
And, friends, you be careful
what you choose to think about,
00:21:00.92\00:21:04.66
but, don't go away
we have a tip for you.
00:21:04.69\00:21:06.49
My name is
Jennifer Jill Schwirzer.
00:21:14.37\00:21:16.34
I am a licensed counselor,
professional counselor.
00:21:16.37\00:21:20.34
Licensed in the
State of Pennsylvania
00:21:20.38\00:21:22.31
and nationally certified.
00:21:22.34\00:21:23.81
Some people call,
people like me psychotherapist.
00:21:23.85\00:21:27.62
Day in and day out
people come into my office
00:21:27.65\00:21:29.75
and we work
through their problems
00:21:29.78\00:21:31.12
and I see certain patterns
that tend to repeat themselves.
00:21:31.15\00:21:34.42
And I decided to
boil down those patterns
00:21:34.46\00:21:37.43
into a presentation that I call
00:21:37.46\00:21:39.19
the Seven Deadly
Psychological Sins.
00:21:39.23\00:21:42.96
Let me share a little bit about
00:21:43.00\00:21:44.33
what I mean about
deadly psychological sins.
00:21:44.37\00:21:46.43
These aren't moral sins per se.
00:21:46.47\00:21:48.77
But there are things that
we do that sabotage ourselves,
00:21:48.80\00:21:53.34
hurt other people or
sabotage our relationships.
00:21:53.38\00:21:56.01
In other words, there are
ways in which we dysfunction.
00:21:56.04\00:21:58.81
We might say it that way.
00:21:58.85\00:22:00.68
The format of my
videos here is that,
00:22:00.72\00:22:03.22
I'm going to start out with
the deadly psychological sin,
00:22:03.25\00:22:05.75
I'm going to develop it,
I'm going to help explain
00:22:05.79\00:22:07.72
what I'm talking about.
00:22:07.76\00:22:09.09
And then I'm
gonna share with you
00:22:09.12\00:22:10.46
a Replacement Behavior,
00:22:10.49\00:22:12.69
because it's futile to
just point out our problems.
00:22:12.73\00:22:16.03
We need to come
up with a replacement
00:22:16.06\00:22:17.50
for those problems.
00:22:17.53\00:22:18.87
We have an expression
00:22:18.90\00:22:20.24
in behavioral
psychology which says,
00:22:20.27\00:22:22.07
"That negative
reinforcement stops behavior
00:22:22.10\00:22:24.24
but positive reinforcement
encourages behavior."
00:22:24.27\00:22:27.84
So, if we don't
replace those negative patterns
00:22:27.88\00:22:30.55
with something positive,
00:22:30.58\00:22:32.18
then we're likely to
relapse just like Jesus said,
00:22:32.21\00:22:35.78
"If you get one demon out,
00:22:35.82\00:22:37.15
if you don't fill
that room with something,
00:22:37.19\00:22:38.85
seven more are
going to come in."
00:22:38.89\00:22:40.52
So, I'm gonna give you
the replacement behavior
00:22:40.56\00:22:42.79
that will help to substitute
for that dysfunctional pattern
00:22:42.82\00:22:46.33
in your life or in
the life of someone else.
00:22:46.36\00:22:48.46
And, I hope it's
real helpful to you,
00:22:48.50\00:22:49.83
I'm gonna do my best to share
00:22:49.86\00:22:51.20
something that's encouraging
00:22:51.23\00:22:52.57
and uplifting and useful to you.
00:22:52.60\00:22:55.97
First deadly psychological
sin is criticism, criticism,
00:23:01.78\00:23:06.48
I don't know if you've borne
00:23:06.51\00:23:07.85
the brunt of being
raised in a critical home.
00:23:07.88\00:23:10.85
But human beings are by nature
00:23:10.89\00:23:13.32
negatively focused
and problem focused.
00:23:13.36\00:23:17.36
In fact, research has shown
that 75% of the interactions
00:23:17.39\00:23:21.86
between teachers
in elementary school
00:23:21.90\00:23:23.63
and their students is negative.
00:23:23.67\00:23:26.67
Research has also shown
that in a child's life time
00:23:26.70\00:23:29.64
from birth to 18-years
old he hears the word "No."
00:23:29.67\00:23:32.87
from his parents, 148,000 times.
00:23:32.91\00:23:37.21
Bottom line of all this
is that positive interaction.
00:23:37.25\00:23:41.48
And particularly
affirmation versus criticism
00:23:41.52\00:23:44.09
is a learned skill,
00:23:44.12\00:23:45.45
it's something we have to do
proactively and intentionally
00:23:45.49\00:23:48.42
or we will revert back
to our critical patterns.
00:23:48.46\00:23:52.26
Story is told of a young man,
00:23:52.29\00:23:54.10
who was complaining
about of the hymns at church,
00:23:54.13\00:23:57.53
he said, "They
were very boring."
00:23:57.57\00:23:59.03
His father said,
"Well, if you're going
00:23:59.07\00:24:00.40
to complain about it
then write one of your own."
00:24:00.44\00:24:02.50
Boy went into his
bedroom, and he wrote to him,
00:24:02.54\00:24:06.44
"When I surveyed
the wondrous cross."
00:24:06.47\00:24:10.05
The young man was Isaac Watts
00:24:10.08\00:24:11.88
and he went on
to write over 350,
00:24:11.91\00:24:14.55
many of them famous hymns
including, "Joy to the world."
00:24:14.58\00:24:17.09
So, there's a
place for criticism.
00:24:17.12\00:24:19.09
Criticism serves a function.
00:24:19.12\00:24:21.19
We by nature as human beings
are, are capable of reason
00:24:21.22\00:24:24.99
and what we call
critical thinking.
00:24:25.03\00:24:27.10
All criticism is not bad.
00:24:27.13\00:24:28.93
But we need to sort
of capture this beast
00:24:28.96\00:24:31.27
and train it, so that
it benefits us and others.
00:24:31.30\00:24:35.24
Scientific research
has shown that people
00:24:35.27\00:24:38.21
that are raised in
critical environments
00:24:38.24\00:24:41.01
where there is much criticism
among the family of origin,
00:24:41.04\00:24:44.75
tend to have more
depression diagnoses
00:24:44.78\00:24:47.58
and more depressive symptoms.
00:24:47.62\00:24:49.52
In fact, a critical environment
at home has been associated
00:24:49.55\00:24:53.46
with a broad
spectrum of mental illnesses,
00:24:53.49\00:24:55.99
such as schizophrenia and
other psychotic disorders.
00:24:56.02\00:24:59.56
I have a quote here
from Abraham Lincoln,
00:24:59.59\00:25:01.76
"He has the right to criticize
who has the heart to help."
00:25:01.80\00:25:06.67
In order to find out,
00:25:06.70\00:25:08.04
if you have the
heart to help that person,
00:25:08.07\00:25:09.50
I recommend that you
ask yourself three questions
00:25:09.54\00:25:11.71
before criticizing them.
00:25:11.74\00:25:13.17
Number one, "Do I
love to criticize?
00:25:13.21\00:25:15.31
Or do I hate to criticize?'
00:25:15.34\00:25:16.68
If you love it,
00:25:16.71\00:25:18.05
I think you need to
give yourself pause there.
00:25:18.08\00:25:19.81
Number two, "Am
I doing it to help?
00:25:19.85\00:25:23.05
Is that my motive?"
00:25:23.08\00:25:25.39
Number three,
"Will I do it kindly
00:25:25.42\00:25:28.32
and will I do it to
that person's face?"
00:25:28.36\00:25:31.19
Be aware of cyber criticism.
00:25:31.23\00:25:34.86
Cyber criticism can easily turn
into a form of cyber bullying.
00:25:34.90\00:25:39.73
It's really best when you're
addressing sensitive topics
00:25:39.77\00:25:42.40
to talk to that person
eyeball to eyeball so to speak.
00:25:42.44\00:25:45.37
The replacement for criticism,
I'm sure you're dying to know,
00:25:45.41\00:25:48.61
very simple.
00:25:48.64\00:25:50.05
It's affirmation,
learn to affirm people.
00:25:50.08\00:25:53.28
This does not
come naturally to us.
00:25:53.31\00:25:55.52
I recommend that if
you're a critic holic,
00:25:55.55\00:25:57.65
we might call it.
00:25:57.69\00:25:59.02
That you go on a criticism fast,
00:25:59.05\00:26:00.72
for two to three weeks
where you criticize, nothing,
00:26:00.76\00:26:04.36
no one, not even
yourself for three weeks.
00:26:04.39\00:26:07.16
I challenge you to try that.
00:26:07.20\00:26:09.13
And then afterwards, you,
when you issue a criticism
00:26:09.16\00:26:12.93
always do it in what we call,
affirmation sandwich style.
00:26:12.97\00:26:16.84
You will affirm that person.
Then you issue the criticism.
00:26:16.87\00:26:20.18
And then you followed up
with another affirmation.
00:26:20.21\00:26:23.14
This helps to soften the blow.
00:26:23.18\00:26:25.11
Marriage
experts, John Gottman say,
00:26:25.15\00:26:27.18
"That in order to neutralize
00:26:27.22\00:26:29.38
the emotional
impact of a criticism,
00:26:29.42\00:26:31.99
one must affirm five times."
00:26:32.02\00:26:34.76
So remember that ratio five
affirmations to one criticism.
00:26:34.79\00:26:40.16
What is the
affect of an affirming
00:26:40.20\00:26:42.50
environment in the home?
00:26:42.53\00:26:43.87
We've talked about the affect
of a critical environment.
00:26:43.90\00:26:45.77
What's, what's the affect
of an affirming environment?
00:26:45.80\00:26:49.40
Some research has shown
00:26:49.44\00:26:51.91
that there is a
positive correlation
00:26:51.94\00:26:54.51
between fatherly affirmation
and high self-esteem in girls.
00:26:54.54\00:27:00.85
There's a negative correlation
00:27:00.88\00:27:02.68
between fatherly affirmation
and fear of intimacy.
00:27:02.72\00:27:07.26
So in other words, if
father's affirm their daughters,
00:27:07.29\00:27:10.53
they're likely to
feel good about themselves
00:27:10.56\00:27:12.63
and they're likely to be able
00:27:12.66\00:27:14.00
to develop
healthy relationships.
00:27:14.03\00:27:15.70
Sounds like a good thing
to do. Try starting today.
00:27:15.73\00:27:19.00
Affirming someone that
you would normally criticize.
00:27:19.03\00:27:21.57
And, usually I hate to say
00:27:21.60\00:27:22.94
if it's those
that are closest to us
00:27:22.97\00:27:24.34
that we tend to
be so critical of.
00:27:24.37\00:27:26.71
But try turning that around
and intentionally proactively
00:27:26.74\00:27:30.71
affirming that person,
they won't know what happened.
00:27:30.75\00:27:34.68
Well, friends
that's it for today
00:27:34.72\00:27:36.28
but join us next
week for another episode.
00:27:36.32\00:27:39.59
In the meantime,
pick up the phone
00:27:39.62\00:27:41.12
and give us a
call at 1-800-525-9192.
00:27:41.16\00:27:47.10
Mention the Newstart Now program
00:27:47.13\00:27:49.86
and receive The
Newstart Special.
00:27:49.90\00:27:52.93