¤¤ ¤¤
00:00:00.70\00:00:07.24
>> Let's bow our heads and pray.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank You
for such a wonderful day.
00:00:09.90\00:00:15.64
Thank You for the Sabbath. We
just ask that You be with us
during this hour of worship and
00:00:15.64\00:00:21.02
praise, as we learn more about
You. Thank You for all that
00:00:21.02\00:00:24.45
You've done for us.
In Jesus' name, amen.
00:00:24.45\00:00:26.86
>> Amen. >> Good morning!
00:00:26.89\00:00:29.32
It's almost afternoon, but
good morning and happy Sabbath.
00:00:29.32\00:00:34.96
Happy Sabbath!
Aren't you so glad that it's
00:00:34.96\00:00:38.43
Sabbath today? Yes,
it's just one of those
00:00:38.43\00:00:41.40
days that you know we just
get to set aside time to worship
00:00:41.40\00:00:44.61
God, to spend time
with family and friends.
00:00:44.61\00:00:47.34
But, you know, as we begin this
morning, I just invite you to
stand as we sing praises to God.
00:00:47.38\00:00:52.68
So, join us. ¤¤
00:00:52.68\00:00:54.92
>> Amen. You may be seated. ¤¤
00:03:45.02\00:03:50.43
¤¤ ¤¤
00:03:50.43\00:04:01.94
¤¤ ¤¤
00:06:21.44\00:06:30.02
¤¤
00:06:30.02\00:06:33.96
>> Amen. >> Amen. >>
So, for some of us, we've
00:09:45.78\00:09:49.02
just ended the first week of
school, and despite looking at
those deadlines or looking at
00:09:49.02\00:09:54.09
what is to come ahead, you know,
those feelings of stress and
feeling overwhelmed starts to
00:09:54.09\00:09:59.26
kick in a little bit. So, it
might not only just be classwork
but could be finances
00:09:59.26\00:10:04.63
that we're dealing with. It
could be family issues,
friendships, relationships, or
00:10:04.63\00:10:09.97
just work issues, also, that
cause us stress. But I just
invite you right now
00:10:09.97\00:10:15.78
at the beginning of the semester
to give those up to God.
Sometimes, it's kind of hard to
00:10:15.78\00:10:22.22
release those things up to Him,
but it's only through Christ,
only in Christ are we able to
00:10:22.22\00:10:27.56
find that hope, that strength to
go on, to go through those
trials that we'll face ahead of
00:10:27.56\00:10:32.93
us. So, before we sing, I just
invite you to stand again as we
00:10:32.93\00:10:37.73
sing the song, but if there's
anything pressing on your heart
that you'd like to bring
00:10:37.73\00:10:43.27
forward, I just invite you
to come, as we sing, before we
00:10:43.27\00:10:48.01
pray. So, join us as we sing.
00:10:48.01\00:10:49.94
¤¤ ¤¤
00:10:49.98\00:11:00.29
>> Good afternoon.
How are you guys doing?
00:15:10.14\00:15:13.14
Well, it is good to see you.
And you guys, you guys cleaned
00:15:13.14\00:15:19.58
up nicely.
00:15:19.58\00:15:20.72
You're looking sharp, sharp,
sharp. I am going to tell you a
00:15:20.75\00:15:24.79
story about a few years ago,
when I was a student missionary
in China, and I was living there
00:15:24.79\00:15:29.86
with my sister, and one day we
decided we were ready to eat
something different.
00:15:29.86\00:15:34.46
We had had enough Chinese food,
and they had just opened a Pizza
Hut on the other side of
00:15:34.46\00:15:39.53
town, and we were excited! But
we weren't the only ones excited
to go there because lots
00:15:39.53\00:15:44.21
of people apparently were ready
for something different. And so,
every day there was a
00:15:44.21\00:15:48.78
long, long line to get into
Pizza Hut. And so, I said to my
00:15:48.78\00:15:52.71
sister, "You go ahead. You get
in line. I'm going to run some
00:15:52.71\00:15:56.32
errands on the way, and I'll
meet you there." And as I was
00:15:56.32\00:16:00.99
crossing the very first
intersection on my bicycle, I
saw the scariest thing I had
00:16:00.99\00:16:09.33
ever seen in my entire life.
Because right there was
something so scary that my mouth
00:16:09.33\00:16:21.18
went dry. It was...
something so scary...
00:16:21.18\00:16:29.25
[ Laughter ] ...that I thought
my heart was going to stop,
00:16:29.25\00:16:37.09
because right there... was
something that made my life
flash before my eyes.
00:16:37.09\00:16:45.00
[ Laughter ] Oh, it was so
scary. Oh, and I know if I tell
00:16:45.00\00:16:52.97
you what it was, you'll say it's
not scary, but I promise you, it
00:16:52.97\00:16:56.11
was. I was there. Because
right there was a milk truck.
00:16:56.11\00:17:03.92
>> What?! >> Yes.
Now... [ Laughter ]
00:17:03.92\00:17:08.62
Now I know, I know. You probably
don't think milk trucks are
00:17:08.62\00:17:18.00
scary. And this is not an
advertisement for being a vegan,
but dairy can be scary.
00:17:18.00\00:17:24.07
But right there was a milk
truck, and it was still moving
00:17:24.07\00:17:31.45
in my direction. And then
everything went black. When I
woke up again, I was surrounded
00:17:31.45\00:17:36.99
by people. It doesn't take too
long in China for a crowd to
form, and they were all talking
00:17:36.99\00:17:43.09
Chinese at the same time.
And then everything went black
00:17:43.09\00:17:47.20
again. Now, I was actually
working at a hospital there in
China. I was teaching English,
00:17:47.20\00:17:54.54
and I had some fantastic
students, all kinds of doctors
and nurses, and then I had
00:17:54.54\00:18:02.08
another student. His name was
Gilbert. And Gilbert was not a
doctor. He was not a nurse.
00:18:02.08\00:18:08.75
He was not a medical tech. He
was not good at diagnosing
things or helping people with
00:18:08.75\00:18:15.06
stuff like that. He worked with
computers, and he was fantastic
00:18:15.06\00:18:19.79
in that area. But of all the
people I would have wanted to
help, Gilbert was not the one I
00:18:19.79\00:18:25.70
needed then. Oh, man, I would
have liked a neurosurgeon or an
orthopedic surgeon or a nurse or
00:18:25.70\00:18:32.37
especially an ER doctor. That
would have been awesome. But
when I came to again, who
00:18:32.37\00:18:39.31
was standing over me? Gilbert.
And he said all that he had
00:18:39.31\00:18:47.09
learned up to that point. He
said, "Teacher, how are you?"
And everything went black again.
00:18:47.09\00:18:58.23
Now, sometimes we think that
being a good friend means we
have to do this, this, and this.
00:18:58.23\00:19:04.17
But being a good friend means
you have to be there when people
need you, doesn't it?
00:19:04.17\00:19:10.18
And who has promised to always
be there when we need Him? Who
has promised that He will
00:19:10.18\00:19:17.55
never leave us or forsake
us? >> Jesus. >> Jesus! Yes!
00:19:17.55\00:19:20.56
And Jesus is the best friend,
and He is always going to be
00:19:20.56\00:19:24.49
there for us. And do you know
where I was the next time I woke
up? I was in the hospital.
00:19:24.49\00:19:30.97
Gilbert had carried me to the
hospital. He was a good friend.
00:19:30.97\00:19:37.64
And you guys, if you're going to
follow Jesus, one of the best
ways you can follow Jesus is
00:19:37.64\00:19:44.01
this week be a good friend. Be
there for people who need you.
00:19:44.01\00:19:48.55
Be there when people are sad. Be
there when people are hurt. Be
00:19:48.55\00:19:52.79
there. Be a good friend, like
Jesus. How many of you want to
thank Jesus for being a good
00:19:52.79\00:19:58.36
friend? And how many of you want
to say, "Jesus, this week I want
to follow You, and I want to be
00:19:58.36\00:20:03.33
a good friend to those around
me"? Who would like to pray and
00:20:03.33\00:20:10.61
thank Jesus? We've got one up
here. Not only did she select
herself, her neighbor voted for
00:20:10.61\00:20:15.51
her, too. So, that's a definite
win. And what is your name? >>
00:20:15.51\00:20:20.08
Ziana. >> Okay, will you thank
Jesus for being our best friend
and ask Him to help us be
00:20:20.08\00:20:26.29
friends to those around us?
Let's pray. >> Thank You, Jesus,
00:20:26.29\00:20:31.83
for helping us and thank You for
helping us do good grades at
class. And help us be with our
00:20:31.83\00:20:41.07
friends. Help us be brave.
And thank You, Jesus. Amen.
00:20:41.07\00:20:47.61
>> Amen. Thank you so much.
And as you go back to your seat,
00:20:47.61\00:20:52.41
remember, you can be a good
friend, just like Jesus is for
00:20:52.41\00:20:57.82
you. >> ¤ Hold ¤ H-o-o-o-o-ld
00:21:01.76\00:21:13.77
>> ¤ Hold >> ¤ Hold
00:21:16.74\00:21:18.47
>> ¤ On >> ¤ On
00:21:18.47\00:21:20.01
>> ¤ Hold >> ¤ Hold
00:21:20.01\00:21:21.61
>> ¤ On >> ¤ On
00:21:21.61\00:21:23.08
>> ¤ Hold >> ¤ Hold
00:21:23.08\00:21:24.51
>> ¤ On >> ¤ On
00:21:24.51\00:21:26.15
>> ¤ Hold >> ¤ Hold
00:21:26.15\00:21:27.45
>> ¤ On >> ¤ If you want to get
00:21:27.45\00:21:28.72
to Heaven, I'll tell you
how ¤ ¤ Just keep your hand
00:21:28.72\00:21:32.29
on the Gospel plow ¤
00:21:32.29\00:21:34.32
¤ Keep your hand on the
plow and hold on ¤ >> ¤ Hold
00:21:34.36\00:21:40.13
>> ¤ On >> ¤ If that
plow stays in your hand,
00:21:40.13\00:21:43.87
land you straight to the
Promised Land ¤ ¤ Keep your hand
00:21:43.87\00:21:50.34
on the plow and hold on
¤ >> ¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold on
00:21:50.34\00:21:55.44
>> ¤ Hold on, hold on
00:21:55.44\00:21:57.71
>> ¤ Hold on >>
¤ Hold on and keep
00:21:57.75\00:22:01.05
your hand on the
plow and hold on ¤
00:22:01.05\00:22:06.12
>> ¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold
on >> ¤ Hold on, hold on
00:22:06.15\00:22:11.59
>> ¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold on and
keep your hand on the plow and
00:22:11.59\00:22:20.54
hold on ¤ >> ¤ Hold on >> ¤
Mary wore three links of chain ¤
00:22:20.54\00:22:25.77
¤ Every link spelled my Jesus'
name ¤ ¤ Keep your hand on the
00:22:25.77\00:22:32.25
plow and hold on ¤ >> ¤
Hold on >> ¤ Keep on plowing
00:22:32.25\00:22:37.12
¤ Don't you tire ¤ Every
round goes higher and higher ¤
00:22:37.12\00:22:42.69
¤ Keep your hand on the
plow and hold on ¤ >> ¤ Hold on
00:22:42.69\00:22:49.56
>> ¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold
on, hold on >> ¤ Hold on
00:22:49.56\00:22:54.60
>> ¤ Hold on and keep your
hand on the plow and hold on ¤
00:22:54.60\00:23:02.18
>> ¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold
on >> ¤ Hold on, hold on
00:23:02.18\00:23:07.65
>> ¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold on and
keep your hand on the plow and
00:23:07.65\00:23:16.09
hold on ¤ ¤ Hold on, hold on >>
¤ I heard the voice of Jesus
say, "Come on to me,
00:23:16.09\00:23:28.27
I am the way" ¤ ¤ Keep your
hand on the plow and hold on ¤
00:23:28.27\00:23:35.18
>> ¤ Hold on, hold on ¤ Keep
on plowing and don't you tire ¤
00:23:35.18\00:23:41.05
¤ Every round goes higher and
higher ¤ ¤ Keep your hand on the
00:23:41.05\00:23:48.09
plow and hold on ¤ >>
¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold on
00:23:48.09\00:23:53.43
>> ¤ Hold on, hold on >> ¤ Hold
on and keep your hand on the
00:23:53.43\00:24:02.80
plow and hold on ¤ >>
¤ Hold on >> ¤ Hold on
00:24:02.80\00:24:07.98
>> ¤ Hold on, hold on >> ¤ Hold
on and keep your hand on the
00:24:07.98\00:24:21.22
plow and hold on ¤ >> ¤ Hold on
¤ Keep your hand on the plow of
00:24:21.22\00:24:25.76
the Gospel ¤ >> ¤ Hold on ¤ Keep
your hand on the plow of the
00:24:25.76\00:24:29.80
Gospel ¤ ¤ Keep your hand
on the Gospel plow ¤ ¤ Hold on
00:24:29.80\00:24:33.23
¤ Keep your hand on the plow of
the Gospel ¤ >> ¤ Keep your hand
00:24:33.23\00:24:38.54
on the plow of the Gospel ¤ >>
¤ Keep your hand on the plow of
00:24:38.54\00:24:43.71
the Gospel ¤ ¤ Keep your hand
on the Gospel plow ¤ ¤ Keep your
00:24:43.71\00:24:49.92
hand on the plow >> ¤ Keep your
hand on the plow ¤ ¤ Keep your
00:24:49.92\00:24:57.13
hand on the plow ¤ Keep your
hand on the plow and hold on ¤
>> ¤ Hold on, hold on
00:24:57.13\00:25:12.64
>> ¤ Hold on >> ¤
Hold on, hold on ¤ Hold on
00:25:12.64\00:25:20.45
¤ Hold on [
Cheers and applause ]
00:25:20.45\00:25:31.09
>> Thank you, University
Singers. Boy, that was
00:25:33.26\00:25:37.93
beautiful, wasn't it? Thank you,
Juwel Howard, as well --
beautiful solo piece.
00:25:37.93\00:25:45.54
Thank you, Steve Zork.
Thank you, singers. Wow.
00:25:45.54\00:25:49.31
Keep your hand on the Gospel
plow and do what? >> Hold on.
00:25:49.31\00:25:53.98
>> Hold on. Don't let go. Don't
let go. I wish you didn't have
00:25:53.98\00:25:58.95
to take summer vacations. Why
do you guys leave in the summer?
00:25:58.95\00:26:01.69
[ Laughter ] We could
have had you all summer.
00:26:01.69\00:26:05.26
Good to have you back on this
first Sabbath, first weekend of
Andrews University.
00:26:05.26\00:26:11.90
And if you're visiting today,
you stuck your head in and said,
"I got to check out this
00:26:11.90\00:26:17.87
renovation project that they've
been working on all summer." I'm
sure glad you came.
00:26:17.87\00:26:22.54
Delighted to have you. Ooh, we
got a -- we got a -- we got a
great series that begins
00:26:22.54\00:26:29.08
right now -- "Roommates, Bad
Dates, & Soulmates." To help me,
they're going to be
00:26:29.08\00:26:35.46
up here in just a moment, some
of my favorite Gen-Z'ers. You
know what Gen-Z'er is?
00:26:35.46\00:26:41.53
Born between 1995 and 2006. They
got right into that category.
00:26:41.53\00:26:45.33
They're going to join me up
here, and I'll introduce them to
you, and we're going to have
00:26:45.33\00:26:49.44
some fun just thinking about
life. In the meantime, I want to
00:26:49.44\00:26:54.34
pray with you, and let's
see where this journey takes us.
00:26:54.34\00:26:59.11
Father, hold on. We got it. We
got it. Just hold on. Some of us
00:26:59.11\00:27:04.52
here today are feeling like
letting go. This is Labor Day
weekend, already in the new
00:27:04.52\00:27:14.36
season. Don't let them let go.
Don't let anybody here let go.
We're going to hold on.
00:27:14.36\00:27:19.50
There's something to live for.
We're going to hold on. There's
00:27:19.50\00:27:25.34
someone who cares. So, our few
minutes together, make it clear.
We pray in Jesus' name.
00:27:25.34\00:27:29.61
Amen.
00:27:29.61\00:27:30.81
So, years ago, a songwriter
named Harry Nilsson wrote a song
00:27:30.85\00:27:37.55
that begins with these words
-- ¤ One is the loneliest number
00:27:37.55\00:27:44.13
that you'll ever do ¤ ¤
Two can be as bad as one
00:27:44.13\00:27:50.70
¤ It's the loneliest
number since the number one ¤
00:27:50.70\00:27:56.20
Why you looking at me that way?
I'm not going to quit my day
00:27:56.20\00:27:58.47
job. So, don't worry about it.
00:27:58.47\00:28:00.21
I'm fine. You
know, was the songwriter
00:28:00.21\00:28:04.91
right? I think he was.
00:28:04.91\00:28:07.78
I read a piece this
summer, L.A. Times op-ed piece,
00:28:07.78\00:28:11.05
written by the
vice provost of USC.
00:28:11.05\00:28:14.52
You know what those initials
stand for? University of
00:28:14.56\00:28:18.83
Southern California. If you're
a Notre Dame football fan, you
00:28:18.83\00:28:24.23
know what you feel about USC.
So, the vice provost, his
opening words in this op-ed
00:28:24.23\00:28:27.84
piece, put them on the screen,
please. Take a look at this.
00:28:27.84\00:28:31.21
Come on. What's that word?
What's that word? Loneliness.
00:29:00.07\00:29:02.77
¤ One is the loneliest number
It's the truth. So, I read that
00:29:02.77\00:29:09.68
op-ed piece, and I said, "Hmm,
Google, help me out. Is it just
the young that have
00:29:09.68\00:29:14.02
struggles with loneliness?"
And Google kicked up all its
00:29:14.02\00:29:18.29
answers. I found this March this
year, U.S. News and World
Report, reporting on a study
00:29:18.29\00:29:23.99
they did of 20,000 U.S. adults.
And in this study, they found --
let me just share this with
00:29:23.99\00:29:29.30
you -- that nearly half of those
adults felt lonely at least
00:29:29.30\00:29:35.60
sometime. Hmm? And only 53%,
hardly over half, said they had
00:29:35.60\00:29:41.98
meaningful, face-to-face
interactions every day. Whoa.
00:29:41.98\00:29:48.55
One is the loneliest number that
you'll ever do. Some
researchers, in fact, are
00:29:48.55\00:29:56.49
declaring loneliness a national
epidemic in America. Turns out
whether you're young
00:29:56.49\00:30:02.86
or not so young, loneliness is
an equal-opportunity big hurt.
Come on. So, what do we do?
00:30:02.86\00:30:11.17
We're surrounded by people. I
got a thousand followers on my
social-media account, but I'm
00:30:11.17\00:30:17.85
lonely. What's up with that?
One more word from our friend,
00:30:17.85\00:30:22.65
the vice provost, who is Varun
Soni. His words on the screen
00:30:22.65\00:30:27.42
here... Kids aren't the only one
asking the question. Married or
00:30:40.27\00:30:43.41
single doesn't matter, young or
not so young. People are
wondering, "How do I" -- put
00:30:43.41\00:30:47.61
that on the screen again,
please. "How do I make friends?"
"Roommates, Bad Dates, &
00:30:47.61\00:30:52.05
Soulmates" -- this isn't just
for teeny-boppers. This is for
you and me, whatever
00:30:52.05\00:30:57.79
your age is, because we're all
in this together. I want to
share with you four
00:30:57.79\00:31:04.19
secrets to growing a friendship
forever. Four secrets.
00:31:04.19\00:31:08.50
I'm gonna start with this word
from the Creator, a very
provocative word, by the way, at
00:31:08.50\00:31:14.17
the beginning of human history,
the Creator. Listen to this.
00:31:14.17\00:31:18.27
This is Genesis, chapter 2.
Genesis 2:18. "Then the Lord God
00:31:18.27\00:31:24.85
said, "It is not good for the
man" -- he's talking about Adam
there -- "to be alone; I will
00:31:24.85\00:31:29.92
make a companion who can help
him." He's talking about Eve. We
all know -- those of you that
00:31:29.92\00:31:35.06
read the New Testament know
that Jesus is the Creator of the
00:31:35.06\00:31:38.53
universe. So, that's the
preincarnate Christ saying, "You
know what? It is not good for a
00:31:38.53\00:31:42.46
man to be alone. It's not
good for anybody to be alone.
00:31:42.46\00:31:44.93
I'm gonna make a partner.
I'm gonna give you a friend. You
00:31:44.93\00:31:50.87
need a friend." Some people read
that line and say, "Aha! You
know what this is telling us
00:31:50.87\00:31:53.58
to do? This is requiring
everybody to get married."
00:31:53.58\00:31:57.81
It's like this little girl who
came home from Vacation Bible
00:31:57.81\00:32:01.08
School, and mommy said, "What
did you learn at Vacation Bible
School?" And the little girl,
00:32:01.08\00:32:04.65
"Our teacher told us about Noah
and the ark and how the animals
went in two by two."
00:32:04.65\00:32:09.06
And the mother said, "Well, what
did you learn from that?" And
the little girl replied,
00:32:09.06\00:32:14.13
"Yo, you got to get married
if you don't want to be left
00:32:14.13\00:32:19.73
behind." [ Laughter ] I don't
think that's what God is trying
to teach to that story
00:32:19.73\00:32:26.07
because the truth of the matter
is, come on, singles, some of
the greatest figures in
00:32:26.07\00:32:31.98
Holy Scripture, our Lord Jesus
Himself, they were single all
their lives, as Jesus was.
00:32:31.98\00:32:37.99
So, this is not God saying, "You
got to get married in order to
00:32:37.99\00:32:42.22
be happy." So, we just got that
one out of this little series
00:32:42.22\00:32:46.36
quickly. No. "One" -- that's
what the Creator is saying. "You
were made for people.
00:32:46.36\00:32:50.83
You were not made -- one is
the loneliest number that you'll
00:32:50.83\00:32:55.27
ever do. You were not made to be
alone. I'm gonna help you find a
00:32:55.27\00:33:00.08
friend." "Roommates, Bad Dates,
Soulmates." So, the big question
00:33:00.08\00:33:05.38
is, if I've been created for
friends, how am I going to make
those friends? And, by the way,
00:33:05.38\00:33:12.05
it's not just about making
friends. It's also about keeping
friends, because some of you are
00:33:12.05\00:33:14.82
saying, "Man, I have no need of
this, because I already have all
the friends I want."
00:33:14.82\00:33:18.53
Yeah, but can you keep your
friends? So, we plunge into this
00:33:18.53\00:33:26.37
together. It's interesting when
you talk about making friends,
00:33:26.37\00:33:31.87
by the way. Well, they did
a study over in Norway, 15,000
00:33:31.87\00:33:35.41
people in this survey, and they
found out that based on your
age, they can tell the kind of
00:33:35.41\00:33:40.28
friendship you're focused on.
This is fascinating. Let's put
00:33:40.28\00:33:43.62
it on the screen. Between 18 and
29, if that's your age, you're
looking for quantity.
00:33:43.62\00:33:47.19
You want lots and lots of
friends. "Look at how many
00:33:47.19\00:33:50.29
friends I have. Can you see
this? Lookit -- those are all my
00:33:50.29\00:33:52.63
friends." Alright? So,
quantity's a big deal from
00:33:52.63\00:33:55.80
18 to 29. From 30 to 64,
quality -- they want a deepening
00:33:55.80\00:34:00.57
relationship, not many friends.
"I just want to go deeper." And
00:34:00.57\00:34:04.54
65 and older? I couldn't find
anything. I think they're
saying, "Look. At 65 and older,
00:34:04.54\00:34:08.94
you ought to be glad you're
alive and just get on with it."
00:34:08.94\00:34:11.68
[ Laughter ] "Who needs this?"
So, the good news is, we're
00:34:11.68\00:34:20.19
gonna share both. We're gonna
help you up your friend count,
and we're gonna help you deepen
00:34:20.19\00:34:23.56
your relationships. That's the
deal. Now, a Dr. Stephen Johnson
00:34:23.56\00:34:26.26
in the book "Friendship Factor,"
a delightful book if you can
ever get a hold of it, he says,
00:34:26.26\00:34:30.00
"Listen. You need to ask
yourself four questions because
00:34:30.00\00:34:32.97
some of you are saying, 'Man, I
got all the friends I need. I
got the friends of the
00:34:32.97\00:34:35.50
world.' Okay, we're gonna
find out. I'm gonna run four
00:34:35.50\00:34:39.94
questions by you, and you're
gonna check and see if your
friends match this, because if
00:34:39.94\00:34:45.31
they match this, then you got
some serious friends." Alright?
Let's put four questions on the
00:34:45.31\00:34:48.35
screen. Question number one...
00:34:48.35\00:34:49.85
The fire this very week in the
village of Berrien Springs
Saturday night -- wasn't that
00:34:57.09\00:35:02.56
something? That fire --
immediately, 40 -- in an
apartment complex --
00:35:02.56\00:35:08.74
gone. Forty people displaced.
A bunch of them had to pull
00:35:08.74\00:35:12.87
their cellphones out and say,
"Hey, yo, yo, yo, this is bad.
Can I stay with you for a
00:35:12.87\00:35:18.15
while?" So, question number one,
do you have friends nearby --
00:35:18.15\00:35:22.28
the key word -- put that back on
the screen, question number one
00:35:22.28\00:35:26.42
again, please. The key word
there is, "Do you have at least
one person nearby?"
00:35:26.42\00:35:29.89
We're not talking about your mom
and dad across the world. We're
talking somebody nearby
00:35:29.89\00:35:34.36
whom you can call on in times
of personal distress. Here comes
00:35:34.36\00:35:38.30
question number two...
00:35:38.30\00:35:39.23
Yo, ding-dong or knock at the
dormitory door. "Yo, I'm here."
00:35:45.01\00:35:49.48
"Come on in." Do you have some
of those? Good. I'm glad for
00:35:49.48\00:35:54.05
you. Here's
question number three...
00:35:54.05\00:35:55.58
Karen and I want to do some
biking this weekend. "Yo, you
want to go biking?"
00:35:58.49\00:36:01.69
Do you have friends like that?
And, finally, question number
00:36:01.69\00:36:05.03
four... Whoa! Now we're
getting down to brass tacks.
00:36:09.03\00:36:13.67
Now, if you're a student, the
likelihood of that is pretty
low, if you have students for
00:36:16.04\00:36:21.61
friends, but read
the rest of the question.
00:36:21.61\00:36:24.41
If you're not sure about any of
these questions, and you'd like
to up your friend count or
00:36:32.35\00:36:37.59
deepen your relationships, I got
good news for you. You're in the
00:36:37.59\00:36:42.46
right place at the right time.
That's what we're going after.
Now, I want to bring my Gen-Z'er
00:36:42.46\00:36:46.57
friends up. You know
what Gen-Z is, don't you?
00:36:46.57\00:36:49.04
Born between 1995 and 2006.
Okay, so, come on up, guys.
These are college students,
00:36:49.04\00:36:53.68
university students here at
Andrews, and their names are
officially in the worship
00:36:53.68\00:36:58.55
bulletin. You want to get the
full names, but I'm gonna start
00:36:58.55\00:37:03.15
here with Alex because Alex my
man is majoring in psychology --
00:37:03.15\00:37:07.69
good guy to have. By the way, I
met all through the school year
with a group we call the
00:37:07.69\00:37:11.76
Collegiate Council, and there
are a whole bunch more that are
not here, but these three did
00:37:11.76\00:37:15.46
some research this summer and
shared their research with me.
And so, I want to honor that.
00:37:15.46\00:37:19.70
So, Alex is here. He's a
psychology major. We got Rebecca
00:37:19.70\00:37:23.41
right beside Alex. She is
finishing up on nursing. Both of
these are finishing up.
00:37:23.41\00:37:27.04
You got William on the other
side of the pulpit. William is
00:37:27.04\00:37:30.85
architecture. Now, architecture
means you got to go five years
just to get your basic minimum.
00:37:30.85\00:37:34.98
So, William is gonna be here
just a little longer. Guys, I
00:37:34.98\00:37:39.35
want to talk about social media.
Come on. That's the big deal
00:37:39.35\00:37:43.09
right now. What did I read? 51%
of the planet is under the age
00:37:43.09\00:37:47.76
of 25. 98% of teens on the
planet own smartphones. And the
average of young, from
00:37:47.76\00:37:56.74
13 to 24, the average is
100 times checking in on their
00:37:56.74\00:38:07.35
social media. Okay? Let's roll
this little video because we got
00:38:07.35\00:38:11.15
this video. It's a cute, little
setup, and we need to see what
this video's trying to tell us.
00:38:11.15\00:38:15.96
Please. >> Huh, Lisa just
got promoted to manager at work.
00:38:15.96\00:38:22.36
Tsk. I got to say something to
her. I'm gonna
say...congratulations.
00:38:22.36\00:38:28.67
You're amazing.
LOL! Oh, here's Lisa.
00:38:28.67\00:38:32.81
She wants -- she's planning a
party to celebrate this thing. I
don't think I'm gonna go to
00:38:32.81\00:38:39.08
this. Sorry, Lisa, I can't come.
I'll be out of town that day.
00:38:39.08\00:38:45.02
Ah, it's not true, but Lisa is
making a big deal about nothing.
00:38:45.02\00:38:51.66
Look. Jimmy's in Italy. And
he's with Karen and Carlos, too?
00:38:51.66\00:38:56.53
And they wanted me to go with
them, but I was just so behind
on all of my favorite TV shows,
00:38:56.53\00:39:01.07
and I really didn't have time
to travel right now. [ Cellphone
00:39:01.07\00:39:04.61
rings ] Hello? Oh, hi, Jess.
Okay, well, you said this week
00:39:04.61\00:39:12.18
or this weekend?
Oh. Okay, so, tonight.
00:39:12.18\00:39:17.69
Um...well, I really appreciate
it, but, um, I got to work late
00:39:17.69\00:39:24.46
tonight. And the rest of the
week, too. Okay. Thank you. You
00:39:24.46\00:39:29.33
have a good day. Thank you,
Jess. Alright, we'll talk to you
00:39:29.33\00:39:32.50
later. Bye. [ Sighs ]
You're such a good listener.
00:39:32.50\00:39:36.74
I know. You're
such a good listener.
00:39:36.74\00:39:38.74
This is why I
love talking to you.
00:39:38.77\00:39:40.84
I know. Who needs
other friends when we
00:39:40.84\00:39:43.01
have each
other? You're the best.
00:39:43.01\00:39:44.81
You're the best! I know.
00:39:44.81\00:39:46.48
>> So, Alex, come on. You did
the research this summer on
interpersonal relationships.
00:39:50.42\00:39:54.19
You sent me that paper, and I
have it right here. I was
fascinated by this,
00:39:54.19\00:39:57.76
intrigued. "Daniel" -- you quote
him -- "Daniel Gulati, in his
00:39:57.76\00:40:02.50
article, 'Facebook Is Making Us
Miserable'" -- No, social media
00:40:02.50\00:40:07.80
is making us miserable? Come
on! What's up with that, Alex?
00:40:07.80\00:40:10.81
>> A good way to answer is
another research that was done
in 1982, most people had a
00:40:10.81\00:40:16.34
confidant or somebody they could
really rely on and talk to. They
had about an average of
00:40:16.34\00:40:21.82
three. >> Thirty? >> Three.
00:40:21.82\00:40:24.05
>> Three. >> In 2004,
that number dropped to two.
00:40:24.05\00:40:28.56
In 2010, Pew Research did, among
the same topic, and they found
that it was two again, but
00:40:28.56\00:40:35.96
second and very close to being
first, most people said none.
And social media, we drive for
00:40:35.96\00:40:41.64
this fact of being connected
with people, but it seems to be
really that it drives us to not
00:40:41.64\00:40:47.98
have true connection to people
and end up being more alone
after being on social media than
00:40:47.98\00:40:54.38
before. >> That's amazing to me,
that technology creates a silo,
00:40:54.38\00:40:58.99
and we're just living in that
silo. Now, you guys are all
social-media experts, I know.
00:40:58.99\00:41:04.36
But when I think of social
media, a lot of people like to
kind of dis social media, like,
00:41:04.36\00:41:09.86
"Well, let's get rid of
social media, get rid of this
00:41:09.86\00:41:14.14
technology." We're not doing
that. There have to be some
00:41:14.14\00:41:17.71
upsides, okay? So, let's just
think out loud. What would you
say -- any of you -- an upside
00:41:17.71\00:41:22.88
to social media? >> Well, Pastor
Dwight, I think we know, and as
00:41:22.88\00:41:26.51
a church, social media has been
a huge part of our ministry, and
we were able to reach so many
00:41:26.51\00:41:30.75
people in different parts of the
world. But, personally, from my
experience, I have had the
00:41:30.75\00:41:34.66
chance to grow up in different
countries. I lived in Burma,
00:41:34.66\00:41:38.16
Philippines, and now in the
States, and if there wasn't
social media, I wouldn't be able
00:41:38.16\00:41:42.10
to still connect with my friends
from different parts of the
country. In fact, my very best
00:41:42.10\00:41:46.33
friend, Kimberly, she's in the
Philippines at the moment, and
it's only through social media
00:41:46.33\00:41:50.34
that we're able to connect each
other until now, after several
00:41:50.34\00:41:53.71
years. >> So, it's not about
getting rid of social media.
It's not about getting rid of
00:41:53.71\00:41:57.61
the technology. It can't
be. It's a very useful tool.
00:41:57.61\00:42:01.35
But -- and I was looking through
your paper between services, and
I came across this "Facebook
00:42:01.35\00:42:09.19
envy." In other
words, what's going on there?
00:42:09.19\00:42:12.53
Will, come on. Jump in. What's
going on -- Facebook envy.
00:42:12.53\00:42:16.26
Why are people looking at this
and "Uhh..."? >> So, this summer
00:42:16.26\00:42:21.57
I came across a term that I
guess I haven't been able to
place yet, and it was that the
00:42:21.57\00:42:28.34
new generation is tech dependent
and not tech savvy. >> Mm-hmm.
00:42:28.34\00:42:32.21
>> And I see that in the light
that when we're needing to go
00:42:32.25\00:42:37.49
somewhere, for example,
need to talk to someone.
00:42:37.49\00:42:42.26
We don't go to that person
directly, but, instead, we may
just text them, and we avoid
00:42:42.29\00:42:48.96
these encounters that we could
have, more genuine encounters,
because we become tech
00:42:48.96\00:42:55.30
dependent. >> Yeah. >>
And I believe that kind of
00:42:55.30\00:42:57.77
goes along with Facebook, as
well, because instead of going
to someone, asking them,
00:42:57.77\00:43:01.74
"What's going on in your life?"
and just finding out from the
person themselves, you can just
00:43:01.74\00:43:05.88
scroll down their feed and see
everything that's going on. >>
00:43:05.88\00:43:09.62
Yeah. This thing about curating
-- you know, a museum curator.
00:43:09.65\00:43:13.66
What does he do?
What does she do?
00:43:13.66\00:43:16.32
She puts out the exhibit exactly
like she wants everybody to see
00:43:16.32\00:43:20.83
it. That's what's going on with
00:43:20.83\00:43:23.00
social media now.
00:43:23.00\00:43:24.07
Unpack that for us. Come
on -- this curating business.
00:43:24.10\00:43:27.34
>> I think that's where the
danger and where social media
kind of brings us down, even
00:43:27.34\00:43:32.17
though it has great positive
aspects, is that we look and we
see all of the positive, all the
00:43:32.17\00:43:37.38
great things that everyone else
is doing, and then we look and
reflect on our own life, and we
00:43:37.38\00:43:42.62
realize, "Hey, I'm not in
Europe. I'm not doing this crazy
00:43:42.62\00:43:46.42
thing. I'm not doing this
awesome thing." And so, because
00:43:46.42\00:43:50.23
of that, it brings us down, and
we end up reflecting and being
saddened by our own experience
00:43:50.23\00:43:55.96
because we're not living this
"beautiful" life that everyone
else is. >> And, also, it could
00:43:55.96\00:44:01.50
even turn into a competition,
you know, who has more followers
-- this façade of who's more
00:44:01.50\00:44:06.71
popular or who has more friends?
And I think it's easy to get
00:44:06.71\00:44:11.75
trapped in that. >> Yeah,
it just leaves a hole in your
00:44:11.75\00:44:17.22
heart. Now listen. Before you
sit down, there's a verse --
let's put it on the screen here,
00:44:17.22\00:44:21.39
Proverbs 18:24. There it is.
00:44:21.39\00:44:22.42
So, you guys are maxed out with
social media, but, real quick,
just something you do on campus
00:44:26.80\00:44:34.44
that reaches out of your cocoon
to be a friend to somebody. >> A
thing I love doing is just
00:44:34.44\00:44:41.04
looking up from my phone and
seeing who's around me that I
have a chance to talk to,
00:44:41.04\00:44:46.01
chance to interact with. Some of
the most meaningful experiences
00:44:46.01\00:44:50.02
in my life have come from that.
Hey, I'm single, and other
people -- that may be a possible
00:44:50.02\00:44:53.66
opportunity to find your future
girlfriend, your future spouse,
00:44:53.66\00:44:57.36
you know? >> Mm-hmm. >> There's
a lot of opportunities there.
00:44:57.36\00:44:59.19
>> Mm-hmm. Anybody else?
>> Well, I guess for me on a
00:44:59.19\00:45:04.63
daily basis, it's an
intentionality that I try to
00:45:04.63\00:45:08.37
have. Every morning, I believe
that where we ground ourselves
is in Jesus Christ.
00:45:08.37\00:45:13.24
And people see that, you know?
If one day I forget, or if I
say, "Mm, I'm not feeling
00:45:13.24\00:45:17.68
today," and I forget to talk to
my Creator, my interactions
throughout the day, I think
00:45:17.68\00:45:22.15
people can feel that. And
they can see the intentionality
00:45:22.15\00:45:26.09
between me loving them through
Jesus' eyes and me trying to
love them just out of my own
00:45:26.09\00:45:30.89
self because at the end of the
day, God is love. >> Praise God,
guys. >> And we can't reproduce
00:45:30.89\00:45:34.93
that. >> I think it's not just
a daily thing, right? It's about
00:45:34.93\00:45:38.80
maintaining that friendship, and
for me the most important thing
is knowing my worth in Christ
00:45:38.80\00:45:43.17
first. >> Mm-hmm. >> And my main
goal in life is to pursue that
00:45:43.17\00:45:46.91
relationship and that walk with
Jesus. So, I look around campus,
and I say, "Who else can I take
00:45:46.91\00:45:50.71
on that journey with me? Who
else can walk with me?" If I see
someone sitting alone,
00:45:50.71\00:45:54.52
or if when I pray and say,
"Hey," the Holy Spirit speaks,
and say, "I want you to pray for
00:45:54.52\00:46:00.32
this person today." And I truly,
truly believe that God places us
00:46:00.32\00:46:05.46
daily in just areas in exactly
where we need to be to reach out
to those around us.
00:46:05.46\00:46:08.43
>> Hey, guys, that's some young
wisdom -- beautiful. Thank you
for sharing with us.
00:46:08.43\00:46:12.70
Put your hands together
for our presenters, our Gen-Z
00:46:12.70\00:46:16.77
presenters. [ Applause ] Okay,
let's run through these. I'm
gonna fire these off at you.
00:46:16.77\00:46:24.18
Would you kindly jot them down,
please? Take your study guide
00:46:24.18\00:46:27.85
out now. There's a study guide
tucked into your worship
bulletin. Looks like this.
00:46:27.85\00:46:31.65
At the bottom of the page --
we've already covered all that,
so get down to the bottom, "Four
00:46:31.65\00:46:36.29
secrets to growing friendships."
00:46:36.29\00:46:37.99
And while you're doing that,
let's put a title slide on for
00:46:38.03\00:46:42.06
the viewers. There we go.
00:46:42.06\00:46:43.80
New Perceptions.
Those of you that are
00:46:43.80\00:46:45.77
livestreaming already know the
site, but those of you watching
00:46:45.77\00:46:48.74
on television now, or some
delay somewhere, there you go --
00:46:48.74\00:46:51.57
newperceptions.tv.
You're looking for a brand-new
00:46:51.57\00:46:53.98
miniseries, only three long --
yeah, ushers, would you please
00:46:53.98\00:46:56.78
stand. And hold
your hand up if you
00:46:56.78\00:46:58.48
didn't get one of
these when you came in.
00:46:58.48\00:46:59.71
Just hold your
hand up. Here they come.
00:46:59.71\00:47:01.25
So, anyway, 3-part series
-- "Roommates, Bad Dates, &
00:47:01.25\00:47:03.99
Soulmates." This
is our first part.
00:47:03.99\00:47:06.45
Let's go.
00:47:06.45\00:47:09.02
Friendship secret number one --
jot it down, please. Less of me
00:47:09.06\00:47:14.10
and more of you. This is the
principle called
"unselfishness." It's like this
00:47:14.10\00:47:17.57
guy who was talking with this
girl, and he was going on and on
about himself, all the places he
00:47:17.57\00:47:21.70
had been to, all the food he
had eaten, all the things he had
00:47:21.70\00:47:24.84
done. And he finally ran out of
steam, and he said, "Whew,
that's enough of me talking
00:47:24.84\00:47:29.08
about me. Why don't you talk?
What do you think about me?" [
00:47:29.08\00:47:33.58
Laughter ] Yeah, really.
It's just kind of like, "Are you
00:47:33.58\00:47:36.92
serious?" Jennifer Schwirzer
says, "Listen. Don't be too hard
00:47:36.92\00:47:39.62
on him. We all do this." Put it
on the screen. She's writing...
00:47:39.62\00:47:41.96
"We have all done it, and we
have all suffered when others
00:47:41.99\00:47:44.56
have done it. The
monologuist" -- I like that
00:47:44.56\00:47:47.23
word -- "fails to hold
an actual conversation."
00:47:47.23\00:47:50.43
You have met people like that,
present company excepted, of
00:47:54.24\00:47:57.31
course. 1
Corinthians 13:5 -- what does
00:47:57.31\00:48:00.74
the Bible say?
00:48:00.74\00:48:01.81
Ah, the big love chapter.
Love is unselfish. It is not
00:48:01.84\00:48:08.72
self-seeking. Friendship secret
number one -- less of me and
more of you. And, by the way, it
00:48:08.72\00:48:14.72
is not always
about you. Relax. Relax.
00:48:14.72\00:48:19.29
Okay, friendship secret number
two -- jot it down. Let's talk.
00:48:19.29\00:48:22.70
Oh, this is the great principle
for any relationship on Earth.
You got to communicate --
00:48:22.70\00:48:27.34
communication. You need to know
less of me and more of you does
00:48:27.34\00:48:31.41
not mean less of talk. No, you
got to talk and talk and talk a
00:48:31.41\00:48:34.41
lot. That's what makes
relationships work. That's what
00:48:34.41\00:48:37.98
makes friendships work. That's
what makes marriages work.
00:48:37.98\00:48:40.35
You've got to talk. We've got
to communicate. The trick with
00:48:40.35\00:48:44.85
social media -- as the Gen-Z's
were just talking about -- the
trick is that you think you're
00:48:44.85\00:48:49.79
having this, you're Snapchatting
away, and you think you're
having this great conversation.
00:48:49.79\00:48:53.60
You know what you're doing?
You're just letting the other
person know on the other end of
00:48:53.60\00:48:57.10
the line that you're
still breathing. That's it.
00:48:57.10\00:49:00.87
There's nothing deep going on
here. It just becomes a way of
00:49:00.87\00:49:06.01
"Oh, we're in touch." No, no,
no, no, no, no. You got to talk.
00:49:06.01\00:49:09.88
I like this. The
husband-and-wife counselors, Les
and Leslie Parrott, in their
00:49:09.88\00:49:14.28
book, "Saving Your Marriage
Before It Starts" -- jot this
00:49:14.28\00:49:18.82
down. "Consider this
fact" -- their writing.
00:49:18.85\00:49:20.86
"Men say three times as many
words in public as they do in
00:49:20.86\00:49:24.73
private." Will
that be true, guys?
00:49:24.73\00:49:27.23
Three times as many
words in public as in private.
00:49:27.23\00:49:30.47
Well, you're not sure,
are you? What about the women?
00:49:30.47\00:49:33.54
"Women say three times as many
words in private as they do in
00:49:33.54\00:49:36.37
public." Huh? What do you think?
00:49:36.37\00:49:41.08
One wife told these counselors,
one wife told them, "Talking to
my husband is like playing
00:49:41.11\00:49:46.35
tennis with no one in the
other court." [ Laughter ]
00:49:46.35\00:49:52.85
Do these balls ever come back?
Yeah. One counselor suggested
00:49:52.85\00:49:59.83
the amount of time a couple
spends in an average week, the
amount of time in meaningful
00:49:59.83\00:50:06.10
conversation -- 17 minutes.
"Honey, where's the remote?" is
00:50:06.10\00:50:10.81
not conversation. [ Laughter ]
Seventeen minutes of meaningful
00:50:10.81\00:50:15.81
conversation. Think about that.
Whoa. Now my wife, Karen, she's
00:50:15.81\00:50:18.68
sitting on the front row, so I
have to be careful now. My wife,
Karen, likes to talk,
00:50:18.68\00:50:22.58
alright? But I like to
talk, so that's not a negative.
00:50:22.58\00:50:25.95
She likes to talk. But I keep
forgetting the little rule --
two ears, one mouth.
00:50:25.95\00:50:33.70
Why? Because you do this twice
as much -- supposed to -- as
00:50:33.70\00:50:38.33
this. And when she comes home,
and she wants to just go on
about her work or a conversation
00:50:38.33\00:50:43.94
she had with so-and-so or an
e-mail thread, as soon as she
starts talking, do you know what
00:50:43.94\00:50:49.28
I'm thinking? "I can
solve this. I can do this."
00:50:49.28\00:50:53.11
And I'm now working through,
"Well, I'm not even gonna
listen, 'cause I'm planning.
00:50:53.11\00:50:58.92
This is the idea!" You know
what? She could give two hoots
00:50:58.92\00:51:03.66
about any solution that I can
offer. You know what she wants?
Compassionate, caring listening.
00:51:03.66\00:51:09.06
That's all. When she
gets it all out, she's good.
00:51:09.06\00:51:12.17
And that was our conversation.
Sometimes, we got to remember
00:51:12.17\00:51:17.27
this. Active listening is a part
of active talking. You got to
00:51:17.27\00:51:24.11
listen. It's not just
yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak.
00:51:24.11\00:51:27.18
Alright? Oh, this is good. Alan
McGinnis in his book "Friendship
00:51:27.18\00:51:32.65
Factor"... Because some guys
spend the evening with their
wife this way -- "Mm-hmm,
00:51:36.16\00:51:39.83
uh-huh, yeah, no, no, mnh-mnh,
mm-hmm, grunt-grunt-grunt-grunt,
00:51:39.83\00:51:44.00
mm-hmm, mm-hmm." And then they
want to jump in bed with that
girl and be intimate.
00:51:44.00\00:51:48.64
You just blew it, buddy.
Conversation is how intimacy is
00:51:48.64\00:51:55.58
developed. Yeah. Oh, let's talk.
Let's talk. Okay, so, friendship
00:51:55.58\00:51:58.55
secret number two -- let's talk.
There are only four of these.
Here comes number three.
00:51:58.55\00:52:02.35
Friendship
secret number three...
00:52:02.35\00:52:04.25
It's the gift of a good
forgetter. Every friendship
00:52:06.82\00:52:10.76
needs the gift of a good
forgetter because scorekeepers
destroy relationships.
00:52:10.76\00:52:14.56
You know that. I want
to put this on the screen.
00:52:14.56\00:52:17.57
Jacques Vaudre -- he is a family
therapist down in the Caribbean.
00:52:17.57\00:52:21.04
His wonderful book, "Six
Dynamic Keys." On the screen...
00:52:21.04\00:52:25.01
"The idea that love involves
some sort of quid pro quo" --
that means this for that -- "is,
00:52:29.84\00:52:34.75
at best, evidence of immaturity
that needs to be outgrown."
00:52:34.75\00:52:37.69
True story -- I once knew two
men who could not forgive, who
00:52:46.63\00:52:53.07
could not forgive. One of them
did something that ticked the
other guy off. I was in the
00:52:53.07\00:52:57.77
middle of their friendship. I
saw their friendship. They were
the best of friends.
00:52:57.77\00:53:01.61
But one day, one of them did
something that just ticked the
other off, and guess what?
00:53:01.61\00:53:06.35
The other became a scorekeeper.
And because of that
score-keeping, that friendship
00:53:06.35\00:53:12.52
could never be restored at all.
It was a sad and sorry story. By
the way, the only way that
00:53:12.52\00:53:19.73
friendship can be restored today
is if they both set the score
back to zero-zero and then quit
00:53:19.73\00:53:25.70
counting. That's the only
way, guys. In marriages, in
00:53:25.70\00:53:30.01
friendships, you can't keep
score. Jesus taught us how to
pray. It's the Lord's Prayer.
00:53:30.01\00:53:35.74
We're gonna sing it in just a
moment. In the Lord's Prayer is
00:53:35.74\00:53:41.02
this line, Matthew 6:12. Jesus
says -- and the prayer includes
the words "And forgive
00:53:41.02\00:53:47.72
us our debts as we also have" --
that's the NIV. And then I'm
adding, because the
00:53:47.72\00:53:53.76
Greek tense really suggests this
-- "And forgive us our debts as
we also have already
00:53:53.76\00:53:58.83
forgiven our debtors." That's
what Jesus is saying to pray.
00:53:58.83\00:54:02.40
In other words, "Dear God,
please treat me the way I have
already treated my friends."
00:54:02.40\00:54:09.24
And God said, "Boom, what about
that score-keeping?" "Oh, come
00:54:09.24\00:54:15.85
on, God. Don't worry about
that." "No, no, no, no, no." God
00:54:15.85\00:54:18.75
says, "Listen. You want me to
forgive you? You're holding onto
an unforgiving spirit.
00:54:18.75\00:54:21.86
And if you're holding onto it, I
can't take it away, anyway.
That's why I can't" -- God's not
00:54:21.86\00:54:25.83
being mean. "I just can't."
Forgive us our sins as we have
00:54:25.83\00:54:29.43
already quit keeping score for
others. Jesus, in the Garden of
00:54:29.43\00:54:33.90
Gethsemane, in that dark and
awful moment, do you know when
Judas comes walking up to Him,
00:54:33.90\00:54:38.84
one of the inner circle -- he is
gonna betray Him right now. Do
you know what Jesus called
00:54:38.84\00:54:43.78
Judas? Put it on the
screen. Matthew 26:50.
00:54:43.78\00:54:46.45
Jesus calls him
friend. Friend. Wow.
00:54:46.45\00:54:53.86
Because that's what friends do.
They're good forgivers. They're
00:54:53.86\00:55:00.70
good forgetters. Friendship
secret number three -- quit
00:55:00.70\00:55:02.80
keeping score. Finally,
friendship secret number four --
00:55:02.83\00:55:06.43
I'm willing to lose so that
you can win. It's called the
00:55:06.43\00:55:10.17
principle of self-sacrifice.
If you're not willing to
00:55:10.17\00:55:12.34
sacrifice for that relationship,
I don't care how shallow or how
00:55:12.34\00:55:15.31
deep it is, and I don't care
with whom it is, if you're not
00:55:15.31\00:55:18.55
willing to sacrifice for that
relationship, you've lost it.
00:55:18.55\00:55:21.72
It's gone. It's nothing but
surface. True friendship, true
00:55:21.75\00:55:28.36
friends sacrifice for each
other. And the most compelling
evidence of that is a mother
00:55:28.36\00:55:35.06
loving her child. Saw some
beautiful children and beautiful
moms just coming up
00:55:35.06\00:55:37.60
here a moment ago for the
children's story. You know what?
00:55:37.60\00:55:41.24
I conducted a funeral once of a
baby who was burned to death in
00:55:41.24\00:55:45.91
a house fire. Yeah, it was just
utterly sad. You've read the
stories. We've all read them, of
00:55:45.91\00:55:52.01
the mother when she realizes.
She gets outside, and she
realizes, "One, two, three.
00:55:52.01\00:55:55.48
We're missing one!"
00:55:55.48\00:55:58.02
She's screaming. She
starts to go back in.
00:55:58.05\00:56:00.26
The neighbors grab her.
The burly firemen, they hold
00:56:00.26\00:56:02.86
onto her. If they
would release her for
00:56:02.86\00:56:05.43
one moment, boom, she'd be
in that fire, dead, as well.
00:56:05.43\00:56:11.77
Willing to lay down
her life for that child.
00:56:11.77\00:56:15.47
On the eve of his execution,
Jesus himself spoke words that
00:56:15.47\00:56:18.94
have become
immortal now -- John 15:13.
00:56:18.94\00:56:22.91
Let's say these
words out loud together...
00:56:22.94\00:56:25.28
Which is precisely what Jesus
did on the cross for sinners
00:56:33.92\00:56:37.46
like you and me. He laid down
His life, and guess what?
Because He laid down His life
00:56:37.46\00:56:41.23
for His friends, you are
a friend of His. Absolutely.
00:56:41.23\00:56:44.90
You are a friend of His. He laid
down His life for you. He did it
00:56:44.90\00:56:49.54
for me. And when you have a
friend who has laid down His
life for you, can you ever have
00:56:49.54\00:56:54.51
a closer friend in the world,
in the universe? BFF? Are you
00:56:54.51\00:57:02.72
kidding? It's Jesus. It's Jesus.
00:57:02.72\00:57:05.65
>> Think of the last time
someone said, "I'm praying
00:57:08.42\00:57:11.36
for you." Didn't
it give you a sense of
00:57:11.36\00:57:13.40
peace and reassurance
that somebody cares for me?
00:57:13.40\00:57:16.03
I know how I feel when I get an
e-mail from one of our viewers
saying, "Yo, Dwight.
00:57:16.06\00:57:19.70
I've been praying for you
lately." There's nothing like
00:57:19.70\00:57:22.44
knowing someone is praying for
you. So I want to offer you an
opportunity to partner -- let
00:57:22.44\00:57:26.24
me, let us partner
with you in prayer.
00:57:26.24\00:57:28.91
If you have a special
prayer request or a praise of
00:57:28.94\00:57:30.81
thanksgiving you'd like to
share with us, I'm inviting you
00:57:30.81\00:57:33.75
to contact one of
our friendly chaplains.
00:57:33.75\00:57:35.65
It's simple to do.
You can call our toll-free
00:57:35.65\00:57:37.62
number -- 877 -- the two
words "HIS WILL," 877-HIS-WILL.
00:57:37.62\00:57:42.76
That friendly voice that
answers, you tell him, you tell
00:57:42.76\00:57:45.89
her what your prayer need
is, we'll join with you in that
00:57:45.89\00:57:48.93
petition.
00:57:48.93\00:57:50.63
May the God who answers prayer
journey with you these next few
days until we're right back
00:57:50.67\00:57:54.54
here together again next time.
00:57:54.54\00:57:58.97
¤¤ ¤¤
00:57:59.01\00:58:18.29
¤¤
00:58:18.29\00:58:27.97