Hello, and
welcome to Heart Lift.
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I'm Jill Morikone,
and I'm so glad that
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you've joined us today.
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We're beginning a
program of hope, of healing,
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of the transformation that
the Lord Jesus wants to work
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in your heart and mine, as
women, as daughters of God.
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Are you enslaved
by your emotions?
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Do you feel held back
from following God even though
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your heart longs for Him?
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Do you wonder if you
can ever truly be forgiven,
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experience peace, and joy
in Jesus? You're not alone.
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As we journey through this
series we're going to be sharing
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real stories of real pain,
from real women, and we will see
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the transformation, the healing,
the hope that they have found,
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and that we can
experience as well.
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We're beginning
with a Scripture.
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Our Scripture is Psalm 147:2, 3.
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I love the book of Psalm.
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It just runs the
whole gamut of emotion.
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David is so honest
with God, and I love that.
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Our first Scripture
deals with brokenness and how
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God wants to heal us.
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The Lord builds up
Jerusalem: he gathers together
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the outcasts of Israel.
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He heals the broken hearted,
and binds up their wounds.
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Let's pray. Father we come
before You in the name of Jesus.
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Thank You that
You want to heal us.
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Thank You that You look in,
and You see the broken places
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in our hearts, and that
You say, I can fix that.
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I can go in and I
can bring healing.
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We open up our
hearts just now to receive
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what You have to give us.
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And we thank You in the precious
and holy name of Jesus, Amen.
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I was a young teacher
fresh out of college: innocent,
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and I'll have to
tell you, quite naive.
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She was a gorgeous girl:
upper classman in academy.
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She was probably 16 or 17.
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She had beautiful
hair, a perfect face,
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perfect complexion, even white
teeth, just a beautiful smile.
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We'll call her Megan.
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I was so caught up in
the busyness of teaching
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for the first time,
of making lesson plans,
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and grading papers, of trying to
establish classroom discipline,
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that I neglected to sit down
and ask Megan about her heart
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to see how she was really doing.
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We went for a weekend; the
school took all the kids for a
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weekend getaway,
a weekend retreat.
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And on that weekend Megan asked,
Miss Jill, Can I talk to you?
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And I said, Of course.
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So we sat down, and she looked
up at me, and I was startled
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to see the pain in her eyes.
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How long had it been there?
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How long had I not seen the
pain in this beautiful girl?
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She pushed up her sleeve
and she said, I want to show you
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something, Miss Jill.
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And it occurred to me as she
pushed up her sleeve that she
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always wore
long sleeved clothes.
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And I had never
noticed that before either.
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It seems like
long sleeved shirts,
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or sweaters, or sweat shirts.
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And I hadn't picked up on that.
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She pushed up her
sleeve, and I saw on her
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arm she'd been cutting.
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And I caught my
breath, and I said, Oh, Megan!
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No, Miss Jill, she
said, I want to show you this.
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And she turned her arms so that
I could see they were not just
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random slashes
in her tender skin.
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She had cut herself to
spell one word, H E L P, HELP!
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Even though it's been
maybe fifteen years since that
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experience, I can still
close my eyes and I can see
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the word HELP etched
in blood across her skin.
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Our world is full of
people just like Megan;
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men and women lost
and alone, longing to find
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the face of Jesus, but not
sure where they can find it.
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Can they experience
hope, and health, and victory,
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transformation in Jesus?
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I don't know
where you are right now.
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You might be saying,
Jill, I've been cutting.
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Jill, I am even
contemplating suicide.
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I don't know what pain
or sadness is in your heart.
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I don't know what
anger you're dealing with.
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Maybe you're young and you
say, I'm acting out against
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Mom and Dad because
I don't like the rules
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they have set for me, and I
am just not happy with life.
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Maybe you're married and
say, I'm mad at my husband,
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or my
ex-husband, or my boyfriend.
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Maybe it's your kids, and you're
concerned about what they're
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doing, and the
choices that they are making.
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Maybe it's fear.
Fear is a big one.
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In my life, and I don't know,
maybe it's big in your life.
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Maybe you're afraid to
live, yet terrified to die.
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Maybe you have no assurance
in your life of salvation.
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You say, I don't know
if I'm going to be saved.
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I don't know if I am, right
now, in a saving relationship
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with the Lord Jesus.
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Maybe someone that you
love is dying right now,
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and you're afraid to
face the future without them.
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Maybe you're afraid
to leave the abusive
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relationship that you're in,
or you're afraid to tell other
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people about the
one you left behind.
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Maybe you're afraid of
what other people think of you,
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or you're afraid of stepping
out and doing something for
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Jesus because of fear.
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Maybe it's not fear, but
it's resentment, or bitterness
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that you have
bottled up in your heart.
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You can't stand to
hear someone's name,
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or to see someone
because of that angst,
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that bitterness that is inside.
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Maybe it's unworthiness, and
you say, I'm not worth anything.
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I'm not worthy to be loved.
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I'm not worthy to be protected.
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I'm not worthy to be forgiven.
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And I'm not worthy even to
step out and to do something
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for the Lord Jesus.
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No matter where you fall into
any one of those categories,
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know that the Lord
Jesus wants to bring you hope.
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He wants to bring you healing.
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He wants to pour in His
transformation into your life.
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We want to start each
program with a self-evaluation.
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This is something that you're
not to share with your pastor,
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or with your spouse, or
even your best girlfriend.
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This would be something
that is between you and God,
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something that I encourage
you to be honest about.
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The self-evaluation; how would
you describe your relationship
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with God right now?
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We have six different options.
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And pick the one you feel most
closely fits where you are right
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now in your walk
with Jesus. Number one.
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You can fill in the blank.
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No matter where
you are right now,
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no matter what you're feeling.
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Maybe you say, I'm mad at God
because I was abused as a kid,
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and He should have stopped that.
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Maybe you're mad at God because
of something going on in your
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life right now, where
someone that you love is dying,
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or whatever. Maybe
that's where you are.
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And if you are, be honest.
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Put that, I'm
mad at God. Number 2.
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I was doing a teen conference,
and talking to young girls,
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and I gave them this
self-evaluation: the six
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different points
that we're going through.
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And they did not
put their name on it.
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I think you can be
much more honest if you
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don't identify yourself.
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So they did not
put their name on it.
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They turned them in, and I
was amazed to find that most of
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them were at Number 2.
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Almost all the girls there
felt like their relationship
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with God was strained.
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You know if you
have a rubber band,
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and you stretch
it, what happens?
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You get a lot of tension.
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Maybe you don't feel mad
with God, but you say there's a
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lot of tension
in our relationship.
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Let's go to Number 3.
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If you're here, if
you feel indifferent,
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you really don't care about God.
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You say, He does His
own thing, and that's fine.
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He can do His own thing.
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I'm going to do my own thing.
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I remember I was talking with
a young man who was an agnostic.
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He said, I do
believe God exists,
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but I don't think
He care about my life.
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He would be indifferent.
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Maybe you're at Number 4.
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If you're at
Number 4, that is polite.
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Polite, maybe that's
where you're at right now,
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in that polite stage.
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To me if you're in this
stage, it would be saying,
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God, if you want me to do
something, I'm happy to do it,
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as long as it agrees
with what I want to do.
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But if You say, Jill I
want you to do something,
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and I don't want to do
it, uh uh, I'm not doing it.
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God, I don't want
anything to do with that.
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To me this is the polite stage.
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I only do it if
it's something I want.
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Let's look at Number 5, friends.
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You know, if you
have a good girlfriend,
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what do you want to do?
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You want to hang out.
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You want to go out to eat.
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You might want to
go shopping together.
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You want to spend time
with people that you like,
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with your friends.
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If you're here you like God.
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You want to spend time with Him.
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You talk to Him, and you
listen, and He talks back.
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Maybe you're all the way
at the other end, Number 6.
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That would be passionate.
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If I'm being honest with
you, I would say in my own life
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probably I've been at
all six of these points.
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I know I have. All six of
them at one point or another.
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But where I want
to be is passionate.
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I want to love the Lord Jesus.
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I want to talk to Him.
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I want that unbroken communion
with God, and I know He wants
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that for me and for you as well.
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When my sister and I were
growing up, we would go into
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church... This story probably
happened when I was maybe
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five, and my sister was seven.
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We would go into church and sit
on the pew, and our little legs
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would swing, because we were
too short to reach the floor.
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We had those ribbons... Our
hair was tied up in ribbons,
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and those little ringlets,
courtesy of an awful night
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on those pink sponge rollers.
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I don't know if
you remember those.
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We had our faces
scrubbed and shining,
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but our hearts not so much.
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Someone would walk up the isle
of church, and they'd look down
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and then they'd say, And how
are Penney angels doing today?
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Penney was our maiden name.
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And my sister and I would
look up and say, Ah, we're fine!
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Happy Sabbath!
It's so good to see you!
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They would walk on.
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As soon as they went my sister
would jab an elbow into my ribs,
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or maybe I started it.
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I don't know, we're still
trying to work that one out.
00:12:17.83\00:12:20.47
But our private elbow
war would continue until the
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next person came up.
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And they would start walking
up the isle, and they would say,
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And how are the
Penney angels doing today?
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And my sister and I
would look up and say,
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We're fine. Thank you.
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And as soon as they walked
off my sister would kick me
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underneath the pew.
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Or maybe I kicked her.
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I'm not sure. We're
still deciding that one, too.
00:12:46.73\00:12:49.56
But our private war would
continue with the feet until
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the next person came up
and asked us how we were doing.
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Now as I share that story
with you, you probably say,
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Jill, that's very hypocritical.
00:13:00.11\00:13:02.28
And you would be right.
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It was a pretty good
mask that we wore; the mask.
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The mask of good Christianity
is pretty easy to slip on.
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I ought to know,
I wore it for years.
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As I grew up from that age,
as I grew up I learned I had to
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wear a mask, and
pretend to be a good Christian.
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That was one of my battles.
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I don't know, maybe
you're experiencing that today.
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Maybe someone has deeply
hurt you, and your resentment is
00:13:32.61\00:13:36.64
simmering right
underneath the surface,
00:13:36.68\00:13:38.55
yet you smile in church, even
while you tighten the lid on
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all that tumult you feel inside.
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Maybe you have no peace, no
assurance that you can be saved,
00:13:45.45\00:13:50.66
yet you lead out in church,
maybe even give Bible studies.
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Maybe you've just yelled
at your kids, or your spouse,
00:13:55.50\00:13:59.87
and all of a
sudden the doorbell rings.
00:13:59.90\00:14:02.04
And you go to
answer it, and you say,
00:14:02.07\00:14:03.74
Hey, I'm so glad you've come.
00:14:03.77\00:14:06.21
Why don't you come in
and have some lemonade?
00:14:06.24\00:14:09.11
And the kids are
there, and they're watching,
00:14:09.14\00:14:11.48
and they're learning
how to wear the mask.
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I don't know what mask you feel
like maybe you're wearing today.
00:14:15.55\00:14:20.29
On Monday night we go with
some of the ladies from church
00:14:20.32\00:14:25.26
to our local jail, and
minister to the women there;
00:14:25.29\00:14:28.80
give Bible studies to them.
00:14:28.83\00:14:30.53
This particular night the
girls were really restless.
00:14:30.57\00:14:34.00
And we stood for
prayer, and as we did I prayed
00:14:34.04\00:14:38.07
a prayer of my own.
00:14:38.11\00:14:39.44
God somehow, someway, help
us reach their hearts, please.
00:14:39.47\00:14:45.48
They settled back down.
00:14:45.51\00:14:48.18
There's not a
lot of room in jail.
00:14:48.22\00:14:50.22
In our room it's very small.
00:14:50.25\00:14:52.62
There's a desk, and
they sit four across
00:14:52.65\00:14:55.02
on the desk, legs swinging.
00:14:55.06\00:14:57.29
There's a couple of chairs.
00:14:57.33\00:14:58.83
And the fortunate ones
always get those chairs.
00:14:58.86\00:15:01.66
The rest sit cross
legged on the floor,
00:15:01.70\00:15:04.30
or we have to
stand along the wall.
00:15:04.33\00:15:07.17
This night, as we began the
study, I asked them a question.
00:15:07.20\00:15:10.71
How would someone
else describe you?
00:15:10.74\00:15:14.08
We're talking about the mask,
but I didn't ask them that.
00:15:14.11\00:15:17.41
I just said, How would
someone else describe you?
00:15:17.45\00:15:19.65
And they smiled, and looked
at each other and thought,
00:15:19.68\00:15:22.12
this should be fun.
00:15:22.15\00:15:23.49
I nodded at the first girl.
00:15:23.52\00:15:25.52
She was usually eager to
talk, and pretty excited,
00:15:25.55\00:15:29.72
so I thought she would
be a good place to begin.
00:15:29.76\00:15:32.76
Oh, she said, my
friends would call me mouthy.
00:15:32.79\00:15:36.20
And all the girls
laughed, because, obviously,
00:15:36.23\00:15:39.13
that description fit her.
00:15:39.17\00:15:40.77
I said, Thank you!
00:15:40.80\00:15:42.40
Who else wants to share?
00:15:42.44\00:15:43.94
So around the circle we went.
00:15:43.97\00:15:46.84
They said, boisterous,
and the girls laughed again.
00:15:46.88\00:15:50.88
And I thought, That's for sure.
00:15:50.91\00:15:52.35
Because during this
study, she's the one who
00:15:52.38\00:15:53.95
always interrupts it.
00:15:53.98\00:15:55.32
They said, loud,
quiet, pretty, funny,
00:15:55.35\00:16:00.16
individualistic,
sweet, and nice.
00:16:00.19\00:16:03.53
They seemed to be having a
good time as we went around.
00:16:03.56\00:16:06.23
Then I said, How
would you describe yourself?
00:16:06.26\00:16:12.23
What one word would
you use to describe you?
00:16:12.27\00:16:16.00
Instantly a chill
settled into the room.
00:16:16.04\00:16:19.87
They looked at one
another, not sure what to say.
00:16:19.91\00:16:23.45
It's okay, I said.
00:16:23.48\00:16:24.81
You can be honest.
00:16:24.85\00:16:26.18
Just share how you
would describe you.
00:16:26.21\00:16:30.52
I looked at the first girl.
00:16:30.55\00:16:32.25
She was the one who was
so eager to talk before.
00:16:32.29\00:16:34.96
The one who said her
friends would call her mouthy.
00:16:34.99\00:16:38.29
She looked up at
me, and I was surprised.
00:16:38.33\00:16:41.53
Now all that joy and
joking was replaced by pain.
00:16:41.56\00:16:45.03
And she said, depressed.
00:16:45.07\00:16:48.27
And then she dropped her eyes.
00:16:48.30\00:16:50.77
I said, Thank
you for being honest.
00:16:50.81\00:16:52.74
Who else wants to share?
00:16:52.77\00:16:54.84
We went around the circle.
00:16:54.88\00:16:57.71
They said, lonely,
scared, confused, afraid.
00:16:57.75\00:17:06.05
And then the
tears began to fall.
00:17:06.09\00:17:08.46
The next girl said, Angry.
00:17:08.49\00:17:11.13
And she kind of
twisted her hands in her lap.
00:17:11.16\00:17:13.80
There was one girl remaining.
00:17:13.83\00:17:16.46
And I said, What
about you, my sister?
00:17:16.50\00:17:18.63
How would you describe you?
00:17:18.67\00:17:21.20
I had to strain to
catch what she said,
00:17:21.24\00:17:24.71
because she
whispered so quietly.
00:17:24.74\00:17:26.81
She said, Broken.
And she just cried.
00:17:26.84\00:17:30.15
How skillfully Satan
weaves his web over our lives.
00:17:30.18\00:17:37.29
How he obscures God's
love, and the beautiful plan
00:17:37.32\00:17:41.76
that He has for us.
00:17:41.79\00:17:44.03
But do you know
what I love about God?
00:17:44.06\00:17:45.99
He doesn't look at us
through the mask other people
00:17:46.03\00:17:49.10
look at us through.
00:17:49.13\00:17:50.47
Neither does He look at us
through the lies that Satan has
00:17:50.50\00:17:53.64
told us about ourself.
00:17:53.67\00:17:55.17
After all, all that matters is
what does Jesus think about me?
00:17:55.20\00:18:00.84
What does He think about me?
00:18:00.88\00:18:02.54
Turn with me in your
Bible to Jeremiah, Jeremiah 31.
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It's one of my favorite promises
in the word of God; Jeremiah 31.
00:18:08.55\00:18:12.29
We're going to go real quickly
here through several Scriptures
00:18:12.32\00:18:16.36
that will
counteract the lies that Satan
00:18:16.39\00:18:18.86
tells us about ourself.
00:18:18.89\00:18:20.23
The Lord has appeared of
old unto me, saying, Yes, I have
00:18:23.13\00:18:27.90
loved you with an
everlasting love: therefore with
00:18:27.94\00:18:31.67
loving-kindness
I have drawn you.
00:18:31.71\00:18:34.11
You might say, Jill,
I'm not worth anything.
00:18:34.14\00:18:37.08
Jill, I'm not even
worthy to be loved.
00:18:37.11\00:18:39.51
And God says, I love you!
00:18:39.55\00:18:41.25
I have loved you
with an ever-lasting love.
00:18:41.28\00:18:44.09
What about John 6:37?
00:18:44.12\00:18:46.59
Jesus is speaking.
00:18:46.62\00:18:47.99
He says, Whoever comes to
Me I will never cast away.
00:18:48.02\00:18:54.13
So if you come to God He's not
going to say, I don't want you.
00:18:54.16\00:18:58.20
I don't want
anything to do with you.
00:18:58.23\00:18:59.97
He's going to say,
Come, I want to receive you.
00:19:00.00\00:19:04.41
What about John 14:27?
00:19:04.44\00:19:06.78
Jesus says, Peace I leave with
you, my peace I give to you:
00:19:06.81\00:19:11.31
not as the world
gives, give I unto you.
00:19:11.35\00:19:14.08
Let not your heart be troubled,
neither let it be afraid.
00:19:14.12\00:19:20.76
Are we confused? Are we afraid?
00:19:20.79\00:19:23.36
God says we don't
have to be afraid.
00:19:23.39\00:19:25.46
It doesn't matter the
way other people look at us
00:19:25.49\00:19:27.80
with that mask,
neither does it matter what we
00:19:27.86\00:19:30.13
think about ourselves.
00:19:30.17\00:19:31.50
All that matters is what
the Lord Jesus thinks about me.
00:19:31.53\00:19:35.74
What about Jeremiah 29:11?
00:19:35.80\00:19:38.64
The prophet says, Jesus says,
I know the plans I have for you,
00:19:38.67\00:19:42.61
says the Lord, plans to prosper
you, and not to harm you,
00:19:42.64\00:19:46.48
plans to give you
a future and a hope.
00:19:46.51\00:19:49.25
God says, I have a plan for
your life, and it's way better
00:19:49.28\00:19:52.85
than the life that
you're living right now.
00:19:52.89\00:19:55.96
The thief comes to
steal, kill, and destroy.
00:19:57.36\00:20:00.50
Jesus says, I have come
that they would have life,
00:20:00.53\00:20:03.97
and have it more abundantly.
00:20:04.00\00:20:07.37
Satan's the one who
brings death, destruction, evil,
00:20:07.40\00:20:11.07
and misery in this world.
00:20:11.11\00:20:12.81
God brings life, and He
brings us abundant life.
00:20:12.84\00:20:16.71
1 John 1:9. If we confess
our sins, He, Jesus Christ,
00:20:16.88\00:20:22.85
is faithful and just to forgive
us our sins, and to cleanse us
00:20:22.88\00:20:27.69
from all unrighteousness.
00:20:27.72\00:20:29.39
Whatever your impurity,
He's going to cleanse it.
00:20:29.42\00:20:33.50
John 16:20. Whatever our sorrow,
00:20:33.53\00:20:37.57
He will turn it to joy.
00:20:37.60\00:20:41.00
Weeping may endure for a night,
but joy comes in the morning.
00:20:41.04\00:20:45.34
What about 2 Corinthians 12:9?
00:20:45.37\00:20:47.61
Whatever my weakness,
He will give me strength.
00:20:47.64\00:20:51.65
He says, My grace
is sufficient for you,
00:20:51.68\00:20:54.95
for My strength is
made perfect in weakness.
00:20:54.98\00:20:58.22
Do you feel weak today?
00:20:58.25\00:20:59.59
Do you feel like
you're struggling,
00:20:59.62\00:21:01.66
and battling with temptation?
00:21:01.69\00:21:04.03
The Lord Jesus says, I
can exchange My strength
00:21:04.06\00:21:08.50
for your weakness.
00:21:08.53\00:21:10.23
I can give you grace for
what you're dealing with,
00:21:10.27\00:21:14.74
for what you're
experiencing today.
00:21:14.77\00:21:18.41
Our final
Scripture is Luke 4:18.
00:21:18.44\00:21:22.01
And this occurred when Jesus
went back to His hometown of
00:21:22.04\00:21:25.81
Nazareth, and He read from the
scroll of the prophet Isaiah.
00:21:25.85\00:21:29.55
And Isaiah had prophesied...
00:21:29.58\00:21:31.55
This is a Messianic prophecy.
00:21:31.59\00:21:33.49
This is something where
Isaiah had prophesied what
00:21:33.52\00:21:37.79
the Messiah would do.
00:21:37.83\00:21:39.16
And it said, He
came to set me free.
00:21:39.19\00:21:42.46
The Spirit of
the Lord is upon Me.
00:21:42.50\00:21:46.00
You know that verse.
00:21:46.03\00:21:47.37
He came to set us free.
00:21:47.40\00:21:49.87
I love God because He
never looks at us through
00:21:49.90\00:21:53.48
the mask that we wear.
00:21:53.51\00:21:54.84
Neither does He look at
us through the eyes we look
00:21:54.88\00:21:58.15
at ourself with, or
through the lies that Satan
00:21:58.18\00:22:01.48
has told us about ourself.
00:22:01.52\00:22:03.79
What He says when He looks
at you: He says, I love you.
00:22:03.82\00:22:07.42
I made you. I have
a plan for your life.
00:22:07.46\00:22:11.89
In just a moment
we're going to take a break.
00:22:11.96\00:22:14.13
And when we come back we will
do some practical application,
00:22:14.16\00:22:18.13
something that you can
take with you this week.
00:22:18.17\00:22:21.27
Something you can work on
this week as we incorporate
00:22:21.30\00:22:24.41
the principles of
Who am I in Jesus?
00:22:24.44\00:22:27.91