Participants: Arthur Nowlin (Host), Dr Kim Logan-Nowlin (Host), Daicia Smith
Series Code: MIW
Program Code: MIW000030
|
00:01 Hi, I'm Dr. Kim Logan-Nowlin.
00:03 And I'm Arthur Nowlin. 00:04 And Welcome to "Making it Work." 00:38 You know, Arthur, the Bible says, 00:40 in Psalms 119:133 00:45 "Order my steps in the Lord." 00:49 Order my steps in the Lord. 00:51 And you know, I love that song, I played all the time in home. 00:53 Yes. 00:54 And when you think about God ordering your steps, 00:56 what does that mean to you? 00:58 Keep me aligned with His favorite. 01:00 All right. 01:01 You know, help me to maintain my focus. 01:05 Yes. 01:06 You know, most important He directing my path. 01:08 Directing your path. 01:09 And some of you today may be in a situation 01:11 where you don't know how God is ordering your steps. 01:14 You don't hear from God, 01:16 you don't know what direction to take. 01:18 But God's way is very clear and when He closes one door, 01:22 He open up a window. That's excellent. 01:24 And pour you out of blessing 01:25 you will have room enough to receive it. 01:27 Well, today, 01:29 we are blessed to have a very special guest with us, 01:31 who God is ordering her steps, Daicia Smith. 01:34 Welcome to "Making It work." Yes, welcome. 01:37 Thank you. Thank you. How're you doing? 01:38 I'm doing well, I'm happy to be here. 01:40 Good you're just dynamic. 01:43 I'm so excited. 01:44 You really? You kind of beaming. 01:46 Yeah. 01:48 Good, good, good. 01:49 Well, listen, well, we're gonna just-- 01:50 just turn it over to you 01:51 because and then we will come in 01:53 and ask some questions. 01:54 But tell us how God has ordered your steps? 01:57 Take us back and how God has brought you to this point? 02:00 Okay, I'm going to try to give you the heritage 02:03 for the sake of time, 02:05 but basically I was born and raised Adventist, 02:09 however my parents divorced when I was really young. 02:13 And my father was not Adventist. 02:17 In the beginning I-- 02:18 We were really active in the church 02:20 and I attended Christian education 02:23 from pre-school through sixth grade. 02:27 But during that time there were a lot of challenges, 02:30 my mom had challenges 02:31 because she was going through things 02:32 with my father and you know, 02:34 she was trying to raise my sister and I 02:37 by herself and it became-- 02:40 It just became a lot I believe. 02:42 And she tried to maintain structure 02:44 and keep us focused. 02:46 And I think when I was going to seventh grade 02:49 I was about 12, 02:51 I had a little bit complex in the school 02:54 because I'm little boyish dress, 02:56 so that's to say the least, and very opinionative. 03:00 So sometimes that can come across 03:02 a little strong to others. 03:03 Okay, all right. But you know that? 03:05 I do, I have become very self aware. 03:07 Okay. 03:08 And so at that time I said, 03:10 I don't want to be with these Adventist people 03:14 and I want to go to a public school 03:16 and my mom allowed me to. 03:18 I think she was just like I know, 03:20 I'll just do it. 03:21 I'll just try to make her happy. 03:22 Okay. 03:23 And I did, and that's where I had been 03:27 trying to go a certain direction 03:29 and that this is how your life should go. 03:31 It should progress you got to school, 03:34 you graduate, you go to college, 03:36 but take it hopefully at Adventist collage, 03:38 that was what the path my mom had kind of 03:40 tried to lay the groundwork for-- 03:42 From K through sixth grade. 03:43 However my life is a good different path. 03:46 And when I was 12 and enter a public school 03:50 it was very different for me. 03:52 That was a time I believe now that between 03:55 12 and 13 children really-- 03:58 They can go either way. 03:59 You can go on what you know, 04:01 what you been taught 04:02 or you can be introduce to something else. 04:04 And I was introduced to other things 04:06 and that lead me 04:08 into a very different path of substances, 04:14 smoking, drinking, 04:17 sex just anything you could name, 04:19 the faith in my body just anything you could name. 04:23 And then while I was in high school 04:25 I met a guy thought I was in love, 04:28 it was just great, I thought it was great. 04:30 Again going against my mom's wishes 04:34 and at that time I was able to drive a little bit, 04:37 so I-- 04:38 I was at that time where she would say, 04:39 well, you don't have to go to Sabbath school 04:40 if you don't want to. 04:41 So of course I just didn't 04:43 and I just got into this relationship. 04:45 I thought it was wonderful, it was very abusive. 04:50 I thought it was great 04:51 because I thought he loved me more than anything else, 04:53 but it was very abusive. 04:54 He started controlling me, 04:55 didn't want me to be around my family, 04:57 said a lot of things. 04:58 You're still in high school during this time? 05:00 Yes, I was in high school. 05:03 And so during this, this is a lot of things 05:06 so I ended up just from being in that crowd 05:09 and that scene I got into a fight 05:13 and was suspended from school. 05:15 And well, indefinitely to school. 05:20 You were terminated? 05:21 Yes, they then said, 05:22 maybe we can try again next year. 05:25 And so I said, well, I don't want to-- 05:28 You know, miss school but-- 05:30 But I just I didn't know what do? 05:31 So I just didn't go to school for little bit snuck 05:34 and ain't go to school. 05:35 My mom didn't know. 05:36 She didn't know? She didn't know. 05:37 So I would get up everyday like I was going to school, 05:39 but I wasn't. 05:42 And make a just-- 05:43 I'm trying to make it better. 05:44 You are okay, go ahead. 05:46 But, yes. 05:47 I hid a lot of things from my mom 05:48 and I think it was because she was working a lot 05:50 and trying to provide 05:52 and it was very easy for me to just kind of pretend 05:55 one way at home, 05:56 but as soon as I walked out of the door 05:58 I was going in my own directions 06:00 and doing what I wanted to do 06:02 or what I thought I wanted to do. 06:04 And so I was really afraid, I wasn't gonna graduate. 06:08 When my mom found out that I was suspended 06:10 because she ended popped up at the school 06:12 because she was a good mom. 06:13 So she came. 06:14 So she would just come and periodically check in, 06:16 you know, so she came in and they told her she doesn't-- 06:20 I didn't go there anymore. 06:21 Oh, my, Lord. 06:22 So she found me, 06:25 and that was not a good day to say the least. 06:28 But she had-- 06:29 She said, she just couldn't do it anymore. 06:32 So she tries to get me to my father 06:34 and my father couldn't do it either, 06:38 he hadn't been in my life, I was 16 at the time, 06:41 he hadn't been in my life. 06:44 It was very difficult for him to try to 06:45 just step in and be a father. 06:47 But did you go there and you are spending your time? 06:49 No. Okay. 06:50 No contact at all? 06:51 No, not from when I was like four until I was 16. 06:54 I may have seen him five times in that whole time. 06:57 And then when I was 16 she knew where he was, 06:59 so she dropped me off with him and that didn't work. 07:03 So he dropped me off at the bus station and said, 07:07 I can't-- I can't do it. 07:08 So I got on the bus came-- 07:11 went back to Ypsilanti, he was in Battle Creek. 07:13 Came back to Ypsilanti 07:15 and as just started be with my boyfriend 07:19 and was basically homeless for-- 07:21 From then and for about a year. 07:24 You were homeless. 07:25 Homeless, not basically, literally homeless. 07:27 Stand from friend to friend-- 07:28 Because your mom didn't want you back in house? 07:30 I didn't know how to go back to mom and I had-- 07:32 And she had told me if this is the life 07:34 you're gonna live you can't-- 07:36 Come back here? Live here-- 07:37 You can't do it here. 07:38 So I kind of just said, 07:40 I probably could have gone back home, 07:41 I don't know, I didn't ask. 07:43 You never ask. 07:45 I just continued to do what I wanted to do. 07:47 Then when it got really hard I did go back home 07:50 and asked her can I come back home? 07:53 And she allowed me to-- 07:55 When you said things got hard, the abuse? 07:57 The abuse be it-- I was literally in a-- 08:00 In a place that didn't have any water, 08:03 light, gas, it was cold, he was just to be a ridicules, 08:08 I still stayed with him, 08:10 but at that moment I was tired and I wanted to go home. 08:14 And I wanted to be at home with my mom. 08:16 And but then once I got comfortable again at home, 08:21 I said, I was just keep-- 08:22 You and he was still in the background 08:24 kind of in my years life-- 08:25 So when you got comfortable you would, 08:27 you would get an urge and run-- runaway? 08:30 Runaway back. 08:32 Were you still doing the drugs, alcohol? 08:34 You still doing all that lifestyle, you know-- 08:37 So how old were you at this point at this-- 08:39 Seventeen. 08:40 Did you finish high school? 08:41 I did finish high school on time 08:45 by the grace of God because it's-- 08:47 It's funny because I think 08:49 I had a foundation that was built, 08:51 so I had some sense to say, okay, this isn't right, 08:54 I had to find a school. 08:56 So I went to alternative school for year 08:58 and then when I went back home, 09:00 my mom got me back into my regular high school. 09:03 I see. So that could graduate. 09:04 So I did graduate on time. Praise God. 09:07 Okay, now you at a point now you're back and forth, 09:11 he still in your ear having this control, 09:14 you are at home with mom and now what? 09:16 And then I was preparing to go to college. 09:18 Okay. 09:19 And I found out I was pregnant. 09:23 So you're 17 and you're pregnant. 09:24 Seventeen and I'm pregnant 09:26 and ready to move into the dorm. 09:28 And in this-- 09:29 This young man who was abusive was the father? 09:31 Yes. Okay. 09:32 And so at that point and then again my mom said, 09:36 I can't-- I can't do this. 09:38 My grandparents say, we can't do it either, 09:41 we can do a little bit but we really can't do it. 09:45 So they did help move into my dorm. 09:48 How long were you been? It's kind of funny. 09:51 Some-- About a semester, but it was-- 09:53 I mean, as you can imagine being pregnant, 09:55 being alone, 09:57 but with him and he will come to my dorm 09:59 and just beat-- 10:01 I tried to leave him because had hit me 10:03 while I was pregnant and that was when I was like, 10:07 okay, I don't know how long this is gonna work, 10:10 but I still stay because I didn't-- 10:12 I didn't feel like I had a choice. 10:13 I was 17, 10:15 I couldn't get an apartment because I wasn't 18. 10:18 I couldn't-- 10:19 They wouldn't let me a family housing yet 10:21 because they didn't have any space and I wasn't 18. 10:23 Where were you going to school? 10:25 East Elementary School. Okay. 10:27 And so I just-- 10:28 One day, I just picked up and just walk, 10:31 left out of campus. 10:32 I left all my stuff there. 10:33 And just walked away? And I just walked away. 10:35 And that's because I felt like 10:36 I had to figure out what to do for my-- 10:38 For my child before he was born. 10:41 And so he said, he would you know, 10:43 try to help me get a place finally. 10:46 He said that. But he didn't really help me. 10:49 He made me think he was helping me, 10:51 but he wasn't really helping me. 10:52 I was doing it on my own 10:53 but he was just acting like he was a person that do it. 10:57 And so at the end of getting apartment 11:00 when I turn 18, 11:02 I gotten an apartment and subsides housing. 11:05 And obviously I had dropped out of school, 11:07 had my daughter, went through a lot of abuse-- 11:10 A lot of abuse. 11:11 One particular time which was the worse 11:16 and when I said I couldn't do it anymore. 11:18 That was a wake up call. That was my wake up call. 11:20 I had surgery for my gallbladder and he-- 11:25 When I came back from surgery, 11:26 I had staples in my stomach 11:27 and I had a feeding tube in my arm and he said, 11:30 he was gonna kill me. 11:31 Let-- Just let out. 11:34 First he whip me, 11:35 he said he was gonna whip me with a belt 11:37 and it was so hard, when I left the house, 11:40 I had to leave my baby in the house 11:42 and I left with no cloths on. 11:45 And that's was when I just-- 11:46 I just couldn't-- 11:48 I just couldn't do it anymore. 11:49 So at last and that was kind of-- 11:52 That was when I was just earning, 11:55 again trying straight up the story. 11:56 It's all right. 11:57 But at that point I did felt like okay I have-- 12:01 I have to go to my mom 12:02 and again and they were there for me through that. 12:06 I ended up moving-- 12:08 I ended up going to jail one day. 12:11 What took you to jail? 12:13 Because I-- Not being out the-- 12:14 But I said I was in but it really wasn't in 12:18 and because I can't say you had but I was doing. 12:20 In my mind I knew I was done. 12:22 With him? With him. 12:23 I said I was done 12:24 but it wasn't that easy to get him out. 12:26 So while we were going through court process and things 12:28 he just wouldn't leave. 12:30 So we ended up getting into another physical altercation 12:34 and when the police came I was viewed at-- 12:39 Because I was defending myself 12:41 I was viewed as a aggressor and I went to jail. 12:44 They arrested you? They arrested me. 12:46 So that's the problem with these laws. 12:48 The person who has the most marks 12:50 or whatever tend end up being the one to say well, 12:53 she did this to me. 12:54 Was the place where you stay was still in your name? 12:57 Yes. 12:58 And yet they took you to jail 13:00 because he was not on the lease or the-- 13:03 But they knew that he lived there so they-- 13:07 It was recently at the other situation 13:10 but the police said they just had to, 13:12 they had to make arrest and take me. 13:13 They had to take one person to jail? 13:15 Yeah. But it was a blessing though. 13:17 It was a blessing because I went to jail 13:18 and I met a girl who was abu-- 13:22 Who addicted to crack I believe 13:27 and I watched her going through these drugs and I did not, 13:31 I never knew that I was as bad of as I was. 13:33 I thought I was still okay because I was better than-- 13:36 You know, I just addicted still at the place that I was. 13:40 And when I saw that young lady we were of the same age 13:43 and I was only like 20 then and I'm like, 13:46 that could be me. 13:48 Like surely that could be me 13:49 and she was going to prison for murder. 13:51 And I'm like, if I don't stop that's going to be me. 13:55 And I called my mom and I said mom, I'm done. 13:59 I have to do something different 14:00 and I wanted to go to back to college. 14:02 So I went back to college but and I went through college 14:05 and I got my masters degree 14:07 and I still would dibble and dabble 14:09 in different things 14:10 but because I was doing a little bit on the right path 14:13 like I was walking on two roads, 14:14 I guess I would say. 14:16 I was on two roads, 14:17 on one way I was doing all these things 14:18 I was supposed to do but I really wasn't, 14:22 really wasn't committed to be in a-- 14:24 Be in a different person. 14:26 And recently I decided I said, there is something, 14:29 there is something missing. 14:31 I have everything, you know, I have a house, 14:33 I have a car and my daughter. 14:35 I kept my daughter in church even when I didn't go, 14:37 I never went but I was in her. 14:40 And I said, well, what is wrong? 14:42 And my mom just say 14:43 I'm just gonna keep praying for your relation, 14:45 I'm just gonna keep praying for you. 14:47 I met a old high school friend, 14:49 somebody that was my friend when I was young like 12, 14:52 and I started seeing him and his family 14:55 and the way that they worshipped, 14:57 and the way that they felt about God and I was-- 15:00 I really had never experienced that. 15:02 I had been in charge of my life and I knew what I believed in 15:06 and I knew completely like our doctrine 15:10 and things like that 15:11 but I had never really felt a personal relationship. 15:15 Relation with God? With God ever. 15:16 And outpouring of His Holy Spirit on you to be alive? 15:18 Yes. Yes. 15:19 I never, I never do that and I knew, 15:21 I believed Him and I had faith in Him 15:24 and I knew that He had brought me through some 15:26 very, very challenging things because I knew, 15:29 because I knew about God. 15:30 Let me stop you right there, and I interrupt you. 15:32 When we talk about a relationship with God 15:37 it means as if you are in that 15:41 personal state of mind with him. 15:43 I was told once that when you read the Word of God 15:46 you are in the mind of God because you are studying 15:48 what He is guiding you or in your steps. 15:51 But we are so tuned into 15:54 a religion versus a relationship 15:57 and you were looking for that relationship. 16:00 Yes. Okay. 16:01 I needed that relationship. You wanted that relationship? 16:03 Yes, I needed relationship and I did not know 16:07 how to get it and I wasn't sure 16:10 but I started with a 40 days fast and pray. 16:14 Did you? 16:15 And I dated with people who weren't Adventist 16:18 but you know, 16:19 because I was just seeing other people and I'm like, 16:21 you got as much as the Lord has done for me 16:23 because I was clear about that. 16:25 There is no way you can go from being, 16:27 tenth grade somebody beating you 16:29 when you are a child really literally, 16:32 expelled from school to having a masters degree 16:34 within less than three, that doesn't happen. 16:37 So there had to be nothing but God, right? 16:40 So I knew that but I didn't really understand 16:43 well, why don't I have that feeling about God? 16:46 When I see people like moved, I want to, why don't I feel it? 16:50 So I started with the 40 day fast and prayer and I just, 16:55 I just took the time to get to know Him, 16:57 just for myself and He opened my eyes to 17:02 so many things. 17:03 Praise God. 17:04 And I have just changed in so many different ways 17:09 and every little thing that He puts in my step 17:12 so I go into the women's retreat, 17:14 you know, the girls retreat. 17:15 The girls retreat. 17:16 And learning about being a vitreous woman 17:19 and being a private study woman and I just-- 17:22 I feel like, some days I feel like 17:24 how did I not know all these stuff? 17:26 And it's like I knew it? 17:28 You know, I have read that stuff before 17:30 but it's very different when you take it 17:32 and you can talk to Him like He is your, 17:36 He is your friend. 17:37 He is my Father, He is my man, 17:39 He is everything now and it just, 17:41 it has changed my life so much. 17:44 Now, okay, now you jumped ahead. 17:45 Oh, no. 17:46 That's all, no, no, no, no, 17:47 you have mentioned a masters degree. 17:49 So you had your child, you went to jail, 17:52 you get out the situation with this man, 17:55 now how do we get to your college-- 17:57 The situation went the man, that's that during I want it. 18:01 You want to know what happened? Yeah. 18:02 I removed him right up out of my life. 18:04 Okay. 18:05 We-- 18:06 He ended up, he is in prison. 18:08 He's been in prison for the past six or seven years 18:12 and not because of he did serve jail time 18:15 because of our situation 18:17 but because of the things that he was doing to me 18:20 even just without me being knowing it 18:24 he is incarcerated for it. 18:25 And we don't know when he is getting out. 18:28 Things that was directed towards you. 18:31 He went to jail for things that were directed 18:33 towards me but other things he did to other women, 18:38 I mean, he's just an abuser, 18:39 just all the way around and I think that's what-- 18:44 And now he is praying the price. 18:46 So and tell us about your daughter 18:48 and her relationship with him? 18:50 It is not. 18:51 She really loves her father a lot 18:54 and they really had a good-- 18:56 They had a really good bond when she was young. 18:59 So she really doesn't understand the dynamics 19:02 of being in a abusive relationship 19:04 because I can't tell her. 19:06 Yeah, he was great to me too at first. 19:08 He made me feel like 19:09 I was the only person in the world 19:11 but once I didn't want to do-- 19:14 If I didn't fit exactly what he wanted me to do 19:16 at that moment he could not take it. 19:18 And so, I mean, 19:19 he may have started to do that to my daughter 19:22 when she got of age. 19:23 Who knows but I know the Lord removed him 19:26 from her life and because she was struggling with. 19:29 She loves it, 19:30 she wants to be with her dad 19:31 but now that he is gone she is able to kind of-- 19:35 I mean, she deals with it 19:36 but she is able to keep going without feeling like, 19:39 you know-- 19:41 Whether she write to him or talk to him? 19:43 She used to, not anymore. 19:44 No communication at all? 19:46 All right, so now going back to 19:48 where did the bachelors degree, masters degree come in? 19:52 The day I left from jail I literally that day 19:55 I went to the community college and enrolled 19:58 and complete in associates degree 20:00 and it was a program lets you to go straight 20:01 to the university and I went straight 20:04 and got in five years and did not stop. 20:06 What community college? I had a goal. 20:08 It was Washtenaw Community College. 20:09 You went to Washtenaw? He went to Washtenaw. 20:10 Oh, really. 20:11 Washtenaw Community College is in the area 20:14 outside of Michigan in one of the-- 20:15 Ypsilanti. 20:16 Ypsilanti area, you know. And your degree is? 20:20 In social work. I knew that. 20:22 Social work, social work, all right. 20:24 Yes. Yes. 20:25 Because I had a goal that 20:26 I wanted to finish my masters degree 20:29 before my daughter went to first grade. 20:31 And you did it? And I did it. 20:33 Isn't that wonderful? 20:34 So now are you dating now, you know, 20:37 what's going on now personally? 20:39 Well, now I'm-- 20:41 Because of all of these things 20:42 and not having a relationship with God 20:45 even when I met someone that I probably could have 20:47 a really possibly relationship with them we try, 20:50 I didn't know how to have a relationship. 20:53 So right now I'm continuing 20:54 into build my relationship with Christ 20:56 so that I can be the woman 20:58 that you are supposed to be towards the end. 21:00 How important is that-- 21:01 I tell women, who say, Dr. Kim, 21:04 what did you do while you are waiting on the Lord 21:07 to bless you with Arthur and truly he is a blessing. 21:10 I said, I worked on me. 21:12 I worked on who I am, what I wanted to do, 21:15 went back to school got another degree, 21:18 got involved with the church 21:19 because you are involved with the church now. 21:22 You are back at that church where you ran from. 21:25 Isn't that something? Yes, I'm. 21:26 You are very involved. 21:27 And I will say that to, 21:28 I think that's another thing that helped me 21:30 get involved with churches. 21:32 One year they asked me to-- 21:34 I heard you think about 21:35 you are the nominating committee. 21:36 One year someone asked me to be on a committee 21:39 and I was like me? 21:41 Me? You want me on the committee? 21:43 But they asked me to and I did it and I served 21:46 and it made me become closer to my church family. 21:49 So they want-- 21:50 I had so once I started to build that relationship 21:53 that I had never really knew I could have 21:56 and then having a relationship with God. 21:58 Now I can be the church member that I'm supposed to be. 22:01 So now they are coming, 22:02 they want to me three different positions. 22:05 Where much is given much is required. 22:08 Absolutely. 22:09 You didn't say the church, what church? 22:10 I'm from Ypsilanti Seventh-day Adventist. 22:12 Okay. Seventh-day? 22:14 Oh, yes. 22:15 Now when we talk about nominating committee 22:16 for those who are-- 22:18 Some of our viewers 22:19 who are not Seventh-day Adventists 22:20 we meet every two years 22:22 and we have body of the church to come together 22:25 to select the officers of the church. 22:27 That's called the nominating committee. 22:29 You know, you and your daughter, 22:31 you know, we got about five minutes left. 22:32 You and your daughter, 22:33 tell us about your relationship. 22:37 It has gotten a lot better in the last year. 22:41 Initially I knew I need to be provider, 22:43 that's what I was taught, you be a provider, 22:45 you put things in place. 22:47 But I did not realize the importance of having 22:49 a intimate relationship with your child. 22:52 And I was more be in the responsible party 22:56 the kind of thing. 22:58 This is what you need the delegate to say. 22:59 You need to do this, you need to do that. 23:01 But now I understand that she just needs me to be there 23:04 for her to have that person that she feels like 23:06 she can come to no matter what she does, 23:09 no matter what mistake she has that I'm gonna be there for her 23:12 every step of the way. 23:14 And Lexus-- 23:15 Wait a minute, and Lexus, 23:17 who goes around comes around, is she you all the very again? 23:21 But she is a little bit more than me I think. 23:24 When people are telling me now that 23:26 she is just like me but I'm not-- 23:28 I was-- 23:29 Never like that. 23:31 Yeah, that's about they are so. 23:32 But she is a very, she is very outspoken. 23:34 I love that about her. 23:35 She is aggressive, she speaks her mind. 23:38 Every forum that I have been in with Lexus 23:41 she will stand up, 23:42 she is not gonna wait on the crowd. 23:44 This is how I feel, 23:45 this is the way I look at something. 23:46 She is going to be that leader of our next generation. 23:50 I'll see that. 23:51 Let me ask you a question about you 23:54 not having a relationship with your father. 23:57 How did that really upset you as you were, 23:59 you know, growing up and maturing? 24:01 I thought it didn't but now to this date like 24:04 now I realize that it makes me not really understand 24:08 how to have a relationship with the man 24:10 and to not know that you should expect a man 24:14 to treat you like he treats the church 24:17 and to love you in that manner. 24:19 So I would just accept anything and now I know that now 24:25 and if you can't give me that love 24:27 or if you are not gonna treat me in that way 24:29 then there is really no room for you in my life. 24:32 Okay. Amen. 24:34 And with we have about three minutes to go. 24:36 Okay. Okay. 24:37 Another thing that I was interested in, 24:40 you know, how would you encourage your daughter, 24:44 you know, being that she doesn't have a relationship 24:46 with her father, you know at this point? 24:49 What would be an encouragement to her 24:52 and do to-- 24:53 What would you do? 24:54 I'm trying to help her understand 24:57 that she can have a relationship with God 25:00 and help her understand 25:02 how God's word can apply to everyday life, 25:05 the issue she is dealing with right now. 25:07 When I was younger I read Bible verses 25:09 but I don't feel like I ever understood 25:11 how it could apply right then, so I couldn't internalize it. 25:15 So I'm trying to help her do that 25:17 and then I try to make sure that 25:18 she doesn't have identify people 25:22 that are going to be there for her, 25:24 that she know she can go to if she needs to. 25:26 Man, do I have believe our Christian man. 25:30 She has people in her life that are there for her. 25:33 She can call them and they are there for whatever 25:36 and we have that type arrangement. 25:38 And it doesn't always work as you may heard her say, 25:42 "I don't want other people tell me what to do. 25:44 I miss my dad." 25:45 But you know, 25:47 that's what I do in the mean time. 25:48 What-- 25:50 One final question is 25:51 and I know we don't have a lot of time. 25:53 But your mother asked you to leave 25:58 when you didn't respond to her. 26:01 How would you handle that situation with your daughter? 26:04 I have told her that the only way 26:07 she is leaving me is through death. 26:09 Okay. 26:11 And that sure say 26:12 because I want her to know that 26:14 she always has me 26:16 and that's what I feel like parents. 26:17 And I think my mom would have chosen 26:18 a different route if she had the choice now. 26:21 But I feel as parents we have to emulate God. 26:23 God never leaves me, 26:25 I can't ever leave you 26:27 and that's just the bottom line. 26:28 And I tell that in a way you dealt 26:29 with each other again on other side 26:32 but as I have to be what God is to me here. 26:36 He doesn't leave me. 26:37 He has never left me one step of this way 26:40 through this whole journey I've been on. 26:42 While I was doing everything wrong, 26:44 He never ever left me. 26:46 So I can't leave her either. 26:47 So what's your job in social work? 26:50 Right now I'm an instructor at Eastern Michigan University 26:55 and I also I'm a field unit director 26:57 so I supervise social work. 26:58 Okay. Okay. That is so vivid. 27:00 You know how God orders your steps 27:03 and I know that your family is very proud of you. 27:06 Praise God. And we are proud of you. 27:08 You know, I thank God for being God in your life 27:11 and as you grow in your relationship. 27:12 Let me ask final question. 27:15 Your mom, I know she is proud of you. 27:17 Yes, she is. 27:18 She is extremely proud of me and my accomplishments 27:20 and the things that I do with my daughter 27:22 but we talked there other day and what she shared is that, 27:26 she is most proud of my relationship with Christ 27:29 and how I've grown as a woman in God 27:32 and that's what she is most proud of. 27:34 Praise God. 27:36 Well, we are proud of you 27:37 and you continue to do the work you are doing to help 27:39 so many people to help them. 27:41 Just stay on the path and God has ordered your steps. 27:45 God bless you. Thank you. 27:46 I want you to know as parents 27:47 we can never give upon your children, 27:49 on our children. 27:50 Don't ever think is too late for God 27:53 to turn your life around. 27:55 I'm Dr. Kim Logan-Nowlin. 27:56 And I'm Arthur Nowlin. 27:58 God bless. |
Revised 2015-05-11