Participants: J. D. Quinn (Host), Gregory L. Jackson
Series Code: IAA
Program Code: IAA000410
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00:01 Many times we have the question,
00:02 how does surrender impact your marriage? 00:05 Stay with us, we'll be right back. 00:32 Welcome to "Issues and Answers." 00:34 My name is J.D. Quinn. 00:36 As I mentioned while ago 00:38 how does surrender impact your marriage? 00:41 I want to go to Matthew 19 and verses 4 and 5 00:45 and read those to you. 00:49 "Have you not read that He who made them 00:51 at the beginning made them male and female, 00:53 and said, 'For this reason 00:55 a man shall leave his father and mother 00:58 and be joined to his wife 01:00 and the two shall become one flesh?"' 01:03 That's what we're going to be sharing today with you 01:05 and I have a special guest Pastor Gregory Jackson. 01:10 I welcome you to Issues and Answers. 01:12 Thank you, thank you. Tell us a little about yourself. 01:15 Well, I'm a pastor in the Allegheny West Conference. 01:18 I've been pastor for 31 years. 01:21 I now pastor the Bethel Seventh-Day Adventist Church 01:23 in Cleveland, Ohio. 01:25 I'm married, Marilyn Jackson for 14 years. 01:29 We have five children, five grand children 01:33 and that's basically pretty much 01:36 in raising Adventist. 01:39 You know, the old story, go through Adventist education 01:42 and then go out and Lord rear as you back in. 01:45 Amen, amen. 01:47 And you know, while I hear that quite often, 01:50 but and it's like I've said many times, 01:52 thank you Jesus, 01:53 it's not a hundred yard dash. Yes. 01:55 But it's a marathon. Yes. 01:56 You know, I mean, it's wonderful 01:58 if, if you can run that hundred yard dash 02:01 and keep your eyes focus on the Lord 02:02 at all time. Yes. 02:04 But sometimes is the wiles of the evil 02:06 want to grab a hold of us now. 02:08 But we find our way back. Yes. 02:10 Thank you Jesus. 02:11 I know that you've written this book, 02:13 "How Surrender Makes Marriage Happier, 02:16 how it makes Divorce a Blessing, 02:19 and the Single Life Fulfilling. 02:22 Can you tell us kind of why you wrote this book? 02:25 What motivated this book right here? 02:28 What motivated the book was again 02:31 I wanted, I wanted people to experience 02:34 the fullness of God's power in every area 02:37 or whatever phase in life. 02:39 And in relationships 02:41 and that covers out the whole gamete. 02:44 You're either married, or you're divorced, 02:46 or you're single and I've been in all three. 02:50 So I'm speaking from experience. 02:53 Okay, I know that you've devoted 02:56 one full chapter to why marry? 02:59 It seems like, that's something, 03:02 expand on that, why marry? 03:04 Yes, okay, that seems like, 03:06 that's a question that has a given answer. 03:09 Because, people say why marry, 03:10 because you're in love. Amen. 03:13 But that's, not why and usually what we call 03:17 love is in emotion more than the real thing. 03:25 I've found something. 03:27 It's a very key principle for me. 03:30 And that is the purpose for which you marry, 03:36 will be the strength 03:37 that will hold that marriage together. 03:41 For instance, if you marry for, 03:46 what we call "Love," that fuzzy feeling, 03:49 you know that, that warm feeling you have. 03:53 They are going to be days 03:55 as you go along in that marriage, 03:57 you won't have that fuzzy feeling. 03:59 And if that's what your purpose is, 04:03 that it's going to make you feel loved, 04:07 when you don't feel loved, 04:09 you're gonna be ready to end that marriage. 04:12 And it's not a strong enough thing 04:16 to bond, to hold it. 04:18 Lot of times people marry because they say, 04:20 "Well, the clock is winding down." 04:22 Well, the clock is always winding down 04:25 and if that's the case, when it winds down 04:27 and you're ready to end it. 04:29 I mean, you can go on and on if you're trying to, 04:32 if you're trying to feel secure. 04:34 So lot of people do, they say, well I feel more secure if I-- 04:38 Well, you'll find that when you're in that marriage, 04:40 you mean, I feel more secure. 04:43 And if that is the purpose for which you get married, 04:46 then when that marriage no longer serves that purpose, 04:49 you're ready to end it. 04:50 Or even if you stay, you're not happy. 04:53 And a lot of people have never ended marriages, 04:57 but they're living two separate lives 05:00 in the same home. 05:01 That's not a marriage, 05:02 it's not a marriage in God saying, 05:04 it's not a marriage to the two of you. 05:08 There's only one purpose that is strong enough 05:12 to hold the marriage and that reason is this. 05:17 You should marry only because 05:21 you feel that's God's will for your life. Amen. 05:25 And I can get more into and I have, I do in the book. 05:27 I don't have time to get into them. 05:28 But that's my first question, 05:30 whenever I am doing marriage counseling 05:32 and it usually throw people off. 05:34 So why you don't want to get married? 05:36 Well, that's a way we love each other. 05:39 I've heard many people say that. 05:41 I've heard many people say that. 05:42 They say, I can't live without this person, 05:44 they say that and six months later 05:46 in my office saying I can't live with this person. 05:49 I said, there has to be something better than that. 05:51 And then, and you can stay off with that, 05:53 but you have to move from that 05:55 if you really want that marriage. 05:56 And that's what I encourage them to do. 05:59 I say, well, that's good, that's, 06:00 but that's not gonna be strong enough 06:02 to weather the storms that you're going to face. 06:04 If you want to weather the storms 06:06 that you're going to face and I didn't understand this 06:08 in my first marriage. 06:10 You're gonna have to, 06:11 you're gonna have to move to a higher purpose. 06:14 And that higher purpose is got to be, 06:16 because it's God's will, because 06:17 if you marry for that reason. 06:20 When things go all right, you'll go to the God 06:25 that He's impressed you and speak with Him 06:27 and surrender to Him and deal with Him 06:29 and He will give you what you need to do His will. 06:33 And the only reason that marriage will ever dissolve. 06:38 If that's the purpose for which 06:39 both of you are getting married. 06:41 It will only be because that's God's will. Amen. 06:44 And when people really deal with that, 06:50 here is where I'm on this issue now. 06:53 When you have two people that understand that 06:55 and have come together 06:57 because God has led them together. 07:01 And then they consistently surrender to God's will 07:04 throughout that marriage. 07:05 In my opinion, I feel that there will be no divorce. 07:12 The only reason divorce happens is 07:15 because of the hardness of the heart. 07:17 And we'll get into that possibly 07:19 little later, hopefully. 07:22 But if we stay open to the spirit of God 07:25 and God has led us together, He'll keep us together. 07:30 And so if we both do that and that's what 07:33 my wife and I have come to, I told her, 07:36 when we were courting, 07:39 I said, even when we first start I told her, 07:42 "That I'm looking for a woman 07:43 who loves God more than she love me." Amen. 07:47 And I know that doesn't sound 07:49 as romantic as we like for it to. 07:51 And it's not as traditional, 07:52 it's not the traditional thinking, 07:53 but I totally agree with you. 07:55 Yes, and as you measure in it 07:57 and there is a-- You can even look at it for selfish, 08:00 because I know this. 08:02 If you love God more than you love me. 08:05 You're going to love me the way I need to be loved. 08:10 If you love me more than you love God, 08:12 then you're gonna use me like a junky use his drugs. 08:15 I need for you to make me happy. 08:18 I need for you to make me secure, 08:20 and you're gonna wear me out. 08:22 And that's what is happening in a lot of marriages. 08:23 I know it sounds good when they says, 08:26 you are the sunshine of my life. 08:28 Well, I told you, if I'm your sunshine, 08:30 you're gonna have many dark days. 08:32 And that's true with anybody. 08:33 I don't care how good they are, 08:35 they're human beings. Amen. 08:36 They are faulty human beings with needs and personalities 08:40 that are different from our own. 08:41 And even when you're not trying to do 08:43 what's wrong, even if you're being the best you can, 08:45 because you're different from that person. 08:49 There are gonna be things that you conflict on 08:50 for as little simple things in mind--, 08:52 you know, we've got into them, 08:54 there are some big ones over. 08:56 I want the window up, but I want it down. 08:58 I want the covers on and I want them off. 09:01 You know, I want the air conditioner on, 09:03 and I want it off, I mean. 09:04 And those things can grow into 09:06 and if you don't let, 09:07 if you don't let God deal with you. 09:10 So it needs more than just your love for me. 09:16 It has to be a higher source, 09:18 a higher part, a higher kind of love. Amen. 09:20 And only God can give it. 09:21 And one thing that I've, that I've counsel on, 09:27 pastor, is that, 09:30 is that the foundation has to be secure, 09:32 because if you had truly 09:34 are building your foundation on that rock. Yes. 09:37 Then you can add other rooms. Yes. 09:39 Without having to worry constantly about going, 09:44 dissolving underneath your feet. Yes. 09:47 And then just going out into the ocean. Yes. 09:49 So, is that foundation that is and you're exactly right. 09:53 I mean, I love the way that you're putting this. 09:56 Yes. Amen. 09:58 And so that's something that, 10:00 you know, it really, it really meant a lot to me, 10:03 really means a lot to me and it has, 10:05 it has more impact on the marriage. 10:08 You know, and let me read this to you. 10:11 I mean, I really appreciate your book here. 10:14 "How Surrender Makes Marriage Happier, 10:16 Divorce a f Blessing, the Single Life Fulfilling." 10:19 Let me read this right here 10:20 'cause this kind of show our audience, 10:23 kind of some of your style. 10:25 When we stop trying to find love, 10:28 security, significance, 10:30 and fulfillment in another person 10:33 and start seeking to know and surrender fully 10:35 to God's will for our lives. 10:38 We will begin to experience the truth 10:39 in Psalms 37:4 and 5, which says, 10:43 "Delight thyself also in the Lord, 10:45 and He shall give the desires of your heart. 10:49 Commit your way unto the Lord, trust in Him, 10:52 and He shall bring it to pass. 10:55 This is the sure result of daily surrender 10:57 to God's purpose for marriage." 10:59 Yes, yes, and that something that, 11:02 you know, it's hard for us to come to-- 11:06 It sounds good to us, but we say, I don't know, 11:10 if that can truly work in--it does 11:14 and I want to get into that, but there's something 11:19 that I like to get into before that. 11:21 And that, you know, because in this marriage thing, 11:26 we dealt what's here. 11:28 The next thing I say, you have to why marry? 11:32 I dealt with, how do you become one? Amen. 11:37 Because again marriage 11:39 is a process of God making those two individuals one. 11:45 And in today's world, 11:48 it has become very, very complicated 11:50 because this word of submitting and, 11:53 you know, is involved in this oneness thing. 11:56 I mean, if we're gonna become one, 11:58 how does that happen? 11:59 Do I have to give up being me for you to run the show? 12:04 Or and, you know, then it's a battle with that. 12:08 So it's very important of how we go about that process 12:13 and God has the way of becoming one. 12:15 And I, in the book used 12:17 mathematical examples to do it. 12:20 So I just want to hit that real quick. Yes. 12:24 You know, there are mathematical examples 12:29 that I used to talk about oneness. 12:33 I used the addition, subtraction, and division 12:39 to display the way we go about it 12:42 and they are the wrong ways. 12:44 One is the way of addition, which sounds very romantic, 12:48 its addition is bringing two incomplete numbers 12:55 to form the whole number one. 12:57 As for example, one-half and one-half, 13:01 neither are complete in order o for them to be complete, 13:05 you have to join them with the other. 13:06 And, you know, and there was, 13:08 there was, I think, it's J. McGuire 13:11 that has a very popular line where he say, 13:14 you complete me, and we love that, 13:17 we love that, it's so romantic. 13:19 It fits us and hits 13:20 and specially women hit to the heart, you know. 13:25 But it's not a good, 13:26 it's not a good way because it, 13:29 it has three problems for me. It has the wrong source. 13:35 It depends on a wrong source to meet their needs. 13:38 It also has the wrong purpose for marriage 13:42 and I cover the right purpose. 13:44 Again the purpose of marriage 13:46 is to develop the image of God in us. 13:50 That's God's purpose. 13:52 And as we surrender to God, 13:53 then we surrender to that purpose. 13:55 And I don't have time to cover that fully, 13:57 but it depends on the wrong source 14:01 to meet their need, because it's human. 14:04 It depend, it has the wrong purpose for marriage 14:06 and that's why the marriage is on shaky ground, 14:09 plus it has the wrong kind of love, 14:11 it raise the wrong kind which is self centered. 14:14 I need you to complete me, 14:16 therefore I'm going to use you to meet my needs 14:21 and it has become user friendly, 14:23 what I call it a user friendly marriage. 14:25 I use you and listen you use me, 14:27 I use you, you use me and it doesn't work out. 14:30 You know, and many marriages are suffering, 14:34 because there are two incompletes I can't-- 14:36 And as you see people that kill other people. 14:40 I can't live without you. I love you too much. 14:42 Well, that's the kind of love you have for me, 14:45 don't love me, please. 14:47 What really be is, is you love yourself too much, 14:50 to see them happy without you. 14:52 And you've been using them for your happiness 14:54 and you can't make it anymore without them, 14:56 so you'll kill him. 14:57 That's not good and it's miserable and even the best. 15:01 Now there are some of us that have married like that 15:04 and because we have similar personalities, 15:06 we can find a degree of happiness. 15:08 But never can we find the joy, the fullness of the joy, 15:13 where the Lord describes, when the Lord is my shepherd 15:16 I shall not want. Amen. 15:18 I shall not want. 15:19 When we understand that because when our mates 15:22 aren't meeting our needs, 15:24 we note it they are not the source 15:25 and we can go to the source, 15:27 receive that and love them in spite of, 15:31 you know, the fact that they're not meeting that need. 15:33 Because there's no human being on the face of this earth 15:36 that's going to be so perfect 15:37 that they meet all of our needs, 15:39 all of us are needy. 15:40 That means when I marry a person, 15:42 they have their issues, I have mine 15:45 and they can't be my all in all 15:46 and I can't be their all in all. Amen. 15:48 And there are places we're gonna meet in the middle 15:50 and really, but there are other place 15:51 where we're gonna rub. 15:53 And if we don't have a buffet, 15:55 if we don't have somewhere else to go, 15:57 to receive what we need. 15:59 Like when my wife and I have fallen, 16:01 and I have a good wife. 16:03 You know, I had a, 16:04 you know, I don't want to fault the wife 16:06 I had before, you know. 16:08 I didn't fully understand what I understand now. 16:10 We were two individuals, that love the Lord at a time 16:14 and try to do what's right, 16:15 but we were depending on the wrong source 16:18 for happiness, 16:19 depending on the wrong power to make it happen 16:22 and relating with the wrong kind of love. 16:24 And it went to the--and never and 16:28 we didn't have a kind of personalities 16:30 that were so meshed, 16:32 that we could survive like that. 16:33 Unlike, I say, even the ones that do survive, 16:35 they don't reach the pinnacle of what God wants for them, 16:38 because we limit. So that one doesn't work. 16:41 Then there is subtraction measure 16:43 which is more popular one. 16:44 Which is subjecting a lesser number to a more, 16:49 a higher number two minus one, 16:53 one is more powerful than the other. 16:54 And they're both together not for a need to feel loved. 17:00 They're both together 17:02 for a need to feel powerful and in control. 17:05 Even though the one that's not they're submitting, 17:08 because they feel so powerless 17:09 that they have to get somebody 17:10 more powerful than themselves. 17:11 And through them and submitting to them, 17:13 they can receive their power. 17:15 Both for user friendly as same thing 17:18 is just that is more degrading, 17:20 because and that's the more traditional. 17:22 I'm the man of the house and, 17:25 you know, we're going to-- 17:26 And that sounds like the right way, 17:28 but the problem again is, you know, the wrong source, 17:32 the wrong purpose and the wrong kind of love. 17:36 Now then there is the-- Then there is the division 17:39 and their purpose for coming together is two equals, 17:43 you know, one divided by one equals one. 17:47 And there the issue is, 17:48 now you have to treat me like an equal. 17:50 That's more the modern kind of marriage. 17:51 You know, I'm your equal, and no longer 17:53 you're degrading to me. 17:54 I you know-- I don't want to hear that. 17:56 And so the thing that bonds them 17:59 is you make me feel equal, 18:02 you don't make me feel less than 18:04 and I'll keep you with that. 18:06 But anytime you make me feel less than, 18:08 I'm through with you or with the other one 18:11 anytime you make me feel not in control 18:14 and powerful, I'm going to. 18:16 And the other one is anytime you don't make me feel loved, 18:20 you know, and complete. 18:22 You know, I'm-- So all of them, 18:24 you know, that need is there, depending on the wrong source 18:27 because that source is gonna fail you. 18:29 I'm okay, how good a source, they even like I said, 18:31 the best marriages, you have issues when 18:34 they don't make you feel. 18:35 And if you don't really have 18:37 the right kind of relationship with God, 18:38 you just deal with it. 18:40 And you move on, because it's not as painful, 18:43 because they do meet it pretty good, 18:46 you just deal with that and move off. 18:48 But there are pains and there are scars 18:51 that haven't been healed, because you're not, 18:53 you haven't gone to the Lord. 18:54 Now, and so let me get to the one that does work 18:58 or that I feel is that reflects 19:01 what God has for us 19:02 and that's the exponential math tested, 19:05 new math, they didn't have when I was there, 19:06 so I'm glad, is up one, but I know this, 19:10 it--and without you know, 19:14 I really deal with it more in the book, 19:16 but let me just-- Some of it-- 19:17 I will let through that one is, 19:20 is not two incompletes coming together, 19:24 neither is more powerful, 19:27 you know, it's taking away from the other. 19:29 Or neither it is two equals that duplicate each other, 19:34 duplicate, duplicate. 19:37 It is two whole numbers coming together 19:44 increasing the power of both. 19:47 It is one raised to the power of two. 19:52 Where they go through life as one, 19:54 but they had the impact on life as two. Amen. 19:58 It doesn't take away from either one, 20:00 it enhances and makes the whole great up. 20:06 And it is--they depend on they know for that to happen, 20:09 they have to depend on the right source, 20:12 because to feel complete, 20:15 to feel whole, to meet their need. 20:18 Because there's two complete people, 20:20 you have to behold, you can't come to the marriage needy. 20:25 Oh, I need for you to do this 20:26 or you can't--and even being in control is needy 20:29 when you come with this subtraction measure. 20:31 Even the one that sounds equal is needy, 20:33 because I need for you to make me feel equal. 20:36 When you make me feel less than, 20:38 I can't handle that. 20:40 That's needy, you have to behold, 20:43 you have to be such that 20:44 even when your mate doesn't make you feel, 20:47 like you feel you need to be treated, 20:49 you can love them anyway. 20:51 That's because you have a source 20:54 that is meeting your needs all the time 20:58 and inspite of the fact, that 21:00 you're not being allowed to used right now to meet, 21:02 I like for you to, but if you don't, 21:04 I'm not walking around like a beggar with my cup, 21:07 please make me feel secure, 21:09 please make me feel more whole, 21:10 please make me feel powerful and control. 21:13 My God makes me feel that way. Amen. 21:15 You know, and so when you don't, 21:16 I can love you anyway. Amen. 21:19 And so you have that and then, and that's in Christ, 21:24 that's only way it's possible for that to happen. 21:27 You know, that's the only way, you have to be surrendering. 21:30 You have to be dealing with God on a regular basis, 21:32 because you cannot do that. 21:34 And my wife and I, you know, we've had our fall outs, 21:38 but because we both understand that, 21:40 we've had some and specially the first 21:42 there were some things where I walked away, 21:44 I see and it wasn't because of the something terrible, 21:46 it's just that, their personality 21:48 and my personality clash. 21:50 And I went to the kitchen 21:52 and I said, O Lord, what I've got myself into. 21:54 Am I into this thing again, what's going on, 21:57 I had a let Him deal with me. 21:59 And the Lord had to deal, let me know--discuss we had. 22:03 She went and did the same thing. 22:05 It brought us back together. 22:06 As result of those kinds of things, 22:09 our marriage bond has gotten stronger, 22:11 we've bonded even more-- 22:12 Now those kind of things that we overcome those, 22:14 those come up they had no issue. 22:16 See, so what doesn't break the marriage, 22:18 only makes it stronger. 22:20 And when we went to God, He gave me, because there, 22:23 I'll tell you, my nature, just being totally honest. 22:26 My natural nature because of the way I am, 22:29 because the way of my lifestyle, 22:31 I've dealt when I was out there. 22:35 If you make me feel 22:39 that you're going to be a hassle for me, 22:42 and you're not gonna, I'm pretty, I'm done. 22:44 I don't need you, I can move on quickly to someone 22:48 who I feel will, there's a lot of more fish in the sea. 22:51 That's mean it by nature. 22:53 God is changing that. Amen. 22:55 Because see, that's self centered. 22:57 God is making me like Him. Amen. 23:00 Relating with a love that's not self centered, 23:03 but a love that is other centered. 23:05 Not based on what you do for me lately, 23:08 but what God through me can do for you. 23:11 It is not what you give me, it's what, 23:14 it I have not come to be ministered unto, 23:16 but to minister. 23:17 And in giving I receive more joy. Amen. 23:19 Because I'm getting the love from God 23:22 and God's love is so full and complete in me, 23:26 that it just bubbles open my desire to just minister 23:29 and be a blessing to you. 23:30 You know, and if you get two people to understand that, 23:33 you got a little bit of heaven on earth. 23:35 You know, because God's love in them 23:36 is empowering them to love you like that 23:39 and even when your human frailty is come in 23:41 and they will, you know, 23:42 because even though I'm like this you better believe, 23:44 O great comes out, you know still, 23:46 but because my wife is dealing, 23:48 she can handle and move on and then the Lord checks me 23:50 and works with me on that 23:52 and that's a beautiful thing. Amen. 23:53 It's a beautiful thing. 23:54 And that's almost so, and so how we become one? 23:59 In order to become one like that, 24:01 you have to be dealing with surrender on a daily basis. 24:04 I know that, I get quite a few calls, 24:07 I'm looking for a godly man. 24:09 Can we pray for a godly man 24:11 and my counsel is I think that I'll start with yourself. 24:14 Why don't you just ask the Lord 24:15 to prepare you to be a godly wife? Yes. 24:18 Prepare you to be a scriptural wife. Yes. 24:20 The gentleman call and says, oh, I just would look, 24:22 I'm looking for a godly wife. 24:24 Why don't you ask the Lord to help prepare your heart 24:27 to be a godly husband? Yes. 24:29 And then leave it up to God to bring the two together. Yes. 24:34 You know, that's His work. Yes. 24:36 And I like that because here once again 24:39 as you're saying, you know, you put him back in charge. 24:43 Everything comes, everything continues to go back. 24:46 Put God in-charge, let Him work through you. Yes. 24:50 For His perfect will. Yes. 24:51 You know, you're also, you're also 24:55 and your book deal with 24:56 the three aspects of oneness. Yes. 24:58 Okay, exactly what are you talking about here? 25:03 Well, I'm dealing with the three aspects of oneness 25:05 because oneness includes certain things, 25:10 bonding, control, submission. 25:15 I mean, when you deal with oneness, 25:17 you're gonna deal with the bonding, 25:18 because you're coming together. 25:20 Go and deal with control, because as you're one now, 25:23 who's gonna control? 25:25 And you're gonna deal with submission. 25:29 And I'm trying to say this as quickly as possible. 25:33 Bonding is, is going in the thing 25:37 that brought you together. 25:39 Now if the a thing brought you together, 25:41 the need to be may complete, 25:42 the more they make you feel complete, 25:44 the more you bond. Amen. 25:46 The more they make you feel powerful and in control, 25:48 the more you bond. 25:49 The more you did make me feel equal, 25:51 the more you bond. 25:52 The more they make you not feel like that, 25:54 less you bond. Those don't work. 25:59 If what brought you together is God's will. 26:05 Then what's going to cause you to bond, 26:09 is submitting to God's will. 26:12 And the more you submit to God's will which is, 26:14 you know, what brought you together 26:15 so you're gonna continue to do that. 26:18 The more you're gonna bond. 26:22 Then the control, that's again, 26:24 if you use the other one to control 26:27 is more about manipulation. 26:29 I'll give you control as long as you meet my needs. 26:32 You know, and I manipulate you 26:34 and you use manipulation to get control, you know. 26:37 I fix breakfast for you, I'll dress up you know, 26:39 why are doing that? 26:41 So I can get you to do what I want. 26:43 You know, and there are people 26:44 that would--people say, "I want to buy this for you," 26:47 I said, "Why," you know, if you're doing it for me, 26:48 I don't want that. 26:50 Well, that's what I want to get for you. 26:51 Well, I thought you are doing this for me. 26:52 See you're doing that because it make you feel good. 26:55 And if you're doing it for me then here is 26:56 how I would like for you do it. 26:58 But that's what we do, you know, we say, 26:59 well, I'm a giving person, my problem is, I give too much. 27:02 What if you're giving for the right reason, 27:03 you didn't give, because it's in your heart to give. 27:06 So why is that a problem? 27:07 'cause you didn't expect anything that you gave it, 27:09 just the giving was the reward. 27:11 You gave for a certain response 27:13 that's why it has now. 27:14 So that, you know, control, 27:18 if--again I'll say with control, 27:20 but when it comes to the right method, 27:23 control is given to whoever best ministers 27:28 to the marriage hold in that area. 27:31 And you both because you're submitting to God, 27:33 you submit, you're able to submit to the other, 27:35 because God will work, I said, this one, 27:38 you know, because you're both submitting. 27:40 You know, this one has more capacity in that area, 27:43 to bless the marriage, 27:44 not them, you know. Yeah. 27:48 Well here again, we're just flat 27:50 run out of time, pastor. Okay. 27:52 I just want to thank you so much 27:54 for being here with us today. Yes. 27:56 I mean, it's obvious that you know your, 27:59 you know what we're talking about today. 28:02 And I just want to thank each one of you 28:04 for joining us at Issues and Answers. 28:07 I just ask that God be with each one of you 28:09 and bless you abundantly. |
Revised 2014-12-17