Welcome to
Marriage In God's Hands.
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I'm Alanzo Smith
and here with me is my
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precious wife, June Smith.
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June, say
"welcome" to the folks.
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It is my joy.
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Welcome to
Marriage In God's Hands.
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And today we are
going to talk about,
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deception and envy.
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As a matter of fact, in
our previous presentation,
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we spoke about deception.
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So we want to focus on the
envy aspect, the envy section
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of our presentation.
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But we're still on the story
of Jacob, Rachel, and Leah.
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We said it started out
on a note of deception,
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and as a result,
it's down hill from there.
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We also gave you folks a caution
that you should never enter into
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a relationship
based on deception.
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As the Bible says, "Be not
deceived; God is not mocked.
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For whatsoever a man soweth,
that shall he also reap. "
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When Rachel realized that
she could not have children
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and that her sister
Leah was having children,
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and especially sons,
she envied her sister.
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Let's talk about the notion, the
concept of not having children;
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childlessness in marriage.
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Because that is a
reality that confronts
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a lot of families today.
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It is said about 14%
of couples who get married
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will not have children.
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And unfortunately,
many of them don't know that
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before they get married
for a variety of reasons.
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Infertility problems
can be a very difficult
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construct in marriages.
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And many people are
facing that problem today.
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That is very sad and we want
to really reach into the hearts
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of families and individuals
who are experiencing this.
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We want to say to the
husband if it's your wife
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who can't give birth to a
child, be caring, be empathetic,
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be understanding, avoid pressure
from your relatives and friends,
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and bring your best self.
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When you took that vow
to marry this woman that you
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love so much, it was
for better or for worse.
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Unfortunately, if it seems as
if there might not be a child,
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you just have to
love her just the same and
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make her feel special.
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Do that for her.
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And the same
thing is true for men.
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It is not always that the woman
can't have children in marriage.
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Sometimes it is the man or the
situation rests with the man,
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or the husband.
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And so if that's the situation,
then a wife needs to be
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understanding, a wife
needs to be sensitive,
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a wife needs to be
nurturing and caring and love
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him just the same.
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Marriage is not all
about having children.
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In fact, marriage is
about loving each other
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for better or for worse.
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And love
transcends everything else.
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Now June, what I
would like you to do for me,
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we spoke to the husband
and we spoke to the wife,
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but I think there's a
large body out there that
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we need to talk to, and
that body is the church.
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Because the church does
play an important role in the
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lives and functions of families,
especially young families.
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And how should the
church relate to a young couple,
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or to any couple for
that matter, who is childless?
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You know, the
title of this program is,
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Marriage In God's Hands.
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And the church tends
to be very family focused
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so that when we organize
our services, we tend to
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provide a forum for families.
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And rightly so.
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But that should not be
at the exclusion of couples
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who are childless.
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Because here you have a number
of families in your congregation
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who are not able to
have children, yet your focus
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is on the family;
the role of the family,
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the role of
parenting, the role of...
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So we're saying
then, be sensitive.
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So when you have mother's day,
father's day, children's day;
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we're not saying
you're not to have them.
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You are to have these programs.
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And, yes, you are
to plan them well.
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But we're saying, be sensitive.
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For example, you can
have a program of inclusion
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so the wives that are
in your congregation that
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have no children, rather than
having them sitting in the pew
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while you call the
mother's to come up, invite them
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to come as well.
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Let them come up,
give them a bouquet.
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Whatever you're giving
those mother's, give them too.
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And let them know that they
are spiritual mother's in Israel
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and that these boys and
girls that are in the church,
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it's their job to help nurture
them and to care for them.
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So we're talking about
a ministry of inclusion.
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It actually says, it takes
a village to raise a child.
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So those mother's without
children can play a great role
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in nurturing young children.
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In fact, we encourage couples
to bond with families who
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have children, if you have none,
and get to learn or to share
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in the responsibility of
nurturing those children.
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So that you sometimes can help
these couples who have children
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to provide child care or
to provide good babysitting
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arrangements if they have to
go some place as a couple, etc.
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You can provide a
ministry that has a great value
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to the congregation.
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So we don't want you
to feel less of a couple
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if you don't have children.
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You are still special,
you are still wonderful,
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and you have a great ministry
to offer to other families
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and to other children.
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Don't be a recluse,
don't withdraw to yourself.
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Love children and give your
best, present your best self
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to other children.
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And be a
mother, and be a father;
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spiritual mother
and spiritual father.
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Of course, there's always
adoption, there's always...
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Other variables
that they can choose.
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Now the passage we're
looking at, the story that
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we're looking at, it
says that Rachel envied Leah
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because she had children,
she gave children to Jacob,
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and she could not.
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Now here we're talking
about the concept of envy.
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Now Rachel envied her sister.
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Little did she know that
her sister is jealous of her.
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Because Leah knows that
Jacob's love was toward Rachel.
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So we have this
symbiotic confusion.
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Rachel envies Leah and
Leah is envying Rachel.
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It's a dog and bone syndrome.
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You know, I heard the
story of some thieves who,
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well actually, these
were thieves that were very
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defiant, as it were.
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So they drove up into the
front of the house and they
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picked the lock and
started taking out this woman's
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expensive Persian carpet
and they were loading them
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onto the van.
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The next door neighbor saw
them taking out the carpet and
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asked, "What are you
doing with those carpets?"
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And they said,
"Oh, we are cleaners.
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We are taking
them to the cleaners. "
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And the lady said,
"Well, would you be willing
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to do that for me too?
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Would you clean mine?"
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And they said, "Sure. "
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So when they were through
with this house, they went
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over to the neighbor and
took out all of her expensive
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Persian carpet and went away.
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What was happening
here was that this neighbor
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was technically envying what
the other neighbor was doing.
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And she wanted to
keep up with her neighbor.
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And we see the result
of what envy is all about.
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So envy is never a good thing.
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And envy creates
toxicity in a relationship.
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So you don't want to
envy what others have
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or even envy your own family
members because you don't know
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what their circumstances are.
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Because here in the story,
Rachel was hurting herself
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by envying the relationship
that Leah had, and vice versa.
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And that was just not
healthful for either of them.
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And envy leads to
malicious feelings.
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Envy leads to jealousy.
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When you envy someone, you
now become jealous of them.
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And jealousy is a dangerous
thing when people start
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becoming jealous
of another person.
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So here we find,
now, jealousy has set in.
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Now how might we
avoid being envious?
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Well you know, first of
all I think you have to accept
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yourself for who you
are, and you have to accept
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what you have and learn to
be satisfied with what you have
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and live within your means.
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So if this is what
God has blessed you with,
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see yourself as God's child and
this is what He has given you.
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Accept it, be happy
with it, and move on.
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And what God has
blessed the other person with,
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because God blesses all
of us, but in different ways.
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So if God gives you five
talents and gives me one talent,
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as we have that
story in the Bible,
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rather than me being
envious of your five talents,
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use my one talent to
the honor and glory of God.
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And that leads us to the
point where we want to say,
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learn to celebrate
the success of others.
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The reality is, there
will always be people who
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have more than you.
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And your role is to use
your gifts to God's glory
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and be happy for
other people's gifts.
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Now people who are
envious will hate you.
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They will hate
you for what you have.
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They will sometime
try to destroy you,
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as we spoke
about jealousy before.
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Now if you know of someone who
is jealous of another person,
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or if you know of
someone who is jealous of you
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or hates you or these negative
things that we're talking about,
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what do we do?
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Do you reciprocate?
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Do we give them back hate,
do we give them back anger?
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Do we sabotage
them, do we malice them?
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Do we lie on them?
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The things that envious people
do, do we return it in kind?
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No we shouldn't.
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As Christians we should
do just what the Bible says;
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love those who hate us.
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Treat those with
these traits with respect,
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and hopefully we can heap
coals of fire on their head
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and, who knows, win
them to the glory of God.
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Envy is something that
is toxic to the human soul
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and the human spirit.
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We have too many
families where people are not
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satisfied with what they have
and what they have accomplished.
00:11:55.99\00:12:00.22
What their children can
do and what their neighbor or
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their friend or
someone else's children can do,
00:12:06.39\00:12:09.11
they become envious.
00:12:09.14\00:12:10.57
And sometimes you
have a situation where this
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rivalry starts, where
you start pushing your child;
00:12:13.37\00:12:16.29
pushing your child beyond
boundary to be like that child
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and "Why can't you
be like that child?"
00:12:19.37\00:12:21.68
Is that healthy
to the relationship,
00:12:21.71\00:12:24.01
especially for the children?
00:12:24.04\00:12:25.43
That is not healthy.
00:12:25.46\00:12:26.44
You don't want to
compete with anyone else.
00:12:26.47\00:12:29.06
Compete with yourself to
maximize your own strengths
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and work to improve
your own limitations.
00:12:31.85\00:12:34.19
But never envy anyone else
because that is not of God.
00:12:34.22\00:12:38.17
But it's important for us
to look at Rachel's experience.
00:12:38.20\00:12:41.47
Here was Rachel envying
Leah for what she thought
00:12:41.50\00:12:45.73
Leah was able to
do; have children.
00:12:45.76\00:12:48.19
And she, pretty much, bothered
God to give her this blessing.
00:12:48.22\00:12:52.90
What would you say
was the outcome of that?
00:12:52.93\00:12:55.14
You know, we will talk
about that in our next section
00:12:55.15\00:12:59.43
because that's
what we want to go into;
00:12:59.46\00:13:01.75
the outcome of envy.
00:13:02.72\00:13:05.02
We're saying to you folks,
do not be envious of anyone.
00:13:05.05\00:13:10.09
Accept what God has given you.
00:13:10.12\00:13:12.39
Be satisfied, appreciate
your children for who they are.
00:13:12.42\00:13:16.85
Love them, care for
them, make them feel special,
00:13:16.88\00:13:20.66
and don't push them
to become someone else.
00:13:20.69\00:13:22.93
Because frankly
speaking, they are not.
00:13:22.96\00:13:25.48
Envy and deception are dangerous
characteristics to possess.
00:13:25.51\00:13:30.02
We'll be right back.
00:13:30.05\00:13:31.14
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Welcome back to
Marriage In God's Hands.
00:14:09.83\00:14:12.76
We've been talking
about deception and envy.
00:14:12.79\00:14:16.79
And we chronicled the
story of Rachel, Jacob, and Leah
00:14:16.82\00:14:22.67
and talked about how
those concepts were played out
00:14:22.68\00:14:27.22
in their family.
00:14:27.25\00:14:28.41
Now it is obvious that
Rachel was also not happy.
00:14:28.42\00:14:35.25
So she kept pressuring
her husband because she had
00:14:35.28\00:14:41.33
no children, it's a childless
marriage, her sister is
00:14:41.36\00:14:44.77
having children for her husband,
her sister's handmaid is having
00:14:44.80\00:14:48.83
children for her husband, but
nothing is happening her way.
00:14:48.86\00:14:52.28
So Jacob got angry now.
00:14:52.31\00:14:55.18
And Jacob says, "Am I
God? Why are you asking me?
00:14:55.21\00:14:58.59
Am I the one who caused
you not to have children?
00:14:58.62\00:15:00.96
Why are you upset with me?"
00:15:00.99\00:15:02.22
So Jacob got very
angry with Rachel.
00:15:02.25\00:15:06.46
My question here is, is
Jacob's anger justified?
00:15:06.49\00:15:12.52
Now he might have
felt pressured by his wife,
00:15:12.55\00:15:15.54
the wife might have
been fussing with him a lot
00:15:15.55\00:15:18.64
because she had not
been able to get pregnant.
00:15:18.67\00:15:22.04
So he got annoyed, he got upset.
00:15:22.07\00:15:23.68
Was the justified?
00:15:23.71\00:15:25.09
I think it was very
insensitive of Jacob.
00:15:25.12\00:15:28.22
Jacob was in a
situation where he was dealing
00:15:28.25\00:15:32.35
with his own pain.
00:15:32.39\00:15:34.49
Because clearly he was
deceived by his father-in-law.
00:15:34.52\00:15:38.26
But the reality is, here
was his wife caught in a bind.
00:15:38.33\00:15:43.36
And she was complaining
because she felt desperate
00:15:43.39\00:15:46.41
to do what she thought
was the thing to do then
00:15:46.44\00:15:49.43
which was to have a
child for her husband,
00:15:49.46\00:15:51.58
especially to have a son.
00:15:51.61\00:15:53.45
And so she was
complaining, she was whining,
00:15:53.48\00:15:56.86
and it might have been a
little overbearing for him.
00:15:56.89\00:15:59.53
But he needed to be
sensitive to her pain.
00:15:59.56\00:16:02.04
Are you saying that this is also
true for the society at large,
00:16:02.99\00:16:07.69
for individuals when we
need to empathize a little more,
00:16:07.72\00:16:12.14
when one family member is
hurting and is going through
00:16:12.17\00:16:16.12
their own pain or their
situation, rather than saying,
00:16:16.15\00:16:18.82
"Well, snap out of
it, get out of it. "
00:16:18.83\00:16:20.95
There comes a time when you
might have to say to the person,
00:16:20.98\00:16:23.64
"Snap out of it," but it should
not come before we empathize
00:16:23.67\00:16:28.11
and we help to restore
and to rebuild that individual
00:16:28.12\00:16:31.12
and what they're going through.
00:16:31.15\00:16:32.54
So yes, I agree with you
that Jacob should have been
00:16:32.57\00:16:35.24
a little more sensitive,
especially because of the
00:16:35.27\00:16:38.40
situation and how
painful and stressful it was.
00:16:38.41\00:16:41.55
So Rachel is not happy.
00:16:41.58\00:16:45.73
Okay, she's not
happy in this situation.
00:16:45.76\00:16:47.81
So look what Rachel did.
00:16:47.84\00:16:49.78
She offered her
handmaid to Jacob and says,
00:16:49.81\00:16:55.33
"Okay, have
children with my handmaid. "
00:16:55.36\00:16:58.26
Because she's thinking
in herself, "If my handmaid
00:16:58.27\00:17:01.51
should have children for
my husband, he will be happy
00:17:01.54\00:17:04.53
with me and that will
make the marriage work. "
00:17:04.56\00:17:06.51
Again, we go back to
the deception and that
00:17:06.54\00:17:09.70
does not work at all.
00:17:09.73\00:17:11.30
Her perception of what happiness
meant was clearly warped.
00:17:12.15\00:17:16.16
And it reminds me of the notion
of the demise that many families
00:17:16.19\00:17:22.24
are experiencing
because they're barking up the
00:17:22.27\00:17:25.38
wrong tree for happiness.
00:17:25.39\00:17:27.78
Obviously,
happiness comes from within.
00:17:27.81\00:17:30.67
Happiness comes from
finding meaning in yourself
00:17:30.70\00:17:33.93
and your
relationship with Christ.
00:17:33.96\00:17:35.60
And no husband, no wife, no
child can bring you happiness,
00:17:35.63\00:17:40.08
as is reflected in this scenario
with Jacob and his two wives.
00:17:40.11\00:17:44.23
So she did what her sister
did, what she saw her sister do.
00:17:45.38\00:17:49.83
We call this, multi-generational
transactional patterns
00:17:50.23\00:17:56.60
of behavior where dysfunction
in one family can translate
00:17:56.63\00:18:02.46
into the other family.
00:18:02.49\00:18:03.80
Talk to us about
this; individuals carrying
00:18:03.83\00:18:07.02
dysfunctional
patterns of behavior into their
00:18:07.05\00:18:10.19
family from families of
origin, and how this can
00:18:10.22\00:18:13.50
impact, whether negative
or positive, the relationship.
00:18:13.53\00:18:17.01
If there's a family in the
Bible that clearly outlines and
00:18:17.04\00:18:21.39
explains how multi-generational
transactional patterns
00:18:21.42\00:18:25.53
get socialized in
families, it's this family.
00:18:25.56\00:18:28.46
Jacob was the son of a
deceptive couple as well.
00:18:28.49\00:18:33.36
Well, his mother was charged
with probably causing one of the
00:18:33.39\00:18:37.40
greatest deceptions where
she had deceived his father
00:18:37.43\00:18:41.19
into getting him the
birthright that was due
00:18:41.22\00:18:44.18
to his brother, Esau.
00:18:44.21\00:18:45.46
And look how this played
out in the generations hence.
00:18:45.49\00:18:48.45
Sarah had this great
scheme and got her husband
00:18:48.48\00:18:54.17
to bless Jacob.
00:18:54.20\00:18:55.56
And here was Jacob who...
00:18:55.59\00:18:56.82
Rebecca.
00:18:56.85\00:18:57.94
I'm sorry, Rebecca.
00:18:57.97\00:18:59.38
And here was Jacob who, because
of his mother, Rebecca's act,
00:18:59.41\00:19:04.90
had to run away from home
and landed in this place where
00:19:04.93\00:19:08.07
his Uncle Laban was,
and the deception continued.
00:19:08.10\00:19:11.32
So families who impose
deception, it gets perpetuated.
00:19:11.35\00:19:18.02
Pointed justice,
we sometimes call it?
00:19:18.05\00:19:19.72
It's unfortunate that
children end up with this scar,
00:19:19.75\00:19:23.90
but that is
usually what happens.
00:19:23.93\00:19:25.94
I would like to take a
little time out to speak to
00:19:25.95\00:19:28.81
our audience and you who
have been listening to us
00:19:28.84\00:19:32.00
because sometimes you
take into your relationship
00:19:32.03\00:19:36.66
what we call, baggage's.
00:19:36.69\00:19:38.92
You take into your
relationship things that
00:19:38.95\00:19:41.54
are hurting your relationships.
00:19:41.57\00:19:43.14
Sometimes it's what you
saw your grandfather do,
00:19:43.17\00:19:47.26
or what your father
did, and you accept it.
00:19:47.29\00:19:49.82
You are socialized to believe
that this is how it is and
00:19:49.85\00:19:52.95
this is how it should be.
00:19:52.98\00:19:54.48
And you tell yourself, "Well,
my father wouldn't allow this,"
00:19:54.51\00:19:57.41
or "My grandfather would not. "
00:19:57.44\00:19:59.70
And the same thing with
the ladies, with you ladies.
00:19:59.73\00:20:02.42
You bring things in
that you saw your grandmother
00:20:02.45\00:20:05.30
or your mother do.
00:20:05.33\00:20:06.33
So here you are in your nuclear
family and what is happening
00:20:06.36\00:20:10.63
is that you have brought
in some things that are toxic
00:20:10.66\00:20:13.36
to the relationship and they
are hurting your relationship.
00:20:13.39\00:20:16.66
And you have to examine yourself
and say, "How might we change?
00:20:16.67\00:20:20.95
How might we inject in this
relationship something better
00:20:20.98\00:20:25.65
than that which my parents
had or my grandparents had?"
00:20:25.68\00:20:29.58
Bringing in baggage into
the relationship can cause
00:20:29.61\00:20:33.40
the relationship to suffer.
00:20:33.43\00:20:35.62
And the story we're
talking about, if we look in
00:20:35.65\00:20:39.05
that generation, we saw
that it came back from even the
00:20:39.08\00:20:42.37
generation before Isaac.
00:20:42.40\00:20:43.89
Because his own father, Abraham,
had deceived or tried to
00:20:43.92\00:20:49.14
pass off his wife as his sister.
00:20:49.17\00:20:51.97
So here we have all these lines
of deception that eventually
00:20:52.00\00:20:55.56
got manifested in Rachel's life.
00:20:55.59\00:20:59.86
So we have two desperate
wives, two desperate women,
00:20:59.89\00:21:05.75
trying to please their husband.
00:21:05.78\00:21:09.35
Desperation is a
cruel task master.
00:21:09.38\00:21:13.62
And a woman or a man should
never find himself or herself
00:21:13.65\00:21:19.17
to a point where
they become desperate.
00:21:19.20\00:21:22.58
That's important for
us to say and keep saying.
00:21:22.61\00:21:26.44
Because desperate
women will go after a man,
00:21:26.47\00:21:31.26
desperate men will go after
a woman, regardless of the fact
00:21:31.29\00:21:35.84
that they are married.
00:21:35.87\00:21:36.84
It's like, "I don't care. "
00:21:36.85\00:21:38.16
"I want him, I don't care. "
00:21:38.19\00:21:40.17
One woman calculatedly
planned to take away
00:21:40.18\00:21:45.78
this woman's husband.
00:21:45.81\00:21:48.49
And she had no qualms about it.
00:21:48.52\00:21:52.45
She put it in her head that
this is what she's going to do.
00:21:52.48\00:21:55.17
She's desperate and she's going
to bring about a resolution
00:21:55.20\00:21:58.23
to her desperation.
00:21:58.26\00:21:59.64
So she took him away.
00:21:59.65\00:22:02.47
It is a very sad thing that
frequently happens in families
00:22:02.50\00:22:05.71
where the price or the
consequence to the behavior
00:22:05.74\00:22:10.20
is not what's looked
at, but it's the desire
00:22:10.23\00:22:14.40
of the desperate person.
00:22:14.43\00:22:16.16
And as was displayed in
this relationship with both
00:22:16.19\00:22:19.61
Rachel and Leah, nobody won.
00:22:19.64\00:22:22.56
This was a family
that had a very sad ending
00:22:22.59\00:22:25.65
because people were
just very indiscreet and were
00:22:25.68\00:22:29.52
selfish in the way they went
about the things they wanted.
00:22:29.55\00:22:33.42
While you cannot blame
Rachel totally for what she did,
00:22:33.45\00:22:40.12
understanding her desperation,
there should be a limit,
00:22:40.15\00:22:44.64
however, as to how far
an individual will go to
00:22:44.67\00:22:49.06
quench that desperation.
00:22:49.07\00:22:50.79
There should be a limit as
to what an individual will do.
00:22:50.82\00:22:54.82
Each of you listening
should have a bar, and it
00:22:54.85\00:22:58.29
should be a moral bar,
it should be an ethical bar,
00:22:58.30\00:23:03.67
it should be a
spiritual bar, where you sit.
00:23:03.71\00:23:08.07
One that God will
approve and can approve.
00:23:08.10\00:23:11.78
One that operates
within human dignity.
00:23:11.81\00:23:15.26
That you say to yourself, "I
will not fall below this bar.
00:23:15.27\00:23:19.90
I will not compromise values and
principles to the extent that
00:23:19.93\00:23:24.21
I have to come below this bar. "
00:23:24.24\00:23:26.89
You have to set it for yourself.
00:23:26.92\00:23:28.66
You can't ask
someone to do it for you.
00:23:28.69\00:23:31.10
You have to set this
high standard for yourself.
00:23:31.13\00:23:35.17
Because society is eroding and
we see the bar is getting lower,
00:23:35.20\00:23:40.85
and lower, and lower.
00:23:40.88\00:23:42.73
And we're appealing to you.
00:23:42.76\00:23:44.04
We want you to
keep that standard high.
00:23:44.07\00:23:46.31
That's what God will
require of His children.
00:23:46.34\00:23:49.16
Now what stories can we learn
or what lessons can we learn
00:23:49.19\00:23:53.92
from Rachel's story?
00:23:53.95\00:23:55.20
Well first of all,
don't lose your dignity.
00:23:55.23\00:24:00.53
Maintain your cool,
maintain your dignity,
00:24:02.14\00:24:05.86
under all circumstances.
00:24:05.89\00:24:08.02
Rachel lost her cool because,
you know, she became desperate.
00:24:08.05\00:24:13.48
And the same thing with Leah.
00:24:13.51\00:24:15.24
So we're saying to you,
maintain your composure.
00:24:15.27\00:24:19.88
Be yourself and
learn to trust God.
00:24:19.91\00:24:22.42
Isn't it amazing that the
thing that she wanted the most
00:24:22.45\00:24:26.45
literally took her life?
00:24:26.48\00:24:28.72
Yeah, as a matter of
fact, she said to her husband,
00:24:28.73\00:24:33.54
"Give me
children or else I die. "
00:24:33.57\00:24:39.18
That was her
prayer, that was her plea.
00:24:39.21\00:24:41.96
So she fasted, she
prayed, and she begged God,
00:24:41.99\00:24:45.20
"Give me children. "
00:24:45.23\00:24:46.38
And so God answered her prayer.
00:24:46.81\00:24:48.73
She conceived and
she had her first child.
00:24:48.76\00:24:51.49
And she conceived again
and she had her second child.
00:24:51.50\00:24:54.77
But guess what.
00:24:54.80\00:24:56.04
She died in childbirth.
00:24:56.07\00:24:58.82
Isn't that something?
00:24:58.85\00:24:59.91
But that's a lesson
for us modern Israel.
00:24:59.94\00:25:02.29
That's a lesson for us today.
00:25:02.32\00:25:03.83
There are sometimes
things happening in our lives
00:25:03.86\00:25:06.35
and we just can't
see around the bend.
00:25:06.38\00:25:08.80
But as the song says, we
have got to learn to trust
00:25:08.81\00:25:11.65
God's heart nevertheless.
00:25:11.68\00:25:13.09
What's tends to happen
in many relationships is,
00:25:13.12\00:25:15.52
the things that we want badly
and we have no control over,
00:25:15.55\00:25:20.38
we will do whatever it takes
to push God's hand, as it were.
00:25:20.41\00:25:24.14
But like Rachel,
God gave in, as it were.
00:25:24.17\00:25:27.57
Because sometimes
that's how He works.
00:25:27.60\00:25:29.21
But in the end, it might
not be to our best interest.
00:25:29.24\00:25:33.97
So whatever is the desire
of your heart, you should not
00:25:34.00\00:25:38.66
compromise spiritual
values to gain that desire,
00:25:38.69\00:25:42.68
you should not accept
abuse to gain that desire,
00:25:42.71\00:25:48.65
you should not settle
to shear your relationship
00:25:48.68\00:25:52.30
to gain that desire.
00:25:52.33\00:25:53.78
We're saying that God has
put a price on yourself, on you.
00:25:53.81\00:25:59.49
Who dare you to take it off.
00:25:59.52\00:26:01.42
You should maintain that price.
00:26:01.45\00:26:03.24
He paid for you with His life
and that makes you very special.
00:26:03.27\00:26:08.58
And regardless of what
your needs are and what the
00:26:08.61\00:26:11.60
defects are and what the
even tragedies in your life are,
00:26:11.63\00:26:15.90
the fact is, God will do for
you and will give you the things
00:26:15.93\00:26:20.87
that He knows will always
work in your best interest.
00:26:20.88\00:26:24.81
And if He withholds anything
from you, trust that it is also
00:26:24.84\00:26:29.14
in your best interest.
00:26:29.17\00:26:30.54
We have looked at the story
of Jacob, Rachel, and Leah.
00:26:30.57\00:26:37.06
And we have started
out by showing you how
00:26:37.09\00:26:40.22
Jacob's father-in-law
deceived him into marrying Leah.
00:26:40.25\00:26:45.18
And when he married
Leah, because of that deception
00:26:45.21\00:26:49.59
Leah had a difficult time.
00:26:49.62\00:26:52.03
She was not
loved, she was hated,
00:26:52.06\00:26:54.53
she was not
joined to her husband.
00:26:54.56\00:26:56.76
That woman literally suffered.
00:26:56.79\00:26:59.90
And by the time
Jacob, after working so hard,
00:26:59.93\00:27:02.89
by the time he got the
other wife, the one that he
00:27:02.92\00:27:05.81
really loved, still there
was pain in the relationship
00:27:05.84\00:27:10.05
and there was conflict.
00:27:10.08\00:27:11.44
Those two women were desperate.
00:27:11.47\00:27:14.24
Our message to
you, our counsel to you,
00:27:14.27\00:27:18.92
out instruction to you
is, don't get desperate.
00:27:18.95\00:27:23.17
Do not want anything that badly.
00:27:23.20\00:27:25.74
Do not want to get
married that badly.
00:27:25.77\00:27:27.92
Do not want to
have a child that badly.
00:27:27.95\00:27:30.60
Do not want to
get rich that badly.
00:27:30.63\00:27:32.80
Do not want a job or
a promotion that badly.
00:27:32.83\00:27:37.02
Do not want to be
recognized that badly.
00:27:37.05\00:27:39.99
That you will stop
at nothing to get it.
00:27:40.00\00:27:43.25
Learn to wait on God.
00:27:43.28\00:27:45.65
"Wait on the Lord
and be of good courage
00:27:45.68\00:27:48.68
and He shall
strengthen thine heart.
00:27:48.71\00:27:50.82
Wait, I say, on the Lord"
00:27:50.85\00:27:53.38
We have repeated this text
before and we'll continue to
00:27:53.41\00:27:56.28
repeat it because we believe
that in there lies the answer;
00:27:56.31\00:28:00.04
when you learn to wait on God.
00:28:00.07\00:28:02.07