The following
program features real clients
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discussing sensitive issues.
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The views and opinions
expressed in this program
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don't necessarily reflect
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that of 3ABN's
Dare to Dream Network.
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Viewer discretion is advised.
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Hi, I'm Dr. Kim Logan-Nowlin,
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and welcome to Live To Be Well.
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What is live to be well?
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Mind, body and soul,
but that commitment to God.
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God makes all things possible.
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Today, I want to talk
about commitment to God,
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having that clear,
good relationship with God
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not just going to church
and going through the motion,
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but spending
time in His presence.
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Today, I want to
welcome Elder Jamel Dorsett.
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Welcome, Elder, how are you?
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Doing well, Doc. And
thank you for having me.
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So I know you're an elder.
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But I also know you as Jamel,
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because I've seen you
grow up in the church.
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You have. Yes, I have.
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I'm not that much older. Okay?
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So let's talk about who you are.
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You grew up at the Ecorse
Seventh-day Adventist Church.
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I did, yes. As well your family.
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All right? Exactly.
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And so, are you a
second, third, fourth generation
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Seventh-day Adventist?
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Third. You're third generation.
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What does that mean to you
being a Seventh-day Adventist?
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I think it means
everything in light of my faith,
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commitment, what has been
instilled in me from my birth,
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and of course, to be
able to practice that
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openly and honestly,
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as it relates to
my commitment to God.
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You are first
elder in your church.
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I am. That's a
lot of responsibility.
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Very much. What's
involved with that?
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And why did you
take that position?
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I know many are
called but few are chosen.
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Very true. So
why did you say yes?
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I said yes, because I
think it's a part of my calling,
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having gone through
the rigors of Andrews
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and then doing an MDiv.
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And, of course,
preparing for pastoral ministry.
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It's just something
that automatically came.
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But, of course, I was a
little bit nervous about it.
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Because I know
the commitment. Yeah.
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Of course, being absent,
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I would be the one
to take on the helm.
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And that is a difficult charge,
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specifically in the context
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of being led by the Holy Spirit.
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But when I visit your church,
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I see you doing
Sabbath School also.
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So are you Sabbath
School superintendent
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or one of the teachers,
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you know, 'cause
I've sat in your class?
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As a matter of fact,
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I used to be the Sabbath
School superintendent at Ecorse.
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So what I find myself doing
is stepping up where need be.
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And that's what a
pastor or an elder does.
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So sometimes when you
come to church on Sabbath,
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individuals might be a
little bit short staffed,
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so I'll just kind of jump
in and fill in where need.
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All right, you love the Lord?
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I do love the Lord. Why?
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I love the Lord
because He loves me.
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Matter of fact, that's
what the scripture says,
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He first died
for us and loved us.
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And initially,
what I tried to do is
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imitate that
through my character
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and my actions.
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You mentioned MDiv
Masters of Divinity
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from Andrews University.
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Again, Andrews University
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is one of the
Seventh-day Adventist schools
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located in
Berrien Springs, Michigan
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for undergrad
and higher education.
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So you felt a
calling to do MDiv.
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I did. I did.
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As a matter of
fact, being active
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and engaged in a church
for many years that I have,
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I knew I had to
further my education.
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And of course, that
began with both undergrad
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and then of course,
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matriculating to the
theological seminary,
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and it has been
tremendously a blessing
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has truly shaped my life.
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Praise God. How has
it shaped your life?
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Well, it gives you
a sense of purpose,
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which initially, when
we're born and created
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in the image of God,
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we have that
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but, of course, it
puts you in a context
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of a deeper calling,
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what's important?
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Is it the tangible
things of this earth?
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Or is it a high
calling in reference
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to what he would have us to do?
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And I believe in
the context of that
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that equates to service.
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Service, Jesus,
He came to serve.
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He did. And we...
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And with humility,
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and how does humility
work with your ministry?
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Oh, I think humility is
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provocatively
profound in my ministry,
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I don't think you can minister
without a sense of humility.
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All of us have been
given gifts and talents.
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But how do we use
that in the context
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of how God has blessed stuff?
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I mean, I grew up
in the city of Detroit,
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you know, so to be able to
grow up in the city of Detroit
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to matriculate to
Andrews University,
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higher education.
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I'm totally humbled by that.
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And I use that as an experience
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to show others that
they can do the same thing.
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Well, you know what?
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I want to go back
to Andrews University
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because something
special happened to you
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at Andrews University.
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It did. You met someone?
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Lord help us. Yes, I did. I did.
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I met a wonderful,
wonderful young lady.
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As a matter of
fact, she was educator,
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still is an educator.
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Yes.
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And, of course,
we begin courting
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and then courting
led on to counseling
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and counseling
led on to marriage.
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How important is counseling
in premarital counseling?
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Well, I don't
think I could say it.
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If I had to echo
it from a rooftop,
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I would say vitally important,
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um, because you're
looking at two different people
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from two different backgrounds,
two different characters,
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two different demeanors.
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And initially, when you sit down
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with that counselor,
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the counselor
unpacks all of your stuff.
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Yes.
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And sometimes we
don't like to deal
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with our stuff or baggage.
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No, we not.
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And you're dealing
with those personalities.
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Yes.
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See in the
beginning of that romance you,
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you know, you
get the flirtation,
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infatuation,
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you don't see the flaws.
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But when you
start getting in there,
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you say to yourself,
this is not healthy for me.
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Absolutely.
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I remember I went to a wedding
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with one of my god sons.
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And I said, as
soon as I met her,
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I said, this is not the one.
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He says, Oh my,
why would you say this?
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I love her. I love her.
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I said, I'm telling
you, this is not the one.
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And they did not have
the premarital counseling,
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and both Seventh-day Adventists.
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And they just believe that
this is what was going to be,
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it was going to
be the best for them.
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And they've had
some serious challenges.
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And they're in counseling
today dealing with that.
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Yes.
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You and I have known each
other but you took a risk.
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I did.
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You took a risk
by contacting me,
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and to ask me to
be your therapist.
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Of course, yeah.
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And usually people don't
want to be that transparent
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because I see you in church.
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That's true.
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I don't want that
person knowing my business.
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But you stepped out on
faith and you called me.
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I did.
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And I was surprised
because of the fact,
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we usually
don't hear from people
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with inside our church.
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They go outside.
Why did you call me?
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Well, I think it's
important, I think you said,
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well, we have a history there.
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You know, I've
known you for many years,
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both you and your husband,
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of course when he was
living, wonderful individual.
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And of course,
you still are as well,
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just a gifted and
anointed person of God,
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and someone who
has the skill level
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and the education to
help both myself and my wife.
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So that was
initially why I called,
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and I would say that my
wife wasn't on board at first.
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Because, of
course, as you stated,
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knowing people's
business in the church
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and just wanting a safe place.
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So that's why I put
in the initial call.
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Yeah.
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So recognizing that
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you knew you needed some help,
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because the myth is
that we don't get help.
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You know, African-Americans
don't get help.
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But not only did
you marry a woman
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she's from, she's not American.
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That is true.
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What are some of
the challenges...
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Where is she from?
She's from the Bahamas?
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And so what are
some of the challenges
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you being American
and her from the Bahamas?
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You know, there
is, first of all,
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there's a communication,
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there's a
difference in communication.
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She is Bahamian,
her mother's Jamaican.
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So sometimes
there is some issues
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there of how we
talk to each other
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some things that
are said, how it said,
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the body language
there, all of those have been
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challenging for
us over the years.
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In this initially,
that's why we sought your help.
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So you can help us unpack
that to see where we need to be.
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Yes.
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How important is
it for you to study
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your Word on a daily basis?
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Oh, my goodness. Very important.
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You know what?
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It's amazing,
Dr. Kim, I can tell
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when I have not studied my Word,
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because my
character is totally off.
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Yeah. So I'm an early riser.
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I'm up for four, five
o'clock in the morning,
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because my days are long.
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Yes.
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So initially, I read
several devotional books
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and not just the
Sabbath School lesson,
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men of integrity.
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I read a lot of
Dr. King's writings.
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Things that
pours into my spirit,
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things that will
help me be more active
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and more progressive
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as I continue my Christian walk,
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And you utilize
that in your daily walk
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in your home and your marriage.
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Absolutely.
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Balancing all of this.
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Where's Mrs.
Dorsett in all of this?
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How do you get her in there?
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Exactly, exactly. You know what?
00:09:05.41\00:09:07.11
We try to have
time as best as we can.
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As a matter of
fact, it's amazing.
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As I came home yesterday,
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and she came home,
she said, Well, hun,
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one of the things
that Dr. Kim told us
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is that when we come home,
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we need to kind of
digress a little bit
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and see how each
other's day is spend.
00:09:18.42\00:09:20.86
So we find time,
you have to make time,
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it's critical to
the relationship,
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turning off the iPhone,
turning off the television.
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With me, it might be answering
the email from a client,
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you have to turn it off.
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Yeah.
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And check out the best
interest of the person.
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Yes.
00:09:34.80\00:09:36.14
So making sure
that you have time,
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make sure that you are,
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you know, reading
the Word of God together,
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praying together.
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How important is for couples to,
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you know, read the Word
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and have that
spiritual connection
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in their marriage?
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I think it's very important.
00:09:49.28\00:09:50.62
I think the Lord wants us
to come together as a couple
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to be able to
nurture each other,
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to watch each other grow.
00:09:55.79\00:09:57.76
That's what
couples should do. Yes.
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In this ideal world,
you know, we're very busy.
00:09:59.89\00:10:02.63
But that's what the
enemy wants us to be busy,
00:10:02.66\00:10:04.93
you know, but we
have to prioritize.
00:10:04.97\00:10:07.07
So my wife and I, we
find ourselves prioritizing,
00:10:07.10\00:10:09.80
kneeling together,
00:10:09.84\00:10:11.17
looking at each
other in eye contact.
00:10:11.21\00:10:13.81
You know, hun, what's
going on with you today?
00:10:13.84\00:10:15.94
How are you
feeling this morning?
00:10:15.98\00:10:17.45
How can I be a blessing to you?
00:10:17.48\00:10:19.18
It's very important.
00:10:19.21\00:10:20.55
I you your love
word is hun. Yes.
00:10:20.58\00:10:22.38
You know how long
you've been saying hun,
00:10:22.42\00:10:24.35
even your dating stage?
00:10:24.39\00:10:25.72
I would say probably yeah,
00:10:25.75\00:10:27.89
maybe about four years
00:10:27.92\00:10:29.26
because we've been married
a total of five years now.
00:10:29.29\00:10:31.63
In January of 2020
would make six years.
00:10:31.66\00:10:33.86
Now were you
married in the Bahamas
00:10:33.90\00:10:35.23
or in the United States?
00:10:35.26\00:10:36.60
We were actually
married here in the States.
00:10:36.63\00:10:38.23
Is that right. How
come I didn't get invited.
00:10:38.27\00:10:39.73
What was up with
that? Okay. You were busy.
00:10:39.77\00:10:41.54
I was busy.
00:10:41.57\00:10:44.01
So next thing I
know Jamel is married.
00:10:44.04\00:10:46.04
I'm like what?
00:10:46.07\00:10:47.41
I missed it, you know 'cause
I get all the invitations.
00:10:47.44\00:10:49.28
I'm blessed. I'm blessed.
00:10:49.31\00:10:50.65
That's favor from the Lord.
00:10:50.68\00:10:52.15
You know, when
you're a good person,
00:10:52.18\00:10:53.75
you pour into people's lives.
00:10:53.78\00:10:55.12
But you've also put
in mind your family,
00:10:55.15\00:10:57.72
you know, how your aunt
poured into Arthur's life.
00:10:57.75\00:11:01.19
Yes,
00:11:01.22\00:11:02.56
when Arthur was
looking for this position,
00:11:02.59\00:11:05.19
and she was like,
meet me for lunch.
00:11:05.23\00:11:07.66
And she hired Arthur
as her deputy director.
00:11:07.70\00:11:11.07
And that was a blessing to us,
00:11:11.10\00:11:13.74
not just financially,
but the relationship.
00:11:13.77\00:11:16.40
And he learned so
much from your aunt,
00:11:16.44\00:11:18.37
and where he was in
the field of social work
00:11:18.41\00:11:21.44
and how she helped guide him.
00:11:21.48\00:11:23.55
Now, let me ask you this.
00:11:23.58\00:11:25.65
How do you deal with
disagreements in your church?
00:11:25.68\00:11:29.25
You're the head
elder, someone comes to you.
00:11:29.28\00:11:31.62
Well, I didn't like
what you said today.
00:11:31.65\00:11:33.99
I think you were wrong.
00:11:34.02\00:11:35.79
And then now
they're in the court door
00:11:35.82\00:11:37.56
of the church.
00:11:37.59\00:11:38.93
How do you handle that?
00:11:38.96\00:11:40.30
Well, first of all,
tactfully, very tactfully,
00:11:40.33\00:11:43.10
very humbly, I believe we
mentioned that earlier on.
00:11:43.13\00:11:45.93
You have to keep in mind
when you're the head elder
00:11:45.97\00:11:47.80
when you're in leadership,
00:11:47.84\00:11:49.17
whether it's
pastorial or eldership,
00:11:49.20\00:11:51.17
you have to have a
keen sense of discernment.
00:11:51.21\00:11:53.68
You're dealing with all
00:11:53.71\00:11:55.04
different types of
personalities, characters.
00:11:55.08\00:11:57.61
Our church is made
up of African-Americans
00:11:57.65\00:11:59.68
and of course,
Bahamians, Jamaicans.
00:11:59.71\00:12:01.72
So you just have to
have a humble spirit.
00:12:01.75\00:12:03.55
Yes.
00:12:03.59\00:12:04.92
And that includes maybe
pulling the person aside,
00:12:04.95\00:12:06.69
privately some time
saying, you know what?
00:12:06.72\00:12:08.82
I'm trying, I want to
hear you, what is your concern?
00:12:08.86\00:12:11.73
I can see that you're
a little bit agitated.
00:12:11.76\00:12:13.43
And I want to see how
can we help this process?
00:12:13.46\00:12:15.90
So that's what
you would do? Yes.
00:12:15.93\00:12:17.33
So he's deal take
them into the private area.
00:12:17.37\00:12:20.74
Of course.
00:12:20.77\00:12:22.17
You know, and if
pastor is not there,
00:12:22.20\00:12:24.27
you are responsible
00:12:24.31\00:12:25.64
for the whole
operation of the church.
00:12:25.67\00:12:27.54
You know, what do you do
00:12:27.58\00:12:28.91
when pastor calls
you at the last minute
00:12:28.94\00:12:31.88
said, I need you to speak.
00:12:31.91\00:12:33.25
It is challenging, you know,
00:12:33.28\00:12:34.95
but one of my
mentors always told me,
00:12:34.98\00:12:36.65
he says, a true pastor
is prepared at all times.
00:12:36.69\00:12:40.02
And what he meant by
that is just always having
00:12:40.06\00:12:42.22
a manuscript ready.
00:12:42.26\00:12:43.99
So when the pastor
calls me at a late hour
00:12:44.03\00:12:46.76
and needs me to preach.
00:12:46.80\00:12:48.13
By God's grace, I'm prepared,
00:12:48.16\00:12:49.53
you know, and it's
amazing how the Lord oftentimes
00:12:49.56\00:12:51.93
gives us a word to
speak to His people.
00:12:51.97\00:12:53.84
He does, He really
does. God is faithful.
00:12:53.87\00:12:56.54
Now, I remember in
a counseling session,
00:12:56.57\00:12:59.31
you talked about
several of your members passing.
00:12:59.34\00:13:02.24
Yes.
00:13:02.28\00:13:03.61
And our prayers
are with you all.
00:13:03.65\00:13:05.48
And you had to leave
home at 3 AM in the morning,
00:13:05.51\00:13:09.18
because you were
closer to the family.
00:13:09.22\00:13:12.09
Of course. And
so what did you do?
00:13:12.12\00:13:14.92
Yeah, so I received the
call, it was roughly about maybe
00:13:14.96\00:13:17.26
4:55, 5 o'clock, I wake early.
00:13:17.29\00:13:20.56
I'm usually up at that time,
but this particular morning,
00:13:20.60\00:13:22.90
I have not been.
00:13:22.93\00:13:24.27
So when I see the number,
I knew what had happened.
00:13:24.30\00:13:27.64
Pastor unfortunately doesn't
live close to where I live.
00:13:27.67\00:13:31.27
And I just immediately
got up, we prayed, showered,
00:13:31.31\00:13:34.84
put on my suit.
00:13:34.88\00:13:36.21
And it is amazing
arrived, maybe around 6 o'clock
00:13:36.24\00:13:41.78
and the entire
family was outside
00:13:41.82\00:13:43.45
at the cancer institution.
00:13:43.49\00:13:45.12
And I ministered right
there on the spot to the family.
00:13:45.15\00:13:47.72
Wow.
00:13:47.76\00:13:49.09
Thus so talk about God's timing.
00:13:49.12\00:13:50.46
You can't beat
it. You can't beat it.
00:13:50.49\00:13:51.96
Not at all.
00:13:51.99\00:13:53.33
You know, talk
about your journey
00:13:53.36\00:13:54.70
becoming a chaplain?
00:13:54.73\00:13:56.06
Yes.
00:13:56.10\00:13:57.43
So it's amazing,
started my chaplaincy
00:13:57.47\00:13:58.80
in behavior health,
00:13:58.83\00:14:00.17
believe it or not,
00:14:00.20\00:14:01.70
and it was truly a blessing
00:14:01.74\00:14:03.51
and was able to
finish my first unit.
00:14:03.54\00:14:05.64
And then of
course, a year after,
00:14:05.67\00:14:07.58
my wife always told
me, she said, Jamel,
00:14:07.61\00:14:09.38
you speak quite
well, you can communicate.
00:14:09.41\00:14:11.25
She said, I think you would
be an outstanding chaplain.
00:14:11.28\00:14:13.98
So kind of put
it off for a year.
00:14:14.02\00:14:15.75
And by God's grace kind
of submitted an application
00:14:15.78\00:14:18.65
and the individual
contacted me within 24 hours.
00:14:18.69\00:14:21.79
And that led to a residency
at St. Joseph Hospital,
00:14:21.82\00:14:25.16
here in the city.
00:14:25.19\00:14:26.53
All right.
00:14:26.56\00:14:27.90
And it has been
truly a blessing to work
00:14:27.93\00:14:29.86
in that venue,
truly amazing blessing.
00:14:29.90\00:14:32.70
That's a blessing.
00:14:32.73\00:14:34.87
Let's talk to young
couples who are dating.
00:14:34.90\00:14:38.01
What are some of the
things they need to look at
00:14:38.04\00:14:40.51
and prepare before
contemplating marriage?
00:14:40.54\00:14:43.11
Yeah, yeah.
00:14:43.14\00:14:44.48
First and
foremost, know who you are.
00:14:44.51\00:14:46.38
I think that's important.
00:14:46.41\00:14:47.78
Figure out who you
are on your history
00:14:47.82\00:14:50.75
in reference to your family.
00:14:50.79\00:14:52.49
What were you exposed to,
00:14:52.52\00:14:54.19
which is very important
because what we don't realize
00:14:54.22\00:14:56.09
is that we carry that
over into the relationship.
00:14:56.12\00:15:00.13
Pay attention to how the
person treats their mother,
00:15:00.16\00:15:02.70
their father their responses.
00:15:02.73\00:15:05.43
If you guys have a disagreement,
00:15:05.47\00:15:07.80
what about their body language?
00:15:07.84\00:15:09.37
Or you know, are they a person
00:15:09.40\00:15:10.74
who can forgive?
00:15:10.77\00:15:12.24
Or do they kind
of hold on to things?
00:15:12.27\00:15:14.94
Those are very important,
00:15:14.98\00:15:16.31
especially if you're
talking about courting
00:15:16.34\00:15:17.68
and marrying someone.
00:15:17.71\00:15:19.31
I like the word courting.
00:15:19.35\00:15:21.28
Because we've
gotten away you know,
00:15:21.32\00:15:23.42
I mean, dating is fun.
00:15:23.45\00:15:24.85
But, you know, I
enjoyed being courted,
00:15:24.89\00:15:27.82
Arthur courted me.
00:15:27.86\00:15:29.46
Pick me up at my door.
00:15:29.49\00:15:32.19
Open my door for me.
00:15:32.23\00:15:34.36
Pull my chair out
at the restaurant.
00:15:34.40\00:15:36.77
Put my napkin over my lap.
00:15:36.80\00:15:39.70
I was like, I love that.
00:15:39.73\00:15:42.67
Would you like
me to order for you?
00:15:42.70\00:15:45.54
I recommend this on the menu.
00:15:45.57\00:15:48.44
Just amazing courtship.
00:15:48.48\00:15:51.18
Even the way he
spoke on the phone.
00:15:51.21\00:15:53.31
You hang up first.
No, you hang up first.
00:15:53.35\00:15:55.35
And you know, we're both sleepy.
00:15:55.38\00:15:57.19
But no, I'm not
gonna hang up on you,
00:15:57.22\00:15:58.95
because you'll never
say I hung up on you.
00:15:58.99\00:16:00.86
Exactly. Yeah,
'cause we will do that.
00:16:00.89\00:16:02.66
You hung up on me, you know,
but I asked you to hang up.
00:16:02.69\00:16:05.66
No. So that courtship
and relationship is crucial.
00:16:05.69\00:16:11.47
But we're in
this fast modality now
00:16:11.50\00:16:14.20
that we meet someone.
00:16:14.24\00:16:15.94
We get to know them and
you just saw our family.
00:16:15.97\00:16:18.61
And we're
walking down the aisle.
00:16:18.64\00:16:20.51
But we missed all the
premarital counseling,
00:16:20.54\00:16:23.91
the spirituality,
00:16:23.95\00:16:25.35
really that family origin piece?
00:16:25.38\00:16:27.65
Of course, I need to know,
00:16:27.68\00:16:29.02
I want to go to
your family reunion.
00:16:29.05\00:16:30.72
I need to see
where you come from.
00:16:30.75\00:16:32.42
Yes. And I'm serious about that.
00:16:32.45\00:16:34.89
I need to go to church with you,
00:16:34.92\00:16:37.03
attend church with you.
00:16:37.06\00:16:38.56
I need to be with
you at Sabbath dinners
00:16:38.59\00:16:41.30
and be around you.
00:16:41.33\00:16:42.66
But if you are not in
tune with that person,
00:16:42.70\00:16:46.70
you're going to
miss it and it will,
00:16:46.74\00:16:48.47
you will have to
pay later, you know?
00:16:48.50\00:16:51.67
How do you court
your wife? You know what?
00:16:51.71\00:16:54.01
Pretty much some of
the things that you said
00:16:54.04\00:16:55.71
one of the things
that I love to do is always
00:16:55.74\00:16:57.65
compliment my wife.
00:16:57.68\00:16:59.01
My wife is a
very beautiful person.
00:16:59.05\00:17:00.38
Yes, she is.
Yes, lovely dresser.
00:17:00.42\00:17:02.62
Yeah, lovely
dresser, beautiful character,
00:17:02.65\00:17:05.35
beautiful smile.
00:17:05.39\00:17:07.42
As we go out opening the
door, pulling out her chair.
00:17:07.46\00:17:11.59
Hun, is it anything
that I can do for you today?
00:17:11.63\00:17:13.60
As a matter of fact,
she comes home sometimes
00:17:13.63\00:17:15.56
she has her favorite slippers.
00:17:15.60\00:17:17.03
Her slippers are
there at the door for her.
00:17:17.07\00:17:19.10
So just making sure
that she's nurtured.
00:17:19.13\00:17:21.20
Appreciate it.
00:17:21.24\00:17:22.57
But most of all
that her hubby loves her.
00:17:22.60\00:17:24.21
You cook? I do cook.
00:17:24.24\00:17:25.87
What do you cook? Oh, stop it.
00:17:25.91\00:17:27.48
You know, lasagna. My
parents taught me well.
00:17:27.51\00:17:31.78
From scratch? From
scratch. Absolutely.
00:17:31.81\00:17:33.85
Yeah. No way. Mac and cheese.
00:17:33.88\00:17:35.25
Come on now. No way.
00:17:35.28\00:17:36.62
Yes, we did. You do greens?
00:17:36.65\00:17:37.99
I can do greens but I
need a little help there.
00:17:38.02\00:17:41.29
Absolutely.
00:17:41.32\00:17:42.66
Does she fix her special
dishes from the island for you?
00:17:42.69\00:17:47.83
You know what? I've
come to love some of them.
00:17:47.86\00:17:51.37
Some of them.
00:17:51.40\00:17:52.73
I'm still
working my way through,
00:17:52.77\00:17:54.10
but she will cook them.
00:17:54.14\00:17:55.64
Are they spicy? You know what?
00:17:55.67\00:17:57.47
She doesn't like
a lot of spicy food.
00:17:57.51\00:17:58.84
I don't need that.
I don't like spicy.
00:17:58.87\00:18:00.21
Yeah. So they're not spicy.
00:18:00.24\00:18:01.58
But she likes a
lot of the plantings.
00:18:01.61\00:18:02.94
I don't do the
planting. Oh, I love planting.
00:18:02.98\00:18:04.31
I love them. Yeah.
00:18:04.35\00:18:05.68
They're
delicious. You like that?
00:18:05.71\00:18:07.68
With the flavor and the texture?
00:18:07.72\00:18:09.22
Yeah, yeah.
00:18:09.25\00:18:10.59
Okay, so you don't like bananas?
00:18:10.62\00:18:12.05
Oh, I love bananas, but
just don't like them fry.
00:18:12.09\00:18:16.42
Okay. Yeah.
00:18:16.46\00:18:17.79
Commitment to God.
00:18:17.83\00:18:19.96
You know, what
should God be in our lives?
00:18:20.00\00:18:23.67
God should be
everything in our lives.
00:18:23.70\00:18:26.50
And that kind of sounds cliche.
00:18:26.53\00:18:29.30
But again, it has to start
with the relationship first.
00:18:29.34\00:18:33.11
You know as I oftentimes preach,
00:18:33.14\00:18:34.48
we can't have the horizontal
00:18:34.51\00:18:36.41
without having
the vertical first.
00:18:36.44\00:18:38.15
All right. You
know, that's important.
00:18:38.18\00:18:39.81
You have to be
committed to something or you
00:18:39.85\00:18:42.45
will be committed
to something else.
00:18:42.48\00:18:44.09
So you have to take the
time out to really explore,
00:18:44.12\00:18:47.52
let your fingers do the
walking for the scriptures.
00:18:47.56\00:18:50.09
Allow it to speak
to you personally.
00:18:50.13\00:18:51.46
Yeah.
00:18:51.49\00:18:52.83
Oftentimes tell us I'm teaching.
00:18:52.86\00:18:54.20
Don't just read the Bible,
00:18:54.23\00:18:55.63
but allow it to
speak to you personally.
00:18:55.66\00:18:58.60
And then God will become that
important part of your life.
00:18:58.63\00:19:02.40
I changed my name, I
put my name in scriptures.
00:19:02.44\00:19:05.07
You know, Kim,
00:19:05.11\00:19:06.44
faith is the
substance of things hoped for,
00:19:06.47\00:19:08.81
evidence of things not seen.
00:19:08.84\00:19:10.35
Kim, the Lord is your shepherd,
00:19:10.38\00:19:12.48
you know, and He will protect me
00:19:12.51\00:19:15.42
and Kim, He's is not
giving you a spirit of fear,
00:19:15.45\00:19:17.85
but of power and a sound mind.
00:19:17.89\00:19:20.36
And Kim, you can do all things
00:19:20.39\00:19:22.26
through Christ
who strengthens you.
00:19:22.29\00:19:23.99
Because that's His promise.
00:19:24.03\00:19:25.36
Of course.
00:19:25.39\00:19:26.73
How do we lean on
the promises of God?
00:19:26.76\00:19:29.60
You know what?
00:19:29.63\00:19:30.97
You have to record
scripture to memory.
00:19:31.00\00:19:32.83
And what what's better to
have in life than experiences?
00:19:32.87\00:19:37.81
Promises come
through experience,
00:19:37.84\00:19:39.64
you know, hardship,
trials, tribulation.
00:19:39.67\00:19:41.71
Yes.
00:19:41.74\00:19:43.11
Being unemployed, or
as I would often say,
00:19:43.14\00:19:45.51
when you get that letter
in the mail that has the red
00:19:45.55\00:19:47.42
writing on it, you know,
00:19:47.45\00:19:49.08
you have to have
some sense of faith.
00:19:49.12\00:19:50.99
You know, as you said,
God will never leave me
00:19:51.02\00:19:52.79
nor forsake me.
00:19:52.82\00:19:54.16
Sanctify them with
truth, thy word is true.
00:19:54.19\00:19:55.86
Yes.
00:19:55.89\00:19:57.23
You have to record that
and you have to walk in it,
00:19:57.26\00:19:59.29
but most importantly,
Kim, James says what?
00:19:59.33\00:20:02.63
Undefiled, not undefiled,
but unstable man what?
00:20:02.66\00:20:05.80
Is unstable.
00:20:05.83\00:20:07.34
A man's
unstable in all his ways.
00:20:07.37\00:20:08.94
All his ways, absolutely.
00:20:08.97\00:20:10.31
James 1:8. Yes. Absolutely.
00:20:10.34\00:20:11.71
So you have to not only
say it, you have to confirm it,
00:20:11.74\00:20:15.64
walk in it, but believe it.
00:20:15.68\00:20:17.95
And I think that's a challenge
for many of us in these days,
00:20:17.98\00:20:20.38
especially in the context
00:20:20.42\00:20:22.02
of this 21st
century that we live in.
00:20:22.05\00:20:23.85
It has to be intimacy with God.
00:20:23.89\00:20:25.72
Intimacy, that's what I
was getting ready to go,
00:20:25.75\00:20:27.19
you gotta have a
romance with God.
00:20:27.22\00:20:28.86
Oh, yes, yeah.
00:20:28.89\00:20:30.23
You know, he, I've
learned since Arthur's passing,
00:20:30.26\00:20:32.76
that I have a romance
with Him, I cry with Him.
00:20:32.79\00:20:36.93
I talk to Him, I lean on Him.
00:20:36.97\00:20:39.83
You know, I was
having church on the way
00:20:39.87\00:20:41.77
here to my office
today, just praising Him,
00:20:41.80\00:20:44.87
thanking Him that I was
able to get on the freeway,
00:20:44.91\00:20:47.98
and He opened up a path
for me to be able to get here
00:20:48.01\00:20:51.18
and I thank the Lord.
00:20:51.21\00:20:52.65
I want to go back to context.
00:20:52.68\00:20:54.42
Yes.
00:20:54.45\00:20:55.78
The way people
interpret the Bible,
00:20:55.82\00:20:57.15
you may see a scripture one way,
00:20:57.19\00:20:59.52
I see it another way.
00:20:59.55\00:21:01.06
But the bottom line, the truth,
00:21:01.09\00:21:03.02
how do we bring people
in alignment with the Word
00:21:03.06\00:21:05.76
of God without being offensive?
00:21:05.79\00:21:07.70
You know, what, Kim, one of my
mentors oftentimes told me like
00:21:07.73\00:21:10.07
when you're reading the text,
you have to have a little bit
00:21:10.10\00:21:11.93
of common sense.
00:21:11.97\00:21:13.37
You know, you have to
start with what is true first.
00:21:13.40\00:21:17.51
And the Bible says
in the beginning was,
00:21:17.54\00:21:19.24
you know, the
Word and Word was God.
00:21:19.27\00:21:20.98
So you have to
really believe that,
00:21:21.01\00:21:23.35
study it.
00:21:23.38\00:21:24.71
But most of all, go a
little bit more deeper.
00:21:24.75\00:21:27.28
Because I've had the
theological training,
00:21:27.32\00:21:29.58
I can deal with semantics,
00:21:29.62\00:21:31.39
I know the history
behind certain things.
00:21:31.42\00:21:33.82
A lot of
individuals may not know that.
00:21:33.86\00:21:35.62
So you get you a
good Bible dictionary.
00:21:35.66\00:21:37.69
Okay.
00:21:37.73\00:21:39.06
Get you some tools, as
one of my mentors would say,
00:21:39.09\00:21:40.96
a true pastor has
to have his to tools.
00:21:41.00\00:21:43.30
Yes.
00:21:43.33\00:21:44.67
So study to show
thyself approved.
00:21:44.70\00:21:46.30
Don't just be a surface reader.
00:21:46.33\00:21:48.07
But dig in the Word of God,
00:21:48.10\00:21:50.07
you know, find out
what certain words mean.
00:21:50.11\00:21:52.07
You don't necessarily have
to do the Greek or the Hebrew.
00:21:52.11\00:21:54.64
Yes.
00:21:54.68\00:21:56.01
But try to see what that means
00:21:56.04\00:21:57.38
in the context of a
theological standpoint,
00:21:57.41\00:21:59.28
as opposed to just reading
your traditional dictionary.
00:21:59.31\00:22:01.92
Now, listen, I
gotta be honest right now.
00:22:01.95\00:22:05.25
Doc Kim will be honest.
00:22:05.29\00:22:07.19
I love my Sabbath School lesson.
00:22:07.22\00:22:09.12
That's what we read
and study to help us
00:22:09.16\00:22:11.56
have more understanding
of the Word of God.
00:22:11.59\00:22:14.36
As Sabbath
School can be anywhere
00:22:14.40\00:22:15.80
between 9:15 or 11:30.
00:22:15.83\00:22:19.63
Some churches, which 11 o'clock
hour have Sabbath School,
00:22:19.67\00:22:23.20
but it's a time for us to
come together to fellowship
00:22:23.24\00:22:25.77
and study the Word of God.
00:22:25.81\00:22:27.84
Now, the other day,
00:22:27.88\00:22:29.58
Dr. Kim, had to
pull out her dictionary.
00:22:29.61\00:22:33.15
I'm like, okay, I'm reading
my Sabbath School lesson.
00:22:33.18\00:22:37.05
And I had about eight
words, I did not know.
00:22:37.09\00:22:40.42
Let me tell you, my
vocabulary has increased
00:22:40.46\00:22:45.79
in the years I've been
doing my Sabbath School lesson.
00:22:45.83\00:22:49.23
I mean, I have
words that I can use,
00:22:49.26\00:22:52.97
you know, I use a couple
of in my counseling session.
00:22:53.00\00:22:55.60
Now I'm like, and I said,
00:22:55.64\00:22:56.97
do you
understand what I'm saying?
00:22:57.01\00:22:58.34
They said, No.
00:22:58.37\00:22:59.71
And, but every morning
00:22:59.74\00:23:01.38
when I studied my
Sabbath School lesson,
00:23:01.41\00:23:03.58
do you know the Lord said,
00:23:03.61\00:23:04.95
I'll bring all things
back to your remembrance?
00:23:04.98\00:23:06.61
Yes.
00:23:06.65\00:23:07.98
I use something from
that lesson every time I said,
00:23:08.02\00:23:10.59
thank You, Jesus.
00:23:10.62\00:23:12.05
Thank You.
00:23:12.09\00:23:13.42
So we need to sit
and that's that I learned
00:23:13.46\00:23:15.56
that scripture first.
00:23:15.59\00:23:17.03
2 Timothy 3:16, study
to show thyself approved
00:23:17.06\00:23:20.73
a workman that
need not be shame,
00:23:20.76\00:23:22.70
rightly dividing
the world of truth.
00:23:22.73\00:23:24.27
Yes.
00:23:24.30\00:23:25.63
So we need to
come together in truth,
00:23:25.67\00:23:27.90
be able to find balance.
00:23:27.94\00:23:29.74
Why do you
recommend that you know,
00:23:29.77\00:23:32.47
being unequally yoked.
00:23:32.51\00:23:34.28
You wanted to marry a
Seventh-day Adventist?
00:23:34.31\00:23:36.18
Yes.
00:23:36.21\00:23:37.55
You know, that
was nonnegotiable.
00:23:37.58\00:23:39.51
You were not going to
marry outside the faith.
00:23:39.55\00:23:41.42
Not at all. Tell me why?
00:23:41.45\00:23:43.08
Because it's
important to for your spiritual,
00:23:43.12\00:23:45.85
mental and physically,
00:23:45.89\00:23:47.72
you want to make sure
that what's stated in the Word
00:23:47.76\00:23:50.99
applies to you, God
has given us a template,
00:23:51.03\00:23:53.40
God doesn't want us to entertain
00:23:53.43\00:23:55.23
certain things in the world.
00:23:55.26\00:23:56.60
And what happens
is that initially,
00:23:56.63\00:23:58.37
you will either be
drawn closer to your spouse,
00:23:58.40\00:24:01.27
or further away,
because what we fail to realize
00:24:01.30\00:24:03.71
is that our spouse has
an impact on our lives.
00:24:03.74\00:24:06.57
And certain things I
just wasn't going to have,
00:24:06.61\00:24:08.84
I don't want to
get up in the morning,
00:24:08.88\00:24:10.51
and the television
is on, because the way
00:24:10.55\00:24:12.58
that I was raised,
you don't watch television
00:24:12.61\00:24:14.18
on the Sabbath.
00:24:14.22\00:24:15.55
You know, I want to make sure
that there are certain things
00:24:15.58\00:24:17.39
in place that we
have a commonality with,
00:24:17.42\00:24:20.02
that I don't have to argue with,
00:24:20.06\00:24:21.72
you know, and I thought
that was very important.
00:24:21.76\00:24:23.46
And so matter of
fact, Paul talks about it
00:24:23.49\00:24:25.43
in 1 Corinthians,
00:24:25.46\00:24:26.80
so you definitely
want to make sure that you
00:24:26.83\00:24:28.83
do that because it's
critical to your wellbeing.
00:24:28.86\00:24:31.93
But they say to you,
Elder Dorsett, I love him.
00:24:31.97\00:24:35.44
I love her. We'll be all right.
00:24:35.47\00:24:37.74
What's your response?
00:24:37.77\00:24:39.11
And you know what,
Kim, Paul often talks about
00:24:39.14\00:24:41.34
how if the wife is
married to the husband,
00:24:41.38\00:24:44.35
that the wife, the
husband will be sanctified
00:24:44.38\00:24:46.92
through the wife and vice versa.
00:24:46.95\00:24:48.55
As some of us have
done things in a way
00:24:48.58\00:24:51.75
that that God understands,
but at the same time,
00:24:51.79\00:24:55.22
we have to realize
what He wanted us to do
00:24:55.26\00:24:57.56
from the beginning.
00:24:57.59\00:24:58.93
So if a couple has already
married out of their faith.
00:24:58.96\00:25:01.36
God is not saying that
you divorce that person.
00:25:01.40\00:25:03.83
As a matter of
fact, He's saying,
00:25:03.87\00:25:05.20
if the two
chooses to be together,
00:25:05.23\00:25:07.30
that they could be together,
00:25:07.34\00:25:08.80
but God holds us responsible
00:25:08.84\00:25:10.64
for the things that we know.
00:25:10.67\00:25:12.34
And right off the bat,
00:25:12.37\00:25:13.71
I knew that it
was important for me
00:25:13.74\00:25:15.84
not to be unequally yoked,
00:25:15.88\00:25:17.45
because God wants me to
be blessed above and beyond
00:25:17.48\00:25:20.98
not to have certain things
00:25:21.02\00:25:22.42
or to deal with certain things
00:25:22.45\00:25:23.79
that I should not
have to deal with,
00:25:23.82\00:25:25.49
if I would have just
been obedient to the spirit.
00:25:25.52\00:25:27.62
And I felt the same
way when I met Arthur.
00:25:27.66\00:25:29.76
And our first date was
I invited him to church.
00:25:29.79\00:25:34.40
And from that day
forward, he was sight.
00:25:34.43\00:25:38.13
When he walked in. He
said, what are they doing?
00:25:38.17\00:25:40.67
And I was like,
what, what, you know,
00:25:40.70\00:25:42.47
we take it for granted,
00:25:42.50\00:25:43.84
because we were in
church every weekend,
00:25:43.87\00:25:45.74
and we should be
in Sabbath School.
00:25:45.77\00:25:47.68
You know, I'm Sabbath
School superintendent,
00:25:47.71\00:25:49.44
so I'm there one of them.
00:25:49.48\00:25:51.25
But he said, what is
this that's going on?
00:25:51.28\00:25:53.45
And I said, it's Sabbath School.
00:25:53.48\00:25:55.52
He said, what is Sabbath School?
00:25:55.55\00:25:57.49
And I told him what it was,
00:25:57.52\00:25:59.05
they took him to
the beginner's class.
00:25:59.09\00:26:01.32
Three and a half
months later, he was baptized.
00:26:01.36\00:26:04.53
And then three and a
half, three years later,
00:26:04.56\00:26:06.59
we were married, but
I was not going to marry
00:26:06.63\00:26:09.50
out of the faith
be unequally yoked,
00:26:09.53\00:26:12.37
and understand it because
he was used to watching TV
00:26:12.40\00:26:14.90
on Saturday
playing golf Friday night.
00:26:14.94\00:26:17.97
And you know, he
told me one night he says,
00:26:18.01\00:26:19.71
I love the Sabbath.
00:26:19.74\00:26:21.41
He looked forward
to it because he said,
00:26:21.44\00:26:23.88
just rest and every...
00:26:23.91\00:26:26.18
Do you know, every week
we watch the Bible stories.
00:26:26.21\00:26:30.02
He says, Oh, well
tell me about Moses.
00:26:30.05\00:26:32.79
Tell me about Esther.
00:26:32.82\00:26:34.16
Who was Ruth?
Because he didn't know.
00:26:34.19\00:26:37.03
And so I would be like, boy,
00:26:37.06\00:26:39.26
if you don't let me go to sleep?
00:26:39.29\00:26:40.66
No, no, no. Tell
me about Jeremiah?
00:26:40.70\00:26:42.76
Who was King Jehoshaphat?
00:26:42.80\00:26:44.53
And I'm like,
really, really right now.
00:26:44.57\00:26:47.54
And we go to church,
00:26:47.57\00:26:48.90
and the sermon was
on King Jehoshaphat.
00:26:48.94\00:26:51.21
He will be there
like, yes, you know,
00:26:51.24\00:26:53.68
and his one of his favorite
scriptures for the battle
00:26:53.71\00:26:56.21
is not mine, it is the Lord.
00:26:56.24\00:26:59.08
He memorized that,
2 Chronicles 20:15,
00:26:59.11\00:27:03.75
he loved it.
00:27:03.79\00:27:05.12
You understand.
00:27:05.15\00:27:06.49
So in our last minute,
00:27:06.52\00:27:07.86
what can you say to us
00:27:07.89\00:27:09.32
to better our relationship
and commitment to God?
00:27:09.36\00:27:11.89
You want to be, you want to
be open and honest with God.
00:27:11.93\00:27:14.86
God knows everything about
us. He knows that we're sinners.
00:27:14.90\00:27:17.40
He knows that we're flawed.
00:27:17.43\00:27:18.97
But He did what
He had to do for us
00:27:19.00\00:27:20.77
what on the cross.
00:27:20.80\00:27:22.54
So the cross sets the template
00:27:22.57\00:27:24.21
for where you and I
need to go from here.
00:27:24.24\00:27:26.11
And Christ knew that
by His selfless sacrifice,
00:27:26.14\00:27:29.11
that we would what?
00:27:29.14\00:27:30.48
Become whole.
00:27:30.51\00:27:31.85
So we do that by
committing ourselves to Him,
00:27:31.88\00:27:34.18
talking to Him
open and honestly,
00:27:34.22\00:27:36.62
because He knows all things.
00:27:36.65\00:27:37.99
I don't think it's anything
that we can hide from God.
00:27:38.02\00:27:40.86
And as long as you
and I continue to do that,
00:27:40.89\00:27:43.19
but at the same time,
00:27:43.22\00:27:44.66
grow in our
relationship with Him.
00:27:44.69\00:27:46.46
God doesn't want
us to be stagnant.
00:27:46.49\00:27:48.40
As a matter of fact, he wants us
00:27:48.43\00:27:49.76
to progress and grow,
00:27:49.80\00:27:51.23
and it's physically,
mentally and spiritually.
00:27:51.27\00:27:54.47
So as we continue to
dive in the Word of God
00:27:54.50\00:27:57.37
to confess our sins before Him
00:27:57.41\00:27:58.91
but 1 John 1:9 says what?
00:27:58.94\00:28:01.81
He is faithful and just
to forgive not some, Dr. Kim,
00:28:01.84\00:28:05.21
but all.
00:28:05.25\00:28:06.58
And when we do that,
00:28:06.61\00:28:07.95
we grow into grace
of our Lord and Savior.
00:28:07.98\00:28:09.62
Well, I think he said it all.
00:28:09.65\00:28:11.55
I want to thank
you for being with us
00:28:11.59\00:28:13.05
on Live To Be Well.
00:28:13.09\00:28:14.42
Elder Dorsett,
00:28:14.46\00:28:15.79
Live To Be Well.
00:28:15.82\00:28:17.16
I'm Dr. Kim. God bless.
00:28:17.19\00:28:18.73