Participants: Jeff Reich
Series Code: LM
Program Code: LM000065
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00:01 I remember the first time I visited
00:02 a Seventh-day Adventist Church. 00:04 I didn't come to listen to the preacher 00:05 or listen to an evangelist. 00:07 To tell you the truth, I came to create such a ruckus 00:10 that the police would have to come 00:11 and remove my girlfriend and a friend of mine 00:13 and I figured that way they would never ask me 00:15 to come to that church again. 00:16 Stay tuned in, I'll tell you a little more about it. 00:42 My parents who had been church-hopping a little bit 00:45 but they weren't overly religious at that time 00:48 went to a Seventh-day Adventist Church 00:51 and they went through a whole set of 00:52 what was called evangelistic meetings 00:54 at this church and they were baptized 00:56 into a Seventh-day Adventist Church. 00:57 Well, my brother and my sister and I all thought my parents 01:00 are just kind of really gone crazy 01:02 in order to join this church 01:03 because we heard that they went to church 01:05 on the wrong day of the week and they just seemed 01:08 like, I never heard of Seventh-day Adventist before. 01:11 And it was probably about three or four months later 01:16 another evangelist came to town 01:17 and I remember I was playing music with my friends 01:20 we were jamming and smoking marijuana 01:21 and drinking beer 01:23 and we just got then playing a set of music 01:24 and we were just taking a little break 01:26 and a telephone rang and I-- 01:29 one of my friends picked up the phone and he said, 01:31 hey, Jeff, it's your mom, she wants to talk to you. 01:33 And so I went over and said, hi. 01:34 And she said, hey, how would like to hear and evangelist? 01:37 I said, what? 01:38 How would you like to come and hear an evangelistic series? 01:39 I said, what's that? 01:41 And she said, well, it's a guy 01:42 who is preaching from the Bible you know, 01:43 sharing different things. 01:44 And I said, just a second, 01:45 and I put my hand over the phone 01:47 and I looked at the keyboard player 01:48 and I said, how would you like to go 01:49 to an evangelistic meeting? 01:50 How would you like to go listen to someone 01:52 preaching the Word of God? 01:53 And he said, yeah, sure that sounds good. 01:55 And I said, yeah, what time is it? 01:57 And she said, 7 o' clock. 01:58 And so I went and got my girlfriend, 02:00 got a six pack of beer 02:02 we smoked a couple of marijuana and cigarettes, 02:03 the keyboard player and I squirmed over 02:05 to the Seventh-day Adventist Church 02:06 with my girl in a 1939 Chevy with a Corvette engine, 02:10 big wide tires, black leather coat, 02:11 long blonde hair down my shoulders 02:13 and we came into this church. 02:15 And like I said at the beginning of this presentation 02:17 we didn't come to listen to the evangelist. 02:22 In fact, what we did as we came to this church 02:24 to sit up in the balcony to create such a ruckus 02:27 that we knew that they would have to call the police 02:30 and physically remove us from the church 02:32 and you see that way I thought my parents 02:33 would never ever invite me to come to this church again. 02:37 And I thought well, that would take care of this you know, 02:38 and that will settle everything. 02:41 And an interesting thing happened 02:43 because special music started. 02:45 They dimmed the lights in the church 02:46 and this lady came out to start to sing 02:48 and I wasn't into that kind of music you know, 02:50 but I was a musician and I was listening 02:52 and it sounded pretty good, you know and we were listening 02:55 and by the way when we first got to the church 02:56 we were making a lot of noise and up in the balcony 03:00 and some of the old folks were looking up there 03:01 like who are those kids up there anyhow making all that noise. 03:04 And just never ever forget that 03:06 if this happens in your church 03:08 you never know who those people 03:10 really might end up being someday. 03:12 We listened and you know what happened that night? 03:15 The opening night subject was on spiritualism. 03:19 My mouth dropped open because of all the things 03:21 that happened in my younger years 03:22 of my life previous to that point of coming to the church. 03:26 And so I sit there and I listened 03:27 how this evangelist had been raised in a spiritualist home 03:30 and all the things that happened and I couldn't believe it. 03:33 And so we went back there second night, 03:35 and you know what he was talking on? 03:36 He was talking on rock music and hypnosis. 03:40 And I turned to the keyboard player 03:41 and I said, hey, this guy knows more about music than we do 03:43 because we knew what he was saying was true. 03:46 So, night after night 03:47 we went listening to this evangelist 03:49 and the Bible started coming alive. 03:51 All these things that were inconsistent to me in the path 03:54 that I couldn't put together the bits and pieces 03:57 started fitting together. 03:58 And after the evangelistic series was done 04:00 my parents introduced me to an elderly gentlemen, 04:03 in fact, he introduced to group of young people 04:04 to an elderly gentlemen, who was a retired Bible worker. 04:08 And the interesting thing was about this Bible workers 04:10 was every single time I'd ask him a question 04:13 from the Bible he'd never give me his opinion. 04:15 He'd never say, well, I think. 04:17 He said, Jeff, I want to show you 04:19 what the Bible says, 04:20 and systematically verse by verse 04:22 he would show what the Bible says 04:24 and he would allow me to come to my own conclusion 04:27 of what God's word said. 04:28 And you know that's what I'd been looking for all along. 04:30 I'd sit in pastor studies for different denominations 04:34 and I'd ask different questions 04:36 and lot of times the pastors would close their Bibles 04:38 and they would say something like, 04:40 well, Jeff, let me tell you something. 04:41 As soon as they said that I'm turned them out 04:43 because I didn't care what a pastor thought. 04:45 I wanted to know what the Word of God thought. 04:48 And I'll be honest with you, 04:50 through the evangelistic series 04:52 through studying with the Bible worker 04:54 I learned a lot of doctrines. 04:55 But there is one thing that I failed to learn 04:59 and that was how to have a personal relationship 05:02 with Jesus Christ. 05:04 So like many numbers through evangelism 05:08 I was one of those people that quit coming to church 05:10 but my girlfriend, she kind of caught the message 05:14 and together with my brother and my sister 05:16 they started having Friday night sundown worships. 05:19 We were both baptized in church by the way at the second series 05:22 that we went to and my girlfriend decided 05:24 that she really wanted to stick with that. 05:27 By the way that girlfriend is still my wife today 05:30 amazingly enough after all these years. 05:32 But I'll tell you what happen 05:33 was my conscious was awakened 05:36 but, at the same time I started running from God. 05:38 It's a terrible thing to have learned all these bible truths, 05:41 all the dos and don'ts of Christianity 05:43 but yet not know how to tap 05:45 into the power to do all those dos and don'ts. 05:48 And my girlfriend, she moved to Alaska 05:50 and I followed her to Alaska. 05:52 And up in Alaska we were smoking marijuana 05:55 and we were running from God 05:56 and dealing with some personal issues up there 05:59 and feeling really guilty because we knew what was right 06:02 and she was trying to do what was right 06:04 and I was kind of pulling her the wrong direction 06:05 because I wasn't making any commitment to God 06:07 and I met this guy that was a guitar player 06:09 and one Saturday afternoon, Sabbath afternoon 06:12 we went out to this park 06:14 and this just shows you how God sometimes work, 06:17 He works in just amazing ways. 06:18 But we went to this park 06:20 and there was this kind of like geodesic dome 06:22 where you could sit and play your guitars 06:23 and it had a really nice acoustics to it. 06:25 And we were jamming away on our acoustic guitars, 06:28 playing a bunch of rock music and folk music 06:31 and this guy walked up with a guitar case 06:33 and he had Jesus Saves stickers 06:35 all over the outside of his guitar case 06:36 and I was looking at my friend 06:38 and I like, oh, no, who's this guy? 06:39 And he said, hey, man, can I jam with you guys? 06:41 And we said, sure. 06:42 And he said, do you know any Christian songs? 06:43 I said, no, we're not playing Christian songs here. 06:46 And he said, hey, have you two been saved? 06:48 And I said to him, yeah, I've been saved once 06:51 but I am not practicing right now. 06:52 He said, you've been saved, 06:53 you are not practicing right now? 06:54 And he got this close to my face 06:56 and he said, repent brother, you need to repent. 06:59 I said, who are you to tell me to repent? 07:00 He said, the Word of God tells me to tell you to repent, 07:03 you've back slipped, you need to repent. 07:05 And I started shaking and I thought, 07:07 you know, 'cause I knew down inside 07:08 this gentleman was telling me what was right. 07:11 And so we left Alaska, we went back to other town, 07:14 we lived in at that time 07:17 and we decided to move 07:18 to another little town out in the country 07:20 to try to get away from our friends 07:21 and our influences. 07:23 My wife and I, my girlfriend and I got married 07:25 and I was working at a job there 07:29 and every Wednesday night 07:31 Christy, my wife would go to the local Adventist church 07:34 and she would pray 07:35 with an elderly little group of women 07:37 there at prayer meeting on Wednesday night, 07:40 oh, please convert Christy's husband, 07:44 help Jeff to come to the truth 07:45 and help him to come back to the church. 07:47 And we never know the power of prayer, 07:50 how that really can affect a person 07:51 and how that really end up being an instrument 07:54 in leading a person back to God 07:56 because at that time I was really starting 07:59 to become more and more convicted. 08:01 And as I share this with you, 08:03 it's a little bit sensitive because it's a-- 08:07 its one thing to go to church 08:10 it's another thing to be a Christian. 08:11 It's one thing to be involved in churchianity, 08:13 it's another thing to become a Christian. 08:15 People ask me, well, how long have you been an Adventist? 08:17 I say, well, I was an Adventist, baptized Adventist in 1976, 08:21 and then I hesitate and I say, 08:22 but I become a Christian in 1981. 08:25 And they look at me and a little bit startled 08:27 by that but a lot of people 08:28 professed to belong to some church 08:30 but they really haven't experienced 08:31 the conversion experience in Christ. 08:34 And that's exactly what happened to me, 08:35 I didn't have an experience, 08:37 a Christian experience with Christ 08:39 but I knew all these different doctrines, 08:40 I knew all these different things 08:42 but at the same time I started going to church. 08:45 You know, I guess you can say, 08:47 praise God, started going to church, 08:49 started advancing in truth, 08:50 started reading a lot of the books, 08:52 started studying my Bible and trying to do 08:54 all the different things you should do as a Christian. 08:57 You see, I had entered into a phase 08:59 and maybe you can relate to this and maybe you can't, 09:01 becoming a schizophrenic Seventh-day Adventist. 09:04 Maybe you've never heard 09:05 of a schizophrenic Seventh-day Adventist 09:07 or a schizophrenic Christian. 09:09 That's a person who basically 09:11 has like a split religious personality. 09:14 You know you have a double standard 09:15 when you are with one group of people, 09:16 you do one thing, 09:18 with your different group of people 09:19 you do different thing. 09:20 When I got with my old friends I would do what they were doing 09:22 and then when I got with the church people 09:24 I looked really good and I had my tie on 09:26 and had my haircut short now and was attending church. 09:29 In fact, you know what, 09:31 I started even reading out in Sabbath school class 09:34 and I started holding different positions in the church. 09:36 It's just the young person, 09:37 I was involved with the youth group 09:39 in our local church 09:40 and the same time I was still smoking marijuana, 09:44 still drinking from time to time and doing these things 09:46 but I kept those things quiet and secret 09:49 and I never let the church people know 09:50 or the pastor know that I was doing all those things 09:51 because that's taboo, you are not suppose to do that. 09:54 And so I was like this schizophrenic person, 09:56 at one hand you know, 09:58 I am going to church and looking good 09:59 and everybody thought, oh, isn't it wonderful, 10:00 Jeff is coming to church and on the other hand 10:02 when I got with my other friend 10:04 I was doing the things that they were doing. 10:06 And of course then I had to start really being careful 10:08 about the bad things that I was doing. 10:10 In fact, I got to a point 10:11 where I was so good at doing those bad things 10:13 that I put toothpaste in my mouth, 10:14 my wife never even knew 10:15 that I was still smoking marijuana 10:17 and doing some of these other things 10:19 that I shouldn't be doing. 10:20 And during this whole period of time 10:23 I was dealing with a lot of guilt. 10:25 You see its one thing to know what is right 10:28 but still end up doing the wrong thing. 10:31 And I continued reading my Bible 10:32 and the more I read my Bible the more I read other books 10:35 that are published by the church, 10:36 I started feeling more and more guilty 10:37 and more and more condemned 10:39 but the same time I had head knowledge, 10:40 I could give you all the different 10:42 27 fundamental believes, 10:43 I could take you through a Bible study, 10:45 I can tell you about the 12 seals 10:48 in the Book of Revelation 10:50 or the seven seals in the Book of Revelation 10:52 or state of the dead or any of the other Bible doctrines. 10:56 And I remember reading one time in the Book of Romans. 11:00 In fact, I'd like to just share that with you. 11:02 In the Book of Romans in Chapter 7, 11:04 I read a statement that just really hit me 11:07 and actually this is the statement 11:09 that I started to read 11:10 at the very beginning of this introduction, 11:12 it says, "For that which I do I allow not, 11:17 for what I would, that do I not but what I hate, that do I." 11:23 And I thought to myself, 11:24 you know, when I read this during this time in my life, 11:26 it's exactly me. 11:27 You know, here I am, 11:28 that which I know I shouldn't be doing 11:29 I'm doing and the things that I know I should be doing 11:32 I'm not doing 11:33 and I found myself in this dilemma 11:36 doing the very things that I hate. 11:37 And Paul goes on and says, 11:39 "If then I do that which I would not, 11:42 I consent to the law that it is good." 11:43 In other words, the law condemns us 11:45 when we do things that are wrong, 11:47 I consent to the law that those things 11:49 that I'm doing are not good. 11:51 And Paul goes on in verse 17 and say, 11:53 "Now then it is no more I that do it, 11:55 but sin that dwelleth in me." 11:56 And I thought to myself, yep, that's true. 11:58 "For I know that in me, that is, in my flesh, 12:00 dwelleth no good thing, for to will is present with me 12:05 but how to perform that which is good I find not." 12:08 You know, so many Christians are struggling 12:10 with this very point in their life, 12:12 they know what they should be doing 12:14 but they don't have the power to be able to really do things 12:16 that they know they should be doing 12:18 and so they pretend to be Christians, 12:20 they are involved in churchianity, 12:21 they go to church week after week 12:23 and they pretend to be Christians. 12:25 And inside they want to have power to be overcome-- 12:27 to be able to overcome in their life 12:28 but they don't know how to overcome it. 12:31 They know all these different dos and don'ts, 12:32 they know different doctrinal subjects 12:35 but yet they don't know 12:36 how to have an experience with Christ 12:38 to overcome the sinful nature of that they have. 12:42 And Paul goes on to say, "Now if I do that I would not, 12:46 it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 12:50 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, 12:53 evil is present with me. 12:55 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man." 12:57 And I could say even that. 12:58 I wanted to be a Christian, 13:00 I delighted in the law, I thought it was right, 13:01 it was holy, just and great thus I should be doing God's law. 13:04 "But I see another law in my members, 13:06 warring against the law of my mind, 13:09 bringing me into captivity to the law of sin 13:11 which is in my members." 13:13 Brother and sisters, this is the battle of the mind 13:15 and this where a lot of us are, we're struggling, 13:17 we're trying to overcome our fleshly tendencies. 13:19 We're struggling with different things in our lives 13:21 so we don't know how to overcome 13:23 and we have this battle going on between the flesh and the spirit 13:26 and trying to live up to the light 13:28 that God has given us. 13:30 And then finally Paul cries out, "O wretched man that I am! 13:33 Who shall deliver me from this body of death?" 13:36 I was fighting, you know, this fight, 13:38 I was mentally trying to justify sin to deal with guilt 13:42 and at the same time I wasn't dealing 13:43 with the root of the problem and dealing with the sin itself 13:46 and it became a vicious circle. 13:49 A circumstance happened in my home one day 13:53 and during this time my wife had just came into the house 13:59 and I do these different crazy things, 14:03 you know, I would go down to my shop, 14:06 I was running a repair shop at that time 14:08 where I was restoring antique and classic cars 14:10 and I would smoke some marijuana 14:13 I go up to the house and see my wife 14:14 and I try to hide it and not let her know 14:16 that I'd been doing that. 14:18 And I would-- sometimes I would go down to my shop 14:21 and I would take out this bag of marijuana 14:22 and I'd smoke some and then I would feel so guilty 14:24 because I wanted to be a Christian. 14:26 And so then I would take this bag of marijuana, 14:28 I take my pipe and I'd open my shop 14:30 and we lived out in this farmland area 14:31 where had this shop at and I would take it 14:33 and I would throw it out into the felid 14:35 as far as I could and I would get on my knees 14:37 and I say, "Lord, I am not going to do this anymore." 14:42 You know, that night I would go to bed and think of myself, 14:44 I am going to be a Christian now, I really am. 14:46 And the next day I go to shop and I start working 14:48 and I start thinking to myself, 14:50 wow, it should be nice to smoke a little marijuana. 14:52 And so I'd be out there in the grass out 14:54 in the field looking around 14:55 and I would find my bag and my pipe 14:57 and I go back into my shop and smoke some more 15:00 and then I feel really guilty that I done it again. 15:02 And I take the bag and I would throw it out in the field 15:04 and get on my knees and I would pray, 15:05 "Lord, please help me not to do this anymore. 15:07 I really wanted to be a Christian." 15:09 And day after day I would keep doing this same thing, 15:13 in fact, I got where I was really good 15:14 at just taking the bag of marijuana 15:16 and strategically throwing into the grass 15:18 so could find it more conveniently the next day 15:20 just enough to help me to deal with the guilt. 15:23 And then one day a significant thing happened. 15:25 I got on my knees and I prayed, 15:26 "Lord, I don't want to do this anymore 15:28 and I want you to do whatever is necessary 15:31 to help me to quit doing this. 15:33 I don't want to be a hypocrite anymore. 15:35 I really want to be a Christian. 15:36 I took my marijuana and my pipe 15:37 and threw it into the woodstove and burned it 15:40 and I decided I really was going to be a Christian. 15:42 I started doing all the dos and the don'ts, 15:44 I got up every morning, studied my Bible, 15:46 I prayed, I went for a walk with my wife in the morning 15:49 and I tried to really be a Christian 15:51 and things were going so great. 15:52 One week went by, two weeks went by 15:54 and then one day like I was saying earlier, 15:56 I walked into the house and my wife was there 15:59 and she said something to me 16:00 and to be honest 16:01 I was being a little bit edgy, little irritable. 16:03 I was kind of feeling like I needed something more 16:05 or maybe some of you can relate to that, 16:07 that need to have something more in your life. 16:11 And she said something to me and I said something to her 16:14 and I know this never happens in your homes. 16:16 I know this is just something really rare 16:18 that just happens like happened in my home at that time. 16:20 And she said something to me and I said something to her 16:23 and she said something to me and I said something to her 16:25 and the next thing you know, we were just going at-- 16:27 we were getting really angry and talking back and forth 16:30 and all of a sudden she flipped over 16:32 and knock down some stuff off the counter 16:34 and I knocked over a lamp and we started cursing 16:37 and yelling at each other and we worked our way 16:39 into the kitchen and my wife and-- 16:42 she doesn't like me telling this part of the story and she says, 16:44 that's not exactly how it happened. 16:46 But she run over and grabbed a black cast iron frying pan. 16:50 You know ladies, what I am talking about, right 16:51 a black cast iron skillet. 16:53 And she took that skillet and she was looking at me 16:55 and she says that she wasn't intending to hit me with that 16:58 but she had that look in her eye. 17:00 And she had it in her hand like this 17:02 and she raised it up 17:03 and she slammed it down on the counter 17:05 so hard that the skillet broke in half. 17:08 Now I'm not talking about the little handle, 17:10 I'm talking about the skillet, it broke in half. 17:11 And as I was standing there I was thinking 17:13 I was really thankful that, 17:14 that was not my head that happened 17:17 that--that had hit me on. 17:19 Anyhow, I looked at her and I said, fine, 17:20 I want a divorce and she said, that's great 17:22 and I turned around and I left. 17:24 Well, I just want to share with you something, 17:27 a lot of people have this vicious cycle 17:29 that they go in because down inside 17:31 they really want to be involved with a certain type of sin 17:35 they're struggling with alcoholism, 17:37 food addictions, drug addictions but yet they feel guilty. 17:41 And so if they can create a circumstance 17:44 that can give them a justifiable reason 17:46 for going out and indulging in that sin 17:49 it helps them to deal with the guilt. 17:51 But the only problem is that once you do the sin 17:53 you'll experience the guilt again 17:55 and even thought you're subconsciously 17:56 trying to blame it on your spouse 17:58 or your work person that you work with. 18:00 You know for people say, 18:01 well, I wouldn't drink if it wasn't for-- 18:03 and they give this long list of excuses 18:05 of why they do or do the things that they do. 18:09 But you know, I saw that this vicious cycle 18:11 was taking place in my life. 18:13 I stomped out of the house and now I had a perfect excuse. 18:17 I drove about 60 miles away to a nearby town 18:20 where I was raised. 18:21 I went over to this man's house who was a drug dealer, 18:23 I knocked on his door, nobody home. 18:26 Went on to sit in my car 18:27 and as I was sitting in my car I was thinking to myself, 18:31 you know, here I am, I just told my wife 18:34 I want a divorce, here I am, 18:35 I've tried for two or three weeks to be a Christian, 18:37 I was doing really well, I was studying my Bible, 18:39 I was praying everyday. 18:41 I was really making it as a Christian, 18:42 now I'm not blowing it again. 18:44 And I thought to myself, I need to talk to somebody 18:47 and I thought who could I talk to? 18:49 It's getting late in the evening, 18:50 I thought, you know, I could go talk to my dad. 18:52 My dad had become a Seventh-day Adventist, 18:54 my mom had become a Seventh-Day Adventist. 18:55 They're people I really respected, 18:57 I saw how God changed my parents' lives. 19:00 And I thought you know, I can go talk to my father. 19:02 I had a good relationship with him. 19:04 I jumped in my 1939 Chevy with a Corvette engine 19:07 and I went flying over to my parents' house. 19:10 I walked into the house and my dad was there 19:12 and I notice something peculiar about my father. 19:15 I saw his face was all red and he was talking to me 19:18 and he tried to distract me a little bit 19:20 and made me look at some things 19:21 that he was working on in the house there 19:23 and he went over to the countertop there 19:25 and he pushed something off to the side 19:27 and threw a cloth over it. 19:28 I looked up the side of my eye 19:29 and saw that it was a glass of wine 19:32 and a bottle of wine and I realized all of a sudden, 19:35 I caught my father drinking alcohol. 19:38 And I don't know about you, how you would feel. 19:39 Here I came to get some advice from my father, 19:42 I was looking for counsel, I was looking for help. 19:44 I was struggling with the drug problem, 19:45 I was talking about divorcing my wife and I went to my dad 19:48 who was professing to be a Christian too 19:50 and here my dad was having similar struggle 19:53 just like the one I was having. 19:55 And I just looked at my dad 19:57 and this schizophrenic part of me kicked in you know, 19:59 like I heard this, you are seeing that 20:01 illustration of like a little devil sitting on one shoulder 20:03 and a little angel sitting on the other shoulder 20:06 they are talking to the person 20:07 and they are going back and forth. 20:08 It was kind of like what was going on in my head. 20:10 On one side I heard little angel 20:12 or God's voice saying something like, 20:14 you need to talk to your father, he's backslide, 20:15 you need to encourage him 20:16 because you know I was a Christian, 20:18 I wanted to help people. 20:19 I gave Bible studies and things like that 20:21 and I wanted to really try to be involved with ministry. 20:24 And then I heard the other voice say, 20:26 Jeff, remember how many times 20:27 you threw the bag out in the field 20:28 and how many times you tried to quit, you'll never quit. 20:31 And I went back and forth and back and forth 20:32 and finally I listen to the little devil 20:35 and I thought to myself you know, 20:36 I'll never quit, I'll never get the victory 20:37 and I just looked at my dad. 20:39 And he was trying to talk with me 20:40 and stuff and I just totally tuned out 20:42 and I said to him, I said, dad, I'll see you later 20:45 and I slammed the door and I left. 20:47 Got in my car, peeled out in the parking lot, 20:49 drove over to my friend's house, he was home. 20:51 I bought some cocaine and some marijuana. 20:53 I went out that night and partied, 20:54 late at night I went home and went to bed. 20:57 Next morning I went out 20:59 and I was working in my shop and fixing a car, 21:02 sanding on a car and a telephone rang. 21:05 And my dad said to me, he said-- it was my father 21:08 and he said, what are you doing today? 21:09 I said, I am just working in my shop. 21:10 He said, I'd like to come and talk with you, 21:12 are you going to be around? 21:13 I said, sure. 21:14 And so he said, I will be there in just a little while. 21:17 Couple of hours went by and the next thing 21:19 I knew my dad pulled up on his motorcycle, 21:21 he was retired now and he had a big motorcycle 21:23 he used to drive around. 21:25 He came and you know, have you ever had one of those situations 21:27 where you know you need to talk to somebody about an issue 21:30 and they know they need to talk to you about an issue 21:32 but at the same time 21:34 you are just too nervous to really talk about it, 21:36 you are afraid so you kind of beat around the bush. 21:37 And my dad talked to me about Sabbath school lesson, 21:40 he talked to me about family, he talked to me about my work. 21:42 I talked to him about motorcycles 21:45 and cars and things like that. 21:47 A couple of hours went by 21:48 and we never talked about the issue. 21:51 So finally I just you know, my-- finally my dad looked at me 21:54 and he said, hey, I got to go 21:56 and I said, okay, we'll see you later. 21:57 He got on his motorcycle and he left. 21:58 I went in and I lay down some cocaine 22:00 and consumed it and I smoke some marijuana, 22:03 I start sanding on this car and an hour went by, 22:05 two hours went by and the phone rang 22:07 and I picked up the phone 22:09 and it was a friend of mine from high school, 22:10 I hadn't talked to him for years. 22:12 He said, Jeff, I've got some bad news for you. 22:14 And I said, what's that? 22:15 He said, your father is dead. 22:17 He was killed in an accident this afternoon. 22:18 And I said, listen, Dan-- his name was Dan. 22:20 I said, Dan, this is a sick joke, 22:22 it's not fully, okay. 22:23 And he said, no, I am serious, your dad is dead. 22:24 I said, no way, he was just here. 22:26 He said your father is dead, I saw the accident. 22:28 And I said, no way, and I said, 22:30 this is not funny, and I slammed down the phone 22:32 and called my parents' house and the line was busy, 22:34 the line was busy. 22:35 And I kept trying to get through 22:37 and in desperation I called the hospital 22:39 that I knew was close by 22:40 where my parents lived and I said, 22:42 can I have ER, please and emergency room answered. 22:44 I said, has there been an accident 22:45 on such and such avenue and they said, yes, 22:48 there has been but we can not release any other information. 22:50 And so I called in desperation 22:52 one more time to my parents' home 22:53 and my mom answered and she was crying 22:55 and she said it's true, 22:57 your father was killed this afternoon. 22:59 Shortly after he had gotten home from visiting me, 23:03 he took a blind lady out to walk her down the road 23:06 and two young kids that were on drugs and alcohol 23:08 swerved off the road and they slammed into both, 23:11 my father and this elderly lady 23:12 and killed both of them instantly. 23:14 And as I was standing there in my shop 23:17 holding this telephone to my ear 23:20 I started thinking about all the things 23:21 that had transpired the last 24 hours. 23:23 And I was thinking to myself, why him and not me? 23:26 Here we're both Christians, both trying to do what's right, 23:29 trying to have a Christian experience 23:30 and now he was dead and I was alive. 23:32 You know, why him, why not me? 23:34 You know and as I was standing there, 23:37 I was holding the phone 23:38 it was like I can see my father's face 23:40 and I can look into his eyes 23:41 and I can see a reflection of myself, 23:43 a father and a son, the same kind of dilemma, 23:46 the same kind of struggle. 23:48 And as I hung up the telephone 23:51 and realize all the things that was gonna have to happen now 23:53 and making funeral arrangements and helping my mom 23:55 work though this difficult time in her life 23:57 I realize that there been something missing in my life. 24:02 I learned all these different truths 24:04 but I never learned about Him 24:07 who was the Truth with a capital "T." 24:11 I never learned really what it meant 24:12 to pick up the cross and follow Jesus. 24:16 You know, in Matthew 16:24, 24:20 Jesus said unto to His disciples, 24:24 "If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, 24:27 and take up his cross, and follow Me.'" 24:32 I would just like to ask you the question, 24:34 what does Jesus mean here 24:35 when He talks about taking up the cross? 24:38 Is He talking about putting icons 24:40 around in your house and up in your church 24:41 or is He talking about wearing little cross ear rings, 24:44 a little cross necklaces around your neck. 24:47 You know what is this cross, 24:49 the real cross that Christ is talking about? 24:51 I'll tell you what it is, it's a daily dying yourself. 24:55 You know when God reveals His will from heaven, 24:59 it's a vertical plane coming down 25:01 and that vertical plane crosses our human will. 25:04 You know we have our own motivations, 25:06 our own desires, our own inclinations, 25:08 our own selfishness 25:09 and the will of God comes to us and speaks to us. 25:12 This is the way walk in it 25:14 and it crosses our natural sinful human inclinations 25:17 and there is the cross of Christ. 25:18 It's an intersection of wills. 25:21 And so the cross of Christ is yielding your will to God. 25:25 In fact, in scriptures, it says in Galatians 6:14, 25:29 it says, "But God forbid that I should glory, 25:32 save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, 25:35 by whom the world is crucified unto me, 25:37 and I unto the world." 25:39 You see, God is calling us to make a decision to submit 25:43 and surrender our will to Him. 25:46 That's what the cross of Christ is all about. 25:48 That was the missing element that I had in my life. 25:51 I didn't understand what it meant to surrender, 25:54 to submit my will to Jesus Christ. 25:57 I had all this head knowledge 25:59 but yet it came down to these different things in my life, 26:01 I would constantly make the wrong choices 26:03 because I would refuse to follow 26:06 the injunction of Jesus Christ of taking up His cross 26:10 and following Him, picking up my cross 26:12 and following Him. 26:14 And in fact, it says in Galatians 2:20, 26:16 it says, "I am crucified with Christ, 26:19 nevertheless I live, yet not I, 26:21 but Christ liveth in me and the life 26:24 which I now live in the flesh 26:26 I live by the faith of the Son of God, 26:28 who loved me, and gave Himself for me." 26:32 I would just like to challenge you today, 26:34 have you personally taken on the cross of Christ? 26:38 Have you come to the point 26:39 where you are not just playing churchinaty, 26:42 but you really being a Christian? 26:44 Have you come to the point 26:45 where it's just not head knowledge 26:47 and have you come to the point 26:48 of really giving your heart moment by moment? 26:51 Paul says, I die daily. 26:53 Well, let's take that little bit further, 26:54 I die moment by moment 26:56 and surrendering our selfish inclination, 26:59 our selfish will to Jesus Christ. 27:01 That's my challenge to you today and that's' the challenge 27:04 that I have to face everyday in my life 27:06 because that cross never goes away. 27:09 That cross is there and you know 27:10 what is so wonderful about that cross, 27:12 is that when we submit our will to God 27:15 a supernatural power above and beyond ourselves 27:17 comes into our life to give us the ability to do that 27:20 which we normally couldn't do ourselves 27:22 and that cross all of a sudden becomes this yoke, 27:26 not a bondage 27:27 but a yoke of deliverance where we can say like David, 27:31 "I delight to do thy will O God, 27:33 for thy law is written in my heart." 27:37 If you would like to see this complete presentation, 27:39 please write or call Laymen Ministries, 27:42 414 Zapada Road, Saint Maries, Idaho, 83861 27:47 or call 1800-245-1844. 27:52 You can contact us on the web at www.lmn.org. |
Revised 2014-12-17