Welcome to "Issues and Answers".
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My name is J.D. Quinn.
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We have a
wonderful program today.
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I think one that
you will really enjoy.
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We are going to be talking about
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"Families in the Last Days."
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And I'm so honored to have
Dr. Howard Weems with me today.
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It's Dr. Howard
Weems Jr. It is me.
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Welcome to "Issues and Answers."
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Thank you. I'm happy to be here.
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First thing that
I'd like to do Dr. Weems
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is find out something about you.
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Tell our audience who you are?
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Where do you work?
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Who did you get-- what caught
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your interest in
"Families in the Last Days?"
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Well, first of all I
grew up in Atlanta, Georgia.
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About two-and-a-half,
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three I was from
Huntsville, Alabama.
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And there I grew up
among seven siblings.
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And I'm the only
son in the family.
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Yes, and so
Pentecostal background parents,
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you know, where our
father minister and so forth.
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So your father is
a Pentecostal pastor?
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Minister, yes. Okay, wow.
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Yes, so it's kind
of an interesting story
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how I became part of this faith.
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You know, I was
at home one Sunday,
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and a literature
evangelist came and gave
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Bible studies, you know.
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Pastor Harris
Malone, he is a pastor today.
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Amen. And he brought me in
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and interestingly I was
considering going to school,
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but was not decided on
the right one to attend.
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And he told me
about Oakwood College
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and how wonderful it was
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and I enrolled
in and was accepted.
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And from there, you
know, my ministry started,
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from there to
South Atlantic Conference
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and then
Northeastern Conference.
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And in
Northeastern I was confronted
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with all kinds of
issues in the church.
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You know, many times we
think the church is sanitized,
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no problems, but the church
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is a hospital for sick people.
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You know, sin sick souls.
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And so we have
all kinds of issues
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and people
don't understand that.
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And so being
confronted with certain issues,
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you know, and
it says pedophilia,
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divorce, family violence,
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you know child abuse
and all kinds of issues,
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you know, chemical
or substance abuse.
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I wanted to understand better,
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how to carry out my functions.
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So I went back to school,
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already I had a Master's
Degree from Andrews University
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and a B.A. from Oakwood College.
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And so I went back
and I studied psychology,
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organizational
psychology that really
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helped me to put
it in perspective.
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And two wonderful books, "Mind,
Character, and Personality"
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those two volumes, you know,
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really helped me to keep--
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And who writes that?
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Ellen G. White. Ellen G. White.
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Right. So you'd
recommend reading
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that book? Absolutely.
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And what's that name of it?
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"Mind,
Character, and Personality."
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It gives you a
psychological perspective
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of... theology so to speak.
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It brings both together.
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She talks about
hereditary tendency trace
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that we can pass on.
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The importance of eating right
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and creating the
proper environment conducive
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for rearing God centered
children and discipline.
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I mean she talks
about pretty much
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what I studied
on university level.
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Amen. Yeah.
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So now you were a
pastor, you go back and then
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you get a Ph.D. in psychology,
an organizational psychology.
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Yes. Then where
does that take you?
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That took me to Oakwood
College or Oakwood University.
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Okay. As it stands now--
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And that's where
you got your B.A.
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That's where I got
my B.A. Was kind of like
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you went back home. I
went back home to give back.
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Okay, amen. To
make a contribution
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to the school, that
was so wonderful to me.
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Amen. Yeah. They
give me my start.
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And I think that's were
you are today, is that right?
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I am, I'm there teaching.
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Many people say,
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"What are you
teaching, theology department?"
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I said no, physiology.
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And that really
takes a lot of people
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by surprise to
know that a minister
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for 17 or 18 years
is teaching psychology.
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But I do see where I can be
true to the principles of God
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in teaching,
using those two volumes
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"Mind,
Character, and Personality"
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to keep things on track.
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Another book that I really
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like that I-- that I
read, oh, I go through
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at least three or four times
a week it's the Adventist Home
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and it's also
written by Ellen G. White.
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Oh, that's a
beautiful volume also.
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I use it you know,
when I talk about children,
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discipline, you know,
rearing children and so forth.
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Beautiful book,
it keeps you focused.
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It keeps you
from straying-- Amen.
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Too far. And
it's so well written
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and it's so practical
that it's easy to understand.
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It is very practical.
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I mean a
physiologist cannot compete
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what she says in that book.
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I mean it's-- and interestingly
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she says the same
thing that many in the field,
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you know, we say,
Ericson and you know,
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and those individuals.
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They believe the religion is
important to child development.
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Yes. Now our topic here
is on Last Day Families.
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Correct. So first of all,
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we're in present day,
but we are looking forward
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to the troubled
times ahead. Right.
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And how does the trouble
that we experience today?
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How is that going to be
multiplied into the future?
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But before we go
there, we have to see
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if you have experienced.
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Do you have children?
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Oh, yes, I do. I
do, the Lord has blessed
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with two wonderful children.
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I have a boy, or male,
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he probably would like
me to say boy, and a female.
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Amen. You know,
my son is at Oakwood,
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studying theology and business.
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Amen. And my daughter
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is at Andrews
University. She's doing her
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Master's Degree in Education.
She wants to be a missionary.
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Wonderful. Teach education.
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Wonderful. And your wife?
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My wife is a nurse practitioner.
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And she has a doctorate
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also in Curriculum
Development in Education.
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So two Ph.D.'s in one family.
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This is a smart family.
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Well, I guess,
you might say that.
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Amen, I love that.
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Let's go now.
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We are talking about
the sacredness of family.
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So you think
because God ordained family
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that if we are
indeed children of God,
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then we should not
have any challenges.
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Everything should
be just on rosy street.
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Is that the way it was?
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No, incorrect, incorrect.
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God created two
sacred institutions.
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In the very beginning
the Sabbath and family,
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they both were sacred.
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The devil attacked the Sabbath
and He would continue to,
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it will be a point of
contention we're told,
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until the second
coming of Jesus Christ,
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it's a testing truth.
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So likewise the family,
you know, would be tested,
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a point of contention
and the enemy will attack
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also the family, because
it is a vehicle for salvation.
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If you have
well trained children
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in the way of God, they are
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powerful force in God's army.
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Otherwise if we have
children that are not trained
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that well
anything to God, you know,
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they become instruments
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in the hands of the
kingdom of darkness.
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And what you want to do
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is try your very best
to put good principles,
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and rear children,
and the family is designed
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to protect children
and to send them out
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as missionaries in the world.
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You know, to make
other Christian families.
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Amen. You know,
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and it perpetuates and
it goes on and on and on.
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And so we have to do our jobs.
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We have to make sure
that we don't take chances
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and I'm very passionate about
certain aspects of it because
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I've talked to
people, I've spoken to people
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who are-- one lady said to me,
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"I love my
daughter to go and spend
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the night with a friend."
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And there someone came
in and from the other room
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I was suppose and
molested her, a 10-year old.
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And when we make
unwise decisions,
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you know, for our children,
we are actually setting them up
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or programming them
for tools of the devil.
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You know, we could program
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them for heaven or hell.
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And so again I'm
using my keyword,
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we have to be
intentional and understand
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that we are in a
spiritual warfare.
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And so we just
don't help hazardly
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or casually go through,
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you know, the
motion of being a parent.
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But we have to understand
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what a true parent is and
this is sacred responsibility.
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Amen. And I'm assuming
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the church children are healthy,
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balanced
children, is that right?
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Well, they are fairly balanced,
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they have their issues too,
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but it's a thing
that teens go through,
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you know, they grow up
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and they have
different, you know,
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it's normal for teenager
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to challenge authority to
an adolescent, this is normal.
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You know, they
are trying to develop
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their own philosophy of life.
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And so they are
thinking like adults.
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And that's why we have
conflicts and certain conflicts,
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because now they can think
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like we do and so
they tend to challenge.
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Utmost, so there is
normal, there is normal.
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Amen, so you
are bringing in here
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that you need have an
intentional game plan.
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In my mind when
you say intentional,
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the word comes to
my mind is deliberate.
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Yes, yes. Okay.
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So we have a
deliberate game plan.
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And that we want
our children to grow up
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and be
responsible men and women.
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Men and women who
have a balanced sense,
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of who are they
are in Jesus Christ.
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Absolutely. That
they want to serve
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and yet they want to
be served, is that right?
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Right, absolutely.
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And so how do you do that?
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You've been
there, you've done that.
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So whenever your son,
whenever your daughter,
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they decide they
want to do it their way.
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Now, being that you have
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an intentional
direction for their life.
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I mean, I don't
expect you to give me
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your whole family
history in five seconds.
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But I mean, how
do you handle that?
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Well, I wouldn't see that I have
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a intentional or an intentional
direction for their life
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in terms of career path. Okay.
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You know, the Bible
says train up a child
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in the way that
he or she should go,
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you know, when the child is old,
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he or she will not
depart far from that.
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So the Bible is
actually talking about
00:11:01.73\00:11:04.02
vocational tendencies here.
00:11:04.05\00:11:06.71
You know, you see
the strong points,
00:11:06.74\00:11:08.60
the strengths in a
child and you try to foster
00:11:08.63\00:11:11.55
that and kind of nudge
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a child gently
in that direction.
00:11:14.37\00:11:16.87
You know, and so that
they can better serve God.
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And the most important
thing to understand as a parent
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I think is that
there will be conflicts.
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There are no
conflict free families.
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There are no
conflict free relationships.
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You know, a person
said it to me once,
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well I've been
married for 20 years,
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and we never had an argument.
00:11:36.39\00:11:37.76
And I am saying, wow,
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Someone does not
have a personality here.
00:11:40.60\00:11:43.24
You know, a good relationship,
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you know, you will
experience conflict.
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You know, that's
where growth takes place.
00:11:48.81\00:11:51.95
But you stay on board,
you don't abandon the ship.
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You stay on boarding grow. Amen.
00:11:54.13\00:11:57.49
And often I say that
relationship plus salvific.
00:11:57.52\00:12:00.92
You know, you're growing,
00:12:00.95\00:12:02.32
you're becoming
more like Christ,
00:12:02.35\00:12:03.96
you know, as
you love your spouse
00:12:03.99\00:12:06.81
in spite of the weaknesses.
00:12:06.84\00:12:09.21
Your children in
spite of the negative things
00:12:09.24\00:12:11.64
they do that you don't like.
00:12:11.67\00:12:13.35
You continue to love.
00:12:13.38\00:12:14.75
You're becoming
more like Christ.
00:12:14.78\00:12:16.35
And that's the
time that many people
00:12:16.38\00:12:18.18
want to go out and get a divorce
and abandon the relationship,
00:12:18.21\00:12:23.09
things are going wrong.
00:12:23.12\00:12:24.49
But it's okay, you
will have struggle,
00:12:24.52\00:12:25.98
expect struggles. Amen.
00:12:26.01\00:12:27.77
That's what makes you
strong in Jesus Christ.
00:12:27.80\00:12:29.74
And this will makes
salvation more realize.
00:12:29.77\00:12:33.11
I like that--
Salvific relationship.
00:12:33.14\00:12:36.22
That's salvation, is
that take from salvation.
00:12:36.25\00:12:38.21
Yes, it is, it is
taken from salvation.
00:12:38.24\00:12:40.84
Amen. So that I have
00:12:40.87\00:12:42.24
to fall to salvation, you know,
00:12:42.27\00:12:43.74
trials are not
bad in a relationship.
00:12:43.77\00:12:46.23
And if you don't understand that
you are in one relationship,
00:12:46.26\00:12:49.57
and get into another one,
and have the same problem,
00:12:49.60\00:12:52.36
because you take the same
baggage and the same problems
00:12:52.39\00:12:55.70
that you didn't
overcome in other relationship
00:12:55.73\00:12:57.95
and they compound
and you find yourself
00:12:57.98\00:13:01.07
going in and out
of relationships.
00:13:01.10\00:13:02.76
So stay in it, stay in the
fire in the crucible as we say.
00:13:02.79\00:13:07.65
So in your family
you are the "House Man."
00:13:07.68\00:13:11.33
Yes, the house band.
00:13:11.36\00:13:12.77
House band? Yes, the husband.
00:13:12.80\00:13:15.11
The husband. Yeah.
00:13:15.14\00:13:16.82
And that
basically is the priesthood
00:13:16.85\00:13:19.50
of believers, is that right?
00:13:19.53\00:13:20.94
Absolutely. Okay.
00:13:20.97\00:13:23.01
So what is your role?
00:13:23.04\00:13:25.02
Well the role of a
priest is that of fostering.
00:13:25.05\00:13:28.83
The principles
of God in your home
00:13:28.86\00:13:32.78
upholding the standards of God,
00:13:32.81\00:13:35.64
you know, giving
spiritual insight
00:13:35.67\00:13:37.87
and guidance, it's not to
rule over or to Lord over.
00:13:37.90\00:13:42.56
You know, but it is to foster
00:13:42.59\00:13:44.41
good godly characteristics.
00:13:44.44\00:13:46.18
And I do think that God
will give you the influence
00:13:46.21\00:13:49.29
to do what you
need to do as a priest,
00:13:49.32\00:13:51.41
if you're living the life.
00:13:51.44\00:13:53.32
You know, God puts a
man in that position.
00:13:53.35\00:13:57.33
He has to do that. Amen.
00:13:57.36\00:13:59.10
You know, and a
man earns the respect
00:13:59.13\00:14:01.18
of his family when he
is not hypocritical. Yes.
00:14:01.21\00:14:04.49
You know, when
he is living a life
00:14:04.52\00:14:06.24
the best that he knows how.
00:14:06.27\00:14:07.66
So the keyword is consistency.
00:14:07.69\00:14:09.91
Consistency. Don't say
one thing and do another.
00:14:09.94\00:14:13.06
Yes. Yes, it's very important.
00:14:13.09\00:14:15.38
Now, your wife as
the mother of the house,
00:14:15.41\00:14:20.55
what is her role?
00:14:20.58\00:14:22.04
We see what the house band is?
00:14:22.07\00:14:25.30
Right, and now, yeah
both are very important,
00:14:25.33\00:14:27.86
because if the house band's
role is not carried out properly
00:14:27.89\00:14:31.05
or the husband's role is
not carried out properly.
00:14:31.08\00:14:34.04
If the man drops
the ball and then
00:14:34.07\00:14:36.65
the devil comes
in and he, you know,
00:14:36.68\00:14:39.29
God gave
children male and female.
00:14:39.32\00:14:41.89
And it's very
important to understand
00:14:41.92\00:14:43.44
that the male is
very important at home.
00:14:43.47\00:14:45.57
So if he is not there, you know,
00:14:45.60\00:14:47.16
I'm gonna come back to the wife,
00:14:47.19\00:14:48.56
but I want to say I
used to do prison ministry.
00:14:48.59\00:14:50.63
And in the prison 90%, you know,
00:14:50.66\00:14:54.26
of those they came
from a broken home,
00:14:54.29\00:14:56.89
in which the
father was not there.
00:14:56.92\00:14:59.33
So that tells me something
about the importance you know,
00:14:59.36\00:15:02.22
that male's roles,
so if he drops the ball
00:15:02.25\00:15:04.98
you know, it's a catastrophe.
00:15:05.01\00:15:08.10
But the woman's role is
to, the Bible says 'help meet.'
00:15:08.13\00:15:12.95
So they have to
work together, you know,
00:15:12.98\00:15:15.15
not one being above
the other, you know.
00:15:15.18\00:15:17.92
But now if the others want
to stray from God's principle,
00:15:17.95\00:15:21.16
it is the husband's
responsibility to say,
00:15:21.19\00:15:24.17
look God says,
we should do this,
00:15:24.20\00:15:26.06
and I think we should
obey the voice of God.
00:15:26.09\00:15:28.05
Amen. I am going
to jump to a totally
00:15:28.08\00:15:31.65
different direction right now.
00:15:31.68\00:15:33.16
We are going to talk
about the exploitation of women.
00:15:33.19\00:15:35.26
Sure. And mainly
00:15:35.29\00:15:37.49
that exploitation of
women comes from the media.
00:15:37.52\00:15:41.04
It does. Now how
do we get around that?
00:15:41.07\00:15:44.01
What's healthy?
What's not healthy?
00:15:44.04\00:15:46.62
Well, the media
puts a lot of research
00:15:46.65\00:15:51.04
into commercials, into videos.
00:15:51.07\00:15:54.42
They know what appeals
00:15:54.45\00:15:55.96
to the human eye
especially males.
00:15:55.99\00:15:59.64
You know, they know
00:15:59.67\00:16:01.09
that when a man sees an
attractive female our chemicals,
00:16:01.12\00:16:05.15
dopamine, you
know, the brain is washed
00:16:05.18\00:16:07.59
with dopamine and he
desire to repeat that behavior.
00:16:07.62\00:16:11.42
You know, over and over again
00:16:11.45\00:16:12.82
they know the psychological
ramifications involved
00:16:12.85\00:16:15.62
and it so women are exploited.
00:16:15.65\00:16:17.35
They sell anything
from what automobiles
00:16:17.38\00:16:20.67
to real estate to appliances.
00:16:20.70\00:16:23.28
You know, they sell everything
00:16:23.31\00:16:25.09
and so I think this is
a form of exploitation.
00:16:25.12\00:16:28.30
You know, even in musical videos
00:16:28.33\00:16:30.26
I mean some of the stuff I see
00:16:30.29\00:16:31.90
on TV now it's
just breathtaking.
00:16:31.93\00:16:34.69
You know, I'm ready to throw out
00:16:34.72\00:16:36.09
my television, I
cannot even watch
00:16:36.12\00:16:37.71
it in peace anymore,
because I have to watch
00:16:37.74\00:16:40.11
it with my finger
on the control switch.
00:16:40.14\00:16:43.62
I don't know
what's going to jump up,
00:16:43.65\00:16:45.26
even in a commercial.
00:16:45.29\00:16:48.41
I know that in
pastoral we got lots of calls,
00:16:48.44\00:16:52.81
that that's the reason
that they have landed on 3ABN,
00:16:52.84\00:16:55.90
because it is a family
centered Christian programming.
00:16:55.93\00:17:01.68
And they love it,
because they are not like
00:17:01.71\00:17:04.16
going to certain
other 30 minute-sitcoms.
00:17:04.19\00:17:08.61
Once you just sit there
and if you are accidentally
00:17:08.64\00:17:10.71
channel surfing
and you catch it,
00:17:10.74\00:17:12.56
and my goodness the
language that they are using.
00:17:12.59\00:17:15.51
And much well,
what they are inferring.
00:17:15.54\00:17:18.61
And it doesn't take
long before Satan fans way
00:17:18.64\00:17:21.33
to slip right in there.
00:17:21.36\00:17:22.73
If you decide, oops,
what is this about, you know?
00:17:22.76\00:17:25.93
And so that's the reason,
that's one of the reasons
00:17:25.96\00:17:28.94
that 3ABN is
becoming so popular.
00:17:28.97\00:17:31.79
Absolutely. It's
because, you know,
00:17:31.82\00:17:33.51
it's not sitting
there flirting with things
00:17:33.54\00:17:36.04
that will invite Satan into
your home and into your life.
00:17:36.07\00:17:39.93
But I can imagine
a poor lady out here,
00:17:39.96\00:17:42.64
just trying to do the
very best that she can.
00:17:42.67\00:17:45.39
Maybe that she was
a little prettier than
00:17:45.42\00:17:48.31
maybe her next door
neighbor something like that.
00:17:48.34\00:17:51.75
But yet, she can
get a lot of baggage
00:17:51.78\00:17:53.52
that she's going to carry along,
00:17:53.55\00:17:54.92
because of all
this exploitation.
00:17:54.95\00:17:56.49
Right. The media, you
know, praise God for 3ABN,
00:17:56.52\00:18:00.74
I think God's
blessings of finding the program
00:18:00.77\00:18:03.97
and I pray, you know,
that He will continue to lead.
00:18:04.00\00:18:06.90
I love the
direction it is going.
00:18:06.93\00:18:09.60
But we have to also understand
00:18:09.63\00:18:11.43
I guess that this
system of the world,
00:18:11.46\00:18:14.02
you know, we
talk about the world.
00:18:14.05\00:18:15.67
What do we mean when we
say come out of the world.
00:18:15.70\00:18:18.80
You know, there
is a worldly system
00:18:18.83\00:18:20.42
that Satan is working through.
00:18:20.45\00:18:21.92
You know, that's
not meant to foster
00:18:21.96\00:18:25.60
any positive characters,
you know, in children.
00:18:25.63\00:18:28.73
You know, it's a worldly system,
00:18:28.76\00:18:30.95
you know, even in Hollywood.
00:18:30.98\00:18:34.06
So I guess we need to be a aware
00:18:34.09\00:18:37.16
of that so as we get
closer to the end of time,
00:18:37.19\00:18:40.70
I do think many
program like 3ABN will develop,
00:18:40.73\00:18:44.67
you know, because of the need
00:18:44.70\00:18:46.28
or the desire for
those sincere people
00:18:46.31\00:18:48.87
who are trying to
obey God, you know.
00:18:48.90\00:18:51.44
To have some type of
alternative, you know.
00:18:51.47\00:18:54.39
And 3ABN
provides that alternative.
00:18:54.42\00:18:56.94
Amen, amen. Well
it's just amazing
00:18:56.97\00:18:59.73
how the doors are opening up.
00:18:59.76\00:19:01.16
God is opening up
the doors, because people
00:19:01.19\00:19:03.16
are looking for an
alternative. Right.
00:19:03.19\00:19:05.28
They're looking for something
that's clean for something
00:19:05.31\00:19:07.52
as descent that the whole family
00:19:07.55\00:19:08.92
can watch--and not
only that it's educational.
00:19:08.95\00:19:11.65
Absolutely. You know,
00:19:11.68\00:19:13.05
of which I don't
understand the dopamine
00:19:13.08\00:19:15.31
and all that kind of stuff.
00:19:15.34\00:19:16.72
Right, I guess I should
have explained it better.
00:19:16.75\00:19:20.28
It is a chemical
that is also in the brain.
00:19:20.31\00:19:23.43
See the body
naturally has certain chemicals.
00:19:23.46\00:19:27.23
You know, cocaine
really does that make us high.
00:19:27.26\00:19:30.71
What it does it blocks the
receptor so that the --well,
00:19:30.74\00:19:36.21
I don't want to get
into the biological book,
00:19:36.24\00:19:38.05
but it keeps the chemical
in our nervous system longer,
00:19:38.08\00:19:41.63
so that we would feel elated.
00:19:41.66\00:19:44.32
Okay, so it's a
pleasure drug is--
00:19:44.35\00:19:46.22
It is involved when
there is the addiction to sex
00:19:46.25\00:19:50.18
or to drugs, alcohol, you know,
00:19:50.21\00:19:53.56
that's one of those
chemicals that's involved.
00:19:53.59\00:19:56.04
And that's what
makes you want to repeat,
00:19:56.08\00:19:58.42
that's your incentive
for repeat in the behavior.
00:19:58.45\00:20:00.76
Amen. Boy, it's complicated.
00:20:00.79\00:20:03.46
Yeah, I'm trying
not to be complicated.
00:20:03.49\00:20:05.48
I'm trying not to be.
00:20:05.51\00:20:06.88
Now whenever you are
in the academic world,
00:20:06.91\00:20:08.37
you know, you are so bright.
00:20:08.40\00:20:11.65
Our word is trying to
keep up over here you know--
00:20:11.68\00:20:13.05
I'm trying to stay simple, yeah.
00:20:13.08\00:20:14.45
You are doing wonderful.
00:20:14.48\00:20:15.85
Let's go to, because
of all of this happening,
00:20:15.88\00:20:20.17
all this peripheral
activities going on.
00:20:20.21\00:20:22.82
Exploitation,
drugs, media, you know,
00:20:22.85\00:20:26.80
sex, rock and roll.
00:20:26.83\00:20:30.70
We got divorce. Right.
00:20:30.73\00:20:32.69
We have divorce and--
00:20:32.72\00:20:35.03
And the broken dreams.
00:20:35.06\00:20:36.87
Broken dreams and many
and I must say the ministry
00:20:36.90\00:20:41.21
is not exempt from divorces.
00:20:41.24\00:20:44.89
You know, when key people
00:20:44.92\00:20:46.33
in key positions, young people
00:20:46.36\00:20:47.98
see it and they
say, well, wow, you know,
00:20:48.01\00:20:51.22
if they can't keep it together
00:20:51.25\00:20:53.18
there is no hope
you know, for us.
00:20:53.21\00:20:55.31
And so we just as
well cohabitate and,
00:20:55.34\00:20:58.44
you know, not cross the line.
00:20:58.47\00:20:59.97
And that's another
dangerous thing to do.
00:21:00.00\00:21:02.41
So we have to pray.
00:21:02.44\00:21:08.15
We have to pray. Amen.
00:21:08.18\00:21:09.59
Amen. Because we do hear stories
00:21:09.62\00:21:12.95
all the time, well
this didn't work out,
00:21:12.98\00:21:15.09
this didn't work out, you know.
00:21:15.12\00:21:16.49
And so it does
catch us in a net,
00:21:16.52\00:21:18.79
it's kind of like a
spider web out there, you know.
00:21:18.82\00:21:21.13
It just seems
like, you know that,
00:21:21.16\00:21:23.80
if you are not careful,
you can just--oh I'm going
00:21:23.83\00:21:26.74
to push the envelope
a little bit, you know.
00:21:26.77\00:21:28.60
And may be step over there
00:21:28.63\00:21:30.00
and get yourself
caught in that web.
00:21:30.03\00:21:31.55
Absolutely, and
also we have to look
00:21:31.58\00:21:33.89
at it from a
eschatological perspective,
00:21:33.92\00:21:37.36
sorry about that word.
00:21:37.39\00:21:38.76
And what does it mean? You know,
00:21:38.79\00:21:40.16
live in time perspective,
the great controversy.
00:21:40.19\00:21:43.14
See if we can
look at this situation
00:21:43.18\00:21:45.95
from the standpoint
of the great controversy.
00:21:45.98\00:21:49.60
You know, we are
involved in great conflict,
00:21:49.63\00:21:52.34
and the devil is
after the minister.
00:21:52.37\00:21:54.67
Amen. In the pulpit.
00:21:54.70\00:21:56.07
Amen. You know, he would
00:21:56.23\00:21:57.60
get in your children.
00:21:57.63\00:21:59.00
He would get in your spouses,
00:21:59.03\00:22:00.40
so that you will lose
your moral authority, you know.
00:22:00.43\00:22:03.15
But my encouragement
is keep on ministering,
00:22:03.18\00:22:06.51
you know, keep on ministering
00:22:06.54\00:22:07.91
and make it a character-building
moment, you know,
00:22:07.94\00:22:10.45
because God can still use
you, although you go through
00:22:10.48\00:22:12.91
those experiences, God
can use you in a greater way.
00:22:12.94\00:22:16.49
And so no one is exempt
from the problems of life.
00:22:16.52\00:22:21.93
Because you know, we talk about
00:22:21.96\00:22:23.36
the great
controversy and it seems
00:22:23.39\00:22:25.07
like with many people
that may just go over your head
00:22:25.10\00:22:27.51
that's one of
those Christian terms.
00:22:27.54\00:22:29.29
Right, right, right.
Between good and evil
00:22:29.32\00:22:30.69
that there is indeed a
war that's going on. Yes.
00:22:30.72\00:22:34.37
And these are the repercussions
of that war that's going on.
00:22:34.41\00:22:39.35
Absolutely.
You've got reality here,
00:22:39.38\00:22:41.64
and you got deception over here.
00:22:41.67\00:22:43.68
Right, right, right.
And you know, and people,
00:22:43.71\00:22:46.87
and probably going
back to what you first said,
00:22:46.90\00:22:50.06
talking about, if
they are not intentionally,
00:22:50.09\00:22:52.25
if the parents aren't deliberate
bringing their children up.
00:22:52.28\00:22:54.99
Listen, God has a
plan for your life.
00:22:55.02\00:22:57.05
Absolutely. You know,
00:22:57.08\00:22:58.45
if you will turn
your life over to Him,
00:22:58.48\00:23:00.75
if you will
invite the Holy Spirit
00:23:00.78\00:23:02.29
in through His
grace, He will direct you.
00:23:02.32\00:23:06.15
And seems like that
taken the high road.
00:23:06.18\00:23:08.78
Absolutely. Verses you know,
00:23:08.81\00:23:11.26
you got the other set over here,
00:23:11.29\00:23:12.66
just want to do
at their own way.
00:23:12.69\00:23:14.06
Oh, daddy, you don't understand,
00:23:14.09\00:23:15.46
I'm a little bit different.
00:23:15.49\00:23:16.86
Now how we are going
to bring that backup here?
00:23:16.89\00:23:18.89
Well, son I do know, you know,
00:23:18.92\00:23:21.14
Jesus Christ knew, He walked
00:23:21.17\00:23:22.74
the same earth as
we do. Absolutely.
00:23:22.77\00:23:24.63
And the Bible
is perfectly clear,
00:23:24.66\00:23:26.11
if that there wasn't anything
we are going through today
00:23:26.14\00:23:27.74
that He didn't go through.
00:23:27.77\00:23:29.14
All points
attempted, you are right.
00:23:29.17\00:23:30.54
How in the world-- how
do we balance all of this?
00:23:30.57\00:23:34.02
We balance it by understanding
00:23:34.05\00:23:35.88
that we are in a great war
between good and evil, you know.
00:23:35.91\00:23:40.45
And our hope is that
we would hang in there
00:23:40.48\00:23:42.74
and keep serving God.
00:23:42.77\00:23:45.02
You know, we will come through,
00:23:45.05\00:23:47.59
you know, but
the greatest mistake
00:23:47.62\00:23:49.29
we can make is to
let go off the arm of God
00:23:49.32\00:23:53.21
or to step back from ministry.
00:23:53.24\00:23:56.02
You see, you
remain faithful to God
00:23:56.05\00:23:57.65
regardless of
what comes your way?
00:23:57.68\00:23:59.47
And I think that's
where the reward is.
00:23:59.50\00:24:01.07
Amen. Now we are so happy
00:24:01.10\00:24:04.53
because mom and
dad had made it through
00:24:04.56\00:24:07.10
their first
seven years of marriage
00:24:07.13\00:24:09.04
or eight years of marriage.
00:24:09.08\00:24:10.51
Is this the easiest
time of their relationship
00:24:10.54\00:24:13.15
or is this is the hardest
time of their relationship?
00:24:13.18\00:24:15.74
Is it still going
uphill after a year eight
00:24:15.77\00:24:18.06
or is it going downhill?
00:24:18.09\00:24:19.66
Have they reached the plateau?
00:24:19.69\00:24:21.14
What's going on?
00:24:21.17\00:24:22.70
Well, there are
many dynamics here.
00:24:22.73\00:24:24.70
We are dealing within
the first seven years.
00:24:24.73\00:24:27.55
And the most difficult part
I would say for seven years.
00:24:27.58\00:24:33.22
Number one, the
euphoria of that first love,
00:24:33.25\00:24:37.29
you know, people
get on this love high.
00:24:37.32\00:24:40.69
And they tend to think
it's going to last forever,
00:24:40.72\00:24:44.23
but at best you
get a year out of this,
00:24:44.26\00:24:46.87
six months to a year.
00:24:46.90\00:24:48.44
After that, what?
00:24:48.47\00:24:50.29
You know, if you have not built
00:24:50.32\00:24:51.89
a strong
foundational Jesus Christ,
00:24:51.92\00:24:55.39
you are in trouble, or
the marriage is in trouble.
00:24:55.42\00:24:59.47
God pays is the love
you want to operate in.
00:24:59.50\00:25:02.38
Love because it is
the right thing to do.
00:25:02.41\00:25:04.34
Love because this is
what God would have you to do.
00:25:04.37\00:25:08.48
And so the euphoria is gone.
00:25:08.51\00:25:10.66
Now you're going
to have conflicts,
00:25:10.69\00:25:12.21
you're seeing the
side of your spouse
00:25:12.24\00:25:13.69
that you've never seen before.
00:25:13.72\00:25:16.28
You know, and the
biological changes,
00:25:16.31\00:25:18.71
midlife crisis, and menopause
00:25:18.74\00:25:21.24
and all kinds
of things going on.
00:25:21.27\00:25:23.73
You know, where
spouses will gain weight
00:25:23.76\00:25:25.67
and different
features will begin to change.
00:25:25.70\00:25:29.12
And who are men and
men if they are not rooted
00:25:29.15\00:25:30.86
in Jesus Christ will
look for younger females
00:25:30.89\00:25:34.79
to make sure they still have
it or they are not losing it.
00:25:34.82\00:25:37.45
So we have
physiological, spiritual things
00:25:37.48\00:25:40.39
that is going on you know,
00:25:40.42\00:25:41.96
and we have to be aware of that,
00:25:41.99\00:25:43.48
and we, I
believe, if we are aware,
00:25:43.51\00:25:46.59
we can avert many problems,
you know, that we're having,
00:25:46.62\00:25:50.03
because a grass is
not as green as it looks.
00:25:50.06\00:25:52.57
It's a
deception, it is a mirage,
00:25:52.60\00:25:55.07
they say it creates,
you know, to deceive us.
00:25:55.10\00:25:58.31
And once we go chasing it,
he leads us to destruction.
00:25:58.34\00:26:01.81
Amen. All our
life it is so miserable
00:26:01.84\00:26:04.06
that we wish we had never gone.
00:26:04.09\00:26:06.17
Amen. What a neat--
what a neat word mirage,
00:26:06.20\00:26:09.67
'Cause I think that
boy, the light came on
00:26:09.70\00:26:13.01
when you said 'mirage.'
00:26:13.04\00:26:14.74
Because I remember you know,
00:26:14.78\00:26:16.15
as you're lost walking
through the desert you know,
00:26:16.18\00:26:19.76
and you think
that you see the oasis.
00:26:19.79\00:26:22.16
And so you know,
you buy into it and boy
00:26:22.19\00:26:24.68
it gives you that extra
little after get to the oasis
00:26:24.71\00:26:27.62
and of course you get there.
00:26:27.65\00:26:29.02
Disappointment. Yeah.
00:26:29.05\00:26:30.84
Let's talk about
in the last say...
00:26:30.87\00:26:32.69
minute, 'spiritual preparation.'
00:26:32.72\00:26:36.08
Okay, for the
common or for families?
00:26:36.11\00:26:39.16
For families. Okay.
00:26:39.19\00:26:41.22
Spiritual
preparation is very important.
00:26:41.25\00:26:43.03
It's the only way we
are going to be spared
00:26:43.06\00:26:45.10
many of the social
yields in the world today,
00:26:45.13\00:26:47.21
although, we are
influenced by them greatly.
00:26:47.24\00:26:50.81
Number one, we have to create
00:26:50.84\00:26:52.21
an environment in our home,
00:26:52.24\00:26:53.61
it should be
spiritual and nurturing.
00:26:53.64\00:26:55.59
And now just enforcing the love
00:26:55.62\00:26:57.58
you know, in a negative way.
00:26:57.61\00:26:58.98
But in love, you know
00:26:59.01\00:27:00.38
love your
children, love your family.
00:27:00.41\00:27:02.64
Number two. Make sure they go
00:27:02.67\00:27:04.04
to a Christian
school as much as possible.
00:27:04.07\00:27:06.91
Christian schools
do have their downside,
00:27:06.94\00:27:09.60
you know, but I
rather have my children
00:27:09.63\00:27:11.32
in a Christian school
then in a secular school
00:27:11.35\00:27:14.28
any day where God
is freely talked about.
00:27:14.31\00:27:18.22
Number three, make sure
00:27:18.25\00:27:19.92
when you are starting a
family that you don't do
00:27:19.96\00:27:22.68
it prematurely. Amen.
00:27:22.71\00:27:24.74
Take time. You tell some people
00:27:24.77\00:27:27.13
that it takes three
years to get to know someone,
00:27:27.16\00:27:30.88
they want to
drawback, but it takes time.
00:27:30.91\00:27:33.54
And make sure you're
following God's direction.
00:27:33.57\00:27:37.31
Dr. Weems, I
just want to thank you
00:27:37.34\00:27:38.79
so much for being with us
today on ''Issues and Answers.''
00:27:38.82\00:27:42.11
Yeah, thank you for
having me and I look forward
00:27:42.14\00:27:44.27
to do it in again sometime.
00:27:44.30\00:27:45.84
We will do it again sometime.
00:27:45.87\00:27:47.41
Thank you. I just
want to thank each one
00:27:47.44\00:27:49.57
of you for being with us
today on "Issues and Answers.''
00:27:49.60\00:27:52.23
I know that we all learned
00:27:52.26\00:27:53.65
something special
today, God bless you.
00:27:53.68\00:27:56.00