Hello and welcome to
Heaven's Point of View.
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My name is Dr. Yvonne
Lewis and I have the privilege
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of co-hosting this Series of
Love, Marriage, Sex, and Divorce
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from the New
Testament perspective
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with Dr. Tom Sheperd
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and Dr. Sheperd is a Professor
of New Testament Interpretation
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at Andrews University
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and the Director of their Ph.
D. and Th. D. religion programs
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so, thank you
so much Dr. Sheperd
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for what you've been
giving us in this Series...
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Tom: All right.
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We have some very interesting
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information today
too, as well, to share.
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So, last time, we
ended up with Matthew 19:9
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and we were talking about that,
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where Jesus talked about
hard hearts and hardened hearts
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can you just kind of
expand on that a little bit?
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Okay, well, we noticed that the
Religious Leaders of Jesus' day
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were using the Old
Testament "Case Law"
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to make rulings allowing
them to divorce their wives
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for a whole, wide
variety of reasons
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and they came to Jesus to see
what He thought about the matter
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and we found that the Case Law
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was found in
Deuteronomy 24 verses 1 to 4,
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we've looked at that
already and it was actually
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that Case Law
back in Deuteronomy...
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was designed to
protect women. Yvonne: Hmmm...
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Not to abuse them as the
Law had been twisted to mean,
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now, in Jesus day,
they were using this to...
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to actually go the opposite
direction of what Deuteronomy
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has been built for,
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Deuteronomy was
there to protect women
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and what
happened by Jesus' day was
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they were using Deuteronomy's
Law as... like an excuse
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for divorcing their wives
for almost any reason at all
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according to one of the
Schools of Thought in Jesus' day
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so, Jesus restored the
Command to its original intent
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and He pointed
back further to Creation
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so, what I'd like to do is...
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is to go back and
read the whole passage,
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it's always good to just
refresh and see where we've been
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and maybe somebody hasn't
seen the whole Presentation
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so we hear the whole
passage and get it in context.
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Right. Matthew 19
verses 3 through 12.
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Verses 3 through 12,
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"The Pharisees also came to Him,
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testing Him and saying to Him,
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'Is it lawful for a
man to divorce his wife
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for just any reason?' and
He answered and said to them
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'Have you not read that He
who made them at the beginning
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made them male and
female and said: for this reason
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a man shall leave
his father and mother
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and be joined to his wife
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and the two
shall become one flesh
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so then, they are no
longer two but one flesh
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therefore, what God
has joined together,
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let not man separate. '
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They said to Him,
'Why then did Moses command
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to give a certificate of
divorce and to put her away?'
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He said to them,
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'Moses, because of the
hardness of your hearts,
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permitted you to
divorce your wives,
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but from the
beginning it was not so.
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And I say to you,
whoever divorces his wife,
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except for sexual
immorality, and marries another,
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commits adultery:
and whoever marries her
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who is divorced
commits adultery. '
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His disciples said to Him,
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'If such is the case
of the man with his wife,
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it is better not to marry. '
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But He said to them, 'All
cannot accept this saying,
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but only those to
whom it has been given.
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For there are eunuchs
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who were born thus
from their mother's womb,
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and there are eunuchs
who were made eunuchs by men,
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and there are eunuchs who
have made themselves eunuchs
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for the kingdom
of heaven's sake.
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He who is able to accept
it, let him accept it. '"
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Okay, well the last section...
maybe we'll have a few minutes
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at the end... we can just
talk about that a little bit.
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I'd like a little
clarification on that myself.
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But right now, we
are focusing in on...
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around verses 8 and 9
to take a look at them
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and we need to kind of
unpack this pretty carefully
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because there are a lot of
questions that people will raise
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about what Jesus has said.
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The Pharisees had asked Him
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whether it was okay to
divorce your wife for any cause
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and that really was
linked into Deuteronomy 24
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as we noted before
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and their particular
interpretation of it,
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Jesus had taken and said,
"Well now, you need to look back
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to God's plan in Creation,
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and the Creation pattern
was one man and one woman
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and that... the man
leaves his father and mother
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and is joined to his wife...
the two become one flesh.
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He says, "What God
has joined together,
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let not man separate. "
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So, you're not
supposed to divide up...
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you're supposed
to stay together,
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just like we said
from Deuteronomy...
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I'm sorry, not
Deuteronomy but from Malachi...
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God says, "I hate divorce,"
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okay, so then this
brings them to their question
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in response to Him, they say,
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"Well, but then why
did Moses command us
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to give a
Certificate of Divorce?"
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And the perceptive reader
will notice that Jesus says,
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"Well it was because of
the hardness of your heart
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that Moses allowed
you to divorce... "
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so he permitted it,
it wasn't a command.
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Right and so, there was
no real command for divorce.
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Correct, in fact,
throughout the Bible,
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there is no command to divorce,
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we noted that there are
two different kinds of Law
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one is called
"Apodictic" that's a great word,
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Apodictic Law.
Yvonne: It has a ring to it.
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And it has a ring to it,
the other one is Case Law.
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Apodictic Law is a law
that applies to everybody
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in all situations,
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so, this is like
the Ten Commandments.
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Yvonne: Okay.
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"Remember the Sabbath
day to keep it holy... "
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"Don't commit
adultery," "Don't steal,"
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those things apply to everybody
at all times in all situations
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then you have
things that are Case Law,
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Let's say, "Well, if a man's ox
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breaks down his neighbor's fence
and goes and eats his corn,
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then you should do
this. " Yvonne: Right.
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Right, so that's a particular
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case situation
that deals with it.
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Right, specifically
targeting certain situations.
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Yeah, certain situations...
so we've said that there is no
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command in Apodictic
Law in the Bible to divorce,
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it's an important concept,
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there's knowing these
overall things... because, why?
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Because divorce
is not God's plan
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for all marriages. Hmmm...
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You see, He says,
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"Don't commit
adultery," that's Apodictic Law,
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but there's only "Case Law"
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that deals with the
question of divorce,
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so, Deuteronomy 24, actually,
assumes the presence of divorce
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and then it makes a Law
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in order to control the bad
situations that result from it.
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Hmmm...
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Okay, it's not there to
say that divorce is okay,
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it's there to minimize
the bad effects of divorce
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that were already
present in their Society.
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It's like we say
in Christian Theology
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what is needed is
not a change of partner,
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what is needed is
a change of heart.
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Hmmm...
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And so, our hearts
need to be converted
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and you can learn to love,
you can learn to love again,
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if you fell into love or
you make a choice about love
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and then you came to the place
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where you didn't
love your spouse anymore,
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you can learn to love again.
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And you know, it's
an interesting point,
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Dr. Sheperd... because,
sometimes you hear a spouse say,
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"Well, I just don't love
my husband or my wife anymore,
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I just don't feel that anymore"
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and what you're
saying is, "You can... "
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well, I hear you saying
a few things... number one,
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you can get that again,
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if you had it before,
you can have it again.
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Tom: Yes. Yvonne:
And it is a choice.
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It is a choice,
yeah, love is a choice
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and remember we
talked about... before...
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sometime back in these programs
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about the
meaning of how the Bible
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uses the term "love"
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when it says... "to
love God with all your heart,
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to love your
neighbor as yourself. "
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Those were not just romantic...
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those were not
romantic kinds of concepts,
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now, some people will say,
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"Yeah, but, marriage is supposed
to be all... all romantic,"
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well, it's romantic but
there's more than the romance
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you know, there's a certain
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choice you make
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to affirm and to support
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and to bless the
other person around you.
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So, we should note that in
this whole dispute with Jesus,
00:08:39.65\00:08:45.95
there were two
different schools of thought
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that we talked about,
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the School of Hillel
and the School of Shammai,
00:08:49.16\00:08:51.26
these were schools of thought
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among the religious
leaders of Jesus' day,
00:08:54.63\00:08:56.83
and the School
of Hillel said that
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they would let you have
divorce for almost any reason,
00:09:00.87\00:09:03.14
you could burn the toast
and you could get a divorce,
00:09:03.17\00:09:05.41
the School of Shammai said,
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"Only for sexual immorality. "
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Now we might suppose
that what would happen is
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there'd be a lot more people
flocking to the School of Hillel
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and getting divorces
because they were unhappy.
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But what happened was
the School of Hillel...
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they lengthened the
process for getting a divorce
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which made it harder to do,
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where the process was more
simple in the School of Shammai
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because their
standard was higher,
00:09:32.40\00:09:34.04
so the two schools that are...
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Yvonne: Pro's and cons...
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You cannot destroy marriages
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and expect the
Society to stay healthy.
00:09:41.71\00:09:44.88
That's very true.
00:09:44.91\00:09:47.45
And we in America... and
we in the church in America
00:09:47.48\00:09:51.79
of all people
need to understand this
00:09:51.85\00:09:54.29
and we need to help
make changes about this
00:09:54.32\00:09:57.03
because our Society
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is having more and
more trouble with this.
00:09:59.06\00:10:01.26
All right, now, this
brings us to verse 9,
00:10:01.30\00:10:03.47
so let's read
verse 9 one more time.
00:10:03.50\00:10:05.27
Okay, verse 9
says, "And I say to you
00:10:05.30\00:10:07.00
whoever divorces his wife
except for sexual immorality
00:10:07.04\00:10:10.57
and marries
another commits adultery
00:10:10.61\00:10:12.97
and whoever
marries her who is divorced
00:10:13.04\00:10:15.38
commits adultery. "
00:10:15.41\00:10:16.75
All right now,
this statement of Jesus,
00:10:16.78\00:10:20.78
people study it and
study it and study it,
00:10:20.82\00:10:24.59
and they parse
it and pull it apart
00:10:24.62\00:10:27.19
but we're going to talk about
00:10:27.22\00:10:29.79
some of that
kind of relationship
00:10:29.82\00:10:31.99
but let's just focus in on the
basic compounds and make sure
00:10:32.03\00:10:36.20
we get the basic message.
00:10:36.23\00:10:37.57
If you divorce... and then...
except for sexual immorality
00:10:37.60\00:10:41.20
and marry another,
that's the same as adultery,
00:10:41.27\00:10:43.30
Jesus had a
formula you might say,
00:10:43.34\00:10:46.51
divorce plus
remarriage equals adultery...
00:10:46.54\00:10:50.95
Hmmm...
00:10:50.98\00:10:52.31
Unless there's
sexual immorality involved.
00:10:52.35\00:10:55.35
Now exactly what does He mean
00:10:55.38\00:10:57.42
when he uses this term?
00:10:57.45\00:10:58.79
Sexual immorality or porneia,
00:10:58.82\00:11:01.22
we'll have to
unpack that a little bit.
00:11:01.26\00:11:05.03
But Jesus is very
much against divorce
00:11:05.06\00:11:08.73
now, is it the same as
adultery to just get divorced?
00:11:08.76\00:11:13.44
No, the answer is no,
a person who has divorced
00:11:13.47\00:11:20.08
it's a tragedy,
it's a tragic situation
00:11:20.11\00:11:23.11
but it is not adultery, so
they haven't like... broken
00:11:23.14\00:11:26.45
one of the Ten
Commandments when they do that.
00:11:26.48\00:11:28.25
Now, we have a tendency...
I don't know why it is...
00:11:28.28\00:11:31.85
but we have a
tendency... as humans
00:11:31.89\00:11:33.36
to look down on people
who have been divorced.
00:11:33.39\00:11:35.56
Hmmm... hmmm...
00:11:35.59\00:11:36.93
And sometimes
the divorce happens
00:11:36.96\00:11:38.29
because of no fault of
their own... does it occur
00:11:38.33\00:11:41.66
the other person
just... went off and just did...
00:11:41.70\00:11:45.37
and just departed and
just created a situation
00:11:45.40\00:11:49.07
that caused great
heartache in their home.
00:11:49.10\00:11:51.27
They didn't want that,
but we always tend to look
00:11:51.31\00:11:54.38
and say, "Well, but
they are probably to blame"
00:11:54.41\00:11:57.35
you know, and we in the church
need to step back and say,
00:11:57.38\00:12:00.52
"You know what? It
doesn't matter what happened
00:12:00.58\00:12:03.02
we got to love them,
we got to care for them,
00:12:03.08\00:12:05.49
we got to support them. "
00:12:05.55\00:12:06.89
Now if they need
to commit you know,
00:12:06.92\00:12:09.49
if they need to
repent of their sin and say,
00:12:09.52\00:12:12.69
"I did something wrong,"
they need to confess that
00:12:12.73\00:12:15.10
that's part of
Christian life as well.
00:12:15.13\00:12:17.50
All right, but
Jesus' statement here,
00:12:17.53\00:12:19.87
"Divorce by itself is
not described as adultery,
00:12:19.90\00:12:22.84
divorce is not the will of God,
00:12:22.87\00:12:25.07
but if one
remains single afterwards
00:12:25.14\00:12:27.41
it does not call for censure
by the Community of Faith. "
00:12:27.44\00:12:29.91
It seems divorce
is its own censure.
00:12:29.94\00:12:32.98
That is very true,
after divorce, many times,
00:12:33.01\00:12:36.82
you find that people
kind of tend to take sides.
00:12:36.85\00:12:39.95
They do.
00:12:39.99\00:12:41.32
And then if you
had friends as a couple
00:12:41.36\00:12:43.93
prior to your
divorce, then who becomes...
00:12:43.96\00:12:46.06
who's still your
friend and who's not.
00:12:46.09\00:12:48.20
Tom: Yeah. Yvonne: So people...
00:12:48.23\00:12:49.86
it is its own censure.
00:12:49.90\00:12:51.23
Tom: Yeah, yeah.
Yvonne: That's true.
00:12:51.27\00:12:52.60
Okay, so now we've got
to walk through a little bit
00:12:52.63\00:12:55.04
about what goes on
here and press forward,
00:12:55.10\00:12:58.31
sometimes...
sometimes... not always...
00:12:58.34\00:13:01.54
sometimes to
remarry after divorce,
00:13:01.58\00:13:05.15
is the same as
committing adultery.
00:13:05.21\00:13:08.78
Okay, why would that be?
00:13:08.82\00:13:10.99
Probably because the
first marriage was not dissolved
00:13:11.02\00:13:15.06
in a court and
through the will of God
00:13:15.09\00:13:16.76
and thus, to remarry would be
00:13:16.79\00:13:18.39
the same as committing adultery
against the first spouse.
00:13:18.43\00:13:21.06
Hmmm...
00:13:21.10\00:13:22.43
Okay, so, you know, we
have to think about this,
00:13:22.46\00:13:25.37
now, there's a linkage
here to Deuteronomy 24,
00:13:25.43\00:13:28.54
Jesus' statement does not
affirm divorce in the Torah
00:13:28.57\00:13:32.64
we've already noted...
00:13:32.67\00:13:34.01
there are no
Apodictic divorce laws
00:13:34.04\00:13:35.98
and it wasn't God's
will for them to divorce
00:13:36.01\00:13:39.11
and so, Deuteronomy 24
00:13:39.18\00:13:41.15
limited the
damage that was there.
00:13:41.18\00:13:44.19
Now, when we come to
Jesus' "exception clause,"
00:13:44.22\00:13:47.62
He says, "Except for the case
of porneia or sexual immorality"
00:13:47.66\00:13:53.16
what does He mean? okay...
00:13:53.19\00:13:55.86
Sexual immorality...
this term was a bit of a
00:13:55.90\00:14:00.30
flexible term, it could
mean, having sexual intercourse
00:14:00.34\00:14:03.00
with somebody
who's not your spouse,
00:14:03.04\00:14:04.81
okay, in general, it
could also mean incest,
00:14:04.84\00:14:08.14
having sex with a
child in your family,
00:14:08.18\00:14:11.15
sex with a prostitute...
00:14:11.18\00:14:12.91
is the way the term is
used sometimes... porneia...
00:14:12.95\00:14:14.98
okay, the question is,
00:14:15.02\00:14:16.89
what is the
meaning here in Matthew 19?
00:14:16.95\00:14:20.66
The linkage to Deuteronomy 24,
00:14:20.69\00:14:23.16
in the context of the
Pharisees' question to Jesus,
00:14:23.19\00:14:26.09
is helpful in this regard, okay?
00:14:26.13\00:14:28.96
Their question arose from the
debate between the two schools
00:14:29.00\00:14:32.43
of Hillel and Shammai.
00:14:32.47\00:14:35.30
Now, they were both looking
at the same Old Testament text.
00:14:35.34\00:14:38.54
Yvonne: Right.
Tom: Deuteronomy 24.
00:14:38.57\00:14:40.44
And they came across a
phrase that we translate as
00:14:40.48\00:14:45.48
"a matter of indecency"
a matter of indecency...
00:14:45.51\00:14:50.49
okay, now the
two different schools
00:14:50.52\00:14:53.46
focused on the
two different terms.
00:14:53.49\00:14:56.32
The School of Hillel
focused on the term, "matter,"
00:14:56.36\00:15:00.23
"matter of indecency"
00:15:00.26\00:15:03.37
so they said, you
could divorce for any cause,
00:15:03.40\00:15:06.70
it's a matter of
indecency... matter...
00:15:06.74\00:15:09.40
the School of Shammai
focused on the word, "indecency"
00:15:09.44\00:15:12.81
it's a matter of
indecency, okay, it's kind of...
00:15:12.84\00:15:16.85
put it in colloquial terms
00:15:16.88\00:15:18.91
or kind of terms that
are easier to understand.
00:15:18.95\00:15:22.12
So they focused on...
00:15:22.15\00:15:23.49
one focused on the word "matter"
00:15:23.52\00:15:25.09
the other focused on
the word, "indecency. "
00:15:25.12\00:15:27.19
That Matthew has the
term, "porneia" would suggest
00:15:27.22\00:15:32.33
that Jesus comes down, actually,
on the School of Shammai's side
00:15:32.36\00:15:36.10
that is... it's the...
"a matter of indecency"
00:15:36.13\00:15:39.13
that porneia is the
indecency which is...
00:15:39.17\00:15:41.14
the sexual immorality
00:15:41.17\00:15:42.90
has some kind of
sexual evil involved here
00:15:42.94\00:15:46.81
where somebody has done
something sexually wrong
00:15:46.84\00:15:49.54
so, the question is
00:15:49.58\00:15:52.71
what does Jesus
affirm here? Right?
00:15:52.75\00:15:55.95
He says that marriage
has a divine component,
00:15:55.98\00:15:59.55
right, it is not
simply a contract
00:15:59.59\00:16:02.79
between a man and a
woman, it is a link to God.
00:16:02.82\00:16:07.56
God is the one who affirms a
marriage when it takes place.
00:16:07.60\00:16:11.37
So, it's not just a
contract between people.
00:16:11.43\00:16:13.97
So, it has this
divine component.
00:16:14.00\00:16:16.54
Jesus acknowledges the shift
that took place under Moses,
00:16:16.60\00:16:20.58
He said that he permitted this,
it wasn't something he commanded
00:16:20.61\00:16:24.05
it wasn't God's will but
it was because of hard hearts
00:16:24.08\00:16:27.72
that this took place.
00:16:27.75\00:16:29.95
That cannot be
God's ideal. Hmmm...
00:16:29.98\00:16:33.15
God doesn't want hard hearts,
God wants changed hearts.
00:16:33.19\00:16:35.76
Right. Right...
00:16:35.79\00:16:37.13
He calls people
back to Creation order,
00:16:37.16\00:16:41.00
He says that from the
beginning it wasn't that way
00:16:41.03\00:16:44.80
and he calls them back
to live as God wanted them.
00:16:44.83\00:16:48.57
But then He has this exception,
00:16:48.60\00:16:50.34
it's the allowance for a release
from a marriage commitment
00:16:50.41\00:16:52.87
based on gross moral failure.
00:16:52.91\00:16:55.44
So, He's not doing it for
light matters like Hillel,
00:16:55.51\00:16:58.18
it has to be something serious
okay... that is taking place.
00:16:58.21\00:17:01.62
Now, this actually
is also not a command,
00:17:01.65\00:17:04.25
that's very important to notice.
00:17:04.29\00:17:05.62
He doesn't say,
"You have to get divorced
00:17:05.65\00:17:08.29
if your spouse has been
sleeping with somebody else. "
00:17:08.32\00:17:11.43
He doesn't say,
"You have to get that,"
00:17:11.46\00:17:14.00
He says, "You can
but you do not have to. "
00:17:14.03\00:17:16.53
Sexual sin can be forgiven,
divorce is not required
00:17:16.56\00:17:21.90
but it is
allowed on these grounds.
00:17:21.94\00:17:24.87
If the "hard-hearted"
refers to the person
00:17:24.91\00:17:26.88
who committed adultery,
00:17:26.91\00:17:28.24
then the release
given to the innocent party
00:17:28.28\00:17:32.05
is justice in the
face of sinful defiance.
00:17:32.11\00:17:36.08
Somebody who will not change,
they will not repent, okay.
00:17:36.12\00:17:40.56
So that is... if
you're in a marriage
00:17:40.59\00:17:42.99
with someone that
is a serial adulterer
00:17:43.02\00:17:45.06
and you keep saying,
00:17:45.09\00:17:46.43
"Look, I can't
deal with this anymore"
00:17:46.46\00:17:48.56
and the person
just continues on,
00:17:48.60\00:17:52.03
then, you do have
Biblical grounds...
00:17:52.07\00:17:54.40
to divorce.
Tom: Yes, to divorce.
00:17:54.44\00:17:56.71
Yeah, right, so, if the
hard-hearted is actually
00:17:56.74\00:17:59.07
the innocent party,
some people take it that way
00:17:59.11\00:18:01.34
that it is the innocent
party, calling them to forgive
00:18:01.38\00:18:04.21
then Jesus' command goes even
beyond the School of Shammai
00:18:04.25\00:18:07.02
where they say it is a
command to divorce such people
00:18:07.05\00:18:11.15
when they commit
adultery and you divorce them.
00:18:11.19\00:18:13.56
Jesus indicates that
while that is permitted,
00:18:13.62\00:18:15.86
that that was not
God's original idea
00:18:15.89\00:18:18.19
and He wants healing
and it is the innocent party
00:18:18.23\00:18:20.43
who has the
ability, by the grace of God,
00:18:20.46\00:18:22.46
to actually bring healing
by forgiving the offender.
00:18:22.50\00:18:26.43
Of course, if the
offender doesn't repent,
00:18:26.47\00:18:29.07
there's an interesting thing
00:18:29.10\00:18:33.41
that we can
stop and mention here
00:18:33.44\00:18:34.94
and that's the
issue of forgiveness.
00:18:34.98\00:18:36.48
Hmmm...
00:18:36.51\00:18:37.91
Forgiveness sets us free
00:18:37.95\00:18:41.08
from the control of the sin
00:18:41.12\00:18:44.29
that has come into our life or
into the life of other people.
00:18:44.32\00:18:48.06
If that person
still isn't repentant,
00:18:48.09\00:18:52.53
if you forgive them,
00:18:52.56\00:18:54.83
it sets you free from
their control in your life.
00:18:54.86\00:18:58.17
That's right.
00:18:58.23\00:18:59.57
Yeah and it's a deep
topic, it's a deep thought
00:18:59.60\00:19:03.10
but it's a hard
thought, I've seen that...
00:19:03.14\00:19:08.38
I have seen that
to forgive somebody
00:19:08.41\00:19:10.61
when they've really done
you really wrong, now, you know,
00:19:10.65\00:19:13.11
if they just did some minor...
small thing, that's like nothing
00:19:13.15\00:19:16.52
but, I mean, if they really did
something really terrible to you
00:19:16.55\00:19:19.89
and they don't...
they're not sorry for it...
00:19:19.92\00:19:23.39
that's the hardest situation
but if you forgive them
00:19:23.43\00:19:27.40
and you're saying...
00:19:27.43\00:19:30.00
you're
recognizing that it's wrong
00:19:30.03\00:19:32.03
because you don't forgive
something that's not wrong...
00:19:32.07\00:19:34.74
Hmmm... hmmm...
00:19:34.77\00:19:36.10
you're
recognizing that it's wrong
00:19:36.14\00:19:37.64
but you're actually
giving it over to God
00:19:37.67\00:19:39.24
and letting Him
take care of your life.
00:19:39.27\00:19:40.74
This is so important in
so many aspects of life.
00:19:40.78\00:19:44.35
It is because it
holds you in its grip,
00:19:44.38\00:19:49.08
if you don't forgive...
the anger and all that
00:19:49.12\00:19:53.76
holds you in its grip and it
has power and control over you
00:19:53.79\00:19:57.39
but once you release it
and you give it to the Lord
00:19:57.43\00:20:00.83
and you ask the Lord to give
you a spirit of forgiveness,
00:20:00.86\00:20:03.40
it sets you free.
Tom: That's right.
00:20:03.43\00:20:05.80
It's really not so much for the
other person... it's for you.
00:20:05.83\00:20:09.80
And what I've discovered is
00:20:09.84\00:20:11.71
that when they've done
you wrong really badly wrong,
00:20:11.74\00:20:14.81
you have to forgive
them over and over again.
00:20:14.84\00:20:18.31
Hmmm... hmmm...
00:20:18.38\00:20:19.71
You know, Jesus one time
said to Peter that your...
00:20:19.75\00:20:22.15
Peter said, "How many times
should I forgive my brother,
00:20:22.18\00:20:24.59
if he sins against
me, up to 7 times?"
00:20:24.62\00:20:26.45
And Jesus said, "No,
Seventy times seven... "
00:20:26.52\00:20:27.99
And we say, "Well,
that's just like...
00:20:28.02\00:20:29.69
don't stop... stop
counting... " kind of a thing
00:20:29.72\00:20:32.13
well, I've kind of discovered
a new meaning for that
00:20:32.19\00:20:34.46
it's like,
sometimes when somebody
00:20:34.50\00:20:37.07
has really done you wrong,
00:20:37.10\00:20:38.50
you have to
forgive them 490 times
00:20:38.53\00:20:40.80
for it to sink in to in your
own life... in your own heart...
00:20:40.84\00:20:43.24
you know, to kind
of settle into you,
00:20:43.27\00:20:45.24
that you say, "Yeah, I don't...
you know... I have forgiven"
00:20:45.27\00:20:49.01
and that's by the grace
of God but it's something
00:20:49.04\00:20:52.21
you sort of... go over
and over and over again,
00:20:52.25\00:20:55.38
and this kind of hurts...
00:20:55.45\00:20:57.12
it can really take
a long time to heal.
00:20:57.19\00:21:00.66
And again, we in the church
00:21:00.72\00:21:02.42
should be
thoughtful of such things.
00:21:02.49\00:21:07.16
All right, now,
this exception clause
00:21:07.20\00:21:11.83
is rather challenging sometimes
00:21:11.87\00:21:15.50
it's kind of expressed
in several different ways
00:21:15.54\00:21:18.04
and some people wonder
"what does it really refer to. "
00:21:18.07\00:21:21.51
A man who marries an invalidly
divorced woman commits adultery.
00:21:21.54\00:21:26.51
If you follow the
same passage in Luke 16
00:21:26.55\00:21:30.35
or you look at
Matthew 5 you see this.
00:21:30.39\00:21:34.12
Anyone in Jewish Society
would agree with this position,
00:21:34.16\00:21:36.49
in fact in Judaism,
00:21:36.52\00:21:38.39
if a woman
accidently married two men,
00:21:38.43\00:21:40.73
she was treated as an adulteress
00:21:40.76\00:21:42.76
even if the fault were not hers.
00:21:42.80\00:21:44.73
Yvonne: Wow! Tom:
Which doesn't seem right
00:21:44.77\00:21:46.43
but that was
the kind of thing...
00:21:46.47\00:21:48.47
so a man who married an invalid
divorced woman commits adultery,
00:21:48.50\00:21:51.21
a man who
invalidly divorces his wife,
00:21:51.24\00:21:54.51
causes her to commit adultery,
00:21:54.54\00:21:56.04
there seems to be a
nuance of that in Matthew 5
00:21:56.08\00:21:58.58
and again in Matthew 19.
00:21:58.61\00:22:00.92
In Matthew 5, if
the woman remarries
00:22:00.95\00:22:04.45
and thereby commits adultery,
00:22:04.49\00:22:06.12
then her former husband
seems to be... partly to blame
00:22:06.15\00:22:08.49
because he shouldn't have
divorced her in the first place.
00:22:08.52\00:22:10.83
Right...
right... hmmm... hmmm...
00:22:10.86\00:22:12.49
another way of looking
at this exception clause
00:22:12.56\00:22:16.30
has to do with the idea
00:22:16.33\00:22:18.33
that a man who
invalidly divorces his wife
00:22:18.37\00:22:21.64
and marries
another commits adultery.
00:22:21.67\00:22:24.07
This kind of turns it
in the other direction
00:22:24.11\00:22:26.11
and in Mark chapter 10
and Matthew 19 and Luke 16...
00:22:26.14\00:22:29.44
all seem to have some
of that kind of flavor.
00:22:29.51\00:22:31.21
What I'm doing here is I'm...
00:22:31.25\00:22:32.58
I'm actually talking about
comparing the different ways
00:22:32.61\00:22:35.38
that Jesus talks about
divorce in the Synoptic gospels.
00:22:35.42\00:22:37.65
Yvonne: Right.
00:22:37.69\00:22:39.02
Sometimes people worry
about that... that you know,
00:22:39.05\00:22:41.49
it's not exactly the same
words here than it is there
00:22:41.52\00:22:44.49
but actually, if you
were to take people into Court
00:22:44.53\00:22:47.46
you know, four
witnesses into Court,
00:22:47.50\00:22:49.63
and they all said
exactly the same thing
00:22:49.66\00:22:51.73
about an accident,
00:22:51.77\00:22:53.67
you would say, "I
think they were outside
00:22:53.70\00:22:56.81
talking together and
making the story up. "
00:22:56.84\00:22:59.91
Right...
00:22:59.94\00:23:01.28
But when we come
to the four gospels
00:23:01.31\00:23:02.64
and we find that they say things
not quite exactly the same
00:23:02.68\00:23:05.55
it doesn't exactly match, we
say, "oooh... oooh... no... "
00:23:05.58\00:23:08.52
but we can't trust
the Bible then... really?
00:23:08.55\00:23:11.12
It should make us trust it more.
00:23:11.15\00:23:12.79
Hmmm...
00:23:12.82\00:23:14.16
Because it's not
exactly the same...
00:23:14.19\00:23:15.69
they don't exactly match,
it's more like four witnesses
00:23:15.72\00:23:19.63
that are presenting
the information, okay,
00:23:19.66\00:23:22.36
so, over in Mark and in
Luke, even in Matthew 19,
00:23:22.40\00:23:27.47
"A man who
invalidly divorces his wife,"
00:23:27.54\00:23:29.40
so, he's at fault now,
00:23:29.44\00:23:31.11
"and marries
another... commits adultery"
00:23:31.17\00:23:33.78
for Jews this would be
difficult to accept actually
00:23:33.81\00:23:36.85
because in Jesus' day, it
was technically impossible
00:23:36.88\00:23:39.81
for a man to commit adultery
by marrying an unmarried woman
00:23:39.85\00:23:44.12
because polygamy was allowed,
that also wasn't God's idea.
00:23:44.19\00:23:47.56
Right... right...
00:23:47.59\00:23:48.92
But that's
somewhat what could happen,
00:23:48.96\00:23:51.93
but Jesus taught that
marriage should be monogamous.
00:23:51.96\00:23:55.30
He puts together the
text from Genesis 1 and 2
00:23:55.33\00:23:58.63
and He says, "Male and female
and the two become one flesh"
00:23:58.67\00:24:01.30
so since... for
Jesus... there's only monogamy
00:24:01.34\00:24:04.27
in an invalid divorce
followed by a remarriage
00:24:04.31\00:24:07.14
it would be adultery
against the first and only wife,
00:24:07.18\00:24:09.31
all right, now,
there's another case
00:24:09.34\00:24:12.45
if you look at Mark 10,
00:24:12.48\00:24:13.82
a woman who
invalidly divorces her husband
00:24:13.85\00:24:15.78
and marries
another commits adultery.
00:24:15.82\00:24:17.19
This is just saying now it's the
woman who is doing the divorce.
00:24:17.22\00:24:19.82
Right... right...
00:24:19.85\00:24:21.19
Now, some people
will want to say that
00:24:21.22\00:24:22.66
"Ah, well, Mark
must have made this up
00:24:22.72\00:24:24.56
because in Jesus' day
00:24:24.59\00:24:25.93
women couldn't divorce
their husbands in Judaism,"
00:24:25.96\00:24:29.96
well, you know what?
00:24:30.00\00:24:31.53
If you look in the gospels
00:24:31.57\00:24:34.20
you will find a
lady named Herodias.
00:24:34.24\00:24:36.14
Hmmm...
00:24:36.17\00:24:37.51
She was married
to a guy named Philip
00:24:37.54\00:24:39.77
and then she
divorces her husband, Philip,
00:24:39.81\00:24:43.65
and she marries
Herod... Yvonne: Right...
00:24:43.68\00:24:46.48
And, obviously, that took place
in the context of Palestine,
00:24:46.51\00:24:52.15
all right, so, the
Herodian women actually did this
00:24:52.19\00:24:55.66
all right, so, when Jesus says,
00:24:55.69\00:24:57.63
"a woman who
invalidly divorces her husband
00:24:57.66\00:24:59.59
and marries another
and commits adultery... "
00:24:59.63\00:25:01.50
He might be winking and saying,
00:25:01.53\00:25:02.86
"Ah yeah, don't forget
that Herodias did that, okay. "
00:25:02.90\00:25:05.63
Now, the exception
clause is really the clue
00:25:05.67\00:25:13.27
to why Jesus said
that divorce is invalid
00:25:13.31\00:25:15.88
when somebody does this,
00:25:15.91\00:25:17.98
Matthew 5 and 19
have the exception clause
00:25:18.01\00:25:20.48
Mark 10 and Luke do
not... Yvonne: Hmmm...
00:25:20.52\00:25:23.28
Now people wonder
about that, well, why not?
00:25:23.35\00:25:26.15
In the first
century, in the Jewish setting
00:25:26.19\00:25:28.99
of discussing divorce
00:25:29.02\00:25:30.36
the question about
the School of Hillel
00:25:30.39\00:25:31.73
and the School of Shammai
00:25:31.76\00:25:33.56
would have been the
matter of discussion
00:25:33.60\00:25:35.33
they would've been saying about
when they talked about divorce,
00:25:35.36\00:25:37.70
so, the new Hillel ruling
that you could divorce your wife
00:25:37.73\00:25:41.94
for any cause, okay,
00:25:41.97\00:25:43.84
did not require
any valid grounds
00:25:43.91\00:25:46.78
for the divorce and
allowed divorce for any reason
00:25:46.81\00:25:49.21
therefore, when contemporary
Jews heard the question,
00:25:49.24\00:25:51.61
"Is it lawful to
divorce your wife?"
00:25:51.65\00:25:53.31
They would have
mentally added the words,
00:25:53.35\00:25:57.55
"for any reason... "
00:25:57.59\00:25:59.75
because that's what
Hillel was talking about.
00:25:59.79\00:26:02.32
Similarly, when
they heard the reply,
00:26:02.36\00:26:04.03
"Whoever divorces his wife... "
00:26:04.06\00:26:05.89
they would have
mentally added the phrase,
00:26:05.93\00:26:08.70
"except for valid grounds. "
00:26:08.73\00:26:10.07
It's not unlike
reading Matthew 5
00:26:10.10\00:26:15.44
when Jesus... we
talked about this before...
00:26:15.47\00:26:17.44
"looking at a woman
lustfully and everything,"
00:26:17.47\00:26:19.41
okay, "I say to you that
everyone who looks at a woman
00:26:19.44\00:26:22.34
with lustful intent has already
committed adultery with her
00:26:22.38\00:26:25.28
in his heart... " the
missing implied phrase is,
00:26:25.31\00:26:27.45
"except for his own
wife," Yvonne: Right.
00:26:27.48\00:26:29.68
It's all right to
look at your wife that way.
00:26:29.72\00:26:31.05
Right.
00:26:31.09\00:26:32.42
You know, in
fact, we used to tell...
00:26:32.45\00:26:34.16
"it's encouraged," so,
from our previous thoughts
00:26:34.19\00:26:38.46
we can say, "Jesus
calls divorce... invalid
00:26:38.49\00:26:40.46
if and when there
are no valid grounds,"
00:26:40.50\00:26:42.46
but what does that mean?
00:26:42.50\00:26:44.40
The contextual meaning...
and we're running out of time...
00:26:44.43\00:26:48.97
the contextual
meaning of this...
00:26:49.00\00:26:51.24
we can just kind of
summarize in this way
00:26:51.27\00:26:53.94
since we're short on time,
00:26:53.98\00:26:55.31
Jesus taught that
marriage is for life.
00:26:55.34\00:26:56.68
Hmmm... hmmm...
00:26:56.71\00:26:58.05
He opposed divorce
00:26:58.08\00:26:59.41
but he taught
that there are valid
00:26:59.45\00:27:01.95
and invalid reasons for divorce.
00:27:01.98\00:27:04.42
The valid reasons
are in the case of...
00:27:04.45\00:27:06.69
when somebody is sexually...
00:27:06.72\00:27:09.02
has sex with somebody
other than their spouse.
00:27:09.06\00:27:12.46
Sex with someone
other than the spouse
00:27:12.49\00:27:14.33
permits... but does
not require divorce.
00:27:14.36\00:27:16.20
Divorce for invalid reasons
00:27:16.23\00:27:18.60
plus remarriage is
the same as adultery.
00:27:18.63\00:27:22.44
And that really...
basically summarizes
00:27:22.47\00:27:26.27
what He's saying in Matthew 19.
00:27:26.31\00:27:27.71
Yeah.
00:27:27.74\00:27:29.08
It is critical for
us to really study this
00:27:29.11\00:27:32.51
and ask for the Holy
Spirit's guidance on it
00:27:32.55\00:27:36.02
because so many people
are contemplating divorce
00:27:36.08\00:27:39.19
and before doing it,
really... we need to...
00:27:39.22\00:27:42.32
really get in the Word,
00:27:42.36\00:27:43.69
I know, because
I've been divorced
00:27:43.73\00:27:46.80
and it's not an easy journey.
00:27:46.83\00:27:49.73
Well, for those of you
00:27:49.76\00:27:51.53
who are married and
contemplating divorce,
00:27:51.57\00:27:54.77
get into the Word
and tune in next time
00:27:54.80\00:27:57.97
as we continue to
unpack these wonderful topics
00:27:58.04\00:28:01.41
and from our Word.
00:28:01.44\00:28:03.21