It is estimated 10 to 20 percent 00:00:01.36\00:00:03.43 of the world's population 00:00:03.47\00:00:05.27 has an obsessive-compulsive disease called "Alcoholism." 00:00:05.30\00:00:10.31 Join us today on Issues and Answers 00:00:10.34\00:00:12.87 as we discuss this OCD, 00:00:12.91\00:00:16.88 and we discuss how we can give God all the glory 00:00:16.91\00:00:21.15 because He gives us victory. 00:00:21.18\00:00:23.22 Hi, I'm Shelley Quinn, 00:00:54.18\00:00:55.52 and we welcome you again to Issues and Answers 00:00:55.55\00:00:58.85 where we will be discussing a problem that faces humanity, 00:00:58.89\00:01:03.12 and what the Bible has to say as an answer. 00:01:03.16\00:01:06.39 Today, we're going to do something a little unique. 00:01:06.43\00:01:09.40 Our guest, our special guest is name Bob, 00:01:09.43\00:01:12.67 but we are not going to give you a last name, 00:01:12.70\00:01:15.10 and we're not going to show you his face entirely. 00:01:15.14\00:01:18.61 He will be in shadow 00:01:18.64\00:01:19.97 because he is a member of Alcoholics Anonymous 00:01:20.01\00:01:23.61 and we want to honor his anonymity. 00:01:23.65\00:01:27.85 But this is a gentleman who has an amazing testimony. 00:01:27.88\00:01:33.22 But mostly it's a story that gives God glory. 00:01:33.25\00:01:38.03 So let me introduce you to our special guest Bob. 00:01:38.06\00:01:41.76 Bob, we're so glad that you're here with us today. 00:01:41.80\00:01:44.43 And you know, usually we come out here, 00:01:44.47\00:01:46.23 we have some idea of where we're going. 00:01:46.27\00:01:49.00 And I have this little blank sheet of paper here, 00:01:49.04\00:01:51.87 I have no idea where we're going. 00:01:51.91\00:01:53.81 But I invited you to be on this program 00:01:53.84\00:01:58.78 because recently someone close to me 00:01:58.81\00:02:04.15 who I know was saved. 00:02:04.19\00:02:07.22 God offered them salvation. 00:02:07.26\00:02:09.59 I know they overcame their addiction, 00:02:09.62\00:02:12.59 but they never got beyond 00:02:12.63\00:02:18.93 letting go of this symptomatic thing, 00:02:18.97\00:02:21.60 the way they were trying to numb their pain, 00:02:21.64\00:02:23.24 the pain remained. 00:02:23.27\00:02:25.17 And you and I had discussed this, 00:02:25.21\00:02:28.24 and I wished I had known a little bit more about AA. 00:02:28.28\00:02:32.48 So welcome to the program. 00:02:32.51\00:02:34.68 We're going to give you free reign, 00:02:34.72\00:02:36.42 but I wish you would start by just telling us 00:02:36.45\00:02:38.65 a little of your story. 00:02:38.69\00:02:40.39 Well, first of all, thank you, Shelley, 00:02:40.42\00:02:41.99 it's a pleasure to be here. 00:02:42.02\00:02:43.36 And thank you for helping me 00:02:43.39\00:02:45.76 respect the tradition of AA of anonymity. 00:02:45.79\00:02:49.66 It's important that we don't bring attention to ourselves 00:02:49.70\00:02:52.90 as members of Alcoholics Anonymous. 00:02:52.93\00:02:55.64 We prefer to have our friends recommend us. 00:02:55.67\00:02:58.77 We don't promote AA aggressively through the media, 00:02:58.81\00:03:01.98 through celebrities and those types of things. 00:03:02.01\00:03:05.31 And really has everything to do 00:03:05.35\00:03:07.12 with putting the brakes on people 00:03:07.15\00:03:09.28 who would gain personal notoriety or possibly fame 00:03:09.32\00:03:13.52 or personal gain from their affiliation with AA. 00:03:13.56\00:03:17.33 So AA says, let's be humble about this, 00:03:17.36\00:03:20.30 let's carry the message without focusing on the messenger. 00:03:20.33\00:03:23.87 Amen. 00:03:23.90\00:03:25.30 And for me personally, it's a way to keep my pride 00:03:25.33\00:03:28.40 from getting out of hand from overcoming, you know, 00:03:28.44\00:03:32.67 the message and then helping me to think that I'm all that. 00:03:32.71\00:03:36.04 And eventually getting me back into a drink 00:03:36.08\00:03:38.28 which is what happens to people 00:03:38.31\00:03:40.65 if we let our pride get in the way, 00:03:40.68\00:03:43.15 we have no need for God. 00:03:43.18\00:03:45.25 It's really a story all about God. 00:03:45.29\00:03:48.09 And let me tell you a little bit of my story. 00:03:48.12\00:03:50.69 I've been sober since 1989. 00:03:50.73\00:03:53.63 That's 26 years at this point. 00:03:53.66\00:03:56.46 And it all started for me, 00:03:56.50\00:04:00.90 my drinking started when I turned 18. 00:04:00.94\00:04:04.01 I was raised in a good Christian home. 00:04:04.04\00:04:06.47 I have wonderful parents 00:04:06.51\00:04:08.64 who modeled Christianity for me 00:04:08.68\00:04:11.35 every day of my life growing up. 00:04:11.38\00:04:13.68 But at 18 years of age, 00:04:13.72\00:04:16.18 they had moved to another state 00:04:16.22\00:04:18.49 and I was in the college 00:04:18.52\00:04:20.59 where drinking was not allowed actually. 00:04:20.62\00:04:24.13 But there was an underground kind of gang of guys and gals 00:04:24.16\00:04:28.90 that would sneak off campus and find ways to get alcohol. 00:04:28.93\00:04:33.60 And on my 18 birthday, 00:04:33.64\00:04:35.57 it was finally legal in the state 00:04:35.60\00:04:37.27 that I was in to drink, 00:04:37.31\00:04:38.64 this is how many years ago it's been I guess. 00:04:38.67\00:04:41.68 And so I went on my birthday, 00:04:41.71\00:04:46.05 my 18th birthday, my friends, 00:04:46.08\00:04:47.72 my party friends as I call them, 00:04:47.75\00:04:49.78 took me to a bar and I had my first cigarette, 00:04:49.82\00:04:53.72 my first joint of marijuana, and my first drink, 00:04:53.76\00:04:57.36 all on the same night. 00:04:57.39\00:04:59.19 Now what happened when I took that first drink was of course, 00:04:59.23\00:05:03.73 I didn't care for the taste of it, 00:05:03.77\00:05:05.93 but I drank several drinks in quick succession. 00:05:05.97\00:05:09.24 And all of a sudden, 00:05:09.27\00:05:10.81 the alcohol traveled to my brain, 00:05:10.84\00:05:13.98 and when it did, I felt a euphoria, a freedom, 00:05:14.01\00:05:19.55 that's hard to describe for people 00:05:19.58\00:05:21.22 that have not had that experience. 00:05:21.25\00:05:23.69 All my life, I'd grown up 00:05:23.72\00:05:25.05 feeling like I was on the outside looking in. 00:05:25.09\00:05:27.76 I never felt good enough to be in the company of my peers. 00:05:27.79\00:05:31.79 I always felt like there was something wrong with me 00:05:31.83\00:05:34.23 that I was, you know, either... 00:05:34.26\00:05:38.90 I don't know it's a feeling of inadequacy, 00:05:38.93\00:05:40.94 you know, that a lot of people can relate to growing up. 00:05:40.97\00:05:44.34 And many people grow out of that, 00:05:44.37\00:05:45.87 but I never had, you know. 00:05:45.91\00:05:47.94 And alcohol allowed me to act the way I wanted to. 00:05:47.98\00:05:51.41 It made me 10 foot tall and bulletproof. 00:05:51.45\00:05:54.22 It made me good looking. 00:05:54.25\00:05:56.55 It allowed me to carry on conversations comfortably. 00:05:56.58\00:06:00.72 And that very night I drank to excess. 00:06:00.76\00:06:04.79 I drank so much that 00:06:04.83\00:06:09.86 I threw up several times that night, 00:06:09.90\00:06:12.03 I recall. 00:06:12.07\00:06:13.40 It was embarrassing, but honestly, 00:06:13.44\00:06:14.77 I didn't care because it just meant 00:06:14.80\00:06:16.24 that I could go back and drink more. 00:06:16.27\00:06:18.44 And that's not normal drink. 00:06:18.47\00:06:20.74 Most people have that reaction when they have a few drinks 00:06:20.78\00:06:24.55 that, you know, they get a little queasy 00:06:24.58\00:06:26.72 or their head gets a little light and they're done. 00:06:26.75\00:06:29.22 They want no more to do with it. 00:06:29.25\00:06:31.15 But for me, it was like, I want a lot more. 00:06:31.19\00:06:34.49 And I didn't care what price I had to pay. 00:06:34.52\00:06:37.19 I fell in love with alcohol that first night 00:06:37.23\00:06:39.89 and I promised myself 00:06:39.93\00:06:41.26 that I would do anything for this feeling 00:06:41.30\00:06:44.27 if I can feel like this all the time, 00:06:44.30\00:06:46.47 I will do whatever it takes. 00:06:46.50\00:06:48.47 Now, Bob, you were saying some things. 00:06:48.50\00:06:50.94 Let me just back up a little bit. 00:06:50.97\00:06:53.61 I've heard a number of people 00:06:53.64\00:06:57.01 who have the disease of alcoholism. 00:06:57.05\00:07:00.78 And we are going to call it a disease 00:07:00.82\00:07:02.38 because it is an obsessive-compulsive disorder. 00:07:02.42\00:07:05.92 This is not just somebody that is a moderate drinker 00:07:05.95\00:07:09.99 or partier or a heavy drinker. 00:07:10.03\00:07:11.89 I mean, people can be heavy drinkers 00:07:11.93\00:07:13.56 and not be alcoholics. 00:07:13.60\00:07:15.03 For the alcoholic, quite often, it is... 00:07:15.06\00:07:19.13 I mean there's two types. 00:07:19.17\00:07:20.50 We've discussed this before, there's two types, one who... 00:07:20.54\00:07:23.91 the first drink they take, that's it. 00:07:23.94\00:07:26.11 That's right. 00:07:26.14\00:07:27.48 It's just, they're hooked. 00:07:27.51\00:07:29.38 Others who have, it's more of an... 00:07:29.41\00:07:32.55 it's kind of like the difference between 00:07:32.58\00:07:34.15 type 1 diabetes and type 2 diabetes. 00:07:34.18\00:07:36.58 Others, it's something that over a some span of time, 00:07:36.62\00:07:41.06 their heavy drinking turns into a physical and mental problem. 00:07:41.09\00:07:45.49 But why do you... 00:07:45.53\00:07:51.47 before we go into any further, I want to explain 00:07:51.50\00:07:54.34 why we're talking about Alcoholics Anonymous. 00:07:54.37\00:07:59.81 I want you to explain what Alcoholics Anonymous is 00:07:59.84\00:08:02.98 because there are some Christians who think 00:08:03.01\00:08:05.21 any 12-step program that you're talking about 00:08:05.25\00:08:08.88 or Alcoholics Anonymous is void of God. 00:08:08.92\00:08:13.32 So you had this problem and we'll talk about it. 00:08:13.36\00:08:17.69 Various times how you disintegrated essentially. 00:08:17.73\00:08:23.23 But what is AA, and why did you finally choose AA? 00:08:23.26\00:08:29.47 Okay, I think I can define Alcoholics Anonymous best 00:08:29.50\00:08:34.64 by reading what we call our preamble. 00:08:34.68\00:08:36.64 Okay. 00:08:36.68\00:08:38.01 Which is a brief paragraph that explains 00:08:38.05\00:08:40.02 what AA is if you let me. 00:08:40.05\00:08:41.88 It says Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women 00:08:41.92\00:08:45.99 who share their experience strength 00:08:46.02\00:08:48.09 and hope with each other 00:08:48.12\00:08:49.46 that they might solve their common problem 00:08:49.49\00:08:51.73 and help others to recover from alcoholism. 00:08:51.76\00:08:54.63 The only requirement for membership is a desire 00:08:54.66\00:08:57.17 to stop drinking. 00:08:57.20\00:08:58.67 There are no dues or fees for AA membership. 00:08:58.70\00:09:02.14 We are self-supporting through our own contributions. 00:09:02.17\00:09:05.24 AA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, 00:09:05.27\00:09:09.18 organization, or institution, 00:09:09.21\00:09:11.21 does not wish to engage in any controversy, 00:09:11.25\00:09:14.32 neither endorses nor opposes any causes. 00:09:14.35\00:09:17.35 Our primary purpose is to stay sober 00:09:17.39\00:09:19.89 and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety. 00:09:19.92\00:09:23.02 There's a lot packed into that paragraph. 00:09:23.06\00:09:25.19 But it's a good definition of what AA is. 00:09:25.23\00:09:30.23 Every group in AA is autonomous. 00:09:30.27\00:09:32.97 We do not have a president who tells us 00:09:33.00\00:09:35.67 how to run our meetings or how to do things. 00:09:35.70\00:09:38.47 We have joined together with a common solution. 00:09:38.51\00:09:41.74 We have found that our solution is and must be 00:09:41.78\00:09:45.81 a power greater than ourselves which most of us call God. 00:09:45.85\00:09:49.48 So to say that it is the void of God is really unfortunate 00:09:49.52\00:09:53.76 that anybody would think that 00:09:53.79\00:09:55.26 because they obviously have not gone to an AA meeting. 00:09:55.29\00:09:58.23 If they would go to a meeting, I guarantee you, 00:09:58.26\00:10:00.86 they'd have a whole different perspective. 00:10:00.90\00:10:03.16 Because if I have no power, 00:10:03.20\00:10:06.67 our premise in AA is that we are powerless over alcohol, 00:10:06.70\00:10:10.91 that our lives have become unmanageable. 00:10:10.94\00:10:13.81 Our very second step is that we came to believe 00:10:13.84\00:10:16.78 that a power greater than ourselves 00:10:16.81\00:10:18.55 could restore us the sanity. 00:10:18.58\00:10:20.28 And in the third step, 00:10:20.32\00:10:21.65 we formally with the prayer to God, ask Him, 00:10:21.68\00:10:26.82 while we turn our will and our lives 00:10:26.86\00:10:28.52 over to the care of God. 00:10:28.56\00:10:29.92 Every step in AA is designed 00:10:29.96\00:10:32.69 to help us establish that contact with God 00:10:32.73\00:10:36.13 who is the one who keeps every one of us sober. 00:10:36.16\00:10:39.40 However, we conceive of God, our concept of God, 00:10:39.43\00:10:43.34 just like any Christian must evolve. 00:10:43.37\00:10:46.17 We need to grow to know Him better. 00:10:46.21\00:10:48.48 In fact, one of our steps specifically talks about God 00:10:48.51\00:10:51.71 and says in step 11, 00:10:51.75\00:10:53.85 we seek through prayer and meditation 00:10:53.88\00:10:55.92 to increase our conscious contact with God. 00:10:55.95\00:10:58.89 That means to talk to Him more often, 00:10:58.92\00:11:01.06 to speak with Him about everything, 00:11:01.09\00:11:03.63 to share every moment with God. 00:11:03.66\00:11:05.39 To... 00:11:05.43\00:11:06.76 as the Bible says, pray without ceasing. 00:11:06.80\00:11:08.40 Yes. 00:11:08.43\00:11:09.76 That's the whole point of AA, because if there is no God, 00:11:09.80\00:11:14.40 there is no solution. 00:11:14.44\00:11:15.77 We are beyond human aid. 00:11:15.80\00:11:17.64 There is no human power that could possibly 00:11:17.67\00:11:20.11 restore me to sanity when it comes to alcohol. 00:11:20.14\00:11:22.84 But God does and did with me and does every day of my life, 00:11:22.88\00:11:27.42 I see those miracles happen. 00:11:27.45\00:11:29.32 You know, I think some people have... 00:11:29.35\00:11:33.66 there are Christians who will say, 00:11:33.69\00:11:36.22 AA refers to a higher power and that somehow bothers them. 00:11:36.26\00:11:41.53 I just want to share a quick story. 00:11:41.56\00:11:43.13 We had an engineer who... 00:11:43.16\00:11:44.50 my husband and I had an engineer 00:11:44.53\00:11:45.87 who worked for us, 00:11:45.90\00:11:47.24 he was in our employ and wonderful man. 00:11:47.27\00:11:50.31 And then I found out he, you know, 00:11:50.34\00:11:52.61 every day, he left early for lunch. 00:11:52.64\00:11:55.28 And I found that he was going to AA meetings. 00:11:55.31\00:11:57.31 And he'd been "clean and sober" for something like 12 years. 00:11:57.35\00:12:01.92 But the point is that he was telling me 00:12:01.95\00:12:05.82 because I always thought that AA was not based on God. 00:12:05.85\00:12:12.19 I just heard stories. 00:12:12.23\00:12:14.20 But he told me that yes, 00:12:14.23\00:12:15.56 they've started talking about the higher power. 00:12:15.60\00:12:17.73 He said if he thought it was religion, 00:12:17.77\00:12:21.50 he would have never gone to a meeting. 00:12:21.54\00:12:23.57 But they told him, "You've got to have a higher power." 00:12:23.61\00:12:26.94 He said, "I chose tree as my higher power." 00:12:26.98\00:12:29.18 He said, "And I was kneeling before 00:12:29.21\00:12:30.81 that tree one day praying," and he said suddenly, 00:12:30.85\00:12:34.58 he heard the voice in his head that said, 00:12:34.62\00:12:37.55 "My name is Jesus Christ and I am your higher power." 00:12:37.59\00:12:42.82 That was very fascinating to me and since that time, 00:12:42.86\00:12:46.86 maybe I've become more sensitive. 00:12:46.90\00:12:49.06 I've met so many people 00:12:49.10\00:12:51.30 who were not brought up in church like you, 00:12:51.33\00:12:55.90 who had not been introduced to the Lord 00:12:55.94\00:12:58.84 until they went to AA, 00:12:58.87\00:13:02.18 and that's where they found God and eventually Jesus Christ, 00:13:02.21\00:13:06.65 His Son and as their Savior. 00:13:06.68\00:13:08.88 So would you agree 00:13:08.92\00:13:12.22 that the 12-steps of recovery 00:13:12.25\00:13:18.06 that AA promotes 00:13:18.09\00:13:22.46 are all Bible based steps? 00:13:22.50\00:13:25.47 They are based in a variety of things, 00:13:25.50\00:13:28.30 but every one of them has Christian principles in them. 00:13:28.34\00:13:31.87 They follow the principles that are set out in the Bible. 00:13:31.91\00:13:35.01 And honestly, many other religions also have 00:13:35.04\00:13:38.68 some of those principles. 00:13:38.71\00:13:40.42 But if you look at the total literature, 00:13:40.45\00:13:43.39 if you look at the program of recovery, 00:13:43.42\00:13:45.25 the 12 steps of recovery, they're based on honesty. 00:13:45.29\00:13:49.56 The first part is to admit our powerlessness 00:13:49.59\00:13:52.43 and that requires honesty. 00:13:52.46\00:13:54.26 Open mindedness, if you don't believe in God, 00:13:54.30\00:13:56.73 at least open your mind to the possibility 00:13:56.77\00:13:59.23 that there might be something out there. 00:13:59.27\00:14:00.64 Right. 00:14:00.67\00:14:02.00 Step two, came to believe that a power greater than ourselves 00:14:02.04\00:14:04.61 could restore us the sanity, does not require belief, 00:14:04.64\00:14:07.64 it requires a suspicion. 00:14:07.68\00:14:10.31 I suspect there may be something out there 00:14:10.35\00:14:13.15 and that little wedge is all it takes 00:14:13.18\00:14:15.48 for the light to shine through. 00:14:15.52\00:14:17.65 Because God is eager to show us that He is real. 00:14:17.69\00:14:22.39 He is... 00:14:22.42\00:14:24.09 if you will standing on his head 00:14:24.13\00:14:25.79 to try to get us to notice him. 00:14:25.83\00:14:27.80 And suddenly, when we stop saying, 00:14:27.83\00:14:30.60 I will never believe in God to, well, I don't know. 00:14:30.63\00:14:34.44 Maybe there is, maybe there isn't, 00:14:34.47\00:14:35.80 that's all it takes. 00:14:35.84\00:14:37.67 Because AA says, we can start working from there 00:14:37.71\00:14:40.74 and eventually you will see so much evidence. 00:14:40.78\00:14:43.98 You know, I don't... 00:14:44.01\00:14:45.35 we have many agnostics that come to AA 00:14:45.38\00:14:47.82 and a lot of people don't understand that term. 00:14:47.85\00:14:50.49 There are believers like you and me that believe in God. 00:14:50.52\00:14:53.56 We believe, it can be proven. 00:14:53.59\00:14:54.99 We are proof that God exists. 00:14:55.02\00:14:57.13 There are people who are unbelievers 00:14:57.16\00:14:59.13 who believe they can prove there is no God. 00:14:59.16\00:15:01.53 And then there's the agnostic. 00:15:01.56\00:15:03.13 And I'm sure you know all about it, 00:15:03.16\00:15:04.97 how the beginnings of agnosticism started, 00:15:05.00\00:15:07.57 but the bottom line is an agnostic simply says, 00:15:07.60\00:15:10.47 "Well, there seems to be evidence that God exists 00:15:10.51\00:15:13.58 and evidence that he doesn't." 00:15:13.61\00:15:15.11 But there's not a preponderance of evidence 00:15:15.14\00:15:17.05 on either side that it won't tip 00:15:17.08\00:15:18.85 the scales all the way. 00:15:18.88\00:15:20.32 So the easiest thing for me to do, 00:15:20.35\00:15:23.22 so that I'm not constantly arguing 00:15:23.25\00:15:25.65 if there is or isn't in my head is to say, it's unknowable. 00:15:25.69\00:15:29.49 You can't possibly prove it either way, so it's unknowable. 00:15:29.52\00:15:33.26 Well, that's not true either. 00:15:33.29\00:15:35.06 And AA works a lot with agnostics. 00:15:35.10\00:15:37.83 AA says, "Okay, look at the evidence. 00:15:37.87\00:15:40.97 Let's look at the evidence." 00:15:41.00\00:15:42.47 And when I sit in an AA meeting as an agnostic 00:15:42.50\00:15:45.44 or even an atheist, 00:15:45.47\00:15:46.88 it doesn't take long before I see the miracles happening. 00:15:46.91\00:15:50.48 I see people changing right in front of my eyes. 00:15:50.51\00:15:53.05 And every one of them 00:15:53.08\00:15:54.72 in some way or another will attributed to 00:15:54.75\00:15:57.59 in the beginning a higher power, 00:15:57.62\00:15:59.35 if they don't believe. 00:15:59.39\00:16:00.89 And eventually call that higher power God. 00:16:00.92\00:16:03.49 And many times, I've heard people in AA meeting say, 00:16:03.53\00:16:07.00 you know, "I'm so grateful to Jesus Christ 00:16:07.03\00:16:09.80 who is my higher power." 00:16:09.83\00:16:11.63 I've also heard people say, 00:16:11.67\00:16:13.27 "I'm grateful to nature who is my higher power." 00:16:13.30\00:16:16.64 Well, if you look at the book of nature long enough, 00:16:16.67\00:16:18.77 you're going to find God. 00:16:18.81\00:16:20.14 Yes. 00:16:20.18\00:16:21.51 And AA does not concern itself with what religion you are 00:16:21.54\00:16:24.71 or have been, what your beliefs are, 00:16:24.75\00:16:27.68 even if they're a little off the wall. 00:16:27.72\00:16:29.72 We don't care, because we believe 00:16:29.75\00:16:31.65 that God will work with you. 00:16:31.69\00:16:33.02 If you're sincerely looking for God, 00:16:33.05\00:16:35.69 He will make sure you find Him. 00:16:35.72\00:16:38.76 He doesn't have to find us. 00:16:38.79\00:16:40.73 He knows where we are. 00:16:40.76\00:16:42.40 But eventually will discover God and, 00:16:42.43\00:16:45.60 you know, I think the hardest part for Christians 00:16:45.63\00:16:48.84 to understand is that if you go to an AA meeting, 00:16:48.87\00:16:53.84 you will see miracles every day. 00:16:53.88\00:16:56.34 Every day, I hear new people coming in. 00:16:56.38\00:16:59.81 And within a few days and weeks, 00:16:59.85\00:17:02.28 people that use the name of God 00:17:02.32\00:17:03.69 only to swear are now calling on Him for help. 00:17:03.72\00:17:07.72 Amen. Amen. 00:17:07.76\00:17:09.26 I had the experience, I have to share this. 00:17:09.29\00:17:10.93 Last night, I'm working with a young man 00:17:10.96\00:17:14.66 who is an alcoholic definitely and also a heroin addict. 00:17:14.70\00:17:19.03 And he's been sober and clean now for about, I think 55 days. 00:17:19.07\00:17:25.81 And last night, as it always happens, 00:17:25.84\00:17:28.48 you know, we got on to the topic of prayer. 00:17:28.51\00:17:31.15 And I asked him his background and he says, 00:17:31.18\00:17:33.42 "Bobby, I don't know how to pray. 00:17:33.45\00:17:35.28 I was raised in a Godless family. 00:17:35.32\00:17:38.02 I want to, I'm starting to like say, 00:17:38.05\00:17:40.99 God please take these thoughts away 00:17:41.02\00:17:42.69 and they seem to be going away. 00:17:42.72\00:17:44.39 But I really don't know how to pray." 00:17:44.43\00:17:46.90 And I said, "Well, you're not alone, 00:17:46.93\00:17:48.53 many people have come into AA that don't know how to pray." 00:17:48.56\00:17:51.47 And I said, "I just speak to God like I speak to you." 00:17:51.50\00:17:55.14 And by the end of the conversation, I said, 00:17:55.17\00:17:57.14 "Would you like me to pray 00:17:57.17\00:17:58.51 so that you can hear how I pray," 00:17:58.54\00:18:00.94 and he said, "Yes." 00:18:00.98\00:18:02.94 And so from a man who is facing court problems 00:18:02.98\00:18:06.11 and a lot of anxiety over all of that. 00:18:06.15\00:18:09.05 I prayed and I ask God to give him peace. 00:18:09.08\00:18:12.89 And by the end of that prayer, he says, 00:18:12.92\00:18:14.86 "Wow, I feel that peace." Praise God. 00:18:14.89\00:18:18.63 This is weird, and I thought, there you go, 00:18:18.66\00:18:21.03 that's all it takes is a little bit of evidence. 00:18:21.06\00:18:23.67 And I said, look at the evidence, 00:18:23.70\00:18:25.57 look for the evidence. 00:18:25.60\00:18:26.94 If you're looking for God, you are sure to find Him. 00:18:26.97\00:18:29.47 The Bible promises us that, 00:18:29.50\00:18:32.11 "If you will seek Me, you will find Me.' 00:18:32.14\00:18:33.81 Amen. 00:18:33.84\00:18:35.18 And just trying to pray, you know, 00:18:35.21\00:18:36.54 one of the most beautiful things I ever hear in AA 00:18:36.58\00:18:39.68 is somebody's first prayer. 00:18:39.71\00:18:42.02 And I've had that privilege over and over and over. 00:18:42.05\00:18:45.65 And, you know, the reason we wanted you to come today 00:18:45.69\00:18:49.12 or specifically I will say, it was me who invited you 00:18:49.16\00:18:52.99 is that we want to show and believe that 00:18:53.03\00:18:59.43 we absolutely know God is the one who heals, 00:18:59.47\00:19:02.60 God gets all of the glory. 00:19:02.64\00:19:03.97 Yes. 00:19:04.01\00:19:05.34 This program is based on Christian principles 00:19:05.37\00:19:08.84 or you'll find Christian principles in everyone. 00:19:08.88\00:19:11.35 What I like about the 12-steps is that, you know, 00:19:11.38\00:19:17.32 from what I've heard about it from you. 00:19:17.35\00:19:20.09 There is accountability, but also as you... 00:19:20.12\00:19:24.69 I mean there's just surrendering to God, 00:19:24.73\00:19:26.80 yielding to God's control. 00:19:26.83\00:19:28.66 There's this accountability, but also that the program 00:19:28.70\00:19:32.57 then puts you into discipleship if you will. 00:19:32.60\00:19:35.77 You take your testimony, 00:19:35.80\00:19:37.24 now you start working with someone else 00:19:37.27\00:19:39.61 which is what you call a sponsor. 00:19:39.64\00:19:41.74 So I think all the way around, this is something that 00:19:41.78\00:19:46.11 Christians sometimes will say, I don't want to go to AA, 00:19:46.15\00:19:50.69 'cause I know God can heal me. 00:19:50.72\00:19:52.49 And somehow, I've seen some people 00:19:52.52\00:19:57.76 who may be have quit drinking, but they're dry drunks. 00:19:57.79\00:20:01.63 Yes. 00:20:01.66\00:20:03.00 And I'm not saying that you have to go to AA, 00:20:03.03\00:20:04.43 there's other programs, 00:20:04.47\00:20:05.80 but there's a beauty in these 12 steps. 00:20:05.83\00:20:07.94 So explain what I just said about the dry drunk, 00:20:07.97\00:20:10.61 so people will understand where we are? 00:20:10.64\00:20:11.97 Sure. 00:20:12.01\00:20:13.34 A dry drunk by our definition is simply 00:20:13.38\00:20:15.14 somebody who does not drink, but still acts like they were. 00:20:15.18\00:20:19.98 In other words, the dishonesty, the meanness... 00:20:20.02\00:20:22.55 Anger. 00:20:22.58\00:20:23.92 The resentments, the anger, the fears, 00:20:23.95\00:20:25.42 all of those things are unmitigated because... 00:20:25.45\00:20:28.19 and actually worse because they don't have 00:20:28.22\00:20:31.26 the numbing effect of alcohol. 00:20:31.29\00:20:32.89 Okay. 00:20:32.93\00:20:34.26 So now you're left with... 00:20:34.30\00:20:35.63 I'm left with all my character defects 00:20:35.66\00:20:38.17 that started me drinking in the first place. 00:20:38.20\00:20:40.30 And I want to make it clear that alcoholism is a symptom of 00:20:40.34\00:20:43.61 what's really wrong with us. 00:20:43.64\00:20:45.11 Amen. 00:20:45.14\00:20:46.47 AA says, "Selfishness, self-centeredness, 00:20:46.51\00:20:49.04 fear, resentment, shame, guilt, anger, 00:20:49.08\00:20:53.65 those are the things that are wrong with us. 00:20:53.68\00:20:55.78 And those are spiritual maladies. 00:20:55.82\00:20:57.99 AA deals with a spiritual solution to a physical, 00:20:58.02\00:21:01.59 and mental, and spiritual problem. 00:21:01.62\00:21:03.73 So alcoholism is a spiritual, physical, and mental problem. 00:21:03.76\00:21:08.73 Absolutely, illnesses. 00:21:08.76\00:21:10.97 It's a malady of those three things combined. 00:21:11.00\00:21:14.50 So how does it become... 00:21:14.54\00:21:16.84 I can see where it's spiritual. 00:21:16.87\00:21:18.47 Sure. 00:21:18.51\00:21:19.84 I can see where it's mental. 00:21:19.87\00:21:21.34 How does that become a physical problem, 00:21:21.38\00:21:23.68 I mean a physical disease? 00:21:23.71\00:21:25.31 You started the program by talking about OCD 00:21:25.35\00:21:27.62 and that's a good model that we can use. 00:21:27.65\00:21:29.92 I'm not sure that the psychiatric world 00:21:29.95\00:21:32.52 uses that term per se on alcoholism. 00:21:32.55\00:21:35.52 But it starts with, you know, running the show ourselves. 00:21:35.56\00:21:39.03 In other words, we play God, that's obvious. 00:21:39.06\00:21:42.30 Every person who knows an alcoholic, 00:21:42.33\00:21:44.57 they're making their own decisions, 00:21:44.60\00:21:46.47 they will not allow anybody else to help them, 00:21:46.50\00:21:49.64 they will call all their shots, 00:21:49.67\00:21:51.01 especially if their drinking is in question, 00:21:51.04\00:21:53.34 they will guard their drinking carefully. 00:21:53.38\00:21:55.34 I'll call my shots when it comes to that. 00:21:55.38\00:21:57.31 And I'm trying to run my world and it's not working very well. 00:21:57.35\00:22:00.85 So I retreat into alcohol as a crutch, 00:22:00.88\00:22:04.15 as a way to calm my anger, 00:22:04.19\00:22:06.82 as a way to forget about my problems, whatever it is. 00:22:06.86\00:22:09.69 So in that way... 00:22:09.72\00:22:11.06 Self medicating. Yes. 00:22:11.09\00:22:12.43 It's self medicating, exactly. 00:22:12.46\00:22:16.53 Let me start with the mental part. 00:22:16.56\00:22:18.23 Alcoholics, every one of us has this peculiar mental twist 00:22:18.27\00:22:24.37 that allows us to believe that this time it will be different. 00:22:24.41\00:22:29.11 If I'm trying to control my alcohol 00:22:29.14\00:22:31.48 and I didn't do so well last night. 00:22:31.51\00:22:33.18 Well, today is a different day. 00:22:33.21\00:22:34.68 Today, I won't take so much money with me to the bar. 00:22:34.72\00:22:37.55 Today, I'm not going to drink whiskey, 00:22:37.59\00:22:40.56 I'm only going to drink beer. 00:22:40.59\00:22:42.56 Today, I'm only going to, you know, 00:22:42.59\00:22:44.69 have two drinks and I'm walking away, what. 00:22:44.73\00:22:47.50 There's this obsession, like you said, with alcohol. 00:22:47.53\00:22:51.80 I'm always thinking of alcohol. 00:22:51.83\00:22:53.27 When I'm not drinking, 00:22:53.30\00:22:54.64 I'm either remembering the good times I had 00:22:54.67\00:22:56.84 or I'm thinking about the good times I will have 00:22:56.87\00:22:59.37 or I'll think about the different route I'll take home 00:22:59.41\00:23:02.54 so I don't get in trouble with the police. 00:23:02.58\00:23:04.51 Every thought of an alcoholic is centered around alcohol. 00:23:04.55\00:23:08.72 That's an obsession. 00:23:08.75\00:23:10.55 We are obsessed with alcohol, we think about it all the time. 00:23:10.59\00:23:13.92 And then we fall for the little lie that says 00:23:13.96\00:23:16.42 this time it will be different. 00:23:16.46\00:23:18.59 And once we start drinking, 00:23:18.63\00:23:20.50 the physical part that you asked about, 00:23:20.53\00:23:22.56 we trigger a compulsion, a physical compulsion. 00:23:22.60\00:23:26.43 AA calls it a physical craving for more. 00:23:26.47\00:23:30.27 So once I put any alcohol in my body whatsoever, 00:23:30.31\00:23:33.51 it sets up that physical part and my body says, 00:23:33.54\00:23:36.75 okay, we're going to drink. 00:23:36.78\00:23:38.18 And then when I have two or three drinks, 00:23:38.21\00:23:39.91 my head says, "Stop," my body says, "No." 00:23:39.95\00:23:44.02 And then pretty soon, my head is screaming, 00:23:44.05\00:23:46.52 "You can't do this, you're spending the money, 00:23:46.55\00:23:50.06 you need to pay for rent or your car payment. 00:23:50.09\00:23:52.53 Why are you doing this, stop, please stop." 00:23:52.56\00:23:55.53 And our bodies take over and say, 00:23:55.56\00:23:56.90 "We're not going to stop until we're locked up 00:23:56.93\00:23:59.73 or pass out or run out of money or whatever." 00:23:59.77\00:24:03.67 We have to physically be released 00:24:03.71\00:24:06.44 from the compulsion part by stopping drinking 00:24:06.47\00:24:10.18 before that compulsion will stop and then, 00:24:10.21\00:24:13.28 you know, unfortunately our brains get us to do it. 00:24:13.31\00:24:15.65 Generally, the next day 00:24:15.68\00:24:17.02 or the next week we start up again. 00:24:17.05\00:24:18.69 We have incredibly short memories. 00:24:18.72\00:24:20.52 We cannot remember the pain and the suffering 00:24:20.56\00:24:23.22 of even a few hours ago. 00:24:23.26\00:24:25.73 Because this time it will be different, 00:24:25.76\00:24:27.86 that's the lie that happens, that's the mental illness. 00:24:27.90\00:24:30.97 What kind of person would stick their hand 00:24:31.00\00:24:32.83 on a hot stove every day 00:24:32.87\00:24:34.34 saying it's not going to burn me today? 00:24:34.37\00:24:36.00 So about how long did you drink? 00:24:36.04\00:24:39.11 I drank for 11 years. 00:24:39.14\00:24:41.44 And how bad did it get? 00:24:41.48\00:24:45.51 Well, I got to the point where 00:24:45.55\00:24:50.99 I couldn't imagine living another day 00:24:51.02\00:24:53.72 with or without alcohol. 00:24:53.76\00:24:55.89 I was desperate, I was hopeless, 00:24:55.92\00:24:59.09 I wanted to die, 00:24:59.13\00:25:00.46 I tried to end my life more than once, 00:25:00.50\00:25:04.77 I was in real financial straits. 00:25:04.80\00:25:09.44 I had no friends left in the world. 00:25:09.47\00:25:12.27 My job was hanging by a thread, 00:25:12.31\00:25:16.18 and I didn't know what was wrong. 00:25:16.21\00:25:18.21 That's the sad part. 00:25:18.25\00:25:19.58 What kind of physical effect... 00:25:19.61\00:25:20.95 we only have about a minute or two left, 00:25:20.98\00:25:22.32 but tell me what was the physical effect? 00:25:22.35\00:25:24.85 I had gained a lot of weight. 00:25:24.89\00:25:26.22 I hadn't gotten to the point where I was, 00:25:26.25\00:25:28.39 you know, in trouble with my liver or anything yet, 00:25:28.42\00:25:31.59 but it wouldn't have been much longer, so. 00:25:31.63\00:25:34.00 Okay. 00:25:34.03\00:25:35.60 So you finally reached that point. 00:25:35.63\00:25:40.24 Now you already knew God. Yes. 00:25:40.27\00:25:43.67 I mean, you have a very godly family. 00:25:43.71\00:25:47.51 And not just somebody that's speaking it, 00:25:47.54\00:25:50.45 but somebody that walks out. 00:25:50.48\00:25:53.48 They walk in the footsteps of Jesus. 00:25:53.52\00:25:55.82 So how did you end up at AA? 00:25:55.85\00:25:59.39 How did you end up... 00:25:59.42\00:26:01.32 I mean you cried out to God, 00:26:01.36\00:26:02.76 who directed you to AA? 00:26:02.79\00:26:05.43 Well, I think God did obviously. 00:26:05.46\00:26:07.53 I had one friend that I had just met at a party 00:26:07.56\00:26:11.53 if you can imagine. 00:26:11.57\00:26:12.97 And I didn't know he wasn't drinking alcohol. 00:26:13.00\00:26:15.27 He was the life of the party, 00:26:15.30\00:26:16.64 he lived down the street from me. 00:26:16.67\00:26:18.01 And one day, I stopped by and started talking to him. 00:26:18.04\00:26:20.84 And I asked him to go out drinking with me 00:26:20.88\00:26:22.61 and he refused. 00:26:22.64\00:26:23.98 And finally I just kept pressing him saying, 00:26:24.01\00:26:26.38 assuming he didn't have the money to go drink 00:26:26.41\00:26:28.38 and I said, "I'll buy it tonight, 00:26:28.42\00:26:30.19 and he says, "No." 00:26:30.22\00:26:31.55 And he says, "I need to go to a meeting," 00:26:31.59\00:26:32.92 and I said, "What kind of job do you have 00:26:32.95\00:26:34.49 that takes you back into work at night for a meeting." 00:26:34.52\00:26:37.09 He says, "I thought you knew. 00:26:37.13\00:26:39.06 I'm an alcoholic, I go to AA meetings." 00:26:39.09\00:26:41.73 And something inside of me, 00:26:41.76\00:26:43.13 I don't even know what, except God 00:26:43.16\00:26:45.23 put the words in my mouth, I said, 00:26:45.27\00:26:46.60 "Well, that's cool, can I go with you?" 00:26:46.63\00:26:48.67 And he said, "Sure." 00:26:48.70\00:26:50.31 That happened to be a young people's meeting. 00:26:50.34\00:26:52.64 They talked about these awful things 00:26:52.67\00:26:54.48 that had happen in their life. 00:26:54.51\00:26:55.84 The car crashes, and wrecks, 00:26:55.88\00:26:57.35 and the police, and all that other stuff. 00:26:57.38\00:27:00.18 And I compared myself right out the door 00:27:00.22\00:27:02.35 because they'll say it's not happened to me. 00:27:02.38\00:27:04.99 But it planted the seed in my head 00:27:05.02\00:27:08.06 which eventually got me to the point where 00:27:08.09\00:27:12.63 I don't know if I can tell the whole story 00:27:12.66\00:27:14.56 in just a few seconds, 00:27:14.60\00:27:16.30 but that planted the seed in my head. 00:27:16.33\00:27:18.80 And alcoholism was a topic on my mind 00:27:18.83\00:27:22.60 for the next few months 00:27:22.64\00:27:23.97 until I found my way to AA through 00:27:24.01\00:27:26.47 a very strange set of circumstances 00:27:26.51\00:27:28.38 that we can talk about next time. 00:27:28.41\00:27:29.74 All right. 00:27:29.78\00:27:31.11 And now we are so excited 00:27:31.15\00:27:32.51 that you are going to come back. 00:27:32.55\00:27:33.88 Thank you. 00:27:33.92\00:27:35.25 Because 26 years of sobriety is something to celebrate 00:27:35.28\00:27:39.15 and it is something that 00:27:39.19\00:27:40.76 not only have you been clean and sober, 00:27:40.79\00:27:43.56 'cause that's only one half of the first step. 00:27:43.59\00:27:46.93 That's right. 00:27:46.96\00:27:48.30 To be clean and sober doesn't mean 00:27:48.33\00:27:49.96 you've been healed. 00:27:50.00\00:27:51.43 What you've experienced 00:27:51.47\00:27:53.44 in these 26 years is a true healing on the inside. 00:27:53.47\00:27:58.61 And I happen to know Bob fairly well 00:27:58.64\00:28:00.94 and I see him growing day by day, 00:28:00.98\00:28:04.91 year by year, throughout the years 00:28:04.95\00:28:07.38 and it's really amazing. 00:28:07.42\00:28:08.75 So we hope that you will tune again next time with us 00:28:08.78\00:28:12.75 so that you also can know 00:28:12.79\00:28:16.62 how to share this information 00:28:16.66\00:28:19.89 with someone you love or someone who needs God. 00:28:19.93\00:28:23.47 Thank you for joining us. 00:28:23.50\00:28:24.83