Hi, I'm Dr. Kim and
welcome to: Live to be Well.
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Today we're going to
talk about: Holding On.
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How do you hold on
to God's goodness...
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How do you maintain a
relationship with God...
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and how do you obey God
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being an 18-year-old young woman
all right, but... with old soul.
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I want to welcome
Diamond Kindred to Living Well.
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Thank you for having me.
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Hi Sweetheart, how are you?
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I'm fine, how are you?
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I am good, it is so
nice to have you on.
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I'm honored.
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Oh my goodness, well,
let's talk about Diamond
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I love your name Diamond...
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and you're doing a
new thing with your hair.
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Yes, stepping out the box.
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You're stepping out the box...
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all right, let's talk
about... Diamond, you've been a
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Seventh-day
Adventist all your life.
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Yes.
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You came from a relationship,
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your mother and
father weren't married
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and... but you have a
relationship with your father.
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Yes.
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And, how many siblings?
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I have four siblings...
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wait, I included
myself, I have three siblings.
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And you're the youngest.
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Yes, I'm the baby.
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All right, what has
that been like for you?
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Um, it's good.
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I'm spoiled... so they say...
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I don't think I'm spoiled
but I got the "baby treatment"
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so, that was always nice,
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they always have
to do... around me...
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or have stuff for me
so, that was nice growing up
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I appreciate it.
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So, your father
has other children...
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how many other children?
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Two.
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And are you close to them?
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Yes, I am,
especially my older brother,
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I'm a little bit more
closer to him than my sister.
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All right... all right,
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so, you attended...
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did you attend
Seventh-day Adventist Schools
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growing up?
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Yes, I attended
Orange Year Academy
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for first and second grade
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and then, my mom took me out
and put me in a Charter School.
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In the Charter School.
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Was that... I know
you were still young
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but what was that like, growing
up and being in Public School?
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It was different from
when I was in private school
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because the
classes were way smaller
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and it was more time to
get connected to the teacher
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versus when I went to
Public School and Charter School
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the classes were bigger,
about 30 kids in each classroom
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and it's kind of hectic
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when the teacher doesn't really
pay attention to just you,
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so, it's like, you're
kind of fighting for attention
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and then, you also have to stay
on top of your classes and stuff
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and the work that
you're doing, so...
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for me, it was a challenge
to get to know the teacher
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a little bit but
I was always ahead
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when it came to the schoolwork.
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Right, you were very,
very smart and still you are.
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Church... you
were in the choir...
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Yes.
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"Hands of Praise"
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Pathfinders...
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Pathfinders.
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My mom kept me involved.
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Oh, you were very involved,
going to Camp Meeting...
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Faithfully...
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Faithfully, running around those
Lake Region grounds, all right.
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So, now, being
18... almost 19...
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what challenges
are you facing now?
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Challenge that I face
is, staying connected...
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not so... since with
God but within the church.
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Hmmm...
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It's more so
hard to stay connected
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in my opinion right
now as the younger daughter
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because you're always busy,
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so, sometimes you feel
like you can't always make it
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but I always... always
watch a line even if I don't
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or I pray with my
family all the time, faithfully
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so the challenge in...
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challenge could
be going to church...
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Yeah, physically
being in church...
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not being connected with God...
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my connection with God would
never... ever lose... so...
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Let me ask you a question,
but if you make it to class
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hello, you can make it to
all your different appointments,
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get your hair done,
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why is it a
challenge to make it to church?
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Um, well, for me it's like,
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I guess being so tired sometimes
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yeah, but I feel like
that's still not an excuse
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so, that's something that
I plan on doing better with
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attending church
more often like I used to.
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Now the Bible says,
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"Do not forsake the assembling
of themselves together"
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that's a command...
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Yeah...
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And the Lord wants
us to come together
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so that we can...
in the last days...
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we'll grab those things
to pull on... grow on...
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that's where we learn
our hymns, learn to pray...
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learn to lean on Christ...
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and being in an
environment of fellowship,
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that's how you got to know me.
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You didn't just hit and
miss, "Where's Sister Nolan?"
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You saw Uncle Arthur and I every
week in our rightful place,
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all right,
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you will be over
to the house with us.
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Yes.
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We'd be
fellowshipping at your home.
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So, the
encouragement needs to...
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or the attention needs to be
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"What do I need to do
to pace my time management
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so that I am at church?"
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Do you like attending church?
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Yes, I do... I really
like attending church,
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I feel like, it's
my place to just let go
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and let God come in my life
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and help me during
my weekly struggles
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or things that I feel
like I can do better with
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so, yes, church is like
my woosah with God, so yeah.
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I always get excited
when I look to my left
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and I see you all
sitting over there
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and we're signing to each other
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and I saw you this past Sabbath
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get up... and again
reconnect your life to Christ.
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Yes.
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Why?
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I feel that sometimes I
can feel like I'm falling away
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or I can feel like
I'm pulling away from God,
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not so much He's
pulling away from me
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but I'm pulling away from Him
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so, sometimes I feel like,
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"Yes, I need to
re-dedicate myself to Him,
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I need to give
myself away again,
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because I could be falling off
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so, I know that He's... I
know He's never leaving me
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but sometimes I feel like I
can be pulling away from God
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a little bit... so I always
want to stay connected with Him
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so I always try to push
myself more closer to Him.
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Do you feel a tug-of-war
with Satan trying to pull you
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with social media...
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with all the
different temptations out there?
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Yes, it's a
challenge but I know that
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when he tries to pull me,
I just stay looking at God
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so, with social
media and things like that,
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I try to put more to a
positive state with God
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versus Satan
pulling me towards him
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to make it in a negative aspect
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or trying to turn it
to make it more positive.
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Do you pray, do you study your
Word every day... every day?
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Yes, I pray every single day,
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study my Word... I
try to do every day
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but it can sometimes
be a challenge for me,
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my mindset is so
fast so I try to...
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I'm trying to do
better with that, I am...
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my mom... she is
really on my head with it
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she does it
faithfully every single day...
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her and my grandparents.
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It's a blessing,
that's a blessing.
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I know it's important...
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I study the Sabbath
School lesson in our Quarterly
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and I've learned
so much by taking time
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to just spend with God
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like, quiet time with God...
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now, let's do some
transparency, all right,
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now, you're 18 years of age...
and very attractive young lady.
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Diamond: Thank you.
Kim: You're very welcome...
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have a nice style about you.
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Diamond: Thank you.
Kim: You are very welcome.
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Young men... are
you still a virgin?
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Diamond: Yes. Kim: Really?
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Yes, my mom, she's heavy on it,
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especially with my whole family
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but it's not more
so because of my family
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it's... because
it's in the Bible
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so, I'm very akin to that,
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I feel like in order to
stay connected with God,
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you have to give
yourself to God...
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that means your body as well
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so, I feel like I can't
give my body away to any man
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until he's my husband
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and I don't have a
ring on my finger yet
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so, that means my body is
still mine and God's, so...
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So being connected...
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Yes staying connected with God.
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All right, now you were in
public school in high school.
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Yes.
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And there were a lot of
activities on the Sabbath
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and you were in
the Dance Program.
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Yes.
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Now, how did you get
involved in the Dance...
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because, you know, we as
Seventh-day Adventists...
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we don't
dance... we don't party...
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at least, we're not supposed to,
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now, we know there are those
who are struggling with that.
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Yes.
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So, how did you end in
that... up in that class
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versus music or something else?
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So, in 9th Grade,
we did an Orientation,
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they had different clubs
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where they thought
that we'd be interested in
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and I'm like, "Well,
I always wanted to do
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ballet and stuff
when I was little
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so, let's give it a try,
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so, I signed up for the audition
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but they ended up
putting me in the dance class
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and then, from there on,
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I ended up going
into Dance Workshop
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where we were like the
highest level of the dance
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so we did mostly contemporary
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and then I was in another
smaller group that did Hip Hop
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so, yeah.
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And then these
activities fell during the week
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or were they sometimes on
the Sabbath... Friday evenings?
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Some of them
were during the week
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and sometimes they did
fall during the weekend
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mostly on... our concerts were
mostly like, Saturday evenings
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so...
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Anything during
Sabbath... church hours?
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We would have to go to practice
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like, at 3 o'clockish...
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so that would kind of be
like, right after church...
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and so, they did know that
I was Seventh-day Adventist
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and I would rehearse and
then I would like sit off
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until it was time to perform
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which would be
around, like 7 o'clock, so...
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usually the sun
would be down by then
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except for... closer
to like, the summertime.
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So that you didn't have
it during the summer time
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but closer to the summer.
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Yeah, it was a little later.
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So, how did you
and God work that out?
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I mean, where you
just contributed...
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"I'm a teenager, I'm
going through this thing,
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God have mercy on me"
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but did you feel like God
was saying something to you
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because you knew...
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Yeah, I felt
like... um... it was...
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it was something that I had
to personally talk to God about
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so I did talk to Him
about it and like, for me...
00:09:46.15\00:09:48.88
dance... to me was
like giving a message
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so, I would... God
would move through me
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as I was showing the
message to other people
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because sometimes,
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dance can connect with
people in different ways
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so, I felt like, for me,
my challenge was the time...
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The Sabbath...
00:10:01.40\00:10:02.73
The Sabbath, yeah,
the timing of the Sabbath.
00:10:02.76\00:10:04.10
Because God says... we
keep the 7th day Sabbath.
00:10:04.13\00:10:05.93
Yes, how we keep it holy
00:10:05.97\00:10:07.30
and so, I felt
like that was upon me...
00:10:07.34\00:10:09.70
because I wasn't forced to
00:10:09.74\00:10:11.14
but at the same
time I kind of was
00:10:11.17\00:10:12.71
because it was a grade
requirement that we did it...
00:10:12.74\00:10:15.31
so, it was kind of
like, "What do I do?"
00:10:15.34\00:10:17.55
"Where do I go?"
00:10:17.58\00:10:18.91
But I did pray, every time
00:10:18.95\00:10:20.28
before, during and
after the performances
00:10:20.32\00:10:22.88
I asked Him for forgiveness
for disobeying the Sabbath
00:10:22.92\00:10:25.85
you know, seeing like..
I committed something...
00:10:25.89\00:10:28.19
Excuse me, I didn't
mean to cut you off.
00:10:28.22\00:10:29.56
That's fine.
00:10:29.59\00:10:30.93
But how... even in...
being an adult woman myself...
00:10:30.96\00:10:32.89
you know, mature woman...
00:10:32.93\00:10:34.43
you say, "Okay, I'm
going to commit this act,
00:10:34.46\00:10:37.40
I'm going to ask
for forgiveness...
00:10:37.43\00:10:39.53
but I go back and
commit this act again... "
00:10:39.57\00:10:41.40
and we are all... we have
all fallen short of God's glory,
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we sin... thank God
for His grace and mercy.
00:10:44.57\00:10:46.88
Yes.
00:10:46.91\00:10:48.24
You know, but how do
you think God looks at that
00:10:48.28\00:10:51.05
because we're...
we... we... you know...
00:10:51.11\00:10:52.95
He is infinite... you know,
00:10:52.98\00:10:55.05
and His divine
wisdom but, you know,
00:10:55.08\00:10:57.62
do you ever say, like, you know,
00:10:57.65\00:11:00.09
"God just please
help me to get over this"
00:11:00.16\00:11:02.86
or "through this... "
00:11:02.89\00:11:04.23
Yeah, I did...
and God knows my heart
00:11:04.26\00:11:07.96
and I just... I felt
that it was something
00:11:08.00\00:11:11.73
that I kind of had to do...
00:11:11.77\00:11:13.30
because I'm so passionate about
it and I felt like it helped me
00:11:13.34\00:11:17.77
and God was with
me through all of it
00:11:17.81\00:11:20.31
and He made me a
stronger person today
00:11:20.34\00:11:22.41
because I went through that.
00:11:22.44\00:11:23.78
Okay, I'm going to
go back to something.
00:11:23.81\00:11:25.28
Something that you had to do,
00:11:25.31\00:11:27.48
what about when
it gets to choices
00:11:27.52\00:11:30.25
because you're getting older
00:11:30.29\00:11:31.62
and you say, "I have to
do this, God will understand
00:11:31.65\00:11:34.19
even if it goes
against His Commandments?"
00:11:34.22\00:11:36.16
Hmmm... do you think God
will honor that and think
00:11:36.19\00:11:40.16
"It's okay with
God. " Diamond: No.
00:11:40.20\00:11:42.16
Kim: No... God
does not compromise.
00:11:42.20\00:11:43.90
Yeah.
00:11:43.93\00:11:45.27
And God does not make
any type of concessions,
00:11:45.30\00:11:47.77
His Word is His Word
00:11:47.80\00:11:49.54
as you are maturing and growing
00:11:49.57\00:11:52.07
and you know what I stand
for and I try to be an example
00:11:52.14\00:11:55.34
because I have my Erin
and you are older than Erin...
00:11:55.38\00:11:58.51
you're two years older than Erin
00:11:58.58\00:11:59.91
and my concern has always been
the example you set for Erin
00:11:59.95\00:12:03.55
and the way you carry yourself,
the way you dress, all right.
00:12:03.59\00:12:07.32
Now, recently you did
something, can we go there?
00:12:07.36\00:12:10.59
You can go there.
00:12:10.63\00:12:11.96
Oh yeah, because I
was just in shock...
00:12:11.99\00:12:14.90
I really cried.
00:12:14.93\00:12:16.26
Oh no.
00:12:16.30\00:12:17.63
I did... because I
didn't think you would do that.
00:12:17.67\00:12:19.63
Yes.
00:12:19.67\00:12:21.24
Tell them what you did.
00:12:21.27\00:12:22.60
I pierced my ears.
00:12:22.64\00:12:23.97
You pierced your ears.
00:12:24.01\00:12:25.34
Yes.
00:12:25.37\00:12:26.71
Why would you do that?
00:12:26.74\00:12:28.08
Um, while I was growing
up, everybody would ask,
00:12:28.11\00:12:31.41
"Why your ears not
pierced?" you know,
00:12:31.45\00:12:33.18
because I was in public school
00:12:33.21\00:12:34.55
so they weren't used
to seeing many people
00:12:34.58\00:12:36.08
who didn't have
their ears pierced.
00:12:36.12\00:12:37.45
So, I had to explain to them,
00:12:37.49\00:12:38.82
"I'm Seventh-day Adventist,
I can't pierce my ears,
00:12:38.85\00:12:40.96
it's a part of my religion"
00:12:40.99\00:12:42.39
and as I grew up, I felt like
it was something I wanted...
00:12:42.42\00:12:46.49
well I wished... I
always asked my mom...
00:12:46.56\00:12:48.10
she was like... "No, you're
not getting your ears pierced,
00:12:48.13\00:12:49.46
you let it go...
00:12:49.50\00:12:50.83
you're not getting your
ears pierced, you let it go... "
00:12:50.87\00:12:52.20
and I saw other
people in my family
00:12:52.23\00:12:54.00
started getting their
ears pierced and stuff...
00:12:54.04\00:12:55.37
I'm like, "You know, I
really think I want to do it"
00:12:55.40\00:12:58.04
and at first, I didn't want
to do it... I was against it
00:12:58.07\00:13:00.61
but then I did end up
getting my ears pierced
00:13:00.64\00:13:03.04
and then, like, shortly after...
00:13:03.08\00:13:05.11
I was like, "I should
have never got my ears pierced"
00:13:05.15\00:13:07.02
but it was already
too late, yeah, so...
00:13:07.05\00:13:09.62
So, there were some regrets.
00:13:09.68\00:13:11.02
Yes.
00:13:11.05\00:13:12.39
In hindsight, you know,
00:13:12.42\00:13:13.76
this is why again, God
knows what He's talking about.
00:13:13.79\00:13:16.59
His Word is true
00:13:16.62\00:13:18.76
and I'm not saying,
"Piercing your ears...
00:13:18.79\00:13:20.70
you're going to
miss out on the Kingdom"
00:13:20.73\00:13:22.56
because there's going
to be a lot of folk...
00:13:22.60\00:13:23.93
I have never
had my ears pierced,
00:13:23.97\00:13:26.00
I don't wear
jewelry or anything...
00:13:26.03\00:13:28.00
Elder Nolan and I never
exchanged wedding bands,
00:13:28.04\00:13:31.77
we didn't do that...
00:13:31.81\00:13:33.14
you know, and he would...
00:13:33.17\00:13:34.71
when he first came in
the church he was like,
00:13:34.74\00:13:36.54
"No wedding bands"
00:13:36.61\00:13:37.95
he was happy
because he was like,
00:13:37.98\00:13:39.31
"Oooh, I don't have to
buy you an engagement ring
00:13:39.35\00:13:40.75
or wedding band, all right... "
00:13:40.78\00:13:42.12
and I think he went and bought
golf clubs that time, all right,
00:13:42.15\00:13:44.59
but it's a personal conviction
00:13:44.62\00:13:47.82
because I could lose my
soul because I love shoes,
00:13:47.86\00:13:50.49
everybody knows
that I love shoes
00:13:50.53\00:13:52.23
and... but we are not to worship
or idolize anything but God...
00:13:52.26\00:13:56.80
we are to worship God,
He's the God of Israel.
00:13:56.83\00:13:59.00
So, now you've done that...
00:13:59.03\00:14:01.47
how are you holding on to
the decisions to walk upright
00:14:01.50\00:14:08.08
you know, do you
drink? Diamond: No.
00:14:08.11\00:14:10.55
Kim: Smoke? Diamond: No.
00:14:10.58\00:14:11.91
Kim: All right, any
hard drugs? Diamond: No.
00:14:11.95\00:14:13.58
Now Marijuana is becoming legal.
00:14:13.62\00:14:15.68
Yeah, they're trying
to make it a norm now.
00:14:15.72\00:14:17.35
A norm... yes they are.
00:14:17.39\00:14:18.89
It's... it's... you're
hurting yourself, you know,
00:14:18.95\00:14:21.42
you're killing yourself
trying these new things...
00:14:21.46\00:14:23.69
my mom always says,
"Curiosity kills the cat. "
00:14:23.73\00:14:25.89
I don't want to be the
cat that got killed, so...
00:14:25.93\00:14:27.66
I try to stay away from
temptations and things like that
00:14:27.70\00:14:31.37
I can get happy off life,
00:14:31.40\00:14:33.47
I'm fine the way
I am... with water.
00:14:33.54\00:14:35.34
It was really
interesting this past weekend,
00:14:35.37\00:14:38.27
you spent
Sabbath with Erin and I
00:14:38.31\00:14:40.78
and you're loving and I
was just the old lady...
00:14:40.81\00:14:42.68
I love it... I love
it... Diamond: I love you.
00:14:42.71\00:14:44.55
Kim: And... I'm
not that old but okay
00:14:44.58\00:14:47.62
but you always give a
presence of laughter and joy.
00:14:47.65\00:14:53.89
Diamond: Thank you.
00:14:53.92\00:14:55.39
Kim: You do,
Diamond... and happiness,
00:14:55.42\00:14:57.66
where does that come from?
00:14:57.69\00:14:59.09
I mean, you're just happy.
00:14:59.13\00:15:00.46
My heart... my
heart... Kim: Your heart.
00:15:00.50\00:15:01.83
Diamond: My
family as well. Kim: Yes.
00:15:01.86\00:15:03.20
Diamond: My family is very
goofy so, it's in our genes.
00:15:03.23\00:15:06.10
Kim: You have a
beautiful family.
00:15:06.13\00:15:07.84
Diamond: Thank you... thank you,
00:15:07.87\00:15:09.57
I just feel like life
would be so much easier
00:15:09.60\00:15:12.37
if you just put a smile to it,
00:15:12.41\00:15:13.88
sometimes, yes,
everybody gets ups and downs
00:15:13.94\00:15:17.05
but if you always
look at the positive
00:15:17.08\00:15:19.05
or stay focused
towards God and your goals
00:15:19.08\00:15:20.95
you can't do anything or be
anything but happy so, yeah.
00:15:20.98\00:15:24.82
Kim: Isn't God good?
Diamond: All the time.
00:15:24.85\00:15:27.39
Kim: All the time,
now let's talk about...
00:15:27.42\00:15:29.89
now you are in... you
finished high school...
00:15:29.92\00:15:32.33
Graduated with
honors. Diamond: Yes.
00:15:32.36\00:15:33.90
Now you are in the University,
where are you attending college?
00:15:33.93\00:15:37.67
University of
Michigan, Dearborn.
00:15:37.70\00:15:39.03
And what is your
major? Diamond: Chemistry.
00:15:39.07\00:15:41.44
Kim: Chemistry... my Lord!
blowing up things, all right,
00:15:41.47\00:15:44.71
so, what do you plan to
do, what's your future goal?
00:15:44.74\00:15:47.98
I would like to be a
Pediatric Orthopedic...
00:15:48.01\00:15:49.74
Hmmm...
00:15:49.81\00:15:51.15
And I love bones,
00:15:51.18\00:15:52.55
so, that's why I
want to be an Orthopedic
00:15:52.58\00:15:54.25
because...
00:15:54.28\00:15:55.62
Hmmm... now that's
interesting, you like bones?
00:15:55.65\00:15:56.99
Yes.
00:15:57.02\00:15:58.35
What is it about
bones that fascinates you?
00:15:58.39\00:15:59.72
Well, when I was younger,
I actually broke my Scaphoid.
00:15:59.75\00:16:02.09
Oh, where is the Scaphoid?
00:16:02.12\00:16:03.79
It's right here.
00:16:03.83\00:16:05.16
Really, I remember
that, I remember that...
00:16:05.19\00:16:07.13
And after that,
when I saw my X-rays,
00:16:07.20\00:16:09.33
I'm like, "Wow,
like, how did that happen?
00:16:09.36\00:16:11.93
and how did they
really snap in half?"
00:16:11.97\00:16:14.50
After that... I just knew I
wanted to be a part of bones
00:16:14.54\00:16:17.34
and help people...
make their bones stronger
00:16:17.37\00:16:19.31
and fix bones... repair
bones of younger children
00:16:19.34\00:16:21.68
because our children
are... are our future
00:16:21.71\00:16:23.35
so, if we don't take care
of our kids, what are we doing?
00:16:23.41\00:16:25.51
Right, I broke my
Patella, you know,
00:16:25.55\00:16:28.22
and it broke in four places
00:16:28.25\00:16:30.19
Uncle Arthur told me
to walk back towards him
00:16:30.22\00:16:33.69
I was on Shelly
Bay Beach in Bermuda
00:16:33.72\00:16:36.76
and I said... in
Bermuda... on vacation,
00:16:36.83\00:16:39.79
I said, "I got this. "
00:16:39.86\00:16:41.20
And he said, "Kim,
come back, come back"
00:16:41.23\00:16:43.40
and I was like,
"Please, I know what I'm doing"
00:16:43.43\00:16:46.27
slipped on the algae, I
was in gym shoes... not heels
00:16:46.30\00:16:50.07
and I went down and it
just completely opened,
00:16:50.11\00:16:56.04
broke... four places...
00:16:56.08\00:16:58.41
and they were literally
gathering my knee cap off...
00:16:58.45\00:17:02.08
Diamond: Off the
ground. Kim: Yes...
00:17:02.12\00:17:03.49
and he said, "Will you
listen to me next time?"
00:17:03.52\00:17:06.79
I'm like, "You should
have been more stronger
00:17:06.82\00:17:10.06
and told me,
'Kim don't do that'"
00:17:10.09\00:17:11.89
because I didn't listen.
00:17:11.93\00:17:13.26
So that is always a
reminder, I had three surgeries
00:17:13.29\00:17:17.00
so you took me to
that with bones... and...
00:17:17.03\00:17:19.47
I've got it... and guess what?
00:17:19.50\00:17:21.17
They cut my nerves... and
that's why I can wear heels.
00:17:21.20\00:17:24.31
Oh, see...
00:17:24.34\00:17:25.71
See and they cut the nerves...
00:17:25.74\00:17:27.08
Something good came out of it.
00:17:27.11\00:17:28.44
Something good...
girl... give me some love
00:17:28.48\00:17:29.81
because if I wore flats...
it's just real painful for me,
00:17:29.84\00:17:33.82
I can only be in gym
shoes for a short time
00:17:33.85\00:17:35.98
but heels, I
can stay elevated...
00:17:36.02\00:17:37.45
Yeah, because
your foot's on a...
00:17:37.49\00:17:38.85
That's right...
00:17:38.92\00:17:40.26
and that's why you still see
Aunty Kim in all these heels.
00:17:40.29\00:17:42.46
Looking fabulous every Sabbath.
00:17:42.49\00:17:43.86
I want to thank you,
got to keep it right...
00:17:43.93\00:17:45.59
so, now, you plan to stay
00:17:45.63\00:17:48.43
and go back into
medical school there?
00:17:48.46\00:17:50.90
I do want to go
to either Loma Linda
00:17:50.93\00:17:53.07
or Johns Hopkins
for medical school...
00:17:53.10\00:17:54.90
Well, all right.
00:17:54.94\00:17:56.27
But...
00:17:56.30\00:17:57.64
See, this is Dare to
Dream, dream big, girl.
00:17:57.67\00:17:59.07
So, that's my first plan
but if it's not in God's plan,
00:17:59.11\00:18:04.28
then I will stay in
the University of Michigan
00:18:04.31\00:18:06.11
for medical school as well.
00:18:06.15\00:18:07.65
All right... praise the Lord.
00:18:07.68\00:18:09.15
All right, dating...
00:18:09.18\00:18:10.52
what is a good age for
young people to start dating?
00:18:10.55\00:18:14.16
I say, "35... "
00:18:14.19\00:18:15.72
Oh, 35...
00:18:15.76\00:18:17.09
well, I don't think
it's like a particular age...
00:18:17.13\00:18:22.23
well, of course
not... in the lower teens...
00:18:22.26\00:18:24.83
Like 15... 16, that's too
young. Diamond: Too young.
00:18:24.87\00:18:26.84
Kim: I'm glad you said that.
00:18:26.87\00:18:28.20
Diamond: But I feel like,
it comes when you're ready...
00:18:28.24\00:18:31.14
The Maturity...
00:18:31.17\00:18:32.51
Yeah, when your maturity hits,
00:18:32.54\00:18:33.88
so, it's all about
when you feel like you're
00:18:33.91\00:18:35.84
comfortable
enough to start dating...
00:18:35.88\00:18:37.25
like, right now, I
don't feel comfortable enough
00:18:37.28\00:18:39.78
to start dating... I
think... that's something for
00:18:39.81\00:18:42.92
a few more years... so yeah.
00:18:42.95\00:18:46.62
So, that's 19, 20,
21, 22, 23, 24, 25...
00:18:46.65\00:18:49.02
okay, all right,
few more years...
00:18:49.06\00:18:50.83
I would say 25...
00:18:50.86\00:18:52.26
Because, you know, literally
you have to finish College...
00:18:52.29\00:18:54.20
Yes.
00:18:54.23\00:18:55.56
Medical School...
Diamond: That's another 8 years
00:18:55.60\00:18:56.93
Kim: Residency... if
you do a Fellowship...
00:18:56.97\00:18:58.70
so you've got...
00:18:58.73\00:19:00.07
and some young ladies do
marry and young men marry...
00:19:00.10\00:19:03.07
Medical School...
Dental School, Law School...
00:19:03.10\00:19:05.17
but it's good to have
all that behind you...
00:19:05.24\00:19:07.28
so you can focus
in on your marriage
00:19:07.31\00:19:10.38
and then having children.
00:19:10.41\00:19:11.75
Yes.
00:19:11.78\00:19:13.11
And you don't have to
worry about all that...
00:19:13.15\00:19:14.48
it's difficult to go to
school and married and all that
00:19:14.52\00:19:18.12
that's a lot of responsibility.
00:19:18.15\00:19:19.49
It's a lot of... and work.
00:19:19.52\00:19:20.86
And work... I
have a lot of friends
00:19:20.89\00:19:23.76
who have not
completed and we call it: ABD...
00:19:23.83\00:19:27.23
you know what
ABD is? Diamond: No.
00:19:27.26\00:19:28.83
Kim: All but dissertation...
00:19:28.86\00:19:30.20
Oh, okay...
00:19:30.23\00:19:31.57
And things have come
whether it's finances,
00:19:31.60\00:19:34.87
couldn't complete the program,
00:19:34.90\00:19:37.64
children, parents, lot
of reasons, all right...
00:19:37.67\00:19:41.28
and I was thankful
00:19:41.31\00:19:43.45
that I was able to
complete them and move forward.
00:19:43.48\00:19:47.35
Let's talk about
what type of young man
00:19:47.38\00:19:50.22
you think you
would be interested in.
00:19:50.29\00:19:52.95
Okay, he has to
be a God-fearing man,
00:19:52.99\00:19:55.59
he has to have God
at the top of his list.
00:19:55.62\00:19:57.36
Now, does he have to
be Seventh-day Adventist?
00:19:57.39\00:19:59.06
I prefer if he is
Seventh-day Adventist.
00:19:59.09\00:20:02.03
Amen... "Be thou
not unequally yoked. "
00:20:02.06\00:20:04.73
And I want to
have an equal yoke.
00:20:04.77\00:20:06.43
You want to have an
equal yoke, that's nice.
00:20:06.47\00:20:08.34
Yes, you have to have education.
00:20:08.37\00:20:09.70
Kim:
Education... Diamond: Family.
00:20:09.74\00:20:11.07
Does he have to be a doctor,
or lawyer... or dentist...
00:20:11.11\00:20:13.58
or just have education...
under-grad degree... or...
00:20:13.61\00:20:16.24
Yes, a degree... a degree,
00:20:16.28\00:20:18.18
working towards something,
00:20:18.21\00:20:20.02
you can't just be
comfortable in life,
00:20:20.05\00:20:21.98
you have to always be pushing
to do better with yourself...
00:20:22.02\00:20:24.75
Okay, I'm sorry,
pushing towards...
00:20:24.79\00:20:27.02
but what if he has
his own business...
00:20:27.06\00:20:29.26
film production... or
he has a lumber business
00:20:29.29\00:20:32.69
or paper
business... that's big money.
00:20:32.73\00:20:34.96
Yeah, if that's
what he loves to do,
00:20:35.00\00:20:37.20
then who am I to interfere
00:20:37.23\00:20:39.47
with what he loves
to do with his career?
00:20:39.53\00:20:40.87
Kim: Okay. Diamond: So... yeah.
00:20:40.90\00:20:42.24
Kim: If he makes furniture...
00:20:42.27\00:20:43.61
somebody has to
make these chairs.
00:20:43.64\00:20:44.97
Obviously, somebody
has to do the job...
00:20:45.01\00:20:47.04
so, if that's what
he loves to do, then yes
00:20:47.08\00:20:49.04
but if he has education...
he has to be family oriented...
00:20:49.08\00:20:51.48
because I love my family,
00:20:51.51\00:20:53.52
family is second on my
list because God is always first
00:20:53.58\00:20:56.32
but they have to... they
have to just be connected,
00:20:56.35\00:20:59.05
they have to always be
working harder... so...
00:20:59.09\00:21:01.36
So, you have a nice little crew
00:21:01.39\00:21:03.46
with your girls at church
and Erin... and the girls...
00:21:03.49\00:21:06.93
they come over to the
house... Diamond: Yes.
00:21:06.96\00:21:08.30
How important is
your Christian...
00:21:08.33\00:21:10.10
Seventh-day
Adventist support your girls...
00:21:10.13\00:21:13.50
It is very important to me
00:21:13.54\00:21:15.57
because they've been with
me through my lowest times,
00:21:15.60\00:21:17.94
they literally have
been with me all of my life
00:21:17.97\00:21:20.18
so my connection with
them is very important to me...
00:21:20.21\00:21:23.18
to stay connected
with my friends from church
00:21:23.24\00:21:25.41
because they are the
ones who I can relate with
00:21:25.45\00:21:27.35
in certain situations
00:21:27.38\00:21:28.72
that people from
outside world cannot
00:21:28.75\00:21:30.52
and they also help me
to witness to other people
00:21:30.55\00:21:32.65
like we're... we are
each other's backbones...
00:21:32.69\00:21:34.72
we pick each other up
where the other one falls so...
00:21:34.76\00:21:36.32
And you do... I've seen that.
00:21:36.36\00:21:38.03
Now, you're so
cute when you said,
00:21:38.06\00:21:39.93
"all my life... "
like you're 85 years old...
00:21:39.96\00:21:42.83
all right... 18
years old, all right.
00:21:42.86\00:21:45.43
Let's talk about the importance
of the standards of the church.
00:21:45.47\00:21:51.01
Okay.
00:21:51.04\00:21:52.37
I know we practice
not wearing jewelry
00:21:52.41\00:21:55.58
or abstaining from
alcohol and nicotine
00:21:55.61\00:21:58.65
and we... um...
00:21:58.68\00:22:00.68
going to places
that are not conducive
00:22:00.72\00:22:03.95
to the teachings
of the Word of God...
00:22:03.99\00:22:06.82
Yes.
00:22:06.86\00:22:08.19
Entertainment... in these times
what do you do for entertainment
00:22:08.22\00:22:12.66
because... now
we're not supposed...
00:22:12.69\00:22:14.83
I don't go to the movies...
00:22:14.86\00:22:16.20
I do not go to
the movies, I don't...
00:22:16.23\00:22:19.53
because of things
00:22:19.57\00:22:21.00
and I can't sit that
long, to tell you the truth.
00:22:21.04\00:22:23.61
Yeah, I haven't been to
the movies in a while either.
00:22:23.64\00:22:25.84
So, you have gone to the movies.
00:22:25.87\00:22:27.71
I have... yes, but recently
00:22:27.74\00:22:29.88
I haven't been going to
the movies... they cost a lot.
00:22:29.91\00:22:32.48
I know and you are on a budget.
00:22:32.51\00:22:33.95
You know, college student.
00:22:33.98\00:22:35.35
I paid for your lunch, didn't I?
00:22:35.38\00:22:37.32
I'm thankful for
it, it was great,
00:22:37.35\00:22:39.19
but lots of my
friends... the same way,
00:22:39.25\00:22:41.52
mostly I hang out with my
friends when I have free time
00:22:41.59\00:22:43.93
because... two
jobs... I work hard...
00:22:43.96\00:22:46.73
Yes, you're working now.
00:22:46.76\00:22:48.10
Pay all my friends...
shopping... I like to shop, yes
00:22:48.13\00:22:51.27
sometimes I do watch
television, sometimes...
00:22:51.30\00:22:55.27
Do you like to travel
00:22:55.30\00:22:56.64
or you think you would
like to travel in the future?
00:22:56.67\00:22:58.41
I would like to
travel, I don't travel as much
00:22:58.44\00:22:59.77
as I probably used to, but...
00:22:59.81\00:23:01.34
Do you have a passport?
00:23:01.38\00:23:02.71
No, not yet, but
we're going to get one.
00:23:02.74\00:23:04.08
We have to get one because
Aunt Kim's got some plans, yes.
00:23:04.11\00:23:06.68
And I want to be a
part of those plans...
00:23:06.72\00:23:08.25
I'll definitely get one.
00:23:08.28\00:23:10.09
Okay...
00:23:10.12\00:23:11.45
But yeah, traveling would
be coming in the near future.
00:23:11.49\00:23:13.56
Okay, so this person
that you would like to date
00:23:13.59\00:23:17.36
and marry in the future
has to have some good qualities
00:23:17.39\00:23:22.23
be able to...
you're very articulate...
00:23:22.26\00:23:24.53
to be 18...
00:23:24.57\00:23:25.97
why is that so important
because I don't hear you saying,
00:23:26.00\00:23:28.94
"Yay" and all...
you say, "Thank you"
00:23:28.97\00:23:30.94
like you're
southern grown, "Thank you"
00:23:30.97\00:23:32.87
and such manners...
00:23:32.94\00:23:34.94
I know your family... your
grandparents, your aunts...
00:23:35.01\00:23:38.68
I know how important that is.
00:23:38.71\00:23:40.05
That's where I got it from.
00:23:40.08\00:23:41.42
And that's
where you got it from.
00:23:41.45\00:23:42.78
They never
allowed me to say, "Yay. "
00:23:42.82\00:23:45.05
Yay and naw... what
is... how was that...
00:23:45.09\00:23:46.96
They don't like
slang, I don't either.
00:23:46.99\00:23:48.82
So, "Yay" "Naw" "Uh huh. "
00:23:48.86\00:23:51.43
They're very, very
stern on how you speak
00:23:51.46\00:23:55.66
because you're going
to need it in the long run
00:23:55.70\00:23:57.77
with your careers...
00:23:57.80\00:23:59.13
how you speak to
people is how they take...
00:23:59.17\00:24:01.04
how you are as a person, so,
00:24:01.07\00:24:02.40
speaking is a key
factor in my family.
00:24:02.44\00:24:05.17
I was going to
hire this young person
00:24:05.21\00:24:07.41
and they were
going to be on the phone
00:24:07.44\00:24:09.58
because I needed to
hire two... three new people
00:24:09.61\00:24:11.41
and well dressed...
resume looked good...
00:24:11.45\00:24:15.52
and I put them on the phone,
put this person on the phone,
00:24:15.55\00:24:19.22
and I stood back
just listening...
00:24:19.25\00:24:22.56
and, "Kim Logan on vacation...
00:24:22.62\00:24:25.86
she not ready right now...
00:24:25.89\00:24:28.86
can I help you?"
00:24:28.90\00:24:31.53
Pause...
00:24:31.57\00:24:32.90
And I was like... and
I walked in... I said,
00:24:32.93\00:24:34.34
"Can I have the
phone for a second please?"
00:24:34.40\00:24:35.97
Because my Receptionist is
the first person they meet...
00:24:36.00\00:24:39.14
Who represents you, yeah.
00:24:39.17\00:24:40.74
That's right, and they may say,
00:24:40.78\00:24:42.14
"Well, she hired that person"
00:24:42.18\00:24:43.51
and I spoke to the
person and let them know
00:24:43.55\00:24:46.01
that you need to take
some classes in communication,
00:24:46.05\00:24:50.15
it is very important,
00:24:50.19\00:24:51.82
I could not do this
program on Dare to Dream
00:24:51.85\00:24:54.46
you know, "How
you doing... Diam... "
00:24:54.52\00:24:56.59
"You know... lowing lo ah... "
00:24:56.62\00:24:58.19
"Well, let it be... where?"
00:24:58.23\00:24:59.69
I probably couldn't
even take that serious.
00:24:59.73\00:25:01.16
I know... it's like really?
00:25:01.23\00:25:03.26
But we see it in our athletes,
00:25:03.33\00:25:05.30
we see it in our communities,
00:25:05.33\00:25:07.24
we see it on television.
00:25:07.27\00:25:10.31
Yes, and some people see it
in their households as well.
00:25:10.34\00:25:12.47
Right.
00:25:12.51\00:25:13.84
And I feel like
communication starts at home.
00:25:13.88\00:25:15.68
Yes, it does.
00:25:15.71\00:25:17.05
So, before you can
even step out the door,
00:25:17.08\00:25:18.58
you should always get your
communication from your family,
00:25:18.61\00:25:21.92
like, my mom...
she always taught me,
00:25:21.95\00:25:23.28
"Don't use slang because it
will hurt you in the long run
00:25:23.32\00:25:26.02
when you have a career. "
00:25:26.05\00:25:27.39
I can't talk to
patients... Kim: "Wassup. "
00:25:27.42\00:25:28.82
Diamond: Yeah, I can't
say that to my patients.
00:25:28.89\00:25:30.29
Kim: Walk into
the room... "ahhh... "
00:25:30.33\00:25:31.66
Diamond: They'll be
like, "Is this my doctor?"
00:25:31.69\00:25:33.03
Kim: Right... right.
00:25:33.06\00:25:34.40
Diamond: So, communication
is the key of life,
00:25:34.43\00:25:36.30
you have to communicate,
00:25:36.33\00:25:37.67
you have to be able to
communicate with the people so.
00:25:37.70\00:25:39.13
Kim: And it's
important. Diamond: Yeah.
00:25:39.20\00:25:41.60
Kim: I remember
I had a gentleman,
00:25:41.64\00:25:44.04
he was European American...
00:25:44.07\00:25:46.14
Caucasian... and
he came to my office
00:25:46.17\00:25:49.71
now, back then it
wasn't anything on internet,
00:25:49.74\00:25:53.45
there was no pictures...
so he went by the name: Logan
00:25:53.48\00:25:56.18
and that's Irish...
00:25:56.22\00:25:57.82
and so, he came in...
he looked at me... he said,
00:25:57.85\00:26:01.79
"Wow! you're African American. "
00:26:01.82\00:26:04.63
And I said, "Well,
the last time I checked"
00:26:04.69\00:26:06.63
and he said, "But I was
looking for a white therapist"
00:26:06.66\00:26:11.63
and I said,
"Well, I'll tell you what
00:26:11.67\00:26:14.34
why don't you sit
down, talk with me
00:26:14.37\00:26:16.97
and in an hour... if
you're not satisfied,
00:26:17.01\00:26:20.04
you don't have to
pay me anything. "
00:26:20.08\00:26:21.44
And he was like,
00:26:21.51\00:26:23.95
"You speak well, I
understand what you're saying
00:26:23.98\00:26:28.22
you gave me tools today,
00:26:28.25\00:26:30.29
you diagnosed me today... "
00:26:30.32\00:26:32.29
I was able to let him
know what type of stresses
00:26:32.32\00:26:34.52
he was dealing with.
00:26:34.56\00:26:35.89
Do you know, he
invited me to do the training
00:26:35.92\00:26:38.86
for the
Lutheran School System...
00:26:38.89\00:26:40.80
he invited me to come
and do conflict resolution
00:26:40.83\00:26:44.20
at his school...
he was a Principal...
00:26:44.27\00:26:45.73
He was at my wedding...
I was at his wedding...
00:26:45.77\00:26:48.84
and we became
the best of friends.
00:26:48.87\00:26:50.81
Diamond: That's a blessing.
00:26:50.84\00:26:52.17
Kim: Isn't that a blessing?
Diamond: That's a blessing.
00:26:52.21\00:26:53.54
Kim: You can't
judge a book by its cover.
00:26:53.58\00:26:54.91
Don't lump us all together,
00:26:54.94\00:26:56.88
no matter what our
culture or background...
00:26:56.91\00:26:58.55
because we can
speak, we can communicate.
00:26:58.58\00:27:00.72
Yes.
00:27:00.75\00:27:02.08
And young people like
yourself are being raised
00:27:02.12\00:27:04.52
to be able to represent our
communities... our people...
00:27:04.55\00:27:07.99
as a culture.
00:27:08.02\00:27:09.36
Yes.
00:27:09.39\00:27:10.73
All right...
let me ask you this.
00:27:10.76\00:27:12.09
Okay.
00:27:12.13\00:27:13.46
What's your role in the church?
00:27:13.50\00:27:14.83
My role in the church right now
00:27:14.86\00:27:16.83
is a person who
represents the youth
00:27:16.87\00:27:19.80
because the Pastor
knows me very well,
00:27:19.83\00:27:21.60
so, he asks... sometimes,
like, "What do the youth like?"
00:27:21.64\00:27:26.27
Or, "What can I do better?"
00:27:26.31\00:27:27.64
So, as being a
voice of the youth,
00:27:27.68\00:27:30.25
I feel like that's an important
role in the church as it is
00:27:30.28\00:27:33.42
because a lot of youth do
not come to church anymore
00:27:33.45\00:27:36.32
and it's a struggle
to get people in church
00:27:36.35\00:27:38.25
so, when he sees us... a
group of friends together,
00:27:38.29\00:27:42.09
he's just
like... he's happy and...
00:27:42.12\00:27:43.96
so, I feel like my role
is a person of the youth,
00:27:43.99\00:27:47.50
a person that's
living in today's time
00:27:47.53\00:27:48.93
at such a young age is difficult
00:27:48.96\00:27:51.20
so, I think that's probably it.
00:27:51.23\00:27:53.00
And to encourage
others to come inside.
00:27:53.03\00:27:54.37
Definitely, yes.
00:27:54.40\00:27:55.90
Well, listen,
Diamond, thank you,
00:27:55.97\00:27:57.51
you were
amazing... Diamond: Thank you.
00:27:57.57\00:27:59.11
Kim: I want you to know
it's important to hold on...
00:27:59.14\00:28:01.74
keep holding
on... would you do that?
00:28:01.78\00:28:03.51
Yes, hold on.
00:28:03.55\00:28:04.88
Hold on... hold on
in sign language, yes
00:28:04.91\00:28:07.02
and let's see Jesus
together. Diamond: Yes.
00:28:07.05\00:28:09.18
Kim: I want to
thank you once again
00:28:09.22\00:28:10.89
for being on Live to be Well.
00:28:10.92\00:28:12.59
I want to say to all of you,
00:28:12.62\00:28:14.26
"Hold on and
continue to live to be well,
00:28:14.32\00:28:17.29
you can make it,
don't ever give up. "
00:28:17.33\00:28:20.30
God bless.
00:28:20.33\00:28:21.66