Please stay with us as 00:00:01.98\00:00:08.07 3ABN presents 00:00:08.10\00:00:16.22 this closed captioned program 00:00:16.25\00:00:24.84 Hello, my name is Michael Kontes 00:00:30.37\00:00:32.02 and I want to welcome 00:00:32.18\00:00:33.15 you to Faith Chapel. 00:00:33.16\00:00:34.13 Today we're going to look at 00:00:34.16\00:00:35.50 how Jesus would want 00:00:35.53\00:00:36.83 us to deal with conflict. 00:00:36.86\00:00:39.04 Let us pray. 00:00:39.07\00:00:40.22 Father we come to Thee now and we thank Thee for the 00:00:40.25\00:00:42.99 opportunity of opening up the Bread of Life 00:00:43.02\00:00:45.19 and learning how You would want us to be here on Earth 00:00:45.22\00:00:49.76 and how to deal with conflict. 00:00:49.79\00:00:51.70 Be with us now in Jesus name, Amen. 00:00:51.73\00:00:55.10 Has anyone ever hurt you? Has someone offended you 00:00:55.13\00:00:59.08 or sinned against you? 00:00:59.11\00:01:00.38 Probably not, right? 00:01:00.41\00:01:02.08 I'll bet all of us have been offended 00:01:02.11\00:01:06.96 by someone and someone has sinned against us at some time. 00:01:06.99\00:01:10.74 Today I'd like to share with you the most overlooked commandment 00:01:10.77\00:01:15.80 in the Word of God. 00:01:15.83\00:01:17.66 Let us open up to Matthew 18:15-17 00:01:17.69\00:01:25.12 This is so very important for us as Christians to realize God is 00:02:10.84\00:02:15.99 giving us a mandate, He's giving us a commandment here. 00:02:16.02\00:02:18.93 The same as in Matthew 28 where Jesus gives the Great Commission 00:02:18.96\00:02:23.94 where He tells us to go into the world and to all nations 00:02:23.97\00:02:26.94 to make disciples and to baptize them. 00:02:26.97\00:02:29.24 Here Jesus is telling us to go to our brother if he has 00:02:29.27\00:02:33.87 offended us, go to our sister 00:02:33.90\00:02:35.74 if she has offended us. And Go Alone 00:02:35.77\00:02:39.33 not with our posse, 00:02:39.36\00:02:41.58 not with 7 or 8 people to make us feel good, 00:02:41.61\00:02:44.48 in attack mode, 00:02:44.51\00:02:45.83 but go alone. 00:02:45.86\00:02:47.47 Why? 00:02:47.50\00:02:49.07 Why does the Word of God say, 'alone? ' 00:02:49.10\00:02:51.21 I'd like to share with you what I believe 00:02:51.24\00:02:53.27 what the Bible reveals to us, why we are to go alone. 00:02:53.30\00:02:56.60 First and foremost when we go alone 00:02:56.63\00:02:59.49 we do not expose our brother and sister 00:02:59.52\00:03:01.99 and make the circumstances harder. 00:03:02.02\00:03:03.88 We go in love and in care 00:03:03.91\00:03:07.45 to really heal the relationship if possible. 00:03:07.48\00:03:11.70 Now this does not guarantee that the relationship 00:03:11.73\00:03:15.00 will be healed automatically. 00:03:15.03\00:03:18.32 But, it ensures us that we are following the Word of God. 00:03:18.35\00:03:23.84 Now some of us might be saying, 00:03:23.87\00:03:26.68 "Well Pastor Mike, is email okay? " 00:03:26.71\00:03:32.47 "or can I get on my mobile phone and call the individual? " 00:03:32.50\00:03:36.32 Brothers and sisters, the Word of God does not say 00:03:36.35\00:03:39.57 that we can get on our AOL account, 00:03:39.60\00:03:41.77 our Juno account, Earthlink account, whatever account 00:03:41.80\00:03:45.16 and send an email to a brother or sister 00:03:45.19\00:03:47.78 who has offended us. 00:03:47.81\00:03:49.07 It does not say to get on the phone. 00:03:49.10\00:03:50.73 It says to physically go to our brother and sister and 00:03:50.76\00:03:54.80 to resolve this situation. 00:03:54.83\00:03:57.36 Now, if I was the pastor of your local church 00:03:57.39\00:04:01.04 and we're preparing for communion next week 00:04:01.07\00:04:04.91 and you came to the communion service 00:04:04.94\00:04:06.89 and I decided to use Wonder bread and Coca-Cola 00:04:06.92\00:04:10.72 for the symbols of communion 00:04:10.75\00:04:12.06 would that offend you? 00:04:12.09\00:04:13.25 I'm sure it would. 00:04:13.28\00:04:14.75 And I'm sure it would offend God. 00:04:14.78\00:04:17.88 I would be committing a grave sin. 00:04:17.91\00:04:20.20 Because the Bible mandates how we are 00:04:20.23\00:04:23.01 to have the communion service. 00:04:23.04\00:04:24.66 Yet, we as people so neglect 00:04:24.69\00:04:27.62 going to our brothers and our sisters 00:04:27.65\00:04:30.07 and to share with them alone because 00:04:30.10\00:04:32.32 we do not want to lower our walls and have God 00:04:32.35\00:04:37.07 transform our hearts. 00:04:37.10\00:04:40.14 Now, this is a tough situation 00:04:40.17\00:04:45.15 because as we lower our walls 00:04:45.18\00:04:48.39 and make ourselves vulnerable to our brother or to our sister 00:04:48.42\00:04:51.72 we might get hurt. 00:04:51.75\00:04:55.48 In fact there are times when a brother or sister 00:04:55.51\00:04:58.75 might not even accept what we're saying. 00:04:58.78\00:05:02.77 Should that stop us? 00:05:02.80\00:05:05.44 Should that stop us from following the biblical protocol? 00:05:05.47\00:05:09.41 You see I believe we do a great job 00:05:09.44\00:05:13.44 following the second part of this verse where it says, 00:05:13.47\00:05:18.50 "go with two or three. " 00:05:18.53\00:05:19.58 And even then we don't go about it with the right spirit. 00:05:19.61\00:05:22.92 We take two or three witnesses with us so we can show 00:05:22.95\00:05:26.88 our brothers or sisters who are coming with us, 00:05:26.91\00:05:29.02 "Look how this person is going to respond to me. " 00:05:29.05\00:05:31.14 "Look at this person, what they're going to say to me. " 00:05:31.17\00:05:34.06 "I told you so! " 00:05:34.09\00:05:37.83 Yet we neglect to realize how Jesus approached others. 00:05:37.87\00:05:45.83 You see many times when we go to our brother and sister 00:05:45.86\00:05:51.06 we want the situation to be fixed automatically. 00:05:51.09\00:05:53.77 But we have to realize that sometimes 00:05:53.80\00:05:58.03 and most of the time I should say 00:05:58.06\00:06:00.18 it's in God's timing. 00:06:00.21\00:06:02.36 As we read the Bible we are told over and over 00:06:02.39\00:06:06.24 that God bore with Lucifer long in Heaven 00:06:06.27\00:06:10.30 before Lucifer was expelled. 00:06:10.33\00:06:12.04 We also as we read the Scriptures find out that 00:06:12.07\00:06:15.55 Jesus bore with Judas for a long time. 00:06:15.58\00:06:18.71 Judas was a thief. 00:06:18.74\00:06:20.52 We're told in the book of John that Judas was a thief. 00:06:20.55\00:06:23.95 Judas was stealing from the bank account that the disciples had, 00:06:23.98\00:06:28.02 their 'Swiss bank account. ' 00:06:28.05\00:06:30.01 Jesus knew about it. 00:06:30.05\00:06:31.24 But did Jesus expose Judas to the group? 00:06:31.27\00:06:36.90 No He didn't. 00:06:36.93\00:06:40.05 Jesus tried to win Judas over. 00:06:40.08\00:06:43.19 Now we must serve God from principle and not feelings. 00:06:43.22\00:06:51.00 Sometimes the person who has offended us 00:06:51.03\00:06:53.72 doesn't even know they've offended us, has no clue. 00:06:53.75\00:06:59.65 And I'd like to share with you a personal story 00:06:59.68\00:07:01.97 that has happened to me. 00:07:02.00\00:07:03.11 I had a very good friend of mine 00:07:03.14\00:07:04.69 say something a while back that really offended me. 00:07:04.72\00:07:09.36 I decided to go about fixing this situation through email. 00:07:09.39\00:07:19.29 I sent my email. 00:07:19.32\00:07:21.75 The friend of mine replied back. 00:07:21.78\00:07:24.96 Didn't like what was said. 00:07:24.99\00:07:28.66 I replied back to that email. 00:07:28.69\00:07:34.03 Next thing you know we have 00:07:34.06\00:07:36.43 seven correspondences going back and forth 00:07:36.46\00:07:38.66 about how we've hurt each other 00:07:38.69\00:07:40.92 and how the other person is at fault. 00:07:40.95\00:07:45.39 When we go to the individual who has hurt us 00:07:45.42\00:07:49.49 in an humble spirit, face to face 00:07:49.52\00:07:52.30 and we lay down the sword 00:07:52.33\00:07:55.77 and allow Jesus Christ to work a transformation process 00:07:55.80\00:08:01.21 in this conflict resolution 00:08:01.24\00:08:03.92 where we can sit down and look at someone eye to eye 00:08:03.95\00:08:07.03 we are allowing God to be God. 00:08:07.06\00:08:14.85 Many times, once again, we don't like to do that. 00:08:14.88\00:08:19.50 We would rather go to a brother and sister in the church 00:08:19.53\00:08:22.59 and share how we've been hurt. 00:08:22.62\00:08:24.49 "Did you know Brother So-and-So hurt me? " 00:08:24.52\00:08:27.31 "You know Sister So-and-So, you know what she said " 00:08:27.34\00:08:30.27 "to me last week? " 00:08:30.30\00:08:32.06 We get a scar touched upon 00:08:32.09\00:08:37.84 and we begin to put our own spiritual ointment on 00:08:37.87\00:08:42.28 the same way when we go to others in the church 00:08:42.31\00:08:45.67 and try to garner sides. 00:08:45.70\00:08:49.80 And we begin to divide the church in half 00:08:49.83\00:08:52.64 because we are not humble enough 00:08:52.67\00:08:54.36 to go to our brother and our sister 00:08:54.39\00:08:56.59 when we have offended them. 00:08:56.62\00:08:59.17 I can share with you another personal note. 00:08:59.20\00:09:04.26 If my wife and I did not practice this principle 00:09:04.29\00:09:09.30 in the Bible, we'd be at odds with one another all the time. 00:09:09.33\00:09:13.02 We'd carry things with us 00:09:13.05\00:09:16.18 we'd begin to build resentment towards one another. 00:09:16.21\00:09:19.12 It would ripen into malice. 00:09:19.15\00:09:20.57 And next thing you know I am at odds with my helpmate. 00:09:20.60\00:09:24.44 But Jesus said if your brother, if your sister 00:09:24.47\00:09:30.11 if your wife, if your co-worker 00:09:30.14\00:09:33.19 whoever offends you, you are to go to them 00:09:33.22\00:09:37.53 with a humble contrite heart. 00:09:37.56\00:09:39.57 And share with them what they have done in hopes 00:09:39.60\00:09:42.55 that the relationship will be strengthened. 00:09:42.58\00:09:46.50 You see ultimately we carry our character to Heaven. 00:09:46.53\00:09:54.95 I also believe we have an opportunity 00:09:54.98\00:09:57.81 to carry relationships to Heaven. 00:09:57.84\00:09:59.97 And what God is trying to have us learn here on earth 00:10:00.00\00:10:06.95 is not only how to be holy 00:10:06.98\00:10:09.30 but how to be holy to others. 00:10:09.33\00:10:17.44 Usually when we choose not to go to our brother or sister 00:10:17.98\00:10:25.24 when this has taken place 00:10:25.27\00:10:27.62 and we go to the church 00:10:27.65\00:10:32.15 and we spread what people have done to us 00:10:32.18\00:10:34.91 and the church begins to divide 00:10:34.94\00:10:38.56 I can share with you that Jesus is hurting. 00:10:38.59\00:10:44.55 When Saul was going around killing Christians 00:10:44.58\00:10:51.31 Jesus meet Saul on the road to Damascus and said, 00:10:51.34\00:10:53.97 "Saul, why do you persecute me? " in the book of Acts. 00:10:54.00\00:10:59.49 We're also told by the writer John 00:10:59.52\00:11:02.61 that if we hate our brother 00:11:02.64\00:11:05.76 without a cause we are committing murder. 00:11:05.79\00:11:08.92 Many times it is our pride 00:11:08.95\00:11:13.69 and our selfishness and our past baggage 00:11:13.72\00:11:17.44 that keep us from practicing this first principle. 00:11:17.47\00:11:20.27 I think as a church many times we can do 00:11:20.30\00:11:23.18 the second part of this commandment 00:11:23.21\00:11:25.59 "take two or three " 00:11:25.62\00:11:27.48 and "take it to the church " 00:11:27.51\00:11:28.87 We can go through the motions and go through the proper steps 00:11:28.90\00:11:31.92 and say we've done that. 00:11:31.95\00:11:32.92 But we neglect the first part 00:11:32.93\00:11:35.89 of this commandment 00:11:35.92\00:11:37.02 which is to go 00:11:37.05\00:11:38.02 and go alone. 00:11:38.04\00:11:40.24 Do we care enough for our 00:11:40.27\00:11:43.62 brothers and sisters to go alone 00:11:43.66\00:11:45.91 or do we care more about ourselves? 00:11:45.94\00:11:48.15 Another experience I'd like to share with you is 00:11:48.18\00:11:52.63 when I've done this commandment in the way God wants me to do it 00:11:52.66\00:11:59.79 I have seen relationships restored. 00:11:59.82\00:12:02.92 I don't know about you but when I read 00:12:02.95\00:12:04.91 the Bible from Genesis to Revelation 00:12:04.94\00:12:06.97 God is in the business of restoring relationships. 00:12:07.00\00:12:10.10 Isn't that right? 00:12:10.13\00:12:12.53 God is trying to restore us 00:12:12.56\00:12:15.13 with the relationship that we have broken away from Him. 00:12:15.16\00:12:19.41 And in turn God wants to restore harmed relationships 00:12:19.44\00:12:23.96 that we have with others and that others have with us. 00:12:23.99\00:12:28.33 There was an opportunity that I had 00:12:28.36\00:12:32.40 to go and to share with a brother 00:12:32.43\00:12:34.51 something that he had done to me 00:12:34.54\00:12:37.66 and I went to him and basically, friends 00:12:37.69\00:12:42.30 we had a heart to heart conversation 00:12:42.33\00:12:45.27 where tears were shed and there was opportunity of healing 00:12:45.30\00:12:49.79 and I'm closer today with this brother 00:12:49.82\00:12:53.00 than I was in the past. 00:12:53.03\00:12:55.13 Because every experience we have with someone 00:12:55.16\00:12:59.40 we're either growing closer to that individual 00:12:59.43\00:13:02.73 or we're slipping away. 00:13:02.76\00:13:06.26 So when we have a very delicate situation 00:13:06.29\00:13:08.73 that arises when a brother sins against us 00:13:08.76\00:13:10.98 or a sister sins against us, 00:13:11.01\00:13:12.63 really what it boils down to is: do we care enough 00:13:12.66\00:13:18.02 about the relationship that we have 00:13:18.05\00:13:21.72 with this brother or sister? 00:13:21.75\00:13:24.58 Many of us have multiple friends 00:13:24.61\00:13:26.79 and sometimes what we do is we say, 00:13:26.82\00:13:27.99 "Well you know what, they did it, I'm going to " 00:13:28.02\00:13:30.57 "love 'em at church, I'm gonna smile and give 'em a hug " 00:13:30.60\00:13:33.49 and then when we have the opportunity 00:13:33.52\00:13:39.02 to put a dagger in their back 00:13:39.05\00:13:40.41 spread seeds of discontent 00:13:40.44\00:13:43.39 that's the first thing that we do. 00:13:43.42\00:13:45.70 That's not what Jesus would have for us to do. 00:13:45.73\00:13:50.72 Jesus would want us to humble our hearts once again 00:13:50.75\00:13:56.02 let down our pride 00:13:56.05\00:13:57.87 and have restoration from conflict 00:13:57.90\00:14:01.75 come about in such a way 00:14:01.78\00:14:05.20 that ultimately the unseen and unfallen worlds 00:14:05.23\00:14:09.57 can look upon us and say, 00:14:09.60\00:14:11.34 "You know what, look, Mike's a son of God " 00:14:11.37\00:14:15.27 "because he's practicing that commandment. " 00:14:15.30\00:14:17.53 Now I will also share with you 00:14:17.56\00:14:20.18 that because this is also an imperative in the Greek language 00:14:20.21\00:14:22.94 and which makes it a commandment 00:14:22.97\00:14:25.23 I like to call this the '11th commandment. ' 00:14:25.26\00:14:28.46 This commandment, I believe, shows us truly in a mirror 00:14:28.50\00:14:38.12 if we love God or if we love ourselves more. 00:14:38.15\00:14:42.02 This commandment shows us, do we love ourselves? 00:14:42.05\00:14:44.91 or our brothers and sisters more? 00:14:44.94\00:14:48.52 Now, you say, "Mike, you're being pretty strong today. " 00:14:48.55\00:14:52.84 "You seem like you have the answers for this. " 00:14:52.87\00:14:55.85 Yeah, unfortunately I have the answers because I've done it 00:14:55.88\00:14:58.29 so many times the wrong way 00:14:58.32\00:15:00.10 that God has impressed upon my heart how to do it the right way 00:15:00.13\00:15:08.78 There's a story in the book of Acts where Paul comes across 00:15:11.70\00:15:16.04 and he notices that Peter is being a little obstinate 00:15:16.07\00:15:21.98 towards the Gentiles. 00:15:22.01\00:15:24.48 And Paul pulls Peter aside 00:15:24.51\00:15:27.84 and begins to tell him what's going on. 00:15:27.87\00:15:32.70 Paul was offended at the actions of one of his fellow disciples. 00:15:32.73\00:15:42.21 Paul could have very easily turned his shoulder 00:15:42.24\00:15:45.09 and neglected Peter. 00:15:45.12\00:15:47.17 And Peter would have missed an opportunity to grow. 00:15:47.20\00:15:50.16 Ultimately friends, when we have these circumstances 00:15:50.19\00:15:55.34 come across our path, we're told among others, by a 00:15:55.37\00:15:58.52 19th century Christian writer once said, and I paraphrase, 00:15:58.55\00:16:04.84 that if we are to take every situation that comes 00:16:04.88\00:16:07.98 across our path as having the Hand of God allow this we could 00:16:08.01\00:16:15.43 look upon these situations through a different glass. 00:16:15.47\00:16:18.85 Instead of looking at it half empty 00:16:18.88\00:16:20.50 we could look at it half full. 00:16:20.53\00:16:22.06 So when a brother or sister sins against us 00:16:22.09\00:16:24.61 we don't have to look at it as, 00:16:24.64\00:16:25.76 "Oh my goodness I've been so hurt! " 00:16:25.79\00:16:27.90 And I go out and begin to pull out my spiritual 9mm's 00:16:27.93\00:16:33.25 and going after my brother and sister in church. 00:16:33.28\00:16:35.17 If I could humble myself for one minute 00:16:35.20\00:16:38.22 go in prayer 00:16:38.25\00:16:39.47 and ask God, "God what would You have for me to do? " 00:16:39.50\00:16:42.28 and I'll share something else friends 00:16:42.31\00:16:43.86 God would not have us to do anything 00:16:43.89\00:16:45.65 that goes against the Word of God. 00:16:45.68\00:16:50.04 So if the Word of God says, 'When our brother and sister ' 00:16:50.07\00:16:52.93 'have offended us we are to go to our brother and sister, ' 00:16:52.96\00:16:56.21 we are to go! 00:16:56.24\00:16:59.18 Once again, we could come up with excuses. 00:16:59.21\00:17:01.01 Now there are some situations 00:17:01.04\00:17:02.86 I have to admit are very difficult. 00:17:02.89\00:17:05.10 Someone could say, "Well, Pastor Mike " 00:17:05.13\00:17:07.21 "the person who offended me is now over in Europe or " 00:17:07.24\00:17:09.95 "over in South America and I don't know " 00:17:09.98\00:17:13.88 "if I'm going to be able to see this person face to face. " 00:17:13.91\00:17:16.27 These are tough situations and the only answer to that is, 00:17:16.30\00:17:18.96 you need to take that to prayer 00:17:18.99\00:17:21.06 and see what Jesus would have for you to do. 00:17:21.09\00:17:23.13 Maybe, if this person has offended you 00:17:23.16\00:17:25.84 you could take it into prayer 00:17:25.87\00:17:27.27 and the burden could be released then and there 00:17:27.30\00:17:30.62 and in due time God can begin to orchestrate 00:17:30.65\00:17:33.84 events to bring this person back into your life 00:17:33.87\00:17:36.09 where you're not so emotionally charged 00:17:36.12\00:17:38.56 or you'll start throwing daggers at your brother or sister. 00:17:40.82\00:17:43.07 Maybe in God's timing the emotions will have settled 00:17:43.10\00:17:48.05 you'll be able to explain to a brother or sister 00:17:48.08\00:17:52.93 in the proper manner. 00:17:52.96\00:17:55.64 Now this is one point I do want to bring out 00:17:55.67\00:17:57.40 also and that is, when we go to our brother 00:17:57.43\00:17:59.16 or sister alone, we need to go in a humble manner, 00:17:59.19\00:18:03.61 not with 'guns a blazing! ' 00:18:03.64\00:18:06.25 "DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME! " 00:18:06.28\00:18:08.94 No, that's not the protocol Jesus would have us take. 00:18:08.97\00:18:13.28 We're to go to our brother and sister and say, 00:18:13.31\00:18:14.88 "You know, there's a situation that has arisen " 00:18:14.91\00:18:18.29 "that I need to bring to our attention " 00:18:18.32\00:18:21.15 and I'd like to talk to you about it if that's okay. " 00:18:21.18\00:18:24.06 "Could I have prayer before we talk about this? " 00:18:24.09\00:18:28.39 And we go into prayer. 00:18:28.42\00:18:30.78 Now if the person at that time 00:18:30.81\00:18:32.49 senses that this is going to be a heavy conversation 00:18:32.52\00:18:35.25 and the person says, 00:18:35.28\00:18:36.25 "Now's not the right time can we set a time for next week? " 00:18:36.26\00:18:40.55 We're not to get huffy and puffy 00:18:40.58\00:18:42.25 "Oh my goodness, Brother Jack offended me " 00:18:42.28\00:18:45.56 "because he didn't want to settle the conflict. " 00:18:45.59\00:18:47.92 Well Brother Jack may be busy. 00:18:47.95\00:18:49.39 He may already have things on his list 00:18:49.42\00:18:52.76 to do for that day 00:18:52.79\00:18:56.38 and we have to be patient. 00:18:56.41\00:18:58.37 I think that's a word we hear throughout the Bible 00:18:58.40\00:19:01.34 in fact if I'm not mistaken 00:19:01.37\00:19:02.94 Revelation 14:12 says, "Here is the patience of the saints " 00:19:02.97\00:19:06.95 "here are they that keep the commandments of God " 00:19:06.98\00:19:08.60 "and have the faith of Jesus. " 00:19:08.63\00:19:10.70 Here are they that keep the commandments of God! 00:19:10.73\00:19:15.39 The commandment being, 'Go to our brother and sister ' 00:19:15.42\00:19:20.78 'Alone. ' 00:19:20.81\00:19:22.87 And we are to go to them and we are to be patient. 00:19:22.90\00:19:25.96 Meaning, in God's timing 00:19:25.99\00:19:30.04 all things work together 00:19:30.07\00:19:31.70 for good. 00:19:31.73\00:19:32.77 As a pastor this is very 00:19:34.37\00:19:38.05 very difficult commandment to sometimes teach. 00:19:38.08\00:19:46.04 The reason being is that sometimes 00:19:47.84\00:19:51.70 we may not model it ourselves. 00:19:51.73\00:19:54.77 And this is where I believe 00:19:54.80\00:19:56.63 that the leaders of the church 00:19:56.66\00:19:58.86 should be the first to be practicing this commandment. 00:19:58.89\00:20:05.75 As a pastor when someone comes to us and wants to say, 00:20:05.78\00:20:08.48 "Pastor Mike, I want to let you know that last week " 00:20:08.51\00:20:12.05 "Susie offended me and this is what Susie said to me " 00:20:12.08\00:20:15.00 and members begin to start sharing what's going on. 00:20:15.03\00:20:20.59 What do I do? How do I respond? 00:20:20.62\00:20:24.20 Do I care about gathering information 00:20:24.23\00:20:27.12 and I sit back and allow this member 00:20:27.15\00:20:29.13 to begin share with me all the beefs, 00:20:29.16\00:20:31.18 so I have my little black book 00:20:31.21\00:20:33.18 of what has been taking place in my church? 00:20:33.21\00:20:35.75 Or do I stop the member right away 00:20:35.78\00:20:41.82 and say, "Sister So-and-so " 00:20:41.85\00:20:43.54 "I believe that God wants you to go " 00:20:43.57\00:20:46.59 "to Susie and talk to Susie. " 00:20:46.62\00:20:49.03 "You see we're told in Matthew 18, if someone offends you " 00:20:49.06\00:20:53.49 "you are to go to them alone. " 00:20:53.52\00:20:55.36 "And by coming to me there's an opportunity " 00:20:55.39\00:20:59.13 "where I could share it with someone else. " 00:20:59.16\00:21:01.66 "Do you want me to share it with someone else? " 00:21:01.69\00:21:03.25 "No Pastor. I don't want you to share it with someone else. " 00:21:03.28\00:21:07.89 "You need to go and speak to Susie yourself. " 00:21:07.92\00:21:11.98 Now let's take this to a higher level. 00:21:12.01\00:21:13.42 From a pastor perspective let's go to a Conference situation. 00:21:13.45\00:21:16.05 Let's say there's a member 00:21:16.08\00:21:17.52 who's upset at a pastor. 00:21:17.55\00:21:20.40 And they go knocking on the conference door 00:21:20.43\00:21:22.10 or wanting to speak to the Ministerial Director 00:21:22.13\00:21:23.92 or the Conference President. 00:21:23.95\00:21:25.95 "Elder So-and-so " 00:21:25.98\00:21:28.07 "I need to talk to you about Pastor Michael. " 00:21:28.10\00:21:30.52 How should the conference leader approach this situation? 00:21:30.55\00:21:35.97 I believe once again, the Bible tells us how. 00:21:36.00\00:21:39.10 I believe that the Conference President 00:21:39.13\00:21:42.96 or the Ministerial Director or anyone in the conference 00:21:42.99\00:21:45.23 should be able to say, "Brother So-and-so " 00:21:45.26\00:21:47.58 "Sister So-and-so " 00:21:47.61\00:21:48.65 "it sounds like a real delicate issue. " 00:21:48.68\00:21:51.36 "But being in the position that I'm at " 00:21:51.39\00:21:54.54 "and being that Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior " 00:21:54.57\00:21:57.74 "I need to point you back to pastor Mike. " 00:21:57.77\00:22:00.92 "You need to go to Pastor Michael " 00:22:00.95\00:22:02.94 "and you need to settle that with Pastor Michael. " 00:22:02.97\00:22:04.89 "And you know, if Pastor Michael does not listen to you " 00:22:04.92\00:22:08.39 "you need to take two or three witnesses " 00:22:08.42\00:22:11.69 "and you guys need to go together " 00:22:11.72\00:22:14.38 "and you need to share what he's done to you. " 00:22:14.41\00:22:16.12 "Hopefully he'll get a chance to hear you. " 00:22:16.15\00:22:18.15 "And you know if you go with two or three witnesses " 00:22:18.18\00:22:21.35 "and Pastor Mike doesn't listen to them " 00:22:21.38\00:22:22.90 "you need to take it to the church body. " 00:22:22.93\00:22:25.10 Now, I also want to share about this commandment, 00:22:25.13\00:22:28.93 it's not just going to our brother once. 00:22:28.96\00:22:31.08 The reason why is many times we can go 00:22:31.11\00:22:34.04 with the wrong spirit as I've said. 00:22:34.07\00:22:35.84 We can go one time and we can be huffy and puffy 00:22:35.87\00:22:38.08 and if our brother doesn't listen to us 00:22:38.11\00:22:40.89 we can automatically think we're going to shift 00:22:40.92\00:22:42.98 into taking two or three witnesses. 00:22:43.01\00:22:45.24 I believe we can go multiple times to our brother and sister. 00:22:45.27\00:22:48.46 If Jesus can bear with Judas for three and a half years 00:22:48.49\00:22:52.30 we can sure try to emulate that example. 00:22:52.33\00:22:56.51 Amen? 00:22:56.54\00:22:57.51 Also, if Jesus and the Father 00:22:57.52\00:23:00.82 could take thousands of years, 00:23:00.85\00:23:03.46 maybe five thousand years, 00:23:03.49\00:23:07.95 no, not that long 00:23:07.98\00:23:11.86 maybe a week, two weeks, three weeks, maybe a year 00:23:11.89\00:23:14.57 to allow Lucifer in Heaven to run his course. 00:23:14.60\00:23:22.72 They gave him time. 00:23:22.75\00:23:25.51 That's a principle that God shares with us. 00:23:25.54\00:23:29.88 When someone offends us we are to give people time 00:23:29.91\00:23:33.03 to maybe realize what they've done to us. 00:23:33.06\00:23:36.35 But we have had that scab so scratched 00:23:36.38\00:23:40.53 and so hurt 00:23:40.56\00:23:42.31 the experience that has 00:23:42.34\00:23:44.87 brought so much pain to us 00:23:45.76\00:23:47.21 and then all the other experiences 00:23:47.24\00:23:49.16 that if we have not gotten victory over from the past 00:23:49.19\00:23:53.59 to begin to build up and then 00:23:53.62\00:23:55.27 we want to go to our brother and sister 00:23:55.30\00:23:57.16 upon edict and have them fix the situation then and now 00:23:57.19\00:24:03.21 Yet the Bible says, "Here's the patience of the saints. " 00:24:05.25\00:24:09.44 We are to keep the commandments of God 00:24:09.47\00:24:11.40 and have the faith of the Son. 00:24:11.43\00:24:15.86 Now, as we're preparing to close 00:24:15.89\00:24:20.56 I just want to share with you 00:24:20.59\00:24:22.90 the only way this commandment can be kept 00:24:22.93\00:24:28.40 is through the power and strength of the Holy Spirit. 00:24:28.43\00:24:33.37 We have to allow the divine power of Jesus Christ 00:24:33.40\00:24:37.55 to help us look at the situation 00:24:37.58\00:24:42.71 through His eyes. 00:24:42.74\00:24:45.47 So many times we look at it through 00:24:45.50\00:24:48.06 our goggles and our perspectives 00:24:48.09\00:24:50.50 and that which causes anger and malice 00:24:50.53\00:24:53.85 because we have been so offended. 00:24:53.88\00:24:55.78 Yet, brothers and sisters 00:24:55.81\00:24:59.08 have you ever offended God? 00:24:59.11\00:25:01.03 I can share with you that I have. 00:25:01.06\00:25:03.46 And I know that God has been patient with me. 00:25:03.49\00:25:05.56 And God has allowed 00:25:05.59\00:25:09.32 He's allowed me to come around 00:25:10.05\00:25:12.16 to see that He is worthy 00:25:12.19\00:25:16.73 of my worship, worthy of my obedience 00:25:16.76\00:25:20.22 and worthy of all my devotion. 00:25:20.25\00:25:24.17 So when we begin to look at others 00:25:24.20\00:25:26.46 through His eyes and through Matthew 18 00:25:26.49\00:25:32.34 we begin to realize that our God is the God of reconciliation 00:25:32.37\00:25:38.86 as mentioned in 2 Corinthians 5 00:25:38.90\00:25:41.04 God is in the business of reconciling the world 00:25:41.07\00:25:44.26 to Himself! 00:25:44.29\00:25:46.79 God is in the business 00:25:46.82\00:25:48.44 of reconciling you and I to Him. 00:25:48.47\00:25:54.66 The Father is in the business of reconciling families. 00:25:54.69\00:25:57.49 How many families have been destroyed 00:25:57.52\00:26:01.80 over Christmas dinners, Thanksgiving dinners 00:26:01.83\00:26:05.42 anniversaries, birthdays because someone said something 00:26:05.45\00:26:09.92 and lo and behold, the two brothers and sisters 00:26:09.95\00:26:12.70 did not talk to one another for ten years. 00:26:12.73\00:26:15.09 I am from Greek descent and was raised 00:26:15.12\00:26:19.86 to think when someone hurt you, you discarded them. 00:26:19.89\00:26:24.04 You didn't pay attention to them anymore. 00:26:24.07\00:26:26.69 even if it was a family member because, 00:26:26.72\00:26:28.64 'they crossed the line. ' 00:26:28.67\00:26:32.33 'They hurt you. ' 00:26:32.36\00:26:33.76 And so now you draw boundaries and stakes in the ground 00:26:33.79\00:26:37.59 and you don't allow these family members to come anywhere 00:26:37.62\00:26:42.12 over these boundaries. 00:26:42.15\00:26:46.40 What if God had done the same thing to Adam and Eve? 00:26:46.43\00:26:51.59 What if God had done the same thing to us? 00:26:51.62\00:26:57.15 I'm only going to allow you guys to get so close. 00:26:57.18\00:26:59.57 Because I know you are going to bring a lot of pain to my heart. 00:26:59.60\00:27:07.71 You see the Bible says in the Jeremiah 31 00:27:07.74\00:27:10.24 "I have loved you with an everlasting love " 00:27:10.27\00:27:13.72 God does not look at us as we are. 00:27:13.75\00:27:18.19 God looks at us as who we can be. 00:27:18.22\00:27:21.25 When Jesus came across through the Gospels 00:27:21.28\00:27:24.20 when He looked upon Nicodemus 00:27:24.23\00:27:27.68 He saw who Nicodemus could be. 00:27:27.71\00:27:29.38 When He saw Mary Magdalene He saw who Mary could be. 00:27:29.41\00:27:37.39 The lady at the well, He saw who she could be. 00:27:37.42\00:27:42.50 The question today to you, to us 00:27:42.53\00:27:49.11 when someone offends you do you see 00:27:49.14\00:27:53.10 who they can be? 00:27:53.13\00:27:57.48