joining us on It Is Written
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Canada.
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There is a popular legend of
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two wolves, I'm sure you've
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heard it, it goes like this:
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An old Cherokee is teaching
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his grandson about life.
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>> "A fight is going on"
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"inside me," he said to the
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boy, "It is a terrible fight"
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"and it is between two wolves."
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>> "One is evil, he is anger,"
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"sorrow, regret, greed,"
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"self-pity, guilt,"
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"and resentment."
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>> He continued: "The other"
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"is good."
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"He is joy, peace, love,"
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"hope, humility, kindness,"
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"compassion and faith."
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>> "The same fight is going"
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"on inside you and inside"
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"every person, too," the old
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man warned his grandson.
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>> The grandson thought about
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it for a minute and then asked
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his grandfather, "Which wolf"
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"will win?"
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>> The old Cherokee simply
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replied, "The one you feed."
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>> As a Christian, I can see
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the conflict and struggle
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between the two natures:
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the old and the new nature
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or the conflict between the
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spirit and the flesh.
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>> And how do we feed
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the spirit?
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Jesus answered this question
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very clearly when He said,
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"It is the Spirit who gives"
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"life, the flesh"
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"profits nothing."
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"The words that I speak to"
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"you are spirit and they"
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"are life."
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>> The prophet, Jeremiah, also
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told us how to feed the
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spirit when he announced,
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"Your words were found and I"
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"ate them and your word was"
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"to me the joy and rejoicing"
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"of my heart."
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>> Our special guest on It Is
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Written Canada today is
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Ian McPherson, a young man who
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was once part of a gang,
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involved in a life of pain,
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anger, resentment, and
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addiction.
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In a moment you will meet Ian
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and hear his story of how he
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is now daily deciding to feed
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the spirit and starve
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the flesh.
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¤¤
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>> Welcome again to
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It Is Written Canada.
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We are in Calgary, Alberta and
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we're visiting with
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Ian McPherson.
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>> I first heard about Ian
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from his two younger brothers,
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Caleb and Jacob, when I was
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teaching Bible class at
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Fountainview Academy in
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British Columbia.
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And they would constantly say
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to me, every time there was a
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prayer request they would
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raise their hands and say,
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"Mrs. Lemon, you have to"
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"pray-- we have to pray for"
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"my br-- my older"
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"brother, Ian."
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And then eventually it was,
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"We have to pray for Ian and"
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"his little daughter," and so
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the-- we prayed for Ian and
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for his daughter
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every single time.
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And so, Ian, we're here now
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and I finally get to meet you
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and see how God has answered
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all those prayers that we were
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praying for you in our
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Bible 10 class.
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So welcome here to It Is
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Written today.
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>> Thank you.
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Thank you so much for having
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me, guys, it's a...it's a
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it's a blessing and honour
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to be here, thank you.
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>> Yeah, I remember René
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mentioning to me how your
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brothers were praying for you
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and we were all praying
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for you, so...
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And I know that, from your
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story, that you had gotten
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involved in going down a very
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dark path with gangs, but
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before we go there, it wasn't
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always like that in your life,
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you did have some good
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early years.
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You wanna take us back
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to that?
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>> Sure.
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So I was born in Red Deer,
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1991, my mom and my dad, they
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were together for the first
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three, four years of my life.
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They had their problems, stuff
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like that, they ended up
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splitting up when I was about
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four, five I think and my dad
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wasn't living a Christian
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lifestyle at that point
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until he left my mom.
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That's where they split
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because my dad decided to go
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back to the church.
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Doing that, he ended up
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meeting my stepmom, Julie.
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Being the young fellow that I
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was, I became very hurt,
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anger, upset.
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My youth, growing up, I was,
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I was a bad kid.
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I would torture my parents.
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I had a lot of pain so I
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figured if I put enough pain
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maybe my stepmom will leave
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and I can get my life back.
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And so that's kinda what I did
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and it didn't work out the
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best for me as I got older.
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I got smarter, I started doing
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things that were way worse
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than before.
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My words were weapons,
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everything I did was to hurt
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and to drive my stepmom away
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so that I could have my
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family back.
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>> So did you end up staying
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at home with your stepmom and
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your dad?
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>> No, at thirteen years old
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I ended up going to a
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foster home.
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I needed to go to the foster
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home because my parents
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couldn't afford to pay for the
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psychology, for the counselling,
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for whatever I needed
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at that point because I would
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outsmart the counsellors.
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They left me there.
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I started...I started using
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drugs, gang stuff.
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It was just hard growing up
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having all that pain in the
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heart, in the soul, resentment.
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You wanna-- I wanted to take
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it out on the world, I wanted
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to be the worst of the worst.
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My nickname was "Fez."
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I grew up in a foster home
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with all white guys, I was the
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native guy, Fez is from The
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70's Show, he's Mexican, but
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nonetheless, that was my name,
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teachers, everybody called me
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"Fez," so that was my name.
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It gave me a sense of
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belonging, especially when I
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started joining gangs, things
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like that.
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It gave me a sense of family
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that I thought they had left
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me behind, I thought God had
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left me behind, I thought
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everyone had left me behind,
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but they were praying for me
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and I'm glad because it saved
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my life.
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>> So, Ian, what was foster
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care like for you?
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>> Foster care, it was...
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It was a mixture of wanting to
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feel safe and not wanting to
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be there at all.
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It was OK, I mean in the
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house, the foster brothers and
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me, we formed a special bond.
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That was our way of coping
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with what was going on so we
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became an unbreakable force,
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all of us.
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Even though we knew this was
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all happening, we didn't wanna
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say anything about it, we just
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lived our lives the best we
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could with what was going on.
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He would use drugs and
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alcohol, money, he did
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anything he could to
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manipulate us into getting
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what he wanted.
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So with these things going on,
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he hurt us and he hurt me
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and he hurt them.
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And he just did it for his own,
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his own sake, right.
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And during that time in my
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life I was in a gang lifestyle.
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You don't talk, you don't say
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nothing, right, so when the
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cops came to ask me, "Hey,"
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"is he doing anything to you?"
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I lied.
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When the news people came,
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I lied again, protecting him
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because that was my mindset,
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it was hardwired into me.
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You don't say anything out
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there, you don't show
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emotions, you don't do
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anything like that.
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It's a dark world.
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You're not allowed to feel
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happy 'cause that's weakness,
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you're not allowed to feel
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sad, you're not allowed to be
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scared 'cause the moment you
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show fear, they'll jump on you
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and they'll take everything
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you have.
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>> So who was this person who
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was doing-- what was
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happening?
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Were they charged?
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>> Yeah, Gary was, he was
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sentenced to, I believe, ten
00:08:45.75\00:08:48.12
years in prison.
00:08:48.12\00:08:50.73
He served eight and he's out
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now, just recently got out,
00:08:52.73\00:08:55.76
but the foster brothers, like
00:08:55.76\00:08:57.60
I said, we came together.
00:08:57.60\00:08:58.97
We were a group like this.
00:08:58.97\00:09:01.40
And I'm like, "Has anything"
00:09:01.40\00:09:03.81
"happened to you guys?"
00:09:03.81\00:09:05.54
I'm like, "I'm not trying to"
00:09:05.54\00:09:06.94
"be weird about this, I just"
00:09:06.94\00:09:08.44
"want to know."
00:09:08.44\00:09:09.88
And they said, "Yes."
00:09:09.88\00:09:11.21
So we decided, let's take it
00:09:11.21\00:09:12.68
to the police.
00:09:12.68\00:09:14.02
The house was for troubled
00:09:14.75\00:09:15.88
teen boys and he played on
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that because it's where nobody
00:09:19.05\00:09:21.06
else wants them, no group
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home, no other foster home
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wants them because they're
00:09:23.93\00:09:25.13
troubled teen boys that no
00:09:25.13\00:09:26.93
one's given a shot and he used
00:09:26.93\00:09:29.20
that for himself, selfishly,
00:09:29.20\00:09:31.83
which caused a lot of anger
00:09:31.83\00:09:33.37
and pain that I wanted to
00:09:33.37\00:09:35.24
project to the world 'cause if
00:09:35.24\00:09:37.87
I have to feel it, why should
00:09:37.87\00:09:39.77
other people not feel it?
00:09:39.77\00:09:40.98
That was my logic.
00:09:40.98\00:09:42.78
My pain is your pain, everyone
00:09:42.78\00:09:44.01
needs to feel it with me.
00:09:44.01\00:09:45.81
And that's where it brought me
00:09:47.05\00:09:49.72
to, that pain, built on with
00:09:49.72\00:09:52.12
what had happened as a kid
00:09:52.12\00:09:54.82
with my mom and dad, it seemed
00:09:54.82\00:09:56.99
like the pain wasn't gonna
00:09:56.99\00:09:58.26
stop and the only way I could
00:09:58.26\00:10:00.76
get it to stop was to drink,
00:10:00.76\00:10:02.60
to do drugs, to go hurt
00:10:02.60\00:10:04.60
other people.
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To go to jail as a vacation
00:10:07.27\00:10:09.60
away from him because...
00:10:09.60\00:10:13.34
you wanna escape, you wanna
00:10:13.34\00:10:15.11
escape that.
00:10:15.11\00:10:16.88
>> So you'd rather be in jail
00:10:16.88\00:10:19.85
than with this pedophile who
00:10:19.85\00:10:21.55
was abusing you boys.
00:10:21.55\00:10:23.39
>> Yeah.
00:10:23.39\00:10:24.75
And that was the story for a
00:10:24.75\00:10:26.32
lot of us.
00:10:26.32\00:10:27.32
And unfortunately a couple of
00:10:27.32\00:10:30.09
my foster brothers overdosed
00:10:30.09\00:10:32.89
and passed away because...
00:10:32.89\00:10:34.83
Because they didn't find God
00:10:35.56\00:10:36.93
like I did.
00:10:36.93\00:10:38.17
They didn't have the chance
00:10:38.17\00:10:39.07
that I had.
00:10:39.07\00:10:40.14
>> So, Ian, can you tell us
00:10:41.20\00:10:43.07
what life was like being part
00:10:43.07\00:10:45.61
of a gang and being on the
00:10:45.61\00:10:47.28
streets and also do you have
00:10:47.28\00:10:49.94
any regrets about that time?
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>> Sure.
00:10:52.78\00:10:54.45
My life on the streets was
00:10:54.45\00:10:56.02
basically one thing: survive.
00:10:56.02\00:10:59.55
Living out there, I started my
00:10:59.55\00:11:03.69
first gang tour, you could
00:11:03.69\00:11:06.23
call it, when I was 13, 14.
00:11:06.23\00:11:08.86
So I just joined up with a
00:11:08.86\00:11:10.27
gang called DT here in Calgary.
00:11:10.27\00:11:12.60
We did everything from
00:11:14.04\00:11:15.34
stealing cars, jumping people,
00:11:15.34\00:11:16.91
robbing people, extorting
00:11:16.91\00:11:18.11
women, selling drugs, we did
00:11:18.11\00:11:19.71
it all.
00:11:19.71\00:11:20.91
So I was good at doing that
00:11:20.91\00:11:22.21
and I got better and better
00:11:22.21\00:11:23.68
at it.
00:11:23.68\00:11:24.75
People in bigger gangs started
00:11:24.75\00:11:26.21
noticing me and taking a
00:11:26.21\00:11:27.85
liking to me and starting to
00:11:27.85\00:11:29.55
try and pull me into
00:11:29.55\00:11:30.79
bigger gangs.
00:11:30.79\00:11:32.29
It's not-- the gang life,
00:11:32.29\00:11:34.52
they're like, "Yes, we're"
00:11:34.52\00:11:35.66
"bros, we're stuck together"
00:11:35.66\00:11:36.79
"we're for life," everything
00:11:36.79\00:11:38.13
like that, but when it really
00:11:38.13\00:11:39.63
comes down do it, it's not.
00:11:39.63\00:11:41.23
You're alone, there's no one
00:11:41.23\00:11:42.96
there but the Devil.
00:11:42.96\00:11:44.83
And bringing good people into
00:11:46.17\00:11:49.24
bad situations, I thought
00:11:49.24\00:11:51.57
that's what...
00:11:51.57\00:11:53.84
I thought that's what it meant
00:11:53.84\00:11:54.98
to be a good gangster, a good
00:11:54.98\00:11:56.78
thug, something that's, I don't
00:11:56.78\00:12:00.28
know, all that and a bag of
00:12:00.28\00:12:01.58
chips out on the street,
00:12:01.58\00:12:03.15
right, 'cause on the street
00:12:03.15\00:12:04.75
when you're a thug, you're a
00:12:04.75\00:12:06.22
gangster, you're crazy, people
00:12:06.22\00:12:08.12
know your name, you're
00:12:08.12\00:12:09.99
respected and left alone.
00:12:09.99\00:12:12.33
It's a survival tactic.
00:12:13.50\00:12:14.76
The worse you are, the better
00:12:14.76\00:12:16.67
off you'll be.
00:12:16.67\00:12:18.23
>> So when you look back on
00:12:19.27\00:12:20.37
that, do you have any regrets
00:12:20.37\00:12:22.27
about any of that behaviour or
00:12:22.27\00:12:24.87
activity you were involved in?
00:12:24.87\00:12:26.51
>> Yes, I do.
00:12:26.51\00:12:28.04
I regret the people I hurt,
00:12:28.04\00:12:31.15
the people that I brought down
00:12:31.15\00:12:33.62
to my level so I didn't have
00:12:33.62\00:12:35.08
to feel alone, I regret not
00:12:35.08\00:12:38.65
finding God sooner
00:12:38.65\00:12:41.76
and I regret not being able to
00:12:41.76\00:12:43.76
share God with the friends and
00:12:43.76\00:12:45.93
family that I've lost.
00:12:45.93\00:12:47.93
All my friends, they started
00:12:47.93\00:12:49.53
dropping like flies and I
00:12:49.53\00:12:50.90
regret that I wasn't able to
00:12:50.90\00:12:52.27
help them.
00:12:52.27\00:12:53.70
And anyway, I wasn't able to
00:12:53.70\00:12:55.37
help myself.
00:12:55.37\00:12:56.60
I've lost so much material
00:12:56.60\00:12:58.67
things, people, relationships,
00:12:58.67\00:13:01.71
I almost lost myself.
00:13:01.71\00:13:04.31
Almost lost myself, my life,
00:13:04.31\00:13:06.35
everything.
00:13:06.35\00:13:07.35
>> And while you were going
00:13:07.35\00:13:08.52
through that, how did you deal
00:13:08.52\00:13:09.68
with the pain?
00:13:09.68\00:13:10.62
>> I would fill my God-shaped
00:13:10.62\00:13:12.82
hole with drugs and alcohol,
00:13:12.82\00:13:14.32
it's what I thought I needed
00:13:14.32\00:13:16.16
to do, I needed to drink
00:13:16.16\00:13:18.06
my pain away.
00:13:18.06\00:13:19.46
As soon as I drink, where's
00:13:19.46\00:13:20.63
the drugs?
00:13:20.63\00:13:21.76
I still feel pain, I need
00:13:21.76\00:13:23.03
more, I need more,
00:13:23.03\00:13:24.40
I need more.
00:13:24.40\00:13:25.67
And it didn't matter how much
00:13:25.67\00:13:27.04
drugs and alcohol and nasty
00:13:27.04\00:13:28.57
things I did to people, it
00:13:28.57\00:13:30.01
didn't take the pain out of my
00:13:30.01\00:13:31.21
heart, it distracted me
00:13:31.21\00:13:32.87
temporarily so I thought it
00:13:32.87\00:13:34.21
was gone, but it was never
00:13:34.21\00:13:35.38
gone, it was always in there,
00:13:35.38\00:13:37.81
eating away at me, festering.
00:13:37.81\00:13:39.85
>> So, Ian, did you ever find
00:13:39.85\00:13:42.28
a way out?
00:13:42.28\00:13:43.95
>> I was trying to escape the
00:13:43.95\00:13:45.12
problem that was in my heart
00:13:45.12\00:13:46.96
rather than, you know,
00:13:46.96\00:13:48.76
dealing with it.
00:13:48.76\00:13:50.16
I was running around, running
00:13:50.16\00:13:51.63
here and there.
00:13:51.63\00:13:53.06
I thought maybe because I
00:13:53.06\00:13:54.30
tried fighting, that didn't
00:13:54.30\00:13:55.96
work out, maybe I should
00:13:55.96\00:13:57.23
try running.
00:13:57.23\00:13:58.67
And I went from city to city,
00:13:58.67\00:14:00.34
same problems, same people it
00:14:00.34\00:14:02.74
seemed like, I would find the
00:14:02.74\00:14:03.91
same people, same problems and
00:14:03.91\00:14:06.74
I just got sick of it, I got
00:14:06.74\00:14:08.31
tired of it, I just couldn't
00:14:08.31\00:14:09.68
do it anymore.
00:14:09.68\00:14:10.98
So...
00:14:10.98\00:14:12.18
I got to a point where I just
00:14:13.78\00:14:15.48
said, "You know what?"
00:14:15.48\00:14:17.02
"I'm done."
00:14:17.02\00:14:18.62
"I can't do this anymore."
00:14:18.62\00:14:20.02
"If I can't fight, if I can't"
00:14:20.02\00:14:21.69
"flight, what is there to do?"
00:14:21.69\00:14:24.83
And the only logical thing in
00:14:24.83\00:14:27.93
that moment was for me to
00:14:27.93\00:14:31.37
off myself.
00:14:31.37\00:14:32.60
So I'm standing there on the
00:14:33.94\00:14:35.20
edge, tenth story of this
00:14:35.20\00:14:38.27
building in Edmonton on my
00:14:38.27\00:14:39.97
aunty's balcony and I was
00:14:39.97\00:14:41.44
gonna jump off.
00:14:41.44\00:14:42.98
I remember holding the top
00:14:42.98\00:14:44.25
balcony, well, it was the roof
00:14:44.25\00:14:45.61
of the building, that's all
00:14:45.61\00:14:46.72
that was left, it was the top
00:14:46.72\00:14:47.85
floor, I remember feeling like
00:14:47.85\00:14:50.59
this kind of peace where I
00:14:50.59\00:14:52.65
just wanted to just go, but at
00:14:52.65\00:14:54.66
the same time I heard a voice
00:14:54.66\00:14:56.73
that said, "Ian,"
00:14:56.73\00:14:58.69
"look in your pocket."
00:14:58.69\00:15:01.13
I'm like, "OK," so I look in
00:15:01.13\00:15:02.63
my pocket, it's a little piece
00:15:02.63\00:15:03.80
of paper for a suicide
00:15:03.80\00:15:05.03
prevention line and I have no
00:15:05.03\00:15:06.63
idea where it came from, but
00:15:06.63\00:15:07.97
it was there.
00:15:07.97\00:15:09.10
I called them, they came and
00:15:09.10\00:15:10.54
got me and talked me down,
00:15:10.54\00:15:13.14
brought me to the hospital and
00:15:13.14\00:15:14.74
that's when I knew, I knew
00:15:14.74\00:15:17.25
that there was more to life
00:15:17.25\00:15:19.35
and that God was looking
00:15:19.35\00:15:20.52
out for me.
00:15:20.52\00:15:21.58
¤¤
00:15:21.58\00:15:36.03
¤I hear the Savior say
00:15:36.03\00:15:41.84
¤Thy strength indeed is small
00:15:41.84\00:15:47.24
¤Child of weakness
00:15:47.24\00:15:49.88
¤watch and pray
00:15:49.88\00:15:53.11
¤Find in Me thine all in all
00:15:53.11\00:15:59.65
¤Jesus paid it all
00:15:59.65\00:16:05.33
¤all to Him I owe
00:16:05.33\00:16:10.80
¤Sin had left a crimson stain
00:16:10.80\00:16:16.07
¤He washed it white as snow
00:16:16.07\00:16:22.91
¤¤
00:16:22.91\00:16:30.59
¤Lord, now indeed I find
00:16:30.59\00:16:36.26
¤Thy power and Thine alone
00:16:36.26\00:16:41.66
¤Can changed the leper's spots
00:16:41.66\00:16:46.74
¤And melt the heart of stone
00:16:46.74\00:16:53.31
¤Jesus paid it all
00:16:53.31\00:16:58.48
¤All to Him I owe
00:16:58.48\00:17:03.89
¤Sin had left a crimson stain
00:17:03.89\00:17:08.26
¤He washed it white as snow
00:17:08.26\00:17:14.73
¤¤
00:17:14.73\00:17:22.67
¤And when before the throne
00:17:22.67\00:17:28.28
¤I stand in Him complete
00:17:28.28\00:17:33.28
¤I'll lay my trophies down
00:17:33.28\00:17:38.55
¤All down at Jesus' feet
00:17:38.55\00:17:45.06
¤Jesus paid it all
00:17:45.06\00:17:50.37
¤All to Him I owe
00:17:50.37\00:17:55.70
¤Sin had left a crimson stain
00:17:55.70\00:18:03.21
¤He washed it white as snow
00:18:03.21\00:18:12.15
¤¤
00:18:12.15\00:18:27.70
>> Did you ever feel like you
00:18:27.70\00:18:29.04
had gone too far?
00:18:29.04\00:18:30.71
>> Yes, there has been times
00:18:30.71\00:18:32.27
where, you know, I've hurt
00:18:32.27\00:18:34.78
people, I've attacked them
00:18:34.78\00:18:37.81
with weapons, batons, mace,
00:18:37.81\00:18:40.75
tasers, stuff like that and
00:18:40.75\00:18:42.18
people have done it to me.
00:18:42.18\00:18:43.65
It's part of it and that kind
00:18:43.65\00:18:46.09
of stuff, it-- you have to
00:18:46.09\00:18:48.46
live with it the rest of
00:18:48.46\00:18:49.79
your days.
00:18:49.79\00:18:51.16
You have to live with the
00:18:51.16\00:18:53.16
regret and the pain and the
00:18:53.16\00:18:55.83
shame of hurting people.
00:18:55.83\00:18:58.17
For what...for what?
00:18:58.17\00:19:01.74
And there are times where I
00:19:01.74\00:19:03.71
took it too far.
00:19:03.71\00:19:05.87
And there was a time I almost
00:19:05.87\00:19:08.01
got charged with attempted
00:19:08.01\00:19:09.24
murder because I had hit
00:19:09.24\00:19:10.51
somebody so hard.
00:19:10.51\00:19:11.71
And honestly, I should have
00:19:11.71\00:19:12.95
been, I should have been
00:19:12.95\00:19:14.52
punished for that.
00:19:14.52\00:19:16.02
Things like that, you
00:19:16.02\00:19:17.32
shouldn't do that to people.
00:19:17.32\00:19:19.25
It's not the way God created
00:19:19.25\00:19:20.86
us, He created us to love, not
00:19:20.86\00:19:22.66
to hate, not to hurt.
00:19:22.66\00:19:25.49
And that's all that's out
00:19:25.49\00:19:26.59
there and it's discouraging in
00:19:26.59\00:19:28.33
that world 'cause that's all
00:19:28.33\00:19:29.93
you see, day in, day out.
00:19:29.93\00:19:31.97
How am I gonna survive today
00:19:31.97\00:19:33.40
in this darkness, this hate,
00:19:33.40\00:19:35.77
this pool of anger and evil?
00:19:35.77\00:19:38.31
>> And so after that evening
00:19:39.24\00:19:41.31
when your life was saved from
00:19:41.31\00:19:44.71
suicide, God came close to you.
00:19:44.71\00:19:47.78
Did He come close to
00:19:47.78\00:19:49.32
you again?
00:19:49.32\00:19:50.32
>> Yes, He did.
00:19:50.32\00:19:51.52
There was another time.
00:19:52.15\00:19:53.42
This was after I had been
00:19:53.42\00:19:54.62
sober for about a year.
00:19:54.62\00:19:57.39
Because drugs and alcohol had
00:19:58.83\00:20:00.03
been taken off the table,
00:20:00.03\00:20:02.66
I still had issues inside my
00:20:02.66\00:20:05.33
heart, inside my mind that I
00:20:05.33\00:20:07.97
hadn't dealt with so I figured
00:20:07.97\00:20:10.87
suicide would be the best way
00:20:10.87\00:20:12.21
to get rid it.
00:20:12.21\00:20:13.17
Drugs and alcohol, I can't
00:20:13.17\00:20:14.68
escape anymore, this is the
00:20:14.68\00:20:16.71
only escape for me.
00:20:16.71\00:20:18.61
So I was sitting in my living
00:20:18.61\00:20:19.91
room with a shotgun in my
00:20:19.91\00:20:21.25
mouth and I was about to pull
00:20:21.25\00:20:23.69
the trigger and I feel this
00:20:23.69\00:20:25.75
glow come into the room like,
00:20:25.75\00:20:28.99
it's kinda-- I don't know how
00:20:28.99\00:20:30.16
to describe it, it was like an
00:20:30.16\00:20:31.59
orange-y glow.
00:20:31.59\00:20:33.06
And then the most peaceful,
00:20:33.06\00:20:36.00
calming, relaxing voice just
00:20:36.00\00:20:37.97
says to me, "Ian, this isn't"
00:20:37.97\00:20:40.07
"the end."
00:20:40.07\00:20:41.74
"Your plans, there's so many"
00:20:41.74\00:20:43.00
"more plans for you."
00:20:43.00\00:20:44.91
"Don't do this."
00:20:44.91\00:20:47.21
And it just felt like, it's
00:20:47.21\00:20:49.01
giving be goosebumps 'cause it
00:20:49.01\00:20:50.58
was so calming, but I was
00:20:50.58\00:20:52.25
scared because I've never
00:20:52.25\00:20:53.72
heard that before.
00:20:53.72\00:20:55.22
But I felt so...
00:20:55.22\00:20:57.02
I can't describe it, I've
00:20:58.85\00:21:00.36
never felt a feeling like that
00:21:00.36\00:21:01.76
before in my life.
00:21:01.76\00:21:03.99
And since that moment it's lit
00:21:03.99\00:21:06.06
something inside of me,
00:21:06.06\00:21:08.26
something that hasn't been
00:21:08.26\00:21:09.33
extinguished no matter what
00:21:09.33\00:21:10.87
bad things have happened, and
00:21:10.87\00:21:12.10
there has been a lot, but
00:21:12.10\00:21:14.64
God has saved me.
00:21:14.64\00:21:18.01
God saved me that day, it was
00:21:18.01\00:21:19.87
something I can never put into
00:21:19.87\00:21:22.01
words, it's something that I
00:21:22.01\00:21:24.75
just wish everyone could feel,
00:21:24.75\00:21:26.68
I want everyone to feel that
00:21:26.68\00:21:27.98
feeling, it was-- it saved me,
00:21:27.98\00:21:30.25
God saved me.
00:21:30.25\00:21:32.29
>> Ian, in your addictions,
00:21:32.29\00:21:34.22
you were that child of
00:21:34.22\00:21:35.79
weakness and God was there for
00:21:35.79\00:21:37.76
you and Jesus is still there
00:21:37.76\00:21:39.19
for you, washing you
00:21:39.19\00:21:40.63
white as snow.
00:21:40.63\00:21:42.00
I wanna ask you, how was God
00:21:42.00\00:21:43.33
there for you?
00:21:43.33\00:21:44.90
Give us some details of that.
00:21:44.90\00:21:47.47
>> Well, the first one was
00:21:47.47\00:21:49.90
when He saved me from the
00:21:49.90\00:21:51.97
suicides.
00:21:51.97\00:21:53.51
And then, you know, when I was
00:21:54.61\00:21:56.11
in detox, there was-- all the
00:21:56.11\00:21:58.75
signs were there.
00:21:58.75\00:22:00.15
I'm in detox, "OK, you can"
00:22:00.15\00:22:02.28
"stay an extra few days,"
00:22:02.28\00:22:03.82
whereas anybody else, no.
00:22:03.82\00:22:05.65
"Ian, we got you a door-to-"
00:22:05.65\00:22:07.02
"door ride from detox to"
00:22:07.02\00:22:09.66
"Grace House in Drumheller"
00:22:09.66\00:22:11.16
"so you can go to treatment."
00:22:11.16\00:22:12.93
Things just started falling
00:22:12.93\00:22:14.00
into place and I knew that it
00:22:14.00\00:22:15.73
was God guiding me the whole
00:22:15.73\00:22:17.73
way, it gave me so much hope
00:22:17.73\00:22:20.04
and excitement, I knew I was
00:22:20.04\00:22:21.44
on the right path.
00:22:21.44\00:22:22.87
And today I'm sober, still
00:22:22.87\00:22:25.21
sober, I'm in contact with my
00:22:25.21\00:22:27.08
parents, I'm in contact with
00:22:27.08\00:22:28.81
my daughter again, I have a
00:22:28.81\00:22:30.35
job, full-time job, I have a
00:22:30.35\00:22:32.18
place to live, I have food in
00:22:32.18\00:22:34.05
the fridge, everything is the
00:22:34.05\00:22:37.25
way it should be because God
00:22:37.25\00:22:38.75
has saved me again.
00:22:38.75\00:22:39.95
>> So, Ian, can you tell us
00:22:39.95\00:22:41.26
what your relationship is like
00:22:41.26\00:22:42.82
now with your step-mom?
00:22:42.82\00:22:44.93
>> For sure.
00:22:44.93\00:22:46.09
Actually, since this process
00:22:46.09\00:22:49.06
has all started, I've become
00:22:49.06\00:22:51.13
very close with my stepmom.
00:22:51.13\00:22:53.70
We love each other very much.
00:22:53.70\00:22:55.70
This last Mother's Day I
00:22:55.70\00:22:57.01
actually sent a text to her
00:22:57.01\00:22:58.91
saying, "Thank you for"
00:22:58.91\00:23:00.78
"putting up with me as a kid,"
00:23:00.78\00:23:03.18
"I can't imagine that was easy."
00:23:03.18\00:23:05.81
"Thank you for praying for me"
00:23:05.81\00:23:07.28
"and not ever giving up"
00:23:07.28\00:23:09.15
"and thank you, Mom and Dad,"
00:23:09.15\00:23:11.59
"for showing me the way"
00:23:11.59\00:23:12.85
"to live."
00:23:12.85\00:23:14.32
'Cause even though I started
00:23:14.32\00:23:16.83
feeding the right wolf, it
00:23:16.83\00:23:19.36
takes-- you have to know where
00:23:19.36\00:23:21.70
to go and if it wasn't for my
00:23:21.70\00:23:23.73
mom and dad showing me where
00:23:23.73\00:23:25.63
to go, how to live after
00:23:25.63\00:23:28.20
getting past the hard part of,
00:23:28.20\00:23:30.47
you know, getting out of
00:23:30.47\00:23:31.87
addiction and off the streets,
00:23:31.87\00:23:33.81
they showed me how to live.
00:23:33.81\00:23:35.94
They showed me, "Go back to"
00:23:35.94\00:23:37.38
"church, Ian," you know,
00:23:37.38\00:23:39.31
"Follow Jesus, make Him 100%"
00:23:39.31\00:23:41.18
"of your life and He will"
00:23:41.18\00:23:43.49
"make you 100% of His life"
00:23:43.49\00:23:45.65
"and together you guys can"
00:23:45.65\00:23:46.99
"do so much."
00:23:46.99\00:23:48.89
So having my parents set that
00:23:48.89\00:23:50.86
example at a young age was the
00:23:50.86\00:23:52.89
game-changer 'cause even
00:23:52.89\00:23:55.03
though I went out on my own, I
00:23:55.03\00:23:56.77
fed the other wolf, did the
00:23:56.77\00:23:58.43
dark thing for a while,
00:23:58.43\00:24:00.37
I still knew how and where to
00:24:00.37\00:24:02.74
come back and with God pushing
00:24:02.74\00:24:05.84
me and with the prayers from
00:24:05.84\00:24:07.21
my friends and family,
00:24:07.21\00:24:09.94
it saved me.
00:24:09.94\00:24:11.85
And nowadays, you should see
00:24:11.85\00:24:13.18
the friends that I have, it's
00:24:13.18\00:24:14.85
a completely different friend
00:24:14.85\00:24:16.08
set, I'm going to church, I
00:24:16.08\00:24:18.79
read my Bible every day, it's...
00:24:18.79\00:24:20.96
it's been freeing.
00:24:21.56\00:24:23.16
I feel like I've been...
00:24:23.16\00:24:25.86
washed and freed of everything
00:24:25.86\00:24:28.73
that was holding me down and I
00:24:28.73\00:24:31.73
really pray that everyone that
00:24:31.73\00:24:33.84
is stuck in a situation like
00:24:33.84\00:24:34.94
this can feel this feeling
00:24:34.94\00:24:37.14
of peace, of happiness,
00:24:37.14\00:24:40.48
serenity, freedom.
00:24:40.48\00:24:42.48
I-- now I don't have fear.
00:24:44.21\00:24:47.88
I don't have fear 'cause I
00:24:47.88\00:24:49.28
have God.
00:24:49.28\00:24:50.69
And fear, I never knew how
00:24:50.69\00:24:55.22
much it controlled my life.
00:24:55.22\00:24:57.83
It did, but now with God in my
00:24:57.83\00:24:59.66
life and with everyone else in
00:24:59.66\00:25:02.23
my life, my family, my new
00:25:02.23\00:25:03.90
friends, my new job,
00:25:03.90\00:25:05.83
everything, God has blessed me
00:25:05.83\00:25:07.34
in more ways than I can count
00:25:07.34\00:25:09.37
so I would love to, you know,
00:25:09.37\00:25:11.67
give that to other people, too,
00:25:11.67\00:25:13.88
and to my daughter.
00:25:13.88\00:25:15.34
I wanna show her the same life
00:25:15.34\00:25:16.91
that was shown to me,
00:25:16.91\00:25:19.38
that way she can be safe, too.
00:25:19.38\00:25:22.88
And I just-- I hope that
00:25:22.88\00:25:25.89
some-- that people can
00:25:25.89\00:25:27.22
find hope.
00:25:27.22\00:25:28.66
I made a YouTube channel
00:25:28.66\00:25:30.03
called "Ian's Channel of Hope"
00:25:30.03\00:25:31.63
because I just want people to
00:25:31.63\00:25:32.76
have hope, too.
00:25:32.76\00:25:34.10
>> That's beautiful.
00:25:34.10\00:25:35.76
So we've come to our end of
00:25:35.76\00:25:37.17
our time here together and I
00:25:37.17\00:25:38.33
thank you, Ian.
00:25:38.33\00:25:39.10
I wonder if you could have a
00:25:39.10\00:25:40.14
prayer for us as we close.
00:25:40.14\00:25:41.67
>> Of course.
00:25:41.67\00:25:42.84
Dear Heavenly Father,
00:25:44.17\00:25:46.37
I thank You so much for
00:25:46.37\00:25:48.88
bringing us together
00:25:48.88\00:25:50.28
today, Lord.
00:25:50.28\00:25:51.65
I thank You so much for
00:25:51.65\00:25:52.88
everything that You've done in
00:25:52.88\00:25:53.95
each of our lives, Lord, and I
00:25:53.95\00:25:55.08
pray that You can help the
00:25:55.08\00:25:56.85
people that are out there
00:25:56.85\00:25:58.15
suffering still, Lord.
00:25:58.15\00:25:59.92
Show them Your light, show
00:25:59.92\00:26:01.29
them Your love, show them the
00:26:01.29\00:26:02.79
hope that's out there to be
00:26:02.79\00:26:04.26
had, Lord.
00:26:04.26\00:26:05.76
In a world of darkness, that's
00:26:05.76\00:26:07.13
what we need, we need You more
00:26:07.13\00:26:08.30
than ever, Lord, and please
00:26:08.30\00:26:10.87
bless these people, too.
00:26:10.87\00:26:12.80
Thank You so much for
00:26:12.80\00:26:14.60
everything and I just wanna
00:26:14.60\00:26:17.11
pray that You keep them safe
00:26:17.11\00:26:19.01
and keep them healthy and keep
00:26:19.01\00:26:21.21
them strong and keep bringing
00:26:21.21\00:26:23.38
Your word to the people, Lord.
00:26:23.38\00:26:25.68
Thank You so much for this and
00:26:25.68\00:26:26.68
I ask You in Jesus' name, amen.
00:26:26.68\00:26:28.22
[MIKE & RENÉ] Amen.
00:26:28.22\00:26:29.65
>> Thank you, Ian, so much for
00:26:29.65\00:26:31.05
coming to It Is Written Canada
00:26:31.05\00:26:32.59
and for sharing your story.
00:26:32.59\00:26:33.79
>> Thank you for having me,
00:26:33.79\00:26:34.82
you guys.
00:26:34.82\00:26:35.99
It's been a great time.
00:26:35.99\00:26:37.79
>> Friends, freedom of choice
00:26:37.79\00:26:39.69
is one of the most precious
00:26:39.69\00:26:41.16
gifts God has entrusted to us.
00:26:41.16\00:26:44.90
Unfortunately, we often make
00:26:44.90\00:26:47.30
poor choices which may lead to
00:26:47.30\00:26:49.50
destructive habits that
00:26:49.50\00:26:51.31
enslave us, damage our health,
00:26:51.31\00:26:54.31
and even ruin our lives.
00:26:54.31\00:26:56.28
>> So our free offer for you
00:26:56.28\00:26:58.15
is this special Steps To
00:26:58.15\00:27:00.05
Christ Recovery Edition.
00:27:00.05\00:27:02.35
This powerful book includes a
00:27:02.35\00:27:04.92
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00:27:04.92\00:27:06.99
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00:27:06.99\00:27:08.79
harmful habits and addictions.
00:27:08.79\00:27:10.79
Above all, you will come to
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know Jesus Christ, the only
00:27:12.29\00:27:14.36
One who can heal and restore,
00:27:14.36\00:27:16.56
strengthen and encourage as
00:27:16.56\00:27:18.80
well as bring true balance and
00:27:18.80\00:27:21.07
meaning to your life.
00:27:21.07\00:27:23.71
>> To request today's offer,
00:27:23.71\00:27:24.84
just log onto
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www.ItIsWrittenCanada.ca.
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That's www.ItIsWrittenCanada.ca.
00:27:29.94\00:27:34.05
If you prefer, you may call
00:27:34.05\00:27:35.88
toll-free at 1-888-CALL-IIW.
00:27:35.88\00:27:39.79
That's 1-888-CALL-IIW.
00:27:39.79\00:27:43.06
Call any time!
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Lines are open 24 hours daily.
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That's 1-888-CALL-IIW.
00:27:46.73\00:27:49.66
>> Before you go, we would
00:27:49.66\00:27:51.17
also like to invite you to
00:27:51.17\00:27:52.97
follow us on Instagram and
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00:27:56.50\00:27:58.51
listen to our Podcasts.
00:27:58.51\00:28:00.84
And if you go to our website,
00:28:00.84\00:28:02.71
you can see our latest
00:28:02.71\00:28:04.18
programs including our cooking
00:28:04.18\00:28:05.68
demonstrations, our short
00:28:05.68\00:28:07.72
spiritual messages entitled,
00:28:07.72\00:28:09.92
Daily Living, and our exercise
00:28:09.92\00:28:11.82
workouts called
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Experiencing Life.
00:28:13.46\00:28:15.29
>> We want you to experience
00:28:15.29\00:28:17.23
the truth found in the words
00:28:17.23\00:28:18.89
of Jesus when He said,
00:28:18.89\00:28:21.63
"It is written, man shall not"
00:28:21.63\00:28:23.83
"live by bread alone, but by"
00:28:23.83\00:28:26.17
"every word that proceeds"
00:28:26.17\00:28:28.17
"out of the mouth of God."
00:28:28.17\00:28:30.81
¤¤
00:28:30.81\00:28:57.10