A promise
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to love
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in good times
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and bad
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for richer
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or poorer
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forsaking all others
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as long as
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you both shall live
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MARRIAGE In God's Hands
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Marriage Heart to
Heart with Tom & Alane Waters
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Welcome to
Marriage Heart to Heart
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We are Tom & Alane Waters
with Restoration International
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We hope you have your pencils
and paper ready because today
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we're gonna be talking
about Establishing our Roles
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in the Marriage!
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You know, this is something
that I guess we would call it
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a "hot topic"
because there's been
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a real misunderstanding
in erosion a way of the roles
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not just
women's roles today, but
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the real place that God
designed for man to take.
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So, we want to begin
right back at the beginning
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with what God has showed us
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the best way for man and wife.
So if you have your Bibles,
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turns with us today to Genesis.
We're gonna be looking at
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Genesis the second
chapter in the 18 verse:
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"And the LORD God said, It
is not good that man should
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be alone; I will
make him an help meet. "
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A qualified, suitable helper.
I put that in parenthesis.
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That's what a help meet is.
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So, when God created man and
women, He created them equal.
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Because women was
taken from man's side.
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That meant: she was not to
rule over him, to be above him
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or not to be below him, to
be stepped on or walked on.
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That's what God designed in
the original Plan of Creation
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for husband and wife.
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So, what happened?
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Well, Eve decided she
was going to try something
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a little different.
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And she chose to
leave her husband's side.
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And in her wanderings
she fell into temptation.
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And after that happened we
see a difference in the role
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of men and women as God
placed there early in Genesis.
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So, then am I to understand
that the problem is that you
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can never
physically leave my side!?
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No! Not at all!
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But it means that women
need to be content with the role
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God has given them, in the home
and not to become disillusioned
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or dissatisfied
looking for something else.
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Ok. So there's a restlessness
that Eve experienced
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an in her restlessness she tried
to take herself into a position
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and do some things that
God never designed for her.
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And as some of you may or may
not know in the Biblical account
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there Eve was standing at that
tree that she wasn't supposed to
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be partaking of and the
Devil insinuated himself there
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as a serpent,
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and gave her the illusion that
if she would just eat this fruit
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she would be, well the
snake was talking supposedly,
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and that she would be like
the Gods and that in reality God
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was withholding something
that was really good for her.
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And if she could
experience this she would have a
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higher understanding.
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Well, as we know, she did
experience this and it didn't
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give her that. All she
got out of that experience was
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she found out what sin
and transgression was like and
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the pain begin there.
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And it immediately
affected their home.
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Up until that point there
was no contention, no problem,
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no strife in the
marriage. But when that happened
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and The Lord came back
to Adam and Eve and wanted
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to make them accountable
immediately blame began.
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Eve blamed, Adam blamed and then
we had the whole problem that
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we still can see in
marriages: blaming each other.
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That's right!
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And so, in Genesis 3:16 in the
second half of the verse there
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this is where we see that
Eve lost her perfect equality.
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She chose to step away
from the role that God gave her
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and she lost her
perfect equality there.
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And part of Eve's consequences
there in Genesis 3:16
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we're told: "thy desire
shall be to thy husband, and he
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shall rule over thee. "
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wooow!
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Rule over! I don't know of
any woman who likes that term:
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to be ruled over!
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It was a hard one for me because
I interpreted that to mean
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that I have no more
choice, no more say!
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That I was to be
controlled by somebody else.
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That's not what it says!
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That's right!
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So, don't click off the program
thinking: "oh boy! Here we go!"
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"Now we're gonna talk about
putting women in their place
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today. " That's not what
we're talking about here.
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Our desire, in our own marriage,
our desire has been to find
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and establish or shall I say
reestablish the real positions
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that God has for us!
Because where He created us
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the closer we can come
back to where He created us
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the happier we are going to be
as individuals and the happier
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more blended we're going to be
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in our marriages.
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That's right! So, let's look
at those roles than that we have
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that God
uniquely designed for us
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to enter into as husband
and wife in the marriage.
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You know, the Apostle Paul tells
us there in 1 Corinthians 11
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verse 3: "I would have you
know, that the head of every man
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is Christ; and the head
of the woman is the man;
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and the head of Christ is God. "
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I think we can take a step back
and look at how Christ shows
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to be under the Heavenly Father.
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It was a choice that He
made. He was equal with God.
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And because of sin, because of
this very scenario that we just
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talked about, where Eve decided
that she was gonna do her own
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thing and than Adam got
involved and we know the story.
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God and Jesus had a plan! Jesus
chose to be under the Lordship
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under the Head of His Father,
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in order to carry out the
plan of salvation. I think
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that's beautiful! It
was a cooperative plan that
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where Jesus willingly,
Jesus chose to willingly become
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a servant. He chose to
become a sun. He chose to become
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a Savior!
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Our savior!
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And that's beautiful!
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And I think if we can
look at this context now where
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where Paul the Apostle says
that "the head of every woman
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is the man. "
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I know in our marriage we
had some struggles with this.
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Early on, especially! -
Well, I wanted you to be
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the head but I
wanted you to do it my way!
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That's right!
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That was the problem!
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I think that if we look
at this in the way that Jesus
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looked at this
for our salvation.
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Aren't you happier
when you are in the position
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that God designed for you to be?
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Oh absolutely! I have found
out to be the happiest I've been
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because I can trust in your
leadership! But it doesn't mean
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that you make all
the decisions alone!
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That's right! -
Because we work together!
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And that's what that
cooperation that is demonstrate
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through Christ and the Father.
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And that same thing needs
to be demonstrated between
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a husband and wife, that's
the cooperation between the two.
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That's right!
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It's like having a team, you
know! Your dad has often talked
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about having a team of
horses out on the farm you know!
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That's right! - He
used to drive a team
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of horses when they planted
the fields or plowed the fields.
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And he talks about, he'd always
tell us about the main horse.
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They were yoked together
but he'd have the main horse
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that was the lead horse
and then the other horse. But
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they were a team together.
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The lead horse by
himself wouldn't be sufficient
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to meet the task. And certainly
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the other one needed the
leadership of the lead horse.
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So I think it's a beautiful
illustration of what God designs
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for us in our marriage, that we
read here in the New Testament,
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the Apostle Paul is
talking about, that cooperation
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that team effort! But there
needs to be a leader and there
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needs to be a
helper, a help meet.
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And even in the beginning,
in the perfect environment
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woman's role was called to
be a help-mate for her husband.
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So, the issue here, in
this I wanna say especially for
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the ladies that are
listening, are watching today.
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The issue here is not
that we have to get woman
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back into her right place.
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And man just goes
on business as usual.
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What we're talking
about is roles, plural today.
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We're talking about getting
men and women back into our
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right roles, because
we're living in a society
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where it's been lost.
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And it's being lost. It hasn't
completely being lost, but
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We wanna see the man
take up responsibility. When I
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began take up responsibility
as the real priest and leader
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of our home it made
it a lot easier for you,
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to take up in desire to
take your role as the wife
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in the home. - That's right!
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So maybe we should turn
to Ephesians 5:22 because
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here we find it very clear.
We've talked about this already
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through this series
Marriage Heart to Heart,
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about the role of the
wife, and it says here:
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"Wives, submit yourselves
unto your own husbands
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as unto the Lord. "
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Now, unless we learn how
to really submit or surrender
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ourselves to God, we are
going to find it impossible
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to really understand how
to submit to our husband.
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Because we have to understand
how to do it unto the Lord first
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And one of the things that
helped me the most was to know
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that God only wants
what is best for me!
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And when I choose to trust Him,
that's really what submission is
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I trust Him with my life!
I trust Him with my being,
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with my happiness, with my
peace with my joy! I trust Him!
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And when I trust God it
makes it easy to trust you!
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- I know! - And
God then fulfills
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what He can do and
He wants to do in us.
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And to give us that
peace and contentment.
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That's right!
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Now was there a time when it was
difficult for you to trust me?
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Oh Yes! - Do you
remember that little
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situation that happened
when we were making our move
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to the country?
00:11:19.85\00:11:20.82
Yes! I was learning
in little things to trust
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and to be submissive, in small
ways and it's a growing process.
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Because having been
single and had my own career
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and my own profession,
lived in my own apartment
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made all my own decisions.
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And to move from that to being
married, you know I wanted that
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dependence on you but I still
had a problem with controlling
00:11:40.14\00:11:43.97
thing myself! And I learned
little by little in small things
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and it was growing
but when we made the move
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and we were leaving our medical
professions and all the security
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of that, and we were
moving to the country
00:11:54.34\00:11:57.74
and you were going
to change occupations
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A lot of changes! - A
lot of changes! All at once!
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I had it all figured
out! This was my plan:
00:12:04.84\00:12:08.09
"Look, we're
gonna move from suburbia
00:12:08.12\00:12:11.03
from health professions,
we're gonna move to the country
00:12:11.06\00:12:13.85
they don't really need a lot of
program directors for radiology,
00:12:14.71\00:12:18.69
X ray teachers" I guess I
could say to make it simple.
00:12:18.72\00:12:22.17
What, you know,
there's not those kind of jobs
00:12:22.70\00:12:25.63
where we were moving.
00:12:25.66\00:12:26.63
So, my reasoning,
my understanding was:
00:12:27.20\00:12:31.90
"I'll just continue my nursing
profession, I'll be a nurse.
00:12:31.94\00:12:35.05
everywhere, everywhere
there's jobs for nurses!
00:12:35.08\00:12:38.53
I'll continue in my role as
a nurse and make a little money
00:12:38.57\00:12:42.71
to sustain the family until you
could establish your profession"
00:12:42.75\00:12:48.56
And what did I think about that?
00:12:49.82\00:12:50.99
You challenged me!
00:12:52.78\00:12:54.31
In a very loving way!
00:12:55.20\00:12:56.60
You said: "Honey we're not
gonna move across the country,
00:12:57.08\00:13:01.07
for you to be out of
the home and working. "
00:13:01.10\00:13:03.80
"The whole purpose of this is
to return to God's original plan
00:13:04.28\00:13:07.75
as close as we can!"
00:13:07.78\00:13:09.30
"I don't want you working!"
00:13:09.78\00:13:11.31
And, you know: "I'll take care
of you!" That was the promise,
00:13:11.81\00:13:14.81
the commitment you made to me.
00:13:14.84\00:13:17.39
- I know. - And I found it a joy
00:13:17.42\00:13:19.90
to surrender to that. Because it
wasn't looking for my way out.
00:13:19.94\00:13:24.56
'Cause you really didn't wanna
go back to work at that point.
00:13:25.37\00:13:28.45
I really didn't want to, but
I felt like you know somebody
00:13:28.48\00:13:31.53
has to make an income. - Yes!
00:13:31.56\00:13:33.18
But, I trusted you in that and
I saw you put forth a diligent
00:13:33.62\00:13:37.20
effort and I saw a willingness
in you to do whatever it took,
00:13:37.23\00:13:39.96
in order to provide for
the family. -That's right!
00:13:40.00\00:13:42.70
I would've done
Glitches(?) if I needed to.
00:13:42.73\00:13:45.00
Or razed worms. You
talked about razing worms.
00:13:45.04\00:13:47.28
I wasn't impressed. I'm sorry!
00:13:47.31\00:13:48.72
You know, right here I
think it might be good for
00:13:50.05\00:13:53.68
our viewing audience,
this is not to say that a woman
00:13:53.71\00:13:57.31
doesn't need to be prepared
where there's a genuine need.
00:13:58.55\00:14:02.09
That's right!
00:14:02.12\00:14:03.09
Where there's a health challenge
where there's a crisis.
00:14:03.10\00:14:06.39
A single parent. -
Where there's a single parent.
00:14:06.42\00:14:09.15
There's many different
situations. But what we were
00:14:09.19\00:14:12.24
talking about in what
we were going through was:
00:14:12.28\00:14:15.30
If my wife would've begin
working it would've made it
00:14:15.33\00:14:19.10
too easy for us to miss
the transition that God wanted
00:14:19.14\00:14:22.90
and was preparing for us.
00:14:22.93\00:14:24.66
And we see this a lot. We
see many, many marriages today
00:14:25.17\00:14:28.82
where it's either because
of a life-style that wants
00:14:28.86\00:14:32.01
to be maintained, that
you got two people that are
00:14:32.04\00:14:35.07
working together out
there in the work force and
00:14:35.11\00:14:38.06
and the family is straggling
in some of those areas.
00:14:38.10\00:14:41.02
Or it's just that maybe
the wife can make more money
00:14:41.55\00:14:44.74
than the husband. When
that scenario was happening
00:14:44.78\00:14:47.94
if the husband isn't working
00:14:47.97\00:14:50.48
to change that scenario we
have found over and over again
00:14:51.00\00:14:55.11
that it creates
imbalances in the marriage.
00:14:55.90\00:14:58.01
And we find as woman has
left her role of nurturing
00:14:58.88\00:15:02.51
the children in the
home and being a home maker
00:15:02.54\00:15:06.10
and providing a little
"haven on earth" for the family
00:15:06.14\00:15:10.25
as she has left that role
and has entered into the career
00:15:10.29\00:15:14.37
scene shall I say, and
that becomes her life-focus,
00:15:14.40\00:15:19.47
we see the
deterioration of families. -Yes!
00:15:20.07\00:15:22.32
all around the world
it's the result of that!
00:15:22.36\00:15:24.54
Everywhere this has happened
we see deterioration in the
00:15:24.58\00:15:27.48
families. And so,
in order to continue
00:15:27.51\00:15:32.92
to develop our relationship
as husband and wife we felt
00:15:33.69\00:15:37.76
the need to go
back to the original.
00:15:37.79\00:15:40.67
And strife(?) for the
original, for the best!
00:15:40.71\00:15:43.79
and to whatever level
God could bless us with,
00:15:43.82\00:15:46.87
that's where we
would be content.
00:15:46.90\00:15:48.45
That's right!
00:15:48.48\00:15:49.45
Well, we need to
take a break right now
00:15:49.70\00:15:51.50
and we will come
back and we'll talk about
00:15:51.54\00:15:53.31
the man's responsibly,
the husband's responsibility.
00:15:54.55\00:15:58.02
So, stay with us!
00:15:58.05\00:15:59.45
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Welcome back!
00:16:36.91\00:16:38.02
As we're talking here
together about the roles,
00:16:38.49\00:16:41.42
understanding our
roles as husband and wife.
00:16:41.46\00:16:44.36
We were just beginning to
talk about the importance of the
00:16:44.91\00:16:47.52
husband's responsibility
here. It's not just what
00:16:47.55\00:16:51.12
you need to do! Or
how you need to change or
00:16:51.15\00:16:53.83
reestablish your role.
00:16:53.86\00:16:55.90
We men, need to look at how we
can reestablish our proper role.
00:16:56.81\00:17:02.09
And I think the verse
in Ephesians 5 verse 25 is
00:17:02.12\00:17:06.56
is an
appropriate starting place or
00:17:06.59\00:17:11.11
a real stepping stone to that.
00:17:11.14\00:17:13.59
"Husbands", it says "love
your wives, even as Christ loved
00:17:14.17\00:17:18.11
the church, and
gave himself for it"
00:17:18.14\00:17:21.54
The first key
here is giving myself.
00:17:22.94\00:17:25.66
It isn't being a
dictator. - That's right!
00:17:26.81\00:17:28.81
If I'm going to really love you,
00:17:29.68\00:17:32.68
in the same way that
Christ loves his people,
00:17:32.72\00:17:35.25
loves the church and
gave himself that I'm gonna
00:17:35.29\00:17:37.75
be willing to give myself.
True leadership is service
00:17:37.79\00:17:41.93
and servants and it's
interesting that even in
00:17:41.96\00:17:45.02
top corporations the
top people who really have
00:17:45.05\00:17:48.04
successful employees are people
that stay in communication
00:17:48.08\00:17:51.59
with those people that
they are really in communication
00:17:51.62\00:17:55.10
and service from
the top. - That's right!
00:17:55.13\00:17:58.13
It's really a blend of both
roles that God has given us here
00:17:58.53\00:18:03.02
to bring us perfect harmony and
unity and it's a perfect balance
00:18:03.05\00:18:07.51
because as wives learn
to let the husband lead
00:18:07.54\00:18:11.35
and to be
submissive to their leadership
00:18:11.38\00:18:13.95
and to work and cooperate
with that leadership and
00:18:13.99\00:18:16.65
husbands learn to love their
wives we have a marriage truly
00:18:16.69\00:18:20.84
Heart to Heart.
00:18:20.87\00:18:21.89
But when either one of us are
refusing to enter into our role
00:18:21.92\00:18:26.37
that God has clearly marked out
we find conflict in the marriage
00:18:26.40\00:18:30.84
If a wife is submissive and
the husband doesn't love her
00:18:30.87\00:18:34.73
you have conflict. And if
the husband loves his wife but
00:18:34.76\00:18:39.48
the wife refuses to let him
lead and to be in subjection not
00:18:39.51\00:18:44.20
to be dominated
by but to be led,
00:18:44.23\00:18:47.44
you have conflict!
00:18:48.03\00:18:49.27
That's right!
00:18:49.30\00:18:50.27
It's really "the two
me(s)" in operation again
00:18:50.28\00:18:53.10
instead of "the us"
the wife submission and
00:18:53.13\00:18:56.27
the husband's love brings
us to a loving us relationship.
00:18:56.30\00:19:00.44
That's right! -
And that's what we keep
00:19:00.47\00:19:01.97
working towards 'cause I'm not a
perfect submitter all the time!
00:19:02.01\00:19:05.12
But I'm learning
that I'm happier that way.
00:19:05.55\00:19:07.45
And I think that as I'm
learning one of the things that
00:19:07.49\00:19:11.38
frustrates many women, and
we've talked to many couples
00:19:11.41\00:19:14.38
where this is the case,
one of the things that really
00:19:14.42\00:19:17.36
frustrates women is
where they're desirous.
00:19:17.39\00:19:20.73
They want to have
their husband lead.
00:19:20.76\00:19:24.16
And the husband just refuses.
00:19:24.19\00:19:25.75
And leadership here is in
giving ourselves. It means
00:19:27.24\00:19:32.14
giving ourselves!
00:19:32.17\00:19:34.04
to do what we need to do for the
family as the head of the family
00:19:34.76\00:19:38.19
as the priest of the home.
00:19:38.22\00:19:39.59
And so, it makes it difficult
for a wife if I'm not really
00:19:40.11\00:19:45.22
supporting you as a husband,
if I'm not really leading
00:19:46.97\00:19:49.15
the way, doesn't
that make it hard for you?
00:19:49.18\00:19:51.54
to wanna follow?
00:19:51.57\00:19:52.92
Oh, absolutely,
because I don't have
00:19:52.96\00:19:54.53
confidence
there! - That's right!
00:19:54.56\00:19:56.06
But as I had put my
confidence in the Lord
00:19:56.10\00:19:58.71
He helps me to find
ways that I can encourage you
00:19:58.75\00:20:01.17
to take up that
role. - That's right!
00:20:01.20\00:20:02.40
instead of criticizing. And
I think this is very important
00:20:02.44\00:20:06.84
for us as women that we
encourage and lift our husband
00:20:06.87\00:20:10.94
to help them to gain
that leadership that we want.
00:20:10.98\00:20:15.02
And not to condemn
them and criticize them
00:20:15.52\00:20:17.91
when they don't do it
our way or when they fail.
00:20:17.95\00:20:20.08
Because this area, well
we have a lot of influence in
00:20:20.56\00:20:25.90
how affective our will
love us and lead in the family.
00:20:25.93\00:20:31.24
Yes!
00:20:31.27\00:20:32.24
Hebrews 13:5, Jesus, this is
really the model of Jesus for us
00:20:32.25\00:20:39.76
And He says: "I will never
leave thee, nor forsake thee"
00:20:39.79\00:20:43.50
- That's very
comforting! - Isn't it though?
00:20:43.53\00:20:45.32
- Yes! - And He is
to us, He is our God
00:20:45.35\00:20:50.74
He is our Savior. He
plays the role to us as
00:20:50.78\00:20:54.90
the Husband and we as
His church or His people
00:20:54.93\00:20:59.02
we are the Bride.
00:20:59.58\00:21:00.67
And so, here we are in
this relationship and we know
00:21:00.71\00:21:03.87
that we can always count on Him.
00:21:03.90\00:21:06.24
He will never
leave us, or forsake us!
00:21:06.28\00:21:08.00
It is been one of the
things that I've tried to do
00:21:08.50\00:21:09.87
in our marriage. It is to give
you the security that I will
00:21:09.91\00:21:13.28
not leave you or forsake you.
00:21:13.31\00:21:15.26
That doesn't mean just
to get a divorce from you.
00:21:15.30\00:21:17.30
- That's right!
- Or a separation.
00:21:17.33\00:21:18.50
It means that I wanna be
there so you can count on me in
00:21:19.00\00:21:23.05
every situation and
the little things of life.
00:21:23.08\00:21:25.86
That I'm there to be the
leader, to be the priest,
00:21:26.40\00:21:30.00
to be the house
bend. - My protector.
00:21:30.03\00:21:33.32
- Yes! To be these
things and to provide for you.
00:21:33.36\00:21:37.42
And as I am choosing to do that
00:21:37.91\00:21:41.81
and choosing to
trust Christ to do that
00:21:42.26\00:21:44.63
is that providing
to you this security?
00:21:44.67\00:21:47.01
Oh, no question! I
mean I could trust anything
00:21:47.55\00:21:50.79
you know, even if we
were separated I know
00:21:50.83\00:21:54.00
I can trust you and I
look to you to run my ideas by.
00:21:54.04\00:21:59.16
I look to you for your
judgment for your input.
00:21:59.19\00:22:01.42
And for you to make a decision,
not always but in many things I
00:22:01.46\00:22:05.92
do, even if they could
be simple things that I
00:22:05.95\00:22:08.21
can do in the home. Even
if I'm the one making those
00:22:08.25\00:22:10.83
decisions in your absence I
still like to run them by you,
00:22:10.87\00:22:14.70
and get your input for them.
00:22:14.73\00:22:16.63
Well, I think that's the
beautiful thing and this is
00:22:17.00\00:22:20.27
what I wanna bring
through to the viewers today.
00:22:20.30\00:22:23.54
This understanding in
reestablishing of our roles
00:22:24.51\00:22:27.00
is not where we're trying
to say: "Ok, let's get this
00:22:27.04\00:22:29.50
woman back in her
place, here!" - That's right!
00:22:29.53\00:22:34.47
"Let's put here
in her place!" Right?
00:22:34.50\00:22:35.77
This restless woman
that needs.. - Restraint!
00:22:35.81\00:22:39.42
Now let's let God put us each
back in our rightful places.
00:22:40.34\00:22:45.94
Because it's as we are
the husband and the wife
00:22:46.46\00:22:51.08
that God wants us to be,
as my wife is truly submissive
00:22:51.11\00:22:55.53
first to the
Lord as unto the Lord.
00:22:55.56\00:22:57.17
As you are truly submissive
to the Lord you find your
00:22:57.75\00:23:00.88
your greatest opportunity to
be submissive and to serve me.
00:23:00.92\00:23:06.45
That's right!
00:23:06.48\00:23:07.45
And as I am surrendered
to the Lord I find my
00:23:07.46\00:23:10.25
greatest ability
then to love you!
00:23:10.28\00:23:13.91
As Christ loved the church
and to give myself for you.
00:23:14.65\00:23:18.56
Ok?
00:23:19.22\00:23:20.19
And so, it isn't: "Let's
get woman back and get man
00:23:20.20\00:23:24.52
dominating again!" Now let's
get woman back in the position
00:23:24.56\00:23:29.29
where she's contented to be what
God intended for woman to be.
00:23:29.33\00:23:34.03
And you have things
that I'll never have.
00:23:34.53\00:23:37.10
I mean we've talked
about this before. You have
00:23:37.14\00:23:41.17
strength, that God given
strength of how you relate
00:23:41.20\00:23:45.20
in the home environment.
Even though you had a
00:23:45.23\00:23:47.61
professional career
when I met you I can see
00:23:47.64\00:23:49.95
over & over again this ability
to, well nest making. Ok?
00:23:49.99\00:23:55.51
And the bond that you have
with the children, specially
00:23:56.10\00:23:58.30
when they were young,
00:23:58.33\00:23:59.38
Is something that men
cannot equal. And I believe
00:23:59.42\00:24:03.54
that in the roles that God gave
us that, that is a special gift
00:24:03.58\00:24:08.43
that He gives to women.
00:24:08.46\00:24:09.82
And He makes us men, you
know we talk about the bucks
00:24:10.36\00:24:13.54
we have a lot of bucks and
deer that come through our yard
00:24:13.58\00:24:16.67
where we live up
in North-West Montana.
00:24:16.70\00:24:18.72
And it's amazing to
watch the little bucks,
00:24:19.30\00:24:21.93
those little tiny bucks before
they even have any antlers
00:24:22.69\00:24:26.74
They're up there
ramming into those big bucks.
00:24:27.13\00:24:31.40
This bucks with
these huge racks on them.
00:24:31.43\00:24:34.33
And, that's what the little..
they're getting prepared
00:24:34.36\00:24:36.93
- To face a harsh
world. - For the harsh world.
00:24:36.96\00:24:39.07
And I believe God puts in
us as men that part of our role
00:24:39.11\00:24:43.51
is being out there
and facing a hard world
00:24:43.54\00:24:46.94
a tough world and that
you're designed in a special way
00:24:47.40\00:24:50.86
to have that bond and
that love with the children.
00:24:50.89\00:24:53.15
And, not that I don't
have the bond with our children
00:24:53.70\00:24:57.15
I certainly do! But the
roles there, there's a distinct
00:24:57.18\00:25:00.60
difference and
they blend together
00:25:00.63\00:25:03.19
to complement
the home beautifully.
00:25:03.22\00:25:05.71
That's right! It makes
us complete in our marriage
00:25:05.75\00:25:08.52
that way. - That's right!
00:25:08.55\00:25:09.52
Because we each are
taking up our responsibilities
00:25:09.53\00:25:12.68
to make the home
run harmoniously.
00:25:12.71\00:25:14.74
One of the greatest
blessings I found was to start
00:25:15.12\00:25:17.65
studying through
Scripture about women.
00:25:17.68\00:25:20.41
And I wanna encourage you
women to go to the Bible and
00:25:20.45\00:25:23.20
study what God has to
say about women there.
00:25:23.23\00:25:26.07
Look how women lived with
Christ through their roles
00:25:26.50\00:25:29.89
that God had given
them. Especially in
00:25:29.92\00:25:31.76
the Book of Titus and
Timothy we can get a tremendous
00:25:31.80\00:25:34.57
encouragement and I know
what it's done in my life.
00:25:34.61\00:25:37.35
It doesn't make me
any less of a person.
00:25:37.38\00:25:39.35
I become more complete as
I'm willing to be submitted
00:25:39.39\00:25:42.45
to Christ and learn how
to be that true companion
00:25:42.48\00:25:45.51
to my husband.
00:25:45.54\00:25:46.61
And the same goes for
the men. I think men we need
00:25:47.21\00:25:50.33
to take responsibility,
we need to recognize that
00:25:50.36\00:25:53.49
if we wanna become the
men that God wants us to be
00:25:53.52\00:25:56.69
godly leaders, the
priest of our home, we need
00:25:56.73\00:25:59.83
to be spending time in God's
world that is where we'll find
00:25:59.87\00:26:03.74
the answers, which really leads
us into the personal challenge
00:26:03.77\00:26:07.61
for the viewing audience today.
00:26:07.64\00:26:08.61
If we're going to be
understanding our roles then
00:26:10.32\00:26:14.63
we need to really, as
husbands, love our wives!
00:26:14.66\00:26:18.94
Even as Christ loved
the church and gave himself.
00:26:19.55\00:26:23.23
Husbands we need to be
willing to turn to Christ!
00:26:23.27\00:26:26.88
We'll never be able to love like
Christ unless we're surrendered
00:26:26.92\00:26:30.96
like Christ
surrendered Himself to become
00:26:30.99\00:26:34.29
the sin-bearer of the world.
00:26:34.32\00:26:35.67
We need to love our
wives, we need to give ourselves
00:26:36.15\00:26:39.84
to our wives and make
their lives easier in the role
00:26:39.88\00:26:43.54
that God has given them.
00:26:43.57\00:26:44.60
And we wives, we need
to encourage our husband to
00:26:45.21\00:26:48.28
take up that role. And we
need to cooperate with them
00:26:48.32\00:26:51.36
and allow them to
lead us and our family.
00:26:51.39\00:26:54.66
That has been such a
blessing in our home.
00:26:54.69\00:26:56.71
And I wanna challenge you
the way God has challenged me
00:26:56.75\00:26:59.85
that with Him it is possible!
00:26:59.88\00:27:01.76
Amen!
00:27:01.79\00:27:02.76
And we need Him to make it
possible! Let's pray together!
00:27:02.77\00:27:06.11
Father in Heaven we
need Your Grace to be
00:27:06.73\00:27:09.38
the true husbands and
wives that you want us to be.
00:27:10.09\00:27:12.90
We thank You that
You give us the power
00:27:13.41\00:27:15.33
in Jesus name Amen!
00:27:15.36\00:27:17.57
Well we hope that you'll
join us again as we talk about:
00:27:19.28\00:27:22.66
Finding Forgiveness
00:27:22.69\00:27:24.42
That's gonna be a
good topic, isn't it dear?
00:27:24.46\00:27:26.27
Oh, yes! Something we all need!
00:27:26.30\00:27:28.31
And we've had to learn to
find that real forgiveness
00:27:28.35\00:27:31.02
in our marriage,
haven't we? - Yes!
00:27:31.05\00:27:32.89
And it's there! It's
there if we are willing
00:27:32.94\00:27:37.05
because true
forgiveness only comes from God!
00:27:37.08\00:27:41.16
So we look
forward to seeing you!
00:27:41.70\00:27:43.16
Marriage Heart to Heart!
00:27:44.14\00:27:45.55
Marriage in God's Hands
00:27:48.97\00:27:50.51