Welcome to "Issues and
Answers." My name is J.D. Quinn.
00:00:29.67\00:00:33.05
Glad that you are
able to join us today.
00:00:33.08\00:00:35.17
Today we have a
wonderful topic called
00:00:35.20\00:00:37.55
"The Issue of Mate Selection."
00:00:37.58\00:00:40.60
I like to start
off with a scripture.
00:00:40.63\00:00:44.28
Our scripture today is taken
from 2 Corinthians 6:14-15.
00:00:44.31\00:00:49.87
"Do not be yoked
together with unbelievers.
00:00:49.90\00:00:52.83
For what do righteousness
and wickedness have in common?
00:00:52.86\00:00:55.83
Or what fellowship can
have light with darkness?
00:00:55.86\00:00:59.04
What harmony is there
between Christ and Belial?
00:00:59.07\00:01:01.90
And what does a believer have
in common with an unbeliever?"
00:01:01.93\00:01:05.54
We have some experts on
this particular topic today.
00:01:05.57\00:01:09.44
And so I'm glad to introduce you
00:01:09.47\00:01:12.10
to Pastor Mike Tucker
and Pastor Gayle Tucker.
00:01:12.13\00:01:16.66
And they are from Arlington,
Texas in the Metroplex area
00:01:16.69\00:01:19.97
and they manage a
church there of 1,800 members,
00:01:20.00\00:01:23.48
a large church. That's right.
00:01:23.51\00:01:25.06
And not only that, but
you're also the Speaker
00:01:25.09\00:01:27.60
and Director for "Faith
For Today." That's right.
00:01:27.63\00:01:29.64
Which I would assume
is a fulltime job there.
00:01:29.67\00:01:31.60
It is indeed.
00:01:31.63\00:01:33.00
And of course his
lovely wife, she is--
00:01:33.03\00:01:36.24
I think handles administrative
duties of that large church
00:01:36.27\00:01:40.39
plus the Children's
Ministry, the Worship Ministry,
00:01:40.42\00:01:44.02
and probably no
tongue what else?
00:01:44.05\00:01:46.00
Several other things,
but we have a good time.
00:01:46.03\00:01:48.24
I can imagine.
00:01:48.27\00:01:49.64
Would you like to share
anything in additional to that?
00:01:49.67\00:01:52.38
Oh, just-- the fact
that the Lord has blessed
00:01:52.41\00:01:54.59
with Faith For Today's Ministry
00:01:54.62\00:01:56.09
and we're excited
about things coming up.
00:01:56.12\00:01:58.34
We're shooting new
lifestyle magazines
00:01:58.37\00:02:00.47
and we're also going to be doing
00:02:00.50\00:02:02.53
a NET 2007 right
there from Arlington.
00:02:02.56\00:02:05.88
So the Lord has been blessing.
We got a lot in our plate.
00:02:05.91\00:02:09.15
I know today is a
topic that there's many,
00:02:09.18\00:02:11.69
many people are interested in
00:02:11.72\00:02:13.77
and that is mate selection.
00:02:13.80\00:02:16.41
So why don't we just get
right into middle of all of that
00:02:16.44\00:02:19.48
and just kind
of-and bond over this.
00:02:19.51\00:02:21.50
Dive right in. Yes.
00:02:21.53\00:02:23.35
We have a young congregation
00:02:23.38\00:02:25.34
and a lot of
singles in our congregation
00:02:25.37\00:02:28.24
and a lot of them would like
to no longer be single. Amen.
00:02:28.27\00:02:31.83
And so as they talk
about that they have asked--
00:02:31.86\00:02:33.99
you know, how do you
go about this process?
00:02:34.02\00:02:36.85
I think the
first thing is to begin
00:02:36.88\00:02:38.45
to think about God's timing
00:02:38.48\00:02:40.17
and God's will for your
life, those are key issues.
00:02:40.20\00:02:43.04
'Cause God may
say yes to marriage
00:02:43.07\00:02:44.80
but not right now and if
you push ahead to make it now,
00:02:44.83\00:02:47.87
then you're out of His timing.
00:02:47.90\00:02:49.86
There are also
others-- who God says,
00:02:49.89\00:02:52.17
you know, marriage may
not be the option for you.
00:02:52.20\00:02:54.42
It may not be the
right thing for you.
00:02:54.45\00:02:56.24
In such case we should not view
00:02:56.27\00:02:57.80
singleness as a
disease. Absolutely.
00:02:57.83\00:03:00.42
You know
singleness is all right.
00:03:00.45\00:03:02.18
And in fact the
Apostle Paul said
00:03:02.21\00:03:03.82
that he wish that everyone can
be like him and live that way.
00:03:03.85\00:03:07.84
But not everyone
can nor should everyone,
00:03:07.87\00:03:10.45
but still if that's
what God has for you,
00:03:10.48\00:03:12.29
that's what you need.
00:03:12.32\00:03:13.69
And we need to go with that.
00:03:13.72\00:03:15.24
But after that then
if indeed we feel like
00:03:15.27\00:03:17.47
that this is God's will
and maybe even His timing
00:03:17.50\00:03:19.66
and we want to
start this process,
00:03:19.69\00:03:21.85
then we start to look
first of all inside, don't we?
00:03:21.88\00:03:25.04
And strangely enough,
I think the first thing
00:03:25.07\00:03:26.99
is not to look to find a mate,
00:03:27.02\00:03:29.49
but to look to
be the right mate.
00:03:29.52\00:03:31.48
Yeah. Amen.
00:03:31.51\00:03:32.88
And when we start
to grow spiritually,
00:03:32.91\00:03:35.66
emotionally, intellectually,
00:03:35.69\00:03:38.60
that is what is going to make us
00:03:38.63\00:03:40.34
the right person
to be in relationship.
00:03:40.37\00:03:43.53
Cloud and Townsend
wrote a book this is--
00:03:43.56\00:03:45.48
it's called "21 Days
to a Happy Marriage."
00:03:45.51\00:03:48.24
And each day you're
supposed to do one thing,
00:03:48.27\00:03:51.03
you know, that you
learned about relationships.
00:03:51.06\00:03:53.62
And the very
first thing is to grow,
00:03:53.65\00:03:56.46
continue to grow. Amen.
00:03:56.49\00:03:58.52
If we're going to
be the right person
00:03:58.55\00:04:00.30
and in marriage
growth is going to be
00:04:00.33\00:04:03.07
the number one
thing we need to do,
00:04:03.10\00:04:05.06
we should start
that ahead of time.
00:04:05.09\00:04:07.03
So rather than
looking for a mate,
00:04:07.06\00:04:09.94
look to be the right
person that you need to be.
00:04:09.97\00:04:13.19
Spend time with Jesus Christ.
00:04:13.22\00:04:15.59
Let Him become your all in all
00:04:15.62\00:04:18.28
and find that you are complete
00:04:18.31\00:04:20.94
and whole on your own
before you ever look for a mate.
00:04:20.97\00:04:25.06
And realize that you
don't need that person
00:04:25.09\00:04:27.28
in order to be happy. Right.
00:04:27.31\00:04:28.89
You know two happy people
00:04:28.92\00:04:30.29
are what it takes to
make a happy marriage. Right.
00:04:30.32\00:04:32.60
And someone said it
recently that if you're happy
00:04:32.63\00:04:37.53
and you get married
nothing your spouse can do--
00:04:37.56\00:04:41.06
can take that happiness
away. Amen. That's right.
00:04:41.09\00:04:43.05
But if you're not
happy and you get married
00:04:43.08\00:04:45.30
nothing your spouse
can do, can make you happy.
00:04:45.33\00:04:47.60
Make you happy, that's right.
00:04:47.63\00:04:49.00
I know that-- I
talked to people daily
00:04:49.03\00:04:51.08
and there's lots of
people that I talk to
00:04:51.11\00:04:52.89
are single people
and I used to do this.
00:04:52.92\00:04:56.41
I say, why don't we
just have a pray-- a prayer,
00:04:56.44\00:04:59.03
we'll pray for a godly
man to come into your life.
00:04:59.06\00:05:03.15
And then one day
the Lord impressed me,
00:05:03.18\00:05:05.59
J.D. that's not the
way to go about this.
00:05:05.62\00:05:08.12
If you're talking to a
female you need to say,
00:05:08.15\00:05:10.98
Lord, prepare me to be a
godly wife. That's right.
00:05:11.01\00:05:14.03
And same thing with a male.
00:05:14.06\00:05:15.87
Prepare me to
be a godly husband,
00:05:15.90\00:05:18.13
because now you're
involved. Absolutely.
00:05:18.16\00:05:20.96
You see, and God's honors that
00:05:20.99\00:05:23.25
rather than
sitting here and say,
00:05:23.28\00:05:24.65
I'm looking for
a free gift. Right.
00:05:24.68\00:05:26.37
Why don't you send me a
godly husband, you know.
00:05:26.40\00:05:29.07
Well, and sometimes I
think God is waiting to say,
00:05:29.10\00:05:31.21
okay, I've got that
person that you need to be,
00:05:31.24\00:05:34.48
but you need to be first.
00:05:34.51\00:05:35.88
You're not ready for
this person, that's right.
00:05:35.91\00:05:37.28
You kind of free him up to bring
that person into your life. Yes.
00:05:37.31\00:05:39.73
The other thing we find
is that when your life starts
00:05:39.76\00:05:41.79
to come together
and you are happy
00:05:41.82\00:05:44.22
with who you are in the Lord--
00:05:44.25\00:05:46.38
you've taken care of
your love issue so to speak.
00:05:46.41\00:05:48.69
We can talk about
that a little bit later.
00:05:48.72\00:05:50.41
You've taken
care of those things.
00:05:50.44\00:05:51.81
Then you begin to
attract the right person.
00:05:51.84\00:05:56.03
People who are looking--
00:05:56.06\00:05:57.55
are looking for
someone that they admire,
00:05:57.58\00:06:00.13
that they find to have strength,
00:06:00.16\00:06:01.77
someone that would
complement their own life
00:06:01.80\00:06:05.21
and if you're the right person
00:06:05.24\00:06:06.61
you're gonna
attract the right person.
00:06:06.64\00:06:08.11
I've written a
book recently entitled
00:06:08.14\00:06:09.77
10 Keys to Happy Marriage
00:06:09.80\00:06:11.17
and it's taken
from the Book of Ruth.
00:06:11.20\00:06:13.20
And Ruth found a right husband
00:06:13.23\00:06:15.41
because she was the right woman.
00:06:15.44\00:06:18.18
Boaz saw her
gleaning in his field
00:06:18.21\00:06:20.75
and recognized
the stories about her
00:06:20.78\00:06:22.72
that she was
faithful to her mother-in-law,
00:06:22.75\00:06:24.72
was caring for this woman.
00:06:24.75\00:06:26.19
She didn't have to
comeback to Israel with her,
00:06:26.22\00:06:27.78
she could have stayed in Moab
00:06:27.81\00:06:29.22
but she loved her mother-in-law,
she was taking care of her,
00:06:29.25\00:06:31.71
she let mom stay at home,
00:06:31.74\00:06:33.81
while she went out to glean
00:06:33.84\00:06:35.51
so that it
wouldn't embarrass mom.
00:06:35.54\00:06:36.96
She did that work for her
and kept mom out of the sun.
00:06:36.99\00:06:40.45
And Boaz saw this and
said this is a righteous woman
00:06:40.48\00:06:43.58
I need to know this girl
and he was drawn to her already
00:06:43.61\00:06:47.25
because she was
the right person.
00:06:47.28\00:06:49.22
And she was drawn to him
00:06:49.25\00:06:50.62
because he was also a
person of character. Right.
00:06:50.65\00:06:53.10
You know, when he saw
her he immediately wanted
00:06:53.13\00:06:55.40
to care for her and
make sure she was protected.
00:06:55.43\00:06:57.90
You know, give her lunch
00:06:57.93\00:06:59.30
and keep her
away from the workers
00:06:59.33\00:07:00.80
and, you know,
all of these things.
00:07:00.83\00:07:02.53
He was a person of character
00:07:02.56\00:07:03.93
and she recognized
that in him as well.
00:07:03.96\00:07:05.65
Now how do you think that
the Lord entered into this?
00:07:05.68\00:07:08.59
Well, I think the Lord
had that planned all along.
00:07:08.62\00:07:10.74
First of all
there was no accident
00:07:10.77\00:07:12.46
that the Ruth
gleaned in that field.
00:07:12.49\00:07:14.34
Absolutely. Yes.
00:07:14.37\00:07:15.74
She didn't know her
way around certainly.
00:07:15.77\00:07:17.48
But she went and
started to glean in this field
00:07:17.51\00:07:19.38
and Naomi didn't send her to
it because afterwards she said,
00:07:19.41\00:07:22.64
where did you gleaned today?
00:07:22.67\00:07:24.19
In the field of
a man named Boaz.
00:07:24.22\00:07:27.35
The bell started to ring
00:07:27.38\00:07:28.75
and she started to
think about this, you know.
00:07:28.78\00:07:31.14
But God's hand
was in this all along
00:07:31.17\00:07:33.97
and started guiding
them together I think.
00:07:34.00\00:07:36.35
I think you made
a good point there
00:07:36.38\00:07:38.19
because, you know, that same God
00:07:38.22\00:07:40.04
is perfectly
capable today. Amen.
00:07:40.07\00:07:42.18
Of bringing the
right people together. Yes.
00:07:42.21\00:07:44.70
And our pursuit really
is not for that person.
00:07:44.73\00:07:47.56
Our pursuit is for God and
for growth in our own lives.
00:07:47.59\00:07:51.52
Ruth Graham Bell wrote,
00:07:51.55\00:07:53.13
"If God had
answered all my prayers,
00:07:53.16\00:07:54.83
I would have married the
wrong man several times."
00:07:54.86\00:07:59.42
So usually it's not
a good prayer to say,
00:07:59.45\00:08:02.01
Lord, give me this
man, give me this woman,
00:08:02.04\00:08:04.34
but instead, Lord,
make me the right person
00:08:04.37\00:08:06.47
and fulfill your will
in my life in your time.
00:08:06.50\00:08:09.25
Put me in the right
place. That's right.
00:08:09.28\00:08:10.66
Put that person in the
right place. That's right.
00:08:10.69\00:08:12.69
And if you have this
relationship with the Lord,
00:08:12.72\00:08:14.69
it seems like just
miraculously things
00:08:14.72\00:08:16.66
workout like
that. It does. It does.
00:08:16.69\00:08:18.59
You know, there
are no accidents. No.
00:08:18.62\00:08:20.21
You know, I mean
everything is providential so.
00:08:20.24\00:08:23.58
Probably the starting place
is, is natural that we have
00:08:23.61\00:08:26.64
in that
relationship with the Lord.
00:08:26.67\00:08:28.28
Now I think the other
thing the person listening
00:08:28.31\00:08:30.14
to this program
saying, well, you know,
00:08:30.17\00:08:31.89
I've waited all
these years, I guess,
00:08:31.92\00:08:33.53
there's something wrong with me,
00:08:33.56\00:08:34.93
I'm not the right person. Right.
00:08:34.96\00:08:36.71
It also has to do
with God's timing.
00:08:36.74\00:08:39.66
And so you know, don't
beat yourself up and say,
00:08:39.69\00:08:42.25
oh, I'm not the right person.
00:08:42.28\00:08:44.20
God's timing will be
perfect and we don't know
00:08:44.23\00:08:47.14
what His timing
is for you, you know.
00:08:47.17\00:08:49.75
But as you're
waiting for God's timing,
00:08:49.78\00:08:51.46
other things that you can
do to prepare yourself for this
00:08:51.49\00:08:54.36
is to see whether or
not you have any love issues
00:08:54.39\00:08:57.03
that need to be
taken care off. Yes.
00:08:57.06\00:08:58.99
Are the things in your own life
00:08:59.02\00:09:00.39
that would hamper a
relationship with a mate?
00:09:00.42\00:09:03.31
Now, let's say that
you're a young woman
00:09:03.34\00:09:05.12
or even an older woman
00:09:05.15\00:09:06.59
and basically you had a
very strange relationship
00:09:06.62\00:09:09.32
with your father or
your father was abusive
00:09:09.35\00:09:12.23
or you're distant
from him or he was absent.
00:09:12.26\00:09:15.47
Chances are very good that
you have a love relationship--
00:09:15.50\00:09:18.19
a love issue that is based
00:09:18.22\00:09:19.80
on that nonexistent relationship
or that bad relationship,
00:09:19.83\00:09:24.01
because a woman
learns how to relate to a man
00:09:24.04\00:09:26.95
through her
relationship with her father.
00:09:26.98\00:09:29.44
And that's the
relationship that tells her
00:09:29.47\00:09:31.23
that she's a valuable
person, that she's a princess.
00:09:31.26\00:09:33.64
Someone who's desirous
00:09:33.67\00:09:36.00
and someone who
should be pursued.
00:09:36.03\00:09:38.03
It is the
relationship with the father
00:09:38.06\00:09:40.20
and if that did not exist,
00:09:40.23\00:09:41.63
then there maybe some
work that needs to be done.
00:09:41.66\00:09:44.35
In my pastoring--
the times when I tried to
00:09:44.38\00:09:47.68
with the young woman's
help re-father that young woman.
00:09:47.71\00:09:52.78
And basically I can be kind
of a substitute father figure
00:09:52.81\00:09:56.63
and my job is to tell
her that she is special. Yes.
00:09:56.66\00:09:59.50
That she is God's princess. Yes.
00:09:59.53\00:10:01.47
That she is a beautiful
young woman inside and out
00:10:01.50\00:10:04.76
and that's the most
important thing is the inside.
00:10:04.79\00:10:07.53
But that--she is
someone who's deserving
00:10:07.56\00:10:09.85
of a quality relationship. Amen.
00:10:09.88\00:10:11.89
It is my job to tell her
that I always believe in her,
00:10:11.92\00:10:14.59
that I'm always on her
side, that I always support her.
00:10:14.62\00:10:17.65
And then I'm
always proud of her.
00:10:17.68\00:10:19.65
And there are-- a few
young women of my church
00:10:19.68\00:10:22.05
who have my phone
number they call every now
00:10:22.08\00:10:24.55
and then when something
is going on in their life--
00:10:24.58\00:10:26.88
in fact a couple of these
young women in our church,
00:10:26.91\00:10:29.26
we just adore,
they're just precious.
00:10:29.29\00:10:30.97
They call us "Pastor
Mom and Pastor Dad." Amen.
00:10:31.00\00:10:33.54
You know, we're
Pastor Mom and Pastor Dad
00:10:33.57\00:10:36.32
to these young women.
00:10:36.35\00:10:37.72
And it is a joy at
this stage in our life
00:10:37.75\00:10:40.34
to be able to help
re-father young women.
00:10:40.37\00:10:43.11
And the same thing can
happen with young men as well,
00:10:43.14\00:10:45.91
so that you begin to see
your value in the eyes of God,
00:10:45.94\00:10:49.92
as a father
should have shown you,
00:10:49.95\00:10:52.51
as a mother
should have shown you,
00:10:52.54\00:10:53.91
but maybe did not.
00:10:53.94\00:10:55.31
So take care of those
love issues in your life
00:10:55.34\00:10:59.06
and then you're
ready for the next step.
00:10:59.09\00:11:00.72
I would think that, that
would be probably the epitome
00:11:00.75\00:11:04.02
of our part of our
being here on this earth
00:11:04.05\00:11:06.63
is to have people look
at you as mom and pop. Yeah.
00:11:06.66\00:11:09.79
Whatever you're not
biologically you can't. Yeah.
00:11:09.82\00:11:12.05
Because I see something
special in that couple,
00:11:12.08\00:11:15.79
because there are so
many hurting people out there,
00:11:15.82\00:11:17.93
you know, that are
really just floundering.
00:11:17.96\00:11:20.20
They really are.
00:11:20.23\00:11:21.60
There are so many young
people that have no foundation
00:11:21.63\00:11:24.83
upon which to base decisions,
00:11:24.86\00:11:27.37
upon which to pursue
anyone in a relationship
00:11:27.40\00:11:32.13
because they haven't seen
it, they haven't experienced it,
00:11:32.16\00:11:35.56
they don't--
they maybe don't have
00:11:35.59\00:11:36.96
a relationship with the Lord.
00:11:36.99\00:11:38.36
So, you know, anything goes
00:11:38.39\00:11:40.26
because if you
don't have anything
00:11:40.29\00:11:41.70
to base anything on, why not?
00:11:41.73\00:11:43.32
Just do whatever
comes along. Do whatever.
00:11:43.35\00:11:45.42
And we see so many
young girls-- they have--
00:11:45.45\00:11:48.76
what we call father hunter
00:11:48.79\00:11:50.54
and they throw
themselves into situations
00:11:50.57\00:11:53.39
that are so destructive
00:11:53.42\00:11:55.42
because they
simply haven't had that.
00:11:55.45\00:11:57.43
and so to help
provide a foundation
00:11:57.46\00:11:59.87
for young people and
say, you are valuable
00:11:59.90\00:12:02.65
and here's how you
make these decisions.
00:12:02.68\00:12:04.86
You know, here's a foundation
upon which to make decisions.
00:12:04.89\00:12:07.46
That's true. That's true.
00:12:07.49\00:12:09.51
Now it's a real privilege
for us to be in that situation,
00:12:09.54\00:12:12.88
I mean, that's such
a beautiful God thing
00:12:12.91\00:12:16.74
when he leads--
you into someone's life
00:12:16.77\00:12:19.01
and you're able to do that--
00:12:19.04\00:12:20.52
you know we're
empty nesters now,
00:12:20.55\00:12:21.92
so we've raised our daughters
00:12:21.95\00:12:23.60
and although you
never stop parenting
00:12:23.63\00:12:25.71
I've discovered that, you know--
00:12:25.74\00:12:27.11
Oh, no, we still
enjoy our daughters.
00:12:27.14\00:12:28.51
We still love them and we still
are valuable in their lives
00:12:28.54\00:12:30.94
and we're still parent.
00:12:30.97\00:12:32.35
But it's a different
level of parenting now.
00:12:32.38\00:12:34.44
But with some of
these other young women
00:12:34.47\00:12:35.97
who have not had the foundation
00:12:36.00\00:12:37.91
for us to service
of a parent substitute,
00:12:37.94\00:12:41.15
is just an
exciting thing for us.
00:12:41.18\00:12:43.19
You know, it
brings value to our lives
00:12:43.22\00:12:44.63
and we see some
growth in there as well.
00:12:44.66\00:12:46.36
So we give the
glory to Lord for that.
00:12:46.39\00:12:48.73
So I would assume that
some place along the line
00:12:48.76\00:12:52.67
these men or these women
have to expect certain things.
00:12:52.70\00:12:56.49
Now where do they--
where does this come from?
00:12:56.52\00:12:58.79
Is this something
that they have made up
00:12:58.82\00:13:00.50
that they've got
their want list or--
00:13:00.53\00:13:01.90
Well, I think in one way
00:13:01.93\00:13:03.95
we should make
a want list. Yeah.
00:13:03.98\00:13:05.99
We should make a
list of non-negotiables,
00:13:06.02\00:13:08.97
say, these are
things that are absolutes
00:13:09.00\00:13:12.84
and in the person I marry
this must be present. Right.
00:13:12.87\00:13:16.56
Some of the non-negotiables.
00:13:16.59\00:13:18.06
Well, the first
non-negotiable for me--
00:13:18.09\00:13:19.90
when I was searching for a mate,
00:13:19.93\00:13:22.55
although I didn't
really call at that,
00:13:22.58\00:13:23.95
but that's what I was doing,
00:13:23.98\00:13:25.35
I was dating
00:13:25.38\00:13:26.75
was I wanted a
committed Christian woman. Amen.
00:13:26.78\00:13:30.49
And since I'm a
Seventh-day Adventist
00:13:30.52\00:13:32.30
I wanted a Seventh-day
Adventist Christian woman.
00:13:32.33\00:13:34.87
That would uncomplicate
my life first of all,
00:13:34.90\00:13:37.52
you know, because
we wouldn't be arguing
00:13:37.55\00:13:39.37
about which day
to go to church on.
00:13:39.40\00:13:41.49
And then I wanted someone
whose level of commitment
00:13:41.52\00:13:43.93
and growth was similar to mine,
00:13:43.96\00:13:45.63
not identical,
but similar to mine.
00:13:45.66\00:13:48.53
To me that was a non-negotiable.
00:13:48.56\00:13:50.74
Because if I've to
waste a lot of time
00:13:50.77\00:13:52.90
dealing with those
issues of religious differences.
00:13:52.93\00:13:55.64
I'm wasting energy and
creative resources that I have
00:13:55.67\00:13:59.61
and I loose the
chance for some happiness
00:13:59.64\00:14:02.94
that I could have otherwise.
00:14:02.97\00:14:04.75
So when I found a woman
00:14:04.78\00:14:07.22
who was indeed a committed
Seventh-day Adventist Christian
00:14:07.25\00:14:10.77
who was in a similar
plain of growth to my own,
00:14:10.80\00:14:14.22
then the light started going off
and the bell started ringing.
00:14:14.25\00:14:17.49
You know, I
realized this could work,
00:14:17.52\00:14:19.52
this could work,
00:14:19.55\00:14:20.92
plus we found relationship
together to be so easy.
00:14:20.95\00:14:23.19
You know, it was
easy for us to get along.
00:14:23.22\00:14:26.35
It was kind of a
no effort relationship
00:14:26.38\00:14:28.26
which gave us more
resources for creativity.
00:14:28.29\00:14:30.65
But one thing
I've noticed about--
00:14:30.68\00:14:32.05
you always show
that you like each other.
00:14:32.08\00:14:33.45
Yes. Yeah.
00:14:33.48\00:14:34.85
You know, not only but I'm just,
00:14:34.88\00:14:36.25
you know, just
have paid attention,
00:14:36.28\00:14:38.31
you know, and you
just like being together.
00:14:38.34\00:14:40.27
We do. We do.
00:14:40.30\00:14:41.67
You know, and you'll
just feed off with each other
00:14:41.70\00:14:43.21
and that is
absolutely wonderful.
00:14:43.24\00:14:44.68
So I can see why
people are attracted to you
00:14:44.71\00:14:47.03
always mom and pop. Yeah.
00:14:47.06\00:14:48.73
Certainly because you
have something to give.
00:14:48.76\00:14:51.64
It just didn't happened
00:14:51.67\00:14:53.04
I'm sure that
you all have evolved
00:14:53.07\00:14:54.79
into who you are but still--
00:14:54.82\00:14:57.86
Well, I think friendship really,
00:14:57.89\00:15:00.01
you know, you can't dictate
00:15:00.04\00:15:01.82
someone else's
non-negotiables. No.
00:15:01.85\00:15:03.80
But if there was
one I was gonna dictate
00:15:03.83\00:15:06.02
that will probably
will be on the list
00:15:06.05\00:15:07.42
that you be really
good friends first.
00:15:07.45\00:15:09.89
You know, and this
has to be a friend.
00:15:09.92\00:15:12.00
Not a strange relationship.
00:15:12.03\00:15:14.91
You can talk easily.
00:15:14.94\00:15:16.31
You can enjoy one another.
00:15:16.34\00:15:17.71
You can laugh.
00:15:17.74\00:15:19.11
You know, they say, if
you survey women to ask them
00:15:19.14\00:15:22.18
what was the number one reason
00:15:22.21\00:15:23.74
why they married
their particular spouse.
00:15:23.77\00:15:27.07
The first thing on
the list they said,
00:15:27.10\00:15:28.97
he made me laugh. Amen.
00:15:29.00\00:15:30.50
It's always-- there's
joy in the relationship
00:15:30.53\00:15:32.97
and you know
what else do we want?
00:15:33.00\00:15:34.63
We don't get married so we
can solve problems together.
00:15:34.66\00:15:37.30
You know, we get married so
that we can enjoy one another
00:15:37.33\00:15:40.19
and enjoy the
journey of life together.
00:15:40.22\00:15:42.63
And there's a big
difference in happiness and joy.
00:15:42.66\00:15:44.72
That's true. Yeah.
00:15:44.75\00:15:46.12
That's true, the other thing is
00:15:46.15\00:15:47.52
I think sometimes we get hung
up on this idea of romantic love
00:15:47.55\00:15:50.77
that the media
has painted for us
00:15:50.80\00:15:52.75
and we get to
thinking that what I want is
00:15:52.78\00:15:55.94
someone who is a soul mate
00:15:55.97\00:15:57.48
who I feel this intense
passion for all the time.
00:15:57.51\00:16:01.37
I think that, that's
an unrealistic picture
00:16:01.40\00:16:03.45
and it's not even a healthy
way to build a relationship.
00:16:03.48\00:16:06.40
I believe that if you're
first and foremost good friends
00:16:06.43\00:16:10.36
who find relationship easy
00:16:10.39\00:16:12.15
and you have
common shared values
00:16:12.18\00:16:14.87
and goals and
purposes in your life,
00:16:14.90\00:16:17.38
that you have something
that's even more important
00:16:17.41\00:16:19.34
than romantic
love. Well, certainly.
00:16:19.37\00:16:21.10
In fact one author said
00:16:21.13\00:16:22.50
that in order for
genuine love to flourish
00:16:22.53\00:16:25.33
and for marriages to
last, "romantic love must die
00:16:25.36\00:16:28.92
as the basis of the relationship
00:16:28.95\00:16:31.43
and you must grow to mature love
00:16:31.46\00:16:32.90
which is a love of
commitment and friendship.
00:16:32.93\00:16:35.57
And then mature lovers
know how to use romantic love.
00:16:35.60\00:16:39.22
They're better at it
than romantic lovers are. Yes.
00:16:39.25\00:16:42.27
But it is not the
foundation of the relationship.
00:16:42.30\00:16:45.66
And so finding someone
who is their friend is key.
00:16:45.69\00:16:49.38
Shared goals, shared
vision, shared belief systems,
00:16:49.41\00:16:52.05
shared values,
00:16:52.08\00:16:53.54
we want to go to the
same direction here together.
00:16:53.57\00:16:56.42
That friend, someone
is easy to get along with
00:16:56.45\00:16:58.63
is another
non-negotiable I think. Yeah.
00:16:58.66\00:17:00.94
Often people won't overlook
00:17:00.97\00:17:02.50
the person
that's right beside them
00:17:02.53\00:17:04.53
that maybe they, they
work on a committee with
00:17:04.56\00:17:06.72
or do something at church
with and they're good friends,
00:17:06.75\00:17:09.91
they're good
buddies but they think,
00:17:09.94\00:17:11.42
oh, when I'm gonna date
I've to go out here somewhere
00:17:11.45\00:17:14.58
and find somebody
that has the right looks
00:17:14.61\00:17:17.83
or you know that
something the right--
00:17:17.86\00:17:21.20
Well, you know the standard--
00:17:21.23\00:17:22.60
basically people,
people are asking who is he?
00:17:22.63\00:17:25.55
Yeah, the status. Who is she?
00:17:25.58\00:17:26.95
The status, you know.
00:17:26.98\00:17:28.35
You know, that was the
word I was looking for.
00:17:28.38\00:17:29.75
And looking for certain
status and they pass out someone
00:17:29.78\00:17:32.08
they could be a
wonderful friend. That's right.
00:17:32.11\00:17:34.15
I had an interesting experience
over a couple of years ago.
00:17:34.18\00:17:36.98
I went to my 40th
year of school reunion.
00:17:37.01\00:17:40.56
And the guys that were
the most handsome-- Yes.
00:17:40.59\00:17:43.66
They had lost their hair.
00:17:43.69\00:17:46.37
Their beltline had expanded,
you know, put in lot of weight.
00:17:46.40\00:17:49.90
And you know when you
haven't seen your friends
00:17:49.93\00:17:51.85
that you grew up with
for years and years and years
00:17:51.88\00:17:54.16
these things happen
and it was shocking. Yeah.
00:17:54.19\00:17:57.76
And I just-- then you
start grading yourself,
00:17:57.79\00:18:00.97
you know, and then
because we forget our age.
00:18:01.00\00:18:03.30
Yeah. That's right.
00:18:03.33\00:18:04.70
They got old and how did
that happen when I didn't, yeah.
00:18:04.73\00:18:06.51
You know, what I mean.
00:18:06.54\00:18:09.08
You know the hunk
very often becomes a chunk.
00:18:09.11\00:18:10.89
That's right. That's
good. That's good. That's right.
00:18:10.92\00:18:13.20
The hunk becomes a chunk,
00:18:13.23\00:18:14.60
but it's better to
marry someone that is--
00:18:14.63\00:18:17.44
that you're basing the
relationship on looks. Yes.
00:18:17.47\00:18:20.08
You know, looks are important.
00:18:20.11\00:18:21.48
That's important for us
to take care of ourselves
00:18:21.51\00:18:23.04
so that we look
good for one another
00:18:23.07\00:18:25.04
and just for our own
self-esteem that we look good.
00:18:25.07\00:18:28.39
I think that
you have to be proud
00:18:28.42\00:18:29.79
who you're standing next to.
00:18:29.82\00:18:31.19
Right, right. Absolutely.
00:18:31.22\00:18:32.59
And I think there's a
certain level of appearance
00:18:32.62\00:18:35.05
that would be on the
non-negotiables. Yeah.
00:18:35.08\00:18:36.79
You know, I don't want someone
00:18:36.82\00:18:38.19
that just doesn't
care of themselves at all--
00:18:38.22\00:18:41.05
But it shouldn't
be number one. No.
00:18:41.08\00:18:43.06
Nor do you have to
be the most handsome guy
00:18:43.09\00:18:44.92
or the beautiful
women or whatever.
00:18:44.95\00:18:46.68
The current matinee idol
is not what I want to marry.
00:18:46.71\00:18:50.08
I want someone who
takes care of themselves
00:18:50.11\00:18:51.67
and someone who is presentable.
00:18:51.70\00:18:53.71
But what I
really want is someone
00:18:53.74\00:18:55.84
who is a person of character
and commitment and quality,
00:18:55.87\00:18:59.85
someone who shows
me tender concern,
00:18:59.88\00:19:01.46
those kinds of things.
00:19:01.49\00:19:02.86
I would assume at sometimes
00:19:02.89\00:19:04.26
you could be fooled
for a while? Oh, yes.
00:19:04.29\00:19:05.93
Sure for a while.
00:19:05.96\00:19:07.33
That's why it's usually better
not to have a quick romance
00:19:07.36\00:19:10.74
but to have some opportunity
to observe each other
00:19:10.77\00:19:13.31
in a variety of settings.
00:19:13.34\00:19:15.16
And one of the ways to do that
is spend sometime in their home
00:19:15.19\00:19:19.00
and see how they
interact with their family.
00:19:19.03\00:19:21.92
The old saying is,
if you want to know
00:19:21.95\00:19:23.41
how she's gonna treat
you 10 years from now,
00:19:23.44\00:19:25.27
watch how she
treats her daddy. Amen.
00:19:25.30\00:19:27.21
And although there
are some exceptions
00:19:27.24\00:19:28.61
to that rule especially in
unhealthy abusive relationships.
00:19:28.64\00:19:31.60
By and large that's a
pretty good rule to follow,
00:19:31.63\00:19:33.57
same thing for the ladies.
00:19:33.60\00:19:35.09
If you want to know how he's
gonna treat you in 10 years,
00:19:35.12\00:19:37.36
watch how he takes
care of his mother.
00:19:37.39\00:19:39.16
How does he treat her?
00:19:39.19\00:19:40.85
Because those home relationships
00:19:40.88\00:19:42.71
are the foundation
for or building a home.
00:19:42.74\00:19:45.25
We only know how
to do marriage one way
00:19:45.28\00:19:46.82
and that's what we
watched it done. That's right.
00:19:46.85\00:19:48.80
You know, and I think parents
can even ask these questions
00:19:48.83\00:19:51.81
of their young
people who are dating.
00:19:51.84\00:19:55.54
I remember my mother
asking me that question.
00:19:55.57\00:19:57.76
Well, what do
you think about him?
00:19:57.79\00:19:59.82
How does he treat his mother?
00:19:59.85\00:20:01.61
His mother, right.
And I'm like, well, well.
00:20:01.64\00:20:03.71
It's very perceptive for
your mom too, wouldn't it--
00:20:03.74\00:20:05.26
Yeah, and when I
thought about it,
00:20:05.29\00:20:07.26
he's treating his mother
wonderfully and his sister,
00:20:07.29\00:20:09.80
you know, always
very devoted to them,
00:20:09.83\00:20:11.81
very kind and the
way he spoke to them.
00:20:11.84\00:20:14.50
And so, you know, I knew that,
00:20:14.53\00:20:16.02
that was his
family relationship.
00:20:16.05\00:20:17.82
So I can look
forward to something similar.
00:20:17.85\00:20:20.72
And that's what Shelley told me,
00:20:20.75\00:20:22.63
the first time I took her
home to meet mom and daddy
00:20:22.66\00:20:24.87
and that changes the
rules when you take him home
00:20:24.90\00:20:27.12
to meet my mom and daddy.
That's right. Oh, yes. Yeah.
00:20:27.15\00:20:28.53
And of course we were older
00:20:28.56\00:20:29.93
whenever we had our
relationship you know
00:20:29.96\00:20:32.87
And but later she told
me that was very important
00:20:32.90\00:20:37.11
because I adore my mother.
00:20:37.14\00:20:39.02
You know, and I did
treat her with respect
00:20:39.05\00:20:40.73
and loved her with all my heart.
00:20:40.76\00:20:42.57
And that was when Shelley
00:20:42.60\00:20:43.97
probably the first
piece f armor came off of her.
00:20:44.00\00:20:46.70
You know, when ever
she says, hey, this--
00:20:46.73\00:20:48.25
You maybe safe after all.
00:20:48.28\00:20:49.65
This guy is okay, you
know, because I can see. Right.
00:20:49.68\00:20:52.68
So, that is
very, very important.
00:20:52.71\00:20:54.62
And watched how
Gayle treated her daddy.
00:20:54.65\00:20:56.67
And she just adored her
daddy, absolutely adored him.
00:20:56.70\00:21:01.09
And the bond between
them was just unbelievable.
00:21:01.12\00:21:04.87
And at first when we got married
00:21:04.90\00:21:06.92
I was a little bit
intimidated by that relationship
00:21:06.95\00:21:09.72
and then
suddenly I realized it's
00:21:09.75\00:21:11.31
because of that relationship
that she found it so easy
00:21:11.34\00:21:14.71
to have intimacy with me,
00:21:14.74\00:21:16.56
so that there was a
close relationship between us.
00:21:16.59\00:21:18.69
So I wrote her daddy a
thank you letter. Amen.
00:21:18.72\00:21:21.28
Thanking him for the ways
that he had raised his daughter
00:21:21.31\00:21:24.15
making my life with
her so easy and so rich
00:21:24.18\00:21:28.17
and so that I owed him a great
deal because of his fathering.
00:21:28.20\00:21:31.56
I think that's a keeper.
00:21:31.59\00:21:32.96
I think that's something that
a lot of young men out there
00:21:32.99\00:21:35.20
ought to follow that because
that's a keeper right there.
00:21:35.23\00:21:38.49
It meant so much to him.
00:21:38.52\00:21:40.36
He kept that letter, he had
it tugged away in his drawer
00:21:40.39\00:21:43.16
and every now and
then he'd show me.
00:21:43.19\00:21:44.56
You know, when you wrote to me.
00:21:44.59\00:21:45.96
Yeah. That's precious.
00:21:45.99\00:21:47.36
But I think that we also
look for other non-negotiables.
00:21:47.39\00:21:50.17
Some of them should
be pretty obvious to us,
00:21:50.20\00:21:52.90
but not always, so
let's take the obvious.
00:21:52.93\00:21:55.96
You don't want
someone who is abusive,
00:21:55.99\00:21:58.79
verbally, physically,
emotionally or spiritually.
00:21:58.82\00:22:02.04
And that
sometimes can be observed
00:22:02.07\00:22:03.63
in those relationships
that we were just speaking.
00:22:03.66\00:22:05.46
That's right.
00:22:05.49\00:22:06.86
So be around their
family, you know. Yeah.
00:22:06.89\00:22:08.31
If they scream and shout
00:22:08.34\00:22:09.71
or verbally
abusive to their parents,
00:22:09.74\00:22:11.75
this is a bad sign.
00:22:11.78\00:22:13.32
Or if you watch their
parent do that to each other
00:22:13.35\00:22:16.85
this is where--this
individual has learned things
00:22:16.88\00:22:19.49
and so at least keep
an eye open for this,
00:22:19.52\00:22:21.58
it doesn't mean that
person will necessarily
00:22:21.61\00:22:23.70
have to repeat the pattern
00:22:23.73\00:22:25.22
that they learned in
their home of origin,
00:22:25.25\00:22:27.13
but there is a better
than even chance that they will
00:22:27.16\00:22:29.87
and so it's good to
watch that to observe it.
00:22:29.90\00:22:31.95
Is there abuse?
00:22:31.98\00:22:33.35
Is there controlling
behavior going on here?
00:22:33.38\00:22:36.58
Is there deceit?
Is this person honest?
00:22:36.61\00:22:39.83
Can I trust what they say?
00:22:39.86\00:22:41.27
When they tell me one
thing, is it always true
00:22:41.30\00:22:43.60
or do I find out there's
something else is true later?
00:22:43.63\00:22:47.83
Are they physically violent?
00:22:47.86\00:22:50.55
Have they ever hit me?
00:22:50.58\00:22:52.17
If they do, don't walk,
run from this relationship.
00:22:52.20\00:22:55.12
Get out, get out now.
00:22:55.15\00:22:57.40
We've been married 31 years.
00:22:57.43\00:22:58.80
I want you to know something.
00:22:58.83\00:23:00.20
I had never even thought
of hitting this woman. Amen.
00:23:00.23\00:23:02.19
But if I did, I'd be out
on the street the next day,
00:23:02.22\00:23:05.86
until I got help. Yes.
00:23:05.89\00:23:07.94
She would say, all
right, this marriage isn't over,
00:23:07.97\00:23:09.58
but you're out of this
house until you get help.
00:23:09.61\00:23:11.54
Now 31 years of
marriage I thought,
00:23:11.57\00:23:12.94
you know, would win
some brownie points,
00:23:12.97\00:23:15.57
but one hit would do
it and I know that. Yeah.
00:23:15.60\00:23:18.05
And I respect her for
that. That's as it should be.
00:23:18.08\00:23:20.89
And that's a non-negotiable.
It is a non-negotiable. Yes.
00:23:20.92\00:23:23.58
And it will always
be a non-negotiable.
00:23:23.61\00:23:26.82
Another non-negotiable
would be alcohol abuse,
00:23:26.85\00:23:29.53
a drug use,
those kinds of things.
00:23:29.56\00:23:33.13
Simply because it
affects emotional maturity.
00:23:33.16\00:23:35.77
It affects judgment.
00:23:35.80\00:23:37.52
It is contrary to
the value system of those
00:23:37.55\00:23:40.05
who follow the
Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
00:23:40.08\00:23:42.43
It becomes another lover.
00:23:42.46\00:23:44.42
I really believe that
you can adulterate a marriage
00:23:44.45\00:23:46.79
by addictions to
substances being--
00:23:46.82\00:23:50.34
and even that in
pornography and other issues.
00:23:50.37\00:23:52.97
Addictions becomes another lover
00:23:53.00\00:23:55.19
and I've seen men and women both
00:23:55.22\00:23:57.69
really leave a beautiful home,
00:23:57.72\00:24:00.00
a wonderful spouse,
because of addicted behavior.
00:24:00.03\00:24:04.10
And then addicted behavior
00:24:04.13\00:24:05.59
also leaves a person
emotionally immature.
00:24:05.62\00:24:09.56
And you know, it's all right to
be emotionally 16 if you are 16,
00:24:09.59\00:24:12.51
but when you're
38 it really stinks.
00:24:12.54\00:24:14.42
Yeah, because I
understand you know that
00:24:14.45\00:24:16.75
if you start using drugs
00:24:16.78\00:24:18.63
whatever then you
take home that particular--
00:24:18.66\00:24:21.36
That's where your
emotional development stops.
00:24:21.39\00:24:23.35
If you start using at age 16,
00:24:23.38\00:24:25.53
you were 16 until
the day you stop using
00:24:25.56\00:24:28.33
and then you don't
suddenly jump to 38 or 39.
00:24:28.36\00:24:31.67
It's still a
process. You got to grow.
00:24:31.70\00:24:33.74
Now you maybe able
with right up to grow
00:24:33.77\00:24:35.70
faster than a year per year,
00:24:35.73\00:24:38.80
but still it is
a growth process.
00:24:38.83\00:24:40.93
And the emotions
have to be nurtured along.
00:24:40.96\00:24:43.65
But if you were selecting a mate
00:24:43.68\00:24:45.06
that would certainly be
one or two would say next.
00:24:45.09\00:24:48.09
Yes, that's right.
00:24:48.12\00:24:49.49
And there are
other things, you know,
00:24:49.52\00:24:50.89
you want to look at the
person's work ethics. Yes.
00:24:50.92\00:24:52.44
And that's what he thinks,
00:24:52.47\00:24:53.84
you know, you want
someone who will be a worker.
00:24:53.87\00:24:57.48
You know, especially for a
husband you want to know that
00:24:57.51\00:25:00.44
he's going to hold the job.
00:25:00.47\00:25:02.40
For a wife you
know you want to know
00:25:02.43\00:25:04.18
that she's gonna be willing to
contribute as well and to be--
00:25:04.21\00:25:08.28
to have the best of for
her family in mind. Right.
00:25:08.31\00:25:12.18
And just, you know, all
of those things line up,
00:25:12.21\00:25:15.18
but you have to make your list
00:25:15.21\00:25:17.20
of
non-negotiables. That's right.
00:25:17.23\00:25:18.60
What is it for you that
is absolutely has to be there
00:25:18.63\00:25:22.36
or absolutely cannot be there.
00:25:22.39\00:25:24.72
And I would imagine if somebody
who is 60 years or 70 years old,
00:25:24.75\00:25:27.98
they probably need
to have their list too.
00:25:28.01\00:25:29.77
Absolutely. The list has
got to be there. You see.
00:25:29.80\00:25:31.59
Some people will say,
well, that's judgmental.
00:25:31.62\00:25:33.94
No, it's not judgmental,
00:25:33.97\00:25:35.45
it's setting a
course for your life. Yes.
00:25:35.48\00:25:37.77
It's knowing what you
want, knowing who you are,
00:25:37.80\00:25:40.69
knowing where
you're going and deciding
00:25:40.72\00:25:43.03
if I'm going to get there
00:25:43.06\00:25:44.43
and I'm going to
have someone along with me
00:25:44.46\00:25:46.56
there need to be someone who
can contribute to this process.
00:25:46.59\00:25:49.74
So you have to
know what you want
00:25:49.77\00:25:51.68
and when you date
someone who you suddenly possess
00:25:51.71\00:25:55.02
a non-negotiable--
00:25:55.05\00:25:56.42
something you cannot
have in this relationship,
00:25:56.45\00:25:58.68
end the
relationship and move on. Yes.
00:25:58.71\00:26:01.69
We're running out of time,
00:26:01.72\00:26:03.09
we've got
approximately two minutes left.
00:26:03.12\00:26:05.05
Why don't we just sum up
what we've talked about here
00:26:05.08\00:26:07.34
because this is a wonderful
topic, mate selection. Right.
00:26:07.37\00:26:11.79
And it starts with you
and God following His timing,
00:26:11.82\00:26:15.00
His will and also
then developing yourself,
00:26:15.03\00:26:18.69
making sure that
you've taken care
00:26:18.72\00:26:20.40
of your relationship
with God and your love issues
00:26:20.43\00:26:23.65
and then knowing who you
are and where you're going. Yes.
00:26:23.68\00:26:26.16
What are your non-negotiables?
00:26:26.19\00:26:27.98
What are the things I absolutely
have to have in a mate?
00:26:28.01\00:26:30.88
And then not settling for less.
00:26:30.91\00:26:32.45
It would be better to be single
than to compromise your values
00:26:32.48\00:26:36.30
and marry
someone who does not fit
00:26:36.33\00:26:38.22
what you need in
your life for a mate. Yes.
00:26:38.25\00:26:41.28
And I think the last
thing is just to trust that
00:26:41.31\00:26:43.55
God is capable. Yes.
00:26:43.58\00:26:45.20
That as you
continue to grow in Him,
00:26:45.23\00:26:47.43
He can put you
in the right place
00:26:47.46\00:26:49.35
and your potential
mate in the right place
00:26:49.38\00:26:51.40
at the right time. Trust Him.
00:26:51.43\00:26:53.12
So you really
don't want to lag behind,
00:26:53.15\00:26:55.10
you don't want to be
ahead. That's right. Absolutely.
00:26:55.13\00:26:57.23
You know, you want
to be in His timing
00:26:57.26\00:26:58.63
and so I know in my
particular situation
00:26:58.66\00:27:00.76
I invite the Holy
Spirit in daily. Yes.
00:27:00.79\00:27:02.80
You know, sometime hourly.
00:27:02.83\00:27:04.92
You know-- so
that I know that my God
00:27:04.95\00:27:07.14
who could see the
beginning from the end is there,
00:27:07.17\00:27:09.05
you know, to be
that flashlight out
00:27:09.08\00:27:12.67
in front of me you
might say, you know, so--
00:27:12.70\00:27:15.08
The one thing you
want us to be in His timing
00:27:15.11\00:27:16.86
and in His will. Amen, amen.
00:27:16.89\00:27:20.37
Ladies and gentlemen,
this has been an absolutely
00:27:20.40\00:27:22.41
wonderful,
wonderful topic today.
00:27:22.44\00:27:25.80
We're talking
with two people here
00:27:25.83\00:27:27.65
that certainly
have walk the talk,
00:27:27.68\00:27:32.12
walk the walk and talk the talk
00:27:32.15\00:27:33.78
I guess that's the way
it's put in everything.
00:27:33.81\00:27:35.60
Anyway we're glad you are here.
00:27:35.63\00:27:37.64
We are going to go to
another topic after this
00:27:37.67\00:27:42.17
and it's dealing
with communication.
00:27:42.20\00:27:43.96
So I'm sure that
every one would like to know
00:27:43.99\00:27:45.82
more about how to
communicate with each other.
00:27:45.85\00:27:48.73
We just want to
thank you or being with us
00:27:48.76\00:27:50.61
today on "Issues and Answers."
00:27:50.64\00:27:52.33
We just ask that God bless you,
00:27:52.36\00:27:53.94
take care of you and guide
you according to your faith.
00:27:53.97\00:27:57.70