Hello, I'm Shelley Quinn.
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And we welcome you
to Issues and Answers.
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This is a program
that talks about issues
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that are important
to today's population.
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And we provide answers...
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Practical
answers from the Bible.
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And today we have
a wonderful program.
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I think, you're going
to enjoy this so much.
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We will be speaking about
keys to optimal mental health.
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And our special guest
is Magna Parks-Porterfield.
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Magna is a PhD in
counseling psychology.
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And the thing I
love most about her
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is her humble spirit and
just Christ-like behavior.
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So let me introduce.
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Magna, so glad that
you're with us today.
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So good to be here, Shelley.
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Yeah, now where
are you living now?
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I'm actually
living on the campus
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of Uchee Pines Institute.
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All right.
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My husband is the
education director there,
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and we live there.
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Wonderful. Alabama.
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Alabama. Yes.
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But you don't have
that southern accent yet.
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Because I grew
up in New York City.
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Okay.
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Magna, tell us just a
little bit about yourself.
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Why did you pursue a PhD
in counseling psychology?
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Well, you know, Shelley,
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I actually
started out in nursing
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and then I went
to physical therapy
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but in the back of my
mind, I was always interested
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in listening to
people and observing people
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and I thought
why not do a career
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where I could get
paid for doing that.
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And I went into that
with that desire to listen,
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to observe, and then the
desire grew to help people.
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And I thought that if
I could get that degree,
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then I could help
people but then, you know,
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God brought me
through a path of recognizing
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that that's good,
it's a door opener,
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but His word has
everything that we need.
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And so I'm trying to mix
the two together when I can.
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Well, that's beauty
of when you have a close,
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intimate relationship
with the Lord of even though,
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you've got the
best of, you know,
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when you get your doctorate,
you've had the best training
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that's available in the...
what the world has to offer.
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But then you can supplement that
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with the truth from the Bible.
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So that's what's good.
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All right, so
let's just get into this
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because I'm really
anxious to hear about it.
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We're going to be
talking about the keys
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to optimal mental health.
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What is the first key?
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The first key...
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Can I say something
before the first key?
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Sure.
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How I came up
with these keys is that
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I'm very interested
in looking at science,
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true science that goes
along with what God's word says.
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I love it that
you said true science
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because if the science
contradicts God's word,
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we know that in the
years, it will correct itself
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because we see
over and over again
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that science has often
contradicted God's word,
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and usually people will say,
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"Well, that means
the Bible is an error."
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But you know, if you
wait just long enough,
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science will
correct itself, doesn't it?
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It does. It does.
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It comes into line
with what the Bible says.
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It does.
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So I started looking at science
for this particular show.
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And I've been
doing it for a while.
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And I said.
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What if science is showing
right now that goes along
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with the Word of
God for mental health?"
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Things that God told us
3000, 4000, or 5000 years ago
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that science is starting
to catch up, as I call it.
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So that's how I came up
with these different keys.
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And the first one that
the Lord revealed to me
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was the importance of
taking care of our bodies.
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You know, the Lord tells us
that our body is his temple,
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the Holy Spirit dwells there,
and He wants us to recognize
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that not only
for spiritual reasons
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but I think he
wants us to recognize that
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for physical and
mental health as well.
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I certainly know
that if your body...
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If you're suffering in
the body, what happens is,
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you can become, you know,
like when people get sick,
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they become...
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Essentially, you
become emotionally depressed
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after a while
because you're sick
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and tired of
being sick and tired.
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And then you can
become spiritually depressed
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and you're just, kind of,
there's a decline that happens.
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So, yes, I think
when the Lord told us,
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you know, there's
so much in the Bible
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that has to talk about
taking care of our bodies,
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and the reason
why is God knew that
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we are a whole, aren't we?
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That's right, we're
faithfully and wonderfully made,
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and when both of
those are put together,
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and it was so
exciting to me in 2011,
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and I was reading through
one of the psychology journals
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and a Dr Roger Walsh
actually from Australia,
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he looked at several
studies, 60 or 70 of them,
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and what he came up with is that
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if we take care of our bodies,
if we have a proper lifestyle,
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it can be just as effective.
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And I thought this
was powerful when he says,
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just as effective as drugs
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and counseling for
various mental health concerns.
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And I said, and he calls it
therapeutic lifestyle changes,
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exercising,
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he even talks about religious
and spiritual involvement,
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getting out into
nature, proper diet,
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getting proper sleep.
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And I was just jumping up
and down because, you know,
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we've known about this for years
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but now science has started...
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Hundreds of years, science
is starting to show that now.
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And, you know, we
certainly know that
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there are people
that if they're depressed,
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if they get outside
and get the sunshine
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so their body
can make vitamin D,
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so the body can make serotonin,
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God did, HE created us
to be active human beings.
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And, you know,
on one part of that,
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that I was
particularly interested in,
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we know about the diet
and all of that, you know,
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people know when
you eat properly.
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I have case studies
of examples of people
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I've worked with who...
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One young lady
was molested for years
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and when she came to me,
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she had been
through all this therapy.
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And God had already
started to change my way
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of working with people.
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And, Shelley, all I
did was change her diet,
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and she's
plopped in front of me.
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And at that point in
time, I was Dr Parks.
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She says, "Dr
Parks, I feel better
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than I felt out of
all these therapies
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where we went
through all my childhood."
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Praise God.
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And so I know
that the diet helps
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but one thing that's
really catching my attention now
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is nature.
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They actually have
come up with a term
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called nature deficit disorder.
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Really? Yes.
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So people who are
living say, in the inner city,
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who don't get out and get to see
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a beautiful sunset,
or trees, and the birds
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and that it actually
affects them mentally.
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Exactly.
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And they're tracing
back some of the emotional
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and behavioral problems
that children and adults
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are experiencing to
not being in nature.
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And they're talking
also about the fact that
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we have so immersed in media.
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Media is good.
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I mean, people are
watching now because of media.
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So I don't want to, you
know, completely bad mouth it
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but we're getting so involved
with the lack of reality,
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the artificial way of relating.
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We're not relating to
people one on one anymore,
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we're not
getting out into nature,
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and so we're saying
that because of that,
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this nature deficit disorder
is affecting us mentally.
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That's amazing. It is.
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And so, you know,
I always tell people,
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even if their living
in a city, find a park,
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try to go to it
as often as possible.
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Plant some pots right
outside on your patio.
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I mean, there
are things we can do
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to just get us in
touch with nature more,
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and it helps our mental health.
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It really can
enlighten us or help us.
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You know, it's
interesting because for me,
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I can't be in a room
where there's no greenery.
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I like green living
plants wherever I'm at.
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And it seems, I've heard
studies where they say that
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that actually
improves the air quality...
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Yeah, I have heard that too.
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Yeah. I heard that too.
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That's very interesting. It is.
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So one key for mental health,
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optimal mental health is
to enhance your lifestyle,
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get out in the
nature, eat better,
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exercise and all that.
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And another thing Dr
Walsh doesn't talk about this,
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we talk about
exercising your body.
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We also need to
exercise our minds.
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And what I mean by
that is we need to watch
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what we're reading,
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we need to watch
what we're watching,
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we need to be careful
with we're listening to
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because all of these things
can either exercise our mind
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or just kind of make
us passive receivers,
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and went on exercising it.
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And what you don't
lose, you use, right?
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What don't use, you lose.
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I said it the wrong way.
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I knew what you mean though.
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No, that's very, very good.
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So exercising the
mind is also important.
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That's critical.
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When, you know, the
thing that you're saying
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is be careful.
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We need to have a filter. We do.
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To what we let into our mind
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because there are certain things
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or certain types of music,
there are certain programs
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that you can watch
that you don't realize
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how it is effecting to
you in a very negative way.
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And you're not
really using your mind,
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you're just absorbing a
message from someone else.
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So that's a very good message.
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That's right, it can
effect your mental health.
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A quick story, I was
working with a young lady
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and she kept jumping in
and out of this relationship
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with this man who kept
going in and out of jail.
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And every time he get
out of jail, she would get,
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you know, take him back in
and again when she came to me,
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I had changed how
I work with people.
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So I started to ask her,
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"What type of
shows do you watch?"
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She says, "Oh, Jerry Springer."
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And, you know, these kind of
other different kind of shows.
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And I said,
"Well, what do you read?"
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"Oh, mostly novels."
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I said, "Tell you what,
we're going to go on a TV fast
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and a novel fast."
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She says, "I don't
know if I could do that."
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I said, "Let's just try
it. And I want you to read."
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And I have heard
this from another doctor,
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"I want you to read the
first chapter of Proverbs
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that corresponds to the day."
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I think, I first heard
that from Dr. Neonataly.
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And she says, "The
Bible is so boring."
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I said, "I promise you.
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As you take out the TV
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and you take out the
novels, the interest would..."
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What happened,
initially, it was hard for her
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but then she kept doing it.
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And, you know,
Shelley, for the first time,
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she was able to write
that man a "Dear John letter"
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and stay out of
that relationship
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for a long period of time.
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And she says,
"Why did that happen?"
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I said, "Because you started
to take care of your mind,
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so you could think more clearly,
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and you started
feeling it with scripture."
00:09:52.65\00:09:54.46
And that exercised her
mind to make better decisions.
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And she also began to, you know,
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you become what you behold,
if you're constantly beholding
00:09:59.83\00:10:04.17
stuff like, you know,
programs that are elevating
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that kind of
behavior to make it sound as
00:10:09.34\00:10:11.44
if it's normal, a
negative behavior is normal,
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then you won't break
free of those bad patterns.
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Yeah, that's good.
00:10:18.41\00:10:19.75
So those things are important.
00:10:19.78\00:10:21.12
That's really good. Yeah.
00:10:21.15\00:10:22.65
So a second key is looking
at how our thoughts affect us.
00:10:22.68\00:10:28.22
How do our thoughts affect us?
00:10:28.26\00:10:29.82
We get into a lot of
trouble because of our thoughts.
00:10:29.86\00:10:32.53
Just this morning,
Shelley, you don't realize
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but you changed
my thought for me.
00:10:34.60\00:10:36.06
You walked into the room
and you heard me sniffling.
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And you said, "Oh, it sound like
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you have the sniffles too."
00:10:39.50\00:10:40.84
I said, "Well, no.
00:10:40.87\00:10:42.20
I don't really
have the sniffles.
00:10:42.24\00:10:43.57
That's my nervous reaction."
00:10:43.61\00:10:44.94
And you says,
"Magna, it's just you and I
00:10:44.97\00:10:46.31
talking on the set.
00:10:46.34\00:10:47.68
Just think about you
and I talking on the set."
00:10:47.71\00:10:50.25
And I said, "Well, I'm
just going to let that thought
00:10:50.28\00:10:51.91
just keep going
through my mind."
00:10:51.95\00:10:53.28
And it actually
decreased my anxiety.
00:10:53.31\00:10:55.28
It did, it calmed me.
00:10:55.32\00:10:56.65
We get into a lot of
trouble because of the things
00:10:56.69\00:10:58.92
we say to ourselves.
00:10:58.95\00:11:00.29
I was in there getting
nervous because I'm thinking,
00:11:00.32\00:11:02.59
"This is going to be shown,
00:11:02.62\00:11:03.96
thousands of people
are going to watch it.
00:11:03.99\00:11:05.33
I'm going to be in
trouble," you know.
00:11:05.36\00:11:06.86
But because I changed
my thought, it calmed me.
00:11:06.90\00:11:10.23
And, you know, the thing
I think most about thoughts
00:11:10.27\00:11:14.17
is there are people
who rehearse the negative
00:11:14.20\00:11:19.07
just over and over.
00:11:19.11\00:11:20.71
And that actually
makes the emotions,
00:11:20.74\00:11:24.95
you get that.
00:11:24.98\00:11:26.31
The adrenal glands are
flowing, and you just get...
00:11:26.35\00:11:28.55
people get worked
up over something.
00:11:28.58\00:11:30.52
That may never happen, or else
they really focus on the past
00:11:30.55\00:11:35.42
and on the
negative things of the past.
00:11:35.46\00:11:37.53
And that's my next thought.
00:11:37.56\00:11:38.89
That is your thought,
oh. The next principle, yes.
00:11:38.93\00:11:41.06
But before we jump to
that, I just wanted to say too
00:11:41.10\00:11:43.50
that the bible
talked about it years ago.
00:11:43.53\00:11:46.10
Remember, Paul
in Philippines 4:8,
00:11:46.13\00:11:48.50
"Whatsoever things are true,
whatsoever things are honest,
00:11:48.54\00:11:52.07
just, pure,
think on these things."
00:11:52.11\00:11:54.81
And so if we train our
minds to think on things
00:11:54.84\00:11:58.05
that will be
elevating and enlightening,
00:11:58.08\00:12:00.72
it really will help us
to adjust better in life.
00:12:00.75\00:12:02.88
I know a
precious Christian woman
00:12:02.92\00:12:04.52
who said that she
spent some time at home
00:12:04.55\00:12:07.52
and became hooked
on daytime soap operas.
00:12:07.56\00:12:11.09
And something that surprised her
00:12:11.13\00:12:13.90
actually was
that she began to...
00:12:13.93\00:12:16.87
She said like
she was experiencing
00:12:20.70\00:12:23.47
for the first
time in her life lust.
00:12:23.51\00:12:26.31
And so if you're
watching this kind of thing,
00:12:26.34\00:12:28.68
we have to understand
that there's so many things
00:12:28.71\00:12:31.01
that affect our thought pattern.
00:12:31.05\00:12:33.15
And again, we're
back to media that it can,
00:12:33.18\00:12:36.08
if you're watching bad media,
00:12:36.12\00:12:37.45
it can affect you
know very negative way.
00:12:37.49\00:12:38.82
That's what I thought.
That's a very good point.
00:12:38.85\00:12:40.66
Yes.
00:12:40.69\00:12:42.02
So what I was going to move onto
00:12:42.06\00:12:43.39
was the third one
about not living in the past,
00:12:43.43\00:12:46.93
moving past the past,
00:12:46.96\00:12:48.80
and accepting
responsibility for our choices.
00:12:48.83\00:12:52.40
In my feel, I was taught that
00:12:52.43\00:12:54.14
when a person
comes in with problems,
00:12:54.17\00:12:56.17
I need to dig into
their past and find out
00:12:56.20\00:12:58.27
what has led to that problem.
00:12:58.31\00:12:59.97
That has some merit.
00:13:00.01\00:13:01.74
But sometimes, we can
stay too much in the past.
00:13:01.78\00:13:04.81
You just
rehearsing the negative.
00:13:04.85\00:13:06.21
Just rehearsing the negative
and that is not healthy.
00:13:06.25\00:13:09.78
Because, really, don't people...
00:13:09.82\00:13:11.22
when you go back and
relive things from the past,
00:13:11.25\00:13:14.39
quite often, it's the very
same emotions are coming up.
00:13:14.42\00:13:17.63
It's just like
going through it again.
00:13:17.66\00:13:19.93
And can I share a
Scripture with you?
00:13:19.96\00:13:21.80
Sure.
00:13:21.83\00:13:23.16
I just love this
Scripture because the Lord
00:13:23.20\00:13:24.53
really helped me.
00:13:24.57\00:13:25.90
There were a lot of
negative things in my past.
00:13:25.93\00:13:27.90
I grew up in a very
dysfunctional environment.
00:13:27.94\00:13:32.07
And this one is
Isaiah 43:18 and 19.
00:13:32.11\00:13:37.78
And here's what the Lord says,
00:13:37.81\00:13:39.85
"Do not remember
the former things
00:13:39.88\00:13:42.65
nor consider the things of old."
00:13:42.68\00:13:44.92
In other words,
don't dwell on the past.
00:13:44.95\00:13:47.99
"Behold, I will do a new thing.
00:13:48.02\00:13:51.13
Now it shall spring forth.
00:13:51.16\00:13:53.66
Shall you not know it?"
00:13:53.70\00:13:55.90
Oh, that's
beautiful. Isn't that?
00:13:55.93\00:13:57.27
I love that.
00:13:57.30\00:13:58.63
And when I got to
that I realized that
00:13:58.67\00:14:01.44
there were some
things from the past
00:14:01.47\00:14:03.81
that were kind of
anchoring me, if you will,
00:14:03.84\00:14:06.17
they were kind of
keeping me, holding me back.
00:14:06.21\00:14:09.14
So I think,
that's very important.
00:14:09.18\00:14:11.01
It is, it is.
00:14:11.05\00:14:12.38
We have to recognize
the past does affect us
00:14:12.41\00:14:14.75
but as adults we can
make decisions even now
00:14:14.78\00:14:18.89
that will either
help us or hurt us.
00:14:18.92\00:14:21.42
And so I think and
I've seen this where people
00:14:21.46\00:14:23.86
stay in the past and
it makes them victims
00:14:23.89\00:14:26.49
because what happens is,
"My parents did this to me
00:14:26.53\00:14:29.96
and that's why I
am, that's why..."
00:14:30.00\00:14:32.40
Yes. "Who I am right now.
00:14:32.43\00:14:34.30
You know, that's
what turned out to be
00:14:34.34\00:14:35.67
because of what my parents did."
00:14:35.70\00:14:37.04
We cannot undo
what our parents did
00:14:37.07\00:14:38.84
but we could deal with
what we are facing right now.
00:14:38.87\00:14:42.21
And so when we
can say to ourselves,
00:14:42.24\00:14:44.15
"This has happened in the past
00:14:44.18\00:14:45.51
but by God's help,
I can move forward,
00:14:45.55\00:14:47.78
I can become a
survivor instead of a victim,"
00:14:47.82\00:14:50.19
it gives us more of a
sense of power in our lives
00:14:50.22\00:14:52.35
and we don't feel as
victimized and helpless.
00:14:52.39\00:14:55.62
And you know what
I'm excited about?
00:14:55.66\00:14:56.99
I ran across a
group of psychologists,
00:14:57.03\00:14:58.86
they were doing research
and what they found was that,
00:14:58.89\00:15:01.63
"We need to encourage people
00:15:01.66\00:15:03.63
to start
looking at our parents,"
00:15:03.67\00:15:05.73
and I have to read this
'cause it was so powerful.
00:15:05.77\00:15:08.00
"Looking at our
parents as someone
00:15:08.04\00:15:10.71
with his or her own
or her own fragilities,
00:15:10.74\00:15:15.08
insecurities, and longings."
00:15:15.11\00:15:17.01
You know, I was
just getting ready
00:15:17.05\00:15:18.38
to say that
what helped me too...
00:15:18.41\00:15:19.75
Were you, Okay.
00:15:19.78\00:15:21.12
If you look into
the past and say,
00:15:21.15\00:15:22.55
"Okay, my mother
did the best she could
00:15:22.58\00:15:26.69
under the circumstances,"
00:15:26.72\00:15:28.49
or, "My father did
the best he could,"
00:15:28.52\00:15:30.86
and you may think,
"Well, there were abusive,"
00:15:30.89\00:15:33.33
but that means that
they were broken people
00:15:33.36\00:15:36.73
who didn't know
any better themselves,
00:15:36.77\00:15:39.33
they needed the counseling,
00:15:39.37\00:15:40.70
but you can't
let a broken person
00:15:40.74\00:15:43.84
what they've done
to you ruin your life.
00:15:43.87\00:15:47.31
Amen.
00:15:47.34\00:15:48.68
That's the bottom line. Yeah.
00:15:48.71\00:15:50.05
And they're saying
that when you do that
00:15:50.08\00:15:51.85
and, you know, I don't
want to be insensitive to people
00:15:51.88\00:15:54.15
who's going through some
horrible things as children,
00:15:54.18\00:15:57.19
so I don't wanna just...
00:15:57.22\00:15:58.55
I'm not just saying, you
know, brush off your knees
00:15:58.59\00:15:59.92
and just get up and keep moving.
00:15:59.95\00:16:01.29
It's a process.
00:16:01.32\00:16:02.66
But changing that perspective
is healthy not only for you
00:16:02.69\00:16:05.69
but it's healthy for
your current relationships.
00:16:05.73\00:16:08.33
If you have
children, it's healthy for them
00:16:08.36\00:16:10.97
because if you stay in the past
00:16:11.00\00:16:13.03
you cannot develop
those positive relationships
00:16:13.07\00:16:15.70
with your spouse,
with your partner,
00:16:15.74\00:16:17.77
with your children.
00:16:17.81\00:16:19.14
But once you start to
change your perspective
00:16:19.17\00:16:20.91
on what your
parents haven't done
00:16:20.94\00:16:22.28
and look at your
parents in a more empathic way
00:16:22.31\00:16:24.95
then that will help you to
have healthier relationships
00:16:24.98\00:16:27.48
right around you.
00:16:27.52\00:16:28.85
And you know, I
think I've been doing
00:16:28.88\00:16:30.59
a little
counseling with a young man
00:16:30.62\00:16:32.02
who has really... he is having
00:16:32.05\00:16:36.76
a difficult time
forgiving his mother
00:16:36.79\00:16:39.26
and his mother knew he
was being sexually abused.
00:16:39.29\00:16:42.80
She did nothing to protect him,
00:16:42.83\00:16:44.37
but she did nothing
to show him love either.
00:16:44.40\00:16:47.20
And, of course, there were drugs
00:16:47.24\00:16:48.94
and many things involved
and I think of all people,
00:16:48.97\00:16:52.84
it's probably the
most difficult to,
00:16:52.87\00:16:55.71
you know, you expect
your parents to care for you,
00:16:55.74\00:16:59.55
to nurture you,
especially your mother,
00:16:59.58\00:17:01.45
you expect to experience
that maternal kind of love,
00:17:01.48\00:17:06.55
and some people
are so sick themselves,
00:17:06.59\00:17:09.82
sad to say they shouldn't even
have children is what it is,
00:17:09.86\00:17:14.03
but you have to get beyond,
if you can get to that point
00:17:14.06\00:17:17.07
where you recognize that
00:17:17.10\00:17:18.43
parent was
troubled and a sick person,
00:17:18.47\00:17:21.40
then I think it
helps you get beyond.
00:17:21.44\00:17:22.94
It does, yeah.
00:17:22.97\00:17:24.31
That's an excellent point. Yes.
00:17:24.34\00:17:25.67
I remember working with
a woman who was molested
00:17:25.71\00:17:27.28
by several different men,
00:17:27.31\00:17:29.94
physicians,
teachers, it was just amazing
00:17:29.98\00:17:32.45
there's
something that happens with
00:17:32.48\00:17:33.92
sometimes when
people are molested
00:17:33.95\00:17:35.28
that they are
prone re-victimization...
00:17:35.32\00:17:36.65
Yes.
00:17:36.69\00:17:38.02
And so that
happened to her a lot.
00:17:38.05\00:17:39.55
But it was only as she
started to work on forgiveness
00:17:39.59\00:17:42.96
that she started to heal.
00:17:42.99\00:17:44.33
And I know you know of that
00:17:44.36\00:17:45.69
because I've heard
you talk about that
00:17:45.73\00:17:47.80
and that's the same perspective
of starting to reframe
00:17:47.83\00:17:51.40
how we look at our past.
00:17:51.43\00:17:52.93
It's so important for
optimum mental health.
00:17:52.97\00:17:55.20
I really believe that.
00:17:55.24\00:17:56.57
Amen.
00:17:56.60\00:17:57.97
Another one that
we could talk about
00:17:58.01\00:17:59.81
is looking at
happiness that lasts.
00:17:59.84\00:18:03.68
And there's so
much research, you know,
00:18:03.71\00:18:05.58
there's a new
branch of psychology,
00:18:05.61\00:18:07.15
I say new, it's maybe
been around 20 years or so,
00:18:07.18\00:18:09.45
called positive psychology.
00:18:09.48\00:18:11.72
This branch of psychology,
00:18:11.75\00:18:13.09
they decided
that, "You know what?
00:18:13.12\00:18:14.46
We're always
looking at abnormalities,
00:18:14.49\00:18:15.82
we're looking at schizophrenia,
we're looking at depression,
00:18:15.86\00:18:17.83
we're looking at all
these psychopathologies.
00:18:17.86\00:18:19.56
We want to look at
people's strengths now
00:18:19.59\00:18:22.46
because as you
encourage strengths,
00:18:22.50\00:18:24.33
you can even help
all of these disorders
00:18:24.37\00:18:26.37
that we're talking about
00:18:26.40\00:18:27.80
as opposed to just
focusing on the abnormalities."
00:18:27.84\00:18:30.54
Does that make
sense what I'm saying?
00:18:30.57\00:18:31.91
Yeah, absolutely.
00:18:31.94\00:18:33.27
So positive
psychology looks at things
00:18:33.31\00:18:34.64
and we're gonna talk about this
probably in the future like,
00:18:34.68\00:18:36.78
gratitude and joy and
all of that, trying to see
00:18:36.81\00:18:39.78
the human strengths that we have
00:18:39.81\00:18:41.55
and how that could help
us through various things,
00:18:41.58\00:18:44.19
and one of the
areas is happiness.
00:18:44.22\00:18:46.52
And what
psychologists are founding
00:18:46.55\00:18:48.66
is just amazing to me.
00:18:48.69\00:18:50.03
They have differentiated between
00:18:50.06\00:18:53.19
short term happiness
and long term happiness.
00:18:53.23\00:18:56.56
And they're saying
that with the former
00:18:56.60\00:18:59.47
we're always looking for
something to help us feel good,
00:18:59.50\00:19:02.07
you are never satisfied.
00:19:02.10\00:19:03.71
You want more money,
you want more degrees,
00:19:03.74\00:19:06.44
you want more relationships,
00:19:06.47\00:19:07.84
whatever you're looking
for that short term happiness,
00:19:07.88\00:19:10.91
you're never satisfied.
00:19:10.95\00:19:12.28
You know, the Bible
talks about broken cisterns?
00:19:12.31\00:19:13.88
Right. That's right.
00:19:13.92\00:19:15.25
The short term happiness
focus is like a broken cistern.
00:19:15.28\00:19:18.32
And so psychologists are
saying we need to be focusing
00:19:18.35\00:19:21.36
on happiness that lasts.
00:19:21.39\00:19:23.49
And they're
saying the way we do that
00:19:23.53\00:19:25.26
is to do something
that's worth doing,
00:19:25.29\00:19:27.90
to look at things
that's bigger than ourselves,
00:19:27.93\00:19:31.07
to try to get more
meaning and purpose in life,
00:19:31.10\00:19:34.07
and to fulfill our potential.
00:19:34.10\00:19:35.70
So these are the
things that they're saying
00:19:35.74\00:19:37.14
will bring long term happiness,
00:19:37.17\00:19:39.51
not just things to help
us feel good for the moment.
00:19:39.54\00:19:42.24
You know, how
interesting that science is
00:19:42.28\00:19:44.45
once again
catching up with the Bible.
00:19:44.48\00:19:46.28
Exactly.
00:19:46.31\00:19:47.65
When you said that,
Proverbs 15:13 came to my mind.
00:19:47.68\00:19:50.49
It says, "A merry heart
makes a cheerful countenance
00:19:50.52\00:19:54.32
but by sorrow of the
heart the spirit is broken."
00:19:54.36\00:19:58.49
If there are things,
you know, the way I put it
00:19:58.53\00:20:01.86
and I don't know if
you would agree, Magna,
00:20:01.90\00:20:03.90
but the way I put it is that
00:20:03.93\00:20:05.87
happiness is what I
call circumstantial.
00:20:05.90\00:20:10.37
Yes.
00:20:10.41\00:20:11.74
If your spouse has just
died you can't be happy.
00:20:11.77\00:20:14.34
Joy is something that, you know,
00:20:14.38\00:20:16.31
the joy of the
Lord is our strength,
00:20:16.34\00:20:17.68
so joy is something
that we can always experience
00:20:17.71\00:20:20.95
but happiness is something
that is circumstantial.
00:20:20.98\00:20:24.49
If I just fell and
broke my arm and I'm in pain,
00:20:24.52\00:20:28.42
it's hard to be happy.
00:20:28.46\00:20:29.79
But that is so important.
00:20:29.82\00:20:31.93
What you were
just saying is that
00:20:31.96\00:20:33.29
people who are
reaching out to do something
00:20:33.33\00:20:36.77
bigger than themselves
00:20:36.80\00:20:38.37
they find that they are lifted
rather than having this sorrow
00:20:38.40\00:20:43.44
hold them down,
they're being lifted up.
00:20:43.47\00:20:45.24
Amen. Amen.
00:20:45.27\00:20:46.61
Amen. Amen.
00:20:46.64\00:20:47.98
Listen to this
too that they found.
00:20:48.01\00:20:50.31
"This happiness
that's long term,
00:20:50.35\00:20:52.25
it is not problem-free,"
this is psychology talking,
00:20:52.28\00:20:56.22
"And it sometimes
brings personal hardship
00:20:56.25\00:20:59.35
and effort over the long term."
00:20:59.39\00:21:01.86
Boy, this is beginning to
sound more like the Bible.
00:21:01.89\00:21:04.16
That's what I
thought when I read that.
00:21:04.19\00:21:05.89
It said, "But the key
is that it will still bring
00:21:05.93\00:21:08.80
more life satisfaction
than pursuing activities
00:21:08.83\00:21:12.57
or emotions
merely for our pleasure."
00:21:12.60\00:21:14.64
Amen.
00:21:14.67\00:21:16.87
And I thought
about the beatitudes,
00:21:16.91\00:21:18.34
that immediately came to my mind
00:21:18.37\00:21:20.04
because when
Jesus said, "Blessed,"
00:21:20.08\00:21:21.58
He's really
meaning happy, right?
00:21:21.61\00:21:22.94
Yes.
00:21:22.98\00:21:24.31
"Happy are those who mourn,
00:21:24.35\00:21:25.68
happy are those
who are pure in heart,"
00:21:25.71\00:21:27.78
you know, it's like these things
00:21:27.82\00:21:29.42
don't come automatically.
00:21:29.45\00:21:30.85
There may be some
hardships that bring
00:21:30.89\00:21:33.02
some of this
meekness and the mourning
00:21:33.05\00:21:34.96
for their spiritual state
00:21:34.99\00:21:37.16
and all of these things
may come with some difficulties
00:21:37.19\00:21:40.20
but in a long run
you're going to have
00:21:40.23\00:21:41.96
the better sense of happiness.
00:21:42.00\00:21:43.60
Amen.
00:21:43.63\00:21:44.97
And I thought to myself,
00:21:45.00\00:21:46.33
the rocks are
crying out, really.
00:21:46.37\00:21:48.70
I believe that God
is allowing research
00:21:48.74\00:21:50.87
to show that His
Bible, not that He needed that
00:21:50.91\00:21:53.48
but because of our
human mind and how we think,
00:21:53.51\00:21:56.18
I believe He's allowing
these things to say, you know,
00:21:56.21\00:21:59.11
"All along I've had
this but you won't...
00:21:59.15\00:22:00.88
might not listen to
someone preaching at you,
00:22:00.92\00:22:03.02
so I'll allow researchers..."
00:22:03.05\00:22:05.52
To finally come up
with truth. It's amazing.
00:22:05.55\00:22:07.92
Magna, we are just
clipping through our time here.
00:22:07.96\00:22:10.76
Really?
00:22:10.79\00:22:12.13
So tell us what
you had another point
00:22:12.16\00:22:14.06
that you wanted to cover.
00:22:14.10\00:22:15.43
Yes, I did.
00:22:15.46\00:22:16.80
And that is we wanted to
talk about still another key
00:22:16.83\00:22:20.44
for optimal living and that is
00:22:20.47\00:22:22.54
I mentioned
monitoring changing...
00:22:22.57\00:22:23.91
Oh, I have to read this.
Can I just read this quote?
00:22:23.94\00:22:25.41
Sure. It comes
from Steps to Christ.
00:22:25.44\00:22:27.64
She says, "Happiness that
is sought from selfish motives,
00:22:27.68\00:22:31.78
outside of the path
of duty is ill-balanced,
00:22:31.81\00:22:35.65
fitful, and transitory."
00:22:35.68\00:22:37.75
Amen.
00:22:37.79\00:22:39.12
"It passes away and the
soul is filled with loneliness
00:22:39.15\00:22:42.02
and sorrow but there
is joy and satisfaction
00:22:42.06\00:22:45.63
in the service of God."
00:22:45.66\00:22:47.00
Amen. You know.
00:22:47.03\00:22:48.63
And for me to fully
understand that I went back to
00:22:48.66\00:22:50.83
what the psychologists
found where they said
00:22:50.87\00:22:52.50
that sometimes pursuing
this long term happiness
00:22:52.53\00:22:55.20
may bring some difficulties,
in the service of God
00:22:55.24\00:22:57.84
we're gonna have
some difficulties,
00:22:57.87\00:22:59.54
it won't always feel happy.
00:22:59.57\00:23:01.71
But God knew
that in the long term,
00:23:01.74\00:23:03.71
service to Him
brings true happiness.
00:23:03.75\00:23:05.51
Absolutely.
00:23:05.55\00:23:07.08
So it gives a
purpose to our life,
00:23:07.12\00:23:09.35
a life without purpose is empty.
00:23:09.38\00:23:11.52
That's right.
00:23:11.55\00:23:12.89
So do we have for one
more, time for one more point?
00:23:12.92\00:23:14.62
Sure. We do. Okay.
00:23:14.66\00:23:16.19
So let's talk
about this another key
00:23:16.22\00:23:17.99
that the Lord helped me to
find and that is taking time
00:23:18.03\00:23:21.43
to engage in activities
00:23:21.46\00:23:23.47
that are aimed
at helping others.
00:23:23.50\00:23:25.13
Oh, amen. So...
00:23:25.17\00:23:26.67
You know, that kind of, it just,
00:23:26.70\00:23:28.04
that really dovetails
with what you just said.
00:23:28.07\00:23:31.27
That that's where
true happiness is found
00:23:31.31\00:23:33.58
is when something is
bigger than yourself.
00:23:33.61\00:23:35.38
Amen, amen.
00:23:35.41\00:23:36.75
And Isaiah 58 says it
so well, the true fast...
00:23:36.78\00:23:38.81
Yes.
00:23:38.85\00:23:40.18
When he talks about the things
about ministering to the poor,
00:23:40.22\00:23:42.18
clothing the naked, and
giving bread to the hungry
00:23:42.22\00:23:45.12
but then in one of
the verses Isaiah says,
00:23:45.15\00:23:47.92
"Then the shall thy light
break forth as the morning
00:23:47.96\00:23:51.69
and thine health shall
spring forth speedily."
00:23:51.73\00:23:55.70
So these things
about helping others
00:23:55.73\00:23:58.07
can actually help our health,
not only our physical health,
00:23:58.10\00:24:01.60
I believe our
mental health as well.
00:24:01.64\00:24:03.61
Absolutely, that's perfect.
00:24:03.64\00:24:05.67
And there's so much
research now being done
00:24:05.71\00:24:07.61
on the importance of
generosity and altruism
00:24:07.64\00:24:12.01
and it just goes
back to the Bible
00:24:12.05\00:24:13.75
telling us about the
benefits that come from giving.
00:24:13.78\00:24:16.32
Amen.
00:24:16.35\00:24:17.69
You know, I'm
thinking of my sister,
00:24:17.72\00:24:19.15
I member once when
she was living in Chicago,
00:24:19.19\00:24:22.06
this is 25 years ago.
00:24:22.09\00:24:23.76
She called me, she
was depressed, Magna,
00:24:23.79\00:24:26.53
and she was just
kind of, "Woe it's me,
00:24:26.56\00:24:28.90
Poor Pitiful Pearl,"
00:24:28.93\00:24:31.43
that's what I'd always
call her when she get like that.
00:24:31.47\00:24:33.23
I'd say, "You're doing a
Poor Pitiful Pearl party."
00:24:33.27\00:24:35.87
And I told her, I said
00:24:35.90\00:24:38.84
what you need to do is
get involved helping someone.
00:24:38.87\00:24:43.45
What she did was went down
00:24:43.48\00:24:45.41
and she
volunteered at a ministry,
00:24:45.45\00:24:48.42
helping to feed the
poor, helping to, you know,
00:24:48.45\00:24:51.75
do clothing drives but I mean,
00:24:51.79\00:24:53.15
she served in a
line feeding them,
00:24:53.19\00:24:55.56
it didn't take
any time whatsoever
00:24:55.59\00:24:58.73
to have that
depression that had her
00:24:58.76\00:25:01.10
so oppressed for
months, was just totally gone.
00:25:01.13\00:25:05.53
Because she was reaching
out to help somebody else.
00:25:05.57\00:25:07.84
Reaching outside her,
that's a perfect example,
00:25:07.87\00:25:09.87
Shelly, of what
we're talking about.
00:25:09.90\00:25:11.34
And even if
you're not depressed,
00:25:11.37\00:25:12.94
see we're talking about
keys to optimal mental health
00:25:12.97\00:25:15.58
and so I want the listeners
and those who are watching
00:25:15.61\00:25:18.11
and listening to
be able to realize,
00:25:18.15\00:25:19.48
you don't have to have a
diagnosis with depression
00:25:19.51\00:25:22.92
or anxiety to
apply these principles.
00:25:22.95\00:25:25.25
Amen.
00:25:25.29\00:25:26.62
Because some of us
might not have those diagnoses
00:25:26.65\00:25:28.32
but we do not have,
we're not experiencing
00:25:28.36\00:25:30.59
that optimal mental health.
00:25:30.63\00:25:32.79
Amen.
00:25:32.83\00:25:34.36
Yeah. It's so for us. It is.
00:25:34.40\00:25:36.26
So these things
are good for all of us
00:25:36.30\00:25:38.23
whether or not we're depressed.
00:25:38.27\00:25:39.60
Altruism, I mentioned that,
00:25:39.63\00:25:40.97
listen to some
things they've found.
00:25:41.00\00:25:42.34
People who
volunteer tend to experience
00:25:42.37\00:25:45.01
fewer aches and
pains, less depression.
00:25:45.04\00:25:47.84
Some studies suggest
that giving to others
00:25:47.88\00:25:50.11
makes people feel happier
00:25:50.15\00:25:51.98
than when they spend
some money on themselves.
00:25:52.01\00:25:53.78
Yes. That's amazing to me.
00:25:53.82\00:25:56.72
Blessed to give than to receive.
00:25:56.75\00:25:58.65
Than to receive.
00:25:58.69\00:26:00.02
You see how these things,
00:26:00.06\00:26:01.39
the Bible just has
given this to us years ago
00:26:01.42\00:26:04.33
and science is
just now showing this.
00:26:04.36\00:26:07.23
And we have a term within
our Seventh-day Adventist Church
00:26:07.26\00:26:12.43
called systematic benevolence.
00:26:12.47\00:26:14.77
When I started to
understand and read the research
00:26:14.80\00:26:17.37
on giving, I said,
"Lord, that's why you came up
00:26:17.41\00:26:20.38
with this whole plan of giving."
00:26:20.41\00:26:21.74
It's started
during the time of Israel.
00:26:21.78\00:26:23.11
It did. You know?
00:26:23.14\00:26:24.48
It's not just to
sustain His cause
00:26:24.51\00:26:27.18
but it's also for
our own mental health.
00:26:27.22\00:26:30.25
My husband and I are
reading through a book right now
00:26:30.29\00:26:32.22
and the author is
talking about the fact
00:26:32.25\00:26:34.19
that when we give,
00:26:34.22\00:26:36.52
God has given people
things, but when we give,
00:26:36.56\00:26:39.09
it actually
removes the selfishness
00:26:39.13\00:26:41.20
and the covetousness
from our own hearts.
00:26:41.23\00:26:43.03
That's very good.
00:26:43.06\00:26:44.40
So the whole
system of giving God
00:26:44.43\00:26:46.20
has given to us
to help us mentally.
00:26:46.23\00:26:48.60
That's beautiful. Isn't it?
00:26:48.64\00:26:50.61
And so when we give now
00:26:50.64\00:26:51.97
we don't have to
give of a grudging spirit.
00:26:52.01\00:26:54.04
Yeah.
00:26:54.08\00:26:55.54
You know, recap, I can't believe
00:26:55.58\00:26:57.05
how quickly this went by.
00:26:57.08\00:26:58.41
Recap those four
points for us real quickly.
00:26:58.45\00:26:59.78
Okay.
00:26:59.81\00:27:01.15
We talked about,
we're not doing it
00:27:01.18\00:27:02.52
in the same order
but we talked about
00:27:02.55\00:27:03.89
aiming for true happiness,
taking care of our bodies...
00:27:03.92\00:27:06.52
Right.
00:27:06.55\00:27:07.89
Monitoring our thoughts,
moving away from the past
00:27:07.92\00:27:10.96
and then we
slipped in the fifth one
00:27:10.99\00:27:12.43
and that's the
importance of finding time
00:27:12.46\00:27:14.46
to engage in
activities to help others.
00:27:14.50\00:27:16.36
That's wonderful.
00:27:16.40\00:27:17.73
Now, Magna,
we're all out of time.
00:27:17.77\00:27:19.53
We're going to
have Dr. Parks come back
00:27:19.57\00:27:21.90
and I just want to
thank you so much for...
00:27:21.94\00:27:24.71
and I should say,
Dr Parks Porterfield,
00:27:24.74\00:27:26.71
I'm accustomed to
calling you Dr Parks as well.
00:27:26.74\00:27:29.24
She's going to be coming back
00:27:29.28\00:27:30.71
and doing
another program with us.
00:27:30.75\00:27:32.91
And today you've
heard some things
00:27:32.95\00:27:35.68
that God can teach...
00:27:35.72\00:27:37.52
If you will accept it
and allow God to do this
00:27:37.55\00:27:40.19
they will help you
have optimal health.
00:27:40.22\00:27:43.96
God bless you and
join us again next time.
00:27:43.99\00:27:46.46