Hello, I'm J. D. Quinn.
We're with you today with
00:00:30.53\00:00:34.74
Issues and Answers
00:00:34.75\00:00:35.72
I have a special guest. Her name
00:00:35.73\00:00:38.14
is Celeste Lee. But before we
talk to Celeste, I want to bring
00:00:38.18\00:00:42.39
out a scripture.
2 Chronicles 16:9.
00:00:42.42\00:00:47.45
This is one of my favorites
because it fits all situations
00:00:47.49\00:00:51.03
and all occasions but
it's especially going to fit
00:00:51.06\00:00:53.30
Celeste's situation today.
For the eyes of the Lord run
00:00:53.34\00:00:58.19
to and fro throughout the whole
earth to show himself strong on
00:00:58.23\00:01:03.11
behalf of those whose heart
is loyal to him. As we progress
00:01:03.15\00:01:07.33
into this story, you're going
to see how Celeste's heart has
00:01:07.37\00:01:12.22
always been strong to the Lord
and how in the end he has always
00:01:12.26\00:01:17.08
been loyal to her. She just
didn't realize it until later
00:01:17.11\00:01:20.92
rather than earlier. Celeste,
how are you doing today?
00:01:20.96\00:01:24.74
I'm fine thank you.
00:01:24.77\00:01:26.32
It's wonderful to see you. Now
I know that you're from Nebraska
00:01:26.36\00:01:30.03
and I know a few things about
you but let's start off when you
00:01:30.07\00:01:33.71
were young. Where did
Celeste get her start in life?
00:01:33.74\00:01:37.58
I was born and raised in South
00:01:37.61\00:01:40.64
Dakota in a Christian family and
00:01:40.68\00:01:43.68
I went to Christian schools
00:01:43.71\00:01:46.51
growing up. I had a very good
00:01:46.54\00:01:49.27
family life. I was brought
up that it is very important how
00:01:49.31\00:01:54.89
we look, the appearance that
we give, that anything that is
00:01:54.93\00:02:00.27
going on in the home is kept
in the home, that God is very
00:02:00.30\00:02:04.94
concerned about every little
move we're making and he's
00:02:04.98\00:02:09.55
always like that song says,
Oh be careful hands what you do,
00:02:09.59\00:02:14.03
Oh be careful little feet where
you go, for the father up above
00:02:14.07\00:02:18.48
is looking down in love.
And that's kind of some of the
00:02:18.51\00:02:22.73
things I was
brought up with, that idea.
00:02:22.76\00:02:25.24
Okay, so do you think that you
had a relationship with the Lord
00:02:25.28\00:02:29.41
when you were young or
did that develop later?
00:02:29.44\00:02:34.10
I would think that that
developed a little later.
00:02:34.14\00:02:38.73
My idea of a relationship with
the Lord was just behavior, was
00:02:38.77\00:02:43.16
how was I behaving, you know,
was I being good enough, was I
00:02:43.19\00:02:47.23
accepted, was he going to reject
me because I hadn't made every
00:02:47.26\00:02:51.27
little move right? Did I look
the way he wanted me to, you
00:02:51.30\00:02:55.38
know, all of those things that
came from some of the things in
00:02:55.41\00:02:59.44
my family background a little
bit. But I think it was really
00:02:59.48\00:03:03.05
when I was older that I really
developed that relationship with
00:03:03.09\00:03:06.63
God even though I had
been around Christianity.
00:03:06.66\00:03:09.80
We're going to be talking today
about anger. Now you certainly
00:03:09.84\00:03:15.88
in looking at Celeste, you'd
wonder how in the world does
00:03:15.91\00:03:19.06
anger play a part in your life.
Well, not only anger but we're
00:03:19.10\00:03:25.21
going to go to the 360 degrees
away and rage. Now I know that
00:03:25.24\00:03:31.08
you are married to Ron. Now tell
us a little something about Ron.
00:03:31.11\00:03:37.20
My husband is an, was, I need
to say, an absolute rage-aholic.
00:03:37.23\00:03:43.29
I lived approximately 26,
27 years of my life not ever
00:03:43.32\00:03:48.51
knowing when he was going to go
off or whatever he would go off
00:03:48.55\00:03:52.58
on; like constantly walking
on egg shells. When he came home
00:03:52.62\00:03:55.92
was he going to come in
that door in a good mood, was he
00:03:55.96\00:03:59.46
going to come in that door
furious and never knowing why,
00:03:59.50\00:04:02.93
but always having the feeling
that I was responsible for it in
00:04:02.97\00:04:07.10
some way, even though he could
be mad at what happened in his
00:04:07.13\00:04:10.95
day when I wasn't around. But
the fact that he was mad I was
00:04:10.99\00:04:14.78
still responsible for it
and trying to always make sure
00:04:14.81\00:04:17.82
that everything was okay and
never knowing where it was going
00:04:17.86\00:04:22.00
come from or be manifested.
So I was always living in this
00:04:22.03\00:04:26.14
uncertainty and
what was going on.
00:04:26.17\00:04:28.34
I think that you said earlier
that your role in life as you
00:04:28.38\00:04:31.84
were brought up was to be the
nice, quiet, little, Christian
00:04:31.87\00:04:35.95
lady. So here you were hiding
behind this veil, you might say,
00:04:35.99\00:04:39.73
of not letting the outside know
what was going on on the inside
00:04:39.77\00:04:43.48
of your home.
Exactly, and always putting on
00:04:43.51\00:04:46.97
the front that everything is
okay no matter what's going on
00:04:47.01\00:04:51.11
being totally codependent in the
fact of always making an excuse
00:04:51.15\00:04:56.66
for him, you know, always
covering up for him, all of
00:04:56.69\00:04:59.17
those things. I remember the one
day we were going to church and
00:04:59.21\00:05:06.54
you know Satan really loves to
start something when you're on
00:05:06.57\00:05:11.95
your way to church, that's for
sure. We were going to church
00:05:11.99\00:05:17.07
and I was driving and Ron
was just having one of his spit
00:05:17.10\00:05:21.57
spats at me and I just looked
over at him and I thought, I am
00:05:21.61\00:05:25.56
sick and tired of listening to
you just flap you jaw at me and
00:05:25.60\00:05:29.50
I just reached over and slapped
him. I had never raised my hand
00:05:29.54\00:05:33.33
to him and he has never raised
his hand to me. But he turned
00:05:33.37\00:05:37.46
around and slugged me in the
jaw. That was the first time and
00:05:37.49\00:05:41.43
the only time that he ever did
that. And I was just so shocked
00:05:41.47\00:05:45.34
that I pulled the car over and
he just took that keys and got
00:05:45.37\00:05:49.21
out and walked off. Some
car stopped and he got in and he
00:05:49.25\00:05:53.02
went home and I was just sitting
in the car. I thought, well I
00:05:53.06\00:05:55.68
know there's going to be other
people going to church that will
00:05:55.72\00:05:59.57
come along and see me and sure
enough they did. I went through
00:05:59.61\00:06:03.43
church service, all the way
through a potluck and singing
00:06:03.46\00:06:07.28
band with everyone saying to
me, hi, how are you today and I
00:06:07.31\00:06:11.72
went fine. I never shed a tear,
I never told anyone. I went
00:06:11.75\00:06:16.13
through that whole day
like nothing in the world had
00:06:16.16\00:06:20.41
happened. Do you
feel like a lot of people
00:06:20.44\00:06:22.45
live under that same umbrella?
00:06:22.48\00:06:24.55
Oh, I'm sure there are a lot
of people who do that. It was
00:06:24.59\00:06:28.93
just totally not acceptable
for me to show that anything had
00:06:28.97\00:06:33.37
happened. It wasn't until later
that night when I was taking a
00:06:33.40\00:06:37.66
bath that I finally cried, the
first time I showed any emotion
00:06:37.69\00:06:42.15
about that. That is how shut
down I had become emotionally
00:06:42.19\00:06:46.62
from living like this.
00:06:46.65\00:06:49.24
Let's back up a little bit now.
Did you realize this about Ron
00:06:49.28\00:06:54.25
when you married him?
00:06:54.28\00:06:55.59
I would have to say I did
somewhat, but I always thought
00:06:55.63\00:07:00.65
Oh, you know, I can fix this.
It'll be okay. If he's around me
00:07:00.69\00:07:06.62
and everything is nice, it'll be
all right. You know, as women we
00:07:06.65\00:07:12.55
tend to do that a lot.
00:07:12.58\00:07:13.74
I think that's an issue that a
lot of people face, that I love
00:07:13.78\00:07:18.11
them, my heart belongs to them
and I know that I can make some
00:07:18.15\00:07:22.30
changes for them in their life.
But the older I get, I find out
00:07:22.33\00:07:26.45
that is as false as can be.
Getting married is the second
00:07:26.48\00:07:30.54
most important decision that
we'll ever make. The first one
00:07:30.58\00:07:34.57
of course, is to choose to serve
Jesus Christ. The second one is
00:07:34.61\00:07:37.90
who you're going to spend your
life with and you certainly have
00:07:37.94\00:07:41.20
to be equally yoked and so
many people out there are not.
00:07:41.23\00:07:44.84
My goodness, I don't think that
anyone would have any idea that
00:07:44.88\00:07:49.85
the future development of your
relationship would just be so
00:07:49.89\00:07:54.83
extreme. Exactly.
I think one of the
00:07:54.86\00:07:57.82
things that I have learned in
the last couple of years since
00:07:57.86\00:08:02.82
we have really gone and got what
I call some tools so that we
00:08:02.86\00:08:06.94
know how to deal with these
things is that the only person
00:08:06.98\00:08:11.13
I can change is myself and in
changing myself then the other
00:08:11.16\00:08:15.13
person has a choice to step
up to the plate with that or to
00:08:15.16\00:08:19.37
not. Where I spent to many years
of my life was trying to fix
00:08:19.40\00:08:22.97
everyone else and make it okay
for them and I can only make
00:08:23.01\00:08:26.10
choices for myself. That doesn't
mean I don't care about that
00:08:26.13\00:08:31.01
person. I also remember the
time that my husband met Sheree
00:08:31.05\00:08:36.04
Peters. She looked at him and
she said why aren't you doing
00:08:36.08\00:08:40.68
prison ministry? And he said,
because I can't go in there.
00:08:40.72\00:08:45.02
I'm afraid of what I might do.
And that was a short exchange
00:08:45.06\00:08:49.08
and the next morning I picked
her up, she had come to do a
00:08:49.12\00:08:53.07
women's conference for me, and
I picked her up to take her back
00:08:53.11\00:08:55.91
to the airport and she got in
the car and she goes, Well boy
00:08:55.94\00:08:58.71
your husband sure is a
rage-aholic. That was the first
00:08:58.74\00:09:02.19
time I had ever heard someone
put words to it and I cannot
00:09:02.22\00:09:06.80
tell you what an eye-opening
event that was for me to know
00:09:06.84\00:09:11.35
that there was a name for that
and that I wasn't just imagining
00:09:11.39\00:09:14.99
because you begin to imagine
in your mind that you're only
00:09:15.02\00:09:18.53
dreaming this up. This isn't
really what's happening and you
00:09:18.56\00:09:22.04
start to live in that
false world of something must be
00:09:22.07\00:09:25.73
wrong with me and not
what's reality and what's really
00:09:25.76\00:09:29.35
happening. So that was really an
eye-opening experience for me to
00:09:29.39\00:09:35.75
realize that and then to begin
to take steps from there to
00:09:35.78\00:09:40.79
learn more about why I would
subject myself to that and why
00:09:40.82\00:09:45.80
he was that type of person.
00:09:45.83\00:09:47.62
Now in your perception, here you
are under this Ron umbrella, and
00:09:47.66\00:09:53.06
I love the Lord, I was brought
up in the Lord but I was taught
00:09:53.10\00:09:57.87
to keep my mouth shut. Now here
on the opposite side is Ron; now
00:09:57.91\00:10:02.65
what was his perception?
Was he brought up in the church?
00:10:02.68\00:10:07.03
He was raised in a Christian
family as well and it was an
00:10:07.06\00:10:11.17
abusive family. His father
beat him and his mother is very
00:10:11.21\00:10:15.79
abusive. So he just got to the
point where if this is what God
00:10:15.83\00:10:19.82
is about, I don't want anything
to do with it, so he walked away
00:10:19.85\00:10:23.81
from all of that for about
25 years. I stayed in the church
00:10:23.84\00:10:30.40
and I had my struggles. I do
have to say about the time that
00:10:30.44\00:10:36.42
Sheree said that, I was to the
point where I can remember where
00:10:36.46\00:10:41.46
I sat in study that I was like
God, I'm going to have to choose
00:10:41.49\00:10:46.59
between really believing in you
and not, because I've prayed and
00:10:46.63\00:10:51.70
prayed for years about
the situation and nothing is
00:10:51.73\00:10:54.66
changing. So I can't stay in
this relationship with you if
00:10:54.70\00:10:59.55
nothing changes, because
it's not true, it's not really a
00:10:59.58\00:11:05.06
reality and I was really
struggling with that when we
00:11:05.09\00:11:10.50
got some information that
just really helped us understand
00:11:10.54\00:11:13.56
where we both had come from,
what had been set up in our
00:11:13.59\00:11:17.85
lives to develop these scenarios
in us and how we basically
00:11:17.89\00:11:21.81
matched each other. You know,
I'd always been the one that
00:11:21.84\00:11:26.40
everyone would look at and
say, oh, Celeste is just a fine,
00:11:26.43\00:11:30.92
sweet girl and what is she doing
married to that Ron that just is
00:11:30.96\00:11:35.13
so insane. I remember going
to a recovery seminar and the
00:11:35.16\00:11:41.53
people presenting that said that
you marry your emotional equal.
00:11:41.57\00:11:46.21
I was like livid, one of the few
times I had an emotion, because
00:11:46.25\00:11:50.86
there was no way I could
be like my husband. They were
00:11:50.89\00:11:53.90
telling me I was as damaged
as my husband and that was just
00:11:53.94\00:11:57.32
absolutely insane for me. But
in my ways I was, but they were
00:11:57.36\00:12:00.71
just totally different ways.
00:12:00.74\00:12:02.44
So that was your next step. I
mean now your coequals you might
00:12:02.48\00:12:08.08
say. What happened?
00:12:08.11\00:12:10.94
Really getting information
on how those things in our early
00:12:10.98\00:12:16.30
childhood shaped the way we
think and see things and working
00:12:16.33\00:12:21.47
with that with God's word
and his help to have a healthy
00:12:21.51\00:12:26.62
relationship. So both
of you were emotionally
00:12:26.65\00:12:31.26
damaged?
Absolutely. I think everyone on
00:12:31.29\00:12:33.31
the planet is really because
Satan has an agenda. He doesn't
00:12:33.35\00:12:37.65
want anybody to go through life
totally healthy and he's going
00:12:37.68\00:12:41.95
to do what he
can to set that up.
00:12:41.98\00:12:43.42
Okay, so now you met with Sheree
At least you found out that
00:12:43.46\00:12:49.15
there is a definition. So now
what do you do next and how does
00:12:49.18\00:12:53.98
Ron fit into this? You've come
to a fork in the road. You're
00:12:54.02\00:12:57.83
sitting here saying boy Lord I
just can't take this any longer.
00:12:57.87\00:13:01.65
I know that you have a plan
for our life. I know that I've
00:13:01.68\00:13:04.98
always wanted to be in ministry.
But I'm beginning to get a
00:13:05.02\00:13:07.78
little concerned whether this
is really going to come into
00:13:07.81\00:13:10.54
fruition or not. I
was so frustrated that
00:13:10.57\00:13:18.07
unbeknownst to my husband I
had rented a storage unit. I was
00:13:18.11\00:13:22.62
moving things out and I actually
had a day and time picked when
00:13:22.65\00:13:26.24
he was going to be out of town
working for a couple of days.
00:13:26.27\00:13:30.10
I had gone through my house and
written in a little notebook in
00:13:30.14\00:13:34.03
each room everything I was
going to take and I was ready to
00:13:34.07\00:13:38.40
leave. Well, the day that he was
to be out of town he came home
00:13:38.43\00:13:42.73
and I remember just being
devastated. I was like crushed
00:13:42.76\00:13:46.68
and I was like crying to God,
why are you doing this to me?
00:13:46.71\00:13:50.61
What's going on? As much as
I hurt and as much as I didn't
00:13:50.64\00:13:57.24
want to stay I knew without a
doubt God said stay. There was
00:13:57.27\00:14:02.28
no way I could doubt that. As
much as I was depressed, I was
00:14:02.32\00:14:07.07
upset because I had finally made
that decision to leave and not
00:14:07.11\00:14:12.06
live like this anymore and God
said, No, stay. So then I did
00:14:12.10\00:14:16.25
put him in the crisis. I did say
you know I'm going to leave if
00:14:16.28\00:14:21.32
you don't do something. So we
went together to Ron and Nancy
00:14:21.35\00:14:25.56
Rockey's program called Binding
the Wounds. Just really learning
00:14:25.60\00:14:29.78
about how to bind those
childhood wounds that Satan had
00:14:29.81\00:14:33.65
set up. You know, our parents
didn't do anything. They're not
00:14:33.69\00:14:38.48
bad parents. They only lived
out the best that they had.
00:14:38.51\00:14:43.53
And that's really important,
because it's not about dumping
00:14:43.57\00:14:48.52
on anyone. It's about Satan does
not want us in the image of God.
00:14:48.56\00:14:52.65
And he's going to do everything
he can to stop that. If he could
00:14:52.69\00:14:56.75
have destroyed our marriage,
there is no way we would be
00:14:56.78\00:15:00.10
doing what we're doing today,
touching lives. I am passionate
00:15:00.14\00:15:04.14
about reaching out to a woman
who is suffering under any kind
00:15:04.17\00:15:07.95
of abuse whether it's physical
or emotional. You know, there
00:15:07.98\00:15:12.33
were times, because Ron was very
verbally abusive with his rage,
00:15:12.37\00:15:16.69
there times that I would
actually wish that he would hit
00:15:16.72\00:15:21.02
me because then I would have
proof of what was happening.
00:15:21.05\00:15:25.94
I could walk out the door and
say see. Where if it's verbal
00:15:25.98\00:15:30.10
the door can open and there can
be a smile and no one will ever
00:15:30.13\00:15:34.24
believe what's happening. So I'm
really passionate to reach out
00:15:34.27\00:15:38.35
to women that I know are
struggling with some of those
00:15:38.38\00:15:41.35
same things. God sets that up so
cool. He's so awesome in how he
00:15:41.39\00:15:45.43
puts people in our paths that
we can reach out and encourage.
00:15:45.47\00:15:49.48
Well it's like the
text 2 Chronicles 16:9.
00:15:49.51\00:15:53.16
For the eyes of the Lord are
going to and fro to be there for
00:15:53.20\00:15:57.18
the benefit of the ones that
00:15:57.21\00:15:59.51
need help. So you know he
had his eye on you all the time.
00:15:59.55\00:16:03.07
He had his eyes on Ron all the
time, because this certainly is
00:16:03.10\00:16:07.41
a supernatural timing that Ron
showed up that day when you were
00:16:07.45\00:16:11.73
prepared to go a different
direction. So now you have
00:16:11.76\00:16:15.14
children? We have one daughter.
00:16:15.17\00:16:17.67
Okay, how has this affected her?
00:16:17.71\00:16:20.18
Um, that's probably the part
00:16:20.21\00:16:22.92
that hurts. You can take a lot
00:16:22.95\00:16:25.98
abuse yourself, but when you see
00:16:26.01\00:16:28.97
your child in an environment
that you know is not the best
00:16:29.01\00:16:33.03
that's really hard. Now that we
have changed a lot we still see
00:16:33.07\00:16:38.21
some of those effects that we
know that our damage caused in
00:16:38.25\00:16:43.10
her even though just like I
mentioned, it was certainly not
00:16:43.14\00:16:48.36
intentional. We did not do
that intentionally. But she's
00:16:48.40\00:16:53.59
watching us and growing.
00:16:53.62\00:16:55.18
Well you know the Bible
is certainly clear on the
00:16:55.22\00:16:57.50
generational sins. So it seems
like especially in Ron's case
00:16:57.54\00:17:02.00
his father was dysfunctional,
Ron was dysfunctional so you
00:17:02.04\00:17:06.43
just hope that Psalms 129:4 says
Cut the cord of the wicked, you
00:17:06.47\00:17:12.32
know, so that you'll break
that generational sin. So from a
00:17:12.35\00:17:19.23
ministry standpoint what is
your ministry? I know from our
00:17:19.27\00:17:24.62
conversation earlier that
you and Ron have a ministry now,
00:17:24.65\00:17:29.84
but before I go there, when did
Ron make a change in his life
00:17:29.87\00:17:34.35
and how did that affect you?
Then we'll go into the ministry.
00:17:34.38\00:17:38.86
When we actually went to the two
day Binding the Wounds program
00:17:38.89\00:17:43.36
when we went to that, the second
halfway through that he walked
00:17:43.40\00:17:47.73
out and he turned to me and he
said, (we were going to lunch,
00:17:47.76\00:17:51.25
he didn't walk out and leave)
and he turned to me and he said,
00:17:51.28\00:17:55.30
I feel like I'm walking on Air
Jordan's times 10. He goes, I
00:17:55.33\00:17:59.36
finally understand why I
have been angry all these years.
00:17:59.39\00:18:03.35
He had no understanding of that
before and simply understanding
00:18:03.39\00:18:07.51
that gives you so much power
to make a change and that was
00:18:07.54\00:18:13.82
incredible for us. He was so
filled with anger that when we
00:18:13.86\00:18:20.07
went to that seminar, Ron Rockey
leaned over to his wife and said
00:18:20.11\00:18:24.73
this guy won't last a half
an hour. So the next time we
00:18:24.76\00:18:28.33
went back he told us, he
said, I have to tell you guys
00:18:28.37\00:18:31.87
something and he told us that he
had said that. He said the Lord
00:18:31.91\00:18:35.43
just proves me wrong again, but
I did not give him even a half
00:18:35.46\00:18:38.95
an hour to sit in here.
00:18:38.98\00:18:40.09
This must be an intensive
counseling session. I mean if
00:18:40.13\00:18:44.77
it's two days and I'm just
guessing Ron might have been 40
00:18:44.81\00:18:49.44
years old at this particular
time. So I mean he has 40 years
00:18:49.48\00:18:52.69
old at this particular time. So
he has 40 years of becoming who
00:18:52.72\00:18:55.90
he is. Closer to 50, I think.
00:18:55.93\00:18:58.31
Okay 50 years. This is who
he was because we become what we
00:18:58.35\00:19:02.99
behold. So now you're saying in
two days. So the Holy Spirit had
00:19:03.03\00:19:07.57
to be present there. First of
all that Ron became vulnerable
00:19:07.61\00:19:11.46
enough so that he allowed the
Holy Spirit to come in and make
00:19:11.49\00:19:15.59
some changes in his life. Now
as you're sitting there going
00:19:15.63\00:19:20.05
through this counseling session
did you have glimmers of hope?
00:19:20.08\00:19:23.64
Did you begin to see some
changes there or did the changes
00:19:23.67\00:19:27.20
come later?
Simply the fact that he
00:19:27.23\00:19:30.46
recognized was a huge glimmer
of hope and I was struggling
00:19:30.50\00:19:35.15
personally because going back
to the idea that I had always
00:19:35.18\00:19:39.27
been in the church, I had always
been the "good" one because I
00:19:39.31\00:19:43.00
didn't have anything on the
outside that people looked at.
00:19:43.04\00:19:46.57
I think that's really important
because God wants our hearts
00:19:46.61\00:19:50.11
and if our heart is fill
of deceitfulness and envy and
00:19:50.14\00:19:54.51
bitterness. You know we're angry
at someone even though it's
00:19:54.55\00:19:59.43
hidden in our heart, where Ron
just wore his on his sleeve so
00:19:59.47\00:20:03.41
everybody in the world knew it
and I hid everything. So I was
00:20:03.45\00:20:08.11
having to face that about myself
and it wasn't an instantaneous
00:20:08.14\00:20:13.69
scenario although we did learn
enough in those two days to say
00:20:13.73\00:20:19.25
this is something we can
do. There is hope here. We can
00:20:19.28\00:20:21.85
follow this path. It's still a
growth for me. Even in the last
00:20:21.89\00:20:27.06
week or two there are times when
I will not want to say something
00:20:27.09\00:20:32.23
to Ron because I'm afraid he's
going to go off in a rage and
00:20:32.26\00:20:36.95
I'm like no it's okay. I can say
this and so I will step up to
00:20:36.99\00:20:41.65
the plate and for me that's
a huge step to open myself up
00:20:41.68\00:20:46.95
because I live behind walls
so deep. But to open myself
00:20:46.98\00:20:52.18
up and say no this is what I see
this is what I feel, that's just
00:20:52.22\00:20:57.26
huge and that's still a growth
process of day by day learning
00:20:57.30\00:21:03.39
to trust more, learning to
take that chance. And taking the
00:21:03.42\00:21:08.78
chance is awesome because 9
times out of 10 it works out.
00:21:08.81\00:21:14.10
Sure there are those times but
it's so much better than living
00:21:14.14\00:21:17.19
behind the
walls, so much better.
00:21:17.22\00:21:19.75
So now three years have gone
by. Where are you standing now?
00:21:19.79\00:21:26.31
I understand you're coming up
here the last three or four days
00:21:26.35\00:21:31.53
you know you're still battling
these things but from God being
00:21:31.56\00:21:36.53
the center or the focal point
of your life is it different?
00:21:36.57\00:21:42.29
It's totally different and for
me it's learning to really trust
00:21:42.33\00:21:48.02
God. You asked about ministry
and it's a way of explaining
00:21:48.05\00:21:51.75
that I also work, Ron and I have
a ministry, and I'll share about
00:21:51.79\00:21:56.54
that, but I also work with
Maasai Development Project which
00:21:56.57\00:22:00.58
is a non-profit in states
and registered in Kenya as well.
00:22:00.62\00:22:04.24
We work with the Maasai people.
I was just in Africa for two
00:22:04.28\00:22:09.55
weeks. When you go to Africa
it's like you just live with God
00:22:09.59\00:22:14.83
I don't know how else to
describe it but when we're here
00:22:14.86\00:22:18.68
in the states for me there's
always somebody I know to call.
00:22:18.71\00:22:22.38
There's always a policeman on
the corner. There's always some
00:22:22.41\00:22:25.68
organization, there's always
something. Over there there's
00:22:25.72\00:22:29.10
not and you learn to trust in
God. You learn to develop that.
00:22:29.14\00:22:32.15
This time when we were there
we were having some difficulties
00:22:32.19\00:22:35.35
and the time that we spent
in the word and the time that we
00:22:35.39\00:22:38.99
spent praying and the things
that God revealed to us and
00:22:39.03\00:22:42.50
shared with us were just so
incredible that it becomes that
00:22:42.53\00:22:47.60
relationship. It's not about
every little thing you do; is it
00:22:47.63\00:22:52.72
right or is it wrong; it becomes
am I trusting God? What does it
00:22:52.76\00:22:58.61
say in his word? Am I following
that? I have a couple scripture
00:22:58.64\00:23:03.66
songs that tend to float around
in my mind sometimes, but hymns
00:23:03.70\00:23:08.64
don't usually do that. One night
we were really struggling with a
00:23:08.68\00:23:13.59
problem with another
organization. We'd been praying
00:23:13.62\00:23:16.02
about it and I crawled in
bed and all of a sudden "Tis So
00:23:16.06\00:23:19.70
Sweet to Trust in Jesus was
going through my mind, all the
00:23:19.74\00:23:23.25
verses, the chorus, just over
and over and over and I just
00:23:23.29\00:23:27.08
laid in bed and grinned because
it was like God, you're so
00:23:27.11\00:23:31.28
awesome. It's that kind of
thing rather than am I doing
00:23:31.31\00:23:35.03
everything right? Is God going
to zap me because I did one
00:23:35.06\00:23:38.60
thing wrong. And it becomes
trusting him and what do you
00:23:38.63\00:23:42.10
want me to do? And that is just
so different than that waiting
00:23:42.14\00:23:47.03
for God to zap you
because you made one wrong move.
00:23:47.06\00:23:50.01
That's called relationship,
that's called reciprocation.
00:23:50.05\00:23:54.18
Draw near to me, Celeste, and
I'll draw near to you. So I can
00:23:54.22\00:23:59.39
see that working in you.
Now yours and Ron's ministry is?
00:23:59.42\00:24:04.56
Abundant Life Ministry.
And what does that entail?
00:24:04.59\00:24:08.08
We discussed quitting our jobs.
00:24:08.11\00:24:14.22
But you know what we've
00:24:14.25\00:24:15.63
discovered. We both are
00:24:15.66\00:24:16.97
independent contractors in the
00:24:17.01\00:24:21.08
the housing business, that God
sends us places to people that
00:24:21.12\00:24:25.47
need the information that we
have; that we need to share him
00:24:25.50\00:24:31.09
with those people. So our
ministry is not as much about a
00:24:31.12\00:24:36.26
specific ministry like we think
about a lot of times. Yes, we
00:24:36.29\00:24:40.75
have facilitated the Binding the
Wounds and yes we do speaking
00:24:40.78\00:24:44.91
at times but it's really about
that one on one with others.
00:24:44.94\00:24:48.94
It's about reaching out to those
people that are in our life,
00:24:48.98\00:24:54.37
that God places in our life
and how can we help them. For me
00:24:54.40\00:24:59.76
it's about praying. God
has really given me the gift of
00:24:59.79\00:25:03.99
intercessory prayer and it
is so awesome to pray for people
00:25:04.02\00:25:07.88
that don't really believe
in God and share that with them
00:25:07.91\00:25:11.54
that you're praying for them.
For instance, I have a friend
00:25:11.57\00:25:15.51
who just had colon cancer and
had surgery and I was praying
00:25:15.55\00:25:19.42
for her. She later told me, she
said, you know, I just think you
00:25:19.46\00:25:22.90
really have a direct link and
now that's made a direct impact
00:25:22.93\00:25:26.39
on her life. And I hear her
saying little things like, well
00:25:26.43\00:25:30.79
I sent up a few words to God
about this or that. So it's just
00:25:30.82\00:25:34.31
walking through your life and
being willing to share what he
00:25:34.34\00:25:37.77
has done for you whenever
you can and watching for those
00:25:37.81\00:25:41.17
people that are hurting. There
are so many hurting people out
00:25:41.21\00:25:44.28
there and they hide
behind so many things.
00:25:44.31\00:25:47.26
Amen. But you
understand what that's like.
00:25:47.29\00:25:50.21
I understand what that's like.
00:25:50.24\00:25:52.55
Exactly right. And you
know Ron knows what it's
00:25:52.59\00:25:54.86
like to hide behind the anger
so no one can get close and I
00:25:54.90\00:25:58.85
know what it's like to hide
behind looking and behaving well
00:25:58.88\00:26:02.73
and all of that. Yet there's
still that emptiness behind
00:26:02.76\00:26:06.58
that. Yes. Well I
know that you're a
00:26:06.61\00:26:08.98
lovely couple and I just hope
that you are working things out
00:26:09.02\00:26:15.60
together and that you are
becoming true representatives
00:26:15.63\00:26:18.95
of him and Him of
course with a capital H.
00:26:18.98\00:26:21.83
Absolutely because without that
there's nothing. That is for
00:26:21.87\00:26:26.24
sure. Yes. I know
that you're full of
00:26:26.27\00:26:32.98
wisdom because I can see the
wisdom behind those eyes there.
00:26:33.02\00:26:36.54
If you could take maybe about
30 or 45 seconds and talk into
00:26:36.57\00:26:39.51
the camera and just tell women
out there that are hurting that
00:26:39.54\00:26:42.02
have different issues that they
are dealing with, what would you
00:26:42.05\00:26:44.50
tell them? I would
tell them to not be
00:26:44.53\00:26:47.52
afraid to make a change in
themselves, to not be afraid to
00:26:47.56\00:26:51.79
really truly trust God. Step up
to the plate with him. Ask him
00:26:51.83\00:26:56.03
what he wants you to do.
Be willing to hear that still,
00:26:56.06\00:26:58.92
small voice and be willing to
ask someone for help if you need
00:26:58.96\00:27:02.33
help. Don't be afraid and don't
be ashamed of anything that's
00:27:02.37\00:27:05.57
going on in your life. Know that
there is somebody out there who
00:27:05.60\00:27:08.77
cares about you
and will listen to you.
00:27:08.80\00:27:10.44
Amen. Well this has absolutely
been a wonderful time, Celeste,
00:27:10.48\00:27:14.31
that we can sit and visit
together. I know that God has
00:27:14.34\00:27:17.51
a special work for you to do yet
in this world. So I just want to
00:27:17.55\00:27:21.75
thank you for being here. I know
that the people that are out
00:27:21.79\00:27:26.13
there appreciate what you have
said and that they will send
00:27:26.16\00:27:30.11
their prayers for you. I just
want to thank each one of you
00:27:30.15\00:27:34.07
for being here today, for
listening to us and I just
00:27:34.10\00:27:37.77
want to close with
this particular scripture.
00:27:37.80\00:27:41.60
It's Psalm 4:4: In anger do
not sin and when you are on your
00:27:41.64\00:27:49.13
beds search your
hearts and be silent.
00:27:49.16\00:27:51.87
Thank you Jesus
for being with us
00:27:51.90\00:27:56.04