Hi, I'm Dr. Kim 00:00:35.76\00:00:37.17 and welcome to Live to be Well. 00:00:37.20\00:00:39.27 Today on our Program, 00:00:39.33\00:00:40.87 we're going to be talking about: Positive Reflections. 00:00:40.90\00:00:44.24 I want to welcome my guest today, Ki'Rah Tyus, welcome. 00:00:44.27\00:00:47.58 Hi, thank you for having me. 00:00:47.61\00:00:49.18 Oh, my little baby, 00:00:49.21\00:00:51.15 I should let them know that I met you 00:00:51.18\00:00:53.42 when you were just four years old 00:00:53.45\00:00:55.68 and you were a part of our 00:00:55.72\00:00:57.39 "God's Hands of Praise" Sign Language Choir... 00:00:57.42\00:00:59.75 and you and your sister, 00:00:59.79\00:01:01.66 so how are you? 00:01:01.69\00:01:03.49 I'm doing good, everything is good, 00:01:03.53\00:01:05.69 can't complain about nothing now. 00:01:05.73\00:01:07.83 You know what? Wouldn't change anything 00:01:07.86\00:01:09.36 because everything's in God's hands. 00:01:09.40\00:01:10.73 Yes Ma'am. 00:01:10.77\00:01:12.10 You know, you're just another old soul 00:01:12.13\00:01:13.97 I have to say, all right, 00:01:14.00\00:01:15.70 so, oh, something just recently happened, what happened? 00:01:15.74\00:01:18.64 Recently happened... 00:01:18.67\00:01:20.01 I had my conference with my girls' group... 00:01:20.04\00:01:21.98 Infinity Girls... it was called The Free Indeed Conference 00:01:22.01\00:01:24.51 and we just basically talked about 00:01:24.55\00:01:26.55 increasing your relationship with God 00:01:26.58\00:01:28.52 and how important it is to keep yourself until marriage 00:01:28.55\00:01:31.49 and knowing your self-worth so it was an awesome time, 00:01:31.55\00:01:34.39 the ladies were... they were blessed with the conference 00:01:34.42\00:01:37.23 and everything... it was just really good... 00:01:37.26\00:01:39.59 people were saying, "I'm so excited about next year" 00:01:39.63\00:01:42.13 so, we're in the process of planning for next year 00:01:42.16\00:01:44.67 but other than that, it was awesome... 00:01:44.70\00:01:46.60 I'm very satisfied for what God did for my first one, 00:01:46.63\00:01:50.21 it was our first one... so it was awesome. 00:01:50.24\00:01:52.37 It was awesome... now you also recently 00:01:52.41\00:01:54.61 graduated with your Associate's Degree. 00:01:54.64\00:01:56.61 Yes ma'am. 00:01:56.64\00:01:57.98 Let's talk about that and what was your field of study? 00:01:58.01\00:02:00.32 Okay, so, I did go to the Community College first, 00:02:00.38\00:02:03.05 it's cheaper to go that way 00:02:03.25\00:02:04.59 than going straight to university. 00:02:04.62\00:02:05.95 I graduated from OCC with my Associate's in... 00:02:05.99\00:02:08.32 And that's Oakwood Community College. 00:02:08.36\00:02:09.79 Yes, Oakwood Community College 00:02:09.82\00:02:11.29 with my Associate's in Applied Arts 00:02:11.33\00:02:13.66 that just took care of all my prerequisites 00:02:13.70\00:02:16.00 for my Nursing School 00:02:16.03\00:02:17.43 because I want to get my Bachelor of Science in Nursing 00:02:17.47\00:02:19.70 and then, I would be going to Oakwood University 00:02:19.73\00:02:22.90 to get my Nurse Practitioner Degree. 00:02:22.94\00:02:24.27 So, you are interested in nursing, 00:02:24.31\00:02:26.07 why do you want to be a nurse? 00:02:26.11\00:02:28.14 Ever since, I was a young girl, 00:02:28.21\00:02:30.18 I've always wanted to be in the medical field 00:02:30.21\00:02:32.18 rather, it was helping animals... 00:02:32.21\00:02:33.58 I went from a Vet to a Pediatrician to NCC ideas... 00:02:33.62\00:02:36.95 whatever it was... it was always within the medical field 00:02:36.99\00:02:40.72 because I love helping people 00:02:40.76\00:02:42.49 and I love helping people feel better, 00:02:42.52\00:02:44.46 you know, so my mom owns a Daycare 00:02:44.49\00:02:46.19 and everything like that... 00:02:46.23\00:02:47.56 so, when the little kids would get hurt, I'm like, 00:02:47.60\00:02:49.60 "Send them to me... I want to make sure they're okay" 00:02:49.63\00:02:51.13 then I'd go ahead put a Band-Aid on it 00:02:51.17\00:02:52.97 but, "Okay, come see Dr. Ki'Rah" 00:02:53.00\00:02:55.84 I've always wanted to be that person 00:02:55.87\00:02:58.11 that people can come to and be like, 00:02:58.14\00:02:59.84 "I know that she can take care of me, 00:02:59.87\00:03:01.44 I know that she can make me feel better" 00:03:01.48\00:03:02.94 so, the field that I wanted to go into is nursing 00:03:02.98\00:03:05.48 because nurses are the ones that are usually... 00:03:05.51\00:03:07.75 are the ones like, face-to-face with people... 00:03:07.78\00:03:09.85 That's true... that's true. 00:03:09.88\00:03:11.22 and helping people making sure that they are okay 00:03:11.25\00:03:12.69 and taking care of everything so... 00:03:12.72\00:03:15.32 and a Nurse Practitioner is like the highest nurse 00:03:15.36\00:03:18.09 that you can go into and what not, so... 00:03:18.13\00:03:20.50 Does that require a Master's degree and everything? 00:03:20.53\00:03:23.70 Yes, so you will basically get you BS 00:03:23.77\00:03:25.90 and then you would go to Nurse Practitioner School 00:03:25.93\00:03:28.44 so, yeah, different segments or different places you can go. 00:03:28.47\00:03:33.27 I can work with the heart, diabetes... 00:03:33.31\00:03:35.34 it doesn't matter which field I want to go into, 00:03:35.41\00:03:37.41 pediatrics is where I will want to go to. 00:03:37.45\00:03:39.75 Okay, you love the children. 00:03:39.78\00:03:41.12 Yes, so, working like in Children's Hospital 00:03:41.15\00:03:42.88 or working in the Pediatrics office, 00:03:42.95\00:03:44.65 working with kids and their care. 00:03:44.69\00:03:46.35 Our topic today is: Positive Reflection 00:03:46.39\00:03:49.12 and we tend to look at our peers or family members... 00:03:49.16\00:03:55.26 our relationships... 00:03:55.33\00:03:56.87 who has been your positive reflection? 00:03:56.90\00:04:00.34 And I know you are a Christian young woman 00:04:00.37\00:04:03.77 and you tickle me when you say, "Ever since I was a young girl" 00:04:03.81\00:04:08.28 like you're 90 years old, all right, 00:04:08.31\00:04:10.58 I'm telling you... okay... 00:04:10.61\00:04:12.71 so, who do you reflect your character through 00:04:12.75\00:04:18.15 and let's talk about Jesus Christ first 00:04:18.22\00:04:21.19 and then your Godly parents. 00:04:21.22\00:04:24.09 Okay. Kim: All right. 00:04:24.13\00:04:25.66 So, I've always been in church all my life 00:04:25.69\00:04:28.83 I accepted Christ when I was around 3... 4 years old, 00:04:28.86\00:04:33.94 and it was a choice I made on my own... 00:04:33.97\00:04:35.37 I came to my dad and said, "Dad, I'm ready... 00:04:35.40\00:04:37.34 I want to know God more, I want to be a part of church more" 00:04:37.37\00:04:41.54 and everything like that 00:04:41.58\00:04:42.91 so, ever since I made that connection for myself, 00:04:42.94\00:04:46.28 I've always been trying to just know more about God 00:04:46.31\00:04:49.85 for myself, 00:04:49.88\00:04:51.22 it's not that my parents forced me, 00:04:51.25\00:04:52.92 it's not that someone was telling me, 00:04:52.95\00:04:54.49 "You have to be a part of the church" 00:04:54.52\00:04:55.92 even though I knew that was the right thing to do, 00:04:55.99\00:04:58.69 it was still my choice to make that decision. 00:04:58.73\00:05:01.43 and a positive... I always wanted to make sure 00:05:01.46\00:05:04.07 that wherever I go, people will see God in me first, 00:05:04.10\00:05:07.34 I don't want them to see Ki'Rah, 00:05:07.37\00:05:08.84 even when I pray, I say, 00:05:08.87\00:05:10.21 "God, decrease me so that you may increase in my life 00:05:10.24\00:05:13.38 so when people see me they see your light... 00:05:13.41\00:05:15.41 they see your grace... 00:05:15.44\00:05:16.78 they see your mercy upon my life" 00:05:16.81\00:05:18.45 and so I want... when people see me, 00:05:18.48\00:05:20.15 I want them, like, "What is on you, I want that" 00:05:20.18\00:05:21.92 you know, 00:05:21.95\00:05:23.28 and I want people to make sure they see me 00:05:23.32\00:05:25.12 so any decision that I make... anything that I say, 00:05:25.15\00:05:28.46 anything that I do, 00:05:28.49\00:05:29.82 I want to make sure that it is pleasing in God's eyes first 00:05:29.86\00:05:32.16 because at the end of the day, 00:05:32.19\00:05:33.53 I'm not here to please anyone else but Him, 00:05:33.56\00:05:36.93 I realized that at a young age. 00:05:36.97\00:05:38.77 Well, let me ask you this, that's a lot of pressure. 00:05:38.80\00:05:40.64 It is. 00:05:40.70\00:05:42.04 And you know, you have people looking at you 00:05:42.07\00:05:44.11 and it's like you're under a microscope 00:05:44.14\00:05:47.18 you can't make a mistake 00:05:47.21\00:05:48.88 and so, how do you deal with the challenges 00:05:48.94\00:05:52.21 or, that type of shifting where... 00:05:52.25\00:05:56.58 "All right, when I walk into a place... 00:05:56.62\00:05:59.02 or I'm in a place where people know who I am... " 00:05:59.05\00:06:01.19 it's like, "Okay... " 00:06:01.22\00:06:02.99 because if this is something you do every day, 24 hours a day... 00:06:03.02\00:06:06.39 then it's there in your character. 00:06:06.43\00:06:08.46 All right, so it doesn't come off, does it? 00:06:08.50\00:06:10.17 No. 00:06:10.20\00:06:11.53 Our walk with Christ should be with us at all times, all right, 00:06:11.57\00:06:15.47 so, what are the challenges you face 00:06:15.50\00:06:17.51 because you're 20 years old 00:06:17.54\00:06:19.51 you know, so, you're not into night clubs. 00:06:19.54\00:06:22.11 No. 00:06:22.14\00:06:23.48 You're not out there doing things, 00:06:23.51\00:06:25.08 you're still a virgin. 00:06:25.11\00:06:26.78 Yes, I am. 00:06:26.82\00:06:28.15 Yeah, all right, and you're proud of it. 00:06:28.18\00:06:30.69 I am... I am very proud of it because it's... 00:06:30.72\00:06:33.22 it's a... you don't find it in a lot of young women 00:06:33.25\00:06:36.46 now in our generation who hold that 00:06:36.49\00:06:39.09 and want to hold it 00:06:39.13\00:06:40.46 because they don't realize how important it is, 00:06:40.50\00:06:43.16 you only have it one time... you know... 00:06:43.20\00:06:44.77 so, why... you know... 00:06:44.80\00:06:46.84 why not wait until the one that God wants you to be with 00:06:46.87\00:06:49.50 for the rest of your life 00:06:49.54\00:06:50.87 but the pressure... and you know how I deal with that... 00:06:50.91\00:06:54.41 it's very... I mean it can get hard at times 00:06:54.44\00:06:58.85 because in our generation, it's all about judgment, 00:06:58.88\00:07:01.15 how you look... what you say... 00:07:01.18\00:07:03.35 who you hang out with... what do you do? 00:07:03.39\00:07:05.25 But I realize that 00:07:05.29\00:07:07.79 I don't really care what people think about me 00:07:07.82\00:07:11.33 as long as I know I'm good in God's eyes, 00:07:11.36\00:07:13.40 so, when I would go to school, I was always the one 00:07:13.43\00:07:16.53 that was like... by myself... 00:07:16.56\00:07:18.57 or I had very, very little friends 00:07:18.60\00:07:20.50 because everyone else wanted to do... 00:07:20.54\00:07:22.34 they wanted to smoke... they wanted to party... 00:07:22.37\00:07:24.84 they wanted to do things like that 00:07:24.87\00:07:26.54 and I'm like, "That's not in me... " 00:07:26.57\00:07:28.01 and if they try to put me in... 00:07:28.04\00:07:31.01 I'm like, "I don't even feel comfortable talking about it. " 00:07:31.08\00:07:33.88 So there was some peer pressure. 00:07:33.92\00:07:35.25 Yes, there was peer pressure, but when it happened, 00:07:35.28\00:07:38.39 I'm like, "I don't even feel comfortable, 00:07:38.42\00:07:40.12 I don't even feel right, it's not something that I... " 00:07:40.16\00:07:42.49 and I'm never ever going to do anything 00:07:42.52\00:07:44.66 that I don't feel right doing 00:07:44.69\00:07:46.49 and if it's not something that 00:07:46.53\00:07:48.26 will put a positive reflection on me, 00:07:48.33\00:07:50.77 or on a guy and my parents... 00:07:50.80\00:07:52.70 I'm not going to do it 00:07:52.73\00:07:54.07 because when people think about you, 00:07:54.10\00:07:56.71 first impression is everything 00:07:56.74\00:07:58.37 and you want to make sure that you leave a positive mark 00:07:58.41\00:08:00.74 and a positive... a positive look upon yourself 00:08:00.78\00:08:03.95 towards other people. 00:08:03.98\00:08:05.31 Because you can't change that, you know, 00:08:05.35\00:08:06.75 first impressions are lasting 00:08:06.78\00:08:08.52 and once they meet you as you walk through the door, 00:08:08.55\00:08:11.19 "Hi, how are you? It's nice to meet you. " 00:08:11.22\00:08:13.36 Yes ma'am. 00:08:13.39\00:08:14.72 So, that's my first impression 00:08:14.76\00:08:16.22 and I remember when you came 00:08:16.26\00:08:18.36 to my home for the first time 00:08:18.39\00:08:20.30 and I was like, 00:08:20.33\00:08:22.36 "What's going on with this little girl" 00:08:22.40\00:08:24.20 and your parents walked through my home 00:08:24.23\00:08:26.00 you looked everywhere... 00:08:26.03\00:08:27.37 and they were comfortable, they stayed for a few minutes 00:08:27.40\00:08:30.21 and it's like... they went out on a date night, all right, 00:08:30.24\00:08:33.14 left the two of you all with me, all right... and Elder Nowlin, 00:08:33.17\00:08:36.08 so, let's talk about how you present yourself in dress 00:08:36.14\00:08:41.82 because Society now says, 00:08:41.88\00:08:44.22 "We need to just be half naked. " 00:08:44.29\00:08:46.29 Right... 00:08:46.32\00:08:47.66 How would you dress, I mean, I look at you now 00:08:47.69\00:08:50.19 just beautifully dressed. 00:08:50.23\00:08:51.56 Yes ma'am, when I think about how I dress, 00:08:51.59\00:08:55.06 I always want to make sure that it's never too revealing 00:08:55.10\00:08:58.73 that it always holds up the standard of a young lady... 00:08:58.77\00:09:02.34 a young woman... 00:09:02.40\00:09:03.74 I don't want people to see me as... like a... 00:09:03.77\00:09:07.68 when people look at me, I want them to be like, 00:09:07.71\00:09:10.65 "That young lady has pride, 00:09:10.68\00:09:13.08 that young lady thinks well of herself, 00:09:13.11\00:09:15.25 that young lady takes care of herself... " 00:09:15.28\00:09:17.39 or "that young lady thinks that she is worth something" 00:09:17.42\00:09:20.29 because when you show your body 00:09:20.32\00:09:22.52 when you have shorts on that's too short 00:09:22.56\00:09:25.69 or when you have tube tops on and everything like that, 00:09:25.73\00:09:28.86 you're giving the... 00:09:28.90\00:09:30.27 you're not giving that feeling or wanting to like, 00:09:30.33\00:09:35.17 "I want to know more about her" you know what I'm saying? 00:09:35.20\00:09:37.61 Like, when you show your... when you show everything, 00:09:37.64\00:09:40.01 they're like, "That's how she is" 00:09:40.04\00:09:41.44 or, you know, like, they can just put on a type of... 00:09:41.48\00:09:44.01 they can think something about you 00:09:44.05\00:09:45.85 because you're showing everything to the world already. 00:09:45.88\00:09:48.48 They'll date you... men will date you... 00:09:48.52\00:09:51.09 "Oh, you look good... you're sexy... " 00:09:51.12\00:09:53.29 Right. 00:09:53.32\00:09:54.66 "You're this and that... " 00:09:54.69\00:09:56.02 but they won't take you home to meet their mother. 00:09:56.06\00:09:57.39 Right... 00:09:57.43\00:09:58.76 Because they know... 00:09:58.79\00:10:00.13 I wish my son would bring someone to my home 00:10:00.16\00:10:02.20 with some shorts on... and a tube top... 00:10:02.23\00:10:06.57 I'm like, "If you don't take her out of my house... " 00:10:06.60\00:10:08.47 Exactly... 00:10:08.50\00:10:09.84 But I want to be a Christian and I want to be... 00:10:09.87\00:10:11.74 maybe I can sit down and talk with her 00:10:11.77\00:10:13.24 and say, "Well, honey... I... " 00:10:13.27\00:10:15.38 I mean, I'd be like, "I can't get past the shorts" 00:10:15.41\00:10:17.48 I would... in my mind, 00:10:17.55\00:10:18.88 but I wouldn't say it, 00:10:18.91\00:10:20.25 "I will try to be very kind and nice" 00:10:20.28\00:10:22.38 but see... if you came to my home with my son, 00:10:22.42\00:10:25.79 I'd be like, "Hi... " 00:10:25.82\00:10:27.22 because again, first impressions are lasting, 00:10:27.26\00:10:29.92 what's going on with the natural look you got going on, 00:10:29.96\00:10:33.66 everyone is coming out of the press 00:10:33.70\00:10:35.33 and... what's going on? 00:10:35.36\00:10:36.77 Well, I always had thick hair 00:10:36.80\00:10:39.43 but I never realized how beautiful or how... 00:10:39.47\00:10:43.30 just everything about my hair is amazing to me, 00:10:43.34\00:10:47.11 I started being natural 2015 00:10:47.14\00:10:50.35 me and my sister did the same thing... the big chop... 00:10:50.38\00:10:52.78 I don't know if you heard of it yet 00:10:52.81\00:10:54.15 when you cut off like, all your natural... 00:10:54.18\00:10:55.78 all like your straight hair so, you know, 00:10:55.85\00:10:57.92 you wet your hair and what not, I used to like... 00:10:57.95\00:10:59.99 all your straight hair and you cut it off... 00:11:00.02\00:11:01.49 and I clipped off about three inches 00:11:01.52\00:11:03.26 and when I first did that, my hair was at my neck, 00:11:03.32\00:11:06.80 now, it's down my back, so... 00:11:06.83\00:11:08.56 but the thing about the natural hair 00:11:08.60\00:11:10.47 is just knowing... and knowing that you're beautiful 00:11:10.50\00:11:12.63 with your natural everything... 00:11:12.67\00:11:15.04 you know, so you know, 00:11:15.07\00:11:16.44 you don't have to wear the weave... 00:11:16.47\00:11:18.54 you don't have to wear... and it's not you... 00:11:18.57\00:11:20.88 this is me... everything about it is me 00:11:20.91\00:11:24.28 and I think, sometimes, women... 00:11:24.31\00:11:26.58 we tend to hide behind that 00:11:26.61\00:11:28.08 because we don't have the hair that we want 00:11:28.12\00:11:30.32 or we don't have the hair like the girl... 00:11:30.35\00:11:32.52 "Oh, she has the... the mixed hair" 00:11:32.55\00:11:34.69 whereas, it just lays perfectly 00:11:34.72\00:11:36.79 and I have the other hair where it doesn't cooperate" 00:11:36.83\00:11:39.56 and everything like that, 00:11:39.59\00:11:40.93 and... natural hair... it just allows you to realize 00:11:40.96\00:11:44.47 how beautiful you really are because this is your hair, 00:11:44.50\00:11:48.10 this is the hair that God gave you. 00:11:48.14\00:11:49.90 Back in the '70s way before you were born 00:11:49.94\00:11:52.81 I think, I might have been born, 00:11:52.87\00:11:55.41 and we... you know... 00:11:55.44\00:11:57.61 it was really about the movement of black people... 00:11:57.65\00:12:01.62 and the Afros... and everyone was really wearing the dashikis 00:12:01.65\00:12:07.72 and... oh, I didn't realize I said dashiki 00:12:07.76\00:12:10.13 that's really dating me here 00:12:10.16\00:12:12.06 and I was there when they went back there... 00:12:12.09\00:12:13.96 the African prince... 00:12:14.00\00:12:15.46 but it really gave us pride... it gave us a sense of well-being 00:12:15.53\00:12:20.24 and we would... I remember... I was in the 8th grade... 00:12:20.30\00:12:26.31 it was... for my 8th Grade Academy graduation... 00:12:26.34\00:12:29.44 my hair was straight, it was long 00:12:29.51\00:12:31.78 and I went with my girlfriend 00:12:31.81\00:12:33.82 and she was like, "You need to do an Afro" 00:12:33.85\00:12:36.22 didn't ask my mother anything... 00:12:36.25\00:12:37.89 when I came back, I had a short Afro, 00:12:37.92\00:12:40.26 my mother just... she didn't know what to say 00:12:40.29\00:12:43.63 and I... I had pride... I felt good... 00:12:43.66\00:12:47.86 I got my "pick" I was picking my Afro out... 00:12:47.90\00:12:51.70 and I think it lasted maybe about... 00:12:51.73\00:12:54.07 I think I had it about at least three years... 00:12:54.10\00:12:56.34 Wow! 00:12:56.37\00:12:57.71 I did... and I... I can appreciate it... 00:12:57.74\00:13:01.28 so, when I turn that golden years... 00:13:01.31\00:13:05.05 I'm not there yet, 00:13:05.08\00:13:06.41 I'm thinking about doing something au naturel 00:13:06.45\00:13:08.98 all right, and I can appreciate that 00:13:09.02\00:13:11.69 you know, 00:13:11.72\00:13:13.05 to give it a different perspective. 00:13:13.09\00:13:14.42 All right, let's talk about siblings. 00:13:14.46\00:13:15.96 Okay, I have an older sister, her name is Kiara... 00:13:15.99\00:13:19.13 I have a younger brother, his name is Christopher, 00:13:19.16\00:13:22.46 we're all very... we're close and everything... 00:13:22.50\00:13:25.70 my sister... we're a part of "God's Hands of Praise" 00:13:25.73\00:13:28.00 and then we left... we left and everything... 00:13:28.04\00:13:31.24 me and my sister... we both are in ministry... 00:13:31.27\00:13:34.44 I would say... we both are on fire for God, 00:13:34.48\00:13:37.25 we want to make sure that this generation understands 00:13:37.28\00:13:40.98 that it's okay to be "on fire" for God 00:13:41.02\00:13:43.82 and it's okay to love God and want to know more about Him, 00:13:43.85\00:13:47.72 you don't have to be ashamed of doing that... 00:13:47.76\00:13:49.82 and my little brother... he's in high school now... 00:13:49.89\00:13:52.89 I can't believe Christopher... he was a baby... 00:13:52.96\00:13:55.96 he was in my Sign Language Class yes, 00:13:56.00\00:13:58.70 I had the opportunity of watching social media 00:13:58.73\00:14:03.20 and you were doing the Program, Infinity Girls... 00:14:03.24\00:14:07.64 and I heard you pray 00:14:07.68\00:14:09.54 and it truly brought tears to my eyes 00:14:09.58\00:14:13.38 because of the love you have for Jesus 00:14:13.42\00:14:17.12 and the way you were ministering to these young girls 00:14:17.15\00:14:20.99 and what an example 00:14:21.02\00:14:22.62 and going back to about being a virgin... 00:14:22.66\00:14:25.69 because you talk about purity to the girls. 00:14:25.73\00:14:28.76 Why do you incorporate purity 00:14:28.80\00:14:30.80 and why is that important? 00:14:30.83\00:14:33.23 It's important because 00:14:33.27\00:14:35.64 God gives us that for one purpose... one purpose only 00:14:35.67\00:14:38.81 that's for union which is marriage, 00:14:38.84\00:14:40.58 it's not to be used... 00:14:40.61\00:14:42.01 or not to be abused... I would say 00:14:42.04\00:14:44.88 and just being whole and one... 00:14:44.91\00:14:47.35 it's so important in God's eyes 00:14:47.38\00:14:49.75 because you only get one body... 00:14:49.78\00:14:51.79 you only get one life... one temple 00:14:51.85\00:14:53.76 and you should want to take care of that temple 00:14:53.79\00:14:56.12 forever... 00:14:56.16\00:14:57.56 so, purity... is just not even... 00:14:57.63\00:15:00.93 not even having sex it's... 00:15:00.96\00:15:02.73 purity is not having sex... not drinking... not smoking... 00:15:02.76\00:15:05.77 not just doing anything harmful to your body 00:15:05.80\00:15:08.40 and it's important because 00:15:08.44\00:15:10.01 that's what God would want us to do. 00:15:10.04\00:15:11.64 He wouldn't want us to have it any other way. 00:15:11.67\00:15:13.81 We need to get back to that, 00:15:13.88\00:15:15.81 of knowing that I am worth something... 00:15:15.84\00:15:18.98 knowing that I am worth more than what you may think of me... 00:15:19.01\00:15:21.98 knowing that I am worth the wait... 00:15:22.02\00:15:23.89 so, if you're not willing to wait for me, 00:15:23.95\00:15:25.92 then you're not the one for me... 00:15:25.95\00:15:27.96 that's everything about purity... 00:15:27.99\00:15:29.96 it's no one respects you... 00:15:30.03\00:15:31.93 you need to respect yourself first. 00:15:31.96\00:15:34.00 As long as you respect yourself first, 00:15:34.03\00:15:35.96 then God is pleased with what you're doing, 00:15:36.00\00:15:38.37 so, no sex, no drinking... no smoking... 00:15:38.40\00:15:40.44 I haven't done none of that myself... 00:15:40.47\00:15:42.44 I'm very proud of that... 00:15:42.47\00:15:43.91 I'm not ashamed of it, 00:15:43.94\00:15:45.31 I will tell anyone in a heartbeat... "I am a virgin. " 00:15:45.34\00:15:48.48 Now, it can get hard at times because Satan can hear you 00:15:48.54\00:15:51.11 and he will want to try to make you fall 00:15:51.15\00:15:53.65 and he will want to try to make you 00:15:53.68\00:15:56.15 get off-track and everything 00:15:56.18\00:15:57.99 but you have to make sure that you stay in front of God... 00:15:58.02\00:16:00.52 seek His face... 00:16:00.56\00:16:01.89 and He will give you evidence you need, 00:16:01.92\00:16:03.83 when you're alone at night, 00:16:03.86\00:16:05.79 you're like, "God, you know, I need you" 00:16:05.83\00:16:08.16 just pray... it might be hard for us 00:16:08.20\00:16:10.50 as young women to do that 00:16:10.53\00:16:11.87 or it might be hard for us as this generation... 00:16:11.90\00:16:13.54 it's not, I guess, "Cool" to pray 00:16:13.57\00:16:15.50 or it's not cool to ask God, 00:16:15.57\00:16:17.67 it's not cool to be in God's face... 00:16:17.71\00:16:19.97 but we also have to realize that God is the One 00:16:20.01\00:16:24.05 who gives us everything that we have... 00:16:24.08\00:16:25.78 He gives us our life, health and strength, 00:16:25.81\00:16:27.45 so, we have to realize that whatever He needs from us 00:16:27.48\00:16:31.12 or whatever He wants from us, 00:16:31.15\00:16:32.49 we should be able to make that sacrifice 00:16:32.52\00:16:34.66 and give it to Him and... I guess I'll say, 00:16:34.69\00:16:37.03 "I'm proud to be a virgin, I'm proud to be pure, 00:16:37.06\00:16:39.63 and everything... " 00:16:39.69\00:16:41.03 and I'm not going to stop until I get the ring... 00:16:41.06\00:16:43.93 "If you like it, you must put a ring on it" 00:16:43.97\00:16:46.27 right... 00:16:46.30\00:16:47.77 All right, so do you have anything that causes you 00:16:47.80\00:16:51.54 fear... are you afraid of anything? 00:16:51.57\00:16:54.98 that would be presented to you, 00:16:55.01\00:16:58.41 like me, I'm afraid... 00:16:58.45\00:16:59.91 I will on get on roller coasters. 00:16:59.95\00:17:01.52 Really? I love roller coasters. 00:17:01.55\00:17:03.02 No, no, no, no, no... I... I made promise to the Lord... 00:17:03.08\00:17:05.95 I was 22 years old, 00:17:05.99\00:17:08.29 I said, "Lord, if you get me off this roller coaster alive, 00:17:08.32\00:17:12.89 I will never get back on one" 00:17:12.93\00:17:14.90 that was at 22... 00:17:14.93\00:17:16.50 And you never went back on. 00:17:16.53\00:17:17.87 Never... I hold purses, 00:17:17.90\00:17:19.23 I will hold everyone's purse, all right, 00:17:19.27\00:17:22.34 walk around... and just drink my water and keep it moving. 00:17:22.37\00:17:25.94 Keep it moving. 00:17:25.97\00:17:27.38 And just, "Hi... " and keep it moving 00:17:27.41\00:17:29.58 so, I don't do roller coasters, 00:17:29.61\00:17:31.48 I don't... I don't have a fear of snakes... 00:17:31.51\00:17:35.18 are you afraid of snakes? 00:17:35.22\00:17:36.55 I am... I guess it's different 00:17:36.58\00:17:40.16 because when I was in school... 00:17:40.19\00:17:43.76 elementary school... they had like this little petting zoo, 00:17:43.79\00:17:46.16 they would come... and they brought this big banana snake... 00:17:46.19\00:17:48.53 I'm like... "Ah... " 00:17:48.56\00:17:50.30 Did you put it around your neck? 00:17:50.33\00:17:51.67 Yes, I was like, "Oooh... " I was like, "Jesus... " 00:17:51.70\00:17:53.50 I was sitting here, I'm like, "Oh my God... " 00:17:53.54\00:17:57.01 they'll put the head on your knee, 00:17:57.04\00:17:58.37 they'll put the tail in your... 00:17:58.41\00:17:59.74 put it right in the middle where I don't want to touch it, 00:17:59.77\00:18:01.64 I mean, I wouldn't say... 00:18:01.68\00:18:03.55 it's a fear, I don't like... 00:18:03.58\00:18:05.35 But didn't it help you to overcome that a little bit? 00:18:05.41\00:18:08.52 It did... a little bit... 00:18:08.55\00:18:09.88 Confronted it... 00:18:09.92\00:18:11.25 I would never hold it by myself. 00:18:11.29\00:18:12.95 So, you would never buy a pet snake? 00:18:12.99\00:18:14.99 No... Kim: Okay, no... 00:18:15.02\00:18:16.36 If I ever bought any, like, exotic animal or anything... 00:18:16.39\00:18:20.80 I would probably buy a lizard, I would never get a snake. 00:18:20.86\00:18:25.30 Really? But that comes from the reptile family. 00:18:25.33\00:18:28.27 I mean, if I got anything, like, from within the reptile... 00:18:28.30\00:18:30.87 snake family... reptile family, I will only get a lizard, 00:18:30.91\00:18:34.38 I would not get nothing near a snake. 00:18:34.41\00:18:36.81 Okay, so, do you know how to cook? 00:18:36.85\00:18:39.15 Because a lot of our young people today, 00:18:39.18\00:18:40.52 don't know how to cook. 00:18:40.55\00:18:41.95 I had a patient last night and she doesn't know how to cook 00:18:41.98\00:18:45.35 so, I was doing recipes in my therapy session 00:18:45.39\00:18:47.99 because it was causing such anxiety for her and her mother 00:18:48.02\00:18:51.76 so, do you know how to cook? 00:18:51.79\00:18:53.80 Well, I would just say this, I do know how to cook 00:18:53.83\00:18:56.20 and I learned from my dad... my dad... he's the cook... yes. 00:18:56.23\00:18:59.83 Really? 00:18:59.87\00:19:01.20 Because my grandmother who passed a couple of months ago, 00:19:01.24\00:19:03.87 my grandmother... she was like the queen of cooking 00:19:03.91\00:19:07.88 so, I definitely learned how to cook 00:19:07.91\00:19:10.08 from watching my dad cooking Thanksgiving Dinner 00:19:10.11\00:19:12.48 or, you know, just cooking in the house most of the time... 00:19:12.51\00:19:15.58 so I know how to cook macaroni and cheese, 00:19:15.65\00:19:17.75 I know how to do some spaghetti sometimes, 00:19:17.79\00:19:19.89 you know, just like the small stuff. 00:19:19.92\00:19:22.56 Small things... you sound like Erin, okay. 00:19:22.59\00:19:24.69 This morning, I want to learn more 00:19:24.73\00:19:28.33 I want to know... know more about cooking and everything 00:19:28.36\00:19:31.63 because it's just healthier living. 00:19:31.67\00:19:33.60 Yes, so you like vegetables you eat fruit... lot of water... 00:19:33.64\00:19:37.34 Yes. 00:19:37.37\00:19:38.71 All right, do you work out... do you exercise? 00:19:38.74\00:19:40.21 I mean, right now, I do exercise in the summer time 00:19:40.24\00:19:43.98 but like, when school starts... it's... I have to balance that. 00:19:44.01\00:19:47.55 You have to balance that. 00:19:47.58\00:19:48.92 Because you have school... you may have 12-Credit classes 00:19:48.95\00:19:51.15 and then you have homework to do 00:19:51.19\00:19:53.05 and lean towards your job 00:19:53.09\00:19:54.42 so it's like... during the school year 00:19:54.46\00:19:56.06 I definitely had to... I know how to balance everything 00:19:56.09\00:20:00.80 so, I do work out and I could work out more... 00:20:00.83\00:20:03.20 Kim: Could work out more... 00:20:03.23\00:20:04.57 I could work out more... there's always room for improvement 00:20:04.60\00:20:06.23 and everything... 00:20:06.30\00:20:07.64 See this is that old soul in you all right, 00:20:07.70\00:20:10.64 and I'm just listening to you, you know, so let's... 00:20:10.67\00:20:14.44 dating... because with school and work and ministry, 00:20:14.48\00:20:18.01 is there anyone special you like 00:20:18.05\00:20:20.15 or you're just waiting for the Lord. 00:20:20.22\00:20:22.28 No... no... there is no... 00:20:22.32\00:20:24.45 You can tell me... all right, tell me... 00:20:24.52\00:20:26.82 nobody ever said, "No" all right. 00:20:26.86\00:20:28.19 No, there is no one special right now, 00:20:28.22\00:20:31.09 I'm not going to say that men have not... 00:20:31.13\00:20:34.00 oh, not men but young men... 00:20:34.06\00:20:35.70 young men have not tried to come into my life 00:20:35.73\00:20:38.83 and when there was that time, I'm just like, 00:20:38.87\00:20:41.84 "Okay God, show me who they really are" 00:20:41.87\00:20:44.77 I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone 00:20:44.81\00:20:48.04 who is not willing to increase their relationship with you, 00:20:48.11\00:20:52.35 anyone that I date or intend on dating 00:20:52.38\00:20:56.22 we have to be friends first, 00:20:56.25\00:20:58.09 I want to make sure that I'm dating my best friend... 00:20:58.12\00:21:00.59 I don't want to date anyone that I do not know 00:21:00.62\00:21:02.69 I don't want to date anyone who doesn't have... 00:21:02.72\00:21:04.76 or close to the same values that I have... 00:21:04.79\00:21:07.13 which is God first in everything that I do... 00:21:07.20\00:21:09.50 purity... I'm not having anything until I get married, 00:21:09.56\00:21:13.64 and just... education is very important to me as well. 00:21:13.67\00:21:16.67 If you are not educated 00:21:16.71\00:21:18.41 or if you're not trying to improve yourself 00:21:18.44\00:21:20.91 in where you are right now, 00:21:20.94\00:21:22.28 then, there's really no point of talking to me 00:21:22.31\00:21:25.68 because I'm not... 00:21:25.71\00:21:27.05 You're not taking care of a grown man. 00:21:27.08\00:21:28.42 No... I am not... ah... ah... 00:21:28.45\00:21:29.78 Your father... and I know your father... 00:21:29.82\00:21:31.15 he's not having it, all right. 00:21:31.19\00:21:32.52 Now, if you marry and something happens, 00:21:32.55\00:21:34.76 there's an accident... he's laid off work... 00:21:34.79\00:21:37.36 or a shift in the business or something 00:21:37.39\00:21:39.86 that's understandable. Ki'Rah: Yes. 00:21:39.89\00:21:41.40 You know, when I met Elder Nowlin, 00:21:41.43\00:21:42.86 he was working for an Agency and one day he came home 00:21:42.90\00:21:45.87 and he was looking very depressed... 00:21:45.90\00:21:48.14 I think he used it to manipulate me 00:21:48.17\00:21:50.34 and I said, "What's wrong?" 00:21:50.41\00:21:52.21 And he says, "I just quit my job. " 00:21:52.24\00:21:54.18 I said, "Really, we just bought a new house" 00:21:54.21\00:21:56.38 and he said, "But I just don't want to do this anymore, 00:21:56.41\00:22:00.12 I don't want to work at this Agency" 00:22:00.15\00:22:01.48 and I said, "Well, what do you want to do?" 00:22:01.52\00:22:03.75 And he said, "I want to get my Master's 00:22:03.79\00:22:06.02 and I want to get certified... 00:22:06.05\00:22:07.39 I want to get my Clinical Drug Test... 00:22:07.42\00:22:09.62 pass all of that... 00:22:09.66\00:22:11.13 and I said, "And then what?" 00:22:11.16\00:22:13.16 He said, "I want to come work with you. " 00:22:13.19\00:22:14.56 And I said, "Okay" 00:22:14.60\00:22:16.26 and I told him... I said, "If you leave me 00:22:16.30\00:22:18.97 after you get these degrees, 00:22:19.00\00:22:20.67 I will hunt you down all right" 00:22:20.70\00:22:22.30 and he went to school... knocked it out in a year... 00:22:22.34\00:22:25.91 I would take him, pick him up, fix his lunch... 00:22:25.97\00:22:28.34 and he graduated... he was so happy... 00:22:28.38\00:22:31.98 and he went on to get his license... 00:22:32.01\00:22:35.58 and certification... certification... certification 00:22:35.62\00:22:38.39 and we joined Practice together 00:22:38.45\00:22:41.62 until the day he passed we were one... 00:22:41.66\00:22:44.33 and I think that's very important 00:22:44.36\00:22:46.70 to be able to stand behind someone... 00:22:46.73\00:22:49.03 to believe in someone and I took a risk... 00:22:49.06\00:22:51.30 I took a major risk to say, "Okay, quit your job" 00:22:51.33\00:22:55.54 that meant that my finance... our finances... had to be right 00:22:55.57\00:22:59.47 and he said, "Well, Honey, you work all the time" 00:22:59.51\00:23:02.71 which I do... I love to work... 00:23:02.74\00:23:04.41 and I'm trying to balance it now, 00:23:04.45\00:23:06.05 I love helping people, but I had to say to myself, 00:23:06.08\00:23:10.05 "He is very sincere, 00:23:10.09\00:23:11.55 I don't believe He would leave me 00:23:11.59\00:23:13.12 and he would be here" 00:23:13.15\00:23:15.76 and he was... he gave everything he had 00:23:15.79\00:23:18.56 even to Dare to Dream... this broadcast. 00:23:18.59\00:23:21.70 Dating... what's a good age to date? 00:23:21.73\00:23:24.77 You did not want to know my answer to that 00:23:24.80\00:23:26.84 but what's a good age to date? 00:23:26.87\00:23:28.60 In my opinion, I feel like, it all depends on the person, 00:23:28.64\00:23:32.67 I'm very mature for my age, 00:23:32.71\00:23:35.24 a lot of people wouldn't think I'm only 20 years old, 00:23:35.28\00:23:38.38 they would be like, "I thought you were 25" 00:23:38.41\00:23:41.28 I'm like, "No... I'm only 20 years old" 00:23:41.32\00:23:44.05 and I would say, my maturity came from 00:23:44.09\00:23:46.72 just being around the people that I had... my grandparents, 00:23:46.76\00:23:50.36 my parents, you... for example... 00:23:50.39\00:23:52.59 just seeing other young... 00:23:52.63\00:23:54.20 just seeing other women in my life. 00:23:54.23\00:23:56.16 People mentoring you. 00:23:56.23\00:23:57.57 Yes, people mentoring or pouring into me... 00:23:57.60\00:23:59.70 just seeing how they went about life... 00:23:59.73\00:24:02.00 and I just took that and I ran with it, so... 00:24:02.04\00:24:04.87 Would you date an older man? 00:24:04.91\00:24:06.64 Would I date an older man? 00:24:06.68\00:24:08.34 If I did, it wouldn't be over like three years, 00:24:08.38\00:24:11.51 I wouldn't... the three years would be like my max. 00:24:11.55\00:24:14.65 Okay, see, now, see... 00:24:14.68\00:24:16.02 Uncle Arthur was nine years older than me 00:24:16.05\00:24:18.12 it worked... it worked. 00:24:18.15\00:24:19.65 I'm not saying it couldn't work, I'm not saying... 00:24:19.72\00:24:21.79 I guess... I guess like right now, 00:24:21.82\00:24:25.59 when it comes to age and everything, 00:24:25.63\00:24:28.93 it's all in God's hands... 00:24:28.96\00:24:30.73 I'm not going to go put a time limit 00:24:30.77\00:24:33.37 but me, personally, and I know my dad... 00:24:33.40\00:24:35.97 he's like, "You can't date no one 00:24:36.00\00:24:37.81 past five years or three years" 00:24:37.87\00:24:39.24 so I was like, I have my dad... 00:24:39.27\00:24:40.61 Who's older, your father or your mother? 00:24:40.64\00:24:41.98 My dad is older. 00:24:42.01\00:24:43.35 Than your mother... okay. 00:24:43.38\00:24:44.71 Yes, but only about a couple of months 00:24:44.75\00:24:46.08 because my dad was born 1969, my mom was born 1970... 00:24:46.11\00:24:48.68 so it was not... 00:24:48.72\00:24:50.09 They're going to get you... telling their age 00:24:50.12\00:24:51.49 on national television, oh my goodness, 00:24:51.55\00:24:53.76 so, all right... so... 00:24:53.79\00:24:55.42 it is right to allow the Lord to lead... 00:24:55.46\00:24:58.43 allow the Lord to guide you to that right person 00:24:58.49\00:25:02.60 and where He wants that fit to be... 00:25:02.66\00:25:05.13 Are you strictly interested in marrying an African American? 00:25:05.17\00:25:11.24 I am not... I am not... 00:25:11.27\00:25:14.41 Really... let's talk about that. 00:25:14.44\00:25:16.31 I would... I mean... I would definitely say 00:25:16.34\00:25:19.68 that I don't... you know... 00:25:19.71\00:25:21.05 whatever God has for me and what not... 00:25:21.08\00:25:23.92 so if another ethnicity young man tried talking to me, 00:25:23.95\00:25:29.09 I wouldn't be like, "No... " 00:25:29.12\00:25:30.46 "Because you're not African American... " 00:25:30.49\00:25:31.89 Exactly, even though my grandfather was like, 00:25:31.93\00:25:34.53 "You need to marry within the race" 00:25:34.56\00:25:36.77 and things like that 00:25:36.83\00:25:38.17 I said, "I understand Grandfather 00:25:38.20\00:25:41.00 but if other races come to me, 00:25:41.04\00:25:43.87 if an African American man doesn't come to me, 00:25:43.91\00:25:46.07 and is correct or has some stuff going on... 00:25:46.11\00:25:48.41 but then I have another young man who's interested, 00:25:48.44\00:25:51.41 who is not our color, 00:25:51.45\00:25:52.78 you know, I'm not going to just be like, 00:25:52.81\00:25:54.25 'I'm sorry, I can't date you 00:25:54.28\00:25:55.62 because my grandfather told me to date within our race'" 00:25:55.65\00:25:58.99 as long as you love God... as long as you... 00:25:59.02\00:26:01.89 as long as I can follow you... 00:26:01.92\00:26:03.53 because a man is supposed to lead the household... 00:26:03.56\00:26:05.59 spiritually... in marriage and everything, 00:26:05.63\00:26:07.63 as long as I see that in you, 00:26:07.66\00:26:09.50 as long as you do put God first even before me, 00:26:09.53\00:26:13.13 then, I know that you are a good match to me. 00:26:13.17\00:26:16.27 So, if he's says... 00:26:16.30\00:26:17.71 okay God, brings this wonderful person to you... 00:26:17.77\00:26:19.41 he may not or may be African American... 00:26:19.44\00:26:22.48 may not... and he says, "Well, I live in Turkey" 00:26:22.51\00:26:25.88 you know, your family is here in Michigan 00:26:25.91\00:26:28.48 and you love him, he's of God... 00:26:28.52\00:26:30.65 he's educated... has a good job 00:26:30.69\00:26:32.79 but is in Turkey 00:26:32.85\00:26:34.22 you know, 00:26:34.26\00:26:35.59 that's a long way from mummy and daddy. 00:26:35.62\00:26:39.89 It is a long way from mummy and daddy 00:26:39.93\00:26:41.80 but it's funny that you say that because I told mom and dad, 00:26:41.83\00:26:44.13 I said, "Mom and Dad, what if my husband is in Texas, 00:26:44.17\00:26:46.50 what if my husband is in California, 00:26:46.53\00:26:48.17 or he's somewhere because I love down south, 00:26:48.20\00:26:50.87 if I could do it... I would move down south in a heartbeat, 00:26:50.91\00:26:54.38 I don't like being cold in Michigan... 00:26:54.41\00:26:57.45 it's like snow, it's cold... 00:26:57.48\00:26:59.38 you don't know what it wants to do 00:26:59.41\00:27:01.22 because we get half a day's rain... and that... so... 00:27:01.25\00:27:02.78 if the guy who wants to marry me and he's like, 00:27:02.82\00:27:06.55 "I live in Turkey" and what not... 00:27:06.59\00:27:08.26 I would definitely have to adjust to it... 00:27:08.29\00:27:12.53 and pray about it, 00:27:12.59\00:27:13.93 but if God is saying, 00:27:13.96\00:27:15.30 "This is the man you're supposed to be with" 00:27:15.33\00:27:16.77 then, I'm going to go... Kim: You're going to do it. 00:27:16.80\00:27:19.07 Yeah, I'm going to go... 00:27:19.10\00:27:20.44 it's all about being that support system... 00:27:20.47\00:27:22.14 it's all about being there for him and everything 00:27:22.17\00:27:24.27 and if I... as long as it's going to work for both of us, 00:27:24.31\00:27:27.48 I'm not going to... 00:27:27.51\00:27:28.84 Kim: It will work. Ki'Rah: Exactly. 00:27:28.88\00:27:30.21 In closing, your favorite Scripture. 00:27:30.25\00:27:31.68 Psalm 46 and 5... 00:27:31.71\00:27:34.32 it says, "God is within her, she cannot fail" 00:27:34.35\00:27:37.02 I hold that very dear to my heart 00:27:37.05\00:27:38.82 because God is in everything that I do, 00:27:38.85\00:27:41.29 I don't pray... I mean, I pray every day... 00:27:41.32\00:27:43.79 anything that I do as far as school... 00:27:43.83\00:27:46.23 as far as relationships... as far as ministry, 00:27:46.26\00:27:48.86 I always, "Okay God, give me the okay to do this 00:27:48.90\00:27:52.03 give me the okay to do whatever you want me to do, 00:27:52.10\00:27:54.94 I want to make sure that you are in in my life... 00:27:55.00\00:27:57.67 and that you are Head of my life, 00:27:57.74\00:27:59.54 I don't want to do anything that is not... 00:27:59.57\00:28:01.71 if it does not have you in it" so... 00:28:01.74\00:28:04.41 Well, I just want to thank you for being here, 00:28:04.45\00:28:06.95 you gave us a lot of great information... 00:28:06.98\00:28:08.98 a lot of high energy... all right... 00:28:09.05\00:28:11.09 you just made me tired all right... 00:28:11.15\00:28:13.12 and people say, "Dr. Kim got all this energy" 00:28:13.15\00:28:15.49 but I praise God for your life... 00:28:15.52\00:28:17.29 continue to live to be well. 00:28:17.33\00:28:18.83 I will. 00:28:18.86\00:28:20.30 Positive reflection... 00:28:20.33\00:28:21.66 let it be said in your life that you do have a reflection of God, 00:28:21.70\00:28:26.10 I'm Dr. Kim, continue to live to be well. 00:28:26.13\00:28:29.54 God bless. 00:28:29.57\00:28:31.04