Welcome to Marriage Heart to Heart! 00:00:34.79\00:00:36.50 We're Tom & Alane Waters with Restoration International 00:00:36.54\00:00:39.98 And we're excited to be together 00:00:40.31\00:00:42.65 to share another program on the principles 00:00:42.95\00:00:45.80 that can make your marriage heart to heart! 00:00:45.83\00:00:48.65 Today we're gonna be talking about managing money. 00:00:49.30\00:00:51.95 Now this can be a very sticky subject, 00:00:51.98\00:00:54.12 a very uncomfortable subject for many couples. 00:00:54.16\00:00:56.60 But we found in our marriage 00:00:56.94\00:00:58.20 that as we learned to manage our money, that means budget 00:00:58.24\00:01:01.13 we have found the joy that it's brought in 00:01:01.42\00:01:03.22 our own marriage. 00:01:03.25\00:01:04.22 So we hope you have your paper and pencil 00:01:04.23\00:01:05.89 because we're gonna be doing some budgeting today 00:01:05.93\00:01:08.05 on this program. 00:01:08.08\00:01:09.25 Well, whether we have a lot of money 00:01:10.38\00:01:11.96 or a little money 00:01:12.31\00:01:13.28 managing money is crucial 00:01:14.21\00:01:16.94 to reducing the financial stresses 00:01:17.53\00:01:20.23 that can happen in marriage. 00:01:20.26\00:01:21.92 So that's what we wanna talk about today 00:01:22.71\00:01:24.62 and Luke 16:2 says that we need to: 00:01:24.65\00:01:26.87 "give an account of thy stewardship;" 00:01:26.91\00:01:29.12 So how do we give an account of our stewardship? 00:01:30.10\00:01:32.01 What does that mean in simple terms today? 00:01:32.04\00:01:34.19 We have to know where we spend the money. 00:01:34.78\00:01:36.40 How much we have and where it goes? 00:01:36.43\00:01:38.52 That's right! And so, sometimes 00:01:38.89\00:01:40.62 we have to look at what our lifestyle is, 00:01:41.24\00:01:43.99 what we are trying to accomplish in life financially 00:01:44.76\00:01:47.99 and some of those dreams that we may have 00:01:48.55\00:01:51.35 have to bee looked at in accordance with the means 00:01:51.66\00:01:54.55 that we have! 00:01:54.58\00:01:55.98 Because many times is easy to 00:01:56.30\00:01:58.13 let the ideas, the dreams 00:01:58.52\00:02:00.54 the credit cards take us outside 00:02:00.58\00:02:03.14 of the means and we can't afford to do that 00:02:03.52\00:02:05.89 if we're going to be faithful to take account of our stewardship. 00:02:05.93\00:02:08.85 Every principle that God has given us in His Word 00:02:10.04\00:02:12.75 only is there to make us happier! 00:02:12.78\00:02:14.66 - That's right! - And if we're willing to take 00:02:14.70\00:02:16.57 these principles into our lives we find that our lives 00:02:16.61\00:02:19.68 are happier, especially as married couples! 00:02:19.71\00:02:21.99 We don't have those unnecessary stresses. 00:02:22.35\00:02:25.03 And I remember when we had set that goal 00:02:25.18\00:02:27.82 of buying our first home 00:02:27.85\00:02:29.45 newly married, saving money, saving money, 00:02:29.95\00:02:33.02 we were both working full-time in our professional 00:02:33.06\00:02:35.71 careers 00:02:36.17\00:02:37.20 and we had looked forward to getting our first home. 00:02:37.24\00:02:41.11 And I remember the day we drove over and we signed 00:02:41.38\00:02:43.84 on that contract. 00:02:43.87\00:02:44.95 We just got ourselves into debt for the first time 00:02:45.32\00:02:48.31 in our marriage! - Yes! And 00:02:48.34\00:02:50.16 unfortunately they had figured our incomes 00:02:51.34\00:02:55.00 in however they do that in qualifying us and 00:02:55.34\00:02:58.26 we needed both of our incomes to 00:02:58.29\00:03:01.78 make ends meet. 00:03:02.11\00:03:03.43 That's what they told us! They took our total income 00:03:03.47\00:03:06.01 from both of us work and said: "This is how much 00:03:06.49\00:03:08.14 you can afford, in the kind of home that you purchase, 00:03:08.18\00:03:10.74 you know, this is your level to go to. " 00:03:10.77\00:03:12.60 And that's where we went! 00:03:13.57\00:03:14.89 And then what have we found out just a few weeks later? 00:03:14.93\00:03:17.65 That our first child was well on her way! 00:03:18.28\00:03:21.20 That was a little bit intimidating. 00:03:21.76\00:03:23.08 And I think realtor was the first one 00:03:23.12\00:03:24.37 to know the news that we were gonna have a baby! 00:03:24.41\00:03:26.21 What are we gonna do now? We've already signed 00:03:26.43\00:03:27.89 down the dotted line. 00:03:27.92\00:03:28.95 No escape! 00:03:29.32\00:03:30.53 We'd already made another commitment that 00:03:31.30\00:03:33.08 was ahead of this commitment and that was that you're 00:03:33.12\00:03:35.13 going to pull back from your employment 00:03:35.16\00:03:38.07 when we had our first little one. 00:03:38.10\00:03:40.65 So, where does that put us financially? 00:03:41.03\00:03:42.84 That puts us down to 00:03:43.15\00:03:44.89 a home that was bought on two incomes 00:03:45.85\00:03:47.76 with one income to pay the bills. 00:03:47.79\00:03:49.67 Ok! So kind of 00:03:50.23\00:03:51.44 forced us to relook at making account of our stewardship. 00:03:52.04\00:03:56.51 It did! Because we 00:03:57.15\00:03:58.58 we thought we were pretty careful. 00:03:58.94\00:04:01.55 And we were good savers to get our down payment 00:04:01.59\00:04:04.32 for that first home but it was quite a struggle 00:04:04.36\00:04:07.48 at the beginning to have that mortgage payment. 00:04:07.52\00:04:10.61 And we only had one full-time income. 00:04:10.98\00:04:12.91 That's right! It also brought us into a temptation 00:04:12.95\00:04:16.31 to 00:04:16.68\00:04:17.65 kind of look at whether we wanted to continue to 00:04:18.33\00:04:20.41 put God first in everything. 00:04:20.44\00:04:23.19 Now it was no question 00:04:23.50\00:04:25.24 that we would continue to pay our tithe, 00:04:25.55\00:04:27.76 but you the little bit of struggle we went through. 00:04:27.80\00:04:30.21 Whether we were going to continue to give 00:04:30.97\00:04:33.21 our offerings on the same commitment that 00:04:33.56\00:04:35.82 we'd given to the Lord. 00:04:35.85\00:04:36.97 And I'm thankful to say that 00:04:37.60\00:04:38.97 we really put God to the test! 00:04:39.34\00:04:41.61 He says: "Prove me!", we talked about that in 00:04:41.65\00:04:43.82 one of our other programs: "Prove me 00:04:43.85\00:04:45.84 herewith, saith the Lord" 00:04:46.06\00:04:47.67 and we did prove Him because we believe that 00:04:47.84\00:04:50.07 He had shown us over and over that 00:04:50.10\00:04:52.01 if we trust Him, He will make things work together for good. 00:04:52.05\00:04:55.52 So, we did not go back on our commitment to the Lord 00:04:55.55\00:04:59.71 and that's been over 25 years and 00:05:00.30\00:05:03.50 we're thankful for that! 00:05:03.73\00:05:04.85 And He's never let us down! - That's right! 00:05:04.89\00:05:07.40 And that's been an encouragement to me! 00:05:07.78\00:05:09.92 But, you know, we had our second child 00:05:10.48\00:05:11.97 and that only adds more expenses here. 00:05:12.38\00:05:14.29 Your life doesn't get less expensive to live, 00:05:14.32\00:05:16.79 every day, that you know, 00:05:16.82\00:05:18.14 the economy increases, you know, the 00:05:18.18\00:05:20.75 it's just, inflation is there! And so, 00:05:20.91\00:05:23.73 when you add children, your life becomes 00:05:23.76\00:05:26.55 more financially complicated. 00:05:26.86\00:05:29.15 That's right! 00:05:29.50\00:05:30.47 Well, about that time 00:05:30.79\00:05:32.33 you probably remember that this big financial 00:05:32.45\00:05:35.82 investment councilor came to the hospital 00:05:36.32\00:05:38.22 and we had a big leadership meeting. 00:05:38.88\00:05:42.02 All the leadership personnel in the hospital 00:05:42.06\00:05:44.67 came together and we had this seminar and 00:05:44.70\00:05:47.28 on investing and annuities. 00:05:47.92\00:05:50.15 And each of the leadership people 00:05:51.19\00:05:52.93 had the opportunity to meet with this 00:05:53.22\00:05:55.35 councilor personally. 00:05:55.38\00:05:56.99 Well, we had our meeting together and 00:05:57.24\00:05:59.50 you remember me coming home that day. 00:05:59.53\00:06:01.76 This man said to me: 00:06:02.83\00:06:05.01 "You need to be able to save at least 00:06:06.28\00:06:08.88 25 dollars every pay period. " 00:06:09.58\00:06:12.16 And I said: "Listen, you don't understand our circumstances! 00:06:13.12\00:06:15.82 I mean, we" 00:06:15.85\00:06:17.82 And I share a little bit with him of our circumstances. 00:06:17.99\00:06:20.47 I said: "You know, we're good money managers, 00:06:20.50\00:06:22.40 but we can't afford to save even 25 dollars! 00:06:22.43\00:06:25.60 We're just, that's how tight we are, 00:06:25.63\00:06:28.07 you know, running our budget!" 00:06:28.10\00:06:29.53 - Pay period to pay period! - That's right! 00:06:29.57\00:06:31.65 And 00:06:31.68\00:06:32.85 I didn't really like what he said to me but 00:06:33.28\00:06:35.41 he turned to me and he said: 00:06:35.80\00:06:38.14 "If you can't save 25 dollars a pay period 00:06:38.56\00:06:42.47 then you have a serious problem!" 00:06:43.11\00:06:45.77 Now, 00:06:46.76\00:06:48.17 I mean, I felt this 00:06:48.62\00:06:50.07 self coming up inside of me, 00:06:50.19\00:06:51.65 I didn't, 00:06:51.68\00:06:52.70 I didn't, you know, respond to him then, 00:06:53.06\00:06:54.85 I didn't understand some of the things we 00:06:54.88\00:06:56.64 certainly understand today! 00:06:56.67\00:06:58.07 But you remember when I came home and shared that with you? 00:06:58.41\00:07:00.80 Yes! I had some of that same self reaction in me! 00:07:01.12\00:07:03.70 Because for the most part I was managing 00:07:04.03\00:07:06.23 the money in the home! 00:07:06.26\00:07:07.42 - That's right! - I mean, you know, you 00:07:07.46\00:07:08.43 bring your paycheck home, and I worked, you know, 00:07:08.44\00:07:09.87 on a very part-time basis 00:07:09.90\00:07:11.72 but my income was very insignificant according to our 00:07:12.01\00:07:15.43 our living demands on us. 00:07:15.46\00:07:17.97 And 00:07:18.29\00:07:19.26 so when you said that to me that night I 00:07:19.77\00:07:21.89 thought: 00:07:21.92\00:07:22.96 "This is, he doesn't know, I mean, we bought this home 00:07:23.67\00:07:26.76 when we had two full-time incomes 00:07:26.79\00:07:28.96 and I'm hardly even working a day a week!" 00:07:29.00\00:07:30.90 So you didn't like it either did you? 00:07:32.12\00:07:33.37 I didn't like it! 00:07:33.40\00:07:34.37 Neither one of us liked it! 00:07:34.42\00:07:35.57 But, it kind of challenged us in a way! 00:07:35.90\00:07:37.98 And so, 00:07:38.73\00:07:39.84 we went back 00:07:40.16\00:07:41.73 we relooked at our financial situation 00:07:42.06\00:07:44.18 and we really couldn't see how we could do it! 00:07:44.22\00:07:45.98 But here's the reason we use this illustration 00:07:46.60\00:07:49.20 we started looking closer 00:07:49.81\00:07:52.71 and we started taking account of the money, 00:07:52.75\00:07:55.79 taking account of our stewardship. 00:07:56.27\00:07:57.92 And you know, we challenged ourselves 00:07:58.24\00:08:01.10 that we were going to save 25 dollars 00:08:01.13\00:08:03.96 every pay period. 00:08:04.29\00:08:05.43 And you know, that proved to be a huge blessing to us 00:08:05.89\00:08:08.14 when we moved to our country home in Montana. 00:08:08.17\00:08:11.57 Yes! It provided us the means to live 00:08:12.20\00:08:14.56 when we made that transition 00:08:14.59\00:08:16.38 because you went from full-time employment 00:08:16.60\00:08:19.01 and a leadership position in a hospital 00:08:19.05\00:08:21.43 to getting a commission only 00:08:21.46\00:08:23.70 in your real estate practice which the first year 00:08:23.74\00:08:25.91 was extremely meager! 00:08:25.94\00:08:27.60 - That's right! - Way below poverty rates 00:08:27.64\00:08:29.78 in the country! 00:08:29.81\00:08:30.78 And so we lived on that savings 00:08:31.05\00:08:33.40 because we ere willing to be challenged that way. 00:08:33.44\00:08:36.17 And, you know, what you hear today may 00:08:36.20\00:08:38.43 step on your toes, you may feel challenged 00:08:38.46\00:08:40.50 it may make you uncomfortable, it may even 00:08:40.53\00:08:42.94 want to make the "me" in you raise up! 00:08:42.97\00:08:45.35 But, 00:08:45.66\00:08:46.63 we only share with you what we have challenged 00:08:47.11\00:08:49.69 and been challenged with ourselves and 00:08:49.72\00:08:51.97 you will see that somewhere down the road 00:08:52.14\00:08:54.12 it will be a blessing to you 00:08:54.15\00:08:55.90 if you will, in your managing of your money 00:08:56.07\00:08:59.59 have a little savings, because no one knows 00:08:59.98\00:09:02.57 what is ahead and what your circumstances may mean. 00:09:02.61\00:09:05.88 And I think that the part that's the so meaningful 00:09:06.33\00:09:09.17 for us, especially as we looked back at it, 00:09:09.20\00:09:11.65 is that 00:09:12.25\00:09:13.22 when we take that 25 dollars 00:09:13.23\00:09:16.38 it seems insignificant, even back then 00:09:17.30\00:09:19.77 over 20 years ago it seemed insignificant, 00:09:19.81\00:09:22.25 we take that 25 dollars 00:09:22.41\00:09:24.84 and if we hadn't just had the 00:09:24.88\00:09:27.41 money taken out of our paycheck 00:09:27.45\00:09:29.95 we never saw it. 00:09:29.98\00:09:30.96 And we never missed it! 00:09:31.26\00:09:32.89 And what that said to us, 00:09:34.51\00:09:35.73 and I think that what it says to you 00:09:35.76\00:09:37.40 is that if we will have a simple savings program 00:09:37.44\00:09:41.27 that we won't really miss that money! 00:09:42.75\00:09:44.66 And a lot of times people spend more than that 00:09:44.70\00:09:47.38 in two weeks and they can't even account for where it went 00:09:47.42\00:09:50.66 just nickel and dimming here and there! 00:09:50.69\00:09:52.50 So, make the commitment 00:09:52.98\00:09:54.97 to tighten the belt on things. 00:09:55.32\00:09:57.39 Look at your lifestyle, evaluate your spending 00:09:57.42\00:10:00.88 look at your dreams and really ask the question: 00:10:01.21\00:10:04.18 "Am I living within my means?" 00:10:04.50\00:10:07.55 "Or am I forcing myself into a position where 00:10:07.62\00:10:10.09 I have to make more money and feel the pressure?" 00:10:10.13\00:10:12.57 And so for us, we began to actually make a budget. 00:10:13.41\00:10:17.62 Because we knew we had this much coming in 00:10:17.73\00:10:19.80 and we had to look at how those dollars were gonna be spent, 00:10:20.39\00:10:23.83 where are they gonna go; 00:10:23.98\00:10:24.95 to make sure we had enough to cover our bills! 00:10:24.96\00:10:27.43 And we sat down with a paper and pencil 00:10:27.66\00:10:29.66 very early on and we started penciling it out: 00:10:29.86\00:10:32.98 "Ok, we have our tithe, our first for the Lord, 00:10:33.01\00:10:36.06 we have our offering and we have our mortgage payment!" 00:10:36.10\00:10:39.11 And we put that down on paper. 00:10:39.73\00:10:41.42 A sort of absolutes! 00:10:41.45\00:10:42.74 Absolutes! 00:10:42.77\00:10:43.81 You know, and this sounds 00:10:43.95\00:10:45.17 maybe a little bit simplistic 00:10:45.47\00:10:47.46 to you but we have found over and over again 00:10:47.78\00:10:50.31 as we have talked to so many couples 00:10:50.34\00:10:53.48 that many times 00:10:54.10\00:10:56.08 if the money is there, the money just goes away! 00:10:56.12\00:10:59.09 I know I talked to one man and he was 00:10:59.74\00:11:02.58 he was just bemoaning 00:11:03.22\00:11:04.88 the fact that if he could make fifty thousand dollars a year, 00:11:05.03\00:11:08.66 this was back when I was in my real estate practice and 00:11:09.04\00:11:12.19 he said: "If I could just make fifty thousand dollars a year 00:11:12.77\00:11:15.35 then I could really get buying life!" 00:11:15.69\00:11:18.74 And 00:11:18.90\00:11:20.22 I knew the way that he was spending money 00:11:20.25\00:11:23.08 and the philosophy that he had, 00:11:23.11\00:11:24.57 tat even though making fifty thousand dollars 00:11:24.90\00:11:27.33 at that time for him 00:11:27.36\00:11:29.08 would be increasing his income considerably 00:11:29.12\00:11:32.93 that the reality of it was that 00:11:33.39\00:11:35.14 it wouldn't change the fact that he'd still 00:11:35.18\00:11:37.02 be running out of money. 00:11:37.05\00:11:38.04 And within a couple of years he was making that 00:11:38.68\00:11:42.00 more than fifty thousand dollars 00:11:42.03\00:11:43.94 and none of his circumstances had changed! 00:11:44.12\00:11:46.46 None of his spending habits had changed and his family was 00:11:46.86\00:11:50.40 still in the same financial difficulties! 00:11:50.43\00:11:52.35 So, the issue here is not how much money we have 00:11:52.66\00:11:55.68 it's how we manage and how take account of that money! 00:11:56.32\00:11:59.64 So, as simplistic as it may sound 00:11:59.67\00:12:01.61 to sit down with a peace of paper 00:12:01.64\00:12:03.55 and start writing down you will be surprised 00:12:03.84\00:12:07.08 when you write down all the known monthly expenses! 00:12:07.27\00:12:10.60 You take that net that you have after taxes 00:12:10.91\00:12:14.08 you put that to the top of your paper 00:12:14.37\00:12:16.00 and then you begin to write down all the known expenses 00:12:16.27\00:12:18.46 and really dig into it, 00:12:18.49\00:12:19.89 dig them all out, go to all your resources 00:12:20.18\00:12:23.59 and they're gonna be surprised 00:12:23.75\00:12:24.99 at what they come up with at the bottom line. 00:12:25.18\00:12:27.24 The blessing of this and how it worked in our marriage 00:12:27.90\00:12:31.08 is that once we did that 00:12:31.55\00:12:33.50 we said: "Oh? 00:12:33.59\00:12:35.27 This is how much money we really have to work with!" 00:12:35.31\00:12:39.24 This has to include our savings and this has to include 00:12:39.55\00:12:43.59 our unexpected necessary expenses, 00:12:43.89\00:12:48.22 some of those unknown things! 00:12:48.36\00:12:50.03 And so, now you have a different picture! 00:12:50.38\00:12:52.56 We got a totally different picture in our minds 00:12:52.60\00:12:54.78 about what we had to really work with! 00:12:55.10\00:12:57.13 And that's one of the blessings 00:12:57.43\00:12:58.95 that sitting down with a peace of paper 00:12:58.99\00:13:00.68 or you can do it on your computer with a spreadsheet, 00:13:00.72\00:13:03.65 but to com up with a bottom line. 00:13:03.68\00:13:05.19 That's right! So maybe we should talk about those 00:13:05.40\00:13:07.95 known expenses, because in talking with many couples 00:13:07.99\00:13:10.51 who have had financial stress in their marriage 00:13:10.54\00:13:13.07 they don't even know what those real known expenses are! 00:13:13.11\00:13:16.09 - That's right! - They don't 00:13:16.12\00:13:17.52 take account of them 00:13:17.55\00:13:18.81 because they don't necessarily show up every month. 00:13:18.85\00:13:21.44 So maybe we should identify 00:13:21.47\00:13:23.06 these known expenses! - That's right! That's good! 00:13:23.10\00:13:25.19 Well, we talked about the tithe, the offerings, 00:13:26.36\00:13:28.74 the mortgage, 00:13:28.77\00:13:30.24 the car payment, the insurance these are things 00:13:30.41\00:13:33.13 that are known expenses! But 00:13:33.16\00:13:34.59 let's take the car insurance for example. 00:13:34.63\00:13:36.89 For us and I don't know how it is for you, 00:13:37.53\00:13:39.88 but our car insurance comes due every six month. 00:13:39.92\00:13:43.25 So, what are we gonna do? 00:13:43.98\00:13:45.58 One of the problems that people run into 00:13:46.30\00:13:48.06 and we used to run into this problem, is we 00:13:48.09\00:13:50.19 think about our paycheck and we think about the net 00:13:50.22\00:13:52.67 that we have to work with 00:13:52.70\00:13:54.39 and so, here we are in Wal-Mart or some store 00:13:54.66\00:13:58.53 and we see something that: 00:13:58.56\00:14:00.38 "Wow, this is really great! I need this!" 00:14:00.42\00:14:03.02 And what can happen is we can look at our check book 00:14:03.99\00:14:06.66 or we can look at how much money we have 00:14:06.69\00:14:09.29 presently with us, 00:14:09.56\00:14:10.80 we can end up buying that, maybe it's a camping tent or 00:14:11.19\00:14:14.84 you know, it's a new exercise treadmill or something like that 00:14:15.41\00:14:18.81 we got the money for it, 00:14:19.13\00:14:20.19 but because we haven't taken account 00:14:20.77\00:14:23.87 we haven't looked at 00:14:24.22\00:14:25.38 the fact that that six month 00:14:25.71\00:14:28.49 insurance bill needs be reconciled 00:14:29.11\00:14:32.22 and accounted for every month. 00:14:32.25\00:14:33.91 So a peace of that it's coming out every month. 00:14:33.95\00:14:36.21 What many people end up doing 00:14:36.53\00:14:38.09 is they come to the insurance bill, the bill comes in the mail 00:14:38.13\00:14:41.36 and they go: "Oh no! " 00:14:41.39\00:14:43.74 "When am I gonna get that six hundred dollars? " 00:14:43.78\00:14:45.82 or whatever it is 00:14:45.85\00:14:46.87 because they just went out 00:14:47.81\00:14:48.83 and bought the tent two month ago, not thinking 00:14:48.87\00:14:52.40 that part of that money should have already been set aside 00:14:53.29\00:14:56.79 for that insurance payment. 00:14:57.44\00:14:58.68 And the other thing that the problem we have today 00:15:00.24\00:15:02.92 is the credit card, that peace of plastic 00:15:03.18\00:15:05.72 that has made everything so convenient! 00:15:05.75\00:15:08.26 And what it's made the most convenient is go on to debt! 00:15:08.87\00:15:11.07 That's right! 00:15:11.10\00:15:12.07 And cause stress and marriage fallen apart because 00:15:12.08\00:15:15.39 people can't, they just, 00:15:15.67\00:15:17.13 they're in fights and arguments and blame and guilt 00:15:17.17\00:15:20.32 and so it just - They can't even keep up 00:15:20.62\00:15:22.18 hardly with the interest on the 00:15:22.21\00:15:24.32 the card. - That's right! 00:15:25.00\00:15:26.50 So, what we chose to do 00:15:26.80\00:15:28.52 is to write down these real expenses 00:15:28.94\00:15:33.59 that we know, and in six month we're gonna have 00:15:33.63\00:15:35.77 our insurance payment on the car, 00:15:35.80\00:15:38.04 on our home. 00:15:38.35\00:15:39.32 Some people have medical policies or life insurance 00:15:39.51\00:15:42.59 all of these are expenses - That's right! 00:15:42.62\00:15:44.29 that need to be budgeted in every month 00:15:44.32\00:15:46.12 and those funds need to be set aside 00:15:46.15\00:15:47.88 so when those big bills show up in the mail 00:15:47.92\00:15:51.07 there's the money to pay them off. 00:15:51.10\00:15:53.65 And then there's the utilities! 00:15:53.76\00:15:55.49 Which you can get a pretty good idea 00:15:55.53\00:15:56.94 what that's gonna be on a monthly basis. 00:15:56.98\00:15:58.89 And many of the utility companies today 00:15:58.92\00:16:00.80 let you do a year plan. 00:16:01.12\00:16:02.99 So if you have higher heating cost in the winter 00:16:03.03\00:16:05.92 and it's lower in the summer, you can pay the 00:16:06.23\00:16:08.71 same amount every year and they can estimate your 00:16:08.74\00:16:11.19 your monthly bills on that. - That's right! 00:16:11.22\00:16:13.71 So it can be a fairly well known expense. 00:16:13.75\00:16:16.21 And so you've got your phone bills, 00:16:16.24\00:16:18.85 your heating bills, your electricity, gas, 00:16:19.75\00:16:23.15 you know, sewer, whether, all those things 00:16:23.18\00:16:25.47 that have to be incorporated into that budget. 00:16:25.51\00:16:27.90 There's a few other things that we wanna talk about, 00:16:28.67\00:16:30.86 but we need to take a break right now! 00:16:30.89\00:16:32.57 We hope you'll stay with us 00:16:32.60\00:16:33.80 as we talk about how we can truly manage our money. 00:16:34.38\00:16:38.20 There are many "How to?" books available, 00:16:43.71\00:16:45.44 but there's one that's free and perfect for every couple: 00:16:45.48\00:16:48.71 how you can "Build a Better Marriage". 00:16:48.74\00:16:51.14 Bible-based, matrimonial advice 00:16:51.76\00:16:53.75 is given in a lighthearted, easy-to-read manner, 00:16:53.79\00:16:56.32 for those contemplating marriage, 00:16:56.35\00:16:57.86 newlyweds, couples in their golden years, 00:16:57.90\00:17:00.82 and everyone in-between. 00:17:00.85\00:17:02.37 Simply call or write for your free copy 00:17:02.86\00:17:04.94 of this amazing little booklet, a handy little tool 00:17:04.98\00:17:07.79 to help build a better marriage. 00:17:07.82\00:17:09.67 Welcome back! We're talking about how we can really manage 00:17:15.65\00:17:19.38 our financial responsibilities. 00:17:19.84\00:17:22.05 We've been talking about budgeting 00:17:22.16\00:17:23.93 and the importance of that and we've talked of it in 00:17:24.29\00:17:26.61 very simplistic terms. You can take it 00:17:26.96\00:17:29.54 and put it on your spreadsheet on your computer or 00:17:29.58\00:17:32.24 the way we simply did it as take a peace of paper 00:17:32.51\00:17:34.82 and write the net amount after taxes and start working with 00:17:34.86\00:17:37.67 the expenses that are known expenses 00:17:38.28\00:17:41.39 or just a couple of other ones that 00:17:41.78\00:17:43.65 kind of catch people from time to time. 00:17:44.24\00:17:46.23 And those are the taxes, the property taxes, 00:17:46.27\00:17:49.18 the things that, you know, don't come, you don't see them 00:17:49.22\00:17:52.58 every month. 00:17:52.73\00:17:53.95 And so, sometimes those can be set out of sight, 00:17:53.99\00:17:57.01 out of mind and then they pop-up and 00:17:57.04\00:17:59.33 they can be a pretty huge expense at one time. 00:17:59.37\00:18:01.68 That's right! 00:18:01.71\00:18:02.68 The other areas 00:18:02.69\00:18:03.66 are professional licenses - Yes! 00:18:03.67\00:18:05.29 for people who have to have continual education 00:18:05.58\00:18:07.87 or renew their licenses every year 00:18:07.90\00:18:09.81 or even their auto-licenses, 00:18:10.12\00:18:11.61 that you know the tags on the car. 00:18:11.65\00:18:13.64 They come once a year and "Bang!" all of a sudden we 00:18:14.00\00:18:16.49 owe 400 dollars to the state. 00:18:16.52\00:18:17.82 Where are we gonna get that 400 dollars? 00:18:17.86\00:18:20.24 - That's right! - So, by identifying those 00:18:20.27\00:18:22.62 known expenses and putting them out 00:18:22.65\00:18:25.09 and then budgeting every month, 00:18:25.12\00:18:26.73 maybe it's only 30 dollars for this or 40 dollars for that, 00:18:26.77\00:18:29.62 when that bill comes in we have the money. 00:18:29.75\00:18:32.21 - That's right! - And it's not 00:18:32.24\00:18:34.33 a pressure, it doesn't cause a reaction. 00:18:34.37\00:18:36.94 That's right! And one of the things that happens is: 00:18:36.98\00:18:39.70 if we're not really prepared for that when it comes in 00:18:40.01\00:18:42.93 we live in such a "debt orientated 00:18:42.96\00:18:45.45 leverage your money " kind of society 00:18:45.49\00:18:47.95 that the temptation then is to just, 00:18:48.27\00:18:51.51 you know, I'll put something on the credit card 00:18:51.89\00:18:54.19 so I can free up some money or I'll just, you know, 00:18:54.22\00:18:56.45 I'll take out a little loan, you know, just a signature loan. 00:18:56.49\00:19:00.22 It's easier or I could get a little bit of money here 00:19:00.25\00:19:02.66 with a little equity loan. 00:19:02.69\00:19:04.76 Those things had become so accessible! 00:19:05.12\00:19:07.11 But what they do if no habits change 00:19:07.56\00:19:10.73 if no account is made of our finances 00:19:10.77\00:19:13.91 then that cumulates, it keeps building up. 00:19:14.22\00:19:17.13 And there's maybe somebody out there listening 00:19:17.44\00:19:19.04 and says, you know: 00:19:19.07\00:19:20.11 "Well, it's not an issue for me! 00:19:20.15\00:19:21.92 I don't even have to think about 00:19:21.95\00:19:23.69 my bottom line! I've got all kinds of money!" 00:19:24.29\00:19:26.96 Ok? There are people like that that may be listening 00:19:27.12\00:19:29.80 and that's a blessing! Praise the Lord 00:19:30.03\00:19:32.33 that you have been blessed with those kinds of finances! 00:19:32.65\00:19:36.14 But you're still going to have to give an account 00:19:36.47\00:19:39.30 as a steward! So 00:19:39.64\00:19:41.66 whether you have plenty of money 00:19:41.74\00:19:43.23 and you forget about your tax bills until they come due 00:19:43.27\00:19:45.98 and the money is readily available 00:19:46.01\00:19:48.05 there's still an accountability to God 00:19:48.09\00:19:50.06 for the blessing that He's given to each one of us 00:19:50.10\00:19:52.48 in the funds that we manage! 00:19:52.51\00:19:54.67 So, maybe you can have the inducement 00:19:55.03\00:19:57.93 to then be able to give more to the Lord's cause 00:19:58.23\00:20:01.58 if you're a good steward of those finances! 00:20:01.94\00:20:04.71 So we should look at some of those unknown expenses 00:20:05.84\00:20:08.45 like food. I mean we all know we need to eat! 00:20:08.74\00:20:11.07 We all like to eat! 00:20:11.10\00:20:12.26 But most people don't have a budget 00:20:12.60\00:20:15.22 "This is what I'm gonna spend 00:20:15.25\00:20:16.25 on food every month!" - That's right! 00:20:16.29\00:20:17.56 And going out to eat, and the pets that we have in our home 00:20:17.60\00:20:20.99 and the home maintenance needs to be done, and all the 00:20:21.02\00:20:23.31 miscellaneous things we need to buy to 00:20:23.34\00:20:25.84 keep our home up. You know, the toilet paper, 00:20:25.99\00:20:28.21 the paper towels, the Cleanixes, 00:20:28.24\00:20:29.83 all those little things! - Even gifts then 00:20:29.87\00:20:31.80 you know, what we're gonna spend on holidays and 00:20:31.84\00:20:34.42 birthdays and that adds up! - Stamps to mail things! 00:20:34.45\00:20:37.00 I mean it seems so insignificant! 00:20:37.03\00:20:39.40 But in reality it all adds up and it makes a huge difference! 00:20:39.89\00:20:44.50 That's right! 00:20:44.53\00:20:45.50 It makes a difference on that bottom line! 00:20:45.51\00:20:47.54 And it especially makes a difference because 00:20:48.01\00:20:50.78 we don't have the expectation! 00:20:51.12\00:20:53.27 We haven't sat down and had a budget. 00:20:53.31\00:20:55.29 So, it really makes an impact if we think we've got 00:20:55.33\00:20:59.42 "x" number of dollars 00:20:59.45\00:21:00.78 because we have a paycheck in our hand 00:21:00.82\00:21:02.75 and then all of a sudden we realized that not only 00:21:03.38\00:21:05.83 do we not have all that money we thought we did 00:21:05.86\00:21:08.28 after we go out and eat or we go out and buy these things. 00:21:08.31\00:21:11.28 When we find out that it's way less than we thought we had 00:21:11.71\00:21:15.62 and we need a large sum of money, that's where again 00:21:15.65\00:21:18.43 that the debt comes in. 00:21:18.46\00:21:19.91 So, we need to take these 00:21:20.76\00:21:22.62 undefined areas, the undefined amounts 00:21:23.37\00:21:26.39 and after having put our net amount 00:21:26.72\00:21:28.76 at the top of our budget 00:21:28.79\00:21:30.01 what we need to do next after we've identified 00:21:30.05\00:21:32.68 and put in the known expenses 00:21:32.71\00:21:35.05 we need to see how much money has left 00:21:35.09\00:21:36.63 and then divide it in these areas that are very real, 00:21:36.67\00:21:39.32 that we need from day to day to keep living. 00:21:39.35\00:21:41.59 And determine how much we're gonna spend in those areas. 00:21:41.91\00:21:45.37 - That's right! - And this has been 00:21:45.73\00:21:47.05 a tremendous help to us! I mean 00:21:47.09\00:21:48.38 there was a time we lived on 300 dollars a month! 00:21:48.73\00:21:51.56 And that was in the 80's. 00:21:51.73\00:21:53.18 So that's not a lot of money and it can't be done. 00:21:53.22\00:21:55.92 You know, - That was our transition time 00:21:56.73\00:21:58.10 from our suburban lifestyle 00:21:58.13\00:21:59.98 'cause we wanted to stay out of debt! 00:22:00.02\00:22:01.65 That's right! 00:22:01.68\00:22:02.65 That was something we agreed on, you know, 00:22:02.66\00:22:04.60 when we talked in the previous program about 00:22:04.95\00:22:07.12 agreeing together. - That's right! 00:22:07.41\00:22:09.38 That was one thing we wanted out of debt! 00:22:09.42\00:22:11.76 We didn't want that financial pressure on us! 00:22:11.79\00:22:14.10 So we were able to make that transition 00:22:14.28\00:22:16.31 without the debt. We never would've been able to do that 00:22:16.81\00:22:19.76 though if we had not agreed 00:22:19.79\00:22:21.77 to be accountable with our finances 00:22:21.81\00:22:23.81 and have a budget! 00:22:24.15\00:22:25.45 So we looked at everywhere those dollars would go. 00:22:25.81\00:22:28.60 And we didn't just drive around for something to do. 00:22:28.97\00:22:31.74 We only used the car if we had to go somewhere. 00:22:32.16\00:22:34.75 - Yes! - And, you know, 00:22:34.78\00:22:35.91 we were out in the country and I walked to the mailbox 00:22:35.94\00:22:38.17 a mile away instead of driving to the mailbox. 00:22:38.20\00:22:40.94 - Great exercise! - Yes it was good! 00:22:40.97\00:22:42.65 And, you know, we wouldn't 00:22:42.68\00:22:44.13 necessarily pick up our mail every day. I mean 00:22:44.17\00:22:45.82 these were areas that we address because we knew 00:22:46.34\00:22:49.68 that we didn't have those resources 00:22:50.04\00:22:51.75 and we didn't wanted to go into debt! 00:22:51.78\00:22:53.25 Well, it was a blessing too, because 00:22:53.28\00:22:54.72 we began buying bulk foods 00:22:54.75\00:22:57.35 you, know, we started buying things and 00:22:57.38\00:22:59.41 you know, a 50 pound bag or a 25 pound bag 00:22:59.61\00:23:02.69 and it was a huge savings! 00:23:02.72\00:23:05.28 And those kind of things, and we knew 00:23:05.41\00:23:07.96 when we went, you know, with you to go to the grocer store 00:23:08.11\00:23:10.64 or when we go to shop for something we had an idea 00:23:10.67\00:23:13.06 of exactly how much money we had to work with. 00:23:13.09\00:23:15.45 And so, our children never knew it 00:23:15.90\00:23:17.33 but during that period of our lives in that transition 00:23:17.37\00:23:20.35 we lived and ate pretty simply. 00:23:20.68\00:23:23.26 We bought, you bought 00:23:23.77\00:23:25.18 the vegetables and the fruits that were on sale, 00:23:25.22\00:23:27.80 not just what our taste liked. 00:23:27.83\00:23:29.82 And so, it was a good discipline for us 00:23:30.64\00:23:32.39 and it's really proved to be a blessing. 00:23:32.43\00:23:34.15 That's right! And cooking from scratch 00:23:34.35\00:23:36.21 that made a huge difference because of that bulk buy 00:23:36.25\00:23:38.04 of that I mean you can eat pretty cheap 00:23:38.08\00:23:40.05 if you, you know, heat a pot of beans! 00:23:40.08\00:23:41.75 - That's right! - Don't buy the beans 00:23:41.78\00:23:43.42 already done in the can! Buy them dry 00:23:43.45\00:23:45.49 and cook them and then eat them. 00:23:45.52\00:23:47.67 You know, and you can eat very inexpensively that way. 00:23:48.16\00:23:51.19 And those are some of the things we did, besides 00:23:51.22\00:23:53.32 looking at second hand things, 00:23:53.72\00:23:56.39 which also helped us to redeem 00:23:56.51\00:23:58.68 you know, and live within our means! 00:23:58.72\00:23:59.76 Because our means was - That's right! 00:23:59.79\00:24:00.80 very meager! 00:24:00.83\00:24:02.22 Rather than to get a plastic and go into debt 00:24:02.38\00:24:04.52 and have that constant pressure 00:24:04.55\00:24:05.89 because, you just don't ever get unburied. 00:24:05.93\00:24:08.45 It just gets bigger and bigger and bigger! 00:24:08.48\00:24:10.66 And it's very hard to get out of it! 00:24:10.98\00:24:13.22 That's right! 00:24:13.25\00:24:14.22 You remember that couple that actually called us 00:24:14.96\00:24:17.04 after we had done meetings, they called us and 00:24:17.08\00:24:19.13 wanted to see if we could come over 00:24:19.16\00:24:20.77 and help them 00:24:21.47\00:24:22.81 work through their budget. 00:24:22.93\00:24:24.49 It was really an interesting situation, 00:24:25.10\00:24:26.58 we've done this with people. 00:24:26.61\00:24:28.10 Well, they just didn't have any idea how to 00:24:28.62\00:24:31.12 how to go about this and really make it work. 00:24:31.29\00:24:33.75 And so, we actually sat down, we got out 00:24:33.78\00:24:36.01 a peace of paper and we just pulled together everything 00:24:36.05\00:24:39.88 all their financial information that they 00:24:39.91\00:24:42.63 could get their hands on. 00:24:42.66\00:24:43.79 These people had tried and tried different ways to 00:24:44.22\00:24:47.17 you know, to beat their debt! 00:24:47.20\00:24:48.65 And their paycheck always run out before 00:24:48.95\00:24:52.19 their bills were all paid. 00:24:52.22\00:24:53.54 And that night we sat down with them and 00:24:53.85\00:24:55.83 we went through this, we haven't gone 00:24:55.87\00:24:57.82 through all the details here, 00:24:57.85\00:24:59.29 we don't have time. But we went through 00:24:59.41\00:25:01.37 every detail with them! 00:25:01.40\00:25:03.56 And when we got to the bottom line 00:25:03.74\00:25:05.43 with their paycheck and their bills, we actually had 00:25:05.82\00:25:09.36 what was it? 300 dollars? - Yes! 00:25:09.71\00:25:11.55 Between 200 and 300 dollars 00:25:11.58\00:25:12.90 extra! - 200 or 300 dollars extra 00:25:12.94\00:25:14.44 that was unaccounted for! 00:25:14.47\00:25:15.95 And they found out, to their shock, 00:25:16.28\00:25:18.51 that they had just been letting this money 00:25:18.55\00:25:20.30 sleep through their fingers! - Yes! Every month 00:25:20.34\00:25:21.85 200 to 300 dollars was unaccountable! 00:25:21.88\00:25:24.11 - That's right! - You know it was just spent 00:25:24.15\00:25:25.31 a little here a little there, you know 00:25:25.34\00:25:26.51 quick fast foods, 00:25:26.54\00:25:27.84 I'll stop by Mc Donald's - That's right! 00:25:27.87\00:25:29.05 and I'll do this and I'll get this, you know. 00:25:29.09\00:25:31.51 And it was gone. 00:25:31.54\00:25:33.53 And so, we worked with them and we did all this 00:25:33.57\00:25:36.24 in just one evening together. 00:25:36.27\00:25:38.38 We worked with them and they called us 00:25:38.76\00:25:41.25 a few weeks later and they said: 00:25:41.28\00:25:43.23 "This is so amazing! 00:25:43.26\00:25:44.23 For the first time in our married life we 00:25:44.24\00:25:48.28 are living on a budget, 00:25:48.31\00:25:50.68 living within our means. 00:25:51.09\00:25:52.97 Not only are we paying all of the bills that we have to pay 00:25:53.31\00:25:56.80 but we have prioritized ", 'cause we kind of helped them 00:25:57.12\00:25:59.86 prioritize which debts they should be hitting 00:25:59.89\00:26:02.17 first to get rid of the higher interest rates. 00:26:02.21\00:26:04.46 They said: "We have prioritized all these things 00:26:04.77\00:26:06.88 and we actually have money to save 00:26:06.91\00:26:08.77 for the first time in our marriage! " 00:26:08.80\00:26:10.63 And not only that! 00:26:10.66\00:26:11.72 They talked about how much happier they were too! 00:26:11.76\00:26:13.91 - That's right! - Because so much 00:26:13.94\00:26:15.15 of their time was spent on the stress that the financial 00:26:15.19\00:26:18.41 burden was causing. - That's right! 00:26:18.44\00:26:19.78 I mean they were at each other, at each other 00:26:19.82\00:26:21.94 - Yes! blaming. And they had 00:26:21.97\00:26:24.06 that freedom. 00:26:24.09\00:26:25.43 So we wanna encourage you, 00:26:25.62\00:26:27.69 challenge you just as we've been challenged 00:26:28.48\00:26:31.09 to meet the responsibilities of taking account! 00:26:31.44\00:26:36.70 Be accountable as a steward 00:26:37.12\00:26:39.18 not only of the paycheck that you have 00:26:39.22\00:26:40.99 but realizing that God is the Giver of all these gifts 00:26:41.03\00:26:43.89 and we're His stewards! 00:26:43.92\00:26:45.65 So we wanna encourage you 00:26:45.80\00:26:46.99 to take account of your finances, 00:26:47.15\00:26:49.31 have a realistic budget that includes everything, 00:26:49.35\00:26:51.74 know what your means is 00:26:51.77\00:26:54.02 and know what your spending is 00:26:54.06\00:26:55.91 and encourage you to live within your means 00:26:55.95\00:26:58.13 and then begin to work diligently to reduce the debt! 00:26:58.54\00:27:02.51 And we can't do any of this apart from the Lord! 00:27:02.68\00:27:04.95 So I'd like to just close in prayer. Honey 00:27:04.98\00:27:06.90 do you wanna pray? - Sure. 00:27:06.93\00:27:08.71 Father in Heaven 00:27:10.08\00:27:11.65 thank You that You are the Giver of all things 00:27:11.82\00:27:13.89 and thank You that You will help us to learn 00:27:14.25\00:27:16.46 how to manage our money - Amen! 00:27:16.49\00:27:18.08 by Your principles! 00:27:18.11\00:27:19.56 And thank You for the joy that that can bring us! 00:27:19.77\00:27:22.21 So help us to be faithful stewards as we're praying 00:27:23.32\00:27:26.03 in Your Sun's name Amen! - Amen! 00:27:26.06\00:27:28.98 Well we look forward to having you join us again 00:27:30.49\00:27:32.61 as we talk about 00:27:33.03\00:27:34.80 From Discord to Harmony! 00:27:34.84\00:27:38.01 We want you 00:27:38.04\00:27:39.43 to experience a marriage that's heart to heart 00:27:39.92\00:27:42.85 with the Lord Jesus Christ! 00:27:43.44\00:27:45.55 Captions and translations by Christian Media Services www. 00:28:26.31\00:28:30.20