Hello and welcome again
to "Issues and Answers."
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We are so glad that
you could be with us today.
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You know, we're
going to be talking about
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a very current topic
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and that is social
networking on the computer.
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We're gonna talk
about its impact,
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we're gonna talk
about the pitfalls.
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And when I'm talking
about social networking
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I'm talking about
things and chat rooms,
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Myspace and all of
that stuff that seems
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so foreign to
many of us older adults
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but that the
younger generations,
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I mean, this is
second nature for them.
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This is another life
if you will for them.
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And I was
thinking about this program
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and the scripture
that came to my mind
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was 1 Corinthians 15:3.
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Here's what Paul writes,
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"Do not be deceived and misled,
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bad company
corrupts good morals."
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And parents, this a
program you need to watch
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if you have teenagers,
young adults in your home
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or even those that have
gotten outside your home
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just so that you may
have to relate with them
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and may be can give
them some spiritual guidance.
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And it is my
pleasure to introduce to you
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returning for a third time,
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actually, this
is the fourth time
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you've been on 3ABN,
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third time on
"Issues and Answers"
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and this is Earnest Staats.
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And Ernest, we are so glad
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that you are back
with us. Thank you.
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And you are the IT director
which is Information Technology
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director for the
Georgia-Cumberland Academy
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in Calhoun, Georgina.
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How long have you been there?
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We've been there
nine years in the area.
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I've been at the
school for six. Okay.
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And as you said
you've got all these degrees
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and all these little
alphabets soup behind your name,
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we're not gonna go into that,
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but, you know, someone gave you
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some really good advice.
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You said that you
are a techie person,
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you know, bits and
bites and zeros and digits
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but someone gave you the advice
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don't look at this as
just technology but what?
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But as a ministry and
that's where I've felt like
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I have a potential ministry
within the security area
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'cause this is an area where
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I would have
studied a lot. Okay.
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And I've spent a lot of time
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and that was Robert Henley
from Southeastern Conference
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first came up with the
concept and recommended it.
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Then Nancy Lamoreaux from
the division really encouraged
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and she started
asking me to go around
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and she through the
division paid for me go
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and visit other people,
start talking about security
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and family safety
and online safety for
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not only families
but for ministries,
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for churches, for organizations.
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So tell us
about, as I said someone
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so awful is--
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about some of the
social networking places
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and what they're like,
what their names are. Okay.
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Social networking is
just basically a place
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where you can go
hang your hat if you will.
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You put your picture up there.
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You pull up kind
of music you like.
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You talk about things
that happen in your daily life
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but you let other
people comment on it too.
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So then they may talk about
whatever you're talking about.
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So it's just kind of
an interactive community
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where people
talk about your life.
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And several of the big ones
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Myspace is one
of the largest one,
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is the largest one, excuse me.
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And I just
started, how long ago?
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I mean it just
came, I don't know.
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It seems like it's just
only been in the last year
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so that I've
been hearing Myspace
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and all of a sudden,
that's all you hear. Right.
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It's been out for five or
six years. Has it been, okay?
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So that I remember,
it might be before that,
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I don't want to
know their inception that
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but it is just,
it is a phenomenon
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that is really
taking the world by a storm.
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For example, they have
150,000 new users a day.
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You know, they get
over 13 million views a day
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which is twice
the number of Google.
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You know they
have 4,475 per second.
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And Google is one of the
largest, or the largest--
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It is the largest search engine.
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Search engine on the internet
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and Myspace has double the hits.
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Double. That's amazing.
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But let me ask you something,
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with all that has
been talked about,
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the safety issues and chat rooms
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and the predator's who go
online looking and for victims,
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you know, they're
trolling if you will.
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With all that's
been talked about
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and people who
are being educated,
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aren't people being
safer or more careful about
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what they put online?
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I wish that was the case.
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Some statistics from
2007 which were very alarming,
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let me just share one of them,
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96% of students
between ages 9 and 17
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have Myspace accounts. 96%?
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96, that's between ages
of 9 and 17. That's amazing.
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You're not even allowed to be
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on Myspace
unless you're 13. Huh.
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So all the wards that are 13
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and under are lying
about their age. Oh.
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And that's something
you find very common.
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I've gone to
Adventist schools before
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and I've asked the
kids, fifth graders,
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how many of you
have a Myspace account?
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More than half
have raised their hands.
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And this is fifth grade?
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Fifth graders,
they're not 13. Uh-huh.
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So, and you know
I have sixth graders
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and I've talked to them
and they're not old enough.
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Some of them are not old enough
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to have the Myspace
and they already have them.
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And I even talked
down to third graders,
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I know one third grader that has
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a Myspace account is
very active on Myspace.
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So this is someone--
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a third grader that's obviously
little mature for their age
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and they can actually come out
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and keep up with
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the activities
that are going on that.
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So if, are they being,
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they're not being
careful then is what you saying.
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Even though the
parents are warning their kids
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and they hear these things
in the news about predators,
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those putting up
information that.
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What kind of
information is dangerous
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to put on these social networks?
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Statistics of a
2007 studies showed that
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more than 50% of
the kids were online
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putting their
address, the school they go to,
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sometimes their and
I think it was about
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just under 50% were putting
their cell phone numbers.
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So this is leaving
them open to be a target
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for predator to shoot
down and literally get them.
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In one situation
I was involved with
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when I was up in one school.
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There was a young lady
there and she was over 13
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but she talked about that
she was closing the restaurant
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at night by herself,
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and she told when her
closing shift was done.
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So and she--you know
talked about the restaurant
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she worked at, she
was the only person there.
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I mean, if someone
want to rob the restaurant
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all the information they needed
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was right there
and she would have,
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I'm sure had to be
hurt in the process.
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You know, I sent off
hey, you need to get this off,
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you need to get
this off your account,
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this is why I explained to her.
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You know, you
didn't even think about it.
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Yes, so there are
just things that to them
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because they don't
have those devious minds,
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they are not thinking
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that the
information they're putting up,
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they just think
these are facts in my life.
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And youth have the
idea that they're immortal.
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You know, young kids,
usually when you get older,
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you try to mature out of that.
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Some of us don't
mature out as fast as others
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but at the same time as
you are going through that,
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teenagers
especially don't have that idea
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that anything bad
will really happen to them.
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Yeah, right.
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So what kind of an
impact, a social impact
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besides this predator
and the dangers of that,
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what kind of the
social impact does it have
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being on this online networking
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and the social
chat rooms and things?
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Some of the social impacts
some of its very positive.
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There are some people who just,
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they're really
soft-spoken, their mild.
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They don't feel like
they can speak out in class
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and the social network
gives them a place to do that.
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You know, it
allows them to communicate
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and share their fears
and share their things
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which sometimes that's good,
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sometimes that makes
them little more vulnerable.
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But at the same
time it does allow them
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and it can enhance
communication skills
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with direction
and guidance. Okay.
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I always say with
direction and guidance
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because parents seem
to be a part of that,
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because if they're not,
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their English is
not getting any better,
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their grammar is
not getting any better.
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You know, but if
you there to help them--
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I think text messaging is
gonna ruin our English grammar
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because I noticed now that
people are beginning to email
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and that text message lingo
and you think oh, please. Right.
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And it originally started
with a bunch of geek cads
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as I call them and
it was called leetspeak,
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you know, which was
another way of saying geekspeak.
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And you know there's
whole another language
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and that's kind of--
in cell phones you write
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have changed a little
bit and it's changing our,
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you know, the
Webster's dictionary,
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is kind of a living document
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because it is
constantly changing. Oh, yes.
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Google is now a
verb and a noun. Yeah.
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So when you said
I googled something,
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you know, everyone knows,
you may not actually used Google
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but you researched it. Right.
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So and that's way it
is changing our society.
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So let's be really specific,
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what are some of
the risky behaviors
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that people are doing online
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in these social
networking scenarios?
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30% of the kids
that our poll found that
00:09:07.72\00:09:09.79
they were talking to
people they did not know
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who they were
through social networking.
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And I mean, there is Myspace,
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there's Friendster, there is--
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I mean,
Livewire, there is I mean,
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Live Spaces, Cyworld,
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I mean, they go
on and on and on.
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There's a whole
bunch of amount there.
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But as these people are doing,
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now they're talking
with people they don't know.
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They're posting pictures,
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sometimes,
inappropriate pictures,
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you know, if you go
like we've talked before
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you try buying
something off the wreck,
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you look at it say,
maybe that's a little bit edgy,
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you know, maybe I wouldn't
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but you put that same picture
online then all of a sudden,
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it takes a different feel to it.
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And I want to just backup here
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because a while
ago you said that
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you told a little
girl to take this off
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about the restaurant closing,
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but even though you deleted,
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anything that's
been on the internet,
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once it's on the internet,
even though, you've deleted it,
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it is still archived somewhere
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where someone could go
pick up the information,
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isn't that true?
00:10:01.22\00:10:02.51
Most of it yes and it's through
00:10:02.54\00:10:03.72
what's called
World Wide Web archive
00:10:03.75\00:10:05.28
and you can ask it,
but so once you post it,
00:10:05.31\00:10:07.12
you don't know
who's downloaded it. Yeah.
00:10:07.15\00:10:09.06
And they put it
on their computer,
00:10:09.09\00:10:10.42
on their jump drive
00:10:10.45\00:10:11.50
so it can be
reposted somewhere else,
00:10:11.53\00:10:13.30
it can be shared
00:10:13.33\00:10:14.48
and the department of
Office of Juvenile Justice,
00:10:14.51\00:10:17.89
they have found that this
is a highly motivated group
00:10:17.92\00:10:20.42
the people who are
into cyber predators
00:10:20.45\00:10:22.51
so they share this information
with each other. Yes.
00:10:22.54\00:10:24.83
And they share the searches,
they share the contacts,
00:10:24.86\00:10:26.85
so that's something
you need to realize that.
00:10:26.88\00:10:28.96
But then with young people
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they're posting
their cell phones,
00:10:30.28\00:10:31.44
they're putting their school,
00:10:31.47\00:10:32.63
you know, events and
addresses and names, you know.
00:10:32.66\00:10:35.47
I went online and I posted that
00:10:35.50\00:10:36.77
I graduated from Campion Academy
00:10:36.80\00:10:38.67
and I was able to
find several people
00:10:38.70\00:10:40.15
who I haven't seen for years.
00:10:40.18\00:10:41.65
And we talked and
it was a great time.
00:10:41.68\00:10:43.78
You know, gives me
excuse to save money
00:10:43.81\00:10:45.32
not go back to a reunion,
00:10:45.35\00:10:46.53
at least that's
what I tell my wife.
00:10:46.56\00:10:48.37
But you know there
are so many aspects to it
00:10:48.40\00:10:51.62
but at the same time
there is also some downsides
00:10:51.65\00:10:54.09
because if there are kids
00:10:54.12\00:10:55.59
and they are
posting their schools
00:10:55.62\00:10:56.67
then the person or
person who wanted to harm them
00:10:56.70\00:10:59.62
or do something
that was inappropriate,
00:10:59.65\00:11:01.13
it's a lot, you've given him
00:11:01.16\00:11:02.19
a lot more
information to do that. Okay.
00:11:02.22\00:11:04.00
So what can parents do
00:11:04.03\00:11:05.65
if they find out
that their children
00:11:05.68\00:11:08.33
are participating
in risky behavior?
00:11:08.36\00:11:12.07
If they've been maybe posting
some personal information,
00:11:12.10\00:11:14.99
talking to strangers
which is always risky behavior,
00:11:15.02\00:11:18.30
not just in person
00:11:18.33\00:11:19.75
but it's
particularly on the internet,
00:11:19.78\00:11:22.01
it is very risky.
00:11:22.04\00:11:25.60
One of the things as a
parent as we've mentioned before
00:11:25.63\00:11:28.30
when I have been on your shows
00:11:28.33\00:11:29.36
we got to open the
lines of communication.
00:11:29.39\00:11:31.45
Its imperative that
as parents and children,
00:11:31.48\00:11:33.57
we start talking and making
sure that they understand that--
00:11:33.60\00:11:36.91
its because we love them,
because we care about them,
00:11:36.94\00:11:39.17
because we want
to see them grow old
00:11:39.20\00:11:42.02
and not have an early grave
00:11:42.05\00:11:43.56
and not have something
horrible happen to them
00:11:43.59\00:11:45.03
or just have unfortunate event.
00:11:45.06\00:11:47.91
By once we start communication,
then when you start
00:11:47.94\00:11:49.93
being a part of
the Myspace world
00:11:49.96\00:11:52.02
we need to-- I suggest well,
00:11:52.05\00:11:53.20
parents to have
a Myspace account
00:11:53.23\00:11:55.26
and link to your child's account
00:11:55.29\00:11:57.55
and kind of see what
the information is there,
00:11:57.58\00:11:59.24
several vendors out
there, on safespacers
00:11:59.27\00:12:02.36
and there's
other ones out there,
00:12:02.39\00:12:03.57
if you do a search on Google,
00:12:03.60\00:12:04.86
you can search
for Myspace tracking.
00:12:04.89\00:12:06.93
And there's companies out there
00:12:06.96\00:12:07.99
that will email
you and give you alerts
00:12:08.02\00:12:09.80
if you kid got
something on there
00:12:09.83\00:12:10.86
that might be
inappropriate. Huh.
00:12:10.89\00:12:12.95
And there are
some of the companies
00:12:12.98\00:12:14.01
who even go so far as to
comment back to your child
00:12:14.04\00:12:17.17
and say, hey, I saw
those on your Myspace,
00:12:17.20\00:12:19.07
this doesn't look good
but it's not your parent
00:12:19.10\00:12:20.89
than telling the
child, hey, take this off.
00:12:20.92\00:12:23.69
So there are some companies
that's a community based thing.
00:12:23.72\00:12:26.95
How does a parent find
those type of companies?
00:12:26.98\00:12:29.72
If you go to Google,
00:12:29.75\00:12:30.78
I mean, there's
ones called safespacers,
00:12:30.81\00:12:33.71
and you can go to Google
and type Myspace tracking.
00:12:33.74\00:12:36.74
Myspace
tracking. Myspace tracking.
00:12:36.77\00:12:39.51
And then there
will be able to see
00:12:39.54\00:12:40.57
there are several different
companies that are out there,
00:12:40.60\00:12:41.89
and there's new ones
coming out all the time. Okay.
00:12:41.92\00:12:43.74
That will help the
parents understand,
00:12:43.77\00:12:45.74
okay, maybe, if they don't
feel comfortable to technology,
00:12:45.77\00:12:48.01
here's something that
can help them. Okay, okay.
00:12:48.04\00:12:50.38
Now what about downloading?
What do you recommend?
00:12:50.41\00:12:55.88
Not to? Okay, why?
00:12:55.91\00:12:57.63
'Cause that is the
only thing is downloading.
00:12:57.66\00:13:01.24
Because and I've
seen it done with
00:13:01.27\00:13:03.20
even religious organizations.
00:13:03.23\00:13:04.80
They say while
we're doing this program
00:13:04.83\00:13:06.02
for the Lord, so it's okay.
00:13:06.05\00:13:08.20
But if you have it
paid for the legal rights,
00:13:08.23\00:13:10.22
it's still illegal. Okay.
00:13:10.25\00:13:11.68
And you're
still costing someone.
00:13:11.71\00:13:13.71
A Christian artist
gets downloaded illegally
00:13:13.74\00:13:15.62
as much as a secular artist
00:13:15.65\00:13:17.54
which is unfortunate state
00:13:17.57\00:13:18.85
of Christian affairs
in my opinion. Yes, it is.
00:13:18.88\00:13:21.30
And we are seeing more
and more of that when--
00:13:21.33\00:13:24.14
with those
downloads, come viruses,
00:13:24.17\00:13:26.07
come worms, come
inappropriate content,
00:13:26.10\00:13:28.46
pictures and other things.
00:13:28.49\00:13:30.08
And they're doing this
specifically trying to target
00:13:30.11\00:13:33.20
and get their hooks
into the young people. Okay.
00:13:33.23\00:13:35.56
Now beside the, I mean,
00:13:35.59\00:13:38.08
there are internet
filters that parents can put on,
00:13:38.11\00:13:41.35
let's talk about
that for a moment.
00:13:41.38\00:13:44.02
When you put an
internet filter on,
00:13:44.05\00:13:46.01
that's not a cure all.
00:13:46.04\00:13:48.31
There is hundreds of
ways to bypass filters.
00:13:48.34\00:13:51.87
And if you go on my website,
00:13:51.90\00:13:53.12
it's not its not rocket science
and its not new to the kids.
00:13:53.15\00:13:55.46
Okay, now I believe last program
00:13:55.49\00:13:58.17
we've talked about your website
00:13:58.20\00:13:59.35
but I like to get that again
00:13:59.38\00:14:01.12
and his website is es-es.net,
00:14:01.15\00:14:08.12
es-es.net
00:14:08.15\00:14:11.19
and if you go to Ernest website,
00:14:11.22\00:14:14.52
you can get some information
00:14:14.55\00:14:17.09
that he's got
even a pictorial thing
00:14:17.12\00:14:19.78
that will take you
through and walk you through
00:14:19.81\00:14:22.53
and learn about
these things and find,
00:14:22.56\00:14:25.48
I mean, I encourage all parents
00:14:25.51\00:14:27.36
who know that your
kids are using the internet.
00:14:27.39\00:14:29.36
If you have kids, they
are, whether you know or do not.
00:14:29.39\00:14:31.93
So I encourage you to go there
00:14:31.96\00:14:33.93
and look for that
free information. Okay, so.
00:14:33.96\00:14:37.91
With that-- like you've said
00:14:37.94\00:14:39.36
I've got narrative powerpoints
00:14:39.39\00:14:40.52
they can sit there and
listen and watch and learn.
00:14:40.55\00:14:42.91
There's lots of
resources on there
00:14:42.94\00:14:44.60
that it can start open
the conversations for parents,
00:14:44.63\00:14:48.19
and they need to make sure
that their child understands
00:14:48.22\00:14:50.10
whatever they put on Myspace
or something is not private.
00:14:50.13\00:14:53.73
It's being used by all
the Fortune 500 companies
00:14:53.76\00:14:56.20
and job references now.
00:14:56.23\00:14:57.80
It's called the shadowresume,
00:14:57.83\00:14:59.32
it's what it's called
and it's your online life.
00:14:59.35\00:15:02.51
So if your child in
other words took spring break
00:15:02.54\00:15:07.37
let's say they are in college
and they took spring break
00:15:07.40\00:15:10.59
and they went
down to Cayman Islands
00:15:10.62\00:15:13.78
or the Bahamas or
Florida or somewhere
00:15:13.81\00:15:16.43
and did some
wild and crazy things,
00:15:16.46\00:15:18.48
just went do some
wild and crazy parties
00:15:18.51\00:15:20.35
and came back and
posted that on the internet.
00:15:20.38\00:15:22.78
What you're saying is when
they graduate from college,
00:15:22.81\00:15:26.10
the interviewer or the
company that's interviewing them
00:15:26.13\00:15:29.45
will be doing research
00:15:29.48\00:15:31.18
and looking at
that shadow resume
00:15:31.21\00:15:33.99
and that could make or break
00:15:34.02\00:15:35.84
whether or not
they get the opportunity
00:15:35.87\00:15:37.51
to have the job offer to them?
00:15:37.54\00:15:39.48
Not only that but
colleges are also now
00:15:39.51\00:15:41.70
and public universities are
even looking at Myspace profiles
00:15:41.73\00:15:44.69
and rejecting people
00:15:44.72\00:15:45.97
based upon their
online profiles. Mercy.
00:15:46.00\00:15:48.51
'Cause if they're
seeing that they're holding
00:15:48.54\00:15:49.86
illegal drugs in their hands,
00:15:49.89\00:15:51.17
they're talking
about smoking pot
00:15:51.20\00:15:52.95
or something like
that on their website
00:15:52.98\00:15:55.00
which is something that's
talked about pretty frequently.
00:15:55.03\00:15:57.32
And are drinking
or underage drinking,
00:15:57.35\00:15:59.43
lot of them will
reject them straight up
00:15:59.46\00:16:01.48
from that college or university.
00:16:01.51\00:16:03.14
So that child doesn't realize
00:16:03.17\00:16:05.07
that they think
they're being cool
00:16:05.10\00:16:07.09
and they're affecting
the rest of their life.
00:16:07.12\00:16:09.72
And that's true and there's
been case, documented cases.
00:16:09.75\00:16:12.33
There where this two
young people in the Northwest.
00:16:12.36\00:16:14.91
They were young, they
were under the age of 18,
00:16:14.94\00:16:16.96
they sent inappropriate pictures
of themselves to each other,
00:16:16.99\00:16:19.45
a boyfriend and
girlfriend type thing.
00:16:19.48\00:16:21.63
A parent found it,
they reported it to police,
00:16:21.66\00:16:23.75
both of those
children are now registered
00:16:23.78\00:16:25.51
sex offenders for
the rest of their life.
00:16:25.54\00:16:27.81
Oh, mercy, how sad.
00:16:27.84\00:16:29.20
You know, they
made a bad mistake
00:16:29.23\00:16:32.58
but that's going to go with them
00:16:32.61\00:16:33.64
and sex offender
registry goes with them
00:16:33.67\00:16:35.48
for the rest of
their life. How sad.
00:16:35.51\00:16:37.54
Now we've talked a
lot about predators
00:16:37.57\00:16:40.22
and the different
things that impact
00:16:40.25\00:16:43.04
this social networks can have
00:16:43.07\00:16:44.85
but let's talk about
this for a moment, bullying.
00:16:44.88\00:16:48.23
Because there's
a lot of bullying
00:16:48.26\00:16:50.73
that's going on the internet
00:16:50.76\00:16:52.21
and anybody can put
anything on the internet.
00:16:52.24\00:16:55.36
You know, I
remember the first time
00:16:55.39\00:16:56.74
that I went to Wikipedia
00:16:56.77\00:16:58.58
which is an encyclopedia. Right.
00:16:58.61\00:17:00.40
And I thought, oh, cool,
00:17:00.43\00:17:02.20
I was looking up this
information and I grab it,
00:17:02.23\00:17:05.18
I'd been here two or three times
00:17:05.21\00:17:06.77
before I realized that anything,
00:17:06.80\00:17:08.69
anyone can post
anything to that.
00:17:08.72\00:17:11.37
You don't know
what the accuracy is.
00:17:11.40\00:17:14.13
And a lot of times because
we find something online,
00:17:14.16\00:17:17.92
we trusting that it's accurate.
00:17:17.95\00:17:20.26
People can post
all kind of lies,
00:17:20.29\00:17:22.66
or even all
kinds of reputations.
00:17:22.69\00:17:25.08
So let's talk about
00:17:25.11\00:17:26.64
this form of bullying
that's coming up online.
00:17:26.67\00:17:30.19
It's actually
growing almost exponentially.
00:17:30.22\00:17:33.09
And it's really
alarming that's even happening
00:17:33.12\00:17:34.91
more than the cyber
predators to be honest. Really?
00:17:34.94\00:17:37.29
They're finding and its
having a greater impact.
00:17:37.32\00:17:39.10
I mean, we've
started naming of cases
00:17:39.13\00:17:40.54
warning for mob where
a young man hung himself
00:17:40.57\00:17:42.87
and, you know,
there's other ones--
00:17:42.90\00:17:44.50
different states
where people were involved
00:17:44.53\00:17:46.10
and the kids committed suicide
because what has happened.
00:17:46.13\00:17:48.71
Its people all
types will turn to these
00:17:48.74\00:17:50.28
social networking
sites or online chat rooms
00:17:50.31\00:17:52.77
where they can type and
talk to each other for a refuge
00:17:52.80\00:17:55.31
because they're having
some type of social difficulty.
00:17:55.34\00:17:57.94
Well then if they go into
this place looking for a refuge
00:17:57.97\00:18:00.80
and they're
being beat up verbally,
00:18:00.83\00:18:03.27
you know, on being
said horrible things about
00:18:03.30\00:18:05.23
then has a lot
stronger impact on them.
00:18:05.26\00:18:08.00
Well, and when you're young,
00:18:08.03\00:18:09.89
and say you're 13 years
old and have a little snit,
00:18:09.92\00:18:13.97
little argument
with your best friend
00:18:14.00\00:18:15.82
and that best
friend gets on there
00:18:15.85\00:18:17.30
and posts some kind
of a tacky lie about you,
00:18:17.33\00:18:19.84
it's very
damaging to a young psyche.
00:18:19.87\00:18:22.81
It is very much
and they're finding
00:18:22.84\00:18:24.47
that there is lot more
control trying to happen
00:18:24.50\00:18:26.38
between
boyfriend and girlfriends,
00:18:26.41\00:18:28.59
even on cell phones,
text messaging each other
00:18:28.62\00:18:31.22
through the night, wanting
to know who they are with,
00:18:31.25\00:18:34.15
wanting to know what
friends they're with,
00:18:34.18\00:18:35.32
or why aren't you with
me if they have to be home
00:18:35.35\00:18:36.99
while you're studying
00:18:37.02\00:18:38.09
as much as you
know every 10 minutes.
00:18:38.12\00:18:40.55
You know, which then the kids
are having hard time studying
00:18:40.58\00:18:42.22
'cause they're
constantly text messaging
00:18:42.25\00:18:43.82
their boyfriend or girlfriend
and going back and forth.
00:18:43.85\00:18:46.08
Well, I saw in the news recently
00:18:46.11\00:18:47.91
and I'm sure you saw this about
00:18:47.94\00:18:50.41
in England I believe that
it was they called nomophobia
00:18:50.44\00:18:53.31
or is that what they call it?
00:18:53.34\00:18:54.89
And that's where they can't
be without their cell phone
00:18:54.92\00:18:57.85
and text messaging
and I was surprised
00:18:57.88\00:19:00.35
the number of adult people
on that interview that said,
00:19:00.38\00:19:02.95
yeah, I sleep with it,
00:19:02.98\00:19:05.06
sometimes I text
all through the night.
00:19:05.09\00:19:06.67
And you are
thinking, get a life.
00:19:06.70\00:19:10.71
But it's just a phenomenon
00:19:10.74\00:19:12.14
that we don't really understand
00:19:12.17\00:19:13.98
but it's not
going to go away, is it?
00:19:14.01\00:19:16.46
I don't see,
going away and actually
00:19:16.49\00:19:17.70
one of the really
interesting statistics to me
00:19:17.73\00:19:20.17
when I focus on youth
because I work in an academy,
00:19:20.20\00:19:22.93
they have found
online internet addiction
00:19:22.96\00:19:25.18
is really strong in
two major areas in life.
00:19:25.21\00:19:28.15
The teenage realm
and the emptiness realm.
00:19:28.18\00:19:32.29
The emptiness realm,
00:19:32.32\00:19:33.57
the internet addiction
is going through the rough
00:19:33.60\00:19:35.66
and they were surprised by that.
00:19:35.69\00:19:37.18
That recent
studies that's come out
00:19:37.21\00:19:38.32
in last couple of years.
00:19:38.35\00:19:39.63
And when we say
internet addiction
00:19:39.66\00:19:40.83
we're not talking
about pornography addiction,
00:19:40.86\00:19:42.76
we're talking about
just having to be online
00:19:42.79\00:19:45.61
and be
connected and feeling like
00:19:45.64\00:19:47.27
your life is over if you're not.
00:19:47.30\00:19:49.12
And I tease my dad about
00:19:49.15\00:19:50.41
getting three different
forms in the same newscast.
00:19:50.44\00:19:52.27
I say, you heard it
twice, you don't need to hear it
00:19:52.30\00:19:53.83
three or four or five times.
00:19:53.86\00:19:55.15
You know, we joke
and tease about that.
00:19:55.18\00:19:56.84
And where with my
dad it was more TV,
00:19:56.87\00:19:59.17
with some of the other people
00:19:59.20\00:20:00.54
and actually some
people of my dad's age,
00:20:00.57\00:20:02.17
it is becoming, it's shifting
from TV now to the internet.
00:20:02.20\00:20:06.15
And they're just--
and even if they're doing
00:20:06.18\00:20:07.36
ministry stuff,
they're just constantly on.
00:20:07.39\00:20:10.65
They don't get unplug.
00:20:10.68\00:20:11.71
My wife and I
try and take a trip
00:20:11.74\00:20:13.14
at least once every year
00:20:13.17\00:20:14.45
where we got to a camp
where there's no cell phone,
00:20:14.48\00:20:16.67
there is no TV,
there is no internet. Yes.
00:20:16.70\00:20:18.85
And we do that on
purpose to detoxify. Right.
00:20:18.88\00:20:21.49
You know, just spend family time
00:20:21.52\00:20:22.66
with our little girl
and have some fun. Yeah.
00:20:22.69\00:20:24.72
It's a bit of shock for me,
00:20:24.75\00:20:26.00
I don't have to get
used to it the first day.
00:20:26.03\00:20:27.52
I have to unwind and
say, okay, no laptop. Yeah.
00:20:27.55\00:20:31.30
You know before we
get to kind of wrapping up
00:20:31.33\00:20:35.73
much of what we've discussed
00:20:35.76\00:20:37.37
the thing that I
wanted to ask you about is
00:20:37.40\00:20:40.76
kind of fail to do this.
00:20:40.79\00:20:42.23
When we were talking about
00:20:42.26\00:20:43.95
how to protect our children
from internet predators,
00:20:43.98\00:20:48.01
is it possible to
protect our children
00:20:48.04\00:20:50.21
from internet bullying?
00:20:50.24\00:20:53.86
I would like to say
yes but I don't feel like
00:20:53.89\00:20:55.69
that be accurate. Yeah.
00:20:55.72\00:20:57.78
You know, it
happens through someway,
00:20:57.81\00:20:59.55
it happens not just on internet,
00:20:59.58\00:21:00.74
it happens through cell phones,
00:21:00.77\00:21:01.88
it happens through, if you have
00:21:01.91\00:21:03.68
the lines of communication
that your child realizes
00:21:03.71\00:21:05.76
if someone is not
treating them appropriately,
00:21:05.79\00:21:07.77
they need to come to you.
00:21:07.80\00:21:09.16
Legal, they will--
00:21:09.19\00:21:10.24
if it's a kid that's
being bullied by another kid,
00:21:10.27\00:21:12.26
local law enforcement will take
that very serious. All right.
00:21:12.29\00:21:15.26
So if that's happening,
00:21:15.29\00:21:16.99
you need to have
an open communication
00:21:17.02\00:21:18.74
between you and your
child so that we can say
00:21:18.77\00:21:20.67
we need to talk about this,
00:21:20.70\00:21:21.73
we need to take
this to next level,
00:21:21.76\00:21:22.79
talk to the school, talk
to the legal if necessary,
00:21:22.82\00:21:25.51
you know, talk
to the law officers
00:21:25.54\00:21:26.85
and say they are saying these
horrible things about my child.
00:21:26.88\00:21:29.64
She is being bullied
00:21:29.67\00:21:30.99
because they take
bullying very seriously.
00:21:31.02\00:21:33.19
And part of what
happens is because what can--
00:21:33.22\00:21:35.54
your child can become a victim
00:21:35.57\00:21:37.23
but then lots of times
through their victim status
00:21:37.26\00:21:39.56
they will also
become an offender.
00:21:39.59\00:21:41.75
Because they want
to get back the people
00:21:41.78\00:21:44.89
and that's where
we are trying to teach
00:21:44.92\00:21:46.06
the same values that
we have in real life.
00:21:46.09\00:21:47.92
We want to have
in this online life
00:21:47.95\00:21:50.07
whether its internet,
cell phones, or whatever.
00:21:50.10\00:21:52.34
I think our floor director
was today telling us that
00:21:52.37\00:21:55.17
there was a case locally,
00:21:55.20\00:21:56.62
or maybe not locally
it's was on the seen in news
00:21:56.65\00:21:59.40
and various news stations
about an online bullying.
00:21:59.43\00:22:03.10
A case where somebody
posted something to rogatory
00:22:03.13\00:22:06.50
and then the
little girl's kidnapped,
00:22:06.53\00:22:09.51
the one that had
posted the remark
00:22:09.54\00:22:11.63
and actually video taped
then beating her up and all.
00:22:11.66\00:22:14.75
So this is really prevalent
00:22:14.78\00:22:17.54
and it's growing,
isn't it? It is growing.
00:22:17.57\00:22:20.05
Like I said its
growing more than--
00:22:20.08\00:22:21.60
actually-- on the
good news is that,
00:22:21.63\00:22:23.44
actually sexual solicitation
online is going down. Really?
00:22:23.47\00:22:28.22
Which is great and you know
00:22:28.25\00:22:29.89
but the aggressive
mess is going up a bit
00:22:29.92\00:22:32.47
and the online bullying
has more than compensated.
00:22:32.50\00:22:35.70
So online bullying
is starting to happen,
00:22:35.73\00:22:37.86
it's not happening more than
00:22:37.89\00:22:39.51
online
solicitation of inappropriate,
00:22:39.54\00:22:41.39
you know, action or pictures
but it is really taking off.
00:22:41.42\00:22:45.44
So in a bottom
line, if you think about,
00:22:45.47\00:22:49.26
you know, we don't think
that technology is evil. Right.
00:22:49.29\00:22:51.97
But the impact that
these media is having on us,
00:22:52.00\00:22:56.61
how do we protect or how do we--
00:22:56.64\00:23:00.32
how do we let our
children grow up in this world
00:23:04.72\00:23:10.53
and encourage
them to grow up safely?
00:23:10.56\00:23:13.90
That's a good question.
00:23:13.93\00:23:16.16
My best answer that I can
think off lots of prayer. Okay.
00:23:16.19\00:23:20.03
Making sure that your child
is grounded in a belief system,
00:23:20.06\00:23:24.64
making sure that your child
00:23:24.67\00:23:25.98
takes their belief
system with them online
00:23:26.01\00:23:29.03
so don't encourage them,
00:23:29.06\00:23:30.48
if they download
illegal Christian music,
00:23:30.51\00:23:32.62
go buy the CD and
say we're going to be,
00:23:32.65\00:23:36.20
you know, Christian about
everything we do in our lives.
00:23:36.23\00:23:39.29
We're gonna honor the
Lord in everything we do.
00:23:39.32\00:23:41.92
Make sure that they understand
00:23:41.95\00:23:42.98
that your value
system transcends
00:23:43.01\00:23:44.68
what media
meets on. That's good.
00:23:44.71\00:23:46.76
Make sure that you are involved
00:23:46.79\00:23:48.54
when you're talking and
communicating with them.
00:23:48.57\00:23:51.19
Yeah, that's good.
00:23:51.22\00:23:52.25
And as you do that, then
I think you're gonna start
00:23:52.28\00:23:54.26
opening the doors
for two way communication
00:23:54.29\00:23:55.94
and you can share and
you can then start rooting
00:23:55.97\00:23:58.60
some of these barriers
that often times come up
00:23:58.63\00:24:00.38
in the teenagers years
00:24:00.41\00:24:01.60
between the
parent and the child.
00:24:01.63\00:24:03.31
How are you
working with your daughter?
00:24:03.34\00:24:05.91
She's 4 years old and you said
00:24:05.94\00:24:07.30
she's already online going
to strawberryshortcake.com.
00:24:07.33\00:24:11.76
How do you see--
00:24:11.79\00:24:13.63
are you going to
we've already discussed
00:24:13.66\00:24:16.36
in the previous
program that you said
00:24:16.39\00:24:17.89
it's really not wise just to
say, okay, this is dangerous,
00:24:17.92\00:24:20.70
so I'm gonna unplug you from it
00:24:20.73\00:24:21.84
because the world is going
there and you even recommend
00:24:21.87\00:24:25.49
and are trying
to reach teenagers
00:24:25.52\00:24:27.61
and ministry that
we use this medium
00:24:27.64\00:24:31.02
because this is
the medium that's there
00:24:31.05\00:24:34.13
and it's not going away
00:24:34.16\00:24:35.70
and this is what this
generation is growing up on
00:24:35.73\00:24:38.22
and we really have
turned to corner. We have.
00:24:38.25\00:24:40.93
So how are you going to--
00:24:40.96\00:24:43.35
what parameters
are you gonna use
00:24:43.38\00:24:45.07
as you view your own daughter
00:24:45.10\00:24:47.40
as far as time, that's
a lot of in all of that?
00:24:47.43\00:24:51.67
Probably, I'm
gonna make sure that
00:24:51.70\00:24:52.73
we're involved in
outside activities. Okay.
00:24:52.76\00:24:55.21
That we unplug
detoxify, I enjoy rock climbing,
00:24:55.24\00:24:58.61
my wife enjoys quilting.
00:24:58.64\00:25:00.31
You know, she's playing
00:25:00.34\00:25:01.85
and learning both about
both aspects of our lives.
00:25:01.88\00:25:04.14
You know, I taught
archery at summer camp.
00:25:04.17\00:25:05.97
You know summer camps
are great thing for kids,
00:25:06.00\00:25:08.14
but I recommend a summer camp
00:25:08.17\00:25:09.34
where they're not allowed
to bring headphones. Right.
00:25:09.37\00:25:11.12
'Cause they're some out there.
00:25:11.15\00:25:12.35
They need to unplug and
see if there's a real life
00:25:12.38\00:25:14.46
and be involved in that.
00:25:14.49\00:25:16.40
We are involved with her life.
00:25:16.43\00:25:17.66
Right now, she's on the
computer, we are with her.
00:25:17.69\00:25:20.27
She's not even if it's,
00:25:20.30\00:25:21.55
you know, because
there's always internet,
00:25:21.58\00:25:22.78
she can click through
even as a four year old,
00:25:22.81\00:25:24.94
you know, she navigates Norgren
00:25:24.97\00:25:26.28
or some of these
other education sites
00:25:26.31\00:25:27.69
or some of the Christian
sites, she can do it by herself.
00:25:27.72\00:25:29.50
Yes, at four.
00:25:29.53\00:25:30.56
At four, so at the same
time, I'm not gonna just say
00:25:30.59\00:25:34.10
I know she's good I'm
gonna use it as a babysitter.
00:25:34.13\00:25:36.64
Internet can
never be a babysitter.
00:25:36.67\00:25:38.57
Nor can television, you
know, they just recently
00:25:38.60\00:25:40.56
came out with a study
00:25:40.59\00:25:41.62
after all these years
that they have been saying that
00:25:41.65\00:25:43.39
your children will be
smarter if they watch TV,
00:25:43.42\00:25:46.54
they're
learning that the more TV
00:25:46.57\00:25:47.94
you watch between
the ages of just newborn
00:25:47.97\00:25:52.50
and to I think
four and saying that
00:25:52.53\00:25:55.62
your brain loses its ability
00:25:55.65\00:25:58.57
to have that
synapts connectivity
00:25:58.60\00:26:01.34
and really
process of full thoughts.
00:26:01.37\00:26:03.20
So that's interesting.
00:26:03.23\00:26:04.74
Well, if you think
about all the images,
00:26:04.77\00:26:06.10
they are over stimulated. Yes.
00:26:06.13\00:26:08.23
For example, I basically had
00:26:08.26\00:26:09.98
a technology
workshop with my kids
00:26:10.01\00:26:11.39
and we were online
00:26:11.42\00:26:12.62
playing games,
it was a safe game,
00:26:12.65\00:26:14.28
there was no first person
shooting or anything like.
00:26:14.31\00:26:15.94
It was a race car game.
00:26:15.97\00:26:17.36
We are watching the super bowl
00:26:17.39\00:26:19.12
and we at the same
time running around with,
00:26:19.15\00:26:20.68
you know, little
kind of like Nerf guns
00:26:20.71\00:26:23.79
and shooting each
other all at the same time.
00:26:23.82\00:26:25.21
For them that was normal.
00:26:25.24\00:26:27.99
That was a normal mentality,
00:26:28.02\00:26:29.43
we're doing three or
four different things at once.
00:26:29.46\00:26:31.31
Okay, so let's
wrap this up real quick,
00:26:31.34\00:26:33.15
we got a minute.
00:26:33.18\00:26:34.34
What should parents
specifically remember to do?
00:26:34.37\00:26:37.46
You need to remember be a
part of your child's life.
00:26:37.49\00:26:39.97
You need to remember to
realize that yourself that
00:26:40.00\00:26:42.91
you don't want to become
a spiritual statistic. Okay.
00:26:42.94\00:26:44.82
So you want to make sure that
00:26:44.85\00:26:45.88
your spending
time with the word.
00:26:45.91\00:26:47.11
Make sure your child is grounded
00:26:47.14\00:26:48.57
in the same
philosophies that you are.
00:26:48.60\00:26:51.18
And just make sure that not
only is the communications open
00:26:51.21\00:26:53.90
but that the child understands
00:26:53.93\00:26:55.74
and that they need to take
on your belief system. Okay.
00:26:55.77\00:26:58.83
And limit the
time so that we can
00:26:58.86\00:27:01.47
keep the kids
busy beyond the screens
00:27:01.50\00:27:03.57
where they've got some
kind of something to do.
00:27:03.60\00:27:05.91
And talk to your children
about what they're doing
00:27:05.94\00:27:08.29
and let them know that you care
00:27:08.32\00:27:09.67
and that you love them.
00:27:09.70\00:27:11.11
And we want to thank you
00:27:11.14\00:27:12.58
so much,
Ernest, for coming back.
00:27:12.61\00:27:14.97
This has been very informative.
00:27:15.00\00:27:17.15
I know that I've
learned some things
00:27:17.18\00:27:19.04
and you kind of bringing me out.
00:27:19.07\00:27:21.31
I'm one of those
generations that--
00:27:21.34\00:27:24.19
I'm very active on the
internet and I understand that
00:27:24.22\00:27:26.35
but I certainly don't understand
the darker side of it.
00:27:26.38\00:27:29.54
So I hope that you've
learned something from this
00:27:29.57\00:27:31.76
and I hope that
you are going to--
00:27:31.79\00:27:34.45
for you that are grandparents
00:27:34.48\00:27:35.98
even I encourage you
00:27:36.01\00:27:37.79
to learn something
about the internet,
00:27:37.82\00:27:39.69
learn how to connect
with your grandchildren
00:27:39.72\00:27:44.17
and what they're doing online.
00:27:44.20\00:27:45.94
Now may the grace of
our Lord Jesus Christ,
00:27:45.97\00:27:48.11
the love of the Father
00:27:48.14\00:27:49.27
and the fellowship of
the Holy Spirit be with you.
00:27:49.30\00:27:51.88
Thank you, so much
for joining us today.
00:27:51.91\00:27:54.34