¤¤ ¤¤ 00:01:19.97\00:01:36.36 >> Dear friend, thank you for watching "It Is Written Canada." 00:01:36.36\00:01:39.63 We are in part 2 of a series on sex and mental health. To help me along in this topic, 00:01:39.63\00:01:46.84 want to welcome our guest, Dr. Neil Nedley. Dr. Nedley, thank 00:01:46.84\00:01:51.14 you for being here with us again. >> Thank you. It's great 00:01:51.14\00:01:54.18 to be here. >> You know, Dr. Nedley, just very briefly, want to talk about your work as the 00:01:54.18\00:01:59.15 president of Weimar Institute, an institute of learning, an institute of healing. 00:01:59.15\00:02:04.05 Somebody wants to find more information about Weimar, they're a student interested in 00:02:04.05\00:02:09.22 pursuing some of your programs or they are a patient interested in experiencing healing for all 00:02:09.22\00:02:15.93 kinds of different diseases, where would they go to find out information about Weimar? 00:02:15.93\00:02:21.54 >> Weimar.edu for the students and NewStart.org for those 00:02:21.54\00:02:27.14 wanting to go to the health sites. >> And I'll tell you, 00:02:27.14\00:02:31.15 I've been to Weimar. It is a fantastic place up in the 00:02:31.15\00:02:35.48 mountains there. And wonderful walking trails, wonderful accommodations, fantastic meals, 00:02:35.48\00:02:42.89 good company, and a wonderful staff there. So I would encourage people to check out 00:02:42.89\00:02:46.86 Weimar. >> It really is healing a hurting world. >> Absolutely. 00:02:46.86\00:02:51.10 Now, Dr. Nedley, we are in part 2 of this topic. And to our 00:02:51.10\00:02:57.61 audience, we're dealing with a mature topic, but we are dealing with it in an appropriate way, 00:02:57.61\00:03:04.48 and so, as we talk about sex and mental health, it seems that the world is just spiraling out of 00:03:04.48\00:03:14.29 control when it comes to this issue of sexual problems and sexually related problems. 00:03:14.29\00:03:22.33 Is there a solution to all this sex problem? >> There is a 00:03:22.33\00:03:28.90 solution. But first, we need to understand the problem more. 00:03:28.90\00:03:33.27 But, yes, there's actually a solution that's not near as 00:03:33.27\00:03:37.01 difficult as what people might think. One of the issues that's 00:03:37.01\00:03:42.08 facing us today with this sexual revolution is that marriage is at an all-time low. 00:03:42.08\00:03:49.06 One out of three people, in their 20s in Canada and the United States, will never get 00:03:49.06\00:03:56.80 married. And out of those that do, the divorce rates, of 00:03:56.80\00:04:02.17 course, are high, and so there's a lot of singleness from 00:04:02.17\00:04:06.68 divorce, as well. And this is a dramatic change from the way it was a generation or two ago and 00:04:06.68\00:04:13.38 even more dramatic from multiple generations ago, before the sexual revolution materialized. 00:04:13.38\00:04:20.79 >> And let's talk about that a little bit, because, you know, it used to be that there was, 00:04:20.79\00:04:27.60 really, a process of individuals in pursuit and things like that, and you've been showing me some 00:04:27.60\00:04:34.84 of the literature, where they talked about, in days past, there used to be what was called 00:04:34.84\00:04:42.11 costly sex. Why don't you talk a little bit about that and what 00:04:42.11\00:04:47.12 has actually transitioned over the course of time? >> Yeah, well, in the days of 00:04:47.12\00:04:52.02 costly sex, females, who were the natural gatekeepers of this area, would make a man wait 00:04:52.02\00:05:03.53 until marriage until he could have sex. And, of course, there 00:05:03.53\00:05:08.90 was no pornography back then, or very little of it. There wasn't the ways of getting 00:05:08.90\00:05:16.34 sex that there is today. And so, in order for a man to get that, 00:05:16.34\00:05:22.98 he had to be respectable, he had to be clean, he had to have a good job, he had to have some 00:05:22.98\00:05:30.79 sort of career where the woman felt secure, and then, marriage would take place, and then sex 00:05:30.79\00:05:37.33 would occur. We would call that costly sex. And in the era of costly sex, marriages stayed 00:05:37.33\00:05:43.94 together much more, as well. The divorce rates were far lower. 00:05:43.94\00:05:47.98 But, you know, along came the free love movement. You know, 00:05:47.98\00:05:53.85 the Beatles helped start it and the rock 'n' roll movement and those sorts of things. 00:05:53.85\00:05:57.52 And free love, the encouragement was, "Women, you need to be more 00:05:57.52\00:06:02.89 free about this. You know, it shouldn't be costly. So the real 00:06:02.89\00:06:06.86 word, or the real phrase that should've been used instead of "free love" should've been 00:06:06.86\00:06:13.07 "cheap sex." And so, since women were supposed to, you know, participate in this just as much 00:06:13.07\00:06:20.41 as men wanted them to do so, we started to run into the problems 00:06:20.41\00:06:28.28 of cheap sex. First, you had oral contraceptives, where there weren't going to be 00:06:28.28\00:06:31.55 consequences. And then, later on the line, you had pornography. 00:06:31.55\00:06:35.59 And then you had the ability of getting sex just about anywhere, in front of any screen with 00:06:35.59\00:06:41.03 masturbation and those sorts of things, and as a result, men are not interested in marriage like 00:06:41.03\00:06:48.27 they were before. And it's very clear -- the studies show women 00:06:48.27\00:06:53.71 who are single, under 40, have a much greater desire to be married than men who are under 00:06:53.71\00:06:59.95 40 and are single. And so, you know, in reality, men control the marriage market. 00:06:59.95\00:07:07.12 And as a result, women have lost, to a great degree, as a result of this cheap-sex 00:07:07.12\00:07:14.60 movement. >> And despite that, it is interesting, because in 00:07:14.60\00:07:22.00 our last program, we talked a lot about the male libido and the real challenge with men 00:07:22.00\00:07:30.65 having an unhealthy relationship to sex and the idea of sex. It's not just a problem for men, 00:07:30.65\00:07:37.05 though, is it? >> No. You know, we talked about 00:07:37.05\00:07:40.62 masturbation being at an all-time high in men. It's also at an all-time high in 00:07:40.62\00:07:45.39 women, as well. And studies show 30% -- almost 1/3 -- of women 00:07:45.39\00:07:51.10 have masturbated in the last six days. And as a result of this 00:07:51.10\00:07:56.00 cheap-sex movement, they also are running into the three adverse brain changes that take 00:07:56.00\00:08:04.08 place from supernormal stimuli or having sex too frequently. >> So, let's talk about that. 00:08:04.08\00:08:10.82 You've used that before -- supernormal stimuli. >> Yes. 00:08:10.82\00:08:14.92 >> What do you mean by that? >> Well, supernormal stimuli means having sex too often, and 00:08:14.92\00:08:19.63 we define that particularly if you're having it more than every four days, although, ideally, we 00:08:19.63\00:08:24.57 can get more brain-chemistry benefit by waiting an entire seven days or a little more. 00:08:24.57\00:08:31.54 But, also, it's sex acts that are supernormal -- in other words, not the natural sex acts. 00:08:31.54\00:08:40.95 And, of course, one of the reasons why people progress into the supernormal stimuli is, 00:08:40.95\00:08:46.35 they're not able to climax anymore when they are doing either too frequently or using 00:08:46.35\00:08:53.33 these supernormal methods. They're going to have to try to use even more and more 00:08:53.33\00:08:58.83 supernormal methods in order to even climax and have the relaxing opioid effect. 00:08:58.83\00:09:05.57 >> And so, is this seemingly vicious cycle that an individual seems to need a more frequent 00:09:05.57\00:09:15.38 bas-- more frequent times of sex or a more extreme experience in that sex to have pleasure, but, 00:09:15.38\00:09:23.83 in fact, by doing so too frequently or more intensely, so to speak, you're actually 00:09:23.83\00:09:32.03 decreasing the ability to have enjoyment or pleasure? >> 00:09:32.03\00:09:38.14 Exactly. They're decreasing their pleasure significantly, and they have to orchestrate all 00:09:38.14\00:09:43.48 sorts of things, you know, in order to try to climax. And you'll see these things -- 00:09:43.48\00:09:50.82 the swapping of mates and all sorts of types of things that are happening with the novelty 00:09:50.82\00:09:57.29 aspect in order to try to undergo this experience, which was unnecessary when sex was 00:09:57.29\00:10:04.47 costly. >> And so, for the individual that's watching -- 00:10:04.47\00:10:08.40 and maybe there's somebody watching, saying, "I'm not really buying into this, Dr. 00:10:08.40\00:10:11.81 Nedley. I don't think it's possible to have too much sex." Let's talk about it. 00:10:11.81\00:10:14.71 And we talked about this in the last program, but I think it's important to review. 00:10:14.71\00:10:18.68 What three changes are happening to an individual that is having too much sex or too much 00:10:18.68\00:10:25.65 supernormal activity when it comes to sex? >> Well, first of 00:10:25.65\00:10:31.66 all, there's a desensitization, and this is what we talked about earlier, but there's actually 00:10:31.66\00:10:39.17 receptors that are going down. Your dopamine receptors are going down and your D2 receptors 00:10:39.17\00:10:43.67 are going down. And the reason why we have the desire to pursue 00:10:43.67\00:10:48.24 sex to begin with actually has to do with dopamine. And so -- 00:10:48.24\00:10:53.21 And when those dopamine receptors go down, more pleasure has led now to less pleasure. 00:10:53.21\00:10:59.62 And the person now begins to seek out things and sexual experiences and decrease their 00:10:59.62\00:11:09.43 motivation for other areas of life that they used to have engaging interest and motivation 00:11:09.43\00:11:14.77 in. And so, that desensitization is not a healthy thing. 00:11:14.77\00:11:21.48 And then, on top of that, they become more sensitized, as far as the usual nuisances of life. 00:11:21.48\00:11:27.95 And so they become much more irritable, they're much more able to or easily fly off the 00:11:27.95\00:11:34.56 handle, anxiety levels go up. And you'll notice that they're in that stage when common, 00:11:34.56\00:11:41.83 everyday conversation can sometimes have sexual connotations for them. 00:11:41.83\00:11:46.63 And they're twisting things over into sexual connotations. This is where you have sexual 00:11:46.63\00:11:51.47 harassment in the workplace. Sexual harassment in the workplace would never happen if 00:11:51.47\00:11:55.98 the people were not in that stage of the "too much sex" or the "too stimulating" of sex. 00:11:55.98\00:12:02.88 And so, all of those problems with the #MeToo movement and all of this, this is underneath it, 00:12:02.88\00:12:08.06 what's actually driving it. And then, the third aspect is, the 00:12:08.06\00:12:13.63 hypofrontality. This is where the gray matter in the frontal lobe shrinks, and so the person 00:12:13.63\00:12:18.80 has a decreased ability to foresee consequences. And it also can have some thinking 00:12:18.80\00:12:26.21 problems with them. This is where they are not able to make really sound decisions anymore 00:12:26.21\00:12:33.01 and they're much more likely to relapse into a previous addiction when their frontal 00:12:33.01\00:12:39.25 lobe goes down. >> And so, we have this -- just this vicious cycle of -- and I don't want to 00:12:39.25\00:12:46.73 overstate the case -- that starts with, really, an addiction -- an addiction to 00:12:46.73\00:12:52.90 sex, whether that be intimacy with someone too frequently, whether that be self-intimacy 00:12:52.90\00:12:58.94 through masturbation or through the viewing of pornography, it begins with this addiction. 00:12:58.94\00:13:04.01 And as that addiction advances, it creates the desensitization, the sensitizing, and then a 00:13:04.01\00:13:14.49 frontal lobe that shrinks and actually causes you to continue to make poor decisions. 00:13:14.49\00:13:20.73 And there have been some well-documented cases in the news of individuals whose 00:13:20.73\00:13:26.47 behaviors are so absolutely bizarre. You say, "How is that 00:13:26.47\00:13:32.07 possible?" But in understanding what you're teaching us, it actually is not really that 00:13:32.07\00:13:39.28 bizarre when you understand this cycle of desensitization, sensitizing, and the shrinking 00:13:39.28\00:13:44.52 -- >> And the hypofrontality. >> And hypofrontality. >> Yeah. And, you know, what 00:13:44.52\00:13:49.42 we're seeing in this #MeToo movement is actually just the tip of the iceberg. 00:13:49.42\00:13:54.96 These are the ones that are actually talking and coming 00:13:54.96\00:14:00.27 forward with this. But underneath it, there's a far bigger picture here that many 00:14:00.27\00:14:07.14 people, unfortunately, are identifying with, and they don't know how to get out of this 00:14:07.14\00:14:12.28 cycle. >> And want to talk about that there is hope to come out of that cycle, but we begin -- 00:14:12.28\00:14:18.29 and when I use the word "understand," I want to be very clear -- not excusing -- but you 00:14:18.29\00:14:23.89 begin to understand why we've arrived where we have. >> 00:14:23.89\00:14:26.86 Correct. >> And these poor victims, and just not too long ago, in Michigan, there was a 00:14:26.86\00:14:33.27 doctor with some very deviant behaviors, but you begin to understand this just spiral of 00:14:33.27\00:14:40.94 not getting help, where it's going to eventually lead to extremely unhealthy situations 00:14:40.94\00:14:48.45 when it comes to sex and mental health. >> Mm-hmm. 00:14:48.45\00:14:51.09 >> So, now, one of the things that I think it's important for us to talk to as we're -- talk 00:14:51.09\00:14:55.92 about, rather, as we are discussing this is, dopamine. >> 00:14:55.92\00:15:01.50 Mm-hmm. >> So, you talked about dopamine. And is dopamine a bad 00:15:01.50\00:15:05.87 thing? >> No, dopamine is actually a good thing. It's our 00:15:05.87\00:15:09.90 seeking chemical. It's what makes us want to have interest and to seek out things. And so, 00:15:09.90\00:15:17.08 there's a dopamine reward system in our brain implanted in regards to sex but not just sex. 00:15:17.08\00:15:25.55 Food, for instance, also has that dopamine response. And so we can also get into 00:15:25.55\00:15:31.79 unhealthy food just like we can get into unhealthy sex. For instance, you know, in 00:15:31.79\00:15:38.67 regards to the dopamine surge that occurs, when we eat celery, 00:15:38.67\00:15:45.67 not so much. Chocolate cake and ice cream? A big blast. And so, even when we're full and 00:15:45.67\00:15:51.75 we've had satiety, when someone presents us with a tantalizing dessert, the dopamine reward 00:15:51.75\00:15:59.79 circuitry starts to surge, and then, we can actually make a decision to have this 00:15:59.79\00:16:06.03 tantalizing dessert despite what our rational brain might think 00:16:06.03\00:16:12.03 about overeating. Or, of course, infidelity. And this is where we can get ourself in that vicious 00:16:12.03\00:16:17.21 cycle that can lead to the obesity epidemic, as well. >> And it would almost -- 00:16:17.21\00:16:21.68 And I don't want to overstate, and I hate to invent a word, but you talked about being satiated 00:16:21.68\00:16:28.78 and having satiation, you're full. >> Mm-hmm. 00:16:28.78\00:16:33.29 But there's that cake, and my desire for that cake and the desire to experience the 00:16:33.29\00:16:38.93 dopamine boost outweighs -- no pun intended -- the fact that my belly is already full? 00:16:38.93\00:16:45.73 >> Correct. >> In the same way, can we become sexually satiated 00:16:45.73\00:16:51.57 and then have a desire for inappropriate and unusual and 00:16:51.57\00:16:56.34 bizarre activity? >> Absolutely. We call that the Coolidge 00:16:56.34\00:16:59.25 effect. And what happens is, sexual satiation lasts for four days in someone who's doing it 00:16:59.25\00:17:06.52 healthfully. So, within four days of the act, they really 00:17:06.52\00:17:11.56 don't have much desire, but if there's a tantalizing presentation of some sort, 00:17:11.56\00:17:17.77 which, of course, the media can present with or some provocatively clothed female 00:17:17.77\00:17:23.74 who's dancing in a certain way right in front of the man, even though their rational brain 00:17:23.74\00:17:29.21 isn't for infidelity, there's a temptation for them to imbibe, and when they do, that's when 00:17:29.21\00:17:35.45 they're gonna have those three adverse brain changes. So the sexual satiation is there so 00:17:35.45\00:17:40.62 that we don't overdo it. It's a protective mechanism. And sexual satiation will actually drive 00:17:40.62\00:17:46.86 mates apart. This is one of the reasons why the lingerie business has made it in the 00:17:46.86\00:17:51.80 marriage world, because if you want to do it more frequently, in order to be able to have that 00:17:51.80\00:17:57.07 libido, it has to be presented in a novel way. And so you need the new outfit, make it look 00:17:57.07\00:18:02.91 like a new type of thing, and, of course, people think they're benefiting from that on the 00:18:02.91\00:18:07.88 short term, but on the long term, when they're doing it more than every four days, it is 00:18:07.88\00:18:12.65 going to produce those three adverse brain changes. >> And let's talk about that -- 00:18:12.65\00:18:16.26 the four stages of marriage. Because, again, it'll help an individual understand what's 00:18:16.26\00:18:20.66 happening in a relationship as we start having these unhealthy relationships to sex. 00:18:20.66\00:18:24.90 What are those four stages that individuals go through? Well, 00:18:24.90\00:18:29.64 the first stage of marriage is a stage of euphoria. And this is also driven by a healthy 00:18:29.64\00:18:35.68 chemical called phenylethylamine. When we get a new relationship -- and, by the 00:18:35.68\00:18:39.51 way, we didn't go through all the dopamine things. We talk about food and sex, but 00:18:39.51\00:18:42.95 friendship is one of the things that can drive dopamine. >> 00:18:42.95\00:18:46.45 Okay. >> Love, that's really compassionate love can also drive dopamine, and the fifth 00:18:46.45\00:18:50.59 one is novelty. And, of course, the sex and the novelty and the 00:18:50.59\00:18:56.40 food and the novelty tend to work together to produce these adverse brain changes in being 00:18:56.40\00:19:03.27 too satiated too frequently. >> No, we're gonna come back to these four stages of marriage, 00:19:03.27\00:19:06.88 but on this natural dopamine, so, it's not unhealthy to have 00:19:06.88\00:19:12.51 -- Because you need dopamine to function, which can be found through food, through sex, 00:19:12.51\00:19:19.12 through loving relationships, through friendships, and through this novelty, but it 00:19:19.12\00:19:23.79 must be done in a healthful respect... >> Correct. 00:19:23.79\00:19:27.13 >> ...and in healthful quantities, for lack of a better 00:19:27.13\00:19:31.07 word. >> And that's true -- both groups, the ones that are doing it healthfully and the ones that 00:19:31.07\00:19:35.80 are doing it unhealthfully, they're both getting their 00:19:35.80\00:19:39.34 dopamine. The difference is, the healthful people that are getting their dopamine, their 00:19:39.34\00:19:45.71 dopamine levels last for much longer. So they're actually getting more dopamine over the 00:19:45.71\00:19:50.69 course of time that's in a healthy way. And these are people that can experience a 00:19:50.69\00:19:56.73 wonderful dopamine surge from watching a sunset, you know? Or if are going on a walk or 00:19:56.73\00:20:02.13 cooking a meal or, you know, a dinner with a friend, you know? It can just be a very fulfilling 00:20:02.13\00:20:08.74 experience as the simple pleasures in life. But the ones 00:20:08.74\00:20:13.27 who are doing the dopamine spikes through the supernormal stimuli or doing it too 00:20:13.27\00:20:18.05 frequently, they're no longer going to enjoy those types of things. They might watch someone 00:20:18.05\00:20:21.75 watching a beautiful sunset, and they'll say, "You know, I used to kind of enjoy things like 00:20:21.75\00:20:26.55 that, but that's doing nothing for me right now." And it's really a sad state of 00:20:26.55\00:20:31.53 existence. And so they're actually going into false ways 00:20:31.53\00:20:35.56 of trying to alter the way they feel, which actually compounds the problem. >> So, let's go 00:20:35.56\00:20:42.44 back to these four stages of marriage and how it relates to the mental health and sex. 00:20:42.44\00:20:48.41 >> So, the first stage of marriage is that stage of 00:20:48.41\00:20:51.45 euphoria. Phenylethylamine is coming out, as well. And this actually helps you to 00:20:51.45\00:20:55.15 be less aware of the faults of the other person. >> Okay. 00:20:55.15\00:20:58.49 >> When the person is in love, they'll often say, "Are you 00:20:58.49\00:21:02.12 blind?" And they actually are blind, because phenylethylamine is pouring out in large 00:21:02.12\00:21:06.59 quantities, and they think their mate can do no wrong. And this is when you see them in 00:21:06.59\00:21:10.93 a pickup truck, and you're going down the highway, and you think there's one person in there, and 00:21:10.93\00:21:15.64 then you get close, and you realize, no, there's two people 00:21:15.64\00:21:19.14 in there. They're just right next to each other. They can't 00:21:19.14\00:21:22.41 get enough of each other. But after about 3 1/2 years of marriage, where you have been 00:21:22.41\00:21:27.62 overdoing it, in regards to the satiety and those type of things, you then go into the 00:21:27.62\00:21:32.62 non-euphoria stage. And when the non-euphoria stage is met, you'll see those people 00:21:32.62\00:21:37.99 on a bench seat in a pickup truck, one's on one side, and one's not even close to the 00:21:37.99\00:21:42.63 other one. They're pretty separate. And it turns out, in 00:21:42.63\00:21:46.80 the non-euphoria stages and the stages after that, often these people will not engage in 00:21:46.80\00:21:52.17 conscious affection unless they're in the pursuit of 00:21:52.17\00:21:56.64 orgasm. And that's a really sad state of existence. And a lot of 00:21:56.64\00:22:01.88 mature married people think that everybody's gonna go through those stages. They see the stage 00:22:01.88\00:22:06.55 of euphoria, and they're thinking, "Eh, just wait," you know? "It's gonna go away." 00:22:06.55\00:22:11.33 It was never really meant to go away. We were meant to actually 00:22:11.33\00:22:16.13 stay in that euphoric stage, and we weren't meant to be sexually satiated all the time. 00:22:16.13\00:22:21.50 Sexual satiation drives mates apart over time. And so it's 00:22:21.50\00:22:27.48 actually good to actually feel a little bit deprived and to wait until it's time, and then, the 00:22:27.48\00:22:32.88 female desire is just as much as the male, and in between times, they can't get enough of each 00:22:32.88\00:22:38.79 other. They're hugging each other, they're caressing each other, they're into each other 00:22:38.79\00:22:43.32 not for the pursuit of sex but just because of love and affection and companionship. 00:22:43.32\00:22:48.90 >> And then, what are the third and fourth stages? >> Well, the 00:22:48.90\00:22:53.60 third stage, as this progresses, is the despicable stage. This is 00:22:53.60\00:22:58.37 where you can look across your room at your mate and say, "You know, there's some things that I 00:22:58.37\00:23:02.34 just hate about him." And it is disappointing, but yet that's when people think, "Well, 00:23:02.34\00:23:10.05 love's no longer there. You know, might as well get a 00:23:10.05\00:23:14.09 divorce. And some people are wise enough to go through marriage counseling and those 00:23:14.09\00:23:18.29 sorts of things, and then they come out of it with stage four, which is the "mature" stage, and 00:23:18.29\00:23:24.80 that's the stage of toleration, where they decide, you know, "It's better that we stay 00:23:24.80\00:23:30.94 together. "Things aren't gonna be better if I choose another 00:23:30.94\00:23:33.84 mate, necessarily. This whole process is gonna start again. But, you know, we'll just 00:23:33.84\00:23:38.65 tolerate each other and go through our 50 years of marriage 00:23:38.65\00:23:43.62 this way." That's not what marriage was meant to be. We were meant to stay in that 00:23:43.62\00:23:47.39 euphoric stage, and once people understand this whole issue of sex and mental health -- it's 00:23:47.39\00:23:52.93 actually good to understand it earlier than later, but if you understand it later, you can go 00:23:52.93\00:23:57.07 through the 90-day sex fast that we talked about last program and then decrease the frequency to 00:23:57.07\00:24:04.14 once a week, then that stage of euphoria can come right back again, and all of the nice 00:24:04.14\00:24:09.11 sensitivities will come back in both partners. >> And so you've 00:24:09.11\00:24:13.08 brought us right back around, because we began by asking, "Is 00:24:13.08\00:24:16.58 there a solution?" There is a solution. It's a very simple solution. We talked about it in 00:24:16.58\00:24:21.06 the last program -- a 90-day fast from sex. During that 00:24:21.06\00:24:27.20 90-day fast, there are some physical and mental changes that begin to happen to the 00:24:27.20\00:24:32.00 individual going through that. What are those changes, and what 00:24:32.00\00:24:35.14 happens? >> Physically, the skin gets clearer, the posture actually gets better, 00:24:35.14\00:24:40.71 muscle-strengthening goes up. This is why the males who are in competition that have to do with 00:24:40.71\00:24:46.98 strength, like fighting and those type of things, they realize the person most likely 00:24:46.98\00:24:52.25 to win is the one who has gone the longest before having sex. So even if they're married, 00:24:52.25\00:24:58.03 they'll stay away from their partner for a long period of time to get those testosterone 00:24:58.03\00:25:02.06 levels up and get those testosterone receptors up. The voice becomes more manly. 00:25:02.06\00:25:07.84 When men overdo it, they actually become more feminine. And their voice will become a 00:25:07.84\00:25:14.34 higher pitch, they'll actually develop estrogen receptors from overdoing it, their testosterone 00:25:14.34\00:25:22.02 receptors will go down, and they actually lose some of the focus and concentration and creativity 00:25:22.02\00:25:29.39 that would've been there had they kept their masculine side 00:25:29.39\00:25:34.73 of things. >> Mm. And how about mentally? What's happening, 00:25:34.73\00:25:37.47 mentally, changes that go on during this sex fast, to begin repair? >> Yeah, emotionally, 00:25:37.47\00:25:44.14 they become far more stable. They are actually interested in 00:25:44.14\00:25:51.15 people socially. And men will talk about how they're not just looking at women and wondering 00:25:51.15\00:25:56.38 what they look like naked or in bed anymore, either. They want a 00:25:56.38\00:26:00.76 connection with people. It's not just about the sex anymore. 00:26:00.76\00:26:04.43 And they will talk about how their motivation for bigger-picture things goes up. 00:26:04.43\00:26:10.93 And so, they won't be on video games all day long anymore, they'll notice how silly and 00:26:10.93\00:26:16.07 foolish that is, and they will actually be able to start overachieving even in a work 00:26:16.07\00:26:21.11 environment. Engineering problems will become easier, math problems become 00:26:21.11\00:26:25.28 easier. And so, it's pretty dramatic. And then, in women, 00:26:25.28\00:26:31.35 they'll talk about how their clitoral sensitivity gets far better and they're able to much 00:26:31.35\00:26:38.86 more easily climax, and they're able to also notice that they're attracting -- both men and women 00:26:38.86\00:26:46.07 will talk about how they attract people of the opposite gender much easier after they've gone 00:26:46.07\00:26:51.01 through that. There's much more of a social connection and 00:26:51.01\00:26:55.64 engagement that others even notice about them once they've gone through this sex fast. 00:26:55.64\00:27:00.78 And women will talk about their depression going away, much easier for them to lose weight, 00:27:00.78\00:27:06.82 the obesity problem isn't there anymore. But it's tough, for 00:27:06.82\00:27:11.96 women and men, to do this, but it's well worth the effort. >> And it's hard to believe, 00:27:11.96\00:27:17.37 Dr. Nedley, that we are out of time. >> Oh, wow. 00:27:17.37\00:27:20.57 >> But we have seen that there is a great deal of hope that God desires us to be in a healthy 00:27:20.57\00:27:27.44 relationship, in regards to sex, and that healthy relationship will lead us to better mental 00:27:27.44\00:27:33.62 health and to experience the abundant life that Jesus offers. Dr. Nedley, would you pray for 00:27:33.62\00:27:38.59 us as we conclude today? >> Yes, Father in Heaven, we thank you 00:27:38.59\00:27:44.29 that you are the inventor of the family, you are the inventor of relationships, and you are the 00:27:44.29\00:27:50.53 inventor of sex. But we thank you that, through science and inspiration, you have showed us 00:27:50.53\00:27:57.11 how we can have life more abundantly and how even our sex lives can be far more abundant 00:27:57.11\00:28:03.71 by following your plan for our life. We pray that each viewer today will not only learn this 00:28:03.71\00:28:09.88 information but apply it in their own lives so they can experience a life more abundant 00:28:09.88\00:28:15.92 in you. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. 00:28:15.92\00:28:19.13 >> Amen. Dear friend, God desires that we would be in good 00:28:19.13\00:28:25.03 health. He wants us to have an abundant life and to live life 00:28:25.03\00:28:29.67 to its fullest. And in order to do that, we have to have a healthy relationship towards 00:28:29.67\00:28:35.04 sex, and that healthy relationship towards sex will, in turn, help us to have a 00:28:35.04\00:28:41.32 healthy brain, a healthy mental outlook. These two programs that we've done with Dr. Nedley have 00:28:41.32\00:28:47.02 been interesting but, more than interesting, have provided a pathway where we can find hope 00:28:47.02\00:28:53.43 in Jesus to having a healthy mental and sexual relationship. I want to offer you the DVD of 00:28:53.43\00:29:01.57 those two programs. Here's the information you need 00:29:01.57\00:29:04.91 to receive today's offer. >> To request today's offer, 00:29:04.91\00:29:08.21 just log on to www.ItIsWrittenCanada.ca. 00:29:08.21\00:29:12.51 If you prefer, you may call, toll-free, at 1-888-CALL-IIW. 00:29:12.51\00:29:17.75 >> Friend, if you are interested in more resources from 00:29:17.75\00:29:20.92 Dr. Nedley, you can check out a number of different websites. 00:29:20.92\00:29:25.16 You can go to weimar.edu. You can go to NewStart.org. 00:29:25.16\00:29:30.33 You can go to optimizeyourbrain.com or 00:29:30.33\00:29:33.74 depressionthewayout.com. There, you can find plentiful 00:29:33.74\00:29:38.81 resources on mental health. And if you would like additional 00:29:38.81\00:29:43.11 information on how you can grow spiritually and experience a 00:29:43.11\00:29:46.28 life with Jesus to its fullest, you can to ItIsWrittenCanada.ca. 00:29:46.28\00:29:52.25 Thank you for watching. I encourage you to join us again 00:29:52.25\00:29:55.09 next week. Until then, remember, "It is 00:29:55.09\00:29:57.99 written: 'Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word 00:29:57.99\00:30:02.73 that proceeds from the mouth of God.'" 00:30:02.73\00:30:06.63 ¤¤ 00:30:06.63\00:30:09.50