Welcome to Issues and Answers.
00:00:27.49\00:00:29.09
Today, our topic is the
"The Widow's Son of Niles."
00:00:29.12\00:00:34.23
Did you know that according
00:00:34.26\00:00:35.80
to the
population reference bureau
00:00:35.83\00:00:37.77
in the United States,
00:00:37.80\00:00:39.13
the number of children
in single mother families
00:00:39.17\00:00:41.50
has risen drastically
over the past four decades
00:00:41.54\00:00:45.01
causing considerable concern
00:00:45.04\00:00:46.91
among policy
makers and the public.
00:00:46.94\00:00:49.28
The effects of growing up
in single parent households
00:00:49.31\00:00:52.18
has been shown to
go beyond economics,
00:00:52.21\00:00:55.02
increasing the risk of
children dropping out of school,
00:00:55.05\00:00:57.95
disconnecting
from the labor force
00:00:57.99\00:01:00.29
and becoming teen
parents themselves.
00:01:00.32\00:01:02.92
Although many children
00:01:02.96\00:01:04.29
growing up in single
parent family succeed,
00:01:04.33\00:01:06.76
others will face
significant challenges
00:01:06.80\00:01:09.30
in making the
transition to adulthood.
00:01:09.33\00:01:11.93
Children in lower
income single parent families
00:01:11.97\00:01:14.50
face the most
significant barriers
00:01:14.54\00:01:17.44
to success in
school and the workforce.
00:01:17.47\00:01:21.14
Today, to talk about
this issue is Mr. Gregg Baker,
00:01:21.18\00:01:25.75
he is a graduate
of Andrews Academy,
00:01:25.78\00:01:28.88
as well as Indiana University
with a degree in accounting
00:01:28.92\00:01:32.32
and he himself will
share this incredible story
00:01:32.35\00:01:35.82
of "The Widow's Son of Niles".
00:01:35.86\00:01:38.69
Welcome to the program,
Gregg. Thank you, Karen.
00:01:38.73\00:01:41.13
Thank you so much.
Thank you for having me.
00:01:41.16\00:01:43.13
It's a real
pleasure to have you here.
00:01:43.16\00:01:44.73
It's a pleasure being here.
00:01:44.77\00:01:46.10
Especially as my
academy classmate...
00:01:46.13\00:01:49.47
That's right.
From Andrews Academy.
00:01:49.50\00:01:51.37
That's right.
00:01:51.41\00:01:52.81
So where would you
like to begin the story?
00:01:52.84\00:01:55.64
I guess, I'll begin as
a young child in Niles.
00:01:55.68\00:02:00.22
Okay.
00:02:00.25\00:02:01.62
My mother was a widow
00:02:01.65\00:02:07.46
'cause I lost my father
when I was 11 years old and...
00:02:07.49\00:02:12.19
Sorry to hear that.
00:02:12.23\00:02:13.56
Thank you, yeah,
I'd spent a lot of years
00:02:13.60\00:02:15.73
as a child without a father
but we made it, we made it.
00:02:15.76\00:02:20.57
What was your father like?
00:02:20.60\00:02:21.94
You remember your dad?
00:02:21.97\00:02:23.30
Yeah, my dad was a hard
worker, a very hard worker
00:02:23.34\00:02:26.57
and I guess that's
kind of where I got my drive
00:02:26.61\00:02:30.25
for working it from...
00:02:30.28\00:02:32.98
Right.
00:02:33.01\00:02:34.35
But my dad, all as I knew him,
always held down two jobs...
00:02:34.38\00:02:38.12
Really?
00:02:38.15\00:02:39.49
He worked at a factory downtown
and he worked as a yard man
00:02:39.52\00:02:43.79
and that kind of
work for a doctor
00:02:43.83\00:02:47.66
down in Niles as well.
00:02:47.70\00:02:49.43
Well, and in addition to
that, you guys had a farm.
00:02:49.46\00:02:53.54
We had a farm. How many acres?
00:02:53.57\00:02:55.50
Oh, boy, well, the
biggest part of the farm
00:02:55.54\00:03:00.18
actually was about seven acres,
00:03:00.21\00:03:04.15
which is where
our horses were kept
00:03:04.18\00:03:06.21
and that's where I live today.
00:03:06.25\00:03:08.88
Wow. Yes.
00:03:08.92\00:03:10.25
Okay. That's where I live today.
00:03:10.29\00:03:11.62
Well, so your dad...
00:03:11.65\00:03:13.46
He passed away when
you were 11 years old.
00:03:13.49\00:03:15.92
When I was 11 years.
00:03:15.96\00:03:17.29
And did you have
brothers or sisters?
00:03:17.33\00:03:18.66
I did, I had
brothers and sisters,
00:03:18.69\00:03:21.03
and I was the
youngest of all five children.
00:03:21.06\00:03:25.93
There was three boys
and two girls and we...
00:03:25.97\00:03:31.51
My older brother,
00:03:31.54\00:03:32.87
next older brother
was 14 when dad died
00:03:32.91\00:03:36.71
and we had to take care of
all of the responsibilities
00:03:36.75\00:03:40.28
of the house.
00:03:40.32\00:03:41.65
So did your mother
work outside the home
00:03:41.68\00:03:43.18
at that time?
00:03:43.22\00:03:44.55
She did, she was
a school teacher.
00:03:44.59\00:03:45.92
Oh, okay.
00:03:45.95\00:03:47.29
So she had
other responsibilities
00:03:47.32\00:03:51.19
outside the house.
00:03:51.23\00:03:52.56
Okay.
00:03:52.59\00:03:53.93
So the household
immediately lost an income?
00:03:53.96\00:03:57.40
Yes, it did. Yes, it did.
00:03:57.43\00:03:58.83
And how did that feel?
00:03:58.87\00:04:00.94
Well, you know, at
being 11 years old,
00:04:00.97\00:04:02.50
I don't know a whole
lot about what goes on
00:04:02.54\00:04:04.54
with finance in the house
but I know that it was tough,
00:04:04.57\00:04:08.58
it was very hard.
00:04:08.61\00:04:10.45
What was it like?
00:04:10.48\00:04:13.15
Well, we didn't have
00:04:13.18\00:04:16.25
what the things
that we actually wanted
00:04:16.28\00:04:20.12
and sometimes,
00:04:20.16\00:04:21.49
didn't have the
things that we needed.
00:04:21.52\00:04:23.19
But we were able
to make ends meet.
00:04:23.22\00:04:27.50
Did you always have the clothes
00:04:27.53\00:04:28.96
that you needed for
school at that time,
00:04:29.00\00:04:31.53
immediately after
your dad passed away?
00:04:31.57\00:04:34.77
Did you have...
00:04:34.80\00:04:37.37
Yeah, well, it's interesting
because when the economics
00:04:37.41\00:04:42.34
after that time fell,
00:04:42.38\00:04:44.88
it did effect
me personally with,
00:04:44.91\00:04:48.05
having the
clothes that I needed,
00:04:48.08\00:04:49.92
the food that was in
the house, child care.
00:04:49.95\00:04:54.66
It was a big issue in
our home and I often times
00:04:54.69\00:04:59.43
fell to the
responsibilities of my sister
00:04:59.46\00:05:02.36
who was there to take care of me
00:05:02.40\00:05:05.03
and get me going in the morning
00:05:05.07\00:05:08.20
because mom had to work
and mother had school to teach.
00:05:08.24\00:05:12.87
Right, so your
sisters were the ones
00:05:12.91\00:05:14.88
that got you ready for school...
00:05:14.91\00:05:17.11
That's correct. And
sent you off to school.
00:05:17.15\00:05:18.48
There you go, that's what.
00:05:18.51\00:05:19.85
And you were the
baby in the family?
00:05:19.88\00:05:21.22
I'm the youngest, yes.
00:05:21.25\00:05:22.72
So as time,
00:05:22.75\00:05:24.09
What's the age
difference between,
00:05:24.12\00:05:25.75
you know, the number of years
00:05:25.79\00:05:27.12
between your
sisters and yourself?
00:05:27.16\00:05:29.82
Oh, boy.
00:05:29.86\00:05:31.19
Were they like
much older than you?
00:05:31.23\00:05:32.56
Yeah, they were actually,
00:05:32.59\00:05:34.03
they took the place
of my mother in care.
00:05:34.06\00:05:40.04
So I don't really remember
00:05:40.07\00:05:45.37
how many years, you know, it was
00:05:45.41\00:05:47.44
but I know that the
responsibilities for me
00:05:47.48\00:05:53.01
getting up in the
morning, getting my bath,
00:05:53.05\00:05:55.85
getting out of the house
00:05:55.88\00:05:58.22
and going down to catch the
bus was sisters responsibility
00:05:58.25\00:06:04.09
because mother
was teaching school.
00:06:04.13\00:06:06.70
So eventually, your
sisters, they got married
00:06:06.73\00:06:09.66
'cause they were
older than you, right?
00:06:09.70\00:06:11.03
Yes, they did, yeah.
00:06:11.07\00:06:12.40
And they moved
outside of the house?
00:06:12.43\00:06:13.77
Yes, they moved
downtown into another town
00:06:13.80\00:06:17.77
and as a married person,
00:06:17.81\00:06:19.57
they started
their families there.
00:06:19.61\00:06:21.54
So how did that leave you
then with your sisters gone,
00:06:21.58\00:06:25.81
how old were
you about that time?
00:06:25.85\00:06:28.45
I was, see like I said,
my father died when I was 11.
00:06:28.48\00:06:34.09
So that very well
00:06:34.12\00:06:37.03
could have been another
seven, eight years later on.
00:06:37.06\00:06:39.86
So I could have been
17, of having basically
00:06:39.89\00:06:45.03
no guidance, no care, no,
00:06:45.07\00:06:50.47
nothing to do for my family,
00:06:50.51\00:06:56.78
which was then, my mother and I.
00:06:56.81\00:07:00.65
You were on your
own? I was on my own.
00:07:00.68\00:07:02.28
I was completely on my own.
00:07:02.32\00:07:04.65
Kind of, raising yourself
at that point 'cause mom was...
00:07:04.69\00:07:06.55
Yes, right, at 17, 18...
00:07:06.59\00:07:08.02
At 17. Yeah.
00:07:08.06\00:07:09.92
So I'm just gonna kind of
reflect on some of the things
00:07:09.96\00:07:12.39
that I remember about you
and that was, you had a car,
00:07:12.43\00:07:16.80
nobody had a car.
00:07:16.83\00:07:18.93
Yeah, I did.
How did that happen?
00:07:18.97\00:07:20.30
I had a gold Gremlin. Right.
00:07:20.34\00:07:24.11
You remember those cars? Right.
00:07:24.14\00:07:25.51
Yeah.
00:07:25.54\00:07:26.88
I'm taking myself, so
let's not say that too much.
00:07:26.91\00:07:28.98
Okay, all right, all right.
00:07:29.01\00:07:30.91
No, yeah, I did, I had a car
00:07:30.95\00:07:33.15
because living
out in the country,
00:07:33.18\00:07:35.62
you know, with the farm
there, if you didn't have a car,
00:07:35.65\00:07:39.19
you didn't go anywhere at all.
00:07:39.22\00:07:40.62
So you had to have a car
00:07:40.66\00:07:42.79
and that's how
you had to get around,
00:07:42.82\00:07:44.99
it was your own work,
00:07:45.03\00:07:50.73
your own transportation.
00:07:50.77\00:07:52.80
Right, so now you
were now out of Niles...
00:07:52.83\00:07:54.90
Right.
00:07:54.94\00:07:56.27
And you were going to
Andrews Academy which is,
00:07:56.30\00:07:58.94
what about 30 minutes away?
00:07:58.97\00:08:00.31
About, yeah. About
25-30 minutes away.
00:08:00.34\00:08:02.61
And during the snow it's...
00:08:02.64\00:08:03.98
It's cold and
it's very dangerous...
00:08:04.01\00:08:06.51
Right.
00:08:06.55\00:08:07.88
And it's very
hard to get around.
00:08:07.92\00:08:09.38
So how did your
family get the car?
00:08:09.42\00:08:11.82
How did you get the car,
did you work to get the car?
00:08:11.85\00:08:14.06
I did, I worked. What
kind of work did you do?
00:08:14.09\00:08:16.36
I worked summers with
a neighbor who had a farm
00:08:16.39\00:08:21.36
and I baled hay
all summer long and...
00:08:21.40\00:08:24.97
So you paid for your own car?
00:08:25.00\00:08:26.33
I pretty much
paid for my own car.
00:08:26.37\00:08:28.47
Yes, yes. Wow.
00:08:28.50\00:08:30.07
So you worked...
00:08:30.11\00:08:31.47
And hay baling
is very hard work.
00:08:31.51\00:08:32.84
Really?
00:08:32.87\00:08:34.21
What does that involve,
for those who are not familiar
00:08:34.24\00:08:35.58
with the farm life?
00:08:35.61\00:08:36.95
Oh, what is in about,
00:08:36.98\00:08:38.31
you have to get
the hay off the wagon,
00:08:38.35\00:08:42.52
off the baler
00:08:42.55\00:08:43.89
and you had to
put it on the wagon
00:08:43.92\00:08:45.25
and stack that up
00:08:45.29\00:08:46.62
and then you
have to take the wagon
00:08:46.65\00:08:47.99
and take it to the barn
00:08:48.02\00:08:49.36
and put this with
the hay in the barn.
00:08:49.39\00:08:51.69
So there was an helper
that was working there too,
00:08:51.73\00:08:55.53
who drove the tractor, I
pulled the hay off the baler
00:08:55.56\00:09:00.67
and stacked it up and
he drove the tractors.
00:09:00.70\00:09:03.20
So he had the easier job.
00:09:03.24\00:09:05.04
Now I understand at
Niles, Michigan, there are,
00:09:05.07\00:09:08.04
it's kind of, like the end
of the underground railroad
00:09:08.08\00:09:10.88
in some ways and
there are lot of black,
00:09:10.91\00:09:12.91
African-American
farmers that have land...
00:09:12.95\00:09:15.52
Yes. Over the years.
00:09:15.55\00:09:16.89
Yes.
00:09:16.92\00:09:18.25
How did your dad
come to get that land,
00:09:18.29\00:09:20.06
the seven acres?
00:09:20.09\00:09:21.42
He worked for
it. He worked for it?
00:09:21.46\00:09:22.79
He worked for it and
he was working, as I said,
00:09:22.82\00:09:25.13
he worked in the
factory downtown,
00:09:25.16\00:09:27.43
so he and my mom
saved their money
00:09:27.46\00:09:30.57
and they bought the land
00:09:30.60\00:09:31.93
and he built the
250 foot barn there
00:09:31.97\00:09:37.14
and raised horses there and...
00:09:37.17\00:09:39.44
Wow. That was a lot of work.
00:09:39.47\00:09:42.61
So when your dad passed
away, did you keep all of that?
00:09:42.64\00:09:46.01
Did you keep the
farm, did you keep the land,
00:09:46.05\00:09:48.15
did you keep the horses?
00:09:48.18\00:09:49.52
Yeah, we did.
00:09:49.55\00:09:50.89
We kept all of those things
00:09:50.92\00:09:52.32
because that was the,
00:09:52.35\00:09:55.22
those were the
things that I had to do was,
00:09:55.26\00:09:58.13
to take care of the farm
00:09:58.16\00:10:00.70
and take care of the horses
and get them down the road
00:10:00.73\00:10:06.23
because see, we also had
to sell the horses later on
00:10:06.27\00:10:10.17
because we were
the only ones there...
00:10:10.21\00:10:12.17
Right.
00:10:12.21\00:10:13.54
So we actually
had to sell the horses
00:10:13.58\00:10:16.14
but that was later on,
00:10:16.18\00:10:18.15
that was
actually when my sisters,
00:10:18.18\00:10:20.72
after they got out
and they got married.
00:10:20.75\00:10:23.99
So that could have been,
00:10:24.02\00:10:25.35
you know, six or
seven years later on.
00:10:25.39\00:10:26.72
So you grew up with the horses
00:10:26.76\00:10:28.82
and what kinds of things
did you raise in the farm?
00:10:28.86\00:10:32.83
Did you grow anything or...
00:10:32.86\00:10:34.20
Yeah, we had a
very big farm. You did?
00:10:34.23\00:10:36.70
Yeah, as we call--
What kind of crops such as?
00:10:36.73\00:10:39.63
What kind of crops, right?
00:10:39.67\00:10:41.07
A truck farm as you can
call. What's a truck farm?
00:10:41.10\00:10:43.61
A truck farm is when
you get all of the things
00:10:43.64\00:10:47.71
out of the garden
that you have harvested
00:10:47.74\00:10:50.85
and you get them on the truck
00:10:50.88\00:10:52.78
and you take them
down to the corner
00:10:52.81\00:10:54.85
and then you sell them there.
00:10:54.88\00:10:56.69
So who was doing all
that work? That was me.
00:10:56.72\00:10:58.82
You? That was me.
00:10:58.85\00:11:00.19
What about your brothers,
00:11:00.22\00:11:01.56
were they around
or had they left?
00:11:01.59\00:11:02.92
No, my brothers
weren't around then,
00:11:02.96\00:11:04.99
it was pretty much me
00:11:05.03\00:11:06.70
and whoever else I
could get to help me.
00:11:06.73\00:11:12.40
And how did you
manage doing all of that
00:11:12.43\00:11:14.54
and go to school?
00:11:14.57\00:11:15.90
Did you have to
drop out at some point?
00:11:15.94\00:11:17.57
No, I never had to drop
out but it was a long day,
00:11:17.61\00:11:22.64
it was a long day at work.
00:11:22.68\00:11:24.01
What time did your day start?
00:11:24.05\00:11:25.38
Oh, somewhere early
about 6 o'clock in the morning
00:11:25.41\00:11:29.08
and then I'd have to
do all the chores of today
00:11:29.12\00:11:31.95
and of the farm and the
garden and then go to school
00:11:31.99\00:11:37.49
and then after
school, I come back
00:11:37.53\00:11:38.93
and I would work it some more,
00:11:38.96\00:11:40.40
another two, three
hours till dark and...
00:11:40.43\00:11:45.57
How did you study for school?
00:11:45.60\00:11:47.20
Yeah, well, that I had
to fit there in somewhere
00:11:47.24\00:11:49.30
and I probably should
have done a whole lot better
00:11:49.34\00:11:51.51
than I did but...
00:11:51.54\00:11:52.87
Seriously, Gregg, okay,
00:11:52.91\00:11:54.24
you had to get up in the morning
00:11:54.28\00:11:55.74
and run up farm by
yourself as a teenager...
00:11:55.78\00:11:58.45
Yeah. I think
you did pretty well.
00:11:58.48\00:12:00.58
Well, it was because of the,
00:12:00.62\00:12:03.79
there was God's
grace that got me through.
00:12:03.82\00:12:05.92
Amen. Amen.
00:12:05.95\00:12:07.46
Yeah. So...
00:12:07.49\00:12:08.82
And those of us,
we didn't know that.
00:12:08.86\00:12:11.36
We didn't know, we
just saw you coming,
00:12:11.39\00:12:12.73
you know, with
your car to school...
00:12:12.76\00:12:14.76
Yeah.
00:12:14.80\00:12:16.13
We're like, Gregg is hot stuff
00:12:16.16\00:12:17.50
and you played a
meme game of basketball.
00:12:17.53\00:12:20.14
Yeah, I did, I did try to...
00:12:20.17\00:12:21.50
How did you manage to
perfect your basketball game,
00:12:21.54\00:12:22.87
in the meanwhile,
00:12:22.90\00:12:24.24
running the whole
farm as a teenager?
00:12:24.27\00:12:25.61
Well, practice,
practice, practice--
00:12:25.64\00:12:26.98
Your mom didn't do
anything with the farm?
00:12:27.01\00:12:28.34
No, she didn't.
00:12:28.38\00:12:29.71
She was not
really, so it was your dad
00:12:29.74\00:12:31.08
who was the outdoor guy?
00:12:31.11\00:12:32.45
Yes.
00:12:32.48\00:12:33.82
And your mom was
the school teacher?
00:12:33.85\00:12:35.18
The school teacher, yeah.
00:12:35.22\00:12:36.55
So it really all fell on you...
00:12:36.58\00:12:38.19
Yeah, yeah, it all fell
on me and my brother for,
00:12:38.22\00:12:42.36
you know, as
much as he could help
00:12:42.39\00:12:44.09
and other people who
would be a part of our lives,
00:12:44.13\00:12:46.63
that would help as well...
00:12:46.66\00:12:48.00
From time to time.
From time to time, yeah.
00:12:48.03\00:12:49.36
So you had a plan,
did you have the plan?
00:12:49.40\00:12:52.57
Plan what crops you
are gonna sow and all that?
00:12:52.60\00:12:54.77
Oh, yeah, we've decided...
How did you do that, Gregg?
00:12:54.80\00:12:57.71
We decided early
within the season
00:12:57.74\00:12:59.54
what to plant and...
00:12:59.57\00:13:01.81
Did you work with the farm agent
00:13:01.84\00:13:03.48
or anything like that or?
00:13:03.51\00:13:05.45
No, it was pretty
much whatever we knew,
00:13:05.48\00:13:08.45
whatever we knew
is what we depended on
00:13:08.48\00:13:11.65
to get the farm going.
00:13:11.69\00:13:13.42
What'd you raise?
00:13:13.46\00:13:14.96
Oh, boy, we've raised
corn and I mentioned corn first
00:13:14.99\00:13:18.96
because I really love corn so...
00:13:18.99\00:13:21.26
Really? Oh, yeah.
00:13:21.30\00:13:22.63
So-- That Michigan sweet corn.
00:13:22.66\00:13:24.03
Oh, yes. Yeah.
00:13:24.07\00:13:25.47
Yes, it is, corn
is good and we had...
00:13:25.50\00:13:28.07
How did you plant it?
00:13:28.10\00:13:29.44
Did you have machines
or were you out there,
00:13:29.47\00:13:30.81
just individually
planting the corn?
00:13:30.84\00:13:32.21
One seed at a time.
00:13:32.24\00:13:34.18
You know, the Bible
speaks of a story about a woman,
00:13:34.21\00:13:40.15
her son and Jesus, in Luke 7.
00:13:40.18\00:13:43.59
Luke 7, okay.
00:13:43.62\00:13:45.75
What verse? Verse 11.
00:13:45.79\00:13:47.52
Okay.
00:13:47.56\00:13:49.52
"He so I guess was
talking about Jesus,
00:13:49.56\00:13:51.16
"went into a city called Nain,
00:13:51.19\00:13:53.40
and many of His
disciples went with Him.
00:13:53.43\00:13:55.90
And when He came
near the gate of the city,
00:13:55.93\00:13:58.10
behold, a dead man
was being carried out,
00:13:58.13\00:14:00.64
the only son of a
mother and she was a widow.
00:14:00.67\00:14:04.94
And a large crowd
from the city was with her.
00:14:04.97\00:14:07.68
When the Lord saw her,
He had compassion on her
00:14:07.71\00:14:10.55
and said, "Do not weep."
00:14:10.58\00:14:13.18
Then He came and
touched the open coffin,
00:14:13.21\00:14:15.72
and those who
carried with him stood still.
00:14:15.75\00:14:18.25
And He said, 'Young
man, I say to you, arise.'"
00:14:18.29\00:14:22.09
Wow.
00:14:22.12\00:14:23.59
"So he who was dead
sat up and began to speak.
00:14:23.63\00:14:27.86
And He presented
him to his mother."
00:14:27.90\00:14:31.47
Jesus presented
him to his mother.
00:14:31.50\00:14:33.10
Yes.
00:14:33.13\00:14:34.77
And so what I'm saying,
00:14:34.80\00:14:36.40
what I'm trying to
help you understand
00:14:36.44\00:14:39.04
is that story reminds me of me.
00:14:39.07\00:14:42.54
I wasn't dead
00:14:42.58\00:14:45.11
but I was still a
player in this story.
00:14:45.15\00:14:47.98
Right.
00:14:48.02\00:14:50.65
How does that
remind you of your life,
00:14:50.69\00:14:53.32
this particular story?
00:14:53.36\00:14:54.69
And how do you
think, what do you think
00:14:54.72\00:14:56.39
would be helpful
for other young men
00:14:56.42\00:14:58.89
who are being
raised by their mothers?
00:14:58.93\00:15:01.50
Well, yeah, the best
thing that I can tell you
00:15:01.53\00:15:05.10
is it reminds me
00:15:05.13\00:15:06.47
because this
story really was about
00:15:06.50\00:15:08.54
a mother and her son.
00:15:08.57\00:15:11.21
Like in my story with you
00:15:11.24\00:15:12.97
is really about my mother and me
00:15:13.01\00:15:16.34
and there are a lot of people
00:15:16.38\00:15:19.25
who have single
parent household.
00:15:19.28\00:15:22.58
There are a lot of
single parent households.
00:15:22.62\00:15:24.25
Right.
00:15:24.29\00:15:25.62
And there are a lot of people
00:15:25.65\00:15:26.99
that are being
raised by their mother
00:15:27.02\00:15:29.26
and often times,
these are young men
00:15:29.29\00:15:31.76
who are raised by
their mother just as I was.
00:15:31.79\00:15:35.83
So that's how the story,
kind of, reminds me of me.
00:15:35.86\00:15:40.70
So what I wanted to
help you understand is that
00:15:40.74\00:15:45.01
there are single
parents out there,
00:15:45.04\00:15:48.24
who are raising their young sons
00:15:48.28\00:15:51.98
and there are sons out there
00:15:52.01\00:15:53.38
who are being raised
by their single parents.
00:15:53.42\00:15:55.85
How was it for you,
once you hit your teen years,
00:15:55.88\00:15:59.29
what was it like
not having your dad
00:15:59.32\00:16:01.49
and your mom,
00:16:01.52\00:16:02.86
what kind of
relationship did you guys have?
00:16:02.89\00:16:05.73
Well, my mom...
00:16:05.76\00:16:07.33
Obviously, she had all
of the responsibilities
00:16:07.36\00:16:09.86
of a large family,
00:16:09.90\00:16:12.73
of which I was just
the one member of it
00:16:12.77\00:16:15.97
at this time
00:16:16.00\00:16:17.34
because the other
sisters and brothers
00:16:17.37\00:16:19.51
had kind of moved on...
00:16:19.54\00:16:20.88
Right.
00:16:20.91\00:16:22.24
So I was young and
that was the responsibility
00:16:22.28\00:16:25.95
that my mother accepted
and she took it very well.
00:16:25.98\00:16:31.59
But let me read you
the rest of the story.
00:16:31.62\00:16:33.46
Okay.
00:16:33.49\00:16:35.62
"Then fear came upon all,
and they glorified God, saying,
00:16:35.66\00:16:39.56
'A great prophet
has risen up among us'
00:16:39.59\00:16:41.86
and, 'God has
visited His people.'
00:16:41.90\00:16:45.03
What does that mean to you?
00:16:45.07\00:16:46.80
This last part of the story?
00:16:46.84\00:16:49.10
Well, that God is
in this story still,
00:16:49.14\00:16:52.71
even though it doesn't
reference Him earlier on,
00:16:52.74\00:16:56.95
it just is, only
just the two sentences.
00:16:56.98\00:16:59.78
Right.
00:16:59.81\00:17:01.15
The, "Young man, I say
to you" and "Do not weep."
00:17:01.18\00:17:05.89
But God is still in this story
00:17:05.92\00:17:08.39
just like God is
still in our lives...
00:17:08.42\00:17:11.06
Our young people's lives,
we are still in God's will
00:17:11.09\00:17:17.03
and that's what it spoke to me
that God is still in the story.
00:17:17.07\00:17:23.91
So a young person, a young man
00:17:23.94\00:17:26.24
that's been raised
by a single mother,
00:17:26.27\00:17:29.14
you're saying that
00:17:29.18\00:17:30.51
they're still
within the will of God.
00:17:30.55\00:17:32.11
They still are in
the will of God, yeah.
00:17:32.15\00:17:33.82
Someone may have told
them that they're in accident
00:17:33.85\00:17:36.82
but they're still within...
00:17:36.85\00:17:38.25
They're still
in the will of God.
00:17:38.29\00:17:39.62
The will of God.
00:17:39.65\00:17:40.99
It's really what
God depends for us
00:17:41.02\00:17:43.46
is what's important.
00:17:43.49\00:17:44.83
What do you mean by
that? What God depends for us?
00:17:44.86\00:17:48.33
Well, when we live
our lives, we don't,
00:17:48.36\00:17:53.40
we think that it's
only by chance but it's not.
00:17:53.44\00:17:58.21
It's what God wants for us,
00:17:58.24\00:18:00.98
is what God is
to be praised for.
00:18:01.01\00:18:05.01
Amen.
00:18:05.05\00:18:06.38
So you took your
responsibilities on,
00:18:06.41\00:18:08.85
in your life as God's will?
00:18:08.88\00:18:11.39
Yes.
00:18:11.42\00:18:13.39
Did you have any other
men in your life coming along
00:18:13.42\00:18:17.36
that helped you along the way?
00:18:17.39\00:18:19.16
Well, you know, I
still had my brothers
00:18:19.19\00:18:21.16
who were there still in my life
00:18:21.20\00:18:23.87
but they weren't really
a part of my every day life
00:18:23.90\00:18:27.64
because they
were, kind of, moved on.
00:18:27.67\00:18:30.71
So I also had my sisters,
you know, who had married.
00:18:30.74\00:18:35.04
Right, your brother-in-laws?
00:18:35.08\00:18:36.41
The brother-in-laws,
they were a part of my life.
00:18:36.44\00:18:37.78
Did they teach you anything?
00:18:37.81\00:18:39.15
Yes, they did,
they taught me a lot.
00:18:39.18\00:18:40.52
What did they teach you?
00:18:40.55\00:18:41.88
They taught me a lot of
things of responsibility.
00:18:41.92\00:18:45.59
Like what?
00:18:45.62\00:18:47.46
They'd teach you
how to work a budget,
00:18:47.49\00:18:49.19
of course, you kind
of knew that already...
00:18:49.22\00:18:50.63
Yeah, I was... In a farm.
00:18:50.66\00:18:51.99
Yeah, I was taught
that really in class.
00:18:52.03\00:18:55.46
Oh, so you learned
that from the school?
00:18:55.50\00:18:57.37
I learnt that from school, yeah.
00:18:57.40\00:18:59.20
But they taught
me responsibilities
00:18:59.23\00:19:02.84
of taking care of my mother
00:19:02.87\00:19:04.91
and taking care of
our home and our family.
00:19:04.94\00:19:07.58
Wow.
00:19:07.61\00:19:09.08
That's pretty
amazing, how about a church?
00:19:09.11\00:19:11.58
Were there manage church
00:19:11.61\00:19:12.95
that took you
like, over the weekends,
00:19:12.98\00:19:15.32
did you spend
weekends with other people,
00:19:15.35\00:19:16.99
other men, who mentored you?
00:19:17.02\00:19:18.45
No, those were a program
00:19:18.49\00:19:21.72
that really was
outside of our church
00:19:21.76\00:19:24.39
and happened in other kids lives
00:19:24.43\00:19:29.70
but not really in
mine, not mine, no.
00:19:29.73\00:19:31.70
So you really
didn't have all of that,
00:19:31.73\00:19:33.30
you didn't have a
whole a lot of nurturing?
00:19:33.34\00:19:35.27
No, I didn't. What
about teachers at school?
00:19:35.30\00:19:37.04
Yeah, there were teachers
00:19:37.07\00:19:38.91
that were in my
life a little bit
00:19:38.94\00:19:42.28
but not
necessarily everyday, you know.
00:19:42.31\00:19:45.75
So you learned
to play basketball?
00:19:45.78\00:19:47.82
Yes, I did.
00:19:47.85\00:19:49.18
Were you able to use basketball
to kind of help you cope
00:19:49.22\00:19:52.29
with some of these pressures
00:19:52.32\00:19:53.66
that you had in
responsibilities?
00:19:53.69\00:19:55.02
Yeah, sports played
00:19:55.06\00:19:56.42
a very important part of my life
00:19:56.46\00:19:58.29
'cause I, you know,
00:19:58.33\00:20:00.20
I'm not trying to
brag but I was pretty good.
00:20:00.23\00:20:02.16
Yeah.
00:20:02.20\00:20:03.53
And I learned a lot of lessons
from those sports because,
00:20:03.57\00:20:09.44
you know, a sport really
is a team of, in my case,
00:20:09.47\00:20:14.08
basketball team of
young men who got together
00:20:14.11\00:20:17.58
and all with one
common goal and as a family,
00:20:17.61\00:20:21.88
you have to have a common goal.
00:20:21.92\00:20:24.35
So sports did
help me there, yeah.
00:20:24.39\00:20:27.42
How much time did you
dedicate playing basketball?
00:20:27.46\00:20:30.93
Well, according to my
mother, it was too much time
00:20:30.96\00:20:35.53
because she would say to me,
00:20:35.56\00:20:37.47
"You bounce that ball too much."
00:20:37.50\00:20:40.17
But in my own
life I would think,
00:20:40.20\00:20:43.87
"Yeah, that I did probably
bounce the ball too much."
00:20:43.91\00:20:46.71
So I had to listen, I
only learned those lessons
00:20:46.74\00:20:50.38
later on in life that
what I should have done,
00:20:50.41\00:20:53.28
I didn't do, but
what I did do is,
00:20:53.31\00:20:58.32
kind of, lot of times
what I shouldn't have done.
00:20:58.35\00:21:00.19
So how did you go on
to, go to college, you know,
00:21:00.22\00:21:03.69
lot of young men,
according to the statistics
00:21:03.73\00:21:06.76
that we mentioned
earlier in the program,
00:21:06.80\00:21:09.40
they are at risk,
significantly at risk,
00:21:09.43\00:21:12.93
to drop out of high school...
00:21:12.97\00:21:14.80
Yeah.
00:21:14.84\00:21:16.17
You didn't drop
out of high school?
00:21:16.20\00:21:17.54
No, I didn't and I
credit a lot of the government
00:21:17.57\00:21:22.58
for creating
programs for me because...
00:21:22.61\00:21:25.78
Like what kind of programs?
00:21:25.81\00:21:27.15
When you're on a
single parent house,
00:21:27.18\00:21:31.49
you get assistance
from the government,
00:21:31.52\00:21:34.19
from up until a certain age
00:21:34.22\00:21:37.46
to be able to handle
those responsibilities of,
00:21:37.49\00:21:40.46
a father being gone
or a parent being gone.
00:21:40.50\00:21:43.03
Are you saying,
you mean the finances?
00:21:43.06\00:21:44.40
Yeah. You got financial help?
00:21:44.43\00:21:45.77
Yeah, right.
00:21:45.80\00:21:47.14
Or were there are
like after school programs
00:21:47.17\00:21:48.50
or any other programs
that you participated in?
00:21:48.54\00:21:50.94
No, those after school programs
were done either by me...
00:21:50.97\00:21:55.54
You were on your own
at after school program?
00:21:55.58\00:21:57.15
I was on my own at
after school program.
00:21:57.18\00:21:58.51
By me or me and my sister.
00:21:58.55\00:22:01.05
Often times, my sister, I
remember, cried at the door,
00:22:01.08\00:22:06.45
at the window of our house
when I would go after school,
00:22:06.49\00:22:10.03
getting on the bus
00:22:10.06\00:22:11.79
because she had
the responsibility
00:22:11.83\00:22:14.26
of being the
mother with a little boy
00:22:14.30\00:22:17.07
that she really didn't raise.
00:22:17.10\00:22:19.00
Wow.
00:22:19.03\00:22:21.07
That she had to.
00:22:21.10\00:22:22.87
That she had to, yeah, yeah.
And to see you off at school.
00:22:22.90\00:22:26.27
Yes, and to see me after school.
00:22:26.31\00:22:29.04
I'm gonna ask you now,
00:22:29.08\00:22:30.65
we're gonna trans
this in just a little bit.
00:22:30.68\00:22:32.35
Okay.
00:22:32.38\00:22:33.72
And the latter
part of that scripture
00:22:33.75\00:22:35.65
where you said,
you liked the part
00:22:35.68\00:22:37.22
where God has
visited His people.
00:22:37.25\00:22:39.52
Yes.
00:22:39.55\00:22:41.12
Having had your up bringing
00:22:41.16\00:22:43.09
and pretty much
raising yourself,
00:22:43.12\00:22:45.59
how did God visit your
life after that experience?
00:22:45.63\00:22:50.17
As I became an adult,
00:22:50.20\00:22:51.80
God really had to
become a part of my life.
00:22:51.83\00:22:54.64
I mean, He didn't
have to but I had to have,
00:22:54.67\00:22:56.91
I had to allow Him
to be a part of my life
00:22:56.94\00:23:00.14
because I couldn't get
through life without Him.
00:23:00.18\00:23:04.05
I could not get
to where I am today
00:23:04.08\00:23:07.52
because without Him.
00:23:07.55\00:23:08.92
Wow, so you went to college,
00:23:08.95\00:23:14.32
Indiana University
00:23:14.36\00:23:16.32
and a special
person came into your life?
00:23:16.36\00:23:19.66
Yes, she did.
00:23:19.69\00:23:21.03
Who was that?
00:23:21.06\00:23:22.86
Well, in 1983,
00:23:22.90\00:23:25.50
I had the
pleasure of marrying Diane.
00:23:25.53\00:23:28.44
Oh.
00:23:28.47\00:23:29.80
Yes, and Diane became
a big part of my life.
00:23:29.84\00:23:33.61
Wow, how long have
you guys been married now?
00:23:33.64\00:23:35.84
We have been
married since 32 years.
00:23:35.88\00:23:39.98
32 years? 32 years.
00:23:40.02\00:23:41.98
So all of that lessons
that you've learned growing up
00:23:42.02\00:23:45.69
about responsibility,
00:23:45.72\00:23:47.36
all that advice that had
been given to you by other men,
00:23:47.39\00:23:50.29
you've now been able to put it
00:23:50.33\00:23:51.66
into a successful life yourself,
00:23:51.69\00:23:53.60
25 years doing accounting
and you have two children?
00:23:53.63\00:23:57.17
I have two
children. What are they doing?
00:23:57.20\00:23:59.43
My two children
are a joy to my life.
00:23:59.47\00:24:03.24
That I have a daughter
00:24:03.27\00:24:04.71
who is studying
to be a doctor...
00:24:04.74\00:24:08.41
Wow.
00:24:08.44\00:24:09.78
And a son who is a
film and video editor.
00:24:09.81\00:24:14.25
Oh, that's cool. Yes, yes.
00:24:14.28\00:24:15.62
It's very cool.
00:24:15.65\00:24:16.99
So I understand,
according to your wife's report
00:24:17.02\00:24:19.82
that you carried on the skills
00:24:19.85\00:24:21.76
that you learned as young
man into building your house?
00:24:21.79\00:24:25.89
I did, I often times tell people
00:24:25.93\00:24:29.53
that I have the things that,
00:24:29.56\00:24:31.67
I have the talent
and skill that I have
00:24:31.70\00:24:34.90
because of my father
teaching me how to build
00:24:34.94\00:24:38.17
and I actually ended up
building our house completely.
00:24:38.21\00:24:42.18
Really, from the
ground up? From the ground up.
00:24:42.21\00:24:44.85
How did you do that?
00:24:44.88\00:24:46.68
Your wife says that
you read out of the menu.
00:24:46.72\00:24:50.32
I read a book. You read a book?
00:24:50.35\00:24:52.05
I read a book and built a house.
00:24:52.09\00:24:53.76
Really? Yes, I read a book.
00:24:53.79\00:24:55.22
How big was the
house? Five bedrooms.
00:24:55.26\00:24:57.39
That's a big house. Yes, it is.
00:24:57.43\00:24:59.29
It's a very large
home, very large home.
00:24:59.33\00:25:01.43
So sounds like God
really visited you?
00:25:01.46\00:25:03.97
Yes, He did. Yes, He did.
00:25:04.00\00:25:06.00
In a major way
00:25:06.03\00:25:07.37
and gave you
incredible, incredible
00:25:07.40\00:25:09.64
talents and skills...
00:25:09.67\00:25:11.01
He took all of those experiences
00:25:11.04\00:25:13.34
that you had from your
life and then just blessed you
00:25:13.38\00:25:17.55
to be able to build a
house for your entire family
00:25:17.58\00:25:20.65
and others, five bedrooms.
00:25:20.68\00:25:22.38
Well, I realize that if
God was not a part of my life,
00:25:22.42\00:25:25.62
I would not be here today.
00:25:25.65\00:25:27.12
Wow.
00:25:27.16\00:25:28.49
So yes, He was,
God did visit us,
00:25:28.52\00:25:31.23
His people and
me, in particular.
00:25:31.26\00:25:34.10
So I guess now at this stage,
00:25:34.13\00:25:35.93
in your life
coming down the way,
00:25:35.96\00:25:37.37
you're looking
forward to grandchildren?
00:25:37.40\00:25:40.97
Not yet. Not yet?
00:25:41.00\00:25:42.34
Not yet. But at some point.
00:25:42.37\00:25:43.71
At some point in time,
yes. You may be a grandpappy?
00:25:43.74\00:25:45.97
I might be one day eventually,
but right now, my kids are,
00:25:46.01\00:25:50.35
I stay with my kids, you
know, but they're 20 or so,
00:25:50.38\00:25:53.52
20 some years old,
they're not kids anymore...
00:25:53.55\00:25:56.82
Right. One day...
00:25:56.85\00:25:58.52
Hard to say that, isn't
it? Yeah, it is, it is, it is.
00:25:58.55\00:26:02.62
They are going to
have children one day
00:26:02.66\00:26:04.33
and I'll be a
grandfather and hopefully,
00:26:04.36\00:26:07.10
I'll be able to
pass along to them
00:26:07.13\00:26:08.93
what it is that they
need to get through life,
00:26:08.96\00:26:12.93
like somebody did for me.
00:26:12.97\00:26:14.90
Praise God,
00:26:14.94\00:26:16.27
and for the young men
who're watching right now,
00:26:16.30\00:26:19.67
what could you
speak into their life,
00:26:19.71\00:26:21.54
what could you say for them?
00:26:21.58\00:26:23.78
Hold on to God's
hand... Hold on to God's hand.
00:26:23.81\00:26:26.92
That's the best, the best,
00:26:26.95\00:26:28.28
the best advice
that I can give them
00:26:28.32\00:26:30.42
is to hold onto God's hand
00:26:30.45\00:26:32.95
because He is the
only answer to these issues
00:26:32.99\00:26:37.16
and these problems,
00:26:37.19\00:26:38.79
as life gets more and
more and more difficult,
00:26:38.83\00:26:44.73
it's only God's hand
that will get us through.
00:26:44.77\00:26:48.20
That will get us through. Yes.
00:26:48.24\00:26:49.74
Would you offer a prayer please
00:26:49.77\00:26:51.11
to close out our program, Gregg?
00:26:51.14\00:26:52.54
I will do that, thank you. Okay.
00:26:52.57\00:26:55.04
Our Father in heaven,
00:26:55.08\00:26:56.41
we thank you so
much for the blessings
00:26:56.44\00:26:57.78
that you have given us.
00:26:57.81\00:26:59.91
Lord, we thank you for
giving us the opportunities
00:26:59.95\00:27:02.15
that you have provided for us
00:27:02.18\00:27:04.82
and, Lord, we
know that it's only
00:27:04.85\00:27:07.29
because of your leading
and guiding in our lives...
00:27:07.32\00:27:10.43
That we are able to
get through day by day...
00:27:10.46\00:27:14.23
Yes.
00:27:14.26\00:27:15.60
Lord, we thank you for
what you have done for us
00:27:15.63\00:27:17.97
and we pray that
as we take each step,
00:27:18.00\00:27:20.80
that you'll be
with us, in front of us,
00:27:20.84\00:27:23.30
behind us and beside us,
00:27:23.34\00:27:25.91
helping us and leading us
and telling us which way to go.
00:27:25.94\00:27:32.41
Lord, we pray that your
blessings will be upon us
00:27:32.45\00:27:35.95
and help us, Lord,
if each and everyday.
00:27:35.98\00:27:41.16
In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
00:27:41.19\00:27:44.06
Amen, amen,
00:27:44.09\00:27:45.43
thank you so much for
coming to the program, Gregg...
00:27:45.46\00:27:47.50
Thank you, Karen.
00:27:47.53\00:27:48.86
And for sharing your
story, I really appreciate it,
00:27:48.90\00:27:50.73
we certainly hope that
today's program offers hope
00:27:50.77\00:27:54.34
that there is a God who sees us,
00:27:54.37\00:27:57.17
who's in the midst
and is able to resurrect
00:27:57.21\00:28:00.64
what is dead into
life in your life.
00:28:00.68\00:28:03.75
Never forget, hold on,
00:28:03.78\00:28:05.65
don't let go, God
will carry you through.
00:28:05.68\00:28:08.35
God bless, have a great day.
00:28:08.38\00:28:10.02