Participants: Shelley Quinn (Host), Lizzie Harrison
Series Code: IAA
Program Code: IAA000345
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00:30 Hello, I'm Shelley Quinn
00:32 and welcome again to "Issues and Answers". 00:34 You know, if you are in an abusive relationship 00:38 or if you know someone who is in abusive relationship, 00:41 we want you to stay tuned today because this is the program 00:46 where we're going to talk about 00:47 the way out of the abusive relationship. 00:52 And the scripture that came to my mind 00:55 is one of my favorites, it's from Psalm 129:4 that says, 01:00 "The Lord is righteous. 01:02 He has cut me free from the cords 01:03 of the wicked that bound me." 01:06 You know, there is a bond in galliard. 01:08 You may fell trapped by your circumstances 01:11 but God is the answer. 01:13 And God has provided people like 01:15 our guest today Liz Harrison 01:18 who are out there to be a support, 01:21 to help you find solutions for the way out. 01:25 Liz, we're so thankful that you are coming back to us today. 01:29 Now your ministry is Harrison Referral Services 01:34 and you work with abused, the victims and abusers. 01:38 Tell us a little bit about what you do. 01:40 Well, what we do is, we just offer support 01:42 and referrals to women and children 01:45 and also men that are going through domestic violence 01:47 or displaced due to the abuse. 01:50 We just help supply toiletries 01:53 and we help with our referral services to shelters. 01:56 We also help with toiletries, 01:58 food and clothing and spiritual counseling. 02:01 Now, you know, my husband had been counseling 02:04 or actually praying with a woman 02:06 for quite some time who was counseling 02:08 with a woman who is in abuse. 02:10 And he referred her to you in St. Louis. 02:12 Yes, that's correct. 02:13 And he said, man, that Liz gets things done. 02:17 She took care of things in a hurry. 02:19 But the encouragement about that-- 02:21 I know your hearts dream is to have a sinner--shelter. 02:26 Yes, that's correct, yes. 02:27 But right now Harrison Referral Services out 02:32 in St. Louis, Missouri, you're taking advantage, 02:35 you were an abused spouse and from your own experience 02:41 you learned where there are some help 02:43 and you have come and put this ministry together 02:46 to help other women and just use 02:49 what's available to them out there. 02:51 Because sometimes when someone is going through this 02:53 whether it's man or woman they don't know where to turn. 02:56 But let's talk about what kinds of support 03:01 and solutions there are because trust me 03:05 as vast is our viewing and listening audience 03:09 you're gonna be ministering to someone today 03:11 whose is in that situation. 03:13 What types of solutions are available to people 03:16 who are trapped? 03:18 Well, I would suggest to let them know 03:20 that there are different organizations out there 03:22 that's available including Harrison Referral Services 03:25 that help assist with domestic violence. 03:27 They can get support and referrals 03:30 by calling hotline numbers. 03:32 Let them know what their situation is and-- 03:35 And what are the hotline numbers? 03:36 I mean, how-- what if somebody saying, 03:38 what hotline? 03:39 How do they go about in the very beginning? 03:41 Let's say that I'm being abused 03:43 and I've been cut off and, I'm in a very controlled situation. 03:47 How do I even know where to turn first? 03:49 Do I call the police for hotline number? 03:51 What do I do to even find out the hotline number? 03:53 Well, there's many ways you can. 03:54 You can call the police and they will give you hotline numbers. 03:58 If you have access to the internet you can go online 04:01 and put in hotline numbers for domestic violence. 04:04 You can also go into phonebook. 04:06 You can actually look into phonebook 04:08 for hotline numbers as well. 04:10 There's also a 211 number that you can dial 04:13 for community services where they will hook you up-- 04:16 you know, refer you to other domestic violence shelters 04:19 and help as well. 04:20 And I'm sure that wherever people are watching 04:22 from around the world there's something somewhere 04:26 that these various organizations that exist to help and assist, 04:32 provide solutions for people in these problems. 04:34 Yes, that's correct. Okay. 04:35 Now kind of support is available? 04:39 Well, the support that's available that, you know, 04:42 when you call the hotline number 04:43 and they bring you in they help, 04:46 you know, find out what your situation is to help, 04:48 you know, you start to rebuild and to restore from there. 04:51 They will help with your children 04:52 if you're flaying domestic violence with your children. 04:55 They will bring the children 04:56 and counsel the children, counsel you. 04:59 They will help you in getting restored back in a new home. 05:02 They also help with job placement, 05:05 any type of skills that you need of that sort. 05:07 Some training? Yes. 05:08 It's wonderful. 05:09 And it should be that and I know one of your-- 05:14 the things that you do when you go out 05:15 and give conferences and seminars 05:18 is that you're trying to teach the churches 05:20 to have this kind of information on hand 05:22 and be prepared to be part of that solution 05:27 to have those numbers that they can refer them to. 05:29 So if someone doesn't want to call the police 05:31 because they are afraid that if the police got involved 05:35 that they might come out to their home 05:37 then we could recommend that they would call a church? 05:40 Yes, that's true. 05:42 We're really trying to get the church more educated 05:44 on domestic violence to be more of a support system for victims. 05:47 Because we have people that just come off the street 05:49 and walk inside your church and we've had it done 05:52 in our churches as well, they needed help 05:54 with domestic violence and the pastors were able 05:56 to call me to help the woman get into safe havens and shelters. 06:00 But we do want to make sure that we're able to help 06:03 in the church with having those--the information 06:05 on hand to help the people with domestic violence. 06:09 Yes, we want to make sure we have lot's of resources 06:11 for them, nourishments, spiritual guidance 06:14 and to transfer them to where they are at 06:16 and to a safe location so that send them back 06:19 into the abusive home. 06:20 Now suppose that we've got people probably 06:23 watching--there's all levels of violence, 06:26 there's all levels of abuse I should have said 06:29 that maybe hasn't escalated into true violence 06:32 but they have recognized some of the warning signs 06:34 and they are fearful. 06:36 What are their options if they are not calling for shelter? 06:40 If you call the hotlines or if you go to someone-- 06:44 what are the options-- who can we turn to for help 06:48 if we might say, you know, I'm not being physical abused 06:53 but the verbal abuse, the mental abuse 06:56 is getting really bad and I recognize it 06:58 and I know it's not healthy for me or my children. 07:01 Where do they turn? 07:03 Well, they have a family counseling that's available 07:05 out where you can call the counselor 07:08 if you're not really trying to get into shelter or anything. 07:10 We do have services where you can get referrals 07:14 and help for counseling for you and the children. 07:16 Just to kind of see where you're at 07:17 and what you want to do in a situation that you're in. 07:23 They will help you recognize something's 07:26 that you might not see in a relationship 07:29 or the marriage and then they work with to see 07:31 what they can do to help to get you move 07:33 in towards a better direction, 07:36 more healthier direction in a relationship. 07:39 There are counseling agencies that's available 07:41 for the family as well. 07:43 Liz, when you were in your marriage 07:46 your husband was first verbally abusive 07:49 then emotionally, mentally abusive to you 07:52 and it escalated to the domestic violence 07:55 where he really became physically abusive. 07:59 What steps did you take to get yourself out? 08:03 Well, to be honest with you it was so strange 08:05 because we get these South Side Journal newspapers 08:08 that they throw out every week. 08:10 They're free newspapers and one day I just happened 08:11 pickup one and I look then 08:14 and they have resource section in there 08:17 and it just say, women support. 08:19 So I just thought I'll call the number. 08:20 I didn't know it was for domestic violence. 08:22 I was just looking for sometime of help 08:23 to someone to talk to about my situation. 08:27 And when I called the number they were actually 08:29 a domestic violence support center. 08:32 I checked myself in there for counseling. 08:35 I checked my children there 08:36 and so me and my children were going together 08:38 on a weekly basis. 08:41 And they helped me and my family 08:43 to start the transaction of moving towards 08:46 a more healthier lifestyle and more healthier situation 08:49 to get out of the abusive marriage. 08:51 We really needed the counseling. 08:53 My children--I have learned so much from the counseling 08:55 and still to this day it still affects them 08:57 but they are doing pretty good. 08:59 That's wonderful. 09:01 Because I'm just thinking that they are people 09:04 maybe that our church members and we know that, you know, 09:06 this is a problem that exists far beyond. 09:10 I mean, it's not-- once you're inside 09:12 the church walls it doesn't keep that problem out, 09:14 maybe it's masked as we've discussed 09:17 before that it's something that 09:18 is always brought out to the open. 09:20 But there are people who say, 09:22 who do I turn to in the church? 09:24 What would you recommend there? 09:26 I mean, you want to just talk to anyone about this. 09:28 That's true, you just don't want to talk to anyone 09:29 because that's not healthy. 09:31 That 'cause a lot of times when you get to talk 09:34 to anyone those individuals might be close friends 09:38 or family members with the abuser 09:40 that you might not know anything about. 09:42 So it's best to take it to the pastor first 09:46 or the pastors wife or both of them together 09:48 and let them know what's going on. 09:51 And the pastor might know someone in the church 09:55 that might be able to help and assist in that area. 09:57 And the church-- the pastor will lead 09:59 and guide wherever they are able to 10:03 but they are also will connect you with someone 10:05 that's in the church that might be a more better of support 10:08 and they will work together as a team to make sure 10:11 that the situation is worked on to-- 10:14 you know, get forced to resolving it so. 10:16 You know, they can do that. 10:17 It will be somebody inside the church we're hoping that. 10:20 That's why we're trying to get the church to be 10:22 more educated on domestic violence, 10:24 to try to get someone in each church 10:27 that are educated on domestic violence 10:28 so when those issues come up the pastor 10:30 and his wife will not just alone in the situation, 10:33 they lead and guide them to someone else in the church 10:36 so that they can have support. 10:37 Let's say that someone's watching and their spouse 10:42 has real anger management issues 10:45 and they--that's the way they control. 10:49 In other words, if they get really angry, 10:52 I mean, if anything obsessive 10:54 they are just going to go fly into a rage 10:56 and that is a type of control mechanism. 11:00 So sometimes it's just better if you're not-- 11:05 would it be better and I should frame this as a question. 11:08 If I know this person is being controlling my behavior 11:11 because of rage, would it be best to say okay? 11:16 He's not really physically abusing me 11:20 or mentally abusing me, well, that's mental abuse. 11:23 Let's say, he's not physically abuse me. 11:26 Should I just try to get my spouse help 11:30 to get them into rage management? 11:33 How do you or anger management, 11:35 how do you draw the boundaries? 11:37 I guess that's what I'm trying to ask you. 11:39 You know, 'cause it recurs me that, 11:41 there's so many dysfunctional marriages out there 11:44 and there's people who probably see warning signs 11:48 but how do you best set boundaries 11:53 to where you say to your spouse be it male or female 11:57 this is not acceptable behavior. 12:01 You've got to get help for this. 12:04 What do you suggest their? 12:06 Well, I would suggest that you would speak with them 12:10 and to let them know that you love them enough 12:12 to come to them and let them know that, 12:14 that it is unacceptable behavior. 12:18 And no one shall accept domestic violence or abuse. 12:21 And we shall try to help guide them into getting the help. 12:24 It's okay to find the numbers 12:26 and call the agencies to get the support 12:28 but it's gonna be up to the abuser 12:30 him or herself to get themselves 12:33 checked into the anger management class. 12:36 We can suggest, we can open doors, 12:38 we can make phone calls but the abuser him or herself 12:41 is the one that's gonna really have to make the call, 12:43 really have to get themselves checked in. 12:45 But first of all this is like if you're drug addict 12:48 or alcoholic you have to first recognize 12:50 that you do have a problem that you're an alcoholic, 12:52 that you're a drug addict and once you can do that 12:55 then you're able to seek the help. 12:57 But you're in denial and live in a denial 13:00 that you're abusive than it won't do any good. 13:02 But we can help to suggest and to lead 13:05 and guide to help support. 13:07 We're getting them into--get them the anger management 13:09 help that they need. 13:11 You know, it just occurred to me you're not a licensed counselor. 13:14 You know, that wasn't your educational background 13:19 but you learned through experience 13:21 and experience can be-- 13:24 The best education. The best education, definitely. 13:27 One thing we know is you do learn 13:29 when you go through it. 13:31 It can be a hard lesson but you learned. 13:33 So what if someone else has gone through this 13:37 or they just have a tender spot because maybe 13:41 their brother or sister or maybe even their parent 13:44 has gone through this. 13:46 How can we as a church body or people 13:50 who are watching can we be a support to someone 13:52 who is going through this? 13:54 Yes, we can. We can be a big support to them. 13:58 We can be nourishment for them. We can be a lifeline for them. 14:03 In my opinion I think its best not to scorn 14:08 or not to say, well, you know, you should do this 14:10 or you should get out of this relationship. 14:12 I told you not to marry that that no good person. 14:13 Yes, exactly. 14:15 They don't want to hear I told you so, 14:17 is because they already know this. 14:19 They are looking for a lifeline. 14:20 It's looking for someone not to judge them, 14:22 someone just to support them. 14:24 And a lot of times they don't leave right away 14:26 but that doesn't mean that we walk out on them 14:28 and that we leave them. 14:29 We stay there to be their support. 14:31 So when they do get this strength restrain 14:32 to finally walk away and leave. 14:34 You still want to be there for them. 14:36 Because if we walk away and leave them 14:38 because they are moving the way we think 14:40 that they should or they are not reacting 14:42 as fast as we think they should. 14:43 A lot of times they will stay with the abuser 14:45 because they feel that they have no one else anyway. 14:49 And we could be a very much support just by listening, 14:54 just by prayer, just by hugging them 14:57 and supporting them and you know, 14:59 trying to actually look for help for them as well. 15:01 Just be a support system for them, not to judge them, 15:04 not to say I told you so, not to say, 15:07 you know, if you would have did 15:08 what I told you do this wouldn't have happened. 15:10 Because you know, we have to let people walk 15:13 their own road in life and even in their relationships as well. 15:16 Boy, this is such a difficult thing 15:18 because I'm sitting here, 15:19 there's so many thoughts going through my mind 15:20 if I can articulate them but. 15:23 Let's say that someone's in the situation 15:26 and I'm trying to be a support, I've to really be careful 15:29 how I support them because I could actually do something 15:32 that may give them advice 15:34 that would endanger them is that true? 15:36 Yes, we want to make sure that first we pray 15:39 and that we make sure that before we speak 15:41 we're giving the right healthy, spiritual, 15:44 safe information as possible. 15:47 We don't want to say, well, you know, 15:48 just pack up and leave, 15:49 but there's ways to pack and leave. 15:51 There's a safe way to pack up and leave 15:53 and there's a dangerous way to pack up and leave. 15:55 You want to give them healthy information to say, 15:57 you know, well, if you need to get 15:59 all your information together, 16:01 you know, you can meet me here 16:02 or I'll help you get to your next destination. 16:04 You want to make sure when you giving them advice 16:06 that is healthy advice, its safe advice, 16:09 not what you would just suggested 16:11 and you think they would do it. 16:12 It's not that easy to just walk out and leave. 16:15 You can't tell the abuser that you're leaving 16:16 because they could kill you, take your life there, 16:20 you have to plan a safe way of escape. 16:22 So before we want to talk to someone else 16:24 about getting him out of there 16:26 we need to make sure we pray 16:27 and make sure that we have some good information 16:29 on how to plan a safe escape. 16:31 So basically then it would be good 16:33 if you're trying to be a support system 16:35 to someone to educate yourself. 16:37 To call the hotline yourself and say, 16:39 I've a friend or sister or brother-- 16:42 so I need to know what's the best type of advice 16:45 to give them, right. 16:46 Now let me ask you another question 16:48 because when we're talking about being a support 16:50 I know that doctors in hospitals if they suspect child abuse 16:55 they are required by law to report that. 16:58 What do you do when you're in a church 17:02 or in a situation where you really suspect 17:06 that children are being abused but you may recognize that-- 17:09 let's say in this case its the wife 17:10 that's maybe a battered wife 17:12 and she's got that battered wife syndrome 17:15 and she's not recognizing it or she's not in a mental state 17:20 to be able to take the next move, 17:23 I mean, she's so beaten down 17:26 that she doesn't know what to do. 17:28 If you suspect child abuse what should you do? 17:31 Well, I would suggest not that just go out 17:33 and just you know, just report it 17:37 without talking to the individual first. 17:39 I mean, we can do that 17:41 but then also to we have to understand 17:43 what the victim going through as well. 17:46 The mother if that's the victim-- 17:50 we don't know what's going on in the home. 17:51 We don't know how serious the abuse is. 17:55 You know, the police can come by 17:57 or the family service come by and they take off the abuser 18:00 and automatically take her life 18:01 and the children for calling someone. 18:04 And lot of times the victim might not have 18:06 known anything about the call. 18:09 So we have to make sure that we're doing that-- 18:12 that has a lot to do with health as well. 18:13 We have to make sure that we let them know 18:15 that we recognize what's going on 18:17 and to try to help them get out of it. 18:19 But we let them know that we will report it 18:22 but you have to make sure to that the abuser 18:24 is not aware of what's going on 18:26 because if you do you can actually call us. 18:29 By helping you can also hinder at the same time. 18:32 So we really have to make sure 18:34 what we're doing is safe for the individual. 18:37 And lot of times we're doing a good deed 18:40 but at the same time it can cost someone their lives. 18:42 So in your training you have been taught 18:43 that if someone really suspects child abuse 18:46 rather than just calling child protective services 18:49 that you go talk with the victim 18:52 and either the children or--endure the mother 18:55 first before you call them in. 18:58 Yes, and a lot of times 19:00 and we're not saying that that's the only way to do it 19:02 because sometimes we do just have to step in. 19:04 We do have to bypass all of that. 19:06 But if we know that there's not any abuse going on 19:08 we could kind of talk to the parent to find out. 19:12 You know, you can get around find if there's any abuse 19:14 or any thing going on in a house. 19:16 And you would know okay, I can call the hotline 19:18 and let them take care. 19:19 But if you know that there's domestic violence 19:21 and abuse going on you might want to take a different route 19:24 because the abusive can snap 19:25 and actually take the lives of the family. 19:28 It sounds so frightening. 19:30 But then the main point is for today 19:32 is that there are solutions out there. 19:35 There's plenty of government agencies, 19:37 there's church agencies, turn to a trusted friend 19:40 or mentor or some maybe even somebody at work 19:43 that you really trust. 19:45 Now we do want to emphasize again, 19:47 don't just turn to anybody and everybody-- 19:50 maybe at church somebody that could be 19:51 or in your personal circle because someone, 19:56 if they don't know want to do, 19:57 if they don't have any kind of training themselves 19:59 they may just go tell someone else to someone else 20:02 that he gets back to the abuser 20:04 and then you find yourself in a-- 20:06 Yeah, what we wan to do is-- 20:07 that's why I'm encouraging 20:09 that the pastors of all denomination of churches, 20:12 start having workshops and seminars 20:15 and educational programs on domestic violence. 20:19 So that we know the best way to go about dealing 20:21 with the situation. 20:23 And that's why I'm looking to travel more 20:26 to get around, to do more workshops 20:28 and more seminars and things of that sort. 20:31 We teach on teen dating and domestic violence 20:33 and things of that sort. 20:34 So we're really trying to get in the church 20:36 as to educate them on how to do it. 20:38 They could find someone in the church 20:39 that will love to etake on that leadership position 20:43 on domestic violence to help with that certain issues. 20:45 So we want to educate first 20:47 because you just can't just do it. 20:49 You have to be educated on the safe way 20:52 and then there's you know, unsafe way of happening. 20:56 So we want to make sure we're doing everything 20:58 the safe way and put the victim and the family 21:01 in the best interest of making sure they are safe. 21:03 You know, I can see why you said you want to start 21:05 with prayer because it takes a lot of wisdom and discernment. 21:08 But I also want to encourage anyone 21:11 who is in the situation. 21:13 If you start with prayer 21:14 and ask God to help provide a solution 21:16 'cause He will provide the way out, 21:19 that's something that He promises 21:21 and He will show you to whom 21:23 you might turn to find that kind of help. 21:26 And you know, we want to talk about support 21:29 for the abuser as well because we don't, 21:32 you know, again with the audience this size, 21:36 there maybe someone hearing you know 21:38 that you're doing things wrong 21:40 and there is support for the abuser. 21:43 We need to get them into some type of 21:46 whether it's anger management or just getting counseling, 21:49 family counseling, maybe they have got wounds 21:53 from their past that haven't been healed 21:56 and they just need to go and have good counseling, 21:58 good Christian counseling and come to the Lord. 22:01 We want to make sure that the abuser know 22:04 that we--we're not just here for the victim 22:06 we also want to help the abuser. 22:08 And if the abuser wants to be helped 22:10 there has to be another thing to. 22:11 The abuser has to want the help, 22:14 want to help, you know. 22:16 We will help the abuser get into anger management. 22:19 We will help them with counseling 22:20 and we want to make sure as a church, as a body, 22:22 and as a whole that we start the--counseling 22:25 in the house of the Lord as well as extending out 22:27 to different organizations. 22:29 We want to bond with the abuser 22:30 to let him or her know that we love you, 22:32 we are just really concerned about 22:34 how you are treating your sister or brother 22:36 that we all are the body of Christ 22:38 and that we should love one another and not harm 22:40 and to hurt one another. 22:42 And that we are not just putting a, 22:44 you know, putting our foots or I could say 22:46 our phone or net basically saying that, 22:48 you know, we don't care about you 22:50 we really care about the victim. 22:51 We do care about the abuser as well. 22:54 You know, we want to give them the help and you know, 22:56 its--it's a lot of men and women or victims of abuse 23:01 and they are abusers themselves. 23:02 They have gotten counseling in anger management 23:05 and come to terms with that they aren't abuse 23:07 and they do need to help 23:08 and they have them changed in Christ Jesus and you know. 23:11 And I think that's-- that's the big secret there 23:14 is that some, many times any one 23:16 who is doing this just doesn't have a personal relationship 23:20 with the Lord Jesus Christ. 23:21 Yes, you have to have a personal relationship. 23:22 They haven't surrender control to Him yet. 23:26 And they don't know that you know that-- 23:29 that's such a dichotomy in this next statement 23:32 that I am going to say that there is power in surrender, 23:36 because when we surrender control 23:38 of our lives to the Lord, 23:41 He exchanges His strength for ours. 23:43 He, you know, as He said in 2 Corinthians 12:9 23:47 Jesus said "My grace is sufficient for you, 23:50 for my power is made perfect in weakness." 23:54 And He promises to make us new creations in Christ Jesus. 23:59 And that's the beauty. 24:00 And, you know, it doesn't matter 24:02 who you are or how bad it might be 24:04 and you may be in this case the one 24:06 who is the abuser but remember this. 24:11 Romans 5:8 says that, God manifested His love, 24:16 demonstrated His love in this way that 24:19 "While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." 24:22 And if he could send His Son to die for us as sinners 24:26 how much more will He do once we accepted Him as our Savior. 24:30 Yes, that is true. 24:31 So that's the greatest hope I guess 24:33 that we want to leave for the one 24:35 who is being the abuser himself 24:39 is that God is the God of new beginning. 24:42 Yes, He is. 24:43 And His mercies are new every morning. 24:46 So what is in your personal experience-- 24:49 we have just a couple of minutes left. 24:51 What's probably been the most difficult thing 24:54 that you have to deal with Harrison Referral Services 24:57 that you are working there in St. Louis? 25:00 Well we had a--to make longer story short 25:03 we had a young lady that was actually shot by her abuser. 25:07 She actually married him a couple of weeks later. 25:10 After she was shot? Yes, after she was shot. 25:12 I visited her in a hospital and to watch her go back, 25:16 she actually married him. 25:18 And to this day it's just really was hard to connect 25:22 with her from there. 25:23 It was like when she married him, 25:25 he is like she shed everybody out. 25:27 Another young lady also too she is been abused 25:30 on a daily basis and she just was release 25:33 from the hospital few weeks ago 25:35 and she is right back with abuser again 25:39 and that's the hard thing Harrison Referral Services 25:41 is just seeing the woman that you have counseled, 25:43 the woman that you supported and to watch them go back. 25:46 It doesn't mean that all of them are gonna stay out 25:50 of their abusive relationship, but the hard part is 25:52 watching them go back. 25:54 You know, you said something and all have-- 25:55 if you can tell me this in a minute. 25:57 You made a comment as we were talking 25:59 before the program 26:00 that when you left the abusive relationship 26:04 the most difficult thing you thought you fell like 26:06 you could forgive your ex-husband 26:08 but you had a difficult time for giving yourself. 26:11 Yes, first I had to forgive myself first 26:14 before I can forgive the abuser. 26:16 Because if you don't you are gonna be bitter 26:18 and I found out that it calls to be bitter 26:21 and I had to recognize through Christ 26:22 that He let me know there first I Have forgiven you already 26:26 and you have to forgive yourself 26:28 before you could forgive the abuser. 26:30 So the Lord let you know, that He had forgiven you. 26:33 It's interesting because, you know, I wouldn't think 26:35 of the victim thinking that I need to forgive myself 26:38 so you had to forgive yourself because you stayed. 26:41 Because I have stayed in abusive relationship 26:42 for so long and do it for so long. 26:44 And that you exposed your children. 26:46 Yes, exactly 26:47 And you know that's-- that's very important 26:50 because 2 Corinthians 3:18 26:53 essentially to paraphrase it says, 26:55 we become who we behold and if you allow your children 26:58 to grow up in an abusive relationship 27:00 in seeing this guess what? 27:02 They will become abusers themselves. 27:04 Yes, that's correct. 27:05 That's what happens so often not at all-- 27:07 I mean we can't say that's for certain, 27:08 but that's they will either become a victim or a abuser. 27:14 Liz Harrison, thank you so much for joining us again. 27:17 We have appreciated these programs. 27:19 Thank you so much. 27:20 And I really believe that some one out there 27:24 this program has touched your heart, 27:25 you know that you even need to stand up 27:27 and be part of the solution in your church 27:30 to reach out into your community 27:32 or may be your are someone that's looking for that support. 27:35 There is support, reach out 27:36 because the Lord doesn't want you to live like this. 27:40 He wants you He is the God of all peace 27:43 and He is a God of hope. 27:44 And Romans 15:13 says that, 27:47 "He will fill you to overflowing with hope 27:50 by the power of His Holy Spirit". 27:52 Thanks for joining us. |
Revised 2014-12-17